WEBVTT - Preparing For High School

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<v Speaker 1>We got a high school of y'all, and I'm nervous

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<v Speaker 1>as hell.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm literally day by day fighting back tears. We're about

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<v Speaker 2>to have. Yeah, I look at Jackson and I want

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<v Speaker 2>to cry every day. I can't believe we're here. It's insane.

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<v Speaker 3>It all started with real talk, unfiltered, honest and straight

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<v Speaker 3>from the heart. Since then, we've gone on to become

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<v Speaker 3>Webby Award winning podcasters in New York Times bestselling authors.

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<v Speaker 2>Dead Ass was more than a podcast for us. It

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<v Speaker 2>was about our growth, a place where we could be vulnerable, be.

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<v Speaker 1>Wraw or but most apportly be us.

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<v Speaker 2>But as we know, life keeps evolving and so do we,

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<v Speaker 2>and through it all, one thing has never changed. This

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<v Speaker 2>is because we got a lot to talk about.

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<v Speaker 1>Story time.

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<v Speaker 3>My oldest son is first of all, he's amazing. But

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<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna tell you something that happened to me the

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<v Speaker 3>other day. I'm gonna flash y'all back to yesterday because.

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<v Speaker 1>It didn't happen that long ago.

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<v Speaker 3>I get out the bedroom and I walk down to

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<v Speaker 3>where you're always standing there making breakfast, and this shadowy

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<v Speaker 3>figure comes over my shoulder while I'm hugging you, and

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<v Speaker 3>all I hear, is your chill?

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<v Speaker 1>Let my finish making breakfast.

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<v Speaker 3>And I looked over and he was like looking at

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<v Speaker 3>me eye to eye with that curly frow, and then

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<v Speaker 3>put his hand on my shoulder and I was like, yo,

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<v Speaker 3>you're like a little man, Like you're my size now.

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<v Speaker 3>And it was in that moment that I realized, like,

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<v Speaker 3>I have to start teaching my son what to be

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<v Speaker 3>prepared for walking out in the world as a young man,

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<v Speaker 3>because people are gonna view him as a young man

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<v Speaker 3>now he's no longer a boy. And it hit me

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<v Speaker 3>like yesterday, like, first of all, he's gonna be taller

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<v Speaker 3>than me, which I'm excited about. Like the minute he's

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<v Speaker 3>talling at me, I'm gonna jump on his back and

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<v Speaker 3>tell him he got carry me everywhere.

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<v Speaker 2>But that is insanity. For me, it was I don't

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<v Speaker 2>you don't really do story time. But for me, it

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<v Speaker 2>was taking him to get his permit. He turned fifteen,

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<v Speaker 2>and he was like, Wow, I'm studying for my permit

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<v Speaker 2>and I was like, permission to do? What are you crazy?

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<v Speaker 2>And yeah. I took him to the DMV and gathered

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<v Speaker 2>all the paperwork I had to do a slide show

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<v Speaker 2>for his eighth grade promotion ceremony, pulling up baby pittures

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<v Speaker 2>and that there, and I'm about to get my period,

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<v Speaker 2>so you know, my my emotions are on like a thousand.

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<v Speaker 3>That right there is why these conversations need to be had.

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<v Speaker 3>That driving being in high school with other kids that

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<v Speaker 3>are driving a lot of conversations that need to be had.

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<v Speaker 2>All right, let me let me give me gather my

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<v Speaker 2>thoughts and my emotions. All right, karaoke time.

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<v Speaker 3>This was very simple. We're still in that era of MJ.

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<v Speaker 3>I know it's a little bit later on in the year,

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<v Speaker 3>but this is an MJ summer. So once I start

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<v Speaker 3>this song, you already know what it's gonna be. Doom doom, doom, doom,

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<v Speaker 3>doom doom doom, doom, doom doom doom doomdoom, damn dun damn.

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<v Speaker 1>Pause your buddy's mine.

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<v Speaker 3>You gotta pause that before you say that. You have

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<v Speaker 3>to because did you hear the story about why Prince

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<v Speaker 3>didn't do the song with Michael Jackson.

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<v Speaker 4>I'm good.

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<v Speaker 3>Prince said that it was presented to him that he

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<v Speaker 3>was supposed to be in the video, right, and then

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<v Speaker 3>he was cool with it. You know what, I'm saying

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<v Speaker 3>even though they had their little bit of a competitive

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<v Speaker 3>bet back in the day, but he said when he

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<v Speaker 3>heard the song, he said, well, who's saying that to

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<v Speaker 3>Who are you saying that to me? Because I definitely

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<v Speaker 3>ain't saying that to you, And he backed down on it.

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<v Speaker 3>So I knew if Prince had to pause song.

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<v Speaker 5>Why did Prince pause?

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<v Speaker 1>Exactly?

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<v Speaker 3>That's why I had to preemptively positive Prince who walked

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<v Speaker 3>around with his butt cheeks.

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<v Speaker 1>I was gonna pause that. I know, I gotta pause it.

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<v Speaker 2>Walked around with his budgets.

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<v Speaker 1>He did though. That was a part of his thing,

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<v Speaker 1>was he had the cheeks out.

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<v Speaker 3>I love it, you know, which kills me today, how

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<v Speaker 3>like older men will talk about this generation and be like,

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<v Speaker 3>this generation do stuff that's questionable.

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<v Speaker 1>Y'all all love Prince and Prince walked.

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<v Speaker 3>Around with his cheeks out, but y'all talk about our

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<v Speaker 3>artists is questionable.

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<v Speaker 2>And he was getting them chicks too.

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<v Speaker 3>Prince was getting older. She do not leave your girl around, Prince.

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<v Speaker 3>It is no longer your girl, they said.

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<v Speaker 1>Don't let her.

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<v Speaker 3>Don't let him look her in the eye or say

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<v Speaker 3>anything to her with that devoice.

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<v Speaker 1>She's gone.

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<v Speaker 3>You think Prince would have stolen you from me out

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<v Speaker 3>of what Prince size don't need to answer me and Prince.

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<v Speaker 1>The biggest la skin fight ever.

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<v Speaker 3>Took my belt off, been like Prince man like, listen,

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<v Speaker 3>don't be looking at I'm sure you whos king.

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<v Speaker 1>You're the prince, but I'm the King.

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<v Speaker 2>All right, y'all, we're gonna take a break and we'll

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<v Speaker 2>be back with Op or no Op stick.

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<v Speaker 1>Around all right, I got my pad already.

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<v Speaker 5>Pads up, all right, Oper Nop.

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<v Speaker 6>Something we have to talk about is how the Supreme

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<v Speaker 6>Court recently made changes to the nineteen sixty five Voting Act.

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<v Speaker 5>And we got to.

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<v Speaker 6>Be honest that they want slavery. They want to bring

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<v Speaker 6>back slavery.

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<v Speaker 5>They're doing it. Little by little, they're finding way, they're

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<v Speaker 5>finding way.

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<v Speaker 6>So recently what has happened is they made a change

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<v Speaker 6>to the Voting Right Act that weakens the law by

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<v Speaker 6>restricting the use of majority minority districts, which basically makes

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<v Speaker 6>it so that representation can actually represent like proportionately the

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<v Speaker 6>Demographics Act, that's what it's supposed to do. So now

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<v Speaker 6>they're calling that racial entitlement, whereas the real issue and

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<v Speaker 6>why that even had to be presented in a Voting

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<v Speaker 6>Rights Act. Is because districts would section off voting areas

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<v Speaker 6>to make it so that, you know, their candidates would win,

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<v Speaker 6>so that they could uphold Jim Crow, so that they

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<v Speaker 6>could uphold discrimination. And this part of the Voting Right

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<v Speaker 6>Acts makes it more fair so that voting districts reflect

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<v Speaker 6>the actual population in that district.

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<v Speaker 5>And now that can't be done.

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<v Speaker 3>For example, in Louisiana, Louisiana, I think they're forty of

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<v Speaker 3>the population is black.

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<v Speaker 1>But now in Louisiana they have like two congressmen.

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<v Speaker 6>Yeah, and Louisiana is who brought this case to the

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<v Speaker 6>Supreme Court just nuts.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 6>And they also want to make it so that private

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<v Speaker 6>plaintiffs can't bring lawsuits, so that they cannot what do

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<v Speaker 6>you call it, challenge laws like this.

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<v Speaker 2>Get me out of here.

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<v Speaker 1>This is my op. I'm gonna give you all a

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<v Speaker 1>little brief history lesson.

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<v Speaker 2>Oh we love a history lesson.

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<v Speaker 3>In eighteen sixty five, they announced that all blacks were free, right,

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<v Speaker 3>eighteen sixty five, remember that right? In eighteen sixty seven

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<v Speaker 3>they enacted the Vagrancy Act. The Vagrancy Act meant that

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<v Speaker 3>if you couldn't read you couldn't write, you didn't own property.

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<v Speaker 3>You are now property of the state and considered a

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<v Speaker 3>vagrant and were then used for convict leasing to private

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<v Speaker 3>places for ultimately slavery. So ultimately they said, hey, we're

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<v Speaker 3>going to free all the slaves, and then for the

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<v Speaker 3>past three hundred plus years, we're going to tell y'all

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<v Speaker 3>that it's illegal for you as a slave to read

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<v Speaker 3>or write or own property. Now we're going to free

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<v Speaker 3>you and then make it illegal that you don't know

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<v Speaker 3>how to read, write, or own property, and then put

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<v Speaker 3>you back into custody of the state.

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<v Speaker 1>To where you have to work for free. This is America.

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<v Speaker 3>The reason why I'm telling this story is because this

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<v Speaker 3>is what America has always done.

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<v Speaker 1>Found a way to change the rules and the law so.

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<v Speaker 3>They can continue to disenfranchise us as black people. We

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<v Speaker 3>saw York. It was two thousand and I believe twelve

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<v Speaker 3>when they decided they were trying to change the We

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<v Speaker 3>were in Crown Heights and they were rezoning everything in

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<v Speaker 3>Crown Heights when they were going through all the different

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<v Speaker 3>changes and how they were going to call Crown Heights

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<v Speaker 3>was going to be Remsen Village and Clinton Hills but

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<v Speaker 3>we started noticing, and this is when I started speaking

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<v Speaker 3>to my aldermen, that they were rezoning everything and all

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<v Speaker 3>of the finances were going to certain synagogues while finances

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<v Speaker 3>were being taken away from certain public housing in certain places.

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<v Speaker 2>That Yeah, I remember, remember we had to go to

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<v Speaker 2>those meetings.

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<v Speaker 1>We had to go to Yeah, that's why.

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<v Speaker 2>It's so important to be involved in your local election

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<v Speaker 2>in the local government because and.

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<v Speaker 3>When you ask the questions as to why the rezoning

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<v Speaker 3>is happening, they never give you a straightforward answer. And

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<v Speaker 3>so we had to do this because of this, this, that,

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<v Speaker 3>And you go back and looking and you're like, wait,

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<v Speaker 3>y'all took four million dollars from every public school that

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<v Speaker 3>was in that area, and now you have all of

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<v Speaker 3>us being rezoned to have to go to that public

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<v Speaker 3>school after you just took four million dollars annually. They've

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<v Speaker 3>always done this. This is not a surprise to me.

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah. I remember when we were looking for schools for

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<v Speaker 2>Jackson when he was about to start school, and I

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<v Speaker 2>was like, so you're telling me I'm forced to have

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<v Speaker 2>to send my child to this school. So that's where

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<v Speaker 2>technically zoned there. We started looking for school yeah, around

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<v Speaker 2>twenty twelve, thirteen, because he was about two three.

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<v Speaker 1>Yeah, it's infurial. I'm not gonna lie.

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<v Speaker 3>It is infuriating that this always like this is always

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<v Speaker 3>the case and they playing our face.

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<v Speaker 5>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 6>And the reason why any of this has happened is

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<v Speaker 6>because of the fear of losing white supremacy as the land,

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<v Speaker 6>the law of the land, and that I feel like

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<v Speaker 6>the catalyst for that, this like increased fear was Barack

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<v Speaker 6>Obama being president for eight years because what we thought, voters,

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<v Speaker 6>I mean personally, what I thought Barack Obama would do,

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<v Speaker 6>and obviously what white people thought Barack Obama would do

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<v Speaker 6>was to enact laws that help you know, black black people,

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<v Speaker 6>and he didn't at all. He did not at all,

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<v Speaker 6>And so then they took it upon themselves to do

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<v Speaker 6>exactly what they thought he was gonna do for themselves.

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<v Speaker 6>So now they're doing they're making all of these crazy

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<v Speaker 6>changes to voting so that they can stay in power

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<v Speaker 6>because they realized their fear, like they came up with

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<v Speaker 6>a plan like, oh shit, if he does this, niggas, yes,

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<v Speaker 6>but we if we do it, we can stay in power.

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<v Speaker 6>It feels nefarious in that way, and I said this

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<v Speaker 6>before on the podcast, and you devaluely like, no, that's

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<v Speaker 6>not fair, and of course it's not fair. But I'm

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<v Speaker 6>hella mad at Barack, like you could have been a

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<v Speaker 6>black fanther in the White House and you chose to

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<v Speaker 6>be an actual Democrat, Like where was the niggas at?

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<v Speaker 3>You know what, I'm gonna be honest with you at

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<v Speaker 3>when when you first said it, I did say, like,

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<v Speaker 3>this isn't like we can't put that on him because

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<v Speaker 3>he can't go in there and just do whatever you

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<v Speaker 3>want to do. But to watch this guy be in

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<v Speaker 3>there and just do whatever.

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<v Speaker 5>You want to do, it's like he can but a question.

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<v Speaker 1>That's what I was.

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<v Speaker 5>Out.

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<v Speaker 1>That's what I'm saying. Could have he couldn't do.

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<v Speaker 2>You wore a khaki suit and they were in an

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<v Speaker 2>uproar that one time. He wore a tend right.

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<v Speaker 5>But everybody's in an uproar.

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<v Speaker 4>About doing this stuff because everybody's complicit with him.

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<v Speaker 1>But everybody's in an uproa is complicent with him.

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<v Speaker 6>Congress is in Congress is complicit. The powers that be

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<v Speaker 6>you know, on your side, are but the people are not.

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<v Speaker 6>You know what I'm saying, Most of the people don't

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<v Speaker 6>agree with what is happening, and I feel like, I mean.

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<v Speaker 3>Well, he disenfranchised the people too. You know, you hear

0:11:46.160 --> 0:11:48.800
<v Speaker 3>them saying right now that white people are the new niggas.

0:11:49.920 --> 0:11:51.679
<v Speaker 1>Look at all of the stuff that white people are

0:11:51.760 --> 0:11:55.040
<v Speaker 1>upset about them. White people now.

0:11:54.960 --> 0:11:57.720
<v Speaker 3>Upset a Trump for stuff that happening to black people

0:11:58.600 --> 0:12:01.240
<v Speaker 3>for centuries. That's that's why when they're just like, you know,

0:12:01.240 --> 0:12:02.520
<v Speaker 3>black people, you're not saying much.

0:12:03.040 --> 0:12:04.280
<v Speaker 1>Well, this this.

0:12:04.320 --> 0:12:06.840
<v Speaker 3>America that y'all seeing, where he promised y'all he wouldn't

0:12:06.880 --> 0:12:09.000
<v Speaker 3>do things and are doing things to y'all, is something

0:12:09.000 --> 0:12:11.400
<v Speaker 3>that we've had to deal with. Yeah, we've survived it forever,

0:12:11.960 --> 0:12:14.040
<v Speaker 3>so this don't feel much different. That's why I'm saying,

0:12:14.080 --> 0:12:16.400
<v Speaker 3>I went back to the black codes. You can go

0:12:16.480 --> 0:12:20.120
<v Speaker 3>back to mass incarceration. They free once again. After the

0:12:20.240 --> 0:12:22.959
<v Speaker 3>nineteen sixties, we had the civil rights movement. Oh, black people,

0:12:23.280 --> 0:12:25.960
<v Speaker 3>everything's equal. Then here come the seventies and eighties and

0:12:25.960 --> 0:12:28.040
<v Speaker 3>mass incarceration and the war on drugs.

0:12:28.240 --> 0:12:30.720
<v Speaker 1>They always find a way after they say we gave

0:12:30.800 --> 0:12:31.400
<v Speaker 1>y'all this.

0:12:32.040 --> 0:12:34.280
<v Speaker 3>They always find a way to snatch it all back

0:12:34.360 --> 0:12:36.680
<v Speaker 3>and say, well, what we gave y'all wasn't fair. Yeah,

0:12:36.760 --> 0:12:39.040
<v Speaker 3>you know what I'm saying, Like this has always been

0:12:39.080 --> 0:12:40.679
<v Speaker 3>the case. If you read w Eb the boy he

0:12:40.720 --> 0:12:43.559
<v Speaker 3>says the same thing. He says, there's a history with

0:12:44.240 --> 0:12:48.000
<v Speaker 3>white people and white supremacy in this country that they're

0:12:48.160 --> 0:12:53.080
<v Speaker 3>there's always a black savior quote unquote, and then after

0:12:53.120 --> 0:12:55.720
<v Speaker 3>the black savior comes, they punish all black people for

0:12:55.800 --> 0:12:59.160
<v Speaker 3>the black savior. So you think about Malcolm and Martin

0:12:59.360 --> 0:13:01.600
<v Speaker 3>and then they punish with mass incarceration. Then you have

0:13:01.640 --> 0:13:04.559
<v Speaker 3>Barack Obama, then you punish us again. You think about

0:13:04.880 --> 0:13:07.679
<v Speaker 3>eighteen sixty five and quote unquote Lincoln was supposed to

0:13:07.760 --> 0:13:09.960
<v Speaker 3>be that and WB the Boyce was there to help

0:13:10.960 --> 0:13:12.640
<v Speaker 3>usher in a new America.

0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:15.600
<v Speaker 1>And then after that you get black codes and you

0:13:15.640 --> 0:13:16.520
<v Speaker 1>get lynchings.

0:13:16.880 --> 0:13:19.080
<v Speaker 3>You know what I'm saying. He talked about it. This

0:13:19.200 --> 0:13:21.320
<v Speaker 3>is part of white supremacy. You give them a little bit,

0:13:21.360 --> 0:13:23.800
<v Speaker 3>then you take a lot. So this doesn't surprise me.

0:13:24.080 --> 0:13:26.319
<v Speaker 3>We as a people just have to be prepared because

0:13:26.320 --> 0:13:27.160
<v Speaker 3>we've lived through this.

0:13:28.400 --> 0:13:33.840
<v Speaker 6>Yeah, there's a We had her on the show, Lenee Venet.

0:13:34.200 --> 0:13:36.560
<v Speaker 5>Yes, she said something.

0:13:36.559 --> 0:13:39.120
<v Speaker 6>I cannot remember exactly what she said, but basically it's

0:13:39.120 --> 0:13:40.839
<v Speaker 6>something that I've been thinking for a long time. It's

0:13:40.840 --> 0:13:44.240
<v Speaker 6>like racism is just the tool that they use in

0:13:44.320 --> 0:13:46.280
<v Speaker 6>order to get people on their side to stay in power.

