Speaker 1: Hey everyone, It's Jay Sheddy and I'm thrilled to announce
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Speaker 1: experience On Purpose in person. Join me in a city
Speaker 1: near you for meaningful, insightful conversations with surprise guests. It
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Speaker 1: or business leader. We'll dive into experiences designed to experience growth,
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Speaker 1: meet you. There are a limited number of VIP experiences
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Speaker 1: Head to Jsheddy, dop me Forward, Slash Tour and get
Speaker 1: yours today. You're not responsible for someone's insecurity. You can't
Speaker 1: fix what's broken inside them. That's their work to do.
Speaker 1: You're not responsible for their unrealistic expectations. You decide your limits,
Speaker 1: not their impossible standards. You're not responsible for their misplaced anger.
Speaker 1: The reaction isn't your fault. Don't hold on to guilt
Speaker 1: that isn't yours. The number one health and wellness podcast.
Speaker 2: Jay Shetty Jay Sheddy, Hey everyone, welcome back to On
Speaker 2: Purpose the place you come to listen, learn and grow.
Speaker 1: I'm your host, Jay Sheddy, and today we're talking about
Speaker 1: the things you're not responsible for. I don't know about you,
Speaker 1: but I feel like we all carry and feel responsible
Speaker 1: for more than we can hold. Sometimes the weight feels
Speaker 1: so heavy, and we're trying to carry our parents' expectations,
Speaker 1: We're trying to carry the responsibilities that we have on
Speaker 1: a day to day basis. We're trying to carry people's
Speaker 1: emotions and feelings and pain, and it can often feel
Speaker 1: like it's just weighing so heavy, and at the end
Speaker 1: of trying to carry all of this, you just feel
Speaker 1: like falling and breaking down. I'm sure you felt the
Speaker 1: same way, where you feel like the weight you're carrying
Speaker 1: is getting heavier every single year. And the weight of
Speaker 1: people's expectations, opinions, obligations, whatever it may be, never ever stops.
Speaker 1: In fact, it just continues to grow and accelerate as
Speaker 1: time goes on. As you listen to this episode today,
Speaker 1: I want it to be freeing. I want you to
Speaker 1: feel lighter, I want you to feel liberated. As you
Speaker 1: listen to this episode, I want you to feel like
Speaker 1: you can actually move and think and have space to create,
Speaker 1: because what we don't realize is when we feel responsible
Speaker 1: for things that we don't need to be responsible for,
Speaker 1: we are blocked. Our creativity is blocked, our passions are blocked,
Speaker 1: our time is blocked. So much of our intuition is
Speaker 1: blocked because we're making space and room for everything else.
Speaker 1: So the first thing that I want to talk about,
Speaker 1: the first thing you're not responsible for is other people's feelings.
Speaker 1: You can respect them, but their emotional reactions aren't yours
Speaker 1: to carry or fix. You can be kind to people,
Speaker 1: but people will still feel hurt. You can be present
Speaker 1: with people, but they can still feel distant. You can
Speaker 1: be thoughtful, but people will still feel unheard. You are
Speaker 1: not responsible for other people's feelings. I remember being that
Speaker 1: person where I would overanalyze every text, every email, every message,
Speaker 1: every interaction to say things perfectly, to say things in
Speaker 1: a way that there would be no opportunity for misinterpretation
Speaker 1: or fall out. And guess what, people were still upset.
Speaker 1: People were still hurt. Not because I wanted them to
Speaker 1: be hurt, if anything, I was trying to avoid that.
Speaker 1: But I found that I'm not responsible for other people's feelings.
Speaker 1: If someone wants to be hurt, they'll be hurt no
Speaker 1: matter what you say. If someone wants to be mad
Speaker 1: at you, they'll be mad at you no matter what
Speaker 1: you say. If someone wants to feel upset with you,
Speaker 1: they'll feel upset with you no matter what you say
Speaker 1: or do. If someone has made their mind up about
Speaker 1: how they feel about you, there is nothing you can
Speaker 1: do to fix it. You can be kind, you can
Speaker 1: be respectful, you can try, but you can't be responsible
Speaker 1: for their feelings. Because why if you're responsible for their feelings,
Speaker 1: your time, your energy starts to follow theirs. If they're
Speaker 1: in a good mood, you're in a good mood. If
Speaker 1: they're in a bad mood, you're in a bad mood.
