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Speaker 1: Welcome one and all to the Professional Homegirl Podcast. Before

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Speaker 1: we begin today's episode, we want to remind you that

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Speaker 1: the views and opinions expressed on this podcast are those

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Speaker 1: of the host and guests and are intended for educational

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Speaker 1: and entertaining purposes. In this safe space, no question is

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Speaker 1: off limits because you never know how someone's storyline can

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Speaker 1: be your lifeline. The Professional Homegirl Podcast is here to

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Speaker 1: celebrate the diverse voices, stories and experiences of women of color,

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Speaker 1: providing a platform for authentic and empowering conversations. There will

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Speaker 1: be some key king, some tears, but most importantly a

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Speaker 1: reminder that tough times don't last, but professional homegirls do

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Speaker 1: enjoy the show.

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Speaker 2: What's a Professional home Girls? It's Shagar Epine here, and

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Speaker 2: I hope all is cute.

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Speaker 3: Now.

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Speaker 2: This week's episode is a real treat, so we're just

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Speaker 2: gonna jump right in. Okay, So I have been working

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Speaker 2: on this one since last year, right and as you

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Speaker 2: all know, I dropped my spooky series every October. So

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Speaker 2: originally I wanted to share this episode then, but my

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Speaker 2: guests and I we couldn't get our schedules on the

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Speaker 2: same page. Because you know, life be lifeing but you

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Speaker 2: know your girl doesn't give up, okay, And I'm also

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Speaker 2: cash this word. I am also a firm believer that

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Speaker 2: delay does not mean denial. So my guest is here

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Speaker 2: to share her story today on surviving the infamous Lake Lanier,

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Speaker 2: known for its eerie history, unexplained drownness, and supernatural encounters.

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Speaker 2: Lake Lanier has claimed countless lives, but My guests live

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Speaker 2: to tell the tale. However, Lake Lanier is just a

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Speaker 2: fragment of her story, from seeing spiritual beings as a

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Speaker 2: child to enduring the heartbreaking loss of her sister in

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Speaker 2: a murdered suard side. My guess journey is a testament

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Speaker 2: to unshakable faith, resilience, encourage in the face of unimaginable challenges.

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Speaker 2: So this is one of those episodes that you don't

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Speaker 2: want to miss, guys, So please grab your headphones and

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Speaker 2: get cozy, because I survived Lake Lanier. Starts now, y'all.

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Speaker 2: Me and my guests was just key king, and I

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Speaker 2: was just telling her don't be all nervous and stuff,

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Speaker 2: because I know she far from shy to my guess,

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Speaker 2: how you feeling. How you doing?

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Speaker 3: I'm doing well and I'm feeling pretty good. I have

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Speaker 3: no complaints. Add on, Hey.

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Speaker 2: Guys, yes, y'all, I am so excited to have her

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Speaker 2: on the show. We've been working on trying to get

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Speaker 2: her on the show since since October, right or before then?

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Speaker 3: Yep? Since August? Yeah right.

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Speaker 2: Listen, one thing about meghbors, one thing about me, y'all.

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Speaker 2: Y'all know, I am very persistent. I was texting her,

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Speaker 2: I was emailing her. I was like, please, when the

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Speaker 2: time it's right, I really want you to be on

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Speaker 2: the show. And we finally made it happen. So I

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Speaker 2: really appreciate you taking the time at your day to

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Speaker 2: speak with me.

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Speaker 3: I appreciate your persistence.

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Speaker 2: Sae, there we go. Yeah, well, I'm one of the

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Speaker 2: main reasons why I want to have you on the

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Speaker 2: show because I've been doing a lot of research on

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Speaker 2: Lake Lanier, and I have never seen a black person

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Speaker 2: share their survivor story, have you.

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Speaker 3: Well, no, and I had actually not even talked about

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Speaker 3: it for years until you saw me do until the

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Speaker 3: TikTok that I did Surviving Likely Near in nineteen ninety seven,

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Speaker 3: I hadn't talked about it in about twenty years. It

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Speaker 3: had been a long time before I even brought it

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Speaker 3: up again because of the memories and stuff and all

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Speaker 3: the emotions that came along with it. It was just

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Speaker 3: not something that I talked talked about because normally when

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Speaker 3: you do talk about something like that, people automatical because

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Speaker 3: they don't know about Oscarville first of all, and neither

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Speaker 3: did I. Like I said, I only learned about Oscarville

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Speaker 3: like three years ago. Oh wow, about ten years ago

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Speaker 3: that I learned about Oscarville. So I had no clue

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Speaker 3: of what was going on. But once I found out

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Speaker 3: about Oscarville, that made me understand why there was trees

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Speaker 3: underneath the water, because I'm never understood that. So, yeah,

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Speaker 3: I've never heard anybody tell me that they've almost drowned

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Speaker 3: there and that they made it. Most people don't make it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, for those who didn't know, Oscarville was once

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Speaker 2: a thriving black community before being submerged to create Lake

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Speaker 2: lan NERD. So do you feel like the history of

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Speaker 2: Oscarville is well known or do you feel like it's

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Speaker 2: intentionally overlook.

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Speaker 3: I feel like it's been hidden or you know, some

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Speaker 3: time now because nobody and my family even knew about

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Speaker 3: Oscarville either. Yeah, I mean, my mom is eighty two

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Speaker 3: years old from Alabama and she had never heard of Oscarville,

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Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. So I think it's more

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Speaker 3: of something like out of sight, out of mind, let's

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Speaker 3: bury it and let's hide what's going on. And if

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Speaker 3: you don't uh, I said, let's say read or ask questions.

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Speaker 3: Some things we won't know, you know. So Yeah, I

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Speaker 3: think that I don't think that it was something that

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Speaker 3: they wanted us to know about. That's why they created

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Speaker 3: Lake Lanear.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. I agree, because I feel like if you're not

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Speaker 2: from that area, then you wouldn't know, because I didn't.

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Speaker 2: I didn't find out about lke Lanariir until like a

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Speaker 2: couple of years before, maybe like five years ago.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's been three for me.

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Speaker 2: Yeah. So why do you think people are so fascinated

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Speaker 2: by the ghost stories and myths surrounding Lake Lanary because

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Speaker 2: your story went viral. Your story went viral a couple

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Speaker 2: of times.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, did probably because it's a lot of people in

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Speaker 3: the world that experienced paranormal things, and that not just

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Speaker 3: saying just in the lake. There's a lot of people

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Speaker 3: who experience things in their homes growing up as children,

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Speaker 3: and it's not stuff that you can just readily just

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Speaker 3: go and talk to anybody about you know what exactly.

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Speaker 3: People you have, you have to keep that stuff in

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Speaker 3: for like years and years and years because you feel

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Speaker 3: like if I go tell somebody about it, they're not

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Speaker 3: gonna believe me. They're gonna think that I'm just making

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Speaker 3: up some stuff. Because there was quite a few people

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Speaker 3: who had, you know, some crazy stuff to say, Like

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Speaker 3: my inbox went off. That's kind of why I went

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Speaker 3: silent for a minute, because my inbox it was crazy.

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Speaker 3: They got kind of crazy what they were saying, like

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Speaker 3: we're stuff like, you know, like I'm trying to start

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Speaker 3: a race war, and I'm like, I'm not trying to

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Speaker 3: start anything. The only thing that I did was tell

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Speaker 3: my story. And in the process of telling my story,

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Speaker 3: there was already they were already doing on the Lanear Trail,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean, They had already did the

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Speaker 3: Lanear movie. And then it was so specific how God

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Speaker 3: told me to name it Surviving Lake Lanier nineteen ninety

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Speaker 3: seven because he knew that he had already had people

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Speaker 3: out there that was making a documentary called Surviving Lake Lanier.

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Speaker 3: So that way I wasn't stepping on their toes and

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Speaker 3: they weren't stepping on mine, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: And then they reached out to me and we all

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Speaker 3: got together. They made it happen, just like you just

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Speaker 3: made this happen. That made it happen, and that's how

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Speaker 3: the documentary came about. But yeah, I haven't. I don't

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Speaker 3: know of anyone other than myself opening up my mouth

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Speaker 3: and saying something. Who even knew about Oscarville?

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Speaker 2: Yeah? Did you ever experience paranormal before?

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Speaker 3: Oh? Yeah, I've been. I've been living with this my

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Speaker 3: whole life. I've been a fear my whole life. I'm

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Speaker 3: a seal. I can see, I can hear, I can smell,

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Speaker 3: I can feel sounds weird. But all that my whole

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Speaker 3: life since I was a child. I had a crazy

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Speaker 3: childhood growing up. You know, I was one of those

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Speaker 3: kids who they used to say that witch ride your

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Speaker 3: back and slanging around the room, you know what I mean. So, yeah,

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Speaker 3: it's nothing. Paranormal things is nothing new to me. I've

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Speaker 3: been dealing with this stuff my whole life.

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Speaker 2: Was there ever a situation where you were scared when

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Speaker 2: you was a kid?

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Speaker 3: Pretty much my whole childhood. It took my mom to

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Speaker 3: you know, tell me to teach me about please the

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Speaker 3: blood of Jesus. You know, as a child, that's what

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Speaker 3: your mom teaches, you know, you plead the blood of

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Speaker 3: Jesus and that'll allow you to be loosed. But I've

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Speaker 3: had some experiences even in my home growing up where

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Speaker 3: there used to be. I know, it's gonna sound so

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Speaker 3: crazy to some people, but for there's a remnant of

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Speaker 3: people that I won't sound crazy to. And that's the

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Speaker 3: remnant of people that God got me here for. There

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Speaker 3: was just like a little demon, I called it a

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Speaker 3: little m and he was very visible in my home,

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Speaker 3: like like to like go from in my house, like

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Speaker 3: we had the first area of the house was the

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Speaker 3: front area where all the kids lived. The first the

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Speaker 3: living room, dining room, all that stuff. Then you had

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Speaker 3: the kitchen which separated the back of the house, which

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Speaker 3: was the den in my parents' room. So if you

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Speaker 3: were in the den watching TV or something and the

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Speaker 3: doorbell around, you had to run full speed to the

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Speaker 3: door because if you didn't, you was gonna see that

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Speaker 3: little thing I call it a little m. He would

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Speaker 3: be standing like right in the corner. It was a

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Speaker 3: little short, little green emp be in my house like

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Speaker 3: We found out years later that some man who lived

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Speaker 3: there before us committed suicide in the house. I don't

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Speaker 3: know if they had something to do with it or what,

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Speaker 3: but me and my sister, having my sister Tavia, I

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Speaker 3: don't know if I should be saying their names, but anyways,

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Speaker 3: we grew up with a lot of paranormal activities going

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Speaker 3: on in our house. Is all the way down to

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Speaker 3: the clowns that oh I don't fuck with no clowns now,

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Speaker 3: I don't fool with them girls, right, I don't fool

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Speaker 3: with them.

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Speaker 2: And I love like scary movies and stuff, but clowns, Nah,

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Speaker 2: that's not my bag.

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Speaker 3: And I used to want scary movies, but I don't

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Speaker 3: watch them anymore. I don't. If I do, it has

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Speaker 3: to be daytime for me to watch a scary movie.

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Speaker 3: I will not watch a scary movie after dark.

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Speaker 2: Well, I will say there was a period of time

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Speaker 2: where I took a break from watching scary movies because

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Speaker 2: I was just like, I think I was just going

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Speaker 2: through my own little spiritual awakening with certain things, and

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Speaker 2: I was like, oh no, let me take a little

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Speaker 2: break because things were starting to get a little too

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Speaker 2: weird for me. So Yeah, I definitely understand you with that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I get it.

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Speaker 2: Now, do you feel that the media and local authorities

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Speaker 2: do enough to inform the public about the dangers of

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Speaker 2: the lake?

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Speaker 3: Because I don't live there, I don't live in that area,

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Speaker 3: I can't really tell you what they do because I

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Speaker 3: don't live in that area, right. You know? Now, my sister,

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Speaker 3: her husband, he was raised in that area, so he

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Speaker 3: knows about the lake. He spent time on the lake

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Speaker 3: and everything, you know what I mean. But I don't

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Speaker 3: think he even knew about Oscarville. I think he learned

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Speaker 3: about Oscarville at the same you know, during this whole

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Speaker 3: situation of surviving Lake Lanier. I don't think he even

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Speaker 3: I don't think that they told him the stories.

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Speaker 2: Did he have any experiences or did anything feel a

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Speaker 2: little weird to him that you know of?

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Speaker 3: I know, if I'm not mistaken, I don't want to

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Speaker 3: lie on my brother in law, but I'm almost positive

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Speaker 3: that one of his friends growing up lost his life

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Speaker 3: in that lake. I'm almost positive that my brother in

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Speaker 3: law is the one that gave me that story of

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Speaker 3: one of his friends. I haven't talked to many people

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Speaker 3: that grew up around the lake, other than one other

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Speaker 3: teacher that well, a social worker that works at my

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Speaker 3: son's school. She would come around quite a bit and stuff.

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Speaker 3: But it's like, ever since she saw the documentary, she

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Speaker 3: don't even come around them all. She used to, Like,

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Speaker 3: it's a lot weird things that started happening around where

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Speaker 3: I live. Like I'm literally trying to find a place

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Speaker 3: to move right now, right now, Like that's I'm telling you.

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Speaker 3: The reason why I kind of went quiet is because

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Speaker 3: strange things started happening around where I live. Like the

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Speaker 3: people out here where I live, they know that that's

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Speaker 3: me on the documentary. My children are very proud of

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Speaker 3: their mom, so you know they are walking advertisement of Hey,

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Speaker 3: check out Surviving Lake Lanier on Amazon Prime. And we

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Speaker 3: had a situation where one of the neighbors I have

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Speaker 3: a grandson. He's a mixed young man, right, so he

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Speaker 3: has some friends. That's their neighbor. We all live in

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Speaker 3: the same Traylor Park or main in fact, your home park.

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Speaker 3: How you want to say it, I.

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Speaker 2: Don't want to give you. But you're in the south

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Speaker 2: right right, okay, right?

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Speaker 3: And uh so, when when it was found out that

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Speaker 3: that's me, you know, lady with the big old Afro.

