WEBVTT - "I BECAME A GOD" 0:00:00.200 --> 0:00:06.480 Shut helone front door. Hello, no way is that you? Yeah? 0:00:06.600 --> 0:00:06.800 Is this? 0:00:07.040 --> 0:00:10.760 Uh? Tybee? What's what's up? Dude? How is life? 0:00:11.119 --> 0:00:13.080 You have? You just caught me at the perfect time? 0:00:13.880 --> 0:00:15.480 Yeah? Why is it? Why is it the perfect time? 0:00:15.600 --> 0:00:21.320 I just finished I just finished the most cathartic yoga session, 0:00:22.600 --> 0:00:26.560 just like stepped out of tadasana, which is a corpse pose. 0:00:27.080 --> 0:00:30.240 And I looked it right at my point, open Welch's 0:00:30.280 --> 0:00:34.839 fruit snacks package and then I hear a beep and 0:00:34.920 --> 0:00:35.199 it's you. 0:00:36.920 --> 0:00:39.199 It must have been the universe working its magic on you. 0:00:41.159 --> 0:00:42.959 I swear it was the fruit snacks. 0:00:43.360 --> 0:00:46.600 Okay, I so you here's what the call screen I 0:00:46.640 --> 0:00:49.080 wrote down about what you wanted to talk about, and 0:00:49.280 --> 0:00:51.880 uh I looked at it and it's it. It doesn't 0:00:51.880 --> 0:00:53.800 make a lot of sense, but I I wanted to 0:00:53.840 --> 0:00:57.160 talk to you about it. 0:00:57.400 --> 0:00:58.440 YEA clear up? 0:00:59.720 --> 0:01:01.760 Okay, I'm gonna say, Can I tell can? I? 0:01:04.000 --> 0:01:04.480 Of course? 0:01:05.440 --> 0:01:08.840 Okay? Tevy thirty years old from Colorado. It says here 0:01:08.880 --> 0:01:16.880 that you started living your best life once you made 0:01:16.959 --> 0:01:29.440 yourself out of clay and started living as this clay figure. Yeah, 0:01:29.480 --> 0:01:32.000 what does that mean? How did you make yourself out 0:01:32.000 --> 0:01:32.640 of clay? 0:01:34.160 --> 0:01:38.039 Honestly, I wouldn't have even been able to tell you 0:01:38.120 --> 0:01:41.559 all this time until the moment happened. And even now 0:01:41.680 --> 0:01:45.000 I'm still wrapping my head around how it got to 0:01:45.040 --> 0:01:47.920 this point and why it had to be this way. 0:01:47.960 --> 0:01:51.040 But I'm just super happy and excited that it did. 0:01:52.000 --> 0:01:54.840 But you like kind of explain it. It's not like 0:01:54.880 --> 0:01:58.960 I made It's not like I made a realistic rendition 0:01:59.080 --> 0:02:03.280 of myself like someone else may assume, maybe like I 0:02:03.360 --> 0:02:06.640 made a small version of my body. I made like 0:02:07.400 --> 0:02:10.000 a character. I guess you can call him an avatar 0:02:10.760 --> 0:02:16.160 that represents me on like the deepest level. And he's 0:02:16.240 --> 0:02:20.679 like three inches tall. And ever since I made him, 0:02:21.200 --> 0:02:23.680 he's had it. He has his own house, now, he 0:02:23.720 --> 0:02:26.440 has his own car, he has a whole bunch of friends, 0:02:26.919 --> 0:02:31.120 he has like new teachers, he's starting his own restaurant, 0:02:31.160 --> 0:02:34.160 and the whole time he's doing all this crazy stuff, 0:02:34.360 --> 0:02:39.360 like very ambitious. I finally found my body that was 0:02:39.400 --> 0:02:44.040 in pain for so long in the process of chasing 0:02:44.600 --> 0:02:47.160 what society kind of makes you think you need to 0:02:47.200 --> 0:02:50.640 do to be happy. And since I found my body, 0:02:50.880 --> 0:02:54.000 like I've done everything I guess I should do, and 0:02:54.080 --> 0:02:56.360 I've let go of things that I should have let 0:02:56.440 --> 0:02:59.360 go of years ago. And I have found the most 0:02:59.440 --> 0:03:05.120 relief in real like body, my corporeal self. But I 0:03:05.200 --> 0:03:07.840 blame it. I don't blame it. I just I think 0:03:08.080 --> 0:03:10.160 this little dude has something to do with it. 0:03:11.600 --> 0:03:18.200 