1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:02,519 Speaker 1: So if you want to live a fulfilled life, part 2 00:00:02,520 --> 00:00:04,960 Speaker 1: of that is wrestling with the hard questions in life, 3 00:00:05,600 --> 00:00:08,160 Speaker 1: like what is your purpose? And if that feels too 4 00:00:08,160 --> 00:00:10,240 Speaker 1: big right now, no problem, thin slice it like what's 5 00:00:10,240 --> 00:00:11,760 Speaker 1: your purpose today? What's your purpose? 6 00:00:11,800 --> 00:00:23,560 Speaker 2: This week? 7 00:00:27,120 --> 00:00:30,720 Speaker 3: Another week, another Hurdle. Hey everyone, Emily a body here. 8 00:00:30,880 --> 00:00:33,800 Speaker 3: You are listening to episode three hundred and fifty three 9 00:00:34,240 --> 00:00:37,320 Speaker 3: of Hurdle, a wellness focused podcast where we talk to 10 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:41,279 Speaker 3: inspirational people about everything from their highest tides and toughest. 11 00:00:40,920 --> 00:00:43,160 Speaker 4: Moments to essential tips on. 12 00:00:43,080 --> 00:00:47,159 Speaker 3: How to live a healthier, happier, more motivated life. We 13 00:00:47,240 --> 00:00:50,480 Speaker 3: all go through our fair share of hurdles. My goal 14 00:00:50,560 --> 00:00:53,479 Speaker 3: through these discussions is to empower you to better navigate 15 00:00:53,479 --> 00:00:56,560 Speaker 3: yours and move with intention so that you can stride 16 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:58,760 Speaker 3: towards your own big potential. 17 00:00:58,560 --> 00:01:02,600 Speaker 4: And of course have some fun along the way. 18 00:01:03,440 --> 00:01:07,600 Speaker 3: For today's episode, I am excited to bring back to 19 00:01:07,640 --> 00:01:11,600 Speaker 3: the feed one of my favorite conversations from twenty twenty one, 20 00:01:11,760 --> 00:01:15,479 Speaker 3: and that is with doctor Michael Gervai. He's a high 21 00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:21,440 Speaker 3: performance psychologist. He's also the host of the Finding Mastery podcast. 22 00:01:21,560 --> 00:01:23,240 Speaker 3: He's worked to some of the best of the best 23 00:01:23,280 --> 00:01:25,800 Speaker 3: to help them master their mind and better their craft. 24 00:01:25,800 --> 00:01:28,160 Speaker 3: In today's episode, we talked about how he got to 25 00:01:28,200 --> 00:01:31,280 Speaker 3: where he is today. He tells me about his experience 26 00:01:31,319 --> 00:01:34,240 Speaker 3: surfing growing up and how that actually led him to 27 00:01:34,560 --> 00:01:38,959 Speaker 3: become more interested in the mind. Plus he dives into 28 00:01:39,200 --> 00:01:43,080 Speaker 3: a very memorable hurdle moment that really instilled in him 29 00:01:43,319 --> 00:01:47,480 Speaker 3: how to keep showing up during difficult moments. And I 30 00:01:47,560 --> 00:01:50,360 Speaker 3: really appreciate so many of his takeaways that he offers 31 00:01:50,440 --> 00:01:55,360 Speaker 3: about how to decipher our purpose, articulate your personal philosophy, 32 00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:59,600 Speaker 3: and separate the two different types of thought. Again, this 33 00:01:59,680 --> 00:02:04,200 Speaker 3: converse originally from twenty twenty one, but it's so chocked 34 00:02:04,240 --> 00:02:05,600 Speaker 3: full of goodness that I know that we have so 35 00:02:05,680 --> 00:02:09,360 Speaker 3: many new listeners around the hurdle sphere. I've never used 36 00:02:09,400 --> 00:02:11,760 Speaker 3: that word before, but today it feels fitting that I 37 00:02:11,760 --> 00:02:14,000 Speaker 3: wanted to bring it back to the top of the 38 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:18,040 Speaker 3: feed now. Of note, doctor Gervais works with some of 39 00:02:18,080 --> 00:02:19,560 Speaker 3: the best to ever do it. 40 00:02:19,639 --> 00:02:23,680 Speaker 4: Within sport, the mind is such an important piece of. 41 00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:28,440 Speaker 3: The puzzle when it comes to performance and you know, going. 42 00:02:28,280 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 4: About your day to day. 43 00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:33,400 Speaker 3: So when we think about wellness, when we think about 44 00:02:33,480 --> 00:02:37,680 Speaker 3: wellness within sport, there is no conversation. 45 00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:39,920 Speaker 4: That does not include the mind. 46 00:02:40,200 --> 00:02:42,880 Speaker 3: Make sure you are following along with Hurdle over on 47 00:02:42,919 --> 00:02:45,760 Speaker 3: social It's at Hurdle podcast. I am over at Emily 48 00:02:45,919 --> 00:02:48,480 Speaker 3: a Body And if you're not yet subscribed to the 49 00:02:48,520 --> 00:02:51,880 Speaker 3: weekly Hurdle newsletter, get that, get on that. The link 50 00:02:51,919 --> 00:02:55,480 Speaker 3: to subscribe, landing directly in your inbox every single Friday 51 00:02:55,840 --> 00:02:59,440 Speaker 3: is in the show notes. Plus, we're also really active 52 00:02:59,480 --> 00:03:03,480 Speaker 3: on Instagram. I have a daily subscriber channel that I 53 00:03:03,639 --> 00:03:11,280 Speaker 3: am populating with good inspirational notes, well wishes, helpful thoughts. 54 00:03:12,639 --> 00:03:16,119 Speaker 3: Trust me, you want in and you can get in 55 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:18,959 Speaker 3: by clicking a link in the show notes. 56 00:03:19,240 --> 00:03:22,679 Speaker 4: With that, let's get to it, Let's get to hurd link. 57 00:03:28,040 --> 00:03:31,600 Speaker 3: Today, I am sitting down with doctor Michael Jervai. He 58 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:36,640 Speaker 3: is a high performance psychologist and also the host of 59 00:03:36,720 --> 00:03:39,760 Speaker 3: the Finding Mastery podcast. How are you doing today? 60 00:03:40,480 --> 00:03:44,000 Speaker 1: Fantastic? Thank you for including me in your community in 61 00:03:44,000 --> 00:03:44,640 Speaker 1: this conversation. 62 00:03:45,360 --> 00:03:47,800 Speaker 3: I'm so excited to do it. I don't think that 63 00:03:47,920 --> 00:03:51,280 Speaker 3: being a performance psychologist is probably one of those careers 64 00:03:51,320 --> 00:03:53,360 Speaker 3: that as a young boy you're like, you know what 65 00:03:53,360 --> 00:03:55,160 Speaker 3: I'm going to do when I grow up, I'm going 66 00:03:55,200 --> 00:03:59,080 Speaker 3: to be a performance psychologist. So as I always like 67 00:03:59,120 --> 00:04:01,160 Speaker 3: to do on the show me off with talking to 68 00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:03,320 Speaker 3: me a little bit about your upbringing. 69 00:04:04,600 --> 00:04:07,560 Speaker 1: When I was young, there was no such industry as 70 00:04:07,960 --> 00:04:11,440 Speaker 1: sport and performance psychology. So I grew up for the 71 00:04:11,480 --> 00:04:15,400 Speaker 1: first handful of years in a remote town in Virginia, 72 00:04:16,720 --> 00:04:20,880 Speaker 1: no street lights, dirt roads, Gravel was a luxury on 73 00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:23,240 Speaker 1: the roads. And so we're way back. My parents kind 74 00:04:23,240 --> 00:04:26,280 Speaker 1: of dropped out, if you will, and wanted to build 75 00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:29,760 Speaker 1: their family on a farm. And this was not a 76 00:04:29,800 --> 00:04:32,600 Speaker 1: luxury farm. This is like running water was the luxury. 77 00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:36,080 Speaker 1: And so at a young age, like the things that 78 00:04:36,160 --> 00:04:38,920 Speaker 1: I was thinking about is I had to be home 79 00:04:38,960 --> 00:04:42,360 Speaker 1: by dark because mother Nature was a whole different animal 80 00:04:42,400 --> 00:04:45,080 Speaker 1: at night. And this is like at age eight and nine, 81 00:04:45,279 --> 00:04:49,040 Speaker 1: and so was I learned so much from the roots 82 00:04:49,120 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 1: of being connected with nature as a young kid. And 83 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:55,520 Speaker 1: then I think my dad said enough of this, and 84 00:04:55,560 --> 00:05:00,080 Speaker 1: he came to California when I was it's called fourth grade, 85 00:05:00,400 --> 00:05:04,200 Speaker 1: and came to California and said, Okay, let's do something 86 00:05:04,240 --> 00:05:07,680 Speaker 1: a little bit more sophisticated. And so not that there's 87 00:05:07,680 --> 00:05:10,120 Speaker 1: anything wrong with dropping out and you know, building a 88 00:05:10,160 --> 00:05:11,920 Speaker 1: life on a farm. And so he got a corporate job, 89 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:15,119 Speaker 1: if you will, in Sales. I was thrust it into 90 00:05:15,200 --> 00:05:19,680 Speaker 1: the city life and I didn't quite fit in with 91 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:27,000 Speaker 1: traditional stick and ball sports. And so again I was like, okay, well, 92 00:05:27,240 --> 00:05:29,360 Speaker 1: what is the thing that I'm more interested in? Because 93 00:05:29,360 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 1: I came from this natural world and mother nature and 94 00:05:31,920 --> 00:05:36,120 Speaker 1: all that stuff, and so I was naturally attracted to 95 00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:42,800 Speaker 1: action sports. And so action sports in California are like surfing, skateboarding, motocross, BMX, 96 00:05:42,839 --> 00:05:46,400 Speaker 1: like that stuff where there's some connection to mother nature. 97 00:05:46,440 --> 00:05:50,880 Speaker 1: But the real deeper connection was there wasn't a set 98 00:05:50,920 --> 00:05:55,039 Speaker 1: of arbitrary rules and artificial coaching, and it just was 99 00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:56,920 Speaker 1: pure because if you made a mistake, you'd leave a 100 00:05:56,920 --> 00:05:59,400 Speaker 1: little skin on the asphalt. If you made a mistake, 101 00:05:59,480 --> 00:06:02,279 Speaker 1: you get help under you know, a wave longer than 102 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:05,279 Speaker 1: you know you thought you could do. And so there's 103 00:06:05,320 --> 00:06:10,160 Speaker 1: a real tolerance for risk taking slash material consequences when 104 00:06:10,200 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 1: you make a mistake. And there wasn't these adults hovering over, 105 00:06:13,720 --> 00:06:15,920 Speaker 1: you know, yelling and shouting, and I thought, as a kid, 106 00:06:16,040 --> 00:06:19,960 Speaker 1: like this is weird. This is really bizarre. And so 107 00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,680 Speaker 1: what ended up bringing me to sports psychology though, was 108 00:06:24,720 --> 00:06:27,200 Speaker 1: in surfing. There's two types of surfing. There's free surfing 109 00:06:27,600 --> 00:06:30,880 Speaker 1: and competitive surfing and free surfing is like what you 110 00:06:30,960 --> 00:06:34,200 Speaker 1: do with you know. I say this in a in 111 00:06:34,240 --> 00:06:37,360 Speaker 1: a gender biased way, because we didn't I didn't know 112 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:38,920 Speaker 1: any females that were surfing. But what you do with 113 00:06:38,960 --> 00:06:42,880 Speaker 1: the boys and and free surfing, I could do it. 114 00:06:42,880 --> 00:06:45,200 Speaker 1: I could get it done. It was awesome. No one's looking. 