Speaker 1: If you thought four hours a day, minutes a week
Speaker 1: was enough, think again. He's the last remnants of the
Speaker 1: old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats crackheads
Speaker 1: in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich pill
Speaker 1: poppers in the penthouse. The Clearinghouse of Hot takes break
Speaker 1: free for something special. The Fifth Hour with Ben Maller
Speaker 1: starts right now that it does, and welcome in. We
Speaker 1: are in the air everywhere the vast power of I
Speaker 1: Heart Podcasting and the I heart podcast Network, the global
Speaker 1: reach you obviously found the podcast were available wherever you
Speaker 1: get podcast. Don't forget if you haven't subscribed yet, click
Speaker 1: that little subscribe button up there on your your device,
Speaker 1: because that does help us out. So click the subscribe
Speaker 1: button and give us a review and let us know
Speaker 1: what you think, the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Speaker 1: The more stars, the merrier I did see. We got
Speaker 1: a few more reviews, a few more that came in,
Speaker 1: which is which is good. We we brought this up
Speaker 1: last week again, joined by for better or Worse, the
Speaker 1: man known as Gagon in the hallways. He does not
Speaker 1: know how to park, but he apparently knows how to talk.
Speaker 1: David Gascon is right there very so often. Yes, Now
Speaker 1: the reviews are in, the talies are up. So we
Speaker 1: had a over under of seven on on critical feedback
Speaker 1: onto Apple iTunes. So what the tally? Right now? What
Speaker 1: do we got? What's the what were we at well
Speaker 1: last week where we had two reviews or two two
Speaker 1: two oh two? Yeah, hold on, let me check. Oh,
Speaker 1: I think we're all. I think we pushed. It looks
Speaker 1: like we got seven. Uh, we only got seven. That's good. Yeah,
Speaker 1: right on the money. Let's see what some of the
Speaker 1: newest ones are and we'll read these stubble Smeg, I
Speaker 1: don't think that's the real name. I love Big Ben,
Speaker 1: makes me laugh, makes me think, makes me relax and
Speaker 1: have a little fun. I'm in Flyover Country and not
Speaker 1: into local soil Cow sports scene. But as humor resonates
Speaker 1: with me, do we do a local southern California sports show?
Speaker 1: Guest conner, I thought this is a national a well
Speaker 1: to be fair, unless like the Dodgers are collapsing in
Speaker 1: the game sevenal World Series, or like the Clippers are
Speaker 1: in the play. Yeah, but I like, I don't like
Speaker 1: obsessed with that stuff. I mean, I try not to.
Speaker 1: Maybe I remember I do too much. Let me know.
Speaker 1: I mean I I talked about a lot of ship.
Speaker 1: I don't really particularly have a passionate. Well it's not
Speaker 1: I don't have a passion about it, but it's not.
Speaker 1: It's not the very top of my my watch list,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. Yeah. And the other thing, too,
Speaker 1: is like some of the elements that we have talked about,
Speaker 1: or at least you have on your show, like they're
Speaker 1: pretty fucking polarizing, like the Dodgers losing back to back
Speaker 1: world series with the Houston Nastros coming into play, um,
Speaker 1: the Rams collapsing in the Super Bowl and then just
Speaker 1: throwing up a goose egg the following season and not
Speaker 1: using Todd like those are things load management with Kwaide
Speaker 1: Leonard like those are things that really jumped out on
Speaker 1: a national platform. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, absolutely more reviews.
Speaker 1: Danny in the o C he listened to the podcast
Speaker 1: with Hacks. I say his memories of Hacks are good
Speaker 1: to hear Hacks on with the Nocturnal Colonel. Thank you
Speaker 1: for that. Uh, let's see her Continental and Escalades. I'm
Speaker 1: sure that's his real name. Also right, and says Ben
Speaker 1: Mallor the only podcast that made me download the I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio app and listen to all my podcasts and
Speaker 1: I heart radio. Do you hear that? I heart Radio
Speaker 1: management I have we have the great Continentals and Escalades,
Speaker 1: super fan of the show. There you go. All right,
Speaker 1: those are some of them. This yeah, I think we's
Speaker 1: said we were two oh two. You said we're two
Speaker 1: oh nine. So if we get seven a week and
Speaker 1: we beg every week for customer reviews, we will eventually
Speaker 1: get to like a thousand by the time we're eighty, right.
Speaker 1: Does that Does that mean we can monetize after that? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, exactly,
Speaker 1: keep it, keep you on. This is how funked up
Speaker 1: the podcast world is, Like, I'll let you in behind
Speaker 1: the curtain a little bit, Like that's one of the
Speaker 1: things they look at. They look at customer reviews. It's
Speaker 1: like one of the criteria on how to make money.
Speaker 1: We're not making any money on this, but how to
Speaker 1: make money on a podcast. The people that I heart
Speaker 1: are like, well, what are the views and what do
Speaker 1: people saying and uh and those kind of things. So
Speaker 1: it's it's it's interesting, I said, I interested in how
Speaker 1: they you know, they make the hot dogs and all that.
Speaker 1: It's it's an interesting thing. So coming up on today's podcast,
Speaker 1: we have study and survey this tribute to Penn and
Speaker 1: Teller real bullshit. We've got pop quiz and I think
Speaker 1: that's it. I think we have enough with that for
Speaker 1: this podcast. I think that will provide us enough compelling
Speaker 1: content for this podcast. Is that correct? I think we're right? Yeah, alright,
Speaker 1: So it's a it's a Saturday, here we go. Let's
Speaker 1: get to study this. These your actual studies by actual
Speaker 1: universities and people in the scientifical world, these typical world.
Speaker 1: All right, so let's see what do we have here.
Speaker 1: We'll start out with this word a new discovery, new
Speaker 1: discovery gascon This is very exciting of the skinny gene.