0:13:46.360 --> 0:13:49.160
<v Speaker 6>Like these people really don't care about raised body.

0:13:49.280 --> 0:13:49.680
<v Speaker 1>They don't.

0:13:49.720 --> 0:13:53.240
<v Speaker 6>But if you think about it, right before Trump's election,

0:13:53.440 --> 0:13:57.120
<v Speaker 6>there was the Supreme Court challenge for.

0:13:59.160 --> 0:13:59.280
<v Speaker 1>It.

0:13:59.320 --> 0:14:04.480
<v Speaker 5>I first came up. What is it called college admissions.

0:14:04.840 --> 0:14:05.640
<v Speaker 1>I'm trying to remember.

0:14:05.679 --> 0:14:06.480
<v Speaker 5>The girl from.

0:14:06.320 --> 0:14:09.520
<v Speaker 6>Texas took her case all the way to the Supreme

0:14:09.559 --> 0:14:11.800
<v Speaker 6>Court because she said she didn't get into the University

0:14:11.840 --> 0:14:15.520
<v Speaker 6>of Texas because she was a white Remember, And what

0:14:15.600 --> 0:14:19.520
<v Speaker 6>I learned about Clarence Thomas's career is that his career

0:14:19.640 --> 0:14:25.440
<v Speaker 6>started by lobbying against seat belt laws. And he worked

0:14:25.440 --> 0:14:28.000
<v Speaker 6>at the EEOC, which didn't have anything to do with

0:14:28.000 --> 0:14:32.200
<v Speaker 6>seatbelt laws, but there was a Republican person in power

0:14:32.240 --> 0:14:35.120
<v Speaker 6>who was trying to make it so that the seat

0:14:35.120 --> 0:14:37.800
<v Speaker 6>belt laws or seatbelt bills didn't go into law because

0:14:38.120 --> 0:14:39.680
<v Speaker 6>back in the day, you didn't have to wear a.

0:14:39.600 --> 0:14:40.520
<v Speaker 1>Seat belt, I know.

0:14:44.160 --> 0:14:47.440
<v Speaker 6>And so they got Clarence Thomas involved, and that's how

0:14:47.440 --> 0:14:51.160
<v Speaker 6>he became kind of a Republican. I think all all

0:14:51.480 --> 0:14:54.000
<v Speaker 6>the time before that he was kind of just nonpartisan

0:14:54.160 --> 0:14:56.720
<v Speaker 6>because as a judge or as a lawyer, that's how

0:14:56.760 --> 0:14:59.320
<v Speaker 6>you should be. But then he started working for the

0:14:59.400 --> 0:15:01.720
<v Speaker 6>right during this time, and they made him kind of

0:15:01.720 --> 0:15:04.480
<v Speaker 6>the face of this seat belt law thing. And so

0:15:04.520 --> 0:15:06.600
<v Speaker 6>if you think about it, it seems, oh, it seems

0:15:06.680 --> 0:15:10.600
<v Speaker 6>like innocuous that this stupid white girl went to the

0:15:10.600 --> 0:15:12.200
<v Speaker 6>Supreme Court with this dumb ass case.

0:15:12.600 --> 0:15:18.000
<v Speaker 5>However, it does start to spark some.

0:15:19.720 --> 0:15:23.480
<v Speaker 6>Division based on race, and so I feel like that

0:15:23.680 --> 0:15:27.400
<v Speaker 6>is purposefully done in all of these these cases that

0:15:27.480 --> 0:15:29.720
<v Speaker 6>go to the Supreme Court. It sparks division based on

0:15:29.760 --> 0:15:34.760
<v Speaker 6>some type of human difference, whether it is reproductive.

0:15:34.200 --> 0:15:36.520
<v Speaker 5>Rights or gay rights or race.

0:15:36.720 --> 0:15:40.160
<v Speaker 6>It's something that people with their moral high ground can

0:15:40.160 --> 0:15:43.400
<v Speaker 6>get behind while they're not paying attention to what else

0:15:43.480 --> 0:15:45.760
<v Speaker 6>is going on or how those things actually affect their

0:15:45.800 --> 0:15:48.920
<v Speaker 6>personal life or how that's going to carry it. All

0:15:48.960 --> 0:15:51.000
<v Speaker 6>they're trying to do is carry the you know, carry

0:15:51.000 --> 0:15:55.320
<v Speaker 6>the play. That's what she said. She said, like racism

0:15:55.440 --> 0:15:57.520
<v Speaker 6>is the tool. Something is the play.

0:15:57.560 --> 0:15:59.520
<v Speaker 5>I can't remember what she said. I wish it was

0:15:59.560 --> 0:16:00.000
<v Speaker 5>real good.

0:16:00.480 --> 0:16:01.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, she's so smart.

0:16:01.480 --> 0:16:03.760
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, So all I know is is that I'm used

0:16:03.800 --> 0:16:06.680
<v Speaker 3>to this happening, Like I feel like there's always been

0:16:06.680 --> 0:16:08.840
<v Speaker 3>a point in my life where we've been fighting for something.

0:16:08.960 --> 0:16:12.440
<v Speaker 1>So I kind of look at it now when yawn, because.

0:16:12.160 --> 0:16:13.360
<v Speaker 2>I'm like, it's so predictable.

0:16:13.520 --> 0:16:15.400
<v Speaker 3>It is. It's like when you when you see all

0:16:15.400 --> 0:16:17.520
<v Speaker 3>the stuff happening and you was like, Okay, theyll remember

0:16:17.520 --> 0:16:20.720
<v Speaker 3>when they started rolling back affirmative action, saw that happening,

0:16:20.800 --> 0:16:23.640
<v Speaker 3>when they was rolling back DEI, when twenty twenty happened

0:16:23.680 --> 0:16:25.600
<v Speaker 3>and all the white guilt happened, and all of these

0:16:25.800 --> 0:16:29.200
<v Speaker 3>companies want to just throw money at black content and stuff.

0:16:29.240 --> 0:16:31.240
<v Speaker 3>I always remember saying to myself, how long y'all think

0:16:31.240 --> 0:16:33.360
<v Speaker 3>this is going to last? Right before they just say,

0:16:33.360 --> 0:16:36.960
<v Speaker 3>you know what, this is reverse racism, and now we're taking.

0:16:36.720 --> 0:16:41.120
<v Speaker 1>It all back. It's I don't have I'm gonna be honest,

0:16:41.120 --> 0:16:42.560
<v Speaker 1>but I don't have no hope for America.

0:16:43.760 --> 0:16:44.360
<v Speaker 4>How could you?

0:16:44.560 --> 0:16:45.840
<v Speaker 1>I don't have no hope for America.

0:16:45.920 --> 0:16:46.160
<v Speaker 4>Zero.

0:16:46.400 --> 0:16:49.920
<v Speaker 5>That's the That is the app No hope is gone.

0:16:50.360 --> 0:16:52.520
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, the hope is gone. We've been talking about it.

0:16:53.240 --> 0:16:56.440
<v Speaker 3>We can wag him out and hopefully the people who

0:16:56.440 --> 0:16:59.560
<v Speaker 3>are pretty much the new niggas realize that your vote

0:16:59.600 --> 0:17:01.560
<v Speaker 3>is the re and while we're all in this situation

0:17:01.640 --> 0:17:04.000
<v Speaker 3>and y'all realize they take they duped y'all.

0:17:03.760 --> 0:17:07.040
<v Speaker 2>Too so long to recover from the damage she's done. Yeah,

0:17:07.280 --> 0:17:09.920
<v Speaker 2>probably it's gonna take forever. We're not going to see

0:17:09.960 --> 0:17:11.360
<v Speaker 2>it in our lifetime.

0:17:10.920 --> 0:17:11.600
<v Speaker 1>Around the world.

0:17:11.680 --> 0:17:13.480
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, it's probably not in time at all.

0:17:13.960 --> 0:17:16.320
<v Speaker 2>One person came in here and dismantled so much it's

0:17:16.320 --> 0:17:17.960
<v Speaker 2>insane to watch.

0:17:18.119 --> 0:17:21.000
<v Speaker 4>He didn't he didn't dismantle. He just uncovered what was

0:17:21.600 --> 0:17:22.280
<v Speaker 4>laid dormant.

0:17:22.560 --> 0:17:25.479
<v Speaker 2>I mean, that is true, That is true. Who who

0:17:25.480 --> 0:17:26.640
<v Speaker 2>are these people in Congress too?

0:17:26.840 --> 0:17:26.919
<v Speaker 1>Like?

0:17:26.960 --> 0:17:28.919
<v Speaker 2>Are these people just sitting in there, like you know,

0:17:29.040 --> 0:17:31.240
<v Speaker 2>these old folks that just sitting there that probably were

0:17:31.480 --> 0:17:33.680
<v Speaker 2>descendants of owners that are just still there.

0:17:33.920 --> 0:17:35.119
<v Speaker 1>Aste. That's literally what it is.

0:17:35.240 --> 0:17:36.680
<v Speaker 4>Christmas?

0:17:36.760 --> 0:17:37.000
<v Speaker 2>Right?

0:17:37.640 --> 0:17:39.600
<v Speaker 5>Oh snap? What movie is there from.

0:17:41.080 --> 0:17:41.320
<v Speaker 4>Another?

0:17:41.440 --> 0:17:41.600
<v Speaker 1>Oh?

0:17:41.600 --> 0:17:44.200
<v Speaker 5>That's right, Christmas Adventures. That shit was so funny.

0:17:44.200 --> 0:17:45.119
<v Speaker 1>I'm gonna point some out to.

0:17:46.640 --> 0:17:50.480
<v Speaker 3>Think about all of the empires that that lasted two

0:17:50.600 --> 0:17:52.720
<v Speaker 3>hundred and fifty years. Two hundred and fifty years the

0:17:52.760 --> 0:17:54.800
<v Speaker 3>empires lasted, right, what year we in the matter?

0:17:54.840 --> 0:17:58.320
<v Speaker 5>To babe? I wonder if they're gonna have a real

0:17:58.359 --> 0:18:00.720
<v Speaker 5>big celebration on work this year.

0:18:01.160 --> 0:18:03.120
<v Speaker 1>Definitely years.

0:18:04.800 --> 0:18:06.400
<v Speaker 5>Gets everywhere.

0:18:06.480 --> 0:18:09.960
<v Speaker 1>He's man, they're gonna do all sorts of things, those.

0:18:09.880 --> 0:18:13.080
<v Speaker 5>Ram parts ramping. So I brought this up.

0:18:19.600 --> 0:18:24.240
<v Speaker 6>I brought this situation up because something that we learned

0:18:24.359 --> 0:18:27.159
<v Speaker 6>more in depth in high school is about civics and

0:18:27.160 --> 0:18:31.480
<v Speaker 6>how the government works, and also how different tools have

0:18:31.560 --> 0:18:35.680
<v Speaker 6>been used for political gain. And something that we learned

0:18:35.680 --> 0:18:39.159
<v Speaker 6>about early on was during Jim Crow, how the I

0:18:39.200 --> 0:18:42.640
<v Speaker 6>forget his name, dude from Mississippi youth racism. He said,

0:18:42.640 --> 0:18:46.119
<v Speaker 6>segregation to day, segregation, tomorrow, segregation.

0:18:45.760 --> 0:18:48.320
<v Speaker 1>Trying to remember, and I think you lost.

0:18:49.680 --> 0:18:53.560
<v Speaker 5>No, I was gonna say, it's a D it's a

0:18:53.640 --> 0:18:55.000
<v Speaker 5>D name. Hold on, let me look at that.

0:18:55.000 --> 0:18:58.840
<v Speaker 2>Real quicknis young influencer.

0:18:58.920 --> 0:19:08.240
<v Speaker 4>On probably David Duke George Wallace.

0:19:08.720 --> 0:19:09.040
<v Speaker 1>Speech.

0:19:09.400 --> 0:19:12.800
<v Speaker 6>That speech was actually written by an KKK leader.

0:19:13.320 --> 0:19:14.280
<v Speaker 1>Does that surprise you?

0:19:14.920 --> 0:19:17.720
<v Speaker 6>But so George Wallace, I do believe that he did

0:19:17.760 --> 0:19:22.520
<v Speaker 6>not win that race, but it's important. That was one

0:19:22.520 --> 0:19:25.600
<v Speaker 6>of the most important lessons that I learned in history class.

0:19:25.960 --> 0:19:30.240
<v Speaker 6>That's how I realized and my actual history teacher, mister Mileternal,

0:19:30.280 --> 0:19:33.119
<v Speaker 6>actually taught us how racism is used and how just

0:19:34.000 --> 0:19:35.639
<v Speaker 6>moral arguments are.

0:19:35.680 --> 0:19:41.000
<v Speaker 5>Used as ways to gain political power.

0:19:41.040 --> 0:19:42.840
<v Speaker 6>It's not that these people really care about it, but

0:19:42.880 --> 0:19:44.640
<v Speaker 6>they know that their constituents.

0:19:44.680 --> 0:19:46.000
<v Speaker 1>We watched that with religion.

0:19:46.080 --> 0:19:51.400
<v Speaker 3>Trump is religion countries on behalf of Christianity. Since when

0:19:51.520 --> 0:19:55.919
<v Speaker 3>is Trump become this big lavish Christian out of nowhere?

0:19:55.960 --> 0:19:57.480
<v Speaker 1>You know what I'm saying, like, and that's I.

0:19:57.520 --> 0:20:01.760
<v Speaker 6>Mean Christianity was used to justify genocide of Native Americans

0:20:01.800 --> 0:20:04.120
<v Speaker 6>when Europeans came here or whenever they win.

0:20:04.119 --> 0:20:09.120
<v Speaker 3>Anybody use a mortal high ground to justify their wrongdoings.

0:20:08.359 --> 0:20:11.120
<v Speaker 6>Exactly, and to gain political power and to be able

0:20:11.119 --> 0:20:16.879
<v Speaker 6>to colonize nations. So here we are preparing Jackson to

0:20:16.920 --> 0:20:19.000
<v Speaker 6>go into high school and preparing for a level of

0:20:19.000 --> 0:20:22.120
<v Speaker 6>critical thinking that's going to carry him into adulthood.

0:20:22.520 --> 0:20:25.440
<v Speaker 3>Yes, I'm glad that you that because that is literally

0:20:26.040 --> 0:20:29.119
<v Speaker 3>what I wanted to talk about today, all of those things.

0:20:29.200 --> 0:20:32.360
<v Speaker 1>First thing I want to talk about being a young

0:20:32.400 --> 0:20:35.879
<v Speaker 1>black man. My dad had this conversation with me getting

0:20:35.880 --> 0:20:36.840
<v Speaker 1>in the car with people.

0:20:37.960 --> 0:20:40.320
<v Speaker 3>Right, you have to know who you're getting in the

0:20:40.359 --> 0:20:42.399
<v Speaker 3>car with people, because now your friends are driving, You're

0:20:42.440 --> 0:20:43.520
<v Speaker 3>going into high school.

0:20:43.920 --> 0:20:46.400
<v Speaker 1>You got friends who are eighteen nineteen years old who

0:20:46.400 --> 0:20:47.480
<v Speaker 1>have their license and stuff.

0:20:47.560 --> 0:20:50.440
<v Speaker 2>Yep, carpooling, going to practice, coming home from practice.

0:20:50.560 --> 0:20:52.520
<v Speaker 1>One of my close friends who I grew up with

0:20:52.520 --> 0:20:53.240
<v Speaker 1>playing football.

0:20:53.280 --> 0:20:55.879
<v Speaker 3>I won't say his name, but was arrested because he

0:20:55.920 --> 0:20:58.679
<v Speaker 3>was coming back from upstate. One of his homeboys from

0:20:58.720 --> 0:21:01.679
<v Speaker 3>Flatbush picked him up to bring him back from school.

0:21:02.640 --> 0:21:04.399
<v Speaker 3>While they were coming back from school, what do you

0:21:04.400 --> 0:21:05.119
<v Speaker 3>think happened to them?

0:21:05.200 --> 0:21:08.920
<v Speaker 2>Got pulled over in the car something transporting, Wow.

0:21:08.960 --> 0:21:10.919
<v Speaker 1>Trafficking and trafficking.

0:21:10.960 --> 0:21:13.199
<v Speaker 3>So he went up north to pick his homeboy up

0:21:13.240 --> 0:21:16.439
<v Speaker 3>and was trafficking when they got pulled over. Everybody in

0:21:16.480 --> 0:21:19.600
<v Speaker 3>the car got stuck with that time and he ended

0:21:19.680 --> 0:21:20.600
<v Speaker 3>up doing three years.

0:21:20.840 --> 0:21:21.199
<v Speaker 4>Damn.

0:21:21.800 --> 0:21:23.879
<v Speaker 3>I got another homeboard that I played football with. He

0:21:23.960 --> 0:21:27.600
<v Speaker 3>ended up playing Mike Adams. He tells the story all

0:21:27.640 --> 0:21:30.240
<v Speaker 3>the time. Mike Adams was I believe, a senior in

0:21:30.320 --> 0:21:33.800
<v Speaker 3>high school and he was already committed to Delaware. Homeboys

0:21:33.800 --> 0:21:36.560
<v Speaker 3>came to pick him up, Mike Adams from Jersey. They

0:21:36.600 --> 0:21:38.320
<v Speaker 3>had guns in the car.

0:21:38.480 --> 0:21:39.320
<v Speaker 1>They get pulled over.

0:21:39.520 --> 0:21:41.480
<v Speaker 3>Only thing that saved Mike Adams was that he was

0:21:41.480 --> 0:21:44.800
<v Speaker 3>an athlete, and I believe the arresting officers of people

0:21:44.880 --> 0:21:46.840
<v Speaker 3>knew his story, knew his family, and he was able

0:21:46.880 --> 0:21:51.320
<v Speaker 3>to prove that it wasn't his guns. But sorry, but

0:21:51.440 --> 0:21:53.119
<v Speaker 3>let that be someone else.

0:21:53.560 --> 0:21:54.720
<v Speaker 1>They all going to jail.

0:21:54.840 --> 0:21:57.240
<v Speaker 6>They're all going to jail. I don't see that all

0:21:57.280 --> 0:22:00.600
<v Speaker 6>the time. On the first forty eight. Remember when I

0:22:00.640 --> 0:22:02.639
<v Speaker 6>was I'm maybe a sophomore or junior. I was in

0:22:02.680 --> 0:22:05.359
<v Speaker 6>this program, uh for high school girls, and there was

0:22:05.400 --> 0:22:09.240
<v Speaker 6>like a boys chapter as well. But one of our leaders,

0:22:09.480 --> 0:22:12.880
<v Speaker 6>her son had been murdered I think probably with people

0:22:13.040 --> 0:22:15.760
<v Speaker 6>that he didn't really know what they were into.

0:22:16.960 --> 0:22:22.639
<v Speaker 5>But she made us aware of the accessory law and

0:22:22.720 --> 0:22:23.080
<v Speaker 5>if you.

