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Speaker 1: Second date update. He's got a guy on the phone

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Speaker 1: for a second date update today, and I really don't

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Speaker 1: know much about him, but from what I could tell

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Speaker 1: from reading his email, he's definitely a guy. Okay, that's good,

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Speaker 1: Jeffrey starting somewhere. He's male. That's the same thing. He

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Speaker 1: has a y chromosome somewhere in his DNA. Again, not

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Speaker 1: sure where you've learned one thing? In short, he's a dude, okay, Michael,

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Speaker 1: would you say my breakdown of you is accurate? That's

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Speaker 1: a pre accurate assessment. Sure, yeah, I don't know. I

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Speaker 1: heard his voice. I think it's questionable. I mean, I'm

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Speaker 1: pretty good at reading people. Got to say. There might

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Speaker 1: be an extra chromosome in there somewhere, but I don't know.

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Speaker 1: Oh man, can we get one more fun fact other

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Speaker 1: than you're a dude? Michael? My favorite color is red?

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Speaker 1: Oh wow? What more do we need to know about him?

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Speaker 1: I already knew that I could tell. So my masculine friend,

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Speaker 1: tell me about the lady that you want us to

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Speaker 1: call today. What's her name? So her name is Rebecca,

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Speaker 1: and I'm guessing, hold on, I'm just gonna guess that

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Speaker 1: she's a girl. You said, you have a gift. My man,

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Speaker 1: where did you meet Rebecca? So? I met Rebecca in

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Speaker 1: the elevator at my office building. That's a bold move.

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Speaker 1: Do you work there? Is that where you work? Okay?

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I'm just I can't stop it from coming in, dude.

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Speaker 1: I mean, that's a short elevator ride to meet somebody

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Speaker 1: and really connect with someone. How did that happen? Well,

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Speaker 1: it was a strange situation. She walked into the elevator.

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Speaker 1: I was in talking on her phone, and she was

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Speaker 1: telling her friend. She's like, I have to go. There's

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Speaker 1: a cute guy on in the elevator. Do a good move, Rebecca. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she was probably even faking that phone call like that.

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Speaker 1: That's a baller status move. That's really well. There's more

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Speaker 1: because before I could say anything to her, she turned

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Speaker 1: to me and she was like, sorry for lying, you know,

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Speaker 1: I just wanted to get off the phone with her.

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Speaker 1: Oh no her, Yeah, go on in one second. This

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Speaker 1: woman built you up and then broke you down. What'd

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Speaker 1: you say? It's telling a little bit. I was like out,

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Speaker 1: you know, and she apologized, She smiled and just kind

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Speaker 1: of like got off on the next floor. Wow, that's

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Speaker 1: quite a romantic encounter. Well there's more. Okay. So the

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Speaker 1: next morning, you know, I waited in the parking garage

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Speaker 1: until I saw a Parker car. Okay, I creeped a

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Speaker 1: little bit. I mean, what am I gonna say? I

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Speaker 1: pretend to be on the phone, you know, And I

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Speaker 1: got an elevator right after her. Then once I got on,

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Speaker 1: I said out loud, so I can't talk. There's a

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Speaker 1: girl in the elevator that has the hots for me,

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Speaker 1: but she's too embarrassed to ask me out that I

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Speaker 1: wants you, right, I actually down mad props on that one, smooth.

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Speaker 1: I thought it was creepy. You were waiting for her,

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Speaker 1: Now I get it, though, redeemed yourself like that, and

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Speaker 1: I assumed she loved it as much as we did. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she laughed, and she gave me her number right after,

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Speaker 1: and she told me to call her day. Dude, I'm

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Speaker 1: high five and you through the microphone right now. Job yea,

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Speaker 1: So how is the date? Where'd you guys go? So? Yeah,

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Speaker 1: we went to a Mexican restaurant for dinner, and we

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Speaker 1: agreed to check out some of their sausas. So she

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Speaker 1: tasted a little bit and said it was kind of hot,

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Speaker 1: you know, thinking I was being macho, I like put

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Speaker 1: a ton on my food, and it was a lot

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Speaker 1: worse than I thought it would be. I couldn't handle

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Speaker 1: the spice. Yeah, I could not handle the spice. I

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Speaker 1: started swiping through my clothes. My eyes were cheering up.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, you just powered through your meal even

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Speaker 1: though you couldn't eat it. I was trying, but I

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Speaker 1: was also crying at the same time. And she even

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Speaker 1: asked me, like, are you crying, you know, and I said, no,

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Speaker 1: it's just the sausa making tears come on my eyes.