115 00:06:45,360 --> 00:06:48,240 Speaker 1: You just kind of go into the scariest part of 116 00:06:48,360 --> 00:06:50,440 Speaker 1: the heaviest part of a wave, and you don't tell 117 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,520 Speaker 1: anyone about it. You experience it. But then come competition, 118 00:06:54,880 --> 00:06:56,920 Speaker 1: when there's people on the beach and there's judges and 119 00:06:56,960 --> 00:07:00,200 Speaker 1: family and friends, and there's people scoring and critiquing. I 120 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:04,640 Speaker 1: was a disaster. So I didn't have the psychology to 121 00:07:04,720 --> 00:07:08,240 Speaker 1: take what I could do into a moment that became 122 00:07:08,279 --> 00:07:11,240 Speaker 1: too big for me, which was a competition. And that's 123 00:07:11,280 --> 00:07:15,440 Speaker 1: where a competitor said to me one day, Adervai, I 124 00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:17,240 Speaker 1: serve with you every day. He was older than me. 125 00:07:18,120 --> 00:07:19,920 Speaker 1: I serve with you every day. You should be mopping 126 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:23,280 Speaker 1: up everybody out here. But you got to stop thinking 127 00:07:23,280 --> 00:07:27,320 Speaker 1: about what could go wrong. I thought, how does he know? 128 00:07:27,880 --> 00:07:30,000 Speaker 1: How does he know what's in mind? You know, that's 129 00:07:30,040 --> 00:07:32,320 Speaker 1: all I'm thinking about. All the things that could go wrong, 130 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,200 Speaker 1: and then he paddled off. You know, he beat me 131 00:07:35,240 --> 00:07:37,720 Speaker 1: in that heat because now he's in my head. But 132 00:07:37,800 --> 00:07:43,360 Speaker 1: what I figured out was that I could use my mind. 133 00:07:43,040 --> 00:07:45,040 Speaker 1: I could there's a way that I could use my 134 00:07:45,080 --> 00:07:46,800 Speaker 1: mind to help me do what I wanted to do. 135 00:07:47,720 --> 00:07:52,840 Speaker 1: And I wasn't and so I didn't know what psychology was. 136 00:07:53,000 --> 00:07:55,800 Speaker 1: As fifteen years old, I didn't know what it was. 137 00:07:56,640 --> 00:08:00,480 Speaker 1: And long story, getting a little bit shorter here is 138 00:08:00,520 --> 00:08:05,280 Speaker 1: that I fell in love when I got to college. 139 00:08:05,320 --> 00:08:08,120 Speaker 1: Eventually got to college, that's a whole different story. But 140 00:08:08,240 --> 00:08:11,240 Speaker 1: I fell in love with the world of the invisible, 141 00:08:12,320 --> 00:08:14,520 Speaker 1: and I didn't know anybody in my family that went 142 00:08:14,520 --> 00:08:17,160 Speaker 1: to college. I certainly didn't know anyone that had a PhD. 143 00:08:18,040 --> 00:08:21,960 Speaker 1: And so what accidentally happened is three professors, and I 144 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:24,920 Speaker 1: love bringing up their names, if you allow me, please, 145 00:08:25,520 --> 00:08:30,600 Speaker 1: doctor Zenka, doctor Perkins, and doctor Cuzio, a philosopher, a theologian, 146 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:34,920 Speaker 1: and a psychologist. And they were best friends, Zenka and 147 00:08:35,040 --> 00:08:40,640 Speaker 1: Cuzio and Perkins. So they were best buds. And they 148 00:08:40,760 --> 00:08:44,280 Speaker 1: saw me coming like this, you know, full of energy, 149 00:08:44,360 --> 00:08:48,760 Speaker 1: but clueless kid that had no real direction and all 150 00:08:48,800 --> 00:08:52,920 Speaker 1: he wanted to do was break rules and be counterculture 151 00:08:53,200 --> 00:08:56,960 Speaker 1: and quote unquote get after it in life. I didn't 152 00:08:56,960 --> 00:08:58,760 Speaker 1: know what that really meant, but they saw that coming in. 153 00:08:58,800 --> 00:09:01,680 Speaker 1: They said, hey, listen, let me introduce you to this 154 00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:05,200 Speaker 1: beautiful world of the invisible. And it lit me on 155 00:09:05,240 --> 00:09:07,080 Speaker 1: fire and set me down this path that I just 156 00:09:07,120 --> 00:09:08,840 Speaker 1: wanted to learn more and more and more and more. 157 00:09:08,880 --> 00:09:10,000 Speaker 1: And that's kind of how it happened. 158 00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:15,960 Speaker 3: Talk to me about the reference to eventually getting to college. 159 00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:22,439 Speaker 1: High school was an adventure and so yeah, I mean 160 00:09:22,520 --> 00:09:25,680 Speaker 1: I had a lot of fun. I didn't take school seriously. 161 00:09:26,080 --> 00:09:32,040 Speaker 1: I was in the water a lot, surfing, and you know, 162 00:09:32,080 --> 00:09:34,000 Speaker 1: I got it. Was my senior year in high school. 163 00:09:34,000 --> 00:09:37,000 Speaker 1: My parents pulled me aside and it was a you know, 164 00:09:37,000 --> 00:09:41,040 Speaker 1: southern California, a beautiful sunny day, and my mom says, hey, 165 00:09:41,080 --> 00:09:43,280 Speaker 1: we tried because they didn't go to college, you know, 166 00:09:43,360 --> 00:09:47,480 Speaker 1: but hey, we tried, and you got a zero on 167 00:09:47,520 --> 00:09:50,800 Speaker 1: your p SAT. You got a zero on your SAT 168 00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:54,360 Speaker 1: and it's because I ditched them. I went surfing. And 169 00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:56,920 Speaker 1: they said, you've got a choice to make now. Either 170 00:09:56,920 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 1: you got to get a job and get out, or 171 00:10:00,120 --> 00:10:03,160 Speaker 1: you can go to community college and you can stay 172 00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:06,520 Speaker 1: here and I was like community college. Wait, these are 173 00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:09,160 Speaker 1: bad choices. I'm not ready to kind of go become 174 00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,560 Speaker 1: self sufficient. I'm not ready for that. But I know 175 00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:14,280 Speaker 1: how to actually go to school, play the game a 176 00:10:14,280 --> 00:10:16,679 Speaker 1: little bit and keep surfing. So let me just do that. 177 00:10:17,240 --> 00:10:20,679 Speaker 1: And that's accidentally how I got into college, and it 178 00:10:20,720 --> 00:10:23,800 Speaker 1: was never part of the design. And so I mean, 179 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:27,520 Speaker 1: I'll spare some of the details, but college was meaningful. 180 00:10:27,640 --> 00:10:28,480 Speaker 1: High school was fun. 181 00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:33,600 Speaker 3: Got it? When your learning starts to get meaningful, talk 182 00:10:33,640 --> 00:10:37,520 Speaker 3: to me about kind of the switch of gears that 183 00:10:37,640 --> 00:10:41,040 Speaker 3: must happen in your head, because as someone again, high 184 00:10:41,080 --> 00:10:45,080 Speaker 3: school was fun, I can't imagine that until you really 185 00:10:45,120 --> 00:10:47,959 Speaker 3: started to think to yourself like, wow, I'm actually really 186 00:10:48,000 --> 00:10:51,880 Speaker 3: interested in this material and understand that you could do 187 00:10:51,960 --> 00:10:55,920 Speaker 3: something with that material. Did that experience become something that 188 00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:57,679 Speaker 3: to you felt worthwhile? 189 00:10:58,559 --> 00:11:02,240 Speaker 1: Well, right, look at pop psychology. You'll read things or 190 00:11:02,360 --> 00:11:04,720 Speaker 1: hear about things like you got to have a vision 191 00:11:04,760 --> 00:11:07,800 Speaker 1: in your life, And I will talk about the science 192 00:11:07,800 --> 00:11:10,040 Speaker 1: and the art of vision, because there's some important stuff 193 00:11:10,080 --> 00:11:12,520 Speaker 1: there and you got to have big goals and audacious whatever. 194 00:11:13,200 --> 00:11:16,320 Speaker 1: I don't know, I know the science there, but that 195 00:11:16,400 --> 00:11:18,600 Speaker 1: was not true for me. What was true for me 196 00:11:18,960 --> 00:11:23,000 Speaker 1: is that I was in conversation and reading things that 197 00:11:23,280 --> 00:11:26,760 Speaker 1: were illuminating, and I never thought that if I read 198 00:11:26,760 --> 00:11:29,480 Speaker 1: this book later one day, maybe I wanted to read 199 00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,439 Speaker 1: this book and understand it so I could run back 200 00:11:31,440 --> 00:11:33,920 Speaker 1: and have a conversation with somebody who really understood it, 201 00:11:33,920 --> 00:11:36,079 Speaker 1: the professor or the other kids in the class that 202 00:11:36,120 --> 00:11:39,040 Speaker 1: were trying to wrestle with it, because it lit me up, 203 00:11:40,000 --> 00:11:43,120 Speaker 1: and so it was never for later. It was for 204 00:11:43,200 --> 00:11:45,560 Speaker 1: the purity of it. And that's actually what action sports 205 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:48,760 Speaker 1: will teach you, is that if you're not completely absorbed 206 00:11:48,800 --> 00:11:52,840 Speaker 1: and present here now, the consequences are too great. So like, 207 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:55,520 Speaker 1: be about it and then let me pull back one 208 00:11:55,520 --> 00:11:58,560 Speaker 1: more layer. I think this is materially important in where 209 00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:02,880 Speaker 1: we might go in this conversation. Is that when I 210 00:12:02,920 --> 00:12:07,240 Speaker 1: would walk from school to home and we lived next 211 00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:10,000 Speaker 1: to the ocean, I would walk I've never talked to 212 00:12:10,000 --> 00:12:12,320 Speaker 1: anyone about this, but I would walk down the street 213 00:12:12,400 --> 00:12:15,320 Speaker 1: and I'd look at a hedge and as I'm walking, 214 00:12:15,400 --> 00:12:17,040 Speaker 1: I'm looking at the hedge, like how I'm going to 215 00:12:17,120 --> 00:12:19,640 Speaker 1: surf off that hedge as if it was a real wave. 216 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:23,240 Speaker 1: I was obsessed with trying to get better to ready 217 00:12:23,280 --> 00:12:26,800 Speaker 1: myself for the next challenge, because the next challenge, if 218 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:31,320 Speaker 1: I really push myself, could be dangerous. And so the 219 00:12:31,320 --> 00:12:35,360 Speaker 1: same was true in school. I was readying myself to 220 00:12:35,440 --> 00:12:38,960 Speaker 1: understand it better, but not for later. Really, it was 221 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,840 Speaker 1: because I loved what the way it felt to get better. 222 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:47,240 Speaker 1: And so so anyways, that's kind of the obsession that 223 00:12:47,280 --> 00:12:50,959 Speaker 1: sometimes I think is required that I don't wish really 224 00:12:51,000 --> 00:12:51,480 Speaker 1: on people. 225 00:12:51,720 --> 00:12:55,960 Speaker 3: Let's talk a little bit about that concept of visioning 226 00:12:56,240 --> 00:13:01,200 Speaker 3: and of thinking about or picturing where it is that 227 00:13:01,240 --> 00:13:04,280 Speaker 3: you think you could go or what you would do. 228 00:13:04,679 --> 00:13:08,920 Speaker 3: For so many people, they can think those things, but then, 229 00:13:09,320 --> 00:13:12,520 Speaker 3: as I'm sure you've experienced in your work and in 230 00:13:12,559 --> 00:13:18,160 Speaker 3: your conversations, there can be a large disconnect between thinking 231 00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:21,280 Speaker 3: about it and then actually like thinking about how you 232 00:13:21,320 --> 00:13:25,680 Speaker 3: can make that thing that you're thinking about happen right on. 233 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:30,720 Speaker 1: And I I just want to I want to remind people. 234 00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:35,240 Speaker 1: So I've studied, you know, to the edges of psychology 235 00:13:35,280 --> 00:13:39,520 Speaker 1: and the psychology of excellence, like how the extraordinaries work 236 00:13:39,960 --> 00:13:45,120 Speaker 1: from a rigor of research and academic you know, training, 237 00:13:45,200 --> 00:13:48,400 Speaker 1: as well as being in the amphitheater in some of 238 00:13:48,440 --> 00:13:52,000 Speaker 1: the most extraordinary you know organizations. I'd love to tell 239 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:54,760 Speaker 1: some of those stories, but I just want to remind 240 00:13:54,840 --> 00:13:58,280 Speaker 1: or kind of level set that I don't know. I 241 00:13:58,280 --> 00:14:02,640 Speaker 1: think people are struggling in life right now. I know 242 00:14:02,760 --> 00:14:05,360 Speaker 1: that to be true. And just because you don't know 243 00:14:05,400 --> 00:14:07,840 Speaker 1: exactly what you want your future to be right now, 244 00:14:07,880 --> 00:14:12,200 Speaker 1: it's okay. I never did and I love my life 245 00:14:12,360 --> 00:14:15,640 Speaker 1: like materially love my life, and I never thought that. 246 00:14:15,720 --> 00:14:18,040 Speaker 1: I didn't even know there was an industry that I'm 247 00:14:18,040 --> 00:14:21,320 Speaker 1: in right now, and so I just want to kind 248 00:14:21,320 --> 00:14:25,960 Speaker 1: of help build some space to say, you know, right 249 00:14:26,000 --> 00:14:30,080 Speaker 1: now is hard, and we can thin slice your vision 250 00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:34,480 Speaker 1: of the man, woman person you want to be, thin 251 00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:38,000 Speaker 1: slice it to like today or this week, or this 252 00:14:38,160 --> 00:14:41,480 Speaker 1: month or this quarter. You know, like we can thin 253 00:14:41,600 --> 00:14:44,520 Speaker 1: slice it because I think it starts to really freak 254 00:14:44,560 --> 00:14:46,640 Speaker 1: people out when we say, well, what is your life purpose? 