Okay, so let's go real slowly on this. You built 0:03:18.240 --> 0:03:20.079 a little you, it's talking about it's okay, that's a 0:03:20.080 --> 0:03:22.520 good that was a good top line. Okay. You built 0:03:22.520 --> 0:03:25.120 a little guy at a clay that is not necessarily 0:03:25.160 --> 0:03:29.480 looks like you, but it's a representation of you. Yeah, 0:03:29.520 --> 0:03:32.200 and the little guy is living his own little guy life. 0:03:32.240 --> 0:03:35.280 You've created for it because you are in control of 0:03:35.320 --> 0:03:37.640 this little guy. You have created for this little guy 0:03:38.120 --> 0:03:40.920 a house and a family, and and and you've basically 0:03:41.400 --> 0:03:46.360 orchestrated for this little guy a nice life. 0:03:46.600 --> 0:03:48.920 I don't know if it was me. I feel like 0:03:49.000 --> 0:03:49.760 we did it together. 0:03:50.960 --> 0:03:54.600 Okay, So you worked with the little guy to orchestrate 0:03:54.960 --> 0:04:01.760 a nice life for him. Yeah, okay, and you've noticed 0:04:01.760 --> 0:04:04.880 that as the little guy's life is getting better, are 0:04:05.200 --> 0:04:08.160 you sitting there and making a house out of clay, 0:04:08.360 --> 0:04:11.120 making a wife out of clay, making children out of clay? 0:04:13.880 --> 0:04:18.440 I don't think he wants children he's not there yet. 0:04:18.440 --> 0:04:24.039 I don't think he's old enough in his realm, but 0:04:24.200 --> 0:04:27.520 he's he's living it up. Like I'm telling you, he's 0:04:27.560 --> 0:04:28.000 doing things. 0:04:28.040 --> 0:04:31.200 Okay, So I saw the point of the question. Are 0:04:31.200 --> 0:04:33.839 you are you making stuff for him out of clay? 0:04:33.880 --> 0:04:35.480 That's what That's what I wanted to ask. 0:04:36.000 --> 0:04:39.400 My hands are yeah, okay, uh, And. 0:04:39.400 --> 0:04:42.880 You feel as though your hands are are like, like, 0:04:42.960 --> 0:04:46.200 are you channeling something? And the thing that you have 0:04:46.360 --> 0:04:52.039 challenged is channeled is working with you to create these things. 0:04:53.080 --> 0:04:55.800 I feel like I'm on like this, like I'm in 0:04:55.800 --> 0:05:00.640 the middle of like a spiritual domino effect of understanding 0:05:00.680 --> 0:05:03.440 the universe via this process, and I hope it's not. 0:05:04.160 --> 0:05:07.240 I'm not digressing, but I feel like as I've been 0:05:07.279 --> 0:05:09.599 making things for him and living my life through him, 0:05:10.520 --> 0:05:14.160 I've been understanding how our creator, if you believe in that, 0:05:15.120 --> 0:05:18.160 whatever angle you have on that, how they view us 0:05:18.640 --> 0:05:21.679 and how they made us in their quote unquote image, 0:05:21.720 --> 0:05:25.520 maybe not exactly their image, but how they feel. And 0:05:25.560 --> 0:05:28.600 then as we live our best lives, it's like we're 0:05:28.640 --> 0:05:31.960 honoring our creator. And I almost feel like when this 0:05:32.000 --> 0:05:35.680 little guy's living his best life, he's honoring me. And 0:05:35.720 --> 0:05:38.520 then I feel better, and then I can relax and 0:05:38.560 --> 0:05:41.320 the stress is gone and I let go of things, 0:05:41.400 --> 0:05:44.039 and then I handle myself and then it's like a 0:05:44.120 --> 0:05:46.840 back and forth of treating each other right. And then 0:05:47.120 --> 0:05:51.520 now I'm like thinking about how I must maintain this 0:05:51.600 --> 0:05:55.960 conversation with myself in order to maintain spiritual connection with 0:05:56.040 --> 0:05:59.400 the universe, like and whatever is responsible for it. 0:05:59.720 --> 0:06:03.000 So you know, actually it does make a little bit 0:06:03.040 --> 0:06:07.000 of sense. So as you have created this thing, and 0:06:07.040 --> 0:06:08.960 as you have worked with this thing to create its 0:06:08.960 --> 0:06:14.680 own life, it has shindy light perhaps on your relationship 0:06:14.720 --> 0:06:20.159 with whatever it is you believe created you. Yeah, okay, 0:06:20.600 --> 0:06:22.960 and tell me how it has influenced that relationship. 