Speaker 1: If they're high energy, your high energy. If they're low energy,
Speaker 1: you're low energy. Constantly we feel our highs and lows
Speaker 1: are mirroring the highs and lows of the person we're
Speaker 1: tied to. Often, the hardest people to do this with
Speaker 1: is our parents. We feel responsible for our parents' feelings.
Speaker 1: So when your parents going through something really, really difficult,
Speaker 1: maybe they're going through a transition, maybe they're going through
Speaker 1: a shift or a change, and all of a sudden.
Speaker 1: Not only are you constantly thinking about their feelings, you
Speaker 1: feel responsible for them. You feel it's your job to
Speaker 1: make today a great day for them. You try and
Speaker 1: change everything, You change your whole routine, You call them
Speaker 1: first thing in the morning, you put aside other tasks.
Speaker 1: And by the way, this is all well intentioned and
Speaker 1: it's a beautiful act of love. But what we don't
Speaker 1: realize is we haven't helped them develop the emotional skills
Speaker 1: and tools they need. You're trying to be a mood shifter,
Speaker 1: a mood changer for that person, rather than putting the
Speaker 1: control in their hand. It's almost like saying, hey, I'll
Speaker 1: decide what to watch watch tonight. Hey I'll decide what
Speaker 1: to order tonight. And sure, it can be great to
Speaker 1: create that space in the short term, but long term,
Speaker 1: the goal is to equip that person with the ability
Speaker 1: to make choices about their own feelings. Trust me when
Speaker 1: I say this, This is not about being hard hearted.
Speaker 1: It's not about not caring. It's not about not loving
Speaker 1: someone you really, really love. It's about recognizing that real
Speaker 1: love is helping someone learn how to choose their feelings
Speaker 1: and emotions. You're not helping someone if you're deabilitating them,
Speaker 1: you're not helping someone if they're dependent on you to
Speaker 1: feel good. If someone's dependent on you to feel good,
Speaker 1: you have not helped them. You've stalled them. Think about
Speaker 1: that for a second. If someone is dependent on you
Speaker 1: to feel happy, you have not helped them, You've actually
Speaker 1: hurt them, because that means when you're not available, when
Speaker 1: you're not accessible, when you're not capable, when you don't
Speaker 1: have time or space, that person can't find that joy.
Speaker 1: I'm sure that's not what you want for them. So
Speaker 1: we don't want to feel respect responsible for other people's feelings.
Speaker 1: We want to feel connected in helping them, supporting them,
Speaker 1: being there for them, but not responsible, because when you're
Speaker 1: responsible for it, you then take it into your own
Speaker 1: life and start to carry it. The second thing you're
Speaker 1: not responsible for is how people perceive you. You can
Speaker 1: say everything right and people will still think you're wrong.
Speaker 1: You can speak the truth and people will still think
Speaker 1: you're lying. You can try to explain yourself and people
Speaker 1: will still misunderstand you. You are not responsible for how
Speaker 1: people perceive you. They might base it off a first
Speaker 1: impression something someone else said, something they heard. If someone
Speaker 1: chooses to perceive you based on another person's opinion of you,
Speaker 1: that means they don't want to get to know you.
Speaker 1: Let me say that again. If someone bases their perception
Speaker 1: of you based on how another person perceives you, they
Speaker 1: don't actually want to get to know you. If someone
Speaker 1: told you that someone else was lazy, disorganized, and you
Speaker 1: take their word for it, it means you don't want
Speaker 1: to make the time or the energy to actually get
Speaker 1: to know that person, because chances are if you did
Speaker 1: get to know them, you might realize that, just like
Speaker 1: all of us, they're lazy in some ways, but they're
Speaker 1: organized in other ways. So if we're using people as
Speaker 1: our shortcuts to learn about people, then guess what, we
Speaker 1: don't want to deeply get to know that person. So
Speaker 1: you're not responsible for how people perceive you because people
Speaker 1: will p see you through all sorts of ways. Think
Speaker 1: about this for a second. What's the one word someone
Speaker 1: would use to describe you if they saw you but
Speaker 1: didn't speak to you. Second question, how would someone describe
Speaker 1: you in one word if they spoke to you for
Speaker 1: a few minutes. Now, imagine if someone spoke to you
Speaker 1: for a few hours. I'm guessing. There's a big difference
Speaker 1: in how someone perceives you when they see you and
Speaker 1: don't speak to you, when they speak to you for
Speaker 1: a few minutes, and when they speak to you for
Speaker 1: a few hours. That's definitely true for me, right. I
Speaker 1: feel like if someone saw me, they may have a
Speaker 1: certain perception. If someone spoke to me for a few minutes,
Speaker 1: they'll have another perception. And if someone spend hours or
Speaker 1: months or years with me, they'll have a different perception.