Speaker 1: That what the hell skinny? Uh? The so called skinny
Speaker 1: gene researchers have an answers do I So many people
Speaker 1: con seemingly eat whatever the funk they want at the
Speaker 1: buffet and not they don't get any weight. They don't
Speaker 1: get any weight. Um, go out, eat ice cream at
Speaker 1: two in the morning, eat a pound of candy bars,
Speaker 1: a whole box of Hershey bars. You're you're not getting
Speaker 1: any weight. Well, they figured out why scientists scientists from Austria,
Speaker 1: Canada and Estonia, all working together, say that lower or
Speaker 1: deficient levels of the gene an a plastic limbhoma Canassi.
Speaker 1: I like how I said that with a question mark
Speaker 1: a LK are significantly linked to skinniness and bodily resistance
Speaker 1: to weight gain. Most research projects focusing on weight loss
Speaker 1: and gain. Search of genes has caused that they try
Speaker 1: to figure out what causes the bacity. The study is
Speaker 1: novel though, due the fact that it focuses specifically on
Speaker 1: a gene that is related to thinness. Now you talk
Speaker 1: about genetic modification of you know, designer babies, would you
Speaker 1: put that in like would you want to have I
Speaker 1: would love to have had that life and have a
Speaker 1: big hearty appetite and not gain any weight and not
Speaker 1: have to worry about that. Part of me says yes,
Speaker 1: but the other part says no, because like what if
Speaker 1: what if you have a young boy and you want
Speaker 1: him to grow up and be like a football player.
Speaker 1: You know you're a big guy, so what why don't
Speaker 1: you want to have Why don't you want him to
Speaker 1: have your genes and possibly be like a left tackle
Speaker 1: or a right tackle and b six ft four, and
Speaker 1: I don't like the old kids. As long as they're healthy.
Speaker 1: You know, you want him healthy and able to live,
Speaker 1: to live a good life, right. Like, I got a
Speaker 1: buddy of mine who's like, I'm sure my kid if
Speaker 1: I you know, if I had a kid, it would
Speaker 1: not be an athletic chip. I got a buddy of
Speaker 1: mine who who I grew up with. He's six ft
Speaker 1: six and he he always said from the day that
Speaker 1: we met, he's looking for D one. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: what the funk is D one? He says, I'm looking
Speaker 1: for a D one. I'm like, what is a D one?
Speaker 1: He's like, I need to find a woman who's like that.
Speaker 1: Like that's like the var Ball did that, didn't leave
Speaker 1: Ball do that? Yeah, Like he was looking for a
Speaker 1: woman that had like great genetics, good height, good skin,
Speaker 1: like whatever it may be, it didn't matter if she
Speaker 1: was like nice, just as long as she had the
Speaker 1: other elements, so he could possibly have a kid that
Speaker 1: would be a D one athlete. One day and sure ship,
Speaker 1: that motherfucker had two kids. One of them came out
Speaker 1: a monster. It was like ten ounds three ounces, and
Speaker 1: that thee was just underneath that but these kids who
Speaker 1: are like huge, like baby man child's and they're well
Speaker 1: on their way. They're gonna be just like his dad.
Speaker 1: So if I had a kid, I could see my
Speaker 1: kid growing up to be like a Paul mckennski type
Speaker 1: center in the NBA old school. NBA said, look him up. Yeah,
Speaker 1: better that or Bryan Reeves Big Country, Big Country. H
Speaker 1: Mckski actually had a career with Big Country ex flamed out. No, No,
Speaker 1: Big Country, Big Country was Bakensky was ugly looking, pasty
Speaker 1: white guy with bad hair who I remember watching. I
Speaker 1: went to a Bucks game against the Clippers and mckski
Speaker 1: was playing for the Bucks and I was like, what
Speaker 1: the fund is that guy's an NBA player. Jesus christ Um. Anyway,
Speaker 1: uh so this is some people are saying this is
Speaker 1: junk science, this report about the skinny jean, But it
Speaker 1: compared forty seven thousand people, and uh it's it's that
Speaker 1: does not seem like a statistical fluke. That is a
Speaker 1: large sample size. Yeah so anyway, that's who knows what.
Speaker 1: All the fat people have the same thought. Boy, I'd
Speaker 1: love to have that life. See I'm I'm I'm a
Speaker 1: bigger guyle is like actually thinking you were saying skinny
Speaker 1: jeans like material like the people were like, yeah, fat
Speaker 1: people should not wear skinny jeans. I don't thin skinny
Speaker 1: people should wear skinny jeans. But that's just how I
Speaker 1: that's how I operate my life. Yes, I'm fully to
Speaker 1: agree with Yes, alright, moving on on study this, how
Speaker 1: did law become part of human civilization? There's a new
Speaker 1: study out that shows about that. Uh talks about that,
Speaker 1: and the researchers have posted online that they go back
Speaker 1: to ancient societies and they believe a study of research
Speaker 1: at the University of Central Florida and University of Montreal
Speaker 1: found that several ancient societies had remarkably similar legal codes
Speaker 1: despite being thousands of miles and years apart, indicating they
Speaker 1: believe that law and order made be an instinct of sorts,
Speaker 1: of all sorts of human beings. Well, you wouldn't know
Speaker 1: it this week, guess. But Uh, that is interesting that
Speaker 1: back before global travel and and plus there's is different
Speaker 1: time periods and whatnot. Um, that is it's a fascinating dynamic. Now,
Speaker 1: is it possible? I guess it's not really possibly. They
Speaker 1: looked at let's see, they looked at laws that are
Speaker 1: over three thousand, eight hundred years old and laws that
Speaker 1: are fourteen hundred years old Chinese laws, and then they
Speaker 1: looked at the criminal Code of Pennsylvania and they were similar.