255 00:14:47,400 --> 00:14:49,240 Speaker 1: And now that's a big question. I asked that to 256 00:14:49,440 --> 00:14:51,560 Speaker 1: just about everybody, but I want to do it in 257 00:14:51,560 --> 00:14:54,920 Speaker 1: a way that is respectful to I'm trying to keep 258 00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:58,600 Speaker 1: my head above water, dude, you know, like right, let's 259 00:14:58,600 --> 00:15:00,680 Speaker 1: start there. Let's thin slice what's your purpose today? 260 00:15:01,120 --> 00:15:03,800 Speaker 3: I love that terminology. Thin slice. 261 00:15:04,200 --> 00:15:07,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, Oh, it's everything we can do right now, you know, 262 00:15:08,160 --> 00:15:12,960 Speaker 1: because of the radical change that's taking place, unless unless 263 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:17,200 Speaker 1: you have conditioned and trained your mind to manage uncertainty, 264 00:15:17,360 --> 00:15:22,320 Speaker 1: to manage unknown And I think what twenty twenty has 265 00:15:22,800 --> 00:15:26,920 Speaker 1: shown us unpleasantly so is that, let's just talk about 266 00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:29,920 Speaker 1: North America for a minute. We are not prepared to 267 00:15:29,960 --> 00:15:34,960 Speaker 1: deal with both chronic stress and acute stress. Before twenty twenty. 268 00:15:34,960 --> 00:15:38,560 Speaker 1: We're barely keeping it together because the chronic stress was real. 269 00:15:39,320 --> 00:15:42,560 Speaker 1: And the thing, the idea about hustle hard, Are you 270 00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:45,720 Speaker 1: kidding me? That is not how this works. Hustle hard. 271 00:15:45,840 --> 00:15:48,360 Speaker 1: I'm sorry if you kind of ascribe to it, but 272 00:15:48,480 --> 00:15:52,560 Speaker 1: it's so broken because in the world stage, we don't 273 00:15:52,560 --> 00:15:58,000 Speaker 1: talk about working hard. We're talking about recovering intelligently. Everybody 274 00:15:58,040 --> 00:15:59,640 Speaker 1: works hard, So if you've got to tell someone to 275 00:15:59,640 --> 00:16:03,360 Speaker 1: work hard, there's a flaw somewhere. It's like something else 276 00:16:03,360 --> 00:16:05,440 Speaker 1: that I can talk about from a psychological perspective, But 277 00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:09,160 Speaker 1: it's recovering intelligently. It's training your mind so that when 278 00:16:09,160 --> 00:16:11,840 Speaker 1: you are in the thick of stuff, you know how 279 00:16:11,880 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 1: to use the right amount of attentional focus to get 280 00:16:15,280 --> 00:16:18,920 Speaker 1: the thing done. And no more, no less, and to 281 00:16:19,000 --> 00:16:21,880 Speaker 1: get to the edges every day of your capacity is 282 00:16:21,920 --> 00:16:26,200 Speaker 1: how you make you And if you're fatigued and tired 283 00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:29,200 Speaker 1: and scared, you don't run to the edges. But the 284 00:16:29,240 --> 00:16:33,120 Speaker 1: best in the world, athletes and entertainers, executives like they 285 00:16:33,200 --> 00:16:36,160 Speaker 1: run to the edge every day and intelligently recover, run 286 00:16:36,200 --> 00:16:37,720 Speaker 1: to the edge again, fegure out what they need to 287 00:16:37,760 --> 00:16:40,560 Speaker 1: learn and then recover. And so we talk more about 288 00:16:40,600 --> 00:16:43,520 Speaker 1: recovery than we do about, you know, working hard. How 289 00:16:43,520 --> 00:16:46,840 Speaker 1: does that all relate to purpose? Twenty twenty showed us 290 00:16:46,840 --> 00:16:49,480 Speaker 1: that we are not properly trained, Our mind is not 291 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:53,120 Speaker 1: properly trained. And I'd love to talk a little bit 292 00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:53,840 Speaker 1: more about that with you. 293 00:16:54,760 --> 00:16:56,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I would love to hear more about that. 294 00:16:56,800 --> 00:16:59,400 Speaker 3: I think for someone listening to this, their first follow 295 00:16:59,520 --> 00:17:01,560 Speaker 3: up question, and in my first follow up question would 296 00:17:01,560 --> 00:17:05,159 Speaker 3: be how do I start training? Aside from, of course, 297 00:17:05,240 --> 00:17:07,200 Speaker 3: as we all have over the past year, like kind 298 00:17:07,240 --> 00:17:08,920 Speaker 3: of being thrown into the waters. 299 00:17:09,000 --> 00:17:13,000 Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, So let's just pull back the curtain one 300 00:17:13,040 --> 00:17:15,200 Speaker 1: more level here is that there's two ways to think 301 00:17:15,200 --> 00:17:21,160 Speaker 1: about psychology, okay, so the psychology of excellence, certainly one 302 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:25,520 Speaker 1: is the path of self discovery. Okay, and then the 303 00:17:25,560 --> 00:17:27,679 Speaker 1: second are the mental skills so that you can be 304 00:17:27,800 --> 00:17:31,720 Speaker 1: about it more often. So the first things is like 305 00:17:31,760 --> 00:17:35,000 Speaker 1: a series of practices and I can walk you through 306 00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:37,639 Speaker 1: all of them. It's not complicated, but like who are you? 307 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,520 Speaker 1: What is your purpose? What are the goals that are 308 00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:44,320 Speaker 1: going to help you live align to that purpose? Back 309 00:17:44,320 --> 00:17:46,240 Speaker 1: to the vision word, like what does it look and 310 00:17:46,400 --> 00:17:49,680 Speaker 1: feel like when it's all on point? And so there's 311 00:17:49,680 --> 00:17:53,560 Speaker 1: a whole path of self discovery. And I'll pin that 312 00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:55,920 Speaker 1: for just a moment, because Harvard did a seventy five 313 00:17:56,000 --> 00:18:01,400 Speaker 1: year study, a longitudinal study across people's life, and they 314 00:18:01,440 --> 00:18:05,320 Speaker 1: wanted to understand fulfillment. So they measured these people for 315 00:18:05,359 --> 00:18:07,440 Speaker 1: seventy five years and at the end they said were 316 00:18:07,520 --> 00:18:11,400 Speaker 1: you fulfilled? And whatever percentage said yes and the other 317 00:18:11,440 --> 00:18:14,080 Speaker 1: percentage said no. Then the people that said yes, they 318 00:18:14,119 --> 00:18:17,680 Speaker 1: asked them, so you report that you had to fulfilled life, 319 00:18:18,200 --> 00:18:21,720 Speaker 1: how does that happen? And one of the key takeaways 320 00:18:21,720 --> 00:18:23,160 Speaker 1: there was three big ones, but one of the key 321 00:18:23,200 --> 00:18:27,280 Speaker 1: takeaways is that they wrestled with the deep questions of life. 322 00:18:29,240 --> 00:18:31,600 Speaker 1: So if you want to live a fulfilled life, part 323 00:18:31,600 --> 00:18:33,880 Speaker 1: of that is wrestling with the hard questions in life, 324 00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:37,680 Speaker 1: like what is your purpose? And back to our early part. 325 00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:39,600 Speaker 1: If that feels too big right now, no problem, thin 326 00:18:39,720 --> 00:18:42,480 Speaker 1: slice it, like what's your purpose today? You know, was 327 00:18:42,520 --> 00:18:43,359 Speaker 1: your purpose this week? 328 00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:46,159 Speaker 3: For a lot of people that kind of question what 329 00:18:46,359 --> 00:18:50,000 Speaker 3: is your purpose, it's like, whoa, I don't even know 330 00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:53,320 Speaker 3: where to start or how to articulate that. So do 331 00:18:53,400 --> 00:18:57,680 Speaker 3: you have you know, any words of wisdom of how 332 00:18:57,720 --> 00:18:59,480 Speaker 3: to thin slice a question like that? 333 00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:05,240 Speaker 1: Yeah. According to science, there's three parts to purpose. So 334 00:19:05,640 --> 00:19:08,320 Speaker 1: research suggests that people that wrestle with purpose and can 335 00:19:08,480 --> 00:19:12,600 Speaker 1: articulate it. There's three main themes. The first is nobody 336 00:19:12,600 --> 00:19:15,400 Speaker 1: can give you yours. It has to matter to you, 337 00:19:16,119 --> 00:19:21,800 Speaker 1: and so it's called personal meaning. So that's the responsibility 338 00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:25,600 Speaker 1: I think to be an adult, what is my purpose 339 00:19:25,640 --> 00:19:27,800 Speaker 1: in life? And if it doesn't matter to you, it's 340 00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:30,879 Speaker 1: not real. Again, nobody can give it to you, Okay, 341 00:19:31,000 --> 00:19:35,240 Speaker 1: So that's one. The second is it's bigger than you. 342 00:19:35,760 --> 00:19:37,840 Speaker 1: So true purpose these people that are fulfilled and have 343 00:19:37,880 --> 00:19:40,800 Speaker 1: purpose in their life, it's something grander than themselves. So 344 00:19:40,880 --> 00:19:43,600 Speaker 1: it's not the purpose of like getting paid. It's maybe 345 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:47,600 Speaker 1: getting paid for because I can or we can, but 346 00:19:47,640 --> 00:19:51,119 Speaker 1: there's something larger than one's own needs being taken care of. 347 00:19:51,400 --> 00:19:55,040 Speaker 1: And then the third is it's future oriented. So there's 348 00:19:55,080 --> 00:19:59,600 Speaker 1: a down the path type of thinking about purpose, right 349 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,639 Speaker 1: life purpose, So it's bigger than bigger than you, and 350 00:20:03,680 --> 00:20:07,959 Speaker 1: it requires time to materially move toward. So those are 351 00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:10,040 Speaker 1: three components, and how do you do it? You write 352 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:12,760 Speaker 1: it down. There's three ways. A couple threes here, back 353 00:20:12,800 --> 00:20:15,320 Speaker 1: to back, but there's three ways. Right, write some stuff down, 354 00:20:16,320 --> 00:20:20,320 Speaker 1: speak to people that have wisdom, you know that are 355 00:20:20,359 --> 00:20:23,040 Speaker 1: in your community, whether it's a psychologist or you know, 356 00:20:23,840 --> 00:20:26,040 Speaker 1: a preacher or a rabbi or whatever it might be. 357 00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:30,960 Speaker 1: And then the third is to investigate in a practice 358 00:20:31,000 --> 00:20:37,080 Speaker 1: of mindfulness where you're really listening and understanding that your 359 00:20:37,119 --> 00:20:39,760 Speaker 1: inner nature, like the thoughts and how they relate to 360 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:44,000 Speaker 1: your emotions, and when you wrestle with ideas, what happens internally. 361 00:20:44,040 --> 00:20:49,040 Speaker 1: So those are three meditation conversations with wisdom and then 362 00:20:49,600 --> 00:20:50,760 Speaker 1: writing to be true? 363 00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:54,640 Speaker 3: What is your purpose? 364 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:55,720 Speaker 2: Oh? 365 00:20:55,880 --> 00:20:57,200 Speaker 1: I haven't done. No, I'm joking. 