Speaker 1: It is time now for my Strawberry Letter for today,
Speaker 1: and if you need advice on relationships, dating, work, sex, parenting,
Speaker 1: and more, please submit your Strawberry Letter to STEVEBARVFM dot
Speaker 1: com and click submit Strawberry Letter. We could be reading
Speaker 1: your letter live on the air, just like we're gonna read.
Speaker 2: What are you laughing about, Tommy? You're making me laugh
Speaker 2: right us. We want to hear from you. Okay, this
Speaker 2: letter right here could be yours. It could be yours.
Speaker 3: Buggle up and hold on tight. We got it for you.
Speaker 4: Here it is Strawberry Letter.
Speaker 2: Oh not laughing. You haven't even heard the letter yet.
Speaker 2: Here we go. Subject.
Speaker 1: I'm trying to hold it together. Thank you, nephew. Dear
Speaker 1: Stephen Shirley. I've been with the same woman for twenty
Speaker 1: nine years and we've been married for twenty six years.
Speaker 1: We have five children and fourteen grandchildren. On the outside,
Speaker 1: looking in, it looks like we are a beautiful retired couple.
Speaker 1: But on the inside, our marriage is in turmoil. My
Speaker 1: wife is having an affair and I found out when
Speaker 1: I read her emails. It's like she wanted me to
Speaker 1: find out because she knows. I go into her computer
Speaker 1: all the time. Based on what I read, they've been
Speaker 1: seeing each other off and on for over ten years.
Speaker 1: The saving grace for her is that she tells her
Speaker 1: lover that she loves me and that she'll never leave
Speaker 1: me because I'm the best thing that ever happened to her.
Speaker 1: It's ironic that I cheated on her many times, but
Speaker 1: I was never sloppy enough for her to find out.
Speaker 1: I feel like she wants to have a conversation about it,
Speaker 1: since she hasn't deleted any of the emails. I also
Speaker 1: know the guy well and we've played tennis together a
Speaker 1: couple of times in the past few years.
Speaker 2: My wife had sex with a.
Speaker 1: Man that I know, and he's been smiling in my face.
Speaker 1: That's the part that hurts the most because I bet
Speaker 1: he feels like he got over on me. I'm trying
Speaker 1: to hold it together and I'm debate on whether or
Speaker 1: not I'm going to talk to my wife. I have
Speaker 1: no right to be upset because I have had my
Speaker 1: fun on the side. If she knew I was cheating,
Speaker 1: she never said a word to me. I need advice.
Speaker 1: Should I confront my wife or let it go?
Speaker 2: Okay? I'm confused as to.
Speaker 1: You know what you are upset about and all of
Speaker 1: that because you did the same thing. I mean, whether
Speaker 1: you talk to her or not, you really don't have
Speaker 1: a leg to stand on here, sir.
Speaker 2: You cheat it she cheated.
Speaker 1: Now we're here with you trying to nitpick on how
Speaker 1: she dated, who she dated, and what all happened, et cetera, etc.
Speaker 1: You should feel some kind of way because cheating hurts,
Speaker 1: doesn't it. It really does hurt. We know about double standards,
Speaker 1: so we talk about them a lot on this show.
Speaker 1: It was okay when you were doing it. Just because
Speaker 1: she didn't find out doesn't mean you know it was cool.
Speaker 1: But you've been doing it for years now. You guys
Speaker 1: have been together for twenty nine years. That's a long time,
Speaker 1: and you guys need a reset here. Instead of turning
Speaker 1: to other people for your happiness, you need to try
Speaker 1: and find your way back to each other if you can,
Speaker 1: if the both of you want to stay in this marriage,
Speaker 1: I suggest counseling. I suggest therapy immediately. And of course
Speaker 1: here's the thing that maybe you didn't think about. Stop cheating.
Speaker 1: Let those side pieces go. How about that, Tommy.
Speaker 4: It ain't no fun. When the rabbit got the gun. Yes, Yes,
Speaker 4: you have cheated in the past. She is cheating now,
Speaker 4: cheating with somebody you play tennis with. You think he's
Speaker 4: gotten one over you, and you want to know should
Speaker 4: you say something? What should you say? What can you say?
Speaker 4: Here's what I think. You don't think she knows about you.
Speaker 4: She knows, she knows you're cheating. She know exactly who
Speaker 4: you cheated with, and she don't care. And that's why
Speaker 4: she don't care. Nothing about the dug On emails that
Speaker 4: you saw. She wanted you to see that me maw.
Speaker 4: She wanted you to know that she did it too.
Speaker 4: She does not care that you have ran up on
Speaker 4: this information that that she waiting on you to bring
Speaker 4: it up.
Speaker 2: Here's the thing.
Speaker 4: When you were somebody does to you what you've already
Speaker 4: done to them. Now you want to say something, and
Speaker 4: I don't. I don't think you should say anything. I
Speaker 4: think you should just be quiet. You got to you
Speaker 4: just got to ice it out. Don't say a word,
Speaker 4: but you can start working on having a better relationship.
