1 00:00:05,680 --> 00:00:09,320 Speaker 1: Hi, and welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show. On iHeartRadio, 2 00:00:09,920 --> 00:00:15,240 Speaker 1: last episode, I talked about meeting someone when you feel 3 00:00:15,240 --> 00:00:17,840 Speaker 1: like you're running out of time to get married and 4 00:00:17,920 --> 00:00:21,279 Speaker 1: have a family. I gave five tips that I think 5 00:00:21,360 --> 00:00:24,880 Speaker 1: are useful, and they were treat it like a job, 6 00:00:25,520 --> 00:00:30,440 Speaker 1: don't bend on your must haves, have sane must haves, 7 00:00:31,360 --> 00:00:35,239 Speaker 1: give people who are not your type a chance, but 8 00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:39,440 Speaker 1: also don't settle, especially when it comes to attraction. I 9 00:00:39,520 --> 00:00:42,760 Speaker 1: forgot what I think is actually the most important one 10 00:00:43,320 --> 00:00:46,640 Speaker 1: that I've talked about on this show before. If you've 11 00:00:46,680 --> 00:00:50,800 Speaker 1: decided that you're serious about getting married, you have to 12 00:00:50,880 --> 00:00:53,960 Speaker 1: cut off anyone that you're spending time with that is 13 00:00:54,040 --> 00:00:57,120 Speaker 1: not the person you're going to marry. I see this 14 00:00:57,720 --> 00:01:03,280 Speaker 1: all the time that people have someone they're in a situationship, 15 00:01:03,320 --> 00:01:06,240 Speaker 1: as the kids say, they have someone they talk to 16 00:01:06,360 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 1: every day, they hang out with, maybe they have a 17 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:13,600 Speaker 1: physical relationship with, and this is definitively not the person 18 00:01:13,720 --> 00:01:17,959 Speaker 1: they're going to marry. I would say that having this 19 00:01:18,080 --> 00:01:22,080 Speaker 1: kind of side person in your life slows you way 20 00:01:22,720 --> 00:01:26,920 Speaker 1: way down for meeting the person that you will actually marry. 21 00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:31,560 Speaker 1: It fulfills so many needs to have someone like this, 22 00:01:31,800 --> 00:01:35,480 Speaker 1: and it decreases the urgency that you might feel to 23 00:01:35,520 --> 00:01:40,680 Speaker 1: find someone. I know it gets lonely. I know it's 24 00:01:40,760 --> 00:01:45,080 Speaker 1: nice to have someone, anyone to spend intimate time with, 25 00:01:46,000 --> 00:01:50,320 Speaker 1: but having that person is an actual roadblock for you 26 00:01:50,400 --> 00:01:54,400 Speaker 1: to meet your forever person. If you have someone in 27 00:01:54,440 --> 00:01:58,400 Speaker 1: your life who really wants to meet someone, put that 28 00:01:58,520 --> 00:02:01,840 Speaker 1: advice at the top of the lists that you give them. 29 00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:05,200 Speaker 1: They can't be spending time with someone who will never 30 00:02:05,240 --> 00:02:08,440 Speaker 1: be their spouse, or they won't find the one who 31 00:02:08,520 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 1: might be. I'm going to have tips for the younger 32 00:02:11,840 --> 00:02:15,160 Speaker 1: set in future episodes. If you've got suggestions, I love 33 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:18,520 Speaker 1: hearing them, Send them over. Carol Markowitz Show at gmail 34 00:02:18,560 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 1: dot com. It's k A r O L m A 35 00:02:21,800 --> 00:02:27,040 Speaker 1: r kow i cz Show at gmail dot com. So 36 00:02:27,160 --> 00:02:29,320 Speaker 1: many of you have checked out my new podcast, co 37 00:02:29,480 --> 00:02:32,960 Speaker 1: hosted with my good friend Mary Katherine Ham. It's called Normally, 38 00:02:33,240 --> 00:02:37,000 Speaker 1: and unlike this podcast, it is a political show. New 39 00:02:37,040 --> 00:02:41,120 Speaker 1: episodes are posted Tuesdays and Thursdays, and just like this show, 40 00:02:41,240 --> 00:02:44,120 Speaker 1: you can hear it anywhere you get your podcasts. Please 41 00:02:44,160 --> 00:02:47,880 Speaker 1: subscribe and tell your friends I appreciate you all so much. 42 00:02:48,280 --> 00:02:51,280 Speaker 1: Coming up next and interview with eric A Sanzi. Join 43 00:02:51,400 --> 00:02:54,400 Speaker 1: us after the break. Thanks so much for joining us 44 00:02:54,440 --> 00:02:58,240 Speaker 1: on The Carol Markowitz Show. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts. 45 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:05,080 Speaker 2: Welcome back to the Carol Markowitz Show on iHeartRadio. My 46 00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:08,720 Speaker 2: guest today is Erica Sanzi. Erica is director of outreach 47 00:03:08,760 --> 00:03:11,760 Speaker 2: at Parents Defending Education, where I'm also on the board 48 00:03:11,840 --> 00:03:15,680 Speaker 2: full disclosure, a mom of three teenage sons Woe, and 49 00:03:15,760 --> 00:03:19,760 Speaker 2: the founder of Love My View Sports Apparel, which focuses 50 00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:24,639 Speaker 2: on gratitude in the context of youth sports. Hi Erica, Hi, Carol. 51 00:03:24,680 --> 00:03:26,320 Speaker 3: Great to see you and so nice for me. 52 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:30,519 Speaker 2: So nice for you to come on. I am a 53 00:03:30,600 --> 00:03:36,000 Speaker 2: longtime fan of yours, obviously, but you recently came across 54 00:03:36,040 --> 00:03:39,840 Speaker 2: my feed in a million different places because you were 55 00:03:39,960 --> 00:03:43,000 Speaker 2: arguing something very interesting and I think you made some 56 00:03:43,240 --> 00:03:47,760 Speaker 2: very unique points, and it was about schools banning books. 57 00:03:48,240 --> 00:03:50,440 Speaker 2: So can you tell us about your work in this 58 00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:55,680 Speaker 2: area and your what your viral comments were. I think 59 00:03:55,680 --> 00:03:57,240 Speaker 2: they involved nude magazines. 60 00:03:57,680 --> 00:04:03,240 Speaker 3: Yes, I think that they involved Don't Play magazine. So first, 61 00:04:03,600 --> 00:04:06,320 Speaker 3: the book banning conversation is by far one of the 62 00:04:06,320 --> 00:04:11,000 Speaker 3: most frustrating and annoying conversations for anybody who really does 63 00:04:11,120 --> 00:04:14,160 Speaker 3: know what's going on on the ground. It's been one 64 00:04:14,200 --> 00:04:17,560 Speaker 3: of those things that tribalism has kicked in, and so 65 00:04:17,600 --> 00:04:20,120 Speaker 3: people keep picking up this book banning ball and running 66 00:04:20,120 --> 00:04:22,600 Speaker 3: with it. And I'm screaming at the television and at 67 00:04:22,600 --> 00:04:25,200 Speaker 3: the radio because I'm like, this is just not true. 68 00:04:25,880 --> 00:04:31,359 Speaker 3: So the whole frame of books being banned is wrong. 