366 00:20:58,760 --> 00:21:00,200 Speaker 3: Can you even imagine? 367 00:21:00,400 --> 00:21:03,359 Speaker 1: Yeah? Oh my god, I shouldn't answer that. Yeah, So 368 00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:07,840 Speaker 1: I'll say that it changed about ten years ago, and 369 00:21:07,920 --> 00:21:09,399 Speaker 1: so I can tell you my first one. But then 370 00:21:09,400 --> 00:21:12,000 Speaker 1: it's changed. It's very clear for the last ten years. 371 00:21:12,080 --> 00:21:14,439 Speaker 1: It's to help people live in the present moment more often. 372 00:21:15,720 --> 00:21:20,280 Speaker 1: And the reason that is I light up when I 373 00:21:20,320 --> 00:21:22,600 Speaker 1: even say it and think about it, thank you for asking, 374 00:21:22,800 --> 00:21:27,000 Speaker 1: is because the present moment is where wisdom is revealed. 375 00:21:27,680 --> 00:21:30,479 Speaker 1: It is where high performance is expressed. So there's like, 376 00:21:30,520 --> 00:21:33,000 Speaker 1: that's the world I'm in. So the present moment is 377 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:37,000 Speaker 1: where wisdom is revealed, high performance is expressed, and all 378 00:21:37,040 --> 00:21:40,440 Speaker 1: things that are true, beautiful, good, and amazing are experienced. 379 00:21:41,119 --> 00:21:44,600 Speaker 1: And so the present moment is where we meet ourselves. 380 00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:47,719 Speaker 1: And so if I can help people by training their 381 00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,120 Speaker 1: mind live in the present moment more often, I think 382 00:21:50,119 --> 00:21:54,640 Speaker 1: that we begin to reimagine humanity. We get to reimagine 383 00:21:54,640 --> 00:21:58,840 Speaker 1: what it means to be fully alive, working towards the 384 00:21:58,880 --> 00:22:02,639 Speaker 1: capacity of all our collective potential. And that's not going 385 00:22:02,720 --> 00:22:05,119 Speaker 1: to happen unless we spend more time in the present. 386 00:22:05,560 --> 00:22:08,520 Speaker 1: But we're so busy worrying about later and worrying about 387 00:22:08,520 --> 00:22:12,119 Speaker 1: what had happened, that we're missing even glimpses of the 388 00:22:12,119 --> 00:22:15,000 Speaker 1: present moment throughout the day because we're busy, busy, busy, hustle, hustle, 389 00:22:15,040 --> 00:22:19,680 Speaker 1: hustle that we're not dropped in to meet the demands 390 00:22:19,680 --> 00:22:23,800 Speaker 1: of this moment in a squared up, shouldered way, because 391 00:22:23,920 --> 00:22:26,360 Speaker 1: it takes everything that you have to meet the demands 392 00:22:26,400 --> 00:22:28,879 Speaker 1: of moments, because our mind wants to check out to 393 00:22:28,920 --> 00:22:31,919 Speaker 1: try to solve danger as opposed to be fluid with 394 00:22:32,520 --> 00:22:35,320 Speaker 1: the risk that is unfolding right now. And that risk 395 00:22:35,359 --> 00:22:37,160 Speaker 1: for you and me is neither of us know what's 396 00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:40,000 Speaker 1: about to happen. And so if we can trust enough 397 00:22:40,440 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 1: by training our minds, if we can trust enough that 398 00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:45,400 Speaker 1: we can meet the new demand, then we can kind 399 00:22:45,400 --> 00:22:48,240 Speaker 1: of go, oh, let me enjoy this life, this unfolding 400 00:22:48,320 --> 00:22:49,359 Speaker 1: moment to moment life. 401 00:22:49,600 --> 00:22:53,840 Speaker 3: For those that have a problem managing the chaos, for 402 00:22:53,960 --> 00:22:59,360 Speaker 3: those that are in a similar circumstance or find themselves 403 00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:02,440 Speaker 3: in this circumstance where they can't focus on the now 404 00:23:02,480 --> 00:23:05,520 Speaker 3: because they have so much anxiety or worry about what 405 00:23:05,640 --> 00:23:09,520 Speaker 3: is next, how do you advise that they get to 406 00:23:09,600 --> 00:23:12,480 Speaker 3: this place where they're better equipped to handle the now. 407 00:23:13,080 --> 00:23:15,960 Speaker 1: That's where mental training comes in. And so what you're 408 00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:20,280 Speaker 1: describing is like there's ranges, you know, clinical anxiety to 409 00:23:20,880 --> 00:23:24,280 Speaker 1: excessive worry to something smaller than that which would be 410 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:28,239 Speaker 1: you know, like I kind of worry about things, or 411 00:23:28,320 --> 00:23:31,680 Speaker 1: my mind is a little easily distracted. So depending on 412 00:23:31,720 --> 00:23:34,880 Speaker 1: where somebody is on a spectrum that we would suggest, 413 00:23:35,200 --> 00:23:38,359 Speaker 1: you know, heavy lifting or lightlifting, but the lifting is 414 00:23:38,440 --> 00:23:41,359 Speaker 1: going to be mindfulness will be part of the lifting. 415 00:23:41,720 --> 00:23:45,280 Speaker 1: Breathing training will be another part of the lift. Awareness 416 00:23:45,320 --> 00:23:48,159 Speaker 1: of your inner dialogue so that you can adjust and 417 00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:51,800 Speaker 1: come return back to now is the essence of one 418 00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:54,760 Speaker 1: of the cornerstones of mindfulness. So you become aware of 419 00:23:54,800 --> 00:23:57,719 Speaker 1: your inner life, your thoughts and emotions, and so that 420 00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:01,360 Speaker 1: you can pivot and come back to now, come back again, 421 00:24:01,440 --> 00:24:03,199 Speaker 1: and come back again. And we can double click on 422 00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,359 Speaker 1: that for sure, and then the other some sort of 423 00:24:05,359 --> 00:24:09,240 Speaker 1: breathing mechanism or breathing training so that when your body activates, 424 00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:12,040 Speaker 1: Because your brain's job is to scan the world and 425 00:24:12,080 --> 00:24:17,080 Speaker 1: find the dangers. That's its job. And if you don't 426 00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:20,960 Speaker 1: use your mind to work with the brain. Again, the 427 00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:23,919 Speaker 1: brain's job is to scan the world to find danger 428 00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:27,680 Speaker 1: and to either fight or run away. But the mind's 429 00:24:27,760 --> 00:24:30,680 Speaker 1: job is to be the software that is governing and 430 00:24:30,760 --> 00:24:37,080 Speaker 1: guiding that brain's dictum for survival. Primarily, and I'm oversimplifying 431 00:24:37,080 --> 00:24:40,800 Speaker 1: a very beautiful hand and glove interaction between software hardware 432 00:24:40,840 --> 00:24:44,720 Speaker 1: that is so complicated we struggle with analogies of how 433 00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:48,399 Speaker 1: it really works, But the mind can be It's a 434 00:24:48,440 --> 00:24:51,400 Speaker 1: software that can be upgraded. And you know, I mean, 435 00:24:51,440 --> 00:24:53,879 Speaker 1: who trained your mind? Out of curiosity? 436 00:24:54,720 --> 00:24:56,399 Speaker 3: Who trains my mind? 437 00:24:56,440 --> 00:24:59,240 Speaker 1: Who trained your mind? Because you're operating at a certain 438 00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:03,480 Speaker 1: with a certain system, you've got a what version would 439 00:25:03,480 --> 00:25:04,800 Speaker 1: you say you are of yourself? 440 00:25:05,320 --> 00:25:08,080 Speaker 3: If I had to take a step back and really 441 00:25:08,119 --> 00:25:11,360 Speaker 3: think about it. And it's interesting to me to hear 442 00:25:11,480 --> 00:25:16,439 Speaker 3: you say that the spectrum, because I certainly used to 443 00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:21,560 Speaker 3: be a person who didn't navigate frequent anxiety very well. 444 00:25:21,880 --> 00:25:26,040 Speaker 3: And I have found, especially over the past year, that 445 00:25:26,640 --> 00:25:32,680 Speaker 3: through defining my purpose, integrating more mindfulness into my regular routine, 446 00:25:32,880 --> 00:25:36,879 Speaker 3: doing more meditation and breath work, I have been able 447 00:25:36,960 --> 00:25:41,520 Speaker 3: to tap in to an ability that the old Emily. 448 00:25:41,680 --> 00:25:43,439 Speaker 3: And I'm not exactly sure if I can give you 449 00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:47,000 Speaker 3: what level we're on now, but an older version of 450 00:25:47,040 --> 00:25:52,120 Speaker 3: myself certainly didn't even think was possible for her. Now 451 00:25:52,160 --> 00:25:56,160 Speaker 3: does that mean that I feel as though I never 452 00:25:56,200 --> 00:25:59,040 Speaker 3: feel like her? Sometimes? Of course not, but it does 453 00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:02,639 Speaker 3: mean that now I've seen the other side of the coin, 454 00:26:02,720 --> 00:26:06,480 Speaker 3: so to speak, and I feel more empowered to come 455 00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:09,920 Speaker 3: back to calm in circumstances that before I didn't think 456 00:26:10,040 --> 00:26:10,640 Speaker 3: was possible. 457 00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:14,240 Speaker 1: Yeah, that's it now. So that's let's call that an upgrade. 458 00:26:14,640 --> 00:26:16,199 Speaker 1: You know, it could be a minor upgrade or a 459 00:26:16,200 --> 00:26:19,960 Speaker 1: major upgrade to be determined. But to get to the 460 00:26:20,040 --> 00:26:24,440 Speaker 1: upgrades we do, it does require some programming. And I'm 461 00:26:24,480 --> 00:26:27,320 Speaker 1: over using the analogy right now, but mental training is 462 00:26:27,359 --> 00:26:30,840 Speaker 1: the way that you can upgrade the software. So confidence 463 00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:34,280 Speaker 1: is a skill? How about that? You know? I would 464 00:26:34,480 --> 00:26:36,359 Speaker 1: I bet quite a bit of money that unless you 465 00:26:36,440 --> 00:26:39,199 Speaker 1: went out and looked for it, nobody has taught you 466 00:26:39,720 --> 00:26:41,480 Speaker 1: how to train your mind. Like it didn't happen in 467 00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:44,520 Speaker 1: grade school or high school or college. So we have 468 00:26:44,560 --> 00:26:47,439 Speaker 1: to go to a shrink. Coaches really don't know, you know, 469 00:26:47,600 --> 00:26:49,480 Speaker 1: I love coaches, It's the world I live in. But 470 00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:52,720 Speaker 1: they say, hey, come on, you should be confident. Won't 471 00:26:52,760 --> 00:26:53,480 Speaker 1: show me how? 472 00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:54,199 Speaker 3: You know? 473 00:26:54,400 --> 00:26:57,639 Speaker 1: Like, oh, I show me how? So it's a trainable skill. 474 00:26:58,520 --> 00:27:01,720 Speaker 1: Did anybody show you the mechanics of confidence? Have you 475 00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:02,160 Speaker 1: been training? 476 00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:03,880 Speaker 3: Not specifically? 477 00:27:04,720 --> 00:27:07,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, we'll talk. We can talk about that some other time. 478 00:27:09,160 --> 00:27:13,479 Speaker 1: What do you mean? Yeah, so how do you train it. 479 00:27:13,520 --> 00:27:17,520 Speaker 1: So it comes from only one place, which is what 480 00:27:17,560 --> 00:27:20,520 Speaker 1: you say to yourself. But what you say to yourself 481 00:27:20,600 --> 00:27:25,960 Speaker 1: must be credible. And so to speak credibly to yourself 482 00:27:26,200 --> 00:27:30,800 Speaker 1: about yourself relative to what you think the demands are 483 00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:36,240 Speaker 1: that are coming. So confidence is a state specific experience. 