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Speaker 1: Am I overreacting for wanting my mother in law to

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Speaker 1: apologize first?

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Speaker 2: Probably not. I feel like a lot of mother in

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Speaker 2: laws are loco anyways.

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Speaker 1: Intense and this answer the question of how do you handle.

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Speaker 3: A bad mother in law?

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Speaker 1: Uh and toss me two five to five says for background,

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Speaker 1: my fiance twenty seven male, and I twenty seven female,

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Speaker 1: have been together for ten years and are getting married

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Speaker 1: in September. Okay, his entire family waited about that long

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Speaker 1: and we were only sixteen when we got together.

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Speaker 3: Wow, yeah, ten years. I've forgot.

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Speaker 1: We're sticking to the classic college marriage family plan. His mom,

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Speaker 1: sixty two female, has been a unique character since they

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Speaker 1: met her. She's goofy, well spoken, and easy to talk

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Speaker 1: to you most of the time, though a bit more

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Speaker 1: stiff than my family. We've never had any issues and

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Speaker 1: have always gotten along grate I love her, and she's

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Speaker 1: told me they see me as family already and have

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Speaker 1: for years before we got engaged. It's also notable that

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Speaker 1: she's almost entirely deaf without her hearing aids, and even

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Speaker 1: with them, she doesn't do great.

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Speaker 2: I feel like that's a really important detail, Like.

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Speaker 1: Just so everyone knows this is going to come into

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Speaker 1: play later. We're used to speaking a bit slower and

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Speaker 1: more clearly for her, and have no problem repeating things

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Speaker 1: if needed, if need be. My fiance has a sister,

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Speaker 1: twenty female who's in college and not currently looking for

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Speaker 1: a relationship, so she pop probably won't be planning a

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Speaker 1: wedding for a while. She's twenty yeah, yeah, she's twenty

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Speaker 1: twenty seven. Yeah, she's twunny.

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Speaker 3: Given out close to.

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Speaker 1: My mother in law and I are or were. I

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Speaker 1: wanted to include her in my bridal shopping, and we

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Speaker 1: both try to include our parents in what we can.

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Speaker 1: My mom and grandma intended my bridal appointment with me

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Speaker 1: because mother in law was sick and didn't want to

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Speaker 1: get Grandma ill, texting me the morning of to tell

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Speaker 1: me she would understand if I rather she not come

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Speaker 1: Because of this.

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Speaker 3: My grandma is in.

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Speaker 1: Remission after her third battle with breast cancer and is

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Speaker 1: well into her seventies, so I agreed that maybe that

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Speaker 1: would be best. I wound up finding my dress the

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Speaker 1: same day. I had a beautiful moment with my mom

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Speaker 1: and grandma. I wish she could have been there.

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Speaker 2: Sweet that yes, that's sweet, that's right right? Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Then later on Facebook. I see she felt well enough

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Speaker 1: to go out to an event with a bunch of friends,

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Speaker 1: and she certainly didn't look ill and any of the photos.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, this is why social media messes with

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Speaker 2: all of our heads, y'all.

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Speaker 3: It's so funny. Did you have to post?

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Speaker 2: Girls?

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Speaker 4: Why?

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Speaker 3: Why'd you have to post?

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Speaker 2: I mean, obviously don't lie, but like, don't lie and post?

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Speaker 5: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Why and give proof that you lie?

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think a lot of people who are like older

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Speaker 1: and didn't necessarily grow up with this kind of technology

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Speaker 1: don't always understand that everyone's going to see that, Like, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I'll just post it. That's fine, just showing it to

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Speaker 1: my bread friend.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Oh man.

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Speaker 1: Our wedding venue also has decor where we can choose

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Speaker 1: from and they will decorate for us. The owner invited

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Speaker 1: us over to make a timeline for the wedding, for

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Speaker 1: the wedding day and to iron out a few details.

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Speaker 1: Wedding is September eighth, so there's still time for specifics

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Speaker 1: and little things. The issue started before we even went.

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Speaker 1: She was made aware of the appointment well in advance

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Speaker 1: and was very excited to come. I made sure to

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Speaker 1: text her a week before and three days before to

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Speaker 1: remind her, as is the standard procedure when making plans

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Speaker 1: with her, because she tends.

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Speaker 3: To be forgetful.

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Speaker 1: So I'm sitting in the living room playing Balder's Gate

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Speaker 1: three sick, and I can hear my fiance on the

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Speaker 1: phone with her upstairs. We call our moms at least

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Speaker 1: once a week to chat, and he has a tendency

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Speaker 1: to wander around the house when he does. I could

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Speaker 1: hear the conversation he was having just at the top

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Speaker 1: of the stairs, and I overheard her speakerphone tell him

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Speaker 1: his father was coming home on Wednesday, the day of

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Speaker 1: the appointment, and they wanted to watch a shuffle board competition,

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Speaker 1: not play watch. She asked him to ask me to

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Speaker 1: reschedule for another day so she could watch shuffle board.

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Speaker 2: Yo, come on, now, come on, what shovel board wedding planning?

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Speaker 2: Shuffle board wedding planning.

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Speaker 1: You know, maybe she just really loves shuffle board. She's like,

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Speaker 1: this is the shuffle board Like, this is the Olympic

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Speaker 1: shuffle boarding event event.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Uh, the top.

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Speaker 1: Shuffle boarder will be there and we'll never have that

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Speaker 1: moment again. We got we won tickets from a radio

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Speaker 1: competition and it's in Paris.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, if that were the case, go ahead, do you know?

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Speaker 3: Yeah?

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Speaker 2: Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Oh lord.

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Speaker 1: He politely told her if she had other plans and

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Speaker 1: couldn't make it, it was all right. She didn't have

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Speaker 1: to come, not in a rude way.

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Speaker 3: And she knew that. No worries there.

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Speaker 1: She insists that she does have to come to the appointment,

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Speaker 1: and again asks him to ask me to risk out,

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Speaker 1: so she feels she has to come, but makes no

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Speaker 1: attempts to prioritize it. I could not believe she had

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Speaker 1: the audacity to ask that everyone moved their plans around

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Speaker 1: over a shuffleboard game.

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Speaker 2: I don't know how people operate that way. I don't understand.

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Speaker 1: I don't understand how you can be that entitled. Yeah

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Speaker 1: it's wild. Yeah, I didn't even know they had any

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Speaker 1: interest in it.

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Speaker 3: This was out of the blue.

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Speaker 1: That'd be so funny if she had never talked about

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Speaker 1: shuff She's like, no, but really watching.

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Speaker 3: All those ticks and those Facebook reels and I love it.

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Speaker 2: But what even is shovel board? Don't Oh? Isn't it

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Speaker 2: like where you boom like a big backgammon thing?

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Speaker 3: Yeah? I think so.

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Speaker 1: And it's like you you're trying to like get it

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Speaker 1: close to a thing, right yeaheah. I think it's something

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Speaker 1: like that. I think I've played it before. Okay, we're

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Speaker 1: getting thing.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like a very active game for someone in their sixties,

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Speaker 2: which is good.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Dixie Blue Steele says she probably has early stage dementia,

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Speaker 1: which you know, it could be possible because they talked

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Speaker 1: about her memory issues. However, it doesn't seem like she

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Speaker 1: forgot about it.

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Speaker 2: Maybe she did, she just thinks her plans are more important. Yeah,

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Speaker 2: sounds like a narcissist. Actually, Yeah, mixed moves a lot.

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Speaker 2: Says it must have been the shuffliest board that ever.

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Speaker 3: It better have been. It freaking better.

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Speaker 1: Oh, it's got you got the stick? Yeah, it's this

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Speaker 1: is like the thing that you play on cruises.

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Speaker 2: Wow, that looks fun.

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Speaker 1: There's always like a shuffle I've never been on a cruise,

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Speaker 1: but I've been once, but I presume there's shuffle board

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Speaker 1: going on.

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Speaker 2: There should be.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, if there's not there, he should be, there should be.

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Speaker 1: I want to watch it, Miss a decorading woman. Naturally,

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Speaker 1: we each invited our parents to the appointments at the venue.

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Speaker 1: His dad travels for work, So it wound up being

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Speaker 1: his mom and my parents forty seven female and forty

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Speaker 1: nine male young parents young. She's twenty seven. Wow, that's

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Speaker 1: really young. That's really even This kind.

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Speaker 2: Of tracks right because because the wayop he said it

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Speaker 2: was high school, college, like, it seems very like that's

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Speaker 2: what they saw.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, what I mean, twenty seven is not super

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Speaker 3: super early. But yeah, I just.

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Speaker 2: You're like, I'm like, I am so far from marriage.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, no, I definitely, I definitely will not be

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Speaker 1: ready to marry at twenty seven, but at least it's

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Speaker 1: not twenty one, right, Yeah, because we do really read

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Speaker 1: a lot of stories and sometimes, of course they work

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Speaker 1: out fine and people are very happy. But I I

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Speaker 1: cannot imagine myself getting married right now.

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Speaker 5: Wait, how long do you have to another person before

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Speaker 5: you get married?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: I don't know if there's necessarily a hard and fast.

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Speaker 5: Rule, like six months, A little bit longer than that,

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Speaker 5: A year.

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Speaker 2: I would say, I would say at least a year.

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Speaker 1: I think at least a year. My thing is also

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Speaker 1: I think that a person you should live together. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: if again, like prefacing as long as that's not outside

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Speaker 1: of your religion and stuff.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but if if you're okay with that, I think

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Speaker 1: you should live together.

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Speaker 2: See how you guys see how it works?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, because you know you can learn a lot about

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Speaker 3: a person.

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Speaker 5: Uh comment, how quick you guys got together? Yeah, the chat?

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Speaker 3: You guys are in the chat.

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Speaker 5: Wait.

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Speaker 1: Bell Conclict says, I know what episode of Sweet Life

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Speaker 1: on Deck Sophia.

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Speaker 3: Got that from the shovel board. I don't know. I

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Speaker 3: feel like I've seen a lot of oops.

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Speaker 2: I love sweet Fun.

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Speaker 3: Deck was great, Yes, solid show.

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Speaker 1: I think I watched more of Sweet Life on Deck

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Speaker 1: than I did Sweed Life Exacond Cody.

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Speaker 2: I remember I met Debbie Ryan at wet Seal.

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Speaker 3: What's wet Seal?

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Speaker 2: Dude? Not how much older am I than you? But like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: okay wet Seal. Anybody remember that store. I don't know

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Speaker 2: if it was just here like in La California or anyway.

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Speaker 2: It was like a like another Forever twenty one vibe.

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Speaker 2: And I remember Debbie Ryan was there with the stylist

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Speaker 2: from Sweet Life on Deck and they were pulling stuff

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Speaker 2: and it was before she was on the show. Wow,

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Speaker 2: this is Debbie. She's going to be on Sweet Life

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Speaker 2: on Deck. Yeah?

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Speaker 3: Wait, she introduced.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, because I was in the dressing room and we

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Speaker 2: were like, yeah, you.

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Speaker 3: Were chatting, Debbie.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and did you had you watched like Sweet Life

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Speaker 1: of Zack and Cody. Yeah, okay, so you know, oh yeah, wow,

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Speaker 1: Yeah that's pretty saying.

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Speaker 2: Anyway, you guys didn't need that story, but we love

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Speaker 2: it these days. Debbie, she's married to the twenty one pilots. Yeah, Debbie,

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Speaker 2: she's actually been involved in a lot of memes. I

216
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Speaker 2: think people think she's kind of comical.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think she's very memorable. She is memorable, insatiableable, weird, weird.

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Speaker 3: I never watched it because we thought it would be

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Speaker 3: too weird weird. Yeah, oh yeah yeah, get store Jesse.

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Speaker 2: Jesse, I met, sorry, I met and married my husband

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Speaker 2: in seventeen days.