69 00:04:31,560 --> 00:04:35,040 Speaker 3: There really isn't anywhere that books are being banned. If 70 00:04:35,080 --> 00:04:38,120 Speaker 3: you can go into the local library in your town 71 00:04:38,160 --> 00:04:40,680 Speaker 3: or city, if you can go on Amazon, if you 72 00:04:40,720 --> 00:04:43,680 Speaker 3: can go into the bookstore and get these books, they're 73 00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:48,000 Speaker 3: obviously not banned. So the conversation is really about, you know, 74 00:04:49,040 --> 00:04:52,240 Speaker 3: library collections in schools, and I think all of us 75 00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:55,280 Speaker 3: know that a school library clearly cannot have every single 76 00:04:55,279 --> 00:04:57,640 Speaker 3: book in the universe in it. They have to make choices. 77 00:04:58,480 --> 00:05:01,279 Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure mine does not have The Art of 78 00:05:01,320 --> 00:05:04,080 Speaker 3: the Deal by Donald Trump, and I've never heard anybody 79 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:07,839 Speaker 3: complaining or saying that that book is banned. But what 80 00:05:08,000 --> 00:05:12,560 Speaker 3: has happened is that libraries have been against school libraries 81 00:05:12,880 --> 00:05:19,239 Speaker 3: have really been infiltrated with books that are highly ideological, 82 00:05:20,160 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 3: largely around the umbrella of LGBTQ. So we see a 83 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:31,400 Speaker 3: lot of books that obsess about sexual orientation, about transgender ideology, 84 00:05:32,480 --> 00:05:34,920 Speaker 3: and in the name of inclusion, they think that these 85 00:05:34,920 --> 00:05:37,160 Speaker 3: books are appropriate and needs to be in the school. 86 00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:40,160 Speaker 3: But the truth about these books is that they are 87 00:05:40,560 --> 00:05:47,760 Speaker 3: pretty new, horribly written, extremely vulgar. In many ways, they 88 00:05:47,800 --> 00:05:51,520 Speaker 3: present safeguarding challenges because some of these books actually teach 89 00:05:51,640 --> 00:05:55,360 Speaker 3: children how to do things like meet up with adults 90 00:05:55,480 --> 00:06:00,520 Speaker 3: on apps designed for people to find sexual partners. So 91 00:06:01,680 --> 00:06:04,839 Speaker 3: when people talk about their concerns about books and schools, 92 00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:08,000 Speaker 3: it really is a very different conversation than the one 93 00:06:08,000 --> 00:06:11,559 Speaker 3: that we may remember, you know, from forever, where people 94 00:06:11,560 --> 00:06:14,279 Speaker 3: were upset about certain Judy Bloom books, or people were 95 00:06:14,360 --> 00:06:19,600 Speaker 3: upset about books by Alice Walker or Tony Morrison because 96 00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:23,280 Speaker 3: there was a lot of sexual content in those very 97 00:06:23,400 --> 00:06:27,719 Speaker 3: rich works of literature. Right, we're not talking about literature. 98 00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:33,440 Speaker 3: We're talking about basically garbage books. But because all of 99 00:06:33,480 --> 00:06:37,480 Speaker 3: the institutions have been so captured, the American Library Association 100 00:06:37,600 --> 00:06:41,680 Speaker 3: being one of them, they look for books about sexual 101 00:06:41,720 --> 00:06:46,680 Speaker 3: orientation and transgender ideology. They name these books to award lists, 102 00:06:47,000 --> 00:06:50,880 Speaker 3: and these are the award lists that librarians have always 103 00:06:50,920 --> 00:06:53,320 Speaker 3: looked to when they're trying to add to their collection, 104 00:06:53,880 --> 00:06:55,839 Speaker 3: so they go on the award list, and there's never 105 00:06:55,880 --> 00:06:58,080 Speaker 3: been a reason for them to assume that the books 106 00:06:58,120 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 3: that they're buying for the school library are going to 107 00:07:01,640 --> 00:07:04,479 Speaker 3: be wildly inappropriate for students. 108 00:07:05,480 --> 00:07:08,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, I think, you know, it's interesting. We covered this 109 00:07:08,720 --> 00:07:11,720 Speaker 2: in our book Stolen Youth, which of course is probably 110 00:07:11,840 --> 00:07:15,120 Speaker 2: banned in your school library as well. Guys, maybe you 111 00:07:15,120 --> 00:07:18,360 Speaker 2: should all check that out and see my banned book 112 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:22,760 Speaker 2: is in your kids elementary school library. But they use 113 00:07:23,000 --> 00:07:27,680 Speaker 2: that LGBTQ thing as a shield. They use it, as 114 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 2: you know, you're not allowed to have these books, and 115 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:37,400 Speaker 2: it's because they're LGBTQ, and that's ridiculous. It's not because 116 00:07:37,440 --> 00:07:39,800 Speaker 2: I don't want a lot of these stories wouldn't make 117 00:07:39,840 --> 00:07:42,240 Speaker 2: sense to me in a straight context either. I don't 118 00:07:42,240 --> 00:07:45,800 Speaker 2: want my kids reading about kids meeting up with grown ups, 119 00:07:45,880 --> 00:07:48,200 Speaker 2: even if it's male and female or you know. 120 00:07:48,160 --> 00:07:49,640 Speaker 3: Whichever direction correct. 121 00:07:50,360 --> 00:07:52,520 Speaker 2: So I think that they use that as a crutch 122 00:07:52,640 --> 00:07:55,800 Speaker 2: to make it so that you really can't complain too 123 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:57,400 Speaker 2: much about it. And the thing that I want to 124 00:07:57,440 --> 00:08:01,280 Speaker 2: ask you about, you know, I thought that the Right 125 00:08:01,440 --> 00:08:05,080 Speaker 2: was doing a fantastic job on showing this kind of 126 00:08:05,080 --> 00:08:08,520 Speaker 2: stuff in libraries, like Ron DeSantis presenting these books at 127 00:08:08,560 --> 00:08:11,840 Speaker 2: a press conference and the media being unable to show 128 00:08:11,920 --> 00:08:14,280 Speaker 2: the books on TV. I thought it was all brilliant 129 00:08:14,320 --> 00:08:18,360 Speaker 2: and genius, and then an activist told me that it 130 00:08:18,560 --> 00:08:23,400 Speaker 2: wasn't polling. Well, it's that we were still seen as 131 00:08:23,520 --> 00:08:27,600 Speaker 2: book banners even though we were showing pictures of children, 132 00:08:28,240 --> 00:08:32,040 Speaker 2: you know, giving oral sex and that kind of thing. 