0:06:26.920 --> 0:06:30.279 It's made me take care of myself. It's made me 0:06:30.480 --> 0:06:35.279 honor myself. It's made me reach out for things I 0:06:35.360 --> 0:06:39.279 never thought I had the confidence or the gusto to 0:06:39.360 --> 0:06:42.400 reach out for, just because I feel like the creator 0:06:42.920 --> 0:06:44.880 or whatever you want to call it, or them or 0:06:44.880 --> 0:06:48.719 her or him, like that's what they would want, like that, 0:06:49.040 --> 0:06:50.840 like they're up there and they want to see us 0:06:50.880 --> 0:06:54.359 live our best life. Okay, So just like you know 0:06:54.400 --> 0:06:55.800 what I'm gonna do it? 0:06:56.440 --> 0:07:01.839 Okay. Interesting, So so to the point that you just said, 0:07:02.120 --> 0:07:04.440 you're reaching out for things you never would have thought. 0:07:04.640 --> 0:07:08.120 Let's get specific here, what specific things have you been 0:07:08.160 --> 0:07:12.400 doing for your life that are positive as a result 0:07:12.400 --> 0:07:16.680 of all of this, I. 0:07:16.600 --> 0:07:22.160 Guess to start on some more primal levels I've I've 0:07:22.760 --> 0:07:24.880 I think maybe you would be interested in this one. 0:07:24.920 --> 0:07:29.679 I stopped masturbating, which was interesting because you know, as 0:07:29.480 --> 0:07:35.800 a as a as a human being, it's the natural thing, 0:07:36.160 --> 0:07:39.480 or it's built into you to feel like you want 0:07:39.520 --> 0:07:42.040 to satisfy yourself in that way in order to I guess, 0:07:42.040 --> 0:07:44.920 honor yourself in a certain type of way, like it 0:07:45.040 --> 0:07:48.160 must deserve a little relief for something. And because I 0:07:48.160 --> 0:07:52.640 found relief elsewhere in this more deep way, I've let 0:07:52.720 --> 0:07:55.360 go no pun intended, but I've let go of that 0:07:55.600 --> 0:07:59.920 part of myself interesting and it's as a result, hell 0:08:00.120 --> 0:08:04.200 my lower back, it helped me spot my pelvic floor. 0:08:05.200 --> 0:08:09.239 It's helped me stop producing so much cortisol or stress 0:08:09.240 --> 0:08:14.760 inducing chemicals in my body. Yeah, it's just been really 0:08:14.760 --> 0:08:17.720 good in that way. I stopped smoking. I've been smoking 0:08:17.760 --> 0:08:21.800 weed for like fifteen years, actually, no seventeen now I'm 0:08:21.840 --> 0:08:24.000 misused to saying fifteen. For the past couple of years, 0:08:24.000 --> 0:08:26.720 but it's a nice number. But like seventeen years I've 0:08:26.720 --> 0:08:29.400 been smoking I would, you know, everything, I could take 0:08:29.480 --> 0:08:32.440 PC and I would, And now I've been like, I 0:08:32.480 --> 0:08:35.800 switched over to CVD and it's been like, maybe the 0:08:35.800 --> 0:08:37.920 best choice I could have made. I didn't even take 0:08:37.920 --> 0:08:39.040 it seriously until now. 0:08:41.880 --> 0:08:45.600 Okay, so I stopped masturbating, you stopped smoking weed. Anything else. 0:08:49.320 --> 0:08:52.160 I've been able to save money for the first time 0:08:52.200 --> 0:08:56.520 in my life. I have my own place confidently now. 0:08:57.960 --> 0:09:01.480 I have a better relationship with my family. What else, 0:09:01.520 --> 0:09:04.680 I've been able to drop traumatic relationships in my life 0:09:04.720 --> 0:09:07.760 without reaching out or even having thoughts to reach out, 0:09:07.800 --> 0:09:12.040 