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Speaker 3: That's that's her. They began to not want their kids

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Speaker 3: to play with My son. Told my grandson that his

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Speaker 3: uncle was going to be the downfall of him, which

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Speaker 3: would be my son, that his uncle would be the

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Speaker 3: downfall of him, the little black boy, you know what

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Speaker 3: I mean, Just like little stuff called CPS on my

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Speaker 3: my granddaughter, well, my granddaughter and grandson both the same on.

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Speaker 3: Their mom had CPS go over there to the house

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Speaker 3: and you know, just saying all kinds of stuff. But

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Speaker 3: the reality of the situation was he's a racist, which

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Speaker 3: that is what he is. He's a proud walks around

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Speaker 3: probably and says it and created strife between children. Mmm,

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Speaker 3: just by me bringing just for me, share my story,

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Speaker 3: you know what I mean? My garbage can do you

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Speaker 3: know what I mean? The garbage cans I've bought because

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Speaker 3: they don't have it on the they don't have it

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Speaker 3: on the city right, so they have a private they

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Speaker 3: have private people who come out here and do the trash.

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Speaker 3: My garbage can has been stolen time after time after time.

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Speaker 3: I keep spending thirty five forty five fifty dollars on

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Speaker 3: garbage cans. Write my name, not my name, but my

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Speaker 3: my house number and all that stuff from there, and

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Speaker 3: some kind of way. Even though we got cameras out here,

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Speaker 3: my garbage cans keep coming up missing, packages come up missing.

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Speaker 3: I mean, just I've had none of these problems for

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Speaker 3: the last four years that I've been out here. I've

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Speaker 3: been out here this year would be four years, and

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Speaker 3: I've not had no problems ever since August. I've had

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Speaker 3: some crazy stuff going on around where I stay. I've

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Speaker 3: received some crazy inboxes. You know. It's just like crazy stuff.

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Speaker 3: You know. I'm saying that I'm trying to create a

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Speaker 3: race war, you know, and I'm not doing it. It

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Speaker 3: has nothing to do with a race war. Has something

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Speaker 3: to do with knowing who you are, Okay, knowing your

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Speaker 3: story and telling your story has nothing to do with

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Speaker 3: his story. Has something to do with our story and

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Speaker 3: want to know our stories, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: So not out of fear or anything like that, but

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Speaker 3: out of wisdom, because I do have children that run

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Speaker 3: around out here and play and have a you know,

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Speaker 3: I just have I'm actually looking for a place to

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Speaker 3: move right now.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, do with everything that's going on, do you have

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Speaker 2: regress of sharing your story?

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Speaker 3: No? I do not, because greater is he that's in

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Speaker 3: me than he that's in the world. I'm a strong

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Speaker 3: believer in the word. I stand on it, you know

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Speaker 3: what I mean. So hey, it is what it is.

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Speaker 3: God created me for such a time as this to

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Speaker 3: tell the story. He allowed me to live for a reason.

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Speaker 3: So I mean, there's no reason to be afraid. If

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Speaker 3: I was gonna be dead, I would have died then.

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Speaker 3: And that's not the only time that the devil has

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Speaker 3: tried to take me out of here. But that that's

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Speaker 3: not the only near death experience I've had. I've had

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Speaker 3: several throughout my life, you know what I mean. But

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Speaker 3: I'm still here to be sitting right here talking to

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Speaker 3: you right now. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I mean, so you spoke about the negative responses you received.

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Speaker 2: What were some of the positive responses, because I know

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Speaker 2: a lot of people have to reach out and just like,

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Speaker 2: thank you for.

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Speaker 3: Now. I got way more positive than negative, way more

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Speaker 3: positive than negative. I got so many people of all backgrounds.

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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna just say black people, white people, trying

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Speaker 3: to I mean of all backgrounds reaching out and saying,

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Speaker 3: you know, if you ever decide to do anything where

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Speaker 3: we go to the lake and just pay homage to

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Speaker 3: the falling you know what I mean to the town.

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Speaker 3: I mean, I have several different people who say that

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Speaker 3: they would love to do that. Please keep them informed

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Speaker 3: if anything like that about Yes, I would if the

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Speaker 3: I'm not gonna say if I'm gonna say when when

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Speaker 3: my pockets are blessed to be able to do that,

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Speaker 3: then by all means I am if I find some

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Speaker 3: if there's some people who want to step up and say, well, hey,

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Speaker 3: let's go in together money you know, money wise, I'm

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Speaker 3: gonna ask anybody for anything. But if anybody want to

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Speaker 3: come together and do that, I'm I'm about that life.

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Speaker 3: Yes I would.

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Speaker 2: I would know you about that life.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, I would. I would, And I would bring my children.

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Speaker 3: Now I'm not telling you I'm gonna get in the water.

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Speaker 3: I'm not even gonna tell you I'm go out on

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Speaker 3: a boat on the water. No, No, I'm not doing

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Speaker 3: that now. And I did do that during when story, Yeah,

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Speaker 3: yeah I did. I did get the opportunity to go

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Speaker 3: out there and do that, you know what I mean.

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Speaker 3: And that bought a lot of peace to me too.

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Speaker 2: Oh after you after nineteen ninety seven, yeah, free, But

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Speaker 2: I didn't know I didn't know that you went back

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Speaker 2: out there because I know you have a fear for

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Speaker 2: large bodies of waters and pools, so I didn't be

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Speaker 2: out on the boat. Yeah, okay, so we'll get to

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00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:47,040
Speaker 2: that part because I didn't know that. Wow. So you

337
00:16:47,080 --> 00:16:50,240
Speaker 2: do believe that there is a spiritual connection between physical

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Speaker 2: places and spiritual energy.

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Speaker 3: Yes, I do. I do. I believe that there was

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Speaker 3: a movie. I can't think of the name of the movie,

341
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Speaker 3: but it was as if life left, like when people leave,

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Speaker 3: their lives leave like stains in the earth, you know

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Speaker 3: what I mean. I don't know. I just know that

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Speaker 3: when I do know this, when my husband passed, I'll

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Speaker 3: just give you a little snippet. When my husband passed

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Speaker 3: and I went to the hospital to sama goodbyees after

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Speaker 3: they called me and let me know that he didn't

348
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Speaker 3: make it. We had to take him off of the respiratory.

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Speaker 3: We had to take him off of that. He survived

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Speaker 3: for a few hours, several hours actually, they called me

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Speaker 3: and they told me that that he had passed. So

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Speaker 3: and I didn't want to see that. So I was

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Speaker 3: not there when he took his last breath because that's

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Speaker 3: not something that I.

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Speaker 2: Wanted to see.

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Speaker 3: Right. So, but when I went there and I went

357
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Speaker 3: in that room, it was so quiet, and my husband's

358
00:17:48,160 --> 00:17:51,400
Speaker 3: snort really really loud, so for it to be so quiet,

359
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Speaker 3: it was just like a not eerie But it was

360
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Speaker 3: one of the most peaceful, beautiful feelings that I could.

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Speaker 3: I can't even explain it to you. How beautiful he

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00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:03,520
Speaker 3: he looked so beautiful. And I stood over the bed

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Speaker 3: and I leaned over like this to look into his face,

364
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Speaker 3: and at the same exact moment, he his spiritual self

365
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Speaker 3: was standing on the other side of the bed. He

366
00:18:14,240 --> 00:18:17,200
Speaker 3: looked like crystallized water. The closest thing that I can

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Speaker 3: tell you to what I saw was like TC Don

368
00:18:20,920 --> 00:18:25,879
Speaker 3: gold Chase. You know that. He looked like that. And

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Speaker 3: we both at the same time leaned over and looked

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Speaker 3: at him, and like looked at each other. And the

371
00:18:30,480 --> 00:18:33,280
Speaker 3: chaplain was in the room, and I turned around and

372
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Speaker 3: looked at the chap His eyes was big. I said,

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Speaker 3: did you just do that? He said, ma'am, I don't

374
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Speaker 3: really know what I just saw. I said, oh, you

375
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Speaker 3: know what you saw? He saw the same thing that

376
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Speaker 3: I just saw. You know what I mean? He was

377
00:18:45,480 --> 00:18:48,399
Speaker 3: like crystallized water. So I know for a fact one

378
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Speaker 3: hundred percent that just like there's a physical world, there's

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Speaker 3: a spiritual world, because I saw him in the spirit.

380
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Speaker 3: Four months later, I saw my father the same way.

381
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Speaker 3: Like I was laying on my couch and my home.

382
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Speaker 3: I didn't know my dad was gone. I saw the

383
00:19:02,960 --> 00:19:06,800
Speaker 3: crystallized man, which like look right at my face while

384
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Speaker 3: I was laying on the couch here like peep down

385
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Speaker 3: in my face and look down on my face. And

386
00:19:09,760 --> 00:19:13,320
Speaker 3: I was like, said, other, then, is that you. I said,

387
00:19:13,840 --> 00:19:16,480
Speaker 3: just give me a sign if that's you, because I'm

388
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Speaker 3: not afraid right now, I'm not afraid, So give me

389
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Speaker 3: a sign if that's you. Twenty twenty minutes passed by,

390
00:19:22,840 --> 00:19:26,840
Speaker 3: no sign like the twenty one. Like mark twenty one,

391
00:19:27,800 --> 00:19:32,880
Speaker 3: it happened again, and I was like confused because I said,

392
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Speaker 3: give me a sign if that was you, and nothing happened.

393
00:19:36,040 --> 00:19:38,840
Speaker 3: And then right after it happened that second time, my

394
00:19:38,920 --> 00:19:43,240
Speaker 3: phone wrong. It was my mom saying that my dad

395
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Speaker 3: was happening. Yeah, that was my dad. No one can

396
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Speaker 3: tell me that my dad didn't come to see about

397
00:19:47,840 --> 00:19:49,960
Speaker 3: me before you left, you know what I mean, before

398
00:19:50,040 --> 00:19:53,280
Speaker 3: he I don't know how it goes. Nobody has ever

399
00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:55,720
Speaker 3: taught me on that. I've never heard people in church

400
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Speaker 3: say that when you pass away, when a person passed away,

401
00:19:59,640 --> 00:20:02,960
Speaker 3: they sole for a little while or something. I've never

402
00:20:03,000 --> 00:20:05,119
Speaker 3: heard that. You know, you see it in movies, but

403
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:08,399
Speaker 3: I've never heard anyone say it. But I've experienced it

404
00:20:08,440 --> 00:20:11,640
Speaker 3: in real life by actually seeing my loved one after

405
00:20:11,680 --> 00:20:16,480
Speaker 3: they passed from life from a from a physical body

406
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:18,840
Speaker 3: to a spiritual body. I've actually saw that with my

407
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Speaker 3: eyes twice.

408
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Speaker 2: You know, I feel like a lot of people can

409
00:20:30,680 --> 00:20:33,399
Speaker 2: relate to those instances because I had a situation like

410
00:20:33,440 --> 00:20:36,560
Speaker 2: that with my grandmother and before she transitioned, I had

411
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:40,000
Speaker 2: a dream that she was gonna leave, and so next

412
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Speaker 2: thing you know, she did pass away. So it's like

413
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Speaker 2: sometimes I be feeling like the spirit world be preparing

414
00:20:45,119 --> 00:20:48,600
Speaker 2: you for certain things before it happens, especially when somebody

415
00:20:48,600 --> 00:20:51,320
Speaker 2: that's near and dear to you. Yes, because in my

416
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:54,359
Speaker 2: dream when she was when she passed away, I was hysterical,

417
00:20:54,400 --> 00:20:56,160
Speaker 2: but I couldn't see her face. But I'm like, who

418
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:58,920
Speaker 2: else would I act like this with it? And then true

419
00:20:59,000 --> 00:21:01,840
Speaker 2: enough the time, So I believe you. I believe in

420
00:21:01,880 --> 00:21:03,600
Speaker 2: all this stuff sometimes because I think a lot of

421
00:21:03,640 --> 00:21:07,400
Speaker 2: times it's just to be a little you know, reminders

422
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:11,640
Speaker 2: and get you ready pairing things of that nature. So yeah,

423
00:21:11,680 --> 00:21:14,200
Speaker 2: So what knowing the full history of Oscarville had changed

424
00:21:14,200 --> 00:21:16,520
Speaker 2: your decision to visit lake Land Are in the first place.

425
00:21:18,359 --> 00:21:20,800
Speaker 3: No, because actually I didn't know anything about Lakeland Air.

426
00:21:20,840 --> 00:21:23,400
Speaker 3: I was in job corps, so it was a field trip.

427
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:25,760
Speaker 3: So I was excited about going to the lake, you

428
00:21:25,800 --> 00:21:27,520
Speaker 3: know what I mean. That was like the closest thing

429
00:21:27,560 --> 00:21:30,000
Speaker 3: to the beach to me, being that I'm a Florida girl,

430
00:21:30,480 --> 00:21:32,520
Speaker 3: you know, and I'm in the middle of Georgia, in

431
00:21:32,560 --> 00:21:34,480
Speaker 3: the middle of nowhere. To know, for them to say

432
00:21:34,520 --> 00:21:36,880
Speaker 3: We're gonna go here, that was exciting to me because

433
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,000
Speaker 3: it was to me it was like, I'm going to

434
00:21:38,040 --> 00:21:40,879
Speaker 3: the beach, right, you know what I mean now to

435
00:21:41,040 --> 00:21:44,720
Speaker 3: be on the beach and me, I'm going to stay

436
00:21:44,720 --> 00:21:46,960
Speaker 3: at the shore. I'm not ever going all the way

437
00:21:46,960 --> 00:21:50,119
Speaker 3: into the water. But for some reason I trusted, like

438
00:21:50,160 --> 00:21:53,639
Speaker 3: I said, I got on the float and I trusted Sammy.

439
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:56,199
Speaker 3: We went out in the water and everything happened the

440
00:21:56,200 --> 00:22:00,119
Speaker 3: way that it happened. But I don't I'm not the

441
00:22:00,200 --> 00:22:02,560
Speaker 3: person who goes into the ocean water. I don't.

442
00:22:02,760 --> 00:22:05,960
Speaker 2: I mean just after.

443
00:22:06,760 --> 00:22:09,320
Speaker 3: This was actually like Lanar, this was actually this actually

444
00:22:09,359 --> 00:22:11,280
Speaker 3: happened at Lake Lanier. I was twenty one years old

445
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:11,760
Speaker 3: when this happened.