133 00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:33,960 Speaker 1: So is that true? 134 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,840 Speaker 2: And how is that so? 135 00:08:36,800 --> 00:08:39,280 Speaker 3: Parents of any education? We did polling on this too, 136 00:08:39,559 --> 00:08:44,000 Speaker 3: and the polling on anything involving the words book banning 137 00:08:44,720 --> 00:08:48,679 Speaker 3: polls really badly because it's just a knee jerk reaction. 138 00:08:49,000 --> 00:08:53,120 Speaker 3: And I also think, to be honest, because many of 139 00:08:53,160 --> 00:08:59,720 Speaker 3: these texts are so incredibly and outrageously inappropriate. Most people 140 00:09:00,720 --> 00:09:03,840 Speaker 3: who you know, don't focus on this in their daily life, 141 00:09:04,360 --> 00:09:08,560 Speaker 3: do not believe that the content that people are describing 142 00:09:08,679 --> 00:09:10,840 Speaker 3: could possibly be true. 143 00:09:11,120 --> 00:09:13,920 Speaker 2: Right, So it's a challenge that. 144 00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:16,560 Speaker 3: Can't be happening, that can't be true, or it's that 145 00:09:16,720 --> 00:09:19,680 Speaker 3: has to be a one a one off, that's an outlier. 146 00:09:20,200 --> 00:09:24,280 Speaker 3: And you're realizing that actually again, and partly too because 147 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:27,240 Speaker 3: I was working in schools as recently as twenty fifteen. 148 00:09:27,840 --> 00:09:32,440 Speaker 3: In twenty fifteen, I didn't see these texts. So this 149 00:09:32,559 --> 00:09:37,960 Speaker 3: has been very quick new and so person thinks, well, 150 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,200 Speaker 3: when I was in school, you know, yeah, there was 151 00:09:40,280 --> 00:09:42,400 Speaker 3: like that Judy Bloom book. But come on, guys like 152 00:09:42,520 --> 00:09:46,079 Speaker 3: lighten up, or they just think that it can even that. 153 00:09:46,080 --> 00:09:49,480 Speaker 2: Judy Bloom book. I don't want it for my you know, 154 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:52,000 Speaker 2: sixth grader. I don't want it from my third grader. 155 00:09:52,240 --> 00:09:54,600 Speaker 2: My daughter's in ninth grade. I don't know, maybe another 156 00:09:54,720 --> 00:09:56,600 Speaker 2: year or two before I think she should be. You know, 157 00:09:56,640 --> 00:09:59,160 Speaker 2: we could read Forever by Judy Bloom. It was racy. 158 00:09:59,280 --> 00:10:02,000 Speaker 2: I remember that, so I did. If there's anything wrong 159 00:10:02,040 --> 00:10:04,920 Speaker 2: about keeping those books, even the Judy Blue books, out 160 00:10:04,960 --> 00:10:06,600 Speaker 2: of the hands of small children. 161 00:10:06,960 --> 00:10:08,960 Speaker 3: But at least on the Judy Bloom front, you could 162 00:10:08,960 --> 00:10:11,160 Speaker 3: probably go out for drinks or dinner with your friends 163 00:10:11,160 --> 00:10:13,320 Speaker 3: and you guys could have like a pretty like robust 164 00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:16,960 Speaker 3: discussion and disagreement about that. Whereas the text that we're 165 00:10:17,000 --> 00:10:20,480 Speaker 3: talking about, if you laid those out on the table 166 00:10:20,640 --> 00:10:23,480 Speaker 3: of a bunch of your friends, we'd be like uncomfortable 167 00:10:23,520 --> 00:10:26,640 Speaker 3: from it who have like different politics or who have 168 00:10:26,679 --> 00:10:29,480 Speaker 3: really different feelings about you know this, this idea of 169 00:10:29,920 --> 00:10:33,240 Speaker 3: you know, controlling what people can read. They would all 170 00:10:33,280 --> 00:10:36,439 Speaker 3: be like, this is insane and anybody that wants this 171 00:10:36,600 --> 00:10:40,640 Speaker 3: in schools is deranged, Right, Yeah, that's why you think 172 00:10:40,679 --> 00:10:44,120 Speaker 3: it's different. And I think it's polling really badly because 173 00:10:44,679 --> 00:10:46,480 Speaker 3: they're thinking back, you know, they're thinking back to the 174 00:10:46,520 --> 00:10:49,680 Speaker 3: movie Footloose when like you know, they're throwing books in 175 00:10:49,720 --> 00:10:52,559 Speaker 3: the garbage can and setting them on fire because they 176 00:10:52,600 --> 00:10:54,319 Speaker 3: talk about dancing. 177 00:10:55,200 --> 00:10:58,040 Speaker 2: And so I just think book's not about dancing. 178 00:10:57,880 --> 00:10:59,960 Speaker 3: Not about dancing, And I feel like it's just it's 179 00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:03,720 Speaker 3: it's an awareness thing where like you and me and 180 00:11:03,760 --> 00:11:05,800 Speaker 3: people that are really dialed in on this, like we 181 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:09,240 Speaker 3: have to sort of constantly remind ourselves that the average 182 00:11:09,240 --> 00:11:11,719 Speaker 3: person out there living their life is not focused on this. 183 00:11:12,160 --> 00:11:14,400 Speaker 3: They're hearing about it a little bit, it's not really 184 00:11:14,440 --> 00:11:17,760 Speaker 3: breaking through, and so like as much as we think, 185 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:21,080 Speaker 3: how do you not know this? I can speak to 186 00:11:21,280 --> 00:11:24,080 Speaker 3: all the people in my own life right who I'm 187 00:11:24,080 --> 00:11:26,360 Speaker 3: at this on the sidelines of my kid's games, or 188 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:30,600 Speaker 3: I'm at the grocery store and it's new to them, 189 00:11:31,000 --> 00:11:33,839 Speaker 3: or it's they've only heard a little bit about it, 190 00:11:33,880 --> 00:11:37,839 Speaker 3: but they really have no working knowledge of what's going on, 191 00:11:38,240 --> 00:11:40,320 Speaker 3: and I think that's also why the pulling on it 192 00:11:40,360 --> 00:11:40,840 Speaker 3: is so bad. 193 00:11:41,400 --> 00:11:44,199 Speaker 2: I talk about this a lot, but I always find 194 00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:48,240 Speaker 2: it a challenge to talk to Red state or Red 195 00:11:48,360 --> 00:11:52,640 Speaker 2: area audiences about this kind of stuff because they believe 196 00:11:52,679 --> 00:11:55,880 Speaker 2: it's happening. They think it's happening for sure, but not 197 00:11:55,960 --> 00:12:00,000 Speaker 2: at their kids' school. They think they somehow are immune 198 00:12:00,160 --> 00:12:01,920 Speaker 2: from it, like not in my kid's school. I live 199 00:12:01,920 --> 00:12:04,319 Speaker 2: in a deep red area, and you're just like, here's 200 00:12:04,320 --> 00:12:07,280 Speaker 2: a list of books, go find out, and they often 201 00:12:07,320 --> 00:12:10,440 Speaker 2: find out that, of course they have their Red state school, 202 00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:14,160 Speaker 2: their Red area school does have these books. And it's 203 00:12:14,160 --> 00:12:16,680 Speaker 2: a challenge because people love their local school. It's like 204 00:12:16,679 --> 00:12:19,600 Speaker 2: the whole thing would like you, Congress pulls badly, but 205 00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:22,319 Speaker 2: when you pull people about their individual Congress person, they 206 00:12:22,360 --> 00:12:25,480 Speaker 2: pull high that that's exactly what's happening here too. 207 00:12:25,520 --> 00:12:29,840 Speaker 3: I think, oh, one hundred percent, And again it's possible 208 00:12:29,840 --> 00:12:31,960 Speaker 3: it's not in their school. You know. I live in 209 00:12:32,000 --> 00:12:36,360 Speaker 3: a blue state, Rhode Island the smallest one, and there 210 00:12:36,400 --> 00:12:39,360 Speaker 3: are schools where they don't really have these books, and 211 00:12:39,360 --> 00:12:41,680 Speaker 3: then there's other ones where it's absolutely full of them. 212 00:12:42,080 --> 00:12:44,600 Speaker 3: So again it's you can't say for sure, but it 213 00:12:44,760 --> 00:12:47,920 Speaker 3: is completely naive and wrong to think that if you 214 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,160 Speaker 3: live in a red state or in a red district, 215 00:12:50,400 --> 00:12:54,120 Speaker 3: that you're not going to see these texts. Partly also 216 00:12:54,280 --> 00:12:59,160 Speaker 3: because again some people think back to like the librarian 217 00:12:59,240 --> 00:13:01,800 Speaker 3: who was like little old lady with the sweater hanging 218 00:13:01,840 --> 00:13:04,040 Speaker 3: on the back of her chair, and she was going around, 219 00:13:04,080 --> 00:13:07,600 Speaker 3: you know, telling people to stop talking and shushing people, 220 00:13:07,679 --> 00:13:11,760 Speaker 3: and she would have been horrified and mortified by these texts. 221 00:13:12,200 --> 00:13:15,920 Speaker 3: But that's not necessarily Also, who the librarians are now, 222 00:13:16,480 --> 00:13:19,920 Speaker 3: so you know, when you come up through the education 223 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:25,000 Speaker 3: system to become a school librarian, they're marinating in a 224 00:13:25,000 --> 00:13:28,319 Speaker 3: lot of this ideology. And so again some order off 225 00:13:28,320 --> 00:13:31,920 Speaker 3: the award list totally unwittingly and are like shocked when 226 00:13:31,920 --> 00:13:34,000 Speaker 3: this whole thing blows up in their face because they're thinking, 227 00:13:34,040 --> 00:13:37,240 Speaker 3: I had no idea. Others are totally on board with this, 228 00:13:37,400 --> 00:13:40,040 Speaker 3: and they want these books in their library, and they 229 00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:44,760 Speaker 3: are making displays in the school where they'll put, you know, 230 00:13:45,080 --> 00:13:48,839 Speaker 3: all of these books about gender ideology, all of these books, 231 00:13:48,840 --> 00:13:52,680 Speaker 3: you know, children's books about Harvey Milk, because they think 232 00:13:52,720 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 3: that young children have to know who Harvey Milk is 233 00:13:56,880 --> 00:13:58,680 Speaker 3: or else they're not an educated person. 234 00:14:00,320 --> 00:14:02,800 Speaker 2: So a question I ask all of my guests is 235 00:14:03,600 --> 00:14:05,400 Speaker 2: what do you worry about? What do you think is 236 00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:07,440 Speaker 2: our largest cultural problem? 237 00:14:07,520 --> 00:14:10,720 Speaker 3: I mean, there's many to pick from. So if I 238 00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:13,960 Speaker 3: had to name something, I think it would have to 239 00:14:14,040 --> 00:14:19,520 Speaker 3: do with our abdication of responsibility around projecting childhood. And 240 00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:21,200 Speaker 3: I'm actually not just saying this. I know you've wrote 241 00:14:21,200 --> 00:14:23,000 Speaker 3: a book called Stolen Youth, but this would have been. 242 00:14:23,040 --> 00:14:25,560 Speaker 3: This is my answer anyway, largely because again of the 243 00:14:25,600 --> 00:14:28,040 Speaker 3: work I do and the work I've done, it just 244 00:14:28,120 --> 00:14:33,600 Speaker 3: seems to me that we are burdening children with topics 245 00:14:33,640 --> 00:14:39,040 Speaker 3: and issues that don't belong anywhere on their radar, right right, So, 246 00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:41,720 Speaker 3: and so, for example, instead of it used to be 247 00:14:41,760 --> 00:14:44,280 Speaker 3: that you might have a child that is really dealing 248 00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:47,640 Speaker 3: with some really bad, tough issues, there's something really serious 249 00:14:47,720 --> 00:14:50,520 Speaker 3: going on, and that would be addressed. What has happened 250 00:14:50,560 --> 00:14:53,400 Speaker 3: now is they've sort of made it so that every child, 251 00:14:53,800 --> 00:14:57,520 Speaker 3: the default is now to make these topics that every 252 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:02,160 Speaker 3: child has to talk, right, right, So, so in sixth grade, 253 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:05,280 Speaker 3: when they fill out the I think it's like a 254 00:15:05,280 --> 00:15:08,000 Speaker 3: a youth risk or behavior survey or something like they're 255 00:15:08,960 --> 00:15:12,800 Speaker 3: bombarded with questions about suicide. Now, that's an eleven year 256 00:15:12,840 --> 00:15:16,560 Speaker 3: old child, And is it ever the case that there's 257 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:18,760 Speaker 3: something going on with a child at that age where 258 00:15:18,800 --> 00:15:21,720 Speaker 3: it needs to be discussed, Yes, But does it have 259 00:15:21,800 --> 00:15:24,920 Speaker 3: to be the default for every kid that something that 260 00:15:24,960 --> 00:15:27,320 Speaker 3: they never would have thought of, don't really know anything about, 261 00:15:27,400 --> 00:15:30,360 Speaker 3: and is scary, you know, is suddenly kind of pushed 262 00:15:30,400 --> 00:15:33,200 Speaker 3: in their face. And that's how I feel about, you know, 263 00:15:33,280 --> 00:15:36,560 Speaker 3: Like in the Chicago public schools, they're they're they're teaching 264 00:15:36,880 --> 00:15:40,800 Speaker 3: very technical sexual terms in pre K, and then they're 265 00:15:40,840 --> 00:15:44,080 Speaker 3: teaching the third graders that their sex is assigned at 266 00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:46,360 Speaker 3: birth and that they can be a boy or a 267 00:15:46,400 --> 00:15:48,920 Speaker 3: girl or anything or neither and it's their choice. It's like, 268 00:15:49,560 --> 00:15:53,640 Speaker 3: it's like putting aside how crazy that is. When you 269 00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:56,400 Speaker 3: layer on top of that how young these children are. 270 00:15:56,480 --> 00:15:59,640 Speaker 3: It's like, I'm always like, why are you talking to 271 00:15:59,800 --> 00:16:03,160 Speaker 3: chillchildren who put the their tooth under their pillow for 272 00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:06,120 Speaker 3: the truth carey and sit on Santa Claus's lap because 273 00:16:06,160 --> 00:16:10,320 Speaker 3: they literally believe he comes down their chimney, like their 274 00:16:10,400 --> 00:16:13,080 Speaker 3: childhood is supposed to be magical. And it's like this 275 00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:20,280 Speaker 3: weird new movement of burdening them with things that are 276 00:16:20,360 --> 00:16:26,040 Speaker 3: completely outside they're even like their developmental ability to comprehend. 