1 00:00:00,680 --> 00:00:01,320 Speaker 1: What what? 2 00:00:01,240 --> 00:00:01,440 Speaker 2: What? 3 00:00:01,440 --> 00:00:03,320 Speaker 3: What? What do we start with here? Scottie? 4 00:00:03,760 --> 00:00:05,040 Speaker 1: I think I got one? Are you ready? 5 00:00:06,080 --> 00:00:07,280 Speaker 2: Kurt? I am ready? 6 00:00:08,480 --> 00:00:13,000 Speaker 3: Baboons carrying knives and chainsawce spotted in Safari park. 7 00:00:14,120 --> 00:00:15,560 Speaker 2: I knew you were going to do this one. I 8 00:00:15,600 --> 00:00:19,360 Speaker 2: had this one too, all right, I mean baboons. That's 9 00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:28,840 Speaker 2: totally gonna be bananas. 10 00:00:22,720 --> 00:00:25,600 Speaker 4: Still, worlds? 11 00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:27,880 Speaker 1: Would you believe. 12 00:00:32,360 --> 00:00:35,400 Speaker 4: My jo sillion pieces? Would? 13 00:00:47,560 --> 00:00:51,120 Speaker 3: Ladies and gentlemen, Welcome to Bananas. I'm Kurt brown Oorner and. 14 00:00:51,200 --> 00:00:53,960 Speaker 2: I'm Scottie Landis. Thank you for listening to the silliest 15 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:57,120 Speaker 2: little podcast ever was Kurt? How are you feeling? 16 00:00:57,520 --> 00:00:58,400 Speaker 1: I'm good? How are you? 17 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:02,240 Speaker 2: I'm so good. It's just a I just sat on 18 00:01:02,320 --> 00:01:04,399 Speaker 2: my deck all morning and drank coffee, so now I'm 19 00:01:04,440 --> 00:01:05,200 Speaker 2: ready for anything. 20 00:01:05,600 --> 00:01:09,000 Speaker 3: All right, Well, I am excited about our guest today. 21 00:01:09,520 --> 00:01:13,720 Speaker 3: She's an absolutely fantastic comedian and also runs her own 22 00:01:13,720 --> 00:01:17,479 Speaker 3: weekly podcast game show called Let's Go Ots Go. Ladies 23 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:20,000 Speaker 3: and gentlemen, welcome to the show. OT's Goo o Katsuka. 24 00:01:20,920 --> 00:01:26,680 Speaker 4: Yeah, can I call it for myself? Thank you so 25 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:28,360 Speaker 4: much for having me, Hi kur. 26 00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:31,480 Speaker 1: Hi, Scottie, Hi, how's your day so far? 27 00:01:32,160 --> 00:01:34,520 Speaker 4: It was so great. I didn't know about that baboon. 28 00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:35,920 Speaker 4: Now I'm picturing it. 29 00:01:36,080 --> 00:01:41,600 Speaker 3: Oh, it's very, very exciting. I am so thrilled. Should 30 00:01:41,600 --> 00:01:42,720 Speaker 3: I just tell you all about it? 31 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:45,520 Speaker 4: Yeah? Yeah, there were weapons involved? 32 00:01:45,600 --> 00:01:50,400 Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, okay, So this is from Yahoo News. This 33 00:01:50,560 --> 00:01:56,800 Speaker 3: is by Ellen Manning. Baboons at a popular safari park 34 00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 3: have been spotted with knives, screwdrivers, and even a chains 35 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:05,240 Speaker 3: according to reports. The primates at Nosley Nosley or Nosley, 36 00:02:05,480 --> 00:02:09,080 Speaker 3: I don't know, it's outside Liverpool Safari Park in meyer 37 00:02:09,240 --> 00:02:12,560 Speaker 3: Side are already known for their destructive abilities and have 38 00:02:12,720 --> 00:02:16,760 Speaker 3: been pictured previously pulling things from visitors cars, but now 39 00:02:16,919 --> 00:02:20,280 Speaker 3: some staff are concerned that the baboons are being given 40 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:24,160 Speaker 3: weapons quote for a laugh by park goers, According to 41 00:02:24,200 --> 00:02:27,680 Speaker 3: the Sunday Time, Oh my God. One worker told the newspaper, 42 00:02:27,760 --> 00:02:30,079 Speaker 3: We're not sure if they're being given weapons by some 43 00:02:30,200 --> 00:02:32,320 Speaker 3: of the guests who want to see them attack cars, 44 00:02:32,760 --> 00:02:35,600 Speaker 3: or if they're fishing them out of pickup trucks and vans. 45 00:02:36,320 --> 00:02:36,440 Speaker 5: Uh. 46 00:02:36,639 --> 00:02:39,480 Speaker 3: The workers said the animals sometimes going to people's toolboxes 47 00:02:39,560 --> 00:02:41,680 Speaker 3: to grab what they can, adding, one of the baboons 48 00:02:41,800 --> 00:02:45,880 Speaker 3: was seen lugging around the chainsaw. I hope he doesn't 49 00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:49,640 Speaker 3: know how to turn it on. Um yeah, and then 50 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:51,720 Speaker 3: that is it goes on and just tells us more. 51 00:02:51,760 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 3: There's no more new information about that. Have I mean, 52 00:02:55,120 --> 00:02:56,680 Speaker 3: have you guys ever been to like one of these 53 00:02:56,760 --> 00:02:58,800 Speaker 3: drive through safari parks? They're crazy? 54 00:02:59,800 --> 00:03:03,440 Speaker 4: I've never I mean because I don't know how I yeah, 55 00:03:03,480 --> 00:03:05,919 Speaker 4: I'm you know, I have a whole mixed feelings about 56 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:14,240 Speaker 4: zoo stuff. But you know that's just me. Yeah, yeah, 57 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:15,760 Speaker 4: And so I get I get that as so far 58 00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:18,840 Speaker 4: as like they're roaming free and whatnot. But you know, 59 00:03:19,400 --> 00:03:21,840 Speaker 4: to what is it like you're on like a golf 60 00:03:21,960 --> 00:03:23,720 Speaker 4: cart type, right are you? 61 00:03:23,880 --> 00:03:26,120 Speaker 3: For the most part, this one and the one that 62 00:03:26,200 --> 00:03:29,280 Speaker 3: I grew up nearby, it was you would just drive 63 00:03:29,360 --> 00:03:32,720 Speaker 3: your fucking car through there. So it's like you're driving 64 00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:35,760 Speaker 3: your car and then wild animals are just free, like 65 00:03:35,880 --> 00:03:38,440 Speaker 3: if you want to, like avoid if you don't want 66 00:03:38,480 --> 00:03:40,320 Speaker 3: to hit a wart hog, like you have to avoid 67 00:03:40,440 --> 00:03:43,200 Speaker 3: hitting a wart hog because they are not behind any 68 00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:44,640 Speaker 3: type of barrier whatsoever. 69 00:03:45,480 --> 00:03:49,000 Speaker 2: I do not trust my car, that's right. 70 00:03:49,760 --> 00:03:50,920 Speaker 1: I don't choose my driving. 71 00:03:51,600 --> 00:03:53,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, none of it. My car is always on the 72 00:03:53,960 --> 00:03:57,160 Speaker 4: verge of like sometimes it I don't think it my 73 00:03:57,240 --> 00:03:59,360 Speaker 4: car is very old. I don't even think the speedometer 74 00:03:59,600 --> 00:04:02,280 Speaker 4: is exactly what it says, so I could be going 75 00:04:02,400 --> 00:04:04,440 Speaker 4: faster than I really think I am. You know what 76 00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:04,920 Speaker 4: I'm saying. 77 00:04:05,200 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 1: So it's always just rolling the dice going for a drive. 78 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:10,200 Speaker 4: I'm probably always at a sixty and I'm going thirty 79 00:04:10,440 --> 00:04:13,440 Speaker 4: and then you know a war hoog. There goes the 80 00:04:13,520 --> 00:04:16,800 Speaker 4: war hog that was just trying to cross the road. 81 00:04:17,120 --> 00:04:18,640 Speaker 1: Scotty, did you ever go to one of these as 82 00:04:18,640 --> 00:04:18,920 Speaker 1: a kid? 83 00:04:19,760 --> 00:04:22,480 Speaker 2: I never went to one of these. I knew you 84 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:25,840 Speaker 2: were going to do this story. I saw one, I 85 00:04:25,960 --> 00:04:29,120 Speaker 2: grew up next to one. Yeah, and I and also 86 00:04:29,200 --> 00:04:30,920 Speaker 2: a bunch of bananimals sent it in. Did you have 87 00:04:30,920 --> 00:04:32,919 Speaker 2: any names? Because I the first. 88 00:04:32,800 --> 00:04:36,359 Speaker 3: Actually the first bananimal who sent it in was beach Clouds. 89 00:04:36,400 --> 00:04:38,560 Speaker 3: But we've gotten like fifteen more people sent it in, 90 00:04:38,640 --> 00:04:39,200 Speaker 3: so they're right. 91 00:04:39,800 --> 00:04:43,680 Speaker 2: So I looked this up because I was like, baboons 92 00:04:43,720 --> 00:04:47,960 Speaker 2: are pretty gnarly. Baboons are like, uh, they're pretty strong 93 00:04:48,040 --> 00:04:50,000 Speaker 2: and ferocious, but I wanted to see how fast they 94 00:04:50,040 --> 00:04:54,160 Speaker 2: could run. So because if it has a knife, so 95 00:04:54,400 --> 00:04:57,400 Speaker 2: it's kind of Otsco's point, like maybe your car breaks 96 00:04:57,480 --> 00:04:59,560 Speaker 2: down and then they're cutting into your car, and I 97 00:04:59,720 --> 00:05:04,720 Speaker 2: was thinking, could I outrun a babboon? So Ussein Bolt, 98 00:05:04,839 --> 00:05:07,760 Speaker 2: the greatest sprinter of all time, can run twenty seven 99 00:05:07,839 --> 00:05:09,960 Speaker 2: and a half miles an hour. That's how fast he 100 00:05:10,279 --> 00:05:12,280 Speaker 2: was clocked at the when he at the Olympics, when 101 00:05:12,279 --> 00:05:15,119 Speaker 2: he broke the record. A babboon can run thirty miles 102 00:05:15,120 --> 00:05:18,880 Speaker 2: an hour. Wow, so slow it down a little bit 103 00:05:18,880 --> 00:05:20,560 Speaker 2: because that has a knife in one of its paws. 104 00:05:20,640 --> 00:05:24,000 Speaker 2: But I'm thinking, I think it can track you down. 105 00:05:24,120 --> 00:05:26,840 Speaker 2: And they have eight times the arm strength of a 106 00:05:27,160 --> 00:05:31,440 Speaker 2: human of a man, so he could probably say. 107 00:05:31,640 --> 00:05:34,400 Speaker 3: I was thinking he might have a tough time holding 108 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:36,920 Speaker 3: a chainsaw, but oh no, he can run with a 109 00:05:37,040 --> 00:05:39,239 Speaker 3: chainsaw over his head thirty miles. 110 00:05:40,279 --> 00:05:43,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the visual I was going for. 111 00:05:45,200 --> 00:05:48,240 Speaker 4: Oh my god, wow that Thanks for doing that math, 112 00:05:48,279 --> 00:05:51,400 Speaker 4: because now I really I really can see it. Who's 113 00:05:51,480 --> 00:05:55,080 Speaker 4: giving them these tools just for fun? Look? What do 114 00:05:55,160 --> 00:06:00,160 Speaker 4: you remember remember in London when like there was a 115 00:06:00,320 --> 00:06:02,920 Speaker 4: there was an attack, right, there was a guy stabbing 116 00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:06,600 Speaker 4: people and then Londoners came together and just like one 117 00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:07,719 Speaker 4: took a nar whale. 118 00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:12,760 Speaker 2: Uh that's right, right? Like what is it called the horn? 119 00:06:12,920 --> 00:06:18,400 Speaker 4: Yeahhrn Like because so those motherfuckers. You know, just in England. 120 00:06:18,440 --> 00:06:21,560 Speaker 4: They're they're crazy, they're ready to they're ready to fight. 121 00:06:21,760 --> 00:06:25,280 Speaker 4: You know, next time, I'm proposing. I'm proposing next time 122 00:06:25,279 --> 00:06:28,240 Speaker 4: because I didn't know baboons ran so fast and the 123 00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:31,480 Speaker 4: arm strength they have. Next time, there's like a terrorist attack, right, 124 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:35,600 Speaker 4: and some guys stabbing people in the streets, Send these 125 00:06:35,920 --> 00:06:36,960 Speaker 4: Send these baboons. 126 00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:38,760 Speaker 2: The baboons arm them. 127 00:06:38,880 --> 00:06:41,760 Speaker 3: Why doesn't m I six have an elite band of 128 00:06:41,839 --> 00:06:46,120 Speaker 3: baboons armed mostly with chainsaws and other kind of like 129 00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:49,520 Speaker 3: difficult to hoist weapons, you know what I mean, Yes, 130 00:06:50,360 --> 00:06:52,440 Speaker 3: just like really heavy meat cleavers. 131 00:06:53,200 --> 00:06:56,200 Speaker 4: Right, and again, I would like to say that, you know, 132 00:06:57,080 --> 00:07:01,239 Speaker 4: I'm usually against violence, I'm and I'm not for violence, 133 00:07:01,320 --> 00:07:03,280 Speaker 4: but if I had to put two and two together 134 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:06,520 Speaker 4: to I'm about solutions. If we had to get the 135 00:07:06,600 --> 00:07:11,600 Speaker 4: bad guy and these baboons already have screwdrivers and shit, yeah, 136 00:07:11,920 --> 00:07:12,440 Speaker 4: go for it. 137 00:07:12,840 --> 00:07:17,280 Speaker 3: This honestly terrifies me because of my intimate knowledge of so. 138 00:07:17,320 --> 00:07:20,240 Speaker 3: I grew up in New Jersey and right down the 139 00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:23,000 Speaker 3: road for me was a place called Great Adventure. Great 140 00:07:23,040 --> 00:07:25,840 Speaker 3: Adventure six Flags Theme Park, and they had what was 141 00:07:25,920 --> 00:07:28,520 Speaker 3: called the Great Adventure Drive through safari, which is, you know, 142 00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:32,720 Speaker 3: you just drive your car through. And it was such 143 00:07:33,040 --> 00:07:36,480 Speaker 3: a bad idea, not only for the animals, but for 144 00:07:36,720 --> 00:07:40,960 Speaker 3: the human beings as well that I remember once I 145 00:07:41,080 --> 00:07:42,960 Speaker 3: was I was ten years old. I didn't know any better. 