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Speaker 1: Hello everybody. I'm Jemma Spike and welcome back to the

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Speaker 1: Psychology of Your Twenties, the podcast where we talk through

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Speaker 1: the biggest changes, moments, and transitions of our twenties and

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Speaker 1: what they mean for our psychology. Hello everybody, Welcome back

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Speaker 1: to the show. Welcome back to the podcast. It is

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Speaker 1: so great to have you here back for another episode

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Speaker 1: as we of course break down the psychology of our twenties.

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Speaker 1: There has been one special individual that we have wanted

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Speaker 1: to have on the podcast for a long time, someone

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Speaker 1: who has had such an interesting career, trajectory and life

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Speaker 1: that I think contains so many lessons for others in

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Speaker 1: their twenties. She's basically lived many lives during this decade,

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Speaker 1: which is a testament to her work ethic, but also

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Speaker 1: I think just our general ability to evolve time and

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Speaker 1: time again. You may know her as the founder of

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Speaker 1: Tala Shreddy the Productivity Method, or if you are an

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Speaker 1: OG fan, for her workout guides and plans. She is

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Speaker 1: also the host of the podcast Working Hard at Oxford Grad.

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Speaker 1: A genuinely all around cool person who we know and love.

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Speaker 1: Grace Beverley, Welcome to the Psychology of Your twenties. Thank

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Speaker 1: you so much. We'll see you're so good at reading.

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Speaker 1: You must have loved when they came to you in

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Speaker 1: class and they were like, can you read this sentence? Pee?

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Speaker 1: You did not start at once? Well, I practice no idea.

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Speaker 1: That's amazing reading compression. I'm going to put that up

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Speaker 1: reading brandan one hand. Wid We were saying, like before

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Speaker 1: we started that, when I read out the interest, you're

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Speaker 1: like sitting right next week. Is it like singing somebody

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Speaker 1: singing you happy birthday?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but then also saying like ten nice things about

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Speaker 2: you afterwards.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, it is a lot. Okay, briefly introduce yourself,

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Speaker 1: tell us a little bit about who you are as

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Speaker 1: a person, and then we're going to do some icebreakers. Perfect,

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Speaker 1: So I'm grace. What am I going to say about myself? So?

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Speaker 2: I am an entrepreneur. I guess is probably like the

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Speaker 2: most all encompassing way of referring to what I do.

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Speaker 2: But it's, as you say, has evolved over the past

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Speaker 2: decade or so. So I started my first business when

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Speaker 2: I was in my first term or semester, I don't

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Speaker 2: know what you would call it at university, and I

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Speaker 2: have since started three more businesses, and I do a

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Speaker 2: lot of investing and advisory work as well on other

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Speaker 2: businesses that are kind of not in a similar space,

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Speaker 2: but essentially, like my expertise is around consumer businesses and

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Speaker 2: and kind of how they can appeal to their customers

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Speaker 2: and grow over time and all of that, so I

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Speaker 2: do a.

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Speaker 1: Lot of that work.

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Speaker 2: I also have a podcast, I do socials, I guess,

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Speaker 2: just generally showing what I am doing in my day

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Speaker 2: to day and my day to day job. I would

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Speaker 2: consider the work within the businesses because that is what

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Speaker 2: I do day to day. Sorry, by the way, if

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Speaker 2: I'm very gurgly and acid refluxy, I'm.

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Speaker 1: Afraid there's literally nothing we can do about. There is

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Speaker 1: something inside that There is a giant baby. It's like

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Speaker 1: encroaching upon my esophagus. And yeah, I just a baby.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't like it about Camascon that's in my bag. I

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Speaker 1: can't even tell you really, Yea, when you guys hear

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Speaker 1: a break and you know what we're doing. I love

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Speaker 1: that way of describing you because you're a very busy woman.

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Speaker 1: And before we get into what makes you busy, we're

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Speaker 1: gonna do a quick eyesbreaker. We ask these kind of

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Speaker 1: questions of all of our guests. Are you ready, I'm

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Speaker 1: so ready. Okay, Three to one favorite fast food order?

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Speaker 2: Okay, as you can tell, I'm really gonna.

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Speaker 1: Question. Fuck.

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Speaker 2: It's hard because I was veggie until quite recently, and

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Speaker 2: like that's not very well, you know, catered for and

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Speaker 2: in fast food. So now, like everything, every time I

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Speaker 2: do try fast food, it's like a whole new world.

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Speaker 2: So I don't know if it's my go to you know. Sorry,

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Speaker 2: I'm really bad at being concise.

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Speaker 1: This one I think will be easier. Please love last

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Speaker 1: thing you ordered online?

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Speaker 2: Oh so I'm renovating at the moment, and I have been. Honestly,

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Speaker 2: Etsy's market value has gone.

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Speaker 1: Up by about a trillion this week based on me

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Speaker 1: a lot of stock tip. Yeah sorry, this is a

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Speaker 1: stock tip value. Grace is on the shop exactly.

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Speaker 2: Grace is on the shops. Get investing, not financial advice.

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Speaker 2: But I yeah, I've been. I've been all over the trinkets.

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Speaker 2: It's basically because we're so close now, I feel like

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Speaker 2: I can actually start to buy the little things. I

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Speaker 2: mostly want to save the little things for when you're

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Speaker 2: in and you're like, oh, I could use something for

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Speaker 2: that corner. But the things I've been going for a

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Speaker 2: generally like art, little like bookends, vintagey things I'm finding little.

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Speaker 2: I got a label, a vintage label for like the

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Speaker 2: laundry room door cute, which I liked. So you had

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Speaker 2: just a hell of a lot of little trinkets.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, And are you so excitedly every time a package

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Speaker 1: comes or you at this stage where like you don't

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Speaker 1: know what it's going to be.

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Speaker 2: Well, I've ordered them to the house and I'm not

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Speaker 2: currently in the house. So it's Christmas next Wednesday? Can okay?

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Speaker 2: Last sunset you saw?

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Speaker 1: Oh sunset?

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Speaker 2: I went on a little girl's trip a few weeks ago,

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Speaker 2: my girl's trip baby moon, we shall call it.

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Speaker 1: It's not actually it was for everyone, but that's how

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Speaker 1: I was taking, I mean, last girl's trip before popping

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Speaker 1: out a baby.

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Speaker 2: And we saw some beautiful sunsets there and it was

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Speaker 2: just so lovely. It was kind of we were in

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Speaker 2: this gorgeous village where you just walk down and you

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Speaker 2: just sit at a restaurant. You order some calamari, you

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Speaker 2: get everyone gets an approsperits apart from me. You just

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Speaker 2: have a nice little chat and like a game of

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Speaker 2: cards while the sun is setting, and that is just.

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Speaker 1: That was God's plan for us all along. Were you

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Speaker 1: in Greece? Yes, Oh delightful. Yeah. What would your friend say?

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Speaker 1: Is your most annoying habit? Oh? Where do I start? Uh?

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Speaker 2: Very bad at going with the flow? Me and the

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Speaker 2: flow m hmm. Not good friends. Which is great because

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Speaker 2: it does mean for every trip or whatever, like you know,

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Speaker 2: they're like, oh, trip made out of the group chat.

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Speaker 2: If I'm in the group chat. If you think this

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Speaker 2: isn't making out of the group chat, you are very

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Speaker 2: much mistaken, first of all. Second of all, the unfortunately

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Speaker 2: will be run as a military operation. So yeah, depends

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Speaker 2: how much you like that. Like great because you can,

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Speaker 2: I guess put your feet up. But you never know

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Speaker 2: what's going to happen when you open your what's up?

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Speaker 2: There might be twenty poles, there might be a spreadsheet,

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Speaker 2: There might be a little tick box you have to

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Speaker 2: fill in. There might be a Google doc. It's too much.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. Wait, when you and your husband go on trips,

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Speaker 1: do you plan them? No? See this, I know, I

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Speaker 1: love it all I know guys, sorry to post, but

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Speaker 1: I one of my favorite things about my relationship is

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Speaker 1: that in the big wide world.

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Speaker 2: I am like, you know, I'm feisty. I'm running around

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Speaker 2: doing all my independent things. When I'm at home, I

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Speaker 2: am baby. When I am in that relationship, I am

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Speaker 2: I baby. Yeah, I baby, no do things? Baby, feet up,

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Speaker 2: baby tommy tickles baby, baby, get fed, free time, baby.

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Speaker 1: Baby, get fed well.

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Speaker 2: Baby, don't know what airport going from, what terminal, what

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Speaker 2: time plane? And that as someone who is like so

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Speaker 2: aggressively type A and organizes every single other thing in

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Speaker 2: their life like that is I never thought I could

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Speaker 2: have that from relationship because I did kind of come

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Speaker 2: to terms with the fact that I was like, this

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Speaker 2: is just who I am. I can't expect anyone else

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Speaker 2: to have such high standards of organization because obviously you're

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Speaker 2: taking it too far.

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Speaker 1: But lo and behold, here he came. But here he came.

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Speaker 1: There he was flying around the corner. And now I

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Speaker 1: get to be baby. Yeah the best. Okay, two more

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Speaker 1: texting or voice notes. I'm big on voice notes. I

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Speaker 1: just think there has to be a regular cadence of them,

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Speaker 1: and I think that I don't know, I think they

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Speaker 1: need to solve, like to serve a purpose.

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Speaker 2: So, for example, if you're going quickly back and forth

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Speaker 2: in the workday. Is it helpful to have a voice note? No, like,

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Speaker 2: because I'm in a meeting.

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Speaker 1: You've made it very hard for me to go to

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Speaker 1: listen to the meaning exactly and that I can't do that. Okay.

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Speaker 2: And a book you think everybody should read, which, okay,

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Speaker 2: we were just going through some of some of the

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Speaker 2: best books. I'm having a really good reading year, and

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Speaker 2: I think it's only going to go from strength to

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Speaker 2: strength if I'm able to read in a maternity leave,

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Speaker 2: which my kindles a good old one handhold. So I'm,

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Speaker 2: you know, hoping. I just read Broken Country, which, oh

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Speaker 2: my god, was so good. I honestly so. I was

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Speaker 2: on my actual babymon as you can tell, I had

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Speaker 2: to have model the friend's baby moon and husband one's

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Speaker 2: the solo one happening. Well, yeah, this is it. It's

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Speaker 2: right here. It was my trip to this American and yeah, honestly,

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Speaker 2: I just did not move all day. I was completely transfixed.

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Speaker 2: It was so well written. I have quite a strict

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Speaker 2: over four rule on Goodreads. Not because I'm a snob,

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Speaker 2: although you could argue, but because there are so many

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Speaker 2: books out there that if I'm busy, the chances of me,

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Speaker 2: like if I can just heighten the chance of me

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Speaker 2: enjoying the book by it being above a four, because

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Speaker 2: I think what I used to fall into the trap

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Speaker 2: of a lot is that these really over hyped books,

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Speaker 2: they still won't be an over a four if they

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Speaker 2: are badly written. Like I am so sorry to everyone,

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Speaker 2: but like I really am not a Colleen Hoover fan,

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Speaker 2: and most of them are not over a four on

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Speaker 2: good Reads and they're in lies the lesson, and I, yeah,

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Speaker 2: so I generally just go for above a four and

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Speaker 2: I have my whole want to read list, and then

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Speaker 2: I can just filter it by the average rating.

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Speaker 1: This is a mathematical affair. Yeah, I don't know why

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Speaker 1: I've taken your.

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Speaker 2: Your quick fire questions so aggressively try to expand them

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Speaker 2: into the entire podcast, But yeah, sorry for taking it

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Speaker 2: so far.

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Speaker 1: That's all right, you know what, I feel like we're

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Speaker 1: warmed up now though we know a bit more about

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Speaker 1: each other. We kind of already did, but you know,

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Speaker 1: the audience does. Let's talk about what you're here to

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Speaker 1: talk about, which is business in life and work. When

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Speaker 1: did you first start putting yourself out there online? Because

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Speaker 1: that's kind of the beginning of this whole story, isn't it.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it absolutely is. And I think like one of

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Speaker 2: the maybe one of the misconceptions people get about my

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Speaker 2: story is because it all started so long ago online,

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Speaker 2: I think the assumption is that like the following was

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Speaker 2: built first and then it was like, oh, let's throw

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Speaker 2: businesses on top, which totally fair. Some of them were

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Speaker 2: because I obviously didn't start a fought businesses at once.

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Speaker 2: That would be absolutely saying. And I am a little

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Speaker 2: but like not that far, not that fast. And I

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Speaker 2: started my first business in my first year at university. Well,

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Speaker 2: actually I sold my first products online within kind of

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Speaker 2: six months of starting my socials, and they had just

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Speaker 2: been started as like an anonymous account where I was

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Speaker 2: just posting about like my fitness journey. So I was

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Speaker 2: interested in staying disciplined and going to the gym, and

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Speaker 2: that was not something that I had within my wheelhouse.

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Speaker 2: It just wasn't something that I was capable of doing.

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Speaker 2: And so I started the account as an I guess

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Speaker 2: like an accountability thing while I was in my last

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Speaker 2: year of sixth form. I don't know what you were

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Speaker 2: just like the ast year of like, yeah, it's high school,

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Speaker 2: but not if you like it's the two years after

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Speaker 2: if you left at sixteen, so like the eighteen one,

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Speaker 2: and I, yeah, I just started up the account. As

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Speaker 2: I said, it was anonymous, I didn't show my face.

