Speaker 1: Once upon a time there was a good old traditional housewife,
Speaker 1: and she couldn't. She cleaned and cared for her children
Speaker 1: and the man of the house, and of course she
Speaker 1: didn't talk back.
Speaker 2: She was both obedient and soft by nature.
Speaker 1: She was a good woman who always made good choices.
Speaker 2: We're good Mom's bad choices.
Speaker 3: Who's single mom who said fuck the patriarchy, shared all
Speaker 3: their bad choices.
Speaker 2: And found out they were so bad after all.
Speaker 3: We're experts, overshares and your new besties.
Speaker 2: Sit back and enjoy the ride. Welcome back to good
Speaker 2: Mom's bad Choices. I'm Erica and I'm Jamila.
Speaker 3: Happy Wednesday, bitches, and DJ.
Speaker 2: You love in the house, butes, Is that gonna your
Speaker 2: DJ drop? I have a confession.
Speaker 3: I think I know my next my next adventure, my
Speaker 3: next talent. I'm gonna be a meditation MC. So it's
Speaker 3: like I'm gonna just like talk over the yeah, but
Speaker 3: but like live at a festival. Live, Yeah, everybody, breathe, everybody,
Speaker 3: feel your pleasure, move your hips. I told DJ Niche
Speaker 3: drop some tracks. I'm just send them over. I'm a
Speaker 3: DJ Niche Niche Niche Niche Niche.
Speaker 4: I think I think I think they told me this,
Speaker 4: that you did this at the and on top of
Speaker 4: the mountain the other day.
Speaker 3: I didn't.
Speaker 2: I'm feeling it.
Speaker 3: I think I think I need to do some some
Speaker 3: empty meditation.
Speaker 2: Here goes, Actually do it? Do it? Pick up?
Speaker 3: Just hands me the microphone and then I tell Orlando.
Speaker 2: He's like, right now. I was like, you're a hater.
Speaker 2: Stop in my dreams. So I knew not to fuck
Speaker 2: with you. You're a hater. Meanwhile, as she's like do it,
Speaker 2: do it, she turns it on.
Speaker 4: Oh my god, you know we all need that friend.
Speaker 4: Speaking of friends, did you go out last night?
Speaker 3: I did, But apparently every Wednesday my new friend and
Speaker 3: I met on my hike touring and does his thing,
Speaker 3: except yesterday.
Speaker 2: So we went and we left. So it wasn't this.
Speaker 2: It wasn't the right day. It was the right day.
Speaker 4: He wasn't there that day of always, it wasn't. It
Speaker 4: wasn't like a vibe, No, oh, it was like, what
Speaker 4: was it like in there? It's Anderson Pack's Club or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Andy's.
Speaker 3: I don't want to tell everybody our spot, but Andy's
Speaker 3: on Wednesdays has live music.
Speaker 2: It's really bombed.
Speaker 3: It's really cute in there too. It's like a little bar.
Speaker 3: Apparently it was an upstairs. I didn't know there's upstairs,
Speaker 3: Nisha told me, because you know, Nisha's outside and there's
Speaker 3: a little patio. It's not like some crazy line. It's
Speaker 3: not very La like usual, like who who's the list
Speaker 3: day at?
Speaker 2: Who invited you? It's not like that yet. I don't know.
Speaker 2: I think, I think I don't know. I don't I
Speaker 2: don't know Anderson Pack at all.
Speaker 3: I would imagine his spot would be like I feel
Speaker 3: like he's there. I think he did it on purpose.
Speaker 3: So it's like just very chill like last night. I
Speaker 3: wanted to just let us in last week too, But yeah,
Speaker 3: I was on a hike last week and I was
Speaker 3: just sitting there and this guy we started talking and
Speaker 3: he's like, come to Andy said ten I'm performing. I'm
Speaker 3: like okay, And then I went and it was like amazing.
Speaker 3: I danced for like two hours straight. I don't know
Speaker 3: if anybody's familiar with going out in the LA area Holly, Hollywood, y'all,
Speaker 3: but nobody dances. Historically, nobody dances. It's just not fun.
Speaker 3: There's barely even a dance floor, so it's like, why
Speaker 3: the fuck are we here? So if you find a
Speaker 3: place that people are dancing and there's like good music
Speaker 3: and live music, and then you need to hold on
Speaker 3: to it like a treasure. So this is if I'm
Speaker 3: going to be outside, it's probably going to be on
Speaker 3: a Wednesday at Andy's.
Speaker 2: So, yeah, what happened to you last night? Were you
Speaker 2: going to what'd you guys do?
Speaker 3: Now?
Speaker 2: My homegirls?
Speaker 4: She just came over and we drank tequila and talked
Speaker 4: about girl stuff.
Speaker 2: I went to a stuff life stuff, former stuff.
Speaker 3: I went to an event this week with somebody we
Speaker 3: met at the mom Juice event, and.
Speaker 2: Within like twenty minutes, all.
Speaker 3: The women were gathered around talking about deep stuff. And
Speaker 3: I was like, is this a bitches do?
Speaker 2: Like strangers? Hi? What's your childhood drama?
Speaker 1: Me?
Speaker 2: So, what happened to you? Literally? I was like, is
Speaker 2: this like? Women are so has? Like are just so deep?
Speaker 3: I mean, at least the women I'm around, because within
Speaker 3: literally fifteen minutes, we're just talking about childhood trauma and
Speaker 3: pleasure and like religious trauma. And I'm like, I know
Speaker 3: for a fact men don't gather around in small crowds
Speaker 3: and talk about these things, which is probably the problem. True, Yeah,
Speaker 3: but also I'm like, are we too deep? Also, like
Speaker 3: I don't sometimes you know what it is. I think women,
Speaker 3: I think what's important that we have spaces like that,
Speaker 3: But I also think.
Speaker 2: That we confuse each other because we.
Speaker 4: Can't wait to insert our experience into someone else's experience.
Speaker 4: Like oh, like if I say, oh, I'm going through
Speaker 4: a hard time with my boyfriend, oh girl, I did that.
Speaker 2: I had the same problem, and let me tell you
Speaker 2: how that ended up.
Speaker 4: And then now this bitch on the other side is like,
Speaker 4: oh my god, is that's gonna end up?
Speaker 2: It's like I sometimes I feel like we.
Speaker 4: Plant unnecessary seeds by oversharing, you know, Like I.
Speaker 3: Think it's it just depends who you're asking, who you're
Speaker 3: talking to, and just.
Speaker 2: Well, if you're at a fucking party with a bunch
Speaker 2: of bitches.
Speaker 3: No, I'm basically having discernment of like what information and
Speaker 3: what advice you're you're taking in. And it also depends
Speaker 3: like if it's a yeah, I guess if it's a
Speaker 3: relationship that's early on and not a lot of people
Speaker 3: know that person, or like you know what I mean,
Speaker 3: Like it's it is you have to have the discernment
Speaker 3: because you're the bitch that knows him. If you're getting
Speaker 3: the dick and you're doing the pillow talking, hopefully you
Speaker 3: have a better understanding of this person than like Susie
Speaker 3: Q on the street. I think, I don't know, it's
Speaker 3: a it's a balance because I do feel like you're friends.
Speaker 3: I'm not saying strangers on the street, but like your
Speaker 3: close friends have your best interest in mine and kind
Speaker 3: of know you, and so I feel like their usually
Speaker 3: friend advice is sound. But then there's always you hear
Speaker 3: in like rap videos and songs that like you're getting
Speaker 3: advice from the bitch doesn't have a boyfriend and shit
Speaker 3: like that.
Speaker 2: You know, you know it's been in like E R
Speaker 2: and B song. I'm just gonna say, most bitches don't
Speaker 2: have discernment.
Speaker 4: Did you get bad advice and you're no, I just
Speaker 4: I just no, No, I didn't get bad advice. But
Speaker 4: I you know, I just I think I listen to
Speaker 4: people talk so much, and I listen to women share
Speaker 4: a lot, and I listen to myself too, and I
Speaker 4: have to like sometimes check myself on when someone is
Speaker 4: sharing and not just waiting to insert my experience that
Speaker 4: they've had. You know, I think a lot of times
Speaker 4: we do that because yes, we want to be in
Speaker 4: conversation with someone, like we want to relate to someone,
Speaker 4: and sometimes like you just need to shut the fuck
Speaker 4: up and listen.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean some people just want to a listening ear.
