1 00:00:12,400 --> 00:00:15,560 Speaker 1: I was asked by a brand that I'm traveling to 2 00:00:15,640 --> 00:00:19,599 Speaker 1: an amazing location for you have to choose two original 3 00:00:19,640 --> 00:00:23,800 Speaker 1: housewives for this campaign idea. I originally wasn't sure, just 4 00:00:23,840 --> 00:00:25,920 Speaker 1: because I don't want to go back into the housewives cesspool, 5 00:00:26,000 --> 00:00:28,200 Speaker 1: nothing to do with them. But you have to pick two, 6 00:00:28,280 --> 00:00:32,280 Speaker 1: so I chose two women. Then I'm sitting last week. 7 00:00:32,320 --> 00:00:33,960 Speaker 1: My daughter is at an appointment and I have to 8 00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:35,839 Speaker 1: just kill time. And I know a girl who happens 9 00:00:35,880 --> 00:00:37,680 Speaker 1: to be in Palm Beach and I say to her, 10 00:00:37,760 --> 00:00:39,239 Speaker 1: do you want to just go get a margarita? And 11 00:00:39,280 --> 00:00:42,480 Speaker 1: I sit outside at a quiet bar. No one is there, Man, 12 00:00:42,680 --> 00:00:45,800 Speaker 1: that's not true. Twenty people are there and slowly but surely, 13 00:00:45,880 --> 00:00:48,560 Speaker 1: like sheiicish type of people start walking in, like Palm 14 00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:50,960 Speaker 1: Beach type people like gays dressed to the nines and 15 00:00:51,040 --> 00:00:54,440 Speaker 1: women in head to toe pink or lily pulser or florals. 16 00:00:54,440 --> 00:00:56,880 Speaker 1: And I'm like, what's going on. It's a weekday. I 17 00:00:56,880 --> 00:00:59,040 Speaker 1: think it was like a Tuesday, And I'm like, what 18 00:00:59,200 --> 00:01:01,680 Speaker 1: is happening? Clockla? Is this what goes on in pon Beach? 19 00:01:01,720 --> 00:01:04,200 Speaker 1: People are just coming here and having cocktails like this 20 00:01:04,280 --> 00:01:06,840 Speaker 1: is great? So I realized that there's like a game 21 00:01:06,959 --> 00:01:11,960 Speaker 1: night there, so lo and behold, Ramona Singer walks up 22 00:01:12,000 --> 00:01:16,319 Speaker 1: to me in a sleeveless matching set pants and a 23 00:01:16,400 --> 00:01:20,640 Speaker 1: tank and it's like head to toe so Ramona coated. 24 00:01:20,760 --> 00:01:23,040 Speaker 1: If it were Saint Bart's, it would be mack or Mae. 25 00:01:23,040 --> 00:01:25,000 Speaker 1: We're in pom Beach, so that she's wearing coral head 26 00:01:25,040 --> 00:01:29,000 Speaker 1: to toe. You have to always celebrate Ramona being Ramona, 27 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:33,440 Speaker 1: Like Ramona's the truest, most crystallized form of Ramona. I 28 00:01:33,520 --> 00:01:35,720 Speaker 1: happened to fall upon a video the other day where 29 00:01:35,760 --> 00:01:37,920 Speaker 1: she thought she was eating pistachios but she ate dog 30 00:01:37,959 --> 00:01:39,640 Speaker 1: food and she told us and I was like, I 31 00:01:39,800 --> 00:01:42,640 Speaker 1: love you chef's kiss. She has learned how to be 32 00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:45,280 Speaker 1: the most Ramona possible, and it's she is one of 33 00:01:45,319 --> 00:01:49,160 Speaker 1: the greatest housewives of all time because she brings the drama, 34 00:01:49,240 --> 00:01:53,560 Speaker 1: doesn't kill the party, and is just quintessentially Ramona. So 35 00:01:53,600 --> 00:01:56,200 Speaker 1: she walks in and it's like the most Ramona walks up. 36 00:01:56,280 --> 00:01:58,080 Speaker 1: You're just smiling, even if you hate her, and she 37 00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:01,040 Speaker 1: says the worst thing, you just have to appreciate it. 38 00:02:01,080 --> 00:02:03,000 Speaker 1: So she walks up, doesn't say the worst thing, she's 39 00:02:03,040 --> 00:02:06,960 Speaker 1: pleasant because I stand by the fact that housewives are 40 00:02:07,080 --> 00:02:10,639 Speaker 1: also just women. Yes, they're very desperate, they're very thirsty, 41 00:02:11,240 --> 00:02:14,360 Speaker 1: and you know they want