Speaker 4: She done, She done it to you, You've done it
Speaker 4: to huh. Let's just let's try to get past that
Speaker 4: part and see if you can still salvage the relationship.
Speaker 4: She still loves you up dently if she's telling the
Speaker 4: side piece that you clear clearly, clearly she has not
Speaker 4: let that fade away. So the love is still there
Speaker 4: and you must still love her too, because you done
Speaker 4: took time write this letter, let us know about all
Speaker 4: your grand babies and everything else. I don't know what
Speaker 4: that's got to do with anything, but anyway, y'all been
Speaker 4: together over twenty some years. I think I think you
Speaker 4: need to start spending more time with your wife. There's
Speaker 4: a way for you to spend enough time with your
Speaker 4: wife that you can actually fade out whatever else she
Speaker 4: got going on, and she don't have time for that.
Speaker 4: But now you got to start putting some effort towards
Speaker 4: your wife, which is what you should have been doing
Speaker 4: in the first place. Giving your wife all the time
Speaker 4: she needs, as y'all, or a comfort you're supposed to
Speaker 4: give her everything, Go out on dates, start all over.
Speaker 4: Do what you got to do to get your wife
Speaker 4: back to where she's like, I got enough with just
Speaker 4: my man, I don't need this other do put the
Speaker 4: time in with your wife. That's what you're gonna have
Speaker 4: to do now, Even though I want you to do that.
Speaker 4: I still want you to go down there to that
Speaker 4: tennis coat, yeah, and get that racket and accidentally swing
Speaker 4: that racket and crack him across the back. I just
Speaker 4: I just think one good crack cross the back. It
Speaker 4: just make you feel a whole lot. That's what's bothering you?
Speaker 2: Is bother you? That is That is Randall.
Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying. But that's what's body.
Speaker 3: That is.
Speaker 4: Randal has been over there all this time with your girl.
Speaker 4: That's the problem and you that's what That's what bothers
Speaker 4: any man. Well, what bothers a man is when he knows.
Speaker 4: Now he done read it, and he knows, and it
Speaker 4: just ain't sitting well.
Speaker 2: All right, hang on, hang on, nephew, thank you.
Speaker 1: We're gonna have part two of our response to today's
Speaker 1: Strawberry Letters, and I have.
Speaker 3: To whoop Randall.
Speaker 2: Twenty three minutes after the hour. We will hear from
Speaker 2: Junior when we come back right after.
Speaker 3: They not gonna like mine.
Speaker 4: Randall told her who you was messing with.
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Speaker 1: All right, we're going to recap today's strawberry letter. This
Speaker 1: title is the subject is I'm trying to hold it
Speaker 1: together now? A man wrote in he's twenty nine. He's
Speaker 1: been married to his wife for twenty nine years, twenty
Speaker 1: six years. They've been together for twenty nine years. They
Speaker 1: have five children, fourteen grandchildren. It looks like they have
Speaker 1: this perfect marriage on the outside, but inside they're cheating.
Speaker 1: He just found out that his wife is cheating with
Speaker 1: a guy he knows, and he really can't say anything
Speaker 1: because he's cheated on his wife lots of times. You know,
Speaker 1: he's mad because his wife had sex with a man
Speaker 1: that he knows and who has been smiling in his face,
Speaker 1: so his ego is affected here. He says, that's the
Speaker 1: part that hurts the most, and because he thinks the
Speaker 1: guy feels that he got over on the husband. Well,
Speaker 1: whether he did or not, you're upset about it. But
Speaker 1: you say you have no right to be, and I
Speaker 1: agree with you because you've had your fun on the side.
Speaker 1: And if she knew you were cheating, you said, she
Speaker 1: never said a word to you. And you want advice.
Speaker 1: Should you confront your wife or let it go?
Speaker 2: Junior, you're up? What do you say?
Speaker 6: Yeah, you're not gonna like my answers, Shirley said, let
Speaker 6: me just gone ahead and just get this out the way.
Speaker 3: Earlier. I don't understand. I don't care.
Speaker 6: I don't know why you put in the five kids
Speaker 6: and the fourteen grandchildren got nothing to do with this,
Speaker 6: nothing that's irrelevant. I just don't understand how Now. I
Speaker 6: know you cheated and got all that, but we're not
Speaker 6: talking about you now. This is not what we're doing.
Speaker 6: This is what you found out. You mean to tell me,
Speaker 6: I'm sitting here listening to Shirley read this letter. You
Speaker 6: mean to tell me you read the emails and just
Speaker 6: went on with life.
Speaker 3: That's what you did. You mean telling you read.
Speaker 6: This email because he said, she said to this man,
Speaker 6: she's man, I love him and I.
Speaker 3: Ain't never leaving him.
Speaker 2: You made that proud.
Speaker 3: Forget the fact she's sleeping with the man.
Speaker 6: That made you proud right there. So you just went
Speaker 6: on about life. So you just read that email and
Speaker 6: just had breakfast. You ain't said nothing. You just went
Speaker 6: on with life.