Speaker 1: How can you possibly be responsible for how people perceive
Speaker 1: you when the way people see you is the way
Speaker 1: they see the world. The way people see you is
Speaker 1: how they often look at themselves. The way people see
Speaker 1: you is how they've felt seen or unseen in the past.
Speaker 1: The way people see you is based on someone else
Speaker 1: they met that was kind of like you. There are
Speaker 1: so many touch points as to how someone deciphers and
Speaker 1: decides how they perceive you. You could try and be
Speaker 1: really nice and someone will say they're trying too hard.
Speaker 1: You could be a little stand offish and people will say, oh,
Speaker 1: they're really distant and absent. You could try and be
Speaker 1: really interested and curious and people will say they ask
Speaker 1: too many questions you could be a little more introverted,
Speaker 1: and people say, oh, they suck the energy out of
Speaker 1: the room. How people will perceive your silence is different.
Speaker 1: Some people perceive it as a strength, as a power.
Speaker 1: Some people perceive it as a weakness. I really understood
Speaker 1: this when I lived in the monastery and we were
Speaker 1: exposed to this idea of humility, and humility was seen
Speaker 1: as the number one quality that humans could aspire for.
Speaker 1: But today when people demonstrate humility, people often think of
Speaker 1: it as low self esteem, or they think of it
Speaker 1: as low self worth. They don't value it. They value
Speaker 1: someone who's got a bit of swag, who's got a
Speaker 1: bit of confidence. But for the monks, humility is the
Speaker 1: greatest sign of confidence. The ability to accept what you
Speaker 1: know and what you don't know, to be honest about
Speaker 1: your strength and your weaknesses, to be clear about what
Speaker 1: you're good at and what you're bad at. That's reality.
Speaker 1: But today we reward people feel confident all the time,
Speaker 1: people who look like they have it all together. Perception
Speaker 1: is also different all across the world, and how we
Speaker 1: receive people's praise and perception is fascinating. I remember looking
Speaker 1: at a case study of the performance company Des Silas.
Speaker 1: You might have even heard of them, or you might
Speaker 1: have even been to see a show. In some parts
Speaker 1: of the world, when the acrobats would jump through a hoop,
Speaker 1: triple flip backwards, land on their feet, fall through a
Speaker 1: hoop of fire, the audience would go crazy. The audience
Speaker 1: would be applauding, praising, shouting, screaming, losing it, and the
Speaker 1: acrobats would feel acknowledged and seen. And in some other
Speaker 1: cultures around the world, the acrobats would finish a show
Speaker 1: and feel like they flopped. They'd feel like they failed.
Speaker 1: Why because the audience didn't clap is loud, the audience
Speaker 1: didn't shout as loud, the audience didn't scream is loud.
Speaker 1: But here's the fascinating thing about that. When De Slay,
Speaker 1: when it did some studies on this, they realized certain
Speaker 1: cultures don't show their emotions and their praise as expressively.
Speaker 1: Someone could be clapping like this and feel the same
Speaker 1: level of excitement as someone who's on their seat, jumping
Speaker 1: and shouting. They actually had to train the acrobats to
Speaker 1: realize that different cultures express appreciation differently. Some cultures had
Speaker 1: the ability to be so expressive, to be so emphatic,
Speaker 1: to be so verbally congratulatory that they'd feel it, but
Speaker 1: they had to give the same performance when the audience
Speaker 1: didn't respond that way. This is one of the challenges
Speaker 1: about how people perceive us. If you feel responsible for
Speaker 1: how people perceive you, you will always be performing, You
Speaker 1: will always be on a stage. You will never feel
Speaker 1: you can take the mask off. You will feel like
Speaker 1: every word you say, and every act, and every thought
Speaker 1: and every behavior is under scrutiny. This is known as
Speaker 1: the spotlight effect, where you feel that your whole life
Speaker 1: is constantly being analyzed. So before someone else can analyze you,
Speaker 1: you analyze yourself. You feel to yourself, you edit yourself,
Speaker 1: you overthink yourself, and now guess what, you get more
Speaker 1: and more distant from the person you are. You're not
Speaker 1: responsible for how other people perceive you. I couldn't be
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Speaker 1: sure you use the code on purpose. The third thing
Speaker 1: you're not responsible for is fixing people's problems. You can
Speaker 1: offer support, but you can't solve it. You can be patient,
Speaker 1: but you can't take away their pain. You can be helpful,
Speaker 1: but you can't fix the Number one reason most of
Speaker 1: us want to fix other people's problems is to make
Speaker 1: ourselves feel better. It's the harsh truth, but we all
Speaker 1: know it's real. I feel that way as well. I
Speaker 1: spent years trying to solve and fix people's problems. I
Speaker 1: cared for them, I love them. I didn't want them
Speaker 1: to feel pain. What did I actually do? I stole
Speaker 1: their ability to solve their own problems. I took away
Speaker 1: their independence and strength to deal with what they were
Speaker 1: going through. I thought it was either aw either I'm
Speaker 1: on the sidelines or I'm fully deep in there trying
Speaker 1: to save them, not realizing that it required a bit
Speaker 1: from them, It required them to find themselves. Now, this
Speaker 1: doesn't mean I need to hide from them. It didn't
Speaker 1: mean I need to distance myself for them. It means
Speaker 1: I need to understand the difference between support and solution.