Speaker 3: I also feel like, just in general, as humans, it
Speaker 3: is it is human nature. You share something with me,
Speaker 3: no matter what you're talking about, no matter what I'm
Speaker 3: talking about, even if we're not giving each other advice,
Speaker 3: I'm always because it's the human it's the human nature.
Speaker 3: I'm always going to be looking at looking at said
Speaker 3: thing through a filter of my experience. This is what
Speaker 3: we do. We have a conversation. We are listening aka
Speaker 3: evaluating aka judging aka comparing it to something that you're
Speaker 3: familiar with and feel comfortable with so that we can
Speaker 3: rationalize whatever said thing is. And so automatically there's a
Speaker 3: scope of judgment because even if even as listening, we're
Speaker 3: generally evaluating to respond in a way that's only going
Speaker 3: to have the opinion of something that you've experienced, because
Speaker 3: you're going to make it as close to something you've
Speaker 3: experienced as possible, even if it's not that exact thing,
Speaker 3: because I feel like that's just like the way the
Speaker 3: human brain works realistening. So I always I battle with
Speaker 3: that because like that's kind of like how we how
Speaker 3: we engage in conversation.
Speaker 4: No, I know, I think I think it's I'm not
Speaker 4: saying don't do it, but I think I think the
Speaker 4: person who is the listener also has to have discernment on.
Speaker 2: Who they're sharing this with.
Speaker 4: So like if they know that someone is really impressionable
Speaker 4: and highly influenced, then like, if you really want this
Speaker 4: person to make their own choices and own decisions not
Speaker 4: based on your said experience, that is maybe similar, but
Speaker 4: also everyone's circumstances are different than having the discernment, because
Speaker 4: I know, like there's been times where I've shared things
Speaker 4: with people that I that I feel like my sharing
Speaker 4: discernment was not on point or like irresponsible, and that
Speaker 4: person made a choice that because I said, this is
Speaker 4: what happened to me and this is what I would
Speaker 4: have done.
Speaker 2: Was that the right choice for them? Maybe maybe not?
Speaker 4: You know, like, I think we're also in a society
Speaker 4: that like is because we're so and this is just
Speaker 4: in relationships, because we're so we have so many options
Speaker 4: and we're overstimulated. We're quick to just say fuck it,
Speaker 4: you know, like this isn't serving me. I've definitely been
Speaker 4: in that relation. I've definitely been in that space a lot,
Speaker 4: especially early on in the podcast where when I was
Speaker 4: first dating, where it's like it's not work, it's not
Speaker 4: serving me, it's not serving me, it's not serving me.
Speaker 4: And I've been in relationships where I'm like, okay, and
Speaker 4: maybe you can speak to this even more because you're engaged,
Speaker 4: you've been in a long term relationship, and you're gonna
Speaker 4: get married. There's there has definitely been instances, I'm sure
Speaker 4: in your relationship that maybe you didn't feel like we're
Speaker 4: serving you at the time. But are you gonna leave
Speaker 4: your relationship because it's not serving you in that moment
Speaker 4: or are there other things in the relationship foundationally that
Speaker 4: are sustaining you there where this thing that is not
Speaker 4: serving at the moment is not going to break up
Speaker 4: your relationship.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's why I said the thing about discernment. But honestly,
Speaker 3: this is another thing I feel okay in this relationship.
Speaker 3: Of course, things are there's gonna be things that bother
Speaker 3: me and things and I'm like, fuck this, nigga, fuck
Speaker 3: all this shit.
Speaker 2: I'm blowing it up.
Speaker 3: But at my coreus core, I'm never leaving Orlando, and
Speaker 3: I know that there's nothing anyone could tell me, even
Speaker 3: I think I told one of our friends you just
Speaker 3: got off the phone with and they's like, are you
Speaker 3: going to break up?
Speaker 2: And I was like, no, nigga, I'm just telling you
Speaker 2: a story.
Speaker 3: So I think I've never I've never been in a
Speaker 3: relationship where I've said that or you said it's not
Speaker 3: serving me. No, I've never been in a relationship where
Speaker 3: I've said no, I'm not gonna leave you. And I've
Speaker 3: never been so clear about a relationship that doesn't matter
Speaker 3: what happens that I know I'm not going anywhere and
Speaker 3: he's not going anywhere like that. It's never in my
Speaker 3: friend obviously, in my like my fantasy mind, I'm leaving.
Speaker 2: Him, But I well, I don't want to assume.
Speaker 3: Would you say that part of that is not just
Speaker 3: because you came to that, or part of that is
Speaker 3: because Orlando won't let you leave.
Speaker 2: Not like you're not leave, but there's been times where
Speaker 2: you wanted to run away and he was like a bitch,
Speaker 2: come back.
Speaker 4: You know what I mean, Like it requires sometimes I
Speaker 4: think especially for women who we can be runners and
Speaker 4: like we like I said, there is like a very
Speaker 4: I think it's an important piece for women too, because
Speaker 4: historically women haven't left relationships that haven't served them right,
Speaker 4: Like we've overstayed and so now there's like swinging to
Speaker 4: the other side of the pendulum where bitches are like,
Speaker 4: it's also me, I'm out of out of'm mount.
Speaker 3: Marriage is ending because I'm out of out of mount.
Speaker 4: But there also is a I think a need for
Speaker 4: the other person to sustain, to say you're not leaving me.
Speaker 2: We're going to figure this out.
Speaker 4: If Orlando would have been like, all right, well fuck it,
Speaker 4: then you might have been like, all right, well fuck it.
Speaker 3: Then you know, I try to bring up with this,
Speaker 3: That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 4: So like, because you have a partner that has like
Speaker 4: pulled you back, now perhaps you have now exercised a
Speaker 4: muscle of okay, I'm not gonna leave. Like that isn't
Speaker 4: like your instinct to say.
Speaker 2: All right, well's not working. Oh you don't think it's
Speaker 2: working either, okay, cool?
Speaker 3: Peace is like that's not the stronger muscle anymore, Like
Speaker 3: the stronger muscle is I'm gonna sit here and work
Speaker 3: it out with you, because I know I have someone
Speaker 3: else that is gonna sit here and work it out
Speaker 3: with me too. I think, I think it has a
Speaker 3: lot to do, like we said, like discernment and intuition,
Speaker 3: because I see both sides, and I think generally women know,
Speaker 3: I think generally, in your heart of hearts and your
Speaker 3: gut and your intuition, you know if you should be
Speaker 3: somewhere or not.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And nine times out.
Speaker 3: Of ten it obviously your friends or your the influence
Speaker 3: or the opinions of others can like contribute to how
Speaker 3: you're feeling. But overall, I feel like bitches know when
Speaker 3: they need to get out of something, and generally that
Speaker 3: is the talent, like the thing that make some leave
Speaker 3: when our land those times in the beginning, like early on,
Speaker 3: where I was like, I'm bringing up with a landown.
Speaker 3: He was like, I'll call you back those times, Yes,
Speaker 3: those were important that he say, bitch, have a seat
Speaker 3: and moving through that and I hadn't, I hadn't had
Speaker 3: someone that I in those situations I had. I had
Speaker 3: to ask myself do I still love this person? And
Speaker 3: I did, and I couldn't. I couldn't deny the fact
Speaker 3: that I even though this shit really pissed me off,
Speaker 3: or there's things about you that I don't think I
Speaker 3: can see long term. The reassurance and then having the
Speaker 3: self awareness to ask myself, do I still love this
Speaker 3: person enough to be with them? Was what got me
Speaker 3: through those like those things. But there were times in
Speaker 3: like other relationships, where I was like, I do still
Speaker 3: love this person, and I don't want to be with them.
Speaker 3: I know that I cannot see my life with this
Speaker 3: person in this way, and I think sometimes like women,
Speaker 3: I don't know, Like for instance, like I have I
Speaker 3: have someone close to me who's been in a relationship
Speaker 3: for literally like eight years, and I sometimes feel guilty
Speaker 3: because we went on a trip together and she met
Speaker 3: this crazy ass nigga and moved him in with her
Speaker 3: and he's been there the whole time, and like I
Speaker 3: saw her kid grow eight like this is my cousin
Speaker 3: grow eight years, Like I've just seen her be in
Speaker 3: this cycle, and like I will I'm hi, it's me,
Speaker 3: I'll do it. I'm the friend. I'm like, hey, bitch,
Speaker 3: what's up? Because every time I see you, you're complaining
Speaker 3: and I know this person is literally clinically crazy not medicating.