277 00:16:26,440 --> 00:16:30,760 Speaker 3: But also it's like you take the worst situations that 278 00:16:30,800 --> 00:16:34,320 Speaker 3: could be facing children and then you force every child 279 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:36,360 Speaker 3: to grapple with it. 280 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:39,560 Speaker 2: And I think, I think these kids want to believe 281 00:16:39,600 --> 00:16:42,120 Speaker 2: what adults are telling them, so they end up really 282 00:16:42,160 --> 00:16:46,560 Speaker 2: internalizing this stuff, and especially the suicide stuff. I think that's, 283 00:16:46,640 --> 00:16:50,200 Speaker 2: you know, obviously so dangerous. It's you could plant an 284 00:16:50,240 --> 00:16:52,760 Speaker 2: idea in a kid that never had that idea before 285 00:16:53,240 --> 00:16:56,840 Speaker 2: so easily, And I don't know how it isn't a 286 00:16:56,880 --> 00:16:59,200 Speaker 2: wider conversation about this. 287 00:16:59,680 --> 00:17:03,280 Speaker 3: Yeah. I mean, like I've posted screenshots of the surveys 288 00:17:03,040 --> 00:17:05,480 Speaker 3: to show people, and you get a lot of people 289 00:17:05,480 --> 00:17:07,800 Speaker 3: that think it's outrageous and terrible. But then there's always 290 00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:10,080 Speaker 3: the ones, Yeah, but what if a kid, you know, 291 00:17:10,160 --> 00:17:14,880 Speaker 3: has a problem, And I'm like, that would be handled individually, right, 292 00:17:15,000 --> 00:17:18,080 Speaker 3: Like that is something that you address. You don't make 293 00:17:18,720 --> 00:17:22,400 Speaker 3: every single child in the sixth grade. I think it's 294 00:17:22,400 --> 00:17:24,679 Speaker 3: actually six through twelve because they that The other crazy 295 00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:26,680 Speaker 3: thing is they ask the sixth graders the same questions 296 00:17:26,680 --> 00:17:29,840 Speaker 3: as the twelfth graders. But it's like you don't, because, 297 00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:34,680 Speaker 3: especially if a child is predisposed to any sort of anxiety, 298 00:17:34,760 --> 00:17:37,840 Speaker 3: some of those questions really can scare them and can 299 00:17:37,840 --> 00:17:40,080 Speaker 3: get into their head. And it's like you took a 300 00:17:40,160 --> 00:17:43,000 Speaker 3: kid that had no issue going and no problem, and 301 00:17:42,720 --> 00:17:45,600 Speaker 3: now they've they've got a problem because they were forced 302 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,400 Speaker 3: to answer these questions. So I just think that that 303 00:17:48,680 --> 00:17:51,639 Speaker 3: is this idea that we that we burden them with 304 00:17:51,720 --> 00:17:56,560 Speaker 3: adult topics and we pathologize their childhood so that because 305 00:17:56,560 --> 00:17:58,880 Speaker 3: it almost like it's like this equity thing, right, Well, 306 00:17:58,920 --> 00:18:01,359 Speaker 3: if a few kids are going through this, then we 307 00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:04,280 Speaker 3: need to make sure that every child is aware of 308 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:06,960 Speaker 3: it and we're asking them about it. I mean an 309 00:18:07,000 --> 00:18:09,560 Speaker 3: example is, and I only know this because during COVID 310 00:18:09,600 --> 00:18:12,280 Speaker 3: they had to fill out this survey at home. So 311 00:18:12,400 --> 00:18:14,480 Speaker 3: my son's at the dining room table. He's in the 312 00:18:14,520 --> 00:18:19,280 Speaker 3: sixth grade at the time, and he's like, he yells out, 313 00:18:19,600 --> 00:18:24,600 Speaker 3: I was He's like, I was drunk or stoned. So 314 00:18:24,680 --> 00:18:26,760 Speaker 3: I'm like, what are you doing And he's like, well, 315 00:18:26,800 --> 00:18:29,040 Speaker 3: I'm filling out this survey and I'm trying to answer 316 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:31,919 Speaker 3: this question about why I was absent. He's like, and 317 00:18:31,960 --> 00:18:35,320 Speaker 3: I'm looking for a choice that says doctor's appointment, but 318 00:18:35,480 --> 00:18:39,920 Speaker 3: instead all the choices were things like I'm being bullied 319 00:18:39,960 --> 00:18:43,639 Speaker 3: so badly. I don't want to go to school. You know, 320 00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:47,719 Speaker 3: we didn't have any transportation to get there. I was drunk. Oh, 321 00:18:47,720 --> 00:18:51,640 Speaker 3: that's what it was. I was drunk or high. There 322 00:18:51,720 --> 00:18:56,480 Speaker 3: was another one about you know, oh, I had to 323 00:18:56,640 --> 00:18:58,199 Speaker 3: go with my parents. I had to go with my 324 00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:02,560 Speaker 3: family to help them with translation. Like it's so it's like, 325 00:19:02,600 --> 00:19:05,320 Speaker 3: here you have a kid who's like I just had 326 00:19:05,320 --> 00:19:07,600 Speaker 3: a doctor's appointment that was kind of far away, so 327 00:19:07,640 --> 00:19:11,600 Speaker 3: I had to miss the whole day, and those are 328 00:19:11,720 --> 00:19:13,800 Speaker 3: like like he because it's like now you're like, wait, 329 00:19:14,520 --> 00:19:16,600 Speaker 3: there's kids who stay home from school because they're really 330 00:19:16,600 --> 00:19:19,760 Speaker 3: badly bullied, Like it becomes this It also. 331 00:19:19,760 --> 00:19:23,640 Speaker 2: I could get drunk or stoned, Like I think that 332 00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:25,640 Speaker 2: kind of also plants that idea. 333 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:26,680 Speaker 3: And also I'm eleven. 