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Speaker 2: All of that started, and then started selling products on

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Speaker 2: there a few months later. And then by the time

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Speaker 2: I actually went to start what I consider now like

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Speaker 2: my first business, I it was about a year later,

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Speaker 2: and I guess I just had like a year experimenting

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Speaker 2: with the because the first products I sold were digital

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Speaker 2: ebugs and or just ebogs, and essentially I guess i'd

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Speaker 2: kind of played around with that that year, being like, oh, okay,

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Speaker 2: well if I put it twenty percent off or like

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Speaker 2: a flash sale, then more people come in, or I

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Speaker 2: put it like a bundle deal, then people buy, you know,

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Speaker 2: people are more likely to buy two than one, or

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Speaker 2: like you know, you do a limited thing whatever. So

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Speaker 2: I kind of like come to terms with how some

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Speaker 2: of these things work. And so then by the time

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Speaker 2: I started the business like a year later, I kind

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Speaker 2: of realized that that was a viable option. And by

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Speaker 2: that point I'd gone from having like one or two

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Speaker 2: thousand followers to having.

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Speaker 1: I think around one hundred thousand. Yeah, and so that's

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Speaker 1: when I started that. Okay, this brings me to some

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Speaker 1: follow up questions. Did you show your face first or

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Speaker 1: did somebody realize it was you? Oh?

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Speaker 2: They realized it was it, Like which is so I

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Speaker 2: kind of showed my face out of like.

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Speaker 1: Well here I am. There we go games up and

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Speaker 1: who was it? Do you remember? Oh?

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Speaker 2: There was a lot of chat school. And I think

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Speaker 2: also because I was so I'd only joined that school

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Speaker 2: a year before, so I wasn't It was a school

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Speaker 2: obviously like with high school, like people had been there

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Speaker 2: since they were like eleven. I had not, and so

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Speaker 2: I was already kind of like new girly and then

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Speaker 2: just yeah, word got around and I remember coming back

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Speaker 2: to school after because it was like after the Easter

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Speaker 2: holidays and I'd been like, you know, doing my posting

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Speaker 2: and all of this, and then I just remember coming

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Speaker 2: back in and being like, I hear whispers.

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Speaker 1: It's a gossip girl, the gossip girl real life, And

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Speaker 1: it was very like what the fuck?

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Speaker 2: Because I think that now, even at the time, people

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Speaker 2: not everyone had personal Instagrams, Like it wasn't really like

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Speaker 2: we were on Facebook, Like people didn't have personal well

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Speaker 2: a few people did, but it wasn't like like you'd

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Speaker 2: be posting the toast you just buttered, like it wouldn't

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Speaker 2: be like a filter. Yeah, like it's been unlikely to

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Speaker 2: even be a selfie like car and pull yourself together,

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Speaker 2: whereas there was me like don't want.

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Speaker 1: To them NYM today, here's the salon you know. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so it just wasn't wasn't that well regarded. I would

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Speaker 1: say that sucks, But you made I feel like you've

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Speaker 1: got the opportunity to basically have like a playground to

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Speaker 1: understand business on your own.

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Speaker 2: One hundred percent at very low risk as well. I

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Speaker 2: always I think that there's like a lot of narrative

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Speaker 2: on mine around like take the leap, quit your job,

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Speaker 2: do this, And it's like I was very fortunate to

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Speaker 2: be in the position where I never needed to do

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Speaker 2: that because a I started with digital products which have

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Speaker 2: basically zero sum cost, like you don't really need to

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Speaker 2: pay a lot to get into them. You just need

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Speaker 2: to do the work on it. And like I paid

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Speaker 2: fifty quid to a friend who is a graphic design

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Speaker 2: student to like make them look nice before Canvra before

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Speaker 2: Canva pre pre Canvra in the World PC And essentially

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Speaker 2: that was yeah, because I was like, it's an EE book,

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Speaker 2: it needs to look nice. But other than that, like

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Speaker 2: there's no marginal cost. So if two people bought it,

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Speaker 2: it's cost me the same to produce as like one.

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Speaker 2: So like every extra thing you sell is just cash.

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Speaker 2: And so yeah, it was like I never needed. And

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Speaker 2: then also I went on to university. Like I've never

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Speaker 2: been full time. There was never a moment where I

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Speaker 2: had to be like full time in the business before

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Speaker 2: they'd actually you know, I then had three years of

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Speaker 2: university to really like work it out.

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Speaker 1: Yeah that's crazy. And you went and studied music, yeah,

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Speaker 1: which I think a lot of people may not know maybe,

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Speaker 1: And what was was it? I was like I was

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Speaker 1: doing some digging on the Wikipedia. I was like, this

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Speaker 1: is sualism today. I hope you did the nice donation

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Speaker 1: link to Wikipedia. Yeah. I always do. I always. They're

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Speaker 1: always like we're begging you. Yeah, she will like like

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Speaker 1: donate true cents. I'm like, oh, be rute not to

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Speaker 1: I always do it. But what do you think about

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Speaker 1: studying music and like the arts helped you with business? Oh,

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Speaker 1: I don't know if that much. I think that the

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Speaker 1: main Okay, main things I think I really learned from

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Speaker 1: the like music background.

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Speaker 2: Worth saying as well, that my degree was specific. It

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Speaker 2: was all lessa based, so it wasn't actually like performance.

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Speaker 1: I imagine you having to sing like for your own nerves. Okay,

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Speaker 1: and that's a name, but no it was. It was

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Speaker 1: so it was like the areas I specialized in were

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Speaker 1: like politics and philosophy of music, so music so like

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Speaker 1: during censorship eras or whatever. I anyway, so I think

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Speaker 1: that the two main things that it taught.

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Speaker 2: Me were one, it was a very because of the

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Speaker 2: university I went to, it was a very high workload course.

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Speaker 2: So essentially it was I had like ten thousand words

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Speaker 2: a week for three years, and then none of that counted. Well,

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Speaker 2: it counted in that if you didn't do it, you

329
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Speaker 2: were getting kicked out, but it didn't count towards your

330
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Speaker 2: grade until the last month. Yeah, and you were consistently examined,

331
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Speaker 2: but not for but for like your place rather than

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Speaker 2: not even exactly. And so then it's all like culminates

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Speaker 2: in this big horror. And then the other thing I

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00:17:49,400 --> 00:17:52,040
Speaker 2: think that music and that musical background I guess really

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Speaker 2: taught me was like I think you face so much

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Speaker 2: rejection doing music and the arts generally, there will always

337
00:18:01,200 --> 00:18:03,560
Speaker 2: be people who are far better than you, like always,

338
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Speaker 2: and you have to work so hard and put in

339
00:18:05,920 --> 00:18:07,960
Speaker 2: so many extra hours and it's not very well. It

340
00:18:08,000 --> 00:18:11,399
Speaker 2: definitely wasn't where I was like considered like cool or

341
00:18:11,480 --> 00:18:14,320
Speaker 2: prestigious or reputable or like whatever it might be. And

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00:18:14,760 --> 00:18:16,200
Speaker 2: you did that at the same time, and I had

343
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Speaker 2: to spend so many hours outside of school and university

344
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Speaker 2: like doing the extra and then you were just constantly

345
00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:26,800
Speaker 2: shut down, shut down, like the entire time. So it

346
00:18:26,920 --> 00:18:28,919
Speaker 2: teaches you to have a very good relationship with rejection

347
00:18:28,960 --> 00:18:33,240
Speaker 2: because literally just constantly like I don't remember, like this

348
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Speaker 2: is norm due to be a soul story, but like

349
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Speaker 2: as in like I don't remember a single time when like,

350
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Speaker 2: well there are probably like two three times total where

351
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Speaker 2: I went for something and actually got it and it was,

352
00:18:44,600 --> 00:18:46,080
Speaker 2: you know, the thing I'd really worked for most of

353
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Speaker 2: the rest of the time, Like you do a fuck

354
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Speaker 2: load and my lad sweat, Yeah, well, thank.

355
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:52,760
Speaker 1: You very much. Exactly.

356
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Speaker 2: I'm really good at those like essentially where you do

357
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:59,000
Speaker 2: a fuckload of work and then you don't get anything

358
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Speaker 2: for it, and in fact you're kind of shut down

359
00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,440
Speaker 2: and they're like, you know, the rest of your life,

360
00:19:02,440 --> 00:19:03,800
Speaker 2: they're not going to be like, oh, you're really bad

361
00:19:03,840 --> 00:19:06,560
Speaker 2: at this, but like you're kind of being consistently told

362
00:19:06,600 --> 00:19:08,280
Speaker 2: like other people are better than you. And I think

363
00:19:08,320 --> 00:19:13,000
Speaker 2: because I did that from so early, Like I worked

364
00:19:13,080 --> 00:19:15,400
Speaker 2: like a theedral from when I was eight, which essentially

365
00:19:15,440 --> 00:19:18,240
Speaker 2: was like like twenty or so hours on top of

366
00:19:18,520 --> 00:19:22,040
Speaker 2: schoolwork every week of music, and then like from that

367
00:19:22,040 --> 00:19:24,960
Speaker 2: point onwards, it's like it's actually just like a I

368
00:19:25,040 --> 00:19:26,480
Speaker 2: think the main thing it taught me is just like

369
00:19:26,560 --> 00:19:30,520
Speaker 2: a crash course in being happy with rejection or just

370
00:19:30,520 --> 00:19:33,080
Speaker 2: like being okay and being able to work really really

371
00:19:33,119 --> 00:19:35,919
Speaker 2: hard and then get just be shut down over and

372
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Speaker 2: over and.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, which is huge in business and huge in entertainment one.

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Speaker 2: Hundred percent, and just like I think, a very good

375
00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:43,960
Speaker 2: life skill, like you have a we see all of that,

376
00:19:44,119 --> 00:19:48,240
Speaker 2: you know, TikTok stuff for example on like rejection exposure therapy,

377
00:19:48,600 --> 00:19:52,080
Speaker 2: and I I think actually I saw it a lot,

378
00:19:52,119 --> 00:19:55,600
Speaker 2: like I wait, you come across people who maybe haven't

379
00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,919
Speaker 2: had as much rejection, and therefore the rejection they do

380
00:19:58,000 --> 00:20:01,320
Speaker 2: have really really shut them down. It's totally natural reaction

381
00:20:01,440 --> 00:20:07,240
Speaker 2: but actually if you're consistently like even now, there have

382
00:20:07,280 --> 00:20:11,120
Speaker 2: been so many things that I mean, you know, obviously

383
00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:13,040
Speaker 2: it wouldn't be public, but like so many things that

384
00:20:13,920 --> 00:20:16,720
Speaker 2: I've interviewed for or tried out for, like whatever it

385
00:20:16,800 --> 00:20:19,000
Speaker 2: might be that I would really want, and it's like

386
00:20:19,080 --> 00:20:21,160
Speaker 2: if it just comes through and it's a rejection, it's.

387
00:20:20,960 --> 00:20:24,680
Speaker 1: Like cool, yeah, yeah, next, yeah, exactly. I've been doing

388
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:28,639
Speaker 1: this recently where I've been like emailing, emailing guess that

389
00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:33,680
Speaker 1: I really want and they are ridiculous. Guess ridiculous. Otherwise

390
00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:37,160
Speaker 1: the answer is no, yeah, let's go exactly, you don't

391
00:20:37,200 --> 00:20:39,159
Speaker 1: take And I will say the other week, I was

392
00:20:39,200 --> 00:20:44,320
Speaker 1: like smobiles assistant said no, and she actually emailed me back,

393
00:20:44,320 --> 00:20:46,199
Speaker 1: and I was like that's a win. Yeah, it was

394
00:20:46,200 --> 00:20:48,440
Speaker 1: like an email back was a win. And I genuinely

395
00:20:48,560 --> 00:20:50,960
Speaker 1: was like throughout all this rejection, like the fact that

396
00:20:51,000 --> 00:20:53,800
Speaker 1: I've gotten through in somebody's evening. Maybe my favorite is

397
00:20:53,840 --> 00:20:56,000
Speaker 1: when they come back with something that like it's actually

398
00:20:56,119 --> 00:20:59,280
Speaker 1: unnecessary color on top of the rejection, it's like, oh, yeah,

399
00:20:59,320 --> 00:21:01,120
Speaker 1: we really don't like this type of thing. We don't.

400
00:21:01,520 --> 00:21:04,640
Speaker 1: They're like, oh, okay, but we're not prioritizing this kind

401
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:08,000
Speaker 1: of exposure and not well, actually, we just don't like

402
00:21:08,400 --> 00:21:12,080
Speaker 1: you at all. She's actually got really not certain baths,

403
00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:16,280
Speaker 1: but like she actually really terrible experience. Yeah exactly, and yeah,

404
00:21:16,480 --> 00:21:18,120
Speaker 1: but it was really nic They sent me this lovely man.

405
00:21:18,200 --> 00:21:20,760
Speaker 1: I was like, that is the biggest win. A direct

406
00:21:20,800 --> 00:21:22,080
Speaker 1: no was the biggest win. And I was like the

407
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:23,399
Speaker 1: hundred set of my character.