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Speaker 1: Oh god, So you're bawling in the middle of a

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Speaker 1: Mexican restaurant wall on a date. It was not a

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Speaker 1: good look. And when your mouth is on fire like

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Speaker 1: that and your innerds are burning, it's really hard to

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Speaker 1: concentrate on anything else. Like probably really embarrassing for her

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Speaker 1: to have to sit across from that. I mean, were

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Speaker 1: you able to have a conversation. Not really. I mean

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Speaker 1: it was bad. People were looking at us, and I

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Speaker 1: mean they thought I was a crazy person, or like

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Speaker 1: I don't. I mean they were I think people thought

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Speaker 1: that like we were breaking up or something like I

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Speaker 1: was being broken up with and I was crying. I

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Speaker 1: don't know what he's sweating. It's a great image, though,

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, but I love to sit next to

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Speaker 1: couples like that because it makes your dinner so much

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Speaker 1: more fun to like eavesdrop and try to figure out

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Speaker 1: what's really going on. Were you able to save this, Oh,

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Speaker 1: I wouldn't. I wouldn't say that. No, what happened. She

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Speaker 1: eventually just said, you know, I'm sorry, but I'm running

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Speaker 1: Leanta have to get home. And she helped me order

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Speaker 1: an uber and uh, you know, because I couldn't see

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Speaker 1: a straight and she said, I hope you feel better,

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Speaker 1: and I almost crap my pants in the uber. Almost

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Speaker 1: is a keyword there, though. Good on you man, Good

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Speaker 1: on you. Yeah. Funny side to everything, I guess. Yeah.

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Speaker 1: So have you tried to call and apologize and explain

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Speaker 1: it all? Yeah? I mean I've reached out and haven't

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Speaker 1: heard anything. Yeah. And I you know, I don't want

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Speaker 1: to wait for in the parking garage again. I'd be

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Speaker 1: probably creepy, you know what. I appreciate that you realize that,

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Speaker 1: and you'd be surprised to know how many people don't. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: every day just waiting I think that's a quitter's attitude,

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Speaker 1: and you should try. I'm at a loss here. I

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Speaker 1: really screwed up, and yeah, I'm hoping you can dig

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Speaker 1: me out of this hole. I think we can. I

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Speaker 1: think that you can recover from this. We can come

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Speaker 1: back from bad salsa. We can do this. All we

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Speaker 1: have to do is play a song. We'll come back,

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Speaker 1: and then we'll call her for you and try and

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Speaker 1: get in a second date. All right, all right, I'm psyched.

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Speaker 1: All right, hold on, we're in the middle of a

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Speaker 1: second date update with our suave new friend Michael. Oh yeah, Michael,

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Speaker 1: he may have delivered the smoothest line we've ever heard

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Speaker 1: on our show. I agree with that. I mean smoother

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Speaker 1: than a gallon of buttermilk going through a hound dog.

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Speaker 1: Just silky smooth. What is that acknowledge? It has very chunky. Basically,

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Speaker 1: a girl dissed him on the elevator, so he waited

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Speaker 1: till the next day, pretended to be on the phone

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Speaker 1: and said, Hey, I need to hang up. There's a

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Speaker 1: girl here who has the hots for me, but she's

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Speaker 1: too afraid to ask me out. And it worked. Damn.