334 00:19:26,920 --> 00:19:29,000 Speaker 2: I never think that that's even an option for them. 335 00:19:29,080 --> 00:19:31,000 Speaker 2: Is suddenly like wait, kids do this. 336 00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:33,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, Like and also I'm like he's eleven, Like why 337 00:19:33,560 --> 00:19:37,440 Speaker 3: are you suggesting that that a plausible reason that he's 338 00:19:37,480 --> 00:19:41,560 Speaker 3: not at school is that he's drunk or high exactly? 339 00:19:41,800 --> 00:19:44,680 Speaker 3: And again, it's not that it's never happened. I've worked 340 00:19:44,680 --> 00:19:47,520 Speaker 3: in schools long enough to know yes, but again that 341 00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:50,359 Speaker 3: is the outlier case, and you've now made it the 342 00:19:50,400 --> 00:19:54,479 Speaker 3: default for every child in this because of some weird 343 00:19:55,400 --> 00:19:58,639 Speaker 3: I don't even really understand the reasoning, but I just 344 00:19:58,640 --> 00:20:02,199 Speaker 3: think it's bad for kids. And I also think again, like, 345 00:20:03,280 --> 00:20:07,280 Speaker 3: I get it, you need to track, you know, youth behavior. 346 00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:09,440 Speaker 3: You're looking to see if kids are smoking and drinking 347 00:20:09,520 --> 00:20:12,400 Speaker 3: and having sex, and so I understand that they feel 348 00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:17,440 Speaker 3: the need to collect this information, but I'm increasingly opposed 349 00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:21,520 Speaker 3: to the school being the vehicle because I think that 350 00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,719 Speaker 3: the questions have become really inappropriate. I think that again, 351 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:28,840 Speaker 3: parents have no idea what's on these surveys. I was shocked, 352 00:20:29,280 --> 00:20:31,159 Speaker 3: and I'm betting dialed into this, and I had no 353 00:20:31,280 --> 00:20:35,720 Speaker 3: idea that the questions had become so invasive and really 354 00:20:35,800 --> 00:20:39,239 Speaker 3: about really mature topics at younger and younger grades. So 355 00:20:39,680 --> 00:20:41,800 Speaker 3: again that's my very long way of saying, like, I 356 00:20:41,920 --> 00:20:45,200 Speaker 3: just think that we're failing our children in because we're like, 357 00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:48,199 Speaker 3: it's almost like we're swapping out the magic of childhood 358 00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,119 Speaker 3: for like adult problems. 359 00:20:50,560 --> 00:20:54,239 Speaker 1: That's exactly right in these uncertain times. Rising crime in 360 00:20:54,280 --> 00:20:58,920 Speaker 1: America's neighborhoods endangers the safety of loved ones. 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I'll be right back with more from Erica Sanzi. 383 00:22:36,040 --> 00:22:39,320 Speaker 2: You have this job where you help protect kids, You 384 00:22:39,640 --> 00:22:43,399 Speaker 2: have a beautiful family, you have a new apparel line. 385 00:22:43,520 --> 00:22:45,959 Speaker 2: Love my view, do you feel like you've made it? 386 00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:49,320 Speaker 3: I feel like I've made it, so, I mean, I 387 00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:52,520 Speaker 3: guess I would say that you're always kind of like evolving, right, 388 00:22:52,600 --> 00:22:58,880 Speaker 3: so at least for me, like I don't mentally sit still. Well. So, 389 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:01,919 Speaker 3: on the one hand, yes, because to your point, I 390 00:23:01,960 --> 00:23:05,880 Speaker 3: have a beautiful family. My parents are still alive and healthy. 391 00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:12,360 Speaker 3: I have a strong marriage. I don't, you know, struggle 392 00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:15,119 Speaker 3: to figure out how we're going to eat or if 393 00:23:15,160 --> 00:23:16,719 Speaker 3: there's going to be a roof over ihead like our 394 00:23:16,760 --> 00:23:20,320 Speaker 3: basic needs are definitely met. So in all of that, Oh, 395 00:23:20,320 --> 00:23:21,679 Speaker 3: and I have a job that I love, and I 396 00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:27,119 Speaker 3: have colleagues that I love right, So yes, on the 397 00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:31,520 Speaker 3: other hand, I feel like there's like more, but it's 398 00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:33,760 Speaker 3: not more like, oh, I want to make more money, 399 00:23:33,920 --> 00:23:36,320 Speaker 3: or oh I want more status, or oh I want 400 00:23:36,359 --> 00:23:38,560 Speaker 3: to get you know, make my platform really huge and 401 00:23:38,600 --> 00:23:43,200 Speaker 3: become famous. It's more like I don't mentally stay still. 402 00:23:43,400 --> 00:23:46,120 Speaker 3: I think is the issue. Right, So when people talk 403 00:23:46,160 --> 00:23:50,280 Speaker 3: about how much they love all their free time because 404 00:23:50,280 --> 00:23:52,200 Speaker 3: they can like do their hobbies, like I'm a little 405 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:55,760 Speaker 3: bit like, yeah, I don't think I really have hobbies because. 406 00:23:56,119 --> 00:23:59,200 Speaker 2: So my hobby is saving the next generation, right. 407 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:01,879 Speaker 3: So like this this new thing that I'm doing. So 408 00:24:02,040 --> 00:24:05,600 Speaker 3: here's an example of something. So just call and this 409 00:24:06,720 --> 00:24:07,399 Speaker 3: just start. 410 00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:09,680 Speaker 2: For the audio listeners. Erica showed us a hat that 411 00:24:09,760 --> 00:24:11,280 Speaker 2: sulf love my view. 412 00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:13,600 Speaker 3: And there's a football in place of the Oh. I 413 00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:15,359 Speaker 3: actually have another one over here which I made. My 414 00:24:15,440 --> 00:24:17,920 Speaker 3: husband just got his band back together, so I made 415 00:24:17,960 --> 00:24:20,840 Speaker 3: this one with the guitar and the guitar oh nice, 416 00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:23,199 Speaker 3: so that when I'm playing the role of groupie, I 417 00:24:23,240 --> 00:24:27,119 Speaker 3: can wear that. But so this is just like a 418 00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:29,520 Speaker 3: new thing for me that I feel like is like 419 00:24:29,560 --> 00:24:34,280 Speaker 3: another chapter. And it's largely because one of my favorite 420 00:24:34,359 --> 00:24:37,800 Speaker 3: favorite things in my life could be my favorite thing 421 00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:41,520 Speaker 3: actually is watching my kids play