it more than anything, but 42 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:17,160 Speaker 1: you wouldn't know that unless you were on a show 43 00:02:17,160 --> 00:02:19,200 Speaker 1: with them. Before Kelly ben Sima was on the show, 44 00:02:19,200 --> 00:02:20,680 Speaker 1: people are like, Oh, she was married to Gill ben 45 00:02:20,680 --> 00:02:22,640 Speaker 1: Simone and she goes to the fashion shows and she 46 00:02:22,639 --> 00:02:24,360 Speaker 1: seemed cheek. Then she comes on the show and she 47 00:02:24,400 --> 00:02:26,839 Speaker 1: seems like a fucking train wreck. Like half the rest 48 00:02:26,880 --> 00:02:29,839 Speaker 1: of us. People are like just people that you see 49 00:02:29,840 --> 00:02:32,840 Speaker 1: at cocktail parties. You have no understanding of how they interact, 50 00:02:33,200 --> 00:02:37,079 Speaker 1: how they flow. You just think they're this thing famous people, 51 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:39,120 Speaker 1: people who used to be big on television, Like they 52 00:02:39,120 --> 00:02:42,359 Speaker 1: come on reality television, then they seem like loser train wrecks. 53 00:02:42,800 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 1: So she walks up to me, We start talking. She 54 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:47,120 Speaker 1: tells me a couple little secrets about the show, which 55 00:02:47,160 --> 00:02:49,240 Speaker 1: I will not divulge, and I give her a little 56 00:02:49,240 --> 00:02:51,720 Speaker 1: bit of advice which I will not divulge, and concerns 57 00:02:51,720 --> 00:02:54,240 Speaker 1: that she has which I will not divulge. And then 58 00:02:54,520 --> 00:02:58,400 Speaker 1: I walk away, and then I see Sonya and I 59 00:02:58,440 --> 00:03:00,679 Speaker 1: assume they're there together, like they've just been living in 60 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:03,519 Speaker 1: a home together in pom Beach since the last time 61 00:03:03,560 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 1: I saw them or anything about them, And I'm like, 62 00:03:06,040 --> 00:03:08,560 Speaker 1: what the fuck and I go wait, she goes, no, 63 00:03:08,600 --> 00:03:10,440 Speaker 1: i haven't seen Ramona in months. I'm like, you've got 64 00:03:10,480 --> 00:03:12,640 Speaker 1: to fucking be kidding me right now. Of course, later 65 00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:15,080 Speaker 1: in the comments, people were like, oh, this is a 66 00:03:15,160 --> 00:03:16,800 Speaker 1: plan and you're going back to the show. I'm like, 67 00:03:16,960 --> 00:03:18,600 Speaker 1: there's no way that I showed up here at four 68 00:03:18,600 --> 00:03:21,280 Speaker 1: o'clock in the afternoon to have a margarita buy my 69 00:03:21,400 --> 00:03:24,360 Speaker 1: lonesome killing time. And I just saw Sonya and then 70 00:03:24,440 --> 00:03:26,560 Speaker 1: Ramona in the wild and they didn't know each other 71 00:03:26,680 --> 00:03:28,480 Speaker 1: was here, and they don't hang out, and they haven't 72 00:03:28,480 --> 00:03:31,080 Speaker 1: seen each other for a month. So I take Sonya 73 00:03:31,120 --> 00:03:33,359 Speaker 1: over to the table. Sonya is a whack of dude. 74 00:03:33,360 --> 00:03:35,800 Speaker 1: The thing she's saying half makes sense, like she's so 75 00:03:35,800 --> 00:03:40,080 Speaker 1: Sonya codd too, and she's like, I'm here all the time. 76 00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:42,040 Speaker 1: And Ramona separate, He's like, I'm here all the time, 77 00:03:42,080 --> 00:03:43,720 Speaker 1: and I'm just like, you guys are kidding. You both 78 00:03:43,720 --> 00:03:45,119 Speaker 1: say you're here all the time, but you've never seen 79 00:03:45,160 --> 00:03:47,280 Speaker 1: each other here. I am here none of the time. 80 00:03:47,320 --> 00:03:49,880 Speaker 1: I've never been here in my life. So I've been 81 00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:51,880 Speaker 1: to the hotel one time. I stayed there years