and I could talk about it without feeling triggered. I 0:09:12.080 --> 0:09:14.920 don't know, just primal things that kind of bleed out 0:09:15.080 --> 0:09:17.240 into I guess bigger things. And I'm really only at 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:20.240 the beginning of this, but I can tell it's in 0:09:20.280 --> 0:09:20.920 a good path. 0:09:22.040 --> 0:09:26.160 So to summarize where we are at so far, you 0:09:26.200 --> 0:09:30.480 have created a small figure that has a representation of yourself, 0:09:31.040 --> 0:09:35.160 and that figure, being the creator of it, has given 0:09:35.160 --> 0:09:38.640 you greater perspective of the relationship between you and whatever 0:09:38.640 --> 0:09:41.960 it is that created you, and your desire to honor 0:09:42.000 --> 0:09:44.640 whatever it is that created you, has caused you to 0:09:44.679 --> 0:09:49.440 make positive lifestyle changes, such as not masturbating, not smoking weed, 0:09:49.920 --> 0:09:52.440 and forming better relationships with people. 0:09:54.200 --> 0:09:56.000 Yeah, you're so conciseed. 0:09:58.040 --> 0:09:59.840 Wow, we did it. You know. We started out this 0:10:00.120 --> 0:10:03.040 absolutely no sense and uh we kind of got somewhere 0:10:03.040 --> 0:10:03.320 with it. 0:10:06.679 --> 0:10:10.760 Yeah, you're good at putting things into smaller sentences. 0:10:11.720 --> 0:10:16.440 Okay, so let me ask you this, Uh where does 0:10:16.480 --> 0:10:19.640 it go with this figure? Like, how long have you 0:10:19.720 --> 0:10:27.320 been have you been doing this? This project, A jacked 0:10:28.679 --> 0:10:31.840 I don't even whatever you call it, this thing with 0:10:31.880 --> 0:10:32.439 this figure. 0:10:32.920 --> 0:10:39.400 Yeah. The odd thing is is this figure started out 0:10:39.600 --> 0:10:44.920 or emerged from a reoccurrence of a imaginary friend I 0:10:44.960 --> 0:10:48.960 had when I was younger that I abandoned when I 0:10:49.000 --> 0:10:51.120 was younger due to a friend stealing him in some 0:10:51.240 --> 0:10:53.360 really weird way that's too long of a story to 0:10:53.400 --> 0:10:56.959 talk about. But as a result, I lost my path. 0:10:57.320 --> 0:10:59.520 And when I thought of him again and I thought 0:10:59.520 --> 0:11:04.080 about where this imaginary friend was, he brought me back. 0:11:04.320 --> 0:11:07.600 And I didn't even make him correctly until like two 0:11:07.679 --> 0:11:11.440 years later, after I realized I should honor this imaginary friend. 0:11:12.280 --> 0:11:14.760 And then now he became like I finally made a 0:11:14.760 --> 0:11:19.280 figure for myself and that figure is me. And that happened, 0:11:19.720 --> 0:11:24.760 I guess several months ago. And since then, I've built 0:11:24.760 --> 0:11:28.080 a house for him. It's like a three story house, 0:11:29.200 --> 0:11:32.920 four rooms, like a balcony where they can DJ and stuff. 0:11:32.920 --> 0:11:36.400 He's had a driveway. But the next project is I'm 0:11:36.440 --> 0:11:40.720 making a restaurant for him to serve up these dishes 0:11:40.800 --> 0:11:44.280 that I make out of Milly Clay. I do Milly 0:11:44.440 --> 0:11:46.480 Clay work. That's what the figure is made out of. 0:11:47.000 --> 0:11:49.439 He's made out of a MILLI do you know what 0:11:49.520 --> 0:11:50.040 a MILLI is? 0:11:51.520 --> 0:11:53.000 No? But you know I have a question for you. 0:11:53.080 --> 0:11:57.120 So h so your next thing for this h this 0:11:57.200 --> 0:11:59.400 Clay person is to make them a restaurant. 