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Speaker 1: My friends didn't invite me to their wedding, so I

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Speaker 1: excluded them from my Christmas party. I think that's a

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Speaker 1: fair trade.

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Speaker 2: I don't know, exclude them from two more Christmas part Yeah, Jacksonica, you.

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Speaker 3: Need to have a honka and then exclude.

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Speaker 1: I throw a pretty big Christmas party every year, going

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Speaker 1: on a decade now. A few years ago, at one

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Speaker 1: I threw my friend Tara met my former coworker Tony,

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Speaker 1: and they hit it off. They dated for a while,

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Speaker 1: and two years later, once again at my Christmas party,

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Speaker 1: she showed up with a ring on her finger and

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Speaker 1: they announced for the first time that they were engaged.

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Speaker 1: I was super happy for them. They got married this spring.

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Speaker 1: We didn't get invited. It was literally your party that

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Speaker 1: led to them getting married. By the way, this comes

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Speaker 1: from throwaway not invite on the OK storytime separed it.

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Speaker 1: So when I was sending around my party invitations this year,

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Speaker 1: I didn't see any reason to invite them back if

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Speaker 1: they didn't think I wasn't worthy of making their guest list.

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Speaker 1: I have known them both for years, basically introduced them,

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Speaker 1: and they literally announced their engagement at my home. It

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Speaker 1: got back to me today that they're very we're upset

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Speaker 1: with us for not inviting them this year, that my

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Speaker 1: party is something they consider special, and they think I'm

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Speaker 1: being petty.

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Speaker 3: How big was there wed I.

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Speaker 1: Think that that's what I was going to ask, because

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Speaker 1: if it was a small wedding, that makes sense.

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Speaker 3: If it was a huge wedding, you didn't get invited.

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Speaker 3: And that's how I went the heck.

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Speaker 1: A couple friends mentioned it was a smaller wedding, and

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Speaker 1: they feel like I'm just not punishing them. It wasn't though.

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Speaker 1: There were probably two hundred people there, and I know

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Speaker 1: at least fifty of them, and I was a little

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Speaker 1: surprised at some of the names that made the cut

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Speaker 1: over us. I didn't make a stink about it or anything,

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Speaker 1: but I don't see why I should welcome them into

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Speaker 1: my home again after being snubbed like that.

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Speaker 2: I didn't make a stink of it, but I just

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Speaker 2: held in my emotions. And then it didn't invite them

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Speaker 2: to my party.

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Speaker 1: You can't go to my birthday party.

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Speaker 3: You really can't come to my birthday.

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Speaker 1: My partner thinks I should just let it go and

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Speaker 1: invite them back, but I don't see a reason why

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Speaker 1: I should am I the a hole? And there are

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Speaker 1: some realman comments IESI I don't think you have to

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Speaker 1: invite anyone that you don't want to invite.

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Speaker 2: I think yes, And I think that if you don't

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Speaker 2: invite someone out of spite, yeah, because you are hurt

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Speaker 2: you weren't invited, but you I think it could have

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Speaker 2: had a conversay feeling.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it feels quite immature.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I think you could have had a conversation that said, like, hey,

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Speaker 1: it was pretty hurt that you didn't come to the

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Speaker 1: wedding or that I wasn't invited to the wedding, and

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Speaker 1: you know, especially because you consider my party to be

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Speaker 1: an important thing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, but instead I'm just you know, not going

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Speaker 2: to invite.

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Speaker 1: Inviting relevant comments. Niked ninety two says, not the eight hole.

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Speaker 1: You can invite and not invite whoever you want without

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Speaker 1: any reason, and if they want one, it's a smaller

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Speaker 1: party this year. Hoto and Fuego says one hundred percent

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Speaker 1: this if the event was so special to them, then

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Speaker 1: they would associate it with you as well as a

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Speaker 1: special friend and would have invited you. Piffley says it

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Speaker 1: also feels so tacky to STEP's Christmas party to announce

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Speaker 1: their engagement like that. If they had asked Op beforehand,

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Speaker 1: then it would be different. But just showing up with

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Speaker 1: the rings on HCO two thousand says right, they got

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Speaker 1: a snazzy engagement party that had bartenders and was catered

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Speaker 1: for free. It's gross that they're more upset they're missing

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Speaker 1: the party and not that they heard Ope. Even if

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Speaker 1: it wasn't their intention, that is true. Like they made

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Speaker 1: no you know, attempt to apologize to Op. It was

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Speaker 1: just like, my good, we got to your party.

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Speaker 2: Well, we are missing so much context here.

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Speaker 1: This is true.

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Speaker 3: No context here.

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Speaker 2: We don't know if like, how do they know that

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Speaker 2: that's the reason unless Opie said it.

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Speaker 1: I think that they they mentioned that they or at

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Speaker 1: least the friend.

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Speaker 2: I think that they're something. Now, No, they didn't know,

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Speaker 2: but yeah, I think they knew.

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Speaker 3: The reason they know and I think that's because op

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Speaker 3: probably said something.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, so maybe they don't know that the reason

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Speaker 1: you know why they weren't invited the clumsy pirates is

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Speaker 1: not the a hole. If they can't even invite the

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Speaker 1: person who introduced them to their wedding, then I don't

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Speaker 1: think they should expect an invitation to your Christmas party.

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Speaker 1: If you're not close enough to make it to the

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Speaker 1: wedding invite list, why should they be close enough to

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Speaker 1: you to make it to your Christmas party? Opie says,

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Speaker 1: you don't know the half of it. Over the last

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Speaker 1: few years, we have literally had it catered, had bar

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Speaker 1: tenders inside and outside, even hired someone to entertain kids

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Speaker 1: earlier in the night. This sounds like a sick Christmas party.

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Speaker 3: Can I get the invite?

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Speaker 4: Come on?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? Can I take their invite?

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Speaker 5: Yeah? Can we?

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Speaker 1: My partner and I put so much time, energy and

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Speaker 1: money into this every year because we love our friends.

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Speaker 1: It started out small when we were younger, and now

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Speaker 1: it's this big thing. I just don't like being taken

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Speaker 1: for granted. Brands Anon says, yeah, this all is making

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Speaker 1: a lot more sense now. You go out of your

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Speaker 1: way every year to throw this huge party for everyone,

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Speaker 1: and now they're upset they're the only ones that are

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Speaker 1: missing out, Not like they cared when all of your

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Speaker 1: friends went to their wedding and you were the only

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Speaker 1: ones missing out. Screw these people. You don't owe them anything,

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Speaker 1: I hope, he says, Yeah. I guess that about sums

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Speaker 1: it up, thank you, and there is an update. I

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Speaker 1: think I think I understood. I'm a little bit on

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Speaker 1: the side of like they could have talked it out,

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Speaker 1: could have had a conversation and stuff. But also sometimes

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Speaker 1: it's like you're just you realize, oh, I'm not really

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Speaker 1: that close with that person, and it's like, yeah, is

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Speaker 1: it even worth having conversation it?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I'm understanding a little no more.

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Speaker 2: But it doesn't seem like, oh yeah, so like I

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Speaker 2: don't feel like that good of friends with them, so

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Speaker 2: I was not gonna invite it. But I mean it

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Speaker 2: was almost explicit that, like I'm not going to invite

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Speaker 2: them because they didn't invite me. And yeah, I'm not

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Speaker 2: the biggest fan of the penniness around.

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Speaker 1: But there is an update, So let's find out if

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Speaker 1: this is all hashed out?

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Speaker 3: Can I come to this Christmas party?

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Speaker 1: Though I still really want to come to this christ

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Speaker 1: party as pretty sick dang, y'all. I never expected my

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Speaker 1: posts would blow up the way it did. Here's the

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Speaker 1: original post for reference, since I got so many requests

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Speaker 1: to check back in. Here's the update. I stuck to

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Speaker 1: my guns and did not invite them to my Christmas party.

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Speaker 1: My partner stood by me when I told them I

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Speaker 1: had made my decision and didn't bring it up again.

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Speaker 1: Neither did our friends. Many of you guessed that they

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Speaker 1: would try and crash our party. I got worried that

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Speaker 1: could happen after all the responses, but thankfully it didn't.

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Speaker 1: Probably one hundred plus of you guess she wanted to

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Speaker 1: hijack the party to announce she was pregnant. If that's

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Speaker 1: the case, they haven't told anyone as far as I

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Speaker 1: know that what I was like. No. They did, however,

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Speaker 1: decide to try and throw their own party at the

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Speaker 1: same time as ours. Okay, out there several friends told

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Speaker 1: us they were trying to convince them to come to

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Speaker 1: theirs instead. Okay, but your there's his lame.

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Speaker 3: And I reading they.

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Speaker 1: I honestly hope they had some guests and had a

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Speaker 1: great time. I wish them no ill will, But I

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Speaker 1: think just about everyone we expected came to our party,

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Speaker 1: so I doubt they poached any guests from us. They

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Speaker 1: made enough of a last minute foss over this that

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Speaker 1: the whole thing became the gossip of our party. They're doing,

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Speaker 1: not mine. I chose to not engage in it, but

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Speaker 1: The consensus I heard was everyone thought it was bizarre

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Speaker 1: they chose not to invite us to their wedding, and

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Speaker 1: that them complaining about not being invited to our party

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Speaker 1: was in poor taste. Most common questions on Reddit was

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Speaker 1: why did we not get an invite to their wedding?

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Speaker 1: From what I can tell from people at our party

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Speaker 1: gossiping about the situation, they said it was because we're

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Speaker 1: a little bit older than they are. I think that's weird,

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Speaker 1: since my partner and I are both thirty five, they're

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Speaker 1: twenty eight, twenty nine, so it's not like we're very

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Speaker 1: far apart.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's I don't I don't trust that reason all.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, that's silly.

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Speaker 3: I'm friends with people that age well.

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Speaker 1: Sarah Terra used to hang out with us at least

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Speaker 1: once a week when she was single, and I literally

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Speaker 1: introduced that. The whole thing still seems strange to me,

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Speaker 1: but I guess it is what it is. And by

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Speaker 1: the way, you know what else is what it is?

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Speaker 1: Joining us live every weekday at three PMPST on YouTube

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Speaker 1: just to her profile, that is what it is. So yeah,

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Speaker 1: that's how it all went down. Our party was a blast.

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Speaker 1: We got to see so many friends, some of which

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Speaker 1: we haven't really seen since before COVID. Everyone had a

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Speaker 1: great time. People literally brought todthers we hadn't gotten to

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Speaker 1: meet yet because of how crazy the world has been

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Speaker 1: over the last couple of years. It was a wonderful evening.

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Speaker 1: I hope y'all had it as good of a Christmas

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Speaker 1: as we did. And that is the end of that story.

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Speaker 3: So lovely this Christmas party you're having.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, have we talked about what's happening this Christmas? Because

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Speaker 1: Christmas is coming up again.

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Speaker 2: My best friend blocked me a month before the wedding

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Speaker 2: because I didn't support her enough. Me and Elsie, both

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Speaker 2: twenty six year old female, met around four or five

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Speaker 2: years ago when our ex boyfriends were best friends. We

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Speaker 2: got on really well and spent a decade amount of

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Speaker 2: time together. Oh, decent amount of time together. A decade

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Speaker 2: very different as we both lived in the same city

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Speaker 2: and only had our jobs to worry about. As life

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Speaker 2: went on, we both got into adult relationships and had

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Speaker 2: more on our plates job wise through promotions, training, et cetera.

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Speaker 2: So we weren't seeing each other as often or texting

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Speaker 2: as much. And by the way, this comes from you

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Speaker 2: Mick Shaddy on the r okay storytime set redditself a

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Speaker 2: About two years ago, Elsie moved to another city a

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Speaker 2: few hours away with our partner, and naturally we haven't

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Speaker 2: been able to see each other as much, but we

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Speaker 2: still kept in contact and had ketchups in person or

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Speaker 2: over the phone every six months or so. I've had

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Speaker 2: this with a few old friends and have always thought

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Speaker 2: it's fairly normal to have friends who you communicate with

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Speaker 2: when you can, but aren't necessarily, you know, talking or

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Speaker 2: seeing each other every day friends anymore.

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Speaker 3: Once adult life sets in. Yeah, it makes sense.

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Speaker 2: However, it might be worth noting that I am somewhat

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Speaker 2: autistic and definitely ADHD, so sometimes social norms may escape

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Speaker 2: my understanding. Elsie got engaged at the start of this year,

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Speaker 2: which I was so excited to hear. She didn't ask

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Speaker 2: me to be a bridesmaid, which was fine with me,

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Speaker 2: as I said, we weren't quite as close as we

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Speaker 2: once had been, but I was invited to the bachelorette trip.

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Speaker 2: She didn't ask for any help or input into the

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Speaker 2: wedding planning, so I assumed that was just required for

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00:09:25,160 --> 00:09:28,280
Speaker 2: the trip and the wedding up until recently. I was

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Speaker 2: unemployed for a year and my mental health has taken

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Speaker 2: a bit of a hit. I've talked about this else

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Speaker 2: many times, and she'd always been incredibly understanding and supportive.

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Speaker 2: She understood I had financial troubles and also seemed to

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Speaker 2: understand that I wasn't always as communicative as normal if

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Speaker 2: I was in a depressive period. She'd always said there

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Speaker 2: was no pressure on me for regular texting slash calls,

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Speaker 2: and seemed fine with us chatting every few months or so.

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Speaker 2: I had still been saving up for my flights, etc.

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Speaker 2: For the bachelorette trip, which is in a month, which

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Speaker 2: she knew. I let her know i'd be booking the

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Speaker 2: flights a few weeks before the trip. As far as

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Speaker 2: I was aware, there were no issues and everyone was

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Speaker 2: happy and excited for the wedding and trip. Until last

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00:10:09,480 --> 00:10:13,440
Speaker 2: week I saw that I had suddenly been removed from

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Speaker 2: the bachelorolette. I'm having my brain's much at this point,

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Speaker 2: I was taken out the bachelorette group chat. Elsie hadn't

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Speaker 2: contacted me personally for a couple of months. We'd spoken

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Speaker 2: on the phone for a number of hours back in August,

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00:10:26,120 --> 00:10:28,480
Speaker 2: but I hadn't sent each other messages since then. I

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00:10:28,520 --> 00:10:31,200
Speaker 2: was really shocked to see I'd been removed without any

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Speaker 2: communication from her, as this is so unlike her. I

248
00:10:34,679 --> 00:10:37,440
Speaker 2: sent her a private message asking if everything was all right.

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Speaker 2: After four or five days, she still hadn't replied, so

250
00:10:40,080 --> 00:10:42,840
Speaker 2: my messaged again last night to ask if I should

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Speaker 2: still book the flights for the trip, as I wasn't

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Speaker 2: sure what was going on. I made it clear that

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Speaker 2: I would respect whatever her decision was, and I hoped

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Speaker 2: I hadn't offended her in any way. To be honest,

255
00:10:52,880 --> 00:10:55,719
Speaker 2: I was expecting her to say it was a simple misunderstanding,

256
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Speaker 2: or even perhaps say she'd prefer to invite a closer

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Speaker 2: friend on the trip, which I would have understood if

258
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Speaker 2: been slightly hurt. But you know, I would have dealt

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Speaker 2: with it fine. But I was not expecting the text

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Speaker 2: I then got from her, What do.

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Speaker 3: You think it is?

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Speaker 4: I hate you?

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00:11:09,679 --> 00:11:11,959
Speaker 3: I liked your face.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: She sent a very long message detailing how she had

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Speaker 2: hoped for my support during the wedding a planning process

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Speaker 2: and felt like our friendship wasn't what it used to be.

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Speaker 2: She said she'd assumed from my lack of contact that

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Speaker 2: I wasn't interested in attending. She said that she made

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Speaker 2: the decision to remove me from not only the bachelorette

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Speaker 2: trip but the wedding as well, but thanked me for

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Speaker 2: our years of friendship and wished me.

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Speaker 1: Well, what this is so weird to not even like

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Speaker 1: have a single conversation. I just assumed that you were out.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I disinvited you, not explicitly but in my head to

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Speaker 2: our wedding, and I unfriended you.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, but thank you for your year's of service. We

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Speaker 1: appreciate you. Here's here's the country. Thanks you.

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Speaker 2: Here's a purple stripe for your service. I was quite

281
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:04,280
Speaker 2: shocked by this and felt awful. I had obviously upset her.

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Speaker 2: I went to send a reply, planning on apologizing and

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Speaker 2: say I completely respected her decision and if she was

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Speaker 2: ever in my city to give me a call. But

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Speaker 2: I never got that far because she had blocked me.

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Speaker 4: WHOA immediately.

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Speaker 1: This is what is going on.

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Speaker 3: I will never understand people blocking.

289
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Speaker 1: I don't get it. Why are we so quick?

290
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Speaker 2: Just block quick, quick with it? You kind of upset

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00:12:26,120 --> 00:12:29,600
Speaker 2: me block black black. I checked socials and she had

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Speaker 2: blocked me on most of them as well. While I

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00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,120
Speaker 2: found the message a bit dramatic.

294
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Speaker 3: I also find it very dramatic.

295
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Speaker 2: I didn't necessarily disagree with the content, but her decision

296
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Speaker 2: to block me is what shocked me most. I wasn't

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Speaker 2: quite sure what support she had been expecting. As I mentioned,

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Speaker 2: I wasn't a bridesmaid and I lived hours away.

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Speaker 3: Bless you. That hurt you good?

300
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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: I purposely not hounded her with questions about how the

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Speaker 2: wedding planning was going. A said, thought she would have

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00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:58,959
Speaker 2: enough to deal with. I never thought this would be

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Speaker 2: an issue, but clear it was the wrong decision. She

305
00:13:01,679 --> 00:13:03,840
Speaker 2: is my first friend to get married, so I'm not

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Speaker 2: really sure how normal wedding guests are supposed to act

307
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Speaker 2: in these situations.

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Speaker 1: Also, dear just state them say it says, if op

309
00:13:10,840 --> 00:13:13,400
Speaker 1: is autistic, then Elsie needs to state explicitly with the

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Speaker 1: f she wants to not expect an autistic person to

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Speaker 1: read your mind, which is a great point. Hopefully your

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Speaker 1: friend Elsie is aware of this, which it seems like, oh,

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Speaker 1: he's pretty open about it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, if you were good friends, Yeah, she would know.

315
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Speaker 5: She would know.

316
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Speaker 1: So it's pretty rude.

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Speaker 3: That she was like, nah, I'm just gonna drop I

318
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Speaker 3: was waiting to get my input.

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Speaker 2: But I'm just so confused why she expected her to

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Speaker 2: help out with the wedding. Yeah, but she wasn't like

321
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Speaker 2: a bridesmaid. Yeah, it's like what she's just a guest

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Speaker 2: to the wedding. And yes, they have a friendship that

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Speaker 2: used to be closer, but it seemed like a mutual

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Speaker 2: like you know, distancing, not in the negative way, but friendship's.

325
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Speaker 1: Distance a little very strange.

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Speaker 3: And so I'm confused why she just like again unfriended.

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Speaker 1: Her immediately without any confersation.

328
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Speaker 2: And like it's one thing to like go someone and

329
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Speaker 2: be like I don't want to be this person's friend,

330
00:13:59,679 --> 00:14:01,920
Speaker 2: which I I don't agree with, but to just disinvite

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Speaker 2: someone to a wedding without telling them that we divide

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00:14:04,600 --> 00:14:07,280
Speaker 2: it is like another level of it. Yeah, Given she'd

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00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:10,479
Speaker 2: expressed to me that she didn't expect regular texts, understood

334
00:14:10,480 --> 00:14:12,920
Speaker 2: my struggles, and hadn't reached out to me herself, I'm

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00:14:12,920 --> 00:14:15,800
Speaker 2: shocked that our lack of recent communication was enough of

336
00:14:15,800 --> 00:14:17,840
Speaker 2: an issue for her to block me from her life

337
00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:21,400
Speaker 2: after years of friendship. And also like the had explicitly

338
00:14:21,440 --> 00:14:23,880
Speaker 2: talked about it, and she was like, oh, you're fine,

339
00:14:24,000 --> 00:14:25,280
Speaker 2: Like you know, we're busy.