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Speaker 1: It's good, dude. So many people are copying that move. Oh, man,

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Speaker 1: I can't wait to see someone the elevator today. I

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Speaker 1: have a husband and I'm gonna do it. It was

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Speaker 1: so amazing. It got him a date with a girl

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Speaker 1: named Rebecca, and everything went downhill when they went to

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Speaker 1: a Mexican restaurant and Michael put too much spicy salsa

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Speaker 1: on his food. He said he grab the hottest one.

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Speaker 1: A challenge, Yeah, a little macho move, and it didn't

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Speaker 1: go well, so she ended up putting him in an

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Speaker 1: uber and sending him home. Now, to add insult to injury,

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Speaker 1: Rebecca's not calling him back either. So Michael, you're ready

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Speaker 1: to do this? I'm ready? Good Michael, what were you thinking?

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Speaker 1: No woman on the planet has ever said now, I

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Speaker 1: like him because he likes hot salsa. Like it's not

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Speaker 1: a thing for us. You know, the man brain does?

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Speaker 1: Man brain does? You are good with the one lines,

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Speaker 1: you know? So, how are you feeling? Are you excited?

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Speaker 1: I'm nervous, excited? Yeah, open, we'll go. Well, I'm very

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Speaker 1: hopeful on this one that makes one of us at least.

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Speaker 1: I'm just kidding Michael. I think we do have a

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Speaker 1: shot at getting another date with this one. Yes, all right,

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Speaker 1: just don't eat any salsa before we call her. Okay, well,

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Speaker 1: I'm swearing off salsa for the rest of my life.

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Speaker 1: All right, good man. So I'm gonna dial the phone

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Speaker 1: number right now and we're gonna try and get your

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Speaker 1: second date update. All right, all right, let's do it. Okay,

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Speaker 1: here we go. Hello, how can I speak to Rebecca? Please?

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Speaker 1: This is Rebecca? Who's calling? Hey? How are you? This

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Speaker 1: is young Jeffrey from the radio show Brooke and Jeffrey

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Speaker 1: in the Morning. Okay, Um, are you sure you got

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Speaker 1: the right Rebecca? I'm pretty sure. Hi, Rebecca, Oh it's

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Speaker 1: MANI okay, it's a whole radio show calling you. Okay, Um,

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Speaker 1: ask how you got my number? No, you may not. Yes,

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Speaker 1: question very rude and I don't appreciate that. Will answer

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Speaker 1: if you must know. We're calling on behalf of our

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Speaker 1: friend named Michael. Okay, okay, this is really weird. Do

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Speaker 1: you know a Michael. Could you think of a Michael

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Speaker 1: that we're talking about? Yeah, I mean I know a

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Speaker 1: couple of Michaels. I have a co worker named Michael. Um, okay,

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Speaker 1: well I don't. I don't know which Michael this is.

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Speaker 1: But you went on a date with this Michael recently

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Speaker 1: to a Mexican restaurant. Is that narrow it down? Yeah? Okay,

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Speaker 1: She's like, you know, actually, I went out with all

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Speaker 1: the last Michaels, all of them one week. So Michael

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Speaker 1: wants to know why you're not calling him back after

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Speaker 1: your date, because he says he had a good time,

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Speaker 1: even though he knows he may have messed things up

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Speaker 1: literally a little bit. Oh man, I'm sure he's nervous

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Speaker 1: about that. Oh, it was a funny date. I've never

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Speaker 1: had that situation on a date. And you're talking about

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Speaker 1: the situation as in the hot saltso that he ate

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Speaker 1: when he was sweating profusely and everyone was staring at

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Speaker 1: you guys and crying. Oh yeah, they're crying. I forgot.

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Speaker 1: Don't forget the tears. The tears are crucial. That poor man.