484 00:27:36,440 --> 00:27:39,480 Speaker 1: So it's moment to moment really, and if you have 485 00:27:39,560 --> 00:27:42,120 Speaker 1: the inner mechanisms to speak to yourself a certain way 486 00:27:42,200 --> 00:27:46,639 Speaker 1: about your skills relative to the perceived demand, you're going 487 00:27:46,720 --> 00:27:49,760 Speaker 1: to figure it out. But to speak to yourself in 488 00:27:49,800 --> 00:27:53,080 Speaker 1: a way that has credibility, you have to have done 489 00:27:53,400 --> 00:27:57,160 Speaker 1: really hard things in your life. And so what happens 490 00:27:57,160 --> 00:27:59,240 Speaker 1: for most people is when they feel a bit anxious, 491 00:27:59,359 --> 00:28:01,520 Speaker 1: so their heart to it ticks up a little bit, 492 00:28:01,520 --> 00:28:04,760 Speaker 1: they're breathing changes, they start to see the dangers in 493 00:28:04,800 --> 00:28:10,040 Speaker 1: the world. Is instantly the mind the software goes to, oh, 494 00:28:10,119 --> 00:28:14,160 Speaker 1: well this is big, feel me like I'm I'm over, 495 00:28:15,520 --> 00:28:17,800 Speaker 1: my cup is spilling over, like I'm kind of a mess, 496 00:28:18,480 --> 00:28:22,240 Speaker 1: as opposed to instantly going to like, oh wait, I'm 497 00:28:22,280 --> 00:28:24,920 Speaker 1: built for hard things. I've done A and B and C, 498 00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,440 Speaker 1: and look I can do A. I think I can 499 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:30,240 Speaker 1: do B, and I'm definitely gonna knock down c But 500 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:35,000 Speaker 1: that's training. Training, you know, to know in your history 501 00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:37,040 Speaker 1: what gives you the right to say something like I 502 00:28:37,040 --> 00:28:39,120 Speaker 1: can do hard things. So how do you do it? 503 00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:42,200 Speaker 1: You got to write it down and you got to practice, 504 00:28:42,520 --> 00:28:45,920 Speaker 1: you know, just like it sounds mechanical, emily, but it 505 00:28:46,040 --> 00:28:48,960 Speaker 1: sets and reps, you know, And I think behind you, 506 00:28:48,960 --> 00:28:53,320 Speaker 1: You've got like times. 507 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,240 Speaker 3: Behind me, I've got some some marathon time posters. 508 00:28:54,720 --> 00:28:55,960 Speaker 1: Okay, who's are they? 509 00:28:56,680 --> 00:28:57,640 Speaker 3: That their mind? 510 00:28:59,760 --> 00:29:01,920 Speaker 1: So so you know what sets and reps are about, 511 00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,200 Speaker 1: you know, and like there's no way to really get 512 00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:07,480 Speaker 1: better without true sets and reps. And so training your 513 00:29:07,560 --> 00:29:11,200 Speaker 1: mind to know the types of thinking that is credible 514 00:29:11,320 --> 00:29:14,000 Speaker 1: that will help you is how you get to the 515 00:29:14,080 --> 00:29:19,520 Speaker 1: ability to be consistent with confidence, not arrogant, not naive 516 00:29:19,600 --> 00:29:24,040 Speaker 1: confidence like boastful confidence, but true, grounded like now I 517 00:29:24,080 --> 00:29:30,880 Speaker 1: know how to relate to the challenge. 518 00:29:34,160 --> 00:29:36,800 Speaker 3: Taking a break from today's episode to give some love 519 00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:41,320 Speaker 3: to my sponsor at Element. Element is a zero sugar 520 00:29:41,520 --> 00:29:45,720 Speaker 3: electrolyte drink mix born from a need. 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That's drink 538 00:30:43,080 --> 00:30:46,880 Speaker 3: lmnt dot com slash hurdle and get a free sample 539 00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:48,800 Speaker 3: pack with your purchase today. 540 00:30:49,200 --> 00:30:50,960 Speaker 4: Again, that is drink Element dot com. 541 00:30:51,040 --> 00:30:54,160 Speaker 3: Drink lmnt dot com slash hurdle to get a free 542 00:30:54,360 --> 00:30:58,560 Speaker 3: sample pack with your first purchase of packets or their 543 00:30:58,600 --> 00:31:09,719 Speaker 3: delicious sparkling Today. Talk to me about the evolution of 544 00:31:09,760 --> 00:31:13,200 Speaker 3: your confidence going through college, getting to a point where 545 00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:16,760 Speaker 3: you were getting more interested in your studies, and coming 546 00:31:16,760 --> 00:31:21,959 Speaker 3: to a place where you started to recognize, Hey, I 547 00:31:22,000 --> 00:31:25,640 Speaker 3: think I could be good at life doing something with 548 00:31:25,720 --> 00:31:27,840 Speaker 3: this material that I'm learning about. 549 00:31:28,160 --> 00:31:30,920 Speaker 1: Well, I didn't understand confidence when I was in high school. 550 00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,800 Speaker 1: That's kind of what happened to me and surfing, is 551 00:31:33,800 --> 00:31:35,160 Speaker 1: that I was a mess because I didn't know how 552 00:31:35,200 --> 00:31:38,400 Speaker 1: to speak to myself properly that would build and I'll 553 00:31:38,520 --> 00:31:42,040 Speaker 1: just oversimplify. There's there's really an oversimplification. There's two types 554 00:31:42,080 --> 00:31:45,840 Speaker 1: of thoughts. Thoughts that create space and build, and thoughts 555 00:31:45,880 --> 00:31:48,920 Speaker 1: that can strict and tighten up. You know, oversimplifying. But 556 00:31:49,560 --> 00:31:52,800 Speaker 1: so I didn't even understand that basic framework, and so 557 00:31:53,160 --> 00:31:58,440 Speaker 1: I left my inner experience to what other people might 558 00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:04,080 Speaker 1: be thinking of me. How dangerous is that? So fear 559 00:32:04,320 --> 00:32:08,680 Speaker 1: of other people's opinions. Call it fopo. You've heard of 560 00:32:08,720 --> 00:32:12,920 Speaker 1: yolo and y fomo, right, So faupo, I think, is 561 00:32:12,960 --> 00:32:17,040 Speaker 1: the great constrictor of human potential in modern times. Fearing 562 00:32:17,200 --> 00:32:21,040 Speaker 1: other people's opinions. So that's what I was leaving my 563 00:32:21,200 --> 00:32:25,760 Speaker 1: internal state to what others might think of me, and 564 00:32:25,840 --> 00:32:29,760 Speaker 1: So when did that change? When I got sick and 565 00:32:29,840 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 1: tired of being at the whips end of my environment, 566 00:32:34,200 --> 00:32:37,280 Speaker 1: when I was fatigued as a man, saying why do 567 00:32:37,360 --> 00:32:40,440 Speaker 1: I feel this way? I'm trying to present myself a 568 00:32:40,480 --> 00:32:43,360 Speaker 1: certain way, but really inside it doesn't really match. And 569 00:32:43,400 --> 00:32:47,360 Speaker 1: so this was like early thirties for me, and I said, 570 00:32:47,920 --> 00:32:50,800 Speaker 1: I'm done with that, like what there's and I was 571 00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:54,520 Speaker 1: studying it, you know, I was just finishing up my PhD. 572 00:32:55,440 --> 00:33:00,440 Speaker 1: And there's a moment when I hadn't yet graduated. There 573 00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:03,920 Speaker 1: was an international conference that I was speaking at and 574 00:33:03,960 --> 00:33:06,000 Speaker 1: it was my first international conference, and I was kind 575 00:33:06,000 --> 00:33:10,160 Speaker 1: of changing or challenging grounded theory in the field and 576 00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:12,880 Speaker 1: you could see and feel I was backstage with a 577 00:33:12,920 --> 00:33:16,680 Speaker 1: friend of mine and the dean of my school, and 578 00:33:16,720 --> 00:33:19,200 Speaker 1: you could feel the energy kind of filling up the hall, 579 00:33:19,240 --> 00:33:23,480 Speaker 1: and you could hear the you know, the multiple hundreds, 580 00:33:23,520 --> 00:33:25,440 Speaker 1: maybe thousands, I don't know, it's a little foggy to 581 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:29,360 Speaker 1: me now, but it was a large room. And I 582 00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:32,880 Speaker 1: was feeling good, Like I was feeling really good, and 583 00:33:33,080 --> 00:33:35,040 Speaker 1: I've got my suit on. It's like the first time 584 00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:36,440 Speaker 1: I had a suit other than a wedding or a 585 00:33:36,480 --> 00:33:40,160 Speaker 1: funeral or something. You know, I'm zero professionalism. I printed 586 00:33:40,200 --> 00:33:44,880 Speaker 1: business cards just for this thing. And so I'm ready. 587 00:33:44,920 --> 00:33:48,560 Speaker 1: I'm feeling great about going up there. And it's about 588 00:33:48,680 --> 00:33:52,600 Speaker 1: five minutes before and my buddy nudges me backstage and 589 00:33:52,640 --> 00:33:54,320 Speaker 1: he goes, hey, look in the front row. So I 590 00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:56,240 Speaker 1: kind of peeked me through the corner and I look, 591 00:33:56,840 --> 00:33:59,320 Speaker 1: and there's a gentleman and I go, oh, my, is 592 00:33:59,360 --> 00:34:03,479 Speaker 1: that him the person I was challenging the theory? And 593 00:34:03,520 --> 00:34:05,240 Speaker 1: I looked at my buddy and my eyes got big 594 00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:08,520 Speaker 1: English yup and I looked back and he grew like 595 00:34:09,000 --> 00:34:12,400 Speaker 1: to nine feet tall, you know, five hundred and fifty pounds, 596 00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:14,960 Speaker 1: like he just looked like he was this massive human 597 00:34:15,040 --> 00:34:18,360 Speaker 1: that was pissed off. Okay, so it was not really, 598 00:34:18,400 --> 00:34:20,759 Speaker 1: but you know what I mean. So I instantly went 599 00:34:20,800 --> 00:34:25,000 Speaker 1: into a state of panic. And so here's the dialogue. 600 00:34:26,120 --> 00:34:28,880 Speaker 1: Oh god, they're going to find out. Everyone here is 601 00:34:28,920 --> 00:34:32,000 Speaker 1: going to find out that I don't. I'm bullshitting, I don't. 602 00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:36,600 Speaker 1: Oh God, they're going to find out. And so, you know, 603 00:34:36,680 --> 00:34:42,000 Speaker 1: imposter syndrome full effect, Like objectively, I did, I really 604 00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:44,480 Speaker 1: do know. I knew my stuff. This is no different 605 00:34:44,520 --> 00:34:46,359 Speaker 1: than when I was fifteen and now I'm thirty something, 606 00:34:46,360 --> 00:34:49,880 Speaker 1: and it's like or just before thirty, and so I 607 00:34:49,920 --> 00:34:53,040 Speaker 1: started to hit the panic button. My body temperature heated up. 608 00:34:53,120 --> 00:34:56,360 Speaker 1: There's a beat of sweat down my back. My forehead 609 00:34:56,360 --> 00:34:58,440 Speaker 1: started to kind of blister with some sweat. I've got 610 00:34:58,440 --> 00:35:01,440 Speaker 1: a little tremor now, my breathing changing, my heart's ticking up. 611 00:35:01,719 --> 00:35:03,719 Speaker 1: I look down at my business card and I'm trying 612 00:35:03,760 --> 00:35:06,240 Speaker 1: to keep it cool. I looked down at my business 613 00:35:06,280 --> 00:35:08,040 Speaker 1: card and I realized that I didn't put my email 614 00:35:08,040 --> 00:35:11,799 Speaker 1: address on it. This is like, you know, twenty years ago. 615 00:35:11,800 --> 00:35:16,640 Speaker 1: And I'm like, again, I use that to go, oh god, 616 00:35:17,000 --> 00:35:18,799 Speaker 1: I'm such a rookie. And I'm now I'm trying to 617 00:35:18,840 --> 00:35:21,400 Speaker 1: write my business my email in the back of my 618 00:35:21,440 --> 00:35:24,200 Speaker 1: bit and my handshaking, and I'm looking at the card 619 00:35:24,239 --> 00:35:26,799 Speaker 1: and my visual space shial is all wrong. So I'm 620 00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:28,560 Speaker 1: like writing down the side of the card, trying to 621 00:35:28,560 --> 00:35:31,279 Speaker 1: fit it all in. And these are all things that 622 00:35:31,320 --> 00:35:37,200 Speaker 1: I'm using to tighten up further. And so I realized, 623 00:35:37,239 --> 00:35:38,960 Speaker 1: and so here's the other narrative, Like, oh my god, 624 00:35:39,000 --> 00:35:43,520 Speaker 1: I'm supposed to be talking about like being present and confidence, 625 00:35:43,760 --> 00:35:45,680 Speaker 1: and I'm a mess, you know, So it's all that 626 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:48,600 Speaker 1: stuff that's wrapped up if I can't even talk about 627 00:35:48,600 --> 00:35:50,080 Speaker 1: it or to live it, like what a phony. And 628 00:35:50,120 --> 00:35:53,080 Speaker 1: so so I realized at that moment there's no way 629 00:35:53,080 --> 00:35:54,319 Speaker 1: around it. You got to go through it. You got 630 00:35:54,320 --> 00:35:57,080 Speaker 1: to do the fundamental work. And I thought I was 631 00:35:57,080 --> 00:35:59,279 Speaker 1: doing it, but I was bullshitting myself. And so that 632 00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:03,520 Speaker 1: moment changed me. And so thank you for telling that story. 