0:22:23.040 --> 0:22:27.280
<v Speaker 6>Are caught with somebody in the process of a crime,

0:22:27.520 --> 0:22:30.280
<v Speaker 6>you are an accesserator will do the same time.

0:22:31.040 --> 0:22:33.440
<v Speaker 5>And that scared me to goddamned death.

0:22:33.520 --> 0:22:35.600
<v Speaker 2>That's actually really good because if you know like that's

0:22:35.680 --> 0:22:37.520
<v Speaker 2>going to be, doesn't teach you to be mindful of

0:22:37.560 --> 0:22:37.960
<v Speaker 2>the company.

0:22:37.960 --> 0:22:39.280
<v Speaker 4>You can absolutely you.

0:22:39.200 --> 0:22:41.239
<v Speaker 6>Know, And I've always been a scared yet I'm not

0:22:41.359 --> 0:22:43.560
<v Speaker 6>getting in trouble anyway.

0:22:43.600 --> 0:22:46.240
<v Speaker 5>But I'm definitely not getting in trouble now, you know,

0:22:46.400 --> 0:22:46.720
<v Speaker 5>Like I.

0:22:46.720 --> 0:22:48.879
<v Speaker 2>Was okay high school being with the nerds. That was

0:22:48.960 --> 0:22:50.879
<v Speaker 2>me the first like two or three years of high school.

0:22:51.040 --> 0:22:52.960
<v Speaker 2>Even though when I was trying to figure myself out, if.

0:22:52.880 --> 0:22:56.400
<v Speaker 5>People start fighting, I go the other way. The other way.

0:22:56.400 --> 0:22:57.879
<v Speaker 5>I don't want to watch it. I don't want to

0:22:57.920 --> 0:22:58.919
<v Speaker 5>hear it. I don't want to see it.

0:22:58.960 --> 0:23:01.720
<v Speaker 6>My cousin got stabbed death watching or trying to break

0:23:01.800 --> 0:23:02.160
<v Speaker 6>up a fight.

0:23:02.200 --> 0:23:04.240
<v Speaker 5>I don't give a damn. Y'all beat each other's ass.

0:23:04.320 --> 0:23:05.600
<v Speaker 1>I'm leaving, yep.

0:23:05.560 --> 0:23:09.960
<v Speaker 3>Because conversations with your kids. I got another one for y'all.

0:23:11.160 --> 0:23:12.120
<v Speaker 3>Child pornography.

0:23:12.640 --> 0:23:13.040
<v Speaker 5>Mm hmm.

0:23:13.320 --> 0:23:17.160
<v Speaker 1>You're fifteen years old, Surety sends you some pictures.

0:23:17.480 --> 0:23:20.240
<v Speaker 3>You put it in a group chat. The group chat

0:23:20.280 --> 0:23:23.600
<v Speaker 3>starts sending those pictures out. They start investigating. They find

0:23:23.600 --> 0:23:25.720
<v Speaker 3>a group chat. You don't say nothing in the group chat,

0:23:25.720 --> 0:23:27.560
<v Speaker 3>but your name is in the group chat. You go

0:23:27.600 --> 0:23:29.600
<v Speaker 3>to jail for child pornography. That is a law.

0:23:29.760 --> 0:23:31.480
<v Speaker 6>I had a friend whose brother got in trouble for

0:23:31.520 --> 0:23:34.280
<v Speaker 6>that yea when he was a senior somebody. And it

0:23:34.359 --> 0:23:35.960
<v Speaker 6>wasn't even a group chat. It was just a girl

0:23:36.040 --> 0:23:41.480
<v Speaker 6>sent him nudes. He's saying her parents found it and

0:23:41.520 --> 0:23:46.160
<v Speaker 6>they were like, you know, black boy, white girls out.

0:23:46.280 --> 0:23:47.919
<v Speaker 2>It's just the fact that she sent them to history.

0:23:48.000 --> 0:23:50.040
<v Speaker 4>He had them on his phones where he got in trouble.

0:23:50.119 --> 0:23:50.840
<v Speaker 5>He got in trouble.

0:23:51.040 --> 0:23:53.200
<v Speaker 4>That's crazy. She gets in no trouble.

0:23:53.680 --> 0:23:55.720
<v Speaker 6>She gets in no trouble because she's under age and

0:23:55.760 --> 0:23:58.719
<v Speaker 6>I think he might have been at least almost eighteen

0:23:58.760 --> 0:23:59.240
<v Speaker 6>at the time.

0:23:59.440 --> 0:24:01.640
<v Speaker 5>He was probably a senior. She's sophomore or something like that.

0:24:02.119 --> 0:24:06.119
<v Speaker 6>There's a kid in Cincinnati right now who is a

0:24:06.160 --> 0:24:10.040
<v Speaker 6>girl's family's pressing criminal charges because he created nudes of

0:24:10.359 --> 0:24:13.960
<v Speaker 6>one of his classmates with using AI and sent them

0:24:13.960 --> 0:24:17.399
<v Speaker 6>out to like that before, but the school let him

0:24:17.440 --> 0:24:18.400
<v Speaker 6>come back to class.

0:24:19.800 --> 0:24:20.359
<v Speaker 5>It's crazy.

0:24:20.480 --> 0:24:22.240
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, the wild Bie West. I feel like as parents

0:24:22.280 --> 0:24:24.600
<v Speaker 2>now we're just contending with so many things that we

0:24:24.640 --> 0:24:27.680
<v Speaker 2>did not have to contend with. Like my mom looked

0:24:27.680 --> 0:24:29.280
<v Speaker 2>at me the other day and she's like, I really

0:24:30.080 --> 0:24:33.320
<v Speaker 2>feel feel for you guys, because you not raising children

0:24:33.400 --> 0:24:35.639
<v Speaker 2>the way I raised you. The worst we were concerned

0:24:35.680 --> 0:24:37.840
<v Speaker 2>about was like, you know, what would happen if you're

0:24:37.880 --> 0:24:41.240
<v Speaker 2>taking public transportation or like you know. But now it's

0:24:41.320 --> 0:24:44.720
<v Speaker 2>like the social space, the digital space rather is where

0:24:45.280 --> 0:24:48.159
<v Speaker 2>we're like, man, there's so much to contend with. How

0:24:48.200 --> 0:24:48.960
<v Speaker 2>do you control it?

0:24:49.119 --> 0:24:49.679
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, it's not.

0:24:50.080 --> 0:24:50.320
<v Speaker 1>Well.

0:24:50.560 --> 0:24:53.439
<v Speaker 3>The one thing I do the same thing with my

0:24:53.480 --> 0:24:55.680
<v Speaker 3>boys that I did with my young men and women

0:24:55.680 --> 0:24:59.280
<v Speaker 3>that I had in prototype. We do social media checks,

0:25:00.040 --> 0:25:02.440
<v Speaker 3>need them passwords, and I need to see that phone

0:25:02.480 --> 0:25:03.000
<v Speaker 3>on demand.

0:25:03.400 --> 0:25:05.520
<v Speaker 1>Like when I asked you to see the phone, I'm

0:25:05.520 --> 0:25:06.000
<v Speaker 1>not trying to hear.

0:25:06.040 --> 0:25:08.160
<v Speaker 3>Oh Dad, I'm gonna go upstairs and get it. No no, no, no, no,

0:25:08.760 --> 0:25:11.280
<v Speaker 3>pass me that phone. Let me look at it right now, unprompted,

0:25:11.320 --> 0:25:13.760
<v Speaker 3>because I want to see You would be surprised. And

0:25:13.800 --> 0:25:16.520
<v Speaker 3>I'm saying this to all parents who are listening. All parents,

0:25:16.560 --> 0:25:20.280
<v Speaker 3>listen to me. Everything you think you know about your child,

0:25:20.600 --> 0:25:22.199
<v Speaker 3>boy or girl.

0:25:22.200 --> 0:25:22.720
<v Speaker 1>You don't know.

0:25:24.720 --> 0:25:29.480
<v Speaker 3>I had moms proclaimed to me that their children do

0:25:29.600 --> 0:25:32.800
<v Speaker 3>not have social media, didn't even know they kid had

0:25:32.800 --> 0:25:36.600
<v Speaker 3>a phone. These kids are taking their their friends' phones

0:25:36.640 --> 0:25:40.160
<v Speaker 3>that are not active, using the Wi Fi, keeping it

0:25:40.320 --> 0:25:42.280
<v Speaker 3>because it doesn't have to be attached to anything, and

0:25:42.320 --> 0:25:44.439
<v Speaker 3>having their own apps on phones that their.

0:25:44.320 --> 0:25:49.399
<v Speaker 1>Parents don't even know. And theyre bringing berners home. The

0:25:49.480 --> 0:25:53.359
<v Speaker 1>burners stay at the school. That's how they never get caught.

0:25:53.560 --> 0:25:56.119
<v Speaker 1>This is how I found out about is another story.

0:25:56.119 --> 0:25:57.640
<v Speaker 1>When you're mentoring, you see it all.

0:25:57.720 --> 0:25:59.399
<v Speaker 2>I've seen high schoolers, We've seen it all.

0:25:59.560 --> 0:26:03.280
<v Speaker 3>I seen kids get I saw a very tragic story.

0:26:03.720 --> 0:26:06.480
<v Speaker 1>A young lady had sex with two young men.

0:26:06.720 --> 0:26:10.480
<v Speaker 3>They decided to share some of the pictures and video

0:26:10.800 --> 0:26:13.080
<v Speaker 3>and that young lady walked off a train at the

0:26:13.200 --> 0:26:13.879
<v Speaker 3>end of school.

0:26:14.000 --> 0:26:15.719
<v Speaker 1>Oh my god, at the end of school.

0:26:15.800 --> 0:26:19.399
<v Speaker 3>These two athletes almost missed out on playing in their

0:26:19.480 --> 0:26:21.560
<v Speaker 3>senior I think they did miss out playing in their

0:26:21.600 --> 0:26:23.719
<v Speaker 3>senior year because they were dealing with charges and stuff.

0:26:24.160 --> 0:26:28.400
<v Speaker 1>But this was back in two thousand and twelve.

0:26:28.080 --> 0:26:30.959
<v Speaker 3>I believe, and social media was just starting to buzz

0:26:31.960 --> 0:26:33.640
<v Speaker 3>and people didn't know what to do then.

0:26:34.040 --> 0:26:35.080
<v Speaker 1>So as a parent.

0:26:34.880 --> 0:26:37.960
<v Speaker 3>Now, because I saw all of those things, I'm talking

0:26:38.000 --> 0:26:43.120
<v Speaker 3>to Jack's about drugs alcohol. I'm not back in the day.

0:26:43.160 --> 0:26:45.000
<v Speaker 3>Don't do no drugs, don't do no alcohol. I know

0:26:45.080 --> 0:26:47.240
<v Speaker 3>that this around him. He's in eighth grade now when

0:26:47.240 --> 0:26:49.479
<v Speaker 3>them eighth grade is be vapor When I pull up

0:26:49.520 --> 0:26:51.320
<v Speaker 3>to the school to go to some of these things,

0:26:51.320 --> 0:26:52.840
<v Speaker 3>these eighth grade is outside smoking.

0:26:53.080 --> 0:26:53.359
<v Speaker 6>Yeah.

0:26:53.440 --> 0:26:55.320
<v Speaker 5>I was definitely smoking weed in eighth grade.

0:26:55.440 --> 0:26:57.639
<v Speaker 1>So I'm no longer going to be the whole like

0:26:58.440 --> 0:27:01.480
<v Speaker 1>drugs is bad. If I now like, what are you interested?

0:27:02.160 --> 0:27:03.959
<v Speaker 1>Do you know what drugs are? Do you know what

0:27:04.000 --> 0:27:04.840
<v Speaker 1>alcohol is?

0:27:05.400 --> 0:27:08.400
<v Speaker 3>Have you ever tasted alcohol? Do you because I want

0:27:08.440 --> 0:27:10.800
<v Speaker 3>them to My parents did that with me. My uncle

0:27:10.880 --> 0:27:14.160
<v Speaker 3>Kevin was just like you ever had a drink before

0:27:14.800 --> 0:27:17.200
<v Speaker 3>and I was like nah. He was like, you're looking

0:27:17.200 --> 0:27:20.880
<v Speaker 3>at that Hennessy and I was just like I was fifteen,

0:27:21.040 --> 0:27:21.919
<v Speaker 3>give me no taste.

0:27:21.960 --> 0:27:22.600
<v Speaker 1>And I was like yo.

0:27:23.200 --> 0:27:24.520
<v Speaker 3>I was like, let me get it in me taste

0:27:24.840 --> 0:27:26.080
<v Speaker 3>and he was like, if you taste it, you got

0:27:26.119 --> 0:27:26.960
<v Speaker 3>to drink the whole cup.

0:27:27.280 --> 0:27:27.879
<v Speaker 4>Oh damn.

0:27:28.000 --> 0:27:31.600
<v Speaker 1>So me being an idiot and not knowing you know

0:27:31.640 --> 0:27:32.200
<v Speaker 1>what I'm saying.

0:27:32.600 --> 0:27:35.440
<v Speaker 3>I had this Tennessee no ice because I'm thinking I'm

0:27:35.520 --> 0:27:39.880
<v Speaker 3>tough and I'm sipping it. Boy in about an hour

0:27:39.920 --> 0:27:43.800
<v Speaker 3>and a half, sweating, didn't want to know, like just sweating,

0:27:43.880 --> 0:27:45.000
<v Speaker 3>looking around like yo, what.

0:27:45.040 --> 0:27:46.760
<v Speaker 2>Like he was a cop. He was just like, let

0:27:46.800 --> 0:27:47.480
<v Speaker 2>me put you through this.

0:27:47.760 --> 0:27:49.840
<v Speaker 1>My uncle Kevin did not play with that stuff with

0:27:49.920 --> 0:27:50.720
<v Speaker 1>me and my brothers.

0:27:51.880 --> 0:27:54.159
<v Speaker 3>He was the most scared straight and I love him

0:27:54.200 --> 0:27:56.320
<v Speaker 3>for that, the most scared straight type of person.

0:27:56.400 --> 0:27:58.679
<v Speaker 1>Oh you want to do this, Let's go do this.

0:27:58.760 --> 0:28:01.080
<v Speaker 3>You want to see what with gangs and really happens

0:28:01.080 --> 0:28:03.199
<v Speaker 3>with this? Okay, let's go look at that. And it

0:28:03.240 --> 0:28:05.159
<v Speaker 3>wasn't like the scared straight. It just gave me the

0:28:05.200 --> 0:28:06.399
<v Speaker 3>warwellthrow to understand it.

0:28:06.480 --> 0:28:07.880
<v Speaker 1>That's not a role I want to go down.

0:28:07.920 --> 0:28:10.000
<v Speaker 2>It also takes the mistique away from it because so

0:28:10.000 --> 0:28:12.840
<v Speaker 2>many things in high school are glorified by your little

0:28:12.840 --> 0:28:16.120
<v Speaker 2>friends who don't know any better. So if you're exposing

0:28:16.160 --> 0:28:18.280
<v Speaker 2>your children to this and having the conversation it doesn't

0:28:18.320 --> 0:28:21.320
<v Speaker 2>seem like something that's like out of touch. Make it

0:28:21.359 --> 0:28:24.280
<v Speaker 2>accessible for them in an environment that's controlled while the

0:28:24.320 --> 0:28:27.560
<v Speaker 2>stakes are low facts versus waiting till they get to

0:28:27.880 --> 0:28:29.800
<v Speaker 2>a high school or college or become an adult to

0:28:29.920 --> 0:28:32.359
<v Speaker 2>get into trouble that when the stakes are really high

0:28:32.400 --> 0:28:34.359
<v Speaker 2>and they can lose so much.

0:28:34.680 --> 0:28:37.320
<v Speaker 3>You know, we talk to our boys and we're talking

0:28:37.320 --> 0:28:39.520
<v Speaker 3>about high school Becausejackson's going to high school, but we

0:28:39.520 --> 0:28:41.800
<v Speaker 3>talk to our boys about this stuff from young We

0:28:41.840 --> 0:28:43.800
<v Speaker 3>talked to Kyro and Cash just the other day about

0:28:43.800 --> 0:28:47.040
<v Speaker 3>consent nine to eight years old. I'm like, you see me,

0:28:47.080 --> 0:28:49.240
<v Speaker 3>I grab on your mother, right, you see, I put

0:28:49.360 --> 0:28:51.240
<v Speaker 3>on my lap. You know that we were friends first,

0:28:52.200 --> 0:28:55.000
<v Speaker 3>and we had these conversations in front of them, like,

0:28:55.400 --> 0:28:57.479
<v Speaker 3>you know, I asked her, you know, if it's okay.

0:28:57.800 --> 0:29:00.480
<v Speaker 3>You got to remember when Jackson went over to Rob

0:29:01.320 --> 0:29:05.760
<v Speaker 3>and remember Rob's daughter. I forgot Rob's daughters, Oh, Aubrey.

0:29:05.760 --> 0:29:08.160
<v Speaker 3>They were eleven at the time, and no ten. They

0:29:08.200 --> 0:29:11.080
<v Speaker 3>were ten because we're still living in LA and Rob

0:29:11.120 --> 0:29:12.960
<v Speaker 3>called me, like, man, we got to talk, and.

0:29:12.960 --> 0:29:13.520
<v Speaker 1>I was like, what's up.

0:29:13.520 --> 0:29:16.400
<v Speaker 3>He was just like, Jackson put his arm around Aubrey

0:29:17.320 --> 0:29:18.800
<v Speaker 3>and then he was like, what happened?

0:29:19.240 --> 0:29:20.680
<v Speaker 1>Now? I was like, I was like, so what happened?

0:29:20.680 --> 0:29:21.320
<v Speaker 1>He was just like nothing.

0:29:21.360 --> 0:29:23.360
<v Speaker 3>I was watching him in the room and then he

0:29:23.400 --> 0:29:25.120
<v Speaker 3>had his arm around her, and then after a while

0:29:25.160 --> 0:29:26.160
<v Speaker 3>he didn't.

0:29:26.400 --> 0:29:27.520
<v Speaker 1>So I was all right, so I'm gonna talk to

0:29:27.600 --> 0:29:29.000
<v Speaker 1>Jackson see what it was about. He's like, I'm just

0:29:29.040 --> 0:29:30.960
<v Speaker 1>letting you know that. You know, it seems like Jackson's

0:29:31.040 --> 0:29:33.840
<v Speaker 1>interested in girls because he's a man too.

0:29:33.880 --> 0:29:35.800
<v Speaker 3>He was like, yo, I have this conversation. So I said, Jackson,

0:29:35.840 --> 0:29:37.720
<v Speaker 3>what happened? He was like, no, I just saw you

0:29:37.760 --> 0:29:41.280
<v Speaker 3>do it because mom. You do it with mom. And

0:29:41.320 --> 0:29:42.960
<v Speaker 3>I said, well, did you ask? He said yeah, I asked,

0:29:43.000 --> 0:29:43.240
<v Speaker 3>and she.