146 00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:45,120 Speaker 3: I was eating an apple or just driving through. I 147 00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:47,800 Speaker 3: rolled the window down, not thinking anything of it, and 148 00:07:47,960 --> 00:07:51,400 Speaker 3: just threw the apple out the window, and out of nowhere, 149 00:07:52,320 --> 00:07:57,880 Speaker 3: a ostrich just ran in swallowed the apple hole, and 150 00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:02,440 Speaker 3: then we watched an apple traveled down this ostrich's neck 151 00:08:03,160 --> 00:08:07,480 Speaker 3: then just start like doing a pigeon dance thing that 152 00:08:07,800 --> 00:08:09,880 Speaker 3: see it, Like, I don't know what happened. I'm assuming 153 00:08:10,160 --> 00:08:12,720 Speaker 3: pigeons know how to eat apples, right, I'm assuming I 154 00:08:12,760 --> 00:08:15,400 Speaker 3: mean not pigeons, I'm assuming that ostriches know how to 155 00:08:15,480 --> 00:08:16,200 Speaker 3: eat apples. 156 00:08:16,280 --> 00:08:20,680 Speaker 2: Right. I don't know. I wouldn't assume that. Yeah, I 157 00:08:20,800 --> 00:08:24,720 Speaker 2: can't envision it whatsoever. But that's very disturbing for a 158 00:08:24,800 --> 00:08:25,400 Speaker 2: child to see. 159 00:08:25,400 --> 00:08:26,400 Speaker 1: It's very observing. 160 00:08:26,480 --> 00:08:28,360 Speaker 3: And then my mom just drove away, like I have 161 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:32,080 Speaker 3: no idea if I killed an ostrich that day as 162 00:08:32,160 --> 00:08:34,679 Speaker 3: a ten year old boy, like they were scarring, and 163 00:08:34,720 --> 00:08:36,760 Speaker 3: the baboons were even worse. Like the baboons would just 164 00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:39,640 Speaker 3: crawl on top of your car and dismantle your car. Yes, 165 00:08:40,640 --> 00:08:43,079 Speaker 3: and so now the fact that they to have a 166 00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:46,839 Speaker 3: chainsaw is now absolutely terrifying. I love it, but I 167 00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:52,040 Speaker 3: say shut them down, freem free them. 168 00:08:52,320 --> 00:08:54,280 Speaker 4: And you know because like, well, I don't know what 169 00:08:54,440 --> 00:08:56,520 Speaker 4: kind of apple you were eating, Kurt. You know, the 170 00:08:56,960 --> 00:09:01,280 Speaker 4: the apple's size is different and some have a lot 171 00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:04,079 Speaker 4: of wax on it that an ostrich might not be 172 00:09:04,280 --> 00:09:08,160 Speaker 4: used to ingesting, you know, And so you know, that's 173 00:09:08,240 --> 00:09:11,719 Speaker 4: that's that was my gonna be my first question. My 174 00:09:11,840 --> 00:09:15,400 Speaker 4: other thought is very interesting that Scotty likes this. When 175 00:09:15,440 --> 00:09:20,920 Speaker 4: you said who the writer was of this Yahoo News piece, yeah, 176 00:09:21,000 --> 00:09:22,360 Speaker 4: you know you know her work? 177 00:09:23,040 --> 00:09:27,600 Speaker 2: Oh, usually guessing it was Ellen Manning. I think he said, 178 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:31,240 Speaker 2: oh my god, it is Ellen. I love her. 179 00:09:32,760 --> 00:09:34,840 Speaker 1: Still trap it's amazing. 180 00:09:35,320 --> 00:09:37,800 Speaker 4: Does Ellen cover a lot of animal news? 181 00:09:38,160 --> 00:09:40,360 Speaker 3: No, it's a it is a running joke with Scotty 182 00:09:40,440 --> 00:09:41,800 Speaker 3: to say that he loves each writer. 183 00:09:42,600 --> 00:09:45,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, they're all doing the Lord's work. I love everybody 184 00:09:45,679 --> 00:09:46,840 Speaker 2: out there sending us news. 185 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:47,079 Speaker 4: Yeah. 186 00:09:47,080 --> 00:09:49,320 Speaker 2: I have no idea who that person is. I'm assuming 187 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 2: it's a woman. But great work, Ellen, Uh, that's top 188 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:55,599 Speaker 2: notch Yahoo News. 189 00:09:55,679 --> 00:09:58,160 Speaker 4: Keeping Yahoo News Alive. That's what she's doing. 190 00:09:58,679 --> 00:09:58,920 Speaker 2: Fine. 191 00:09:59,000 --> 00:10:02,160 Speaker 3: Uh and or are you missing not doing stand up 192 00:10:02,240 --> 00:10:05,280 Speaker 3: right now? Or are you liking not doing stand up 193 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:05,640 Speaker 3: right now? 194 00:10:06,040 --> 00:10:08,199 Speaker 4: I miss it. I've been doing a lot of zoom 195 00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:11,559 Speaker 4: shows actually, and I I've started to like them. 196 00:10:11,679 --> 00:10:14,760 Speaker 1: And it's oh, yeah, I don't know. It's oh nice, 197 00:10:14,800 --> 00:10:16,080 Speaker 1: you have to come to hot Tub. 198 00:10:16,760 --> 00:10:18,560 Speaker 4: I did. I did do hot Tub? 199 00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:21,240 Speaker 1: You were I wasn't there. Oh last week? 200 00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,040 Speaker 4: No, another time, you weren't there. 201 00:10:24,640 --> 00:10:28,000 Speaker 2: Curty guy, he's always these days the hardest guy to 202 00:10:28,080 --> 00:10:29,200 Speaker 2: find in the pandemic. 203 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,880 Speaker 4: It was it was somebody's birthday. So it was a 204 00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:36,520 Speaker 4: good wife's birth Oh that's right, that's right. Yeah, and 205 00:10:36,800 --> 00:10:40,079 Speaker 4: so so yeah, no, And I have come to like 206 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:43,800 Speaker 4: doing zoom comedy shows, which is scary to say out loud. 207 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:44,679 Speaker 1: Yeah. 208 00:10:45,640 --> 00:10:48,079 Speaker 4: That means I have to snap out of it, you know, 209 00:10:48,200 --> 00:10:50,520 Speaker 4: because that means if I get so used to doing 210 00:10:50,760 --> 00:10:53,439 Speaker 4: shows like this staring into a laptop, what am I 211 00:10:53,480 --> 00:10:55,960 Speaker 4: going to do when we finally open up and see 212 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:56,800 Speaker 4: the sunlight again? 213 00:10:57,000 --> 00:10:58,880 Speaker 3: Oh no, I mean it is so weird to just 214 00:10:59,000 --> 00:11:02,480 Speaker 3: stare into that little that little hole on top of you, 215 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:05,760 Speaker 3: on top of your computer and just just give your 216 00:11:05,840 --> 00:11:06,839 Speaker 3: comedy to the void. 217 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:10,800 Speaker 4: What I'm saying is, I've come to really like doing that, 218 00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:14,480 Speaker 4: and so I'm scared of forgetting how to do actual 219 00:11:14,720 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 4: standing on a stage in front of humans, is what 220 00:11:17,559 --> 00:11:19,720 Speaker 4: I'm saying. I'm gonna have a hard time transitioning back 221 00:11:19,800 --> 00:11:20,000 Speaker 4: to that. 222 00:11:20,679 --> 00:11:23,920 Speaker 2: I'm more than I'm totally happy standing directly in front 223 00:11:23,920 --> 00:11:26,000 Speaker 2: of stage for you and holding your lap up towards 224 00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:28,160 Speaker 2: your face while you do stand up for the first time. 225 00:11:28,200 --> 00:11:30,720 Speaker 2: I'll come, Scottie. I will. 226 00:11:31,200 --> 00:11:32,360 Speaker 4: That's a bold statement. 227 00:11:33,000 --> 00:11:35,280 Speaker 2: I'll wear all black. I'll do ten shows for you. 228 00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:37,520 Speaker 2: I'll wear all blacks of the audience doesn't even see me. 229 00:11:37,840 --> 00:11:40,800 Speaker 3: You play right, put the giant headphones on so that 230 00:11:40,880 --> 00:11:43,520 Speaker 3: you block out the audience's laughter as well, so it's 231 00:11:43,559 --> 00:11:44,160 Speaker 3: silent for you. 232 00:11:44,720 --> 00:11:47,480 Speaker 4: That's right, That's right. That's this is a bold promise. 233 00:11:47,559 --> 00:11:49,599 Speaker 4: I appreciate it so much. No, I'm gonna have to 234 00:11:49,720 --> 00:11:50,599 Speaker 4: transition like that. 235 00:11:50,800 --> 00:11:51,040 Speaker 2: I have. 236 00:11:51,480 --> 00:11:54,160 Speaker 4: I definitely have said I need a laptop in front 237 00:11:54,200 --> 00:11:55,920 Speaker 4: of me for the first live show. 238 00:11:57,840 --> 00:11:58,959 Speaker 2: Thank you help me? 239 00:12:00,120 --> 00:12:02,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, Scott, to give me another one. 240 00:12:02,400 --> 00:12:05,199 Speaker 2: I got a banana story for you too. Here we go. 241 00:12:05,800 --> 00:12:09,240 Speaker 2: This is from CNN, written by Scotty Andrew, just Andrew, 242 00:12:09,440 --> 00:12:12,600 Speaker 2: not plural. Great guy, and it was sent in by 243 00:12:13,000 --> 00:12:16,920 Speaker 2: Meg Manners, the greatest person in the history of the world. 244 00:12:17,000 --> 00:12:20,480 Speaker 2: Thank you Meg. They met on a dating app, then 245 00:12:20,559 --> 00:12:22,640 Speaker 2: he robbed a bank on their first date and forced 246 00:12:22,640 --> 00:12:27,800 Speaker 2: her to be a getaway driver. Okay, so you know, 247 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:32,080 Speaker 2: start loading up your worst first date stories. But her 248 00:12:32,200 --> 00:12:36,000 Speaker 2: worst first date began like this. It all started, the 249 00:12:36,040 --> 00:12:39,160 Speaker 2: woman told police when she picked up Castillo, that's the 250 00:12:39,960 --> 00:12:43,040 Speaker 2: that's the criminal's name, I guess, alleged from his parents' 251 00:12:43,080 --> 00:12:47,960 Speaker 2: home in Rhode Island and drove. Yeah, that's a great start. Well, actually, 252 00:12:48,040 --> 00:12:50,560 Speaker 2: who knows. It's a pandemic. Everybody's moving home. Who knows? 253 00:12:52,440 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 2: So then she drove them thirty minutes north to Attleborough, Massachusetts. 254 00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,520 Speaker 2: She said he drank wine in the passenger seat of 255 00:12:59,559 --> 00:13:03,400 Speaker 2: her niece on Maxima. Good start to a first date. 256 00:13:03,760 --> 00:13:06,160 Speaker 2: The two had never met in person before that fateful day, 257 00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:08,959 Speaker 2: so why would she think anything was wrong? When he 258 00:13:09,040 --> 00:13:11,400 Speaker 2: asked her to pull over as they approached a bank, 259 00:13:11,960 --> 00:13:13,600 Speaker 2: he got out of the car and left her there 260 00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:16,200 Speaker 2: alone for a few minutes. Then suddenly he came running back, 261 00:13:16,280 --> 00:13:19,040 Speaker 2: sweating with sunglasses, a hat and a gun. One thousand 262 00:13:19,080 --> 00:13:25,480 Speaker 2: dollars cash in hand and yelled fucking go. She panicked 263 00:13:25,520 --> 00:13:28,240 Speaker 2: and did what she was told. So Castillo walks into 264 00:13:28,240 --> 00:13:30,800 Speaker 2: the Bristol County Savings Bank and North Attleborough shows the 265 00:13:30,840 --> 00:13:33,079 Speaker 2: gun and demands a thousand dollars, saying he needed it 266 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:36,280 Speaker 2: badly because he was quote really hurting. The teller handed 267 00:13:36,360 --> 00:13:38,360 Speaker 2: him the money. He ran back outside to his date's 268 00:13:38,400 --> 00:13:39,959 Speaker 2: Maxima in ordered a step on it. 269 00:13:40,720 --> 00:13:41,840 Speaker 1: So wait, he only stole. 270 00:13:41,960 --> 00:13:47,080 Speaker 3: He's specifically like, I need a thousand, that's all, yes, 271 00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:50,400 Speaker 3: so genteel number to steal. 272 00:13:51,040 --> 00:13:54,640 Speaker 2: He's a gentleman, he's you know, he probably opened the 273 00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:57,360 Speaker 2: door for her when well she picked him up. Never mind, Uh, 274 00:13:57,760 --> 00:14:02,079 Speaker 2: not a great first date. So this accidental accomplice obeyed. 275 00:14:02,520 --> 00:14:06,720 Speaker 2: But once she spotted flashing sirens from the North Attleborough police, 276 00:14:07,120 --> 00:14:09,520 Speaker 2: she immediately pulled over and walked away from her car. 277 00:14:09,800 --> 00:14:12,839 Speaker 2: Here comes a nice little detail. Castillo stayed inside and 278 00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:17,520 Speaker 2: ducked from police. You know, you know that old bit, 279 00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:22,520 Speaker 2: that old Merry Melodies bit. He was subuted and handcuffed, 280 00:14:22,560 --> 00:14:25,080 Speaker 2: and they found a forty four calver handgun, an antique 281 00:14:25,240 --> 00:14:29,240 Speaker 2: handgun belonging to Castillo's stepfather, had sunglasses that matched the description. 