WEBVTT - Who Are You Calling a "Geriatric" Mom? 0:00:05.559 --> 0:00:10.440 Hi, everybody, and welcome back to Katie's crib. In this episode, 0:00:11.160 --> 0:00:13.800 we are talking guys, I can't even I can't even 0:00:13.800 --> 0:00:16.759 say it seriously because it's it's it's so shouldn't be 0:00:17.960 --> 0:00:21.000 a thing, but it's a thing. We're talking to moms 0:00:21.000 --> 0:00:25.239 over the age of forty, women who had babies over forty, which, 0:00:25.239 --> 0:00:26.560 by the way, in case you guys didn't know, if 0:00:26.560 --> 0:00:28.400 you have a baby over the age of thirty five, 0:00:28.560 --> 0:00:31.840 it's called a geriatric pregnancy, So whatever asshole came up 0:00:31.880 --> 0:00:34.919 with that name, thank you so much. Definitely a man 0:00:35.280 --> 0:00:37.280 um so more and more women are waiting to have 0:00:37.360 --> 0:00:39.960 children later in their life for a variety of reasons. 0:00:40.560 --> 0:00:42.560 We're going to talk about what it's like, the good 0:00:42.600 --> 0:00:45.000 things and the challenges and some of the unique experiences 0:00:45.040 --> 0:00:47.120 that make up what it's like to be a mom 0:00:47.120 --> 0:00:50.800 over forty. So let's get started. And what's crazy is 0:00:50.840 --> 0:00:53.240 that this awesome group of women that we have collected 0:00:53.240 --> 0:00:56.440 are sort of like the Broadway women now that I 0:00:56.480 --> 0:00:59.040 am on Broadway, but sitting next to me, we have 0:00:59.280 --> 0:01:02.440 my dear dear friend Natasha Yvette Williams, who I share 0:01:02.480 --> 0:01:08.360 a dressing room with over at waitress. Those are the 0:01:08.400 --> 0:01:10.680 sweet sounds coming out of her voice because you guys, 0:01:10.720 --> 0:01:13.559 she plays Becky and waitress and she brings the entire 0:01:13.600 --> 0:01:17.080 house down every night. Um, she's really scary because I 0:01:17.120 --> 0:01:18.720 do a huge vogal warm up and I asked her 0:01:18.720 --> 0:01:20.080 how do you warm up for your big song? And 0:01:20.120 --> 0:01:22.160 she said, I have a pepsi And that's how I 0:01:22.240 --> 0:01:26.760 knew I was in big trouble now. Um. We have 0:01:26.959 --> 0:01:31.399 also here Rachel Sklar, who is also affiliated with the 0:01:31.480 --> 0:01:34.920 Broadway because she is in a BMI workshop right now 0:01:35.000 --> 0:01:38.680 on being a lyricist, which is super exciting. Hi Rachel, 0:01:38.760 --> 0:01:43.960 Hi Rachel. We met through a mutual friend, Yes, yes 0:01:44.000 --> 0:01:47.880 we did. Um Jamie Jamie Selter, who you guys. Jamie 0:01:48.520 --> 0:01:51.720 is a guest on the Milestones episode and goes way 0:01:51.720 --> 0:01:54.320 back with my husband and me. But I was emailing 0:01:54.320 --> 0:01:56.160 her like, who do you know that's like a kick 0:01:56.200 --> 0:01:58.400 ass mom in her forties and she was like, oh, 0:01:58.480 --> 0:02:03.720 hello Brooklyn, guys, Oh please don't be sorry. We're moms. 0:02:03.760 --> 0:02:09.680 We can't even remember to self, we can't Natasha's cellphones dead, 0:02:10.560 --> 0:02:16.959 Jennifer's cellphones on. Um. Yeah, I was reaching out to 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:18.600 Jamie like I need moms in their four days and 0:02:18.639 --> 0:02:20.880 she was like, well, you have to meet Rachel. Duh, 0:02:21.080 --> 0:02:22.840 it's so nice to meet you in person. Thank you 0:02:22.840 --> 0:02:25.640 for having me. Um. And then our last amazing guest 0:02:25.720 --> 0:02:29.480 is Jennifer Bullock and she joins us today. Is also 0:02:29.560 --> 0:02:35.120 a Broadway mama. Um, and she is actually here with 0:02:35.120 --> 0:02:38.680 her sweet sweet daughter Brooklyn, who um. If you guys 0:02:38.720 --> 0:02:41.520 hear her at any point she made, Brooklyn might be 0:02:41.520 --> 0:02:46.120 coming in and out definitely screaming. She's almost too so yes, 0:02:46.639 --> 0:02:49.760 so real quick, let's go