0:29:43.160 --> 0:29:45.200
<v Speaker 1>Said okay, and then after a while she was like

0:29:45.240 --> 0:29:46.080
<v Speaker 1>she's not okay no more.

0:29:46.120 --> 0:29:48.400
<v Speaker 3>So I just moved it. So I said, well, that's

0:29:48.560 --> 0:29:51.840
<v Speaker 3>that's consent. You're practicing learning how to interact with a

0:29:51.880 --> 0:29:54.360
<v Speaker 3>young lady. And then remember he walked her home. Remember

0:29:54.360 --> 0:29:56.840
<v Speaker 3>he walked her home and made sure she got into

0:29:56.880 --> 0:29:58.840
<v Speaker 3>the door and stuff, and I just want to make

0:29:58.840 --> 0:30:01.360
<v Speaker 3>sure that my boys are awa that they also have

0:30:01.640 --> 0:30:03.480
<v Speaker 3>rights to protect themselves exactly.

0:30:03.600 --> 0:30:06.000
<v Speaker 6>Yes, Yeah, I was gonna say, there's a big thing

0:30:06.080 --> 0:30:09.360
<v Speaker 6>too with boys and their hormones, and you know, just

0:30:09.400 --> 0:30:14.240
<v Speaker 6>like having so much energy and testosterone and sexuality becomes

0:30:14.280 --> 0:30:16.840
<v Speaker 6>a really big thing. And I think the biggest thing

0:30:16.880 --> 0:30:20.360
<v Speaker 6>with girls and boys is that it's private, you know

0:30:20.360 --> 0:30:22.840
<v Speaker 6>what I'm saying, Like, and that is something that should

0:30:22.880 --> 0:30:29.040
<v Speaker 6>be taught early because of the phones. Back in the day,

0:30:29.720 --> 0:30:31.320
<v Speaker 6>when I was in sixth grade, it used to be

0:30:31.360 --> 0:30:33.320
<v Speaker 6>like a boy just showed you his dick on the

0:30:33.360 --> 0:30:35.040
<v Speaker 6>bus and You're like, why would you do that?

0:30:35.840 --> 0:30:36.680
<v Speaker 1>You can't prove it.

0:30:36.760 --> 0:30:38.000
<v Speaker 2>You can't prove it nobody.

0:30:39.120 --> 0:30:43.000
<v Speaker 6>Now the dig pics have gotten out of control, even

0:30:43.040 --> 0:30:45.400
<v Speaker 6>with like adults. You know what I'm saying, This is

0:30:45.480 --> 0:30:49.040
<v Speaker 6>private for you, Like it's okay, you know you your

0:30:49.040 --> 0:30:51.960
<v Speaker 6>body is for your exploration. You should find out what's

0:30:52.040 --> 0:30:54.080
<v Speaker 6>good and what's not. But it's private for you. I

0:30:54.080 --> 0:30:56.760
<v Speaker 6>don't want to see nobody else needs to see it.

0:30:57.320 --> 0:30:59.120
<v Speaker 1>One of my kids got caught in the dig pic.

0:30:59.520 --> 0:31:01.040
<v Speaker 1>The reason why I was funny because we was like

0:31:01.320 --> 0:31:09.480
<v Speaker 1>that ain't even your dick, he said he was. She said,

0:31:09.680 --> 0:31:12.360
<v Speaker 1>she just said, YO, send me a dick pic. So

0:31:12.400 --> 0:31:15.280
<v Speaker 1>he just sent a dick pic he said. I wasn't

0:31:15.280 --> 0:31:16.640
<v Speaker 1>going to say was smart.

0:31:16.800 --> 0:31:19.080
<v Speaker 5>I was like, bro, give him.

0:31:20.480 --> 0:31:26.000
<v Speaker 2>And you like what happened. That just goes to show

0:31:26.040 --> 0:31:28.840
<v Speaker 2>how innocent they are, and they're not even equipped to

0:31:28.920 --> 0:31:31.520
<v Speaker 2>be engaging in that kind of activity because y'all doing

0:31:31.600 --> 0:31:34.640
<v Speaker 2>dumb ship in the process saying. One thing I'm happy

0:31:34.640 --> 0:31:36.760
<v Speaker 2>about is Jackson's not a kid attached to his device

0:31:37.360 --> 0:31:39.440
<v Speaker 2>like there's Sometimes we'll go to call him and it

0:31:39.480 --> 0:31:40.920
<v Speaker 2>may just be he's in the house and we're like

0:31:41.000 --> 0:31:42.880
<v Speaker 2>somewhere upstairs and he's downstairs and he's just like, oh,

0:31:42.880 --> 0:31:44.760
<v Speaker 2>I didn't have my phone with me. And in the moment,

0:31:44.760 --> 0:31:46.360
<v Speaker 2>you want to be like, bro, like where's your phone?

0:31:46.400 --> 0:31:48.440
<v Speaker 2>And then I'm like, you know what devil said. Sometimes

0:31:48.480 --> 0:31:50.280
<v Speaker 2>he's a practice he don't answer. It's kind of good

0:31:50.280 --> 0:31:54.000
<v Speaker 2>that he's not very dependent on his phone. He really isn't,

0:31:54.320 --> 0:31:55.600
<v Speaker 2>and I hope he kind of stays that way.

0:31:55.720 --> 0:31:57.160
<v Speaker 1>As parents, we got to be careful though.

0:31:57.200 --> 0:31:59.600
<v Speaker 3>I have two kids who smoke something bad in college

0:31:59.600 --> 0:32:01.160
<v Speaker 3>and the same afterwards.

0:32:01.200 --> 0:32:03.800
<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, So the whole even smoking weed thing.

0:32:04.480 --> 0:32:07.080
<v Speaker 3>I talked to Jackson about, Yo, if you are interested,

0:32:07.120 --> 0:32:09.320
<v Speaker 3>because weed is legal and I think forty eight of

0:32:09.400 --> 0:32:12.080
<v Speaker 3>the fifty states, so a lot of his friends who

0:32:12.080 --> 0:32:14.680
<v Speaker 3>are older, they go out and they purchase weed, and

0:32:14.720 --> 0:32:18.479
<v Speaker 3>I'm like, yo, listen, if you're interested in smoking, please

0:32:18.560 --> 0:32:21.320
<v Speaker 3>come to me first and talk to me about what

0:32:21.360 --> 0:32:23.720
<v Speaker 3>it is you think you might want to try. Don't

0:32:23.720 --> 0:32:26.040
<v Speaker 3>go out there and ask your friends because you're afraid

0:32:26.320 --> 0:32:28.680
<v Speaker 3>that your dad might be upset because the last thing

0:32:28.680 --> 0:32:30.160
<v Speaker 3>I wanted you to go out there and get some

0:32:30.200 --> 0:32:31.280
<v Speaker 3>bad synthetic weed.

0:32:31.720 --> 0:32:32.400
<v Speaker 1>And now I'm.

0:32:32.280 --> 0:32:35.400
<v Speaker 3>Wondering what happened to myself, you know, because I have

0:32:35.440 --> 0:32:38.480
<v Speaker 3>two kids from Prototype who I speak to their parents,

0:32:38.520 --> 0:32:40.720
<v Speaker 3>and it was like he smoked something that was never

0:32:40.760 --> 0:32:43.720
<v Speaker 3>the same after that one loss of full scholarship, Yeah,

0:32:43.720 --> 0:32:44.240
<v Speaker 3>because of it.

0:32:44.360 --> 0:32:47.080
<v Speaker 6>The biggest part here then once my high school is dead.

0:32:47.240 --> 0:32:51.680
<v Speaker 6>He died of a heroin overdose a few years back,

0:32:52.160 --> 0:32:54.160
<v Speaker 6>and he was like in and out of rehabs for

0:32:54.200 --> 0:32:56.600
<v Speaker 6>a long time, and it was like, of course he

0:32:56.680 --> 0:32:59.880
<v Speaker 6>had other issues other than smoking weed, but you know,

0:33:01.080 --> 0:33:03.480
<v Speaker 6>it does play into it. If you find a way

0:33:03.480 --> 0:33:07.160
<v Speaker 6>to cope that is drugs, or alcohol or something outside

0:33:07.120 --> 0:33:11.480
<v Speaker 6>of your Yeah, at least, yeah, you're gonna keep doing

0:33:11.520 --> 0:33:14.160
<v Speaker 6>that and that a certain point weed is not gonna

0:33:14.160 --> 0:33:17.240
<v Speaker 6>be enough, you know so, right, and we just ill

0:33:17.360 --> 0:33:22.239
<v Speaker 6>not legal in Georgia, so they we here And I

0:33:22.280 --> 0:33:26.080
<v Speaker 6>did hear a report about gummies that are sold in

0:33:26.160 --> 0:33:28.800
<v Speaker 6>places where weed is not legal, a lot of them

0:33:28.960 --> 0:33:31.080
<v Speaker 6>being laced with fentanyl.

0:33:30.720 --> 0:33:33.600
<v Speaker 1>Yes, like to get people addicted.

0:33:34.280 --> 0:33:36.560
<v Speaker 3>That's why it's important to have these conversations with your

0:33:36.600 --> 0:33:39.720
<v Speaker 3>kids going into high school because as they legalize these things,

0:33:39.760 --> 0:33:41.800
<v Speaker 3>and the only reason they're legalizing these things is to

0:33:41.880 --> 0:33:43.920
<v Speaker 3>tax them so that they can make money, because they

0:33:44.000 --> 0:33:45.920
<v Speaker 3>knew before they weren't making any money.

0:33:45.640 --> 0:33:48.560
<v Speaker 2>Off the industry. It's the same thing industry.

0:33:48.120 --> 0:33:49.840
<v Speaker 1>As alcohol was and prohibition.

0:33:49.960 --> 0:33:52.200
<v Speaker 3>It's like at one point alcohol was the big bad

0:33:52.240 --> 0:33:54.800
<v Speaker 3>wolf until they legalize it so that they can tax

0:33:54.840 --> 0:33:56.960
<v Speaker 3>people on it. But then we watch out like alcohol

0:33:57.000 --> 0:33:59.560
<v Speaker 3>has been killing people left and right. So it's not

0:33:59.680 --> 0:34:01.479
<v Speaker 3>enough to just trusted the government are going to put

0:34:01.520 --> 0:34:03.720
<v Speaker 3>parameters on things that are not good for kids.

0:34:03.760 --> 0:34:08.760
<v Speaker 1>Because when I watch these kids even smoking cigarettes, because.

0:34:10.840 --> 0:34:14.520
<v Speaker 3>You can get cigarettes at eighteen twenty one, now twenty one,

0:34:14.520 --> 0:34:17.439
<v Speaker 3>Now that's how old Diane, I need so these kids

0:34:17.440 --> 0:34:19.920
<v Speaker 3>be smoking cigarettes at the school.

0:34:20.280 --> 0:34:21.760
<v Speaker 1>Like I go to the high.

0:34:21.640 --> 0:34:24.879
<v Speaker 3>School and I'm like, first of its twenty twenty six

0:34:24.960 --> 0:34:26.600
<v Speaker 3>kids smoking cigarette.

0:34:27.200 --> 0:34:28.399
<v Speaker 1>Kids though, because they.

0:34:28.320 --> 0:34:30.279
<v Speaker 3>Want to look older, they want to look cool, they

0:34:30.360 --> 0:34:31.560
<v Speaker 3>want to feel independent.

0:34:31.640 --> 0:34:34.080
<v Speaker 4>That's a crazy way to look cool. Bro, Bro, that's

0:34:34.160 --> 0:34:36.080
<v Speaker 4>about to feel you must to say something crazy. The

0:34:36.120 --> 0:34:37.680
<v Speaker 4>sad part is that's better than vapor.

0:34:38.120 --> 0:34:39.279
<v Speaker 1>Cigarettes are better than vapor.

0:34:39.400 --> 0:34:44.080
<v Speaker 5>Oh yeah, it's very addicting. Nicotine is extremely addicted.

0:34:44.160 --> 0:34:47.600
<v Speaker 2>Exactly, you think whokah will ever go? Or who can

0:34:47.640 --> 0:34:48.320
<v Speaker 2>here to stay?

0:34:48.560 --> 0:34:51.960
<v Speaker 6>Whokah's here to stay? Nobody says anything bad about who could.

0:34:51.800 --> 0:34:53.200
<v Speaker 4>Ever the problem?

0:34:53.400 --> 0:34:57.600
<v Speaker 1>They knew they would. Smoking hookahs horrible for you.

0:34:57.760 --> 0:35:00.360
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I started. We used to do it, you know,

0:35:01.160 --> 0:35:03.440
<v Speaker 2>occasionally socially, but I kind of just said, you know,

0:35:03.560 --> 0:35:04.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm off that.

0:35:04.920 --> 0:35:05.160
<v Speaker 1>See.

0:35:05.200 --> 0:35:08.000
<v Speaker 3>I knew hohoku was bad when I went to the Bronx,

0:35:08.239 --> 0:35:09.759
<v Speaker 3>and that's a big thing. In the Bronx, they smoke

0:35:09.760 --> 0:35:11.160
<v Speaker 3>a like hook and I seen his chick. She was

0:35:11.160 --> 0:35:11.680
<v Speaker 3>like twenty two.

0:35:11.719 --> 0:35:13.320
<v Speaker 1>She sounded like a grandma.

0:35:13.680 --> 0:35:15.680
<v Speaker 3>She was like, I've been smoking because I was fifteen.

0:35:15.719 --> 0:35:25.719
<v Speaker 3>I was like, yeah, but nah, this.

0:35:27.160 --> 0:35:28.640
<v Speaker 1>I do be worried about my kids.

0:35:28.680 --> 0:35:31.120
<v Speaker 3>Man, and I'm not waiting unto high school to have

0:35:31.160 --> 0:35:32.399
<v Speaker 3>these conversations with them.

0:35:32.480 --> 0:35:35.920
<v Speaker 1>And I'm also not I want to clear it up.

0:35:36.600 --> 0:35:39.520
<v Speaker 3>I'm not promoting my kid smoking or drinking alcohol because

0:35:39.520 --> 0:35:42.040
<v Speaker 3>you know, you say certain clips and oh defou said

0:35:42.040 --> 0:35:44.000
<v Speaker 3>this something. No, I'm not promoting that. If you ask

0:35:44.080 --> 0:35:46.759
<v Speaker 3>my sons now when dad started smoking, they'll tell you.

0:35:46.760 --> 0:35:49.120
<v Speaker 3>My dad ain't start smoking until you retired from the NFL.

0:35:49.840 --> 0:35:52.040
<v Speaker 3>My dad only smoked when he won. He smoked cigars.

0:35:52.040 --> 0:35:52.959
<v Speaker 3>My dad didn't drink.

0:35:53.200 --> 0:35:55.719
<v Speaker 1>I grew up all of college ever since you know me,

0:35:55.760 --> 0:35:56.360
<v Speaker 1>I was never.

0:35:56.200 --> 0:35:58.400
<v Speaker 3>Biggingto smoking and drinking, and it was because I was

0:35:58.440 --> 0:36:01.360
<v Speaker 3>focused on what I was doing. But also, my dad

0:36:01.360 --> 0:36:03.879
<v Speaker 3>never made drinking taboo and my uncle's never made any

0:36:03.920 --> 0:36:07.719
<v Speaker 3>of that stuff taboo, so I never was like it.

0:36:08.080 --> 0:36:09.120
<v Speaker 1>They never hid it from me.

0:36:09.200 --> 0:36:11.120
<v Speaker 3>When it was around and people were doing it, they

0:36:11.160 --> 0:36:12.759
<v Speaker 3>were like, yeah, that's that, but we don't do that.

0:36:13.280 --> 0:36:14.839
<v Speaker 1>So for me, it was like, oh, if I see

0:36:14.840 --> 0:36:16.239
<v Speaker 1>the people that I look up to not.

0:36:16.280 --> 0:36:18.960
<v Speaker 3>Doing it and it's around, exactly, I didn't feel no

0:36:19.040 --> 0:36:21.560
<v Speaker 3>way about telling people my age I didn't do it,

0:36:21.640 --> 0:36:22.920
<v Speaker 3>and they never pressed me for it.

0:36:22.920 --> 0:36:24.200
<v Speaker 1>They was like, if I don't smoke.

0:36:24.000 --> 0:36:26.680
<v Speaker 2>He don't drink, your athlete, so and you can be

0:36:26.719 --> 0:36:28.680
<v Speaker 2>cool doing that. You know, a lot of times kids

0:36:28.760 --> 0:36:30.680
<v Speaker 2>just do it because they want affirmation from the people

0:36:30.719 --> 0:36:33.520
<v Speaker 2>around them. But if no one's making it cool, it's

0:36:33.600 --> 0:36:34.759
<v Speaker 2>just like, all right, no big deal.

0:36:35.760 --> 0:36:38.239
<v Speaker 1>I do want to talk about preparing your kids to

0:36:38.360 --> 0:36:42.520
<v Speaker 1>be independent thinkers going into high school and not seeking

0:36:43.040 --> 0:36:46.520
<v Speaker 1>admiration and approval from their peers, because I knew if

0:36:46.600 --> 0:36:49.720
<v Speaker 1>that was something someone would have told me in middle school,

0:36:49.960 --> 0:36:52.200
<v Speaker 1>I wouldn't have struggled my first two years of high school.

0:36:52.719 --> 0:36:54.680
<v Speaker 1>I struggled my first two years of high school only

0:36:54.680 --> 0:36:58.600
<v Speaker 1>because I was very different and I didn't understand that

0:36:58.719 --> 0:37:00.320
<v Speaker 1>you don't have to be a part of all of

0:37:00.360 --> 0:37:01.080
<v Speaker 1>the clicks.

0:37:01.480 --> 0:37:03.920
<v Speaker 3>So I was doing stuff early, like I cut class

0:37:04.000 --> 0:37:05.920
<v Speaker 3>when I first started, I was I was part of

0:37:05.920 --> 0:37:06.640
<v Speaker 3>this dance group.

0:37:06.680 --> 0:37:07.640
<v Speaker 1>I tried to join the gang.

0:37:08.080 --> 0:37:10.480
<v Speaker 3>Told you how to join the gang. You know, it's

0:37:10.520 --> 0:37:12.120
<v Speaker 3>math funny. It's math funny.

0:37:12.320 --> 0:37:14.560
<v Speaker 2>It's also like a culture shock. For example, you go

0:37:14.600 --> 0:37:17.520
<v Speaker 2>from a smaller you know, you know, eighth grade or whatever.

0:37:17.520 --> 0:37:19.080
<v Speaker 2>Your junior high school is like mine was like a

0:37:19.080 --> 0:37:21.400
<v Speaker 2>class of twenty seven, and then I graduated and went

0:37:21.400 --> 0:37:22.279
<v Speaker 2>to high school and there.

0:37:22.160 --> 0:37:23.720
<v Speaker 1>Were four thousand thousand people.

0:37:24.000 --> 0:37:26.919
<v Speaker 2>It's a culture shock. Initially you're nervous, you can't find

0:37:26.960 --> 0:37:29.959
<v Speaker 2>your way around. I wore uniform for my entire life,

0:37:30.000 --> 0:37:31.920
<v Speaker 2>so I'm trying to figure out my own personal style.