282 00:14:30,760 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 2: He was sentenced to five years incarceration. They found him guilty, 283 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:40,120 Speaker 2: but the date got off without charge, and Scotty says 284 00:14:40,600 --> 00:14:45,080 Speaker 2: the real Scotty Scotty Andrew probably with a healthy skepticism 285 00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:51,360 Speaker 2: towards online dating. So there you go, that last line. 286 00:14:51,400 --> 00:14:53,760 Speaker 4: He really did it. Scotty brought it home. 287 00:14:54,800 --> 00:14:57,040 Speaker 1: He gave us a button to smile away with. 288 00:14:57,640 --> 00:15:02,200 Speaker 4: I almost I almost forgot about the date. Yeah, and 289 00:15:02,320 --> 00:15:05,160 Speaker 4: then he was like, by the way, the reason why 290 00:15:05,240 --> 00:15:08,960 Speaker 4: I started this thing was, remember there was a date. 291 00:15:09,120 --> 00:15:13,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, you guys on bad first dates, bad first dates 292 00:15:13,040 --> 00:15:13,400 Speaker 2: from hell. 293 00:15:14,600 --> 00:15:15,280 Speaker 4: What did you say? 294 00:15:15,680 --> 00:15:18,440 Speaker 2: Have you ever been on a bad first date from hell? 295 00:15:18,880 --> 00:15:21,480 Speaker 4: Oh? No, nothing like that, nothing like that. 296 00:15:21,880 --> 00:15:22,920 Speaker 2: No, and you no. 297 00:15:23,080 --> 00:15:26,800 Speaker 4: My heart goes out to him. Actually my first thought was, 298 00:15:27,160 --> 00:15:32,320 Speaker 4: I mean, that's that's all you know? You shit, he's American. 299 00:15:33,640 --> 00:15:36,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, they were all in Yeah, they were in 300 00:15:36,040 --> 00:15:38,960 Speaker 2: Rhode Island and Massachusetts, so they even crossed federal or 301 00:15:39,040 --> 00:15:41,240 Speaker 2: state lines, which I think it's it was a great 302 00:15:41,360 --> 00:15:44,520 Speaker 2: first date. Memorable, you can say it was memorable for sure. 303 00:15:44,880 --> 00:15:47,560 Speaker 3: I just wonder at what point, like if he was 304 00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:50,120 Speaker 3: like riding in the car just being like like he 305 00:15:50,200 --> 00:15:53,120 Speaker 3: had no plan on robbing a bank. But he's just like, 306 00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:57,760 Speaker 3: you know, I always hear women love it when you're spontaneous. 307 00:15:58,440 --> 00:16:02,480 Speaker 3: It's always like, what if I just throw a wrench 308 00:16:02,560 --> 00:16:05,240 Speaker 3: in this, Let's take a left turn here, and. 309 00:16:05,320 --> 00:16:07,040 Speaker 1: I'll rob this fucking back. 310 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:13,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, but she thinks, yeah, it's possible. My thing is 311 00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:15,520 Speaker 4: every time I even watch like a show like The 312 00:16:15,600 --> 00:16:19,120 Speaker 4: Big Flower Fight or something, it's a British competition show, 313 00:16:19,360 --> 00:16:22,240 Speaker 4: I always find myself rooting for the Americans because I 314 00:16:22,320 --> 00:16:25,120 Speaker 4: know there's a possibility they might not have healthcare, you 315 00:16:25,200 --> 00:16:28,560 Speaker 4: know what I'm saying, you know, And it's not I 316 00:16:28,680 --> 00:16:30,520 Speaker 4: always end up doing it because I'm just like, I 317 00:16:30,640 --> 00:16:33,240 Speaker 4: think they might not have healthcare. They maybe didn't get 318 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:35,760 Speaker 4: their stimulus check. So I'm just like, you know, this 319 00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:38,920 Speaker 4: kid's in Rhode Island. He can't help it, you know 320 00:16:38,960 --> 00:16:41,240 Speaker 4: what I'm saying, one thousand dollars. I was like, he 321 00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:44,680 Speaker 4: probably didn't get a stimulus chick, That's that's what I thought. Yeah, 322 00:16:45,240 --> 00:16:47,760 Speaker 4: But because that's you know, and he was like keep 323 00:16:47,800 --> 00:16:49,720 Speaker 4: the two hundred, you know. Yeah. 324 00:16:50,200 --> 00:16:52,640 Speaker 3: I wonder if there's like a reduced five years. I mean, 325 00:16:52,720 --> 00:16:54,760 Speaker 3: like if he had just asked for all the money, 326 00:16:55,480 --> 00:16:59,160 Speaker 3: would his like jail time been more than him, just 327 00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:01,960 Speaker 3: as thousand dollars or is in his mind. 328 00:17:02,000 --> 00:17:02,920 Speaker 1: He's like thousand dollars. 329 00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:06,399 Speaker 3: It keeps him below the radar, right, But he's got 330 00:17:06,440 --> 00:17:08,680 Speaker 3: a thousand bucks in their till or whatever. 331 00:17:09,400 --> 00:17:11,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, and he's got a If he hadn't pulled a gun, 332 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:12,920 Speaker 2: it would have been way less because if it's not 333 00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:15,200 Speaker 2: arm robbery, it's way different. But of course he had 334 00:17:15,240 --> 00:17:18,560 Speaker 2: his stepfather's antique forty four. You know you're always carrying 335 00:17:18,560 --> 00:17:23,280 Speaker 2: around your stepfather's pistol. On a first date, I went 336 00:17:23,640 --> 00:17:26,240 Speaker 2: on a MySpace date when I was like twenty five. 337 00:17:26,520 --> 00:17:28,520 Speaker 2: Somebody I think he used to be able to do 338 00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:31,280 Speaker 2: sort of proximity on that, like are you within fifteen 339 00:17:31,359 --> 00:17:35,120 Speaker 2: miles or within twenty miles or something? And I started 340 00:17:35,400 --> 00:17:39,320 Speaker 2: chatting with this woman. She seemed totally cool, and she 341 00:17:39,440 --> 00:17:41,119 Speaker 2: was like, well, let's meet for a date. But I 342 00:17:41,200 --> 00:17:43,359 Speaker 2: had never been on any sort of online date before, 343 00:17:43,440 --> 00:17:46,440 Speaker 2: so I planned it to be two blocks from where 344 00:17:46,440 --> 00:17:47,960 Speaker 2: I knew a group of my friends were going to be. 345 00:17:48,080 --> 00:17:49,960 Speaker 2: Sofa was a terrible date. I could be like, nice 346 00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:52,040 Speaker 2: to meet you, and go over to this bar called 347 00:17:52,040 --> 00:17:55,520 Speaker 2: the Still in Manhattan, and get out of there. So 348 00:17:56,200 --> 00:17:59,000 Speaker 2: I walk in and was at this noodle shop and 349 00:17:59,080 --> 00:18:01,920 Speaker 2: as soon as I and I'm like hi, I'm like 350 00:18:01,960 --> 00:18:04,560 Speaker 2: I'm Scottie and I sit down and she goes, oh 351 00:18:04,680 --> 00:18:06,840 Speaker 2: my god. Before the day can even start, I have 352 00:18:06,960 --> 00:18:09,040 Speaker 2: to tell you that last night I fucked the vice 353 00:18:09,119 --> 00:18:11,400 Speaker 2: president of Sci Fi Channel because he kind of looks 354 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:17,000 Speaker 2: like Robert Downey Junior. For if I'm lying, I'm dying. 355 00:18:17,160 --> 00:18:20,040 Speaker 2: That's the first thing she says to me besides hello. 356 00:18:21,160 --> 00:18:24,200 Speaker 2: So instantly I'm like I want to know more. But 357 00:18:24,359 --> 00:18:26,280 Speaker 2: also I'm like, okay, this is not going to be 358 00:18:26,840 --> 00:18:30,320 Speaker 2: my this is not my special person. So the day 359 00:18:30,400 --> 00:18:33,200 Speaker 2: goes even more haywire and screwy, and we kind of 360 00:18:33,280 --> 00:18:36,280 Speaker 2: step outside. I stayed for the whole dinner, of course, 361 00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:39,399 Speaker 2: and we step outside and then I'm like, it was 362 00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:41,159 Speaker 2: so nice to meet you. I actually have to go 363 00:18:41,440 --> 00:18:43,400 Speaker 2: and run and meet some friends at like a later meeting, 364 00:18:43,800 --> 00:18:46,000 Speaker 2: but this was really fun. And she goes, oh, I'll come, 365 00:18:46,880 --> 00:18:51,440 Speaker 2: and I was like what, and I was like, well, 366 00:18:51,760 --> 00:18:54,160 Speaker 2: it's kind of like it's like a weekly group thing 367 00:18:54,280 --> 00:18:56,399 Speaker 2: and whatever. She's like, that sounds awesome. So I'm like, 368 00:18:56,480 --> 00:18:58,159 Speaker 2: here we go. So I text my friends. I'm like, 369 00:18:58,280 --> 00:19:01,560 Speaker 2: I'm coming, like basically like heads up. So we go 370 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:04,240 Speaker 2: in this bar and she and most of my friends 371 00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:08,800 Speaker 2: there were gay men, and she instantly starts calling all 372 00:19:08,800 --> 00:19:11,560 Speaker 2: of them girl like oh girl, oh you look so pretty, 373 00:19:11,560 --> 00:19:14,760 Speaker 2: girl like being so patronizing and like, oh it was, 374 00:19:15,080 --> 00:19:17,560 Speaker 2: And they're being really nice because they know I'm on 375 00:19:17,640 --> 00:19:20,760 Speaker 2: this date with this person. So she goes downstairs the 376 00:19:21,040 --> 00:19:23,639 Speaker 2: bar at that bathroom is downstairs, and they all and 377 00:19:23,720 --> 00:19:25,640 Speaker 2: they go, what the hell is this. I'm like, I'm 378 00:19:25,680 --> 00:19:27,600 Speaker 2: trying to get out of this date. I've been trying 379 00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:29,800 Speaker 2: three times to get out of this date. So they 380 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:32,879 Speaker 2: were like, where does she live? I'm like, I don't know. 381 00:19:33,920 --> 00:19:36,520 Speaker 2: And my one friend Fred, who listened to the podcast. Fred, 382 00:19:36,600 --> 00:19:39,440 Speaker 2: you probably are remembering the story. We get in a 383 00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:43,920 Speaker 2: taxi and we're gonna pretend because Fred lived in Bushwick. 384 00:19:44,000 --> 00:19:46,440 Speaker 2: I lived in Brooklyn also, and I was like, let's 385 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:49,080 Speaker 2: just say we're leaving, and then she'll leave and we'll 386 00:19:49,160 --> 00:19:51,560 Speaker 2: just take the cab around the block and then come 387 00:19:51,680 --> 00:19:53,600 Speaker 2: right back to the bar. That's how bad this got 388 00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:55,879 Speaker 2: because she just wouldn't take the hint. And I, you know, 389 00:19:55,920 --> 00:19:57,520 Speaker 2: I was twenty five, so I should have just said 390 00:19:58,560 --> 00:20:01,359 Speaker 2: I'm sorry, can you please leave? It's not gonna work out. 391 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,760 Speaker 1: But no, at twenty five, that seems like impossible to say. 392 00:20:05,320 --> 00:20:08,040 Speaker 2: Yeah. And I was just and I'm also like a 393 00:20:08,080 --> 00:20:10,520 Speaker 2: pretty nice person, and I was curious up until a 394 00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:14,320 Speaker 2: point and then when she started, yeah, anyways, So I'm like, 395 00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:16,639 Speaker 2: I'm Fred and I are gonna split a cab. It 396 00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:18,360 Speaker 2: was so nice to meet you. She was like, I'll 397 00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:22,800 Speaker 2: go and I was like, oh no, And I was like, well, 398 00:20:23,080 --> 00:20:25,680 Speaker 2: we're I'm going to go home, so we'll drop you off. 399 00:20:25,880 --> 00:20:28,680 Speaker 2: And Fred's looking at me like Jesus Christ. So she 400 00:20:28,840 --> 00:20:31,160 Speaker 2: gets in the cab. We're three abreasts or we're three 401 00:20:31,200 --> 00:20:35,240 Speaker 2: across in the back seat, and we're on seventeenth Street 402 00:20:35,240 --> 00:20:38,240 Speaker 2: and I think first Avenue, maybe third Avenue, And so 403 00:20:38,320 --> 00:20:39,600 Speaker 2: we get and I go, so, where do you live? 404 00:20:40,080 --> 00:20:43,159 Speaker 2: And she's like oh, to the driver rudely to the cavey, 405 00:20:43,240 --> 00:20:46,760 Speaker 2: she goes, h, I live on fourteenth and first she 406 00:20:46,880 --> 00:20:50,960 Speaker 2: lived two blocks away, So we go two blocks drop 407 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,600 Speaker 2: her out. Fred jumps out of the car to let 408 00:20:52,600 --> 00:20:54,280 Speaker 2: her out. She turns and she goes, I had the 409 00:20:54,359 --> 00:20:58,240 Speaker 2: most wonderful time and kisses me so hard, like open mouth, 410 00:21:00,160 --> 00:21:02,159 Speaker 2: in the back of the cab and I was like, okay. 411 00:21:02,560 --> 00:21:04,600 Speaker 2: I was like, nice to meet you. She gets out, 412 00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:06,639 Speaker 2: Fred gets back in. He goes, we're going back to 413 00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:12,240 Speaker 2: the bar. So the cab whips around, goes the fair 414 00:21:12,440 --> 00:21:14,480 Speaker 2: was three dollars and eighty cents. That's how much the 415 00:21:14,520 --> 00:21:16,480 Speaker 2: cab fair was. So we just do a loop around 416 00:21:16,520 --> 00:21:18,159 Speaker 2: the block to get rid of her. We're all back there. 