340
00:14:25,360 --> 00:14:25,920
Speaker 3: It's all right.

341
00:14:27,120 --> 00:14:29,520
Speaker 2: If I had been ignoring messages from her, that's one thing.

342
00:14:29,560 --> 00:14:32,000
Speaker 2: But she hadn't attempted to communicate with me for a

343
00:14:32,040 --> 00:14:34,600
Speaker 2: while either. I never thought much of this, as we've

344
00:14:34,640 --> 00:14:37,360
Speaker 2: gone for about six months without talking before, and I

345
00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:40,480
Speaker 2: knew she must be super busy. I'm just shocked she

346
00:14:40,560 --> 00:14:43,920
Speaker 2: felt the need to take such drastic action without communicating

347
00:14:43,960 --> 00:14:47,480
Speaker 2: first exactly. Yeah, and she told me she'd like my

348
00:14:47,600 --> 00:14:49,960
Speaker 2: involvement in the planning process. I would have been more

349
00:14:50,000 --> 00:14:52,440
Speaker 2: than happy to oblige, but she never said anything to

350
00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:54,400
Speaker 2: me at all, just went straight to blocking me.

351
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Speaker 3: Any thoughts.

352
00:14:55,600 --> 00:14:58,000
Speaker 1: I just think this is really unfair on the part

353
00:14:58,000 --> 00:14:58,360
Speaker 1: of the friend.

354
00:14:58,520 --> 00:15:00,600
Speaker 3: I agree, very harsh. There's no reason.

355
00:15:00,600 --> 00:15:03,440
Speaker 2: And you, guys, you told your friend you were you

356
00:15:03,480 --> 00:15:06,280
Speaker 2: were good and that yeah, her behaviors were fine, and

357
00:15:06,320 --> 00:15:08,440
Speaker 2: then you decided they weren't fine without telling her.

358
00:15:08,560 --> 00:15:12,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, you retroactively decided, and you with that all. Yeah,

359
00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:15,080
Speaker 1: that's alling her, just really really not cool, and.

360
00:15:15,000 --> 00:15:17,000
Speaker 3: Then blocked her on top of the box, Yeah, which

361
00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:20,560
Speaker 3: is just even cruel. Yeah.

362
00:15:20,720 --> 00:15:23,120
Speaker 2: So I'm wondering if as this was my first friend

363
00:15:23,120 --> 00:15:25,400
Speaker 2: to get married and I'm new to the situation. I

364
00:15:25,440 --> 00:15:27,680
Speaker 2: didn't pick up on social cues of how he should

365
00:15:27,680 --> 00:15:30,640
Speaker 2: be acting during the planning process. Is there an unwritten

366
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:32,960
Speaker 2: rule that I missed? Should I have been texting her

367
00:15:33,000 --> 00:15:36,120
Speaker 2: regularly asking how it was going. I feel so sad

368
00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:38,120
Speaker 2: because I never wanted to lose her as a friend.

369
00:15:38,160 --> 00:15:40,160
Speaker 2: I just didn't know she had an issue with me.

370
00:15:40,680 --> 00:15:43,640
Speaker 2: Is there some glaringly obvious thing that I've done wrong here?

371
00:15:44,080 --> 00:15:44,520
Speaker 3: There isn't.

372
00:15:44,600 --> 00:15:44,800
Speaker 5: Edit.

373
00:15:44,920 --> 00:15:46,640
Speaker 2: I do want to mention that I have a friend

374
00:15:46,680 --> 00:15:50,000
Speaker 2: who's autistic, and he has like a lot of wounding,

375
00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:53,280
Speaker 2: emotional wounding just around the fact of like again with

376
00:15:53,560 --> 00:15:57,360
Speaker 2: autist autistic tendency to like uh not pick up on.

377
00:15:57,320 --> 00:16:00,560
Speaker 3: Social cues, like a big fear around. I'm like, am

378
00:16:00,600 --> 00:16:01,520
Speaker 3: I missing anything?

379
00:16:01,920 --> 00:16:04,720
Speaker 2: And so I'm just reading this feeling compassionate, Yeah, compassion

380
00:16:04,800 --> 00:16:07,200
Speaker 2: for ope of like she's making it like, oh, what

381
00:16:07,240 --> 00:16:08,080
Speaker 2: did I do wrong?

382
00:16:08,240 --> 00:16:11,440
Speaker 1: And it's like, no, this is your friend who is

383
00:16:11,480 --> 00:16:15,360
Speaker 1: not empathetic or understanding or communicative.

384
00:16:15,800 --> 00:16:19,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, Marca. Highest just seems hostile for no reason,

385
00:16:20,480 --> 00:16:22,800
Speaker 2: Miss silver Teer. Why would someone who is just a

386
00:16:22,880 --> 00:16:25,560
Speaker 2: guest help plan her wedding that's made of honor?

387
00:16:25,640 --> 00:16:27,960
Speaker 3: Bridesmaid expectations. Yea, the same thoughts here. She was just

388
00:16:28,000 --> 00:16:29,560
Speaker 3: a guest, just a guest.

389
00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:31,720
Speaker 2: She wouldn't she Not only was she not the maid

390
00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:33,320
Speaker 2: of honor, she wasn't even a bridesmaid.

391
00:16:33,720 --> 00:16:34,160
Speaker 5: So edit.

392
00:16:34,240 --> 00:16:36,280
Speaker 2: I scrolled back through our chat history to get a

393
00:16:36,320 --> 00:16:38,120
Speaker 2: sense of us growing apart and to see if I'd

394
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:41,040
Speaker 2: been or remiss in my communication. Towards the end of

395
00:16:41,040 --> 00:16:43,200
Speaker 2: twenty twenty one and early twenty twenty two, we were

396
00:16:43,200 --> 00:16:45,720
Speaker 2: messaging a bit less, but still every week or so.

397
00:16:45,920 --> 00:16:48,800
Speaker 2: In February twenty twenty two, I messaged asking if she

398
00:16:48,880 --> 00:16:51,240
Speaker 2: was free the following week, and she didn't read or

399
00:16:51,280 --> 00:16:54,560
Speaker 2: reply the message until July twenty twenty two.

400
00:16:54,880 --> 00:16:56,800
Speaker 3: That's so many months.

401
00:16:56,480 --> 00:16:59,400
Speaker 1: So many months. Wow, just weird.

402
00:17:00,120 --> 00:17:04,840
Speaker 2: Sometimes I'm bad. I don't reply for like a week? Yeah, months, months, months, months,

403
00:17:04,840 --> 00:17:08,679
Speaker 2: Come on. We then texted every few days in July

404
00:17:08,840 --> 00:17:11,879
Speaker 2: twenty twenty two and met up once with our partners,

405
00:17:11,960 --> 00:17:13,720
Speaker 2: with me sending the last message at the end of

406
00:17:13,760 --> 00:17:16,199
Speaker 2: the month, which wasn't replied to. I sent her another

407
00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:19,160
Speaker 2: message a month later, wishing her happy birthday, which again

408
00:17:19,440 --> 00:17:20,439
Speaker 2: I know reply on.

409
00:17:20,760 --> 00:17:23,520
Speaker 3: Not only is she is? What she's getting mad? At

410
00:17:23,520 --> 00:17:25,200
Speaker 3: op four she was doing.

411
00:17:25,280 --> 00:17:30,320
Speaker 2: She was actively distancing by not responding to messages, especially

412
00:17:30,400 --> 00:17:32,560
Speaker 2: birthday message. We then didn't talk at all for around

413
00:17:32,640 --> 00:17:35,240
Speaker 2: eighteen months. This wasn't on purpose, per se. I'm just

414
00:17:35,240 --> 00:17:37,440
Speaker 2: not the type of person to repeatedly message someone when

415
00:17:37,440 --> 00:17:39,760
Speaker 2: they haven't replied. Yea, So I reach out again in

416
00:17:39,840 --> 00:17:42,359
Speaker 2: jan twenty twenty four to see how she was and

417
00:17:42,440 --> 00:17:44,639
Speaker 2: catch up. She seemed delighted at the time. They hear

418
00:17:44,680 --> 00:17:46,920
Speaker 2: from me again and catch up. We then message every

419
00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:50,000
Speaker 2: so often up until this whole situation, and met up

420
00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:52,439
Speaker 2: once in July twenty twenty four. If you want to

421
00:17:52,520 --> 00:17:55,240
Speaker 2: virtually meet up, you can live on YouTube every weekday

422
00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,960
Speaker 2: at three PMPST. Just tab her profile, dab it. There's

423
00:17:58,000 --> 00:18:01,280
Speaker 2: another relevant update, but let's disc I think it's.

424
00:18:01,480 --> 00:18:03,840
Speaker 1: The same thoughts of just this person is not considerate

425
00:18:03,880 --> 00:18:06,560
Speaker 1: and sometimes you realize that your friends are not as

426
00:18:06,640 --> 00:18:09,440
Speaker 1: good of friends as you would have puped they were,

427
00:18:09,520 --> 00:18:10,080
Speaker 1: which is sad.

428
00:18:10,280 --> 00:18:12,800
Speaker 2: I just confused why a friend is putting it on

429
00:18:12,800 --> 00:18:15,320
Speaker 2: op I think that sometimes logic's missing.

430
00:18:15,520 --> 00:18:18,760
Speaker 1: Yeah. I think sometimes people just are not thinking logically

431
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,520
Speaker 1: and they are selfish and it sucks.

432
00:18:21,800 --> 00:18:24,439
Speaker 2: On that note, honestly, from this I feel like I

433
00:18:24,560 --> 00:18:27,200
Speaker 2: was more the one making the effort to maintain the friendship.

434
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:29,560
Speaker 2: I do take responsibility for the fact I could have

435
00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:32,199
Speaker 2: messaged her more than last month or two, but it

436
00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:35,600
Speaker 2: was always me sending the last message, repliable one which

437
00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:38,760
Speaker 2: was then left on delivered, short of sending repetitive messages

438
00:18:38,840 --> 00:18:42,159
Speaker 2: which may well have gone unanswered considering our chat history,

439
00:18:42,440 --> 00:18:44,199
Speaker 2: I'm not sure what I was expected to do, and

440
00:18:44,240 --> 00:18:44,879
Speaker 2: that's the end of that.

441
00:18:45,119 --> 00:18:45,960
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think.

442
00:18:46,040 --> 00:18:48,480
Speaker 1: There's not much else you could have done. I think

443
00:18:48,680 --> 00:18:51,000
Speaker 1: all of my friends are invited to a wedding that

444
00:18:51,119 --> 00:18:53,320
Speaker 1: I was specifically excluded from.

445
00:18:53,720 --> 00:18:56,440
Speaker 2: Don't invite them to your Christmas party.

446
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:59,040
Speaker 1: I twenty eight mail used to have a friend group

447
00:18:59,119 --> 00:19:01,520
Speaker 1: of about ten people back when we were in middle

448
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:04,520
Speaker 1: in high school. Then college happened and we all drifted apart.

449
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:07,040
Speaker 1: Nothing happened to make us drift apart, just growing up

450
00:19:07,040 --> 00:19:10,520
Speaker 1: and losing contact. Still friends, but not talk all the time,

451
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:13,439
Speaker 1: hang out regularly friends, if that makes sense. But of

452
00:19:13,520 --> 00:19:15,800
Speaker 1: course some of us stayed close friends with each other.

453
00:19:15,880 --> 00:19:18,119
Speaker 1: By the way, this comes from same file five oh

454
00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:20,840
Speaker 1: two on the OK storytime Separate it. So one person

455
00:19:20,880 --> 00:19:24,200
Speaker 1: from this friend group, Kayla fake name, twenty eight female

456
00:19:24,280 --> 00:19:26,440
Speaker 1: is getting married in a few weeks. I didn't get

457
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:29,160
Speaker 1: an invitation, but I wasn't hurt. I understood we didn't

458
00:19:29,200 --> 00:19:31,199
Speaker 1: stay close friends. But then I was hanging out with

459
00:19:31,240 --> 00:19:33,760
Speaker 1: my best friend Bob twenty eight male, who was also

460
00:19:33,800 --> 00:19:36,080
Speaker 1: in that friend group a few days ago, and he

461
00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:37,520
Speaker 1: mentioned that he's going to the wedding.

462
00:19:37,560 --> 00:19:37,879
Speaker 3: Oh.

463
00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:40,000
Speaker 1: I was a little surprised, but I just told him

464
00:19:40,040 --> 00:19:41,639
Speaker 1: I hope he had a good time. He asked if

465
00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:43,480
Speaker 1: I was going, and I told him no, I didn't

466
00:19:43,480 --> 00:19:44,119
Speaker 1: get an invite.

467
00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:47,520
Speaker 4: He said, sucks, you lose over.

468
00:19:48,080 --> 00:19:50,840
Speaker 1: He said that was strange because everyone else from the

469
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:53,399
Speaker 1: group was going, Oh damn, they don't like you.

470
00:19:53,680 --> 00:19:55,360
Speaker 3: Damn. Yes, seriously, this is targeted.

471
00:19:55,359 --> 00:19:57,640
Speaker 1: At this point, two of them were plus ones as

472
00:19:57,640 --> 00:19:59,639
Speaker 1: they were dating or married to other ones who got

473
00:19:59,680 --> 00:20:02,760
Speaker 1: an invite. But they were all going, and Kayla knewitt

474
00:20:02,800 --> 00:20:05,119
Speaker 1: and even told Bob she was really happy that the

475
00:20:05,160 --> 00:20:07,360
Speaker 1: gang was getting back together on her special day.

476
00:20:07,440 --> 00:20:09,159
Speaker 3: The part of the gang we like is getting back there.

477
00:20:09,280 --> 00:20:12,320
Speaker 1: Yeah, I told Bob. I was kind of hurt by that,

478
00:20:12,440 --> 00:20:14,080
Speaker 1: but I didn't want to make a big deal of it.

479
00:20:14,119 --> 00:20:18,000
Speaker 1: Two days past, Kayla calls me, fuming mad that I

480
00:20:18,119 --> 00:20:20,040
Speaker 1: was whining that I didn't get an invite to anybody

481
00:20:20,080 --> 00:20:22,640
Speaker 1: would listen. I told her that I wasn't. I explained

482
00:20:22,640 --> 00:20:24,560
Speaker 1: to her what happened. She said that she's been getting

483
00:20:24,600 --> 00:20:26,920
Speaker 1: texts and calls from other members of the group saying

484
00:20:26,960 --> 00:20:29,080
Speaker 1: that she should have included me and wanted me to

485
00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:30,760
Speaker 1: put a stop to it. I said I would do

486
00:20:30,840 --> 00:20:33,120
Speaker 1: my best and that I was sorry that I caused

487
00:20:33,160 --> 00:20:35,320
Speaker 1: her any trouble. She thanked me for the apology and

488
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:35,920
Speaker 1: the hung up.

489
00:20:35,920 --> 00:20:37,280
Speaker 3: Wait is that true?

490
00:20:37,440 --> 00:20:41,240
Speaker 1: No? Basically, so what happened I think is OP told Bob,

491
00:20:41,400 --> 00:20:43,239
Speaker 1: oh bummer, I wish I got an invite, and then

492
00:20:43,280 --> 00:20:46,879
Speaker 1: Bob goes and rallies the troops. He's like, oh, p

493
00:20:47,119 --> 00:20:52,200
Speaker 1: didn't get an invite, invite them invite him, and then

494
00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:54,680
Speaker 1: though the bride is coming back and saying, like, you're

495
00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,000
Speaker 1: telling everyone that I didn't invite.

496
00:20:56,760 --> 00:20:57,399
Speaker 4: You, blah bah oh.

497
00:20:57,560 --> 00:21:00,199
Speaker 2: So she said the texts are true, but they're from

498
00:21:00,280 --> 00:21:01,600
Speaker 2: the friend group that is texting her.

499
00:21:01,800 --> 00:21:04,520
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, and she thinks that like oh Pie sent them,

500
00:21:04,560 --> 00:21:07,800
Speaker 1: I guess, or like you know, rallied them. I called

501
00:21:07,840 --> 00:21:10,359
Speaker 1: Bob and asked him why he spread this around, and

502
00:21:10,440 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 1: he said that he didn't mean to. He felt bad

503
00:21:12,680 --> 00:21:14,280
Speaker 1: that I was hurt, and he wanted to ask someone

504
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:16,440
Speaker 1: else from the group if they knew why I was invited,

505
00:21:16,600 --> 00:21:19,600
Speaker 1: and she spread it around I guess, and everyone wanted

506
00:21:19,640 --> 00:21:22,159
Speaker 1: to know why Kayla cut me out specifically, so they

507
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:23,399
Speaker 1: started asking her a.

508
00:21:23,400 --> 00:21:26,160
Speaker 3: Little gossip, Little Jillian, the little gossip train.

509
00:21:26,359 --> 00:21:28,439
Speaker 1: So I made a Facebook group chat with all of

510
00:21:28,480 --> 00:21:30,960
Speaker 1: them and politely asked them to leave Kayla alone, that

511
00:21:31,040 --> 00:21:33,280
Speaker 1: I was just hurt in that moment and invented about

512
00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,359
Speaker 1: it to my best friend and that's where it should

513
00:21:35,400 --> 00:21:38,600
Speaker 1: have stayed. They all said okay and apologized.

514
00:21:38,000 --> 00:21:40,280
Speaker 3: To Kayla, but like, why isn't she invited? Yeah?

515
00:21:40,320 --> 00:21:41,920
Speaker 1: Why is op still not invited?

516
00:21:42,119 --> 00:21:43,760
Speaker 3: She was like, any guesses, I don't know.

517
00:21:43,880 --> 00:21:44,679
Speaker 1: Maybe he's like.

518
00:21:44,560 --> 00:21:45,440
Speaker 5: Maybe he's stinky.

519
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:51,880
Speaker 1: Maybe he's stinky. No, uh what, yeah, yeah, okay. Maybe

520
00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:56,240
Speaker 1: maybe the bride had a crush on him and it's like, oh,

521
00:21:56,280 --> 00:21:57,320
Speaker 1: he can't come to.

522
00:21:57,720 --> 00:21:58,880
Speaker 3: I think it's the stinky one.

523
00:21:59,560 --> 00:22:03,200
Speaker 5: I think maybe he's a spy.

524
00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:11,080
Speaker 1: On the spy. Yesterday, cayleb made a Facebook post ranting

525
00:22:11,119 --> 00:22:14,320
Speaker 1: about me without saying my name and said she had

526
00:22:14,359 --> 00:22:17,960
Speaker 1: to hire security and give them a photo to make

527
00:22:18,000 --> 00:22:22,200
Speaker 1: sure I didn't crash the Red God, something I would

528
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:25,600
Speaker 1: never do. The comments under the post were calling her out. Yes,

529
00:22:26,800 --> 00:22:29,359
Speaker 1: she called me again and screamed at me that I

530
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:31,760
Speaker 1: was ruining her wedding and told me that some of

531
00:22:31,800 --> 00:22:34,160
Speaker 1: the friends are considering not going to the wedding. Now, girl,

532
00:22:34,240 --> 00:22:35,200
Speaker 1: you did this to yourself.

533
00:22:35,240 --> 00:22:37,679
Speaker 4: How dare you make me make that post?

534
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:40,560
Speaker 1: I love that OPI said. One thing was like, oh bummer,

535
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:44,200
Speaker 1: I'm not invited the wedding and this is being like

536
00:22:44,440 --> 00:22:48,760
Speaker 1: pulled into this drama filled events that he was like,

537
00:22:48,800 --> 00:22:49,439
Speaker 1: I didn't do it.

538
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:55,080
Speaker 2: People respect you and people like you. You smell bad

539
00:22:55,160 --> 00:22:57,680
Speaker 2: like people. People like you though you're a people want

540
00:22:57,720 --> 00:22:58,080
Speaker 2: you there.

541
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:00,680
Speaker 1: And now I'm just wondering if I should have just

542
00:23:00,760 --> 00:23:03,080
Speaker 1: kept my mouth shut or stood up for myself or what.

543
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:05,440
Speaker 3: And there isn't edit at it time at a time.

