Speaker 1: Calm Down with Aaron and Chrissa is a production of
Speaker 1: I Heart Radio. Guess Who's back back again? That kicks
Speaker 1: up at it not good. We thought the return of
Speaker 1: Tom Brady going to Foxborough was a big deal. How
Speaker 1: about this gal coming back? She's alive, Arrissa the return
Speaker 1: the bandages are still intact. Hey, look if there was
Speaker 1: If I was ever gonna be wally pipped by anyone,
Speaker 1: it would be Melissa Stark. So I was willing to
Speaker 1: give up the chair to Melissa. I'm just sad that
Speaker 1: I wasn't part of the conversation. We like her. I
Speaker 1: told her we have to have her back on. When
Speaker 1: you are breathing and doing well, start, as we like
Speaker 1: to say on our phone calls, start from the beginning.
Speaker 1: Well you you were there at the beginning, You were
Speaker 1: there was you left me? At about eight thirty at
Speaker 1: night on a Saturday, we had a fox get together
Speaker 1: that was lovely, by the way, lovely this is the
Speaker 1: police report. Leaves dinner at eight thirty and after that
Speaker 1: it's all downhill. So we go to an incredible dinner
Speaker 1: by our boss puts on this you know, very very
Speaker 1: like just I don't know, top notch um thing for
Speaker 1: all of us, all class, um, first class. Usually I'm
Speaker 1: in coach, but um, because you guys were in town
Speaker 1: doing the Rams Bucks game. So it's a school night again.
Speaker 1: As we all know, sometimes we abide by the rules,
Speaker 1: sometimes we don't. In this particular case, I did. Was
Speaker 1: in bed by thirty, awoken at twelve o'clock with terrible
Speaker 1: stomach pains. I thought to myself, this doesn't feel too
Speaker 1: good throwing what. I didn't feel like, what do you
Speaker 1: feel like like you're gonna puke? What were these stomach pains?
Speaker 1: It was like cramps. It was like lady cramps, and
Speaker 1: you're like, yeah, yeah, said lady cramps. Well, I mean
Speaker 1: you look at me being so refined. Um, it was awful.
Speaker 1: And I was like, well, this hurts real bad. And
Speaker 1: then the onset of throwing up happens no more than
Speaker 1: twenty minutes after the fact. And then I proceed to
Speaker 1: throw up every hour, but throughout the hour until I'm
Speaker 1: checking my phone because I have to be at Fox.
Speaker 1: I have to leave my house at five am to
Speaker 1: beat a Fox by five thirty to start, you know,
Speaker 1: hair and makeup, et cetera for Sunday. So are you
Speaker 1: thinking food poisoning. At this point, where are you thinking, Yes,
Speaker 1: that's exactly what I'm because you know, we've all had
Speaker 1: food poisoning and it comes on out of nowhere and
Speaker 1: it's very erratic and you're like this, I'm gonna die.
Speaker 1: So each hour, I'm checking my phone and I'm like,
Speaker 1: if I can just get through another hour, like, if
Speaker 1: I could just get through another hour, like, then I
Speaker 1: can make it to work. Finally, four o'clock rolls around
Speaker 1: and I'm like, this ain't good. This is not good.
Speaker 1: I call Spoon, my producer, and I say, Spoon, I
Speaker 1: think I have food poisoning. If you can get me
Speaker 1: an I V to work, because at this point, I've
Speaker 1: googled ivy s to come to my house. None are available,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, if you can get me an ivy
Speaker 1: to work, then I can come in. And he's like okay.
Speaker 1: It's like I'll have a p A come pick you up.
Speaker 1: As someone who's been a p A, the last thing
Speaker 1: you want to do is go pick up someone that's
Speaker 1: having food poisoning. What she thinks is food poisoning. I'm like, no,
Speaker 1: no p A is picking me up. I'll get myself
Speaker 1: to work, I get in the shower. E I laid
Speaker 1: down in the shower and I was like, I can't
Speaker 1: get up. And I have a very high tolerance for pain.
Speaker 1: And so the fact that I was like I couldn't,
Speaker 1: I called nine one. I thought, So, this is what
Speaker 1: I'm so impressed with you as one of my girlfriends,
Speaker 1: is that I know you do. I know you have
Speaker 1: a high tolerance level of pain. I know that you
Speaker 1: will go to work if you're bleeding out. I I
Speaker 1: just I know that about you. If somebody that's had
Speaker 1: surgery and then started on the sideline, I just do
Speaker 1: those things. I know you're like that calling an ambulance
Speaker 1: and I've had to call an ambulance a couple of
Speaker 1: times for my husband. UM, what, it's awful. What is
Speaker 1: your mindset when you're doing this? Like, I know you
Speaker 1: had to be in pain. Yeah, it was. I have
Speaker 1: no other choice because Kyle was in Nashville, so I
Speaker 1: was by myself, and I'm like, you can sit here
Speaker 1: and continue to like, you know, feel this way, or
Speaker 1: you just have to go. And then I was even thinking,
Speaker 1: I was like, if I get to the hospital now
Speaker 1: and I get checked out, we aren't on air. Until
Speaker 1: eight o'clock. I can still make the show. I'm not
Speaker 1: getting the sooner. I get to to the hospital, the quicker,
Speaker 1: I can get an ivy, the quicker, I can get
Speaker 1: back to work. I'm like, I got this, so I called.
