Speaker 1: You're listening to I Choose Me with Jenny Girl. Happy
Speaker 1: holidays everyone, Okay, I'm sending you so much love from
Speaker 1: my house to yours. And at my house, the trees decorated,
Speaker 1: the lights are on, the music's on. We are all
Speaker 1: still in our cute matching jammies, our Christmas jammies. I've
Speaker 1: made it a tradition, you guys, to all have matching
Speaker 1: jammis every year. I know it's a little extra. The
Speaker 1: guys don't really love it as much as the girls,
Speaker 1: but they humor me. So thanks guys. And honestly, I
Speaker 1: might just order Chinese food because I'm so wiped for Thanksgiving,
Speaker 1: if I'm being honest. But in all this coziness, I'm
Speaker 1: also thinking ahead, because somehow we are already on the
Speaker 1: edge of twenty twenty six. I cannot believe it. So
Speaker 1: today's episode of I Choose Me is a gentle one.
Speaker 1: It's a pause, a look back at twenty twenty five,
Speaker 1: the places we have stretched ourselves to thin, the moments
Speaker 1: we abandon our own needs, the boundaries we didn't hold,
Speaker 1: and then the part I love. We are going to
Speaker 1: walk into the new year together with honesty and forgiveness,
Speaker 1: and six simple ways to choose ourselves with more peace
Speaker 1: and intention. So if you need a little grounding today,
Speaker 1: a little hope, or just a moment that is yours,
Speaker 1: this episode is for you because we are on the
Speaker 1: cusp of a brand new year. So here we go.
Speaker 1: Here's my first question for you. Where did you give
Speaker 1: more energy than you got back? Think about that. Maybe
Speaker 1: it was your work. Maybe it was a relationship where
Speaker 1: you did more of the heavy emotional lifting. Maybe it
Speaker 1: was always being the reliable one, the fixer, the helper,
Speaker 1: the person everyone calls when their lives are falling apart.
Speaker 1: Even though you would drop everything to help the people
Speaker 1: you love, maybe you didn't ask for help because, like me,
Speaker 1: you didn't want to be a burden. We all do it.
Speaker 1: We all have those blind spots where we treat ourselves
Speaker 1: like an afterthought. The problem is when you spend a
Speaker 1: whole year being the emotional shock absorber for everyone else,
Speaker 1: you end up depleted, resentful, and just bone tired in
Speaker 1: a way sleep can't even fix. So let's do this.
Speaker 1: Let's name it. Where did you say yes when you
Speaker 1: meant no? Where did you ignore the little voice in
Speaker 1: your gut? Where did you feel small or invisible or unheard,
Speaker 1: but just kept going anyway. I had moments of that
Speaker 1: this year. Moments where my schedule owned me like a
Speaker 1: dog on a leash instead of the other way around.
Speaker 1: Moments where I let someone else's expectations override my own needs.
Speaker 1: Moments where I poured from a cup that was basically
Speaker 1: as dry as the Haar desert. This year, I like
Speaker 1: to be done with that this new year. I want
Speaker 1: to stand up for myself the way I stand up
Speaker 1: for my kids, from my mom, from my husband, for
Speaker 1: my friends. And I want that for you too. So
Speaker 1: get ready. Let's blow twenty twenty six up in the
Speaker 1: best way possible. So here are six solid ways to
Speaker 1: chew yourself in the new year. Not fluffy resolutions that
Speaker 1: never happen, not New Year Knew Me, bullshit pressure. I'm
Speaker 1: talking real tools for real humans trying to build real peace.
Speaker 1: Number One, set one boundary you can actually enforce, not
Speaker 1: ten boundaries. One boundary, one place where you stop abandoning yourself.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's not answering work techs after a certain hour.
Speaker 1: I see my producer nodding right now, hoping that I
Speaker 1: do that one. Maybe it's telling the friend who always
Speaker 1: trauma dumps. I love you, but I am not available
Speaker 1: for this right now. Maybe it's saying no to hosting everything,
Speaker 1: every holiday, every school thing, every family obligation. Find the
Speaker 1: place where twenty twenty five took advantage of you and
Speaker 1: seal that leak. A boundary is not a wall, it's
Speaker 1: a doorway where you are the one who gets to
Speaker 1: decide who walks through. Number two, Reclaim the time you
Speaker 1: gave away last year. In my twenty fifth hour episode,
Speaker 1: we talked about how there is no magical extra hour
Speaker 1: waiting for us in the sky. We have the same
Speaker 1: twenty four hours as everyone else. And guess what, we
Speaker 1: use a good chunk of twenty twenty five pouring our
Speaker 1: time into things that didn't serve us or our well being.
Speaker 1: So in twenty twenty six, picture yourself choosing one window
Speaker 1: of time every week, just one that is yours, non negotiable, untouchable,
Speaker 1: and start to cross off that time in your brand
Speaker 1: new calendar. Maybe it's Sunday mornings, Maybe it's Wednesdays at lunch.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's thirty minutes the end of the day. In
Speaker 1: your version of a rose Garden, protect it. Follow through
Speaker 1: with it. Treat it like it is an appointment with
Speaker 1: your future self, because that is exactly what it is.