633 00:36:03,520 --> 00:36:06,040 Speaker 1: It's a long story, but it changed me. 634 00:36:06,920 --> 00:36:09,080 Speaker 3: Well what happened, I mean, did you go on the stage. 635 00:36:09,719 --> 00:36:13,040 Speaker 1: Yeah, so I'm just scala. One to ten. Ten is 636 00:36:13,080 --> 00:36:15,000 Speaker 1: like I just threw up in my mouth. And a 637 00:36:15,080 --> 00:36:17,480 Speaker 1: five is the sweet spot, you know, or really like 638 00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,120 Speaker 1: the porridge is just right, it's not too hot, too cold. 639 00:36:21,040 --> 00:36:23,280 Speaker 1: And I was at like a nine and a half 640 00:36:23,400 --> 00:36:27,160 Speaker 1: just right before it. And funny thing is is, as 641 00:36:27,200 --> 00:36:30,600 Speaker 1: I was writing, I'm trying to play it cool because 642 00:36:30,600 --> 00:36:32,360 Speaker 1: I don't I didn't want my buddy to think I 643 00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:35,400 Speaker 1: was a mess, you know, even though that's what friends 644 00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:37,840 Speaker 1: are four you know, like, but he was, you know, 645 00:36:37,920 --> 00:36:39,840 Speaker 1: he was loving that. I was kind of like freaking 646 00:36:39,880 --> 00:36:41,520 Speaker 1: out a little bit because he could kind of tell. 647 00:36:41,719 --> 00:36:44,360 Speaker 1: And I started when I was writing my address. I 648 00:36:44,520 --> 00:36:49,239 Speaker 1: just was focusing on getting my my name squared up. 649 00:36:49,640 --> 00:36:52,040 Speaker 1: So it required a deep focus, and so I was 650 00:36:52,080 --> 00:36:54,719 Speaker 1: just getting that right, trying to have a clear kind 651 00:36:54,760 --> 00:36:58,640 Speaker 1: of penmanship on it, and that actually materially was gating 652 00:36:58,680 --> 00:37:01,160 Speaker 1: out all of the danger. It was gating out all 653 00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:04,080 Speaker 1: of the anxiety, all the worry, all the shitty self talk, 654 00:37:04,600 --> 00:37:06,680 Speaker 1: and so it was just a deep focus that I 655 00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:09,160 Speaker 1: was on and I'm trying to breathe the whole time. 656 00:37:09,560 --> 00:37:15,240 Speaker 1: And then it started clicking. So probably like forty seconds 657 00:37:15,280 --> 00:37:18,120 Speaker 1: to go. Thirty seconds ago, my buddy notices that I'm 658 00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:21,279 Speaker 1: still writing on my cards and he nudges me again. 659 00:37:21,320 --> 00:37:23,759 Speaker 1: He's like, dude, you get ready now. And I kind 660 00:37:23,800 --> 00:37:26,760 Speaker 1: of came back and I was like, oh, I'm back. 661 00:37:27,880 --> 00:37:30,240 Speaker 1: Like that, all that other stuff went away. I didn't 662 00:37:30,239 --> 00:37:33,560 Speaker 1: have a great mind, but I was. I was in 663 00:37:33,600 --> 00:37:36,640 Speaker 1: a frame that I could manage at that point, and 664 00:37:36,719 --> 00:37:39,239 Speaker 1: so it was good. It was a good experience for me. 665 00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,160 Speaker 1: More importantly, other than what I said, what I learned 666 00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:45,120 Speaker 1: backstage was more important than what I did on stage, 667 00:37:45,200 --> 00:37:47,400 Speaker 1: and it was fine. On stage, it was fine, So 668 00:37:48,840 --> 00:37:49,360 Speaker 1: we thank you. 669 00:37:51,040 --> 00:37:54,959 Speaker 3: So then share with me how you go from this 670 00:37:55,480 --> 00:38:00,480 Speaker 3: pivotal moment for you and understanding the importance of going 671 00:38:00,560 --> 00:38:06,840 Speaker 3: through something to getting to the place where as you 672 00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:10,920 Speaker 3: referenced before you're in the amphitheater, talk to me about 673 00:38:10,960 --> 00:38:12,440 Speaker 3: that transition in your life. 674 00:38:13,680 --> 00:38:17,960 Speaker 1: Well, I think the segue in there is that. And 675 00:38:18,000 --> 00:38:19,960 Speaker 1: I've been fortunate to work now in some of the 676 00:38:20,000 --> 00:38:24,000 Speaker 1: most hostile environments known to humans. Certainly rugged environments like 677 00:38:24,040 --> 00:38:28,040 Speaker 1: the last ten years with the Seattle Seahawks, but that's rugged. 678 00:38:28,560 --> 00:38:30,719 Speaker 1: There's some pressure in those environments. But some of the 679 00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:34,719 Speaker 1: other places, like the stuff Red Bull Stratos and a 680 00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:37,520 Speaker 1: project called Heaven sent Rebel Stratus is when Felix baum 681 00:38:37,560 --> 00:38:40,160 Speaker 1: Gotner jumped from about one hundred and thirty thousand feet 682 00:38:40,160 --> 00:38:43,360 Speaker 1: and the brightest minds in aerospace weren't sure if he 683 00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:47,480 Speaker 1: was going to make it. It was incredibly dangerous and 684 00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:51,719 Speaker 1: wonderful project that I was on. So how do you 685 00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:54,279 Speaker 1: go from those environments? I think the segue that makes 686 00:38:54,320 --> 00:38:57,440 Speaker 1: sense is that I needed to do the work, and 687 00:38:57,640 --> 00:39:02,040 Speaker 1: just like we physically prepare with sets and reps so 688 00:39:02,080 --> 00:39:06,080 Speaker 1: that we can express ourselves creatively on the playing field, 689 00:39:06,200 --> 00:39:11,239 Speaker 1: whether that's the boardroom, or it's the field, or it's 690 00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:13,680 Speaker 1: the living room. You know, when there's a moment that's 691 00:39:13,719 --> 00:39:17,000 Speaker 1: got some stress on it, like can we use our 692 00:39:17,239 --> 00:39:21,360 Speaker 1: faculties to express ourselves at towards our upper capability that 693 00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:24,000 Speaker 1: I needed to put in the reps not only physically 694 00:39:24,040 --> 00:39:29,600 Speaker 1: but mentally. And so you know, the mental stuff is meditation, 695 00:39:30,120 --> 00:39:35,120 Speaker 1: it's breathing work, it's clarity of purpose, it is training 696 00:39:35,160 --> 00:39:38,239 Speaker 1: deep focus. It is a framework of optimism, which is 697 00:39:38,280 --> 00:39:42,359 Speaker 1: a trainable skill. All of that builds the ability to 698 00:39:42,400 --> 00:39:47,560 Speaker 1: be more resilient to deal with the real challenges that come. 699 00:39:47,640 --> 00:39:50,760 Speaker 1: If you want to do something special with your own capabilities, 700 00:39:50,960 --> 00:39:53,680 Speaker 1: there's going to be real challenges. Karch Karai is one 701 00:39:53,719 --> 00:39:56,240 Speaker 1: of the best to ever play the game of volleyball 702 00:39:56,280 --> 00:40:00,160 Speaker 1: and coach it. So multiple gold medals, Olympics, World Championship, 703 00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:05,440 Speaker 1: indoor beach, you name it. He is a legend. And 704 00:40:05,480 --> 00:40:07,839 Speaker 1: as I was working with the US women's national team 705 00:40:07,880 --> 00:40:11,680 Speaker 1: going into Rio for the last Olympic Games, and he 706 00:40:11,680 --> 00:40:14,160 Speaker 1: said he was the coach, and he says, Mike, I'm 707 00:40:14,200 --> 00:40:16,360 Speaker 1: certain that no one gets to the podium at the 708 00:40:16,400 --> 00:40:20,520 Speaker 1: Olympic Games without passing through a double barrel shotgun while 709 00:40:20,560 --> 00:40:23,879 Speaker 1: at the Games. So let's prepare our team to know 710 00:40:23,920 --> 00:40:27,399 Speaker 1: how to stand down a double barrel shotgun. That's right, 711 00:40:27,719 --> 00:40:28,920 Speaker 1: So that's training the mind. 712 00:40:29,080 --> 00:40:35,239 Speaker 3: You referenced the US women's national team. You referenced the Seahawks. 713 00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:40,480 Speaker 3: Talk to me about the first time that you recall 714 00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:44,560 Speaker 3: perhaps getting that phone caller making your way into a 715 00:40:44,600 --> 00:40:49,319 Speaker 3: scenario where you were working with someone that you yourself 716 00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:55,920 Speaker 3: had previously heard of, or someone of such what's the 717 00:40:55,920 --> 00:40:59,720 Speaker 3: word I want to use here, esteem or a well 718 00:40:59,760 --> 00:41:02,920 Speaker 3: known individual that kind of scared you a little bit. 719 00:41:04,400 --> 00:41:09,520 Speaker 1: That's cool thought. I think that I'll tell you a 720 00:41:09,520 --> 00:41:11,520 Speaker 1: funny story. I was nine years old. 721 00:41:12,280 --> 00:41:16,319 Speaker 3: Well's I expected this one to start, and. 722 00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:17,799 Speaker 1: I'll let you be the judge of funny. You know, 723 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:20,239 Speaker 1: I think it's funny. But it was nine years old 724 00:41:20,239 --> 00:41:22,759 Speaker 1: and I'm kind of the hillbilly that I was in 725 00:41:22,840 --> 00:41:25,960 Speaker 1: Virginia and there was this event where the kicker for 726 00:41:26,000 --> 00:41:27,640 Speaker 1: the Redskins was going to do a talk at the 727 00:41:27,719 --> 00:41:30,200 Speaker 1: local high school. And my Dad's like, hey, let's go, 728 00:41:30,239 --> 00:41:32,440 Speaker 1: And I was like, for what? And so we went 729 00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:34,879 Speaker 1: and we talked and Mark Moseley was the kicker's name, 730 00:41:35,600 --> 00:41:38,800 Speaker 1: and there's a big lineup afterwards of all the kids signing, 731 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:44,440 Speaker 1: getting their cards signed, and it was I don't know, like, 732 00:41:45,840 --> 00:41:47,560 Speaker 1: and my Dad's like, let's get in line, let's do that, 733 00:41:47,880 --> 00:41:51,600 Speaker 1: And I was like, no, Like I'd rather go home. 734 00:41:52,719 --> 00:41:55,200 Speaker 1: I had no interest. I don't. I still to this day, 735 00:41:55,239 --> 00:41:57,399 Speaker 1: am more interested in the human than what they've done. 736 00:41:58,160 --> 00:42:01,800 Speaker 1: So to answer your question, honestly, it almost will sound 737 00:42:02,080 --> 00:42:04,879 Speaker 1: blasphemous because I so enjoy the people I work with, 738 00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:07,600 Speaker 1: but I don't lead with like, look what they've done, 739 00:42:07,760 --> 00:42:10,759 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, because I do know that they have 740 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:14,360 Speaker 1: the same worries, they breathe the same air, they have 741 00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:20,719 Speaker 1: the same basic dreams for their kids, and I'm more 742 00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:24,399 Speaker 1: interested in the human experience rather than the performative part 743 00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:27,560 Speaker 1: of them. So maybe that's a blessing, you know, Like 744 00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:30,920 Speaker 1: I don't go to that place, and I think that 745 00:42:31,320 --> 00:42:33,360 Speaker 1: I think that that's probably felt by other people. 