Speaker 1: So I wonder if we could bring anything back from
Speaker 1: back in the day, Like I wouldn't want to recommend
Speaker 1: public stoning, but uh, I would love to what would
Speaker 1: you like guess and what kind of corporal punishment would
Speaker 1: you like to know? To open up Quantanamo Bay again?
Speaker 1: That was a few years Nothing wrong with that, um,
Speaker 1: but you know, we we publicly shame people on Twitter
Speaker 1: and nowadays, what's wrong with having these people shamed up
Speaker 1: and down the street. Be sure to catch live editions
Speaker 1: of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern
Speaker 1: eleven pm Pacific on Fox Sports Radio and the I
Speaker 1: Heart Radio app. Well, it's the mob, the angry mob.
Speaker 1: You see the way this works. And I don't know
Speaker 1: who has the bugle, but somebody has the bugle and
Speaker 1: they blow into the bugle and the cavalry comes into attack,
Speaker 1: and that's very effective. The attack poodles. The poodles come
Speaker 1: in and start attacking you bots bringing the box. Well,
Speaker 1: typically when you have those accounts set up. There's always
Speaker 1: the notifications that set off somebody right away so that
Speaker 1: they immediately respond, like in the in the blink of
Speaker 1: an eye, it doesn't matter who it is. Like you
Speaker 1: get listeners that respond as soon as you tweet something
Speaker 1: out within seconds. I got the notifications set so ben
Speaker 1: tweets boom instant response like they do it across the board,
Speaker 1: doesn't matter the celebrity. Alright. Another study out of Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania,
Speaker 1: here we go. Scientists have been able to grow many
Speaker 1: human liver from stem cells and successfully transplant them into
Speaker 1: rest And this is great news. Um, some of you know,
Speaker 1: my mom died years ago from cancer. She had breast cancer.
Speaker 1: But she beat that a couple of she had to.
Speaker 1: She actually had cancer three times. She had beaten. The
Speaker 1: fourth time knocked her out. But um, she she had
Speaker 1: breast cancer and then she was like almost five years.
Speaker 1: You know the cancer game. If you make it five years,
Speaker 1: you're you're in really you're in good shape. They consider
Speaker 1: you mostly cancer free at that point. Right, she was
Speaker 1: like a four years and like ten months and the
Speaker 1: cancer came back, but it spread to her liver. And
Speaker 1: you're really fucked when you get liver cancer, right, and
Speaker 1: you're just and so if they're able to figure out
Speaker 1: how to a grow livers some way and and then
Speaker 1: successfully get that into the human body, my god, would
Speaker 1: that be awesome? That would be an amazing thing. Be awesome.
Speaker 1: This kind of goes back to our conversation last week
Speaker 1: about Elon Musk and neuralink, like having a ship placed
Speaker 1: in your mind if it can help cure Alzheimer's or dementia. Sure, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's again. It's it's one of those things where you
Speaker 1: don't really give a funk about liver transplants unless you
Speaker 1: have liver carer. All of a sudden this becomes a
Speaker 1: very important issue, you know. It's like, suddenly this becomes
Speaker 1: the other one. Oh, our boss Andrew Ashwood who died
Speaker 1: of pancreatic cancer, he had that for for a while,
Speaker 1: our old boss of Fox. Um, if they could that's
Speaker 1: a really tough one, the pancreatic cancer. That's there's really
Speaker 1: just nothing they can do depend if they don't get
Speaker 1: it early, and they don't usually get it early. So
Speaker 1: they got to figure out something with that. That's also
Speaker 1: on the on the list, all right. This kind of
Speaker 1: relates to pop quiz, but it's not a blank device.
Speaker 1: Um may soon be commonplace in America that it involves
Speaker 1: the coronavirus pandemic, but it might become a regular device
Speaker 1: that we all have day to day life in America. Thermometer, no,
Speaker 1: a handheld uval fight that kills COVID nineteen. About that phone, keys, wallet,
Speaker 1: all of that. Bringing the ultra violet device just in
Speaker 1: case you want to have another thing to put in
Speaker 1: your in your pocket and all that. But new researchers
Speaker 1: say that portable handheld ultra violet light devices capable of
Speaker 1: killing the COVID nineteen coronavirus from muhan Hina maybe a
Speaker 1: reality in the future. These gadgets may as a weasel work,
Speaker 1: but these gadgets would emit high intensity ultra violet light
Speaker 1: and quickly disinfect targeted areas. So here's what you gotta do, Guest.
Speaker 1: First of all, you got to investigate this. Secondly, you've
Speaker 1: got to find out which companies are gonna make this
Speaker 1: and invest in these things, because the people that are germophobes,
Speaker 1: even when this is over, the people that germophobes are
Speaker 1: still gonna buy this. The hypochondria acts are gonna buy this.
Speaker 1: This is gonna be a big market. There's a lot
Speaker 1: of market for the device that that they can market
Speaker 1: it will kill the coronavirus, of course they they the
Speaker 1: way they would market the final thing here, the way
Speaker 1: they would market it is nine chance it will kill
Speaker 1: the coronavirus, right, because I can't say because in case
Speaker 1: it doesn't actually work, right of course. And it's it's
Speaker 1: funny you said that, Like we talked about this on
Speaker 1: a previous episode, like investment wise, besides the airline industry,
Speaker 1: is it's exactly what I've been looking at tech and pharmaceuticals. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean it's it's really scatter shot though the farm
Speaker 1: the pharmaceutical companies because they've all got stuff in development,
Speaker 1: most of them. But what actually, who's the one you got?
Speaker 1: Can you bet on the one that will find the
Speaker 1: cure for cancer that will then become Amazon? You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying? Can you figure that one out? That's
Speaker 1: always the problem or Amazon actually buys them out right? Exactly?