544
00:23:05,720 --> 00:23:07,600
Speaker 1: Next day, I woke up to one hundred and sixty

545
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:10,000
Speaker 1: something notifications on this and I'm doing my best to

546
00:23:10,000 --> 00:23:12,399
Speaker 1: answer questions and all that I read it, but to

547
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:15,359
Speaker 1: answer some frequent questions and points I'm by. I have

548
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:17,679
Speaker 1: no knowledge of Kayla ever having a crush on me.

549
00:23:17,760 --> 00:23:20,040
Speaker 1: I don't know if her fiance is Garabye. I never

550
00:23:20,119 --> 00:23:22,480
Speaker 1: dated Kayla. I dated someone else from the group back

551
00:23:22,480 --> 00:23:25,679
Speaker 1: in high school in college, but the relationship ended amicably

552
00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:28,240
Speaker 1: and I'm still good friends with her. The only notable

553
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:30,960
Speaker 1: event that might have made things weird is that we

554
00:23:31,040 --> 00:23:34,720
Speaker 1: all went skinny dipping ones when we were sixteen, But

555
00:23:34,800 --> 00:23:37,280
Speaker 1: nothing else really happened there, and as far as I know,

556
00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:39,200
Speaker 1: nobody was creeped out or anything by it.

557
00:23:39,920 --> 00:23:41,400
Speaker 3: Before you mentioned the bye thing?

558
00:23:41,520 --> 00:23:45,639
Speaker 2: Yeah someone Aaron Nicolson question mark possibly, but like you

559
00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:46,399
Speaker 2: didn't even mention the.

560
00:23:46,400 --> 00:23:47,040
Speaker 3: Bye thing yet?

561
00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:48,040
Speaker 1: How did you know?

562
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:51,840
Speaker 3: I mean, I'm like curious if it said anything in

563
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:52,280
Speaker 3: the story.

564
00:23:52,400 --> 00:23:54,880
Speaker 1: I don't think so. Huh. There was no big political

565
00:23:54,880 --> 00:23:56,960
Speaker 1: shift in any of us that may have divided us.

566
00:23:57,119 --> 00:24:00,600
Speaker 1: Update one, Do you have any thoughts before we jump

567
00:24:00,640 --> 00:24:01,000
Speaker 1: into this?

568
00:24:01,200 --> 00:24:02,160
Speaker 3: I just want to know.

569
00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:06,919
Speaker 1: I just need to know why Kayla won't invite OP. Yeah, anyway,

570
00:24:07,119 --> 00:24:09,639
Speaker 1: I finally got an answer to why I wasn't invited

571
00:24:09,720 --> 00:24:12,200
Speaker 1: the wedding. Put your thoughts in the comments real quick,

572
00:24:12,280 --> 00:24:14,240
Speaker 1: get them out there.

573
00:24:14,800 --> 00:24:19,600
Speaker 5: Spy, stinky spy, no spy spy.

574
00:24:19,640 --> 00:24:19,800
Speaker 2: I know.

575
00:24:20,000 --> 00:24:21,840
Speaker 6: I think I think someone else at the wedding. I

576
00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:26,640
Speaker 6: think someone does not like OP for some odd reason.

577
00:24:26,680 --> 00:24:28,840
Speaker 6: We don't know the exact reason. But someone doesn't like OPI.

578
00:24:28,920 --> 00:24:31,440
Speaker 6: That's this is the reason. Is it the fiance? Is

579
00:24:31,480 --> 00:24:32,879
Speaker 6: I mean, is it the bride or the groom? But

580
00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:33,320
Speaker 6: we don't know.

581
00:24:33,480 --> 00:24:35,560
Speaker 2: I think it's like somebody that's very important in this

582
00:24:35,600 --> 00:24:38,159
Speaker 2: wedding is not like you don't think the bride just

583
00:24:38,160 --> 00:24:43,520
Speaker 2: doesn't like M Possibly, I just think overall someone Haley, Yeah,

584
00:24:43,520 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 2: someone really hates OPI for some stupid reason.

585
00:24:46,640 --> 00:24:49,280
Speaker 1: Turns out that someone else from the group named Samantha

586
00:24:49,440 --> 00:24:52,080
Speaker 1: again fake names all around, has had a crush on

587
00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:55,040
Speaker 1: me for years. I was close. I was close.

588
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:55,920
Speaker 4: Oh.

589
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:57,760
Speaker 1: I said that maybe the bride had a crush on him.

590
00:24:57,880 --> 00:24:59,439
Speaker 3: Oh okay, but it's.

591
00:24:59,280 --> 00:25:01,199
Speaker 1: Been too afraid to tell me or act on it.

592
00:25:01,320 --> 00:25:03,639
Speaker 1: Samantha was in the bridal party of Kayla's wedding and

593
00:25:03,680 --> 00:25:05,760
Speaker 1: told Kayla that she was finally going to make a

594
00:25:05,800 --> 00:25:08,840
Speaker 1: move on me at the wedding after all her bridal

595
00:25:08,880 --> 00:25:10,320
Speaker 1: party duties were taken care of.

596
00:25:11,240 --> 00:25:14,159
Speaker 3: Wait, so Kayla was cog blocking cock blocking.

597
00:25:14,160 --> 00:25:15,399
Speaker 1: That's what I was gonna say, but I wasn't sure

598
00:25:15,400 --> 00:25:15,960
Speaker 1: if I could say it.

599
00:25:16,080 --> 00:25:16,560
Speaker 3: I said it.

600
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,080
Speaker 1: Kayla didn't like this and thinks that I'm not good.

601
00:25:19,040 --> 00:25:24,159
Speaker 2: Enough for Samantha, so someone didn't like her, but she

602
00:25:24,240 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 2: didn't say anything and decided to just not invite me

603
00:25:26,880 --> 00:25:28,560
Speaker 2: and Hope Samantha dropped it.

604
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:29,240
Speaker 3: Wow.

605
00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 1: But when Samantha heard about me not being invited, she

606
00:25:33,359 --> 00:25:38,000
Speaker 1: could smell the BS and confronted Kayla, knowing exactly why

607
00:25:38,040 --> 00:25:40,160
Speaker 1: I was invited, and said she wasn't sure she wanted

608
00:25:40,200 --> 00:25:42,240
Speaker 1: to be in the bridal party after Kayla would do

609
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:43,400
Speaker 1: something like this to her.

610
00:25:43,600 --> 00:25:45,919
Speaker 5: So I was right, thank you, you were right. I

611
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:48,800
Speaker 5: didn't Yeah, I was like, someone doesn't like one doesn't.

612
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:51,399
Speaker 1: Like Ope, and I said, weiss Cayla, Why are you

613
00:25:51,480 --> 00:25:54,440
Speaker 1: a hater? That's when Kayla called me, Oh my god

614
00:25:54,680 --> 00:25:57,440
Speaker 1: and flipped out the first time after the group chat

615
00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:59,720
Speaker 1: where I asked them to stop. Samantha was so upset

616
00:25:59,720 --> 00:26:01,720
Speaker 1: that she did drop out of the bridal party, and

617
00:26:01,760 --> 00:26:04,680
Speaker 1: that prompted the second phone call to blow up to me.

618
00:26:04,880 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 1: Samantha called me this afternoon and told me all this.

619
00:26:07,440 --> 00:26:07,800
Speaker 3: Damn.

620
00:26:07,920 --> 00:26:09,840
Speaker 1: Did she confess her feelings? Oh?

621
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:13,240
Speaker 3: Did she confess you a little confession here?

622
00:26:13,480 --> 00:26:15,919
Speaker 1: Oh, I apologize for all the BS and ask me

623
00:26:16,000 --> 00:26:20,040
Speaker 1: out for dinner On the night of the wedding, smooth,

624
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:24,919
Speaker 1: Samantha smooth, and I accept it. Edit girl, Oh, this

625
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,560
Speaker 1: might seem petty to go out on the night of

626
00:26:26,600 --> 00:26:29,160
Speaker 1: the wedding, but it was Samantha's idea. And also Kayla

627
00:26:29,240 --> 00:26:32,159
Speaker 1: is batcrap crazy and her number and social media is

628
00:26:32,359 --> 00:26:34,360
Speaker 1: a lot, so I can't get any more calls if

629
00:26:34,359 --> 00:26:37,280
Speaker 1: she blows up the third time. There is another update.

630
00:26:38,000 --> 00:26:38,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, are you?

631
00:26:39,600 --> 00:26:39,800
Speaker 5: Are you?

632
00:26:39,840 --> 00:26:40,360
Speaker 1: And Samantha?

633
00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:41,960
Speaker 3: Is this Samantha?

634
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:45,160
Speaker 1: Maybe it's both. Kimberly Fiez is get it girl? Yeah,

635
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:46,720
Speaker 1: Samantha is living out her dream.

636
00:26:46,800 --> 00:26:46,960
Speaker 5: Yes.

637
00:26:47,560 --> 00:26:49,960
Speaker 1: I also love that she was like, hey, okay, just

638
00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:52,560
Speaker 1: want to let you know Kayla attacked you because I'm

639
00:26:52,600 --> 00:26:54,679
Speaker 1: in you. I'm into you. What do you think about that?

640
00:26:56,560 --> 00:26:57,359
Speaker 1: Do you want to go out?

641
00:26:58,160 --> 00:26:58,639
Speaker 5: You into this?

642
00:26:58,760 --> 00:26:59,720
Speaker 1: Well, she's getting married.

643
00:27:01,359 --> 00:27:04,760
Speaker 5: You give the note one for yes, two free yes,

644
00:27:05,040 --> 00:27:07,240
Speaker 5: three for please say yes, say yes.

645
00:27:07,720 --> 00:27:10,040
Speaker 1: But there is another update hit it the wedding and

646
00:27:10,119 --> 00:27:12,399
Speaker 1: my date with Sam is next weekend, so expect that

647
00:27:12,520 --> 00:27:16,080
Speaker 1: big update after that. Sam is considering slash joking, not

648
00:27:16,119 --> 00:27:18,920
Speaker 1: sure which that she's going to wear her bridesmaid's dress

649
00:27:18,960 --> 00:27:21,080
Speaker 1: to the date because she loves the color. She already

650
00:27:21,080 --> 00:27:23,600
Speaker 1: prayed for it, and my tits look fantastic in it.

651
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,119
Speaker 1: Ssmith is confident and I love that.

652
00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:29,080
Speaker 3: What's up with Samantha? She what's over there?

653
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:35,640
Speaker 1: I'm a little worried that's too shoving it in Kayla's face,

654
00:27:35,760 --> 00:27:38,640
Speaker 1: but Sam says she deserves it. I also asked Sam

655
00:27:38,640 --> 00:27:40,840
Speaker 1: if she would be willing to write her own pob here,

656
00:27:40,880 --> 00:27:42,679
Speaker 1: and she said she would love to and that she

657
00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:45,320
Speaker 1: will after our date when we go back to my place.

658
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:48,520
Speaker 3: Whoa coming on wrong, Samantha?

659
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:49,520
Speaker 5: This is wild?

660
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:52,800
Speaker 1: Also, Kayla actually sent me a letter in the mail

661
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:55,520
Speaker 1: apologizing and asking to unblock her so we can talk

662
00:27:55,520 --> 00:27:58,200
Speaker 1: about this and heal the loose ends. I didn't block her.

663
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:01,080
Speaker 1: Sam is completely certain that she's only trying to apologize

664
00:28:01,119 --> 00:28:02,800
Speaker 1: so that I'll tell the other four friends who have

665
00:28:02,880 --> 00:28:04,800
Speaker 1: dropped out of the wedding to attend it. And there

666
00:28:04,840 --> 00:28:07,200
Speaker 1: is another update up update anyway. Update. Out of the

667
00:28:07,240 --> 00:28:09,480
Speaker 1: ten people that were in the friend group, four went

668
00:28:09,520 --> 00:28:12,160
Speaker 1: to the wedding. Those are four haters, right there? Four

669
00:28:12,200 --> 00:28:16,840
Speaker 1: people who didn't stand biop Kayla of course, one that

670
00:28:17,000 --> 00:28:20,280
Speaker 1: is Kayla's cousin but still sides with me, her partner,

671
00:28:20,320 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 1: and another whose mom is best friend with Kayla's mom

672
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:26,520
Speaker 1: and would absolutely end me if I didn't go. Despite

673
00:28:26,520 --> 00:28:29,280
Speaker 1: all this, BS, Sam as cayleb blocked on everything, but

674
00:28:29,359 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 1: Kayla has sent her three written letters trying to convince

675
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,800
Speaker 1: her to reconsider dropping out of the wedding, and shown

676
00:28:34,840 --> 00:28:37,520
Speaker 1: up at Kayla's house twice to try in person. Sam

677
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:40,640
Speaker 1: burned all three letters and didn't answer the door both times,

678
00:28:40,720 --> 00:28:42,840
Speaker 1: but told Kyla through the door the second time that

679
00:28:42,920 --> 00:28:46,360
Speaker 1: if she didn't go away, Sam would call the cops.

680
00:28:46,920 --> 00:28:49,400
Speaker 1: Kyla called her an ungrateful skank and ran away.

681
00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:51,320
Speaker 5: WHOA, she's like you, skank.

682
00:28:53,000 --> 00:28:55,120
Speaker 1: While the wedding was going on, the three friends at

683
00:28:55,160 --> 00:28:57,480
Speaker 1: the wedding were leaking infos of Sam and I in

684
00:28:57,560 --> 00:29:00,240
Speaker 1: a group chat. This is so funny.

685
00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:01,800
Speaker 4: This is so funny.

686
00:29:01,880 --> 00:29:04,800
Speaker 1: There's like a side plot. I kind of love that

687
00:29:04,960 --> 00:29:07,560
Speaker 1: Kayla replaced Sam in the wedding party with another cousin

688
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:09,520
Speaker 1: in a dress that didn't match the others.

689
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:10,600
Speaker 3: Oh.

690
00:29:10,680 --> 00:29:13,640
Speaker 1: Cayla seemed happy throughout the wedding, and honestly, despite all this,

691
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:15,680
Speaker 1: I'm happy that she was happy at her wedding, or

692
00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:18,280
Speaker 1: at least pretended to be happy. As Sam said, she

693
00:29:18,360 --> 00:29:21,080
Speaker 1: might be doing no big drama or blow up or

694
00:29:21,120 --> 00:29:23,680
Speaker 1: anything happened at the wedding, and Kayla and her husband

695
00:29:23,720 --> 00:29:25,920
Speaker 1: are off to a honeymoon and why, which I don't

696
00:29:25,960 --> 00:29:28,200
Speaker 1: know how well that's going to go with the wildfires

697
00:29:28,240 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 1: going on there right now. Now to the date, it

698
00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:32,760
Speaker 1: went very very well.

699
00:29:33,120 --> 00:29:41,600
Speaker 7: No you don't know, no, no, guys, no, no, no,

700
00:29:42,080 --> 00:29:43,160
Speaker 7: this is the last story of the day.

701
00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:43,600
Speaker 5: Come on.

702
00:29:44,000 --> 00:29:47,240
Speaker 1: We met up at a Korean BBQ place that I

703
00:29:47,280 --> 00:29:49,440
Speaker 1: said was good and we just had a great time

704
00:29:49,520 --> 00:29:52,040
Speaker 1: talking about the past. How long she's had a crush

705
00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 1: on me since she took this moment. Yeah, you know,

706
00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:00,920
Speaker 1: Kyla kind of helps you, common enemy.

707
00:30:01,080 --> 00:30:03,160
Speaker 5: She got some meat and then.

708
00:30:03,120 --> 00:30:07,800
Speaker 1: Okay, talking about the Kayla situations and just all sorts

709
00:30:07,800 --> 00:30:11,760
Speaker 1: of stuff. Afterwards, we went back to my place. Okay,

710
00:30:12,280 --> 00:30:12,800
Speaker 1: these are.

711
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:17,240
Speaker 2: Just a lope and Gibraltar, these people have good Gibraltar, funny.

712
00:30:17,160 --> 00:30:19,800
Speaker 1: Hell, yes, off the coast of Spain, which we all.

713
00:30:19,680 --> 00:30:20,680
Speaker 3: Know, which we all know.

714
00:30:21,280 --> 00:30:24,160
Speaker 1: Afterwards, we went back to my place and spent the

715
00:30:24,280 --> 00:30:32,840
Speaker 1: night together, fast and all day. The next day she

716
00:30:32,880 --> 00:30:35,880
Speaker 1: read these Reddit posts and a bunch of comments. I

717
00:30:35,880 --> 00:30:37,840
Speaker 1: said she could make her own account to post her POV,

718
00:30:38,080 --> 00:30:39,840
Speaker 1: or I could just let her use this one, and

719
00:30:39,880 --> 00:30:41,760
Speaker 1: she said she would text me or POV and I

720
00:30:41,760 --> 00:30:43,800
Speaker 1: could just copy and paste it here. So that's what

721
00:30:43,840 --> 00:30:44,880
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do under this.

722
00:30:45,120 --> 00:30:46,040
Speaker 3: But how was the night?

723
00:30:46,360 --> 00:30:47,000
Speaker 1: That's what I want to know.

724
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:48,960
Speaker 3: We want them forth in details.

725
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:50,840
Speaker 1: Sam and I have a few more dates lined up,

726
00:30:50,920 --> 00:30:53,640
Speaker 1: and the others from the group know about Kayla's reason

727
00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:56,080
Speaker 1: for excluding me from the wedding and are cheering us.

728
00:30:57,040 --> 00:31:00,160
Speaker 1: Really happy that this came out of a bad situation,

729
00:31:00,400 --> 00:31:02,720
Speaker 1: thanks to everyone who assured me I wasn't in the wrong,

730
00:31:02,960 --> 00:31:05,040
Speaker 1: cheered me on through this and made me laugh with

731
00:31:05,120 --> 00:31:07,960
Speaker 1: funny comments after I was feeling pretty down and felt

732
00:31:08,000 --> 00:31:09,920
Speaker 1: like an a hole that ruined his friend's wedding when

733
00:31:09,960 --> 00:31:12,240
Speaker 1: I clearly didn't do anything wrong and this just kind

734
00:31:12,280 --> 00:31:14,320
Speaker 1: of happened to me and I handled it as best

735
00:31:14,360 --> 00:31:16,160
Speaker 1: I could. Sam's POV.

736
00:31:17,000 --> 00:31:17,680
Speaker 3: How much longer?

737
00:31:18,120 --> 00:31:21,480
Speaker 1: Not that much longer? I think this is the end. No,

738
00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:23,880
Speaker 1: it's just Sam's man. Oh man, but this is really cute.

739
00:31:23,920 --> 00:31:25,960
Speaker 1: This really worked out for everyone for Kayla.

740
00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:28,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, right out of anything that could have come from,

741
00:31:28,400 --> 00:31:31,200
Speaker 2: like not being invited to wedding and then all this drama.

742
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 3: New Love.

743
00:31:33,720 --> 00:31:39,520
Speaker 1: A beautiful night spent with New Love. Sam's POV hey

744
00:31:39,560 --> 00:31:42,640
Speaker 1: read it. I'm Sam. He never gave himself a fake name,

745
00:31:42,720 --> 00:31:44,840
Speaker 1: so I'll call him Skipper. I've had a crush on

746
00:31:44,920 --> 00:31:48,240
Speaker 1: Skipper since about sixth grade, but never acted on it

747
00:31:48,280 --> 00:31:51,400
Speaker 1: for various reasons, such is my fear of rejection. He

748
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:53,239
Speaker 1: was dating my friend for a while, I thought he

749
00:31:53,280 --> 00:31:55,760
Speaker 1: was gay, things like that. But when Cayleb was getting married,

750
00:31:55,840 --> 00:31:58,880
Speaker 1: I saw an opportunity to finally go for it. Then

751
00:31:59,040 --> 00:32:02,120
Speaker 1: I got my bridesmaids and saw how incredible I looked

752
00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:04,800
Speaker 1: in at and that solidified my drive to make a

753
00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:08,200
Speaker 1: move on Skipper. I was so excited that I told

754
00:32:08,320 --> 00:32:10,520
Speaker 1: Kayla about this, and she smiled and said she was

755
00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:12,320
Speaker 1: happy for me. I took that to me and she

756
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:14,760
Speaker 1: was cool with it. Then some time passes and I

757
00:32:14,800 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 1: get word from one of our friends that Skipper was

758
00:32:17,280 --> 00:32:20,200
Speaker 1: not invited, and I was suspicious right away. Kayla was

759
00:32:20,240 --> 00:32:22,680
Speaker 1: one of my best friends growing up and I love her,

760
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:25,360
Speaker 1: but she's always had this underhanded side to her, and

761
00:32:25,400 --> 00:32:28,440
Speaker 1: I suspected that my plan was the reason Skipper wasn't invited,

762
00:32:28,600 --> 00:32:30,560
Speaker 1: so I asked her about it. She tried to dodge

763
00:32:30,560 --> 00:32:34,040
Speaker 1: the question and manipulate me, but finally she just admitted

764
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:36,760
Speaker 1: it and told me that Skipper wasn't good enough for me.