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Speaker 5: Wow, that is days.

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Speaker 1: Was it like, was it like in a like arranged

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Speaker 1: kind of thing, because that Shana sometimes, I mean, you

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Speaker 1: have an arranged marriage and the families have been okay.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, maybe it was that kind of situation.

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Speaker 5: Shana find me on Discord police.

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Speaker 1: I want a little bit more inform me too, that

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Speaker 1: is my guess. But if there's another reason. Wow, the

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Speaker 1: venue owner, let's call her Jenny is a fun, easy going,

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Speaker 1: door key, laid back person and she's great. She's just

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Speaker 1: like me and we have so much in common. I

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Speaker 1: even joked to my mom that I should just marry Jenny.

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Speaker 5: Do it?

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Speaker 1: I you bet, you bet you won't, but you won't.

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Speaker 2: What odds.

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Speaker 1: We were all sitting around a table making our game

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Speaker 1: plan for the wedding, using tablecloth colors and whatnot. It

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Speaker 1: was all okay, with minor hiccups caused by mother in

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Speaker 1: law's somewhat droppy social skills, partially due to the fact

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Speaker 1: that only one of her hearing aids was working that day.

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Speaker 1: This meant Jenny had to repeat herself several times. Re

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Speaker 1: explained the same thing immediately afterwards, and we tried to

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Speaker 1: help her and help explain to mother in law. He

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Speaker 1: was professional, but she seemed a bit uncomfortable as time

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Speaker 1: went on, and mother in law kept low key, trying

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Speaker 1: to make the decisions for us. Okay, this is that's

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's a little bit difficult of a situation

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Speaker 1: if she's not hearing it. Yeah, yeah, I think it's

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Speaker 1: it's less on her this time because she's probably like like,

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Speaker 1: she's probably not hearing it and was like, oh, what

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Speaker 1: if you did this?

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Speaker 3: And I'm like, well, we already talked about that, right.

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Speaker 2: Sounds like there might be some tension here that we're

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Speaker 2: not really aware of. You know, clearly they have a

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Speaker 2: good relationship, it seems, yeah, but there might be some tension.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that. Yeah, because if it's just like her.

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Speaker 2: Here, yeah, come on now.

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Speaker 3: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Jenny kept trying to redirect the conversation and politely remind

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Speaker 1: her that the choices were for my fiance and I

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Speaker 1: to make, implying that we had plenty of time to

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Speaker 1: figure out the specifics and it didn't need to be decided. Now.

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Speaker 1: We'll make what we tell them and supply so there's

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Speaker 1: no need to know yet. Yeah, miss Jamers says, write

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Speaker 1: it down. Get a little whiteboard, mm hmm, or get

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Speaker 1: a computer. Mother in law got to meet drunk me

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Speaker 1: at a wedding a few months ago, and we talked

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Speaker 1: and talked and had a great time. She showed me

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Speaker 1: a new kind of cocktail and was really pushing to

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Speaker 1: have it at my wedding too.

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Speaker 3: The drink was good, but not my favorite.

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Speaker 1: I really don't think I want it as one of

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Speaker 1: the feature drinks at my wedding, and I politely said

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Speaker 1: no to that suggestion, but she kept bringing it up

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Speaker 1: and pushing about it. I'm not a bridezilla, but honestly,

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Speaker 1: after so many polite shutdowns, I put my foot down

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Speaker 1: and firmly said no. Honestly, I might have even snapped

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Speaker 1: at her. This is the one day where I'm allowed

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Speaker 1: to be selfish, the one day where I don't have

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Speaker 1: to make allowances for mother in law like everyone usually does.

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Speaker 3: Yes for once, what I say goes and I said.

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Speaker 2: No, yes, yeah, your wedding.

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Speaker 3: Your wedding.

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Speaker 1: Later Jenny asked if we were doing the shoe game,

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Speaker 1: dollar dance, candle lighting or anything like that.

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Speaker 3: I'm not familiar.

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Speaker 5: Got full board.

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Speaker 3: The mother was like, please stop the board.

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Speaker 2: Okay, that would be fun to have, like all these

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Speaker 2: huge games at a wedding.

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Speaker 3: Like, oh, I want to have games at my wedding, right,

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Speaker 3: that sounds great.

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Speaker 2: Like a big tic tac toe and a big one.

295
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Speaker 3: Of those chessboards.

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Speaker 5: Yeah, you know that part in the wedding where people

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Speaker 5: are taking photos and all the families like, oh, now

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Speaker 5: we have to talk to one another. Yeah, I want

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Speaker 5: a comedy set there. I want to get a comedian

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Speaker 5: and they just get after it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, interesting, I want I want? I actually don't know

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Speaker 3: what I want.

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Speaker 2: I don't know. Yeah, I have no idea what I'm

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Speaker 2: just I'm thinking about shuffle board.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't know what.

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Speaker 1: I want, but I don't know I want shuffle boards.

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Speaker 1: Mother in law tried to persuade me to do the

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Speaker 1: candle thing. What is the candle thing? But I'm honestly

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Speaker 1: not interested. Again, I politely said I don't think I

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Speaker 1: want to do it, and we did discuss what it

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Speaker 1: usually entails, and it confirmed that neither I nor my

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00:13:43,000 --> 00:13:46,800
Speaker 1: fiance really wanted to do it. I said, we really

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Speaker 1: want photos like that. We can just do it in

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Speaker 1: nice clothes in the summer, but I don't want to

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Speaker 1: do it on my wedding day. But she kept pushing.

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Speaker 1: I know she meant well, but I turned it down

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Speaker 1: several times before I again firmley said, know. I didn't

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00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:04,040
Speaker 1: raise my voice, just spoke confidently. Do you think that

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00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:06,520
Speaker 1: she's talked to her fiance about this? I think she

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00:14:06,520 --> 00:14:09,000
Speaker 1: should if she hasn't, because I think she needs to

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00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,360
Speaker 1: express Hey, like your mom's getting a little.

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Speaker 2: Back off this.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, because I think that now it's just kind

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Speaker 1: of falling on her like she's looking like the a

325
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Speaker 1: hole because she's having to shut this.

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Speaker 3: Mother in law down so much, shut her down, shut her.

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Speaker 5: Down, and the fiance looks like he is the middleman.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't have to be so hot.

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Speaker 5: And on the phone call yea mother in law was like,

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Speaker 5: can you please ask him to her to move her y?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I know, I think that.

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Speaker 1: I think he needs to be a little bit more

333
00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:43,800
Speaker 1: involved in this situation where it's gonna get messy.

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Speaker 3: I know my parents know.

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Speaker 1: I have always known what I want and don't want, oh,

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00:14:48,800 --> 00:14:51,240
Speaker 1: and don't want. Honestly, I thought mother in law now too.

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00:14:51,680 --> 00:14:53,600
Speaker 1: My mom was proud of me for standing up for

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00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:56,680
Speaker 1: myself for once and taking charge. It came to a

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00:14:56,720 --> 00:14:58,440
Speaker 1: head when we were discussing what to do with the

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00:14:58,480 --> 00:15:00,720
Speaker 1: bar option. We just I had to go with the

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00:15:00,760 --> 00:15:03,800
Speaker 1: one where we provide the alcohol and choose a few

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Speaker 1: drinks to feature at the reception.

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Speaker 2: Uh.

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Speaker 1: Oh, she's gonna want her. She wants special coach, she

345
00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:11,920
Speaker 1: wants it. Danny will supply bartenders. As mother in law

346
00:15:12,000 --> 00:15:14,400
Speaker 1: is trying to dominate the combo, she's leaning closer and

347
00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:17,680
Speaker 1: closer to Jenny, who's getting increasingly uncomfortable.

348
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Speaker 2: Okay, okay, do me fair.

349
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:22,800
Speaker 3: Yeah. Maybe she's leaning closer because she can't hear her.

350
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Speaker 1: Yeah, Like I feel like that's what my grandparents do.

351
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Speaker 3: My grandparents are hard of hearing.

352
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:31,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're just leaning close. Yeah.

353
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Speaker 3: I yell at them and in like a meanway, just

354
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Speaker 3: thinking I'm like, hey, this is what I'm saying. You

355
00:15:37,440 --> 00:15:38,080
Speaker 3: can't hear me.

356
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Speaker 2: Yeah. This feels like she's just trying to pick something

357
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Speaker 2: apart because she's annoyed by Yeah.

358
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Speaker 1: Yeah, the other in law is like trying to and

359
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:50,480
Speaker 1: it is annoying that the mom is the mother in

360
00:15:50,560 --> 00:15:52,360
Speaker 1: law is trying to insert herself. But I think a

361
00:15:52,400 --> 00:15:55,880
Speaker 1: lot of these little things that she's bringing up seemed

362
00:15:55,920 --> 00:15:59,160
Speaker 1: to be more in line with her being.

363
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Speaker 3: Hard of hearing.

364
00:16:00,240 --> 00:16:00,400
Speaker 1: Yeah.

365
00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:02,120
Speaker 3: I don't know. Some of it is hard being a.

366
00:16:02,120 --> 00:16:05,840
Speaker 1: Title, and some of it's just being heard, which is like, yeah,

367
00:16:06,120 --> 00:16:07,720
Speaker 1: give her some slack and some stuff. I know.

368
00:16:08,600 --> 00:16:09,880
Speaker 3: I don't know. Maybe that's just me though.

369
00:16:10,240 --> 00:16:13,080
Speaker 2: I want something. I want like something to happen. Yeah,

370
00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:15,960
Speaker 2: I want like mom in law to just do something wild,

371
00:16:16,840 --> 00:16:18,960
Speaker 2: something crazy.

372
00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:22,760
Speaker 1: She never raised her voice, but she kept pressing the

373
00:16:22,800 --> 00:16:25,240
Speaker 1: issue of wanting slash expecting Jenny to have a list

374
00:16:25,280 --> 00:16:28,800
Speaker 1: of drink suggestions. She did say most people do a vodka,

375
00:16:28,920 --> 00:16:32,600
Speaker 1: a whiskey, et cetera, but didn't suggest anything specifically because

376
00:16:32,640 --> 00:16:35,360
Speaker 1: it isn't her specialty and it's our choice Beyonce and

377
00:16:35,440 --> 00:16:37,400
Speaker 1: I and she had to repeat So I think this

378
00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:39,680
Speaker 1: is Jenny saying this. And she had to repeat this

379
00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:42,960
Speaker 1: several times, explaining there was plenty of time for us

380
00:16:43,080 --> 00:16:45,560
Speaker 1: to discuss it, and she tried to move along to

381
00:16:45,600 --> 00:16:50,040
Speaker 1: the next item, but mother in law kept pressing. M

382
00:16:51,960 --> 00:16:54,240
Speaker 1: dan Digital says mother in law needs to insert her

383
00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:58,520
Speaker 1: hearing aid, not herself. Now, I think this is leaning

384
00:16:58,520 --> 00:17:01,440
Speaker 1: into she's inserting her like back right, yeah, Like before

385
00:17:01,480 --> 00:17:02,760
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, it's hearing ad, but I think

386
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:04,160
Speaker 1: this is yeah backin.

387
00:17:04,160 --> 00:17:06,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, And she just shouldn't be a part of this.

388
00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe they should just stop it fighting.

389
00:17:08,600 --> 00:17:12,160
Speaker 2: That's the thing I get inviting to the dress shopping,

390
00:17:12,240 --> 00:17:15,120
Speaker 2: Like that's really nice having family, I imagine, But like

391
00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:18,320
Speaker 2: the drinks and the cake tasting.