Speaker 1: There you go? All right? More studies here eight seven
Speaker 1: eight seven percent of people say that they've had usual
Speaker 1: dreams since the apocalypse started. That includes twenty who have
Speaker 1: had an unexpected dream about their ex but that you know,
Speaker 1: the old flame popping up back in your head while
Speaker 1: you're sleeping. Now, I've always been of the belief guest
Speaker 1: gut and my wife agrees with this that whatever you
Speaker 1: were doing in the hours a couple of hours before
Speaker 1: you went to sleep, you're watching TV or listen to
Speaker 1: a radio show. I get emails from people about this.
Speaker 1: But whatever you're doing, uh, you will have some dream
Speaker 1: will be loosely related to that. If you are a dreamer,
Speaker 1: I'm not. I usually don't sleep deep enough unless I
Speaker 1: get drugged with my Kirkland brand sleep aid um to dream.
Speaker 1: When I take the Kirkland Brand sleep Aid, I do
Speaker 1: get into a deep enough state of sleep where I
Speaker 1: I'm able to dream. But it is true like if
Speaker 1: you if you're watching the rioting and the looting and
Speaker 1: the pillaging of cities on news on the news before
Speaker 1: you go to bed, chances are you gonna have some
Speaker 1: kind of dream related to fire or crime or something
Speaker 1: like that. Man, I tend to agree with you on that.
Speaker 1: On the other side, though, I've had some random dreams
Speaker 1: about x is or just women I've dated in the past. Now,
Speaker 1: are you making whoopie in this Were you going hubba
Speaker 1: hubba with the or you were just hanging out with
Speaker 1: him or whatever? Yeah, Like I had a dream about
Speaker 1: an X Like I remember this distinctly where it was
Speaker 1: during this like a pandemic chaos, and then all of
Speaker 1: a sudden, I went from one room to another room,
Speaker 1: almost like a slide show. I went from one room
Speaker 1: to the other, soone from chaos to a beach, and
Speaker 1: I remember she was just laying out sunbathing on a
Speaker 1: reclining chair and she says, fuck you found me, And
Speaker 1: then I woke up. I remember that ship like it
Speaker 1: was yesterday, and I was like, what, why the funk
Speaker 1: am I dreaming about you? And too, why the funk
Speaker 1: am I dreaming about you? They're like, and then just
Speaker 1: cussing me out in the dream. I just I don't
Speaker 1: know what it meant, but why she's an ex, I
Speaker 1: believe right, YEA, Generally we don't like to hang out
Speaker 1: with people that curse us out. That usually doesn't go
Speaker 1: well for the long term relationship, you know. Not that
Speaker 1: not that I'm a relationship expertly or like Dr Drew
Speaker 1: or anything like that. All my relationships had been long term.
Speaker 1: My shortest relationship was like three years. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: this is I never had long term relationship with really.
Speaker 1: Be sure to catch live editions of The Ben Maller
Speaker 1: Show week days at two am Eastern pm Pacific, oh
Speaker 1: before my wife. Yeah, I I never. I mean it
Speaker 1: was all like a few months at the most. It
Speaker 1: was terrible because well, I was so fat, women wouldn't
Speaker 1: getting near me. I was for many years, so that
Speaker 1: was my first problem. And maybe occasionally I would have
Speaker 1: a hook up here and there, but it was very rare.
Speaker 1: And then and then later on when I did go
Speaker 1: out and date, it was it was like, you're such
Speaker 1: a great guy, and I like you a lot, but
Speaker 1: you know, work every Friday and Saturday night and we
Speaker 1: can't go out and I like to get dressed up
Speaker 1: and go out in the weekend, so fuck you. It
Speaker 1: was that kind of thing. And so, you know, once
Speaker 1: you get in this business and you get those bad hours,
Speaker 1: you stop getting invited to parties, you stopped getting you know,
Speaker 1: that kind of thing. So and then, but yeah, I've
Speaker 1: never I've never really had long term relationships with anybody
Speaker 1: as far as women are continuing. Dudes, I've known, but
Speaker 1: that didn't sleep with. So I don't think it counts you.
Speaker 1: I can't prove it, but maybe al right, a thirst
Speaker 1: for knowledge, thirst for knowledge. New study were doing study,
Speaker 1: this survey, this tribute to Pennant Teller's bullshit, that old
Speaker 1: show back on showtime back in the day. All right,
Speaker 1: So Vanderbilt University New researchers study concludes that children prefer
Speaker 1: story books containing information explaining how and why the world
Speaker 1: works the way it does. The authors believe their work
Speaker 1: will help parents and teachers alike pick out reading materials
Speaker 1: that children will be more willing to embrace. Yeah, why
Speaker 1: do you think the news media's so powerful right now?
Speaker 1: It's because they've infiltrated social media and then they disperse
Speaker 1: that ship out to the young masses and they're just
Speaker 1: fucking sheep. Well, yeah, we we talked about this in
Speaker 1: the previous episode of the Fifth Hour podcast. I forget
Speaker 1: which one. I think it was here. I don't think
Speaker 1: it was on the radio. That and this was a
Speaker 1: study people learn from stories, Yes, that we are all
Speaker 1: wired to learn from stories. Like if you give someone
Speaker 1: just facts and not a story, they will not retain that,
Speaker 1: that will not resonate with people. Um, We're all wired.
Speaker 1: It's just genetics. We're all wired and the same way
Speaker 1: we want to hear the story, whatever that is. You
Speaker 1: learn religion from the stories of the Bible, right, That's
Speaker 1: how you learn religion from the stories in the Bible.
Speaker 1: You you learn any medium from from stories. But one
Speaker 1: of the reasons people like certain radio shows because they
Speaker 1: tell stories. That's it, you know, the little stories that
Speaker 1: people love. Here is that I standing exact because when
Speaker 1: I was a kid, my mom used to read to me,
Speaker 1: and I I freaking love and I thought that was
Speaker 1: the greatest thing in the world. You know, you lay
Speaker 1: in bed, your jabaz on, you got your your Superman,
Speaker 1: Teddy Bear or whatever, and you just your mom reading.