sports. In fact, my 422 00:24:41,600 --> 00:24:44,840 Speaker 3: oldest after fourteen years of playing baseball, just played his 423 00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:49,240 Speaker 3: last game a few weeks ago, and it's a loss. 424 00:24:49,280 --> 00:24:52,320 Speaker 3: Like it's a real feeling of loss. And it doesn't 425 00:24:52,359 --> 00:24:54,440 Speaker 3: matter that it's baseball. It it would be anything, you know 426 00:24:54,440 --> 00:24:56,679 Speaker 3: what I mean, if your child had played the piano 427 00:24:56,760 --> 00:24:58,840 Speaker 3: or been in musicals or dance their whole life and 428 00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:00,480 Speaker 3: then you go to the last perform and it would 429 00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:02,119 Speaker 3: be the same thing. It's this idea of getting to 430 00:25:02,200 --> 00:25:05,359 Speaker 3: watch your children do what they love and thrive. Ette 431 00:25:06,840 --> 00:25:09,280 Speaker 3: So the whole point. So years ago, I would go 432 00:25:09,359 --> 00:25:11,919 Speaker 3: on Twitter and I would take a picture of the 433 00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:17,000 Speaker 3: field or the basketball court, you know, and I would 434 00:25:17,920 --> 00:25:20,080 Speaker 3: just write the words love my view next to that picture. 435 00:25:20,600 --> 00:25:23,000 Speaker 3: And after a bunch of years, I just thought, you know, 436 00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:25,639 Speaker 3: like this is kind of a cool thing and it 437 00:25:26,160 --> 00:25:28,639 Speaker 3: and at first it started out as like an idea 438 00:25:28,720 --> 00:25:32,200 Speaker 3: where I was like, Okay, youth sports is a kind 439 00:25:32,240 --> 00:25:36,600 Speaker 3: of like a stew of lots of emotions and behaviors. 440 00:25:37,960 --> 00:25:40,879 Speaker 3: Some are very positive, some are not so positive. So 441 00:25:40,960 --> 00:25:44,240 Speaker 3: my thought was like if you just for a moment 442 00:25:44,320 --> 00:25:48,119 Speaker 3: say to yourself, like, I'm so lucky. This is what 443 00:25:48,160 --> 00:25:50,120 Speaker 3: I get to do, this is what I get to watch, 444 00:25:50,200 --> 00:25:53,600 Speaker 3: This is what I get to see, it's like it 445 00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:57,879 Speaker 3: brings gratitude into that stew So it doesn't mean that 446 00:25:57,920 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 3: you're not you know, people aren't going to be mad 447 00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:02,040 Speaker 3: at the rest for a kid got dropped in the 448 00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:06,760 Speaker 3: batting order, or you know, mad because something didn't go 449 00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:09,720 Speaker 3: their way. Like I'm not I'm not naive enough to 450 00:26:09,720 --> 00:26:11,800 Speaker 3: think that all that goes away because there is kind 451 00:26:11,840 --> 00:26:15,840 Speaker 3: of a natural tension between competition and gratitude. But on 452 00:26:15,880 --> 00:26:18,199 Speaker 3: the other hand, they also kind of fit nicely together 453 00:26:18,320 --> 00:26:21,119 Speaker 3: because part of what people love about that is the competition. 454 00:26:22,200 --> 00:26:25,040 Speaker 3: So yeah, so it started out as just a sports thing, 455 00:26:25,600 --> 00:26:28,160 Speaker 3: but parents have reached out to me and said, I 456 00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:32,080 Speaker 3: love this concept so much of loving my view as 457 00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:35,439 Speaker 3: it pertains to my children or my grandchildren. But my 458 00:26:35,520 --> 00:26:37,760 Speaker 3: kids don't play sports. So they'll say, you know, my 459 00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:41,240 Speaker 3: daughter is really into music and she does singing and 460 00:26:41,240 --> 00:26:44,600 Speaker 3: she does musicals, and so my answer was, well, then 461 00:26:44,600 --> 00:26:51,600 Speaker 3: I'll make that so I love that on sports collection now. 462 00:26:51,760 --> 00:26:53,920 Speaker 3: So like if you're you know, and and I keep 463 00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:58,640 Speaker 3: getting I get like requests, and because I'm just swapping 464 00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:02,080 Speaker 3: in a new design for the oh and love, I 465 00:27:02,119 --> 00:27:04,440 Speaker 3: can actually do it really easily. So even if it's 466 00:27:04,440 --> 00:27:07,359 Speaker 3: like a one off that almost nobody else wants. Like 467 00:27:07,400 --> 00:27:10,320 Speaker 3: to give an example, there's a woman that I know 468 00:27:10,400 --> 00:27:14,400 Speaker 3: whose son is on track and field at University Wisconsin. 469 00:27:14,480 --> 00:27:16,600 Speaker 3: He does the hammer throw, and of course she's like, 470 00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:20,040 Speaker 3: you're obviously not going to have like a hammer throw design, 471 00:27:20,840 --> 00:27:23,680 Speaker 3: and I was like, well, I'll make one for you, right, 472 00:27:23,880 --> 00:27:25,080 Speaker 3: you know what I mean, Like I can do that. 473 00:27:25,359 --> 00:27:27,359 Speaker 3: So yeah, So it's so it's and again, part of 474 00:27:27,400 --> 00:27:30,679 Speaker 3: this is I spent my weekends for over a decade 475 00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:33,080 Speaker 3: every Saturday and Sunday at my kids' games. But as 476 00:27:33,160 --> 00:27:35,840 Speaker 3: kids get older, the games aren't on the weekends really, 477 00:27:36,320 --> 00:27:38,679 Speaker 3: and so you wake up on Saturday morning and you're like, 478 00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:42,480 Speaker 3: I have nowhere to be. And some people are like, 479 00:27:42,520 --> 00:27:44,679 Speaker 3: here's oh my god, you must love that, but like 480 00:27:44,760 --> 00:27:48,360 Speaker 3: for me, it's a void. And part of the way 481 00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:51,080 Speaker 3: that I'm avoiding my midlife crisis is I started this 482 00:27:51,080 --> 00:27:53,080 Speaker 3: this a local writer did a story on it and 483 00:27:53,080 --> 00:27:55,639 Speaker 3: he called it my passion project. So I'm doing this 484 00:27:55,680 --> 00:27:58,040 Speaker 3: sort of love my view passion project. And my son 485 00:27:58,080 --> 00:28:00,760 Speaker 3: got and my husband got his band back together after 486 00:28:00,800 --> 00:28:02,840 Speaker 3: twenty three years, so I feel like we're like we're 487 00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:04,639 Speaker 3: avoiding that, like this is great. 