408
00:21:23,520 --> 00:21:26,200
Speaker 2: And I think that, like for anyone who maybe knows

409
00:21:26,240 --> 00:21:28,960
Speaker 2: that that is an area that they haven't got enough

410
00:21:28,960 --> 00:21:33,399
Speaker 2: exposure to, like purposefully putting yourself in that track, I

411
00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:35,399
Speaker 2: think is one of the best things you can do

412
00:21:35,440 --> 00:21:37,920
Speaker 2: because until you're used to rejection, you're going to continuously,

413
00:21:38,240 --> 00:21:40,679
Speaker 2: continuously be scared of it and also probably have an

414
00:21:40,720 --> 00:21:42,920
Speaker 2: underlying fear of even going for things where you think

415
00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:46,119
Speaker 2: you might be rejected. Whereas like we know that like

416
00:21:46,560 --> 00:21:48,800
Speaker 2: the surface area of luck thing, for example, is all

417
00:21:48,840 --> 00:21:53,320
Speaker 2: around like putting yourself in positions where you could get lucky,

418
00:21:53,680 --> 00:21:58,399
Speaker 2: like not that way but what you've got, but like

419
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:01,800
Speaker 2: essentially where like we've said it, like you miss one

420
00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:03,280
Speaker 2: hundred percent of the shots you don't take, So if

421
00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:05,479
Speaker 2: you're not putting yourself in those environments, you don't know

422
00:22:05,520 --> 00:22:09,120
Speaker 2: whether Yeah, they wanted these someone with these ten qualifications

423
00:22:09,119 --> 00:22:10,960
Speaker 2: and you only have three. But actually they decided you

424
00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:12,959
Speaker 2: were better at these other things. And like, you never

425
00:22:12,960 --> 00:22:14,440
Speaker 2: would have known if you hadn't put yourself there. And

426
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:17,000
Speaker 2: if you're scared of rejection, that's going to be very hard.

427
00:22:17,160 --> 00:22:25,240
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a huge thing to learn speaking of something

428
00:22:25,240 --> 00:22:27,359
Speaker 1: that wasn't a rejection maybe, but I think was a

429
00:22:27,400 --> 00:22:30,320
Speaker 1: great success. When did you get the idea for Tala

430
00:22:31,200 --> 00:22:33,199
Speaker 1: and where did the name come from? Oh?

431
00:22:33,280 --> 00:22:35,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, I can tell you. It was a very boring Sorry, sorry,

432
00:22:35,760 --> 00:22:36,080
Speaker 2: I'll try.

433
00:22:36,119 --> 00:22:37,359
Speaker 1: It was roll it out, let's go.

434
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:40,879
Speaker 2: So yeah, I started Tyler in my final year at university.

435
00:22:40,880 --> 00:22:43,639
Speaker 2: Actually before that, like the month before that month I

436
00:22:43,680 --> 00:22:48,000
Speaker 2: told you about where everything counts towards your degree.

437
00:22:48,040 --> 00:22:50,640
Speaker 1: So that was really smart. Wag did you do that well?

438
00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:54,760
Speaker 2: Because I was meant to exactly I love it except breaking. No,

439
00:22:54,840 --> 00:22:58,360
Speaker 2: it was meant to essentially launch a good while before then.

440
00:22:58,440 --> 00:23:00,000
Speaker 2: It just kept getting pushed for a number of tif

441
00:23:00,080 --> 00:23:03,000
Speaker 2: reasons like manufacturing delays, a number of these different things,

442
00:23:03,240 --> 00:23:04,320
Speaker 2: and then I was just like, we just have to

443
00:23:04,359 --> 00:23:06,240
Speaker 2: get it out because I'm paying people and we just

444
00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:08,800
Speaker 2: we need to launch basically, and it just happened to

445
00:23:08,800 --> 00:23:11,440
Speaker 2: fall at the worst possible time. But rewinding back, I

446
00:23:11,840 --> 00:23:14,120
Speaker 2: got the idea for the business about a year before.

447
00:23:14,760 --> 00:23:17,439
Speaker 2: I guess like I was very much like within the space,

448
00:23:17,600 --> 00:23:19,959
Speaker 2: like I was wearing a lot of active where I was,

449
00:23:20,440 --> 00:23:22,240
Speaker 2: I was a student and I went to the gym,

450
00:23:22,280 --> 00:23:24,359
Speaker 2: so like, obviously I was wearing active most of the time,

451
00:23:25,160 --> 00:23:28,320
Speaker 2: and I had really strong opinions on like how things

452
00:23:28,359 --> 00:23:31,639
Speaker 2: fit and how things felt. And I felt like a

453
00:23:31,680 --> 00:23:35,720
Speaker 2: lot of I felt like a lot of designs within

454
00:23:35,760 --> 00:23:39,000
Speaker 2: the industry were either like super revealing, which actually I

455
00:23:39,040 --> 00:23:41,800
Speaker 2: don't find that flattering on me. We do, you know, gorgeous,

456
00:23:41,840 --> 00:23:44,240
Speaker 2: like strappy bras and like all of that, and they

457
00:23:44,240 --> 00:23:47,639
Speaker 2: look amazing, but I think that, like I, it felt

458
00:23:47,640 --> 00:23:49,720
Speaker 2: like it either needed to be teeny tiny or it

459
00:23:49,760 --> 00:23:51,840
Speaker 2: needed to be kind of frumpy, and I wasn't. I

460
00:23:51,880 --> 00:23:54,960
Speaker 2: was like, actually, that's not where I like to kind

461
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:56,640
Speaker 2: of sit in terms of the designs I go for.

462
00:23:57,200 --> 00:23:59,800
Speaker 2: But also one of the main things was that I'd

463
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:02,280
Speaker 2: moved away from fast fashion consumption in my day to

464
00:24:02,320 --> 00:24:05,240
Speaker 2: day life, so I just wasn't. I wasn't, Like, I

465
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:08,199
Speaker 2: don't know, I used to terrible, but I used to

466
00:24:08,240 --> 00:24:11,720
Speaker 2: like have contracts with like PLT and a number of

467
00:24:11,760 --> 00:24:13,600
Speaker 2: different fast fashion houses and all of that. Like with

468
00:24:13,640 --> 00:24:16,800
Speaker 2: my with fast fashion houses was really like blowing them

469
00:24:16,880 --> 00:24:18,680
Speaker 2: up in the Alvy Mate like direction.

470
00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:25,920
Speaker 1: But yeah, and they ran exactly but I had essentially

471
00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:27,680
Speaker 1: had contracts with them, and that was a big part

472
00:24:27,680 --> 00:24:28,399
Speaker 1: of my job.

473
00:24:28,680 --> 00:24:32,119
Speaker 2: And I literally stopped that overnight, Like I canceled all

474
00:24:32,160 --> 00:24:34,560
Speaker 2: my contracts. I lost like seventy five percent of my

475
00:24:34,640 --> 00:24:36,640
Speaker 2: income because I was just like, this is not something

476
00:24:36,680 --> 00:24:38,240
Speaker 2: I want to stand by. I really don't like it.

477
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:41,040
Speaker 2: I feel shit every time I post about it. Yeah,

478
00:24:41,119 --> 00:24:42,480
Speaker 2: and then I kind of moved away from it in

479
00:24:42,480 --> 00:24:46,119
Speaker 2: my day to day like actual consumption, and I just

480
00:24:46,160 --> 00:24:48,600
Speaker 2: realized that active where was like a glaringly big gap

481
00:24:48,640 --> 00:24:50,240
Speaker 2: in that way because you don't because you think of

482
00:24:50,320 --> 00:24:52,800
Speaker 2: it as like a necessity for the thing you're doing,

483
00:24:53,240 --> 00:24:55,840
Speaker 2: you kind of look less at it, being like a

484
00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:58,480
Speaker 2: cherry on top, and therefore you're like, oh, I'm not

485
00:24:58,520 --> 00:25:01,200
Speaker 2: really thinking about the material or who's made it or

486
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:05,920
Speaker 2: any of that. And so I had kind of realized

487
00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:07,240
Speaker 2: that I'd moved away from that in my day to

488
00:25:07,280 --> 00:25:09,159
Speaker 2: day but not necessarily my active wear. And then the

489
00:25:09,160 --> 00:25:11,400
Speaker 2: biggest solutions that I was finding from my day to day,

490
00:25:11,440 --> 00:25:15,280
Speaker 2: which were things like rental and pre owned and like

491
00:25:15,359 --> 00:25:16,479
Speaker 2: amazing ethical brands.

492
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:19,880
Speaker 1: All of this were either not really.

493
00:25:19,720 --> 00:25:22,399
Speaker 2: Available in active wear for reasons like pre owned and

494
00:25:22,440 --> 00:25:26,080
Speaker 2: rental people aren't as keen on for active Well, yeah

495
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:29,359
Speaker 2: they do exist, but like, yeah, you know stuff probably

496
00:25:29,560 --> 00:25:31,520
Speaker 2: well you probably had like that's the thing, Like there

497
00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:33,720
Speaker 2: are solutions for it, but it's probably not going to

498
00:25:33,720 --> 00:25:35,120
Speaker 2: reach a mass market change level.

499
00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:35,520
Speaker 1: No.

500
00:25:35,920 --> 00:25:39,119
Speaker 2: And then also with the ethical brands, there were some

501
00:25:39,200 --> 00:25:41,240
Speaker 2: brands that had done some really amazing things, but again

502
00:25:41,280 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 2: they were like they were probably about fifty percent more

503
00:25:43,880 --> 00:25:48,359
Speaker 2: price wise, and so I wanted to look into creating

504
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:52,119
Speaker 2: an option that was granted, like not about being small

505
00:25:52,119 --> 00:25:55,879
Speaker 2: and artisanal. It was kind of can we do better

506
00:25:56,080 --> 00:26:01,520
Speaker 2: at scale? So like, can we have some baseline assumptions

507
00:26:01,560 --> 00:26:03,639
Speaker 2: in terms of like what we are and aren't going

508
00:26:03,680 --> 00:26:05,680
Speaker 2: to do in terms of fabrics, in terms of factories,

509
00:26:05,720 --> 00:26:08,000
Speaker 2: in terms of dyeing processes, in terms of sampling, in

510
00:26:08,080 --> 00:26:10,239
Speaker 2: terms of packaging, in terms of all of these different things,

511
00:26:10,280 --> 00:26:13,720
Speaker 2: because I think people think of you know, those types

512
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:16,080
Speaker 2: of things in terms of just materials, whereas it's actually

513
00:26:16,119 --> 00:26:18,560
Speaker 2: so much more behind the scenes, like zero percent to

514
00:26:18,600 --> 00:26:22,600
Speaker 2: landfill pledges, not restocking during sales and therefore just you know,

515
00:26:22,680 --> 00:26:25,080
Speaker 2: trying to sell loads and loads of stuff at sale

516
00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:27,479
Speaker 2: prece like all of that, and so we kind of

517
00:26:27,880 --> 00:26:30,399
Speaker 2: I wanted to create an active where brand that ticked

518
00:26:30,840 --> 00:26:34,679
Speaker 2: those boxes and also was like you wouldn't see a

519
00:26:34,680 --> 00:26:36,960
Speaker 2: difference in terms of like fit. Yeah, and it wasn't

520
00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:39,600
Speaker 2: fifty percent more expensive. So it took a long time

521
00:26:39,920 --> 00:26:42,199
Speaker 2: because that's quite hard. And I think that you know,

522
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:44,000
Speaker 2: there are a lot of our ideals around what you

523
00:26:44,000 --> 00:26:46,760
Speaker 2: would want from lots of brands you shop from. I

524
00:26:46,840 --> 00:26:48,639
Speaker 2: think realistically a lot of the time they haven't been

525
00:26:48,640 --> 00:26:52,760
Speaker 2: done for a reason because it's like not maintainable. But

526
00:26:53,680 --> 00:26:57,080
Speaker 2: we yeah, I kind of got to starting that about

527
00:26:57,080 --> 00:26:59,879
Speaker 2: a year before it ended up launching, and then launched that,

528
00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:06,520
Speaker 2: as I said, in May of twenty nineteen, and now

529
00:27:06,720 --> 00:27:10,840
Speaker 2: now seven years later, crazy and she's thriving.

530
00:27:11,040 --> 00:27:13,360
Speaker 1: She is driving. I was there the other day. Oh yeah,

531
00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:16,400
Speaker 1: when you're in Australia. I sent you a message. Oh yeah, yeah,

532
00:27:16,440 --> 00:27:18,720
Speaker 1: it was like checking up on your first baby. Well

533
00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:21,200
Speaker 1: thenk you they was either us talk members are really nice,

534
00:27:21,280 --> 00:27:23,280
Speaker 1: everyone's love. Yeah, she was I'm going to give her

535
00:27:23,280 --> 00:27:25,119
Speaker 1: a shout out. She had read hair. That's what I remember.

536
00:27:25,600 --> 00:27:27,919
Speaker 1: Was it at the Carnaby Street store or the Westfield one,

537
00:27:28,080 --> 00:27:30,840
Speaker 1: the one in Carnoby Street. She was delight there you go.

538
00:27:30,960 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 2: Everyone's amazing. Yeah, I think so again. I mean, like

539
00:27:34,480 --> 00:27:38,640
Speaker 2: it obviously separate, but like we with the store expansion,

540
00:27:38,680 --> 00:27:42,199
Speaker 2: for example, it was like, how do we create an

541
00:27:42,240 --> 00:27:46,080
Speaker 2: in person environment that reflects are online and kind of

542
00:27:46,080 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 2: like who we are in HQ and all of that

543
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:50,280
Speaker 2: like really feels in that way. Rather than just being like, yeah,

544
00:27:50,320 --> 00:27:53,400
Speaker 2: we'll just hire these people in as quickly as possible.

545
00:27:53,440 --> 00:27:56,080
Speaker 2: It was like, no, it's like we're like a you know, we're.