Speaker 1: It's awesome. Yeah so, And I think as you grow
Speaker 1: up you like people to be like it flashes back
Speaker 1: to your younger days. You're like, oh, somebody's reading him.
Speaker 1: It's like, um, I'm like a kid again. But you
Speaker 1: think about it, you could do it in a simplistic
Speaker 1: form like here in Los Angeles. The difference between Vince
Speaker 1: Skill and every other Dodgers broadcaster we've ever had is
Speaker 1: what like his ability to to tell a story and
Speaker 1: not just be a stat driven play by play broadcaster.
Speaker 1: Everybody else was like that. Vinn was not. And he
Speaker 1: was also intelligent. He was educated, and he had a
Speaker 1: great grasp of of not a U S history, but
Speaker 1: human history. And he made everything into a conversation or
Speaker 1: welcome me in, and it was relatable. Like that was
Speaker 1: the biggest thing. That's why we loved him so much.
Speaker 1: He was like a friend talking to you. Yeah. And um.
Speaker 1: One of the things I've tried to add to my
Speaker 1: rep ti here is I do try with these dopey
Speaker 1: monologues that I do every night, I do try to
Speaker 1: mix in like odd references because I like these odd
Speaker 1: factoids and stuff, and I like to like throw them
Speaker 1: in the middle of a boring monologue about the Portland
Speaker 1: Trailblazers something, you know. I just try to spice them
Speaker 1: up a little bit, Kay and pepper on top there. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it's a little annoying. And I don't even know if
Speaker 1: anybody likes them, because I I enjoy them. I because
Speaker 1: it's a way for me to justify looking up stupid
Speaker 1: facts about life. I well, certain times, like if you
Speaker 1: use a word, I get a little fucking annoyed. Not
Speaker 1: why why would you get annoyed. I love words. All
Speaker 1: I have is words I learned from Brian Wheeler, the
Speaker 1: old voice of the Trailblazers. You got announce you you
Speaker 1: gotta because for me, I didn't read a lot as
Speaker 1: a kid, and so it's annoying for me now because
Speaker 1: there are people like like like Bob Costas. People either
Speaker 1: love him or hate him, but I think he has
Speaker 1: a great grasp of the English language. And all our
Speaker 1: friends that are good with language, good with words, good
Speaker 1: with language and having a good range. And I'm not
Speaker 1: one of those guys. So like I words, you say,
Speaker 1: I'm like Google, look at uh you know. I I am,
Speaker 1: as you know, not the most book educated person in
Speaker 1: the world. I did not graduate from college. I went
Speaker 1: to Saddleback College and I barely made it out of
Speaker 1: high school. I was not a great student in high school.
Speaker 1: But I feel like I've gotten more of an I'm
Speaker 1: like self educated because of the Internet. Um, thank god
Speaker 1: for the Internet. And I love learning new words. And
Speaker 1: I'm always like if i i'll hear somebody, I'll be
Speaker 1: watching something on YouTube and I'll hear some word that
Speaker 1: I've never heard before, and I'll be like, what the
Speaker 1: fund is that I gotta use that word. I gotta
Speaker 1: add that to my lexicon. I gotta, I gotta write
Speaker 1: that down. And uh, I love I love fun words.
Speaker 1: See because really, the way I determined this years ago,
Speaker 1: roughly nine of the time I am saying the same ship.
Speaker 1: Colin Cowherd is the same ship, Jason Smith, Clay Travis,
Speaker 1: Rob Parker, We're all saying the same ship through the
Speaker 1: course of the day. So you gotta stand out a little.
Speaker 1: You gotta find a way to make it sound different,
Speaker 1: using the same getting to the same point, but through
Speaker 1: different means, like you know, saying skullduggery or horn swoggle
Speaker 1: as opposed to some generic words that you could also
Speaker 1: say that would mean the same thing. Right, you said
Speaker 1: that person there was a scam involved. No, that person
Speaker 1: got horn swoggled. That's a much That's a much more
Speaker 1: enjoyable word to say, right, I think for me, maybe
Speaker 1: people don't agree with that, but I think those are
Speaker 1: more fun. Farcical. Scrupulous, Yes, a scrupulous is another one
Speaker 1: that's pretty good. Do you ever use zeitgeist? I have
Speaker 1: not really used zeitgeist regularly. I don't know that I've
Speaker 1: ever used it. I try to work in as a
Speaker 1: tribute to my my grandfather. When I was a kid
Speaker 1: and when we would be hanging out my mom's dad,
Speaker 1: he too, he wanted to curse. He would curse in
Speaker 1: Yiddish at the table. So I learned a lot of
Speaker 1: the bad words, but I, you know, like one of
Speaker 1: them I used because he would he would yell at
Speaker 1: these kids because we would take a long time to
Speaker 1: get ready to go to like he liked to go
Speaker 1: to Burger King and Pizza Hut when we were you kidding,
Speaker 1: but he would say stop crutching. Ois is what he
Speaker 1: would say, which is uh, which is Yiddish for you know,
Speaker 1: going very slow and uh. You know, you'd call you
Speaker 1: a schmendrick, which is a you know, fool or you
Speaker 1: know all that's so I try to work those in.
Speaker 1: But and then I'm also I didn't really know a
Speaker 1: lot of Latin. But then there's like I didn't realize
Speaker 1: there's so much Latin that is just in day to
Speaker 1: day life, like certain terms. Impromptu is a Latin word
Speaker 1: intro a Latin word quid pro quo, which is a
Speaker 1: fun phrase to say. Mia Colpa will use that in
Speaker 1: the previous podcast pro bono. The vice versa is Latin.
Speaker 1: Ad hawk is also Latin. Alibi. Alibi is probably the
Speaker 1: most is that the most used Latin word? Alibi? That
Speaker 1: person has an alibi? Yeah, it could be bona fide. Yeah,
Speaker 1: there's a good what's that anti stent? Is that Latin?