0:12:00.880 --> 0:12:02.720 Yeah, so he can sern So. 0:12:04.200 --> 0:12:09.200 Are you is any part of you living vicariously through 0:12:09.240 --> 0:12:13.560 this figure? Like are you taking your own desires for 0:12:13.679 --> 0:12:17.040 your life and giving them to this figure and the 0:12:17.120 --> 0:12:20.360 idea that perhaps it will come back to you? Like 0:12:20.440 --> 0:12:22.480 do you have a desire to open a restaurant? Do 0:12:22.559 --> 0:12:25.480 you want to have a house? And all the sort 0:12:25.520 --> 0:12:27.400 of things that you're giving to this this figure. 0:12:30.320 --> 0:12:33.120 I do strongly believe in them, like a Karmix cycle. 0:12:33.240 --> 0:12:35.000 So I do think, whether I like it or not, 0:12:35.080 --> 0:12:39.200 these things may blossom into larger versions. Like these are 0:12:39.480 --> 0:12:43.520 almost like dream boards someone might like perceive them to be, 0:12:43.679 --> 0:12:47.480 but they also are very like internal like their external projects, 0:12:47.520 --> 0:12:53.280 but their internal conversations with myself, Like like the house 0:12:53.520 --> 0:12:56.640 that I built helped me find my body, and when 0:12:56.640 --> 0:12:58.960 I found my body, I was able to recognize my 0:12:59.040 --> 0:13:01.520 friends and my family. I was somewhere to be. But 0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:04.360 now that I recognize my friends and my family, I 0:13:04.400 --> 0:13:08.040 need to build a restaurant within myself to invite in 0:13:08.320 --> 0:13:13.679 more people with this attitude that I've developed through building 0:13:13.720 --> 0:13:19.600 this thing for this character, and the restaurant is going 0:13:19.640 --> 0:13:22.880 to be something that helps me with my business and art, 0:13:24.640 --> 0:13:27.720 but it's also something that will help me invite more 0:13:27.760 --> 0:13:30.480 people just generally into my life. And I just felt 0:13:30.480 --> 0:13:36.280 like I wasn't inviting healthy people until now, and I 0:13:36.320 --> 0:13:41.199 just want to like reinforce that with these spiritual projects. 0:13:41.480 --> 0:13:44.600 I don't know the spiritual is the right word, but yeah, 0:13:44.720 --> 0:13:47.959 to answer your question specifically, maybe I'll make a restaurant 0:13:48.760 --> 0:13:51.560 or a gallery that is posed as a restaurant, and 0:13:51.600 --> 0:13:56.160 I serve delicious artworks to people to enjoy with their 0:13:56.600 --> 0:13:59.920 you know, internal conversations and maybe spark their own little 0:14:00.040 --> 0:14:00.760 karmic circle. 0:14:01.800 --> 0:14:08.640 So so, Tbby, tell me before we go, this has 0:14:08.679 --> 0:14:13.760 been very interesting, this has been you know, I'm I'm 0:14:13.800 --> 0:14:16.240 glad for you. You know, look, I think you know 0:14:16.360 --> 0:14:19.520 that this is definitely not a traditional thing that you're doing, 0:14:20.200 --> 0:14:23.680 but I'm glad that it is. It sounds like it's 0:14:23.720 --> 0:14:29.080 been helpful to you therapeutically. It's reinforcing this idea, this 0:14:29.160 --> 0:14:33.800 sort of hypothesis that you know, everyone has their own 0:14:33.840 --> 0:14:39.000 way of of dealing with the problems and the stuff 0:14:39.080 --> 0:14:42.440 going on in their life, and that there are various 0:14:42.440 --> 0:14:45.680 creative solutions to doing so. And it sounds like you've 0:14:45.760 --> 0:14:47.600 very much found your own that's working for you. And 0:14:47.600 --> 0:14:52.160 I'm happy to hear that. I guess before we go, 0:14:53.360 --> 0:14:57.520 what what does the future look like for you, Tabby? 