392
00:17:18,000 --> 00:17:20,360
Speaker 1: In this, I don't think those are always things that

393
00:17:20,840 --> 00:17:23,000
Speaker 1: you know, extended family come to anyway. Yeah, Like I

394
00:17:23,000 --> 00:17:25,600
Speaker 1: think sometimes that is just like a partner in you, right,

395
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:27,600
Speaker 1: So maybe maybe just saying, Hey, we're just.

396
00:17:27,520 --> 00:17:28,120
Speaker 3: Going to do this.

397
00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:30,440
Speaker 2: We're don't even have to tell them.

398
00:17:30,480 --> 00:17:32,280
Speaker 3: You don't even tell them, don't even tell them, don't

399
00:17:32,320 --> 00:17:33,359
Speaker 3: even know hear it.

400
00:17:33,400 --> 00:17:39,680
Speaker 1: Anyways, mother in law isn't very observant and isn't very

401
00:17:39,680 --> 00:17:42,000
Speaker 1: good at reading the room. We could all feel the

402
00:17:42,119 --> 00:17:45,879
Speaker 1: tension rising as Jenny got more and more uncomfortable, with

403
00:17:45,920 --> 00:17:49,120
Speaker 1: mother in law showing signs of anxiety. Both my fiance

404
00:17:49,200 --> 00:17:52,560
Speaker 1: and I tried explaining again and trying to get her

405
00:17:52,560 --> 00:17:54,640
Speaker 1: to move on from the specific drinks that don't matter

406
00:17:54,720 --> 00:17:59,439
Speaker 1: yet wedding is in September. Finally, Jenny cracked and looked

407
00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:02,640
Speaker 1: dead at me and said, I'm sorry, this is feeling hostile.

408
00:18:04,600 --> 00:18:05,400
Speaker 3: What do you think about that?

409
00:18:06,560 --> 00:18:09,040
Speaker 2: I don't know, So in front of mother in law

410
00:18:09,080 --> 00:18:11,200
Speaker 2: she said that I feel like you don't you don't

411
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:11,880
Speaker 2: call that out.

412
00:18:12,600 --> 00:18:14,679
Speaker 3: She's like, too, I feel like that's.

413
00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:16,879
Speaker 1: A weird I think that if you're I don't know,

414
00:18:16,880 --> 00:18:20,760
Speaker 1: if you're like a professional person, I would exactly.

415
00:18:20,960 --> 00:18:22,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like there's a way to.

416
00:18:22,760 --> 00:18:24,440
Speaker 2: That wasn't the way to do it. Yeah, I think

417
00:18:24,440 --> 00:18:26,840
Speaker 2: it's like you finished that conversation and after the fact

418
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:29,520
Speaker 2: you go to op and you're like, Hey, I'm feeling

419
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:32,359
Speaker 2: a little uncomfortable. I think moving forward, we need to

420
00:18:32,440 --> 00:18:33,280
Speaker 2: plan this a bit.

421
00:18:33,160 --> 00:18:36,119
Speaker 1: Differently, like maybe I don't feel like comfortable being around

422
00:18:36,160 --> 00:18:37,640
Speaker 1: being Yeah, I don't think.

423
00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:39,200
Speaker 2: I don't know if I.

424
00:18:39,119 --> 00:18:40,440
Speaker 3: Would have done that in the room.

425
00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:45,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, trying to avoid looking at mother in law, who

426
00:18:45,520 --> 00:18:48,879
Speaker 1: immediately got infunded, who said, do you feel I am

427
00:18:48,920 --> 00:18:52,879
Speaker 1: attacking you? Jenny says, yes, I do. Poor Jenny is

428
00:18:53,000 --> 00:18:55,359
Speaker 1: visibly shaken as she stands up for herself and as

429
00:18:55,480 --> 00:18:58,199
Speaker 1: calm a manner as she can. She has anxiety like me,

430
00:18:58,359 --> 00:19:00,840
Speaker 1: and neither of us were doing well. We made it

431
00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:05,080
Speaker 1: about a fourth five minutes into the appointment. Four or

432
00:19:05,119 --> 00:19:06,680
Speaker 1: five minutes into the appointment.

433
00:19:07,400 --> 00:19:08,800
Speaker 3: For asking you for drink.

434
00:19:08,560 --> 00:19:11,399
Speaker 1: Suggestions, mother in law proceeds to slam her hands on

435
00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:14,160
Speaker 1: the table. Okay, that's a little intense, Yeah, echoing very

436
00:19:14,200 --> 00:19:16,200
Speaker 1: loudly in the barn menu and grabs her coat.

437
00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:16,920
Speaker 3: I can't.

438
00:19:16,960 --> 00:19:19,320
Speaker 1: I don't deal with stress well, and immediately teared up

439
00:19:19,359 --> 00:19:22,399
Speaker 1: with a double order nausea. Fine, if I'm not wanted,

440
00:19:22,480 --> 00:19:25,160
Speaker 1: I'll go, and proceeds to stomp out.

441
00:19:25,960 --> 00:19:29,960
Speaker 2: Well, is it getting so dramatic over some cocktails?

442
00:19:30,040 --> 00:19:32,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, Josephina Mandola's berkey says, no, she is right in

443
00:19:32,640 --> 00:19:33,280
Speaker 1: calling it out.

444
00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:34,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that.

445
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:38,480
Speaker 1: I think how I think it should have been done.

446
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:40,560
Speaker 1: I think they should have addressed this way sooner. I

447
00:19:40,560 --> 00:19:42,159
Speaker 1: think she just shouldn't. I think I agree with you,

448
00:19:42,240 --> 00:19:43,879
Speaker 1: she shouldn't have been going to the appointments earlier.

449
00:19:44,080 --> 00:19:47,480
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, but again, like you said, it's not professional

450
00:19:47,520 --> 00:19:49,760
Speaker 2: to call that out in the moment, and I really

451
00:19:49,800 --> 00:19:53,040
Speaker 2: think it could have just I don't know. It's hard though,

452
00:19:53,040 --> 00:19:54,760
Speaker 2: when our emotions get the best of us in the.

453
00:19:54,960 --> 00:19:56,880
Speaker 3: She has anxiety, she's probably she probably.

454
00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:00,320
Speaker 1: This is a lot especially of like the slamming that

455
00:20:00,440 --> 00:20:02,600
Speaker 1: was well, yeah, because I feel like before it didn't

456
00:20:02,640 --> 00:20:05,240
Speaker 1: that she didn't ope, he didn't say exactly what was

457
00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:08,880
Speaker 1: so like no making her Jenny so uncomfortable.

458
00:20:08,440 --> 00:20:10,440
Speaker 3: But the slamming of hands, I don't know. I guess

459
00:20:10,440 --> 00:20:11,240
Speaker 3: I'm a little bit split.

460
00:20:11,280 --> 00:20:13,280
Speaker 5: Maybe she's just trying to get lit at the party.

461
00:20:13,840 --> 00:20:15,520
Speaker 3: But I just want good cocktails.

462
00:20:15,720 --> 00:20:18,240
Speaker 2: Bring a flask anyway.

463
00:20:18,440 --> 00:20:20,280
Speaker 1: What is the relationship with Jenny and Op I missed

464
00:20:20,280 --> 00:20:23,400
Speaker 1: the beginning. Jenny is the like she seems like she's

465
00:20:23,440 --> 00:20:27,719
Speaker 1: the decorator. Yeah, they just get along like the planner, yeah, which, yeah,

466
00:20:27,800 --> 00:20:30,040
Speaker 1: so that's the only reason, just because I worked in

467
00:20:30,400 --> 00:20:35,600
Speaker 1: like service obviously don't treat people disrespectfully. But I think

468
00:20:35,600 --> 00:20:38,400
Speaker 1: that as someone who worked in it, you just kind

469
00:20:38,400 --> 00:20:41,400
Speaker 1: of it. Put up with a lot you do which

470
00:20:41,440 --> 00:20:43,479
Speaker 1: is not fair. You go and cry in the kitchen

471
00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:44,320
Speaker 1: and you come back.

472
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:45,639
Speaker 3: Yeah. I don't know.

473
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:48,879
Speaker 1: I think that Radish says, it's perfectly professional if you

474
00:20:48,880 --> 00:20:51,200
Speaker 1: feel your client is being hostile. I think it depends.

475
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:52,680
Speaker 1: I think it depends on what she was doing, because

476
00:20:52,720 --> 00:20:55,480
Speaker 1: the slamming the hands would be a lot, and I

477
00:20:55,520 --> 00:20:56,920
Speaker 1: think at that point I'd be like.

478
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:58,760
Speaker 2: No, that's at that point, I'd be like, hey, I'm

479
00:20:58,800 --> 00:20:59,840
Speaker 2: done with this conversation.

480
00:21:00,119 --> 00:21:01,359
Speaker 3: I think that's yeah.

481
00:21:01,560 --> 00:21:04,639
Speaker 5: The mother in law, Yeah, kick her out of the family,

482
00:21:05,040 --> 00:21:05,560
Speaker 5: kick her out.

483
00:21:05,720 --> 00:21:08,000
Speaker 1: Emma fourteen o eight says, I think if you're feeling unsafe,

484
00:21:08,000 --> 00:21:08,880
Speaker 1: it's okay to call it out.

485
00:21:09,000 --> 00:21:09,440
Speaker 2: Yeah.

486
00:21:09,600 --> 00:21:12,040
Speaker 3: I think I wasn't as clear before the slamming of

487
00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:12,800
Speaker 3: the hands.

488
00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:15,200
Speaker 2: Yeah I didn't. It just seemed like she was nosy.

489
00:21:15,400 --> 00:21:18,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, because if it was just her being like,

490
00:21:18,359 --> 00:21:24,159
Speaker 1: oh I want, I want, and that was the only thing.

491
00:21:24,040 --> 00:21:25,359
Speaker 3: That I'd be like, I don't know. If I would

492
00:21:25,359 --> 00:21:25,800
Speaker 3: call that out.

493
00:21:25,840 --> 00:21:28,520
Speaker 1: But if it was the same energy of slamming the

494
00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:31,680
Speaker 1: table and being like you're wrong, Yeah, then I think

495
00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:32,400
Speaker 1: calling it is out.

496
00:21:32,640 --> 00:21:33,200
Speaker 3: It is okay.

497
00:21:33,760 --> 00:21:36,639
Speaker 2: I want to see what happens. I want to know

498
00:21:36,680 --> 00:21:39,879
Speaker 2: where there's more, where fiance comes, what is he doing? Like,

499
00:21:39,920 --> 00:21:40,479
Speaker 2: where is he?

500
00:21:40,960 --> 00:21:41,240
Speaker 1: Yeah?

501
00:21:41,240 --> 00:21:41,760
Speaker 2: Where is he?

502
00:21:42,520 --> 00:21:45,639
Speaker 3: I proceeded to try and fail not to cry.

503
00:21:45,640 --> 00:21:47,640
Speaker 1: Which also sucks because I feel like this is a piece,

504
00:21:47,720 --> 00:21:49,600
Speaker 1: like you should be happy about this. Yeah, you should

505
00:21:49,600 --> 00:21:51,560
Speaker 1: be enjoying it, I know, which is again why I

506
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:53,000
Speaker 1: think that the mother in law should just not have

507
00:21:53,000 --> 00:21:54,200
Speaker 1: been invited to these things.

508
00:21:54,440 --> 00:21:58,200
Speaker 2: Also side note, Yeah, so many brides that I talked

509
00:21:58,200 --> 00:22:01,879
Speaker 2: to or bride to be. Yah, it sounds like wedding

510
00:22:01,920 --> 00:22:02,920
Speaker 2: planning is miserable.

511
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:05,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, you know, it sounds really hard.

512
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:09,320
Speaker 2: It sounds really hard and not fun. Yeah, and I

513
00:22:09,320 --> 00:22:11,880
Speaker 2: feel like it it shouldn't be that way.