Speaker 1: I called the ambulance. And at this point then I'm like,
Speaker 1: I throw a phone charg I'm like, this is what
Speaker 1: I'm thinking. I throw a phone charger. I throw my notes,
Speaker 1: my my football notes into my person. I'm not kidding,
Speaker 1: because I was like, if I have to go straight
Speaker 1: from there, and then I have my notes, I got
Speaker 1: my phone charger and my house keys, and so I'm
Speaker 1: laying at the front door with my stuff and just
Speaker 1: like rocking back and forth. And then I see the
Speaker 1: lights through my gate of the ambulance and it's on
Speaker 1: my security footage. I'll get it for you, because who
Speaker 1: doesn't love a visual aid in this particularly an aid
Speaker 1: car um And the lights are on, so I can
Speaker 1: I go through my gate? And then I'm like laying
Speaker 1: on the grass in front of my house and You're
Speaker 1: asking you all these questions are like are you using
Speaker 1: the creational drugs? And I'm like, oh my god, no.
Speaker 1: They were convinced, right they convinced, they were convinced you
Speaker 1: o'deine completely, and they're like giving you like the whole interrogation.
Speaker 1: I'm like, sir, I swear I have like I had
Speaker 1: three glasses of wine. This is it. I've got to go, like,
Speaker 1: I gotta get to the hospital so I can get
Speaker 1: back to work. Sho king Still, I am still poking.
Speaker 1: I'm like, now I'm like free for ramate. Anyways, So
Speaker 1: I get into the ambulance and it is at this point,
Speaker 1: now it is game on. We are you know, there's
Speaker 1: no going back. Get to the hospital. It's terrible, needless
Speaker 1: to say. I wasn't able to go to work. Thank
Speaker 1: God are incredible bosses at Fox sent Vicky Trilling, our
Speaker 1: friend and stylists who came into the hospital. She helped
Speaker 1: me like a patient advocate, get me pain medication, expediting
Speaker 1: the story. They sent me home. I did a CT scan.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna interrupt. I get a call. I get text
Speaker 1: messages about seven o'clock that people don't know where you
Speaker 1: are yourself. I'm like, what did she Because my background,
Speaker 1: my background could support this could have been self inflicted.
Speaker 1: Chrissa maybe made a few bad decisions like, you know,
Speaker 1: but I knew you had been dropped off, so I
Speaker 1: was like, unless she got up and went back or
Speaker 1: went somewhere else, I'm like, she's fine. So then I
Speaker 1: start making some calls, right and I, you know, my
Speaker 1: husband's so in bad it's early because I've got to
Speaker 1: get to so far and like something's wrong. And then
Speaker 1: Kyle texted me and said he knew what hospital you
Speaker 1: were in. So I then found out that Victoria Trilling
Speaker 1: was with you. I text her. She calls me and
Speaker 1: I'm thinking, oh my god, you have food poisoning. The
Speaker 1: entire group of Fox, the pregame, the game crew is
Speaker 1: all gonna be barfing. We're all going to be going
Speaker 1: to we're all at the dinner together. I thought, which
Speaker 1: everybody was making fun of me on my crew, was
Speaker 1: Troy is gonna be so pissed. And they're like, Chriss
Speaker 1: is in the hospital and You're thinking that Troyes would
Speaker 1: be pissed. I'm like, I just started thinking when I'm
Speaker 1: going to start puking? When is Troy going to start puking?
Speaker 1: So I called Vicky, who's in the hospital with you,
Speaker 1: and you are screaming in the background, like I don't know,
Speaker 1: and I don't know you're on the phone at this
Speaker 1: point because I'm like popped up on morphine, thank God,
Speaker 1: to try to like, you know, mitigate this pain. But yes, okay, anyways,
Speaker 1: but you are in that much pain that you were
Speaker 1: screaming and I guess you were shaking and sweating. And Jared,
Speaker 1: who was sitting next to me, was like, that's not
Speaker 1: food poisoning, and I was like, oh my god, her appendix.
Speaker 1: She has kidney stones. I get to the game and yes,
Speaker 1: we got word. You got released. Well you should be okay,
Speaker 1: you should be the doctor then, because you said, well,
Speaker 1: well you said appendix before this doctor did this doctor
Speaker 1: was like we don't see anything on the CT scan.
Speaker 1: Head home, and so I get home. I didn't want
Speaker 1: to go home, right, I didn't. I was like, this
Speaker 1: is this is not okay. But if the doctor is
Speaker 1: telling you, look, I'm not a doctor. I'll play one
Speaker 1: on TV, but I'm not. So if the doctor saying
Speaker 1: go home, I'm gonna go home. But then I'm home
Speaker 1: and I'm like, no, no, this isn't right. Something's really
Speaker 1: not right. So I'm crawling and again I'm traumatic about
Speaker 1: some things. But not about this. You can about some
Speaker 1: things Rose, but not about Titanic. So I'm crawling on
Speaker 1: the floor and Vicky was like, get in the car.