Speaker 2: So I'm like, I will sometimes I feel like.
Speaker 3: I will be the voice of hey, bitch, you're wasting
Speaker 3: your life. This is you're not getting any younger. Do
Speaker 3: you want to have another kid? Because this is not it? Like,
Speaker 3: I sometimes think it's important to have a friend that's
Speaker 3: going to reiterate the shit that you said that you
Speaker 3: wanted because if it doesn't line up, and you know,
Speaker 3: and I'm sure you can attest to this too. And
Speaker 3: I think I have a sensitivity to this because I
Speaker 3: saw my mom be in a relationship for one hundred
Speaker 3: years too long and literally is just now getting a
Speaker 3: divorce at fifty, you know, eight years old, and I
Speaker 3: see how stunted her growth was. And so when I
Speaker 3: see cycles in my friends or my family, and I'm like.
Speaker 2: Hey, girl, this is crazy.
Speaker 4: What about when you hear about long term marriages that
Speaker 4: went through years of disconnection and then healing, Because like,
Speaker 4: that's what I'm saying, like where they've gone to the
Speaker 4: other side and they're happier than ever, et cetera. There
Speaker 4: probably were people in there that were like, what are
Speaker 4: you doing? You know what I'm saying and that's where, like,
Speaker 4: I think your intuition has to come into place. So
Speaker 4: the people that have stayed in those long term marriages
Speaker 4: something kept them there.
Speaker 2: Right. Well, Well, I'm also like, was it always like this?
Speaker 3: So I think I think women get into relationships and
Speaker 3: then they the same way. The same things that bothered
Speaker 3: them ten years in are the things that existed at
Speaker 3: year one, and they it was early on so it
Speaker 3: didn't bother them as much. But I feel like if
Speaker 3: when you started out, there was something suit that pulled
Speaker 3: you was super like super pulling, there was something that
Speaker 3: like grounded you into this relationship and you know who
Speaker 3: this person is, and then you fall upon disconnected time,
Speaker 3: which is inevitable. If you live with someone, you're changing,
Speaker 3: you're growing, you're working. That's inevitable. But I always come
Speaker 3: back to, well, was there ever passion? Was there ever?
Speaker 2: Intimacy?
Speaker 3: Was there ever reassurance? Like you have to ask yourself realistically,
Speaker 3: because I think women we have been so programmed to
Speaker 3: be like, oh, well this will change or this is
Speaker 3: a nice guy, when in the end, the usually the
Speaker 3: things that break you up are things that already existed
Speaker 3: that you ignored.
Speaker 2: So I think those are important things too.
Speaker 3: But again, like I think everyone should have discerned enough,
Speaker 3: like this is your relationship and your life. And I
Speaker 3: think women don't take enough responsibility for their lives and
Speaker 3: they don't realize like, bitch, this shit is short. Life
Speaker 3: could be over in a blink of an eye. So
Speaker 3: how much are you investing? I think there's such a
Speaker 3: thin line in relationships and how much because women are nurturers.
Speaker 3: We poor, we become, we grow, we water and like,
Speaker 3: so when you were when you know your power, you
Speaker 3: have to be really careful where you're pouring because you
Speaker 3: can if it's not being reciprocated, you will die in
Speaker 3: the process of growing another plant, you know. So I'm like,
Speaker 3: I'm always like, okay, let's go to the beginning. Were
Speaker 3: you getting fucked in the beginning where you're happy? You know,
Speaker 3: were you like, were these issues existing but they weren't
Speaker 3: that bad because it wasn't ten years in. So I
Speaker 3: just think there's a level of like honesty, like brutal
Speaker 3: honesty you have to have with yourself that sometimes women,
Speaker 3: for some reason, we're just people pleasing or whatever.
Speaker 2: We're giving people the benefit of the doubt.
Speaker 3: We just tend not to have, But I don't believe
Speaker 3: in running, but I do believe in Like, I know
Speaker 3: a lot of bitches right now in my friend's circle.
Speaker 3: I wish I could say their names and call those
Speaker 3: hoes out, but that have are just in ridiculous cycles,
Speaker 3: and I'm like, what are you doing?
Speaker 2: What the fuck are you doing?
Speaker 3: Like and I and I and I have balance because
Speaker 3: I have a best friend calls me every other week
Speaker 3: with the same shit, and I'm like, mm hmm, you
Speaker 3: said this. You know you said this last week. You
Speaker 3: know you said you gon to leave them aon line.
Speaker 3: Oh he's back over, Okay, Well, well what do you
Speaker 3: say this?
Speaker 2: Then?
Speaker 3: I'm patient, but I'm always going to be like, you
Speaker 3: know you said this last week and the week before that.
Speaker 3: Are you tired yet? I'm always gonna I try to
Speaker 3: put the court the ball in their court?
Speaker 2: Are you telling?
Speaker 3: Are you tired of this yet? Because this is what
Speaker 3: you you. I'm going to repeat back to me what
Speaker 3: you told me, just for clarity in March, and then
Speaker 3: in April, and then again in June a long more
Speaker 3: time in August you said, you know, and I think
Speaker 3: it's important to like not insert yourself, but to reiterate
Speaker 3: what people are telling you.
Speaker 4: Yeah, no, I think that's what friend I think that's
Speaker 4: what friendships are for.
Speaker 2: But also, do you feel like you talk like.
Speaker 3: I feel like women have a problem of telling the
Speaker 3: bad things but not the good things, Like if you're
Speaker 3: like like like they're always talking about the bad step
Speaker 3: and not the good stuff, Like we forget to celebrate
Speaker 3: our relations.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, that's what we think about.
Speaker 4: Like we think about like you saying you went to
Speaker 4: this conversation with I don't know what you guys talked about,
Speaker 4: but at the event you went to say, it got
Speaker 4: very deep. I don't know if it got very dark, but
Speaker 4: women can get very deep and dark fast. Yeah, like
Speaker 4: real fast, you know, like I think because we like
Speaker 4: I don't know, there's like a we dwell in that space,
Speaker 4: like we create from that space too, so there's like
Speaker 4: a familiarityness. But I I do notice that I noticed
Speaker 4: that about myself too. I think that generally, I feel
Speaker 4: like I read a statistic about this too, Like I
Speaker 4: think generally, No, I think women specifically do not always
Speaker 4: talk about the good parts of their relationship. They keep
Speaker 4: those things to themselves, not even maybe on purpose, but
Speaker 4: maybe like it's just supposed to be, so there's nothing
Speaker 4: to share.
Speaker 3: I feel it feels like cheesy or braggy. I feel
Speaker 3: like women like it's easy. Like I feel like women
Speaker 3: have been told this lie that like the like it's
Speaker 3: more relatable to complain, like, oh, my husband's such an
Speaker 3: asshole like mine too, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2: It's not like, oh my god, you know my man
Speaker 2: did for me today, Like I love this. I love this.
Speaker 3: Think it's so much he's so crazy did the dishes,
Speaker 3: you know, Like it's like we I think, I don't know,
Speaker 3: there's a level of oh, she's bragging or she's like
Speaker 3: doing too much, or she's obsessed or something like that
Speaker 3: that like women, because I feel like I do, like
Speaker 3: I tend to not downplay, but I'm not like I
Speaker 3: have the best husband ever, Like you know, it's just
Speaker 3: I realized that, just in this relationship, that it's just
Speaker 3: so much easier to talk shit than to talk like
Speaker 3: in abundance and positivity.
Speaker 2: And I'm just wondering, what is that and.
Speaker 3: What can we do to like switch that, Yeah, shift
Speaker 3: that in our friendships and our and in the circles
Speaker 3: of like our conversation because I think that's important.
Speaker 4: No, I think that's I think that is important too,
Speaker 4: because I think whenever someone asks you, so, how's Brian.
Speaker 2: Like, you're gonna like maybe sprinkle a little positive. Just
Speaker 2: got a new job.