ago, 82 00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:54,120 Speaker 1: but before it was a thing. So I'm like, Sonya 83 00:03:54,120 --> 00:03:56,680 Speaker 1: come over to Ramona, and Ramona like looks unbothered when 84 00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:58,600 Speaker 1: she sees her. And I said, well, and I have 85 00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:00,400 Speaker 1: to stir up the shit because that was me. I 86 00:04:00,440 --> 00:04:02,120 Speaker 1: always stirred up the shit, like I would always just 87 00:04:02,160 --> 00:04:04,760 Speaker 1: like know how to provoke them to be entertaining. And 88 00:04:04,840 --> 00:04:06,720 Speaker 1: I just pull out my phone because I just know that, 89 00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:09,480 Speaker 1: like I could capture something. There's something I forgot to 90 00:04:09,560 --> 00:04:11,760 Speaker 1: capture that I'll get with them on the commercial that 91 00:04:11,800 --> 00:04:14,240 Speaker 1: I'm doing with them that I suggested them for that 92 00:04:14,280 --> 00:04:17,840 Speaker 1: I'm now so excited about. So I said to Ramona, 93 00:04:17,880 --> 00:04:19,560 Speaker 1: I'm like Sonia says, she's here all the time, and 94 00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:21,600 Speaker 1: like you say, you're here all the time, but you've 95 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:23,960 Speaker 1: never seen Mama's Like, I have a table. I have 96 00:04:24,040 --> 00:04:27,840 Speaker 1: a standing table. This is my table. I have a table. 97 00:04:27,839 --> 00:04:29,240 Speaker 1: This is my table. I have a table. This is 98 00:04:29,279 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 1: my table. I have a standing table. I come here 99 00:04:31,000 --> 00:04:32,600 Speaker 1: every week. I live here, I was born here, I 100 00:04:32,640 --> 00:04:36,160 Speaker 1: will die here. I decorated it, I planned it, I 101 00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:40,080 Speaker 1: curated it. It's my menu, et cetera, and so like 102 00:04:40,160 --> 00:04:43,720 Speaker 1: it just was perfect all you need reality gold and 103 00:04:43,760 --> 00:04:45,920 Speaker 1: everyone in the comments when I posted it was like, literally, 104 00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:48,559 Speaker 1: this is better than any show that's been on since 105 00:04:48,600 --> 00:04:51,040 Speaker 1: you left, which I haven't seen, but so many people 106 00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:54,240 Speaker 1: said it. They're like, this is my life. This gave 107 00:04:54,360 --> 00:04:57,080 Speaker 1: me life, this healed the universe. Like it was just 108 00:04:57,760 --> 00:05:00,800 Speaker 1: that's the stuff I do miss. That's the part I 109 00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:02,640 Speaker 1: do miss. Like, honestly, I could do a show with 110 00:05:02,920 --> 00:05:06,640 Speaker 1: just myself, Ramona and Sonya and it would entertain you 111 00:05:06,720 --> 00:05:09,880 Speaker 1: all forever. But when people in the comments like she 112 00:05:09,960 --> 00:05:11,919 Speaker 1: wants to be back on the show so badly, I 113 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:14,880 Speaker 1: can promise you I can be back on the show 114 00:05:15,240 --> 00:05:17,599 Speaker 1: anytime I want. They will just have to pull the 115 00:05:17,600 --> 00:05:20,680 Speaker 1: Brinks truck up and get me enough money, which they 116 00:05:20,720 --> 00:05:23,600 Speaker 1: will not and do not have to do it, so 117 00:05:23,680 --> 00:05:25,680 Speaker 1: I will not be on your television screens. You will 118 00:05:25,720 --> 00:05:28,560 Speaker 1: have to have me here and on my social media 119 00:05:29,120 --> 00:05:31,400 Speaker 1: to get that. So I had a great time. I 120 00:05:31,440 --> 00:05:35,279 Speaker 1: was glad to see them and once again thrilled for them, 121 00:05:35,320 --> 00:05:37,799 Speaker 1: and I hope