0:14:57.600 --> 0:15:01.200 Are there any visions that you wanna share with us 0:15:01.240 --> 0:15:02.840 before before we move on? 0:15:08.240 --> 0:15:14.360 Any visions? Well, right now, I'm working on an Avatar, 0:15:14.400 --> 0:15:18.520 the Last Airbender Millie series and uh. 0:15:19.000 --> 0:15:20.360 Oh, like literally the best show. 0:15:22.320 --> 0:15:25.120 Yeah yeah, I'm deriving like lessons than learning from each 0:15:25.200 --> 0:15:30.960 book all the way through Kora uh to help me 0:15:31.880 --> 0:15:35.560 fully locked down who I am and what I want 0:15:35.560 --> 0:15:39.360 to be As the server in this restaurant and uh, 0:15:39.560 --> 0:15:42.040 if anyone wants to check that out, all they would 0:15:42.080 --> 0:15:46.720 have to look up is uh pilot. Actually, this reminds 0:15:46.760 --> 0:15:50.120 me I almost forgot what the hell? Okay, did you 0:15:50.120 --> 0:15:52.240 ever get that drawing I sent you? 0:15:52.240 --> 0:15:53.200 You sent me a drawing? 0:15:53.280 --> 0:15:53.560 Drawing? 0:15:55.120 --> 0:15:55.320 Yah? 0:15:58.560 --> 0:16:00.000 Yeah, all the ship that was you? 0:16:01.520 --> 0:16:02.000 Yeah it's me. 0:16:02.800 --> 0:16:03.720 Yeah I did get that. 0:16:05.760 --> 0:16:08.120 Hell yeah, fucking. 0:16:07.920 --> 0:16:11.120 Fuck damn, yeah, I did get that. It's it's it's 0:16:11.120 --> 0:16:13.440 it's back. It's back at my parents' place. But yeah, 0:16:13.480 --> 0:16:14.120 I did get that. 0:16:15.640 --> 0:16:22.400 Oh my gosh, that's amazing. Yeah, well god damn yeah. 0:16:22.480 --> 0:16:24.560 Oh yeah, yeah, with the line work and everything. Yeah, 0:16:24.600 --> 0:16:27.440 I did get that. Man, it's cool to like talk 0:16:27.520 --> 0:16:29.000 to you. And now the next time I see that, 0:16:29.000 --> 0:16:33.000 I'll be like, man, that's the figure guy. Yes, sir, 0:16:33.760 --> 0:16:35.640 well ship, what's your name again? Tebby? 0:16:37.400 --> 0:16:39.360 Uh I'm Tybee. 0:16:39.680 --> 0:16:42.760 Tybee well Tyby. Thank you first for sending me that. 0:16:43.160 --> 0:16:46.160 You go by what no doubt. Thank you for doing 0:16:46.240 --> 0:16:49.040 all of this. You've you've kind of led. You're the 0:16:49.120 --> 0:16:51.560 last thing that I drew in that style, Like you 0:16:51.720 --> 0:16:55.640 kind of broke me through that edate this style I 0:16:55.680 --> 0:16:58.760 was in m M and I wanted to return the 0:16:58.800 --> 0:17:00.560 savor and then I just I didn't even know it 0:17:00.640 --> 0:17:02.760 was going to do my last drawing, And ever since then, 0:17:02.800 --> 0:17:06.359 I've been chasing myself, Tybee. 0:17:06.359 --> 0:17:10.280 Do you have for people who are interested in you 0:17:10.400 --> 0:17:13.760 and what you're doing? Anyone who maybe this call connected 0:17:13.800 --> 0:17:16.359 with in particular? Do you have an Instagram or something 0:17:16.359 --> 0:17:17.640 where they can connect with you on? 0:17:19.600 --> 0:17:22.960 Uh? Yeah, I only have an Instagram. It's it's meta 0:17:23.080 --> 0:17:29.640 pilot M E D A H P E I one 0:17:29.680 --> 0:17:34.320 three seven. Yeah, check me out if you want to 0:17:34.320 --> 0:17:35.560 see the avatar. 0:17:36.359 --> 0:17:38.960 Uh, Tybee? Anything else? Any final words for the people 0:17:39.000 --> 0:17:39.919 the computer before we go? 0:17:44.440 --> 0:17:47.880 Try tbd out. 0:17:49.400 --> 0:17:54.480 Perfect, simple, clean, efficient? Uh, good luck to you, Tyby. 0:17:54.480 --> 0:17:55.280 Thank you very much for calling. 0:17:57.040 --> 0:18:00.200 Thank you Lyle Geck Nations plus. 0:18:02.200 --> 0:18:05.200 Well. That was fascinating. I love calls like that, where 0:18:05.400 --> 0:18:09.000 something every time, whether it's in a live show or 0:18:09.040 --> 0:18:11.680 on the street or when I'm like looking at calls, 0:18:11.720 --> 0:18:13.880 I'm gonna pick for this show. Anytime I see something 0:18:13.880 --> 0:18:17.439 that I'm like, what the fuck does that mean? The 0:18:17.480 --> 0:18:19.479 only the only way to figure it out is to 0:18:19.560 --> 0:18:25.000 dive