Speaker 2: Huh.
Speaker 6: So you just read the email and just got it
Speaker 6: the shower. You just just just lathering up.
Speaker 2: You're there risting off.
Speaker 3: You read this. You read the email, and the same.
Speaker 6: Woman sleep with the man you took on vacation. Of
Speaker 6: course he looking over you, man, Yeah, he getting over.
Speaker 6: He ain't got none of these problems. You read that
Speaker 6: email and then you went and brought her a new car.
Speaker 3: How crazy is you?
Speaker 2: Are? You?
Speaker 3: You just going on with life. Ain't nothing wrong here?
Speaker 6: You You you read that email and took her to dinner.
Speaker 6: You sitting up here with the man playing tennis, and
Speaker 6: you know he's sleeping with your wife.
Speaker 3: How is this possible?
Speaker 4: Man?
Speaker 3: Lord, man, get some backbone or something.
Speaker 2: Uh huh, you ain't you.
Speaker 3: You got to do something, dude. You just up here?
Speaker 3: You just up here? Man, you up there? The man
Speaker 3: sleeping with your wife? You the read email. Now you're
Speaker 3: at the hospital because you finna get another grandchild? What
Speaker 3: did you do?
Speaker 6: What did you do with the labor and delivery with
Speaker 6: your wife? And she got an affair?
Speaker 3: Why is you in there? We got thirteen other grand baby?
Speaker 3: I'm catting up about to you know what? What you
Speaker 3: just going on with life? Man? You ain't saying nothing.
Speaker 3: So you just in there? You just in there, your wife,
Speaker 3: you'd have read the email. You see what the man?
Speaker 3: Now you're in church with your hands up. Praise God.
Speaker 3: He's got He is so good to me. What is
Speaker 3: you doing, though, God? What is you doing?
Speaker 5: What matter?
Speaker 6: Fact? If you in an email, why you didn't hit
Speaker 6: the reply button and send your message back?
Speaker 2: Oh? What would it have said? Though?
Speaker 4: Height?
Speaker 3: Man? I know you we played tennis together. I see
Speaker 3: it this Saturday.
Speaker 6: But I'm not bringing my racket, bringing my golf club,
Speaker 6: bringing the club, bring something out. We ain't We ain't
Speaker 6: gonna hat this. I don't understand how this this You
Speaker 6: just said, Okay, I got caught. You know, I cheated
Speaker 6: on her, but put it in her face. But this
Speaker 6: is all in your face and you just going on
Speaker 6: with life. Dog what man is this?
Speaker 3: I don't know. No man, like I tell you something.
Speaker 6: I know some men who've done it, and they I
Speaker 6: know they've cheated.
Speaker 3: I know, but they never put in their white face.
Speaker 3: But I'll be.
Speaker 6: Dog on if I sit down here, we got to
Speaker 6: read my white email. Hold on, hold on, and you're
Speaker 6: right here is a double standing. Yeah, but you ain't
Speaker 6: gonna text about me. Why is y'all even discussed if
Speaker 6: you're cheating? Why am I a subject matter?
Speaker 2: Why am I in this? Why?
Speaker 3: What's your bringing me up?
Speaker 2: Folk?
Speaker 3: But I was cheating. I never mentioned your name. That
Speaker 3: was y'all even going by the rules.
Speaker 6: Of cheating, following the protocol y'all got to follow protocols, y'all.
Speaker 3: Y'all just talking about me. Now?
Speaker 6: You know my whole vacation schedule, so y'all can get together.
Speaker 6: He leaving town Wednesday, Now, y'all there together Wednsday through Sunday.
Speaker 6: Y'all know everything, y'all ain't gonna be talking about me.
Speaker 2: Why is it written anyway? Why why are they in? Email?
Speaker 3: Went up?
Speaker 2: I come here though, that's evident.
Speaker 1: Yeah, uh huh, you know everything by this man?
Speaker 3: My a one c went up. She told him.
Speaker 2: But I love my husband though, but I love my hoop.
Speaker 3: But I ain't never leaving. Oh no, you're gonna be leaving.
Speaker 3: It'll be forced to leave here.
Speaker 6: This don't make no sense. Somebody tell me I'm crazy.
Speaker 2: We know you're crazy, but I'm talking about that.
Speaker 6: If you read this email, dog, are we going about
Speaker 6: life the same way?
Speaker 2: No, we're not.
Speaker 3: We can't. This is impossible. I'm I'm mad.
Speaker 2: I'm you're mad. You're mad. I see it, You're mad.
Speaker 3: I'm mad like this my girl?
Speaker 2: All right, guys.
Speaker 1: Poster your comments on Today's Strawberry Letter at Steve Harvey
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Speaker 2: Sounded So Good. You can download it today now.
Speaker 1: Coming up at forty six minutes after the hour, Junior's
Speaker 1: gonna cool down and give us some sports talk.
Speaker 2: Right after this. You're listening to the Steve Harvey Morning
Speaker 2: Show