they hit it out of the park 122 00:05:37,880 --> 00:05:40,440 Speaker 1: and take the show into the end zone. And they 123 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:43,680 Speaker 1: did catch Bravo while they're sleeping. Because Bravo has never 124 00:05:43,680 --> 00:05:45,440 Speaker 1: really known how to take care of their talent. It's 125 00:05:45,480 --> 00:05:49,160 Speaker 1: sort of like a factory, and he seems to have 126 00:05:49,200 --> 00:05:51,599 Speaker 1: long standing talent that stays with them a very long time, 127 00:05:52,040 --> 00:05:53,840 Speaker 1: so it's not like as much of a revolving door 128 00:05:53,839 --> 00:05:55,440 Speaker 1: where you're in, you're out, you're in, you're out, you 129 00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:59,200 Speaker 1: bring you back. So congratulations to E and whoever versyint 130 00:05:59,279 --> 00:06:02,760 Speaker 1: is the company, the body that is now running this rodeo, 131 00:06:03,600 --> 00:06:05,919 Speaker 1: God only knows. Because Bravo can't afford to hold on 132 00:06:06,080 --> 00:06:08,080 Speaker 1: to all of their talent. They can't afford that kind 133 00:06:08,080 --> 00:06:10,080 Speaker 1: of money, so it's gonna be a little bit of 134 00:06:10,120 --> 00:06:11,920 Speaker 1: like a free for all, and they're gonna protect the 135 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:13,960 Speaker 1: realm and the talent that they do have on the 136 00:06:13,960 --> 00:06:18,440 Speaker 1: shows that do work, like it's their entire job. Yeah, 137 00:06:18,520 --> 00:06:36,480 Speaker 1: you're welcome. I want to applaud you who have raised 138 00:06:36,640 --> 00:06:41,240 Speaker 1: or have teen children. Everything they say about the nightmare 139 00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:46,120 Speaker 1: of this phase is true. So many fears are heightened now. 140 00:06:46,200 --> 00:06:49,400 Speaker 1: I feel like a selfish, entitled loser for talking about 141 00:06:49,400 --> 00:06:53,000 Speaker 1: this because I have one teenager. Okay, I've never really 142 00:06:53,000 --> 00:06:56,320 Speaker 1: had a nanny per se. I've always been home with 143 00:06:56,360 --> 00:06:59,360 Speaker 1: my kid now less, so I travel a little bit 144 00:06:59,360 --> 00:07:00,919 Speaker 1: more Now she's in her room doing her own thing, 145 00:07:00,960 --> 00:07:03,640 Speaker 1: she has her own plans. It's different, but like it 146 00:07:03,720 --> 00:07:07,840 Speaker 1: is a gnarly era for everyone. Okay, sometimes you know 147 00:07:07,880 --> 00:07:10,080 Speaker 1: you'd fantasize about being with them, but being with them 148 00:07:10,160 --> 00:07:12,640 Speaker 1: has a different meaning than it used to, like even 149 00:07:12,680 --> 00:07:15,080 Speaker 1: up till twelve thirteen. Like you're like, wait, there are people. 150 00:07:15,080 --> 00:07:16,880 Speaker 1: We can go out to dinner together. It's amazing. Like 151 00:07:16,920 --> 00:07:19,080 Speaker 1: as they get older, there's the rub about, like they 152 00:07:19,080 --> 00:07:21,400 Speaker 1: want to be with other kids or you're cool, you're 153 00:07:21,400 --> 00:07:22,680 Speaker 1: not cool, Like it's fun to be with you a 154 00:07:22,720 --> 00:07:24,200 Speaker 1: little bit, and my daughter likes to be with me 155 00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:26,280 Speaker 1: a lot. We spend a lot of time together, but 156 00:07:26,400 --> 00:07:28,200 Speaker 1: like we're not doing the same things we used to do. 157 00:07:28,240 --> 00:07:30,800 Speaker 1: We're not going to like you know, the pumpkin patch 158 00:07:30,920 --> 00:07:34,560 Speaker 1: or the balloon artist or you know, the same cutesy stuff. 