546
00:27:55,960 --> 00:27:59,240
Speaker 1: Like a Girl's Girl brand. We're like her. We know

547
00:27:59,320 --> 00:28:00,679
Speaker 1: how we want you to feel in the clothes, we

548
00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:02,280
Speaker 1: know how we want you to feel in the shop,

549
00:28:02,359 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 1: so like we've got to represent that in the physical space.

550
00:28:04,840 --> 00:28:07,119
Speaker 1: The other thing I liked about the Tower store and

551
00:28:07,119 --> 00:28:10,760
Speaker 1: then one move on to a whole podcast on this,

552
00:28:11,160 --> 00:28:13,840
Speaker 1: I really liked that, like you guys had all the

553
00:28:13,880 --> 00:28:17,280
Speaker 1: sizes out mm hmm. I was like, oh, thank god. Yeah,

554
00:28:17,280 --> 00:28:20,639
Speaker 1: because I'm a big conscious decision Oh great, I was like,

555
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:22,639
Speaker 1: this is amazing. Because I hate when you go to

556
00:28:22,680 --> 00:28:24,639
Speaker 1: a store it's like, so do you have what's the

557
00:28:24,680 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 1: biggest size you have? Yeah? Can you get it for me?

558
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:29,600
Speaker 1: And it's like it just kind of always sucks. Yeah,

559
00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:31,560
Speaker 1: they I don't know. It's not a good feeling.

560
00:28:31,640 --> 00:28:33,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course, And like you know, there've been lots

561
00:28:33,880 --> 00:28:39,240
Speaker 2: of I would say, like learning cubs because again it's

562
00:28:39,280 --> 00:28:42,000
Speaker 2: like you're you go from running like what's an online

563
00:28:42,000 --> 00:28:44,880
Speaker 2: store where everything is in one warehouse, it is getting

564
00:28:44,920 --> 00:28:47,160
Speaker 2: shipped out from one place, and so everything's in one

565
00:28:47,200 --> 00:28:50,280
Speaker 2: place to even like everything new you launch, needing it

566
00:28:50,320 --> 00:28:52,400
Speaker 2: to get to one store, but you also need like

567
00:28:52,680 --> 00:28:54,840
Speaker 2: the exact right size ratio you don't know who's going

568
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 2: to come in that day, and like knowing that you

569
00:28:56,640 --> 00:28:58,760
Speaker 2: need like you can estimate it, but like how many

570
00:28:58,800 --> 00:29:00,320
Speaker 2: of those pieces do you actually need in the store

571
00:29:00,360 --> 00:29:02,520
Speaker 2: across how many sizes, different colors, like all of this

572
00:29:02,720 --> 00:29:04,760
Speaker 2: like it's you know, I'm sure we won't have got

573
00:29:04,800 --> 00:29:07,320
Speaker 2: it right for everyone, but it's a it's been a

574
00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:09,880
Speaker 2: massive like learning curve, and I'm very proud of like

575
00:29:10,400 --> 00:29:13,600
Speaker 2: the reviews and kind of love we get from how

576
00:29:13,640 --> 00:29:15,480
Speaker 2: people feel.

577
00:29:15,760 --> 00:29:17,920
Speaker 1: Let's take it down. Let's take a turn for the worst. Yeah,

578
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:20,600
Speaker 1: it's no more compliments, no more good stuff you're doing

579
00:29:20,600 --> 00:29:25,240
Speaker 1: for the environment, women's stuff. Confidence. What's been the biggest

580
00:29:25,320 --> 00:29:29,640
Speaker 1: like oh fuck moment of running a business? Oh, there

581
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:34,960
Speaker 1: have been so many. They are every day, they are relentless. No,

582
00:29:35,080 --> 00:29:36,800
Speaker 1: I think, I mean, I actually do think that, like

583
00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:38,320
Speaker 1: that is one of the most defining parts of having

584
00:29:38,320 --> 00:29:41,880
Speaker 1: a business, is like you are constantly just like on

585
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:42,320
Speaker 1: the floor.

586
00:29:42,560 --> 00:29:44,680
Speaker 2: She just like why like more and more of this,

587
00:29:44,840 --> 00:29:47,440
Speaker 2: Like my propensity to deal with stress now I think

588
00:29:47,520 --> 00:29:50,760
Speaker 2: is so high actually for the bad reason of the

589
00:29:50,800 --> 00:29:54,240
Speaker 2: fact that like shit is thrown at me every single day,

590
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:58,840
Speaker 2: like big, big stuff, you know. And I think that's

591
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:00,320
Speaker 2: just part of having a business. And then you adding

592
00:30:00,360 --> 00:30:03,680
Speaker 2: more businesses, it's kind of like just increases the cadence

593
00:30:03,800 --> 00:30:07,520
Speaker 2: of these types of things coming up. There are many

594
00:30:07,520 --> 00:30:09,760
Speaker 2: different ones, Like there have been big o fuck ones,

595
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:14,480
Speaker 2: Like in like twenty twenty twenty twenty one, tla Very

596
00:30:14,680 --> 00:30:19,320
Speaker 2: nearly went bye bye, and that was like a good

597
00:30:20,440 --> 00:30:24,680
Speaker 2: year long battle like to and within that, like I

598
00:30:24,720 --> 00:30:26,200
Speaker 2: can't remember how long it would have been, but it

599
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 2: would have been like around two months of like working

600
00:30:29,600 --> 00:30:31,760
Speaker 2: out whether we're going to make payroll every single week

601
00:30:31,840 --> 00:30:32,400
Speaker 2: and being like.

602
00:30:32,440 --> 00:30:35,160
Speaker 1: Right, that would be the most stressful part I can oh, yeah,

603
00:30:35,240 --> 00:30:37,400
Speaker 1: like it's okay if I go bankrupt. Yeah.

604
00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:40,520
Speaker 2: Well I had times when I was literally like I

605
00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 2: would pay salaries out of like my Monzo account, like

606
00:30:43,360 --> 00:30:45,760
Speaker 2: as in like you know, I had like one payroll

607
00:30:45,800 --> 00:30:47,120
Speaker 2: that we weren't going to make and I was like

608
00:30:48,080 --> 00:30:50,920
Speaker 2: fuck And I sold my car the next day to

609
00:30:51,000 --> 00:30:53,120
Speaker 2: like someone I found online, which was literally like a

610
00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:55,240
Speaker 2: what was it? It was like a they'd come to

611
00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:56,400
Speaker 2: your house and they'd just buy a car a few

612
00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:57,360
Speaker 2: and it was like I don't even know if this

613
00:30:57,400 --> 00:30:59,080
Speaker 2: is but it was like, as so long as I

614
00:30:59,120 --> 00:31:02,760
Speaker 2: just want to make account before they leave, I was like, sounds.

615
00:31:02,680 --> 00:31:04,440
Speaker 1: Sounds like my solution for the week.

616
00:31:04,960 --> 00:31:09,200
Speaker 2: So yeah, there have been like big like big, terrible

617
00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:14,960
Speaker 2: like prolonged, very life ruining at the time kind of

618
00:31:16,280 --> 00:31:19,320
Speaker 2: things to go through, and then there were the small

619
00:31:19,320 --> 00:31:22,880
Speaker 2: ones every day like there's you know, the other day

620
00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:26,600
Speaker 2: we had our like we did like a hotel tala.

621
00:31:26,640 --> 00:31:27,400
Speaker 2: It was kind of like it.

622
00:31:27,400 --> 00:31:30,160
Speaker 1: I saw it was so beautiful, thank you. It was gorgeous,

623
00:31:30,200 --> 00:31:30,560
Speaker 1: thank you.

624
00:31:30,680 --> 00:31:33,000
Speaker 2: It was essentially like a campaign that we did, like

625
00:31:33,040 --> 00:31:34,600
Speaker 2: what Tala would be like as a hotel and then

626
00:31:34,640 --> 00:31:37,360
Speaker 2: hosted some people there. And you know, even on the

627
00:31:37,360 --> 00:31:40,280
Speaker 2: first day of that, like we sent two of our

628
00:31:40,360 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 2: team members early to set everything up with like all

629
00:31:43,240 --> 00:31:47,120
Speaker 2: of the stock and the decorations and like the cute

630
00:31:47,120 --> 00:31:51,040
Speaker 2: little touches and everything, and five out of ten suitcases

631
00:31:51,080 --> 00:31:54,239
Speaker 2: got lost and ended up like floating around Europe. And

632
00:31:54,280 --> 00:31:56,360
Speaker 2: like the whole reason you send people early is that

633
00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 2: they can like set things up.

634
00:31:58,640 --> 00:31:59,960
Speaker 1: It's just a little bit of chale.

635
00:32:00,280 --> 00:32:04,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, so you know, that type of stuff happens

636
00:32:04,040 --> 00:32:05,400
Speaker 2: all the time. Same with I went out to New

637
00:32:05,440 --> 00:32:07,040
Speaker 2: York Fashion Week. We were doing a New York Fashion

638
00:32:07,040 --> 00:32:09,960
Speaker 2: Week activation and I was there for forty eight hours

639
00:32:09,960 --> 00:32:13,960
Speaker 2: before I had to go somewhere else and I literally

640
00:32:14,240 --> 00:32:16,400
Speaker 2: landed and my one suitcase that I had with me

641
00:32:16,840 --> 00:32:18,080
Speaker 2: was lost and they were like, we can get it

642
00:32:18,080 --> 00:32:19,680
Speaker 2: back to you in forty eight hours, and I was like, perfect,

643
00:32:19,680 --> 00:32:24,400
Speaker 2: We've got our New York Fashion Week thing tomorrow, so

644
00:32:25,120 --> 00:32:26,160
Speaker 2: it should be sooner.

645
00:32:26,360 --> 00:32:31,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, have we considered teleporting? Yeah? Did they pay for that?

646
00:32:32,240 --> 00:32:34,080
Speaker 2: They don't think I ended up getting any compensation.

647
00:32:34,080 --> 00:32:36,560
Speaker 1: Oh, this is my this is a random hill I die.

648
00:32:36,760 --> 00:32:39,600
Speaker 1: But Airline compensation. I found a business on it though.

649
00:32:39,640 --> 00:32:42,280
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, I will always get a compensation from airlines. Really,

650
00:32:42,520 --> 00:32:42,800
Speaker 1: Oh I.

651
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:45,280
Speaker 2: See, I'm good at a stunny worded email around something

652
00:32:45,320 --> 00:32:45,680
Speaker 2: like that.

653
00:32:45,960 --> 00:32:49,720
Speaker 1: Oh no, I have beef with probably every airline. I'm

654
00:32:49,720 --> 00:32:52,040
Speaker 1: not going to go into them, but one, and they

655
00:32:52,080 --> 00:32:54,280
Speaker 1: spannsored the podcast and I love that's the only reason.

656
00:32:54,320 --> 00:32:56,760
Speaker 1: Oh my god. Really yeah, literally, I had anything Actually

657
00:32:57,200 --> 00:32:59,200
Speaker 1: i'll tell this story but I won't name names, but

658
00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:02,320
Speaker 1: an airline who I had like the most despicable experience

659
00:33:02,400 --> 00:33:05,920
Speaker 1: with with my dad randomly was like, we really wanted

660
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:07,400
Speaker 1: to one to the podcast and I was like no,

661
00:33:08,320 --> 00:33:11,760
Speaker 1: and my team was like, was like, you really should do.

662
00:33:11,840 --> 00:33:15,160
Speaker 1: I was like, I would never, I would never sell

663
00:33:15,280 --> 00:33:18,920
Speaker 1: my soul because I yeah anyways. Yeah.

664
00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:21,440
Speaker 2: Also, then when I flew to my next place, they

665
00:33:21,520 --> 00:33:23,600
Speaker 2: literally I was like, don't fly out to New York.

666
00:33:23,640 --> 00:33:25,160
Speaker 2: Keep it in London. I'll just get it when I'm

667
00:33:25,160 --> 00:33:26,440
Speaker 2: back in London because I only need it for the

668
00:33:26,520 --> 00:33:28,800
Speaker 2: next forty hours. And then literally as I flew off

669
00:33:28,840 --> 00:33:31,280
Speaker 2: to the next place, it flew from London to New York.

670
00:33:31,440 --> 00:33:34,080
Speaker 1: I was like, Okay, I know, and it's so hard

671
00:33:34,080 --> 00:33:36,600
Speaker 1: because it's like I also will say, I'm like every

672
00:33:36,600 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 1: single person who works for an airline, I'm like, I

673
00:33:38,480 --> 00:33:40,760
Speaker 1: love you. Oh yeah, I'm like you guys do that

674
00:33:40,960 --> 00:33:43,320
Speaker 1: probably a very hard job of like the only time

675
00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:45,320
Speaker 1: people want to talk to you is when they're really mad.

676
00:33:45,800 --> 00:33:47,680
Speaker 1: So it's always being but it's stuff like that where

677
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:49,880
Speaker 1: it's like the coordination, where it's like their policies and

678
00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:53,600
Speaker 1: it's like this policy just fuck need to We'll move

679
00:33:53,600 --> 00:33:58,560
Speaker 1: on from airline politics. That was my favorite favorite publical question. Yeah,

680
00:33:58,800 --> 00:34:00,440
Speaker 1: we can go on for ages. That's to be out

681
00:34:00,480 --> 00:34:08,640
Speaker 1: part two episodes. Come back for the part two. You

682
00:34:08,640 --> 00:34:11,560
Speaker 1: have such a natural talent for business. Have you ever

683
00:34:11,600 --> 00:34:14,160
Speaker 1: been like, I'm done with that and what do you

684
00:34:14,200 --> 00:34:15,560
Speaker 1: think you do instead? Oh?