446
00:22:11,760 --> 00:22:12,840
Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. You say you don't go

447
00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:15,280
Speaker 2: into the ocean at all. Was that before the incident

448
00:22:15,359 --> 00:22:17,879
Speaker 2: or after we did? You always have a fear of

449
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 2: body of water.

450
00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:21,040
Speaker 3: I've always had a fear of large bodies of water.

451
00:22:21,760 --> 00:22:23,480
Speaker 3: But as a child, when we went to the beach,

452
00:22:23,560 --> 00:22:26,119
Speaker 3: my dad could swim, My uncles could swim. You know.

453
00:22:26,160 --> 00:22:29,000
Speaker 3: As a child, we went as family groups and my

454
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:30,680
Speaker 3: dad would put us on his back, and he would

455
00:22:30,720 --> 00:22:32,600
Speaker 3: swim in the ocean, you know, swim in the water

456
00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:35,000
Speaker 3: with us on his back and stuff like that. But

457
00:22:35,080 --> 00:22:38,040
Speaker 3: I've never actually been out in the ocean on my own,

458
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,600
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, on a float or anything

459
00:22:40,680 --> 00:22:42,439
Speaker 3: like that. You know what I mean. I've always been

460
00:22:42,440 --> 00:22:43,680
Speaker 3: afraid of big bodies of water.

461
00:22:44,560 --> 00:22:45,159
Speaker 2: So what made you.

462
00:22:48,160 --> 00:22:52,320
Speaker 3: Because I wanted I'm a protector. I'm a protector. I

463
00:22:52,359 --> 00:22:56,159
Speaker 3: feel like the whole world all around me and it

464
00:22:56,200 --> 00:22:58,480
Speaker 3: ain't gonna touch me. I mean, I don't know, maybe

465
00:22:58,600 --> 00:23:01,800
Speaker 3: you know that's a mental illness. I don't know, but

466
00:23:01,840 --> 00:23:04,720
Speaker 3: it's the way that I actually feel like I'm a protector,

467
00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,840
Speaker 3: and I'm a protector of the people that I love.

468
00:23:07,240 --> 00:23:10,040
Speaker 3: And if I call you my little sister and you

469
00:23:10,119 --> 00:23:12,600
Speaker 3: need me, I'm gonna show up for you. If I

470
00:23:12,640 --> 00:23:15,600
Speaker 3: call you my friend or whatever, I'm gonna be there

471
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:17,720
Speaker 3: for you. And being that twin was she was younger

472
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,520
Speaker 3: than me, you know what I mean, and she wanted

473
00:23:19,560 --> 00:23:22,480
Speaker 3: to go out on the floating. Well, I'm your protector. Now.

474
00:23:22,520 --> 00:23:25,480
Speaker 3: I know that I can swim good enough in my

475
00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:28,439
Speaker 3: mind not to drown because my sister in law, she

476
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:31,480
Speaker 3: was in the Air Force at eighteen, she taught me

477
00:23:31,520 --> 00:23:33,399
Speaker 3: how to swim in the pool though, you know what

478
00:23:33,480 --> 00:23:37,280
Speaker 3: I mean, in a pool, So I knew that I

479
00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:41,080
Speaker 3: could swim good enough not to drown in the pool.

480
00:23:42,119 --> 00:23:44,399
Speaker 3: But at the same time, the water didn't seem like

481
00:23:44,800 --> 00:23:46,920
Speaker 3: I didn't know anything about. There was a drop off.

482
00:23:47,119 --> 00:23:49,600
Speaker 3: You feel me when you walk out into Lake Lanier,

483
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:54,000
Speaker 3: you're walking in water. You're walking like the water may

484
00:23:54,320 --> 00:23:57,600
Speaker 3: maybe come to your waist as you want to maybe

485
00:23:57,760 --> 00:24:00,600
Speaker 3: as you're walking out. I didn't realize that where we

486
00:24:00,720 --> 00:24:03,760
Speaker 3: went it was a drop off. So when I went

487
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:08,320
Speaker 3: off the float, I was in the drop off period. Yeah,

488
00:24:08,760 --> 00:24:11,080
Speaker 3: that's where I was going because I was in trees.

489
00:24:11,280 --> 00:24:13,520
Speaker 3: I wasn't where there was like a sandboy, it wasn't

490
00:24:13,560 --> 00:24:15,960
Speaker 3: no sand and all that. When I dropped off and

491
00:24:16,000 --> 00:24:21,119
Speaker 3: went Now, I went down between trees. Mmm.

492
00:24:22,000 --> 00:24:24,760
Speaker 2: And you men, So there's something like there's something turned

493
00:24:24,800 --> 00:24:27,119
Speaker 2: y'all over, Like how did y'all get underwater?

494
00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:30,439
Speaker 3: A boy did that. I don't want to just call

495
00:24:30,520 --> 00:24:32,800
Speaker 3: him the demon, but I called him the demon back then,

496
00:24:32,920 --> 00:24:37,280
Speaker 3: and I still called him that today because I don't know.

497
00:24:38,119 --> 00:24:40,320
Speaker 3: Just when I'm talking about it, I say the demon,

498
00:24:40,400 --> 00:24:42,159
Speaker 3: you know, I mean the demon boy, you know what

499
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,160
Speaker 3: I mean. But it was a dude who actually came out.

500
00:24:45,200 --> 00:24:47,560
Speaker 3: We were actually out there smoking. I'm not gonna pretend

501
00:24:47,600 --> 00:24:49,440
Speaker 3: like we was out there, you know what I mean.

502
00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:52,080
Speaker 3: We were just out there sun bathing and stuff because

503
00:24:52,080 --> 00:24:54,000
Speaker 3: we wasn't. We went out there so we can smoke

504
00:24:54,359 --> 00:24:57,040
Speaker 3: without getting caught smoking, you know what I mean. So

505
00:24:57,080 --> 00:24:59,120
Speaker 3: it was out there smoking, and he came out there.

506
00:24:59,320 --> 00:25:02,760
Speaker 3: And like I said, twice before that he had smoked

507
00:25:02,800 --> 00:25:06,639
Speaker 3: with us, but on campus, not away from campus, you

508
00:25:06,680 --> 00:25:08,880
Speaker 3: know what I mean. So the second, the first time

509
00:25:08,920 --> 00:25:11,359
Speaker 3: he smoked with us, his eyes turned red he looked weird,

510
00:25:11,560 --> 00:25:14,800
Speaker 3: So I was like, okay, lord, he looked like a deanon,

511
00:25:14,840 --> 00:25:17,040
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. The second time we smoked together,

512
00:25:17,040 --> 00:25:19,600
Speaker 3: I couldn't handle it because I'm like, he actually looked

513
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:21,440
Speaker 3: like a demon, you know what I mean. I can't

514
00:25:21,440 --> 00:25:24,000
Speaker 3: sit him. So after the second time, there is no

515
00:25:24,080 --> 00:25:27,320
Speaker 3: more hanging out, no more chilling. So we end up

516
00:25:27,359 --> 00:25:30,600
Speaker 3: out here. We're on the field tip here he comes. Now.

517
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:32,359
Speaker 3: I haven't said to him, man, I can't I'm not

518
00:25:32,400 --> 00:25:34,280
Speaker 3: smoking with a weed with you no more. I don't

519
00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:36,280
Speaker 3: want to be around you. I haven't said anything like

520
00:25:36,320 --> 00:25:37,520
Speaker 3: that to him, you know what I mean. So he

521
00:25:37,520 --> 00:25:39,600
Speaker 3: didn't know that. But when he came out there, I

522
00:25:39,720 --> 00:25:42,879
Speaker 3: let him know just then we're not ain't nothing, you

523
00:25:42,920 --> 00:25:46,040
Speaker 3: ain't hit my blood, pretty much what he pretty much said,

524
00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:47,960
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. And he went under the water,

525
00:25:48,000 --> 00:25:49,720
Speaker 3: and I'm thinking that he's going under the water to

526
00:25:49,760 --> 00:25:52,360
Speaker 3: swim away, but that's not what he did. He went

527
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:54,400
Speaker 3: under the water, went under the floating, and then came

528
00:25:54,560 --> 00:25:57,240
Speaker 3: up from under the floating and knocked us off the floating.

529
00:25:57,720 --> 00:26:00,720
Speaker 3: Twin went that way. I went that way. Stand with

530
00:26:00,800 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 3: dread saved Twin obviously, because she didn't die, you know

531
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 3: what I mean, And there was nobody around for me,

532
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:12,240
Speaker 3: and I wish I can. I wish that some kind

533
00:26:12,280 --> 00:26:13,920
Speaker 3: of way. I pray to God that Twin is still

534
00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:17,800
Speaker 3: alive and well somewhere in the world. And I pray

535
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:20,760
Speaker 3: to God that at some point it can get to

536
00:26:20,800 --> 00:26:22,960
Speaker 3: her so that I can talk to her and then

537
00:26:22,960 --> 00:26:26,040
Speaker 3: maybe we can come together and talk to you, yeah,

538
00:26:26,080 --> 00:26:29,280
Speaker 3: you know about the situation or whatever. So I can't

539
00:26:29,320 --> 00:26:32,479
Speaker 3: readily tell you what was going on with her because

540
00:26:32,560 --> 00:26:35,600
Speaker 3: I was in the process of what I was going

541
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:38,440
Speaker 3: through with going down up between them, you know, the trees,

542
00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:41,640
Speaker 3: and just like in awe of like, oh my god.

543
00:26:41,480 --> 00:26:43,320
Speaker 2: Could you say you wasn't stared at first? You said

544
00:26:43,320 --> 00:26:44,639
Speaker 2: that she was actually amazed.

545
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,360
Speaker 3: Fear had left my body. There was no fear once

546
00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:50,119
Speaker 3: I hit the water. I can't tell you what I

547
00:26:50,160 --> 00:26:52,960
Speaker 3: was feeling on the fall. I can't tell you on that,

548
00:26:53,400 --> 00:26:56,080
Speaker 3: but once my head went under that water, there was

549
00:26:56,119 --> 00:26:59,399
Speaker 3: no fear. I was amazed at what I saw because

550
00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:00,919
Speaker 3: just like we go outside and we look at the

551
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:03,920
Speaker 3: trees in our yard, how tall, and the trees they

552
00:27:03,920 --> 00:27:05,639
Speaker 3: were under the water, and I was just like, whoa,

553
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,200
Speaker 3: what's trees? Down here. And then I heard a boy

554
00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:13,320
Speaker 3: crazy and it said you're under the water. And I

555
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:15,920
Speaker 3: was like, oh, no, Lord, not like this, not like this.

556
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:19,639
Speaker 3: And then that's when I heard that same voice, just

557
00:27:19,680 --> 00:27:22,479
Speaker 3: as calm as you please, tell me to take my hands,

558
00:27:22,480 --> 00:27:25,719
Speaker 3: cuff them like this and do a flying motion. And

559
00:27:25,800 --> 00:27:27,920
Speaker 3: I did that and I came up out of the water.

560
00:27:28,200 --> 00:27:30,119
Speaker 3: When I came up out of the water, I looked around.

561
00:27:30,119 --> 00:27:32,840
Speaker 3: There was no one around me, so I screamed as

562
00:27:32,880 --> 00:27:37,919
Speaker 3: loud as I could. My thig mom touched and then whoosh,

563
00:27:37,960 --> 00:27:40,560
Speaker 3: back under the water. When I went back under the water,

564
00:27:40,960 --> 00:27:44,520
Speaker 3: same thing. Fear completely left my body. It was as

565
00:27:44,560 --> 00:27:47,560
Speaker 3: if I was amazed, like whoa, that really is trees

566
00:27:47,680 --> 00:27:53,560
Speaker 3: down here? Now? After that point, I don't know. I

567
00:27:53,560 --> 00:27:56,239
Speaker 3: don't know. It's like a blank space. And I've been

568
00:27:56,280 --> 00:27:58,800
Speaker 3: asking God to show me, but I'm not gonna go

569
00:27:58,880 --> 00:28:01,480
Speaker 3: be hypnotized anything like that to try to see and

570
00:28:01,560 --> 00:28:06,479
Speaker 3: asking God. You know, in that space, was I unconscious?

571
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:09,199
Speaker 3: You know, what was what was going on? Because nobody

572
00:28:09,240 --> 00:28:12,880
Speaker 3: was around me, so it had to take whoever, however,

573
00:28:13,640 --> 00:28:15,439
Speaker 3: it had to take them a minute to get to

574
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:17,240
Speaker 3: me because nobody was right there.

575
00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:17,880
Speaker 2: You know what, I mean.

576
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:22,480
Speaker 3: All I know is I realized at some point I

577
00:28:22,560 --> 00:28:24,760
Speaker 3: was no longer under the water and I was alive,

578
00:28:26,040 --> 00:28:28,119
Speaker 3: and I opened my eyes. That's how I know I

579
00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:31,359
Speaker 3: was being carried by a black man, a man of color,

580
00:28:31,520 --> 00:28:34,040
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. Because my head was resting

581
00:28:34,040 --> 00:28:36,560
Speaker 3: in his chest like this, my arms was around his neck,

582
00:28:37,320 --> 00:28:39,200
Speaker 3: and he was carrying me like I was a baby.

583
00:28:39,960 --> 00:28:41,560
Speaker 3: He sat me down on the shore. He walked me

584
00:28:41,560 --> 00:28:43,160
Speaker 3: all the way to the shore. I don't even remember.

585
00:28:44,280 --> 00:28:48,240
Speaker 3: I don't even remember him swimming me to the shore.

586
00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:52,080
Speaker 3: There is no recollection of being swimmed anywhere. He walked

587
00:28:52,080 --> 00:28:55,680
Speaker 3: to me. When my eyes opened, I was being walked.

588
00:28:56,240 --> 00:28:57,240
Speaker 2: Do you think he was real?

589
00:29:00,320 --> 00:29:02,520
Speaker 3: I don't know. I don't want to sound crazy, but

590
00:29:02,560 --> 00:29:04,280
Speaker 3: I don't know that crazy.

591
00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:04,920
Speaker 1: I think.

592
00:29:05,480 --> 00:29:06,400
Speaker 2: Listen, I don't know.

593
00:29:06,480 --> 00:29:10,880
Speaker 3: That's why I said, if if a person did that

594
00:29:11,040 --> 00:29:13,400
Speaker 3: and you hear the story, please say, hey, that was me.