514
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:14,119
Speaker 3: Right, Yeah, I think it should be.

515
00:22:14,240 --> 00:22:16,720
Speaker 1: I mean, I think event planning in general is just

516
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:17,919
Speaker 1: really hard, and that's why.

517
00:22:17,800 --> 00:22:20,320
Speaker 2: People try to If you have enough money, you pay someone.

518
00:22:20,119 --> 00:22:23,600
Speaker 3: To do it, to do it for you, yeah.

519
00:22:22,840 --> 00:22:24,520
Speaker 2: Which is a luxury.

520
00:22:24,600 --> 00:22:24,959
Speaker 3: Yeah.

521
00:22:25,040 --> 00:22:26,560
Speaker 1: I think Actually I would love to do a poll

522
00:22:26,680 --> 00:22:29,040
Speaker 1: because I think I'm a little bit split on do

523
00:22:29,160 --> 00:22:31,760
Speaker 1: we think that Jenny should have called her out, because

524
00:22:31,760 --> 00:22:33,800
Speaker 1: I think I've seen some people in the common saying

525
00:22:33,800 --> 00:22:35,879
Speaker 1: she was perfectly right to call her out, and I

526
00:22:35,880 --> 00:22:38,000
Speaker 1: think after the slamming of the hands, I was I

527
00:22:38,040 --> 00:22:38,560
Speaker 1: agree with that.

528
00:22:39,720 --> 00:22:44,840
Speaker 3: But before Jenny, No, should Jenny have called the mother

529
00:22:44,880 --> 00:22:45,120
Speaker 3: in line?

530
00:22:45,119 --> 00:22:46,400
Speaker 2: I said, this is getting really hush.

531
00:22:47,320 --> 00:22:49,320
Speaker 1: Miss silver Tears says, I think Jenny was being very

532
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:51,800
Speaker 1: unprofessional and wasn't doing her job correctly. If you are

533
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:54,280
Speaker 1: in customer service, these things you need to deal with correctly.

534
00:22:54,400 --> 00:22:57,240
Speaker 1: Mother in law was annoying, but that's her job. And

535
00:22:57,240 --> 00:23:00,680
Speaker 1: then Martika Waterman says, yes, monster law, Uh, I should

536
00:23:00,680 --> 00:23:02,840
Speaker 1: have just left the situation. If OP talked to the

537
00:23:03,040 --> 00:23:04,960
Speaker 1: fiance about this and he still didn't want to deal

538
00:23:05,000 --> 00:23:07,440
Speaker 1: with it, than just leave. Yeah, So I think they're

539
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:08,320
Speaker 1: what do we have?

540
00:23:08,359 --> 00:23:09,480
Speaker 3: We have? Yes?

541
00:23:09,760 --> 00:23:12,440
Speaker 1: So far everyone's saying, yes, Jenny should call the mother

542
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:18,240
Speaker 1: in law out. That is actually a great point, Titania.

543
00:23:18,359 --> 00:23:20,880
Speaker 1: Someone should have called mother in law mother in law out,

544
00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:23,320
Speaker 1: but not the wedding planner. That I think is a

545
00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:25,879
Speaker 1: better point that I think someone should have stood up

546
00:23:25,920 --> 00:23:28,560
Speaker 1: for her sooner. Yeah, I think it shouldn't have been

547
00:23:28,640 --> 00:23:30,760
Speaker 1: on Jenny to call out the mother in law.

548
00:23:30,800 --> 00:23:31,840
Speaker 3: No, I think that's a better point.

549
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:39,119
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's it's so tough because I'm trying to think

550
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:43,880
Speaker 4: when someone actually has the strength and confidence to call

551
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:45,640
Speaker 4: out like their partner's parents.

552
00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:49,439
Speaker 2: That's really hard. It is hard, really really hard. And

553
00:23:49,520 --> 00:23:52,879
Speaker 2: I definitely had instances in the past where I had

554
00:23:52,920 --> 00:23:55,879
Speaker 2: to tell someone hey, that makes me uncomfortable instead of

555
00:23:55,960 --> 00:24:01,160
Speaker 2: telling the parent directly. Absolutely, it's really hard. So yeah,

556
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:03,879
Speaker 2: Op should have been like, hey, you know what, like

557
00:24:04,240 --> 00:24:06,920
Speaker 2: I kind of just want to have this conversation about

558
00:24:06,920 --> 00:24:09,600
Speaker 2: the cocktails just with Jenny if that would be okay

559
00:24:09,640 --> 00:24:12,720
Speaker 2: with you. You know, that's really hard.

560
00:24:13,119 --> 00:24:13,760
Speaker 3: It's really hard.

561
00:24:13,840 --> 00:24:16,880
Speaker 1: No, it's absolutely really hard. But I think that, Yeah,

562
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:20,160
Speaker 1: I think it's unfair. I guess I guess what I

563
00:24:20,200 --> 00:24:22,119
Speaker 1: am not realizing is I think that it's unfair that

564
00:24:22,200 --> 00:24:23,440
Speaker 1: Jenny had to call it out.

565
00:24:24,480 --> 00:24:27,119
Speaker 2: The thing is, I don't know if she had to. Yeah,

566
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:29,720
Speaker 2: I think that's what we're asking, right, Did she had to?

567
00:24:31,520 --> 00:24:36,000
Speaker 2: And who knows? If Op and Jenny were talking outside

568
00:24:36,040 --> 00:24:39,720
Speaker 2: of these conversations, maybe Jenny knew how frustrated OPI was.

569
00:24:39,760 --> 00:24:41,760
Speaker 2: Maybe yeah, maybe she was like you know what you're

570
00:24:41,800 --> 00:24:43,399
Speaker 2: doing this to my girl stuff.

571
00:24:43,400 --> 00:24:44,000
Speaker 3: You're done?

572
00:24:44,119 --> 00:24:47,159
Speaker 1: Yeah, done, forty Brady says Jenny should she could have

573
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:49,199
Speaker 1: said it better. The way she said it, from the

574
00:24:49,200 --> 00:24:51,520
Speaker 1: way it's written was very awkward, which can make a

575
00:24:51,560 --> 00:24:53,439
Speaker 1: situation much worse, especially in service.

576
00:24:53,600 --> 00:24:54,280
Speaker 3: That's my thing.

577
00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:56,760
Speaker 1: I think that one way she could have I think

578
00:24:56,800 --> 00:24:59,160
Speaker 1: you kind have said it of like, hey, I think

579
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:00,600
Speaker 1: this is you know, I think we're getting a little

580
00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:03,479
Speaker 1: bit like tensions arising a little bit. Let's take a

581
00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:05,360
Speaker 1: beat and we can come back and look at these later.

582
00:25:05,440 --> 00:25:06,239
Speaker 3: Let's look at something out.

583
00:25:06,640 --> 00:25:08,760
Speaker 2: I wish I could talk, lad. I wish that my

584
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:12,960
Speaker 2: like conflict and resolution skill were like that good.

585
00:25:13,160 --> 00:25:15,800
Speaker 1: Yeah, well mine heart, I just I mean, I guess

586
00:25:15,840 --> 00:25:18,200
Speaker 1: I did a little bit of service, so partially I

587
00:25:18,240 --> 00:25:19,520
Speaker 1: could oh, no good, But.

588
00:25:19,440 --> 00:25:21,760
Speaker 2: At the restaurant I was pretty good because I worked

589
00:25:21,760 --> 00:25:22,880
Speaker 2: in restaurants for Yeah.

590
00:25:22,960 --> 00:25:25,400
Speaker 3: But she is on the job, so this isn't even open.

591
00:25:25,440 --> 00:25:29,080
Speaker 1: I'm saying Jenny, like yeah, So if we are saying

592
00:25:29,160 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 1: Jenny should have called it out, I still think maybe

593
00:25:31,760 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 1: there was a way where she could have done it

594
00:25:33,920 --> 00:25:35,760
Speaker 1: in a little bit of less direct way.

595
00:25:36,520 --> 00:25:40,720
Speaker 2: Yeah again, going, but what everybody's saying, is that, oh wait,

596
00:25:40,760 --> 00:25:43,240
Speaker 2: what's that? The wedding planner is there for the bride

597
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:45,720
Speaker 2: and groom, not anyone else. If the mother in law

598
00:25:45,720 --> 00:25:47,760
Speaker 2: is stepping on toes the planner one hundred percent can

599
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:49,800
Speaker 2: call it out. Yes, she should have called it out.

600
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:53,919
Speaker 2: Op is her client? That is that is an interest?

601
00:25:54,040 --> 00:25:57,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, she certain never had a wedding planner, so they do.

602
00:25:57,640 --> 00:25:59,920
Speaker 1: Maybe they're they're supposed to handle annoying one.

603
00:26:00,440 --> 00:26:02,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, but like she's there for the bride and groom.

604
00:26:02,200 --> 00:26:03,280
Speaker 2: You're right, that's a good point.

605
00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 3: That is a good point.

606
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:05,960
Speaker 1: Maybe it's like the have you seen it, like say

607
00:26:06,000 --> 00:26:07,919
Speaker 1: yes to the dress where the people who are.

608
00:26:07,880 --> 00:26:08,440
Speaker 2: A while ago.

609
00:26:08,560 --> 00:26:09,879
Speaker 1: Yeah, I have to I have to watch a lot

610
00:26:09,920 --> 00:26:12,480
Speaker 1: of those because it's not about Yeah, they would come

611
00:26:12,520 --> 00:26:15,160
Speaker 1: in and they're like, guys, ladies, it's not about you.

612
00:26:15,359 --> 00:26:19,159
Speaker 1: This is the bride's day and you're acting horribly and

613
00:26:19,520 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 1: call them out.

614
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:21,359
Speaker 3: So maybe it's that level.

615
00:26:21,520 --> 00:26:27,040
Speaker 1: Yeah, which, yeah, I'm leaning more into Jenny being in

616
00:26:27,080 --> 00:26:31,240
Speaker 1: the right. But yeah, any more information, Yeah, let's see. Yeah, Oh,

617
00:26:31,600 --> 00:26:33,600
Speaker 1: Jellybill says they can and will be the bad person.

618
00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:37,440
Speaker 1: I proceeded to try and fail not to cry while

619
00:26:37,520 --> 00:26:40,359
Speaker 1: Jenny apologized a million times and said she hopes we

620
00:26:40,400 --> 00:26:42,640
Speaker 1: don't think she was an a hole. She even said

621
00:26:42,680 --> 00:26:44,560
Speaker 1: mother in law could have been stressed from only having

622
00:26:44,640 --> 00:26:46,879
Speaker 1: one hearing aid and struggling to keep things.

623
00:26:46,720 --> 00:26:48,920
Speaker 2: Straight, which is, where's the other hearing aid?

624
00:26:49,000 --> 00:26:49,800
Speaker 3: I think it wasn't working.

625
00:26:49,960 --> 00:26:52,840
Speaker 1: Okay, I think she had it, but it wasn't functional.

626
00:26:53,320 --> 00:26:57,159
Speaker 1: Where Yeah, which again, like that is a frustrating thing

627
00:26:57,200 --> 00:27:01,560
Speaker 1: to go through. Jenny still tried to defend mother in

628
00:27:01,640 --> 00:27:05,320
Speaker 1: law and explain her actions. Once I calmed down, the

629
00:27:05,359 --> 00:27:07,600
Speaker 1: rest of the appointment went smoothly and we actually had

630
00:27:07,640 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 1: a great time. Jenny is like the sister I never had,

631
00:27:10,240 --> 00:27:12,119
Speaker 1: and my fiance was happy to give her advice.

632
00:27:12,480 --> 00:27:14,840
Speaker 3: What is the fiance doing on what dirt bike?

633
00:27:14,920 --> 00:27:15,040
Speaker 4: Then?