Speaker 1: But we have yeah, I mean you you mentioned it.
Speaker 1: It all goes back to, you know, the Latin origins
Speaker 1: and a prefix for something, suffix for another. Like there's yeah,
Speaker 1: pretty much all of our language, the the American dialect
Speaker 1: is just stealing ship from other people and turning into
Speaker 1: our own. And that's pretty much how we do it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I appreciate it's a it's a what's the phrase here?
Speaker 1: It's a it's a tapestry or now, what's the word
Speaker 1: I'm looking for here? Mosaic? Maybe that's not the right word.
Speaker 1: About fruit salad? How about salad? Fruits? But everything's intertwined, right,
Speaker 1: It's like a a canvas. Everything's crisscrossed together, and we've
Speaker 1: incorporated these other things. It's like California and New York.
Speaker 1: We are fucking melting pots, right, We're just this giant
Speaker 1: mixture of people, the good, the bad, and the ugly. Guy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I mean different cultures, different brands, different ideas, like we're
Speaker 1: just this giant melting pot. Be sure to catch live edition.
Speaker 1: So the Ben Maller Show weekdays at two am Eastern
Speaker 1: eleven pm Pacific. Yep, we are one more study here
Speaker 1: and then we'll get to pop quiz. My favorite part
Speaker 1: is pop quizz. I love the pop quizz. I love
Speaker 1: quizzing guest on quizzing you all right, So I knew
Speaker 1: study from researchers at Harvard University Harvard. Yard's been Harvard
Speaker 1: several times. You've been Harvard, You've been Harvard. I've walked
Speaker 1: by it. Yes. When I went to school at Northeastern,
Speaker 1: I I did the whole tour. I went Harvard. I
Speaker 1: went Northeastern obviously than Boston College and be you. I
Speaker 1: I mean, I fucking love Boston as it is, but
Speaker 1: to watch, I mean, you've got finily there obviously we're
Speaker 1: Boston or baseball guys. And then the TV Garden it's
Speaker 1: your Boston. Well, I'm right there, man. I love the vibe.
Speaker 1: It's such a sports crazy town too, and it's just
Speaker 1: like the whole I'm all about that action in Boston
Speaker 1: for sure. I've been. I've been lucky to do some
Speaker 1: stuff there on the radio locally a couple of years back.
Speaker 1: All Right, So, a new study from researchers at Harvard
Speaker 1: University says that hooking up carries some risk. You might
Speaker 1: see this seeing this the other day. Guess we haven't
Speaker 1: talked about it, Uh, the risk of transmitting the coronavirus
Speaker 1: from one part in to the other. And the researchers
Speaker 1: at Harvard recommend, apparently with a straight face, that, among
Speaker 1: other practices, couples should be wearing a mask while stooping.
Speaker 1: I saw that. How is that supposed to work? And
Speaker 1: I've seen I guess there's some cottage porn out there
Speaker 1: that people are wearing masks, But how how is this
Speaker 1: actually supposed to work? Guess got in the real world, like, uh,
Speaker 1: you know you you make the signs, your your head
Speaker 1: over heels and love, you're gonna you're gonna go do
Speaker 1: the dirty and then hold on, let me make sure
Speaker 1: my mask is on. You know, I gotta well, people
Speaker 1: wear masks like the S and M stuff, right, Like, yeah,
Speaker 1: you do that all the time. I know, if you
Speaker 1: know something different, different way to get off. But that
Speaker 1: tantalizing kind of in. This is perfect for role play though, right,
Speaker 1: you got a husband, I have boyfriend, girl friend, once
Speaker 1: a doctor, once a nurse. There you go, put again
Speaker 1: Cassanova with a mask. There you go. You can buy
Speaker 1: some scrubs that have the COVID nineteen masks and then
Speaker 1: that's how you're undressing it. After it boom, you're on
Speaker 1: your way. All right, time it out for pop quiz.
Speaker 1: These are actual quiz questions that we discovered this week
Speaker 1: and we compiled and here they are. All right, forty
Speaker 1: percent of people admit they have secretly done this at
Speaker 1: work when no one was looking. What is it? Look
Speaker 1: up porn? I'll bet you it's more that looked up
Speaker 1: porn at work. The answer is adjust the thermostat Oh,
Speaker 1: I think that'd be higher than that. I agree. We
Speaker 1: admitted to it, so you know that's more. And I
Speaker 1: used to do this all the time. I believed in
Speaker 1: the old David Letterman philosophy of broadcasting. I wanted to
Speaker 1: be living in an ice box when I was doing radio.
Speaker 1: And a couple of years ago there was is one
Speaker 1: of our our talk shows. I remember exactly when it happened.
Speaker 1: We had a guy that used to play college basketball
Speaker 1: at Penn State and played with the Lakers. I forget
Speaker 1: the guy's name, but he was a little late getting
Speaker 1: out of the studio and I was the next show
Speaker 1: coming in, and there was a collision and the box
Speaker 1: in the main studio that controls the temperature the thermostat
Speaker 1: came tumbling down. It fell off the wall, and they
Speaker 1: replaced it with a thermostat that you cannot adjust. And
Speaker 1: I'm still fucking pissed about that because I I no
Speaker 1: longer when I go into the studio, I'm able to
Speaker 1: turn the temperature down, and it still bothers me. I
Speaker 1: used to love going in there and turning it down.
Speaker 1: I was like my way of getting a couple of
Speaker 1: extra bucks out of the company the electric bill. Would
Speaker 1: you ever set the microphone volume up sky high so
Speaker 1: when the other person came in and they're just blaster
Speaker 1: ear drums? Well, I didn't have to do that because
Speaker 1: I just left mine. Mine is turned all the way
Speaker 1: up there, So why that would just be the way
Speaker 1: that would work? So hearing is not not not great
Speaker 1: over here. A new survey says ninety two percent of
Speaker 1: children eat this, but only nine percent of adults enjoy this,
Speaker 1: Um about this is it? Jillo? Do do do? Do? Do?