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Speaker 1: What were you thinking? Did you feel so bad for him? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: I mean it was pretty funny actually, but also kind

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Speaker 1: of a turn off. It sounds like, yeah, oh, I

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Speaker 1: mean the only turnoff really was I've had just as

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Speaker 1: much of the same sauce on my food and it

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Speaker 1: didn't affect me at all. Really, you know, those Michaels

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Speaker 1: they could be sensitive little flowers camping, but that's I mean,

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Speaker 1: that's not a reason not to go out with someone, right,

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Speaker 1: I mean, yeah, you're you're absolutely right. I was gonna

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Speaker 1: call him again. That was really my plan. So what

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Speaker 1: happened to that plan? Why aren't you calling him? This

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Speaker 1: is gonna sound weird? Um, Okay, something kind of I

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Speaker 1: don't want to say dramatic and be dramatic, but something

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Speaker 1: kind of happened that made me I'm just I don't

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Speaker 1: know if I can go out with him again. What

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Speaker 1: that sounds juicy? I'm sorry? But did we miss something?

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Speaker 1: Like he told us about the date? So nothing happened

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Speaker 1: on the date? This is really just uh, I'll just explain.

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Speaker 1: So I thought he was pretty cute, even though he

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Speaker 1: was crying, and I was gonna call him the next

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Speaker 1: day when I woke up. But you knew in the

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Speaker 1: morning you watch the news while you're getting ready for

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Speaker 1: work and all that. I mean maybe if you're a

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Speaker 1: senior citizens, but most of us don't social media. Okay, Okay,

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Speaker 1: well I watched Okay, Well, sorry didn't do Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: all watched the news in the morning. Okay, So what

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Speaker 1: happened when you watching the news. Um, so I saw

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Speaker 1: this segment and they had a sketch image of a

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Speaker 1: rapist that they were looking for, um who looked just

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Speaker 1: like Michael. Oh my gosh, you saw a police sketch

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Speaker 1: that you think is Michael? Yeah? And it rattled me

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Speaker 1: and I was too afraid to text him back. Yeah, okay, yeah,

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Speaker 1: I can't understand that. Like, what were the features that

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Speaker 1: made you believe it was him? Oh? I mean it

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Speaker 1: looked just like him, Like the facial hair was cut,

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Speaker 1: the same, same like face shape, the eyes. It just

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Speaker 1: was really uncanny. Do you think you should be calling

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Speaker 1: the authorities like that uncanny? Or you just don't want

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Speaker 1: to go out with him again? Whoa, I did that?

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Speaker 1: You called police? I called the police tipline and told

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Speaker 1: him about Michael. Oh my god, I don't know that

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Speaker 1: we should be doing this right now. Well, they called

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Speaker 1: me back and he turned out they caught the actual guy,

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Speaker 1: which is great, and it wasn't Michael. See was it him? No,

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Speaker 1: that was a big roller coaster. You just took us on.

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Speaker 1: Imagine how I felt. I went on the dates with

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Speaker 1: this guy who, for several hours I definitely thought was

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Speaker 1: this guy. The police were looking for Oh my god, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: that must have been really weird. But it's not it's

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Speaker 1: not him. Yeah, no, they caught the guy. But the

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Speaker 1: thing is, it's like, I can't get this image of

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Speaker 1: the sketch out of my head. It's not him, but

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Speaker 1: you're not going out with him just because you thought

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Speaker 1: it was him for a second. Okay, So you know

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Speaker 1: when a song reminds you of your ex and then

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Speaker 1: you can't listen to the song anymore, you know, like

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Speaker 1: what a police sketch reminds you of a rapist and

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Speaker 1: then you can't see that. What. No, I don't think

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Speaker 1: that that's fair. I mean, he's not the guy, but

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Speaker 1: he is on the phone right now and wants to

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Speaker 1: talk to you about it. Oh what do you mean

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Speaker 1: he's on the phone. Well, I mean this probably doesn't

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Speaker 1: help his like not being creepy case, but he's been

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Speaker 1: on the other line listening this whole time and wants

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Speaker 1: to talk to you. What. Yeah, Michael, are you there?