Speaker 4: But girl, you know, like that's because there is it's
Speaker 4: like I don't want to sound too braggadocious, or maybe
Speaker 4: we can relate more on this level because you're not
Speaker 4: in a relationship, so like I want to really to
Speaker 4: you where maybe like there's something negative happening in your
Speaker 4: you know, like I don't know, but why do.
Speaker 3: We think that negativity is the common place of relatability
Speaker 3: for some reason?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, I think I don't know. We gotta work
Speaker 2: on that, ladies.
Speaker 3: I mean yeah, because I and I think just in general,
Speaker 3: I read this and for those that are doing fucking
Speaker 3: keep going, tell your friends.
Speaker 2: I mean. But also I think.
Speaker 3: I remember that girl online she's getting high that we
Speaker 3: got annoyed withent because she got that boyfriend, and she
Speaker 3: would have shut the fuck up about it, that one
Speaker 3: you loved it loved to hat online. And then there's
Speaker 3: sometimes I'm like, you know what, I think there's also
Speaker 3: an underlying thing about like women breaking up, no, like women.
Speaker 2: Being so desperate, like I want a man so bad when.
Speaker 3: My husband, Like, I believe in manifesting what you want,
Speaker 3: but I don't believe in forcing it. I believe, like
Speaker 3: I think I wrote this in my notes, This was
Speaker 3: a good one. What did I say? Oh, I said,
Speaker 3: desperation reads.
Speaker 2: Well.
Speaker 4: I think there's a difference between desperation and doing what
Speaker 4: you just said, which is like talking positively about your
Speaker 4: partner or your partner that's on the way, and being
Speaker 4: like I want my man, well my mom man gets here,
Speaker 4: he's gonna be dead. Da da da he We're gonna
Speaker 4: do dad d Like there's nothing wrong with that.
Speaker 3: Like Rosa who wrote who's writing letters to her husband?
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think.
Speaker 4: I mean, I'll even admit, like maybe I was triggered
Speaker 4: by that girl because I wanted something that she that
Speaker 4: she had, even though it was a little corny, even
Speaker 4: though she's just you know what I'm saying, But at
Speaker 4: at its core, like that shouldn't really bother me, you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, why then there's a question why is it bothering?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: I think I think for me, I just was. It's
Speaker 4: more so like I think about the I'm always thinking
Speaker 4: about the end. I'm like, damn, I'm gonna have to
Speaker 4: lead all those photos, all those sunset reels of eating
Speaker 4: oysters by the water and the rose petals to the beach.
Speaker 4: And but then it's like, well, but like that's her
Speaker 4: fucking life and its right, you know. So I think
Speaker 4: a lot of times when we feel triggered by what
Speaker 4: we see on Instagram, yes there's the discernment of us
Speaker 4: knowing like okay, bitch, like this is not for real,
Speaker 4: and then also like okay, well I kind of I
Speaker 4: want that. I kind of want that. I want that
Speaker 4: to be for real for me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Unfortunately update they broke up. It
Speaker 2: didn't work out, ended up.
Speaker 4: Not working out. My dream couple. Ye, dream moneration couple
Speaker 4: didn't work out. But you know, she's she's you know,
Speaker 4: she's a boss bitch. She'll figure it out.
Speaker 2: You know.
Speaker 3: I've never been the type of bit like I'll delete
Speaker 3: like if there's an overload, but I'll leave a couple
Speaker 3: for memories.
Speaker 2: I really will.
Speaker 3: If you scroll back and them, you'll see every scene
Speaker 3: I forget to hide.
Speaker 2: And think I hit everything. I hide everything.
Speaker 3: I maybe, but there's you'll see some niggas that got
Speaker 3: got kept on there by mistake, just because I said,
Speaker 3: this is what happened, and you see the jerks.
Speaker 4: The only time it doesn't get deleted is a I
Speaker 4: look really good and I'm like this. I think there
Speaker 4: is one photo of an ex that where you just
Speaker 4: see his mouth and like below and I was like, an,
Speaker 4: I'm in the photo and I look really good, and
Speaker 4: it's my birthday, so this is going to stay up.
Speaker 4: This is an important image. It's the only picture of
Speaker 4: my birthday.
Speaker 2: So what has to day?
Speaker 3: I guess it's just like we're human, We're gonna something
Speaker 3: is gonna stick around. Some are and we're also human
Speaker 3: and we're stupid. So we've decided to record every single
Speaker 3: detail and oyster beachside oyster of date of our lives.
Speaker 2: So yeah, this is where we're at now.
Speaker 4: So including our sex tapes and our hidden folders, like
Speaker 4: at any time that at any moment could be retrieved
Speaker 4: by the government anyway, what do you mean the government
Speaker 4: just you know, there's just no boundaries. We can anything
Speaker 4: can happen. I don't think that.
Speaker 2: I don't they can retrieve our photos from the iCloud.
Speaker 2: What is the fucking iCloud?
Speaker 4: At this point, they're buying. They're buying everything. They're buying TikTok,
Speaker 4: they're about to go out by.
Speaker 2: Not about that.
Speaker 3: Like I started getting is when they feed me certain
Speaker 3: jokes about illegal things, and like, are they making a
Speaker 3: profile on me my porn searches, like the secret memes
Speaker 3: I send people like they're making a profile, like drinks
Speaker 3: tequila goes to the bar, she hates the government.
Speaker 2: They're literally there's a profile.
Speaker 3: They're like, she likes she likes this kind of porn,
Speaker 3: telling you it's like the book The Circle.
Speaker 2: Read the book the fucking stressed out in it.
Speaker 4: Anyway, is there time for bad choice of the week?
Speaker 4: She we have a bad choice of the week submission bad.
Speaker 1: Mom, not a bad mom, but a bad mom so good.
Speaker 2: This is from a OG.
Speaker 3: Listener shout out to I'm going to keep you anonymous,
Speaker 3: but you know who you are.
Speaker 2: A baby. Her bad choice of the week is left
Speaker 2: the baby with.
Speaker 4: Grandma, so me and the wife could eat molly and
Speaker 4: have sex in the forest.
Speaker 3: I think I know who this is. Do they live
Speaker 3: in this state?
Speaker 2: Molly?
Speaker 4: What this says Molly and shoots in the forest? What
Speaker 4: does mean have shoots like photo shoots?
Speaker 2: Well, I did see a picture, so I don't know.
Speaker 2: I think of like mushroom shoots. I don't know.
Speaker 4: Yeah, this is an excellent choice. I love doing Molly
Speaker 4: and Shoots in the store in the forest.
Speaker 3: Molly in the Forest sounds like really fun.
Speaker 2: I want it's a pretty magical camp again camp. Yeah,
Speaker 2: camping was really fun. Yeah, I would.
Speaker 3: I would go to Joshua Tree, or we could just
Speaker 3: go Joshua Tree and stay in a nice house.
Speaker 4: I would go yirding, you know, I'm go yirding. So
Speaker 4: it's like a substantial tent. That's bit they built it.
Speaker 4: There's maybe a flooring underneath.
Speaker 2: There's canvas, but there's maybe camp or yeah, you know.
Speaker 4: Yeah, if I had to get down on my knees
Speaker 4: and get into the tent, I would if I had to,
Speaker 4: But I don't have to.
Speaker 2: I don't want to.
Speaker 3: Can we can we be really madice at this, but
Speaker 3: can we podcast in the wild and go camping? Yeah?
Speaker 2: You could? You need to bring back.
Speaker 3: Podcasting in the wild. This is a question for you
Speaker 3: to the people.
Speaker 2: Yeah, do we? I mean it was it was fun.
Speaker 2: It's fun.
Speaker 4: If you haven't checked out our podcasting in the wild,
Speaker 4: would you call it a.
Speaker 2: Segment a.
Speaker 3: Series called Podcasting in the Wild at the top of
Speaker 3: this year, right last last year?
Speaker 2: Yeah, not this year, last year, last year. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Sure, And we went to a soul food restaurant. We
Speaker 3: got botox and very important, very important content.
Speaker 2: The mountain.
Speaker 3: We walked through Santa Monica.
Speaker 2: Where else did we do? We went to my mom's house.
Speaker 2: We did go to your mom's house. Yeah, we laid
Speaker 2: by the pool.