595
00:29:13,880 --> 00:29:15,560
Speaker 3: You know, I'm the person that saved you. I'm the

596
00:29:15,560 --> 00:29:17,560
Speaker 3: person that SUTs you down on the shore, you know

597
00:29:17,600 --> 00:29:20,240
Speaker 3: what I mean? Like, please stand up and say that.

598
00:29:20,360 --> 00:29:24,240
Speaker 3: Because I don't know. I can't tell you who that was.

599
00:29:26,880 --> 00:29:29,040
Speaker 3: All I know is I was set on the shore

600
00:29:29,880 --> 00:29:32,720
Speaker 3: when I sat down, I came out, my head came

601
00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:35,000
Speaker 3: up like this, you know, and then my eyesight was

602
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:38,240
Speaker 3: the boy and I said, tell me that I ain't

603
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:42,120
Speaker 3: tried to trow on me. And then the dudes because

604
00:29:42,120 --> 00:29:44,360
Speaker 3: I was popular, you know, I've always been kind of

605
00:29:44,400 --> 00:29:45,280
Speaker 3: a popular.

606
00:29:44,920 --> 00:29:45,440
Speaker 2: Girl, you.

607
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:47,320
Speaker 1: Know.

608
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:55,080
Speaker 3: I can tell you know, all the guys kind of

609
00:29:55,160 --> 00:29:58,360
Speaker 3: like they just went automatically into defense for me. And

610
00:29:58,520 --> 00:30:00,360
Speaker 3: it was a big brawl on the side of the lake.

611
00:30:00,960 --> 00:30:03,280
Speaker 3: We ended up having to pack up and we had

612
00:30:03,280 --> 00:30:05,320
Speaker 3: to leave. He was terminated that night.

613
00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:08,200
Speaker 2: So Waite, So you and Twin never talked about this

614
00:30:08,240 --> 00:30:10,240
Speaker 2: after that, y'all just went y'all separate ways.

615
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:13,000
Speaker 3: No, we were in job We was actually in job

616
00:30:13,040 --> 00:30:17,520
Speaker 3: corps together. I just don't re never burn any of that.

617
00:30:18,920 --> 00:30:21,720
Speaker 3: I just honestly don't. I can't tell you anything that

618
00:30:21,760 --> 00:30:26,480
Speaker 3: we talked about. I can't tell you I can't see

619
00:30:26,520 --> 00:30:29,440
Speaker 3: in my head, like like literally I'm sitting here trying

620
00:30:29,480 --> 00:30:32,320
Speaker 3: to go inside my head and look and see. I

621
00:30:32,320 --> 00:30:33,440
Speaker 3: can't see a conversation.

622
00:30:33,840 --> 00:30:35,440
Speaker 2: Do you remember why you'll stopped talking.

623
00:30:37,760 --> 00:30:39,800
Speaker 3: No, the only reason why we stopped talking is because

624
00:30:40,120 --> 00:30:41,640
Speaker 3: we moved to two that we was in two different

625
00:30:41,640 --> 00:30:44,440
Speaker 3: places in life. I ended up marrying the guy that

626
00:30:44,480 --> 00:30:46,760
Speaker 3: I was dating in job Corps was a guy that

627
00:30:46,840 --> 00:30:48,880
Speaker 3: I started dating in job Corps. We ended up getting

628
00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:52,800
Speaker 3: leaving job Corps together abruptly, so she was still there. Okay,

629
00:30:53,880 --> 00:30:59,920
Speaker 3: he got kicked, he got terminated, and I left with him. Okay,

630
00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,280
Speaker 3: he got terminated and I left with him. We went

631
00:31:03,320 --> 00:31:05,760
Speaker 3: to Kentucky, we got married, and then we started our life.

632
00:31:05,840 --> 00:31:11,000
Speaker 3: It wasn't until on the way from Kentucky to Atlanta, Georgia,

633
00:31:11,200 --> 00:31:13,640
Speaker 3: which is where we ended up moving to that I

634
00:31:13,680 --> 00:31:19,560
Speaker 3: saw Twin again. And that was maybe two maybe two,

635
00:31:21,760 --> 00:31:25,719
Speaker 3: two to three months after I left job Corps. She

636
00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 3: was she had left too, But I didn't know none

637
00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:29,760
Speaker 3: of this, you know what I mean. We talked on

638
00:31:29,800 --> 00:31:32,280
Speaker 3: the phone every now and again, but I don't even

639
00:31:32,280 --> 00:31:35,320
Speaker 3: remember the things that we talked about. I do know

640
00:31:35,400 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 3: that we ended up in Tennessee. We went through Tennessee, Nashville,

641
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,720
Speaker 3: to be exact. She did come up to the train station.

642
00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:46,200
Speaker 3: We sat across the street from the train station and

643
00:31:46,280 --> 00:31:49,000
Speaker 3: we smoked a couple of blunts during our little layover.

644
00:31:49,600 --> 00:31:51,880
Speaker 3: Then we got on we got on our bus. We

645
00:31:51,960 --> 00:31:54,840
Speaker 3: headed on to Atlanta. She got her car and went

646
00:31:54,880 --> 00:32:02,719
Speaker 3: on back home or wherever. Life for me took some

647
00:32:02,760 --> 00:32:06,480
Speaker 3: crazy turns. I ended up married. I also ended up

648
00:32:06,520 --> 00:32:10,880
Speaker 3: being in an abusive marriage. So life for me kind

649
00:32:10,880 --> 00:32:14,080
Speaker 3: of took some crazy turns. And when life take those

650
00:32:14,120 --> 00:32:16,160
Speaker 3: turns like that, you don't really want to talk to

651
00:32:16,160 --> 00:32:19,240
Speaker 3: people much because you don't want people to know your secrets.

652
00:32:20,040 --> 00:32:23,760
Speaker 3: People to know you know that you're going through what

653
00:32:23,800 --> 00:32:25,760
Speaker 3: you're going You're going through that kind of stuff.

654
00:32:25,960 --> 00:32:28,480
Speaker 2: That's my next question on how this surviving this incident

655
00:32:28,560 --> 00:32:31,800
Speaker 2: at such a young age shift your perspective on life.

656
00:32:33,240 --> 00:32:36,120
Speaker 3: Well, I experienced death as a nine year old girl,

657
00:32:36,200 --> 00:32:39,400
Speaker 3: so my perspective on life was already pretty much what

658
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 3: it was by then. You know. When I was nine

659
00:32:42,240 --> 00:32:44,880
Speaker 3: years old, my sister was the victim of a murdered suicide.

660
00:32:45,360 --> 00:32:49,440
Speaker 3: Her husband shot and killed her. He shot her five

661
00:32:49,480 --> 00:32:52,520
Speaker 3: times in her chest with her baby girl laying in

662
00:32:52,560 --> 00:32:56,080
Speaker 3: her arms, and then he went to their apartment and

663
00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:59,560
Speaker 3: he shot itself in the head. So I experienced that

664
00:32:59,600 --> 00:33:01,760
Speaker 3: at night at nine years old, I saw my sister

665
00:33:01,840 --> 00:33:04,400
Speaker 3: dead with bullet holes, you know what I mean. So

666
00:33:04,960 --> 00:33:08,760
Speaker 3: I experienced death on a very serious level at a

667
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:09,720
Speaker 3: very early age.

668
00:33:10,560 --> 00:33:12,400
Speaker 2: So and what happened to her daughter.

669
00:33:14,000 --> 00:33:17,000
Speaker 3: She they they got her out the house. She's living

670
00:33:17,040 --> 00:33:19,600
Speaker 3: well today, she has a daughter her own self. She

671
00:33:19,680 --> 00:33:22,960
Speaker 3: has a son as well. They're both grown up with

672
00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:27,760
Speaker 3: their children, you know, living their lives today. But yeah,

673
00:33:28,000 --> 00:33:31,720
Speaker 3: it ended up kind of crazy because his family, his mom,

674
00:33:31,880 --> 00:33:34,560
Speaker 3: she didn't even raise him, and she didn't even know

675
00:33:34,640 --> 00:33:38,040
Speaker 3: my niece and my nephew. But because their dad, because

676
00:33:38,040 --> 00:33:39,680
Speaker 3: my sister's husband want call him by his name, his

677
00:33:39,760 --> 00:33:43,440
Speaker 3: name was Jack, excuse me, because he was retired from

678
00:33:43,480 --> 00:33:47,080
Speaker 3: the military. She was just like, you know, we wasn't

679
00:33:47,120 --> 00:33:49,719
Speaker 3: gonna get the money, a son's money or whatever. So

680
00:33:49,760 --> 00:33:53,160
Speaker 3: they came. She was a woman who lived in Maryland,

681
00:33:53,200 --> 00:33:55,880
Speaker 3: and she was a foster mom. She had lots of

682
00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:59,560
Speaker 3: foster kids and stuff. So of course they sided with

683
00:33:59,600 --> 00:34:03,840
Speaker 3: her mom and dad, you know, older parents, nine children,

684
00:34:03,880 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. And then she's living up there.

685
00:34:07,800 --> 00:34:10,160
Speaker 3: She got a big old house, she got foster kids,

686
00:34:10,160 --> 00:34:11,480
Speaker 3: so you know that means she got money because you

687
00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:12,560
Speaker 3: get a check for each kids.

688
00:34:13,280 --> 00:34:14,879
Speaker 2: You know, that's a hustle right there.

689
00:34:15,160 --> 00:34:19,239
Speaker 3: Right, So they took the kids from us, and the

690
00:34:19,320 --> 00:34:24,480
Speaker 3: children was torn away from us like almost immediately and

691
00:34:25,080 --> 00:34:27,040
Speaker 3: given to them. We had my parents had to go

692
00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:30,839
Speaker 3: to court and all that stuff. It was. It was bad. Wow,

693
00:34:31,000 --> 00:34:33,720
Speaker 3: And I had to go through that at nine. Yeah.

694
00:34:34,960 --> 00:34:37,319
Speaker 2: My condolence is I can only imagine what that did

695
00:34:37,360 --> 00:34:40,360
Speaker 2: to you on your psyche as a as a child

696
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:41,160
Speaker 2: and alone a woman.

697
00:34:42,160 --> 00:34:47,120
Speaker 3: Yeah. So wow. Yeah.

698
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:48,959
Speaker 2: So when you think about stories like that or things

699
00:34:48,960 --> 00:34:51,759
Speaker 2: that you have witnessed, and then also you discovering the

700
00:34:51,800 --> 00:34:55,000
Speaker 2: history of Oscarville and the mini deaths that happened in

701
00:34:55,040 --> 00:34:57,399
Speaker 2: Lakeland near, do you ever have survivor skil.

702
00:35:00,160 --> 00:35:04,160
Speaker 3: I'm not gonna say I have survivor's guilt because it's

703
00:35:04,200 --> 00:35:09,920
Speaker 3: God's plan and everything, but I do get emotional, like

704
00:35:10,040 --> 00:35:15,440
Speaker 3: right now, these excuse me. I do get emotional because

705
00:35:15,560 --> 00:35:18,800
Speaker 3: it's the question of why me? And then you understand

706
00:35:18,800 --> 00:35:23,200
Speaker 3: why you one day because you're bold enough to say it, Well,

707
00:35:23,239 --> 00:35:25,399
Speaker 3: most people probably wouldn't say it, you know what I'm saying.

708
00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:27,279
Speaker 3: I'm bold enough to say it. I've always known that

709
00:35:27,320 --> 00:35:30,879
Speaker 3: I'm going to say something in life and it's gonna

710
00:35:30,880 --> 00:35:32,560
Speaker 3: be people that's gonna get mad at me for it.

711
00:35:32,760 --> 00:35:35,359
Speaker 3: I've never known. I didn't know exactly what that that

712
00:35:35,480 --> 00:35:39,160
Speaker 3: was going to be, but I've always been the misfit.

713
00:35:39,320 --> 00:35:42,600
Speaker 3: So it ain't never came hard to me. To me

714
00:35:43,640 --> 00:35:47,640
Speaker 3: to say the thing that other people won't say, That's

715
00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:50,399
Speaker 3: always been pretty easy for me. But I'm not gonna

716
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:54,480
Speaker 3: say any that I have survivors remorse because I feel

717
00:35:54,560 --> 00:35:56,560
Speaker 3: like I'm supposed to be here. I feel like I

718
00:35:56,560 --> 00:35:59,880
Speaker 3: would say for a reason, I have four of you

719
00:36:00,080 --> 00:36:03,640
Speaker 3: for children, I have my sons. He's twenty six. I

720
00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:06,360
Speaker 3: for twelve years I could not carry a baby past

721
00:36:06,520 --> 00:36:11,879
Speaker 3: two months, so lost. I had fourteen minutecarriages. Oh wow,

722
00:36:11,800 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 3: tooble pregnancies, all with my husband. And uh then after

723
00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:20,880
Speaker 3: that I had three children back to back. Mmm. So

724
00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:23,680
Speaker 3: I've always defied the odds when it came to a

725
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:28,320
Speaker 3: lot of things in my life. I've always been a

726
00:36:28,520 --> 00:36:32,280
Speaker 3: picture of what the definition of to find the odds

727
00:36:32,320 --> 00:36:32,640
Speaker 3: would be.

728
00:36:33,120 --> 00:36:35,480
Speaker 2: Shod You got my eyes wandering up. Listen, We've been

729
00:36:35,560 --> 00:36:37,959
Speaker 2: talking like since yesterday. She was like, we talk about

730
00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:39,000
Speaker 2: any and everything, just.

731
00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:40,480
Speaker 1: Right.

732
00:36:40,680 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 3: Yes, I'm an open book.

733
00:36:42,760 --> 00:36:46,560
Speaker 2: Wow my god, what a what a what a story?

734
00:36:46,600 --> 00:36:50,600
Speaker 2: What a life? Yeah? Man, you definitely to put this

735
00:36:50,680 --> 00:36:51,400
Speaker 2: a pin of paper.

736
00:36:52,520 --> 00:36:57,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, if only I uh, I gonna say new how

737
00:37:00,600 --> 00:37:02,960
Speaker 3: sometimes it takes people to show you the ropes to

738
00:37:03,040 --> 00:37:05,720
Speaker 3: different stuff or to encourage you to do different stuff.

739
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:09,480
Speaker 3: I didn't even know that people would even be interested

740
00:37:09,520 --> 00:37:11,520
Speaker 3: in lit on me.