746 00:42:34,920 --> 00:42:38,920 Speaker 3: Not to say that it's not felt, but to say 747 00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:41,960 Speaker 3: and maybe like to allow me to brag on you 748 00:42:42,000 --> 00:42:44,920 Speaker 3: for a moment, I've had Carrie Wallis Jennings on the show. 749 00:42:45,040 --> 00:42:48,640 Speaker 3: Obviously again you mentioned working with the volleyball team, and 750 00:42:48,680 --> 00:42:51,920 Speaker 3: I know just from seeing you speak everywhere from the 751 00:42:52,000 --> 00:42:55,520 Speaker 3: under Armor Performance Summit to oh my goodness, I just 752 00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:58,480 Speaker 3: feel like a handful of times now and hearing about 753 00:42:58,640 --> 00:43:01,000 Speaker 3: the clientele that you worked with, that you have an 754 00:43:01,000 --> 00:43:04,279 Speaker 3: impressive roster, and I think that something is to be said, 755 00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:08,120 Speaker 3: not just of course, by the fact that you've been 756 00:43:08,160 --> 00:43:10,759 Speaker 3: able to work with these individuals, but about the fact 757 00:43:10,760 --> 00:43:14,560 Speaker 3: that you're so I would argue good at what you do, 758 00:43:15,239 --> 00:43:20,239 Speaker 3: that you have become an important tool in the toolbox 759 00:43:20,320 --> 00:43:24,600 Speaker 3: for so many high performing individuals that many people listening 760 00:43:24,640 --> 00:43:26,640 Speaker 3: to this show would know who they are. 761 00:43:27,200 --> 00:43:30,960 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, well, first, thank you for the compliment, and 762 00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:32,840 Speaker 1: then I also appreciate you calling me a tool. 763 00:43:35,080 --> 00:43:36,320 Speaker 4: You are welcome the tool. 764 00:43:36,560 --> 00:43:40,640 Speaker 1: I'm a tool in the tool. Yeah. 765 00:43:40,880 --> 00:43:44,080 Speaker 3: Never have I ever called a guest a tool before. 766 00:43:44,840 --> 00:43:48,520 Speaker 1: It's perfect. I absolutely love all of it. And and 767 00:43:48,800 --> 00:43:51,879 Speaker 1: you know, like and I am because I am part 768 00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:55,960 Speaker 1: of like the the support mechanism for the for the 769 00:43:56,000 --> 00:44:00,400 Speaker 1: people in the amphitheater and so Okay, So that not 770 00:44:00,480 --> 00:44:03,799 Speaker 1: being too far from the joke here, is that, Yeah, 771 00:44:03,800 --> 00:44:08,360 Speaker 1: I've been fortunate, and I think part of where what 772 00:44:08,480 --> 00:44:12,080 Speaker 1: I represent with people is that there's far more to 773 00:44:12,120 --> 00:44:17,000 Speaker 1: go and I'm less interested in human the doing than 774 00:44:17,040 --> 00:44:20,600 Speaker 1: the being. And what I've come to learn is that 775 00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:26,200 Speaker 1: the most extraordinaries across multiple disciplines, and you know I 776 00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:29,280 Speaker 1: was this. You know, I've got a small team my business. 777 00:44:29,280 --> 00:44:30,960 Speaker 1: We have a small team and we get fined if 778 00:44:30,960 --> 00:44:34,160 Speaker 1: we name drop. Okay, So like it's like, you know, 779 00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:36,120 Speaker 1: it's a fun joke, like if someone's going to try 780 00:44:36,120 --> 00:44:38,200 Speaker 1: to big time and say like, oh, well, you know, 781 00:44:38,239 --> 00:44:40,400 Speaker 1: I had a conversation with fill in the blanks. Like 782 00:44:40,480 --> 00:44:45,000 Speaker 1: everyone rallies like, okay, you're getting nonsense, you know. So 783 00:44:45,000 --> 00:44:47,879 Speaker 1: so this was but this is cool because this person 784 00:44:47,880 --> 00:44:49,439 Speaker 1: when they announced that they're going to go on tour, 785 00:44:50,120 --> 00:44:54,080 Speaker 1: they'll sell out across the planet in fifteen minutes. And 786 00:44:54,160 --> 00:44:59,000 Speaker 1: so he says, I am far more interested in being 787 00:45:00,160 --> 00:45:03,840 Speaker 1: than doing, and so being more to do more is 788 00:45:03,880 --> 00:45:06,600 Speaker 1: where this idea was born from. So I think you 789 00:45:06,640 --> 00:45:08,719 Speaker 1: and I and many of us swallowed at a young 790 00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:11,640 Speaker 1: age this idea that we need to do the extraordinary 791 00:45:11,640 --> 00:45:14,640 Speaker 1: to be extraordinary, and I certainly did. I can't speak 792 00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:18,080 Speaker 1: for you, and so I had to undo that first 793 00:45:18,160 --> 00:45:20,960 Speaker 1: to say, no, I need to be me. I need 794 00:45:21,000 --> 00:45:24,080 Speaker 1: to be grounded, be present, be creative, be authentic, and 795 00:45:24,120 --> 00:45:27,680 Speaker 1: then let the doing flow from that place. And it's 796 00:45:27,719 --> 00:45:30,479 Speaker 1: almost like the lid opens up in this magical way, 797 00:45:30,719 --> 00:45:33,879 Speaker 1: and so I think that that's why, because I really 798 00:45:33,880 --> 00:45:35,880 Speaker 1: don't give a shit what they've done. I'm more interested 799 00:45:35,880 --> 00:45:37,320 Speaker 1: in who they are and who they want to become. 800 00:45:37,800 --> 00:45:40,040 Speaker 1: And so there's a little bit of a breath of 801 00:45:40,040 --> 00:45:42,880 Speaker 1: fresh air because you've been to a party when someone's 802 00:45:42,920 --> 00:45:44,759 Speaker 1: kind of like, oh, what do you do? And I 803 00:45:44,840 --> 00:45:47,319 Speaker 1: just want to go, the fuck are we doing here? 804 00:45:47,400 --> 00:45:49,239 Speaker 1: You know? And then they look over and they're looking 805 00:45:49,280 --> 00:45:51,560 Speaker 1: over my shoulder once they're like, oh, you know you're 806 00:45:51,560 --> 00:45:54,560 Speaker 1: a sports psychologist. Oh great, well where's the you know? 807 00:45:54,640 --> 00:45:57,560 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, well looking on the shoulder, like, where's the star? 808 00:45:58,000 --> 00:45:58,200 Speaker 1: You know. 809 00:45:58,280 --> 00:46:03,719 Speaker 3: I'm like, obviously, now people know of you, perhaps they 810 00:46:04,000 --> 00:46:08,080 Speaker 3: see a performance psychologist. When you look in the mirror, 811 00:46:08,400 --> 00:46:11,160 Speaker 3: what is it that you see looking back at you? 812 00:46:12,040 --> 00:46:18,400 Speaker 1: Oh, that's cool, cool question. I there's so many jokes 813 00:46:18,480 --> 00:46:19,160 Speaker 1: that I'll keep them. 814 00:46:19,120 --> 00:46:19,680 Speaker 3: All to myself. 815 00:46:19,760 --> 00:46:20,720 Speaker 2: Right now. 816 00:46:21,239 --> 00:46:25,600 Speaker 1: I will say that when I look I am, I'm 817 00:46:25,640 --> 00:46:31,759 Speaker 1: surprised by the places this body has been. But I 818 00:46:31,800 --> 00:46:40,440 Speaker 1: feel completely familiar with the spirit inside, so like it 819 00:46:40,680 --> 00:46:43,480 Speaker 1: feels at home when I look at myself, like I 820 00:46:44,320 --> 00:46:48,759 Speaker 1: am at peace with the inner workings of who I am. 821 00:46:49,160 --> 00:46:51,359 Speaker 1: But I'm like, when I look at the shell, I'm like, man, 822 00:46:51,400 --> 00:46:54,400 Speaker 1: you've been to some places. So I just don't I 823 00:46:54,480 --> 00:46:56,719 Speaker 1: never thought about the places and the environments that I've 824 00:46:56,719 --> 00:46:59,239 Speaker 1: been in that that would take place. And so there's 825 00:46:59,239 --> 00:47:03,120 Speaker 1: a sense of peace about the that is the residue, 826 00:47:03,160 --> 00:47:06,279 Speaker 1: if you will, of living with integrity. And I know 827 00:47:06,360 --> 00:47:08,880 Speaker 1: that I'm talking about me living with integrity, which is 828 00:47:08,920 --> 00:47:12,359 Speaker 1: a weird thing to say, but like I've been like 829 00:47:12,360 --> 00:47:14,080 Speaker 1: it's a good example. I don't have a friend that 830 00:47:14,160 --> 00:47:18,160 Speaker 1: cheats on their wife. And so I've been married since 831 00:47:18,200 --> 00:47:21,160 Speaker 1: I was twenty five, so almost like twenty let's see, 832 00:47:21,360 --> 00:47:23,160 Speaker 1: I'm forty nine now, so whatever the math is on 833 00:47:23,239 --> 00:47:28,239 Speaker 1: that almost twenty twenty years. Yeah, And and so like 834 00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:32,480 Speaker 1: I love that I've been completely faithful, and like I don't, 835 00:47:33,280 --> 00:47:37,400 Speaker 1: you know, like doing the right thing is so important 836 00:47:37,440 --> 00:47:40,640 Speaker 1: to me, So like those you know, my parents had 837 00:47:40,680 --> 00:47:43,200 Speaker 1: a good job of creating a good, strong moral foundation. 838 00:47:43,719 --> 00:47:46,920 Speaker 1: And then I love that I built the mental skills. 839 00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:50,120 Speaker 1: And I'm not perfect, but I love that I'm building 840 00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:53,640 Speaker 1: mental skills to be able to deal with high stress environments, 841 00:47:53,760 --> 00:47:55,759 Speaker 1: you know. And so I don't know, that's a long wave. 842 00:47:55,880 --> 00:47:58,359 Speaker 1: I've never really answered that, So it's a good question. 843 00:47:58,480 --> 00:48:00,360 Speaker 1: Thank you for that, of course. 844 00:48:00,719 --> 00:48:03,480 Speaker 3: I mean your explanation a little bit reminds me of 845 00:48:03,480 --> 00:48:06,440 Speaker 3: something that Angela Manuel Davis said to me that she 846 00:48:07,120 --> 00:48:11,920 Speaker 3: hopes to live in purpose on purpose. So when she 847 00:48:12,080 --> 00:48:14,560 Speaker 3: looks in the mirror, that is what she sees. She 848 00:48:14,600 --> 00:48:20,360 Speaker 3: sees a woman who is truly living her purpose very intentionally. 849 00:48:21,520 --> 00:48:23,000 Speaker 1: That's what's up. That's really cool. 850 00:48:23,600 --> 00:48:26,600 Speaker 3: That's what's up. That's what's up. What excites you right now, 851 00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:27,759 Speaker 3: doctor Jeriva. 852 00:48:28,320 --> 00:48:32,880 Speaker 1: Oh, we got formal. I think that the Decade of 853 00:48:32,880 --> 00:48:38,040 Speaker 1: the Mind twenty twenty rattled us, and so this next 854 00:48:38,080 --> 00:48:41,760 Speaker 1: decade is going to be about the mind because where 855 00:48:42,000 --> 00:48:44,879 Speaker 1: we've just been, we realize that we didn't have the capabilities, 856 00:48:44,920 --> 00:48:48,960 Speaker 1: the psychological capabilities to deal with such high stress change. 857 00:48:49,640 --> 00:48:51,800 Speaker 1: And so this next decade will be about the mind. 858 00:48:52,280 --> 00:48:56,680 Speaker 1: And I'm incredibly excited about where technology is going to 859 00:48:56,719 --> 00:49:00,000 Speaker 1: meet ancient wisdom. That is, we were having the extraordinary 860 00:49:00,239 --> 00:49:04,239 Speaker 1: raise their hands to say the mind matters. You know, 861 00:49:04,320 --> 00:49:06,600 Speaker 1: everyone from the folks that you mentioned to so many 862 00:49:06,600 --> 00:49:09,319 Speaker 1: others are raising their hands saying invest in your inner life. 863 00:49:10,000 --> 00:49:13,759 Speaker 1: And so this next decade of the mind is going 864 00:49:13,800 --> 00:49:17,200 Speaker 1: to be radical, and I'm super excited. I'm bullish on 865 00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:22,719 Speaker 1: human flourishing. I think that through relationships with ourselves, then 866 00:49:22,760 --> 00:49:27,120 Speaker 1: with others and with mother Nature, we are going to 867 00:49:27,120 --> 00:49:30,600 Speaker 1: reimagine what it means to be human. And so this 868 00:49:30,680 --> 00:49:34,000 Speaker 1: next decade of the mind is what excites me right now. 869 00:49:34,200 --> 00:49:37,600 Speaker 3: If I was to give you an opportunity to double 870 00:49:37,640 --> 00:49:41,919 Speaker 3: click on something that maybe you would have double clicked 871 00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:44,040 Speaker 3: on a little bit sooner in our conversation, and you 872 00:49:44,080 --> 00:49:47,160 Speaker 3: think about something that could be really beneficial to shed 873 00:49:47,160 --> 00:49:49,960 Speaker 3: some light on, where does your mind go with that. 874 00:49:51,120 --> 00:49:55,120 Speaker 1: Like for a skill or a tool for folks, like 875 00:49:55,160 --> 00:50:00,239 Speaker 1: where we double ca Yeah, I would think the one 876 00:50:00,280 --> 00:50:04,640 Speaker 1: of the great bits of work as a human, you know, philosophy. 