159 00:07:34,600 --> 00:07:36,760 Speaker 1: We're not doing all those things you could just rely on, 160 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:41,120 Speaker 1: like the amusement park, the activity, the apple picking, like 161 00:07:41,120 --> 00:07:43,200 Speaker 1: you could, although she would go apple picking now, but 162 00:07:43,240 --> 00:07:45,960 Speaker 1: we don't. We're not. We're in Florida. But I'm just saying, 163 00:07:46,280 --> 00:07:48,480 Speaker 1: and you get a little Lazier when I was she 164 00:07:48,520 --> 00:07:50,520 Speaker 1: was a kid. I was the fucking sickest. I was 165 00:07:50,600 --> 00:07:53,760 Speaker 1: not the playground person. I would go there, I hated it. 166 00:07:54,520 --> 00:07:57,119 Speaker 1: I was the go to the ice cream making place. 167 00:07:57,240 --> 00:07:59,960 Speaker 1: I was the cupcake making place. I was the pump 168 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:03,520 Speaker 1: in picking. I was the apple picking. I was the 169 00:08:04,240 --> 00:08:08,360 Speaker 1: radio city, the fucking se Sanna. I was Macy's. I 170 00:08:08,520 --> 00:08:11,280 Speaker 1: was all those like organized activities. I was that. I 171 00:08:11,360 --> 00:08:13,840 Speaker 1: was great at that. Okay, I wasn't great at like 172 00:08:13,960 --> 00:08:15,840 Speaker 1: just going to the park and like the free range 173 00:08:15,960 --> 00:08:19,240 Speaker 1: toss the ball, but like this is a weird age 174 00:08:19,640 --> 00:08:23,000 Speaker 1: and shopping and eating can't be like the only activities. 175 00:08:23,040 --> 00:08:26,680 Speaker 1: And my daughter's very into school and like academics now, 176 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:29,080 Speaker 1: and I got to be honest. Also, I'm not the 177 00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:32,240 Speaker 1: great homework person. I literally don't know why I did 178 00:08:32,240 --> 00:08:33,960 Speaker 1: well on a you smarter than a fifth grader, because 179 00:08:33,960 --> 00:08:35,760 Speaker 1: I don't think that I am. And I got lucky, 180 00:08:36,040 --> 00:08:38,160 Speaker 1: Like I literally didn't know whether fifty two was the 181 00:08:38,200 --> 00:08:41,560 Speaker 1: number of cards or states. I was a stun deer, 182 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,200 Speaker 1: so I don't would not understand any of her homework 183 00:08:44,320 --> 00:08:46,760 Speaker 1: and even the way I was doing, like I think 184 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:48,840 Speaker 1: it was like long division or something was like they 185 00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:51,160 Speaker 1: do it differently now. So I was fucking her up 186 00:08:51,200 --> 00:08:54,640 Speaker 1: when I tried one time. I'm not it, like I'm 187 00:08:54,640 --> 00:08:56,800 Speaker 1: not like I'm good at like I'm going to pay 188 00:08:56,840 --> 00:08:58,640 Speaker 1: for the tutor and structure it and help you and 189 00:08:58,640 --> 00:09:00,720 Speaker 1: make the appointments and like want to say you'll for success, 190 00:09:00,760 --> 00:09:02,640 Speaker 1: but I'm not great at it. So this is an 191 00:09:02,720 --> 00:09:07,640 Speaker 1: age though, where you're dealing with such strong emotions, You're 192 00:09:07,679 --> 00:09:12,080 Speaker 1: dealing with such strong physical changes. You're dealing with insecurities 193 00:09:12,160 --> 00:09:17,320 Speaker 1: and hair and skin and being cool, and you're dealing 194 00:09:17,400 --> 00:09:24,800 Speaker 1: with like the hormonal like emotions that are irrational. You're 195 00:09:24,840 --> 00:09:27,800 Speaker 1: dealing with loving them so much and also fucking hating them. 196 00:09:28,120 --> 00:09:29,720 Speaker 1: And you have to talk to people you know, and 197 00:09:29,760 --> 00:09:32,240 Speaker 1: it's nice for once someone to be honest. It's not like, 198 00:09:32,280 --> 00:09:35,040 Speaker 1: oh yeah, no, not my Jane, she's going to Princeton. Like, 199 00:09:35,480 --> 00:09:37,120 Speaker 1: speak to someone whos being honest, you'd be like, my 200 00:09:37,200 --> 00:09:40,080 Speaker 1: fucking kid, nightmare like, and then you have a friend 201 00:09:40,160 --> 00:09:41,959 Speaker 1: is like she's such a fucking bitch. I can't stand it. 202 00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:44,200 Speaker 1: And it makes you feel like a warm blanket was 203 00:09:44,240 --> 00:09:47,760 Speaker 1: tossed over you after a marathon, like you're just feeling comfortable. 