Speaker 1: We need to understand the difference between focusing your energy
Speaker 1: and trying to fix. When you get lost trying to
Speaker 1: fix someone else's problems, you're rattling off all these solutions,
Speaker 1: all these multiple steps they can take, and maybe they'll
Speaker 1: be lucky if they can take it. What we don't
Speaker 1: get too often is the root of why they can't
Speaker 1: solve it. You could give someone all the best solutions
Speaker 1: in the world and they could still make no shift,
Speaker 1: because what's blocking them is their own belief in themselves.
Speaker 1: What's blocking them is them worrying about what people think.
Speaker 1: What's blocking them is them worrying about how they're going
Speaker 1: to be seen, how they're going to be looked at.
Speaker 1: I was talking to a friend the other day and
Speaker 1: it dawned on me how many people are scared to
Speaker 1: put up a post or a video or a piece
Speaker 1: of content because they're worried about what their friends will think.
Speaker 1: You can fix their problem by solving it, sending them
Speaker 1: all the videos, giving them advice, whatever it may be,
Speaker 1: but that's the root of their issue. You may have
Speaker 1: a family member who wants to be healthier, and you're
Speaker 1: sending them everything. Here's the article, here's the podcast, here's
Speaker 1: the block, here's the everything, and that person just feels
Speaker 1: overwhelmed by the information because what they need to do
Speaker 1: is take one step not catch up with you. I
Speaker 1: was saying this to a friend this morning on a walk.
Speaker 1: We were talking about why it often feels like it
Speaker 1: takes people around us so long to understand us, and
Speaker 1: I was sharing this analogy with him. I said to him,
Speaker 1: it's like when you've just finished watching season four of
Speaker 1: an amazing show and you're telling all your friends, Hey,
Speaker 1: you need to watch this show. It's amazing, I love it,
Speaker 1: it's incredible, and now they've got to spend all that
Speaker 1: time catching up. So you're at season four, you've finished it,
Speaker 1: and they're at season one, and not everyone is going
Speaker 1: to go on that journey with you. So you're not
Speaker 1: responsible to fix everyone's problems. You can only tell them
Speaker 1: what could work. But you can't fix it. That person
Speaker 1: has to watch the show right, that person has to
Speaker 1: make the time, the person has to commit to all
Speaker 1: the episodes of the show. And that's entertainment, let alone growth.
Speaker 1: So I can't fix it. I can't solve it for you.
Speaker 1: You have to put in work. And often we'll sit
Speaker 1: there and we'll just be sitting there, going, how do
Speaker 1: I fix this? What do I do? What can I say?
Speaker 1: What can I do? What is the perfect thing I
Speaker 1: can say. I used to have a client who used
Speaker 1: to say that to me all the time and say, Jay,
Speaker 1: you always say the perfect thing. Can you teach me
Speaker 1: how to always say the perfect thing? And I remember
Speaker 1: saying to me, I said, first of all, I don't
Speaker 1: always say the perfect thing, and if I do, it's
Speaker 1: because I'm present. It's not because I'm trying to say
Speaker 1: the perfect thing. You don't say the right thing because
Speaker 1: you're trying to say the right thing. You say the
Speaker 1: right thing because you're so conscious, aligned, and present in
Speaker 1: that moment that you can truly resonate with that person.