685
00:34:16,360 --> 00:34:18,640
Speaker 2: So, I'd say there have definitely been times where I've

686
00:34:18,680 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 2: considered walking away, not recently and not since I've kind

687
00:34:22,719 --> 00:34:25,680
Speaker 2: of got my life balance a little bit more on

688
00:34:25,760 --> 00:34:29,840
Speaker 2: track and therefore like moved away from burnout, and you know,

689
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:31,880
Speaker 2: there are still little bits and times where I'm like,

690
00:34:31,920 --> 00:34:34,759
Speaker 2: for fuck's sake, but I do genuinely, absolutely love what

691
00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:36,959
Speaker 2: I do, and I feel very privileged to be able

692
00:34:36,960 --> 00:34:38,920
Speaker 2: to do what I do. And also I've built my career.

693
00:34:39,320 --> 00:34:44,440
Speaker 2: I've like kind of reverse engineered my career towards exactly

694
00:34:44,440 --> 00:34:47,080
Speaker 2: what I want it to be. Like I kind of

695
00:34:47,080 --> 00:34:49,000
Speaker 2: fell into being an influencer at the one point and

696
00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,640
Speaker 2: then was like, this is I do not like again

697
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:53,880
Speaker 2: massive privilege. But it's like I do not like the

698
00:34:53,960 --> 00:34:55,759
Speaker 2: day to day of this. I do not like needing

699
00:34:55,800 --> 00:34:57,920
Speaker 2: to be liked in order for my career to be

700
00:34:57,960 --> 00:35:00,600
Speaker 2: work like doing well. I do not like into my

701
00:35:00,640 --> 00:35:02,560
Speaker 2: personal life for my career to be doing well all

702
00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:04,359
Speaker 2: of these things. And so literally built myself an office

703
00:35:04,440 --> 00:35:06,839
Speaker 2: job in the businesses and like, so I do think

704
00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 2: that I've like my job is made for me, like

705
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:14,160
Speaker 2: it's very tailored to me, which I feel very lucky

706
00:35:14,600 --> 00:35:17,600
Speaker 2: for for about because.

707
00:35:20,000 --> 00:35:25,360
Speaker 1: There is luck involved. There'd be luck baby be lucky

708
00:35:25,360 --> 00:35:28,960
Speaker 1: baby lucky. Yes, sometimes yes, But I think that the

709
00:35:30,160 --> 00:35:31,920
Speaker 1: you know, it absolutely takes it.

710
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:33,920
Speaker 2: It's tall, and I think that there have you know,

711
00:35:34,040 --> 00:35:36,360
Speaker 2: there have honestly been so many times where I'm like

712
00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:39,000
Speaker 2: what why have I like, why why did I need

713
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:43,120
Speaker 2: to make it so hard for myself? Just because like

714
00:35:43,239 --> 00:35:45,160
Speaker 2: there's not really a reason to take it this far?

715
00:35:45,320 --> 00:35:48,680
Speaker 2: Like why four businesses? Why not one business? You know,

716
00:35:48,800 --> 00:35:51,200
Speaker 2: why like, why do you need to do this? But

717
00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:55,440
Speaker 2: I think realistically, as I've said, it's all built for me,

718
00:35:55,920 --> 00:35:58,680
Speaker 2: and it's all been built around me, Like I've built

719
00:35:58,719 --> 00:36:01,799
Speaker 2: it that way, and I feel very fortunate too, Like

720
00:36:01,840 --> 00:36:04,080
Speaker 2: I think one of the biggest privileges in life is

721
00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:08,560
Speaker 2: being able to do work that you love and that

722
00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:12,000
Speaker 2: you genuinely love, because like everyone needs to work, or

723
00:36:12,040 --> 00:36:14,560
Speaker 2: most people need to work to be able to actually

724
00:36:14,640 --> 00:36:16,919
Speaker 2: enjoy it and feel like you are day to day

725
00:36:17,040 --> 00:36:22,920
Speaker 2: able to use your brain and kind of engage in

726
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:24,600
Speaker 2: the way you want to and be able to make

727
00:36:24,640 --> 00:36:25,200
Speaker 2: money from it.

728
00:36:25,280 --> 00:36:28,880
Speaker 1: Like I feel like that's very very lucky. Such a

729
00:36:28,920 --> 00:36:29,919
Speaker 1: good reminder as well.

730
00:36:30,120 --> 00:36:33,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, and so yes and no, you probably find me

731
00:36:33,360 --> 00:36:36,719
Speaker 2: some days where I'm like, yeah, absolutely, I need.

732
00:36:36,640 --> 00:36:38,319
Speaker 1: To get out of it to the choir I got,

733
00:36:38,560 --> 00:36:44,719
Speaker 1: Yeah exactly. I like something that you mentioned before, which is,

734
00:36:44,800 --> 00:36:47,560
Speaker 1: you know, you've you've spent your entire adult life online

735
00:36:48,160 --> 00:36:50,680
Speaker 1: at this point, how do you keep parts of you

736
00:36:51,680 --> 00:36:54,359
Speaker 1: just for you? You've obviously made a conscious decision about

737
00:36:54,400 --> 00:36:55,240
Speaker 1: that in many ways.

738
00:36:55,400 --> 00:36:59,480
Speaker 2: Yeah, So, as I kind of alluded to, then I

739
00:36:59,520 --> 00:37:01,600
Speaker 2: made a DECI is at one point to basically decide.

740
00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:03,080
Speaker 2: I was like I'm not going to be an influencer,

741
00:37:03,120 --> 00:37:04,919
Speaker 2: which you could absolutely still put me in that box.

742
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,959
Speaker 1: Now I probably wouldn't there, to be honest, thank you.

743
00:37:08,640 --> 00:37:09,040
Speaker 1: I don't know.

744
00:37:09,080 --> 00:37:12,719
Speaker 2: I think that like the as a tangent, like the

745
00:37:12,800 --> 00:37:20,560
Speaker 2: negative correlate. The negative kind of connotations of influencer is

746
00:37:20,640 --> 00:37:22,759
Speaker 2: very much directly correlated to the fact that it is

747
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:25,200
Speaker 2: one of the only industries where women out perform, oh yeah,

748
00:37:25,440 --> 00:37:26,799
Speaker 2: and make more money than.

749
00:37:26,680 --> 00:37:29,400
Speaker 1: Men and is a bad term. But if it's not

750
00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:32,120
Speaker 1: what your job title is, yeah, no, no, of course.

751
00:37:32,160 --> 00:37:34,280
Speaker 2: But I think that, like I try and get comfortable

752
00:37:34,320 --> 00:37:36,759
Speaker 2: with the fact that, like, technically it is what I'm

753
00:37:36,760 --> 00:37:39,080
Speaker 2: doing in you know, certain areas, and like, probably the

754
00:37:39,120 --> 00:37:42,440
Speaker 2: only reason we have these negative connotations around it is

755
00:37:42,520 --> 00:37:46,760
Speaker 2: because women outperform in that area and therefore naturally it's easy.

756
00:37:47,320 --> 00:37:49,120
Speaker 1: Yeah, it must be so easy, and it must be.

757
00:37:49,120 --> 00:37:51,040
Speaker 2: Vapid, and it must be all of these different things.

758
00:37:51,160 --> 00:37:55,560
Speaker 2: Any Way, I.

759
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:58,040
Speaker 1: Kind of decided that.

760
00:37:56,719 --> 00:37:58,960
Speaker 2: That wasn't for me in that I didn't enjoy the

761
00:37:59,000 --> 00:38:00,880
Speaker 2: day to day, as I said, so I built myself,

762
00:38:01,400 --> 00:38:03,839
Speaker 2: you know, I deleted all my videos off YouTube overnight

763
00:38:04,960 --> 00:38:08,080
Speaker 2: and kind of that was where my main earnings were

764
00:38:08,360 --> 00:38:11,279
Speaker 2: and I stopped really posting properly online for like two

765
00:38:11,480 --> 00:38:16,160
Speaker 2: three years and concentrate on building businesses. I was like,

766
00:38:16,160 --> 00:38:18,560
Speaker 2: I want to build these into like what can actually

767
00:38:18,960 --> 00:38:22,719
Speaker 2: sustain me, and the team is a job, so double

768
00:38:22,800 --> 00:38:24,719
Speaker 2: down on that. And I think that, you know, that

769
00:38:24,800 --> 00:38:27,680
Speaker 2: has enabled me to be in the fortunate position where

770
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:31,680
Speaker 2: I don't need to share anything that I don't want

771
00:38:31,719 --> 00:38:35,080
Speaker 2: to share in order to make income.

772
00:38:35,560 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 1: And so I feel like I'm in a nice position

773
00:38:39,920 --> 00:38:42,080
Speaker 1: now where I can share what i'd like to share

774
00:38:42,120 --> 00:38:45,040
Speaker 1: and what I find would be helpful to share and

775
00:38:45,560 --> 00:38:47,840
Speaker 1: feel happy doing so. And I feel much more happy

776
00:38:47,880 --> 00:38:51,799
Speaker 1: doing so knowing that there is not no obligation, and

777
00:38:51,880 --> 00:38:56,320
Speaker 1: so I think that actually has I don't know, probably

778
00:38:56,320 --> 00:38:58,080
Speaker 1: in a weird way recently, like some people over the

779
00:38:58,120 --> 00:38:59,480
Speaker 1: past few years have been like, oh, I think you're

780
00:38:59,480 --> 00:39:02,080
Speaker 1: sharing more, and I was like, yeah, no, I probably am,

781
00:39:02,120 --> 00:39:04,120
Speaker 1: because I don't feel like backed against a wall in

782
00:39:04,160 --> 00:39:06,040
Speaker 1: a way of like, oh God, I've got to give

783
00:39:06,040 --> 00:39:08,359
Speaker 1: you this vulnerability so that you actually like me, like

784
00:39:08,400 --> 00:39:12,000
Speaker 1: it's an exchange, and I don't want that, like I

785
00:39:12,000 --> 00:39:14,239
Speaker 1: don't want to need to give you all of the

786
00:39:14,280 --> 00:39:15,840
Speaker 1: five bad things that are happening in my life for

787
00:39:15,840 --> 00:39:19,880
Speaker 1: you to give me basic human respect, and so I

788
00:39:19,880 --> 00:39:23,320
Speaker 1: think that I'm, I guess, in a happy place around

789
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:26,040
Speaker 1: that now it's organic. With that in mind, there has

790
00:39:26,040 --> 00:39:28,200
Speaker 1: been things that you have shared online that are very,

791
00:39:28,239 --> 00:39:31,440
Speaker 1: very personal and it's obviously come from an organic place

792
00:39:31,920 --> 00:39:35,799
Speaker 1: for you to share it, including a mischaracter you had

793
00:39:35,840 --> 00:39:39,080
Speaker 1: last year. Did you think about not sharing that? Yeah?

794
00:39:39,120 --> 00:39:42,680
Speaker 2: Absolutely, And I didn't share it for a good while

795
00:39:43,080 --> 00:39:44,719
Speaker 2: after it happened, in not a good while, like a

796
00:39:44,760 --> 00:39:51,880
Speaker 2: few months, wow. And I think that I was driven

797
00:39:51,920 --> 00:39:54,200
Speaker 2: by a few reasons for sharing it. I think that

798
00:39:54,320 --> 00:39:58,000
Speaker 2: like one part of it was like, definitely, and I

799
00:39:58,000 --> 00:40:00,920
Speaker 2: wouldn't stand by this is a good reason sharing, but

800
00:40:01,120 --> 00:40:04,200
Speaker 2: I definitely like it was meant to be a really

801
00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:07,520
Speaker 2: intense work month and I still worked a lot. But

802
00:40:07,600 --> 00:40:10,040
Speaker 2: I think that like I just hadn't been myself and

803
00:40:10,080 --> 00:40:13,440
Speaker 2: hadn't like done things to the best of my ability

804
00:40:13,640 --> 00:40:16,279
Speaker 2: that month, and so I kind of felt like I

805
00:40:16,320 --> 00:40:18,400
Speaker 2: was like, oh, by the way, guys, this is why

806
00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:20,919
Speaker 2: I've been so shit. But that wasn't the main reason

807
00:40:20,920 --> 00:40:22,920
Speaker 2: for sharing. The main reason was more the fact that

808
00:40:23,040 --> 00:40:26,400
Speaker 2: I found it so insane, how there was so much

809
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:30,799
Speaker 2: taboo around it. And how it was automatically like you're pregnant, yay,

810
00:40:30,960 --> 00:40:33,600
Speaker 2: oh you miscarried, all, let's not talk about that like

811
00:40:33,800 --> 00:40:37,640
Speaker 2: that is the blame is on the woman, the kind

812
00:40:37,680 --> 00:40:40,880
Speaker 2: of I don't know, the onus for everything was on

813
00:40:40,920 --> 00:40:43,399
Speaker 2: the woman. The taboo is on them. They mostly can't

814
00:40:43,440 --> 00:40:46,520
Speaker 2: tell their workplace because there's still loads of associations around it,

815
00:40:46,560 --> 00:40:47,759
Speaker 2: and they don't know if they're actually going to get

816
00:40:47,760 --> 00:40:49,279
Speaker 2: the support and if that's just going to make them

817
00:40:49,280 --> 00:40:53,520
Speaker 2: feel even shitter, and you know, whether it's something that

818
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:56,319
Speaker 2: they even want to say, because then their employer knows

819
00:40:56,360 --> 00:40:58,520
Speaker 2: they're trying for a baby, like all of these different things.