741
00:37:12,120 --> 00:37:16,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, you got your little sister here, So i'm'a

742
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:18,080
Speaker 2: definitely keep in contact with you. And then I have

743
00:37:18,120 --> 00:37:19,719
Speaker 2: some couple of things I've been working on that I'm

744
00:37:19,719 --> 00:37:21,560
Speaker 2: gonna definitely include you in so we can get your

745
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:25,520
Speaker 2: story out there. I mean, just some experience. Fourteen miscarriages,

746
00:37:25,560 --> 00:37:28,960
Speaker 2: let alone, like to have your faith not on waiverybody.

747
00:37:28,960 --> 00:37:30,800
Speaker 2: That speaks a lot about who you are as a woman.

748
00:37:30,880 --> 00:37:32,640
Speaker 2: So and I think a lot of women can relate

749
00:37:32,680 --> 00:37:34,720
Speaker 2: to that, because especially when you really want a baby.

750
00:37:34,800 --> 00:37:39,000
Speaker 3: So, yeah, I lot sixteen babies in all. Yeah, well,

751
00:37:39,520 --> 00:37:43,040
Speaker 3: well seventeen because to tell my story, I have to

752
00:37:43,040 --> 00:37:45,920
Speaker 3: tell the true story. My first time having six when

753
00:37:45,920 --> 00:37:49,040
Speaker 3: I was fifteen, I got pregnant and I didn't have

754
00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:52,080
Speaker 3: the baby. I didn't have abortion or anything like that.

755
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:55,399
Speaker 3: I was pretty I pretty much got a whooping and

756
00:37:57,920 --> 00:38:01,680
Speaker 3: it resulted in me not having a baby, right right,

757
00:38:01,800 --> 00:38:06,839
Speaker 3: So I ended up losing the baby. But yeah, I've

758
00:38:06,920 --> 00:38:13,120
Speaker 3: had actually fifteen miscarriages and two tuber pregnancies, and I

759
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:16,399
Speaker 3: had my last three children off of one two. After

760
00:38:16,440 --> 00:38:18,200
Speaker 3: the doctors told me that I would never be like

761
00:38:18,440 --> 00:38:20,840
Speaker 3: So that's for anybody who the doctor ever said that to.

762
00:38:21,480 --> 00:38:22,920
Speaker 3: After the doctor told me that I would never be

763
00:38:23,000 --> 00:38:26,759
Speaker 3: like a normal woman, my chances of having babies were

764
00:38:26,760 --> 00:38:29,000
Speaker 3: cut in half, so I would never be like a

765
00:38:29,040 --> 00:38:31,120
Speaker 3: normal woman. Again. It's where I was told that I

766
00:38:31,120 --> 00:38:34,279
Speaker 3: should just have a hysterectomy and just leave it alone.

767
00:38:34,440 --> 00:38:37,160
Speaker 3: But I knew what God showed me in my dream.

768
00:38:37,200 --> 00:38:38,920
Speaker 3: When I was pregnant with my big son, I had

769
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:42,640
Speaker 3: a dream and in the dream I had him, which

770
00:38:42,680 --> 00:38:45,040
Speaker 3: for some reason, I knew that the big boy beside

771
00:38:45,080 --> 00:38:47,400
Speaker 3: me in the car was the baby and my belly

772
00:38:48,080 --> 00:38:49,839
Speaker 3: some kind of way in the dream, I was aware

773
00:38:49,880 --> 00:38:51,960
Speaker 3: of that. And then the three children that was in

774
00:38:52,000 --> 00:38:54,360
Speaker 3: the back seat, I couldn't see their faces, but I

775
00:38:54,360 --> 00:38:57,360
Speaker 3: could see that two children was like the same size,

776
00:38:57,400 --> 00:38:59,239
Speaker 3: one was a little darker than the other one. And

777
00:38:59,239 --> 00:39:01,480
Speaker 3: then there was another little boy who was well, I

778
00:39:01,480 --> 00:39:02,719
Speaker 3: didn't know if he think he was a little boy,

779
00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:06,200
Speaker 3: but he's a little boy. Another child that was brighter

780
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:08,440
Speaker 3: than all all the children that was in the car.

781
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,240
Speaker 3: It was a Latin. They all had hit full of hair. Okay,

782
00:39:11,360 --> 00:39:13,600
Speaker 3: so I have my ten year old son who he

783
00:39:13,719 --> 00:39:16,759
Speaker 3: just turned ten October thirty. First, I have promise in

784
00:39:16,920 --> 00:39:21,280
Speaker 3: Zion who promised birthday is actually tomorrow. Zion's birthday is Thursday.

785
00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:23,600
Speaker 3: Those are the two little twins he is. There are

786
00:39:23,640 --> 00:39:26,120
Speaker 3: my Irish twins. And then I have my twenty six

787
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:29,319
Speaker 3: year old son and he just turned twenty six back

788
00:39:29,320 --> 00:39:31,360
Speaker 3: in October as well. I have two kids, two children

789
00:39:31,360 --> 00:39:35,920
Speaker 3: in October, two children in January. But I was told

790
00:39:35,960 --> 00:39:40,600
Speaker 3: that after I had my big son that and after

791
00:39:40,680 --> 00:39:43,520
Speaker 3: I had especially after they took my two, they told

792
00:39:43,560 --> 00:39:46,440
Speaker 3: me that I would never be like a normal woman

793
00:39:46,440 --> 00:39:49,560
Speaker 3: again and my chances of having children couldn't have. Twelve

794
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:51,680
Speaker 3: years later, I had three babies back to back.

795
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:54,959
Speaker 2: Wow, you can't tell me God ain't real.

796
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,680
Speaker 3: He is, and you can't tell me he don't have

797
00:39:57,719 --> 00:39:58,680
Speaker 3: a sense of humor either.

798
00:39:58,920 --> 00:40:01,040
Speaker 2: Oh real funny.

799
00:40:01,160 --> 00:40:03,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can't tell me he don't have a sense

800
00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:05,759
Speaker 3: of humor because you don't wait to time. I'm thirty five,

801
00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:10,239
Speaker 3: thirty six and thirty eight. He needs a baby, but

802
00:40:10,320 --> 00:40:11,319
Speaker 3: he knew what he was doing.

803
00:40:21,040 --> 00:40:22,960
Speaker 2: So ever, so everything you have been through, do you

804
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:26,440
Speaker 2: know what your purpose is in life? Have you discovered

805
00:40:26,440 --> 00:40:26,799
Speaker 2: that yet.

806
00:40:27,760 --> 00:40:31,239
Speaker 3: Okay, so it's gonna my my friends tell me that

807
00:40:31,719 --> 00:40:34,520
Speaker 3: it's not this simple, but for me, it's just this simple.

808
00:40:34,920 --> 00:40:39,200
Speaker 3: This is my purpose in life to do what Spirit,

809
00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:44,040
Speaker 3: God the most high, which you want to make us

810
00:40:44,040 --> 00:40:47,239
Speaker 3: a person, everybody feel more comfortable. Whatever he tells me

811
00:40:47,320 --> 00:40:50,120
Speaker 3: to do when he tells me to do it for

812
00:40:50,239 --> 00:40:53,719
Speaker 3: whom he tells me to do it for. Whenever he

813
00:40:54,080 --> 00:40:56,399
Speaker 3: say whatever he tells me to say, when he tells

814
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:58,239
Speaker 3: me to say it to whomever he tells me to

815
00:40:58,239 --> 00:41:02,160
Speaker 3: say it to. I think that's my person purpose. I

816
00:41:02,200 --> 00:41:06,840
Speaker 3: think that's my purpose, to be somebody that's gonna be straightforward,

817
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:12,080
Speaker 3: somebody who's not gonna tell you a lie, Somebody who's

818
00:41:12,120 --> 00:41:15,759
Speaker 3: not gonna sugarcoat the truth. Somebody who you can come

819
00:41:15,800 --> 00:41:20,839
Speaker 3: to unapologetically, you know, and talk to about whatever. I'm

820
00:41:20,840 --> 00:41:23,080
Speaker 3: gonna listen to you. I'm a great listener, you know

821
00:41:23,120 --> 00:41:25,560
Speaker 3: what I mean. If it's something that I can internally,

822
00:41:25,560 --> 00:41:27,560
Speaker 3: if it's something that I can take in, internalize and

823
00:41:27,600 --> 00:41:29,719
Speaker 3: shot back out to you in this way. Well, Hey,

824
00:41:30,040 --> 00:41:33,400
Speaker 3: you know, I'm a glass half full person, never a

825
00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:36,319
Speaker 3: glass half empty person. So I'm gonna always find a

826
00:41:36,320 --> 00:41:40,120
Speaker 3: bright side to no matter what it is. Most people

827
00:41:40,160 --> 00:41:44,040
Speaker 3: say why mean, I say, why not me? Yeah, yeah,

828
00:41:44,040 --> 00:41:48,040
Speaker 3: So I don't I don't know. I know, I've had

829
00:41:48,120 --> 00:41:52,719
Speaker 3: dreams of speaking to people before. I've had dreams of

830
00:41:52,760 --> 00:41:55,880
Speaker 3: standing up on stage and talking to lots of people.

831
00:41:56,840 --> 00:42:00,000
Speaker 3: I've had I've had you can maybe call them visions.

832
00:42:00,080 --> 00:42:03,480
Speaker 3: I don't know, but I've had dreams of stuff like that,

833
00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:06,640
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. But I'm not readily a

834
00:42:06,680 --> 00:42:10,520
Speaker 3: person that just I'm a person that plays the background.

835
00:42:10,800 --> 00:42:13,120
Speaker 3: I'm not a force type of person. I'm sitting it

836
00:42:13,160 --> 00:42:17,280
Speaker 3: back and just kind of like if I do right,

837
00:42:17,480 --> 00:42:19,839
Speaker 3: and anything that I do, I'm not trying to bring

838
00:42:19,920 --> 00:42:22,040
Speaker 3: light to the fact that I did that right. You

839
00:42:22,080 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 3: know what I mean. I'm gonna do it from my

840
00:42:24,200 --> 00:42:26,799
Speaker 3: heart because that's what my heart said do. But you

841
00:42:26,800 --> 00:42:28,840
Speaker 3: don't owe me nothing for that. Give God the glory,

842
00:42:28,920 --> 00:42:30,640
Speaker 3: give him thanks, tell him. Think you ain't got to

843
00:42:30,680 --> 00:42:32,319
Speaker 3: tell me nothing, because if it was of me, I

844
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:33,759
Speaker 3: probably want to dead it, you know what I mean.

845
00:42:33,760 --> 00:42:35,160
Speaker 3: That's just how I feel about it, you know what

846
00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:37,640
Speaker 3: I mean. So I feel like I'm here to be

847
00:42:37,640 --> 00:42:39,320
Speaker 3: obedient to what the spirit of God saying.

848
00:42:39,120 --> 00:42:41,880
Speaker 2: When he says, when he say it right, you know,

849
00:42:42,040 --> 00:42:44,799
Speaker 2: being at this you surviving Lake Lanar in nineteen ninety seven.

850
00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:47,680
Speaker 2: Here we are in twenty twenty five, and you saying

851
00:42:47,680 --> 00:42:49,759
Speaker 2: that you just you know, learned about the history a

852
00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:52,719
Speaker 2: couple of years ago. Did that help you rediscover your

853
00:42:52,800 --> 00:42:54,680
Speaker 2: understanding what your relationship with God?

854
00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:02,040
Speaker 3: Well? It helped me to, oh, can I want to

855
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:05,520
Speaker 3: say it right? It helped me to know that when

856
00:43:05,560 --> 00:43:11,279
Speaker 3: he's speaking to me, to not to not waiver from that,

857
00:43:11,719 --> 00:43:13,360
Speaker 3: to not say, well, no, I ain't really hear that,

858
00:43:14,000 --> 00:43:17,920
Speaker 3: or to say or not to say you know, oh,

859
00:43:18,000 --> 00:43:20,400
Speaker 3: that's just me, you know what I mean. Like sometimes

860
00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:24,120
Speaker 3: I discredit myself and I'll be like, well, in the past,

861
00:43:24,160 --> 00:43:26,560
Speaker 3: I've just credited myself. I would hear God say certain

862
00:43:26,560 --> 00:43:30,160
Speaker 3: things and I wouldn't move on him just because I'd

863
00:43:30,160 --> 00:43:32,480
Speaker 3: be like, what if that's me? Because you know, I've

864
00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:34,239
Speaker 3: been told before that I was schizophrantic, you know what

865
00:43:34,239 --> 00:43:36,120
Speaker 3: I'm saying. So I'm like, Okay, what if that's just me?

866
00:43:36,719 --> 00:43:39,160
Speaker 3: You know what I'm saying. So I don't want to

867
00:43:40,080 --> 00:43:44,359
Speaker 3: in any way say something that I'm not supposed to say,

868
00:43:44,440 --> 00:43:46,120
Speaker 3: or do something that I'm not supposed to be doing.

869
00:43:46,239 --> 00:43:48,520
Speaker 3: Like I don't know how to explain it. But I've

870
00:43:48,560 --> 00:43:51,200
Speaker 3: always had these core values within myself, my mother and

871
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:54,399
Speaker 3: my father's older parents. My mom is eighty three years old.

872
00:43:56,239 --> 00:43:58,040
Speaker 3: I have two sets of brothers and sisters. I have

873
00:43:58,080 --> 00:44:01,319
Speaker 3: a set that's in their late fifth fifties to sixties.

874
00:44:01,680 --> 00:44:05,600
Speaker 3: And then my brother Max, he just turned I think fifty.

875
00:44:05,680 --> 00:44:07,440
Speaker 3: I'm forty eight. I'm gonna be forty nine. He's two

876
00:44:07,480 --> 00:44:09,239
Speaker 3: years older than me, so I think he's like fifty one.

877
00:44:10,239 --> 00:44:12,000
Speaker 3: And then I'm forty eight. And then I have a

878
00:44:12,040 --> 00:44:14,600
Speaker 3: sister that's forty seven. And then I have a sister

879
00:44:14,640 --> 00:44:16,560
Speaker 3: that's five years younger than her. You know what I mean.

880
00:44:16,719 --> 00:44:18,799
Speaker 3: It's like two we had two sets of kids. My

881
00:44:18,800 --> 00:44:22,920
Speaker 3: mom had two sets of kids. But I don't know.