634
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:17,560
Speaker 3: Don't like to get her ten year old?

635
00:27:18,520 --> 00:27:19,840
Speaker 2: Has fiance been in this?

636
00:27:20,160 --> 00:27:21,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's been there the whole time.

637
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:25,520
Speaker 2: If my fiance and I were in a conversation and

638
00:27:25,560 --> 00:27:27,640
Speaker 2: their parent was acting like that and they they I'm

639
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:31,000
Speaker 2: telling you, you know, and they didn't say anything, big

640
00:27:31,040 --> 00:27:34,720
Speaker 2: red flag, big red flag, big red flag. Yeah, so red,

641
00:27:35,040 --> 00:27:38,600
Speaker 2: so red, so red, so red, so big, so big.

642
00:27:38,760 --> 00:27:41,800
Speaker 1: The air felt different and so much better. Once they're

643
00:27:41,840 --> 00:27:44,879
Speaker 1: in law left Yeah, maybe this is just the solution.

644
00:27:45,040 --> 00:27:46,120
Speaker 1: This just shouldn't have been there.

645
00:27:46,320 --> 00:27:48,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, let her play shuffle Boy every day.

646
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:49,600
Speaker 3: Shuffle Boy every day.

647
00:27:49,760 --> 00:27:50,600
Speaker 2: Just leave her.

648
00:27:51,000 --> 00:27:53,359
Speaker 1: The next day, she called my fiance and asked him

649
00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:57,600
Speaker 1: to come over so she could talk to him, just him.

650
00:27:57,640 --> 00:28:00,560
Speaker 1: According to him, she insists that Jenny overreacts and was

651
00:28:00,600 --> 00:28:02,879
Speaker 1: the one in the wrong. That the change was sudden

652
00:28:02,920 --> 00:28:06,240
Speaker 1: and she had no idea things were tense. Everyone else

653
00:28:06,280 --> 00:28:08,760
Speaker 1: certainly knew it. We kept exchanging looks and trying to

654
00:28:08,800 --> 00:28:10,879
Speaker 1: move it along. She also told him I hurt her

655
00:28:10,880 --> 00:28:13,399
Speaker 1: feelings when I shut down all of her suggestions, just

656
00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:15,840
Speaker 1: the candle thing in cocktail, and when I told her

657
00:28:15,840 --> 00:28:17,720
Speaker 1: I don't really care for the drink that much. I

658
00:28:17,720 --> 00:28:19,440
Speaker 1: didn't realize it meant that much to her.

659
00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:20,439
Speaker 3: I don't know.

660
00:28:20,720 --> 00:28:22,399
Speaker 1: I feel like it was pretty obvious that she was

661
00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:24,760
Speaker 1: It's like, I'm obsessed with this tree.

662
00:28:24,880 --> 00:28:26,600
Speaker 2: I know, I want to know what drink.

663
00:28:27,000 --> 00:28:28,120
Speaker 3: She was like, it's so good.

664
00:28:28,320 --> 00:28:30,840
Speaker 2: I think if the cocktail was like that good, I

665
00:28:30,880 --> 00:28:31,840
Speaker 2: would just let her have it.

666
00:28:32,040 --> 00:28:34,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, but a piece said that she didn't really like it.

667
00:28:34,440 --> 00:28:35,359
Speaker 2: Oh it's okay.

668
00:28:36,000 --> 00:28:37,879
Speaker 1: My mom pointed it out to me later. And I

669
00:28:37,920 --> 00:28:40,040
Speaker 1: do feel bad for it. I did see it on

670
00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:42,160
Speaker 1: her face when I put my foot down. I think

671
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 1: this was the first time mother in law witnessed me

672
00:28:44,360 --> 00:28:47,240
Speaker 1: take a stand and stick to my guns. I will

673
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:52,680
Speaker 1: apologize after she does. Am I wrong for refusing to apologize?

674
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:52,920
Speaker 2: First?

675
00:28:52,920 --> 00:28:54,360
Speaker 3: Slash offer and olive branch?

676
00:28:54,520 --> 00:28:58,800
Speaker 1: And there is an update which I think that sometimes

677
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 1: I can we have another poll?

678
00:29:00,880 --> 00:29:05,080
Speaker 3: Rilly can we do? Oh? Who is the a hole?

679
00:29:05,200 --> 00:29:05,320
Speaker 4: Oh?

680
00:29:05,400 --> 00:29:07,160
Speaker 3: P you do three?

681
00:29:07,720 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 1: Mother in law? Or everyone sucks here? Jess m says. Also,

682
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:14,080
Speaker 1: when it comes to a wedding as a visitor, your

683
00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:16,000
Speaker 1: suggestions do not need to be taken at all.

684
00:29:16,120 --> 00:29:16,560
Speaker 3: It's true.

685
00:29:17,320 --> 00:29:19,120
Speaker 1: Un he says, this is why I want to just

686
00:29:19,120 --> 00:29:20,680
Speaker 1: e lope and have a party afterwards.

687
00:29:20,960 --> 00:29:23,080
Speaker 2: Would be interesting to know who's paying for it.

688
00:29:23,480 --> 00:29:26,400
Speaker 1: That's true, right, because maybe maybe if the mother in

689
00:29:26,480 --> 00:29:28,800
Speaker 1: law or like the fiance's side is paying more.

690
00:29:29,160 --> 00:29:31,280
Speaker 3: And yeah, like I'm entitled to.

691
00:29:31,600 --> 00:29:33,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, which I don't love.

692
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:35,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't love. But maybe that's her reasoning.

693
00:29:35,760 --> 00:29:40,600
Speaker 1: Yeah, Miss silver Tears says they were both the a hole.

694
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:43,000
Speaker 1: They should not have invited her if they didn't want

695
00:29:43,040 --> 00:29:43,600
Speaker 1: her input.

696
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:47,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, that's is all true. It's true. Queen Deese

697
00:29:47,600 --> 00:29:49,600
Speaker 3: is no one is an a whole interesting.

698
00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:53,600
Speaker 1: I think I think everyone was a little bit of

699
00:29:53,680 --> 00:29:55,280
Speaker 1: the a whole to different degree.

700
00:29:55,920 --> 00:29:57,800
Speaker 3: That's my bond. But if you disagree with me, you

701
00:29:57,840 --> 00:29:58,440
Speaker 3: can say.

702
00:29:58,920 --> 00:30:03,480
Speaker 2: No, it's like not then none of them were like terrible.

703
00:30:03,720 --> 00:30:06,520
Speaker 2: I think this is not to the degree most a

704
00:30:06,760 --> 00:30:11,560
Speaker 2: whole behavior. Maybe, Jenny, that's what's coming to mind for me,

705
00:30:12,160 --> 00:30:18,160
Speaker 2: I think, but why slamming on the hands a whole behavior? Yeah,

706
00:30:18,520 --> 00:30:21,880
Speaker 2: that was, you know, but I think yeah, she felt attacked,

707
00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:24,920
Speaker 2: felt like it was two on one, and was just

708
00:30:24,960 --> 00:30:27,840
Speaker 2: trying to help cares a lot. I think that's what happens,

709
00:30:27,920 --> 00:30:30,400
Speaker 2: is that when you're not open and clear about your

710
00:30:30,440 --> 00:30:35,960
Speaker 2: emotions and people feel blindsided, then they're like, what what.

711
00:30:36,320 --> 00:30:38,000
Speaker 3: You want to hear? Yeah?

712
00:30:38,720 --> 00:30:40,360
Speaker 1: No, I think in the end, but do you agree

713
00:30:40,360 --> 00:30:44,160
Speaker 1: that everyone or do you think Jenny like everyone made mistakes?

714
00:30:44,400 --> 00:30:45,600
Speaker 2: Everyone made I think everyone?

715
00:30:45,680 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, everyone, Yeah, I think it was. I think it

716
00:30:49,040 --> 00:30:51,360
Speaker 1: wasn't like end of the world a whole. I think

717
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:54,440
Speaker 1: it was everyone was making mistakes.

718
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:59,040
Speaker 2: Just just just be real, just be up front, Just

719
00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:00,040
Speaker 2: be upfront.

720
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:02,400
Speaker 3: Don't scoot around the bush and the.

721
00:31:04,400 --> 00:31:05,320
Speaker 2: Big bush and.

722
00:31:06,840 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 3: What's the phrase, oh, Scooter around. I liked scooter around.

723
00:31:15,000 --> 00:31:18,520
Speaker 3: Don't scoot around the moo scoot around it.

724
00:31:19,560 --> 00:31:22,720
Speaker 2: But what was I think this is also where more

725
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 2: open communication between Opie and her fiance. I agree that

726
00:31:26,600 --> 00:31:27,960
Speaker 2: that's what we were missing.

727
00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:28,360
Speaker 3: Yeah.

728
00:31:28,640 --> 00:31:31,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, And little triny Web says, maybe she shouts because

729
00:31:31,760 --> 00:31:33,360
Speaker 1: of her bad hearing. That's what I was thinking of,

730
00:31:33,440 --> 00:31:35,600
Speaker 1: that's what yeah, yeah, which is the only thought.

731
00:31:35,600 --> 00:31:36,920
Speaker 2: It was a little tap, not a VI.

732
00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 3: You don't want me here.

733
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:44,560
Speaker 1: At Yeah, that's the only reason why I was thinking.

734
00:31:44,960 --> 00:31:48,160
Speaker 1: Maybe the mother in law just wasn't realizing what she

735
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:49,120
Speaker 1: was doing, and that's the true.

736
00:31:49,200 --> 00:31:51,080
Speaker 2: And someone was saying, yeah, maybe just mother in law

737
00:31:51,160 --> 00:31:53,240
Speaker 2: is just oblivious, which op says, but yeah, it.

738
00:31:53,200 --> 00:31:54,880
Speaker 3: Seems like she doesn't be those social cues.

739
00:31:54,920 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, which it can be hard when you're trying

740
00:31:56,760 --> 00:32:00,520
Speaker 1: to have a conversation someone who's especially with an outside person.

741
00:32:01,920 --> 00:32:05,440
Speaker 2: I would say, honestly though, like you know, now that

742
00:32:05,480 --> 00:32:07,560
Speaker 2: I'm thinking about it, I would have just given her

743
00:32:07,600 --> 00:32:12,680
Speaker 2: the cocktail. Fine, you know, name it after her, name

744
00:32:12,720 --> 00:32:15,320
Speaker 2: it something you make her feel, and then that way

745
00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:18,120
Speaker 2: you keep going with the wedding cleanning girl, I gave

746
00:32:18,160 --> 00:32:20,440
Speaker 2: you the cocktail. I gave it to you.

747
00:32:20,880 --> 00:32:23,280
Speaker 1: I think that I don't think ope is necessarily wrong,

748
00:32:23,360 --> 00:32:25,920
Speaker 1: but I think I also would have done it, just

749
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,840
Speaker 1: because I'm like, it's a I don't even drink, Like.

750
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:31,200
Speaker 2: Sure, you can let her have it.

751
00:32:32,480 --> 00:32:34,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, but let's get into this little update.

752
00:32:34,960 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 2: We're just cooting around the bush.

753
00:32:40,840 --> 00:32:43,640
Speaker 1: She sent me a birthday card April in the mail,

754
00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:47,760
Speaker 1: saying I'm sorry for how things went down at the venue.