into it with the parson. That was fascinating. That 0:18:25.160 --> 0:18:30.840 was fascinating. I don't know what my own. You know. 0:18:30.960 --> 0:18:33.320 It's it's interesting because it comes off as like bizarre 0:18:33.359 --> 0:18:36.640 and foreign, this thing he's talking about of like he 0:18:36.720 --> 0:18:40.000 created himself out of clay and that's caused him to 0:18:40.000 --> 0:18:42.320 live his best life. You know, what the fuck does 0:18:42.359 --> 0:18:44.360 that mean? And then he kind of gets into it 0:18:45.119 --> 0:18:48.440 and it made sense in a way. It's like if 0:18:48.480 --> 0:18:52.600 he is really diving into his role as like a 0:18:52.760 --> 0:18:57.760 creator of another entity, and that gives him perspective of 0:18:57.760 --> 0:19:01.879 of himself, like as the god that created him, and 0:19:01.920 --> 0:19:05.920 how he wants to serve that God by not jacking 0:19:06.040 --> 0:19:09.680 off or eating shitty and whatnot. 0:19:09.760 --> 0:19:10.000 You know. 0:19:11.040 --> 0:19:14.359 I mean, look, obviously that method of living a better 0:19:14.400 --> 0:19:18.359 life is not going to appeal to everyone, but it 0:19:18.480 --> 0:19:21.600 is for talking to that guy. To me is further 0:19:23.480 --> 0:19:30.800 evidence of the creative ways in which people can come 0:19:30.880 --> 0:19:33.800 up with, can go through to kind of deal with 0:19:33.840 --> 0:19:41.080 their own ship. So props to tout to Tybee, thank 0:19:41.119 --> 0:19:43.119 you for calling. I think you're again for that drawing 0:19:43.160 --> 0:19:48.399 that shit is sick? Hello? Is this Morgan? This? 0:19:48.400 --> 0:19:49.000 This is her? 0:19:49.320 --> 0:19:49.679 Yes? 0:19:51.000 --> 0:19:53.919 What's what's going on with you? Morgan? What are you 0:19:54.040 --> 0:19:56.760 up to? What you know? 0:19:57.280 --> 0:20:00.320 I'm not gonna like I just got done having a 0:20:00.359 --> 0:20:03.119 little bit of a menty breakdown. 0:20:03.680 --> 0:20:06.600 A mental breaky. Okay, yeah, just like a. 0:20:06.600 --> 0:20:09.639 Little break everyone's got to break every once in a while. 0:20:10.200 --> 0:20:16.600 I fully agree. I think the the human capacity for 0:20:16.720 --> 0:20:21.879 stimulus and the amount of stimulus in the universe have 0:20:22.040 --> 0:20:26.600 not been keeping at good consistency with one another over 0:20:26.640 --> 0:20:31.520 the years, and so it's it's inevitable to have a 0:20:31.520 --> 0:20:37.119 a MENTI break ye every every now and then. Absolutely 0:20:37.560 --> 0:20:42.359 absolutely what has been the driver of your mental breakdown? 0:20:45.359 --> 0:20:49.960 So today, specifically, what I what I kind of called 0:20:50.000 --> 0:20:56.960 in about, is like, you ever feel sorry. I'm so nervous. 0:20:57.040 --> 0:20:59.360 I know you always say like after five minutes, I'll 0:20:59.400 --> 0:21:02.320 be fine. I believe you, but like, wow. 0:21:03.320 --> 0:21:05.639 No, no, no, it's just the phone. It's just the phone. 0:21:05.640 --> 0:21:06.520 It's not even real. 0:21:07.880 --> 0:21:10.320 It's just a phone. Well, listen, I've tried to call 0:21:10.400 --> 0:21:13.280 so many times, and I saw you in Philly, so like, 0:21:14.000 --> 0:21:15.000 I'm so excited. 0:21:16.119 --> 0:21:17.920 Oh hell yeah, I'm glad you had. What did you 0:21:17.960 --> 0:21:18.680 think of the show? 0:21:20.119 --> 0:21:23.320 It was great that woman sat on a cake, but 0:21:23.440 --> 0:21:27.440 I had to it like the end because we had 0:21:27.440 --> 0:21:30.400 to get our train back a kind. 0:21:30.200 --> 0:21:34.280 Of fucking okay, yeah that was fun. Well, I'm glad 0:21:34.280 --> 0:21:35.720 to see that you at least got to see the 0:21:35.720 --> 0:21:37.359 beginning of the woman sitting on a cake. 0:21:38.520 --> 0:21:40.560 Oh yes, yes, I did see her sit on a 0:21:40.560 --> 0:21:42.919 cake and she complimented my shoes in the bathroom. So 0:21:42.920 --> 0:21:46.159 that's that's amazing. That's like a w for me. 0:21:46.400 --> 0:21:48.720 So what is uh, what is driving your mental breakdown? 