882
00:44:23,280 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 3: I just I get confused sometimes. So I'm not the

883
00:44:27,960 --> 00:44:30,400
Speaker 3: I don't readily like to talk to people. I'm just

884
00:44:30,400 --> 00:44:32,200
Speaker 3: gonna be very honest with you about that. I talk

885
00:44:32,239 --> 00:44:34,200
Speaker 3: to my friends, my family members and stuff like that,

886
00:44:34,320 --> 00:44:37,200
Speaker 3: the people that know me that I'm used to. But

887
00:44:37,360 --> 00:44:40,640
Speaker 3: I'm not a big people I'm not gonna say I'm

888
00:44:40,640 --> 00:44:42,760
Speaker 3: not a people person because I can deal with people,

889
00:44:44,239 --> 00:44:50,560
Speaker 3: you mean, because I stuttered sometime, and I can be

890
00:44:50,600 --> 00:44:53,040
Speaker 3: trying to say something one way and it don't come

891
00:44:53,040 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 3: out that way. It may come out sometimes and sometimes

892
00:44:55,560 --> 00:44:58,120
Speaker 3: my words may seem a little harsh sometimes, like I

893
00:44:58,120 --> 00:44:59,800
Speaker 3: have to pray about the way that I say stuff.

894
00:45:00,080 --> 00:45:02,200
Speaker 3: Like sometimes people think that I'm upset when I'm not upset.

895
00:45:02,200 --> 00:45:03,640
Speaker 3: I'm just passionate about what I'm saying.

896
00:45:03,640 --> 00:45:04,319
Speaker 2: Me too, I'm not.

897
00:45:04,760 --> 00:45:08,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm not yelling. I'm I'm just passionate about I'm

898
00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:13,800
Speaker 3: a very passionate person. April fourth, okay.

899
00:45:13,400 --> 00:45:17,000
Speaker 2: Okay, because mine is coming up in February. I'm very passionate.

900
00:45:17,040 --> 00:45:19,160
Speaker 2: Like I had to really work on my delivery because

901
00:45:19,200 --> 00:45:20,760
Speaker 2: I'm just a straight shooter.

902
00:45:21,880 --> 00:45:26,040
Speaker 3: Yeah man, yeah, yeah, So you get looked at a

903
00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:28,920
Speaker 3: little weird at times growing up, you know, as a

904
00:45:29,520 --> 00:45:31,840
Speaker 3: you know, growing up, I was, like I said, considered

905
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:36,239
Speaker 3: the misfit or the My mom will say I was

906
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:39,640
Speaker 3: very very very very very outspoken. She will tell you

907
00:45:39,680 --> 00:45:42,399
Speaker 3: that I wasn't a bad child, but some other people

908
00:45:42,480 --> 00:45:43,960
Speaker 3: might say I was bad, you know what I mean,

909
00:45:44,560 --> 00:45:46,600
Speaker 3: because I was the child that would say the stuff

910
00:45:46,640 --> 00:45:51,280
Speaker 3: that everybody thinking, but won't nobody say, right, It never

911
00:45:51,560 --> 00:45:54,520
Speaker 3: was a problem for me just to say it.

912
00:45:55,360 --> 00:45:57,600
Speaker 2: So what would you say to someone who has lost

913
00:45:57,640 --> 00:46:00,440
Speaker 2: faith after facing a life threatening situation, and because I

914
00:46:00,480 --> 00:46:02,360
Speaker 2: feel like you have been through so much but you

915
00:46:02,440 --> 00:46:07,279
Speaker 2: still love and know who God is, I.

916
00:46:07,200 --> 00:46:11,440
Speaker 3: Would say, first of all, you have to have the

917
00:46:11,520 --> 00:46:15,959
Speaker 3: mind of why not me instead of why me? See,

918
00:46:15,960 --> 00:46:18,919
Speaker 3: when I had my first miscarriage, I called my big

919
00:46:18,960 --> 00:46:21,600
Speaker 3: sister on the phone and I share this story because

920
00:46:21,960 --> 00:46:24,959
Speaker 3: this is how I make This is how I've made

921
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:30,400
Speaker 3: it through every tragedy in my life since then. I

922
00:46:30,440 --> 00:46:33,480
Speaker 3: called my sister. I was crying. I said, Cynthia, I

923
00:46:33,520 --> 00:46:36,400
Speaker 3: lost the baby. She began to pray for me, and

924
00:46:36,480 --> 00:46:38,879
Speaker 3: she was long when her pressure it was like, God,

925
00:46:39,320 --> 00:46:43,480
Speaker 3: thank you for seeing Chad faithful to be able to

926
00:46:43,560 --> 00:46:48,719
Speaker 3: go through this situation and still love you. I was

927
00:46:48,760 --> 00:46:52,000
Speaker 3: twenty one years twenty two years old when she prayed

928
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:56,200
Speaker 3: that over me. When she prayed that prayer. So since

929
00:46:56,200 --> 00:47:00,000
Speaker 3: I was twenty two, I've always said God, thank you

930
00:47:00,920 --> 00:47:03,399
Speaker 3: for showing me faithful to be able to go through

931
00:47:03,400 --> 00:47:07,719
Speaker 3: whatever this is and still worship you, still praise you,

932
00:47:07,760 --> 00:47:10,839
Speaker 3: and still tell people how good you are. So I've

933
00:47:10,840 --> 00:47:13,279
Speaker 3: always taken all the things that I've been through in

934
00:47:13,320 --> 00:47:15,279
Speaker 3: my life. I've never really looked at it like it

935
00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:18,040
Speaker 3: was about me. If I can just be honest, I've

936
00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:21,600
Speaker 3: always looked at it as if there's gonna be somebody

937
00:47:21,719 --> 00:47:24,160
Speaker 3: at some point in my life that I'm going to meet,

938
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:27,640
Speaker 3: and the only person that can tell them how to

939
00:47:27,680 --> 00:47:30,279
Speaker 3: get past whatever that thing is or whatever that hurt

940
00:47:30,400 --> 00:47:33,480
Speaker 3: is or whatever that situation is would be me. Because

941
00:47:33,520 --> 00:47:36,560
Speaker 3: I went through it. I'm one of those people that

942
00:47:36,600 --> 00:47:38,480
Speaker 3: you can't just tell me nothing. If you don't know nobody.

943
00:47:38,560 --> 00:47:40,000
Speaker 3: You can't just tell me. You can't tell me what

944
00:47:40,080 --> 00:47:42,919
Speaker 3: somebody else told. You can't tell me somebody else store.

945
00:47:42,920 --> 00:47:45,040
Speaker 3: You gotta tell me what you know, you know what

946
00:47:45,120 --> 00:47:48,080
Speaker 3: I mean. So because I'm that type of person, you know,

947
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:51,960
Speaker 3: I'm that type of person for other people too. So

948
00:47:52,080 --> 00:47:59,080
Speaker 3: I just think that I would say, if you made

949
00:47:59,080 --> 00:48:02,799
Speaker 3: it through it, if he brought you through it, he

950
00:48:02,920 --> 00:48:06,280
Speaker 3: gonna take you to it whatever it is that you desire,

951
00:48:06,920 --> 00:48:11,120
Speaker 3: if you just hold on and believe and trust that

952
00:48:11,280 --> 00:48:16,080
Speaker 3: we don't know everything. But there is some people, Hey, listen,

953
00:48:16,239 --> 00:48:18,120
Speaker 3: in the Bible. If you believe in the Bible. It's

954
00:48:18,120 --> 00:48:19,880
Speaker 3: some people that don't even believe in the Bible. But

955
00:48:19,880 --> 00:48:21,600
Speaker 3: if you believe in the Bible, there's a big g

956
00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:25,359
Speaker 3: and then there's little g's to sum that all up.

957
00:48:25,360 --> 00:48:28,160
Speaker 3: I work with the big G, none of the little g's.

958
00:48:28,560 --> 00:48:30,360
Speaker 3: And if you work with the big G, you know

959
00:48:30,440 --> 00:48:32,600
Speaker 3: what I'm saying, and you listen to the big G.

960
00:48:33,239 --> 00:48:36,120
Speaker 3: Big G will lead you everywhere that you need to

961
00:48:36,160 --> 00:48:38,040
Speaker 3: go through, everything that you need to go through, no

962
00:48:38,040 --> 00:48:40,319
Speaker 3: matter how hard it is. You just gotta stay in

963
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:42,879
Speaker 3: your mind and stay in your mind and say it's

964
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:46,799
Speaker 3: almost like coaching yourself, encouraging yourself. You have to coach

965
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:49,960
Speaker 3: yourself through it. Sometimes people can't tell you. Sometimes people

966
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:54,520
Speaker 3: can't tell you nothing. But I been through something so

967
00:48:55,719 --> 00:48:59,560
Speaker 3: and I don't readily just volunteer my stuff, you know

968
00:48:59,600 --> 00:49:03,800
Speaker 3: what I mean. The only reason why social media I

969
00:49:03,800 --> 00:49:05,600
Speaker 3: got to hear my story is because of my daughter.

970
00:49:06,760 --> 00:49:08,959
Speaker 3: If it wasn't for my daughter, I would have never

971
00:49:09,000 --> 00:49:13,000
Speaker 3: shared that. All credit goes to my daughter. Promise for that,

972
00:49:13,000 --> 00:49:18,479
Speaker 3: her name is promised. All credit other than God. God

973
00:49:18,560 --> 00:49:22,400
Speaker 3: first did my daughter. Because when I saw the TikTok

974
00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:25,279
Speaker 3: with the bottom of the it just stirred something up

975
00:49:25,320 --> 00:49:28,200
Speaker 3: in me and I was like, oh, promise it did

976
00:49:28,239 --> 00:49:30,440
Speaker 3: something to me. I was like, promise that was that's

977
00:49:30,480 --> 00:49:32,960
Speaker 3: what was down there. And so graves and all that stuff.

978
00:49:32,960 --> 00:49:34,920
Speaker 3: I had no clue all that stuff was down there.

979
00:49:35,680 --> 00:49:38,680
Speaker 3: I had no clue. And my daughter was like, Mom,

980
00:49:39,200 --> 00:49:41,279
Speaker 3: say something, and I was like, no, I promise, I'm

981
00:49:41,280 --> 00:49:43,359
Speaker 3: not gonna say nothing. Because I'm kind. I can talk

982
00:49:43,400 --> 00:49:46,719
Speaker 3: a lot to the people I talked to, but to

983
00:49:46,840 --> 00:49:48,880
Speaker 3: the people that I don't talk to, it's like I

984
00:49:48,880 --> 00:49:51,040
Speaker 3: don't talk. It's like I'm a mute, you know, I just.

985
00:49:52,880 --> 00:49:53,080
Speaker 1: Right.

986
00:49:53,560 --> 00:49:56,160
Speaker 3: So she was like, Mom, says something, and I was like, no, promise,

987
00:49:56,160 --> 00:49:59,560
Speaker 3: is not gonna say She's like, Mom, say something, and

988
00:49:59,600 --> 00:50:01,560
Speaker 3: I did. And then that's when people wanted to know

989
00:50:01,680 --> 00:50:04,080
Speaker 3: my story. So I gave it to him. And then

990
00:50:04,200 --> 00:50:07,319
Speaker 3: God told me that morning before I did surviving, likely

991
00:50:07,440 --> 00:50:11,080
Speaker 3: near nineteen ninety seven, I was in my shower and

992
00:50:11,120 --> 00:50:12,800
Speaker 3: my daughter was like, Mama, you're gonna do a story

993
00:50:12,840 --> 00:50:15,000
Speaker 3: time and I was like, yeah, I'm gonna do well.

994
00:50:15,040 --> 00:50:17,400
Speaker 3: And I just don't know when. And I was in

995
00:50:17,400 --> 00:50:21,200
Speaker 3: the shower. And all my life, I've had dreams and

996
00:50:21,320 --> 00:50:27,240
Speaker 3: visions of this certain life right of a certain life,

997
00:50:27,600 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 3: and I have not ever yet. I'm forty eight years

998
00:50:30,600 --> 00:50:33,319
Speaker 3: old and I've had a good life, but I have

999
00:50:33,440 --> 00:50:37,920
Speaker 3: not touched the surface of what I've dreamed yet. So

1000
00:50:37,960 --> 00:50:40,080
Speaker 3: when I was in the shower, I started praying and

1001
00:50:40,080 --> 00:50:42,440
Speaker 3: I was just like, you know, lord, you know how

1002
00:50:42,480 --> 00:50:45,520
Speaker 3: I am. People get on social media, and then social

1003
00:50:45,600 --> 00:50:47,759
Speaker 3: media the world just tear them apart. You know what

1004
00:50:47,800 --> 00:50:52,960
Speaker 3: I'm saying. And I'm strong, but I'm sensitive too, so yeah,

1005
00:50:53,080 --> 00:50:55,960
Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying. So I was like, you

1006
00:50:56,000 --> 00:50:58,279
Speaker 3: know what am I supposed to do? And I heard

1007
00:50:58,280 --> 00:51:01,400
Speaker 3: this voice say it sounds just like me. But I

1008
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:05,480
Speaker 3: heard the boy say, remember the life that you dream

1009
00:51:05,520 --> 00:51:07,839
Speaker 3: about and you always wonder how you gonna get there?

1010
00:51:09,080 --> 00:51:11,920
Speaker 3: And I was like, yeah, I'm talking talking just like this,

1011
00:51:12,400 --> 00:51:15,040
Speaker 3: like I'm talking to you. I was like yeah, and

1012
00:51:15,080 --> 00:51:16,959
Speaker 3: the boy said, this is how you're gonna get there.

1013
00:51:17,760 --> 00:51:20,720
Speaker 3: And I was like, okay. I got out the shower.

1014
00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:23,560
Speaker 3: If you look and then put on any makeup or anything,

1015
00:51:23,600 --> 00:51:26,280
Speaker 3: I'm actually sitting in the bathroom. I got out the shower,

1016
00:51:26,280 --> 00:51:28,600
Speaker 3: I put on a dress, I sat down on a toilet,

1017
00:51:28,880 --> 00:51:31,280
Speaker 3: and I pushed myself to just get it out. Yeah

1018
00:51:31,360 --> 00:51:34,120
Speaker 3: right there there. You know what I mean, Well, tell me.