0:37:32.320 --> 0:37:35.120
<v Speaker 2>So I know, my freshman and sophomore year, I was

0:37:35.200 --> 0:37:38.920
<v Speaker 2>dressed like, you know, somebody's Jamaican daughter, Like I know.

0:37:38.920 --> 0:37:44.239
<v Speaker 1>I was.

0:37:43.800 --> 0:37:46.600
<v Speaker 2>Imagine going to high school like I had just got braces.

0:37:47.640 --> 0:37:51.000
<v Speaker 2>My freshman year Conway for real.

0:37:50.840 --> 0:37:54.479
<v Speaker 3>Though, yeah, we all were.

0:37:54.680 --> 0:37:57.040
<v Speaker 2>We always wear like baggy clothes like I had no

0:37:57.239 --> 0:38:00.920
<v Speaker 2>sense videos no sense of identity. I was trying to

0:38:00.920 --> 0:38:03.160
<v Speaker 2>figure everything out. So it's like you're going into that

0:38:03.160 --> 0:38:05.120
<v Speaker 2>half of its culture shock, you know, so you're trying

0:38:05.120 --> 0:38:07.480
<v Speaker 2>to find your way through and find your confidence in it.

0:38:07.480 --> 0:38:09.080
<v Speaker 2>It took me to about junior year. I need, I'm

0:38:09.080 --> 0:38:11.960
<v Speaker 2>not gonna lie second half junior year then I was like, oh,

0:38:12.000 --> 0:38:13.640
<v Speaker 2>this is this is the flex.

0:38:13.400 --> 0:38:14.000
<v Speaker 1>That I'm trying to be.

0:38:14.520 --> 0:38:18.000
<v Speaker 2>School uniform see going through See Jackson will have that

0:38:18.040 --> 0:38:18.760
<v Speaker 2>through high school.

0:38:19.600 --> 0:38:21.480
<v Speaker 1>I had to learn how not to run closed.

0:38:21.640 --> 0:38:24.960
<v Speaker 3>I had to learn how not like imagine you twelve,

0:38:25.000 --> 0:38:27.640
<v Speaker 3>you and seventh grade, and this is my favorite shirt.

0:38:27.719 --> 0:38:30.759
<v Speaker 1>I'm with my favorite shirt every Friday till somebody said

0:38:30.800 --> 0:38:32.280
<v Speaker 1>that I always wear that shirt Friday.

0:38:32.280 --> 0:38:38.359
<v Speaker 3>And you're like, oh, that's the problem running that shirt.

0:38:38.400 --> 0:38:39.879
<v Speaker 3>And you're like, oh, this is a day I can't,

0:38:40.120 --> 0:38:42.719
<v Speaker 3>so you don't wear that shirt ever again. And now

0:38:42.800 --> 0:38:44.240
<v Speaker 3>that becomes like a thing where.

0:38:44.360 --> 0:38:46.239
<v Speaker 1>You know that that that like stuck with me.

0:38:46.400 --> 0:38:48.000
<v Speaker 2>Oh for really, it happened to me too. I had

0:38:48.040 --> 0:38:49.480
<v Speaker 2>this one outfit that I got to wear to this

0:38:49.560 --> 0:38:52.040
<v Speaker 2>birthday party. It was actually Richard Dunk's birthday party in

0:38:52.080 --> 0:38:53.680
<v Speaker 2>high school. I think it was like a sixteenth birthday

0:38:54.120 --> 0:38:56.320
<v Speaker 2>and I got this matching guest say. It was like

0:38:56.320 --> 0:38:58.480
<v Speaker 2>a capri pant with a halty top and it was

0:38:58.640 --> 0:39:00.680
<v Speaker 2>so cute and I got so many kind compliments that night,

0:39:00.760 --> 0:39:02.360
<v Speaker 2>so I was like, oh, people love this outfit. I

0:39:02.440 --> 0:39:04.359
<v Speaker 2>love this outfit. I feel good in it. I ended

0:39:04.440 --> 0:39:06.640
<v Speaker 2>up wearing it again like the next month or something else,

0:39:06.760 --> 0:39:08.440
<v Speaker 2>not knowing that that was a faux pat. I just

0:39:08.520 --> 0:39:10.839
<v Speaker 2>wore it again because it was my favorite moment time

0:39:11.239 --> 0:39:13.560
<v Speaker 2>and people talked about me so bad. How could he

0:39:13.719 --> 0:39:14.560
<v Speaker 2>wore this outfit?

0:39:14.920 --> 0:39:19.680
<v Speaker 4>Like again, as kids, that's crazy. I didn't deal with

0:39:19.800 --> 0:39:22.480
<v Speaker 4>teasing until I got to junior high school. Like it

0:39:22.600 --> 0:39:23.200
<v Speaker 4>was me too.

0:39:23.840 --> 0:39:24.800
<v Speaker 2>That was in high school for me.

0:39:25.440 --> 0:39:27.600
<v Speaker 5>I want to make sure I got teased at home.

0:39:27.640 --> 0:39:28.840
<v Speaker 5>I didn't get teased at school.

0:39:29.280 --> 0:39:31.640
<v Speaker 2>Well, if you get teased at home, so developed, Yeah,

0:39:31.719 --> 0:39:34.960
<v Speaker 2>you developed a rip skin, you know, within our families.

0:39:35.719 --> 0:39:37.000
<v Speaker 5>Shoot, that's why I had to move.

0:39:37.080 --> 0:39:41.320
<v Speaker 6>I had to get away from my hating as sisters, haters.

0:39:41.480 --> 0:39:44.040
<v Speaker 6>Bro I was just looking at a picture of me

0:39:44.120 --> 0:39:45.520
<v Speaker 6>and my dad. I think I must have been like

0:39:45.680 --> 0:39:50.080
<v Speaker 6>fifteen or sixteen, and I used to wear it made

0:39:50.120 --> 0:39:52.160
<v Speaker 6>me remember I used to wear my belts with the

0:39:52.280 --> 0:39:55.719
<v Speaker 6>buckle off to the side because I like, I just

0:39:55.960 --> 0:39:59.040
<v Speaker 6>liked how it looked with you know, the they were,

0:39:59.200 --> 0:40:02.400
<v Speaker 6>you know, the little meta. I just wanted it all

0:40:02.480 --> 0:40:03.880
<v Speaker 6>to be like that in the front. I ain't want

0:40:03.880 --> 0:40:06.080
<v Speaker 6>the buckle to be in a way. And I was like, damn,

0:40:06.160 --> 0:40:12.680
<v Speaker 6>I was really a mother fucking individual. I went on nobody. No,

0:40:13.400 --> 0:40:15.520
<v Speaker 6>I wasn't getting teased that school once again. But by

0:40:15.640 --> 0:40:17.560
<v Speaker 6>this time I was living with my dad, like as

0:40:17.560 --> 0:40:19.960
<v Speaker 6>an only child, so I wasn't getting at home either.

0:40:20.120 --> 0:40:21.719
<v Speaker 2>But I'm sure you wore that belt, bucal to the

0:40:21.760 --> 0:40:25.200
<v Speaker 2>sideway confidence, so nobody could tell you shit. That's what

0:40:25.280 --> 0:40:27.120
<v Speaker 2>I love about Jackson. For example, he just went to

0:40:27.200 --> 0:40:30.440
<v Speaker 2>his eighth grade dance and the dress code was to

0:40:30.560 --> 0:40:34.320
<v Speaker 2>wear you know, like you know, tie shirt, jacket, whatever

0:40:34.400 --> 0:40:37.439
<v Speaker 2>sports code, and coming off of the Michael Jackson movie,

0:40:37.480 --> 0:40:39.840
<v Speaker 2>he was so inspired to say he he hit us

0:40:39.920 --> 0:40:43.080
<v Speaker 2>in the group chat Me, Devo and Kwame because you know,

0:40:43.360 --> 0:40:46.040
<v Speaker 2>Kwame is like and love is Michael Jackson like obsessed.

0:40:46.360 --> 0:40:48.480
<v Speaker 2>So he's like, I want to wear an outfit for

0:40:48.640 --> 0:40:50.840
<v Speaker 2>my spring dance, but I don't want it to be

0:40:50.960 --> 0:40:53.480
<v Speaker 2>like a costume. I want to pay homage to MJ.

0:40:53.840 --> 0:40:56.399
<v Speaker 2>So it was like, I got you. So he put

0:40:56.400 --> 0:40:58.520
<v Speaker 2>together this fly jacket. It was like a leather jacket

0:40:58.600 --> 0:41:00.759
<v Speaker 2>of course, with like the Rangates design in the front,

0:41:01.160 --> 0:41:04.160
<v Speaker 2>with a bow tie dress shirt, slacks that were a

0:41:04.200 --> 0:41:06.759
<v Speaker 2>little high with video yes.

0:41:06.880 --> 0:41:07.319
<v Speaker 5>Oh cool.

0:41:07.400 --> 0:41:09.040
<v Speaker 2>Yes, you guys don't see the picture in the light

0:41:09.080 --> 0:41:11.120
<v Speaker 2>of day because he told us we cannot post it

0:41:11.160 --> 0:41:13.719
<v Speaker 2>and we're fine with that. Okay, so we'll show y'all.

0:41:14.320 --> 0:41:15.680
<v Speaker 1>But he showed.

0:41:15.840 --> 0:41:17.960
<v Speaker 3>I was just about to say I was about to

0:41:17.960 --> 0:41:19.960
<v Speaker 3>show it, but I realized that he did tell us

0:41:20.000 --> 0:41:20.520
<v Speaker 3>he ain't want.

0:41:20.520 --> 0:41:23.839
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, but he looked so fly. He looks so fly,

0:41:24.640 --> 0:41:27.520
<v Speaker 2>and he walked into that dance with such confidence. He

0:41:27.640 --> 0:41:30.000
<v Speaker 2>was a little fifteen minutes past the start time because

0:41:30.000 --> 0:41:31.319
<v Speaker 2>he was like, I got to get there. My friends

0:41:31.320 --> 0:41:33.399
<v Speaker 2>are there before six o'clock. I said, the party started six,

0:41:33.520 --> 0:41:36.200
<v Speaker 2>walking there six five, so you can make a statements.

0:41:36.560 --> 0:41:38.120
<v Speaker 2>But I was just so proud of him in that

0:41:38.239 --> 0:41:40.680
<v Speaker 2>moment because he was not letting anybody to turn him

0:41:40.719 --> 0:41:43.440
<v Speaker 2>for what he saw as his look for this dance.

0:41:44.239 --> 0:41:46.080
<v Speaker 2>You know, so while everybody was in their suits and

0:41:46.160 --> 0:41:48.520
<v Speaker 2>ties and looking great, he was in there making his

0:41:48.600 --> 0:41:51.359
<v Speaker 2>own statement and confidently walking in that. And I, as

0:41:51.400 --> 0:41:55.040
<v Speaker 2>he's getting older, I love that he feels equipped to

0:41:55.160 --> 0:41:57.600
<v Speaker 2>know that I'm confident with who I am, how I

0:41:57.719 --> 0:41:59.960
<v Speaker 2>look what I want to do. I'm not seeking affirmation

0:42:00.000 --> 0:42:02.600
<v Speaker 2>and from everybody else. They had an after party after

0:42:02.680 --> 0:42:05.160
<v Speaker 2>the spring dance, and I was like, yo, I didn't

0:42:05.200 --> 0:42:06.839
<v Speaker 2>know that such and such was having an after party.

0:42:06.880 --> 0:42:09.200
<v Speaker 2>Did everyone go or what happened? He was like, yeah,

0:42:09.440 --> 0:42:10.640
<v Speaker 2>I thought about it, but I know I had a

0:42:10.680 --> 0:42:12.160
<v Speaker 2>game early the next morning, so I said, let me

0:42:12.239 --> 0:42:13.439
<v Speaker 2>just come straight home against some rest.

0:42:13.680 --> 0:42:13.879
<v Speaker 4>Yeah.

0:42:13.960 --> 0:42:19.200
<v Speaker 2>Man, So I was like, man, does that at fifteen boy.

0:42:19.320 --> 0:42:24.120
<v Speaker 6>When I was fifteen, I joined this group Zinos, and

0:42:24.400 --> 0:42:27.920
<v Speaker 6>we had an initiation. We had done it all summer,

0:42:28.160 --> 0:42:30.120
<v Speaker 6>like it was kind of like a sorority. So we

0:42:30.239 --> 0:42:32.799
<v Speaker 6>had been like pledging all summer, and then we had

0:42:32.840 --> 0:42:36.640
<v Speaker 6>our initiation ceremony on a Sunday. First of all, my dad,

0:42:37.080 --> 0:42:39.440
<v Speaker 6>you said, do everything last minute. My dad would be

0:42:39.480 --> 0:42:41.839
<v Speaker 6>late to everything. So of course that Sunday I had

0:42:41.880 --> 0:42:45.520
<v Speaker 6>to go find a white dress for this initiation ceremony.

0:42:46.200 --> 0:42:50.840
<v Speaker 6>So the night before this, I had went out with

0:42:50.960 --> 0:42:53.760
<v Speaker 6>some of my white friends. Somebody gave me some alcohol.

0:42:53.840 --> 0:42:57.440
<v Speaker 6>It was like Bacardi won fifty one and they were

0:42:57.480 --> 0:42:58.880
<v Speaker 6>like take a shot. I'm like okay, and then I

0:42:59.000 --> 0:43:00.880
<v Speaker 6>was like whoa instant regret.

0:43:02.000 --> 0:43:02.799
<v Speaker 5>So me and my dad.

0:43:07.600 --> 0:43:09.560
<v Speaker 6>So then me and my dad, it's the middle it's

0:43:09.800 --> 0:43:11.759
<v Speaker 6>the middle of summer too, so it's hot as hell.

0:43:11.840 --> 0:43:13.680
<v Speaker 6>Me and my dad gotta go to the mall. We

0:43:13.800 --> 0:43:17.040
<v Speaker 6>go to this outdoor shopping center and I'm like, oh

0:43:17.120 --> 0:43:18.879
<v Speaker 6>my god, I can't even look for a white dress

0:43:18.920 --> 0:43:20.080
<v Speaker 6>because I'm so hungover.

0:43:20.880 --> 0:43:23.720
<v Speaker 5>I'm like, help me please.

0:43:24.280 --> 0:43:27.120
<v Speaker 6>So finally were about to leave and I just puked

0:43:27.120 --> 0:43:29.200
<v Speaker 6>all over my dad's car and he was like, what

0:43:29.320 --> 0:43:31.040
<v Speaker 6>the hell did you have at that party last night?

0:43:31.480 --> 0:43:35.640
<v Speaker 6>I couldn't think of anything. I just said Caybody's birth.

0:43:37.400 --> 0:43:38.200
<v Speaker 1>Hell yeah yeah.

0:43:38.360 --> 0:43:41.200
<v Speaker 6>But my point is not once did I think to

0:43:41.320 --> 0:43:45.320
<v Speaker 6>myself before going to that party I got something.

0:43:45.080 --> 0:43:48.839
<v Speaker 2>To do with tomorrow? Yeah? Yeah, I know even now.

0:43:49.120 --> 0:43:51.520
<v Speaker 2>If that was me, i'd have been outside. And it's

0:43:51.520 --> 0:43:53.400
<v Speaker 2>a part two because my parents had such a like

0:43:53.560 --> 0:43:55.759
<v Speaker 2>tight hold on me that I would have wanted to

0:43:55.800 --> 0:43:58.480
<v Speaker 2>be outside. We don't do that with Jackson. He does

0:43:58.520 --> 0:44:00.320
<v Speaker 2>everything he's supposed to do. That we have to almost

0:44:00.360 --> 0:44:02.440
<v Speaker 2>encourage him to go to things like you want to

0:44:02.520 --> 0:44:04.319
<v Speaker 2>chill with your friends, y'all want to do something cool,

0:44:04.400 --> 0:44:07.279
<v Speaker 2>Let's do that. It's cool, like having the latitude to

0:44:07.360 --> 0:44:08.800
<v Speaker 2>do it doesn't make it a mistique.

0:44:08.840 --> 0:44:10.759
<v Speaker 3>The thing is, we made a choice years ago that

0:44:10.840 --> 0:44:13.399
<v Speaker 3>we were no longer going to raise our boys through

0:44:13.600 --> 0:44:16.000
<v Speaker 3>anyone else's lens. For example, remember I said to help

0:44:16.080 --> 0:44:18.320
<v Speaker 3>him with confidence, I'm not gonna tell him, yoll go

0:44:18.360 --> 0:44:20.600
<v Speaker 3>brush your teeth because girls are going to say your breasting,

0:44:20.920 --> 0:44:22.879
<v Speaker 3>brush your teeth because if you don't, you get ginger

0:44:22.920 --> 0:44:25.480
<v Speaker 3>vitis and your teeth can fall out. We really started

0:44:25.520 --> 0:44:28.239
<v Speaker 3>doing that, and when it's time for him to make decisions.

0:44:28.600 --> 0:44:31.080
<v Speaker 3>For example, with his hair, he was like, Dad, should

0:44:31.080 --> 0:44:31.960
<v Speaker 3>I twist my hair like this?

0:44:32.120 --> 0:44:33.800
<v Speaker 1>Or twist it back? I said, why are you asking me?

0:44:35.560 --> 0:44:37.560
<v Speaker 1>How I feel about your hair? Doesn't matter. Do you

0:44:37.760 --> 0:44:39.800
<v Speaker 1>like it like this? He's like, yeah, I do, so

0:44:39.960 --> 0:44:42.640
<v Speaker 1>then do it. And I always support him in whatever.

0:44:42.480 --> 0:44:45.120
<v Speaker 3>The decision is, even if the decision doesn't work out

0:44:45.160 --> 0:44:47.080
<v Speaker 3>the way he wanted it to. I said, Bro, you

0:44:47.120 --> 0:44:47.760
<v Speaker 3>made a decision.

0:44:47.800 --> 0:44:49.080
<v Speaker 1>You got to pivot. Pivot, I got you.

0:44:49.600 --> 0:44:52.040
<v Speaker 3>I think doing that more with our kids is allowing

0:44:52.120 --> 0:44:55.319
<v Speaker 3>them to feel comfortable being free thinkers and being free

0:44:55.400 --> 0:44:57.800
<v Speaker 3>in their skins, so they don't feel like I gotta

0:44:57.840 --> 0:45:00.200
<v Speaker 3>be how everybody else is, because that's the heart sting

0:45:00.280 --> 0:45:00.880
<v Speaker 3>in high school.

0:45:01.000 --> 0:45:02.200
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, you get to high school.

0:45:02.239 --> 0:45:03.600
<v Speaker 3>It's like if you don't fit in early and you

0:45:03.719 --> 0:45:06.240
<v Speaker 3>become the outcast, Now you got to spend four years

0:45:06.680 --> 0:45:09.920
<v Speaker 3>of people just shitting on you because it's fun for

0:45:10.040 --> 0:45:11.600
<v Speaker 3>them because they all feel the same way.