0:21:48.800 --> 0:21:49.040 Morgan? 0:21:51.720 --> 0:21:54.880 So do you ever feel like, I want to call 0:21:54.920 --> 0:21:58.720 it imposter syndrome kind of, but like you ever feel 0:21:59.520 --> 0:22:06.560 like your actions don't really like, I don't know, match 0:22:06.600 --> 0:22:10.600 your thoughts? Like everyone. What I told the screener was 0:22:11.320 --> 0:22:14.760 that I work with the elderly. I work in retirement home, 0:22:16.840 --> 0:22:20.120 and they all seem to like love me, like think 0:22:20.160 --> 0:22:22.000 I'm great, you know what I mean. I'm not trying 0:22:22.000 --> 0:22:23.119 to like suck my own dick or. 0:22:23.080 --> 0:22:25.800 Anything, but like, sure, suck your own deck all you want. 0:22:26.840 --> 0:22:29.399 They all appreciate what I do, I guess, and I 0:22:29.440 --> 0:22:31.440 love them. Then I want to take care of them. 0:22:31.640 --> 0:22:32.080 That's great. 0:22:32.080 --> 0:22:38.000 But sometimes like I feel like I'm not actually nice. 0:22:38.280 --> 0:22:43.679 Hmmm, Like okay, so your thoughts can I well, it 0:22:43.720 --> 0:22:47.879 says here that can I tell people what the what 0:22:47.920 --> 0:22:50.600 the call scrator wrote down? Okay, the call scrator wrote 0:22:50.640 --> 0:22:55.280 down that that Morgan works with old people and has 0:22:55.800 --> 0:23:01.440 quote horrible intrusive thoughts about them. 0:23:01.680 --> 0:23:07.520 Well that's pretty serious, Like, yeah, I do. 0:23:08.880 --> 0:23:11.880 Well, listen, Okay, they don't, you know what, Listen. Okay, 0:23:11.920 --> 0:23:15.520 here's the thing. Here's the thing is, I don't really 0:23:15.520 --> 0:23:18.680 care about like thoughts. Who really gives a shit. Thoughts 0:23:18.840 --> 0:23:23.720 are only worth anything when they become actions. Now, actions 0:23:23.960 --> 0:23:29.520 start as thoughts. So like, I think that whatever thoughts, 0:23:29.600 --> 0:23:33.840 I think, you're innocent to any thoughts that pops into 0:23:33.880 --> 0:23:38.680 your head until it becomes an action. So don't freak 0:23:38.760 --> 0:23:42.160 out about yourself about any thoughts that happen. And your 0:23:42.320 --> 0:23:50.920 humanity is the fact that you can act in uh, 0:23:51.119 --> 0:23:57.040 contradiction to your thoughts. So yeah, which of these old 0:23:57.080 --> 0:23:59.960 people are you thinking about murdering? 0:24:02.080 --> 0:24:06.080 I'm not, I'm not. I'm not planning any one's murder, 0:24:06.160 --> 0:24:10.159 I promise. And they are not sexual. I promise. That 0:24:10.200 --> 0:24:13.960 would be haunting for me, honestly. 0:24:14.440 --> 0:24:18.120 But it's just like. 0:24:20.040 --> 0:24:24.199 I love so I love working with them, and some 0:24:24.240 --> 0:24:29.320 of them have some like really bad dementia, sure, and like. 0:24:30.840 --> 0:24:31.359 It hurts. 0:24:31.640 --> 0:24:35.280 It hurts my heart sometimes and the place is sad, 0:24:35.480 --> 0:24:39.119 and we I do activities. I do therapeutic recreation. So 0:24:39.320 --> 0:24:43.000 like I kind of keep them moving, keep their brains thinking, 0:24:43.240 --> 0:24:46.080 do some bingo with them. I don't know. 0:24:47.600 --> 0:24:50.040 So good. So I mean, in what way do you 0:24:50.080 --> 0:24:54.200 feel like your thoughts are incongruent with your actions here? 0:24:56.000 --> 0:24:59.840 Like, because I get so mad, like not at them, 0:24:59.880 --> 0:25:04.159