Speaker 1: Number four, You are not responsible for living up to others' expectations.
Speaker 1: Guess what, you never will. Even if you try to
Speaker 1: live up to other people's expectations, you never will. You
Speaker 1: will let people down, even if you try your hardest
Speaker 1: not to. They'll be disappointed, they'll be disheartened, even if
Speaker 1: you try your best. Because the truth is, we can't
Speaker 1: read anyone's mind, and no one can read ours. It's
Speaker 1: not possible for me to check off every box of
Speaker 1: the expectation you have. How many of you have ever
Speaker 1: tried to plan something for a family member or friend,
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a surprise birthday. Maybe it's getting a gift.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's a vacation or a getaway, and maybe you
Speaker 1: tried to plan it meticulously, but there was something along
Speaker 1: the way that person said, Oh, that flight was too long. Ah,
Speaker 1: the hotel bed wasn't comfortable. Oh you know, like I
Speaker 1: like that music, but it's not my favorite type. Oh
Speaker 1: you know, I don't really love chocolate cake. You know,
Speaker 1: whatever it is like, you couldn't possibly know everyone's preference,
Speaker 1: and we feel very responsible to live up to other
Speaker 1: people's expectations. Some people expect you to get a certain job,
Speaker 1: so you chase it your whole life, only to realize
Speaker 1: it's not the job you want. Some people want you
Speaker 1: to find a certain partner, so you chase a particular
Speaker 1: type of partner, only to realize you have nothing in
Speaker 1: common with them. Some people in your life will expect
Speaker 1: you to have children, and you may have children because
Speaker 1: of that expectation, only to realize you weren't ready to
Speaker 1: be a parent. When you pursue and chase things that
Speaker 1: other people expect of you, even if you get them,
Speaker 1: they won't be happy, and neither will you. How can
Speaker 1: you be happy chasing someone else's priority. How could you
Speaker 1: ever be joyful? Chasing someone else is life? So don't
Speaker 1: feel responsible for other people's expectations, because those are the
Speaker 1: expectations they often had of themselves. Sometimes it's not even
Speaker 1: that they want you to have a good career. They
Speaker 1: want to be friends with someone who has a good career.
Speaker 1: They want to be able to tell their friends that
Speaker 1: you're having a child, that you're getting married, whatever it
Speaker 1: may be. I remember not going to my graduation ceremony.
Speaker 1: I graduated, but I didn't go to the event where
Speaker 1: you get the scroll and you wear the hat and
Speaker 1: all the rest of it. And my mom never got
Speaker 1: that picture. And I remember my mom would say to me,
Speaker 1: she said, all my friends have pictures of their kids graduating.
Speaker 1: I don't have a picture of you graduating. And it's
Speaker 1: a really really interesting thought because it was this expectation
Speaker 1: she had to me. Now, it's not the biggest deal,
Speaker 1: and my mom's wonderful, but there's that feeling that I
Speaker 1: would have had to either be at my graduation or
Speaker 1: at that point I was living as a monk in India.
Speaker 1: And now when I look back at that, I think, wow,
Speaker 1: it's so obvious. I made the right decision. But if
Speaker 1: I tried to live up to our expectation, I would
Speaker 1: have made the wrong choice. I remember growing up, my
Speaker 1: parents really wanted me to study sciences. They would have
Speaker 1: loved for me to study biology and chemistry and physics,
Speaker 1: and instead that I studied art in design and economics
Speaker 1: and sociology and philosophy, and those were the subjects I
Speaker 1: was attracted to. And now when I look back, I think,
Speaker 1: wait a minute, if I would have lived up to
Speaker 1: their expectation, I would have been further away from myself.
Speaker 1: The closer you get to living up to other people's expectations,
Speaker 1: the further away you are from yourself. The closer you
Speaker 1: get to checking off everyone else's list, the further away
Speaker 1: you are from knowing what's on yours. The closer you
Speaker 1: get to winning in the eyes of others, the further
Speaker 1: away you are from winning in your own eyes. We're
Speaker 1: actually losing. You lose a part of yourself when you
Speaker 1: try to meet someone else's expectation of you that you
Speaker 1: don't value. Stop feeling like you're responsible for other people's expectations.