around, Natasha. How old are 0:02:49.760 --> 0:02:52.119 your kids and how old were you when you had them? 0:02:52.120 --> 0:02:55.080 My kids are seven years. I have a set of twins, 0:02:55.320 --> 0:02:59.519 boy girl twins that are seven and I've had them 0:02:59.560 --> 0:03:05.920 at four. Yes, you look incredible, Oh my god. Okay, 0:03:05.919 --> 0:03:09.280 and Rachel you Um, it's just me. I'm a single mom. 0:03:09.480 --> 0:03:11.760 I have a daughter named Ruby who's almost three and 0:03:11.760 --> 0:03:14.880 a half. And I got knocked up at forty one 0:03:15.080 --> 0:03:18.919 had a forty two. It was not planned, but it 0:03:19.000 --> 0:03:25.040 was fortuitous. And what about you, Jennifer. Um, I got 0:03:25.080 --> 0:03:29.040 pregnant after like a lot of trying at forty four 0:03:29.200 --> 0:03:32.760 via IVF and had her. Um, you know, from when 0:03:32.760 --> 0:03:34.079 I was forty three and had her when I was 0:03:34.200 --> 0:03:41.440 forty four. Ladies, let's give us all around and applause, right, um, 0:03:41.480 --> 0:03:46.160 so all three of you, Um, it wasn't a surrogate 0:03:46.200 --> 0:03:49.520 adoption situation. All three of you guys actually got Oh 0:03:49.560 --> 0:03:53.080 you had IVF you said, yeah, right, Um? How many 0:03:53.160 --> 0:03:58.119 rounds did it take? Just one? I'm super lucky. That's great. Um. 0:03:58.160 --> 0:04:01.240 And for you guys, did you for Rachel Natasha? Did 0:04:01.240 --> 0:04:04.400 you guys have challenges conceiving? And was the doctor very 0:04:04.480 --> 0:04:06.720 much like, well, you're old and that's why, or like, 0:04:07.800 --> 0:04:10.040 I mean, I may have had challenges conceiving that I 0:04:10.080 --> 0:04:14.760 wasn't aware of, but apparently not forty one years old 0:04:15.720 --> 0:04:18.919 and old fashioned. You got straight up knocked up, straight 0:04:19.000 --> 0:04:23.080 up knocked up fairly soon into the relationship, which was 0:04:23.080 --> 0:04:29.080 short lived by my account of the calendar. Um, and uh, yeah, 0:04:29.240 --> 0:04:31.200 I guess, uh you know, what can I say? I 0:04:31.360 --> 0:04:34.400 just had the womb of a of a non geriatric woman, 0:04:34.440 --> 0:04:38.000 I guess. And you decided, I mean you wanted to 0:04:38.080 --> 0:04:39.680 keep or you wanted to be a mom, like oh yeah, 0:04:39.800 --> 0:04:43.480 you know, like when you got pregnant, did you know 0:04:43.640 --> 0:04:47.560 already that the relationship may not work or work in inkling? 0:04:49.480 --> 0:04:51.880 But I always knew that I want to be a 0:04:51.880 --> 0:04:53.640 mom I had had previously. This happened when I was 0:04:53.680 --> 0:04:55.920 forty one, and during my whole forty year I had 0:04:55.960 --> 0:04:59.400 this like quiet internal existential crisis about did I miss 0:04:59.440 --> 0:05:01.080 the boat? What am I gonna do? How am I 0:05:01.080 --> 0:05:04.159 going to make this happen? You need willing sperm in 0:05:04.240 --> 0:05:07.279 order for this to happen. It is difficult to come 0:05:07.320 --> 0:05:13.960 by often, um, particularly as a single, unpartnered person, And 0:05:13.960 --> 0:05:15.960 and it was expensive otherwise, and I wasn't in a 0:05:16.000 --> 0:05:20.240 position to bankroller or even really honestly think about it. 0:05:20.240 --> 0:05:25.640 It was just so this was dumb luck. Wow, the 0:05:25.720 --> 0:05:30.400 dumbest luck. Wow wow. And um really quick to go 0:05:30.440 --> 0:05:32.880 back to you, Jennifer, like you had you been trying? 0:05:32.920 --> 0:05:34.640 Were you a relationship for a really long time? You 0:05:34.680 --> 0:05:36.919 had been trying for a while. Did you start trying 0:05:37.080 --> 0:05:41.719 after forty? Yeah? So I actually got pregnant at forty 0:05:42.040 --> 0:05:45.920 and had a miscarriage, and um, then I got pregnant 0:05:46.120 --> 0:05:49.960 really soon after that again um, and had another risk carriage. 