755
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:51,920
Speaker 1: I'm looking forward to a beautiful wedding day, but no

756
00:32:52,120 --> 00:32:56,280
Speaker 1: actual admission of wrongdoing. Okay, got of annoying. I'm still

757
00:32:56,320 --> 00:32:58,240
Speaker 1: mad because I don't but I don't want to cause

758
00:32:58,280 --> 00:33:01,440
Speaker 1: more waves before the wedding. Since two months, but I

759
00:33:01,480 --> 00:33:03,960
Speaker 1: still wonder should I agree to have the drink she

760
00:33:04,000 --> 00:33:06,160
Speaker 1: wanted at my wedding. It's not like it to be

761
00:33:06,280 --> 00:33:08,720
Speaker 1: the only drink there, but I question if it should

762
00:33:08,720 --> 00:33:11,600
Speaker 1: be there at all. I think she should have it,

763
00:33:11,680 --> 00:33:16,120
Speaker 1: but it's like limited, yeah, or like off menu.

764
00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:17,400
Speaker 5: She's like, no, it's there.

765
00:33:17,800 --> 00:33:19,120
Speaker 2: It's like a secret thing you have to ask the

766
00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:20,480
Speaker 2: bartender for exactly.

767
00:33:20,960 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 1: This was about one month after the appointment in April.

768
00:33:24,040 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: Total silence between us. We've been acting like we're over

769
00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:29,480
Speaker 1: it and are letting it go for now. As long

770
00:33:29,520 --> 00:33:31,840
Speaker 1: as she doesn't try to spin what happened or justify

771
00:33:31,840 --> 00:33:34,560
Speaker 1: her behavior. I told my fiance I'm not going to

772
00:33:34,600 --> 00:33:36,800
Speaker 1: let that fly, and we'll call her out if she

773
00:33:36,920 --> 00:33:39,320
Speaker 1: starts it. The appointment was in March and it's been

774
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:42,160
Speaker 1: four months. Am I dragging this out? I know she

775
00:33:42,240 --> 00:33:45,880
Speaker 1: didn't actually take responsibility for her actions, but honestly, I'm

776
00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:48,040
Speaker 1: not sure that I'll ever change if I featured the

777
00:33:48,120 --> 00:33:49,840
Speaker 1: drink she wanted at the wedding, would that be an

778
00:33:49,880 --> 00:33:53,680
Speaker 1: olive branch or a bulldozer? Should I let it go?

779
00:33:54,760 --> 00:33:57,200
Speaker 1: And that is the end of that story?

780
00:33:57,920 --> 00:33:58,320
Speaker 2: Yeah?

781
00:33:58,720 --> 00:34:00,680
Speaker 3: Boy, oh boy. Yeah.

782
00:34:01,000 --> 00:34:03,840
Speaker 1: Josephia Mendolo Berqui says, now, that's kind of an apology.

783
00:34:04,440 --> 00:34:06,200
Speaker 3: Yeah. Would would you take that as.

784
00:34:06,120 --> 00:34:09,120
Speaker 1: An apology if you were sent that I'm sorry of

785
00:34:09,120 --> 00:34:11,600
Speaker 1: how things went down? Or would you expect more?

786
00:34:12,320 --> 00:34:15,759
Speaker 2: See, I would want I would want more in person, Yeah,

787
00:34:15,760 --> 00:34:18,839
Speaker 2: I would want Yeah, because there's more there, Like she's

788
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:21,239
Speaker 2: clearly hurt, she wants to be a part of this.

789
00:34:22,040 --> 00:34:24,360
Speaker 2: It's like a it's an apology, but it's not a

790
00:34:24,520 --> 00:34:28,600
Speaker 2: super direct Yeah, taking accountability.

791
00:34:28,719 --> 00:34:29,759
Speaker 3: I agree. I think that.

792
00:34:30,400 --> 00:34:33,000
Speaker 1: I think that if because we know from the beginning

793
00:34:33,040 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 1: of the story. OPI said that the mother in law

794
00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:37,279
Speaker 1: were and she were close. Yeah, so I think I

795
00:34:37,320 --> 00:34:40,359
Speaker 1: would want that kind of direct hey, because I think

796
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:43,560
Speaker 1: I just I think I just prefer apologies that are.

797
00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:45,959
Speaker 2: I'm sorry for for overstepping.

798
00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:48,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that would have been a little bit more.

799
00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:52,160
Speaker 2: I just really want this freaking cocktail.

800
00:34:54,239 --> 00:34:55,040
Speaker 3: It's so good.

801
00:34:55,120 --> 00:34:59,399
Speaker 1: It's so good. Jan Digital says Opie should just let

802
00:34:59,400 --> 00:35:01,360
Speaker 1: it go. There are more important things for her to

803
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:04,480
Speaker 1: focus her time and energy on. Yeah, it's it's I

804
00:35:04,480 --> 00:35:07,279
Speaker 1: guess it's like this is going to be your mother

805
00:35:07,360 --> 00:35:09,359
Speaker 1: in law or deal with it.

806
00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:09,840
Speaker 4: Yeah.

807
00:35:09,920 --> 00:35:14,080
Speaker 1: So so unfortunately, either you have to confront her now

808
00:35:14,800 --> 00:35:17,239
Speaker 1: or yeah, if you're not, then you kind of have

809
00:35:17,280 --> 00:35:17,799
Speaker 1: to deal with it.

810
00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:22,719
Speaker 2: And also, I feel like it doesn't sound like it's

811
00:35:22,719 --> 00:35:24,480
Speaker 2: one thing if there's a track record of the mother

812
00:35:24,520 --> 00:35:27,360
Speaker 2: in law really like meddling in the relationship. Yeah, you know,

813
00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:30,040
Speaker 2: but like you said, they had a good relationship. I

814
00:35:30,080 --> 00:35:34,239
Speaker 2: think just the wedding planning, like we said, stressful, stressful.

815
00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:34,800
Speaker 3: Uh.

816
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:37,480
Speaker 1: Lena Covenant says, that's a narcissist apology.

817
00:35:37,680 --> 00:35:39,840
Speaker 2: She did have some narcissistic tendencies.

818
00:35:39,840 --> 00:35:42,680
Speaker 1: It sounded like she wanted it a lot of the

819
00:35:42,680 --> 00:35:43,840
Speaker 1: wedding to be about herself.

820
00:35:44,040 --> 00:35:46,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah uh.

821
00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:48,200
Speaker 1: And Heleanna Bain says, sometimes you need to talk it

822
00:35:48,239 --> 00:35:51,600
Speaker 1: out to understand your fault in the matter. And maybe

823
00:35:51,600 --> 00:35:53,799
Speaker 1: what Op needs for herself is to go to her

824
00:35:53,800 --> 00:35:55,040
Speaker 1: mother in law and say, hey, like, I want to

825
00:35:55,040 --> 00:35:55,800
Speaker 1: talk about this further.

826
00:35:56,080 --> 00:35:58,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, like I feel like I deserved a little bit more.

827
00:35:58,360 --> 00:36:00,360
Speaker 2: And that's what I was going to say. Too. Scary.

828
00:36:00,480 --> 00:36:02,560
Speaker 2: We get so caught up in will they owe me

829
00:36:02,600 --> 00:36:05,160
Speaker 2: an apology? I don't you know. It's like if you

830
00:36:05,160 --> 00:36:07,040
Speaker 2: want to talk to someone, talk to someone, and if

831
00:36:07,080 --> 00:36:10,720
Speaker 2: you feel sorry about something or like maybe you don't,

832
00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:13,640
Speaker 2: but you still. I've apologized so many times when I

833
00:36:14,239 --> 00:36:16,919
Speaker 2: didn't really I feel like I did something wrong.

834
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:19,400
Speaker 1: I've done the same thing because I'm like, you know what,

835
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:20,680
Speaker 1: it's not worth it.

836
00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:21,799
Speaker 3: It's not it's not worth it.

837
00:36:21,760 --> 00:36:23,880
Speaker 1: Because I still, you know, you know, if it's my

838
00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:26,319
Speaker 1: friend or something or a family, like I still love them.

839
00:36:26,360 --> 00:36:29,960
Speaker 1: So yeah, this is not this is not the end.

840
00:36:30,560 --> 00:36:32,680
Speaker 1: I'm not going to make this a big thing. No, yeah,

841
00:36:32,920 --> 00:36:33,480
Speaker 1: I agree.

842
00:36:33,520 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 2: Sometimes, Yeah, I hope the wedding was fun. I hope

843
00:36:37,000 --> 00:36:39,319
Speaker 2: they all just got super drunk and like I loved

844
00:36:39,360 --> 00:36:39,719
Speaker 2: each other.

845
00:36:40,080 --> 00:36:42,600
Speaker 3: Super I hope there was some shuffle board going on.

846
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:49,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, but that is the end of that story. Uh

847
00:36:49,280 --> 00:36:53,600
Speaker 1: and now it's time or another story. Nice for you

848
00:36:53,680 --> 00:36:54,640
Speaker 1: to read another story.

849
00:36:55,040 --> 00:36:59,440
Speaker 2: Believe this one isn't as sad am I the a

850
00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:01,640
Speaker 2: hole for getting angry at my mother in law for

851
00:37:01,760 --> 00:37:06,680
Speaker 2: ruining my first time mom experience. Yeah, how do you

852
00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:10,520
Speaker 2: deal with a bad mother in law? So material active

853
00:37:10,719 --> 00:37:13,840
Speaker 2: five seven seventy five says not sure if this is

854
00:37:13,880 --> 00:37:17,040
Speaker 2: a am I the a hole? Or in off my chest?

855
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:21,040
Speaker 2: But yeah, here goes the backstories. When my mother in

856
00:37:21,160 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 2: law had my partner, she wouldn't allow any of her

857
00:37:23,600 --> 00:37:26,280
Speaker 2: in laws to meet the baby because my partner's granddad

858
00:37:26,320 --> 00:37:29,080
Speaker 2: was a violent man when he was drunk. This does

859
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:30,000
Speaker 2: not sound like we're.

860
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:34,640
Speaker 3: Off to a good start. Oh sorry, I'm so sorry.

861
00:37:35,280 --> 00:37:37,359
Speaker 3: I don't think this one is. Yeah.

862
00:37:37,440 --> 00:37:38,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's get.

863
00:37:38,280 --> 00:37:39,680
Speaker 3: Some comedy up in here. Guys.

864
00:37:40,239 --> 00:37:43,160
Speaker 2: Fast forward to when she finally allowed them after years,

865
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:47,040
Speaker 2: Their nana became their favorite person. She was a lovely woman.

866
00:37:47,320 --> 00:37:49,360
Speaker 2: This is important to get an idea of her character.

867
00:37:50,040 --> 00:37:52,280
Speaker 2: When I found out I was pregnant, there were issues

868
00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:54,120
Speaker 2: with our housing, so we had to move in with

869
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:56,680
Speaker 2: one of my parents, one of our parents. We decided

870
00:37:56,680 --> 00:37:58,560
Speaker 2: to move into my in laws because they had always

871
00:37:58,560 --> 00:38:00,640
Speaker 2: given us space and it seemed like the better option.

872
00:38:01,040 --> 00:38:02,600
Speaker 2: They were happy to have us, and I got on

873
00:38:02,680 --> 00:38:06,640
Speaker 2: well with my in laws. Okay, this is great. I

874
00:38:06,680 --> 00:38:09,000
Speaker 2: gave birth to my first baby on the thirteenth of May.