Speaker 1: And so I go back to the hospital and I
Speaker 1: do another CT. Okay, yes, yeah, and I did. Didn't
Speaker 1: hit you right away when you got home again, because
Speaker 1: at this point the pain medications weren't off. You know
Speaker 1: that pain medication at the hospital is very different than
Speaker 1: the over the counter. Um is it under lock and
Speaker 1: key with the tide pods. And so I am back
Speaker 1: in the hospital another CT scan. Thank god, this doctor
Speaker 1: was so great. She was like, there's something wrong. We
Speaker 1: have to operate. I'm so out of it and I'm
Speaker 1: like this, and she's like, can you sign here if
Speaker 1: we open If we open you up, you might have
Speaker 1: to have a colostomy bag. I think I'm saying it right, colostomy.
Speaker 1: Either way, I'm gonna be carrying around my ship, you
Speaker 1: know what I mean. And I already have a lot
Speaker 1: of it. So I'm like this, that's a big bag exactly.
Speaker 1: In fact, it's so big we call luggage. Um. So
Speaker 1: I signed this boy signed the form and I'm like
Speaker 1: at this one, I don't care. Just take it. Out.
Speaker 1: So I go in get operated on. The doctor discovers
Speaker 1: my small intestine has been wrapped around my appendix for
Speaker 1: some time now, created all this scar tissue and they
Speaker 1: had to remove my appendix, and it was, you know, whatever,
Speaker 1: I look, I'm not the first person of the last
Speaker 1: person how this happened to me. But ladies and gentlemen,
Speaker 1: everyone's like, well, how did you did? Like what are
Speaker 1: the warning signs are? Why does this happen? There was
Speaker 1: no warning signs and they don't know how it happened.
Speaker 1: So here we are now. I have some cuts on
Speaker 1: my stomach, but I didn't know this about you. You
Speaker 1: also have had your appendix out. Another thing we have
Speaker 1: in common. I have had my appendix out, unlike yours,
Speaker 1: it was not because of appendicitis. I ended up getting
Speaker 1: a really really bad like flu slash bacterial infection and
Speaker 1: they were like, it's her appendix. They took him out,
Speaker 1: and then afterwards they were like, it wasn't her appendix.
Speaker 1: Oh shit? Yeah great? Um, it was Christmas time, super
Speaker 1: annoying and sad and frustrating, but whatever. Everybody's fine. You
Speaker 1: were in second grade in second grade. My friend was
Speaker 1: so much worse because you were, and I knew you
Speaker 1: were out of it for quite some time. But um,
Speaker 1: I think when we come back, I'm gonna tell my version.
Speaker 1: I get to the game, I get out of the game.
Speaker 1: It's a whole situation for me. And I'm like, what
Speaker 1: is happening? Yes, I can't wait for this alright, Fox
Speaker 1: nine one one coming up next we are recapping Carissa,
Speaker 1: And uh, how long ago does that seem? Because I
Speaker 1: was thinking yesterday when you were back in studio, like
Speaker 1: it's been a week since this drama happened, but it
Speaker 1: feels like three weeks or four weeks. And again I
Speaker 1: say this like you know, when people get sick or
Speaker 1: something happens in the open, it's like so dramatically, like, Okay,
Speaker 1: get on with it. It's just an appendix. I mean,
Speaker 1: it's not the biggest deal in the world. The comedy
Speaker 1: that ensued was because we were all together the night
Speaker 1: before and then we're all supposed to be working the
Speaker 1: next day, so that's this just happens on a Tuesday.
Speaker 1: It's not as big of a deal. But you know,
Speaker 1: it was a week ago yesterday that I had the surgery.
Speaker 1: But thank god I've lived to tell about it, but
Speaker 1: I don't know you. I don't know your side of it.
Speaker 1: You were the talk. I mean, forget Bradies in l
Speaker 1: A to take on the Rams, I mean, you were
Speaker 1: the talk. So we get to so far you've been discharged,
Speaker 1: and I'm hearing that you're discharged. I think you have
Speaker 1: a bacterial infection. You know, Troy's asking, Joe's asking, my producer,
Speaker 1: my director, Russo Richie zions. Everybody's concerned. What happened to Chrissa.
Speaker 1: You missed the show, which is a big deal in
Speaker 1: your eyes. In my eyes, like I want to go
Speaker 1: as you're getting like rolled into surgery or yeah, like
Speaker 1: before I talked to you before you go into surgery,
Speaker 1: or maybe before you come out. You're texting me and
Speaker 1: you're like, I'm so pissed I missed the show. Yeah,
Speaker 1: it was after. It was after because i'd come and
Speaker 1: then we were talking and I was so out of it.