488 00:28:04,720 --> 00:28:08,040 Speaker 2: This is like crisis of why you get a corvette, 489 00:28:08,119 --> 00:28:09,160 Speaker 2: you know, It's exactly. 490 00:28:09,160 --> 00:28:11,040 Speaker 3: Really that's the thing. I'm not going to get a corvette, 491 00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:12,480 Speaker 3: and I'm probably not going to go get a boob 492 00:28:12,560 --> 00:28:15,040 Speaker 3: job or I don't know something. So instead I'm like, 493 00:28:15,640 --> 00:28:19,560 Speaker 3: I'm finding fulfillment in this project. It's it is a company, 494 00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:21,720 Speaker 3: and of course, like, oh my gosh, if it like 495 00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,679 Speaker 3: became super successful, that would be great, but really it 496 00:28:24,800 --> 00:28:27,520 Speaker 3: is also just like it's like me taking this thing 497 00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:29,760 Speaker 3: that I find so meaningful and that I feel like 498 00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:32,040 Speaker 3: really resonates with people and just trying to like put 499 00:28:32,080 --> 00:28:32,960 Speaker 3: it out there in the world. 500 00:28:33,280 --> 00:28:35,200 Speaker 2: I love that, I really do. I think that that's 501 00:28:35,200 --> 00:28:36,879 Speaker 2: a really good idea, and I love the idea of 502 00:28:36,960 --> 00:28:41,560 Speaker 2: staving off your midlife crisis and doing something productive and 503 00:28:42,240 --> 00:28:43,560 Speaker 2: you know, kind of pretty with it. 504 00:28:43,840 --> 00:28:45,520 Speaker 3: So yeah, no, it is it's a great it's it 505 00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:47,560 Speaker 3: actually is, and I've really enjoyed it. And I was 506 00:28:47,720 --> 00:28:49,560 Speaker 3: only going to do four sports because I was because 507 00:28:49,560 --> 00:28:51,440 Speaker 3: I'm trying to trade, you know, I'm in the trademark 508 00:28:51,440 --> 00:28:54,080 Speaker 3: process with all of this. But I was like, you 509 00:28:54,120 --> 00:28:55,920 Speaker 3: know what, like I'm just going to like if people 510 00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:57,479 Speaker 3: want something and I can make it. I'm just going 511 00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:01,400 Speaker 3: to make it because why not. That's the whole that's 512 00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:03,240 Speaker 3: kind of the whole fun of it, right, is they're like, oh, 513 00:29:03,280 --> 00:29:05,960 Speaker 3: I love this concept. I got a message this morning 514 00:29:06,280 --> 00:29:08,680 Speaker 3: from somebody asking me, is there any way you can 515 00:29:08,720 --> 00:29:12,640 Speaker 3: make a hat with a fishing pole? And I'm like, yes, ma'am, yep. 516 00:29:12,840 --> 00:29:14,920 Speaker 2: And as soon as take the special orders, I like it. 517 00:29:15,080 --> 00:29:17,560 Speaker 3: Yeah. So anyway, so it's so, it's it's awesome. I 518 00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:17,880 Speaker 3: love it. 519 00:29:18,200 --> 00:29:20,160 Speaker 2: Well, I love talking to you. I think you're doing 520 00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:24,000 Speaker 2: some really great work. And here with your best tip 521 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:26,720 Speaker 2: for my listeners on how they can improve their lives. 522 00:29:27,720 --> 00:29:30,680 Speaker 3: Oh well, well, this is becoming a theme, I guess 523 00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:33,240 Speaker 3: because I just mentioned it. But I would one hundred 524 00:29:33,280 --> 00:29:39,800 Speaker 3: percent say, like, trying to focus on feeling gratitude is 525 00:29:39,880 --> 00:29:41,840 Speaker 3: really important. And it's funny I did. I wrote a 526 00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:43,680 Speaker 3: column on this, probably a couple of years ago. And 527 00:29:43,720 --> 00:29:46,320 Speaker 3: so the research is there obviously that this does improve 528 00:29:46,360 --> 00:29:51,240 Speaker 3: our lives. But as I'm in this stage of where 529 00:29:51,280 --> 00:29:54,040 Speaker 3: suddenly all of my children are taller than I am, 530 00:29:54,160 --> 00:29:55,840 Speaker 3: one of them is already out of the house, another 531 00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:59,240 Speaker 3: one is a senior, partly because it goes by so 532 00:29:59,560 --> 00:30:04,080 Speaker 3: fast that it's like and it's so easy to be 533 00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:08,200 Speaker 3: frustrated about things also related to our children and our families, 534 00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:11,440 Speaker 3: just because it's like tries your patience and it's and 535 00:30:11,480 --> 00:30:15,120 Speaker 3: it's frustrating and it's a lot. But just like taking 536 00:30:15,120 --> 00:30:19,000 Speaker 3: that moment and finding things to be grateful for really 537 00:30:19,080 --> 00:30:22,640 Speaker 3: does turn around your your mindset, right, So even if 538 00:30:22,680 --> 00:30:27,640 Speaker 3: there are things that are bothering you deciding I'm just 539 00:30:27,680 --> 00:30:29,400 Speaker 3: gonna I'm just gonna think of some things that I'm 540 00:30:29,400 --> 00:30:32,080 Speaker 3: really grateful for. I just think it reframes and I 541 00:30:32,120 --> 00:30:36,080 Speaker 3: think that and I think that the way that our 542 00:30:36,120 --> 00:30:38,320 Speaker 3: society and culture is right now, which just feels a 543 00:30:38,480 --> 00:30:40,840 Speaker 3: kind of negative and it feels very sort of like 544 00:30:42,080 --> 00:30:44,600 Speaker 3: gotcha all the time and people kind of mean to 545 00:30:44,680 --> 00:30:47,840 Speaker 3: each other. I just have to believe that like if again, 546 00:30:47,880 --> 00:30:51,080 Speaker 3: if we bring gratitude into this like toxic stew, like 547 00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:54,000 Speaker 3: it has to help, It can't hurt, hurt. It's not 548 00:30:54,040 --> 00:30:56,440 Speaker 3: going to fix everything, but it can't hurt. So that 549 00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:57,280 Speaker 3: would be my answer. 550 00:30:57,760 --> 00:31:00,840 Speaker 2: Love it. She is Rika Sanzi. Check out her love 551 00:31:00,920 --> 00:31:04,240 Speaker 2: my View sports apparel. Thank you so much for coming on, Erica. 552 00:31:04,320 --> 00:31:05,880 Speaker 3: Carol, Thanks so much for having me, and thank you 553 00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:06,479 Speaker 3: for everything you did. 554 00:31:06,560 --> 00:31:08,440 Speaker 1: Thanks so much for joining us on the Carol Marco 555 00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:13,400 Speaker 1: which show. Subscribe wherever you get your podcasts.