765
00:32:36,920 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 1: I was furious and told her I was extremely hurt

766
00:32:40,160 --> 00:32:41,880
Speaker 1: that she would do something like this to me and

767
00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:43,840
Speaker 1: that I wasn't sure I wanted to be your bride's

768
00:32:43,840 --> 00:32:46,520
Speaker 1: man anymore. She screamed at me and hung up. Later,

769
00:32:46,640 --> 00:32:48,200
Speaker 1: I was added to a group chat with the other

770
00:32:48,240 --> 00:32:50,280
Speaker 1: members of the group, and Skipper asked us all to

771
00:32:50,360 --> 00:32:52,680
Speaker 1: drop whatever we were saying to Kayla, and I just

772
00:32:52,760 --> 00:32:55,840
Speaker 1: knew that Kayla had to beat him out about this,

773
00:32:56,120 --> 00:32:58,440
Speaker 1: that I wanted to respect what Skipper was asking us

774
00:32:58,440 --> 00:33:00,840
Speaker 1: to do and keep the peace, so I kept my

775
00:33:00,960 --> 00:33:03,720
Speaker 1: mouth shut. But then Cayla made that Facebook post and

776
00:33:03,760 --> 00:33:06,480
Speaker 1: I was so upset that I called her and dropped

777
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:08,600
Speaker 1: out of the wedding. I understand that's when she called

778
00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:11,480
Speaker 1: Skipper and screamed at him the second time. A day

779
00:33:11,560 --> 00:33:14,040
Speaker 1: or two passes and I call Skipper and tell him

780
00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:16,600
Speaker 1: what happened and ask him out. He says, yes. Kayla

781
00:33:16,680 --> 00:33:19,440
Speaker 1: harasses me for a while and text calls, letters, and

782
00:33:19,560 --> 00:33:21,480
Speaker 1: showing up at my house until I block her on

783
00:33:21,560 --> 00:33:23,760
Speaker 1: everything and threatened to call the cops on her. The

784
00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:27,040
Speaker 1: date went amazingly well and Skipper is an amazing man

785
00:33:27,120 --> 00:33:29,640
Speaker 1: that I'm so glad I finally asked him out. I

786
00:33:29,720 --> 00:33:31,680
Speaker 1: read some of your comments, and I don't know if

787
00:33:31,720 --> 00:33:33,640
Speaker 1: Kayla was trying to set me up with someone else.

788
00:33:33,800 --> 00:33:35,960
Speaker 1: She never said so or alluded to it. I don't

789
00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:38,120
Speaker 1: think Kyla has a crush on me or Skipper. We

790
00:33:38,120 --> 00:33:40,840
Speaker 1: were close friends for decades now and she never said

791
00:33:40,880 --> 00:33:44,240
Speaker 1: anything to indicate that. And finally, some of you asked

792
00:33:44,280 --> 00:33:46,200
Speaker 1: me to post a photo of myself in the dress.

793
00:33:46,360 --> 00:33:49,200
Speaker 1: I'm not comfortable doing that. I look amazing in it,

794
00:33:49,280 --> 00:33:51,840
Speaker 1: but I'm just not comfortable posting my photos of myself

795
00:33:51,880 --> 00:33:54,640
Speaker 1: all over the internet, especially connected to a story like

796
00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:57,320
Speaker 1: this where it would be easy to connect the dots

797
00:33:57,360 --> 00:33:59,880
Speaker 1: and probably find out my real name and things like that.

798
00:34:00,080 --> 00:34:02,280
Speaker 1: But you can find the re less if you join

799
00:34:02,400 --> 00:34:04,960
Speaker 1: us live every weekday three PMPSD on YouTube. Just tap

800
00:34:04,960 --> 00:34:07,040
Speaker 1: her profile. Yeah, and there is just a teeny bit

801
00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:09,040
Speaker 1: left to the story, but I think it's all worked out.

802
00:34:09,080 --> 00:34:09,239
Speaker 4: Well.

803
00:34:09,480 --> 00:34:10,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, this all's well, that ends well.

804
00:34:11,000 --> 00:34:14,160
Speaker 5: I just don't know why Kayla. Kayla is so hung

805
00:34:14,280 --> 00:34:15,919
Speaker 5: up on opls.

806
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 3: What jealous the.

807
00:34:18,560 --> 00:34:21,560
Speaker 5: Same as like she's getting like all this stuff that's

808
00:34:21,560 --> 00:34:25,719
Speaker 5: happening for her and that's great. Why, yeah, I wanted

809
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:28,040
Speaker 5: to see why Kayla is just so hung up on bitter.

810
00:34:28,840 --> 00:34:31,600
Speaker 1: I think sometimes, especially when you have, like you know,

811
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,200
Speaker 1: friends that you've had for a long time, you kind

812
00:34:34,239 --> 00:34:37,439
Speaker 1: of give them a little bit more leeway. In this case,

813
00:34:37,480 --> 00:34:40,680
Speaker 1: it seems like Kayla was has always maybe had this

814
00:34:40,760 --> 00:34:43,239
Speaker 1: kind of controlling tendency need to be kind of the

815
00:34:43,320 --> 00:34:46,320
Speaker 1: leader of the group. And this is just one instance

816
00:34:46,360 --> 00:34:48,360
Speaker 1: where she was trying to, you know, control what Samantha

817
00:34:48,480 --> 00:34:50,200
Speaker 1: was doing. But there's a little bit left. But thanks

818
00:34:50,200 --> 00:34:52,399
Speaker 1: to everyone that told Skipper he wasn't an a hole

819
00:34:52,440 --> 00:34:54,520
Speaker 1: and cheered him on once they found out that I exist,

820
00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:56,839
Speaker 1: and then I was the drama nexus. And as many

821
00:34:56,920 --> 00:34:59,560
Speaker 1: of you said, I promise that if this relationship goes

822
00:34:59,560 --> 00:35:00,399
Speaker 1: well and we end.

823
00:35:00,360 --> 00:35:02,760
Speaker 3: Up getting married, damn married.

824
00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:05,360
Speaker 4: You're bold, girl, You're bold.

825
00:35:05,440 --> 00:35:08,319
Speaker 3: She wants what she wants, I guess so, and she's

826
00:35:08,320 --> 00:35:08,799
Speaker 3: sang it.

827
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:12,480
Speaker 1: For yes to put She's gonna.

828
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:15,560
Speaker 5: Read that she's had a crush on him. I know,

829
00:35:16,200 --> 00:35:16,880
Speaker 5: like day.

830
00:35:16,800 --> 00:35:21,560
Speaker 1: One, Kayla will be as far from it as humanly possible.

831
00:35:21,640 --> 00:35:23,680
Speaker 1: And that is the end of that story.

832
00:35:23,880 --> 00:35:28,080
Speaker 8: I planned my best friend's wedding, but she doesn't want

833
00:35:28,120 --> 00:35:29,680
Speaker 8: to include my kids.

834
00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:31,440
Speaker 5: The kids ain't going. You ain't going.

835
00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:34,000
Speaker 4: That's right, my kids did. Now you're a package deal.

836
00:35:34,239 --> 00:35:38,960
Speaker 8: This is a story about my female best friend of

837
00:35:39,080 --> 00:35:41,400
Speaker 8: five years at the time, who was also related to

838
00:35:41,400 --> 00:35:45,160
Speaker 8: my husband, and her wedding. This is my involvement and

839
00:35:45,280 --> 00:35:47,880
Speaker 8: what happened after it. By the way, this comes from

840
00:35:48,000 --> 00:35:50,400
Speaker 8: user I lived the Life of Drama on the r

841
00:35:50,440 --> 00:35:52,360
Speaker 8: slash okay storytime subreddit.

842
00:35:52,719 --> 00:35:54,800
Speaker 4: So here's the relationship background.

843
00:35:54,880 --> 00:35:59,080
Speaker 8: I met my husband's female relative D, who we will

844
00:35:59,080 --> 00:36:03,600
Speaker 8: call Denise a couple of times before we first started dating.

845
00:36:03,880 --> 00:36:06,640
Speaker 4: She and I being the same age.

846
00:36:06,640 --> 00:36:09,160
Speaker 8: And her suddenly visiting us a lot to date a

847
00:36:09,160 --> 00:36:12,160
Speaker 8: friend of ours, Jay will be known as Jack, who

848
00:36:12,200 --> 00:36:15,520
Speaker 8: we had all met through my husband's brother, meant that

849
00:36:15,600 --> 00:36:18,759
Speaker 8: we all got really close. Okay, so they all ended

850
00:36:18,840 --> 00:36:22,799
Speaker 8: up in the same circle. We soon became bff's. I

851
00:36:22,920 --> 00:36:27,240
Speaker 8: get married, Denise and Jack attend the wedding. A year later,

852
00:36:27,400 --> 00:36:30,640
Speaker 8: I have my first child, who becomes their godson. D

853
00:36:30,760 --> 00:36:33,880
Speaker 8: and J are there for my marriage issues, my grad school,

854
00:36:33,960 --> 00:36:37,160
Speaker 8: my pregnancy and my birth, the life of my child,

855
00:36:37,600 --> 00:36:38,440
Speaker 8: the loss.

856
00:36:38,120 --> 00:36:40,880
Speaker 4: Of our dogs, etc. They're there for us for a

857
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:41,400
Speaker 4: lot of stuff.

858
00:36:41,400 --> 00:36:42,640
Speaker 5: Shout out to Denise and Jack.

859
00:36:42,719 --> 00:36:45,600
Speaker 8: Denise drops out of school and doesn't want to move

860
00:36:45,680 --> 00:36:47,759
Speaker 8: back in with her parents out of town, so she

861
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:50,560
Speaker 8: lived with us for a few months free of course,

862
00:36:51,040 --> 00:36:54,240
Speaker 8: and after she finally moved in with Jack, who lived

863
00:36:54,280 --> 00:36:57,200
Speaker 8: with housemates not too far from us, they would come

864
00:36:57,239 --> 00:37:00,160
Speaker 8: over daily. Both of them were not working and they

865
00:37:00,200 --> 00:37:03,040
Speaker 8: basically lived with us during the day. I fed and

866
00:37:03,239 --> 00:37:06,320
Speaker 8: entertained them for free, as they are very good friends.

867
00:37:06,480 --> 00:37:08,320
Speaker 4: But being a first time mom and wanting.

868
00:37:08,120 --> 00:37:10,359
Speaker 8: To take care of my baby, I quit working and

869
00:37:10,440 --> 00:37:13,480
Speaker 8: so I depended on my savings and my spouse.

870
00:37:13,640 --> 00:37:15,040
Speaker 4: Now here's the wedding story.

871
00:37:15,120 --> 00:37:19,640
Speaker 8: Okay, Denise and Jack, we're planning for an overseas wedding

872
00:37:19,880 --> 00:37:22,719
Speaker 8: since all of his relatives lived there except for his

873
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:26,400
Speaker 8: parents in the United States. We already got our passports

874
00:37:26,520 --> 00:37:31,319
Speaker 8: ready to go. We planned hotels, locations, et cetera. They

875
00:37:31,320 --> 00:37:33,920
Speaker 8: were going to have a wedding reception here for her side,

876
00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:37,640
Speaker 8: and the ceremony would be held overseas with another reception.

877
00:37:38,200 --> 00:37:41,920
Speaker 4: They already expected her family members not going overseas.

878
00:37:42,360 --> 00:37:45,920
Speaker 8: Being close friends with Jack as well, and since they

879
00:37:45,960 --> 00:37:49,040
Speaker 8: both weren't working at the time, I ended up being

880
00:37:49,080 --> 00:37:51,760
Speaker 8: the wedding planner and the maid of honor.

881
00:37:51,840 --> 00:37:53,520
Speaker 5: It's a lot of okay, so you got a little

882
00:37:53,640 --> 00:37:54,759
Speaker 5: rusher on your shoulders there.

883
00:37:54,800 --> 00:37:58,200
Speaker 8: Shortly after we found out I was pregnant with my

884
00:37:58,360 --> 00:38:01,040
Speaker 8: second child, I was still worse working full time with

885
00:38:01,160 --> 00:38:04,160
Speaker 8: a toddler. I found the banquet hall, the photographer, the DJ,

886
00:38:04,680 --> 00:38:09,240
Speaker 8: gift favors, decorations, et cetera. I spent endless hours on Pinterest,

887
00:38:09,320 --> 00:38:13,720
Speaker 8: calling and following up with people in places, creating spreadsheets

888
00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:17,360
Speaker 8: and budgeting for them, creating a wedding video, spending my

889
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:20,919
Speaker 8: own money for things, spending time folding tiny.

890
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:22,400
Speaker 4: Gift boxes and decorating.

891
00:38:22,840 --> 00:38:25,560
Speaker 8: They were in charge of their own outfits, the guest lists,

892
00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:28,200
Speaker 8: and the caterer. It doesn't seem like an even distribution

893
00:38:28,440 --> 00:38:29,520
Speaker 8: of responsibility.

894
00:38:29,600 --> 00:38:32,640
Speaker 5: It s sounds like it's only your responsibility. Plus you

895
00:38:32,719 --> 00:38:34,880
Speaker 5: have a child. I don't think they understand how much

896
00:38:34,880 --> 00:38:36,000
Speaker 5: stress you got going on.

897
00:38:36,120 --> 00:38:38,120
Speaker 4: That's not a very chill move of them.

898
00:38:38,160 --> 00:38:40,880
Speaker 8: We got a block of rooms at a hotel together

899
00:38:41,040 --> 00:38:44,719
Speaker 8: and hold the wedding where her parents live, so we

900
00:38:44,800 --> 00:38:48,520
Speaker 8: all had to travel. I give birth three months before

901
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:52,000
Speaker 8: the wedding. A month before the wedding, Denise tells me,

902
00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:55,120
Speaker 8: it is a no kid's wedding. That is nowhere near

903
00:38:55,239 --> 00:38:55,759
Speaker 8: enough time.

904
00:38:56,000 --> 00:38:59,440
Speaker 5: Again, we know the rules. If it's your wedding, your rules,

905
00:38:59,520 --> 00:39:02,480
Speaker 5: the rules, but at least have some courtesy.

906
00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:04,360
Speaker 8: Well, I mean, sure, if you want to have the

907
00:39:04,360 --> 00:39:07,239
Speaker 8: wedding be no kids, that's one thing. Maybe allow the

908
00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:10,400
Speaker 8: one person who planned your entire wedding to bring their kids,

909
00:39:10,560 --> 00:39:12,759
Speaker 8: seeing as the wedding wouldn't have happened without them.

910
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:14,759
Speaker 5: That's too reasonable for Denise.

911
00:39:14,480 --> 00:39:16,920
Speaker 4: Because the only thing you're doing by saying no kids.

912
00:39:17,120 --> 00:39:20,520
Speaker 8: To the people who just literally had a newborn baby

913
00:39:20,520 --> 00:39:22,640
Speaker 8: three months ago, you're telling them you can't go.

914
00:39:22,880 --> 00:39:25,200
Speaker 3: Don't forget OPI housed Denise.

915
00:39:25,400 --> 00:39:29,359
Speaker 8: Oh, Denis, Denise, where's the justice. There're better be justice

916
00:39:29,360 --> 00:39:33,000
Speaker 8: coming up here, hope. So anyways, OPI says it's their wedding,

917
00:39:33,239 --> 00:39:36,960
Speaker 8: so I'm okay with that choice. I also exclusively breastfeed,

918
00:39:37,000 --> 00:39:39,480
Speaker 8: and they knew this with my first as well. I

919
00:39:39,600 --> 00:39:42,040
Speaker 8: ended up running late to the reception and they start

920
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:45,400
Speaker 8: the solo photos first to accommodate the group photos of

921
00:39:45,440 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 8: wedding party members. I felt horrible for not being there

922
00:39:48,160 --> 00:39:50,360
Speaker 8: to greet guests, but I had to run back to

923
00:39:50,400 --> 00:39:52,359
Speaker 8: feed my baby and get back in time.

924
00:39:52,560 --> 00:39:55,719
Speaker 4: You shouldn't feel horrible for that. You have a newborn

925
00:39:55,760 --> 00:39:56,520
Speaker 4: to take care of.

926
00:39:56,680 --> 00:39:59,400
Speaker 5: At the end of the day, the biggest priority is

927
00:39:59,440 --> 00:39:59,880
Speaker 5: your kids.

928
00:40:00,000 --> 00:40:03,880
Speaker 8: This time, I brought my pump to dump since I

929
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:06,880
Speaker 8: knew I would take drinks. I knew she had her

930
00:40:06,920 --> 00:40:10,600
Speaker 8: family and her master of ceremonies, so I could afford

931
00:40:10,800 --> 00:40:13,600
Speaker 8: to be late all of this, And when I get

932
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:17,160
Speaker 8: to the wedding there were at least ten children there.

933
00:40:17,640 --> 00:40:20,200
Speaker 3: What wow, that's kind of like a big slap in

934
00:40:20,239 --> 00:40:21,800
Speaker 3: your face, Denise.

935
00:40:22,160 --> 00:40:25,080
Speaker 8: Also, I had asked her to make sure the hall

936
00:40:25,200 --> 00:40:28,840
Speaker 8: had a room for me to pump, and she they didn't.

937
00:40:29,200 --> 00:40:31,960
Speaker 8: I had to run around and use a dark hallway

938
00:40:32,080 --> 00:40:34,319
Speaker 8: in the back of the building because I refused to

939
00:40:34,440 --> 00:40:37,080
Speaker 8: use the bathroom. I felt so hurt that they didn't

940
00:40:37,080 --> 00:40:40,920
Speaker 8: want to include their own godson, who they always referred

941
00:40:40,960 --> 00:40:44,360
Speaker 8: to as their practice baby, but allowed their blood nieces

942
00:40:44,640 --> 00:40:48,040
Speaker 8: nephews to attend. I thought we were very close and

943
00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:51,359
Speaker 8: felt hurt after everything we shared and what I've done

944
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:53,279
Speaker 8: for them, and with me breastfeeding.

945
00:40:53,320 --> 00:40:56,120
Speaker 4: I don't know. I wanted to leave right away, but

946
00:40:56,520 --> 00:40:57,040
Speaker 4: I didn't.

947
00:40:57,280 --> 00:40:59,880
Speaker 8: I still had to do some host slash wedding duties,

948
00:41:00,120 --> 00:41:02,600
Speaker 8: and I always felt that maybe Denise wasn't too happy.

949
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 8: I got pregnant during this time, so me having to

950
00:41:05,600 --> 00:41:08,759
Speaker 8: go through all of this and nursing had ruined her

951
00:41:08,800 --> 00:41:13,000
Speaker 8: big day. Denise also doesn't claim herself as my husband's relative,

952
00:41:13,320 --> 00:41:17,160
Speaker 8: but considers herself just my best friend. She probably felt

953
00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:19,480
Speaker 8: she had to invite some of my in laws because

954
00:41:19,520 --> 00:41:22,480
Speaker 8: of me. I understand she probably didn't want their children

955
00:41:22,520 --> 00:41:25,759
Speaker 8: to attend. My in laws were the only other relatives

956
00:41:25,880 --> 00:41:28,560
Speaker 8: she had there. The rest of the guests were her

957
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:31,759
Speaker 8: and her college friends, her parents' friends, and immediate and

958
00:41:31,800 --> 00:41:35,160
Speaker 8: first relations. Jack and my brother in law were practically

959
00:41:35,239 --> 00:41:39,120
Speaker 8: best friends. Then Jack became my husband's best friend because

960
00:41:39,200 --> 00:41:41,240
Speaker 8: Denise and I were also best friends.