Speaker 1: I was in the hospital bed and that's what That's
Speaker 1: what I remember talking to, unless it was before, But
Speaker 1: what do I know? So you're setting ready for this,
Speaker 1: like what's gonna be probably a preview of the NFC
Speaker 1: Championship game. Maybe thought until both teams you know, crap
Speaker 1: the bed literally. Um So I get out of the
Speaker 1: game and I call, like start making calls to see
Speaker 1: where you are, how you're feeling. You know, are you
Speaker 1: laying low? What do you think that you know the
Speaker 1: bucks got killed? Did you lose any money on your bets?
Speaker 1: You didn't even get your bets in Sunday. That's that's
Speaker 1: missing the show and not getting my bets in. That's
Speaker 1: why I doubled down yesterday and I made some Monday.
Speaker 1: Another great part of this whole story, there's lots of
Speaker 1: little things now we can laugh about it. We had
Speaker 1: told our girlfriend Jackie Quick, who you two have developed
Speaker 1: this bond over betting. That text chain is called fox bet,
Speaker 1: which you named it sure is. We had told her
Speaker 1: about this dinner we were going to and how fantastic
Speaker 1: it was going to be, and you know all the things.
Speaker 1: She texted us because she noticed you hadn't put your
Speaker 1: bets in and she said, you got what a Chrissa?
Speaker 1: Did you die? Where are your bets? Like someone for
Speaker 1: sure died last night? And I had to side text
Speaker 1: or really quick. As I'm putting on my outfit for
Speaker 1: the game, I'm like, Chris is currently in the hospital puking.
Speaker 1: She had an ambulance. I was like, it has nothing
Speaker 1: to do with her behavior. Something internally is wrong. So
Speaker 1: I leave the Bucks Rams game and I make a
Speaker 1: call to our friend Victoria, and I just said, hey,
Speaker 1: how we're doing. She's like, we're back in the a R.
Speaker 1: I'm like, what, We're back in the ear again. You're screaming.
Speaker 1: You're a mess. She said, you were shaking, you were sweating.
Speaker 1: You ended up getting a tube up your nose, down
Speaker 1: your throat, into your stomach with no painkillers. Right, Imagine
Speaker 1: a COVID test, you know, the early on COVID test
Speaker 1: that we're all up in bed. Imagine that. But it
Speaker 1: was a tube, this thick that went all the way
Speaker 1: up and has to come down your throat. Give me
Speaker 1: the surgery any day. This was terrible, And the best
Speaker 1: part about it is they were like, this could be
Speaker 1: in for a while, and I'm like, a while. Just
Speaker 1: give me a tracheotomy and get on with it. I
Speaker 1: don't have time for my god. So I end up
Speaker 1: watching Packers, Sporty Niners and Great. So I'm texting between
Speaker 1: your husband our girlfriend. You go into surgery about the
Speaker 1: time I go to bed, I have to leave for Miami.
Speaker 1: The next morning, I wake up, I get a long
Speaker 1: text from Kyle. They did exploratory surgery. You had your
Speaker 1: panics taken out, all the things. Delay, get on with it.
Speaker 1: So I finally you're you come to I don't know
Speaker 1: when I started texting you, but oh, you're texting me
Speaker 1: in the morning. You're like, hey, babe, I'm just coming to. Like,
Speaker 1: I'm alone by myself in this room because no one
Speaker 1: could be there. At seven o'clock, I woke up, I
Speaker 1: looked around in the best part. The nurse comes in
Speaker 1: and she goes, it looks like you're doing a lot
Speaker 1: better than last night. I go, why what happened last night?
Speaker 1: Like what was I doing? And she goes, you kept
Speaker 1: saying that you had to get back for an interview. Oh,
Speaker 1: I mean, who knows what I was talking about. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I was very concerned. You know. God, well you're out.
Speaker 1: Thank God you got that too. What was that like
Speaker 1: when they took that out? How is that? I mean,
Speaker 1: it was like I won the lottery. It was just
Speaker 1: the greatest feeling in the world. But yeah, aside from
Speaker 1: the dramatic storytelling and reenactment of it, all, I am
Speaker 1: so thankful that that second doctor was smart enough to
Speaker 1: be like, hey, something's not right here, let's open her
Speaker 1: up and figure it out. So I'm thanking that as
Speaker 1: you know, when you and I paid attention and care
Speaker 1: a lot about our health and we work out and
Speaker 1: we try to eat right and all that kind of stuff.
Speaker 1: But man, you don't know, and I could happen out
Speaker 1: of nowhere. So I'm just very appreciative and I'm so thankful.
Speaker 1: Without going on like, I'm like, I just want an oscar,
Speaker 1: and I'd like to thank Fox Sports, and I'd like
Speaker 1: to thank everyone who got me here today, to Aaron,
Speaker 1: to Victoria, But no, I am you. You know, in
Speaker 1: times of crisis, you see like who shows up, And
Speaker 1: I'm very appreciative for that. But yeah, I mean I
Speaker 1: just sat. I missed Melissa Stark. I know she was lovely. God,
Speaker 1: she looks great. I looks like how she was amazing,
Speaker 1: she was classy, she was just fantastic. But yeah, so
Speaker 1: you went back yesterday. How do you feel I was
Speaker 1: worried about you standing up during your show? But sweet,
Speaker 1: just so you like you guys all know, I mean,
Speaker 1: Aaron is the Aaron such a great friend, but especially
Speaker 1: in crisis, and she's like always checking before the show.