417 00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:21,640 Speaker 2: Everybody's like celebrating that I'm back without her. And then 418 00:21:22,280 --> 00:21:24,719 Speaker 2: like twenty minutes later, I get a text from her 419 00:21:24,840 --> 00:21:26,680 Speaker 2: and I'm so relieved and I'm never going to go 420 00:21:26,720 --> 00:21:29,800 Speaker 2: on another day with this person. And it says, Hi, 421 00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:33,400 Speaker 2: I had an amazing time. Let's not walk on eggshells. 422 00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:35,720 Speaker 2: Do you want to be my boyfriend or not? No? 423 00:21:36,280 --> 00:21:41,800 Speaker 2: What sure? And I said, I think we're on like 424 00:21:41,920 --> 00:21:44,399 Speaker 2: the I think, I said, we're on a different wavelength 425 00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:47,320 Speaker 2: and I'm not ready for that kind of commitment right now. 426 00:21:47,440 --> 00:21:50,119 Speaker 2: And she goes, ugh, fine, and then blocks me on 427 00:21:50,200 --> 00:21:52,000 Speaker 2: my space and I never heard from her again. 428 00:21:53,760 --> 00:21:57,359 Speaker 4: A tank that was fast, like someone told her the 429 00:21:57,440 --> 00:21:59,320 Speaker 4: next day was going to be the last day on Earth, 430 00:21:59,400 --> 00:21:59,639 Speaker 4: you know. 431 00:22:00,280 --> 00:22:01,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, that's right. 432 00:22:02,040 --> 00:22:02,960 Speaker 4: And it. 433 00:22:06,560 --> 00:22:10,680 Speaker 2: Was so intense. Yeah, Fred is a bananimal. I'm sure 434 00:22:10,680 --> 00:22:14,040 Speaker 2: he remembers the story. It was absolutely banana. It was crazy. 435 00:22:14,400 --> 00:22:15,640 Speaker 1: It's a great opening line. 436 00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:19,520 Speaker 3: I should yeah because fuck the president of the Sci 437 00:22:19,600 --> 00:22:22,080 Speaker 3: Fi Network because he looked like Robert Downey Jr. 438 00:22:22,400 --> 00:22:30,240 Speaker 2: Yeah, vice president because he kind of like it's also yeah, 439 00:22:30,359 --> 00:22:32,840 Speaker 2: and also Robert Downey Jr. Was an iron man in 440 00:22:32,960 --> 00:22:36,760 Speaker 2: two thoy sixteen was like still when he was a 441 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:39,440 Speaker 2: little bit of like a junkie and like not like 442 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,840 Speaker 2: she just saw his mugshots. This was Gawker era, not 443 00:22:43,160 --> 00:22:44,120 Speaker 2: Tony Stark era. 444 00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:47,200 Speaker 4: Oh that's so funny that. 445 00:22:47,440 --> 00:22:50,480 Speaker 1: Let us take a little break bananas. 446 00:23:01,520 --> 00:23:02,119 Speaker 4: Let me check. 447 00:23:09,200 --> 00:23:21,720 Speaker 1: Shot at guys. Welllcome back everybody. 448 00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:25,600 Speaker 3: Thank you to everybody who is over on the Instagram 449 00:23:25,720 --> 00:23:29,720 Speaker 3: page the Bananas podcast sending us stories. 450 00:23:30,480 --> 00:23:32,520 Speaker 1: We really really hyper appreciate it. 451 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:35,680 Speaker 3: And uh, and I realized that I was talking with 452 00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:38,200 Speaker 3: thoughts go about hot Tub, and I've never talked about 453 00:23:38,200 --> 00:23:41,560 Speaker 3: hot Tub on the show before. Hot Tub is a 454 00:23:42,359 --> 00:23:45,359 Speaker 3: comedy show that I've been hosting with Kristin Schaal for 455 00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:48,840 Speaker 3: fifteen years now, and since the pandemic started, we have 456 00:23:48,960 --> 00:23:52,760 Speaker 3: been doing it every Monday night, eight pm Pacific time. 457 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:55,520 Speaker 1: It's at holdthephone dot TV. 458 00:23:56,000 --> 00:23:58,800 Speaker 3: If you come, you can watch a virtual comedy show 459 00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:04,680 Speaker 3: where your laughter is you chatting with with your little fingers, 460 00:24:05,119 --> 00:24:08,480 Speaker 3: putting on smiley faces and shit, yes, sir, but we 461 00:24:08,600 --> 00:24:12,040 Speaker 3: do it every Monday. We're taking August off f YI, 462 00:24:12,440 --> 00:24:15,600 Speaker 3: but we'll be back September fourteenth. But yeah, I just 463 00:24:15,640 --> 00:24:17,960 Speaker 3: realized I'd never plugged tatab on here. 464 00:24:19,040 --> 00:24:23,480 Speaker 4: There was so hot, so hot every Monday, go to it, 465 00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:26,399 Speaker 4: say we're supporting it. That's what well, that's what I 466 00:24:26,520 --> 00:24:27,960 Speaker 4: was just doing, thoughts. Go. 467 00:24:28,080 --> 00:24:30,480 Speaker 2: I was watching a bunch of your clips online and 468 00:24:30,720 --> 00:24:34,080 Speaker 2: I realized that you got a little viral infamy because 469 00:24:34,080 --> 00:24:35,960 Speaker 2: you were doing stand up during an earthquake. And you 470 00:24:36,160 --> 00:24:40,240 Speaker 2: kept going, Oh my god, how was that? Was that? Crazy? 471 00:24:41,320 --> 00:24:41,680 Speaker 2: That was? 472 00:24:42,520 --> 00:24:45,639 Speaker 4: You know at the moment, it's like everything that I 473 00:24:45,720 --> 00:24:48,960 Speaker 4: ever learned kicked in. You know, everything that i'd been 474 00:24:49,040 --> 00:24:54,119 Speaker 4: training for, right, whether whether it's whether it's you know, 475 00:24:54,280 --> 00:24:57,440 Speaker 4: my parents divorce, my mom's mental illness, you know what 476 00:24:57,520 --> 00:25:01,760 Speaker 4: I mean to literally like to even just doing stand 477 00:25:01,880 --> 00:25:05,600 Speaker 4: up right, doing stand up any any night is always 478 00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:08,640 Speaker 4: like anything can go and so and plus we live 479 00:25:08,720 --> 00:25:11,399 Speaker 4: in La so they were always talking about the big one, 480 00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:15,479 Speaker 4: the big earthquick big earthquakes. So yeah, I was like, oh, 481 00:25:15,560 --> 00:25:18,400 Speaker 4: I think everything just kicked in all of my instincts 482 00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:24,760 Speaker 4: that I've been training for as an Angelina comic. It 483 00:25:24,880 --> 00:25:28,040 Speaker 4: was I didn't know I would keep doing stand up, 484 00:25:28,200 --> 00:25:31,440 Speaker 4: you know, during it. I you know, I it's interesting 485 00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:34,400 Speaker 4: what people do in moments of tragedy. 486 00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:38,000 Speaker 1: It's a really really funny clip. You guys should watch it. 487 00:25:38,080 --> 00:25:40,840 Speaker 1: It's on YouTube, right, Yeah, it's on YouTube. 488 00:25:40,880 --> 00:25:41,760 Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah. 489 00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:45,800 Speaker 1: That was last fourth of July weekend. 490 00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 4: Right. It was because it was a double back to 491 00:25:49,960 --> 00:25:52,000 Speaker 4: back big earthquakes. 492 00:25:51,760 --> 00:25:54,639 Speaker 3: Yea, two days in a row and the good ones too, 493 00:25:55,320 --> 00:25:58,159 Speaker 3: and things just look like you can't really tell in 494 00:25:58,240 --> 00:26:00,159 Speaker 3: the video that it's happening, but like what was in 495 00:26:00,240 --> 00:26:01,120 Speaker 3: the club happening. 496 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:08,200 Speaker 4: Lights were swaying, and people's like glasses at their tables 497 00:26:08,320 --> 00:26:12,879 Speaker 4: at the comedy club, and like their plates their food. 498 00:26:13,680 --> 00:26:16,439 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, the chicken tenders are just set it right 499 00:26:16,480 --> 00:26:18,520 Speaker 2: off the table, jumping on the table. I would eat 500 00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:18,919 Speaker 2: it really. 501 00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:23,280 Speaker 4: Fast if yeah, just catch it in your mouth. Kids. 502 00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:25,000 Speaker 2: One item, this is one item, this is. 503 00:26:28,600 --> 00:26:29,119 Speaker 1: This counts. 504 00:26:29,920 --> 00:26:31,879 Speaker 2: That's so cool. I love you did that. Our friend 505 00:26:32,480 --> 00:26:34,159 Speaker 2: another guy curtain I used to work on show coup 506 00:26:34,160 --> 00:26:36,399 Speaker 2: money from Stanger and our buddy Jeff Di also was 507 00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:38,879 Speaker 2: doing a set when that happened, and he did the 508 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:40,680 Speaker 2: same thing where it's like he froze and then he 509 00:26:40,800 --> 00:26:42,840 Speaker 2: just like calmed everybody down and then just kind of 510 00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:44,879 Speaker 2: continued on doing stand up. 511 00:26:47,800 --> 00:26:50,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, in a way, that's like what we're trained to 512 00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:53,160 Speaker 4: do is like a deal with hecklers and then continue. 513 00:26:53,480 --> 00:26:57,359 Speaker 4: The adrenaline is always there anyway doing jokes, right, So, 514 00:26:58,160 --> 00:27:02,160 Speaker 4: but I mean at the club, well, I don't feel 515 00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:03,960 Speaker 4: bad because they've talked about it before, but at the 516 00:27:04,040 --> 00:27:06,040 Speaker 4: club at the time, I did look to the house 517 00:27:06,160 --> 00:27:08,239 Speaker 4: managers to see what to do, and I saw all 518 00:27:08,280 --> 00:27:10,520 Speaker 4: of them just look at me from the back of 519 00:27:10,560 --> 00:27:16,280 Speaker 4: the room and just run out because at one point 520 00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,520 Speaker 4: I got house manager, house manager, There's two hundred people 521 00:27:20,080 --> 00:27:22,920 Speaker 4: in front of me. I've never been a leader in 522 00:27:23,160 --> 00:27:25,800 Speaker 4: a situation like that before, two hundred people looking to 523 00:27:25,920 --> 00:27:29,719 Speaker 4: me for what to do. You know, I have the microphone, 524 00:27:29,760 --> 00:27:34,399 Speaker 4: I have the stage. I don't know me, I haven't 525 00:27:34,640 --> 00:27:37,320 Speaker 4: I don't know earthquake. So again, like I went to 526 00:27:37,520 --> 00:27:40,000 Speaker 4: art school, all I do is just jokes and think 527 00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:44,199 Speaker 4: about jokes. I don't know the first thing, and so. 528 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:49,000 Speaker 2: Here, let's pay for tunnels exactly. 529 00:27:49,600 --> 00:27:52,800 Speaker 4: Yeah, everyone get under a chair and tell stories, you. 530 00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:57,280 Speaker 1: Know, let's relive trauma underneath the table. 531 00:27:57,760 --> 00:28:01,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, totally totally. But anyway, I saw the house managers 532 00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:02,240 Speaker 4: run out, so yeah. 533 00:28:03,040 --> 00:28:06,840 Speaker 1: That's amazing. Are you guys ready for one more story? 534 00:28:08,600 --> 00:28:08,879 Speaker 2: Let's go? 535 00:28:09,280 --> 00:28:11,360 Speaker 1: Oh I think we could do three more. 536 00:28:13,280 --> 00:28:13,639 Speaker 4: Guys. 537 00:28:15,760 --> 00:28:22,280 Speaker 3: The plaque commemorating the Glasgow Sherbet explosion of nineteen oh 538 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:25,240 Speaker 3: six has Glaswegians doing a double take. 539 00:28:27,119 --> 00:28:29,359 Speaker 1: So this is from Glasgow. 540 00:28:28,920 --> 00:28:36,399 Speaker 3: Live, written by Kirsty Mackenzie, Scotti's best friend. 541 00:28:36,880 --> 00:28:41,560 Speaker 2: Oh, I read every letter she has ever typed. 542 00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:45,440 Speaker 3: And also just just I want everyone to if anyone 543 00:28:45,600 --> 00:28:48,640 Speaker 3: is listening to this that is familiar with Glasgow Live. 544 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:51,880 Speaker 1: It is the worst website ever. 545 00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:55,160 Speaker 2: There is. 546 00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:58,320 Speaker 3: There are so many ads and pop ups that I 547 00:28:58,440 --> 00:29:02,040 Speaker 3: am literally having to view the article through no shit. 548 00:29:01,920 --> 00:29:03,600 Speaker 1: Like I'm on a big computer. 549 00:29:03,960 --> 00:29:06,680 Speaker 5: I have a three and a half inch window that 550 00:29:06,840 --> 00:29:10,440 Speaker 5: I can see like four lines of four lines at 551 00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:12,640 Speaker 5: a time, and then there's another ad, and there's an 552 00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:14,320 Speaker 5: ad on the bottom, and then there's two ads on 553 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:16,120 Speaker 5: the sides, and then they have this weird ad bar 554 00:29:16,240 --> 00:29:16,920 Speaker 5: across the top. 555 00:29:17,160 --> 00:29:19,360 Speaker 1: This is terrible, Like fix your fucking website. 