Speaker 3: Actually, this was great. This We might need to bring
Speaker 3: that back. I'm sick of I mean, I love the studio,
Speaker 3: but maybe we need a new couch. But dms, if
Speaker 3: you think we should go back to the wild because
Speaker 3: I want to go camping or maybe the Joshua Tree,
Speaker 3: which is kind of the same thing.
Speaker 2: Do you have camping gear?
Speaker 1: Like?
Speaker 2: Do you have all the things that we're gonna are
Speaker 2: you gonna know? I brought it from David. Oh, David,
Speaker 2: do you have a grilled You have a grilled day?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: My god, we need to you have a whole kit?
Speaker 2: He did?
Speaker 3: I think we lost We lost the top to his tent,
Speaker 3: so he may not ever let us borrow anything.
Speaker 2: Ever, how did you lose the top? To know?
Speaker 3: We had one from Nisha one from him and then
Speaker 3: they I think we have it. Just there's so many
Speaker 3: there's so many bags. Like the only thing about camping.
Speaker 3: I went with like seventy five people. It was insane,
Speaker 3: but it was a lot of work. Like I felt
Speaker 3: like a nature bitch, like peeing outside, like going up hills,
Speaker 3: like going in the water in the morning and brushing it.
Speaker 2: It just feels very nature. I don't know, I'm really immersed,
Speaker 2: you know. And I did it for five days.
Speaker 3: That's in an island like you couldn't get to.
Speaker 2: I mean, there wasn't an island. That must have felt
Speaker 2: really good for your nervous system. Yeah, to sleep outside
Speaker 2: of me.
Speaker 3: At the end, I was like, okay, this is a
Speaker 3: small last ten I've been on the ground for five days.
Speaker 3: But those first four day yeah, three and a half, yeah, half,
Speaker 3: I was like, wow, we're fourth morning.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I went camping and Montana. It was beautiful. I
Speaker 2: know you did that thing right. It was so beautiful.
Speaker 4: It was such a like important experience, and I think
Speaker 4: every person should take, no matter what age.
Speaker 3: Should we do a good mom's gone camping family trip.
Speaker 2: Oh, good mom's gone camping like that.
Speaker 3: I like that good mom's gone camping could be a
Speaker 3: whole family trip.
Speaker 2: We meet.
Speaker 3: I have an idea to go exactly where I went. Okay,
Speaker 3: and this we contribute. We all bring well, yeah, we'll
Speaker 3: we'll provide the food. Papa oh will barbecue it. We'll
Speaker 3: have a fire.
Speaker 2: It'll be fun.
Speaker 3: We'll sing camp songs to the window, to the wall.
Speaker 4: When I did when I went into a on a
Speaker 4: ship camp like we were on like a pirate ship.
Speaker 2: We learned pirate songs. I forgot.
Speaker 3: You told me that. And Martha Stewart right vineyard, Martha
Speaker 3: Steward and Martha Stewart. You couldn't tell me that Martha's
Speaker 3: vineyard wasn't Martha Stewart.
Speaker 2: I thought it was just.
Speaker 3: Her property, like that was her property, and we're going
Speaker 3: to go see Martha.
Speaker 2: That's a whole other Martha.
Speaker 4: Martha's yeah, right, same vibes Martha's. Martha's mineyard might have
Speaker 4: inspired Martha Stewart her aesthetic.
Speaker 2: And Martha's a bad bitch. Fucking love her, God, I
Speaker 2: really do.
Speaker 3: She's vicious. She is vicious, She's fierce, She's can Martha
Speaker 3: Stewart come? I think I damned her and no one
Speaker 3: else wanted who Martha Stewart.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we need to just you know, we need to
Speaker 2: put a list together, write them down. We have a
Speaker 2: list together. We need to have it on the wall
Speaker 2: right there.
Speaker 3: Maybe we need to put it in the middle and
Speaker 3: like masturbate close to each other and then.
Speaker 2: And then they'll call us.
Speaker 4: She kem asked me the day, He's like, what would
Speaker 4: mean one thing that would make you feel like you've
Speaker 4: made it? And I was like, Eric abaud do on
Speaker 4: my show and he was like, are you serious? Like,
Speaker 4: I'm dead ass serious, I'm dead ass serious.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 4: Wait, did you see the thing I sent you about
Speaker 4: the Chelsea Handler scam?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, we saw it. We got scammed.
Speaker 3: We got scammed by Chelsea Handler. Guys, we were scammed.
Speaker 3: I was so mad.
Speaker 2: I still it really made.
Speaker 4: My fucking day. We sent it to the group chat.
Speaker 4: That's how serious this this scam was.
Speaker 2: We emailed us.
Speaker 3: Chelsea can you come on the show because Sammed, it's
Speaker 3: not your fault or anything, but I just think it
Speaker 3: would be a great collab and we can we can ski,
Speaker 3: we can smoke.
Speaker 2: Did you see the comment I wrote her? What you say?
Speaker 4: I said, we were a product of your scamming and
Speaker 4: I was like, we got really fucking excited, so can
Speaker 4: you just come on the show. We can't wait to
Speaker 4: ski down mountains with our tits out.
Speaker 3: I was gonna see it, so anyway, eventually someone's gonna see.
Speaker 2: There's a lot of scam.
Speaker 4: When she broke down that scam, it made me think
Speaker 4: of the other scam we're.
Speaker 2: Also called scam.
Speaker 3: Yeah, people are scamming us right now, we're getting scammed.
Speaker 2: Do we look like we should? Everyone else getting scammed?
Speaker 3: But I really look like I don't feel like my
Speaker 3: face says scam me. I feel like I say fuck off.
Speaker 2: I don't know.
Speaker 4: I don't think they give a fuck what you look like.
Speaker 4: It's just anyone who get scammed out here.
Speaker 2: Wait, let me tell you.
Speaker 3: We're in Costa Rica and we get offered like about
Speaker 3: like a couple thousand dollars. It just seemed too good
Speaker 3: to be true to do a pot live podcast. And
Speaker 3: then we look at it and it's like a Christian
Speaker 3: We're like, are they are they fucking with us? It
Speaker 3: was like a very black Christian woman and she was
Speaker 3: a real person. My cousin, my Christian cousin, was following her.
Speaker 3: I'm like, who's this, and she I was like, do
Speaker 3: you think that this is real? She's like, probably not
Speaker 3: because because she don't be talking about what you'll be
Speaker 3: talking about. And I was Me and Erica really had
Speaker 3: to have a serious conversation with it with ourselves, like
Speaker 3: I don't think she's reaching out to us.
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 4: I don't think it's really it's not. We're not doing this.
Speaker 4: Come to find out, people are scamming you for your Facebook.
Speaker 2: Then we got in the call.
Speaker 3: So it's like a black woman in DC and we
Speaker 3: get in the call and it's like an englishman ausy
Speaker 3: like yeah, yeah, so she just does a Facebook live
Speaker 3: and we're like what he I think he knew we
Speaker 3: were on to him, so he was like, let me follow.
Speaker 2: I was just like, why would this Christian black woman
Speaker 2: asking many questions. I was like, because we're not stupid.
Speaker 2: I don't have scammed me.
Speaker 3: On my face, but but the money almost scammed me.
Speaker 3: I know, crazy, what money will do?
Speaker 2: I know?
Speaker 3: I was like yeah, I was like Eric Canty slaves.
Speaker 3: So this was like Eric, no, yeah, I know. I'm
Speaker 3: glad we didn't fall for those who.
Speaker 2: Were too smart. Our intuition are spidey isn't too strong.
Speaker 3: We've done lives where we got paid easily and it
Speaker 3: wasn't a scam, so I understand, but it didn't seems.
Speaker 2: I mean, I really believe.
Speaker 3: Chelseat watch out people. I believe Chelsea handler that really.
Speaker 4: But you know what, I'm glad that she spoke. Thank you, Chelsea,
Speaker 4: because we were waiting still. I was gonna wait forever.
Speaker 2: Literally, I was gonna wait.
Speaker 4: I was willing to wait forever. Now I know I
Speaker 4: just have to keep trying follow back up. At least
Speaker 4: now I know I'm gonna start dming you again, and
Speaker 4: you know, we'll start there again.
Speaker 3: I feel like we're gonna I'm gonna see her like
Speaker 3: in La somewhere in an event, and I'm just gonna
Speaker 3: pull up.
Speaker 2: Like, hey, do you want to take a shot? Yeah?