Speaker 1: She's like, you're gonna be great, you know, welcome back,
Speaker 1: the whole thing, and so sweet and so supportive. It
Speaker 1: was just nice to be back. And I had missed
Speaker 1: two weeks last year because of COVID, and that's a
Speaker 1: different kind of being gone, because of everything that was
Speaker 1: happening with that. This I was just so happy to
Speaker 1: be there. I didn't care if I had to lay
Speaker 1: on the ground, um, although I kept having to unbutton
Speaker 1: my pants because the cuts are right where the and
Speaker 1: you know, those microphone packs are so massive on the
Speaker 1: back by the time you put the pants on. So so,
Speaker 1: I mean, Charles Woodson is probably like, what is this
Speaker 1: operation you guys have here? I'm like laying there with
Speaker 1: my pants like half undone, Like they're like our boss
Speaker 1: are coming in making sure I'm okay, and I'm like, fine,
Speaker 1: my pants are just undone. We're good here. But they
Speaker 1: were just awesome and it was nice to be back.
Speaker 1: So and you had a Sunday off, which of course
Speaker 1: is rare for you. So we were texting and I
Speaker 1: was close to coming in and sitting with you all day.
Speaker 1: I really was. I thought about it. I really was.
Speaker 1: I loved it. We were facetiming after the show and
Speaker 1: you were in your jammies, and then we proceeded to
Speaker 1: talk the rest of the day for Brady Belichick reunion.
Speaker 1: You and I were pumped about this all week long.
Speaker 1: It was a great distraction and it culminated and last
Speaker 1: night again a little anticlimactic. I was really hoping for
Speaker 1: my gambling purposes that they won by at last to score,
Speaker 1: but that was too intense. I told you my last
Speaker 1: text you was like, I need some wine and I
Speaker 1: hadn't been drinking yet since the surgery. I know, did
Speaker 1: you get a drink after? Oh? Yeah, now I'm back, Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: um yeah, I haven't really looked to see what people
Speaker 1: are saying today about it. I know it wasn't like
Speaker 1: the scoring and all the things like I feel like
Speaker 1: everybody wanted. But it wasn't for the Rams game either.
Speaker 1: But yeah, no, it was super stressful. Um I was.
Speaker 1: I loved all the build up. I thought he was
Speaker 1: so sweet at the end. I to be very honest
Speaker 1: with you, I was shocked how long he stood there
Speaker 1: with Michelle Tafoya. I thought that was very gracious and
Speaker 1: very lovely of him. I loved at the end where
Speaker 1: he just thanked the fans and said it was a
Speaker 1: great and I just thought that was so fabulous out
Speaker 1: of him. It's, um, he's easy to root for. People
Speaker 1: hate him though, well, but people always hate people that
Speaker 1: are on top, right because you want to knock off.
Speaker 1: It's the same look that that's a that's a good
Speaker 1: position to be hated in. It is because you're that
Speaker 1: good and you're the envy of many. But you can't
Speaker 1: knock his character. I know you know him very very well. Um,
Speaker 1: but I was just happy to see the wind no
Speaker 1: matter how it had to come, because you know, it's
Speaker 1: just like the final chapter. It is kind of sad
Speaker 1: to think though he made ever go back there as
Speaker 1: a player, of course. I mean, I gotta be honest,
Speaker 1: we're done with this guy is done for a while.
Speaker 1: I really don't. I mean, their defense needs to come
Speaker 1: together a little bit obviously, Like I think Gronk was
Speaker 1: a big missing piece last night. Huge. Yeah, but see
Speaker 1: they come back and win again. This guy is not
Speaker 1: going to go and retire again. He's just not. I
Speaker 1: don't know, I I get it that this doesn't happen,
Speaker 1: when could he possibly go back there? They're not going
Speaker 1: to schedule it every year, right, No, I know. I
Speaker 1: mean that's all, you know, the scheduling or whatever. I
Speaker 1: don't I don't know how like that. But I mean,
Speaker 1: even if it's let's just say it doesn't happen in
Speaker 1: the next two years or three year, I could see
Speaker 1: him con ask me last night how long I think
Speaker 1: he's going to play again? What then? I know, but
Speaker 1: I'd say if he's forty four now, like I'm gonna
Speaker 1: take the over under I'm gonna say under three years.
Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know whatever that's like. I don't know.
Speaker 1: I don't know. When things started getting a little frustrating
Speaker 1: last night for him, I was thinking, good, this is
Speaker 1: the time where you're like, am I going to keep
Speaker 1: doing this? I'm gonna keep Ben Roethlisberger is thinking that
Speaker 1: right now. Oh my god, I know. I love Ben
Speaker 1: to Um wait, I got a really really funny d M.
Speaker 1: It kind of has to do with you to the
Speaker 1: Calm Down podcast. Shoot, where is it? I got to
Speaker 1: read it? So you taught me a big lesson this
Speaker 1: week and stay true to your health, like to the bathroom.