961
00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:43,479
Speaker 5: All in the same group. But guess what, Denise's kicking

962
00:41:43,480 --> 00:41:44,160
Speaker 5: you out of that circle?

963
00:41:44,200 --> 00:41:47,400
Speaker 4: Seems like, Yeah, Denise is being a real d My

964
00:41:47,520 --> 00:41:50,000
Speaker 4: husband nor his brother in law, who introduced them, were

965
00:41:50,080 --> 00:41:52,399
Speaker 4: part of the wedding party. I didn't want to start

966
00:41:52,400 --> 00:41:53,680
Speaker 4: any drama and ruin her day.

967
00:41:54,160 --> 00:41:56,200
Speaker 8: I know she was mad at my brother in law,

968
00:41:56,280 --> 00:41:59,760
Speaker 8: who got a little intoxicated and got into an argument

969
00:41:59,800 --> 00:42:03,600
Speaker 8: with her, also equally intoxicated, cousin towards the end of

970
00:42:03,600 --> 00:42:06,760
Speaker 8: the wedding party. We left shortly after that and didn't

971
00:42:06,840 --> 00:42:10,040
Speaker 8: stay to help close or clean up. I think there

972
00:42:10,080 --> 00:42:14,279
Speaker 8: were only two problems this whole wedding. This outside fight

973
00:42:14,440 --> 00:42:17,720
Speaker 8: when people were leaving, and right before food was served.

974
00:42:17,880 --> 00:42:18,720
Speaker 4: It got messy.

975
00:42:19,360 --> 00:42:23,000
Speaker 8: Being a first time unofficial wedding planner, I didn't mark tables,

976
00:42:23,320 --> 00:42:25,680
Speaker 8: so I had to run to each table, give them

977
00:42:25,680 --> 00:42:27,920
Speaker 8: a number, and call them up to get their trays.

978
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:29,440
Speaker 4: It was buffet style.

979
00:42:29,920 --> 00:42:32,680
Speaker 8: I didn't know all the guests and apparently didn't give

980
00:42:32,680 --> 00:42:35,560
Speaker 8: her grandparents an earlier number, so they had to wait

981
00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:39,600
Speaker 8: until after my in laws were served first. I explained

982
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:42,080
Speaker 8: to Denise that I wasn't trying to serve our table first.

983
00:42:42,120 --> 00:42:45,000
Speaker 8: I was literally just going in the order of the tables.

984
00:42:45,280 --> 00:42:47,880
Speaker 8: A couple months later, to our surprise, they had a

985
00:42:47,920 --> 00:42:51,600
Speaker 8: private wedding ceremony with her brother as the officiant. Only

986
00:42:51,640 --> 00:42:54,840
Speaker 8: her parents, two siblings, his parents, and my husband and

987
00:42:54,880 --> 00:42:59,279
Speaker 8: I were invited. It was lovely and personal. Denise got

988
00:42:59,360 --> 00:43:03,239
Speaker 8: us makeup artists, professional photographer, private van bus and we

989
00:43:03,360 --> 00:43:05,880
Speaker 8: drove around the city and had a fancy dinner reservation.

990
00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:09,480
Speaker 8: Nice I was not asked to help plan this and

991
00:43:09,600 --> 00:43:10,879
Speaker 8: only had to show up.

992
00:43:11,239 --> 00:43:13,040
Speaker 5: Was you look at that? That makes things a lot

993
00:43:13,080 --> 00:43:13,960
Speaker 5: easier for you? Op?

994
00:43:14,040 --> 00:43:16,839
Speaker 8: Doesn't that make it a lot more fun? The overseas

995
00:43:16,880 --> 00:43:19,799
Speaker 8: wedding was apparently canceled, and some of his relatives were

996
00:43:19,800 --> 00:43:22,680
Speaker 8: supposed to come to this ceremony but ended up not

997
00:43:22,719 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 8: being able to after all. After the wedding, I had

998
00:43:26,200 --> 00:43:28,640
Speaker 8: a third child, even though we were on the fence

999
00:43:28,640 --> 00:43:31,920
Speaker 8: about that. I had made a pregnancy pact with Denise

1000
00:43:32,120 --> 00:43:35,920
Speaker 8: after I had my first child. A pregnancy pact with Denise.

1001
00:43:36,160 --> 00:43:38,360
Speaker 5: Hey, you know, friendship sets that circle. I don't know

1002
00:43:38,360 --> 00:43:40,240
Speaker 5: what the pack was. Maybe we'll find out what the pack.

1003
00:43:40,120 --> 00:43:42,719
Speaker 8: Was, didn't She kind of already like devalue your own

1004
00:43:42,840 --> 00:43:45,000
Speaker 8: children by saying they weren't allowed to be at the wedding.

1005
00:43:45,239 --> 00:43:46,040
Speaker 4: Something just clicked.

1006
00:43:46,160 --> 00:43:47,759
Speaker 8: I feel like Denise did that because she was like,

1007
00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:49,880
Speaker 8: I don't want you being distracted by your baby.

1008
00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:50,520
Speaker 4: You're the host.

1009
00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:51,799
Speaker 8: You have to do this, You have to do that

1010
00:43:52,000 --> 00:43:55,160
Speaker 8: so your kids are not allowed to be here, which

1011
00:43:55,200 --> 00:43:57,680
Speaker 8: is like a fully absurd thing to.

1012
00:43:57,640 --> 00:43:59,600
Speaker 4: Do to your friend. Now that they were married, they

1013
00:43:59,600 --> 00:44:00,480
Speaker 4: wanted children.

1014
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:03,160
Speaker 8: I hosted a whole baby shower for them of course,

1015
00:44:03,440 --> 00:44:07,920
Speaker 8: while pregnant and working, Denise and Jack still weren't working.

1016
00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:11,040
Speaker 8: What He's an only child from an upper middle class

1017
00:44:11,080 --> 00:44:14,200
Speaker 8: family who pays their rent and living expenses, and probably

1018
00:44:14,239 --> 00:44:16,720
Speaker 8: the wedding. I never asked where they got the money from.

1019
00:44:16,880 --> 00:44:20,080
Speaker 8: Her first and my third were born a week apart.

1020
00:44:20,600 --> 00:44:23,160
Speaker 8: We planned for them to grow up together, but Denise

1021
00:44:23,200 --> 00:44:26,080
Speaker 8: and Jack moved away shortly a month after the births

1022
00:44:26,320 --> 00:44:29,680
Speaker 8: to go live with his parents. We now live across state.

1023
00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:32,400
Speaker 8: We are still friends, but we see each other a

1024
00:44:32,400 --> 00:44:35,600
Speaker 8: couple times a year, versus every day slash week like

1025
00:44:35,640 --> 00:44:36,160
Speaker 8: we used to.

1026
00:44:36,680 --> 00:44:39,480
Speaker 4: Our Packed children are now five.

1027
00:44:39,640 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 8: And by the way, I want you to make a

1028
00:44:41,560 --> 00:44:44,279
Speaker 8: pact with us that you always join us when we

1029
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:49,680
Speaker 8: go live every weekday at three PMPST on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok,

1030
00:44:50,120 --> 00:44:50,880
Speaker 8: and Twitch.

1031
00:44:51,200 --> 00:44:53,239
Speaker 4: Just tap on our profile and then you're in.

1032
00:44:53,719 --> 00:44:56,200
Speaker 5: Hey, we might even be live right now.

1033
00:44:56,400 --> 00:44:59,279
Speaker 8: I think that's a blessing in disguise for OP that

1034
00:44:59,520 --> 00:45:03,080
Speaker 8: Denise Jack move. And I don't know if the Packed

1035
00:45:03,200 --> 00:45:04,760
Speaker 8: Children is like a good idea.

1036
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:06,799
Speaker 5: It's like a friendship thing, and I get that, Like.

1037
00:45:06,920 --> 00:45:10,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, but she didn't respect the pact clearly she moved.

1038
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:13,600
Speaker 5: Yeah, Denise was being very selfish here and I don't know,

1039
00:45:13,680 --> 00:45:16,839
Speaker 5: like she put Ope through so much stress and like

1040
00:45:17,120 --> 00:45:20,280
Speaker 5: not necessarily used OPI, but like used op.

1041
00:45:20,520 --> 00:45:21,800
Speaker 4: Where was Opie's husband?

1042
00:45:21,840 --> 00:45:24,360
Speaker 8: I don't know, we didn't get any Information's done something

1043
00:45:24,400 --> 00:45:26,880
Speaker 8: and been like hey, because Denise is supposed to be

1044
00:45:26,960 --> 00:45:28,560
Speaker 8: his like you know, quasi sister.

1045
00:45:28,680 --> 00:45:32,400
Speaker 5: Yeah, especially since Jack and Opie's husband are like so

1046
00:45:32,480 --> 00:45:35,319
Speaker 5: buddy buddy, Like why isn't the husband helping out as much?

1047
00:45:35,440 --> 00:45:36,920
Speaker 5: Or it seems like I mean maybe he is. I

1048
00:45:36,920 --> 00:45:38,640
Speaker 5: don't know. It just seems like the husband was not

1049
00:45:38,760 --> 00:45:39,560
Speaker 5: very relevant in this.

1050
00:45:40,120 --> 00:45:43,600
Speaker 8: I've never confronted my bff on the whole wedding thing.

1051
00:45:43,880 --> 00:45:45,640
Speaker 4: We remain on good terms.

1052
00:45:45,880 --> 00:45:49,200
Speaker 8: Actually, husband and I are the only friends Jack is

1053
00:45:49,239 --> 00:45:53,120
Speaker 8: allowed to keep in contact with now besides Denise's brothers.

1054
00:45:53,520 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 8: They don't even talk to my brother in law or

1055
00:45:56,080 --> 00:45:59,080
Speaker 8: any of my in laws. Would you have continued with

1056
00:45:59,120 --> 00:46:01,760
Speaker 8: the wedding planning? Would you have stayed at the wedding

1057
00:46:02,040 --> 00:46:05,560
Speaker 8: when you saw all those kids? Would you continue this friendship?

1058
00:46:05,920 --> 00:46:08,560
Speaker 8: Would you have had another child? I don't think having

1059
00:46:08,560 --> 00:46:10,719
Speaker 8: another child really has any bearing on this. I don't

1060
00:46:10,719 --> 00:46:12,440
Speaker 8: think I would have made a pact with them to

1061
00:46:12,520 --> 00:46:13,240
Speaker 8: have children.

1062
00:46:13,360 --> 00:46:14,600
Speaker 4: That's one thing I would.

1063
00:46:14,440 --> 00:46:17,120
Speaker 5: Have been more communicative of, like I have children, Like,

1064
00:46:17,160 --> 00:46:19,480
Speaker 5: why can't the kids come? I'm Mary confused. Like, I

1065
00:46:19,520 --> 00:46:21,680
Speaker 5: get it. It's your wedding, your rules. That's the rules.

1066
00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:24,240
Speaker 5: You're wedding, your choice. I get it. But like, now

1067
00:46:24,280 --> 00:46:26,080
Speaker 5: that you saw the kids there, what the heck?

1068
00:46:26,160 --> 00:46:29,080
Speaker 8: Yeah, that would be I would feel so weird to

1069
00:46:29,160 --> 00:46:32,640
Speaker 8: answer the question of would I have continued the friendship.

1070
00:46:32,760 --> 00:46:35,360
Speaker 8: I think that would have fundamentally changed things for me

1071
00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:37,320
Speaker 8: to where I don't think we could be like super

1072
00:46:37,360 --> 00:46:40,160
Speaker 8: besties anymore. Like, no, we might be able to stay, like,

1073
00:46:40,239 --> 00:46:42,080
Speaker 8: you know, casually, especially if.

1074
00:46:42,040 --> 00:46:44,120
Speaker 5: You're so far like what you're say in contact. But

1075
00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:44,920
Speaker 5: that's that story.

1076
00:46:44,920 --> 00:46:45,120
Speaker 1: Guys.

1077
00:46:45,400 --> 00:46:49,040
Speaker 8: My daughter is getting married and she wants her uncle

1078
00:46:49,120 --> 00:46:50,880
Speaker 8: to be the one to walk her down the aisle

1079
00:46:51,000 --> 00:46:52,240
Speaker 8: instead of her father.

1080
00:46:52,640 --> 00:46:55,359
Speaker 5: Oh well, good for the uncle, bad for the father.

1081
00:46:55,440 --> 00:46:58,160
Speaker 8: It's probably the fun uncle. I female forty six, got

1082
00:46:58,160 --> 00:47:01,200
Speaker 8: pregnant with my daughter, Sarah, female twenty six, when I

1083
00:47:01,239 --> 00:47:05,120
Speaker 8: was in college. My parents and my then boyfriend's parents

1084
00:47:05,160 --> 00:47:08,080
Speaker 8: pushed us to Mary, which we did. My late husband

1085
00:47:08,160 --> 00:47:12,000
Speaker 8: unfortunately passed away a week after our daughter's second birthday

1086
00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:14,839
Speaker 8: because of a heart complication that we did not even

1087
00:47:14,920 --> 00:47:17,279
Speaker 8: know he had. It was a very hard time for

1088
00:47:17,360 --> 00:47:18,520
Speaker 8: me and I went through a.

1089
00:47:18,520 --> 00:47:19,400
Speaker 1: Very bad depression.

1090
00:47:19,480 --> 00:47:19,680
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1091
00:47:19,680 --> 00:47:21,200
Speaker 4: Wow, that's incredibly tragic.

1092
00:47:21,239 --> 00:47:21,880
Speaker 1: I'm sorry about that.

1093
00:47:21,880 --> 00:47:24,399
Speaker 5: Opepe, that just like kind of took a turn right there. Yeah.

1094
00:47:24,440 --> 00:47:26,000
Speaker 4: Well, hopefully we'll turn out of it right yeah.

1095
00:47:26,040 --> 00:47:28,800
Speaker 8: By the way, this comes from user beije Donut nineteen

1096
00:47:29,000 --> 00:47:34,360
Speaker 8: on the r slash Okay storytime subrendit. So four years later,

1097
00:47:34,719 --> 00:47:37,560
Speaker 8: I met my now husband, Robert Male forty six, on

1098
00:47:37,600 --> 00:47:40,400
Speaker 8: a blind date set up by a friend. He was

1099
00:47:40,440 --> 00:47:42,959
Speaker 8: one of my best friend's cousins. We hit it off

1100
00:47:43,080 --> 00:47:46,560
Speaker 8: and got married a year later. Even when we were dating,

1101
00:47:46,640 --> 00:47:48,920
Speaker 8: he was very hands on with my daughter, and it

1102
00:47:49,000 --> 00:47:51,279
Speaker 8: did not take too long for my daughter to call

1103
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:55,040
Speaker 8: him papa. Even after we got married, and when I

1104
00:47:55,080 --> 00:47:57,760
Speaker 8: got pregnant two years into the marriage and gave birth

1105
00:47:57,800 --> 00:48:02,200
Speaker 8: to twins, male and female seventeen, he still acted like

1106
00:48:02,200 --> 00:48:05,040
Speaker 8: a father to Sarah. She was even included in my

1107
00:48:05,160 --> 00:48:08,960
Speaker 8: husband's family reunions and the cousin group photoshoot that my

1108
00:48:09,120 --> 00:48:12,440
Speaker 8: in laws organize every Christmas. Things took a bit of

1109
00:48:12,480 --> 00:48:16,200
Speaker 8: a turn when Sarah turned eighteen. She started calling him

1110
00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:19,440
Speaker 8: by his first name, and both Robert and I were

1111
00:48:19,520 --> 00:48:22,520
Speaker 8: taken aback with the change of attitude she was displaying.

1112
00:48:23,040 --> 00:48:26,759
Speaker 8: I asked Robert what that was about, but he only shrugged,

1113
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:29,680
Speaker 8: not knowing the reason. I thought things would go back

1114
00:48:29,719 --> 00:48:32,359
Speaker 8: to normal, but she has been consistent in calling him

1115
00:48:32,360 --> 00:48:35,000
Speaker 8: by his first name, so I asked her if we

1116
00:48:35,040 --> 00:48:38,720
Speaker 8: could talk. Robert asked if he could join, which Sarah agreed.

1117
00:48:39,200 --> 00:48:42,960
Speaker 8: To make things short, my daughter overheard my husband talking

1118
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:45,760
Speaker 8: about a father's day trip to his friend who owns

1119
00:48:45,800 --> 00:48:48,719
Speaker 8: a hostel. My friend asked him if he forgot to

1120
00:48:48,800 --> 00:48:51,960
Speaker 8: include Sarah since my husband only asked him to prepare

1121
00:48:52,040 --> 00:48:55,440
Speaker 8: three bedrooms. My husband replied that he planned this trip

1122
00:48:55,480 --> 00:48:59,480
Speaker 8: for his real children, only it wouldn't make sense if

1123
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:02,480
Speaker 8: Sarah was in the trip since he wasn't her real father.

1124
00:49:02,840 --> 00:49:06,240
Speaker 8: This made Sarah feel betrayed and hurt because she saw

1125
00:49:06,360 --> 00:49:09,879
Speaker 8: him as her real dad, even if she knew he

1126
00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:12,839
Speaker 8: was her stepdad. My husband tried to explain to her

1127
00:49:12,920 --> 00:49:16,000
Speaker 8: that though he loves her as a father, his love

1128
00:49:16,040 --> 00:49:19,719
Speaker 8: for the twins was different since they were his real children.

1129
00:49:20,080 --> 00:49:21,960
Speaker 4: I wanted to just shut him.

1130
00:49:21,920 --> 00:49:26,000
Speaker 8: Up because he was over using the word real, but

1131
00:49:26,080 --> 00:49:29,080
Speaker 8: Sarah told us to leave her room. What made that

1132
00:49:29,200 --> 00:49:31,640
Speaker 8: day even more depressing was that this day was her

1133
00:49:31,719 --> 00:49:35,640
Speaker 8: last week with us before she leaves the country for college.

1134
00:49:36,080 --> 00:49:39,880
Speaker 8: Since then, every time she comes home, Sarah acts like

1135
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:44,000
Speaker 8: nothing happened, but continues to call Robert by his first name.

1136
00:49:44,200 --> 00:49:46,759
Speaker 5: Look at that the dynamic has changed, Robert. You went

1137
00:49:46,800 --> 00:49:48,480
Speaker 5: from dad to Robert.

1138
00:49:48,600 --> 00:49:50,400
Speaker 4: Honestly, she could have done a whole lot worse.

1139
00:49:50,520 --> 00:49:52,960
Speaker 8: I think, Hey, if that's what you're gonna say, then

1140
00:49:53,000 --> 00:49:55,120
Speaker 8: that's what I'm gonna be. You are now Robert to me,

1141
00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:57,719
Speaker 8: Robert didn't want to add fuel to the fire and

1142
00:49:57,880 --> 00:49:58,880
Speaker 8: just tolerated it.

1143
00:49:59,040 --> 00:50:02,200
Speaker 4: And now a few years since then, my daughter announced

1144
00:50:02,200 --> 00:50:06,040
Speaker 4: her engagement to her longtime boyfriend. We were very happy

1145
00:50:06,080 --> 00:50:08,440
Speaker 4: for her, as they have been dating since they were

1146
00:50:08,480 --> 00:50:11,719
Speaker 4: still college freshmen. Two weeks before their wedding, we were

1147
00:50:11,760 --> 00:50:14,600
Speaker 4: wondering who would be walking Sarah down the aisle. I

1148
00:50:14,640 --> 00:50:16,960
Speaker 4: assumed it would be Robert, since I thought we have

1149
00:50:17,080 --> 00:50:21,880
Speaker 4: moved past that incident. But no, my daughter scoffed.

1150
00:50:21,440 --> 00:50:23,520
Speaker 8: At me when I told her about Robert walking her

1151
00:50:23,520 --> 00:50:26,520
Speaker 8: down the aisle. She said, quote, I thought it was

1152
00:50:26,640 --> 00:50:30,000
Speaker 8: obvious that Uncle Greg, my late husband's brother, would be

1153
00:50:30,040 --> 00:50:33,080
Speaker 8: the one to do that. Besides, I'm not his real daughter.