820
00:40:59,160 --> 00:41:00,840
Speaker 2: And I kind of just wanted to talk about it

821
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:03,080
Speaker 2: because it was actually so fucking hard to go through

822
00:41:03,560 --> 00:41:07,799
Speaker 2: that I just was like, I can't believe that this

823
00:41:07,920 --> 00:41:13,040
Speaker 2: in any way is made to be like made out

824
00:41:13,080 --> 00:41:16,680
Speaker 2: to be not necessarily like my fault, but kind of

825
00:41:16,719 --> 00:41:20,760
Speaker 2: like we shouldn't talk about it because it might embarrass

826
00:41:20,800 --> 00:41:23,319
Speaker 2: other people or it might make people feel awkward. And

827
00:41:23,360 --> 00:41:25,279
Speaker 2: I even had that from like some people quite close

828
00:41:25,320 --> 00:41:28,160
Speaker 2: to me, when I was like, never even like saying

829
00:41:28,200 --> 00:41:31,000
Speaker 2: the word or acknowledging the thing or even like asking

830
00:41:31,040 --> 00:41:35,279
Speaker 2: how I was like it was very you know, and

831
00:41:35,360 --> 00:41:39,600
Speaker 2: I just thought, God, that's crazy, Like people for years

832
00:41:39,600 --> 00:41:44,360
Speaker 2: and years decades haven't said anything about it ever because

833
00:41:44,360 --> 00:41:46,880
Speaker 2: it's just a taboo subject. And I just thought, I

834
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:50,400
Speaker 2: don't like taboo subjects that are taboo and create shame

835
00:41:50,520 --> 00:41:54,040
Speaker 2: for the woman when there's no reason for it.

836
00:41:54,440 --> 00:41:58,040
Speaker 1: And it's like this final frontier of grief almost that

837
00:41:58,080 --> 00:42:01,120
Speaker 1: we are yet to really have any good language for

838
00:42:01,160 --> 00:42:04,160
Speaker 1: speaking about, Like we don't have great language for talking

839
00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:06,879
Speaker 1: about grief in other areas or mental health in other

840
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:10,640
Speaker 1: areas or anything. But for this one, it does feel like, really,

841
00:42:10,719 --> 00:42:13,920
Speaker 1: you don't see anybody talk about it. Yeah, and that

842
00:42:14,000 --> 00:42:15,799
Speaker 1: must have been really scary for you to step into

843
00:42:15,880 --> 00:42:17,960
Speaker 1: and be like, if I don't see anybody talking about it,

844
00:42:18,040 --> 00:42:19,960
Speaker 1: how are people going to react? Yeah?

845
00:42:20,040 --> 00:42:23,120
Speaker 2: No, absolutely, And I think that I do believe that

846
00:42:23,160 --> 00:42:26,000
Speaker 2: when you have a platform, you do actually have some

847
00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:31,319
Speaker 2: sort of responsibility to, well, you have more propensity to

848
00:42:31,360 --> 00:42:34,160
Speaker 2: make the world a place that the place that you

849
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:36,160
Speaker 2: would want it to be, so you have a sort

850
00:42:36,160 --> 00:42:39,360
Speaker 2: of responsibility to Okay, well, no, you don't need to

851
00:42:39,360 --> 00:42:40,560
Speaker 2: share things that you don't want to share.

852
00:42:40,680 --> 00:42:40,960
Speaker 1: Like that.

853
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:43,360
Speaker 2: I don't think is owed to the general public. But

854
00:42:43,400 --> 00:42:45,960
Speaker 2: I do think that if you can do something to

855
00:42:46,000 --> 00:42:49,840
Speaker 2: make the world a place that's more reflective of the

856
00:42:49,880 --> 00:42:52,400
Speaker 2: place that you'd want it to be, than like why not.

857
00:42:54,080 --> 00:42:56,080
Speaker 2: And so yeah, it was a decision at the time

858
00:42:56,080 --> 00:42:59,920
Speaker 2: because I wanted to. I wanted it to be something

859
00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:03,239
Speaker 2: where you can say that without like I felt like

860
00:43:03,280 --> 00:43:05,759
Speaker 2: I couldn't even say it without like ruining someone else's day.

861
00:43:06,520 --> 00:43:08,359
Speaker 2: And I was just like, I get that, But at

862
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:10,239
Speaker 2: the same time, like, if I need to disclose this

863
00:43:10,320 --> 00:43:13,319
Speaker 2: to you for some reason, I need to not go

864
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:15,040
Speaker 2: into overdrive of like, oh, I'm so sorry, but it's

865
00:43:15,040 --> 00:43:17,080
Speaker 2: also fine. It's fine, you know, like you don't get

866
00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:21,880
Speaker 2: you know, it's okay, and it's like it's really difficult.

867
00:43:21,400 --> 00:43:23,080
Speaker 1: And every time you swallow it, it's like, I'm so

868
00:43:23,120 --> 00:43:25,120
Speaker 1: worried about burdening this person one time, and it's like

869
00:43:25,280 --> 00:43:27,799
Speaker 1: and I burden myself every day, Yeah, every single day.

870
00:43:28,000 --> 00:43:30,400
Speaker 1: Were you worried about a particular kind of reaction? Was

871
00:43:30,400 --> 00:43:32,399
Speaker 1: the one that scared you the most that people might

872
00:43:32,440 --> 00:43:33,279
Speaker 1: have I think.

873
00:43:33,239 --> 00:43:36,920
Speaker 2: Quite because it was so fresh in terms of like emotions,

874
00:43:36,960 --> 00:43:38,640
Speaker 2: and I think, you know, it will be for a

875
00:43:38,640 --> 00:43:42,279
Speaker 2: long time. I think I'm always worried about like the

876
00:43:42,320 --> 00:43:46,959
Speaker 2: Internet having like fuel with which to you know, throw

877
00:43:47,000 --> 00:43:51,279
Speaker 2: it you when is desired. So like, for example, I

878
00:43:51,320 --> 00:43:53,560
Speaker 2: did a post a few weeks later that was like

879
00:43:53,800 --> 00:43:57,319
Speaker 2: talking about the risk of reform coming into power in

880
00:43:57,360 --> 00:44:01,560
Speaker 2: the UK and the different impacts that would have on

881
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:07,440
Speaker 2: essentially society in like various different ways, and one of

882
00:44:07,800 --> 00:44:10,920
Speaker 2: someone commented on that being like you should be concentrating

883
00:44:10,920 --> 00:44:13,240
Speaker 2: more on keeping your babies alive than.

884
00:44:14,040 --> 00:44:16,600
Speaker 1: Talking about this. I'm just laughing about. Obviously it's a

885
00:44:16,600 --> 00:44:20,040
Speaker 1: lot of horror comment, but it's also so outrageous that

886
00:44:20,120 --> 00:44:22,160
Speaker 1: I was like, like I literally saw it while having

887
00:44:22,200 --> 00:44:24,880
Speaker 1: backfast with my husband, and I literally like choked, Like

888
00:44:24,960 --> 00:44:27,279
Speaker 1: I was like, oh my god, you're not going to

889
00:44:27,360 --> 00:44:29,759
Speaker 1: believe this. And I was just like that, to be

890
00:44:29,840 --> 00:44:31,680
Speaker 1: fair as you can tell, like that type of thing

891
00:44:31,680 --> 00:44:33,560
Speaker 1: doesn't really affect me, because you've got to be so

892
00:44:33,800 --> 00:44:37,479
Speaker 1: fucked up for that to actually look it anywhere out

893
00:44:37,480 --> 00:44:41,520
Speaker 1: of your keyboard, like for you to be brain email brain,

894
00:44:41,719 --> 00:44:44,760
Speaker 1: like unless that's a violent, intrusive thought that you literally

895
00:44:44,800 --> 00:44:47,759
Speaker 1: cannot keep under control. Like the fact that you've now

896
00:44:47,800 --> 00:44:50,120
Speaker 1: put that onto paper and like got that out is

897
00:44:50,200 --> 00:44:54,120
Speaker 1: just I have to feel so sorry for you because

898
00:44:54,200 --> 00:44:56,759
Speaker 1: you must be so miserable. And I know people say

899
00:44:56,760 --> 00:44:58,760
Speaker 1: that it's like they must be miserable, they must be miserable.

900
00:44:58,760 --> 00:45:01,040
Speaker 2: It's like I don't believe that all online commentary must

901
00:45:01,040 --> 00:45:04,400
Speaker 2: be from people who are miserable. But it's literally like wow,

902
00:45:05,040 --> 00:45:08,319
Speaker 2: like wow, you must be so hurt inside about like

903
00:45:08,360 --> 00:45:09,640
Speaker 2: I don't know who didn't listen.

904
00:45:09,400 --> 00:45:13,279
Speaker 1: To you when, but like wow, I almost see that

905
00:45:13,320 --> 00:45:16,640
Speaker 1: as like soo like sociopathy. Oh yeah, I genuinely want

906
00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:18,920
Speaker 1: this person. I want to put them in a little

907
00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:22,680
Speaker 1: cage and I'm just like, what's wrong with you? Yeah?

908
00:45:22,760 --> 00:45:25,520
Speaker 1: Literally to have a look around like that's that's a

909
00:45:25,680 --> 00:45:28,359
Speaker 1: good I actually very few things like me speechless. Oh

910
00:45:28,440 --> 00:45:31,080
Speaker 1: that was. I was like, what was your husband's reaction?

911
00:45:31,160 --> 00:45:32,600
Speaker 1: Because yours was like, oh my god?

912
00:45:32,760 --> 00:45:35,480
Speaker 2: Was he just like he was quite angry about it,

913
00:45:35,480 --> 00:45:37,200
Speaker 2: and he was like how I think. I mean he'd

914
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:39,200
Speaker 2: obviously gone through it as well. I think he'd you know,

915
00:45:39,640 --> 00:45:43,120
Speaker 2: seen me going through that, and then was like fucking hell,

916
00:45:43,200 --> 00:45:47,839
Speaker 2: like that is terrible. But I thought it was so

917
00:45:47,880 --> 00:45:50,160
Speaker 2: bad that I actually found it hilarious, like as in

918
00:45:50,239 --> 00:45:51,839
Speaker 2: like I send it to some of my friends and I.

919
00:45:51,760 --> 00:45:53,560
Speaker 1: Was like, oh my god, and my.

920
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:56,239
Speaker 2: Friends are sending me paragraphs back like this person is

921
00:45:56,239 --> 00:45:58,440
Speaker 2: like probably, and I was like, guys, I'm laughing, like

922
00:45:58,480 --> 00:46:01,880
Speaker 2: I'm literally laughing because you go that it's a horseshoe,

923
00:46:02,000 --> 00:46:05,560
Speaker 2: like come like so derayed. That is just back to money. Actually,

924
00:46:06,040 --> 00:46:09,279
Speaker 2: like you you have more problems than I have. If

925
00:46:09,360 --> 00:46:14,160
Speaker 2: you are sending the anonymous account. Probably yeah, probably like

926
00:46:14,160 --> 00:46:19,759
Speaker 2: Psalms thirteen in the literally love that neighbor. Sorry not

927
00:46:19,840 --> 00:46:22,160
Speaker 2: to laugh at the end of what was a heavy conversation.

928
00:46:23,480 --> 00:46:26,400
Speaker 2: Sorry innes sing song voice.

929
00:46:27,920 --> 00:46:32,600
Speaker 1: Shit again the thing you're going to be thinking about.

930
00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:34,440
Speaker 1: I know I'm going to go home and be like,

931
00:46:34,560 --> 00:46:36,919
Speaker 1: dang it. Sorry not to not to make you feel

932
00:46:36,960 --> 00:46:44,920
Speaker 1: but I just think that comments crazy. And you're expecting

933
00:46:45,040 --> 00:46:48,000
Speaker 1: again now, and I get so many questions about becoming

934
00:46:48,120 --> 00:46:50,879
Speaker 1: a mother in your twenties. I haven't had that experience yet,

935
00:46:51,320 --> 00:46:52,879
Speaker 1: and I don't actually get to talk to many people

936
00:46:52,920 --> 00:46:56,719
Speaker 1: who had. So what is surprising you most about that

937
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:58,480
Speaker 1: whole chapter in your life, from finding out you were

938
00:46:58,480 --> 00:47:01,319
Speaker 1: pregnant for the first time to now carrying your second child.

939
00:47:01,680 --> 00:47:04,319
Speaker 2: I think what's been surprising me most generally is like,

940
00:47:04,520 --> 00:47:08,520
Speaker 2: how outrageous and varied and intense. All the different symptoms

941
00:47:08,520 --> 00:47:11,239
Speaker 2: of pregnancy are that are our one hundred percent kept

942
00:47:11,320 --> 00:47:13,960
Speaker 2: under wraps for a reason. And I would have one

943
00:47:14,040 --> 00:47:16,600
Speaker 2: hundred percent still decided that I wanted a baby and

944
00:47:16,800 --> 00:47:18,719
Speaker 2: that I wanted to be pregnant, But at the same time,

945
00:47:18,840 --> 00:47:23,759
Speaker 2: like the fine print is not clear, and I think

946
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:26,439
Speaker 2: we like again, it's like our sex education for women

947
00:47:26,560 --> 00:47:27,360
Speaker 2: is so terrible.

948
00:47:28,080 --> 00:47:34,319
Speaker 1: Sorry, I'm not crying. It's reflex the role. I want

949
00:47:34,320 --> 00:47:39,320
Speaker 1: more sex. Like this sex education for women and actually

950
00:47:39,320 --> 00:47:43,960
Speaker 1: probably more for girls is like so so terrible and

951
00:47:44,160 --> 00:47:47,040
Speaker 1: so fixated on like don't have sex, don't get pregnant.