Speaker 1: That's just the reality. I mean, let's just say what
Speaker 1: it is. So Aaron used to do this endorsement for
Speaker 1: True Biotic, and she had an advertisement. She looked so cute,
Speaker 1: she was like running and then she'd hold up the
Speaker 1: probiotic in her hand and then she'd say say true
Speaker 1: to your health, and she'd fling the vitamins back of
Speaker 1: the probiotic back. One time I was over at her
Speaker 1: house and I was like, you know what, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: try this and in true I'm gonna speak about myself
Speaker 1: in the third person, Charissa fashion. I did double the
Speaker 1: recommended dose and couldn't get on the will for the
Speaker 1: next week. And let's just say it worked. When anyone
Speaker 1: that's had surgery knows you ain't go into the bathroom
Speaker 1: for a while. And we're going here and and I
Speaker 1: never talked about bathroom stuff because I think it's disgusting.
Speaker 1: I think it's like you we don't even share the
Speaker 1: same bathroom, Like I am ready in the master bathroom
Speaker 1: and then he uses a different bathroom. I don't let
Speaker 1: him get ready in my bathroom, none of that, because
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't I don't want to walk in
Speaker 1: and I don't want to deal with no. Okay, privacy
Speaker 1: is important in some aspect. I'm not into the bathroom thing.
Speaker 1: I mean we acknowledge, you know, like I need to
Speaker 1: use the restroom. It happens, but we're not speaking about
Speaker 1: it at all. Yesterday and I text you this is
Speaker 1: an ongoing text all the schools. You're anesthesia. You don't
Speaker 1: go to the bathroom for probably four or five, six
Speaker 1: seven days after anesthesia. It just messes you up. Not
Speaker 1: to mention, Chrissa, you had surgery on your intestines, so
Speaker 1: you're you're already fun at that point. Seriously. And so
Speaker 1: I have gotten onto the bathroom, and anyone that hasn't
Speaker 1: gone to the bathroom, you know, it hurts. It's likely
Speaker 1: that just messes up your day. It's like, come on,
Speaker 1: you know, I don't want dressed about that, you know.
Speaker 1: And so it's been this whole thing of like have
Speaker 1: we gone yet? Have we gone yet? And so yesterday
Speaker 1: where I tied outfit on Sunday, pressure, the pressure of
Speaker 1: a name. So I come home yesterday and I'm like, oh, oh,
Speaker 1: it's the scene in also had been pounding meta musil
Speaker 1: like like coffee, anything that would work this thing for
Speaker 1: now still, if you're still if you're still with us
Speaker 1: the scene in Bridesmaids, or you're really doing it, really
Speaker 1: doing it in the street. I had that feeling. I
Speaker 1: walked in the door yesterday after work. I go, coll,
Speaker 1: that's good to see you. And I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna be right back, and I ran upstairs and it
Speaker 1: was a minute. I never in my life would think
Speaker 1: that I'd want to invite my husband in to the bathroom,
Speaker 1: but it was. I was so proud of the feet
Speaker 1: that had happened. I didn't if being downstairs in super
Speaker 1: tight leggings and a middrift Whitney Houston shirt. And I
Speaker 1: sent you and Jackie a picture and I said, look
Speaker 1: who gets to wear a middrift again, which at this
Speaker 1: age we shouldn't be wearing it anyways. But I was
Speaker 1: so excited that I went to the bathroom and I
Speaker 1: was like, Kyle, I almost invited you, and he was like,
Speaker 1: what the fuck? Anyways? All is clear, ready for takeoff? Clear? Clear?
Speaker 1: So what's I? I am a clear member, God, I'm
Speaker 1: everything yours clear. I could fly the plane at this point. Um,
Speaker 1: I so you know we've covered number two. Now cover
Speaker 1: cover deeper one so um one on one man to man.
Speaker 1: I will hold my tinkle all game long. It'll be
Speaker 1: six to seven hours since I pee during a game.
Speaker 1: I don't go during a game because I always feel bad.
Speaker 1: What it happens if somebody's leg comes off in the
Speaker 1: middle of a plane, I'm going potty. So my girlfriend
Speaker 1: has a saying tinkle. Sorry. I just think it's like
Speaker 1: the cutest thing in the world. Like you say potty, though,
Speaker 1: I I gotta go potty, but I want to like
Speaker 1: fully clear it up which party I'm doing. So okay,
Speaker 1: I will not pee during a game. I just I'm afraid.
Speaker 1: And also, you know, I'm realizing I'm gonna stay hydrated.
Speaker 1: I'm dealing with fertility stuff, like what am I doing?
Speaker 1: Why am I killing myself? So you kind of scared
Speaker 1: the living be Jesus out of me, whether it's a
Speaker 1: kidney stone, whether it's my appendix. I was like, I'm
Speaker 1: not going to do this to my body anymore. So
Speaker 1: I started hydrating on the sidelines this week and this
Speaker 1: was Thursday night. Who played Oh we were in Cleveland
Speaker 1: since Jack's yeah, and I started hydrating. Well, when you hydrate,
Speaker 1: you have to go pee. So I had texted you
Speaker 1: and Jackie during the game and I said, I gotta
Speaker 1: peeble then you know the jokes with you you haven't
Speaker 1: gone in five days. But then the game started getting
Speaker 1: good like it would started getting good in the third,
Speaker 1: so I was like, crap, I can't go pee yet.