556 00:29:19,400 --> 00:29:22,480 Speaker 3: I understand print journalism is really having a tough time 557 00:29:22,560 --> 00:29:24,000 Speaker 3: right now, but this is not the way to do it, 558 00:29:24,040 --> 00:29:25,520 Speaker 3: because no one will go to your site, all right, 559 00:29:27,560 --> 00:29:30,440 Speaker 3: So somebody put up this is a sign that can 560 00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:35,680 Speaker 3: be found by the River Kelvin, and it is. There's 561 00:29:35,680 --> 00:29:39,400 Speaker 3: a picture of it. It looks beautiful. It is like 562 00:29:39,520 --> 00:29:43,120 Speaker 3: a real plaque. It looks like it's printed on brass 563 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:46,560 Speaker 3: or something like that. It's a fixed in what looks 564 00:29:46,640 --> 00:29:48,040 Speaker 3: like an actual real way. 565 00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:50,360 Speaker 1: And this is the article. 566 00:29:50,360 --> 00:29:53,680 Speaker 3: We're not exactly sure, We're not exactly short of interesting monuments. 567 00:29:54,120 --> 00:29:56,400 Speaker 3: If you've recently taken a stroll past the River Kelvin, 568 00:29:56,440 --> 00:29:58,400 Speaker 3: you may have come across a strange little sign. The 569 00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:01,080 Speaker 3: font is so perfect, the plaque so shiny, that it 570 00:30:01,200 --> 00:30:04,000 Speaker 3: really could be an official sign marking a heritage landmark. 571 00:30:04,240 --> 00:30:05,880 Speaker 3: Yet it seems to tell tale that no one has 572 00:30:05,920 --> 00:30:06,880 Speaker 3: ever heard of it. 573 00:30:07,000 --> 00:30:07,280 Speaker 1: Reads. 574 00:30:07,360 --> 00:30:11,280 Speaker 3: This plaque marks the site of the Glasgow Sherbert Municipal Works. 575 00:30:11,960 --> 00:30:14,160 Speaker 3: The sign goes on in great detail to share the 576 00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:16,720 Speaker 3: little known history of an explosion there in nineteen oh 577 00:30:16,800 --> 00:30:19,880 Speaker 3: six that could be seen all the way from Port Glasgow. 578 00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:22,400 Speaker 3: The plaque alleges at the site was one of the 579 00:30:22,520 --> 00:30:25,479 Speaker 3: quote leading producers of Sherbert in the world until one 580 00:30:25,560 --> 00:30:28,720 Speaker 3: faithful day a young apprentice named Bert dropped a glass 581 00:30:28,760 --> 00:30:32,920 Speaker 3: of pineapple ade in powder Room B. The resulting Sherbert 582 00:30:33,000 --> 00:30:36,440 Speaker 3: explosion blue young Bert from the first floor into the 583 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:41,080 Speaker 3: adjacent brewery, sending beer everywhere. The sign claims the resulting 584 00:30:41,200 --> 00:30:44,040 Speaker 3: mix quote of Sherbert and fuzzy liquid caused a foam 585 00:30:44,120 --> 00:30:47,160 Speaker 3: explosion which could be seen from Port Glasgow, and was 586 00:30:47,240 --> 00:30:50,080 Speaker 3: to rewrite the town planning rule book on the placement 587 00:30:50,120 --> 00:30:54,240 Speaker 3: of Sherbert factories. But the bonkers doesn't stop there. Apparently, 588 00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:57,000 Speaker 3: children from all across the city were quote drafted into 589 00:30:57,080 --> 00:30:59,280 Speaker 3: eating their way through the Sherbert. 590 00:30:58,880 --> 00:30:59,720 Speaker 1: From the mountains. 591 00:31:00,360 --> 00:31:03,960 Speaker 3: Oh No, as young as six and seven worked tirelessly 592 00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:09,880 Speaker 3: through the night what to chomp, trapped families from their 593 00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:13,640 Speaker 3: homes and free up the area's streets and pavements, with 594 00:31:13,880 --> 00:31:18,640 Speaker 3: no regard for their own dental health and it amazingly 595 00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,800 Speaker 3: some Sherbet residue can still be seen on local buildings 596 00:31:21,840 --> 00:31:25,840 Speaker 3: and flagstones to this day. I just want to say, 597 00:31:25,960 --> 00:31:30,680 Speaker 3: whoever put this plaque up, I love you. You're bananimal 598 00:31:30,760 --> 00:31:31,160 Speaker 3: of the week. 599 00:31:31,800 --> 00:31:35,960 Speaker 2: Yes, huge Bananimal of the Week. Fake signs are the 600 00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:40,000 Speaker 2: greatest prank, especially when they last a really long time. Yes, 601 00:31:40,800 --> 00:31:43,000 Speaker 2: Karen Kilgareff, I'm gonna have to text her doing this. 602 00:31:43,120 --> 00:31:45,120 Speaker 2: I'll try to find out the information. But I think 603 00:31:45,360 --> 00:31:48,959 Speaker 2: in this small park in Silver Lake, there's this fountain, 604 00:31:49,680 --> 00:31:53,120 Speaker 2: and in the fountain somebody put a plaque that I 605 00:31:53,240 --> 00:31:56,480 Speaker 2: think was there for something like eleven years that said 606 00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:59,080 Speaker 2: dedicated in honor and then was a woman's name, as 607 00:31:59,120 --> 00:32:02,760 Speaker 2: like Ruth was say, it's Ruth Johnston. She hated this 608 00:32:03,000 --> 00:32:07,120 Speaker 2: park and it's forever. People just thought it was real. 609 00:32:07,760 --> 00:32:10,280 Speaker 2: I'll text Gari, but I love that kind of shit. 610 00:32:10,360 --> 00:32:12,800 Speaker 2: We kurtain. I've done kind of stuff like that before. 611 00:32:13,440 --> 00:32:16,760 Speaker 2: And our brewer puts stickers on fruit that say the 612 00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:18,280 Speaker 2: wrong thing in grocery store. 613 00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:22,479 Speaker 1: It's really funny and also hurt used to sign greeting cards. 614 00:32:22,960 --> 00:32:23,360 Speaker 2: Oh yeah. 615 00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:25,880 Speaker 3: Well, Also there is down in Silver Lake there is 616 00:32:26,000 --> 00:32:30,040 Speaker 3: I put up underneath a regular stop sign, there's another 617 00:32:30,200 --> 00:32:37,840 Speaker 3: stop sign and so it just says stop, no, you stop, uh, 618 00:32:38,080 --> 00:32:39,880 Speaker 3: And it's like on there. It's been on there for 619 00:32:40,200 --> 00:32:42,440 Speaker 3: I think seven years now, and no one's been. No 620 00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:44,440 Speaker 3: one's taken it down, so I'm pretty excited. 621 00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:45,440 Speaker 1: This is my favorite. 622 00:32:45,560 --> 00:32:48,000 Speaker 3: One of my favorite things is fake plaques around town. 623 00:32:49,160 --> 00:32:52,680 Speaker 4: Oh yeah, so great. I commend you all for like 624 00:32:52,920 --> 00:32:55,320 Speaker 4: doing that. Like I always, I'm always like, oh, that's 625 00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:59,480 Speaker 4: so cool. Why don't I have that kind of personality 626 00:32:59,640 --> 00:33:03,120 Speaker 4: or motivation. I don't I come up with that. You know, 627 00:33:03,200 --> 00:33:06,080 Speaker 4: I can appreciate it really well, but I'm never like, 628 00:33:06,200 --> 00:33:08,400 Speaker 4: I don't know if I'm too scared to like in 629 00:33:08,480 --> 00:33:12,120 Speaker 4: the middle of the night run up and post it. 630 00:33:13,440 --> 00:33:16,160 Speaker 2: No performance art. When you were in art school, you didn't. 631 00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:17,800 Speaker 2: You and your friends didn't go out and like kind 632 00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:21,320 Speaker 2: of post public things that you thought might bring a 633 00:33:21,320 --> 00:33:22,640 Speaker 2: little joy into people's lives. 634 00:33:23,360 --> 00:33:26,120 Speaker 4: No, I just did it. I was I did, Like, 635 00:33:26,520 --> 00:33:28,720 Speaker 4: I just when it when it was right, you know, 636 00:33:29,280 --> 00:33:32,560 Speaker 4: Like I did like a performance in Chinatown, but it 637 00:33:32,640 --> 00:33:34,880 Speaker 4: was like a it was like a dance performance. I 638 00:33:35,000 --> 00:33:38,840 Speaker 4: wasn't daring, you know, because yeah, because at the time 639 00:33:38,880 --> 00:33:42,080 Speaker 4: people were doing like, you know, like just rolling around 640 00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:43,560 Speaker 4: on the ground naked kind of stuff. 641 00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:47,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, yeah, but I. 642 00:33:47,400 --> 00:33:50,400 Speaker 4: Think it's because everyone in art school. Actually, this is why, 643 00:33:50,680 --> 00:33:53,240 Speaker 4: this is why the kind of pranks you're talking about 644 00:33:53,320 --> 00:33:56,640 Speaker 4: wasn't happening because they were so serious. They weren't into 645 00:33:57,520 --> 00:33:59,760 Speaker 4: they weren't funny. They weren't what you were doing is 646 00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:03,000 Speaker 4: silly and funny. They weren't into the sillies. So they 647 00:34:03,000 --> 00:34:06,520 Speaker 4: would never do it a fake placard because they think 648 00:34:06,600 --> 00:34:09,800 Speaker 4: that's like, ooh, amateure. You know. They'd rather like, you know, 649 00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:11,440 Speaker 4: pee in a cup and then drink it. 650 00:34:14,880 --> 00:34:17,280 Speaker 3: Were you doing comedy when you were going to art school? 651 00:34:17,280 --> 00:34:18,480 Speaker 3: And where did you go to art school at? 652 00:34:18,680 --> 00:34:19,719 Speaker 4: I went to cal Arts. 653 00:34:19,960 --> 00:34:22,320 Speaker 1: Okay, you're doing comedy during that time or did you 654 00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:23,120 Speaker 1: find it later? 655 00:34:23,560 --> 00:34:27,120 Speaker 4: I was doing comedy. I started comedy before art school, 656 00:34:27,160 --> 00:34:28,880 Speaker 4: but when I was in art school because I double 657 00:34:29,000 --> 00:34:33,880 Speaker 4: majored like a psychopath, I didn't have time to do 658 00:34:34,040 --> 00:34:36,920 Speaker 4: comedy as much. So, but I actually got in with 659 00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:39,880 Speaker 4: some of my like with stand up writing, and I 660 00:34:40,200 --> 00:34:42,480 Speaker 4: sent that a clip of me doing comedy, so I 661 00:34:42,560 --> 00:34:45,560 Speaker 4: was like, oh, that's cool. They considered that creative writing. 662 00:34:47,760 --> 00:34:49,560 Speaker 4: But then once I was there, there was nowhere to 663 00:34:49,680 --> 00:34:52,640 Speaker 4: implement it. Like anytime I wanted to do comedy, they 664 00:34:52,680 --> 00:34:56,000 Speaker 4: were kind of they were like, ah, that's so like immature, 665 00:34:56,239 --> 00:34:59,360 Speaker 4: just like jokes and joke writing where could you know, 666 00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:05,480 Speaker 4: do something crazier like you know, berry roasted roast chicken 667 00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:08,319 Speaker 4: from Ralphs or something, you know what I mean. 668 00:35:08,719 --> 00:35:14,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think in college I also thought comedy was 669 00:35:15,239 --> 00:35:16,120 Speaker 3: like stupid. 670 00:35:16,320 --> 00:35:16,520 Speaker 2: You know. 671 00:35:16,760 --> 00:35:19,359 Speaker 3: It wasn't until I got out of that academic kind 672 00:35:19,400 --> 00:35:21,400 Speaker 3: of sphere that I saw that it was like so 673 00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:25,520 Speaker 3: joyful and what I wanted to do, yeah, which was 674 00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:26,359 Speaker 3: always too bad. 675 00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:28,480 Speaker 1: You wait, you were doing stand up when you were 676 00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:29,240 Speaker 1: in like high school. 