877 00:50:04,680 --> 00:50:07,040 Speaker 1: I'm sorry purpose we did let me hit on philosophy 878 00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:09,800 Speaker 1: because we haven't talked about it. And so having a 879 00:50:09,840 --> 00:50:16,600 Speaker 1: philosophy is really clarity of your guiding principles. So what 880 00:50:16,600 --> 00:50:19,840 Speaker 1: are the principles that guide your thoughts, your words, and 881 00:50:19,880 --> 00:50:25,440 Speaker 1: your actions, and that bit of work. It's substantial, and 882 00:50:25,520 --> 00:50:27,880 Speaker 1: so I would like to kind of double click to 883 00:50:27,960 --> 00:50:34,840 Speaker 1: use your language on writing down your core philosophy, your 884 00:50:34,840 --> 00:50:37,200 Speaker 1: guiding principles. Maybe it takes ten pages at first, and 885 00:50:37,239 --> 00:50:38,840 Speaker 1: then you whittle it down, whittle it down, whittle it 886 00:50:38,920 --> 00:50:42,520 Speaker 1: down to get to something that's like twelve words or less. 887 00:50:44,160 --> 00:50:47,040 Speaker 1: What are the principles that are going to guide your thoughts, 888 00:50:47,040 --> 00:50:49,719 Speaker 1: words and actions so that when you run to the 889 00:50:49,760 --> 00:50:53,359 Speaker 1: thin herd, the edge of the frontier, and when you're 890 00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:56,680 Speaker 1: running in that high stress space, that you're able to 891 00:50:56,920 --> 00:50:59,480 Speaker 1: have clarity ahead of time. This is how I'm going 892 00:50:59,520 --> 00:51:03,200 Speaker 1: to guide my thoughts, words and actions, And that kind 893 00:51:03,200 --> 00:51:06,960 Speaker 1: of pre work I think pays dividends. So along with purpose, 894 00:51:07,080 --> 00:51:11,080 Speaker 1: philosophy is equally is important. But then maybe that feels 895 00:51:11,080 --> 00:51:15,040 Speaker 1: heavy and big and emily I'd say that a practice 896 00:51:15,360 --> 00:51:19,279 Speaker 1: of long exhales would be Yeah, it would be something 897 00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:23,759 Speaker 1: more thin, sliced, more manageable. But you can't really do 898 00:51:23,880 --> 00:51:26,359 Speaker 1: like a little band aid thing with long exhales if 899 00:51:26,680 --> 00:51:29,480 Speaker 1: your mind's constantly worrying about the future and you don't 900 00:51:29,480 --> 00:51:31,680 Speaker 1: know your purpose fill in the blank. So, but a 901 00:51:31,719 --> 00:51:35,440 Speaker 1: practice of long exhales, to over simplify the science of breathing, 902 00:51:35,960 --> 00:51:38,440 Speaker 1: does send signals to our brain that right now we're okay. 903 00:51:39,280 --> 00:51:41,680 Speaker 1: And if you think about like there's four parts to 904 00:51:41,680 --> 00:51:44,920 Speaker 1: every breath, that maybe what we would do is We 905 00:51:44,960 --> 00:51:48,680 Speaker 1: would say, start with a cadence something like six in 906 00:51:48,960 --> 00:51:54,160 Speaker 1: six hold, twelve out six hold and something like that 907 00:51:54,400 --> 00:52:00,000 Speaker 1: will materially make a difference across people's ability to downregular 908 00:52:01,280 --> 00:52:04,760 Speaker 1: and stress is an up regulator, but I need practices 909 00:52:04,800 --> 00:52:07,960 Speaker 1: to help downregulate. And doing ten of those in a 910 00:52:08,040 --> 00:52:11,680 Speaker 1: row as a training wheels, you know, six, six, twelve, 911 00:52:11,760 --> 00:52:15,200 Speaker 1: six ten times would be a nice little fin slized practice. 912 00:52:15,480 --> 00:52:18,400 Speaker 3: You say, philosophy, and for a listener that hears that, 913 00:52:18,680 --> 00:52:20,560 Speaker 3: and they hear you explain it, and they start to 914 00:52:20,560 --> 00:52:23,440 Speaker 3: get their wheels turning, and they're not exactly sure still 915 00:52:24,120 --> 00:52:27,399 Speaker 3: how to go about creating that philosophy? What else would 916 00:52:27,400 --> 00:52:30,480 Speaker 3: you tell that? Maybe perhaps if you could provide an example. 917 00:52:31,480 --> 00:52:35,000 Speaker 1: Sure, well, okay, that's great, we'll do both. 918 00:52:35,640 --> 00:52:38,480 Speaker 2: Yeah, what is let's do? 919 00:52:38,920 --> 00:52:42,400 Speaker 1: Doctor King, Doctor Martin Luther King Jr. You know what 920 00:52:42,440 --> 00:52:47,440 Speaker 1: would you say? His philosophy is equality period, right, So 921 00:52:47,640 --> 00:52:52,200 Speaker 1: everywhere he went, his thoughts, his words, and his actions 922 00:52:52,239 --> 00:52:56,839 Speaker 1: were about moving the narrative of equality. So that's a philosophy. 923 00:52:57,120 --> 00:52:59,800 Speaker 1: And then his life purpose was he called it a dream, 924 00:53:00,400 --> 00:53:03,840 Speaker 1: but his life purpose was to see that in a 925 00:53:03,880 --> 00:53:08,239 Speaker 1: certain form. But his philosophy was really about listening. My 926 00:53:08,320 --> 00:53:10,279 Speaker 1: thoughts and words and actions need to be lined up 927 00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:14,480 Speaker 1: about helping people, you know, live with equality. And so 928 00:53:15,200 --> 00:53:16,600 Speaker 1: we can go down the list of some of the 929 00:53:16,640 --> 00:53:22,799 Speaker 1: greats that you know, Muhammad, Jesus, Buddha, Confucian, like, we 930 00:53:22,880 --> 00:53:25,880 Speaker 1: know their philosophies and because that's how they showed up 931 00:53:25,880 --> 00:53:29,160 Speaker 1: everywhere they went. And so the same is available for 932 00:53:29,520 --> 00:53:33,879 Speaker 1: you and me to do that work. And so how 933 00:53:33,880 --> 00:53:35,680 Speaker 1: do you do it? This is going to sound like 934 00:53:35,680 --> 00:53:37,520 Speaker 1: a cheesy plug, but I know we're up on time. 935 00:53:38,200 --> 00:53:40,880 Speaker 1: I built an eight week online course to help people 936 00:53:40,960 --> 00:53:42,720 Speaker 1: do all of this work to pull back the curtain, 937 00:53:42,760 --> 00:53:46,080 Speaker 1: to show people exactly how I work with the lead 938 00:53:46,120 --> 00:53:48,359 Speaker 1: athletes and executives and artists on how they can train 939 00:53:48,560 --> 00:53:50,280 Speaker 1: how they train their mind. So you can do the same. 940 00:53:51,000 --> 00:53:54,359 Speaker 1: And so but there's no shortcuts, and I'm not going 941 00:53:54,400 --> 00:53:57,280 Speaker 1: to hold anything back, but to do the work sometimes 942 00:53:57,280 --> 00:54:00,799 Speaker 1: takes cadence and timing. And in that course, you know 943 00:54:00,960 --> 00:54:05,680 Speaker 1: this is fundamently we have we have two Olympians that 944 00:54:05,719 --> 00:54:09,120 Speaker 1: coach you, medalists that coach you along the way, and 945 00:54:09,160 --> 00:54:11,080 Speaker 1: two sports hikes that coach you along the way. To 946 00:54:11,680 --> 00:54:13,319 Speaker 1: get in there and put a dull stick on your 947 00:54:13,320 --> 00:54:15,280 Speaker 1: back and say, hey, you said you paid the money, 948 00:54:15,280 --> 00:54:17,480 Speaker 1: you signed up, Let's go do the work. How can 949 00:54:17,520 --> 00:54:18,440 Speaker 1: I help you? 950 00:54:18,440 --> 00:54:18,640 Speaker 3: You know? 951 00:54:18,840 --> 00:54:20,680 Speaker 1: Like so it's that part's really cool. 952 00:54:20,760 --> 00:54:23,239 Speaker 3: All right, So last little bit here. You have an 953 00:54:23,239 --> 00:54:28,840 Speaker 3: opportunity right now to offer Let's go back to high school. 954 00:54:28,920 --> 00:54:31,279 Speaker 3: Let's go back to the guy that used to be 955 00:54:31,360 --> 00:54:34,960 Speaker 3: in a place where he would see that big wave 956 00:54:35,040 --> 00:54:38,799 Speaker 3: in competition and not know what the hell to do 957 00:54:38,920 --> 00:54:41,919 Speaker 3: how to perform. You have an opportunity right now looking 958 00:54:41,960 --> 00:54:44,239 Speaker 3: back on that guy to give him one piece of 959 00:54:44,320 --> 00:54:48,879 Speaker 3: advice going through those hurtle moments. What do you tell him? 960 00:54:50,160 --> 00:54:53,919 Speaker 1: That's cool? If I go big picture for a minute, 961 00:54:53,920 --> 00:54:56,200 Speaker 1: and then I'll drop into the wave thing. Big picture is 962 00:54:56,320 --> 00:55:02,799 Speaker 1: like nice job, dude, Keep going, you know, like keep going, 963 00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:09,320 Speaker 1: you know. And so I've made mistakes. I've had unfortunate 964 00:55:09,320 --> 00:55:12,640 Speaker 1: things that have happened to me, things that I've created, 965 00:55:12,800 --> 00:55:15,680 Speaker 1: co created, you know, all of it, and all of 966 00:55:15,680 --> 00:55:20,160 Speaker 1: the scar tissue and the pain that I've experienced. It 967 00:55:20,160 --> 00:55:23,120 Speaker 1: has come around for gratitude. So I'm okay with all 968 00:55:23,400 --> 00:55:25,879 Speaker 1: the mistakes that you know, and so as to keep going. 969 00:55:26,440 --> 00:55:30,719 Speaker 1: And so that's the life thing. And then the wave 970 00:55:30,800 --> 00:55:34,440 Speaker 1: thing is like, who gives a shit what they think? 971 00:55:36,160 --> 00:55:40,680 Speaker 1: Be true to yourself, dude, you know, paddle in, push hard, 972 00:55:41,360 --> 00:55:43,960 Speaker 1: pop and go like be absorbed in what you're doing 973 00:55:44,000 --> 00:55:48,120 Speaker 1: and stop caring so much about what they think, and 974 00:55:48,160 --> 00:55:50,279 Speaker 1: so that that would be the best kind of gem 975 00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:53,120 Speaker 1: I do. It would have been nice to learn that earlier, 976 00:55:53,120 --> 00:55:57,239 Speaker 1: but I probably needed to have that internal scratchiness for 977 00:55:57,280 --> 00:55:59,239 Speaker 1: so long to get to the truth of it. 978 00:56:00,120 --> 00:56:02,560 Speaker 3: So grateful for your time today. I am sitting here 979 00:56:02,640 --> 00:56:04,640 Speaker 3: like I'll probably be sitting here for another thirty minutes 980 00:56:04,719 --> 00:56:07,920 Speaker 3: digesting all of this, and I'm sure the hurdlers will 981 00:56:07,920 --> 00:56:11,640 Speaker 3: probably feel the same way. At Doctor gerva How do 982 00:56:11,680 --> 00:56:13,600 Speaker 3: the hurdlers keep up with you? How can they follow 983 00:56:13,640 --> 00:56:16,440 Speaker 3: along with you? Give me all the details? 984 00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:18,960 Speaker 1: Can I be a hurdler too? I love it? 985 00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:21,960 Speaker 3: Yeah, please please be a hurdler. Invite the squad. 986 00:56:22,440 --> 00:56:26,279 Speaker 1: Yeah, that is so good. Social is fun and so 987 00:56:26,320 --> 00:56:30,000 Speaker 1: I'm enjoying it. At Michael Gervais and that's g E. 988 00:56:30,160 --> 00:56:34,799 Speaker 1: R v ai s. It's on Insta, LinkedIn, Twitter and 989 00:56:34,840 --> 00:56:38,560 Speaker 1: then finding masters the podcast and so that has been 990 00:56:39,000 --> 00:56:42,399 Speaker 1: a great way to you know, we're building out some 991 00:56:42,960 --> 00:56:45,520 Speaker 1: membership model. So there's deeper engagement there, so finding Masters 992 00:56:45,560 --> 00:56:48,760 Speaker 1: the podcast, and then you can actually wrote a book. 993 00:56:48,800 --> 00:56:50,479 Speaker 1: And so if people want to check out the book, 994 00:56:50,520 --> 00:56:52,640 Speaker 1: but I would say the course is kind of if 995 00:56:52,640 --> 00:56:55,480 Speaker 1: you really want to invest in what you're doing, the 996 00:56:55,520 --> 00:56:57,360 Speaker 1: course is the best way to go. But the website 997 00:56:57,440 --> 00:57:03,440 Speaker 1: is Findingmastery dot Net. Of the book Compete to Create, 998 00:57:03,880 --> 00:57:05,759 Speaker 1: and the idea is like, you got to work your 999 00:57:05,800 --> 00:57:08,640 Speaker 1: ass off to create a living masterpiece, and so we 1000 00:57:08,680 --> 00:57:10,279 Speaker 1: will show you how to work your ass off. But 1001 00:57:10,320 --> 00:57:13,240 Speaker 1: it's really about recovery and internal wellness. 1002 00:57:13,640 --> 00:57:15,840 Speaker 3: Thank you so much for your time today. Again, I 1003 00:57:15,880 --> 00:57:18,680 Speaker 3: appreciate it so so so much, awesome. 1004 00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:19,160 Speaker 1: Thank you. 1005 00:57:19,320 --> 00:57:22,320 Speaker 3: I'm over at Emilia Body and at Hurdle Podcast. Another 1006 00:57:22,400 --> 00:57:25,080 Speaker 3: hurdle conquered. Catch you guys next time.