952
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:49,360
Speaker 1: Like okay, well what about when we're talking about like

953
00:47:49,400 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 1: if you choose to get pregnant or you find yourself

954
00:47:52,160 --> 00:47:55,360
Speaker 1: in a situation where you are pregnant, Like what's actually happening?

955
00:47:55,400 --> 00:47:57,120
Speaker 1: What are all the different symptoms? Like there are some

956
00:47:57,440 --> 00:48:00,960
Speaker 1: fucked symptoms that are absolutely kept from you. Like what

957
00:48:01,200 --> 00:48:03,440
Speaker 1: the I think it's the average woman ends up with

958
00:48:03,520 --> 00:48:07,360
Speaker 1: three point one decayed teeth after pregnancy because the baby

959
00:48:07,400 --> 00:48:10,000
Speaker 1: just takes all the nutrients from all your calcium, like

960
00:48:10,080 --> 00:48:14,480
Speaker 1: everything from you. There's like all sorts like your absoplit

961
00:48:14,520 --> 00:48:16,960
Speaker 1: in half sometimes they'll have to be surgically put back together.

962
00:48:17,040 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 1: But like all of the I honestly think I'm antipr

963
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:20,839
Speaker 1: for pregnancy, and I don't mean to be that way

964
00:48:20,840 --> 00:48:22,759
Speaker 1: because I do think that like, if you would like

965
00:48:22,800 --> 00:48:25,360
Speaker 1: to be pregnant, then hopefully you're able to get pregnant.

966
00:48:26,000 --> 00:48:31,480
Speaker 1: I also do just think that it is presented to

967
00:48:31,600 --> 00:48:39,239
Speaker 1: women as a a necessity, be a kind of well,

968
00:48:39,280 --> 00:48:41,719
Speaker 1: this is just the way it is. And mark my words,

969
00:48:41,880 --> 00:48:45,839
Speaker 1: if the symptoms were on the other gendered foot, there

970
00:48:45,880 --> 00:48:48,680
Speaker 1: would be better research, there would be better medication, there

971
00:48:48,719 --> 00:48:50,920
Speaker 1: would be better management, all of these different things. There

972
00:48:50,920 --> 00:48:53,839
Speaker 1: would probably be paid pregnancy leave, like all of these

973
00:48:53,840 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 1: different things. I just think it's not being made clear.

974
00:48:57,920 --> 00:48:59,680
Speaker 1: And I think that anyone who wants to have a

975
00:48:59,760 --> 00:49:03,040
Speaker 1: child would still decide to do so. It's just that

976
00:49:03,400 --> 00:49:08,960
Speaker 1: there is not a lot of well spread educational information.

977
00:49:09,600 --> 00:49:12,359
Speaker 1: So I'd say say that's the biggest shocking case. It's

978
00:49:12,400 --> 00:49:14,880
Speaker 1: not clear. By my general demeanor. It's like people will

979
00:49:14,920 --> 00:49:17,319
Speaker 1: climb the mountain, but they should know what's on the

980
00:49:17,320 --> 00:49:20,160
Speaker 1: mountains well exactly, they still to do it, like I

981
00:49:20,160 --> 00:49:21,560
Speaker 1: still would have done it, but at the same time,

982
00:49:21,600 --> 00:49:23,120
Speaker 1: like you don't need to be lying to me about

983
00:49:23,120 --> 00:49:25,080
Speaker 1: like all the things I'm going to go through, and

984
00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:27,680
Speaker 1: of course that is to somewhat our responsibility to find out,

985
00:49:27,719 --> 00:49:29,920
Speaker 1: but at the same time, like it's a major medical

986
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:37,120
Speaker 1: event that's essentially considered twelve. Yeah, you're a girlypop so yeah, sorry,

987
00:49:37,680 --> 00:49:41,920
Speaker 1: teeth anymore, Well the baby took them. Yeah, obviously. My

988
00:49:42,239 --> 00:49:43,759
Speaker 1: boyfriend went to the movies the other day and he

989
00:49:43,800 --> 00:49:46,799
Speaker 1: came back and he was like white faced. He was like,

990
00:49:46,800 --> 00:49:50,760
Speaker 1: do you know that women proove themselves when they give birth?

991
00:49:51,719 --> 00:49:55,879
Speaker 1: And I was like, yeah, he goes seventy five percent

992
00:49:55,920 --> 00:49:58,400
Speaker 1: of them do yeah, And I was like yeah, I know.

993
00:49:58,480 --> 00:50:00,320
Speaker 1: And he was like, they need to tell what people

994
00:50:00,320 --> 00:50:02,319
Speaker 1: about that, and I was like, that's why. That's the

995
00:50:02,480 --> 00:50:05,120
Speaker 1: lost of the problem. I was going to say. I know.

996
00:50:05,160 --> 00:50:06,840
Speaker 1: He went on a whole Google page and I was like,

997
00:50:07,040 --> 00:50:09,319
Speaker 1: and this is why that's important as well, because often

998
00:50:09,360 --> 00:50:12,160
Speaker 1: the burden is on you experiencing it as a mother,

999
00:50:12,640 --> 00:50:16,680
Speaker 1: women around you, hearing those feeling scared, never like men

1000
00:50:17,040 --> 00:50:19,880
Speaker 1: just knowing the woman's experience. Well slightly tied to that,

1001
00:50:19,920 --> 00:50:23,279
Speaker 1: I read an article I watched a tick shop.

1002
00:50:23,080 --> 00:50:26,080
Speaker 2: Right the other day, very very interesting and it was

1003
00:50:26,160 --> 00:50:28,359
Speaker 2: essentially about the research gap between men and women when

1004
00:50:28,360 --> 00:50:32,040
Speaker 2: it comes to parenting and why it creates default parenthood

1005
00:50:32,080 --> 00:50:36,000
Speaker 2: and why it creates therefore, like essentially the uneven society

1006
00:50:36,000 --> 00:50:38,279
Speaker 2: in which we operate, where women are expected to take

1007
00:50:38,320 --> 00:50:40,879
Speaker 2: on a significant amount of unpaid labor in comparison to men,

1008
00:50:41,080 --> 00:50:43,200
Speaker 2: particularly when it comes to things like parenting, but also

1009
00:50:43,239 --> 00:50:45,440
Speaker 2: housework and all of this. And it was essentially just saying,

1010
00:50:45,440 --> 00:50:49,480
Speaker 2: how like women, because pregnancy is happening to them, will

1011
00:50:49,719 --> 00:50:54,640
Speaker 2: take on the burden of education around birth, around pregnancy,

1012
00:50:54,719 --> 00:50:58,960
Speaker 2: around parenting, around like baby's health, all of these different things,

1013
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:03,640
Speaker 2: and then they take on that burden and that naturally

1014
00:51:03,680 --> 00:51:06,960
Speaker 2: isn't replicated in the men because pregnancy isn't happening to them,

1015
00:51:07,360 --> 00:51:10,040
Speaker 2: Like ideally they would see it as such if their

1016
00:51:10,160 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 2: partner is pregnant, but it's actually not naturally the case,

1017
00:51:15,040 --> 00:51:19,000
Speaker 2: even i'd expect in some progressive relationships. And therefore there

1018
00:51:19,040 --> 00:51:20,920
Speaker 2: is this research gap, which means that when by the

1019
00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:24,080
Speaker 2: time you have the baby, the woman spends a lot

1020
00:51:24,080 --> 00:51:27,480
Speaker 2: of time educating the man and maybe correcting on certain

1021
00:51:27,520 --> 00:51:28,960
Speaker 2: things like oh, you meant to support the head, or

1022
00:51:29,000 --> 00:51:30,719
Speaker 2: you meant to do this, or like whatever it might be,

1023
00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:35,320
Speaker 2: which results in the default parent becoming the mum despite

1024
00:51:35,320 --> 00:51:36,520
Speaker 2: the fact that you both had a baby at the

1025
00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:39,120
Speaker 2: same time, and this obviously naturally then goes around in

1026
00:51:39,160 --> 00:51:41,279
Speaker 2: circles in terms of who does more parenting, childcare, like

1027
00:51:41,320 --> 00:51:43,600
Speaker 2: all of these different things. And I think that's so

1028
00:51:43,680 --> 00:51:46,680
Speaker 2: interesting again because it's like pregnancy is seen as a

1029
00:51:46,680 --> 00:51:52,000
Speaker 2: women's issue and it's not advertised thoroughly at all regardless, So.

1030
00:51:53,880 --> 00:51:55,080
Speaker 1: What are we gonna do about it? What's so, what

1031
00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:56,520
Speaker 1: are we gonna do about work? Grace is gonna make

1032
00:51:56,520 --> 00:51:57,960
Speaker 1: some tiktoks? That's what are we gonna do about it?

1033
00:51:58,000 --> 00:52:00,520
Speaker 1: It's gonna make everyone hear about it. I can't remember

1034
00:52:00,520 --> 00:52:03,759
Speaker 1: what that meme was, but it was like being the

1035
00:52:03,960 --> 00:52:06,720
Speaker 1: opposite of someone who suffers in silence, like you will

1036
00:52:06,760 --> 00:52:09,839
Speaker 1: be forced or like you know, quiet interests or all

1037
00:52:09,880 --> 00:52:11,239
Speaker 1: of that, like you will be forced to her about

1038
00:52:11,239 --> 00:52:13,439
Speaker 1: what I'm interested in and what I'm reading about. Yeah,

1039
00:52:13,560 --> 00:52:15,759
Speaker 1: I'm afraid I want men to make those tiktoks as well.

1040
00:52:15,840 --> 00:52:17,799
Speaker 1: I feel like, yes, I just think that would be

1041
00:52:18,560 --> 00:52:20,719
Speaker 1: just so valuable to you. Here's what I'm learning. I

1042
00:52:20,760 --> 00:52:24,279
Speaker 1: know I want to like them. I like to repost them. Yeah,

1043
00:52:24,280 --> 00:52:32,160
Speaker 1: she's fighting the good fact. Yeah, exactly. I have two

1044
00:52:32,160 --> 00:52:34,359
Speaker 1: more questions for you about motherhood, and then one more question.

1045
00:52:34,560 --> 00:52:38,320
Speaker 1: That's three, three more questions. I know, thank you. Another

1046
00:52:38,360 --> 00:52:42,000
Speaker 1: thing on my on my resume. You're having a girl.

1047
00:52:42,480 --> 00:52:45,960
Speaker 1: What are you most excited to do with her? I

1048
00:52:45,960 --> 00:52:49,480
Speaker 1: don't know. I think like my biggest, like one of

1049
00:52:49,480 --> 00:52:52,600
Speaker 1: my biggest life aims. And I think this maybe surprises

1050
00:52:52,640 --> 00:52:57,400
Speaker 1: people because I think we do group particularly women into boxes.

1051
00:52:57,440 --> 00:52:59,160
Speaker 1: You're like, you're a career woman, or you're like a

1052
00:52:59,239 --> 00:53:00,560
Speaker 1: mumsy woman, or you're like this.

1053
00:53:02,120 --> 00:53:06,480
Speaker 2: But like my biggest like aim in life is to

1054
00:53:06,560 --> 00:53:10,680
Speaker 2: have a close knit, loving family, Like that is just

1055
00:53:10,719 --> 00:53:15,439
Speaker 2: like my driving force, and I feel very excited about

1056
00:53:15,480 --> 00:53:19,320
Speaker 2: the opportunity of building that with my husband and building

1057
00:53:19,400 --> 00:53:23,000
Speaker 2: it to be exactly what we have hoped. And I

1058
00:53:23,080 --> 00:53:26,200
Speaker 2: have no doubt that it's going to be very you know,

1059
00:53:26,200 --> 00:53:27,520
Speaker 2: there are going to be many things that don't go

1060
00:53:27,560 --> 00:53:31,239
Speaker 2: to plan. But at the same time, like I just

1061
00:53:31,239 --> 00:53:34,040
Speaker 2: can't wait, Like I can't wait to for my life

1062
00:53:34,080 --> 00:53:36,279
Speaker 2: to get a bit smaller for a while, Like I

1063
00:53:36,360 --> 00:53:39,640
Speaker 2: really I think I've concentrated for a very long time

1064
00:53:39,880 --> 00:53:42,480
Speaker 2: on not making my life as big as possible, because

1065
00:53:42,520 --> 00:53:47,120
Speaker 2: that's not been the driving force, but like reaching everything

1066
00:53:47,160 --> 00:53:49,160
Speaker 2: I want to reach in life and like kind of

1067
00:53:49,280 --> 00:53:53,200
Speaker 2: really working so hard to get there, and of course

1068
00:53:53,239 --> 00:53:57,360
Speaker 2: I'll continue to do so. Like I feel very strongly

1069
00:53:57,400 --> 00:53:59,239
Speaker 2: about being very open about the fact that I will

1070
00:53:59,280 --> 00:54:00,680
Speaker 2: be going back to work looking full time.