Speaker 1: Those expectations come from their expectations of their own, their
Speaker 1: expectations of their life, the expectations they adopted from their parents,
Speaker 1: the expectations that they've adopted from their community. And make
Speaker 1: sure that the expectations you're setting are the ones you
Speaker 1: want to commit your life to. Number five, You're not
Speaker 1: responsible for how others decide to treat you. Their mood
Speaker 1: isn't your job. Their actions aren't your fault. You don't
Speaker 1: have to manage someone else's bad day. Their behavior is
Speaker 1: about them. It doesn't say anything about who you are.
Speaker 1: You're not responsible for making someone else grow up. Maturity
Speaker 1: is their journey. You don't have to carry that burden.
Speaker 1: I think often we feel very very responsible for how
Speaker 1: people treat us. We feel that the way they behave
Speaker 1: with us is a sign of who we are. I
Speaker 1: was speaking to someone last week who said the person
Speaker 1: that broke up with them has made them feel like
Speaker 1: they're not lovable. I was speaking to someone else a
Speaker 1: couple of months ago, and they were saying that their
Speaker 1: manager is making them feel like they don't have any value.
Speaker 1: And the reality is, if you have a relationship with someone,
Speaker 1: it's worth checking. I want to understand where this is
Speaker 1: coming from. I want to recognize and know if the
Speaker 1: way you're treating me, where's it coming from? What's beneath this?
Speaker 1: Because usually you'll find some people don't have a good
Speaker 1: reason at all. They were angry, they were tired, they
Speaker 1: were exhausted, and you were receiving their anger, their exhaustion,
Speaker 1: and their fatigue. You weren't receiving what you deserved. You
Speaker 1: were receiving what they were dealing with because they didn't
Speaker 1: give themselves the rest they deserved. Think about that for
Speaker 1: a second. You were receiving not what you deserved, but
Speaker 1: you were receiving what they were experiencing. People don't treat
Speaker 1: you how you deserve to be treated. They treat you
Speaker 1: how they treat themselves. The way people treat you is
Speaker 1: not a reflection of you. It's a reflection of how
Speaker 1: they see themselves and what they're feeling. The way people
Speaker 1: treat you shows you how that person is living right now,
Speaker 1: not how you're performing. You can't be responsible for how
Speaker 1: others decide to treat you, because then you'd be responsible
Speaker 1: for their entire life. You'd have to manage their morning,
Speaker 1: their evening, their day, their relationships. You'd have to manage
Speaker 1: everything in order to hope that they treat you right,
Speaker 1: and sometimes maybe even if we do that, we try
Speaker 1: and overmanage, We try and over monitor, we try and
Speaker 1: over control someone to hope that they'll treat us better,
Speaker 1: only to realize nothing changes, and then we wonder, why
Speaker 1: is nothing changing. I'm doing everything right well because there's
Speaker 1: something internally that person's going through that we don't have
Speaker 1: control over. So I want this episode to be a reminder.
Speaker 1: You're not responsible for someone's insecurity. You can't fix what's
Speaker 1: broken inside them. That's their work to do. You're not
Speaker 1: responsible for their unrealistic expectations. You decide your limits, not
Speaker 1: their impossible standards. You're not responsible for their misplaced anger.
Speaker 1: The reaction isn't your fault. Don't hold on to guilt
Speaker 1: that isn't yours. You're not responsible for someone else's happiness.
Speaker 1: Their joy isn't your job. You've got your own heart
Speaker 1: to take care of, and you're not responsible for other
Speaker 1: people misunderstanding you. You don't have to prove yourself. Your
Speaker 1: truth is enough, and you're not responsible for making them
Speaker 1: respect your balls hungrys. Set them clearly and firmly. Enforcing
Speaker 1: them isn't selfish, it's necessary, and you're not responsible for
Speaker 1: anyone else's approval. Their validation doesn't define you, because you're
Speaker 1: already enough exactly as you are. I hope you'll pass
Speaker 1: this episode on because sometimes we just need these reminders,
Speaker 1: because we're all carrying that weight, and I hope this
Speaker 1: frees up yours. Thank you for listening on purpose, Leave
Speaker 1: a review, Share this episode with a friend, and remember
Speaker 1: I'm forever in your corner and I'm always rooting for you.
Speaker 1: If you love this episode, you'll really enjoy my episode
Speaker 1: with Selena Gomez on befriending your inner critic and how
Speaker 1: to speak to yourself with more compassion.
Speaker 2: My fears are only going to continue to show me
Speaker 2: what I'm capable of. The more that I face my fears,
Speaker 2: the more that I feel I'm gaining strength, I'm gaining wisdom,
Speaker 2: and I just want to keep doing that