Speaker 2: I know, I do. I know you do. Come on? Also,
Speaker 2: do you want to come on my podcast? Yeah? That's
Speaker 2: what I feel like. It's going to be a run in.
Speaker 2: It's going to be a running situation. You know what.
Speaker 3: We're not in a good season for podcasts, Like it
Speaker 3: doesn't sound cool. There's so many podcasts if you like,
Speaker 3: slide up next to someone and they don't know you're
Speaker 3: got to part and you're like, hey, do you want
Speaker 3: to go on my podcast?
Speaker 2: They're like, you know, like next to the wrong girl
Speaker 2: at the party.
Speaker 4: No, you gotta just be you gotta be people's friends.
Speaker 4: You gotta be cool, be people's friends. You actually might
Speaker 4: have to get to know Chelsea hand the first.
Speaker 3: Oh, I feel like we are going to be really
Speaker 3: good friends. That's like half the reason that I should
Speaker 3: go on your show.
Speaker 2: Yeah, she probably already seen us. Most people have seen us. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Does that sound bragadocis No, it's the internet. See.
Speaker 4: I think we just have to be honest with ourselves
Speaker 4: and speak even if most people haven't seen us.
Speaker 2: Now and you're gonna see us. You can see us.
Speaker 2: You will see us. You see us? Do you see us?
Speaker 2: Recognize us? Listen to us? Look at this face? Do
Speaker 2: you see me? Remember? I see you? I see you,
Speaker 2: I see you? You see me? I really see you?
Speaker 2: I see you too? Do you see me? I see
Speaker 2: how do I look? You look great? Great? Oh my god?
Speaker 2: They say, I know. Wait, we had some horries. Oh
Speaker 2: the bad choices.
Speaker 3: Oh I named one, I did one, I read one.
Speaker 3: Oh it was our og listeners. Oh right, I'm high
Speaker 3: speaking of bad choices. Last week, we had a caller,
Speaker 3: I mean a caller, yeah, rite someone write in and
Speaker 3: he said he gave another bitch some money. Even has
Speaker 3: a girlfriend, and I I said how much money? And
Speaker 3: so we followed up, and I thought that we should
Speaker 3: let you guys know, because when she messaged me, I
Speaker 3: was pissed, like I was the girlfriend.
Speaker 2: How much was it? Eighteen hundred? Eighteen fucking hundreds?
Speaker 3: I found out my man gave another bitch eighteen hundred dollars.
Speaker 2: I told you last week.
Speaker 3: I get mad at my man gave him bitch twenty dollars.
Speaker 3: Why the fuck are you sending this bitch twenty dollars
Speaker 3: for one drink?
Speaker 4: I mean wait, wait he said. I said, do better, sir.
Speaker 4: I responded, you were pissed. I said, do better, sir.
Speaker 4: He said no, because the other girl was into pegging
Speaker 4: men and my girl is not.
Speaker 2: That's the full update.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, let's talk about this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was Yeah.
Speaker 3: Women, I feel like, well, obviously he's asked her and
Speaker 3: she said no, Well then maybe you need to flip,
Speaker 3: like if that's something you need in the relationship.
Speaker 4: Wait, this person is following two thousand people, but only
Speaker 4: has five followers, and it's like a hidden like it's
Speaker 4: like a secret page.
Speaker 2: Let mess ite like, do I know this person?
Speaker 3: Is it your crazy stalker? Who the one who's emailing everybody?
Speaker 2: Is it? Maybe? He emailed me again? He responded, He
Speaker 2: responded to this, Actually.
Speaker 3: That's one who said he gave someone.
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't believe it. Why you thought because
Speaker 2: it's not a real page the stalker? I mean, people
Speaker 2: are weird. I feel like it's someone different.
Speaker 3: We've had some pretty interesting online relationships in the DMS.
Speaker 2: We are wait live update. Are you ready?
Speaker 4: I just opened INSTAGRAMA Cardi B just snatched a getting
Speaker 4: snatched a Guinness World record after selling the most signed
Speaker 4: items in eight hours for who for I.
Speaker 2: Am the Drama.
Speaker 3: She's the most signed items in eight hours? She set
Speaker 3: the record. Her hand is she okay? She likes shit,
Speaker 3: I'm pregnant. Let me sit down and break some records
Speaker 3: and makes something to drink. Yeah, us, it's fine.
Speaker 2: Why would they have a sign?
Speaker 3: I love her? This is just feeding into the am
Speaker 3: I the Drama. This is this is this is excellent marketing.
Speaker 2: Did you see the best market I've ever seen? In
Speaker 2: the video, I said to you. She was like, he oh,
Speaker 2: baby daddy, my baby daddy too.
Speaker 3: I'm stopping it out. They're making mac and cheese for kids.
Speaker 3: Maybe daddy on me too. She's like, oh, well, and congratulations,
Speaker 3: you're right.
Speaker 2: Ship.
Speaker 3: She is over here setting Guinness World Records for random
Speaker 3: ship because she is, in fact the drama and I
Speaker 3: fucking love it. Can We said, is there something we
Speaker 3: got to think of? Something random to sead of Guinness
Speaker 3: reel records. I could just add that to my list
Speaker 3: of like, what's something like?
Speaker 2: Uh, I on a podcast? Do you have a podcast?
Speaker 3: I'm on the Guinness World Records for sucking the most
Speaker 3: lollipops in twenty minutes and.
Speaker 2: Get in get into the gam fastest. Hurry me, like,
Speaker 2: go harder, harder. Look at I've eaten.
Speaker 3: I may I've sucked a blow pop to the gum
Speaker 3: the fastest in all history of America.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. The apple flavor? Is that your favorite? Yeah?
Speaker 2: That is a good flavor. I like the apple flavor.
Speaker 2: I like blow pops. I don't like titsy pops.
Speaker 4: I don't want tisty pops either. That that goes together
Speaker 4: first of all, Yeah, that filling is not it it
Speaker 4: tastes like what a motherfucking owl would want to eat
Speaker 4: some fucking some bullshit.
Speaker 2: I like apple Jolly, I like Jolly ranchers. I also like,
Speaker 2: what are those airheads? My god, is so sour?
Speaker 4: Like this, the long ones that they're like, oh, oh,
Speaker 4: you know what I'm talking about, right, those little airhead balls,
Speaker 4: like they're like you suck.
Speaker 2: On them, and they're super super sour. They're called sour
Speaker 2: sour heads. Sourheads. They're not sour. E didn't try as
Speaker 2: an adult. They're like a little sour. Are some of
Speaker 2: these candies retired never to be eaten again? No, there's
Speaker 2: so there. We could like find them on the internet. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Maybe we're talking like this because Halloween, our favorite season,
Speaker 3: is coming up.
Speaker 2: It's a coming. Oh, by the way, do you know
Speaker 2: what you're gonna be for Halloween?
Speaker 3: I was actually thinking about running back the costume really
Speaker 3: actually I have me and Orlando have one that's I'm
Speaker 3: really excited about.
Speaker 2: What is it? I can't tell you why? What the fuck?
Speaker 3: It's not gonna be as fun. Oh okay, that's what
Speaker 3: we're at. Whoa we're not I'm sharing Halloween costumes together?
Speaker 2: Wow? Well, this is just one.
Speaker 3: We're gonna have like we should have five, Okay.
Speaker 2: Just get away. I seen the movie, so it doesn't
Speaker 2: even fucking matter, is yes? Oh yeah, I can't, like,
Speaker 2: how are we even? I watched some of it.
Speaker 4: I fall asleep. You know, TV turns like my brain off.
Speaker 4: So I'll try again.
Speaker 2: I'll try again. This is for the yeah. Oh.
Speaker 3: Also, I don't know if I told you that I
Speaker 3: bought us tickets to the Craft Hollywood Cemetery.
Speaker 2: Thank God, What day is that? I don't know. It's
Speaker 2: in my It's in October. It's in my phone. You
Speaker 2: gotta look for it. Light up. Yeah, if you.
Speaker 3: Guys are in the LA area Hollywood, we meet us
Speaker 3: at Hollywood Cemetery to watch the Craft. I don't know
Speaker 3: if you guys are just joining us. But October the fall,
Speaker 3: we just hit the fall equinox. This is our season
Speaker 3: outside of Hot Girls Summer, which is my birthday.