677 00:35:30,120 --> 00:35:32,600 Speaker 4: I started, no, like right after I went to so 678 00:35:32,840 --> 00:35:36,600 Speaker 4: kell Art's was grad school. Yeah, yeah, I started when 679 00:35:36,640 --> 00:35:39,560 Speaker 4: I was like twenty stand up yeah, okay, yeah, and 680 00:35:39,680 --> 00:35:43,120 Speaker 4: then but you know, yeah, I love stop stop, no, 681 00:35:43,320 --> 00:35:43,880 Speaker 4: you stop. 682 00:35:44,000 --> 00:35:44,320 Speaker 3: Come on. 683 00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:47,879 Speaker 4: That's a that's a that's a thesis. That's that could 684 00:35:47,880 --> 00:35:50,120 Speaker 4: be someone's thesis at kell Arts. 685 00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:53,640 Speaker 2: At my college, my we had a sketch TV show 686 00:35:53,880 --> 00:35:55,960 Speaker 2: and nobody really had a TV show. We had the 687 00:35:56,200 --> 00:35:59,440 Speaker 2: crappiest TV studio. And I actually went back and just 688 00:35:59,560 --> 00:36:01,720 Speaker 2: walked the campus like two years ago, and it hasn't 689 00:36:01,719 --> 00:36:05,640 Speaker 2: been upgraded at all. I mean, it's incredibly bad. One day, 690 00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:07,759 Speaker 2: if I have like a distant uncle that leaves me 691 00:36:07,800 --> 00:36:11,320 Speaker 2: a billion dollars, I'll upgrade U Mass's TV Studio. But 692 00:36:11,520 --> 00:36:14,359 Speaker 2: we that my buddy John Green, who was on the show, 693 00:36:15,440 --> 00:36:18,480 Speaker 2: he on The Sketch Show. He had this idea that 694 00:36:18,680 --> 00:36:20,640 Speaker 2: you know how like when somebody hand you a flyer 695 00:36:20,680 --> 00:36:22,040 Speaker 2: and you take it and you look at it for 696 00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:23,840 Speaker 2: one second, then you instantly throw it away. So we 697 00:36:23,880 --> 00:36:26,400 Speaker 2: would have one of us handing out flyers to tell 698 00:36:26,440 --> 00:36:28,600 Speaker 2: everybody that our shows were on Tuesday nights, and then 699 00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:30,919 Speaker 2: we had another friend holding a trash bag ten feet 700 00:36:30,960 --> 00:36:33,800 Speaker 2: behind you, so and we would just recycle him. And 701 00:36:33,920 --> 00:36:35,719 Speaker 2: so we just kept handing out the same like it 702 00:36:35,840 --> 00:36:38,440 Speaker 2: was the best idea. It was so genius, and we 703 00:36:38,480 --> 00:36:40,120 Speaker 2: would just take them back out and hand them back 704 00:36:40,120 --> 00:36:42,120 Speaker 2: out and people would read them and then we'd be like, 705 00:36:42,160 --> 00:36:43,560 Speaker 2: you could throw it out right here, and they would 706 00:36:43,560 --> 00:36:45,920 Speaker 2: put it in. We'd hand it better. So we only 707 00:36:46,000 --> 00:36:48,160 Speaker 2: had to print like twenty flyers. We handed it out 708 00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:52,279 Speaker 2: to like fifteen thousand students. But that curtain. I went 709 00:36:52,400 --> 00:36:57,360 Speaker 2: to Kaskaskia, which is the smallest town in Illinois, and 710 00:36:57,480 --> 00:36:59,360 Speaker 2: at one point I think it was the capital of 711 00:36:59,400 --> 00:37:01,000 Speaker 2: Illinois for them a little bit. 712 00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:03,800 Speaker 3: It was until the river moved around it. And this 713 00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,040 Speaker 3: was during when we were when jets we were jet 714 00:37:06,120 --> 00:37:08,520 Speaker 3: skiing from Chicago to New Orleans. 715 00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:11,160 Speaker 2: Right, and so we decided to go to the smallest 716 00:37:11,200 --> 00:37:14,080 Speaker 2: town in Illinois, which it was eleven people or fourteen people. 717 00:37:14,480 --> 00:37:17,200 Speaker 1: It kept going like back and forth because people would die. 718 00:37:17,960 --> 00:37:19,880 Speaker 2: Right, So there were eight people. So we went to 719 00:37:20,040 --> 00:37:22,400 Speaker 2: all eight residence houses and knocked on the door and 720 00:37:22,440 --> 00:37:25,319 Speaker 2: then Kurt delivered them a bunt cake. Each person got 721 00:37:25,400 --> 00:37:29,200 Speaker 2: a bunk cake. Now, in a lot of places you go, 722 00:37:29,640 --> 00:37:31,760 Speaker 2: I wouldn't open the door if there was a camera 723 00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:35,600 Speaker 2: crew and a strange man wearing a tuxied a wet suits. 724 00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:40,239 Speaker 2: They opened the door. Yes, behind Kurt. They opened the door. 725 00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:42,400 Speaker 2: We gave them bunk cakes. They were very grateful. And 726 00:37:42,480 --> 00:37:45,719 Speaker 2: then our big surprise reveal and the show was we 727 00:37:46,160 --> 00:37:49,319 Speaker 2: had gotten them a billboard along their main highway there 728 00:37:49,400 --> 00:37:52,160 Speaker 2: on the interstate that said, well, Kurt, tell them. 729 00:37:52,239 --> 00:37:53,280 Speaker 1: I think it said. 730 00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:58,239 Speaker 3: Said so it was a photograph of kittens, like eight 731 00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:01,000 Speaker 3: kittens jumping out of a birthday cake. And then it 732 00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:03,840 Speaker 3: just said Kaskaskia, we're doing fine. 733 00:38:05,920 --> 00:38:08,080 Speaker 2: So we take all eight people and most of them 734 00:38:08,120 --> 00:38:09,080 Speaker 2: are fold them. 735 00:38:09,200 --> 00:38:11,399 Speaker 1: They don't know the buck is going on a lot 736 00:38:11,440 --> 00:38:12,560 Speaker 1: of it, but they're saying yeah. 737 00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:12,919 Speaker 4: Wow. 738 00:38:13,280 --> 00:38:16,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, they're median age sixty five. I would say, these 739 00:38:16,520 --> 00:38:18,880 Speaker 2: eight people and we tell them to turn around, and 740 00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:22,240 Speaker 2: then they see the sign and some of them were crying, 741 00:38:22,680 --> 00:38:25,759 Speaker 2: some of them hugged us, some of them hugged each other, 742 00:38:26,040 --> 00:38:28,239 Speaker 2: and it was like, we acknowledged this town in the 743 00:38:28,280 --> 00:38:31,440 Speaker 2: middle of nowhere. So big shout out to Kaskaskia. If 744 00:38:31,520 --> 00:38:33,399 Speaker 2: Comedy Center would have given us more money, we would 745 00:38:33,400 --> 00:38:35,120 Speaker 2: pay to add that thing up for twenty years. But 746 00:38:35,239 --> 00:38:38,120 Speaker 2: it was so funny going out of a cake for 747 00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:40,399 Speaker 2: a town that is completely forgotten by time. 748 00:38:41,000 --> 00:38:43,480 Speaker 4: Oh that's amazing you guys. 749 00:38:44,040 --> 00:38:48,560 Speaker 2: Guys, this is a flash update from Caen from Karen 750 00:38:48,640 --> 00:38:51,239 Speaker 2: Kilgareth answered my text. Guys, we're friends like that. I 751 00:38:51,440 --> 00:38:56,600 Speaker 2: know her. It says it's a fake memorial plaque. It 752 00:38:56,680 --> 00:39:00,320 Speaker 2: says in memory of Roger Bucklesby, who hate did this 753 00:39:00,520 --> 00:39:01,920 Speaker 2: park and everyone in it. 754 00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:07,759 Speaker 3: That's so simple. Oh man, I want to make some 755 00:39:07,880 --> 00:39:11,279 Speaker 3: fake plaques. It just it's inspires me. That's what I 756 00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:13,880 Speaker 3: would love to say, because Scotty and all I always 757 00:39:13,960 --> 00:39:15,320 Speaker 3: used to have this idea that we would have the 758 00:39:15,480 --> 00:39:17,640 Speaker 3: Army of the Absurd if we ever got a show. 759 00:39:17,719 --> 00:39:20,080 Speaker 3: People would go out and do shit like this in 760 00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:22,040 Speaker 3: the world, just making the world a little more absurd 761 00:39:22,320 --> 00:39:24,560 Speaker 3: and ban animals. If anybody wants to make their own 762 00:39:24,680 --> 00:39:26,399 Speaker 3: plaque and put it up, please. 763 00:39:26,200 --> 00:39:30,319 Speaker 1: See us a photograph. We will we will worship you. Yeah, 764 00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:32,399 Speaker 1: you got to give me another one? 765 00:39:32,880 --> 00:39:33,200 Speaker 2: Is it me? 766 00:39:33,400 --> 00:39:33,520 Speaker 4: Oh? 767 00:39:33,560 --> 00:39:33,759 Speaker 2: Good? 768 00:39:34,320 --> 00:39:34,440 Speaker 4: Uh? 769 00:39:35,880 --> 00:39:42,080 Speaker 2: Angela Jeffreedy love her great writer. Everywhere is a blessing 770 00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:47,080 Speaker 2: for The Guardian headline goes something like this. Venice gondola 771 00:39:47,160 --> 00:39:53,320 Speaker 2: tours reduced capacity due to overweight tourists. So these overweight 772 00:39:53,440 --> 00:39:56,120 Speaker 2: tourists and this is happening right now, which I felt 773 00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:59,360 Speaker 2: better because it means it's not Americans, because we're not 774 00:39:59,440 --> 00:40:03,640 Speaker 2: allowed any We're not allowed in Europe, so right the 775 00:40:03,800 --> 00:40:07,400 Speaker 2: rest of the world is getting chubbed. Nope, nope. So 776 00:40:07,920 --> 00:40:10,600 Speaker 2: they had to go from maximum number of passengers, had 777 00:40:10,600 --> 00:40:14,440 Speaker 2: to go from six people to five. Venice gondoliers have 778 00:40:14,520 --> 00:40:17,080 Speaker 2: reduced capacity on their boats, blaming the increased burden on 779 00:40:17,200 --> 00:40:21,920 Speaker 2: overweight tourists. Uh so as a classic tour the city's canals, 780 00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,720 Speaker 2: but they've had to pull it down because the boats 781 00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:26,960 Speaker 2: are sinking low enough where water is now getting into 782 00:40:27,000 --> 00:40:29,960 Speaker 2: the boats and the gondoliers, which Kurt's done a gondola 783 00:40:30,000 --> 00:40:34,160 Speaker 2: comedy show a couple of times. They don't have a 784 00:40:34,200 --> 00:40:36,759 Speaker 2: way to measure or they don't have scales, so they 785 00:40:36,880 --> 00:40:39,040 Speaker 2: just had to drop a person. They said, we can 786 00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:40,839 Speaker 2: only have five and not six. And this is after 787 00:40:41,040 --> 00:40:42,279 Speaker 2: like decades of doing this. 788 00:40:42,520 --> 00:40:44,920 Speaker 1: That would be crazy. If they had a scale before 789 00:40:45,000 --> 00:40:45,640 Speaker 1: you got. 790 00:40:46,400 --> 00:40:49,280 Speaker 2: I think that would be a problem, honestly. 791 00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:52,360 Speaker 4: So this is very it feels very targeted. It's like, 792 00:40:52,440 --> 00:40:55,200 Speaker 4: we're not gonna name who, but it's the one person 793 00:40:55,480 --> 00:40:56,040 Speaker 4: that we need. 794 00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:59,600 Speaker 2: To kick off. That's right, Gary, Yeah, it's just. 795 00:40:59,680 --> 00:41:02,920 Speaker 4: One less person, that's all. That's all close their eyes, 796 00:41:04,280 --> 00:41:06,360 Speaker 4: end point. We'll just close our eyes and point and 797 00:41:06,440 --> 00:41:07,640 Speaker 4: then we'll open our eyes. 798 00:41:07,719 --> 00:41:14,680 Speaker 2: Whoever's Yeah, So this guy named Raoul Veverato, who's the 799 00:41:14,840 --> 00:41:19,120 Speaker 2: president of the Association of Substitute Gondoliers, which I'll get 800 00:41:19,160 --> 00:41:21,160 Speaker 2: to because there is a very exclusive thing to be 801 00:41:21,200 --> 00:41:23,680 Speaker 2: a gondolier, and it's also an exclusive thing to be 802 00:41:23,760 --> 00:41:24,920 Speaker 2: a substitute gondolier. 803 00:41:25,440 --> 00:41:28,360 Speaker 3: So stitute gondolier, none of the passengers pay attention to 804 00:41:28,440 --> 00:41:28,719 Speaker 3: you and. 805 00:41:28,880 --> 00:41:32,440 Speaker 2: Just yeah, yeah. They just put their head down and 806 00:41:32,560 --> 00:41:35,839 Speaker 2: sleep and they all pretend that their name isn't their name. 807 00:41:36,600 --> 00:41:38,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, they just show movies. 808 00:41:40,080 --> 00:41:41,279 Speaker 1: They don't even get on the boat. 809 00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:46,520 Speaker 6: They the boat send an old magma box TV with 810 00:41:46,600 --> 00:41:51,040 Speaker 6: a v HS on it, and you're like, yes, yes, 811 00:41:52,600 --> 00:41:55,399 Speaker 6: they're gonna show Escape from Which Mountain again. 812 00:41:56,440 --> 00:42:02,040 Speaker 2: So this is what very good specific got it. Remember it. 813 00:42:02,880 --> 00:42:06,400 Speaker 2: Raoul said this to La Republica and these are his words. 814 00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:13,640 Speaker 2: Tourists are now overweight from some countries. Bombs load onto 815 00:42:13,719 --> 00:42:16,600 Speaker 2: our boats. Okay, this is just name calling at this point. 816 00:42:16,680 --> 00:42:18,920 Speaker 2: And when the boat is fully loaded, the hall sinks 817 00:42:18,920 --> 00:42:22,320 Speaker 2: and water enters. Advancing with over half a ton of 818 00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:28,080 Speaker 2: meat on board is dangerous. Raoul, you are an evil man. 819 00:42:28,600 --> 00:42:33,239 Speaker 2: Have some compassion, you idiot. So here's just some factoids 820 00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:36,920 Speaker 2: for you two, because I know you both thrive on facts. 821 00:42:38,920 --> 00:42:41,640 Speaker 2: Though anybody can apply to be a gondolier, the idea 822 00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:45,200 Speaker 2: is to protect the trade. So there they don't want 823 00:42:45,239 --> 00:42:50,000 Speaker 2: outsider gondolier families to start taking over. Very strange. So 824 00:42:50,320 --> 00:42:52,960 Speaker 2: they're the profession which has been a pillar of a 825 00:42:53,480 --> 00:42:58,560 Speaker 2: venice since since one ninety four, almost said nineteen oh four. 826 00:42:58,880 --> 00:43:02,479 Speaker 2: Since one thousand nine. There are four hundred and thirty 827 00:43:02,520 --> 00:43:05,919 Speaker 2: three gondoliers and one hundred and eighty substitute gondoliers. Also, 828 00:43:05,920 --> 00:43:07,840 Speaker 2: I think Venice is going to be completely underwater in 829 00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:12,920 Speaker 2: like five years, So go there if you can. And 830 00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:17,279 Speaker 2: the gondolier world is unique. Thirty four hundred and thirty 831 00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:19,160 Speaker 2: three of us. Finding someone from Paris, New York or 832 00:43:19,160 --> 00:43:22,040 Speaker 2: any other cities would not be a continuation of the tradition. 833 00:43:22,520 --> 00:43:25,840 Speaker 2: It would be like a pizza maker who isn't from Naples. 834 00:43:26,239 --> 00:43:30,160 Speaker 2: I mean Italy is shots fired, shots fired Italy? 