0:45:11.680 --> 0:45:14.120
<v Speaker 1>But you're the only one that stands out is the outcast.

0:45:13.800 --> 0:45:16.719
<v Speaker 4>Right, And that's the thing I think individualism is not.

0:45:17.640 --> 0:45:20.920
<v Speaker 4>We're not preaching that individualism is something that you can

0:45:21.000 --> 0:45:25.239
<v Speaker 4>aspire to be right, I remember myself like I wanted to.

0:45:25.920 --> 0:45:29.000
<v Speaker 4>I went to high school more timid than anything else.

0:45:29.560 --> 0:45:32.400
<v Speaker 4>I spent all these years in private school, and then

0:45:32.440 --> 0:45:34.240
<v Speaker 4>I went to junior high school, where I just felt

0:45:34.320 --> 0:45:38.680
<v Speaker 4>like an outcast. I was younger, and then when I

0:45:38.719 --> 0:45:42.200
<v Speaker 4>went to high school again, I'm younger than everybody else. Yep,

0:45:42.719 --> 0:45:47.560
<v Speaker 4>so I wasn't I wasn't groomed or prepped to be

0:45:47.760 --> 0:45:51.800
<v Speaker 4>like a leader. Right, I'm literally in there following everybody

0:45:51.840 --> 0:45:54.080
<v Speaker 4>else because I'm the youngest kid there and I'm just

0:45:54.160 --> 0:45:56.319
<v Speaker 4>trying to fit in. And I think that I had

0:45:56.640 --> 0:45:58.399
<v Speaker 4>funny enough. I had a conversation with my mother about

0:45:58.400 --> 0:46:01.240
<v Speaker 4>it the other day. I think it's a recipe for disaster.

0:46:01.400 --> 0:46:04.800
<v Speaker 4>Thankfully everything worked out, but I think it's a recipe

0:46:04.840 --> 0:46:08.440
<v Speaker 4>for disaster to send kids that are younger than their

0:46:08.600 --> 0:46:13.560
<v Speaker 4>environment in any space, because you're dealing with first off,

0:46:13.600 --> 0:46:15.800
<v Speaker 4>you don't know nothing. You don't know anything, and you

0:46:15.840 --> 0:46:18.480
<v Speaker 4>could be a smart kid, but you're still stupid, like

0:46:18.600 --> 0:46:21.800
<v Speaker 4>you just the kids don't. You can't rush maturity exactly.

0:46:21.920 --> 0:46:24.800
<v Speaker 4>And I think, yeah, it's lack of knowledge. And I

0:46:24.880 --> 0:46:29.719
<v Speaker 4>think for me, dealing with not knowing like how the

0:46:29.800 --> 0:46:32.320
<v Speaker 4>world works. And then on top of that, trying to

0:46:32.480 --> 0:46:36.080
<v Speaker 4>fit in, trying to make friends, trying to be a

0:46:36.160 --> 0:46:38.440
<v Speaker 4>guy that girls like, like, you're just you're doing so

0:46:38.520 --> 0:46:41.240
<v Speaker 4>many things and every single thing feels like a mistake.

0:46:41.600 --> 0:46:43.680
<v Speaker 4>You don't feel like you're doing anything because you're doing

0:46:43.760 --> 0:46:46.840
<v Speaker 4>it for the sake of, you know, this solid decision

0:46:46.880 --> 0:46:48.719
<v Speaker 4>that I'm making, Like Jackson, I'm not going to do

0:46:48.840 --> 0:46:51.480
<v Speaker 4>this because or or trouble. I'm not going to do

0:46:51.560 --> 0:46:54.680
<v Speaker 4>this because I got something important tomorrow. It's more or

0:46:54.719 --> 0:46:56.360
<v Speaker 4>less like, let me just do it just just because

0:46:56.360 --> 0:46:56.920
<v Speaker 4>I want to fit in.

0:46:57.239 --> 0:46:59.440
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, Well, it's funny you talk about that.

0:47:00.080 --> 0:47:03.759
<v Speaker 3>When I was at poly Prep and I worked at

0:47:03.760 --> 0:47:06.400
<v Speaker 3>Polyprep for two years, and I noticed a lot of

0:47:06.520 --> 0:47:11.480
<v Speaker 3>the wealthier parents, their kids were older in middle school

0:47:11.480 --> 0:47:14.920
<v Speaker 3>in high school, and I was just like, like, you

0:47:15.000 --> 0:47:17.160
<v Speaker 3>held your something back and they was just like, yeah,

0:47:17.200 --> 0:47:17.680
<v Speaker 3>what's the rush?

0:47:18.080 --> 0:47:18.279
<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

0:47:18.719 --> 0:47:20.759
<v Speaker 3>And I was like, I was like, well, him get

0:47:20.760 --> 0:47:22.400
<v Speaker 3>out and be able to earn and he was. And

0:47:22.480 --> 0:47:25.040
<v Speaker 3>they always just say to me, once again, what's the rush.

0:47:25.880 --> 0:47:27.320
<v Speaker 3>I'm not going to pay for him to go to

0:47:27.440 --> 0:47:30.399
<v Speaker 3>college at seventeen and him tell me at twenty one

0:47:30.520 --> 0:47:32.360
<v Speaker 3>that he had no clue what he was doing and

0:47:32.480 --> 0:47:33.840
<v Speaker 3>he was just following everybody.

0:47:34.280 --> 0:47:36.600
<v Speaker 1>So I'm not doing that. When he's mature enough to

0:47:36.680 --> 0:47:38.480
<v Speaker 1>move to the next step, he'll move.

0:47:39.000 --> 0:47:41.520
<v Speaker 3>So in elementary school, when they noticed their kids are

0:47:41.560 --> 0:47:44.120
<v Speaker 3>still like very immature, they hold them back to elementary school.

0:47:44.000 --> 0:47:46.879
<v Speaker 1>Like what's the rush? And I started realizing, like there

0:47:47.000 --> 0:47:49.359
<v Speaker 1>is something to maturity in academia.

0:47:50.239 --> 0:47:53.040
<v Speaker 3>And so you said socially, when you go into a

0:47:53.120 --> 0:47:56.400
<v Speaker 3>place and say, for example, like Tori and Sakari, they

0:47:56.480 --> 0:47:59.040
<v Speaker 3>both started school early because they were the third child,

0:47:59.440 --> 0:48:01.799
<v Speaker 3>and since they were the third child, they got things quick,

0:48:02.200 --> 0:48:03.600
<v Speaker 3>so our parents put them in school.

0:48:03.640 --> 0:48:04.439
<v Speaker 1>You three go to school.

0:48:04.520 --> 0:48:06.080
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, it's also a flex too. It's just like, oh

0:48:06.120 --> 0:48:09.800
<v Speaker 2>my child is advanced. My child is and it's just

0:48:09.920 --> 0:48:11.440
<v Speaker 2>like okay, Like you go to.

0:48:11.560 --> 0:48:13.960
<v Speaker 3>Sixteen and a senior in high school, and we watched

0:48:14.000 --> 0:48:16.920
<v Speaker 3>it in college. There were seventeen and sixteen year old

0:48:16.920 --> 0:48:19.399
<v Speaker 3>girls in college. All them girls were acting wild because

0:48:19.440 --> 0:48:22.200
<v Speaker 3>they were trying to fit in to the older girls

0:48:22.239 --> 0:48:25.439
<v Speaker 3>who had already developed, you know, emotionally. Now these younger

0:48:25.480 --> 0:48:28.279
<v Speaker 3>girls are doing anything to just fit in, and I'm like,

0:48:28.640 --> 0:48:30.759
<v Speaker 3>I would never send my sixteen year old child.

0:48:31.040 --> 0:48:32.960
<v Speaker 4>It's a detriment because It's the same thing.

0:48:33.000 --> 0:48:35.680
<v Speaker 3>The young dudes that came into play sports. They all

0:48:35.719 --> 0:48:39.120
<v Speaker 3>struggled with alcoholism because they were trying to be so grown.

0:48:39.600 --> 0:48:42.239
<v Speaker 3>And you're seventeen and now you're in college and you're

0:48:42.239 --> 0:48:44.000
<v Speaker 3>trying to fit in with the twenty one year olds.

0:48:44.040 --> 0:48:45.880
<v Speaker 3>It's like you're not mature enough to understand what's going on.

0:48:46.480 --> 0:48:50.239
<v Speaker 4>The difference like a year can make, yes, right, if

0:48:50.280 --> 0:48:54.120
<v Speaker 4>you've only lived in this earth for fourteen, fifteen, sixteen years,

0:48:54.760 --> 0:48:58.920
<v Speaker 4>the difference one year can make on your maturity. I

0:48:59.000 --> 0:49:01.440
<v Speaker 4>didn't know at that head at that age, but now

0:49:01.560 --> 0:49:03.799
<v Speaker 4>looking back at it, and even having my own child,

0:49:03.880 --> 0:49:07.640
<v Speaker 4>like she's eleven, she's way smarter than she is now,

0:49:07.719 --> 0:49:09.920
<v Speaker 4>and that when she was ten, and that same thing

0:49:10.000 --> 0:49:11.959
<v Speaker 4>for five and six and you know, six or seven

0:49:12.000 --> 0:49:12.360
<v Speaker 4>and all that.

0:49:12.480 --> 0:49:15.960
<v Speaker 3>So imagine this, though you're a young child and you

0:49:16.080 --> 0:49:18.320
<v Speaker 3>in a group, you eleven, but everybody else in that

0:49:18.360 --> 0:49:21.879
<v Speaker 3>group is twelve. You don't feel like doing whatever they're doing,

0:49:22.000 --> 0:49:24.680
<v Speaker 3>but you're the young one. It's way easier for the

0:49:24.760 --> 0:49:25.759
<v Speaker 3>people to be like, yo, do this.

0:49:26.600 --> 0:49:28.840
<v Speaker 1>But imagine you are older.

0:49:28.680 --> 0:49:31.960
<v Speaker 3>Twelve and there's some younger twelves and hey, we're all

0:49:32.040 --> 0:49:33.960
<v Speaker 3>doing this, and you could be like, I'm not doing that,

0:49:34.520 --> 0:49:35.680
<v Speaker 3>I'm not listening to y'all.

0:49:35.840 --> 0:49:38.920
<v Speaker 1>That maturity, that one year difference.

0:49:39.320 --> 0:49:41.719
<v Speaker 3>Makes that child feel more confident in who they are

0:49:41.880 --> 0:49:44.359
<v Speaker 3>to say I'm not following the group just because y'all

0:49:44.400 --> 0:49:44.719
<v Speaker 3>a group.

0:49:44.880 --> 0:49:47.400
<v Speaker 5>Yeah, and having older siblings definitely helps with that.

0:49:48.200 --> 0:49:51.360
<v Speaker 6>I've always I have a summer birthday, so I usually

0:49:51.480 --> 0:49:54.319
<v Speaker 6>turned the age everybody else was after the school year

0:49:54.400 --> 0:49:57.240
<v Speaker 6>was over, exact. Yeah, So but I never felt pressure

0:49:57.239 --> 0:49:59.920
<v Speaker 6>because I got older sisters at home. That was hey

0:50:00.239 --> 0:50:04.680
<v Speaker 6>s as I previously stated, so I had.

0:50:04.640 --> 0:50:05.279
<v Speaker 5>To stand up to them.

0:50:05.360 --> 0:50:09.239
<v Speaker 6>Plus seventh my high school started in seventh grade, so

0:50:09.960 --> 0:50:12.160
<v Speaker 6>I went to the same school from seventh grade until

0:50:12.239 --> 0:50:13.000
<v Speaker 6>I graduated.

0:50:14.400 --> 0:50:16.120
<v Speaker 5>And seventh grade it's.

0:50:16.120 --> 0:50:18.360
<v Speaker 6>Almost like they kind of trick you, you know, so

0:50:18.480 --> 0:50:21.480
<v Speaker 6>they're like, we my high school is very academic, so

0:50:21.560 --> 0:50:23.279
<v Speaker 6>they're like, you're gonna have a lot of textbooks.

0:50:23.320 --> 0:50:24.640
<v Speaker 5>You got to take them home because you have a

0:50:24.680 --> 0:50:25.320
<v Speaker 5>lot of homework.

0:50:25.600 --> 0:50:30.120
<v Speaker 6>So we all like, let's get rolling book bagh grade.

0:50:30.160 --> 0:50:32.760
<v Speaker 6>You take your rolling book back to school and between

0:50:33.239 --> 0:50:36.560
<v Speaker 6>you know, classes, the hallways pack. I don't want to

0:50:36.600 --> 0:50:39.160
<v Speaker 6>walk behind your fucking rolling book bag. So people would

0:50:39.200 --> 0:50:42.520
<v Speaker 6>like kitkick it book bag over and now you carrying

0:50:42.600 --> 0:50:44.880
<v Speaker 6>your heavy ass rolling book bag, because not only do

0:50:44.960 --> 0:50:46.920
<v Speaker 6>you have all these books in it, it has wheels

0:50:47.080 --> 0:50:47.279
<v Speaker 6>on that.

0:50:48.520 --> 0:50:51.319
<v Speaker 5>So then you have to you have to learn how

0:50:51.400 --> 0:50:53.520
<v Speaker 5>to use your locker. You know what I'm saying. You

0:50:53.600 --> 0:50:57.400
<v Speaker 5>got to learn how to prioritize. And you kind of

0:50:57.760 --> 0:50:58.239
<v Speaker 5>you kind of.

0:51:00.080 --> 0:51:07.080
<v Speaker 4>You know, I didn't know why I was not allowed

0:51:09.960 --> 0:51:14.239
<v Speaker 4>in fifth grade my mother rolling book back and my

0:51:14.360 --> 0:51:15.560
<v Speaker 4>older brother and his friends.

0:51:18.120 --> 0:51:20.200
<v Speaker 1>That's what happened. They're gonna kick them.

0:51:20.280 --> 0:51:26.000
<v Speaker 2>Rolling should be like I'm preparing for all the flights

0:51:26.000 --> 0:51:33.680
<v Speaker 2>I'm about to take. As I'm sitting in first class,

0:51:33.719 --> 0:51:37.320
<v Speaker 2>I'll watch you walk to the economy. Don't do that.

0:51:37.840 --> 0:51:38.200
<v Speaker 1>Don't do that.

0:51:39.800 --> 0:51:42.399
<v Speaker 4>You either a jazz sport or north face or something.

0:51:42.480 --> 0:51:46.320
<v Speaker 4>But you was not. You would just go with it

0:51:46.360 --> 0:51:46.640
<v Speaker 4>to me.

0:51:49.160 --> 0:51:51.320
<v Speaker 6>And a rolling book bag. It costs a pretty penny,

0:51:51.360 --> 0:51:52.920
<v Speaker 6>you know what I'm saying. So I'm like, we're balling

0:51:53.000 --> 0:51:55.719
<v Speaker 6>out on a rolling book bag. I stopped carrying that

0:51:55.840 --> 0:51:59.080
<v Speaker 6>thing about halfway through the school. Everything that happened to you,

0:51:59.840 --> 0:52:03.480
<v Speaker 6>but it like accelerates your growth, you know, you learn

0:52:03.600 --> 0:52:05.800
<v Speaker 6>how to navigate the spaces a little bit better, a

0:52:05.840 --> 0:52:08.719
<v Speaker 6>little bit faster because the older upper classmen are not

0:52:09.000 --> 0:52:10.200
<v Speaker 6>showing you no mercy.

0:52:10.760 --> 0:52:11.880
<v Speaker 5>We used to have a system.

0:52:11.960 --> 0:52:15.040
<v Speaker 6>You know, you walk down a certain side of the stairwheel,

0:52:15.040 --> 0:52:18.240
<v Speaker 6>you walk through a certain door when we're changing classes.

0:52:18.280 --> 0:52:21.000
<v Speaker 6>If you walking through the wrong door, you're getting knocked over.

0:52:23.480 --> 0:52:26.239
<v Speaker 6>Nobody cares. So that it like accelerated your growth, and

0:52:26.360 --> 0:52:28.400
<v Speaker 6>it didn't make you want to be like them, because

0:52:28.520 --> 0:52:31.080
<v Speaker 6>you know, we were separated enough that like we didn't

0:52:31.120 --> 0:52:34.520
<v Speaker 6>have the same lunch period as ten to eleven twelfth graders.

0:52:35.600 --> 0:52:37.880
<v Speaker 6>We didn't have the same classes unless you're like in

0:52:38.560 --> 0:52:40.200
<v Speaker 6>senior orchestra as the seventh grader.

0:52:40.360 --> 0:52:41.320
<v Speaker 1>How big was your school?

0:52:42.040 --> 0:52:43.240
<v Speaker 5>Three thousand students?

0:52:43.800 --> 0:52:46.400
<v Speaker 3>I still think this is you can't put seventh graders

0:52:46.440 --> 0:52:48.080
<v Speaker 3>in the school with twelfth grader.

0:52:48.160 --> 0:52:50.680
<v Speaker 1>Y yeah, eighteen ninety years old. Them kids are twelve.

0:52:50.960 --> 0:52:53.360
<v Speaker 6>The other the other the other thing about it is

0:52:53.440 --> 0:52:55.600
<v Speaker 6>that you can fail out in seventh and eighth grade.

0:52:55.640 --> 0:52:58.600
<v Speaker 6>If you get three f's, you can't go to the

0:52:58.640 --> 0:53:01.880
<v Speaker 6>school anymore. So it's like you have to be focused.

0:53:01.960 --> 0:53:04.840
<v Speaker 6>You can be running behind people. Upperclassmen are meant to

0:53:04.880 --> 0:53:07.960
<v Speaker 6>you anyway. You got to develop your own, you know,

0:53:08.160 --> 0:53:10.320
<v Speaker 6>sense of confidence and by eighth grade. You have so

0:53:10.480 --> 0:53:14.080
<v Speaker 6>much confidence that that you you you've learned how to

0:53:14.160 --> 0:53:16.520
<v Speaker 6>navigate the space, that it even creates more of an

0:53:16.520 --> 0:53:17.400
<v Speaker 6>acceleration for you.

0:53:17.520 --> 0:53:18.759
<v Speaker 5>But it was hard.

0:53:18.920 --> 0:53:20.000
<v Speaker 1>We used to torture the summer.

0:53:20.680 --> 0:53:22.640
<v Speaker 3>The sum readers didn't have roly book bags, but they

0:53:22.719 --> 0:53:24.600
<v Speaker 3>used to have all their textbooks. So what you Yeah,

0:53:24.760 --> 0:53:26.800
<v Speaker 3>if they booked bag while they're walking and then you

0:53:26.960 --> 0:53:28.439
<v Speaker 3>let it go and it would drop.

0:53:37.160 --> 0:53:40.200
<v Speaker 2>Oh my god, I guess that's that goes back to

0:53:40.360 --> 0:53:41.800
<v Speaker 2>saying we just be laughing this ship, you know what

0:53:42.600 --> 0:53:43.400
<v Speaker 2>about what's funny?