Speaker 1: So finally it was the fourth and I'm like, what
Speaker 1: am I doing to myself? What am I doing to myself?
Speaker 1: I looked at our security Clinton, who's adorable, and I said,
Speaker 1: I've got a pee and he goes, wow, this curis
Speaker 1: of things really affected you, hasn't it, because they all
Speaker 1: know I don't pee. So I said yes. So I
Speaker 1: ran out of the stadium in you know, into like
Speaker 1: the locker room to go pee, which is not got
Speaker 1: this which is not right. This is a feast. Joe
Speaker 1: Burrows driving the end zone. I have to drive. So
Speaker 1: it was full blown ted Lasso him leaving the game
Speaker 1: to have a panic attack, only I was going to
Speaker 1: take up tankle So I'm like running with my head
Speaker 1: down like Ted Lasso, and I come out and I
Speaker 1: go pee and then we run back out and I
Speaker 1: saw a couple of security guards and they were like, wow,
Speaker 1: that was quick, and I was like, yeah, probably, you
Speaker 1: know whatever. So I got a d M from a
Speaker 1: Calm Down podcast listener that said, I was so worried
Speaker 1: you were having a ted Lasso moment because I saw
Speaker 1: you run with your head down to get out of
Speaker 1: the said. I was like, no, I was just saying,
Speaker 1: that's really cute. But then, can I tell you what
Speaker 1: happened when I went to go pee. And we've discussed
Speaker 1: the bathroom situations at these stadiums, and you know, whatever
Speaker 1: it happens, they're old, you're sharing this luckily was a
Speaker 1: restroom that was just for females. So I'm gonna be honest.
Speaker 1: I mean, I'm gonna put it out there. You talked
Speaker 1: about not going to the bathroom for five six days.
Speaker 1: I can't do the squat thing. I can't do the
Speaker 1: squad thing because I don't let all because you're so
Speaker 1: worried about balancing. You're not getting all your p out.
Speaker 1: You know what you? Okay, you, I say, but I
Speaker 1: cover the whole toilet. That's why it takes forever, several
Speaker 1: toilet seats covers or I do like toilet paper back
Speaker 1: and forth. But this is what happened. No, I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna let you hold on. We're gonna get into the
Speaker 1: technique of this, because there's not always the seat covers.
Speaker 1: And now that's why I do the toilet paper, okay,
Speaker 1: which I appreciate, but now it's if it's the single ply,
Speaker 1: now it's not heavy enough and we're falling in. And
Speaker 1: that's why it takes me longer, because I do like
Speaker 1: four or five rolls, you know, and then it's like
Speaker 1: then if it falls off, it's not balancing. There's a
Speaker 1: gust of wind, like it's such a thing, and I
Speaker 1: get so mad, and then I'm dealing with a body suit,
Speaker 1: and that's upsetting me all the things. So I'm trying
Speaker 1: to hurry. There are, thankfully toilet seat covers, and I
Speaker 1: grabbed like five or six of them at a time.
Speaker 1: I'm not a waster. I'm just really worried about germs.
Speaker 1: I put them on, rip off my body suit, sit down.
Speaker 1: The toilet seats broken, and I fell in. You did
Speaker 1: not look ahead, You did not you wait time you
Speaker 1: fell in. It went off to the side and my
Speaker 1: bum fell in. Oh my, oh, and there's five minutes
Speaker 1: left of the game. I gotta get back on the field.
Speaker 1: I don't know if Trevor Lawrence is gonna get his
Speaker 1: first win of the season. Break this losing streak. Don't
Speaker 1: worry about that. Um oh my god. Meanwhile, the crowd
Speaker 1: goes wild. Aaron's in the toilet, only one snap of
Speaker 1: the body suit. Oh my god, I can't believe you
Speaker 1: fell in the twist this one. You gotta work. I
Speaker 1: didn't even click the body suit at that point. I
Speaker 1: just shoved it in my pants and ran, Oh my god.
Speaker 1: We need so many things about this. We gotta work
Speaker 1: on some wall sets for you. We gotta work on
Speaker 1: the quad street. Don't let all your p out if
Speaker 1: you squat with you. I just can't believe you found
Speaker 1: your black In this week's podcast, Aaron falls in the
Speaker 1: toilet in Cincinnati and Carissa can't take a We're here
Speaker 1: for everybody. We're here for everybody exactly. Oh my god,
Speaker 1: you poor thing. Where you were You're like, you poor thing.
Speaker 1: You're the one that had surgery this week. I'm fine.