0:05:50.480 --> 0:05:54.719 And then from there nothing just went, you know, into 0:05:55.440 --> 0:05:58.520 you did have difficulties conceiving. Did your doctor along the 0:05:58.560 --> 0:06:05.280 way say blame your age? UM. Initially no, I was 0:06:05.320 --> 0:06:07.560 living in the Midwest at the time, or actually, sorry, 0:06:07.600 --> 0:06:10.000 I was in d C. And I was seeing a 0:06:10.080 --> 0:06:12.839 doctor there who was like, hey, let's do a panel. 0:06:12.880 --> 0:06:15.039 Let's figure out what's going on with your body. Let's see, 0:06:15.080 --> 0:06:17.560 you know, if maybe you have a clouding issue or 0:06:17.600 --> 0:06:21.479 if there's something going on. So they did kind of say, 0:06:21.520 --> 0:06:23.960 you know, age could be a factor, but it wasn't 0:06:24.000 --> 0:06:28.000 like this is the factor. So we went and did 0:06:28.040 --> 0:06:30.440 a panel and did find some things that were wrong. 0:06:30.480 --> 0:06:33.120 I had did have a clouding disorder. I had UM. 0:06:33.440 --> 0:06:38.440 Also an ability folic acid I can't it's antif hr 0:06:39.279 --> 0:06:42.800 luck right g mutation, So I had that too UM 0:06:42.960 --> 0:06:45.560 And then I thought, okay, well we'll fix those problems. 0:06:45.560 --> 0:06:49.039 Started trying again and nothing, and then I finally went 0:06:49.120 --> 0:06:52.760 to see a specialist who specializes in mini IVF, which 0:06:52.839 --> 0:06:57.280 is actually four older women. The theory behind it is 0:06:57.320 --> 0:07:00.760 that IVF gives you a whole lot of drugs, which 0:07:00.760 --> 0:07:04.000 creates a whole live eggs. Like shaking an apple tree. 0:07:04.040 --> 0:07:06.599 You're gonna get unripe apples. You're gonna get apples. That 0:07:07.200 --> 0:07:09.640 apple You're just gonna shake it, and everything's gonna fall 0:07:09.640 --> 0:07:12.480 on the ground and that's what you're gonna get. Um, 0:07:12.680 --> 0:07:14.840 And he was saying that a lot of what you 0:07:14.960 --> 0:07:17.320 get in an IVF cycle and an older woman is 0:07:17.400 --> 0:07:19.640 unusable eggs. So he said, rather than give you all 0:07:19.680 --> 0:07:21.680 of that medicine, we're gonna give you just a couple 0:07:21.680 --> 0:07:23.960 of drugs to create the best eggs possible. And even 0:07:24.000 --> 0:07:28.240 though we'll only get a couple, those will be the best. 0:07:28.880 --> 0:07:33.520 So yeah. So um, anyway, so that was our journey 0:07:34.320 --> 0:07:38.640 and uh and yeah, and it was pretty awesome. And 0:07:39.480 --> 0:07:41.960 like I said, we got pregnant right away. Um, we're 0:07:42.000 --> 0:07:45.040 really lucky. And what about you, Nitasha, I had lots 0:07:45.080 --> 0:07:51.160 of problems. I miscarried as well. It's not that part, 0:07:51.400 --> 0:07:57.800 but I miscarried twice and I, um, but my doctor 0:07:58.000 --> 0:08:00.240 did not tell me it was my age. She don't 0:08:00.240 --> 0:08:03.520 my weight because I'm overweight. Um, she talked about my weight. 0:08:03.560 --> 0:08:06.840 And then we also I also got tested and I 0:08:06.880 --> 0:08:09.800 found out I had a blocked ovary. Only one of 0:08:09.800 --> 0:08:14.600 my ovaries worked or whatever or was open um. So 0:08:14.640 --> 0:08:16.400 then we did some flushing and we did a whole 0:08:16.440 --> 0:08:19.200 bunch of other stuff. Um. But I had gotten pregnant 0:08:19.240 --> 0:08:21.600 prior to that and miscarried so I knew that I 0:08:21.600 --> 0:08:23.600 could get pregnant, but just carrying it was the thing 0:08:23.640 --> 0:08:27.480 for me. And then it took like seven years and nothing. 