835 00:43:30,960 --> 00:43:31,120 Speaker 4: Right? 836 00:43:31,400 --> 00:43:31,760 Speaker 2: Yahause. 837 00:43:32,920 --> 00:43:36,279 Speaker 4: So I went to Venice High School in Los Angeles, OK. 838 00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:42,279 Speaker 4: And and our mascot guess what it was. We were. 839 00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:44,359 Speaker 4: We were the Gondoliers. 840 00:43:44,600 --> 00:43:47,560 Speaker 3: No, really nice guy who dressed up as a gondolier 841 00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:49,080 Speaker 3: like games and stuff and dance. 842 00:43:49,200 --> 00:43:51,560 Speaker 4: Yeah. Yeah, don't tell this guy, you know, if he's 843 00:43:51,960 --> 00:43:54,640 Speaker 4: if he's worried about fakes, Oh my god. And I 844 00:43:54,800 --> 00:43:58,920 Speaker 4: was a cheerleader too, So every Friday football season I 845 00:43:59,040 --> 00:44:03,960 Speaker 4: was dancing with the Venice gondolier, you know. But yeah, 846 00:44:04,560 --> 00:44:07,440 Speaker 4: he was like, but what is it like he was? 847 00:44:07,600 --> 00:44:10,840 Speaker 4: He was in there, he had the hat, but it 848 00:44:10,960 --> 00:44:13,560 Speaker 4: was like a fake. You know, he had to put 849 00:44:13,600 --> 00:44:16,200 Speaker 4: on a head too. You know what I'm saying, okay. 850 00:44:16,000 --> 00:44:19,880 Speaker 2: How about fake mustache, fake Italian racist, stereotypical mustache. 851 00:44:20,680 --> 00:44:24,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, a little bit. It was, it was, it was questionable, 852 00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:26,120 Speaker 4: but so I can see why, you know anyway, but 853 00:44:26,280 --> 00:44:29,480 Speaker 4: the gondos close to my heart because we we that 854 00:44:29,640 --> 00:44:30,720 Speaker 4: was that was our team. 855 00:44:33,280 --> 00:44:36,360 Speaker 3: We have a we have a good friend, poet Derek Brown. 856 00:44:37,920 --> 00:44:41,239 Speaker 3: Someday we'll be on bananas. And he was a he 857 00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:45,719 Speaker 3: was a Long Beach gondolier for many years, and so 858 00:44:45,920 --> 00:44:48,080 Speaker 3: and like because Long Beach has these kind of beautiful canals. 859 00:44:48,200 --> 00:44:51,640 Speaker 3: Nobody knows about Long Beach, California, and and so he 860 00:44:51,719 --> 00:44:53,960 Speaker 3: and I started and you should come do it. When 861 00:44:54,040 --> 00:44:57,440 Speaker 3: the choir is over, let's go. But it's a comedy 862 00:44:57,520 --> 00:45:02,040 Speaker 3: show on a gondola at it's really really. 863 00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:04,840 Speaker 4: Fun, so gorgeous. So you are the gondolier, like the 864 00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:05,840 Speaker 4: stand up is the. 865 00:45:07,520 --> 00:45:11,320 Speaker 3: So there's two gondolas, each fit fourteen people. You go 866 00:45:11,480 --> 00:45:13,960 Speaker 3: on a gondola ride like through the canals, and then 867 00:45:14,040 --> 00:45:17,800 Speaker 3: we anchor we like or them or anchor them in 868 00:45:17,880 --> 00:45:20,719 Speaker 3: the middle of the bay right at sunset, and then 869 00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:23,360 Speaker 3: they're tied together. The two boats are tied together, so 870 00:45:23,440 --> 00:45:26,280 Speaker 3: you have like a little stage in front it's amazing. 871 00:45:26,440 --> 00:45:28,040 Speaker 3: The gondoliers are in the back and then I just 872 00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:30,359 Speaker 3: stand in the back with like a flashlight for your light, 873 00:45:30,440 --> 00:45:34,040 Speaker 3: and then we have a little mic and a little 874 00:45:34,120 --> 00:45:36,120 Speaker 3: amp and you do stand up or whatever you want 875 00:45:36,160 --> 00:45:36,279 Speaker 3: to do. 876 00:45:36,920 --> 00:45:39,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, it's so gorgeous. 877 00:45:39,280 --> 00:45:42,160 Speaker 2: It was really it's fun. You get wine drunk. I 878 00:45:42,280 --> 00:45:44,759 Speaker 2: sat there with our mutual friend Molly and just you 879 00:45:44,920 --> 00:45:47,759 Speaker 2: get wine drunk and watch comedians like doing stand up 880 00:45:47,800 --> 00:45:51,680 Speaker 2: on a gone a gondola and uh, just trying not 881 00:45:51,800 --> 00:45:54,160 Speaker 2: to fall in the water. And it's beautiful. 882 00:45:54,480 --> 00:45:56,200 Speaker 4: So you almost forget you're in Long Beat. 883 00:45:56,719 --> 00:45:59,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, not that you know. 884 00:46:00,280 --> 00:46:01,160 Speaker 4: Long Beach is great. 885 00:46:01,360 --> 00:46:05,879 Speaker 2: Yeah, we love Long Beach. Number number one. 886 00:46:11,880 --> 00:46:16,439 Speaker 1: This is so fascinating. This is like less, This isn't 887 00:46:16,640 --> 00:46:17,799 Speaker 1: there's no okay. One. 888 00:46:18,000 --> 00:46:22,239 Speaker 3: This is from Yahoo News by our buddy Katie Mather. 889 00:46:23,040 --> 00:46:27,359 Speaker 2: Ah, God, take my heart. 890 00:46:28,200 --> 00:46:33,399 Speaker 3: Uh, one in ten think partner eating McDonald's without them 891 00:46:33,640 --> 00:46:35,320 Speaker 3: is as bad as cheating. 892 00:46:35,920 --> 00:46:36,879 Speaker 2: Oh my god. 893 00:46:37,239 --> 00:46:43,239 Speaker 3: Bold So this is a This was a one pole 894 00:46:43,400 --> 00:46:47,000 Speaker 3: survey of one thousand people in the UK found that 895 00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:49,759 Speaker 3: more than one in ten people consider their signament significant 896 00:46:49,800 --> 00:46:52,160 Speaker 3: other eating McDonald's without them to be as bad as cheating. 897 00:46:52,280 --> 00:46:53,719 Speaker 1: I don't know who the fuck. 898 00:46:54,120 --> 00:46:56,759 Speaker 3: Is doing Like, I understand one pole is doing this, 899 00:46:57,440 --> 00:46:59,320 Speaker 3: but I don't understand who at one pole was like, 900 00:46:59,400 --> 00:47:02,680 Speaker 3: we gotta find out what people think about their partner 901 00:47:02,760 --> 00:47:07,000 Speaker 3: eating McDonald's without them. So it's unclear what area of 902 00:47:07,000 --> 00:47:09,280 Speaker 3: the UK was pulled for the survey, but the study 903 00:47:09,320 --> 00:47:11,520 Speaker 3: did note that the UK's lockdown has prevented people from 904 00:47:11,520 --> 00:47:14,680 Speaker 3: getting fast food months, which could arguably influence their devotion 905 00:47:14,800 --> 00:47:17,360 Speaker 3: to the chain. According to me are online, one in 906 00:47:17,520 --> 00:47:19,920 Speaker 3: five people interviewed said the taste of a Big Mac 907 00:47:20,000 --> 00:47:22,600 Speaker 3: after lockdown did did Bigdonald's pay for this? 908 00:47:25,640 --> 00:47:26,320 Speaker 2: We paid for this? 909 00:47:26,920 --> 00:47:33,120 Speaker 4: Yeah, oh, very specific, okay, the big Mac. 910 00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:35,440 Speaker 3: One in five people interviewed said the taste of a 911 00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:38,040 Speaker 3: Big Mac after lockdown would be better than a raise 912 00:47:38,080 --> 00:47:40,600 Speaker 3: at work. Sixteen percent of the group said eating a 913 00:47:40,640 --> 00:47:43,040 Speaker 3: Big Mac after months without McDonald's would be as exciting 914 00:47:43,160 --> 00:47:48,799 Speaker 3: as the birth of their first child. Thirteen percent said 915 00:47:48,840 --> 00:47:53,640 Speaker 3: the experience would be better than their wedding day. Also 916 00:47:53,719 --> 00:47:55,879 Speaker 3: found that forty five percent of the People's surveys said 917 00:47:55,880 --> 00:47:56,840 Speaker 3: they would rather give. 918 00:47:56,800 --> 00:47:59,680 Speaker 1: Up alcohol than McDonald's. 919 00:48:00,040 --> 00:48:00,759 Speaker 2: I'd rather die. 920 00:48:01,360 --> 00:48:03,200 Speaker 3: One in ten would rather get rid of their cell 921 00:48:03,280 --> 00:48:05,760 Speaker 3: phone and twenty nine percent would rather give up watching 922 00:48:05,920 --> 00:48:08,319 Speaker 3: sports for a year if it meant they could eat 923 00:48:08,360 --> 00:48:09,080 Speaker 3: a big Mac. 924 00:48:09,280 --> 00:48:12,080 Speaker 1: Right now? What the fuck is going on? 925 00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:13,320 Speaker 4: Did they just do it? 926 00:48:14,400 --> 00:48:14,640 Speaker 1: Yeah? 927 00:48:14,920 --> 00:48:18,560 Speaker 4: I mean they just interviewed people really down on luck, 928 00:48:18,719 --> 00:48:22,880 Speaker 4: their luck, like they they just did. They just like go, 929 00:48:23,120 --> 00:48:25,279 Speaker 4: they just went up to a homeless person. I'm like, 930 00:48:25,560 --> 00:48:28,080 Speaker 4: and who has no phone and home. 931 00:48:28,680 --> 00:48:33,000 Speaker 1: And job or a love or a partner or a partner. 932 00:48:33,200 --> 00:48:35,279 Speaker 1: So he was like, yeah, I think is that I 933 00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:36,160 Speaker 1: want a big Mac? 934 00:48:36,360 --> 00:48:39,120 Speaker 4: He was like, yeah, I'm hungry. Yeah, I want to say, yeah, 935 00:48:39,160 --> 00:48:42,400 Speaker 4: I'd rather do a sandwich, give up drinking. Yeah, I 936 00:48:42,480 --> 00:48:46,200 Speaker 4: don't have access to that right now? What that's what happened. 937 00:48:46,280 --> 00:48:47,880 Speaker 1: That's what that's gotta be. 938 00:48:48,200 --> 00:48:51,799 Speaker 3: I mean, or they all of these people are McDonald's employees, 939 00:48:51,840 --> 00:48:52,080 Speaker 3: do you know. 940 00:48:52,120 --> 00:48:52,440 Speaker 2: What I mean? 941 00:48:52,719 --> 00:48:56,000 Speaker 3: They all were McDonald's corporate and I don't know. This 942 00:48:56,120 --> 00:48:58,799 Speaker 3: is the way we got to answer this survey. I mean, 943 00:48:58,880 --> 00:49:02,080 Speaker 3: do people love McDonald that much? Am I maybe missing something? 944 00:49:02,640 --> 00:49:06,160 Speaker 2: I mean, clearly billions of people love McDonald's, but more 945 00:49:06,400 --> 00:49:09,839 Speaker 2: than kids, like the only one that I was like sure, 946 00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,120 Speaker 2: it was like I'd rather McDonald's than get rid of 947 00:49:12,160 --> 00:49:14,400 Speaker 2: my cell phone. I'm like, yes, we all at some 948 00:49:14,480 --> 00:49:18,560 Speaker 2: point you're like, I hate this thing, but what I 949 00:49:18,640 --> 00:49:21,680 Speaker 2: mean who? And also giving up alcohol? Who isn't drunk 950 00:49:21,760 --> 00:49:24,280 Speaker 2: going to McDonald's as an adult? Like, that's only forty 951 00:49:24,680 --> 00:49:25,280 Speaker 2: of the decision. 952 00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:31,040 Speaker 1: Who's going sober McDonald's trips? That seems like the big question. 953 00:49:31,960 --> 00:49:35,520 Speaker 4: I need to physically see with my eyes these people 954 00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:36,640 Speaker 4: that they interviewed. 955 00:49:37,200 --> 00:49:40,680 Speaker 3: I know, maybe in the UK, I don't know. UK listeners, 956 00:49:40,800 --> 00:49:43,160 Speaker 3: you let us know. Are you guys, what do you 957 00:49:43,200 --> 00:49:46,560 Speaker 3: go to Donald's crazy? Are you guys just out there 958 00:49:46,680 --> 00:49:50,439 Speaker 3: waiting to eat McDonald's like a fucking bunch of lunatics 959 00:49:51,280 --> 00:49:54,000 Speaker 3: just because we're here. We don't care as much because 960 00:49:54,120 --> 00:49:56,800 Speaker 3: but there you guys just love it. It just seems crazy, 961 00:49:57,200 --> 00:49:59,680 Speaker 3: it does. I can't remember the last time I had 962 00:49:59,760 --> 00:50:01,879 Speaker 3: him McDonald's. I think it was in an airport. That's 963 00:50:01,880 --> 00:50:04,480 Speaker 3: probably the only time I've ever eaten McDonald's in the 964 00:50:04,520 --> 00:50:05,200 Speaker 3: past five years. 965 00:50:05,239 --> 00:50:06,480 Speaker 4: Is it show off? 966 00:50:09,320 --> 00:50:09,600 Speaker 2: I don't know. 967 00:50:09,680 --> 00:50:11,360 Speaker 1: Then I get to fly out airplanes. 968 00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:14,480 Speaker 2: You look at him. 969 00:50:17,360 --> 00:50:22,000 Speaker 4: In the airport, well to well traveled. 970 00:50:22,880 --> 00:50:28,839 Speaker 3: Aren't you a fancy man eating our our delicious McDonald's 971 00:50:28,880 --> 00:50:29,640 Speaker 3: in your you joke? 972 00:50:29,680 --> 00:50:32,200 Speaker 2: But also at every airport if you're taking a morning flight, 973 00:50:32,320 --> 00:50:35,400 Speaker 2: like or both. You know, it's like when comics are 974 00:50:35,480 --> 00:50:37,080 Speaker 2: on the road, you guys are flo out early next 975 00:50:37,120 --> 00:50:42,040 Speaker 2: morning whatever. It's like, McDonald's has the longest lines at 976 00:50:42,080 --> 00:50:46,000 Speaker 2: airports in the morning by ten to one. It's like crazy, 977 00:50:46,160 --> 00:50:48,920 Speaker 2: how and people are just craving. And also they got 978 00:50:48,960 --> 00:50:52,640 Speaker 2: in the coffee game, and I can't front a McDonald's 979 00:50:52,640 --> 00:50:54,960 Speaker 2: hash brown is damn good. It's good. They're good at 980 00:50:55,000 --> 00:50:56,840 Speaker 2: other stuff. They're burgers aren't great. They got all the 981 00:50:57,080 --> 00:51:00,600 Speaker 2: all the accessorizing foods really good. 982 00:51:01,120 --> 00:51:04,920 Speaker 3: I'm not shitting on McDonald's here. What I'm shipping on 983 00:51:05,239 --> 00:51:09,360 Speaker 3: is any sandwich being better than the birth of your child. 