Speaker 1: This involves cold weather? How about that involves cold weather?
Speaker 1: Kids eat this? But only nine of adults. I was
Speaker 1: gonna say, if they eat it wouldn't be hot chocolate.
Speaker 1: Um cold weather? Um got nothing? No? All right, snow?
Speaker 1: Have you ever eaten snow? No? You have not? No,
Speaker 1: come on no. One of my favorite memories in life
Speaker 1: I was as in New York few years back. My
Speaker 1: my nieces bought mitzvah and it was snowing in Manhattan
Speaker 1: and got into a snowball fight in man That was awesome.
Speaker 1: Very few people out, piles of snow on the cars
Speaker 1: that were parked on the side streets, and the mail
Speaker 1: boxes and all this stuff, and we were just picking
Speaker 1: the snow up and just it was felt like I
Speaker 1: was in a movie. It was great. And I did
Speaker 1: eat some snow that day. I did. I ate snow,
Speaker 1: not the yellow snow. I eat just regular snow. Yeah,
Speaker 1: I did as a kid eats. Sorry, doc, I did
Speaker 1: not eat snow yellow snow. Snow cones were always good, though,
Speaker 1: like when they put the syrup in there, like oh yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: those are pretty tasty. Book on snow cones like yellow snow. Yeah,
Speaker 1: next time Doc calls up, I'm gonna have to bring
Speaker 1: up the fact. Hey, Doc, you know you should the
Speaker 1: way to get people to drink urine is you should
Speaker 1: get you should sell it as like the ice, the ice,
Speaker 1: what do they call those things? The It would be
Speaker 1: like a fucking mohito man, like you what youre this?
Speaker 1: I don't know? You can hit That's the book of
Speaker 1: urine right there. It sounds like a zipper. It's a
Speaker 1: book that Doc sent me. There yourself and to health
Speaker 1: or whatever was that. I saw your picture of it
Speaker 1: on social media. I can't I can't believe he sent
Speaker 1: that to you. I can't think that's even true. But
Speaker 1: you want to there's a bunch of other stuff I
Speaker 1: didn't tweet out. Let's see you here. I mean, the
Speaker 1: fact that Fats let himself on fire after drinking his
Speaker 1: own piss is pretty phenomenal. But then you have Doc
Speaker 1: Mike send you a book. Yeah, he sent me a
Speaker 1: bunch of other pamphlets of weird ship. Then oh, here's
Speaker 1: here's here he sent me. This is great. Doc sent
Speaker 1: me a copy of him being Remember he got it.
Speaker 1: He went to jail for a while because he caught
Speaker 1: practicing medicine. He sent me the conditions of his probation
Speaker 1: release when he got out of jail, and it's got
Speaker 1: third he sent me a copy. This is unbelievable. He
Speaker 1: wrote two years at the top. This goes back to
Speaker 1: August of August of so that's when he was banned
Speaker 1: from calling the show. And it's got a list of
Speaker 1: things he cannot do on probation and number six on
Speaker 1: the list the defendant shell and no way associate in
Speaker 1: any business internet site, radio, or media outlet, publication, or
Speaker 1: any other vehicle which holds out to the public any
Speaker 1: service which is related any way to health or medical
Speaker 1: advice or treatment. And Uh. Of course he got in
Speaker 1: trouble partly from our show and others because he was
Speaker 1: calling up and claiming he was a doctor and UH
Speaker 1: didn't go to medical schools. Fox Sports Radio has the
Speaker 1: best sports talk lineup in the nation. Catch all of
Speaker 1: our shows at Fox Sports Radio dot com and within
Speaker 1: the I Heart Radio app search f s R to
Speaker 1: listen live. Al Right, pop quiz continues twenty of adults
Speaker 1: admitting they cannot do this simple task. What is it? Guess? Uh? No, no,
Speaker 1: it is name all of the planets in our Solar system.
Speaker 1: We contain the name planets too, which is nice. Did
Speaker 1: you watch SpaceX last week when they launched. I slip
Speaker 1: right through that. I did. I sleep on on the weekends,
Speaker 1: but I did. I did watch some videos on YouTube
Speaker 1: after the fact. And I have signed up, as I
Speaker 1: said a while back, because of my pops. You can
Speaker 1: sign up on a website and they will send you
Speaker 1: a text message when the International Space Station is flying
Speaker 1: over your part of the world. And it's pretty cool. Now,
Speaker 1: sometimes it's only flying over for one minute. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: tell you right now. Life tip. Okay, if you sign
Speaker 1: up for this thing, to go out and look at
Speaker 1: the International Space Station. If it's only flying over for
Speaker 1: one minute, don't waste your time. Sometimes it flies over
Speaker 1: for like five, six, seven minutes. Because I've determined it
Speaker 1: takes about three minutes to figure out where of the
Speaker 1: funk the thing is in the sky, so right or there,
Speaker 1: you you gotta eliminate three minutes. So anything above like
Speaker 1: five minutes, you're good because at least you get a
Speaker 1: couple of good minutes. Check them out. But I love that,
Speaker 1: And can you name all the planets in the Solar System.
Speaker 1: Guess can you? Yeah, do you have enough time? Um?
Speaker 1: Hold on? But I think the really hold on. I
Speaker 1: think the way real quick. The real advantage too, is
Speaker 1: if you're like in the desert like Arizona, or even
Speaker 1: like Palm Desert, but like Arizona, like Phoenix or whatever,
Speaker 1: and it's at nighttime, then you really got a great
Speaker 1: chance of seeing the if if it's as powerful as
Speaker 1: as it is, because they have they have some lights
Speaker 1: on there that looked pretty much like a moving star.