0:08:27.520 --> 0:08:31.480 We were trying and nothing. So then I took some um, 0:08:31.720 --> 0:08:34.240 something called cloe mid trying to some kind of drug 0:08:34.280 --> 0:08:37.480 that fertility drug to help your eggs come out UM, 0:08:37.760 --> 0:08:43.800 and that's I think. So yeah, but I you know, 0:08:43.840 --> 0:08:46.600 I was having such difficulty for that stretch that I 0:08:46.640 --> 0:08:49.520 thought they weren't going to run in this family. I 0:08:49.559 --> 0:08:53.120 had a miscarriage to at thirty five, and the doctor 0:08:53.240 --> 0:08:55.920 was definitely she only said it once, but you won't 0:08:55.960 --> 0:08:59.520 forget it, which is she said, like, well, you know, 0:08:59.760 --> 0:09:04.679 there is just sometimes splitting gets I guess when the 0:09:04.679 --> 0:09:07.200 embryo or the chromosomes are splitting or that. She's like, 0:09:07.200 --> 0:09:09.360 you know, we don't know for sure yet, but like 0:09:10.040 --> 0:09:13.360 that doesn't seem to go as easily or smoothly when 0:09:13.440 --> 0:09:18.559 you're older. And I was like, say what, um, especially 0:09:18.559 --> 0:09:22.760 because I feel like, you know, we are coming into 0:09:22.760 --> 0:09:24.839 this time where there's just there's a lot I mean, 0:09:24.880 --> 0:09:28.280 we're just not getting married off at thirteen. We're just 0:09:28.320 --> 0:09:32.400 not We are told, you know, but we're told like 0:09:32.480 --> 0:09:34.680 you can have it all, you know, So you're like, 0:09:34.800 --> 0:09:36.600 hold up, if I'm supposed to have it all and 0:09:36.600 --> 0:09:38.680 I'm supposed to have this career and I'm supposed to 0:09:39.559 --> 0:09:41.719 focus on me and be a badass and get this 0:09:41.760 --> 0:09:45.439 whole career happening, than marry the right person, find a 0:09:45.559 --> 0:09:48.600 partner and all of these things, Like how am I 0:09:48.600 --> 0:09:51.120 going to get that all done by a certain age 0:09:51.160 --> 0:09:53.560 to then be a mom? I mean, it's just it's 0:09:53.559 --> 0:09:58.200 a lot. Can we go around and talk about how 0:09:58.240 --> 0:10:02.840 your pregnancy was as as being in you like, did 0:10:02.880 --> 0:10:05.839 you feel I mean, I think you can feel like 0:10:05.880 --> 0:10:09.040 shit at any age pregnant, but but were you told 0:10:09.120 --> 0:10:11.200 or do you think your pregnancy was different in any way? 0:10:11.240 --> 0:10:13.600 I know that they do actually do different sort of testing, 0:10:14.400 --> 0:10:16.640 right and watch you differently? What do you Rachel's give 0:10:16.679 --> 0:10:18.120 me if you're looking at me? So I'm just gonna 0:10:18.160 --> 0:10:22.680 go first. I'm short. I had a shockingly uneventful pregnancy. 0:10:22.760 --> 0:10:25.400 For my first time in the office, I you know, 0:10:25.480 --> 0:10:27.880 I was told I was geriatric. I found that amusing, 0:10:27.920 --> 0:10:30.720 But that was literally the only time that I was 0:10:30.840 --> 0:10:33.480 treated like I was old. I'm in New York. I 0:10:33.520 --> 0:10:36.439 went to downtown O b G Y n uh down 0:10:36.480 --> 0:10:41.440 in Soho. They were completely unfazed. Nobody treated me like 0:10:41.480 --> 0:10:44.840 I was anything other than what they had seen many times. Yeah, 0:10:44.960 --> 0:10:48.720 I just everything. I had a very I was very lucky. 0:10:48.760 --> 0:10:54.920 I had a very good, happy, easy pregnancy. I you know, 0:10:55.040 --> 0:10:58.160 I just I had this adorable bumps it was. I 0:10:58.200 --> 0:11:02.520 was before I have told myself, like, don't get crazy 0:11:02.559 --> 0:11:04.760 if you put on weight, like, don't get like, just like, 0:11:04.800 --> 0:11:06.679 whatever happens, you're going to deal with it, like you 0:11:06.720 --> 0:11:09.640 have this baby, You're so lucky. But also for the 0:11:09.760 --> 0:11:12.120 through the first trimester, like every day, I just like, 0:11:12.160 --> 0:11:13.559 please just make it through the day. Please just make 0:11:13.559 --> 0:11:15.439 it through the day, because I knew what the risks 0:11:15.520 --> 0:11:18.080 for and I knew I was lucky. I knew this 0:11:18.120 --> 0:11:22.120 was a miracle baby. And by the time, I mean 0:11:22.240 --> 0:11:25.920 I like, I was not no longer with or on 0:11:26.880 --> 0:11:30.800 very