875
00:38:09,440 --> 00:38:11,319
Speaker 2: The birth was a positive one, but I still had

876
00:38:11,320 --> 00:38:15,120
Speaker 2: minor complications and the healing process was a long one. However,

877
00:38:15,239 --> 00:38:17,680
Speaker 2: I was discharged that same day because I thought healing

878
00:38:17,719 --> 00:38:19,879
Speaker 2: at home would be better. I had made it clear

879
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:21,840
Speaker 2: I didn't really want any visitors for at least the

880
00:38:21,840 --> 00:38:25,680
Speaker 2: first week, as private family time means a lot to me. However,

881
00:38:25,760 --> 00:38:27,719
Speaker 2: since my in laws would be meeting her when we

882
00:38:27,800 --> 00:38:29,920
Speaker 2: got home, I thought I would get all the visits

883
00:38:29,920 --> 00:38:32,120
Speaker 2: done within the first week so I could relax from

884
00:38:32,160 --> 00:38:35,960
Speaker 2: there on. Okay, that makes sense. Just allow people to

885
00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:37,759
Speaker 2: pop by when they were free, and then I could

886
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 2: have the second week to relax and spend time with

887
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:42,840
Speaker 2: my baby. The day I arrived back with my baby,

888
00:38:42,920 --> 00:38:44,680
Speaker 2: my mother in law came straight to the door and

889
00:38:44,719 --> 00:38:46,920
Speaker 2: wanted to hold her. Of course, I could see her

890
00:38:47,000 --> 00:38:50,840
Speaker 2: excitement and gave her my baby. She then said to

891
00:38:50,880 --> 00:38:53,239
Speaker 2: the baby, are you coming with grandma to meet my

892
00:38:53,320 --> 00:38:54,400
Speaker 2: friends next Monday.

893
00:38:54,520 --> 00:38:56,560
Speaker 3: What she just brought her home.

894
00:38:56,640 --> 00:38:58,799
Speaker 2: She just brought her home a yet fresh baby. That's

895
00:38:58,840 --> 00:39:02,320
Speaker 2: a fresh baby, rush out of the woop. Oh my gosh, grandma,

896
00:39:02,360 --> 00:39:03,759
Speaker 2: come on, come down, grandma.

897
00:39:04,120 --> 00:39:09,680
Speaker 1: Grandma, slow the roller she was she was stop scooting

898
00:39:09,719 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 1: around the bush croup.

899
00:39:11,640 --> 00:39:14,080
Speaker 2: She was basically asking if she could take the baby

900
00:39:14,080 --> 00:39:16,320
Speaker 2: out to meet her friends, who she was had lunch

901
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:21,640
Speaker 2: with once a week. Firstly, baby is breastfed, so no. Secondly,

902
00:39:21,840 --> 00:39:24,120
Speaker 2: please give me some time to meet my baby first

903
00:39:24,160 --> 00:39:26,600
Speaker 2: before you start showing her around like a toy, like

904
00:39:27,320 --> 00:39:27,760
Speaker 2: a baby.

905
00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:28,120
Speaker 5: I know.

906
00:39:28,480 --> 00:39:31,440
Speaker 2: It was all downhill from there. She then got angry

907
00:39:31,520 --> 00:39:34,000
Speaker 2: because she wanted me to come to watch a rugby

908
00:39:34,000 --> 00:39:38,000
Speaker 2: match that weekend four days postpartum. Whoa why are you

909
00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:42,319
Speaker 2: asking someone four days postpartum to do anything like they're

910
00:39:42,360 --> 00:39:43,080
Speaker 2: like shuffleboard.

911
00:39:43,200 --> 00:39:44,080
Speaker 3: It's shuffle.

912
00:39:45,480 --> 00:39:47,760
Speaker 5: That's a pretty aggressive sport to watch after.

913
00:39:49,400 --> 00:39:49,640
Speaker 2: Yeah.

914
00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:54,359
Speaker 3: Wow, only seen in women's rugby. Yeah that's good.

915
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:56,360
Speaker 2: All of it is hot. I feel like it is

916
00:39:56,560 --> 00:39:57,160
Speaker 2: big legs.

917
00:39:57,360 --> 00:39:58,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, they're so strong.

918
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:00,640
Speaker 5: Yeah Australia in football.

919
00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:02,800
Speaker 2: Oh yeah is that rugby?

920
00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:06,040
Speaker 3: It's well they have and then they have football.

921
00:40:06,640 --> 00:40:09,879
Speaker 5: Australian football is yeah, I got both there.

922
00:40:09,920 --> 00:40:10,239
Speaker 3: I love it.

923
00:40:10,840 --> 00:40:12,239
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go home tonight and watch that.

924
00:40:16,040 --> 00:40:17,000
Speaker 3: Light some candles.

925
00:40:18,800 --> 00:40:20,399
Speaker 2: She wanted me to come to watch a rugby match

926
00:40:20,440 --> 00:40:22,560
Speaker 2: that weekend to show off the baby, but I didn't

927
00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:24,200
Speaker 2: feel up to it and I didn't really want to go.

928
00:40:24,880 --> 00:40:27,719
Speaker 2: I went anyway because I'm a people pleaser, and to

929
00:40:27,800 --> 00:40:30,239
Speaker 2: be honest, I was so hormonal. I thought I was

930
00:40:30,280 --> 00:40:31,759
Speaker 2: probably being the irrational one.

931
00:40:31,880 --> 00:40:33,120
Speaker 3: I want to see people don't like.

932
00:40:34,680 --> 00:40:37,000
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. So I did everything she wanted me

933
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:39,160
Speaker 2: to do. For a long time, I didn't trust my

934
00:40:39,200 --> 00:40:42,120
Speaker 2: own judgments, knowing how hormonal I was. And when my

935
00:40:42,200 --> 00:40:43,840
Speaker 2: mother in law gave birth, she had to stay in

936
00:40:43,880 --> 00:40:46,480
Speaker 2: the hospital for ten days and complained that she had

937
00:40:46,520 --> 00:40:48,560
Speaker 2: to go into all these on the way back, all

938
00:40:48,600 --> 00:40:50,080
Speaker 2: the grocery.

939
00:40:50,840 --> 00:40:53,600
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, I think this is in Australia. I think, actually, yeah,

940
00:40:53,680 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 3: it's definitely not here in Australia.

941
00:40:56,400 --> 00:40:58,600
Speaker 2: Yet she expected me to run around after her the

942
00:40:58,719 --> 00:41:02,360
Speaker 2: day I gave birth. My mother in law never offered

943
00:41:02,400 --> 00:41:05,120
Speaker 2: to help me with anything, never offered to make me

944
00:41:05,200 --> 00:41:08,520
Speaker 2: a drink, make me food, et cetera. Only ever put

945
00:41:08,560 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 2: some of my clothes in the wash when she was

946
00:41:10,040 --> 00:41:13,759
Speaker 2: putting a big wash in. I'm not gonna help you

947
00:41:13,840 --> 00:41:15,480
Speaker 2: with anything, but I'm doing some laundry. You want me

948
00:41:15,520 --> 00:41:19,879
Speaker 2: to throw some of your clothes in. In terms of recovering, again,

949
00:41:20,280 --> 00:41:22,600
Speaker 2: never cared about how I was doing, And the closest

950
00:41:22,640 --> 00:41:24,640
Speaker 2: thing she got to caring was asking me if I'd

951
00:41:24,680 --> 00:41:27,160
Speaker 2: stopped bleeding Yetikes.

952
00:41:27,320 --> 00:41:30,680
Speaker 3: This mother in law sounds is bad. Yeah, very very bad.

953
00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:35,040
Speaker 2: Oh, that's so frustrating. I can't imagine having a kid

954
00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:36,040
Speaker 2: and then people being on you.

955
00:41:37,440 --> 00:41:37,600
Speaker 5: Yeah.

956
00:41:40,280 --> 00:41:42,320
Speaker 2: Every single week she asked if she could take the

957
00:41:42,360 --> 00:41:44,920
Speaker 2: baby to see her friends. The day I gave in

958
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 2: and took the baby to meet her friends, the baby

959
00:41:47,239 --> 00:41:49,919
Speaker 2: was sound asleep asleep in her pram, and she spent

960
00:41:50,000 --> 00:41:52,600
Speaker 2: the whole time standing over the pram trying to subtly

961
00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:55,800
Speaker 2: wake her, shouting her name and shaking her hand.

962
00:41:55,960 --> 00:41:57,080
Speaker 3: Oh my god, this feels well.

963
00:41:57,239 --> 00:41:59,080
Speaker 1: You know what Harry Potter in the first movie when

964
00:41:59,239 --> 00:42:03,800
Speaker 1: uh Dudley when he like taps the snake enclosure and he's.

965
00:42:03,680 --> 00:42:08,920
Speaker 2: Like move Like, why would I don't? Which it's been

966
00:42:08,960 --> 00:42:10,960
Speaker 2: a minute, guys, it's been a minute since I've seen

967
00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:11,359
Speaker 2: that movie.

968
00:42:11,840 --> 00:42:15,040
Speaker 3: But that is so frustrating. Oh my gosh, she's not

969
00:42:15,120 --> 00:42:16,960
Speaker 3: a baby. Let it sleep.

970
00:42:17,200 --> 00:42:20,640
Speaker 2: That's terrible, man. Yeah, and Obi says I didn't want

971
00:42:20,640 --> 00:42:22,600
Speaker 2: to wake her, knowing she would cry to be fed

972
00:42:22,680 --> 00:42:24,399
Speaker 2: and it would mean her friends wouldn't get to see

973
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:24,960
Speaker 2: her at all.

974
00:42:25,280 --> 00:42:27,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, my baby had hadn't even.

975
00:42:27,000 --> 00:42:28,560
Speaker 2: Met my friends at this point.

976
00:42:29,280 --> 00:42:29,320
Speaker 4: What.

977
00:42:30,520 --> 00:42:31,120
Speaker 3: Oh Yi.

978
00:42:31,840 --> 00:42:34,200
Speaker 2: I'm currently eight weeks postpartum, and for the full eight

979
00:42:34,239 --> 00:42:37,000
Speaker 2: weeks she's had to hold the baby every single day.

980
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:40,759
Speaker 2: She follows me around the house and lingers when I'm

981
00:42:40,760 --> 00:42:42,799
Speaker 2: trying to spend time with my baby and look after her,

982
00:42:43,160 --> 00:42:46,480
Speaker 2: especially when baby needs mummy time and comfort from me.

983
00:42:47,320 --> 00:42:52,520
Speaker 2: Witching hour is a thing. She's never cleaned and happy

984
00:42:52,920 --> 00:42:56,799
Speaker 2: or helped with the difficult parts either. She refuses see

985
00:42:57,480 --> 00:43:01,080
Speaker 2: that at least I know that when I, if I

986
00:43:01,160 --> 00:43:03,520
Speaker 2: have kids, Yeah, my mom will be down to help

987
00:43:03,560 --> 00:43:05,759
Speaker 2: with all of that. Yeah. And to have someone who

988
00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:06,839
Speaker 2: so wants.

989
00:43:06,600 --> 00:43:10,280
Speaker 1: To be holding the baby and herself and everything except

990
00:43:10,360 --> 00:43:11,360
Speaker 1: for actually helping you.

991
00:43:11,560 --> 00:43:12,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah.

992
00:43:12,560 --> 00:43:14,000
Speaker 3: No, it's like she just sees this as like a

993
00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:15,480
Speaker 3: doll I know she can play with.

994
00:43:16,440 --> 00:43:18,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, she refuses the times I let her hold my

995
00:43:18,760 --> 00:43:20,840
Speaker 2: baby and baby starts to cry to be fed. She

996
00:43:20,960 --> 00:43:23,360
Speaker 2: refuses to give her back and walks away from me

997
00:43:23,400 --> 00:43:26,279
Speaker 2: when I come to get her. She's like, it's like

998
00:43:26,320 --> 00:43:30,600
Speaker 2: a mini kidnapping of the baby. Another issue is she

999
00:43:30,760 --> 00:43:34,200
Speaker 2: always talks to the baby rather than me.

1000
00:43:34,960 --> 00:43:37,480
Speaker 3: Oh lord, I love that.

1001
00:43:37,840 --> 00:43:41,239
Speaker 2: Oh my god. She shouts the baby's name continuously as

1002
00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:44,440
Speaker 2: well as are you coming to grandma? Until I give

1003
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:46,680
Speaker 2: the baby to her. If she wants to spend the

1004
00:43:46,760 --> 00:43:48,839
Speaker 2: day with the baby, she'll ask the baby if she's

1005
00:43:48,920 --> 00:43:53,400
Speaker 2: going out with her, rather than asking me if we're free. Okay.