Speaker 1: Correct with that the International Space Station? Yeah, I mean, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's pretty cool. And I you know, I was in
Speaker 1: Orange County the last time I saw it, which is
Speaker 1: a very red you know, big lights, you know, light
Speaker 1: poison and all that. I saw it perfectly. I mean
Speaker 1: it was I make it out. I didn't have you know,
Speaker 1: I used we did have binoculars, but it wasn't like
Speaker 1: they weren't like the expensive Benois. What time of day
Speaker 1: was it? Was it like middle of the day or
Speaker 1: afternoon or nighttime or something? Well, no, it flies over
Speaker 1: either in the morning, usually at night. This was it
Speaker 1: like eight eight o'clock at night, So it was eight
Speaker 1: or eight eight thirty something like that. A new services
Speaker 1: of parents have tried to bribe their child to get
Speaker 1: them to stop doing this. What is it? Mm hmmm
Speaker 1: uh picking their nose? Um, No, throwing a tantrum, having
Speaker 1: a hissy fit, having a conniption fit. Right. I used
Speaker 1: to have a bad habit as a kid throwing rocks.
Speaker 1: Oh really, you're a hoodlum. Yeah. I used to throw
Speaker 1: rocks all the time. My backyard was just filled with
Speaker 1: rocks before you put grass in it. Were you breaking windows?
Speaker 1: And I used to I was an asshole I had
Speaker 1: I had a pretty good arms. I knew that I
Speaker 1: had a pretty good arms that it. So instead of
Speaker 1: throwing rocks at things, I would throw rocks sky high
Speaker 1: into the air into other backyards and uh yeah, the
Speaker 1: harder they come down on somebody. Man, it's just I
Speaker 1: go running and hiding. But I used to get my
Speaker 1: ass beat and well deserved us. My ass kicked for
Speaker 1: throwing rocks. Did you did your old man ever beat
Speaker 1: you up for your parking skills when he was teaching
Speaker 1: how to park? No? No, but see he did confess
Speaker 1: to me. Um at one time, he says, you gotta
Speaker 1: you drive like I used to drive. You know. Oh,
Speaker 1: it's genetic. It's genetic, which is funny because I don't
Speaker 1: even remember how he used to drive. Remember how my
Speaker 1: mom used to drive, but not him. So it's kind
Speaker 1: of weird, but alright, pop quiz here we go continues.
Speaker 1: In Sweden, they like to put pineapple and peanuts on
Speaker 1: this classic food dish. Pizza is correct? Pineapple and peanuts
Speaker 1: is a Swedish Oh no, no, actually no, and pizza.
Speaker 1: Excuse me? I thought I thought that would be pizza.
Speaker 1: I screwed up. Tacos. Oh man, tacos. They put pineapple
Speaker 1: and peanuts on tacos. Have you ever had Have you
Speaker 1: had tacos with mango? I'm not No, it's pretty good?
Speaker 1: Is it good? Yeah? I love tacos, can't go wrong
Speaker 1: with them. I like the green goat tacos though. I
Speaker 1: like the crunchy tacos. I like them. Told by my
Speaker 1: friends who are authentic that that's not the real taco.
Speaker 1: I like street tacos. Yeah, well, I like street pretzels,
Speaker 1: That's what I like. A new survey found that seven
Speaker 1: out of ten Americans are worried that they'll never be
Speaker 1: financially independent. Guess gun how about that seven out of ten,
Speaker 1: I believe it. Yeah, that's especially now with what's been
Speaker 1: going on this year. As far as the finances are concerned,
Speaker 1: new report claims most of us will lose at least
Speaker 1: three of these this year. What are they? Friends? Uh? No, forks?
Speaker 1: All right, forks. That's pretty fucking random. In World War One,
Speaker 1: this was known as the liberty sandwich. A ham sandwich.
Speaker 1: Now close a hamburger, all right, So in World War One,
Speaker 1: I'd like a liberty sandwich? Is that? So? You can?
Speaker 1: You have a liberty sandwich with French fries? Though? Question?
Speaker 1: Another freedom fries? Though? Are the freedom fries? Yeah? That's good.
Speaker 1: Liberty sandwich and freedom fries to go. That's pretty down
Speaker 1: good alright, last one on pop quiz and getting at
Speaker 1: along here. The longest anyone's been able to do this
Speaker 1: on a motorcycle was just over a hundred and twenty
Speaker 1: five miles. Uh drive on one wheel? No? Um? Drive backwards?
Speaker 1: How the funk would you drive a motorcycle backwards for
Speaker 1: a hundred twenty five miles? More importantly, why the funk
Speaker 1: would you drive a motorcycle backwards? No? Ship? And like,
Speaker 1: how are you actually maneuvering that way backwards for Miles.
Speaker 1: I don't know, I didn't do it, but that's pretty wild,
Speaker 1: pretty wild. All right, that'll that'll be that. Thank you again.
Speaker 1: Remember every day, tell a friend, spread the word. Word
Speaker 1: of mouth advertising the most effective advertising. Follow us on
Speaker 1: social media Twitter at Ben Mallard, Instagram, Ben Maller on
Speaker 1: Fox Facebook, Ben Mallard Show, and cameo. Just look my
Speaker 1: name him and if you don't c a m eo
Speaker 1: dot com cameo. I am on there and I'm much cheaper,
Speaker 1: by the way than my colleagues Clay Travis and Rob Parker.
Speaker 1: I am. I'm giving you a deal. I am giving
Speaker 1: the mallamlisha a deal on there for the video shout out.
Speaker 1: How can people reach you? Gascon? Twitter at David Jay
Speaker 1: Gascon just the letter J and then Instagram at Dave Gascon.
Speaker 1: All right, we'll have a mailbag. We'll open up the
Speaker 1: mail bag tomorrow, but have a great day. We'll catch
Speaker 1: you next time.