good terms with with my child's father, sort of 0:11:31.320 --> 0:11:34.920 probably halfway through the first trimester. So this was the one. 0:11:35.280 --> 0:11:37.360 There wasn't there wasn't there were no more kicks that 0:11:37.440 --> 0:11:43.480 this particular can with this particular persona so um so Yeah, 0:11:43.480 --> 0:11:45.280 So I just I did. I had a really wonderful, 0:11:45.440 --> 0:11:49.240 lucky pregnancy, and I didn't you know. The only the 0:11:49.240 --> 0:11:53.439 only thing that that um went awry was when it 0:11:53.480 --> 0:11:55.800 came time for delivery, and uh, you know, I had 0:11:55.880 --> 0:11:58.319 to vary a diva cervix that didn't you know, I 0:11:58.440 --> 0:12:00.960 just didn't want to open, and so I ended up 0:12:00.960 --> 0:12:03.320 having a c section at the last minute. But I 0:12:03.360 --> 0:12:05.839 mean otherwise everything was great, you know, knocking all the 0:12:05.880 --> 0:12:13.640 wood all about. I had a horrible time. I was 0:12:13.679 --> 0:12:18.960 sick every day from the first day I even know 0:12:19.080 --> 0:12:22.839 I was pregnant, un till the child until they took 0:12:22.880 --> 0:12:26.960 the babies out. Um, I was on my floor in 0:12:27.000 --> 0:12:31.120 the bathroom because the tie was cold. Um, just sleeping 0:12:31.280 --> 0:12:33.720 every day almost I was on it every day, but 0:12:33.760 --> 0:12:35.920 I was in the majority of the time. I mean 0:12:36.000 --> 0:12:37.760 my husband would come home and know where I knew 0:12:37.760 --> 0:12:39.520 where I was on the bathroom floor, and he was 0:12:39.559 --> 0:12:41.480 like good. I was like, yep, I'm good, and I 0:12:41.559 --> 0:12:44.760 just sort of stayed there. Um. Do you think that 0:12:44.800 --> 0:12:46.640 had anything to do with age or just well? No, 0:12:46.760 --> 0:12:49.480 I think well I think looking back now, mind, you 0:12:49.520 --> 0:12:53.160 haven't never carried a baby up until except for the twins, 0:12:53.480 --> 0:12:56.240 for any length of time, and I think it was 0:12:56.240 --> 0:13:01.240 because it was twins. I had a horrible doctor as well, 0:13:02.120 --> 0:13:06.960 who made me feel awful and everything that I called 0:13:07.040 --> 0:13:11.240 and said, oh my vagina is clicking, I'm okay, you're 0:13:11.440 --> 0:13:13.679 I'm fifteen weeks. I was fifteen weeks because yes, at 0:13:13.679 --> 0:13:17.679 that first tribemester, I'm just especially after having a couple 0:13:17.679 --> 0:13:20.520 of misscaverages, I'm like, just please, can I just get 0:13:20.559 --> 0:13:23.880 to twelve weeks? You know? Um? So I got to 0:13:23.960 --> 0:13:27.680 fifteen and then my body started clicking. I was walking 0:13:27.720 --> 0:13:31.040 and making noises and a little bit of pain, and 0:13:31.080 --> 0:13:33.480 so I called the doctor and she would be like, yeah, 0:13:33.520 --> 0:13:35.880 you're pregnant. That's basically it, you know what I mean, 0:13:35.920 --> 0:13:39.199 that kind of that's the I had. So um, yeah, 0:13:39.240 --> 0:13:40.800 I should have left, but I didn't even know enough 0:13:40.840 --> 0:13:43.600 to leave, you know what I mean. So at thirteen weeks, 0:13:43.760 --> 0:13:46.079 she said, oh, we're gonna have a c section. There's 0:13:46.240 --> 0:13:48.360 I mean, I had maybe one test prior to that, 0:13:48.520 --> 0:13:51.880 and I'm like, but can we just she said, no, 0:13:51.920 --> 0:13:53.760 you're gonna have twins, and so we're just gonna You're 0:13:53.760 --> 0:13:57.200 gonna have a C section. And I was like, oh, okay, um, 0:13:57.200 --> 0:14:00.480 because I didn't again, I didn't know enough to ask 0:14:00.520 --> 0:14:03.880 any questions. Older mom, but ignorant you know, in terms 0:14:03.960 --> 0:14:06.000 of my body and what it does, because I really 0:14:06.000 --> 0:14:08.880 didn't even want kids for until I turned that thirty 0:14:08.880 --> 0:14:11.760 eight maybe, and then all of a sudden