Speaker 1: Number three, stop explaining your no. We over explain everything
Speaker 1: because we don't want to disappoint anyone. We over explain
Speaker 1: because we feel guilty for our own needs. We over
Speaker 1: explain because we think a no has to come with
Speaker 1: a full report, but it doesn't. A simple thank you,
Speaker 1: but I'm not available right now, or I can't take
Speaker 1: that on this week. That's enough. It might be hard
Speaker 1: because they may be disappointed, But my dear, that is
Speaker 1: theirs to hold, not yours. I know, why know. Maybe
Speaker 1: let's hear that again. If they're disappointed because you said no,
Speaker 1: that is theirs too hold. That might take some practice,
Speaker 1: but you can do it. You saying no is okay.
Speaker 1: A no is complete on its own. You don't need
Speaker 1: to dress it up, accessorize it, or give it a
Speaker 1: long backstory. Next year, allow yourself to say no more often.
Speaker 1: Number four, Rest like it's part of your job, because
Speaker 1: it is. Here's something we forget. Rest is not a
Speaker 1: reward at the end of the week. It's maintenance that
Speaker 1: allows you to show up for a busy week. I've
Speaker 1: said it before, rest is not lazy. It's maintenance for
Speaker 1: your soul. And that truth applies double during the holiday
Speaker 1: season as we wind down and and we ramp up
Speaker 1: for a new year. We live in a culture that
Speaker 1: celebrates burnout like it's a badge of honor. We choose
Speaker 1: productivity like it's proof of our worth or something. We
Speaker 1: treat exhaustion like it's noble. But if you don't rest,
Speaker 1: guess what you break. And if you break, everything around
Speaker 1: you breaks a little bit too. In these last days
Speaker 1: at twenty twenty five, choose rest, Choose recovery, Choose softness,
Speaker 1: Choose not pushing through when your body is begging you
Speaker 1: to stop. You know, I'm also talking to myself here,
Speaker 1: so thank you for walking this journey with me. And
Speaker 1: I really mean that number five. Tell yourself the truth
Speaker 1: about your relationships. I know this is a hard one,
Speaker 1: but in the new year, you deserve honesty. So I
Speaker 1: want you to ask yourself who showed up for you
Speaker 1: this year, Who consistently took from you without giving back,
Speaker 1: Who drains your energy? Who makes you feel good? Who
Speaker 1: makes you feel like the person you want to be.
Speaker 1: This isn't about cutting people out dramatically. I wouldn't recommend
Speaker 1: that I've done it doesn't go over well. It's about
Speaker 1: repositioning what's important to you. Spend less time chasing people
Speaker 1: who don't choose you, and spend more time watering the
Speaker 1: relationships that make you feel whole. Choose reciprocity, Choose emotional safety.
Speaker 1: Choose people who see your worth without asking you to
Speaker 1: earn it. And number six for twenty twenty six, choose
Speaker 1: goals that serve your soul. Your New year goals don't
Speaker 1: have to be sparkly, impressive or instagram worthy. Honestly, most
Speaker 1: New Year's resolutions actually fail in the first two weeks
Speaker 1: of January. So make goals that serve you period. Maybe
Speaker 1: your goal is to speak more kindly to yourself or
Speaker 1: to your spouse. Maybe it's to stop fixing other people's problems.
Speaker 1: Maybe it's to let something be good enough instead of perfect,
Speaker 1: to stop saying sorry every time you need something or
Speaker 1: don't like something. Maybe it's to practice being comfortable saying no.
Speaker 1: Your goals should nourish you, not push you too hard
Speaker 1: or punish you. Okay, now take a little break, take
Speaker 1: a breath, Let that all settle in choosing yourself in
Speaker 1: the New Year isn't about tightening up or toughening up
Speaker 1: or being stronger. It's about softening into who you really
Speaker 1: are and protecting that person with everything you've got. It's
Speaker 1: about deciding that the version of you who got bruised
Speaker 1: in twenty twenty five deserves better in twenty twenty six.
Speaker 1: It's about creating a life where your peace is not
Speaker 1: an afterthought. It's about remembering that you can love deeply
Speaker 1: and still say no. Sometimes you can show up and
Speaker 1: still set boundaries. You can be nurturing and still refuse
Speaker 1: to deplete yourself completely. Remember you don't need another hour.
Speaker 1: You just need to believe that you are worthy of
Speaker 1: the hours you already have. So as we say goodbye
Speaker 1: to twenty twenty five, let's give ourselves a break. Let's
Speaker 1: reflect on all that has happened, what we've accomplished, and
Speaker 1: what we have chosen for ourselves so far. In the
Speaker 1: new year, please stay with me as we continue to
Speaker 1: challenge ourselves to grow and to choose ourselves all over again.
Speaker 1: Congratulations on a job well done. I'm so proud of you.
Speaker 1: Congratulations for getting comfortable choosing yourself, for honoring the version
Speaker 1: of yourself you are becoming because when you choose yourself,
Speaker 1: everything else becomes a little more possible. I love you
Speaker 1: all so much. Happy holidays, Let's keep going together.