1019
00:51:34,080 --> 00:51:36,359
Speaker 2: That you did, because I feel like, like I said,

1020
00:51:36,360 --> 00:51:39,160
Speaker 2: I've been trying to have this conversation with a survivor

1021
00:51:39,200 --> 00:51:41,640
Speaker 2: for many years of a person who survived like Lanair.

1022
00:51:42,000 --> 00:51:45,560
Speaker 2: And honestly, my podcast is for women of color, and

1023
00:51:46,440 --> 00:51:48,239
Speaker 2: I cannot you were the only person I found that

1024
00:51:48,320 --> 00:51:49,719
Speaker 2: was a black woman that was willing to share her

1025
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:51,719
Speaker 2: story or that has that has shared her story. I

1026
00:51:51,719 --> 00:51:54,319
Speaker 2: have not found any other person of color that has

1027
00:51:54,320 --> 00:51:57,000
Speaker 2: shared their story when it comes to surviving like Lanir.

1028
00:51:57,080 --> 00:51:58,399
Speaker 2: And I'm pretty sure they out there.

1029
00:51:59,160 --> 00:52:02,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, well, I hope they come forward, I mean, and

1030
00:52:02,880 --> 00:52:07,120
Speaker 3: and talk about it, because actually it's actually been very therapeutic.

1031
00:52:07,600 --> 00:52:09,920
Speaker 3: Yeah for me, it's been healing for.

1032
00:52:10,000 --> 00:52:16,240
Speaker 2: Me right right, Yeah, I can imagine.

1033
00:52:16,320 --> 00:52:20,880
Speaker 3: I can't say anything. And even with the little in

1034
00:52:21,040 --> 00:52:22,799
Speaker 3: boxes and stuff, you know what I mean, the little

1035
00:52:22,840 --> 00:52:26,160
Speaker 3: incidents that's been going on, a little stupid stuff, that's

1036
00:52:26,239 --> 00:52:28,040
Speaker 3: just God moving me on to a better place in

1037
00:52:28,040 --> 00:52:29,680
Speaker 3: the first place, you know what I mean. My kids

1038
00:52:29,840 --> 00:52:32,480
Speaker 3: they have to go through it because when my husband

1039
00:52:32,480 --> 00:52:35,360
Speaker 3: passed away, I kind of like freaked out because I

1040
00:52:35,360 --> 00:52:37,880
Speaker 3: was like, oh Lord, what I mean, what am I

1041
00:52:37,880 --> 00:52:40,319
Speaker 3: gonna do? Okay, I gotta i gotta figure this out.

1042
00:52:40,480 --> 00:52:42,879
Speaker 3: We lived over in a condo over here, and I'm

1043
00:52:42,920 --> 00:52:46,000
Speaker 3: just like, Okay, the people who work in a condo.

1044
00:52:46,200 --> 00:52:48,160
Speaker 3: I don't like these people, and Lord, I gotta figure

1045
00:52:48,160 --> 00:52:51,600
Speaker 3: out something. So I came out here with his it's

1046
00:52:51,600 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 3: manufactured homes and they're they're not for rent, they're all

1047
00:52:55,160 --> 00:52:59,280
Speaker 3: for sale. So I got one. My my grand baby

1048
00:52:59,320 --> 00:53:02,480
Speaker 3: was being born, we all moved over there. And then

1049
00:53:02,640 --> 00:53:06,319
Speaker 3: the situation where my husband happened, I'm just like freaked out.

1050
00:53:06,360 --> 00:53:07,759
Speaker 3: So I'm like, okay, okay, I got to try to

1051
00:53:07,920 --> 00:53:11,560
Speaker 3: own something so if something happens to me, people will

1052
00:53:11,600 --> 00:53:14,360
Speaker 3: want to raise my children. I gotta have something to

1053
00:53:14,440 --> 00:53:16,759
Speaker 3: make them want my children, you know what I mean,

1054
00:53:16,960 --> 00:53:19,239
Speaker 3: Because ain't nobody readily from what I seen when my

1055
00:53:19,280 --> 00:53:22,520
Speaker 3: sister past, when my sister was murdered and her husband

1056
00:53:22,600 --> 00:53:26,240
Speaker 3: killed himself, people ain't really just trying to take in children,

1057
00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:30,799
Speaker 3: you know what I mean, getting no check right and

1058
00:53:30,800 --> 00:53:32,840
Speaker 3: then especially if you got your own children, you know

1059
00:53:32,880 --> 00:53:34,560
Speaker 3: what I mean. So I was like, okay, So I

1060
00:53:34,560 --> 00:53:37,920
Speaker 3: got to create a way so that if something happens

1061
00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:39,719
Speaker 3: to me, my children always got a place to live.

1062
00:53:40,160 --> 00:53:44,279
Speaker 3: So I got two manufactured homes. You know that. I

1063
00:53:44,360 --> 00:53:48,799
Speaker 3: have my granddaughter and her mom brother. They live in one.

1064
00:53:49,000 --> 00:53:51,759
Speaker 3: They're paying that one off. I live over here. I'm

1065
00:53:51,760 --> 00:53:54,120
Speaker 3: paying this one off. I'm looking for a place to

1066
00:53:54,160 --> 00:53:56,040
Speaker 3: move so that my son and his wife, because my

1067
00:53:56,080 --> 00:54:00,360
Speaker 3: son just got married, him and his wife and girls

1068
00:54:00,400 --> 00:54:03,000
Speaker 3: can move over here. And I'm gonna take my three

1069
00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:05,319
Speaker 3: and we're gonna move somewhere else. And my son, he's

1070
00:54:05,360 --> 00:54:08,360
Speaker 3: a corrections officer, so you know you ain't finna come

1071
00:54:08,400 --> 00:54:10,080
Speaker 3: up and here messing with him and his wife. Both

1072
00:54:10,080 --> 00:54:13,880
Speaker 3: of them are corrections officers. My granddaughter's mam. I call

1073
00:54:13,920 --> 00:54:15,400
Speaker 3: her my baby mama. If you hear me say my

1074
00:54:15,400 --> 00:54:18,319
Speaker 3: baby mama, I'm talking about her, my baby mama. She's

1075
00:54:18,360 --> 00:54:21,160
Speaker 3: a corrections officer too. Ain't nobody finna just come walking

1076
00:54:21,239 --> 00:54:23,399
Speaker 3: up in their house is messing with because they pile pile,

1077
00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:26,400
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. But you know me by myself,

1078
00:54:26,640 --> 00:54:29,080
Speaker 3: you know, with the kids you made, people want to

1079
00:54:29,120 --> 00:54:29,759
Speaker 3: play a little bit.

1080
00:54:29,880 --> 00:54:33,480
Speaker 2: So I'm imund and find out.

1081
00:54:33,920 --> 00:54:36,680
Speaker 3: They show live and I want that to have to happen,

1082
00:54:37,480 --> 00:54:39,440
Speaker 3: you know what I mean. I want I want my

1083
00:54:39,520 --> 00:54:40,960
Speaker 3: daughter to see soft mommy.

1084
00:54:41,160 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 1: You know, I.

1085
00:54:43,360 --> 00:54:46,400
Speaker 3: Want them to see soft mommy, not you know mommy

1086
00:54:46,400 --> 00:54:48,440
Speaker 3: from the west side Eighth Street all day, you know

1087
00:54:48,480 --> 00:54:50,680
Speaker 3: what I mean, off the blocks, not huh. You know

1088
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:53,600
Speaker 3: what I mean, even though they know about them, but

1089
00:54:53,719 --> 00:54:56,600
Speaker 3: that's not who I want them to readily see. I'm

1090
00:54:56,600 --> 00:54:59,640
Speaker 3: trying to raise you know, productive citizens of the world,

1091
00:55:01,520 --> 00:55:03,960
Speaker 3: productive sentizens of the world, you know, so they can

1092
00:55:04,040 --> 00:55:05,920
Speaker 3: go anywhere in the world and be Okay.

1093
00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:10,200
Speaker 2: That's a fact. Yeah, so we almost finished. But what

1094
00:55:10,320 --> 00:55:12,239
Speaker 2: lessons do you think that we can learn from the

1095
00:55:12,280 --> 00:55:13,440
Speaker 2: story of Oscarville?

1096
00:55:17,200 --> 00:55:19,640
Speaker 3: The first story? The first lesson I think that we

1097
00:55:19,960 --> 00:55:24,080
Speaker 3: should learn is to know our history. Yeah, to care

1098
00:55:24,160 --> 00:55:29,080
Speaker 3: about our history, to uh be people. Because somebody said,

1099
00:55:29,080 --> 00:55:31,839
Speaker 3: I can't think exactly who said it, but somebody actually said,

1100
00:55:31,840 --> 00:55:33,200
Speaker 3: if you want to hide something from a nigga, put

1101
00:55:33,239 --> 00:55:33,760
Speaker 3: it in a book.

1102
00:55:34,000 --> 00:55:37,799
Speaker 2: That's a fact. I think Malcolm X said that, though he.

1103
00:55:37,880 --> 00:55:41,319
Speaker 3: Might have been telling us that somebody else said okay,

1104
00:55:41,320 --> 00:55:45,319
Speaker 3: because but I'm almost positive he might have been telling

1105
00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:47,239
Speaker 3: us about Willing Lynch for somebody. I don't know if

1106
00:55:47,239 --> 00:55:52,280
Speaker 3: it was Willy, because I know I think it was Willy.

1107
00:55:54,200 --> 00:55:58,239
Speaker 3: He was winning that faid that, But almost positive was

1108
00:55:58,239 --> 00:56:01,040
Speaker 3: Willy who said that you want to have something from

1109
00:56:01,080 --> 00:56:02,640
Speaker 3: a nigga, put it in a book. Because they think

1110
00:56:02,719 --> 00:56:05,000
Speaker 3: people think that we don't read, so pick up some

1111
00:56:05,040 --> 00:56:07,759
Speaker 3: books to read. Learn about your history, even if you

1112
00:56:07,800 --> 00:56:10,759
Speaker 3: don't know your own family history. Okay, so you was

1113
00:56:10,800 --> 00:56:13,239
Speaker 3: born in this town or in this city, don't read

1114
00:56:13,280 --> 00:56:15,040
Speaker 3: about your town your city, you know what I mean.

1115
00:56:15,200 --> 00:56:21,399
Speaker 3: Learn about your history always. Yes, it does. And if

1116
00:56:21,440 --> 00:56:24,200
Speaker 3: you don't know what's coming, how you gonna know how

1117
00:56:24,200 --> 00:56:27,319
Speaker 3: to deal with it if you don't know what's being like.

1118
00:56:27,400 --> 00:56:29,239
Speaker 3: I don't teach my children black and white. I know

1119
00:56:29,320 --> 00:56:33,000
Speaker 3: that sound crazy. None of my children will call you

1120
00:56:33,040 --> 00:56:35,600
Speaker 3: a black girl, or call me a black woman, or

1121
00:56:35,640 --> 00:56:39,959
Speaker 3: call themselves black. They'll tell you I'm brown. M Yeah,

1122
00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:42,520
Speaker 3: they say you're brown. Now if it's a white person,

1123
00:56:42,520 --> 00:56:46,759
Speaker 3: they might say you pale, they might say you pink. Hell,

1124
00:56:46,880 --> 00:56:48,839
Speaker 3: they might say you're bleed. You know what I mean,

1125
00:56:48,880 --> 00:56:50,960
Speaker 3: because after you saved, you know, sometime you know what

1126
00:56:50,960 --> 00:56:53,600
Speaker 3: I mean, depends on what you look like. But that

1127
00:56:53,800 --> 00:56:56,799
Speaker 3: they're not gonna say black and white. My children are

1128
00:56:57,520 --> 00:57:00,439
Speaker 3: they special, man, you know what I mean. I'm into

1129
00:57:00,480 --> 00:57:02,080
Speaker 3: it all the time with the school board, and I'm

1130
00:57:02,120 --> 00:57:05,080
Speaker 3: just gonna be honest. They're always at me because of

1131
00:57:05,560 --> 00:57:07,560
Speaker 3: the way that I see things. Yeah, you know what

1132
00:57:07,600 --> 00:57:10,040
Speaker 3: I mean. I'm not writing you a note every single time.

1133
00:57:11,040 --> 00:57:13,520
Speaker 3: If my child say Mom, I need a mental health day.

1134
00:57:13,760 --> 00:57:15,480
Speaker 3: People can say at work, you know what I mean?

1135
00:57:15,960 --> 00:57:18,400
Speaker 3: And my child need to stay at home today because

1136
00:57:18,440 --> 00:57:20,160
Speaker 3: they just ain't finna be their best at school today.

1137
00:57:20,160 --> 00:57:21,440
Speaker 3: Because I want you to be your best self when

1138
00:57:21,480 --> 00:57:23,160
Speaker 3: you walk out there, though, And if you got some

1139
00:57:23,200 --> 00:57:24,960
Speaker 3: stuff that you had to deal with last night or

1140
00:57:24,960 --> 00:57:26,280
Speaker 3: this morning, you might have been said, you might have

1141
00:57:26,320 --> 00:57:27,800
Speaker 3: been thinking about dad, You might have been thinking about

1142
00:57:27,800 --> 00:57:30,000
Speaker 3: things you might have been thinking about Paul, Paul, you know,

1143
00:57:30,400 --> 00:57:33,800
Speaker 3: my kids have went through some traumatic things. They lost

1144
00:57:33,840 --> 00:57:36,280
Speaker 3: their daddy. Four months later they lost their grandpa. And

1145
00:57:36,320 --> 00:57:38,400
Speaker 3: the same day, the same day they lost their grandpa,

1146
00:57:38,520 --> 00:57:41,520
Speaker 3: they lost their auntie. She goed my o. She died

1147
00:57:41,560 --> 00:57:43,680
Speaker 3: the same day my daddy, did you know what I mean?

1148
00:57:44,080 --> 00:57:45,960
Speaker 3: So my kids have been through they had to go

1149
00:57:46,000 --> 00:57:48,680
Speaker 3: through their mom and dad separated because my husband and

1150
00:57:48,720 --> 00:57:51,600
Speaker 3: I were separated for five years before he passed. He

1151
00:57:51,640 --> 00:57:53,959
Speaker 3: had a girlfriend and everything, you know what I mean.