it was everything, 0:14:12.000 --> 0:14:15.000 you know, it was I woke up, Oh my god, 0:14:15.160 --> 0:14:19.200 I'm yes, and is this all there is? Basically, you know, 0:14:19.400 --> 0:14:21.720 I'm doing what I want to do. I'm you know, 0:14:21.720 --> 0:14:24.640 I'm having my career or whatever. But this is there 0:14:24.680 --> 0:14:25.920 got to be more to it than this. And then 0:14:26.240 --> 0:14:29.680 from that moment on it was about me giving to 0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:33.160 someone else, you know. Um so, but yes, the pregnancy 0:14:33.160 --> 0:14:37.240 itself was very difficult, and as my body changed weekly, 0:14:38.880 --> 0:14:44.280 I did not have a doctor that helped me through 0:14:44.360 --> 0:14:47.640 that and understand that and all the stuff I was findings, 0:14:47.640 --> 0:14:50.920 Oh this means you're you have diabetes or this meslah blah, 0:14:51.040 --> 0:14:52.480 and I didn't have any of those things. But I 0:14:52.840 --> 0:14:59.440 did have um, morning sickness every day, um every day. 0:14:59.520 --> 0:15:02.320 And yes, what about you, Jennifer, how do you feel 0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:06.560 how your pregnancy? Um? My pregnancy was pretty smooth and easy. However, 0:15:06.840 --> 0:15:09.360 I was pregnant in the Midwest, so I did not 0:15:09.560 --> 0:15:12.880 have the same kind of yeah cool whatever experience. They 0:15:12.920 --> 0:15:16.280 were you treated old like scared where they like by 0:15:16.680 --> 0:15:20.920 like this is like a miracle if you survive kind 0:15:20.920 --> 0:15:23.920 of Yeah. I mean my doctor was great. I don't 0:15:23.960 --> 0:15:26.800 mean that I had a bad doctor, but the general 0:15:27.120 --> 0:15:31.200 kind of energy. Yeah, the general like feeling when I 0:15:31.240 --> 0:15:35.160 went in there, I was like, whoa, She's alive, still here, 0:15:35.680 --> 0:15:38.880 still kick in. Um. So that part was did they 0:15:38.920 --> 0:15:41.800 have you do extra testing? Yeah? They did. They considered 0:15:41.840 --> 0:15:43.880 me just super high risk because I had the Linen 0:15:44.000 --> 0:15:46.960 factor five, I had the m f mt h f 0:15:47.120 --> 0:15:49.120 r G mutation, so and I was I V Yeah. 0:15:49.240 --> 0:15:52.640 So those three things together was like, were you so 0:15:52.720 --> 0:15:55.360 scared the whole time? I mean that must compound on itself, 0:15:55.440 --> 0:15:58.800 like you know I was, and I wasn't just because 0:15:59.000 --> 0:16:01.720 I was like you know what, I'm a Broadway chick, 0:16:01.880 --> 0:16:05.160 like we keep good like we we're young at hard 0:16:07.040 --> 0:16:11.200 We're not you might I might be like physically old, 0:16:11.280 --> 0:16:14.560 but I'm feeling like I'm okay. Plus I was in 0:16:14.600 --> 0:16:16.800 the fitness field, so I was you know, I had 0:16:16.800 --> 0:16:19.480 been working out regularly but prior to my pregnancy, and 0:16:19.520 --> 0:16:21.560 I was working out through my pregnancy, so I was 0:16:21.600 --> 0:16:25.840 doing things to help myself. Um. But yeah, so anyway, 0:16:25.880 --> 0:16:29.600 there were lots of extra tests. Um. There was just 0:16:29.680 --> 0:16:32.200 a general kind of theme of let's cross our fingers 0:16:32.240 --> 0:16:35.000 and hope that you get through it. And um, I 0:16:35.040 --> 0:16:37.440 did have morning sickness, but it kind of waned after 0:16:37.480 --> 0:16:39.440 the three months, which was good. And then after that 0:16:39.520 --> 0:16:42.640 I felt pretty well. I didn't have any complications of 0:16:42.640 --> 0:16:46.720 any sort. Um. My doctor threw a curveball at me 0:16:46.760 --> 0:16:49.080 at like thirty eight weeks, was like, we're going to 0:16:49.200 --> 0:16:53.320 induce you next week. And I had been like I 0:16:53.360 --> 0:16:55.840 wanted to go into labor naturally, like I was trying. 0:16:55.880 --> 0:16:58.360 I wanted to be naturally, wanted to go into labor naturally. 