0:53:43.480 --> 0:53:44.400
<v Speaker 1>That's another thing I do.

0:53:45.320 --> 0:53:47.839
<v Speaker 3>I teach my kids how to fight because my father

0:53:48.000 --> 0:53:50.239
<v Speaker 3>was big on that. My father put us in mixed

0:53:50.320 --> 0:53:52.640
<v Speaker 3>martial arts taekwon doing jiu jitsu for five.

0:53:52.520 --> 0:53:57.360
<v Speaker 1>Years and we competed nationally. Jack I bought them bags downstairs.

0:53:57.960 --> 0:54:01.520
<v Speaker 4>Stuff was up. You call I seen Caro in that.

0:54:01.840 --> 0:54:03.759
<v Speaker 1>That's not go fight Caro.

0:54:04.640 --> 0:54:07.279
<v Speaker 4>I won't go fight that is.

0:54:09.360 --> 0:54:12.359
<v Speaker 1>That's the point. I don't want you dancing around people.

0:54:12.440 --> 0:54:15.359
<v Speaker 1>If you get into a fight ended and early.

0:54:15.440 --> 0:54:18.279
<v Speaker 3>That's my dad, because if you get in a fight

0:54:18.320 --> 0:54:19.960
<v Speaker 3>with somebody, you fall back and hit your head.

0:54:20.040 --> 0:54:21.080
<v Speaker 1>Now you incapacitated.

0:54:21.200 --> 0:54:24.600
<v Speaker 3>No we're not bullies. I don't want no issues with you, sir,

0:54:24.960 --> 0:54:27.040
<v Speaker 3>Please get out of my space. But if you and

0:54:27.200 --> 0:54:29.640
<v Speaker 3>if they in your space, learn how to handle that.

0:54:29.760 --> 0:54:32.360
<v Speaker 1>Put them down and say excuse me, miss, he touched me.

0:54:32.480 --> 0:54:32.719
<v Speaker 4>First.

0:54:33.440 --> 0:54:35.400
<v Speaker 3>I teach my boys that because one thing I'm not

0:54:35.440 --> 0:54:37.920
<v Speaker 3>gonna deal with is you being bullied. Do not come

0:54:38.000 --> 0:54:39.160
<v Speaker 3>in his house talking about some so.

0:54:39.200 --> 0:54:42.319
<v Speaker 1>And so is calling me names or bullying me on social.

0:54:42.320 --> 0:54:46.480
<v Speaker 3>Unfollowing them whoever's social unfollowing them like, we're not doing this,

0:54:47.760 --> 0:54:50.840
<v Speaker 3>block like I need that confidence.

0:54:52.239 --> 0:54:52.600
<v Speaker 4>For real.

0:54:53.840 --> 0:54:57.080
<v Speaker 3>Did you hear about the Division one athlete who ended

0:54:57.160 --> 0:54:59.879
<v Speaker 3>up killing himself because of his follower count?

0:55:00.360 --> 0:55:03.200
<v Speaker 1>No young man out here.

0:55:03.160 --> 0:55:06.480
<v Speaker 3>In Georgia, I think three star, four star and baseball

0:55:06.520 --> 0:55:10.280
<v Speaker 3>and football was having some mental issues. His parents admitted

0:55:10.280 --> 0:55:12.839
<v Speaker 3>he ended up killing himself, and they said that one

0:55:12.880 --> 0:55:14.400
<v Speaker 3>of his biggest things he kept talking about is he

0:55:14.440 --> 0:55:17.520
<v Speaker 3>doesn't get the buzz on social media.

0:55:18.120 --> 0:55:19.960
<v Speaker 2>Like for information on social media.

0:55:20.080 --> 0:55:22.360
<v Speaker 3>And then they're asking the parents and he was one

0:55:22.400 --> 0:55:24.960
<v Speaker 3>of those kids who was work hard, go to his room,

0:55:25.120 --> 0:55:27.520
<v Speaker 3>work hard, go to his room. The parents said they

0:55:27.520 --> 0:55:29.680
<v Speaker 3>didn't realize at any point that there was anything wrong

0:55:29.760 --> 0:55:31.239
<v Speaker 3>with their son. They just felt like he was a

0:55:31.320 --> 0:55:34.759
<v Speaker 3>normal fifteen year old kid that just went to his

0:55:34.880 --> 0:55:36.800
<v Speaker 3>room until they went to his room one morning.

0:55:37.239 --> 0:55:39.319
<v Speaker 1>He wasn't down for school in time, and they opened

0:55:39.360 --> 0:55:40.080
<v Speaker 1>that door and he was.

0:55:40.080 --> 0:55:42.320
<v Speaker 4>Gone, Damn, these devices are not normal.

0:55:42.719 --> 0:55:45.640
<v Speaker 3>Wow, bro, No, we got to make sure that our

0:55:45.760 --> 0:55:48.759
<v Speaker 3>kids are confident, confident fact.

0:55:49.480 --> 0:55:51.640
<v Speaker 2>All right, let's go confidently play these bills and we'll

0:55:51.680 --> 0:56:09.359
<v Speaker 2>be back with your listing letter of the day. All right,

0:56:09.480 --> 0:56:12.800
<v Speaker 2>Dear Devalcadein and the Ellis ever After crew. After listening

0:56:12.880 --> 0:56:16.279
<v Speaker 2>to the Beyond the Class episode, I'm writing to seek

0:56:16.280 --> 0:56:19.240
<v Speaker 2>your advice regarding my nearly three year old godson and cousin.

0:56:19.680 --> 0:56:21.760
<v Speaker 2>I want the best for him, but I'm increasingly concerned

0:56:21.800 --> 0:56:25.560
<v Speaker 2>about his current environment and developmental progress. His mother is

0:56:25.560 --> 0:56:28.000
<v Speaker 2>a single parent who works long hours, so he primarily

0:56:28.080 --> 0:56:32.759
<v Speaker 2>stays with his elderly grandparents, who have limited literacy. Unfortunately,

0:56:33.280 --> 0:56:36.120
<v Speaker 2>there is very little structure in either household. For example,

0:56:36.239 --> 0:56:38.319
<v Speaker 2>he often stays up till two am because he naps

0:56:38.400 --> 0:56:41.200
<v Speaker 2>late in the evening. Additionally, his father cannot read or

0:56:41.200 --> 0:56:45.600
<v Speaker 2>write and has another son with cognitive disabilities. I'm concerned

0:56:45.640 --> 0:56:49.200
<v Speaker 2>that he's not meeting typical developmental milestones. For his age,

0:56:49.239 --> 0:56:53.120
<v Speaker 2>His vocabulary is very limited and he still communicates primarily

0:56:53.160 --> 0:56:57.880
<v Speaker 2>through babbling and pointing. We have also found potty training

0:56:57.960 --> 0:57:00.600
<v Speaker 2>to be exceptionally difficult. When I spend time with him,

0:57:00.600 --> 0:57:03.880
<v Speaker 2>I noticed he has very short attention spans and struggles

0:57:03.920 --> 0:57:07.920
<v Speaker 2>to engage even with educational content such as videos on YouTube,

0:57:08.160 --> 0:57:09.919
<v Speaker 2>for more than two to three minutes at a time.

0:57:10.480 --> 0:57:13.440
<v Speaker 2>Given the lack of structure and his limited progress, what

0:57:13.600 --> 0:57:16.560
<v Speaker 2>steps would you recommend to help support his development? How

0:57:16.640 --> 0:57:19.680
<v Speaker 2>do I express my concerns his mother without overstepping Any

0:57:19.720 --> 0:57:22.720
<v Speaker 2>guidance or resources you could share would be greatly appreciated.

0:57:22.800 --> 0:57:23.600
<v Speaker 2>Thank you for listening.

0:57:24.440 --> 0:57:27.680
<v Speaker 3>The first thing is that mom has to be willing

0:57:27.760 --> 0:57:31.959
<v Speaker 3>to accept help. I've realized this with my prototype kids.

0:57:32.800 --> 0:57:35.960
<v Speaker 3>You can recognize something's wrong with a child and have

0:57:36.240 --> 0:57:39.000
<v Speaker 3>all good intent, but if that parent is not willing

0:57:39.080 --> 0:57:40.800
<v Speaker 3>to accept it, don't even waste your breath.

0:57:41.000 --> 0:57:42.960
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, and parents curse.

0:57:42.840 --> 0:57:44.960
<v Speaker 3>Me out, get easily offended, and later come back and

0:57:45.040 --> 0:57:47.000
<v Speaker 3>be like, ah, he was right, coachabal and I don't

0:57:47.000 --> 0:57:50.400
<v Speaker 3>take I don't take it personal. Yeah, but people's kids

0:57:50.440 --> 0:57:52.600
<v Speaker 3>are very personal to them, and when you point out

0:57:52.640 --> 0:57:56.040
<v Speaker 3>to someone that their child may be behind people sometimes

0:57:56.120 --> 0:57:57.720
<v Speaker 3>take it as an attack, like you're saying I'm a

0:57:57.800 --> 0:57:58.520
<v Speaker 3>bad parent.

0:57:58.360 --> 0:58:00.440
<v Speaker 1>So I would say be very careful with how you

0:58:00.520 --> 0:58:02.800
<v Speaker 1>approach it. But I do think the things that she

0:58:02.960 --> 0:58:04.960
<v Speaker 1>recognizes are spot on.

0:58:05.080 --> 0:58:07.520
<v Speaker 2>Oh for sure, children at that age, especially three year

0:58:07.520 --> 0:58:09.120
<v Speaker 2>old there, they're like sponges.

0:58:09.160 --> 0:58:09.920
<v Speaker 1>They need structure.

0:58:10.040 --> 0:58:13.880
<v Speaker 2>They need structure. So essentially whatever they're exposed to is

0:58:13.960 --> 0:58:17.560
<v Speaker 2>what they're going to absorb. And with them, consistency and

0:58:17.680 --> 0:58:21.560
<v Speaker 2>repetitive things are really essentially what will help them reach

0:58:21.640 --> 0:58:22.400
<v Speaker 2>those milestones.

0:58:22.480 --> 0:58:25.800
<v Speaker 3>But this is the problem note especially for this demographic

0:58:25.880 --> 0:58:28.160
<v Speaker 3>of kids at this age. When we were growing up,

0:58:28.200 --> 0:58:30.840
<v Speaker 3>if you left us with our parents, right and we played,

0:58:30.880 --> 0:58:33.680
<v Speaker 3>for example, a video game, you play a video game

0:58:33.720 --> 0:58:36.160
<v Speaker 3>that required you to focus on that video game, there

0:58:36.200 --> 0:58:38.320
<v Speaker 3>were consequences, right, you die in a video game, you

0:58:38.400 --> 0:58:41.800
<v Speaker 3>start over. These new games they have you pay to

0:58:41.920 --> 0:58:46.000
<v Speaker 3>keep playing, so there's no consequence, or you keep scrolling

0:58:46.080 --> 0:58:48.480
<v Speaker 3>and there's no end, so they have no attention span

0:58:48.600 --> 0:58:49.840
<v Speaker 3>because they just keep moving.

0:58:50.000 --> 0:58:52.439
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, they even such short from content is really bad

0:58:52.520 --> 0:58:54.320
<v Speaker 2>because you get what you got to get out of

0:58:54.360 --> 0:58:56.600
<v Speaker 2>the fifteen to twenty second video and you scroll to

0:58:56.680 --> 0:58:59.840
<v Speaker 2>the next thing. So attention spans have become that much shorter.

0:59:00.080 --> 0:59:03.040
<v Speaker 3>This is why structure is more important. I do like

0:59:03.080 --> 0:59:06.040
<v Speaker 3>the Monassori method for certain things, but I think kids

0:59:06.040 --> 0:59:08.880
<v Speaker 3>who need structure don't work well in the Montessori because.

0:59:08.960 --> 0:59:09.600
<v Speaker 2>It's too free.

0:59:09.880 --> 0:59:12.760
<v Speaker 3>Yes, and for example, for like our sons, I know

0:59:13.280 --> 0:59:16.160
<v Speaker 3>Cairo and Dakota are the type of kids if you

0:59:16.200 --> 0:59:18.640
<v Speaker 3>put them in a Montsory setting, they gonna play the

0:59:18.720 --> 0:59:21.320
<v Speaker 3>game and they're gonna be like, Yo, I just want

0:59:21.360 --> 0:59:24.200
<v Speaker 3>to do blocks and I want to go outside. You

0:59:24.360 --> 0:59:26.120
<v Speaker 3>need to tell them naw, you got to do forty

0:59:26.160 --> 0:59:29.520
<v Speaker 3>five minutes of arithmetic in order for them to learn that.

0:59:29.720 --> 0:59:31.600
<v Speaker 3>In life, sometimes you gotta do things that you don't

0:59:31.640 --> 0:59:34.080
<v Speaker 3>want to to get places you want to. So I

0:59:34.160 --> 0:59:36.440
<v Speaker 3>think with young kids like that, the more discipline you

0:59:36.480 --> 0:59:39.840
<v Speaker 3>can give them, the better. Take the electronics away, let

0:59:39.920 --> 0:59:43.080
<v Speaker 3>them work outside. But also, if the parents and the

0:59:43.120 --> 0:59:47.480
<v Speaker 3>adults around them have literacy issues, you gotta expect that

0:59:47.920 --> 0:59:49.720
<v Speaker 3>the child will have literacy issues as well.

0:59:49.880 --> 0:59:52.480
<v Speaker 2>Right, But I mean the elderly grandparents who have limited

0:59:52.520 --> 0:59:55.240
<v Speaker 2>literacy and a three year old, at the very minimum,

0:59:55.320 --> 0:59:57.520
<v Speaker 2>you should be able to read books that are on

0:59:57.680 --> 0:59:59.280
<v Speaker 2>his level, you know what I'm saying. So if it

0:59:59.320 --> 1:00:02.520
<v Speaker 2>means turning off the TV and engaging having conversation. We

1:00:02.600 --> 1:00:04.840
<v Speaker 2>realized with Dakota because he stayed with my dad a

1:00:04.880 --> 1:00:06.440
<v Speaker 2>lot during the day. My dad is just a man

1:00:06.520 --> 1:00:08.680
<v Speaker 2>of little words, so there was no reason for them

1:00:08.720 --> 1:00:11.120
<v Speaker 2>to talk and engage and have conversations, you know. So

1:00:11.240 --> 1:00:13.840
<v Speaker 2>the child's environment is very important. I don't know what

1:00:14.080 --> 1:00:16.880
<v Speaker 2>the mother's financial situation is like, but maybe if the

1:00:17.000 --> 1:00:19.360
<v Speaker 2>child can be put even in some sort of like

1:00:19.480 --> 1:00:23.000
<v Speaker 2>part time daycare program where he's around other children his age,

1:00:23.840 --> 1:00:26.840
<v Speaker 2>in a teaching environment where that's the structure, that may

1:00:26.920 --> 1:00:28.880
<v Speaker 2>be some of what he needs. Wear him out during

1:00:28.880 --> 1:00:31.080
<v Speaker 2>the day, so he's going to bed at seven eight

1:00:31.080 --> 1:00:33.040
<v Speaker 2>o'clock in the evening and getting twelve hours of sleep,

1:00:33.080 --> 1:00:36.000
<v Speaker 2>so he's not taking late naps, you know. To say

1:00:36.000 --> 1:00:37.960
<v Speaker 2>that people do it out of convenience, and I understand,

1:00:38.040 --> 1:00:39.960
<v Speaker 2>and financially you may not be in a position to

1:00:40.040 --> 1:00:42.480
<v Speaker 2>do it. But they do have programs depending on what

1:00:42.600 --> 1:00:44.680
<v Speaker 2>city you live in, where you can apply for, for example,

1:00:44.800 --> 1:00:48.200
<v Speaker 2>universal pre K and that's funded by the state or

1:00:48.240 --> 1:00:50.960
<v Speaker 2>by the government, so there's no need to be ashamed.

1:00:51.040 --> 1:00:52.880
<v Speaker 3>We were looking to go to Brooklyn Friends, which was

1:00:52.960 --> 1:00:55.120
<v Speaker 3>three thousand dollars a month, and me and K was like,

1:00:55.720 --> 1:00:56.440
<v Speaker 3>what this is?

1:00:56.800 --> 1:01:00.080
<v Speaker 1>This is honest. We were sitting in this thing. E

1:01:00.920 --> 1:01:01.680
<v Speaker 1>and K comes back.

1:01:01.680 --> 1:01:03.280
<v Speaker 3>It's like they sent back the tuition what it would

1:01:03.280 --> 1:01:06.040
<v Speaker 3>be and I was like three thousand dollars. I was like, okay,

1:01:06.080 --> 1:01:07.600
<v Speaker 3>we could divide that by ten. It's like he's three

1:01:07.680 --> 1:01:09.120
<v Speaker 3>hundred a month. And she's like no, no, no, no, no,

1:01:09.840 --> 1:01:12.560
<v Speaker 3>it's three thousand a month. And I asked the lady,

1:01:12.640 --> 1:01:15.600
<v Speaker 3>I said, what can you promise me? My four year

1:01:15.640 --> 1:01:17.800
<v Speaker 3>old is going to learn here for three thousand dollars

1:01:17.840 --> 1:01:21.400
<v Speaker 3>a month. Her response was, well, every child gets an iPad.

1:01:22.080 --> 1:01:24.680
<v Speaker 3>I said, I can buy him his own iPad. Thirty

1:01:24.720 --> 1:01:27.720
<v Speaker 3>thousand dollars UPK it is Me and Kay walked up

1:01:27.720 --> 1:01:29.200
<v Speaker 3>out of it at me and we really thank you

1:01:29.240 --> 1:01:30.240
<v Speaker 3>for your time, so much for you.

1:01:30.400 --> 1:01:32.680
<v Speaker 2>We got accepted, but he won't be going here because

1:01:32.720 --> 1:01:37.560
<v Speaker 2>what I know, it just simply requires basics, consistency and

1:01:37.680 --> 1:01:41.200
<v Speaker 2>structure and structure. So hopefully you can have the conversation

1:01:41.320 --> 1:01:43.760
<v Speaker 2>with your mom. I think if she entrusted you to

1:01:44.200 --> 1:01:47.760
<v Speaker 2>be his godmother and your cousin and your family, I

1:01:47.840 --> 1:01:50.200
<v Speaker 2>think the tact and the approach is all ways going

1:01:50.280 --> 1:01:52.240
<v Speaker 2>to be at the forefront of things on how you

1:01:52.320 --> 1:01:55.120
<v Speaker 2>approach her with just offering suggestions, maybe giving her this

1:01:55.240 --> 1:01:57.000
<v Speaker 2>is advice, like hey, would you ever think about putting

1:01:57.040 --> 1:01:59.240
<v Speaker 2>him in? And if you have the latitude, be like, hey,

1:01:59.280 --> 1:02:01.880
<v Speaker 2>I don't mind picking up some days or drop some morings.