1154
00:50:33,160 --> 00:50:35,960
Speaker 8: It wouldn't make sense if he walked me down the aisle.

1155
00:50:36,040 --> 00:50:37,680
Speaker 8: That's something you hold on to for a long time.

1156
00:50:37,880 --> 00:50:39,279
Speaker 8: Let's make it perfectly clear.

1157
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:41,719
Speaker 5: Yes, he could have just apologized. You could have said

1158
00:50:41,760 --> 00:50:44,840
Speaker 5: it before she left. Maybe when she got back you

1159
00:50:44,920 --> 00:50:45,800
Speaker 5: knew there was tension.

1160
00:50:46,080 --> 00:50:48,080
Speaker 8: He could have easily said, I think you're just as

1161
00:50:48,120 --> 00:50:50,040
Speaker 8: real of a daughter as my other daughter's. All it

1162
00:50:50,040 --> 00:50:51,960
Speaker 8: took was one sentence, and he couldn't do it. If

1163
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:53,880
Speaker 8: you can't do that, it must be because that's what

1164
00:50:53,920 --> 00:50:56,680
Speaker 8: you really feel. So he must have really felt like

1165
00:50:57,160 --> 00:51:00,680
Speaker 8: Sarah was less than his biologue children.

1166
00:51:00,719 --> 00:51:02,160
Speaker 4: So that's what he meant. He said what he meant,

1167
00:51:02,160 --> 00:51:03,279
Speaker 4: And now you got to stand by it.

1168
00:51:03,280 --> 00:51:06,520
Speaker 5: Robert, and you reap what you sell pretty much, and yeah,

1169
00:51:06,560 --> 00:51:07,040
Speaker 5: there you go.

1170
00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:08,960
Speaker 4: Anyway, I didn't talk back.

1171
00:51:09,200 --> 00:51:12,279
Speaker 8: Instead, I apologized for my ignorance and told her that

1172
00:51:12,320 --> 00:51:15,120
Speaker 8: I'll speak with Robert about it, since he also assumed

1173
00:51:15,120 --> 00:51:17,080
Speaker 8: he'd be the one to walk her down the aisle.

1174
00:51:17,520 --> 00:51:19,880
Speaker 8: When I told him what Sarah said, he was pissed,

1175
00:51:20,120 --> 00:51:23,439
Speaker 8: but I politely reminded him of the incident years ago,

1176
00:51:23,719 --> 00:51:26,600
Speaker 8: which made him get even more upset, He said that

1177
00:51:26,600 --> 00:51:28,440
Speaker 8: that was a long time ago and that.

1178
00:51:28,320 --> 00:51:29,600
Speaker 4: Sarah should move on.

1179
00:51:29,680 --> 00:51:32,239
Speaker 8: Shut up, Robert, Yeah, Robert, you don't have the right

1180
00:51:32,320 --> 00:51:35,240
Speaker 8: to decide that. And hey, look, the path of virtue

1181
00:51:35,320 --> 00:51:38,480
Speaker 8: is the path of forgiveness, and really, to better all

1182
00:51:38,520 --> 00:51:40,279
Speaker 8: of us, we need to be able to let go

1183
00:51:40,360 --> 00:51:42,520
Speaker 8: of things and move on from them. However, that's not

1184
00:51:42,640 --> 00:51:45,719
Speaker 8: something that you can expect someone to just forget when

1185
00:51:45,719 --> 00:51:48,120
Speaker 8: it comes to planning their may or their.

1186
00:51:47,960 --> 00:51:50,200
Speaker 5: Wedding, especially if you do not apologize for it.

1187
00:51:50,480 --> 00:51:52,759
Speaker 8: Yeah, well you doubled down, so she's like, you're not

1188
00:51:52,840 --> 00:51:54,280
Speaker 8: my dad. You said so yourself.

1189
00:51:54,280 --> 00:51:56,480
Speaker 4: So anyway, but again, what do I always say? My wedding,

1190
00:51:56,520 --> 00:51:58,440
Speaker 4: my rules, My wedding, my rules. If you're not happy

1191
00:51:58,440 --> 00:52:01,600
Speaker 4: with it, don't go. I, who was offended for my daughter,

1192
00:52:01,880 --> 00:52:04,120
Speaker 4: told him that he shouldn't even be upset since he

1193
00:52:04,280 --> 00:52:07,759
Speaker 4: doesn't see her as his real child anyway. He then

1194
00:52:07,800 --> 00:52:08,839
Speaker 4: got teary.

1195
00:52:08,520 --> 00:52:11,239
Speaker 8: Eyed and told me not to speak to him. He

1196
00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:14,719
Speaker 8: still attended Sarah's wedding, but looked visibly down. We still

1197
00:52:14,760 --> 00:52:17,520
Speaker 8: aren't on good terms and have been pretending in front

1198
00:52:17,520 --> 00:52:20,319
Speaker 8: of relatives. My daughter does not know about this, and

1199
00:52:20,360 --> 00:52:22,799
Speaker 8: I want to keep it that way. Nevertheless, it's been

1200
00:52:22,840 --> 00:52:25,800
Speaker 8: a week since my daughter's wedding and Robert is still upset.

1201
00:52:26,040 --> 00:52:28,920
Speaker 8: He only talks to me about the twins and household stuff,

1202
00:52:28,920 --> 00:52:32,640
Speaker 8: but beyond that he keeps everything to himself. I feel

1203
00:52:32,680 --> 00:52:35,640
Speaker 8: really bad and think he's acting this way because of me.

1204
00:52:36,400 --> 00:52:39,319
Speaker 8: So without being said, am I the A hole?

1205
00:52:39,560 --> 00:52:39,640
Speaker 9: No?

1206
00:52:39,920 --> 00:52:40,200
Speaker 4: You're not.

1207
00:52:40,440 --> 00:52:43,080
Speaker 8: In fact, you even said you politely reminded him like

1208
00:52:43,440 --> 00:52:45,759
Speaker 8: you did this. Remember when you said you's you your

1209
00:52:45,800 --> 00:52:46,520
Speaker 8: real daughter.

1210
00:52:46,640 --> 00:52:48,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, you're not the a hole and you respected your

1211
00:52:48,600 --> 00:52:51,800
Speaker 5: daughter's wishes and you see where your daughter was coming from. Again,

1212
00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:55,120
Speaker 5: I fully support it. It sucks if Robert tried to,

1213
00:52:55,360 --> 00:52:57,279
Speaker 5: you know, lend out a hand and like are all

1214
00:52:57,320 --> 00:53:01,040
Speaker 5: of branch and try to forgive. I mean, still not deserved,

1215
00:53:01,040 --> 00:53:02,840
Speaker 5: but at least it's out there. He still is on

1216
00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:05,240
Speaker 5: his high horse, and he's still like is uh.

1217
00:53:05,320 --> 00:53:09,680
Speaker 8: Robert is currently pulling a classic I feel like emotionally

1218
00:53:09,760 --> 00:53:11,279
Speaker 8: immature male move right.

1219
00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:14,120
Speaker 4: If I don't care, why does she care? And it's

1220
00:53:14,200 --> 00:53:17,239
Speaker 4: like you can't see past your own nose, dude.

1221
00:53:17,040 --> 00:53:19,759
Speaker 5: It's Robert's pride. Robert's pride is getting in the wave

1222
00:53:19,800 --> 00:53:22,359
Speaker 5: of him, and you know what, that's your pride, but

1223
00:53:22,440 --> 00:53:23,399
Speaker 5: look where it's got you.

1224
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 8: You might have still had the opportunity to fix it

1225
00:53:25,640 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 8: right then when she said, obviously I am not your

1226
00:53:28,200 --> 00:53:30,239
Speaker 8: real daughter, so why would you want me down the aisle.

1227
00:53:30,280 --> 00:53:32,359
Speaker 8: You know what, though, I'm glad you didn't do that

1228
00:53:32,400 --> 00:53:34,680
Speaker 8: because you know what, that would have been a lie,

1229
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:37,160
Speaker 8: because that is how you felt. You said how you

1230
00:53:37,200 --> 00:53:41,040
Speaker 8: really felt. Anyway, let's continue. By guys, I'm Sarah. This

1231
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:43,560
Speaker 8: is not my Reddit account, it's my cousin's on my

1232
00:53:43,600 --> 00:53:46,840
Speaker 8: bio father's side. I apologize for any grammar mistakes and

1233
00:53:46,840 --> 00:53:50,279
Speaker 8: spelling errors. My cousin sent me this post while my

1234
00:53:50,360 --> 00:53:52,239
Speaker 8: husband and I were packing some stuff up for our

1235
00:53:52,239 --> 00:53:55,040
Speaker 8: honeymoon earlier, and she thought it was my mom. My

1236
00:53:55,120 --> 00:53:57,360
Speaker 8: cousin is one of my go to people, so she

1237
00:53:57,480 --> 00:54:00,719
Speaker 8: really knows every single drama in my life. We are

1238
00:54:00,800 --> 00:54:03,799
Speaker 8: really tight, and I was skeptical at first, since I

1239
00:54:03,800 --> 00:54:06,040
Speaker 8: would never have thought of my mom using Reddit.

1240
00:54:06,280 --> 00:54:10,359
Speaker 4: It's just too random until I read the overheard part

1241
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:14,040
Speaker 4: of the post and it just brought back very good memories.

1242
00:54:14,200 --> 00:54:16,360
Speaker 8: On top of that, I noticed that the fake names

1243
00:54:16,440 --> 00:54:19,200
Speaker 8: used are based on the first letter of our real names.

1244
00:54:19,440 --> 00:54:21,640
Speaker 8: Gave me confirmation that this is my mom, and I

1245
00:54:21,680 --> 00:54:23,440
Speaker 8: just want to say that I don't appreciate that some

1246
00:54:23,520 --> 00:54:25,520
Speaker 8: of you are calling my mom an a hole, But

1247
00:54:25,560 --> 00:54:28,239
Speaker 8: I also don't think it's your fault since mom left

1248
00:54:28,239 --> 00:54:30,359
Speaker 8: out a lot of details. Yeah, that's weird. I didn't

1249
00:54:30,400 --> 00:54:31,680
Speaker 8: think the mom was an a hole at all in

1250
00:54:31,719 --> 00:54:32,240
Speaker 8: that situation.

1251
00:54:32,400 --> 00:54:35,000
Speaker 5: No, she did the right thing. People have their opinions.

1252
00:54:35,160 --> 00:54:37,520
Speaker 8: After I left for college in the States, a lot

1253
00:54:37,600 --> 00:54:40,200
Speaker 8: of things happen. My cousin, the owner of the account,

1254
00:54:40,640 --> 00:54:43,840
Speaker 8: was the one filling me in with details their updates.

1255
00:54:44,000 --> 00:54:46,480
Speaker 8: My mom and Robert had a huge fight regarding me,

1256
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:51,560
Speaker 8: plus Robert always came home late and intoxicated from the cockpit.

1257
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:55,200
Speaker 8: The twins, well, they were shielded from the drama because

1258
00:54:55,200 --> 00:54:58,080
Speaker 8: they were children. They kind of separated for like a year.

1259
00:54:58,520 --> 00:55:00,440
Speaker 4: My mom went to live with her parents.

1260
00:55:00,960 --> 00:55:03,640
Speaker 8: I was always in contact with Mom, and she always

1261
00:55:03,760 --> 00:55:05,719
Speaker 8: asked for my whereabouts.

1262
00:55:05,480 --> 00:55:06,760
Speaker 4: You know, normal mom stuff.

1263
00:55:06,960 --> 00:55:09,160
Speaker 8: She also kind of filled me in about her separation

1264
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:12,160
Speaker 8: from Robert. I actually felt guilty because I knew it

1265
00:55:12,239 --> 00:55:15,319
Speaker 8: was partially because of me. Their biggest fight was when

1266
00:55:15,400 --> 00:55:18,360
Speaker 8: Uncle Greg I will be using the fake names, confronted

1267
00:55:18,440 --> 00:55:21,360
Speaker 8: Robert about the incident because when I arrived at my

1268
00:55:21,480 --> 00:55:25,240
Speaker 8: university dorm, I called him sobbing and told him about everything.

1269
00:55:25,719 --> 00:55:27,920
Speaker 4: Uncle Greg is the typical.

1270
00:55:27,680 --> 00:55:31,640
Speaker 9: Cool single Uncle called it the fun uncle and has

1271
00:55:31,760 --> 00:55:35,319
Speaker 9: always been protective of us cousins, so when he learned

1272
00:55:35,360 --> 00:55:37,799
Speaker 9: about it, he went on full Papa Bear mode for me.

1273
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:40,479
Speaker 8: Robert was kind of mad that he was getting into

1274
00:55:40,520 --> 00:55:44,360
Speaker 8: our business. But Mom told Robert that Uncle Greg actually

1275
00:55:44,360 --> 00:55:46,840
Speaker 8: my cousins, and I call him Dad Dad because he

1276
00:55:46,920 --> 00:55:49,800
Speaker 8: really is like our second parent. Also has a say

1277
00:55:49,920 --> 00:55:52,640
Speaker 8: since this is his family. But Robert wasn't happy about that.

1278
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:56,640
Speaker 8: So yeah, that instigated a big argument that almost led

1279
00:55:56,640 --> 00:55:59,520
Speaker 8: to Robert and Uncle Greg having a fistfight. They were

1280
00:55:59,560 --> 00:56:02,360
Speaker 8: already throwing unkind words to each other and everyone was

1281
00:56:02,480 --> 00:56:05,560
Speaker 8: just emotional. When I learned what happened, like I mentioned,

1282
00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:08,280
Speaker 8: I felt guilty and bad, so I sent Robert an email.

1283
00:56:08,320 --> 00:56:10,680
Speaker 8: Since he didn't use messenger. In the email, I told

1284
00:56:10,760 --> 00:56:13,080
Speaker 8: him that he should apologize to Mom and make things

1285
00:56:13,160 --> 00:56:14,120
Speaker 8: right for the twins.

1286
00:56:14,360 --> 00:56:15,960
Speaker 4: I did not receive any.

1287
00:56:15,800 --> 00:56:19,000
Speaker 8: Response from him, but eventually he and Mom made up

1288
00:56:19,040 --> 00:56:21,879
Speaker 8: after a year. I was quite happy because I really

1289
00:56:21,880 --> 00:56:24,400
Speaker 8: didn't want to ruin my mom's marriage. I love my

1290
00:56:24,520 --> 00:56:26,839
Speaker 8: mom so much and I would do anything for her.

1291
00:56:27,239 --> 00:56:31,120
Speaker 8: You might be wondering why my mom did not initiate divorce. Well,

1292
00:56:31,200 --> 00:56:34,320
Speaker 8: first of all, divorce is still illegal in my country.

1293
00:56:34,640 --> 00:56:38,879
Speaker 8: Annment is extremely expensive, and even if we were kind

1294
00:56:38,960 --> 00:56:41,520
Speaker 8: of well off, my mom's a physical therapist and a

1295
00:56:41,560 --> 00:56:43,800
Speaker 8: teacher at university, while Robert used to be a public

1296
00:56:43,800 --> 00:56:46,840
Speaker 8: accountant up until I was sixteen and owns a commercial space,

1297
00:56:47,080 --> 00:56:50,200
Speaker 8: their pockets would have hurt, and annulment takes a lot

1298
00:56:50,239 --> 00:56:52,799
Speaker 8: of time to process. Today, I reached out to them

1299
00:56:52,880 --> 00:56:55,480
Speaker 8: and I told them that I wanted a proper conversation

1300
00:56:55,560 --> 00:56:56,120
Speaker 8: because this.

1301
00:56:56,040 --> 00:56:58,040
Speaker 4: Has been long overdue.

1302
00:56:58,120 --> 00:57:00,719
Speaker 8: I think that we all need some closure, very emotionally

1303
00:57:00,800 --> 00:57:02,120
Speaker 8: mature on Ope's part.

1304
00:57:02,080 --> 00:57:04,359
Speaker 5: Yeah, more than Robert should be the one doing this,

1305
00:57:04,600 --> 00:57:06,680
Speaker 5: not Opie or Sarah.

1306
00:57:06,719 --> 00:57:08,719
Speaker 8: I do want to note that I have moved on,

1307
00:57:09,200 --> 00:57:13,200
Speaker 8: but forgive I don't think so. It pisses me off

1308
00:57:13,200 --> 00:57:16,400
Speaker 8: that Robert thinks I can just move on, forgive and forget.

1309
00:57:16,760 --> 00:57:18,600
Speaker 8: It's hard to think that this was the man I

1310
00:57:18,760 --> 00:57:21,880
Speaker 8: used to call papa. What's even more sad is that

1311
00:57:22,000 --> 00:57:24,520
Speaker 8: I still see him as my papa. The pain I

1312
00:57:24,560 --> 00:57:27,080
Speaker 8: felt that day and when I started calling him by

1313
00:57:27,080 --> 00:57:30,520
Speaker 8: his first name. I even wanted to major in accountancy

1314
00:57:30,600 --> 00:57:31,240
Speaker 8: because of him.

1315
00:57:31,480 --> 00:57:32,680
Speaker 4: He was my role model.

1316
00:57:32,880 --> 00:57:35,040
Speaker 8: There was a lot of moments where I just wanted

1317
00:57:35,080 --> 00:57:37,320
Speaker 8: to go back to that day and pretend I did

1318
00:57:37,360 --> 00:57:40,800
Speaker 8: not hear anything and let it slide. Then maybe I'd

1319
00:57:40,840 --> 00:57:43,520
Speaker 8: still call him Papa. But I would be an idiot

1320
00:57:43,520 --> 00:57:46,160
Speaker 8: for thinking that, because no matter what, the damage has

1321
00:57:46,240 --> 00:57:50,160
Speaker 8: already been done. So yeah, I'm contemplating if I would

1322
00:57:50,240 --> 00:57:53,240
Speaker 8: update you guys on our talk tomorrow. I've texted my

1323
00:57:53,280 --> 00:57:55,200
Speaker 8: mom not to look over the comments here because some

1324
00:57:55,280 --> 00:57:58,640
Speaker 8: of you are just brutal. Sorry, I just don't want

1325
00:57:58,640 --> 00:58:01,040
Speaker 8: my mom to feel bad. Yes, I want to add

1326
00:58:01,080 --> 00:58:03,520
Speaker 8: that both my mom and Robert paid for my college tuition.

1327
00:58:03,880 --> 00:58:06,280
Speaker 8: I did not get any loans or anything. Student loans

1328
00:58:06,280 --> 00:58:09,760
Speaker 8: are uncommon in our country. Parents are always the ones paying.

1329
00:58:10,160 --> 00:58:13,439
Speaker 8: I'm actually grateful that Robert helped pay, but that still

1330
00:58:13,480 --> 00:58:14,600
Speaker 8: doesn't remove the pain.

1331
00:58:15,040 --> 00:58:17,520
Speaker 4: My husband has been really patient and supportive. And here's

1332
00:58:17,560 --> 00:58:19,920
Speaker 4: a little trivia. We were classmates in high school.

1333
00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:22,480
Speaker 8: I was the talkative girl, the social butterfly, and he

1334
00:58:22,520 --> 00:58:24,680
Speaker 8: was one of the goofballs. And we actually fought a

1335
00:58:24,720 --> 00:58:27,320
Speaker 8: lot back then, and we eventually developed feelings for each

1336
00:58:27,360 --> 00:58:30,320
Speaker 8: other throughout freshman year. We were surprised that we went

1337
00:58:30,360 --> 00:58:32,720
Speaker 8: to the same university. We were both catching up on

1338
00:58:32,760 --> 00:58:35,640
Speaker 8: each other's lives, and the rest is history. And the

1339
00:58:35,720 --> 00:58:39,240
Speaker 8: mother's response, we have receivers, Okay, And just to speak

1340
00:58:39,280 --> 00:58:42,120
Speaker 8: really quickly on you know, just a little bit of

1341
00:58:42,200 --> 00:58:44,640
Speaker 8: the perspective of like being able to move on but

1342
00:58:44,720 --> 00:58:47,919
Speaker 8: not necessarily forgive or you know, I think the real

1343
00:58:48,040 --> 00:58:49,800
Speaker 8: thing there is you want to get to a place

1344
00:58:49,840 --> 00:58:51,800
Speaker 8: where you can forgive and not forget.