1152
00:57:54,400 --> 00:57:57,400
Speaker 3: So they have had to deal with some stuff. So

1153
00:57:57,440 --> 00:57:58,960
Speaker 3: if they one of my kids coming to me and

1154
00:57:59,000 --> 00:58:00,600
Speaker 3: be like we Mom today, I'm just not feeling it,

1155
00:58:01,200 --> 00:58:04,880
Speaker 3: stay home and I'm not writing you a note every

1156
00:58:04,920 --> 00:58:07,000
Speaker 3: time my child stay home to tell you why because

1157
00:58:07,040 --> 00:58:10,520
Speaker 3: I'm my child's mother. All your explanation or nothing, as

1158
00:58:10,560 --> 00:58:12,680
Speaker 3: long as the work get done and the grace reflect

1159
00:58:12,680 --> 00:58:15,800
Speaker 3: the work being done. Don't keep all you I'm not

1160
00:58:15,800 --> 00:58:18,240
Speaker 3: writing you anything, so I get in to it with

1161
00:58:18,240 --> 00:58:20,160
Speaker 3: the school board A lot behind that. You know what

1162
00:58:20,200 --> 00:58:21,360
Speaker 3: I mean, because I don't write.

1163
00:58:21,200 --> 00:58:33,960
Speaker 2: Notesl So besides knowing your history, is there anythios, any

1164
00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:36,360
Speaker 2: other lessons you think we should know and that you

1165
00:58:36,400 --> 00:58:37,160
Speaker 2: don't write notes?

1166
00:58:38,200 --> 00:58:45,080
Speaker 3: Yep. Also believe in something or you're a false anything.

1167
00:58:46,000 --> 00:58:49,760
Speaker 3: Believe in something. Listen to yourself. Trust yourself, you know

1168
00:58:49,760 --> 00:58:54,160
Speaker 3: what I mean. Don't trust nobody more than you trust yourself.

1169
00:58:55,560 --> 00:58:59,080
Speaker 3: It ain't nobody on earth that's more trust trustworthy in

1170
00:58:59,120 --> 00:59:00,120
Speaker 3: your life than you.

1171
00:59:00,360 --> 00:59:02,600
Speaker 2: That's a fact. If you don't know what I mean,

1172
00:59:03,040 --> 00:59:03,479
Speaker 2: who will?

1173
00:59:05,240 --> 00:59:08,040
Speaker 3: Right? When God bless you with certain things in your hands,

1174
00:59:08,160 --> 00:59:10,760
Speaker 3: he blessed you with him because He trusted you with them,

1175
00:59:11,000 --> 00:59:13,600
Speaker 3: it ain't for you to take it and deny yourself

1176
00:59:13,760 --> 00:59:15,960
Speaker 3: or put your own self down and say well I can't,

1177
00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:19,760
Speaker 3: I can't, I can't. I wasn't designed and go touch

1178
00:59:19,840 --> 00:59:23,640
Speaker 3: somebody else and say well, hey do this. No, he

1179
00:59:23,680 --> 00:59:26,200
Speaker 3: gave it to you, so you do it. Trust yourself,

1180
00:59:26,400 --> 00:59:28,480
Speaker 3: trust the God in you, which every one makes you

1181
00:59:28,480 --> 00:59:30,800
Speaker 3: feel more comfortable because people believe differently. And I try

1182
00:59:30,840 --> 00:59:33,320
Speaker 3: to speak in a way that I don't offend anybody,

1183
00:59:33,320 --> 00:59:35,560
Speaker 3: but I stand true to what I believe. You know

1184
00:59:35,600 --> 00:59:39,280
Speaker 3: what I'm saying. So trust yourself. Don't trust nobody more

1185
00:59:39,320 --> 00:59:41,280
Speaker 3: than you trust you, other than the big g.

1186
00:59:41,960 --> 00:59:44,960
Speaker 2: Yeah. You know earlier you spoke about how you will

1187
00:59:45,000 --> 00:59:49,160
Speaker 2: be willing to go to Lakelander and pay homage to Oscarville.

1188
00:59:50,280 --> 00:59:51,880
Speaker 2: Do you think they should just close it down? Like

1189
00:59:51,880 --> 00:59:53,760
Speaker 2: what do you think should happen with lake Land?

1190
00:59:55,320 --> 00:59:57,440
Speaker 3: See when you ask me questions like that's not it's

1191
00:59:57,440 --> 01:00:00,720
Speaker 3: gonna get controversial. I think they should drink that. I

1192
01:00:00,720 --> 01:00:05,800
Speaker 3: think it should be drained. I think that after all

1193
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:08,400
Speaker 3: these years, I think it should be drained. I think

1194
01:00:08,440 --> 01:00:11,640
Speaker 3: that all of the people that's buried down there should

1195
01:00:12,200 --> 01:00:15,680
Speaker 3: the graveyards. It's twenty five graveyards down there, you know

1196
01:00:15,720 --> 01:00:17,320
Speaker 3: what I mean. That's people loved ones that they can

1197
01:00:17,360 --> 01:00:23,200
Speaker 3: never visit. That's bodies you know of people that their

1198
01:00:23,240 --> 01:00:26,560
Speaker 3: loved ones can never visit, you know what I mean.

1199
01:00:26,840 --> 01:00:29,760
Speaker 3: So I think it should be drained. I think that

1200
01:00:29,760 --> 01:00:31,600
Speaker 3: would be a nice thing to do. Drain it and

1201
01:00:31,640 --> 01:00:38,400
Speaker 3: then let the rightful owners of the land rebuild. Why

1202
01:00:38,480 --> 01:00:41,280
Speaker 3: can't we have it the people who belong them, the

1203
01:00:41,320 --> 01:00:45,840
Speaker 3: people whose families lost their lives there. It's rightfully theirs.

1204
01:00:46,080 --> 01:00:48,680
Speaker 3: I don't care if you got somebody to sell you

1205
01:00:48,720 --> 01:00:50,920
Speaker 3: the land for a little bit or nothing, but they

1206
01:00:51,200 --> 01:00:55,920
Speaker 3: what you bought, whatever piece of property you bought, Uh,

1207
01:00:56,120 --> 01:00:58,000
Speaker 3: it wasn't worth the lives that was lost, you know

1208
01:00:58,040 --> 01:01:01,400
Speaker 3: what I mean. So, I mean that's just me. If

1209
01:01:01,400 --> 01:01:03,400
Speaker 3: I was the person that was in power and I

1210
01:01:03,480 --> 01:01:06,760
Speaker 3: could just make things happen, it would be drained, it

1211
01:01:06,760 --> 01:01:10,160
Speaker 3: would be clean, and then the land would be giving

1212
01:01:10,200 --> 01:01:13,560
Speaker 3: back to the people. What y'all choose to do with it,

1213
01:01:13,680 --> 01:01:17,680
Speaker 3: that's on y'all. Whoever the descendants of the families are,

1214
01:01:17,720 --> 01:01:20,920
Speaker 3: whatever they choose to do with they land that their

1215
01:01:21,040 --> 01:01:25,000
Speaker 3: ancensitors took the time to build this place up, with

1216
01:01:25,120 --> 01:01:27,760
Speaker 3: the sweater, their brows and all that stuff that they

1217
01:01:27,800 --> 01:01:30,960
Speaker 3: had to go through, even before they even created Oscarville.

1218
01:01:31,600 --> 01:01:36,000
Speaker 3: Ain't nobody just give them Oscarville. They built it. So

1219
01:01:36,120 --> 01:01:39,600
Speaker 3: for all the people that built Oscarville, they bloodline their families.

1220
01:01:39,760 --> 01:01:41,800
Speaker 3: Who knows, that's probably some of our families, you know,

1221
01:01:41,800 --> 01:01:44,000
Speaker 3: what I mean, some of our blood lines and stuff,

1222
01:01:44,960 --> 01:01:46,919
Speaker 3: give it back. I'm a strong believer in giving people

1223
01:01:46,920 --> 01:01:50,920
Speaker 3: what they belong, what likely their Yeah, what's rightfully theirs.

1224
01:01:51,000 --> 01:01:53,600
Speaker 3: I'm a strong believer in that. You know, we can't.

1225
01:01:53,840 --> 01:01:56,560
Speaker 3: This was so messed up and so used to people

1226
01:01:56,640 --> 01:02:01,320
Speaker 3: taking stuff, stealing stuff, raping on stuff. That's how my

1227
01:02:01,360 --> 01:02:04,919
Speaker 3: daughter say, raping on people, raping on you know, and

1228
01:02:06,680 --> 01:02:10,440
Speaker 3: we don't even know, we don't even have a clue.

1229
01:02:10,520 --> 01:02:12,600
Speaker 3: And then when somebody like me stand up and say something,

1230
01:02:12,960 --> 01:02:15,480
Speaker 3: you have other people that look like me too, man

1231
01:02:16,400 --> 01:02:19,440
Speaker 3: have something negative to say, or she making that up.

1232
01:02:19,560 --> 01:02:21,840
Speaker 3: Oh that's not true. Well, if you was to just

1233
01:02:21,920 --> 01:02:24,720
Speaker 3: do a little bit of research, you will find out

1234
01:02:24,720 --> 01:02:27,320
Speaker 3: it's not just Oscarville. You will find out that that

1235
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:30,880
Speaker 3: major park in the New York City that was a

1236
01:02:30,920 --> 01:02:34,160
Speaker 3: black town once that uh what is it called? Something

1237
01:02:34,200 --> 01:02:37,560
Speaker 3: park like And there's so many places that's place in Alabama.

1238
01:02:38,200 --> 01:02:40,360
Speaker 3: There's places all over the world like that, you know

1239
01:02:40,360 --> 01:02:43,880
Speaker 3: what I mean. So I think that we should do

1240
01:02:43,960 --> 01:02:46,360
Speaker 3: some research and get to know something, read something for ourselves.

1241
01:02:46,600 --> 01:02:52,160
Speaker 3: But somebody told us that Central Park, yes, who was

1242
01:02:52,200 --> 01:02:58,560
Speaker 3: a black town too before it became the part I

1243
01:02:58,600 --> 01:03:00,760
Speaker 3: can't really readily tell you the name of it, you

1244
01:03:00,760 --> 01:03:02,360
Speaker 3: know what I mean. Yeah, I'm not gonna just make

1245
01:03:02,440 --> 01:03:06,160
Speaker 3: up something sound intelligent, but I can't tell you. If

1246
01:03:06,200 --> 01:03:07,840
Speaker 3: you do the research, you will find out that there

1247
01:03:07,920 --> 01:03:11,880
Speaker 3: was once a black community thriving there. Yeah.

1248
01:03:12,360 --> 01:03:15,800
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know. Well, I'm happy that we were finally

1249
01:03:15,880 --> 01:03:18,439
Speaker 2: able to make this happen. I'm gonna have to bring

1250
01:03:18,480 --> 01:03:20,280
Speaker 2: you back on the show because what a story, what

1251
01:03:20,360 --> 01:03:21,080
Speaker 2: a life you live?

1252
01:03:22,800 --> 01:03:25,160
Speaker 3: Can y'all can y'all guess see you? Can they see

1253
01:03:25,160 --> 01:03:27,640
Speaker 3: how beautiful you are? I see you in this moment

1254
01:03:27,800 --> 01:03:30,560
Speaker 3: to see just how beautiful you look than you You

1255
01:03:30,720 --> 01:03:33,880
Speaker 3: just looks so beautiful right now, You're just glowing and everything.

1256
01:03:34,520 --> 01:03:34,880
Speaker 1: Thank you.

1257
01:03:35,120 --> 01:03:39,400
Speaker 3: I love you. Yes, so beautiful.

1258
01:03:40,200 --> 01:03:42,800
Speaker 2: No, We're gonna definitely keep in contact. I'm gonna figure

1259
01:03:42,800 --> 01:03:44,840
Speaker 2: out some things. So definitely gonna incorporate you in so

1260
01:03:44,840 --> 01:03:47,160
Speaker 2: we can get your story told. So you have a

1261
01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:51,720
Speaker 2: little sister to me, a professional homegirl. Yes, so definitely

1262
01:03:51,720 --> 01:03:53,720
Speaker 2: reach out whenever you need some help and support, or

1263
01:03:53,840 --> 01:03:56,479
Speaker 2: just when you start giging down your ideas. Let's start

1264
01:03:56,480 --> 01:03:57,640
Speaker 2: brainstorming on some things.

1265
01:03:58,160 --> 01:04:05,920
Speaker 3: Okay, I have books. I have books already for years.

1266
01:04:06,240 --> 01:04:08,400
Speaker 2: Yes, so we're gonna make some things happen for sure.

1267
01:04:09,760 --> 01:04:11,880
Speaker 2: And to my listeners, if you have any questions, comments

1268
01:04:11,920 --> 01:04:14,160
Speaker 2: to the concerns, so you want to just say hey girl, hey,

1269
01:04:14,280 --> 01:04:15,880
Speaker 2: please make sure to email me a hello at the

1270
01:04:15,920 --> 01:04:19,360
Speaker 2: psgpodcast dot com. And to my guests, thank you, thank you,

1271
01:04:19,480 --> 01:04:22,480
Speaker 2: thank you. After what a couple of months, almost six

1272
01:04:22,520 --> 01:04:24,720
Speaker 2: months now, we were able to make this happen. So

1273
01:04:24,760 --> 01:04:26,600
Speaker 2: thank you so much for wanting to be a part

1274
01:04:26,600 --> 01:04:28,400
Speaker 2: of the Professional Homegirl Podcast.

1275
01:04:29,240 --> 01:04:31,120
Speaker 3: Yes, thank you for having me.

1276
01:04:31,280 --> 01:04:45,400
Speaker 2: Yes, and until next time, everyone later please okay. The

1277
01:04:45,400 --> 01:04:48,680
Speaker 2: Professional Homegirl Podcast is a production of the Black Effect

1278
01:04:48,760 --> 01:04:53,439
Speaker 2: Podcast Network. For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app,

1279
01:04:53,600 --> 01:04:56,280
Speaker 2: Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.

1280
01:04:56,400 --> 01:04:59,280
Speaker 2: Don't forget to subscribe and break the show, and you

1281
01:04:59,320 --> 01:05:02,000
Speaker 2: can connect with me on social media at the PhD

1282
01:05:02,200 --> 01:05:02,720
Speaker 2: Podcast