204 00:09:47,960 --> 00:09:49,640 Speaker 1: And then you'll say to the same person, she's being 205 00:09:49,640 --> 00:09:53,440 Speaker 1: great right now, it's a war zone, and then you like, 206 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:57,520 Speaker 1: because you're dealing with emotional issues, there's a gray area. 207 00:09:57,600 --> 00:10:00,199 Speaker 1: So let's say someone does something or acts out out 208 00:10:00,200 --> 00:10:03,280 Speaker 1: of emotion, but they do something that's not tolerated in 209 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:05,600 Speaker 1: your household and you're strict. So let's say you have 210 00:10:05,640 --> 00:10:08,160 Speaker 1: a kid who lied. Let's say it's a little kid. 211 00:10:08,160 --> 00:10:10,520 Speaker 1: I don't have a little kid who bites like. You 212 00:10:10,559 --> 00:10:13,080 Speaker 1: want to punish them because they bit like a four 213 00:10:13,200 --> 00:10:15,400 Speaker 1: year old or something, right, but they're biting from an 214 00:10:15,400 --> 00:10:18,720 Speaker 1: emotional reason. But biting is not acceptable, So you want 215 00:10:18,720 --> 00:10:20,800 Speaker 1: to discipline, but you don't know what discipline is right 216 00:10:20,800 --> 00:10:22,800 Speaker 1: because taking a phone away from someone who bit like 217 00:10:22,800 --> 00:10:25,720 Speaker 1: it's not going to cure the biting. So in teens 218 00:10:25,720 --> 00:10:29,320 Speaker 1: it's different. It could be like lying, they lied to you. 219 00:10:29,360 --> 00:10:32,400 Speaker 1: They lied, or they lashed out and did something, took 220 00:10:32,480 --> 00:10:33,960 Speaker 1: something out of your closet, or I don't know what, 221 00:10:34,120 --> 00:10:37,040 Speaker 1: they did something that was not acceptable, but it was 222 00:10:37,040 --> 00:10:39,920 Speaker 1: from an emotional reason. It could be really bad that 223 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,480 Speaker 1: needs to be dealt with. So the problem is you're 224 00:10:42,520 --> 00:10:46,480 Speaker 1: trying to discipline, but you're disciplining something that is frankly emotional. 225 00:10:46,559 --> 00:10:49,360 Speaker 1: So it's like a very fine line in deciding how 226 00:10:49,360 --> 00:10:51,760 Speaker 1: to do it because you're kind of almost just disciplining 227 00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:54,800 Speaker 1: to make yourself feel better, Like you're not curing an 228 00:10:54,800 --> 00:10:58,320 Speaker 1: emotional issue by just disciplining right and wrong. You have 229 00:10:58,360 --> 00:10:59,880 Speaker 1: to kind of get under the hood of the emotion 230 00:11:00,200 --> 00:11:03,559 Speaker 1: and be there to support, but not be a pushover 231 00:11:03,800 --> 00:11:05,960 Speaker 1: that's going to emotionally support and ignore the fact that 232 00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:09,400 Speaker 1: that is not acceptable. So, like, I realized that there 233 00:11:09,440 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: was something that wasn't acceptable. So my approach, which was 234 00:11:12,600 --> 00:11:15,640 Speaker 1: validated by this therapist, was like, yes, you set boundaries 235 00:11:15,679 --> 00:11:18,920 Speaker 1: like this is unacceptable, this is nipped in the bud 236 00:11:19,000 --> 00:11:21,680 Speaker 1: right now, this is unacceptable. These are the consequences. But 237 00:11:22,000 --> 00:11:24,719 Speaker 1: you can always come to me, and I'm always here 238 00:11:24,760 --> 00:11:26,320 Speaker 1: to discuss this with you. And I want to know 239 00:11:26,400 --> 00:11:28,560 Speaker 1: when you're ready, like how you're feeling about this, and 240 00:11:28,679 --> 00:11:30,840 Speaker 1: dip back into it, because you're not going to