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, it's Michael. Oh my god, Michael, come

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Speaker 1: in with a different voice. Man, I'm sorry, I'm just

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Speaker 1: kind of taking it all in. Oh my god. That

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Speaker 1: is the worst appel gamer. That anybody could ever have,

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Speaker 1: Like Michael, that sucks. That's just so strange you called

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Speaker 1: the police on me. Um, I'm not a rapist. That

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Speaker 1: sounds good. Let's just put that out there. I've never

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Speaker 1: done rape none. Oh god, it's not like a drug

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Speaker 1: like you don't just like God, Okay, it's fine, you guys.

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Speaker 1: Do you hear him? Yeah, Rebecca, he's not the person

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Speaker 1: that committed this crime, so you shouldn't be afraid of him.

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Speaker 1: Did he tell you, guys, how we met? If I

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Speaker 1: look back at it, I'm like, oh, we kind of

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Speaker 1: met any creepy way. He has this creepy voice from

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Speaker 1: the phone. Okay, But none of that matters, because the

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Speaker 1: only thing that matters is that he is not the

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Speaker 1: person that you saw the police sketch of hell is

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Speaker 1: running into somebody on an elevator. It weren't creepy. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it wasn't like an abandoned elevator or something. And naively,

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Speaker 1: you guys are giving me a really hard time, and

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Speaker 1: I feel bad. I just was trying to be a

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Speaker 1: good citizen and I was nervous. I think, honestly react,

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Speaker 1: I think we all support your decision to call the police.

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Speaker 1: I think that that should always be something that you do. It.

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Speaker 1: Good on you for protecting yourself. But when they tell

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Speaker 1: you that you were wrong, that it wasn't him, then

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Speaker 1: you also have to kind of laugh at yourself and

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Speaker 1: be like, wow, thank god. You know, it's like you

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Speaker 1: had a good feeling about this guy in the beginning,

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Speaker 1: right you said yourself that you were going to call

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Speaker 1: him back that morning. It's just the sketch looks so

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Speaker 1: much like him. I'm not sure I can get it

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Speaker 1: out of my head. What if I send you, like

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Speaker 1: for new pictures that look nothing like that guy? Is

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Speaker 1: that really the best idea you could come up with? Like, yeah,

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Speaker 1: something I mean other than going out with me again,

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Speaker 1: you know, I mean that's really what what's going to

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Speaker 1: diffuse this whole like rapist persona thing that's been impressed

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Speaker 1: upon me. No, I have a better idea. I think

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Speaker 1: you have no other choice but to get some facial

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Speaker 1: reconstructive surgery, dye your hair, maybe wear some colored contacts

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Speaker 1: so you don't look like the sketch anymore. Maybe you're

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Speaker 1: willing to do that, you know, I could trim my

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Speaker 1: facial hair a little bit until this whole thing blows over.

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Speaker 1: Maybe here we go that actually might help. Okay, I mean, okay,

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Speaker 1: Rebecca's coming around on the idea. Honestly, he sounds genuine.

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Speaker 1: I mean, the man can't even handle hot salsa. He's

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Speaker 1: just a delicate little man. I could just grow salsa

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Speaker 1: to protect me. That's all you need. Yeah, there you go.

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Speaker 1: All right? Well good, So if you're willing to do this, Rebecca,

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Speaker 1: we'll pay for a second day with you and Michael. Michael,

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Speaker 1: are you sure you're okay with shaving your facial hair

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Speaker 1: and maybe even getting the haircut. It's not a problem.

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Speaker 1: I was thinking about getting a new do anyway. You know.

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Speaker 1: There you good? Look at ad. I mean, yeah, who

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Speaker 1: wants to look like a rapist? Anyway? Maybe it's time

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Speaker 1: no one? No one? Wow? All right, so successful second

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Speaker 1: date up that you guys are going out one more time.

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Speaker 1: We did it, all right. Let's just make sure that

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Speaker 1: wherever we go there's no TVs from the bar, so

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Speaker 1: nothing pops up on the screen. How many criminals can

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Speaker 1: look like you? Michael? You never know. You gotta play

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Speaker 1: it safe. Mike Broke and Jeffrey in the morning