984 00:51:10,040 --> 00:51:10,320 Speaker 2: I know. 985 00:51:10,800 --> 00:51:12,759 Speaker 4: That's why I think it's gotta beat. They went up 986 00:51:12,760 --> 00:51:15,120 Speaker 4: to a bunch of homeless people, I swear they were. 987 00:51:15,320 --> 00:51:18,440 Speaker 4: They were like, they were like, yeah, no, it's just 988 00:51:18,600 --> 00:51:21,080 Speaker 4: literally a sandwich. I'm gonna say yes to the sandwich 989 00:51:22,520 --> 00:51:23,919 Speaker 4: more than the birth of your child. 990 00:51:24,000 --> 00:51:24,759 Speaker 1: They're like, fuck you. 991 00:51:25,880 --> 00:51:28,719 Speaker 2: They're like, my kid's kind of dumb. Honestly, my kid's 992 00:51:28,760 --> 00:51:31,560 Speaker 2: got a weird face and he's not nice. And they're like, yeah, 993 00:51:31,600 --> 00:51:35,319 Speaker 2: I would go for a big Max supersized right now. 994 00:51:35,920 --> 00:51:39,040 Speaker 3: Yeah, it does honestly make me want to have McDonald's 995 00:51:39,080 --> 00:51:40,480 Speaker 3: right now, just talking about it. 996 00:51:40,640 --> 00:51:43,560 Speaker 1: Which is their food is a drug, their food is 997 00:51:43,800 --> 00:51:44,400 Speaker 1: a drag. 998 00:51:44,840 --> 00:51:46,840 Speaker 2: There was a scam. Oh yeah, I got what I got. 999 00:51:47,000 --> 00:51:54,400 Speaker 2: Sh send us home, let's go. Do you do you 1000 00:51:54,480 --> 00:51:57,759 Speaker 2: feel like sometimes you you grab a hold of life 1001 00:51:57,880 --> 00:52:00,640 Speaker 2: that you you take, you take life by the horns. 1002 00:52:00,680 --> 00:52:02,200 Speaker 2: Have you ever felt that way? Oh? 1003 00:52:02,320 --> 00:52:06,279 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah every morning, every morning you. 1004 00:52:06,360 --> 00:52:07,960 Speaker 2: Get out of bed and you grab life right by 1005 00:52:08,040 --> 00:52:09,640 Speaker 2: the horns. Right, that's right. 1006 00:52:09,760 --> 00:52:12,319 Speaker 4: Yeah. When I leap out and I say it's day, 1007 00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:15,399 Speaker 4: It's day one hundred or whatever. That's how many days 1008 00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:16,399 Speaker 4: I've lived on this earth. 1009 00:52:16,880 --> 00:52:24,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, you're one hundred days old. Speaking capabilities well. Gene 1010 00:52:24,080 --> 00:52:29,960 Speaker 2: Mackin from wmur nine dot com wrote this beauty man 1011 00:52:30,120 --> 00:52:32,960 Speaker 2: suffers serious injuries after grabbing bull by the horns. 1012 00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:35,600 Speaker 1: Yes so he does, Yes, he does. 1013 00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:41,520 Speaker 2: Brentwood, New Hampshire a great place to drive through. A 1014 00:52:41,640 --> 00:52:44,279 Speaker 2: man was sent to the hospital with serious injuries after 1015 00:52:44,400 --> 00:52:47,400 Speaker 2: a bull gored him on a neighborhood street in Brentwood. 1016 00:52:48,360 --> 00:52:50,720 Speaker 2: Police say the incident could have been avoided. 1017 00:52:53,840 --> 00:52:54,000 Speaker 4: Oh. 1018 00:52:54,280 --> 00:52:57,840 Speaker 2: Josh Jennings, the owner of Meadows Mirth Farm in Brentwood. 1019 00:52:58,040 --> 00:52:59,759 Speaker 2: Who is not the one that gets scored by the 1020 00:52:59,800 --> 00:53:02,960 Speaker 2: way I set Around eight pm on Friday, neighbors alerted 1021 00:53:03,040 --> 00:53:07,200 Speaker 2: him that bulls. He had bulls on his property, scary, 1022 00:53:08,360 --> 00:53:11,920 Speaker 2: Jennings said. The two animals seemed very agitated. He calmly 1023 00:53:12,040 --> 00:53:15,960 Speaker 2: worked to get them off of his crops until their 1024 00:53:16,040 --> 00:53:19,319 Speaker 2: owner and the police arrived. So far not bananas at all. 1025 00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:23,720 Speaker 2: They were a few yards from their destination when police 1026 00:53:23,840 --> 00:53:28,720 Speaker 2: had Another individual got involved and did not listen to instructions. 1027 00:53:29,280 --> 00:53:33,160 Speaker 2: That man was told to stay back and to get back, 1028 00:53:33,640 --> 00:53:36,520 Speaker 2: but he approached and took one of the bulls by 1029 00:53:36,600 --> 00:53:43,120 Speaker 2: the horns, which resulted in him being gored. I liked that. 1030 00:53:43,239 --> 00:53:46,239 Speaker 1: He was just like, this is how you drive this thing, right, 1031 00:53:47,480 --> 00:53:49,360 Speaker 1: this is the steering wheel of the. 1032 00:53:49,920 --> 00:53:59,160 Speaker 2: Bull, aspiring Instagram life coach, He walked, that's just me 1033 00:53:59,400 --> 00:54:02,320 Speaker 2: dunking on on him. So he is in the hospital 1034 00:54:02,440 --> 00:54:07,120 Speaker 2: now with serious but non threatening injury. Uh. Sometimes you 1035 00:54:07,239 --> 00:54:09,160 Speaker 2: don't got to grab life by the horns, is the 1036 00:54:09,840 --> 00:54:12,799 Speaker 2: But I mean, if it's like, don't do that, sir, Right, 1037 00:54:13,400 --> 00:54:16,440 Speaker 2: you can visualize this one so well, you can picture 1038 00:54:16,520 --> 00:54:22,880 Speaker 2: this scene so well. Well, bull is so big terrifies, terrify. 1039 00:54:23,000 --> 00:54:27,759 Speaker 3: It's a terrifying animal that has spikes on its forehead. 1040 00:54:28,360 --> 00:54:30,400 Speaker 3: It is really because like when you look at a 1041 00:54:30,480 --> 00:54:32,480 Speaker 3: dairy cow on a field and you're like, you know, 1042 00:54:32,640 --> 00:54:35,800 Speaker 3: moo at it or whatever, it doesn't seem it seems 1043 00:54:35,800 --> 00:54:37,920 Speaker 3: like a large beast, but it does not seem like 1044 00:54:38,000 --> 00:54:42,759 Speaker 3: a dangerous beast. But then a bull really scares this. 1045 00:54:43,120 --> 00:54:44,759 Speaker 3: Like when my first saw one, I was like, oh, 1046 00:54:44,840 --> 00:54:46,640 Speaker 3: this is a terrifying animal. 1047 00:54:47,360 --> 00:54:51,200 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I mean, and the horns, even the pointy 1048 00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:54,960 Speaker 4: parts are going backwards. It's going backwards as to say, 1049 00:54:55,560 --> 00:54:59,239 Speaker 4: here's a warning. These could be pointing at you, you 1050 00:54:59,280 --> 00:55:01,960 Speaker 4: know what I mean. But yeah, he even gives you 1051 00:55:02,040 --> 00:55:05,040 Speaker 4: the smooth side first to be you know what I mean. 1052 00:55:05,239 --> 00:55:07,080 Speaker 1: Get to know me, get to know me. 1053 00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:09,759 Speaker 3: This is what I'm really like, the smooth side. But 1054 00:55:09,840 --> 00:55:11,640 Speaker 3: if you piss me off, my head goes down. 1055 00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:15,439 Speaker 4: That's right, That's right. Yeah. And this motherfucker he walked 1056 00:55:15,480 --> 00:55:17,400 Speaker 4: up to it slowly to just. 1057 00:55:18,080 --> 00:55:21,680 Speaker 2: Wait, just ignores the cops. Also, the situation was under control. 1058 00:55:21,840 --> 00:55:24,160 Speaker 2: That's the very funniest part is like they were a 1059 00:55:24,320 --> 00:55:27,279 Speaker 2: few quote a few yards from their destination and this 1060 00:55:27,440 --> 00:55:30,200 Speaker 2: other guy just comes strut across the road and it's 1061 00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:32,560 Speaker 2: probably like running an MLM, and he's like, I know 1062 00:55:32,640 --> 00:55:38,080 Speaker 2: what to do, and then just kids gored. Oh boy, wow, 1063 00:55:38,160 --> 00:55:40,200 Speaker 2: I love it so much. Yeah, so good. 1064 00:55:41,080 --> 00:55:43,919 Speaker 4: I did. Also, I liked the story because I didn't 1065 00:55:43,920 --> 00:55:48,320 Speaker 4: know there were bulls in Brentwood, Yes, right, yeah, I 1066 00:55:48,520 --> 00:55:51,320 Speaker 4: just thought it was like marathon runners, that's it in 1067 00:55:51,400 --> 00:55:52,560 Speaker 4: Brentwood up there. 1068 00:55:52,719 --> 00:55:56,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, gondoliers and marathon runners in Brentwood, New Hampshire. 1069 00:55:56,880 --> 00:55:58,680 Speaker 4: This is oh Brentwood, New Hampshire. 1070 00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:02,360 Speaker 2: Sure, I missed that. 1071 00:56:02,680 --> 00:56:03,319 Speaker 4: I missed that. 1072 00:56:04,840 --> 00:56:07,879 Speaker 2: Los Angeles. If there was a bull there, it would 1073 00:56:07,880 --> 00:56:09,800 Speaker 2: be a whole different story. But there would also be 1074 00:56:09,960 --> 00:56:12,800 Speaker 2: so many influencers taking selfie's in front of it that 1075 00:56:12,920 --> 00:56:15,879 Speaker 2: somebody would eventually get gorder tramp. Yeah, without an that's right. 1076 00:56:16,080 --> 00:56:18,359 Speaker 4: That's why I was like weird, you know, I am. 1077 00:56:18,920 --> 00:56:20,840 Speaker 4: I was surprised I hadn't heard about it. You know. 1078 00:56:21,520 --> 00:56:24,360 Speaker 2: I was on the opposite side of a fence, on 1079 00:56:24,440 --> 00:56:26,440 Speaker 2: the right side of a fence, you might say, and 1080 00:56:26,560 --> 00:56:29,600 Speaker 2: a person I knew their uncle had longhorn. There was 1081 00:56:29,640 --> 00:56:32,320 Speaker 2: longhorned Texas cattle this and it was in the South 1082 00:56:32,640 --> 00:56:35,360 Speaker 2: and I was standing along the fence drinking a margarita. 1083 00:56:36,200 --> 00:56:39,320 Speaker 2: And it was in the south, so the margarita was 1084 00:56:39,400 --> 00:56:41,680 Speaker 2: in this margarita glass that was about as big as 1085 00:56:41,680 --> 00:56:44,080 Speaker 2: a fish bowl. And I'm standing there talking to my 1086 00:56:44,160 --> 00:56:46,640 Speaker 2: friend and this long horned cattle bends its head over 1087 00:56:46,680 --> 00:56:49,719 Speaker 2: the fence and with its tongue drank my whole margarita 1088 00:56:49,719 --> 00:56:54,680 Speaker 2: in two licks. And I was like, dud, cows like margarita's. 1089 00:56:54,760 --> 00:56:56,719 Speaker 2: And the guy, this guy Eddie, was like, I guess so, 1090 00:56:57,200 --> 00:57:00,120 Speaker 2: and then we just proceeded to give cows margarite. It 1091 00:57:00,239 --> 00:57:03,800 Speaker 2: is for about two hours. Turns out they love it. 1092 00:57:05,239 --> 00:57:09,200 Speaker 2: They love it like Ritz love McDonald's, the. 1093 00:57:09,280 --> 00:57:13,000 Speaker 3: Old classic sag like a UK person loves McDonald's. 1094 00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:17,720 Speaker 1: Well, let's go. Thank you so much for being on 1095 00:57:17,800 --> 00:57:18,240 Speaker 1: the show. 1096 00:57:18,480 --> 00:57:19,480 Speaker 4: Thank you for having me. 1097 00:57:19,600 --> 00:57:20,479 Speaker 1: That was so fun. 1098 00:57:20,680 --> 00:57:23,640 Speaker 3: That was you know, yeah, can you tell people a 1099 00:57:23,720 --> 00:57:25,120 Speaker 3: little bit about let's go Outsco. 1100 00:57:25,880 --> 00:57:30,080 Speaker 4: Yeah, let's go Otsco. So when uh, when we do 1101 00:57:30,200 --> 00:57:33,120 Speaker 4: the live show, it's a yeah, it's a it's a 1102 00:57:33,160 --> 00:57:36,760 Speaker 4: game show. It's a it's a modern take on a 1103 00:57:36,880 --> 00:57:39,880 Speaker 4: Japanese game show. And then the podcast version right now 1104 00:57:39,960 --> 00:57:42,120 Speaker 4: it's more interview based, but there's still a game that 1105 00:57:42,200 --> 00:57:46,240 Speaker 4: we play and we answer questions from the audience and yeah, 1106 00:57:46,320 --> 00:57:48,080 Speaker 4: it's a it's a silly world. 1107 00:57:49,000 --> 00:57:51,920 Speaker 3: Oh that's great, and uh and when does it come 1108 00:57:51,960 --> 00:57:53,760 Speaker 3: out so people can list look for it. 1109 00:57:54,280 --> 00:57:57,440 Speaker 4: It comes out every Friday, and then you can just 1110 00:57:57,520 --> 00:58:00,760 Speaker 4: look out for like updates or jokes that I just 1111 00:58:00,880 --> 00:58:04,240 Speaker 4: make online at Osco Comedy And that's me. 1112 00:58:04,960 --> 00:58:06,800 Speaker 2: And I'll be there at that live show holding that 1113 00:58:06,920 --> 00:58:09,040 Speaker 2: laptop right up to your face for the first ten 1114 00:58:09,200 --> 00:58:10,560 Speaker 2: I promise I'll be there. 1115 00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:13,280 Speaker 4: Oh my god, Thank you, Scotty and. 1116 00:58:13,400 --> 00:58:18,760 Speaker 2: Come back anytime. Kurt Scottie Bananas Bananas. 1117 00:58:24,920 --> 00:58:27,920 Speaker 3: This has been an exactly right production, produced and engineered 1118 00:58:27,920 --> 00:58:28,600 Speaker 3: by Katie. 1119 00:58:28,440 --> 00:58:32,080 Speaker 1: Levine, theme song by Kahanamanti. 1120 00:58:31,520 --> 00:58:33,800 Speaker 2: And all of our artwork is done by Travis Millard. 1121 00:58:33,920 --> 00:58:37,640 Speaker 3: So please follow us on Instagram at the Bananas Podcast, 1122 00:58:37,720 --> 00:58:39,720 Speaker 3: where we post so many more stories and make it 1123 00:58:39,840 --> 00:58:40,840 Speaker 3: here and you. 1124 00:58:40,880 --> 00:58:43,640 Speaker 2: Can share with us your strange news story by dming 1125 00:58:43,720 --> 00:58:45,880 Speaker 2: us on Instagram at the Bananas Podcast. 1126 00:58:46,120 --> 00:58:48,800 Speaker 3: So listen, subscribe, and please leave us a review on 1127 00:58:48,880 --> 00:58:51,880 Speaker 3: Apple podcast, Stitcher or wherever you get your podcasts. 1128 00:58:52,280 --> 00:58:54,200 Speaker 2: Bananas Bananas 1129 00:59:02,280 --> 00:59:07,680 Speaker 1: Travel in put dasyputns, but there the tray put the 1130 00:59:08,000 --> 00:59:09,960 Speaker 1: staby punds, but then