like 241 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:34,880 Speaker 1: approach something emotional from when someone's heightened and we've just 242 00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:37,280 Speaker 1: had a hysterical situation. They don't want to be like, hey, 243 00:11:37,360 --> 00:11:39,640 Speaker 1: let's talk, but you kind of talk, you know, when 244 00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:41,520 Speaker 1: someone's taking a bath or you're making a meal, or 245 00:11:41,520 --> 00:11:43,560 Speaker 1: you're in a car, or you're out to dinner, So 246 00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:45,440 Speaker 1: you have to find your way back into the emotion. 247 00:11:45,559 --> 00:11:48,640 Speaker 1: You have to set the boundaries of the discipline. But 248 00:11:48,720 --> 00:11:52,720 Speaker 1: it's just a different time. Like if I steal at 249 00:11:52,800 --> 00:11:56,120 Speaker 1: work now as an adult, like I'm getting fired, that's 250 00:11:56,160 --> 00:11:59,480 Speaker 1: a consequence. But if I steal at school at fifteen, 251 00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:02,200 Speaker 1: which my daughter's not stealing at school, or you know, 252 00:12:02,240 --> 00:12:06,040 Speaker 1: I'm giving a complete random example, there might be a 253 00:12:06,080 --> 00:12:09,240 Speaker 1: different reason behind it. Yes, there's a reason behind it 254 00:12:09,280 --> 00:12:12,520 Speaker 1: as an adult, but tough shit. You know, people lie, cheat, steal, 255 00:12:12,559 --> 00:12:15,680 Speaker 1: and kill people because of emotional reasons. We're not able 256 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:18,040 Speaker 1: to deal with that at a job. Your boss isn't 257 00:12:18,040 --> 00:12:20,120 Speaker 1: gonna be like, yeah, you stole or you know, you 258 00:12:20,200 --> 00:12:22,280 Speaker 1: poked someone with a pen at work and your cubicle. 259 00:12:22,760 --> 00:12:24,559 Speaker 1: Let's talk about it. Like there's kind of no talk 260 00:12:24,600 --> 00:12:29,240 Speaker 1: about it as an adult. So hopefully we're raising teens 261 00:12:29,760 --> 00:12:33,040 Speaker 1: and dealing with their emotions so that we don't get 262 00:12:33,040 --> 00:12:35,000 Speaker 1: to the point where they're stabbing someone with a pencil 263 00:12:35,040 --> 00:12:37,000 Speaker 1: and a cubicle as an adult. I don't know if 264 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:38,960 Speaker 1: this makes sense. I'm just saying, like, you're like molding 265 00:12:39,040 --> 00:12:42,280 Speaker 1: human beings navigating a time and you're trying to set 266 00:12:42,320 --> 00:12:46,400 Speaker 1: boundaries while also deal with them emotionally. So I find 267 00:12:46,440 --> 00:12:48,400 Speaker 1: it to be a very challenging time. And people say, 268 00:12:48,480 --> 00:12:50,719 Speaker 1: and then we're going to get into like drinking, We're 269 00:12:50,720 --> 00:12:54,920 Speaker 1: getting into drugs, We're getting into eating, We're getting into 270 00:12:54,960 --> 00:12:58,160 Speaker 1: body image, We're getting into Instagram, we're getting into TikTok 271 00:12:58,200 --> 00:13:00,600 Speaker 1: and how much people are on social media and influences, 272 00:13:01,080 --> 00:13:03,480 Speaker 1: and we're getting into that being their main source of 273 00:13:03,559 --> 00:13:08,760 Speaker 1: like absorption, with politics, with health, with everything. We're getting 274 00:13:08,800 --> 00:13:11,160 Speaker 1: into their relationships. Who are they choosing? How are we 275 00:13:11,240 --> 00:13:14,360 Speaker 1: describing who they should choose? By example, are you dating 276 00:13:14,360 --> 00:13:16,720 Speaker 1: someone who's an abuser, who's a smoker, who's a drinker, 277 00:13:16,720 --> 00:13:19,000 Speaker 1: who's a cutter, And then you're expecting your kids to 278 00:13:19,040 --> 00:13:21,240 Speaker 1: do something different than you are at home? Are you 279 00:13:21,360 --> 00:13:23,640 Speaker 1: in a relationship with an abuser because you can't afford 280 00:13:23,679 --> 00:13:25,560 Speaker 1: to get out of one? But that's still the model 281 00:13:25,600 --> 00:13:29,560 Speaker 1: they're seeing. Is their parent absent or not absent? And 282 00:13:30,120 --> 00:13:33,120 Speaker 1: is that you know, molding who they're going to or 283 00:13:33,160 --> 00:13:35,880 Speaker 1: not going to date or look for Are you intervening 284 00:13:35,920 --> 00:13:38,320 Speaker 1: in that? Do you have an absentee parent who made 285 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:41,480 Speaker 1: your kid feel abandoned or not wanted, And how is 286 00:13:41,480 --> 00:13:44,560 Speaker 1: that affecting them in their body image and their self 287 00:13:44,679 --> 00:13:48,160 Speaker 1: esteem and in who they choose. Are you able to 288 00:13:48,200 --> 00:13:50,199 Speaker 1: like let them know to choose someone who's going to 289 00:13:50,240 --> 00:13:53,520 Speaker 1: treat them really well because they could like someone or 290 00:13:53,600 --> 00:13:56,600 Speaker 1: not like someone in school based on if they're hard 291 00:13:56,640 --> 00:13:59,280 Speaker 1: to get or not. And then you're like, Okay, well 292 00:13:59,320 --> 00:14:01,520 Speaker 1: when they get with another girl, then they're gonna be 293 00:14:01,520 --> 00:14:03,840 Speaker 1: hard to get and you missed your opportunity because you're 294 00:14:03,880 --> 00:14:06,200 Speaker 1: being superficial about it. You know, you're trying to like 295 00:14:06,240 --> 00:14:09,920 Speaker 1: talk to them using your institutional knowledge as an adult 296 00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,000 Speaker 1: who went through all this shit and make them better 297 00:14:12,040 --> 00:14:16,280 Speaker 1: than you were. It's really an interesting time. And then 298 00:14:16,320 --> 00:14:19,600 Speaker 1: they're gonna start driving, and you're like, now you're driving, 299 00:14:19,720 --> 00:14:22,360 Speaker 1: and you're are you scattered? Are you organized? Are you 300 00:14:22,360 --> 00:14:24,840 Speaker 1: a know it all? Do you like not take constructive 301 00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:28,320 Speaker 1: criticism about how to operate a vehicle? Do you have 302 00:14:28,360 --> 00:14:30,960 Speaker 1: good judgment? Do you know never to get into a 303 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 1: car after a sip of alcohol? Do you know never 304 00:14:34,440 --> 00:14:36,640 Speaker 1: to get into another person's car or let them drive? 305 00:14:36,680 --> 00:14:39,120 Speaker 1: Do you know to intervene and to get a new 306 00:14:39,160 --> 00:14:40,560 Speaker 1: or ber to call your parent in the middle of 307 00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:43,400 Speaker 1: the night, like you're battling a lot. It's a very 308 00:14:43,400 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: hard time, and I'm up for the task, but like 309 00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:48,960 Speaker 1: I'm on it. And there's an age when like you're 310 00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: not calling parents like they're going to a party, their 311 00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:54,200 Speaker 1: friend is driving them. You're not like calling the parent 312 00:14:54,280 --> 00:14:57,280 Speaker 1: of a sixteen year old, Hey, hey, I know they 313 00:14:57,280 --> 00:14:59,920 Speaker 1: want to have a play date, like they're young adults. 314 00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:03,240 Speaker 1: So now you're trying to actually operate and find out 315 00:15:03,240 --> 00:15:06,360 Speaker 1: where they are when they might have a tracking device 316 00:15:06,360 --> 00:15:07,880 Speaker 1: on their phone, but they're throwing it into the bushes 317 00:15:07,880 --> 00:15:10,720 Speaker 1: like they're not stupid. So I find it to be 318 00:15:11,000 --> 00:15:13,560 Speaker 1: extremely intense to navigate