1:02:02.240 --> 1:02:04.400
<v Speaker 2>You know what I'm saying, being that village for her,

1:02:04.560 --> 1:02:06.360
<v Speaker 2>if that's your genuine concern, because you know.

1:02:06.360 --> 1:02:09.080
<v Speaker 1>What's worse as a parent than trying to do your

1:02:09.120 --> 1:02:09.800
<v Speaker 1>best in someone.

1:02:11.000 --> 1:02:12.400
<v Speaker 3>The worst thing in trying to do your best and

1:02:12.480 --> 1:02:15.200
<v Speaker 3>failing is someone pointing out that you're not doing it well,

1:02:15.320 --> 1:02:16.720
<v Speaker 3>but also not offering any.

1:02:16.640 --> 1:02:19.240
<v Speaker 2>Any right, So if you really want to help or you.

1:02:19.400 --> 1:02:22.280
<v Speaker 1>Value and come prepared with the plan and say hey,

1:02:22.560 --> 1:02:24.960
<v Speaker 1>I see you doing everything. Can I add something?

1:02:25.560 --> 1:02:27.360
<v Speaker 3>And maybe that's the way where it don't get put

1:02:27.440 --> 1:02:29.200
<v Speaker 3>on the mom so she won't be offensive. You already

1:02:29.200 --> 1:02:32.160
<v Speaker 3>acknowledge that she's doing everything she can, so you, as

1:02:32.200 --> 1:02:33.000
<v Speaker 3>a godmother tried.

1:02:33.280 --> 1:02:35.280
<v Speaker 2>She might even be aware that there's a deficittion. She

1:02:35.400 --> 1:02:37.120
<v Speaker 2>might you know, and she might be like, damn, I

1:02:37.480 --> 1:02:39.040
<v Speaker 2>I'm in this by myself, and now she knows she

1:02:39.080 --> 1:02:40.360
<v Speaker 2>has something I think she.

1:02:40.480 --> 1:02:43.120
<v Speaker 4>Has to not lead with everything that she she she

1:02:43.240 --> 1:02:46.360
<v Speaker 4>outlined for us everything she she saw what's wrong wrong, right,

1:02:46.560 --> 1:02:47.400
<v Speaker 4>don't lead with that.

1:02:47.680 --> 1:02:47.800
<v Speaker 6>Right.

1:02:48.800 --> 1:02:51.920
<v Speaker 4>She has to position herself as like a free resource,

1:02:52.040 --> 1:02:55.120
<v Speaker 4>like she is the next step to help, even though

1:02:55.200 --> 1:02:59.520
<v Speaker 4>she's taking him to free programs at the library, intervention

1:02:59.680 --> 1:03:02.480
<v Speaker 4>thing or anything else like that. Whatever she can do that.

1:03:03.040 --> 1:03:05.520
<v Speaker 4>It doesn't require a legal guardian.

1:03:05.240 --> 1:03:06.600
<v Speaker 1>Or something like that for sure.

1:03:06.800 --> 1:03:08.520
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, I didn't think about that. They do have like

1:03:08.600 --> 1:03:11.360
<v Speaker 2>things that museums, free programs, the library. You can bring

1:03:11.400 --> 1:03:11.680
<v Speaker 2>the kids.

1:03:11.720 --> 1:03:15.360
<v Speaker 4>It probably just needs to interact with more kids his age. Yeah, yeah,

1:03:15.400 --> 1:03:19.440
<v Speaker 4>so that he really start talking more. Yes, because the

1:03:19.520 --> 1:03:23.040
<v Speaker 4>grandparents thing is not helpful whatsoever. That is actually like

1:03:23.680 --> 1:03:26.400
<v Speaker 4>a net negative when you think about it being grandparents

1:03:26.960 --> 1:03:27.400
<v Speaker 4>realize that.

1:03:27.840 --> 1:03:31.000
<v Speaker 1>Yeah, the dad is also sounds like that is a

1:03:31.080 --> 1:03:33.560
<v Speaker 1>little said. The dad can't doesn't read and write as well.

1:03:33.640 --> 1:03:36.280
<v Speaker 1>So it's just like the child's home environment isn't big

1:03:36.320 --> 1:03:39.040
<v Speaker 1>with literacy. Yeah, put him. Put that child in a

1:03:39.080 --> 1:03:42.240
<v Speaker 1>program where there's other people around, watch that child flow flourish.

1:03:42.800 --> 1:03:45.280
<v Speaker 3>That's a prototype was remember all of the kids that came,

1:03:46.080 --> 1:03:48.440
<v Speaker 3>we had an eighty average minimum.

1:03:48.680 --> 1:03:50.040
<v Speaker 1>You had to have an eighty average on to be

1:03:50.080 --> 1:03:53.600
<v Speaker 1>a part of prototype all of the parents. Yeah, my son,

1:03:53.720 --> 1:03:56.640
<v Speaker 1>I was sixty seven. I said, listen, you put him

1:03:56.640 --> 1:04:00.439
<v Speaker 1>amongst these kids where it's cool to be small. Watch

1:04:00.520 --> 1:04:00.880
<v Speaker 1>your son.

1:04:01.680 --> 1:04:04.160
<v Speaker 3>And we always did report card checks and them grades

1:04:04.240 --> 1:04:07.680
<v Speaker 3>always meet the standard because you'll be surprised how people

1:04:07.880 --> 1:04:09.920
<v Speaker 3>just they're in an environment where it's.

1:04:09.840 --> 1:04:10.720
<v Speaker 1>Cool to be stupid.

1:04:11.120 --> 1:04:13.600
<v Speaker 3>I'm gonna be stupid, but wait, it's cool to be smart.

1:04:14.080 --> 1:04:16.520
<v Speaker 3>I'm doing my homework because you don't want to be

1:04:16.560 --> 1:04:17.360
<v Speaker 3>the only one that don't.

1:04:17.360 --> 1:04:20.880
<v Speaker 4>Got an eighty average. That's a difference between all public schools.

1:04:21.080 --> 1:04:23.840
<v Speaker 4>Like you got an environment where the teachers don't care,

1:04:23.920 --> 1:04:27.080
<v Speaker 4>the students don't care, No one cares. Everyone's failing that

1:04:27.760 --> 1:04:29.880
<v Speaker 4>environment where teacher's care, the principal cares.

1:04:30.000 --> 1:04:30.680
<v Speaker 1>That is a fact.

1:04:31.280 --> 1:04:32.040
<v Speaker 4>Everyone cares.

1:04:32.120 --> 1:04:36.240
<v Speaker 1>So that's a fact. Good. I'm glad you point out

1:04:36.280 --> 1:04:38.400
<v Speaker 1>good public school start with principles.

1:04:38.880 --> 1:04:42.240
<v Speaker 3>Like shout out to Cody Keys visionaries in the sense

1:04:42.640 --> 1:04:45.720
<v Speaker 3>for sure, because the saw what that school needed at

1:04:45.720 --> 1:04:48.160
<v Speaker 3>a time where the graduation rate was low, and she

1:04:48.240 --> 1:04:50.840
<v Speaker 3>brought in all of those mentors to change it. Brought

1:04:50.880 --> 1:04:53.000
<v Speaker 3>in people and they went from having a D and

1:04:53.080 --> 1:04:55.600
<v Speaker 3>graduation rate to an a plus the morale.

1:05:00.000 --> 1:05:00.880
<v Speaker 5>It's small crack no.

1:05:04.080 --> 1:05:05.320
<v Speaker 1>No, shout out Dakota Keys.

1:05:05.360 --> 1:05:10.560
<v Speaker 2>If you say we love you, come Dakota. Dakota's son

1:05:10.600 --> 1:05:12.920
<v Speaker 2>and I went to nursery school together. That's how far

1:05:13.040 --> 1:05:13.400
<v Speaker 2>back we go.

1:05:13.640 --> 1:05:18.080
<v Speaker 1>Shout out Mateo Matteo, Dakota. Shout out the mentorship program

1:05:18.200 --> 1:05:18.920
<v Speaker 1>we did there.

1:05:18.840 --> 1:05:20.000
<v Speaker 5>To receive you.

1:05:20.480 --> 1:05:20.680
<v Speaker 1>Yeah.

1:05:21.320 --> 1:05:22.720
<v Speaker 2>All right, y'all. If you want to be featured as

1:05:22.720 --> 1:05:25.800
<v Speaker 2>a listener letter this season, email us at the Ellis

1:05:25.880 --> 1:05:27.480
<v Speaker 2>Advice at gmail dot com.

1:05:27.840 --> 1:05:29.960
<v Speaker 1>That's t H E E L L I S A

1:05:30.120 --> 1:05:32.400
<v Speaker 1>d V I C E at gmail dot com.

1:05:32.520 --> 1:05:34.960
<v Speaker 2>All right, moment of truth time. We're talking about prepping

1:05:35.000 --> 1:05:36.520
<v Speaker 2>for high school and all that good stuff. I know

1:05:36.600 --> 1:05:38.920
<v Speaker 2>mine is super easy. I'm going to need the support

1:05:39.000 --> 1:05:43.920
<v Speaker 2>group of a lifetime as I do this with Jackson,

1:05:44.800 --> 1:05:47.520
<v Speaker 2>four more years in this household. I look at the

1:05:47.600 --> 1:05:51.560
<v Speaker 2>lifespan of your average human and I'm realizing more and

1:05:51.640 --> 1:05:54.200
<v Speaker 2>more now that the time that each child has at

1:05:54.280 --> 1:05:57.200
<v Speaker 2>home with their parents before they move on to college

1:05:57.360 --> 1:06:01.360
<v Speaker 2>is a short part of life. Life, and as rich

1:06:01.400 --> 1:06:03.520
<v Speaker 2>as you can make the experience for them at home,

1:06:04.520 --> 1:06:06.480
<v Speaker 2>just I'm looking forward to spending more time with him,

1:06:06.840 --> 1:06:08.760
<v Speaker 2>you know, in these next four years doing more things

1:06:08.800 --> 1:06:11.080
<v Speaker 2>as a family together. Y'all are gonna have to pick

1:06:11.160 --> 1:06:13.120
<v Speaker 2>us all up off the floor when Jackson goes to college.

1:06:13.240 --> 1:06:15.920
<v Speaker 2>Cairo Caz, I don't know what that's gonna look like.

1:06:17.240 --> 1:06:20.280
<v Speaker 2>So so yeah, yeah, that's my thing, just prepping for

1:06:20.400 --> 1:06:24.120
<v Speaker 2>high school. We're gonna be a mess. Gonna be a mess.

1:06:24.680 --> 1:06:26.360
<v Speaker 2>Did I tell y'all real quick that When we were

1:06:26.400 --> 1:06:28.920
<v Speaker 2>in Mexico we talked about that. I mentioned it one day, like, damn, like,

1:06:29.000 --> 1:06:31.240
<v Speaker 2>we have like five more years until Jackson goes to college,

1:06:31.280 --> 1:06:33.440
<v Speaker 2>and that's gonna be so weird not having jacksone in

1:06:33.520 --> 1:06:36.240
<v Speaker 2>the house. And then literally, one by one, everybody, I

1:06:36.320 --> 1:06:42.920
<v Speaker 2>think Cairo started crying, cast started crying. We were at

1:06:43.040 --> 1:06:52.720
<v Speaker 2>Nickelodeon resort in Mexico, and it was so just like casual,

1:06:52.800 --> 1:06:54.640
<v Speaker 2>Like damn, I didn't It's gonna be so weird when

1:06:54.680 --> 1:06:56.480
<v Speaker 2>Jackson's not here in the household. And then I realized

1:06:56.520 --> 1:06:58.840
<v Speaker 2>what I was saying in Cairo's face, just instantly, just

1:06:59.400 --> 1:07:01.120
<v Speaker 2>and then one by one, so there were six of

1:07:01.200 --> 1:07:03.440
<v Speaker 2>us crying. The colder decides crying cause everybody crying, and

1:07:03.520 --> 1:07:05.160
<v Speaker 2>then the waiter comes back over and he was like

1:07:05.760 --> 1:07:07.840
<v Speaker 2>everything's okay. You don't like you know, like the pizza.

1:07:08.840 --> 1:07:14.080
<v Speaker 6>Fine, Yes, imagine if everybody started crying because the pizza

1:07:14.200 --> 1:07:14.760
<v Speaker 6>was discussed.

1:07:20.280 --> 1:07:25.240
<v Speaker 2>I knew we should have went to Italy. This is

1:07:25.320 --> 1:07:27.920
<v Speaker 2>American cheese. I know where you got this from? America?

1:07:28.880 --> 1:07:29.360
<v Speaker 2>What's yours?

1:07:29.440 --> 1:07:29.640
<v Speaker 1>Baby?

1:07:29.680 --> 1:07:29.960
<v Speaker 2>Got one?

1:07:30.960 --> 1:07:34.920
<v Speaker 3>Make sure you instill your child with the amount of

1:07:35.000 --> 1:07:37.680
<v Speaker 3>confidence that makes them unyielding when it comes to pressure.

1:07:39.040 --> 1:07:39.720
<v Speaker 4>They say it again.

1:07:40.680 --> 1:07:43.480
<v Speaker 3>I want instill your child with the type of confidence

1:07:43.520 --> 1:07:45.960
<v Speaker 3>that makes them unyielding when it comes to pressure. Yes,

1:07:46.160 --> 1:07:49.040
<v Speaker 3>because peer pressure is the biggest thing in high school,

1:07:49.040 --> 1:07:53.640
<v Speaker 3>whether it's drugs, sex, alcohol, driving, sports. Make sure that

1:07:53.760 --> 1:07:56.040
<v Speaker 3>your child is so confident that they can stand ten

1:07:56.080 --> 1:07:58.200
<v Speaker 3>toes down and say I'm not really rocking with them,

1:07:58.720 --> 1:08:01.840
<v Speaker 3>and they will never let them morals be in question

1:08:01.960 --> 1:08:03.480
<v Speaker 3>because they want to fit in that.

1:08:03.800 --> 1:08:04.600
<v Speaker 1>That's my biggest thing.

1:08:05.040 --> 1:08:08.000
<v Speaker 4>One after that that, that's it right there, that's great. Yeah,

1:08:08.080 --> 1:08:10.320
<v Speaker 4>Mine is make sure your kids stay ten toes down

1:08:12.240 --> 1:08:14.360
<v Speaker 4>to let people know they ain't rocking with them and

1:08:14.440 --> 1:08:18.439
<v Speaker 4>their leaders in their little community. Now, this this, this

1:08:18.560 --> 1:08:23.280
<v Speaker 4>topic was great as we discussed. Now we're preparing Victoria

1:08:23.439 --> 1:08:27.600
<v Speaker 4>for uh junior high school. She's answering in September, and

1:08:28.040 --> 1:08:30.800
<v Speaker 4>I think everything that we just discussed is applical for

1:08:31.160 --> 1:08:33.599
<v Speaker 4>for that as well. It doesn't change a single thing.

1:08:33.640 --> 1:08:36.000
<v Speaker 4>If anything, it's a head start, you know.

1:08:37.160 --> 1:08:38.120
<v Speaker 2>Being an active parent.

1:08:38.320 --> 1:08:40.519
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, I'm I'm super nervous about her going to junior

1:08:40.560 --> 1:08:42.720
<v Speaker 4>high school like I thought she was eight.

1:08:43.720 --> 1:08:43.880
<v Speaker 1>Nah.

1:08:47.160 --> 1:08:52.680
<v Speaker 4>Yeah, So even like discussing you know, peer pressure and

1:08:52.800 --> 1:08:57.960
<v Speaker 4>friends and drugs and sex and other outside influences scare

1:08:58.200 --> 1:09:00.479
<v Speaker 4>the living mess out of me. But what one thing

1:09:00.560 --> 1:09:03.760
<v Speaker 4>this conversation did let me know is that we're doing

1:09:04.000 --> 1:09:07.320
<v Speaker 4>what we need to do to make sure that she's prepared,

1:09:07.840 --> 1:09:11.080
<v Speaker 4>and also preparing ourselves for what may come, because there's

1:09:11.120 --> 1:09:15.040
<v Speaker 4>never really any anything that you can over prepare for.

1:09:16.000 --> 1:09:17.880
<v Speaker 4>Life comes at you, and it comes at you fast.

1:09:18.400 --> 1:09:22.479
<v Speaker 4>But yeah, just making sure that your kid stands ten

1:09:22.560 --> 1:09:29.599
<v Speaker 4>toes down, it's probably my moment of truth trips.

1:09:30.520 --> 1:09:35.280
<v Speaker 6>I would say freshman year is the foundational time for

1:09:35.439 --> 1:09:37.479
<v Speaker 6>high school. The most important thing that I learned in

1:09:37.560 --> 1:09:41.480
<v Speaker 6>high school is that colleges start to count your academics

1:09:41.560 --> 1:09:44.960
<v Speaker 6>and your after school stuff in your sophomore year. That's

1:09:44.960 --> 1:09:47.920
<v Speaker 6>when your grades start to count towards your GPA for college.

1:09:48.160 --> 1:09:50.040
<v Speaker 5>So freshman year, you learn.

1:09:50.080 --> 1:09:52.960
<v Speaker 6>How to get the work done, you learn how to schedule,

1:09:53.080 --> 1:09:55.439
<v Speaker 6>you learn how to navigate high school.

1:09:56.520 --> 1:09:59.720
<v Speaker 5>So let that be let freshman year be your foundation's

1:10:00.160 --> 1:10:00.519
<v Speaker 5>I like that.

1:10:00.680 --> 1:10:03.280
<v Speaker 2>Ease them into it, all right, y'all. If you have

1:10:03.400 --> 1:10:05.800
<v Speaker 2>not been following us yet on Patreon, be sure to

1:10:05.960 --> 1:10:09.479
<v Speaker 2>find us, subscribe and join the party. That's the after party,

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<v Speaker 2>as well as exclusive Ellis family content. You can find

1:10:13.240 --> 1:10:16.080
<v Speaker 2>us on social media across the board at ellsver After,

1:10:16.160 --> 1:10:18.320
<v Speaker 2>and you can find me at Kadeen I am, and.

1:10:18.439 --> 1:10:22.720
<v Speaker 4>I am Davao ellisphoto dot com, and I'm Joshua Underscore Dwayne, and.

1:10:22.800 --> 1:10:26.439
<v Speaker 6>I'm at Tribs The Cool Tribbz the Cool on Everything.

1:10:26.720 --> 1:10:28.840
<v Speaker 3>And if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, be sure to

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<v Speaker 3>rate reviews, subscribe and download.

1:10:31.600 --> 1:10:33.479
<v Speaker 2>That's right, baby, dead ass.

1:10:35.280 --> 1:10:40.920
<v Speaker 6>Got ellsver After is an iHeartMedia podcast. It's hosted by

1:10:41.120 --> 1:10:45.920
<v Speaker 6>Kadeen and Deval Ellis. It's produced by Triple Video, production

1:10:46.120 --> 1:10:50.920
<v Speaker 6>by Joshua Dwaane and Matthew Ellis, video editing by Lashan Rothe.

1:12:03.240 --> 1:12:04.360
<v Speaker 1>In its