1345
00:58:51,800 --> 00:58:53,840
Speaker 4: But it's like that would be a really hard thing.

1346
00:58:54,280 --> 00:58:58,640
Speaker 8: I mean in my own family dynamics and relationships, like

1347
00:58:58,680 --> 00:59:02,240
Speaker 8: I have stuff that I've probably I've forgiven, but like

1348
00:59:02,320 --> 00:59:03,840
Speaker 8: it's not something you forget, right.

1349
00:59:03,680 --> 00:59:05,240
Speaker 5: So the phrase of like you drop a mug and

1350
00:59:05,280 --> 00:59:07,440
Speaker 5: you put it back together, you can put it back together,

1351
00:59:07,440 --> 00:59:08,360
Speaker 5: but they're still gonna be crash.

1352
00:59:08,440 --> 00:59:08,640
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1353
00:59:08,640 --> 00:59:11,120
Speaker 8: It's just what's so obnoxious about this is that he

1354
00:59:11,240 --> 00:59:14,840
Speaker 8: had every opportunity to, oh, every single salvage that scenario.

1355
00:59:14,960 --> 00:59:17,120
Speaker 5: He had time after time after time to be like

1356
00:59:17,360 --> 00:59:19,280
Speaker 5: you are my daughter, or like let's talk about this.

1357
00:59:19,480 --> 00:59:22,560
Speaker 4: You just made it to get so much worse. Hello, everyone,

1358
00:59:22,720 --> 00:59:25,280
Speaker 4: I'd like to thank everyone for your advice and comments.

1359
00:59:25,400 --> 00:59:27,880
Speaker 4: My daughter found and commented on my post and we'll

1360
00:59:27,880 --> 00:59:29,840
Speaker 4: be talking about this tomorrow. She had just.

1361
00:59:29,840 --> 00:59:32,720
Speaker 8: Messaged me earlier. I was feeling tired today and couldn't sleep,

1362
00:59:32,960 --> 00:59:35,080
Speaker 8: so I was able to write this. I also want

1363
00:59:35,080 --> 00:59:37,360
Speaker 8: to thank the people for calling me out. I know

1364
00:59:37,440 --> 00:59:40,240
Speaker 8: I'm not the best mother, but I try. But yes,

1365
00:59:40,520 --> 00:59:43,480
Speaker 8: I am an a hole for tolerating him. I don't

1366
00:59:43,560 --> 00:59:45,720
Speaker 8: know what's going to happen in our talk tomorrow, but

1367
00:59:45,800 --> 00:59:48,200
Speaker 8: I do want everyone to have closure. I also want

1368
00:59:48,200 --> 00:59:50,680
Speaker 8: to add that my daughter and I do not have

1369
00:59:50,880 --> 00:59:53,640
Speaker 8: a strained relationship. She didn't want me to walk down

1370
00:59:53,680 --> 00:59:56,040
Speaker 8: the aisle because then Robert would be pushing her to

1371
00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:59,200
Speaker 8: let him walk her to since he thought we're a package.

1372
00:59:59,240 --> 01:00:02,360
Speaker 8: So yeah, anyone wondering where my daughter's comment is, you

1373
01:00:02,400 --> 01:00:05,760
Speaker 8: can search for her username strange Birthdays seven ninety. I

1374
01:00:05,800 --> 01:00:08,000
Speaker 8: will try to update, but it would be difficult since

1375
01:00:08,000 --> 01:00:11,240
Speaker 8: I know it's going to be emotional and Sarah the

1376
01:00:11,360 --> 01:00:15,040
Speaker 8: daughter responds three weeks later, Hey guys, here's the update

1377
01:00:15,080 --> 01:00:17,840
Speaker 8: on our situation. It's been almost a month, but a

1378
01:00:17,840 --> 01:00:21,400
Speaker 8: lot has happened. We just got back from our honeymoon. Nonetheless,

1379
01:00:21,600 --> 01:00:24,880
Speaker 8: a lot of things happened. Robert was still doubling down

1380
01:00:25,200 --> 01:00:28,160
Speaker 8: and justifying his actions. We were running in circles and

1381
01:00:28,200 --> 01:00:31,960
Speaker 8: could not find any middle ground. This angered my mom

1382
01:00:32,320 --> 01:00:34,720
Speaker 8: and then they had a heated argument that escalated to

1383
01:00:34,960 --> 01:00:38,600
Speaker 8: violence because Robert pushed my mom and said that he

1384
01:00:38,680 --> 01:00:41,000
Speaker 8: should not have married a woman with baggage.

1385
01:00:41,520 --> 01:00:44,760
Speaker 4: Oh what the hell?

1386
01:00:44,920 --> 01:00:49,480
Speaker 5: Man, this man, Robert, you see your scum scum.

1387
01:00:49,800 --> 01:00:53,840
Speaker 8: Sarah also agrees because after hearing him say that, that

1388
01:00:54,160 --> 01:00:57,840
Speaker 8: boiled my blood and I immediately slapped him.

1389
01:00:58,040 --> 01:01:00,200
Speaker 4: I pointed my fingers at him and warned him not

1390
01:01:00,240 --> 01:01:02,480
Speaker 4: to hurt my mom. He's about to push me too,

1391
01:01:03,000 --> 01:01:06,080
Speaker 4: but good thing was my husband was able to block

1392
01:01:06,160 --> 01:01:06,600
Speaker 4: him for me.

1393
01:01:06,720 --> 01:01:09,440
Speaker 5: I don't condone violence. Violence is always not the answer.

1394
01:01:09,720 --> 01:01:13,480
Speaker 5: But God, in the moment, Robert, that was well deserved

1395
01:01:13,480 --> 01:01:14,040
Speaker 5: to be slapped.

1396
01:01:14,080 --> 01:01:15,520
Speaker 4: At least you're pushing my mom.

1397
01:01:15,640 --> 01:01:17,960
Speaker 8: Think things are gonna get physical. That's like a human rule.

1398
01:01:18,000 --> 01:01:19,960
Speaker 8: I feel like if you're pushing my mom.

1399
01:01:20,000 --> 01:01:20,720
Speaker 4: It's going down.

1400
01:01:20,840 --> 01:01:26,440
Speaker 5: Any woman being pushed like that aggressively uncalled for, things

1401
01:01:26,440 --> 01:01:27,200
Speaker 5: are gonna get physical.

1402
01:01:27,320 --> 01:01:30,560
Speaker 8: Yeah, you would like to hope that people step in, right,

1403
01:01:30,880 --> 01:01:33,400
Speaker 8: So I just again don't condone violence.

1404
01:01:33,520 --> 01:01:35,840
Speaker 4: But sometimes you mess around, you find out, dude.

1405
01:01:35,840 --> 01:01:39,919
Speaker 8: Things got a little physical. My husband and Robert were

1406
01:01:40,000 --> 01:01:43,040
Speaker 8: punching each other. My twin brother was trying to stop them.

1407
01:01:43,200 --> 01:01:46,200
Speaker 8: Uncle Greg was also present and tried to pull them apart. I,

1408
01:01:46,480 --> 01:01:48,440
Speaker 8: while in a state of panic, called the police as

1409
01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:50,360
Speaker 8: my twin sister tried to comfort my mom.

1410
01:01:50,800 --> 01:01:53,680
Speaker 4: Fortunately, the neighbors heard all the commotion and helped pull

1411
01:01:53,720 --> 01:01:56,600
Speaker 4: my husband from Robert. At the police station, Robert and

1412
01:01:56,680 --> 01:01:59,960
Speaker 4: my husband were still verbally degrading each other. The police

1413
01:02:00,400 --> 01:02:03,040
Speaker 4: asked a lot of questions, but to shorten what happened,

1414
01:02:03,160 --> 01:02:06,120
Speaker 4: Robert admitted to pushing my mom harshly. My mom did

1415
01:02:06,120 --> 01:02:08,360
Speaker 4: not want to file a restraining order on him, since

1416
01:02:08,400 --> 01:02:11,640
Speaker 4: it was the first time Robert had physically tried to

1417
01:02:11,640 --> 01:02:14,680
Speaker 4: harm her. We encouraged her to file, which, but she.

1418
01:02:14,640 --> 01:02:17,760
Speaker 8: Said that they would start processing an annulment instead and separate.

1419
01:02:18,360 --> 01:02:21,720
Speaker 8: Robert admitted that he was still gambling and their savings

1420
01:02:21,760 --> 01:02:24,200
Speaker 8: from another bank account, which was supposed to be my

1421
01:02:24,280 --> 01:02:27,560
Speaker 8: sibling's college fund. They wanted to follow on my footsteps

1422
01:02:27,560 --> 01:02:32,479
Speaker 8: and study abroad has been nearly emptied because of gambling debt.

1423
01:02:32,680 --> 01:02:34,400
Speaker 4: Just when you thought he couldn't get any worse.

1424
01:02:34,520 --> 01:02:36,600
Speaker 5: You know when he was doubling down, he was doubling

1425
01:02:36,640 --> 01:02:37,480
Speaker 5: down somewhere else too.

1426
01:02:37,560 --> 01:02:40,480
Speaker 4: You got a nineteen on the blackjack table, hit me,

1427
01:02:40,800 --> 01:02:43,840
Speaker 4: I know the two is there? Come on, dude, Ugh Robert,

1428
01:02:43,920 --> 01:02:44,680
Speaker 4: what are you doing?

1429
01:02:44,760 --> 01:02:44,960
Speaker 1: Man?

1430
01:02:45,120 --> 01:02:47,160
Speaker 8: And he loved his own daughter so much that he

1431
01:02:47,720 --> 01:02:51,080
Speaker 8: spent all of their college savings on gambling. My mom

1432
01:02:51,160 --> 01:02:55,160
Speaker 8: went ballistic and started cursing him because most of the

1433
01:02:55,200 --> 01:02:59,640
Speaker 8: money was from her. Furthermore, the twins don't want anything

1434
01:02:59,640 --> 01:03:01,720
Speaker 8: to do with their dad. He will be paying child

1435
01:03:01,760 --> 01:03:04,560
Speaker 8: support until they go to college, though he has to

1436
01:03:04,600 --> 01:03:07,920
Speaker 8: find a job because he is broke. He's been secretly

1437
01:03:08,000 --> 01:03:10,680
Speaker 8: leeching off my mom's hard earned money for almost two

1438
01:03:10,760 --> 01:03:13,800
Speaker 8: years now. My mom filed in an moment. Two days later.

1439
01:03:14,120 --> 01:03:16,400
Speaker 8: We had to cancel our flight during that day because

1440
01:03:16,440 --> 01:03:18,640
Speaker 8: it was too much for me. We fortunately booked a

1441
01:03:18,640 --> 01:03:20,640
Speaker 8: ticket with the help of my husband's friend the day

1442
01:03:20,680 --> 01:03:23,840
Speaker 8: my mom filed and flew to our destination a week later.

1443
01:03:24,200 --> 01:03:27,959
Speaker 8: But I want you to fly to our destination, which

1444
01:03:28,000 --> 01:03:32,480
Speaker 8: is here on this stream every weekday at three pmpst.

1445
01:03:32,720 --> 01:03:37,240
Speaker 8: On Facebook, on YouTube, on Twitch, on TikTok heck, do

1446
01:03:37,360 --> 01:03:39,080
Speaker 8: all four of them all? You gotta do is tap

1447
01:03:39,120 --> 01:03:41,840
Speaker 8: our profile and you're in. Robert has graduated from the

1448
01:03:41,920 --> 01:03:44,040
Speaker 8: ort cloud. I want him to turn into spaghetti and

1449
01:03:44,080 --> 01:03:47,200
Speaker 8: no longer exist in our universe, which is what happens

1450
01:03:47,200 --> 01:03:48,320
Speaker 8: when you hit the black hole.

1451
01:03:48,600 --> 01:03:50,880
Speaker 4: You get spaghettied. This guy's awful.

1452
01:03:51,080 --> 01:03:54,560
Speaker 8: The audacity you have to have to think you could

1453
01:03:54,560 --> 01:03:56,600
Speaker 8: get away with pushing my mom in front of me.

1454
01:03:56,640 --> 01:03:58,160
Speaker 4: If you push my mom in front of.

1455
01:03:58,160 --> 01:04:01,480
Speaker 8: Me, I'm tackling you through the same whatever object is

1456
01:04:01,520 --> 01:04:05,480
Speaker 8: in front you're going through it. Sorry, I don't condone

1457
01:04:05,600 --> 01:04:08,400
Speaker 8: doing that, but like, don't push my mom.

1458
01:04:08,880 --> 01:04:10,960
Speaker 5: How stupid do you have to be to do that,

1459
01:04:11,080 --> 01:04:13,640
Speaker 5: to do any of the Everything that Robert did is

1460
01:04:13,720 --> 01:04:14,960
Speaker 5: all big dumb, dumb moves.

1461
01:04:15,040 --> 01:04:19,160
Speaker 8: Pushed your wife, alienated your really your first daughter who

1462
01:04:19,280 --> 01:04:22,600
Speaker 8: loved you, and then spent all both of your biological

1463
01:04:22,680 --> 01:04:23,880
Speaker 8: children's college funds on.

1464
01:04:24,080 --> 01:04:24,800
Speaker 5: Your wife's money.

1465
01:04:24,880 --> 01:04:26,560
Speaker 4: By the way, yeah, that wasn't even your money, that

1466
01:04:26,640 --> 01:04:27,080
Speaker 4: was your wife's.

1467
01:04:27,080 --> 01:04:30,480
Speaker 8: You spent your wife's hard earned savings that was supposed

1468
01:04:30,480 --> 01:04:33,360
Speaker 8: to be for a college fund on gambling that obviously

1469
01:04:33,400 --> 01:04:35,800
Speaker 8: you're not even good at because you lost.

1470
01:04:35,560 --> 01:04:39,000
Speaker 5: All the money, so you lost everything. Congratulations, Robert, you

1471
01:04:39,040 --> 01:04:41,240
Speaker 5: deserve nothing. Just like the black hole, You're gonna.

1472
01:04:41,080 --> 01:04:45,160
Speaker 4: Get exactly what you deserve, which is now nothing. Good

1473
01:04:45,160 --> 01:04:49,560
Speaker 4: on the kids that like Dad's OPI, Dad, Sarah, Dad

1474
01:04:50,200 --> 01:04:54,520
Speaker 4: fully in agreement Robert, you and that's what get what

1475
01:04:54,600 --> 01:04:55,000
Speaker 4: you deserve.

1476
01:04:55,200 --> 01:04:58,160
Speaker 8: You know what, when Alpha Centauri becomes a black hole,

1477
01:04:58,320 --> 01:05:00,400
Speaker 8: you're the first one that's getting thrown into it. I'll

1478
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:03,400
Speaker 8: tell you that much. Anyway, let's finish this story. Our

1479
01:05:03,480 --> 01:05:07,120
Speaker 8: relatives on Robert's side surprisingly support my mom.

1480
01:05:07,480 --> 01:05:10,440
Speaker 4: Though Robert will be staying at his parents. They are

1481
01:05:10,480 --> 01:05:13,760
Speaker 4: disappointed in him, according to my aunt, Robert's sister, but

1482
01:05:14,120 --> 01:05:17,080
Speaker 4: he was still their child. My mom understood them and

1483
01:05:17,200 --> 01:05:19,800
Speaker 4: minded her own business. My husband and I had a

1484
01:05:19,800 --> 01:05:22,680
Speaker 4: great honeymoon. We haven't heard much from Robert. The twins

1485
01:05:22,800 --> 01:05:25,360
Speaker 4: entered their last year of high school. So yeah, this

1486
01:05:25,400 --> 01:05:27,880
Speaker 4: will be our only update. I have told my mom

1487
01:05:27,880 --> 01:05:29,840
Speaker 4: that I'll be deleting her Reddit for the sake of

1488
01:05:29,880 --> 01:05:33,120
Speaker 4: her mental health. Thank you everyone for leaving kind messages

1489
01:05:33,120 --> 01:05:36,280
Speaker 4: and God bless And that is the end of that story,

1490
01:05:36,320 --> 01:05:39,000
Speaker 4: and I'm so glad it doesn't involve Robert at all.

1491
01:05:39,120 --> 01:05:41,840
Speaker 4: My wedding night fell off the rails.

1492
01:05:41,760 --> 01:05:45,760
Speaker 5: Because of a complete strange, stranger danger, stranger danger.

1493
01:05:46,000 --> 01:05:49,080
Speaker 8: My wedding was not traditional and we essentially had a

1494
01:05:49,080 --> 01:05:52,200
Speaker 8: courthouse wedding, but had one of my husband's family members

1495
01:05:52,240 --> 01:05:54,040
Speaker 8: became ordained to wed us.

1496
01:05:54,200 --> 01:05:57,439
Speaker 4: That's nice. The morning and afternoon was amazing and very chill.

1497
01:05:57,840 --> 01:06:00,240
Speaker 4: By the way, this comes from user important part Mark

1498
01:06:00,240 --> 01:06:03,760
Speaker 4: seventy eight eighty two on the r slash Okay storytime subreddit.

1499
01:06:04,240 --> 01:06:06,840
Speaker 4: So fast forward to the evening.

1500
01:06:07,040 --> 01:06:09,760
Speaker 8: We had no concrete plans other than to bar hop

1501
01:06:10,040 --> 01:06:12,040
Speaker 8: since the city we were in has a great night

1502
01:06:12,120 --> 01:06:14,760
Speaker 8: life and tons of unique bars from.

1503
01:06:14,640 --> 01:06:16,760
Speaker 4: Dive bars to fancy ones as well.

1504
01:06:17,040 --> 01:06:19,840
Speaker 8: No one was overly drinking and everyone was having a

1505
01:06:19,880 --> 01:06:23,320
Speaker 8: great time until I realized I started my period late

1506
01:06:23,360 --> 01:06:26,280
Speaker 8: into the night and needed to find some feminine products

1507
01:06:26,280 --> 01:06:28,480
Speaker 8: somewhere so we didn't have to uber home before the

1508
01:06:28,600 --> 01:06:31,680
Speaker 8: night was over. So this is when the night turns

1509
01:06:31,720 --> 01:06:35,959
Speaker 8: into something unexpected. For context as well, we are all

1510
01:06:36,040 --> 01:06:39,480
Speaker 8: mid twenties and we are all white except for my

1511
01:06:39,640 --> 01:06:42,760
Speaker 8: friend's boyfriend, who is African American. There were five of

1512
01:06:42,840 --> 01:06:46,160
Speaker 8: us all walking along the sidewalk, and admittedly it wasn't

1513
01:06:46,160 --> 01:06:48,280
Speaker 8: the best street we were walking down, but it did

1514
01:06:48,320 --> 01:06:49,800
Speaker 8: have a lot of street lights, and there were a

1515
01:06:49,800 --> 01:06:52,960
Speaker 8: few people around. There's my husband and I walking in front,

1516
01:06:53,320 --> 01:06:56,080
Speaker 8: with me on the street side. My husband's friend is

1517
01:06:56,080 --> 01:06:59,320
Speaker 8: in the middle, and my best friend and her boyfriend

1518
01:06:59,600 --> 01:07:02,680
Speaker 8: is in the back with her also on the street side. Well,

1519
01:07:02,760 --> 01:07:06,160
Speaker 8: this man almost shoulder checked me, but I moved out

1520
01:07:06,200 --> 01:07:08,840
Speaker 8: of the way, got close to our friend in the middle,

1521
01:07:09,160 --> 01:07:12,760
Speaker 8: and also dodged the man, and the guy moved in

1522
01:07:12,800 --> 01:07:16,400
Speaker 8: front of my best friend towards her boyfriend and shoulder

1523
01:07:16,480 --> 01:07:20,680
Speaker 8: checked him hard. I didn't see this, but it was

1524
01:07:20,720 --> 01:07:24,200
Speaker 8: what they said. And my best friend screams at the man,

1525
01:07:24,720 --> 01:07:28,320
Speaker 8: you effing racist, which is when I turn around and

1526
01:07:28,360 --> 01:07:30,760
Speaker 8: I'm trying to figure out what's going on.