Speaker 1: I think. I think by the way you buried the lead,
Speaker 1: you bury your ass in the toilet. I mean, my god,
Speaker 1: you're worried about touching the rim of it. Just get
Speaker 1: on in there. Oh, David, Well, I'm look, I think
Speaker 1: it's fair to say we've been through some traumatic situations
Speaker 1: this week, and we have to tell we can wrap
Speaker 1: it all up after this and then uh talk about
Speaker 1: what we have looking ahead. What I mean, I think
Speaker 1: that's we'll wrap up what you need to wrap up
Speaker 1: your ass. I wrap up the toilet. I had fun
Speaker 1: with the Calm Down podcast. I g yesterday I felt
Speaker 1: like I had to record every little thing of me
Speaker 1: sitting there changing my outfit, all the things. Yeah, that
Speaker 1: little ZiT thing really works, so huh it is. But
Speaker 1: I got another one over here, so it's a good thing.
Speaker 1: I bought like a about a whole package of them
Speaker 1: coming up. ZiT STICKA should be a sponsor the stick. Um.
Speaker 1: Aaron was documenting her day and part of that was
Speaker 1: she just mentioned a wardrobe change. She text me with
Speaker 1: the game was not going the way we wanted it.
Speaker 1: We both wanted Brady to win decisively, and so she goes,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna change my shirt and I was like, fine,
Speaker 1: I'll change my pants and it wasn't because I had
Speaker 1: an accident. You did that? What do you got this week?
Speaker 1: Look happy? Um, I'm gonna get caught up on my
Speaker 1: life since you know, everything stopped down, and I'm gonna
Speaker 1: get caught up on that. I have a lot of
Speaker 1: just house and home stuff. I don't have any features
Speaker 1: this week, but I'm so excited Thursday night football. Thank
Speaker 1: god my Seahawks one yesterday. Look the defense, and I'm like,
Speaker 1: I get it. But we have had defensive deficiencies. We've
Speaker 1: had offensive line deficiencies, and Russell's always the person that
Speaker 1: can make up for it. Aren't you sitting down with
Speaker 1: your defense be bad? That's what I don't understand. I mean,
Speaker 1: besides Chuck Griffin, who have you lost? Like? Why is
Speaker 1: it bad? Well, Cliff, we've lost. We've lost, I mean
Speaker 1: kJ right, We've lost linebacker, we've lost pressure, We've we
Speaker 1: we also we lost to jen Avean Clowney, which I
Speaker 1: actually wish would have worked out. We need pressure upfront.
Speaker 1: Everything of football is, you know, better than anyone starts upfront,
Speaker 1: and our upfront, our defensive line and our offensive line
Speaker 1: have always been well, No, not always. I shouldn't say that.
Speaker 1: Our offensive line has always had deficiencies, and Russell has
Speaker 1: made up for those Defensively, We've been able to get
Speaker 1: pressure upfront and have the back half of that defensively
Speaker 1: in a bloom whatever. But we are Jamal Adams. I mean,
Speaker 1: where's this guy been? You know? In a division like
Speaker 1: the NFC West that is so good, they cannot afford
Speaker 1: to make any mistakes. Also, they haven't scored their first
Speaker 1: half team offensively and haven't scored a lot of points
Speaker 1: in the second half. Anyways, this division. I'm excited for
Speaker 1: the game on Thursday Thursday. Yeah, so when you go
Speaker 1: to Seattle, I think I'm gonna have to go. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna have to go Tuesday night because I have to
Speaker 1: sit down with Wressell on Wednesday. And then yeah, it's
Speaker 1: just a busy week. And then I go to Dallas
Speaker 1: this week. I have to sit down with the defense
Speaker 1: on defense. But for Dallas, two interceptions yes please app
Speaker 1: and um, Michael park fin, I'm all in, Mica Parsons.
Speaker 1: This put him anywhere? Yeah, well that'll be fun. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and then yep, come home or maybe not come home.
Speaker 1: We'll see what happens. There's a lot going on, but
Speaker 1: it's a week five okay, sure, I'll be documenting it
Speaker 1: all on the Calm Down podcast. I g check it out.
Speaker 1: Check it out, check it out, and we'll work on
Speaker 1: you doing some wall sits and I'm going to get
Speaker 1: some abdominal crunches in. Yeah. Um, thank you for being
Speaker 1: so lovely and supportive as a friend as you always are,
Speaker 1: especially in a time of need. And if anyone needs
Speaker 1: some bathroom advice, just listen to this episode again. UM,
Speaker 1: I love you. Good luck this week and also to
Speaker 1: you guys. I want to bring back I want to
Speaker 1: answer any questions, so calm down podcast d M s.
Speaker 1: We get all of your d M to ask us
Speaker 1: any questions whether you have, whether it's sports related or anything.
Speaker 1: Just I wanna do a question and answer SASH again
Speaker 1: with anyone that's still listening. Are you there? Tommy's going
Speaker 1: on with the instagrammes? Like, oh I saw that. I
Speaker 1: don't know what the deal is. I don't either, Okay,
Speaker 1: love you. Calm down with Learning. Chrissa is a production
Speaker 1: of I Heart Radio. For more podcasts from my Heart Radio,
Speaker 1: visit the I Heart Radio app, Apple podcast, or wherever
Speaker 1: you get your podcast m