1006
00:43:53,920 --> 00:43:57,160
Speaker 2: Can you imagine if someone did this with like your dog? Yeah?

1007
00:43:58,000 --> 00:43:59,360
Speaker 3: Like, are you gonna.

1008
00:44:03,320 --> 00:44:05,959
Speaker 2: This? Does not seem mother in law seems a little

1009
00:44:06,000 --> 00:44:06,560
Speaker 2: bit wacky.

1010
00:44:07,120 --> 00:44:07,359
Speaker 3: Yep.

1011
00:44:07,880 --> 00:44:09,879
Speaker 2: I get awkward, not knowing if I need a reply

1012
00:44:10,080 --> 00:44:14,000
Speaker 2: for the baby or not. I've put boundaries in place

1013
00:44:14,080 --> 00:44:16,480
Speaker 2: that never get respected, and I just feel smothered and

1014
00:44:16,640 --> 00:44:17,960
Speaker 2: constantly on edge around the.

1015
00:44:17,960 --> 00:44:19,240
Speaker 3: House for clarity.

1016
00:44:19,960 --> 00:44:21,879
Speaker 1: So the mother in law is currently staying with them,

1017
00:44:22,160 --> 00:44:24,480
Speaker 1: they're staying with They're staying with the mother with the

1018
00:44:24,520 --> 00:44:25,200
Speaker 1: mother in law got you?

1019
00:44:25,280 --> 00:44:25,520
Speaker 2: Okay?

1020
00:44:25,600 --> 00:44:26,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, thank you?

1021
00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:28,320
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, never do that.

1022
00:44:31,520 --> 00:44:33,400
Speaker 3: She's not gonna help out now I know.

1023
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:37,200
Speaker 2: And once again, where is fiance? Where is he where

1024
00:44:37,320 --> 00:44:40,440
Speaker 2: is he is? We can never find that guy. Worry

1025
00:44:40,520 --> 00:44:42,440
Speaker 2: she's gonna come and start trying to take the baby

1026
00:44:42,480 --> 00:44:44,840
Speaker 2: away if she knows we're there, or and or await,

1027
00:44:45,280 --> 00:44:47,839
Speaker 2: and I've not been able to enjoy my firstborn. I've

1028
00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:49,920
Speaker 2: also felt unable to be firm and tell her it

1029
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:53,280
Speaker 2: upsets me as I'm living under her roof. Her behaviors

1030
00:44:53,320 --> 00:44:55,959
Speaker 2: are even worse when my partner isn't around, which tells

1031
00:44:56,000 --> 00:45:00,160
Speaker 2: me she's aware of what she's doing. Okay, that it's

1032
00:45:00,200 --> 00:45:04,360
Speaker 2: not good again manipulative and she's just like, yeah, what

1033
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:06,920
Speaker 2: are you talking about? Oh? I've been told I should

1034
00:45:06,960 --> 00:45:09,880
Speaker 2: understand that she's just excited about having a granddaughter, but

1035
00:45:09,960 --> 00:45:12,080
Speaker 2: it's been eight weeks now and I still have no

1036
00:45:12,200 --> 00:45:15,279
Speaker 2: space to be with my baby without interruption. It rings

1037
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:17,319
Speaker 2: alarm bells to me that she refused to let her

1038
00:45:17,360 --> 00:45:19,640
Speaker 2: in laws meet her babies, and this is how she

1039
00:45:19,760 --> 00:45:24,280
Speaker 2: acts with mine. She even bitch about my partner's nanna

1040
00:45:24,480 --> 00:45:26,719
Speaker 2: because she also wanted to bring her friends to meet

1041
00:45:26,760 --> 00:45:29,120
Speaker 2: the baby, and my mother in law wasn't happy about it.

1042
00:45:29,560 --> 00:45:31,800
Speaker 2: This is exactly what she did to me and still

1043
00:45:31,880 --> 00:45:35,480
Speaker 2: continues to do. There's so much more, but it's hard

1044
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:37,680
Speaker 2: to fit it all into a single post. I kind

1045
00:45:37,719 --> 00:45:40,560
Speaker 2: of just want some advice an FYI, my partner is

1046
00:45:40,600 --> 00:45:42,520
Speaker 2: aware of this, and we're trying to buy our own

1047
00:45:42,600 --> 00:45:46,960
Speaker 2: house asap. Great, but unfortunately these things take time.

1048
00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,560
Speaker 1: Okay, So the issue is that they do need to

1049
00:45:49,640 --> 00:45:53,440
Speaker 1: stay with her financially probably, yeah, which makes it really difficult.

1050
00:45:53,600 --> 00:45:59,120
Speaker 2: Yeah. I just again, I've never had a baby, but

1051
00:46:01,040 --> 00:46:04,160
Speaker 2: but I can imagine it is just such a stressful

1052
00:46:04,560 --> 00:46:09,000
Speaker 2: and tiring experience. And to have someone on you like that.

1053
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:14,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, when you're trying to like spend those first connection yeah, yeah,

1054
00:46:14,480 --> 00:46:15,960
Speaker 1: those first week's bond. Yeah, exactly.

1055
00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:16,799
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1056
00:46:17,200 --> 00:46:17,239
Speaker 4: No.

1057
00:46:17,480 --> 00:46:19,000
Speaker 1: And the question of this is again, how do you

1058
00:46:19,080 --> 00:46:20,560
Speaker 1: deal with the bad mother in law? And I think

1059
00:46:20,640 --> 00:46:27,239
Speaker 1: that the fiance her son should be more active and saying, hey,

1060
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:30,800
Speaker 1: you can't be doing that. Yeah, but I think maybe

1061
00:46:30,920 --> 00:46:33,279
Speaker 1: the only if this is her behavior, maybe the only

1062
00:46:33,360 --> 00:46:36,440
Speaker 1: solution they just have to wait they move out, which sucks.

1063
00:46:36,560 --> 00:46:39,600
Speaker 2: I know, move out, but also yeah, I think fiance

1064
00:46:39,760 --> 00:46:43,439
Speaker 2: needs to be like, hey, yeah, you need to back

1065
00:46:43,520 --> 00:46:44,680
Speaker 2: off in a nice way.

1066
00:46:45,719 --> 00:46:48,319
Speaker 1: I would you know if you were maybe just saying

1067
00:46:48,360 --> 00:46:49,839
Speaker 1: like you need to help a little bit more if

1068
00:46:49,880 --> 00:46:52,680
Speaker 1: you want that time if you want the baby time. Yeah,

1069
00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:56,800
Speaker 1: but I'll put in this yeah yeah yeah, and not

1070
00:46:57,000 --> 00:47:00,279
Speaker 1: just as as he said, boundaries, they have not clarify that.

1071
00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:03,239
Speaker 1: It doesn't seem that way. It seems like he knows

1072
00:47:03,320 --> 00:47:08,399
Speaker 1: about it about her behavior. But yeah, it's tough because

1073
00:47:08,440 --> 00:47:10,200
Speaker 1: they can't they they can't. It doesn't seem like they

1074
00:47:10,200 --> 00:47:13,399
Speaker 1: can leave because they're saving that, which sucks. Yeah, when

1075
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:14,600
Speaker 1: you're stuck in that situation.

1076
00:47:15,520 --> 00:47:17,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, bummer.

1077
00:47:18,800 --> 00:47:20,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so hard. I have no idea if i'd

1078
00:47:21,040 --> 00:47:22,920
Speaker 2: be like not wanting my mom in law to be

1079
00:47:23,000 --> 00:47:25,200
Speaker 2: with the baby or being like, ah, this is exhausting,

1080
00:47:25,320 --> 00:47:28,440
Speaker 2: take it every second. Yeah, yeah, I.

1081
00:47:28,440 --> 00:47:31,879
Speaker 1: Guess it's the behavior, but it's like it's not even

1082
00:47:31,960 --> 00:47:36,080
Speaker 1: relieving her of exactly that exhaustion or you know, relieving

1083
00:47:36,120 --> 00:47:39,360
Speaker 1: her of that everything that she has to do for

1084
00:47:39,400 --> 00:47:41,960
Speaker 1: the baby. It's literally just taking her when it's when

1085
00:47:42,000 --> 00:47:46,840
Speaker 1: it works for convenient. Yeah, Kai Yoki Mori does the

1086
00:47:46,920 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 1: fiance needs to be more stern and throw a fit

1087
00:47:49,760 --> 00:47:51,840
Speaker 1: for his wife if it's not working.

1088
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:52,279
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1089
00:47:52,840 --> 00:47:53,040
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1090
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:55,919
Speaker 1: Brown Eyed Chick says it sounds like she only acts

1091
00:47:56,000 --> 00:47:57,800
Speaker 1: like that when he's not around, so it's hard to

1092
00:47:57,880 --> 00:48:00,840
Speaker 1: blame him or sure, but I still think that he

1093
00:48:00,920 --> 00:48:02,560
Speaker 1: could go to her and say, hey, like, my wife

1094
00:48:02,640 --> 00:48:05,160
Speaker 1: is a little bit uncomfortable about how you know, you're

1095
00:48:05,239 --> 00:48:08,400
Speaker 1: interacting with the baby. If we could just yeah, I

1096
00:48:08,480 --> 00:48:10,759
Speaker 1: think you could still do that. But that's the end

1097
00:48:10,800 --> 00:48:14,200
Speaker 1: of that story. Snatched that back from you.

1098
00:48:14,520 --> 00:48:17,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel like that's the wild thing about like

1099
00:48:17,640 --> 00:48:20,120
Speaker 2: a long term partner marriage is just like if you

1100
00:48:20,239 --> 00:48:21,640
Speaker 2: vibe with their parents.

1101
00:48:21,320 --> 00:48:23,640
Speaker 3: Are not, Yeah, it's tough.

1102
00:48:23,960 --> 00:48:26,920
Speaker 2: You marry the family too, yeah, you know, because it's.

1103
00:48:26,719 --> 00:48:29,959
Speaker 1: Tough, especially because you I mean usually you don't see

1104
00:48:30,000 --> 00:48:33,560
Speaker 1: you don't meet your like your partner's parents right away.

1105
00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:37,920
Speaker 5: No, wait, when when is he expected? Or like how

1106
00:48:38,000 --> 00:48:40,239
Speaker 5: long is it in a relationship where you like you

1107
00:48:40,320 --> 00:48:42,640
Speaker 5: haven't met them in six months? That's a problem.

1108
00:48:43,640 --> 00:48:49,400
Speaker 2: I think it varies depends. Yeah, I would say I

1109
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Speaker 2: would go like four to six in the four to

1110
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Speaker 2: six months.

1111
00:48:52,239 --> 00:48:56,239
Speaker 1: Yeah, if you haven't met them around range. Yeah, but

1112
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Speaker 1: also the relationship with their parents too.

1113
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Speaker 2: Yeah. And also so some people decide to define relationships

1114
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Speaker 2: on a different timeline. I feel like some people they'll

1115
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Speaker 2: date for a month and then they're like we're together,

1116
00:49:09,239 --> 00:49:10,799
Speaker 2: And some people will be like, no, I need at

1117
00:49:10,840 --> 00:49:13,560
Speaker 2: least six months of dating, and then they're why are

1118
00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:14,040
Speaker 2: you laughing?

1119
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Speaker 4: No?

1120
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Speaker 3: No, I agree, I agree, I agree, I agree, that's funny.

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Speaker 2: Nothing tell us about your personal life, what's going on, Oh,

1122
00:49:25,080 --> 00:49:25,800
Speaker 2: something's going on.

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Speaker 3: Guys can just get really ready for fine,