Speaker 2: Scary spooky witch season. Fall is our other spooky bitch witch. Yeah,
Speaker 2: scoop spooky witchat up the Brew.
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is our other timer, Like I don't know,
Speaker 3: it's going to watch scary movies and buy skeletons and
Speaker 3: do spooky shit and eat soup even though it's eighty
Speaker 3: seven degrees and it's important.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 4: I was just I was just saying that I wish
Speaker 4: it would be. I was like, can it just be
Speaker 4: like sixty seven today? I just need it to be
Speaker 4: a nice sixty seven. I can wear a hoodie if
Speaker 4: it's gloomy in the morning. Need be it's like cool
Speaker 4: enough in LA, but not hot and left to make
Speaker 4: me sweat in a sweatshirt.
Speaker 3: It will probably be baser until February here.
Speaker 2: Is that sweatshirt season anywhere else? Definitely? I don't know,
Speaker 2: but with like global warming, maybe not.
Speaker 4: Well, you know what my friend who came over was
Speaker 4: basically said, by twenty fifty, like LA basically only like Sweden, Denmark,
Speaker 4: Canada all these other countries are going to be the
Speaker 4: last man standing because everything else is going to like
Speaker 4: be so hot and unlivable below.
Speaker 3: The equator in twenty five years. Yeah, like soon, you
Speaker 3: know when you tell me things like that. And then
Speaker 3: I said, the rocking was also last week, and I
Speaker 3: think working out.
Speaker 2: We don't we really don't even want to live to
Speaker 2: one hundred. What are we working out?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Why are we even? Like because because like I honestly,
Speaker 2: one hundred might be pushing it. Working at first feels good.
Speaker 2: We just have to reframe.
Speaker 3: Working out doesn't have to be going to the gym,
Speaker 3: you know, moving our bodies.
Speaker 2: And this shit really blowed down. That's an option also,
Speaker 2: I think we should.
Speaker 4: Can we find a balance between like in the middle,
Speaker 4: so that like by the time we die, where our
Speaker 4: bodies are not in bad.
Speaker 2: How long Ozzie Osborne lived. It's rare though.
Speaker 4: There's a few people that preserve by drug, you know,
Speaker 4: like there's people created to preserve by drug. He's one
Speaker 4: of them.
Speaker 3: I feel like, what's the other guy.
Speaker 4: Mick Jagger is one of them? Like there's some people
Speaker 4: that have preserved by drugs.
Speaker 2: Like the alcohol has for mel to hide at their
Speaker 2: body like.
Speaker 4: Yay Yang twins. Like these are a few people that
Speaker 4: have preserved. Trick Daddy, I mean, rest in peace. But
Speaker 4: like you, Trick Daddy, Trick Dady is not dead. Oh wait,
Speaker 4: never mind, He's like.
Speaker 2: Why would you kill what the fuck you sick bitch?
Speaker 2: I didn't know. I thought he died. Maybe it's a'm I.
Speaker 3: Thinking, I don't know, Notady, wrong, you are killing Oliver,
Speaker 3: all of our legenes Okay, who's the like this coolioh Okay,
Speaker 3: sorry Coolio.
Speaker 4: He died, Yeah, he died. That's what I was thinking
Speaker 4: about for trick Daddy the braids. But no, trick Daddy
Speaker 4: did not die.
Speaker 2: But trick Daddy was looking like he was about to die.
Speaker 2: He was looking yad, he's nice. Think he has some
Speaker 2: kind of Oh my pad.
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, very very very very sorry, trick Daddy, I hope.
Speaker 3: And then there's Chaer who got young Dick to preserve her.
Speaker 3: I think it's the black young Dick. There are vampires
Speaker 3: among us, and we are watching them like shares of vampire.
Speaker 2: Christian is a vampire.
Speaker 4: Like we see how they become youthful with like melanated there.
Speaker 4: I feel like there's living vampires and there we see them.
Speaker 4: They like culture vulture from society, but they're kind of likable.
Speaker 4: They're getting younger somehow, they're getting younger and more successful
Speaker 4: and richer.
Speaker 2: They're literally vampires period.
Speaker 3: There's organ harvesting, there's a lot, there's sex traffickings in
Speaker 3: all time.
Speaker 2: I there's a lot of crazy shit. You know what.
Speaker 3: I realized, we're gonna have to talk all of our
Speaker 3: crazy me all of our crazy conspiracy theory things on Patreon.
Speaker 3: You can say like full sentences and we should just
Speaker 3: not get scared and like censored and maybe they're gonna
Speaker 3: come for us.
Speaker 2: So maybe I don't know. No, I think you're right.
Speaker 2: I think I was not about that. I can't even
Speaker 2: speak freely. I'm scared, you know. Sweet.
Speaker 4: After last week's episode, David comes in, he goes, what word?
Speaker 4: And I was thinking, like, how many people last week
Speaker 4: are like, what is the c K word?
Speaker 2: I'm like, y'all don't know what the K word is?
Speaker 3: I think they know it was only David because he
Speaker 3: lives under rock. Oh, they speaking of censorship. They brought
Speaker 3: Jimmy Kimble back, right, What did you think about that?
Speaker 4: I'm still unsubscribed even though my account goes told.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I told I like, had this whole
Speaker 2: talk with ire. I was like, saturd down. I was like, honey,
Speaker 2: we're going to delete Disney. We're deleting Disney. Honey, it's
Speaker 2: so breaking every child. I literally had this conversation with her.
Speaker 4: I sat down with her because I was like, I
Speaker 4: didn't want to just delete it and be like because
Speaker 4: I said's out.
Speaker 2: You know, I was going to do that too. I mean,
Speaker 2: you're got to tell this.
Speaker 4: So I was like, so listen, we're deleting Disney, like
Speaker 4: free speech is under attack and we can't, like we
Speaker 4: have to start making these uncomfortable choices household and get
Speaker 4: used to it. That what like it's it's going to
Speaker 4: be required of us in this time, in a season
Speaker 4: of everybody wants to be comfortable.
Speaker 2: What is she said, and she said.
Speaker 4: But why She's like, mom, but why and then and
Speaker 4: then I said, because we have to. And then she
Speaker 4: said okay. She didn't really push back. I was like,
Speaker 4: all right, So I deleted it all proud of myself.
Speaker 4: And it was like your subscription ends like November first,
Speaker 4: because you just paid four days ago or some shit.
Speaker 4: I was like, okay, well we still have it, but
Speaker 4: I'm not going to resubscribe to it.
Speaker 2: I don't know, Like we talked about this before, about.
Speaker 4: Like protesting and like you know, just the impact of
Speaker 4: like when then when the DEI stuff happened, and like
Speaker 4: seeing the impact has had on target and like if
Speaker 4: we did that more and it was a more collective effort,
Speaker 4: like the influence we have, not just black people, humans
Speaker 4: in general have over capitalism, which is really what runs America.
Speaker 4: But because they've groomed us to always need to be
Speaker 4: in comfort, it's so inconvenient, you know, and so and
Speaker 4: it feels like that what's my thing going to do?
Speaker 4: What's one what's one thing going to do? So now
Speaker 4: we see what it does, and we continue to see
Speaker 4: what it does, and hopefully like things happen in move
Speaker 4: because of it, and people I don't know, like I
Speaker 4: hope that people don't resubscribe, although like there are you know,
Speaker 4: it's it's going to impact people that have nothing to
Speaker 4: do with this, you know, like the Avid elementaries like
Speaker 4: that were loved, like talking about like people have created
Speaker 4: who create creations on these channels, you know, the access,
Speaker 4: it's the access it's given communities like ours to like
Speaker 4: ribe and with so it's like, but I feel like
Speaker 4: things some people have to be casualties.
Speaker 2: Okay, elementary can go anywhere. And that's what I was saying,
Speaker 2: and that's what I was saying about Jimmy Kimmel.
Speaker 3: I was like, so are we resubscribing or are we encouraging.
Speaker 2: People like Jimmy? I feel like creators to go create
Speaker 2: their people anymore. I don't be very I don't see
Speaker 2: these channels anymore.
Speaker 3: When he came with his speech, and I granted he cried,
Speaker 3: I'm sure it was very emotional when he's like, what
Speaker 3: the fuck I just lost my job overnight and having
Speaker 3: an after a job for having you know, twenty years.