1071
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:03,920
Speaker 1: And I think that it's insane that anyone who would

1072
00:54:04,239 --> 00:54:06,839
Speaker 1: know me or see what I've done be surprised at

1073
00:54:06,840 --> 00:54:08,520
Speaker 1: the fact that I will have child's care or the

1074
00:54:08,520 --> 00:54:11,040
Speaker 1: fact that I will you know, be working, or any

1075
00:54:11,080 --> 00:54:13,319
Speaker 1: of these things. But I just think that, like I

1076
00:54:13,400 --> 00:54:17,040
Speaker 1: really can't wait for the concentration just to be a

1077
00:54:17,040 --> 00:54:21,440
Speaker 1: bit little bit simpler, and like I just know, like

1078
00:54:21,640 --> 00:54:24,680
Speaker 1: all I care about generally is as much as you

1079
00:54:24,680 --> 00:54:26,759
Speaker 1: know I care about work and all of this, Like

1080
00:54:26,800 --> 00:54:30,120
Speaker 1: that's kind of one side. The main things I care

1081
00:54:30,160 --> 00:54:34,279
Speaker 1: about are like relationships and the people around me, and

1082
00:54:34,320 --> 00:54:39,160
Speaker 1: I just can't wait to build our little, oh little family.

1083
00:54:40,040 --> 00:54:41,880
Speaker 1: I actually saw this quote from Steve Crah I think

1084
00:54:41,920 --> 00:54:44,439
Speaker 1: You'll love, which is he was talking about how when

1085
00:54:44,440 --> 00:54:46,840
Speaker 1: he had a kid, he was like everything in my

1086
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:49,920
Speaker 1: professional life got easier because speaking of failure is like

1087
00:54:49,960 --> 00:54:51,799
Speaker 1: I didn't care if they didn't like me or if

1088
00:54:51,840 --> 00:54:55,359
Speaker 1: I failed because I had I had all this well

1089
00:54:55,800 --> 00:54:58,120
Speaker 1: plain too. Oh my god, I'm so excited for you.

1090
00:54:59,480 --> 00:55:01,680
Speaker 1: I want to feel the episode with this question, which is,

1091
00:55:01,760 --> 00:55:03,560
Speaker 1: what is one piece of advice you have for people

1092
00:55:03,600 --> 00:55:09,080
Speaker 1: in their twenties that we haven't spoken about today? So much?

1093
00:55:09,880 --> 00:55:13,760
Speaker 1: There's so much I want to say. Can I split

1094
00:55:13,800 --> 00:55:15,719
Speaker 1: them up? You can do as many as you want.

1095
00:55:15,719 --> 00:55:18,080
Speaker 1: I feel like you are for an hour. So were

1096
00:55:18,120 --> 00:55:21,480
Speaker 1: you going to start that two now? Okay?

1097
00:55:21,480 --> 00:55:23,759
Speaker 2: Career wise, yeah, I think that there's a lot of

1098
00:55:23,800 --> 00:55:27,839
Speaker 2: focus right now on getting as far as you can

1099
00:55:27,880 --> 00:55:31,600
Speaker 2: in your twenties and being as big as you can

1100
00:55:31,640 --> 00:55:34,719
Speaker 2: in whatever sense that might be. So, for example, if

1101
00:55:34,719 --> 00:55:37,239
Speaker 2: it is impressive in your industry to be freelanced rather

1102
00:55:37,280 --> 00:55:40,360
Speaker 2: than to be within a company, there's such a rush

1103
00:55:40,400 --> 00:55:43,520
Speaker 2: to get there. There's such a rush to like get

1104
00:55:43,560 --> 00:55:46,600
Speaker 2: those accolades or establish those things that make you be

1105
00:55:46,640 --> 00:55:50,640
Speaker 2: taken more seriously. I honestly could not recommend enough, and

1106
00:55:50,680 --> 00:55:53,520
Speaker 2: I wish I'd done more of this. Learning as much

1107
00:55:53,520 --> 00:55:59,400
Speaker 2: as you can on employers' money, like upskilling, trying new jobs,

1108
00:55:59,760 --> 00:56:02,960
Speaker 2: work in different types of teams, talking to as many

1109
00:56:03,000 --> 00:56:07,880
Speaker 2: people as possible about their jobs, like your career is

1110
00:56:08,000 --> 00:56:10,600
Speaker 2: much longer than it's made out to be on TikTok.

1111
00:56:10,880 --> 00:56:14,359
Speaker 2: And that's not me kind of patronizing and saying like you,

1112
00:56:14,360 --> 00:56:16,560
Speaker 2: but like that is a lot of the media we're

1113
00:56:16,600 --> 00:56:19,600
Speaker 2: consuming and we're seeing, you know, success looks like this

1114
00:56:19,760 --> 00:56:22,080
Speaker 2: at thirty. Your career is going to be a hell

1115
00:56:22,120 --> 00:56:24,560
Speaker 2: of a lot longer than thirty. And if you want

1116
00:56:24,600 --> 00:56:26,759
Speaker 2: to enjoy it and to have longevity and all of that,

1117
00:56:28,120 --> 00:56:30,920
Speaker 2: the more you can do to truly learn as much

1118
00:56:30,960 --> 00:56:33,799
Speaker 2: as possible and to put yourself in Like what about

1119
00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:37,480
Speaker 2: imagining an amazing life at forty fifty sixty That might

1120
00:56:37,520 --> 00:56:39,120
Speaker 2: not be about working all the time, But how are

1121
00:56:39,160 --> 00:56:40,600
Speaker 2: you going to get there? Is it going to be

1122
00:56:40,719 --> 00:56:43,239
Speaker 2: jumping ship at twenty three when actually you don't know

1123
00:56:43,600 --> 00:56:47,680
Speaker 2: enough to do that. No, I believe so strongly that

1124
00:56:47,719 --> 00:56:51,239
Speaker 2: we're it's very glamorized online to sell a certain dream

1125
00:56:51,239 --> 00:56:54,760
Speaker 2: around a certain type of career, and actually the best

1126
00:56:54,800 --> 00:57:00,680
Speaker 2: careers are built over time, based on accumulating expertise and contacts,

1127
00:57:01,239 --> 00:57:07,560
Speaker 2: a network overall, and skills and passions, and so focus

1128
00:57:07,640 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 2: on that rather than like a big shiny title or

1129
00:57:11,120 --> 00:57:14,960
Speaker 2: a big move to freelance rather than employed or whatever

1130
00:57:15,000 --> 00:57:17,240
Speaker 2: it might be for your industry. I think that's very

1131
00:57:17,280 --> 00:57:20,640
Speaker 2: important career side, and I think that's often missed. Then

1132
00:57:21,360 --> 00:57:24,680
Speaker 2: on the other side general life, I just think, like,

1133
00:57:24,760 --> 00:57:27,360
Speaker 2: don't let anyone make you feel like you're behind again.

1134
00:57:27,480 --> 00:57:31,480
Speaker 2: We have such a focus on like thirty hunder thirty,

1135
00:57:32,240 --> 00:57:34,680
Speaker 2: you know your life ending, then like all of this,

1136
00:57:34,760 --> 00:57:37,960
Speaker 2: I'm so fucking excited to turn thirty, Like there's so

1137
00:57:38,080 --> 00:57:39,720
Speaker 2: much I'm looking forward to that I just got like,

1138
00:57:39,960 --> 00:57:42,160
Speaker 2: I think this twenties is like a hot pot of

1139
00:57:42,240 --> 00:57:43,480
Speaker 2: kind of just being thrown in there and being like

1140
00:57:43,520 --> 00:57:45,000
Speaker 2: a chieve it's much as possible and like.

1141
00:57:44,960 --> 00:57:47,480
Speaker 1: Find out who you are and like make some friends

1142
00:57:47,520 --> 00:57:49,720
Speaker 1: in that fallen out and get marine and have.

1143
00:57:49,720 --> 00:57:51,400
Speaker 2: A ami and like all of these different things, and

1144
00:57:51,400 --> 00:57:55,120
Speaker 2: it's just like again, life is long, hopefully, and like

1145
00:57:56,440 --> 00:57:59,840
Speaker 2: you're just at the beginning of it. Like, don't let

1146
00:58:00,880 --> 00:58:06,000
Speaker 2: other people's need to rush make you rush. Because I

1147
00:58:06,000 --> 00:58:07,800
Speaker 2: think as well that we have like this warped perception

1148
00:58:07,840 --> 00:58:10,080
Speaker 2: of time. And if you're aiming to do xyzz by thirty,

1149
00:58:10,840 --> 00:58:14,280
Speaker 2: then okay, you get to thirty and then what like

1150
00:58:14,360 --> 00:58:17,320
Speaker 2: what happens? Then don't give yourself that like Olympic gold

1151
00:58:17,320 --> 00:58:20,680
Speaker 2: medal syndrome where you're working towards all these things, or

1152
00:58:20,720 --> 00:58:22,480
Speaker 2: you're like just staying in a relationship because you don't

1153
00:58:22,520 --> 00:58:24,400
Speaker 2: want to be single at thirty, and then you get

1154
00:58:24,440 --> 00:58:26,439
Speaker 2: to thirty. Okay, now what you're pushing for another year

1155
00:58:26,480 --> 00:58:28,640
Speaker 2: and another year and another year and another year. You're

1156
00:58:28,680 --> 00:58:31,200
Speaker 2: only at thirty four, so like as in like start

1157
00:58:31,240 --> 00:58:34,400
Speaker 2: thinking long term and start thinking about like what you

1158
00:58:34,440 --> 00:58:37,480
Speaker 2: actually enjoy and what you want your life to look

1159
00:58:37,560 --> 00:58:40,840
Speaker 2: like rather than what you want other people to perceive

1160
00:58:40,840 --> 00:58:41,320
Speaker 2: it as.

1161
00:58:41,520 --> 00:58:44,400
Speaker 1: Oh I love that advice. Thank you, especially as somebody

1162
00:58:44,400 --> 00:58:47,440
Speaker 1: whose career is dead at thirty. Psychology of your twenty

1163
00:58:47,560 --> 00:58:50,200
Speaker 1: Oh my god, what you to do? I know, I

1164
00:58:50,240 --> 00:58:52,320
Speaker 1: really screwed the proach on that one. Thank you so

1165
00:58:52,440 --> 00:58:56,040
Speaker 1: much for such a wonderful, wonderful advice and such wonderful Canada.

1166
00:58:56,160 --> 00:58:58,840
Speaker 1: You're genuinely just a delightful person to talk to. Thank

1167
00:58:58,840 --> 00:59:01,400
Speaker 1: you so much. That's very kind. How are you? Thanks girl?

1168
00:59:01,720 --> 00:59:04,320
Speaker 1: I honestly think that, like when people have a certain

1169
00:59:04,400 --> 00:59:07,240
Speaker 1: I'm going to give you one more compliment. Are there ready? Yeah? Yeah?

1170
00:59:07,240 --> 00:59:10,200
Speaker 1: Then you can then get out. Yeah. I really do

1171
00:59:10,280 --> 00:59:12,800
Speaker 1: think that, Like you see somebody online and you're like, oh,

1172
00:59:12,800 --> 00:59:15,560
Speaker 1: they seem really nice, and there's always I don't have

1173
00:59:15,600 --> 00:59:17,240
Speaker 1: this feeling, but like there's always the thing of like

1174
00:59:17,240 --> 00:59:18,800
Speaker 1: I wonder if they're like that in real life, And

1175
00:59:18,800 --> 00:59:21,400
Speaker 1: it's like you are somebody I can say for people listening,

1176
00:59:21,440 --> 00:59:24,040
Speaker 1: you're a fan of Grace, like one hundred percent like that,

1177
00:59:24,120 --> 00:59:26,600
Speaker 1: if not better in person that you just have such

1178
00:59:26,600 --> 00:59:29,360
Speaker 1: a You just exude such a brilliance. So I appreciate

1179
00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:31,440
Speaker 1: you coming on the psychology of your twenties. Thank you

1180
00:59:31,480 --> 00:59:33,520
Speaker 1: for having you and the baby, me and the baby,

1181
00:59:33,560 --> 00:59:36,360
Speaker 1: the first baby on the podcast. What do you have

1182
00:59:36,440 --> 00:59:43,720
Speaker 1: to say for yourself? Just acid refo. I'm going to

1183
00:59:43,840 --> 00:59:47,080
Speaker 1: leave everything in the description Where to listen to working hard,

1184
00:59:47,600 --> 00:59:51,640
Speaker 1: Where to buy a piece of Taler's workout gear. I

1185
00:59:51,640 --> 00:59:55,360
Speaker 1: honestly swear by it. Your cinch single it tops, Oh ye,

1186
00:59:55,960 --> 00:59:59,120
Speaker 1: so amazing. I have like three colors brown, black, blue,

1187
00:59:59,520 --> 01:00:03,439
Speaker 1: if you want to by my wardrobe will and uh yeah,

1188
01:00:03,440 --> 01:00:05,760
Speaker 1: everything else that we can find you at. As always, guys,

1189
01:00:05,800 --> 01:00:07,240
Speaker 1: thank you for listening. If you've made it this far,

1190
01:00:07,400 --> 01:00:10,400
Speaker 1: leave a little baby emoji in the Spotify comments down

1191
01:00:10,440 --> 01:00:13,920
Speaker 1: below to wish Grase congratulations and good luck on her

1192
01:00:14,240 --> 01:00:16,520
Speaker 1: on entering impending birth, and I know I didn't want

1193
01:00:16,520 --> 01:00:19,720
Speaker 1: to be like impending birth. And otherwise. You can also

1194
01:00:19,760 --> 01:00:21,840
Speaker 1: watch episodes like this on Netflix. You can follow us

1195
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:23,840
Speaker 1: on Instagram substack. It's all going to be down there,

1196
01:00:23,920 --> 01:00:26,640
Speaker 1: But until next time, be safe, be kind, be gentle

1197
01:00:26,680 --> 01:00:28,640
Speaker 1: to yourself. We will talk very very soon.