0:16:58.360 --> 0:17:00.240 I wanted to just kind of try to not have 0:17:00.280 --> 0:17:02.760 any drugs. So that one was a little like I had. 0:17:02.800 --> 0:17:05.320 The same thing happened, and it was because of my age. Again, 0:17:06.240 --> 0:17:11.240 I think I think there's I think actually, and I 0:17:11.280 --> 0:17:12.960 don't know because we don't have a documents episode, but 0:17:13.040 --> 0:17:15.560 I think there is. I think there are Actually, when 0:17:15.600 --> 0:17:18.840 you're above thirty five, certain insurance companies do require you 0:17:18.920 --> 0:17:23.199 to do extra testing. I think that that come with 0:17:23.240 --> 0:17:25.600 your insurance package of being pregnant or whatever above a 0:17:25.640 --> 0:17:31.960 certain age. I'm pretty sure, but that yeah, yeah, yeah, 0:17:32.040 --> 0:17:35.760 thirty five geriatric test that could hurt your baby too, 0:17:35.800 --> 0:17:39.040 you know what I mean that they amniotic strongly recommend 0:17:39.080 --> 0:17:41.600 you take and right do you remember? I did not. 0:17:43.480 --> 0:17:48.719 I felt like the other tests had made me sufficiently confident. 0:17:48.840 --> 0:17:50.439 I mean, who could be confident in anything? But I 0:17:50.480 --> 0:17:51.960 sort of made my piece with that that I didn't. 0:17:52.040 --> 0:17:55.640 I I felt I was so shaky about that first 0:17:55.640 --> 0:17:59.040 trimester and you know the delicate balance of just getting 0:17:59.040 --> 0:18:02.040 through it, that I was like, I'm not I'm not 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:08.200 interfering with that ecosystem. Yeah. I I was told around 0:18:08.320 --> 0:18:13.120 thirty eight or nine weeks that Albie's stomach was not 0:18:13.280 --> 0:18:15.159 growing at the percentage rate that they wanted him to. 0:18:15.240 --> 0:18:16.840 And so they said the same to me, like you're 0:18:16.880 --> 0:18:19.439 not going a day over forty weeks, we're gonna induce you. 0:18:19.480 --> 0:18:22.280 And I was so pissed because I of course had 0:18:22.320 --> 0:18:25.200 this birth plan in my head of like, the baby's 0:18:25.240 --> 0:18:27.680 going to go into labor naturally and he's going to 0:18:27.800 --> 0:18:31.439 decide his birth date, dime into astrology, all this hippie 0:18:31.440 --> 0:18:35.720 dippie crap um. But he said the specialist in l A, 0:18:35.800 --> 0:18:38.360 like the number one guy, was like, oh no, no, 0:18:38.640 --> 0:18:42.399 you're thirty five, You're not going a day over over 0:18:42.440 --> 0:18:46.480 your forty week mark, um, which you know that's like 0:18:46.480 --> 0:18:49.520 a super you know, in in Europe and Canada and 0:18:49.520 --> 0:18:51.880 things like that, they actually have like labor windows where 0:18:51.880 --> 0:18:55.560 it's like they're they're good within three weeks early or 0:18:55.600 --> 0:18:58.359 forty two weeks late, whatever. But here in the States, 0:18:58.359 --> 0:19:00.840 it's very much like this date. Um, So, I was 0:19:00.880 --> 0:19:03.560 induced and it was totally because of my age, um 0:19:03.600 --> 0:19:07.760 because he came out completely fine. But um so, um 0:19:07.960 --> 0:19:12.960 did you guys? Yeah, I got yes, I had a 0:19:13.119 --> 0:19:15.119 like a surgery, like I went to sleep. Oh yes, 0:19:15.280 --> 0:19:17.600 she had one of those labors that we talked about 0:19:17.640 --> 0:19:21.560 on this podcast. Yeah. In season one are my Obi 0:19:21.720 --> 0:19:23.240 was like, oh yeah, it could even get so bad 0:19:23.280 --> 0:19:26.320 that they knock you out for your favor for a 0:19:26.359 --> 0:19:28.160 twelve hours. And I met the person that they did 0:19:28.160 --> 0:19:30.159 that too, and it's Natasha. I didn't meet my babies 0:19:30.240 --> 0:19:33.320 until twelve hours later. But um, and I didn't find 0:19:33.359 --> 0:19:37.800 out that's how you story boy, a boy and a