1527
01:07:31,080 --> 01:07:32,960
Speaker 5: This guy just has a vendetta. He just wants it.

1528
01:07:32,960 --> 01:07:35,600
Speaker 4: Seems like there's he's mad at the world, drunken, disorderly

1529
01:07:35,640 --> 01:07:38,280
Speaker 4: man who's just mad, a problem at everything.

1530
01:07:38,480 --> 01:07:42,720
Speaker 8: At that point, the man yells racial slur, I will

1531
01:07:42,760 --> 01:07:45,919
Speaker 8: effing on a live view, oh no, while reaching into

1532
01:07:45,960 --> 01:07:50,480
Speaker 8: his pocket. Definitely, definitely, definitely trying to cause problems. I

1533
01:07:50,520 --> 01:07:53,120
Speaker 8: am internally freaking out, and I'm telling everyone to just

1534
01:07:53,200 --> 01:07:57,000
Speaker 8: keep moving rightfully. The boyfriend was pissed and angry and

1535
01:07:57,040 --> 01:07:59,400
Speaker 8: we're all trying to make sure he's okay and to

1536
01:07:59,480 --> 01:08:01,880
Speaker 8: keep him from attempting to fight that man. That is

1537
01:08:01,960 --> 01:08:05,040
Speaker 8: always the best move in pretty much any situation. Do

1538
01:08:05,200 --> 01:08:08,360
Speaker 8: not escalate the conflict unless someone pushes your mom. After

1539
01:08:08,480 --> 01:08:12,760
Speaker 8: a failed search for feminine products, I make do and

1540
01:08:12,800 --> 01:08:16,040
Speaker 8: we walked to a nearby bar. My best friend and

1541
01:08:16,120 --> 01:08:20,880
Speaker 8: her boyfriend are silently and angrily texting each other the

1542
01:08:21,040 --> 01:08:24,600
Speaker 8: entire way there end up the elevator. Now, I know

1543
01:08:24,680 --> 01:08:27,559
Speaker 8: I probably made the mistake of saying this, but I

1544
01:08:27,640 --> 01:08:30,280
Speaker 8: felt all the tension in the air, like a giant

1545
01:08:30,400 --> 01:08:33,600
Speaker 8: rain cloud over everyone, and in an attempt to do

1546
01:08:33,680 --> 01:08:36,360
Speaker 8: what I thought was to calm this situation down, I

1547
01:08:36,400 --> 01:08:39,600
Speaker 8: had said something along the lines of quote, Hey, I

1548
01:08:39,640 --> 01:08:42,599
Speaker 8: don't think he was targeting you. That was really messed up,

1549
01:08:42,680 --> 01:08:45,320
Speaker 8: and I'm sorry, but can we please move on? And

1550
01:08:45,360 --> 01:08:47,800
Speaker 8: then I was yelled at by my best friend and

1551
01:08:47,920 --> 01:08:52,880
Speaker 8: their anger had increased. Yes, big regret on my part. Yeah,

1552
01:08:52,920 --> 01:08:54,160
Speaker 8: that's not what you do in that situation.

1553
01:08:54,200 --> 01:08:56,160
Speaker 5: Oh, he's just trying to make the best of the situation.

1554
01:08:56,520 --> 01:08:58,840
Speaker 5: She just got married, so she's like, let's just have fun,

1555
01:08:59,160 --> 01:09:01,519
Speaker 5: like but trying to be like, don't worry about it,

1556
01:09:01,520 --> 01:09:03,120
Speaker 5: move past, dude, Like, I don't know.

1557
01:09:03,240 --> 01:09:05,240
Speaker 8: In my head, I wonder how much well you know,

1558
01:09:05,360 --> 01:09:08,200
Speaker 8: I get not wanting us one thing to weigh everyone down,

1559
01:09:08,479 --> 01:09:10,040
Speaker 8: But was it weighing everyone down?

1560
01:09:10,080 --> 01:09:10,519
Speaker 4: You know what I mean?

1561
01:09:10,600 --> 01:09:14,160
Speaker 5: It seems because it was like an awkward situation. Everyone

1562
01:09:14,280 --> 01:09:17,479
Speaker 5: is just like that was really dumb, and the night's

1563
01:09:17,560 --> 01:09:19,519
Speaker 5: kind of ruined. Now, if the night on once that

1564
01:09:19,520 --> 01:09:22,840
Speaker 5: happens got such like an event, the night's kind of ruined. Unfortunately,

1565
01:09:22,840 --> 01:09:24,640
Speaker 5: that's gonna be the mindset. You could try and change it,

1566
01:09:24,720 --> 01:09:27,960
Speaker 5: but once you're down, ear down, you can't. Like, ah, man, I.

1567
01:09:27,880 --> 01:09:30,600
Speaker 8: Mean, I can't imagine how I'd feel in that situation.

1568
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:33,479
Speaker 8: I'd be I mean, I'm sure i'd be livid, like

1569
01:09:33,880 --> 01:09:36,360
Speaker 8: you know, would make me even more upset someone telling

1570
01:09:36,400 --> 01:09:39,360
Speaker 8: me like, hey, don't worry about that anymore, you're ruining

1571
01:09:39,439 --> 01:09:41,479
Speaker 8: mine eye. I'd be like, oh am, I ruining the night?

1572
01:09:41,560 --> 01:09:44,920
Speaker 8: All right, bye, I'm out. Every bar we went to

1573
01:09:45,240 --> 01:09:48,600
Speaker 8: it was awkward. She spent the entire night trying to

1574
01:09:48,640 --> 01:09:51,760
Speaker 8: console him, and no longer was really socializing with me

1575
01:09:52,000 --> 01:09:54,080
Speaker 8: due to this side note, she might not be socializing

1576
01:09:54,120 --> 01:09:55,760
Speaker 8: with you because of what you said, just putting it

1577
01:09:55,800 --> 01:09:58,360
Speaker 8: out there. A series of events occurred, like him not

1578
01:09:58,439 --> 01:10:01,599
Speaker 8: saying a single word the entire night except to her.

1579
01:10:01,880 --> 01:10:05,920
Speaker 8: He spilt water on my head on accident, but it

1580
01:10:06,040 --> 01:10:07,240
Speaker 8: just kept adding up.

1581
01:10:07,439 --> 01:10:09,599
Speaker 4: I wanted to send them home quite frankly.

1582
01:10:10,040 --> 01:10:12,240
Speaker 8: After we got back home, she spoke to me privately

1583
01:10:12,320 --> 01:10:15,920
Speaker 8: about the situation. I'm intoxicated at the time and apologized

1584
01:10:15,920 --> 01:10:18,080
Speaker 8: if I came off as insensitive, but I was just

1585
01:10:18,120 --> 01:10:20,680
Speaker 8: trying to have a good night. It ended with her

1586
01:10:20,720 --> 01:10:24,120
Speaker 8: scolding me again, telling me I could never understand what

1587
01:10:24,200 --> 01:10:27,200
Speaker 8: struggles they go through and how I just don't understand,

1588
01:10:27,479 --> 01:10:30,320
Speaker 8: and she knew he was targeted, and they've had weird

1589
01:10:30,479 --> 01:10:34,000
Speaker 8: experiences the entire time that they've been down here. Well,

1590
01:10:34,240 --> 01:10:36,760
Speaker 8: I started crying, and then she raised her voice and

1591
01:10:36,800 --> 01:10:39,200
Speaker 8: told me she could never have a conversation with me

1592
01:10:39,280 --> 01:10:40,759
Speaker 8: because I always start crying.

1593
01:10:41,000 --> 01:10:41,839
Speaker 4: Well, the last.

1594
01:10:41,720 --> 01:10:44,400
Speaker 8: Few times she decided to talk about something serious with me,

1595
01:10:44,520 --> 01:10:47,880
Speaker 8: we've been drinking. Anyway, I put myself together, and then

1596
01:10:47,920 --> 01:10:50,880
Speaker 8: we continued to play a card game, and then everyone

1597
01:10:50,960 --> 01:10:54,519
Speaker 8: split off and went to bed. Then all night they

1598
01:10:54,560 --> 01:10:57,280
Speaker 8: were arguing in their room loud enough we could all hear.

1599
01:10:57,520 --> 01:10:58,519
Speaker 3: Why are they arguing?

1600
01:10:58,600 --> 01:11:00,840
Speaker 5: I don't know, probably we got to get the context here.

1601
01:11:00,960 --> 01:11:01,320
Speaker 3: Okay.

1602
01:11:01,520 --> 01:11:06,200
Speaker 8: The only conversation that was had months later, when her

1603
01:11:06,200 --> 01:11:09,960
Speaker 8: and I were admittedly a little drinky on FaceTime. It

1604
01:11:10,000 --> 01:11:12,439
Speaker 8: came up terrible timing. I didn't even want to talk

1605
01:11:12,439 --> 01:11:15,719
Speaker 8: about it, honestly, But her stance is that the entire

1606
01:11:15,800 --> 01:11:19,840
Speaker 8: town is racist against interracial couples, and they were stared

1607
01:11:19,880 --> 01:11:22,519
Speaker 8: at the entire time, and I think that guy was

1608
01:11:22,640 --> 01:11:25,360
Speaker 8: just looking to start a fight with anyone. This is

1609
01:11:25,400 --> 01:11:27,760
Speaker 8: a Southern town, but it's in a city where the

1610
01:11:27,800 --> 01:11:31,320
Speaker 8: population is majority African American. We were actually in a

1611
01:11:31,400 --> 01:11:34,479
Speaker 8: very progressive city in the South. Some context to their

1612
01:11:34,520 --> 01:11:37,680
Speaker 8: mindset is that they came down with the expectation they

1613
01:11:37,720 --> 01:11:40,720
Speaker 8: were going to be treated differently because his parents did

1614
01:11:40,800 --> 01:11:43,280
Speaker 8: nothing but talk about how racist the South is to

1615
01:11:43,320 --> 01:11:45,559
Speaker 8: both of them the entire time leading up to this.

1616
01:11:45,680 --> 01:11:48,000
Speaker 8: It felt as though they were waiting for something to happen.

1617
01:11:48,360 --> 01:11:50,879
Speaker 8: She said a restaurant was racist because when the waitress

1618
01:11:50,920 --> 01:11:53,240
Speaker 8: was taking drink orders for the party of seven, they

1619
01:11:53,280 --> 01:11:56,720
Speaker 8: didn't take his. But during that time, his face was

1620
01:11:56,800 --> 01:11:59,320
Speaker 8: down into the menu and he didn't bother to look up.

1621
01:11:59,520 --> 01:12:02,000
Speaker 8: And I know because I was sitting directly across from him.

1622
01:12:02,080 --> 01:12:05,200
Speaker 8: We're all from the Northwestern States except my husband and

1623
01:12:05,360 --> 01:12:09,000
Speaker 8: his friend, so I understand the culture shock from being

1624
01:12:09,160 --> 01:12:12,719
Speaker 8: in the Pacific Northwest and the South is wildly different.

1625
01:12:12,920 --> 01:12:15,960
Speaker 8: I've dated people of color before, and a quarter of

1626
01:12:15,960 --> 01:12:18,920
Speaker 8: my family is African American and my best male friend

1627
01:12:19,040 --> 01:12:21,439
Speaker 8: at the time is also mixed, so I feel like

1628
01:12:21,479 --> 01:12:23,599
Speaker 8: I have a general understanding of what it's like to

1629
01:12:23,600 --> 01:12:26,759
Speaker 8: be stared at in public by people who have questionable views.

1630
01:12:27,040 --> 01:12:29,080
Speaker 8: I don't know, Pete, that was a pretty questionable view

1631
01:12:29,160 --> 01:12:33,000
Speaker 8: right there. That's a pretty sweeping generalization for you to make.

1632
01:12:33,400 --> 01:12:36,840
Speaker 8: You're like, I have friends who aren't white, so I

1633
01:12:36,880 --> 01:12:39,920
Speaker 8: think I know what it's like to not be white.

1634
01:12:39,640 --> 01:12:44,519
Speaker 5: And I'm one fourth compared to when the boyfriend is full.

1635
01:12:44,760 --> 01:12:45,360
Speaker 5: It's different.

1636
01:12:45,479 --> 01:12:47,400
Speaker 4: I don't even think she's saying she's one fourth. I

1637
01:12:47,439 --> 01:12:50,560
Speaker 4: just think she was just saying a fourth of her family.

1638
01:12:50,360 --> 01:12:52,320
Speaker 5: Oh, a fourth of her family. Oh I thought she

1639
01:12:52,479 --> 01:12:52,920
Speaker 5: was one four.

1640
01:12:53,000 --> 01:12:53,120
Speaker 2: No.

1641
01:12:53,280 --> 01:12:55,720
Speaker 8: Oh, yeah, you're just saying, like, there's people in my

1642
01:12:55,840 --> 01:12:56,599
Speaker 8: family who.

1643
01:12:56,479 --> 01:12:58,800
Speaker 5: Are Wow for you American. You don't know. I don't

1644
01:12:58,840 --> 01:12:59,040
Speaker 5: like that.

1645
01:12:59,280 --> 01:13:00,760
Speaker 4: I don't like that. You know what I do like?

1646
01:13:01,160 --> 01:13:01,600
Speaker 5: What do you like?

1647
01:13:01,720 --> 01:13:05,760
Speaker 8: I like everybody watching this right now joining us when

1648
01:13:05,800 --> 01:13:10,599
Speaker 8: we go live on YouTube, Facebook, TikTok, and Twitch every

1649
01:13:10,640 --> 01:13:11,760
Speaker 8: weekday at three pm PST.

1650
01:13:11,840 --> 01:13:13,680
Speaker 4: All you gotta do is tap our profile and you're in.

1651
01:13:14,240 --> 01:13:16,320
Speaker 5: Hey, we might even be live right now.

1652
01:13:16,560 --> 01:13:18,479
Speaker 8: Don't check yet. Wait, we got a little bit left.

1653
01:13:18,600 --> 01:13:21,479
Speaker 8: We're going to recap here, which you know, I think

1654
01:13:21,520 --> 01:13:24,840
Speaker 8: there could be some truth to the statement that the

1655
01:13:24,920 --> 01:13:27,960
Speaker 8: guy that ran into them was just looking to start

1656
01:13:28,000 --> 01:13:31,559
Speaker 8: a fight with anybody. However, he immediately escalated it into

1657
01:13:31,560 --> 01:13:32,559
Speaker 8: basically a hate crime.

1658
01:13:32,760 --> 01:13:35,519
Speaker 5: Yeah, because again at the very beginning he shoulder checked

1659
01:13:35,680 --> 01:13:36,519
Speaker 5: op right.

1660
01:13:36,760 --> 01:13:38,880
Speaker 8: I think he was trying to there was like a

1661
01:13:38,920 --> 01:13:41,360
Speaker 8: whole chart that we could have written about, like where

1662
01:13:41,400 --> 01:13:42,840
Speaker 8: people were standing.

1663
01:13:42,560 --> 01:13:45,880
Speaker 5: He like check someone and then like yeah, split up

1664
01:13:45,880 --> 01:13:47,000
Speaker 5: the group and then shoulder checked.

1665
01:13:47,120 --> 01:13:48,599
Speaker 8: I don't think he was going to try to shoulder

1666
01:13:48,680 --> 01:13:51,160
Speaker 8: check one of the girls to then make one of

1667
01:13:51,200 --> 01:13:52,719
Speaker 8: the men like ite angry.

1668
01:13:52,960 --> 01:13:55,320
Speaker 4: I don't know, but that guy sucks.

1669
01:13:55,360 --> 01:13:58,559
Speaker 8: But he immediately made it about race when he used

1670
01:13:58,560 --> 01:14:03,000
Speaker 8: a slur and threatened their well being, Like so you know,

1671
01:14:03,439 --> 01:14:06,160
Speaker 8: then wanting to be the voice of like, oh, let's

1672
01:14:06,200 --> 01:14:08,559
Speaker 8: try to make everyone happy. It's like I think just

1673
01:14:08,640 --> 01:14:12,360
Speaker 8: telling them that they weren't actually targeted, and that that

1674
01:14:12,479 --> 01:14:14,839
Speaker 8: they should just start moving on from it already.

1675
01:14:15,080 --> 01:14:17,519
Speaker 4: You've let a little bit at whatever rate they're going

1676
01:14:17,560 --> 01:14:18,960
Speaker 4: to process it at OPI.

1677
01:14:18,920 --> 01:14:21,479
Speaker 5: It's weird, but like Opie has a little bit of privilege.

1678
01:14:21,479 --> 01:14:23,559
Speaker 8: Of course, Yeah, you have the privilege of being able

1679
01:14:23,600 --> 01:14:26,360
Speaker 8: to say getting racial slurred didn't affect me at all

1680
01:14:26,760 --> 01:14:27,679
Speaker 8: because I'm white.

1681
01:14:27,880 --> 01:14:29,719
Speaker 4: Of Course you can move on from that, Ope.

1682
01:14:29,680 --> 01:14:32,240
Speaker 5: Opie said, I can generalize this like I can see

1683
01:14:32,240 --> 01:14:32,960
Speaker 5: the context.

1684
01:14:33,000 --> 01:14:36,559
Speaker 8: No, I guess overall, I'm still not sure how to

1685
01:14:36,600 --> 01:14:39,840
Speaker 8: process this. My wedding anniversary is coming up again and

1686
01:14:39,960 --> 01:14:43,080
Speaker 8: it's on my mind again. I'm even thinking about seeking

1687
01:14:43,120 --> 01:14:45,840
Speaker 8: therapy over this to understand why this still affects me

1688
01:14:45,880 --> 01:14:48,280
Speaker 8: so much. I don't like to think I have any

1689
01:14:48,400 --> 01:14:52,360
Speaker 8: internal racism going on, but this situation has me questioning myself.

1690
01:14:52,640 --> 01:14:54,720
Speaker 8: I'm sad when I look back on my wedding day

1691
01:14:54,760 --> 01:14:57,280
Speaker 8: because I just remember how the night went and the

1692
01:14:57,280 --> 01:15:01,040
Speaker 8: most awkward week ever following that. I never received an

1693
01:15:01,080 --> 01:15:04,160
Speaker 8: apology from him, and I don't want one for him

1694
01:15:04,200 --> 01:15:06,519
Speaker 8: being upset by the situation, but at least for his

1695
01:15:06,600 --> 01:15:08,120
Speaker 8: behavior that following week.

1696
01:15:08,400 --> 01:15:09,639
Speaker 4: And that is the end of that story.

1697
01:15:09,680 --> 01:15:10,880
Speaker 5: That's a poopy taste in my mouth.

1698
01:15:11,000 --> 01:15:13,280
Speaker 8: It's like you're so close to almost getting it and

1699
01:15:13,320 --> 01:15:14,280
Speaker 8: then like you're like not.

1700
01:15:14,600 --> 01:15:16,640
Speaker 5: But that's the thing. I just don't like saying it.

1701
01:15:16,640 --> 01:15:19,040
Speaker 5: But like, again, the privilege, you're just privileged because you

1702
01:15:19,080 --> 01:15:23,920
Speaker 5: don't understand racism. Again, as someone who's experienced racism and

1703
01:15:24,000 --> 01:15:26,679
Speaker 5: all that stuff, it sucks. Guess what. I have friends

1704
01:15:26,720 --> 01:15:30,479
Speaker 5: who just don't understand it or like they're like, oh, Okay,

1705
01:15:30,520 --> 01:15:33,160
Speaker 5: that sucks, but like you know, it's just it's different

1706
01:15:33,240 --> 01:15:36,640
Speaker 5: layers and getting privilege. It sucks. That's how it is.

1707
01:15:36,840 --> 01:15:38,800
Speaker 5: This should be a little bit more empathy from op.

1708
01:15:39,200 --> 01:15:42,360
Speaker 8: Yeah, like they're privileged in that their ignorance. They've been

1709
01:15:42,400 --> 01:15:45,040
Speaker 8: able to just get by being that ignorant their whole life.

1710
01:15:45,080 --> 01:15:46,320
Speaker 4: But that's the end of that story.