girl. 0:19:37.800 --> 0:19:39.520 I didn't know their sexiest prior to two. I didn't 0:19:39.520 --> 0:19:41.760 want to know their sexiest so um because I was 0:19:41.800 --> 0:19:43.400 waiting on the doctor to say it's a boy, it's 0:19:43.400 --> 0:19:45.399 a girl. I really wanted that, sure, and I did 0:19:45.440 --> 0:19:48.080 that to happen. But anyway, so that didn't happen because 0:19:48.119 --> 0:19:50.800 my epidural didn't work. So because I have a my 0:19:51.320 --> 0:19:53.919 spine is bent or something. So anyway, they couldn't get 0:19:53.920 --> 0:19:56.119 the epidural to work because I wanted drugs. I did 0:19:56.240 --> 0:19:59.119 want drugs and I wanted to just be awake to 0:19:59.200 --> 0:20:02.520 hear them say what was But anyway, Um, but anyway, 0:20:02.560 --> 0:20:04.720 that didn't work. So then they had to put me 0:20:04.720 --> 0:20:06.480 to sleep. But did they ask you? Did they say 0:20:06.480 --> 0:20:08.240 we're going to be putting you under I mean I don't. 0:20:08.359 --> 0:20:10.879 They said they have to. They told me they have 0:20:10.960 --> 0:20:13.560 to put me to sleep because the door didn't work 0:20:13.800 --> 0:20:16.000 and we had waited too long for anything else I 0:20:16.040 --> 0:20:20.560 think to work. So um, but the day prior to that, 0:20:20.640 --> 0:20:23.800 my I had them at thirty seven weeks. Um, but 0:20:23.880 --> 0:20:27.040 I had a scheduled c section at forty weeks. But 0:20:27.080 --> 0:20:29.280 when I went in, you know at that time, you're 0:20:29.280 --> 0:20:32.440 going in weekly or whatever, and um, one of them 0:20:32.480 --> 0:20:35.720 was sitting on the other or smushing Baby A, was 0:20:35.760 --> 0:20:41.080 smushing baby B. And then they so then they said 0:20:41.119 --> 0:20:42.920 tomorrow you have to come and let's take her out, 0:20:43.160 --> 0:20:46.919 take them out now, um, tomorrow. So that was my 0:20:47.320 --> 0:20:49.840 So they induced you give you that you tried to 0:20:49.880 --> 0:20:52.320 do it and no, no, no, they didn't induce me. 0:20:52.480 --> 0:20:54.560 They I didn't try to do it. I was always 0:20:54.600 --> 0:20:57.160 going to do a C section from thirteen weeks, not 0:20:57.200 --> 0:20:59.159 by choice, but that's what my doctor told me that 0:20:59.200 --> 0:21:01.040 I had to do because as I was having twins. 0:21:01.520 --> 0:21:04.600 That's what she told me. Um. So I knew I 0:21:04.640 --> 0:21:06.879 was having a c section, but it was just supposed 0:21:06.880 --> 0:21:08.399 to be two weeks later than me going in and 0:21:08.400 --> 0:21:10.600 send them saying, oh no, this baby is you know, 0:21:10.800 --> 0:21:13.600 getting smashed, so let's take them out, um at thirty 0:21:13.640 --> 0:21:16.800 seven weeks. Ever, fine, they were fine. They stayed in 0:21:16.800 --> 0:21:20.680 the nick for a while. But I'm saying, you know, so, 0:21:22.520 --> 0:21:27.400 what kind of um like going from what I also 0:21:27.440 --> 0:21:30.000 think is crazy about having a baby in your forties 0:21:30.440 --> 0:21:32.600 and thirty five. I'm just gonna let myself in with 0:21:32.640 --> 0:21:36.440 you guys, UM is that you've already been an adult 0:21:36.480 --> 0:21:38.840 doing your own crap for like a really long time, 0:21:39.080 --> 0:21:40.919 Like you know what I mean? Like I think there 0:21:40.920 --> 0:21:42.960 are people who have babies in their early twenties or 0:21:42.960 --> 0:21:44.960 they were mid twenties, and like, come on, let's be honest, 0:21:45.000 --> 0:21:50.000 they still don't even like really, I mean, you're they're 0:21:50.040 --> 0:21:52.199 just becoming adults themselves, you know what I mean. Like 0:21:52.240 --> 0:21:55.000 we're sitting here and like we all had careers when 0:21:55.040 --> 0:21:58.440 we were working double the adult time, double the adult time. 0:21:58.920 --> 0:22:02.600 So like was it's such a shock for you guys, 0:22:02.680 --> 0:22:05.720