Speaker 3: But I think that it's a little bit manufactured. I
Speaker 3: think now he is going to be.
Speaker 2: His comeback was manufactured. Did you watch it? I just
Speaker 2: heard it. Yeah, I saw like a monologue. Yeah, it
Speaker 2: was his monologue and he cried and he cried. Yeah,
Speaker 2: oh I'm as that. Yeah, and what does he cry about?
Speaker 3: He never meant to make make light of somebody's death.
Speaker 4: Has he ever done that before? I'm just wondering if
Speaker 4: he's ever made a light of anyone's set before. And
Speaker 4: it wasn't the big I'm pretty sure. And but he
Speaker 4: wasn't making light of the guy's death.
Speaker 2: I know it.
Speaker 4: I mean he was talking about the guy's death in
Speaker 4: relation to it not being of Trump's priority at all.
Speaker 2: I was really saying that he wasn't really concerned. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but I don't know.
Speaker 3: I feel like when you work for those big conglomerates
Speaker 3: news news outlets, radio, like it's no secret, you guys,
Speaker 3: that everything is orchestrated to you know, control the masses.
Speaker 3: It's not like, it's not rocket science. And I think
Speaker 3: that you have to always consider that there's a level
Speaker 3: of censorship that you know, if I say this was
Speaker 3: my fucking job, right, and because they just showed you
Speaker 3: last week, so you're going to tread lightly, you know.
Speaker 2: It's like, the reality is.
Speaker 3: We we we've been under the illusion that we live
Speaker 3: in a democracy and it hasn't been that in quite
Speaker 3: some time.
Speaker 2: And that's what's really scary.
Speaker 3: When you're under the illusion and the masses of people
Speaker 3: are delusional enough to believe it and not recognize that
Speaker 3: this is orchestrated and controlled.
Speaker 2: And that there's a narrative and.
Speaker 3: It looks like democracy and it's some other ship. It's
Speaker 3: some puppeteer shit. It's it's disappointing. But the truth is
Speaker 3: it's not.
Speaker 2: It's never been that, So stay woke, stay vigilant. It's true.
Speaker 2: So basically had the move to Switzerland, Denmark, Sweden.
Speaker 3: Actually I was on a call with some other intimacy
Speaker 3: people and she was moving, Yeah, like Switzerland or something
Speaker 3: over there was on the border of some other ship
Speaker 3: I was like, Okay, that's random, but I write that down.
Speaker 2: I don't want to live there. I don't think I
Speaker 2: meant what did she say? I don't know if I
Speaker 2: believe her. I don't want to.
Speaker 3: I mean, maybe lovely, don't control cold. You can finally
Speaker 3: wear those first right now? You said you wanted seasons,
Speaker 3: not one. I mean, I guess I think there's seasons.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're right. I don't know.
Speaker 4: I'm just whatever's gonna be is gonna be, you know
Speaker 4: what I'm saying. So just fucking enjoy the ride.
Speaker 2: Yeeha, yeehah. Yeah. Is that the affirmation whatever's gonna be
Speaker 2: is gonna be?
Speaker 3: Yeahah yeah, bitch yeah, bitch, rock out with your balls out.
Speaker 2: I think we already had. Okay, well, now.
Speaker 3: It's whatever's gonna be is gonna be.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna pick a card. Okay, there's a horror story
Speaker 2: stories horrorsh story if you could call it that. Oh gosh,
Speaker 2: don't disappoint me.
Speaker 4: Ended a relationship, and shortly after ended up having my
Speaker 4: first threesome with two gentlemen who owned a cannabis company
Speaker 4: together and were roommates in college. At three am when
Speaker 4: they realized there was only one condom left and both
Speaker 4: of them wanted to have sex with me. They rock
Speaker 4: paper scissors, battled for three rounds. Wait, where's the rest
Speaker 4: of the story, right?
Speaker 3: The rock paper scissors for the last condom is epics
Speaker 3: and she's telling me in the middle like.
Speaker 4: Wait, I'm around, come on, it was just okay there
Speaker 4: it is okay, they okay, let's start this over horrors story,
Speaker 4: if you could call it. That ended up ended a
Speaker 4: relationship and shortly after ended up having my first threesome
Speaker 4: with two gentlemen who owned a cannabis company together and
Speaker 4: were roommates in college. At three am, when they realized
Speaker 4: there was only one condom left and both of them
Speaker 4: wanted to have sex with me, they rock paper sais
Speaker 4: are battled for three rounds for who was going to
Speaker 4: go to the store?
Speaker 2: Well, not not doing not do it?
Speaker 3: Like bye, niggae, I got it?
Speaker 4: No, because why why would we not want both? Come on,
Speaker 4: let's get this together. Someone's about to go get this
Speaker 4: condat go to the store.
Speaker 2: I want both.
Speaker 4: It went to sunrise and was equal part sexy and
Speaker 4: hilarious because of how attuned to each other and secure
Speaker 4: in the dynamic. Also not American, so that helps. It
Speaker 4: felt pretty great to experience that after being single for
Speaker 4: the first time in almost eleven years.
Speaker 3: That's a really nice way to pop your cheriot eleven
Speaker 3: year relationship. Hell yeah too, my motherfucking sex god is Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 3: there's something about having sex with two men that are
Speaker 3: both like adorning you that I don't know Ulicia's like
Speaker 3: some kind of guy Like I feel like they do
Speaker 3: tell you not to do it on purpose, like there
Speaker 3: is like a like an intuitiven sure, I'm.
Speaker 2: Like, oh, I'm supposed to do this rising oh the
Speaker 2: sex goddess.
Speaker 4: I mean, that's how I thought of that sex party
Speaker 4: when I was getting I didn't even have sex.
Speaker 2: They were pleasing me and massaging me, both.
Speaker 3: Of them, and I was just like, what the It's
Speaker 3: just like whomen are supposed to be served in that way. Yeah,
Speaker 3: it was a level of service that just yeah, I
Speaker 3: didn't even know I could ask for had arrive, or
Speaker 3: it was even an option, or that they would care
Speaker 3: that much. It's really that that you would even care
Speaker 3: that much about my pleasure, that you would move work together. Yeah,
Speaker 3: you would work together and remove any sort of like
Speaker 3: like societal expectation or story you might tell yourself and
Speaker 3: just fucking make it about me, because hello, yeah, like
Speaker 3: focus on what's important. This is about me. This is
Speaker 3: just do what needs to get done. I feel like
Speaker 3: that was a divine story, like only you know, people
Speaker 3: have like different ideas of God and how God shows
Speaker 3: up and like how God looks and like and I
Speaker 3: think we oftentimes in religion cut off like relating God
Speaker 3: to pleasure and actuality. But like that seems like God
Speaker 3: assuring you into your single dim Like here you go, honey,
Speaker 3: this is this is a liberation you've been looking for.
Speaker 3: You made the right decision, and I'm escorting you out
Speaker 3: of your old relationship into a new this way, you know,
Speaker 3: like it's like a not a rite of passage, but
Speaker 3: like there's something that it feels divinely aligned. And I
Speaker 3: know people would have some people have controversy over shit
Speaker 3: like that.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't get it. I literally don't
Speaker 2: underget it. What why Like if it feels good, it's good.
Speaker 2: So anyway, that was beautiful. Thank you. It was a
Speaker 2: beautiful horror story. That was beautiful. Tarot time, Terot time.
Speaker 2: I picked the two of wands and it looks pretty righteous.
Speaker 2: He's holding the world. He has two staffs.
Speaker 3: He looks like he's on his hassle, looking down at everyone.
Speaker 3: The True of Wanes takes the spark of inspiration from
Speaker 3: the A Wands and turns it into a clear action plan.
Speaker 3: You went through the discovery phase and now and know
Speaker 3: what you want to manifest. Now you need to figure
Speaker 3: out how you're exploring your options and carefully plotting out
Speaker 3: the path ahead, accounting for all possibilities and potential challenges.
Speaker 3: You are open to growth and exploring new territories. So
Speaker 3: long as you maintain a level of certainty, then your
Speaker 3: efforts will work out in the end. When the Two
Speaker 3: of Wands appears in the Tari reading, you are not
Speaker 3: ready to make your move. It is important that you
Speaker 3: established a clear plan before proceeding. We've got to make
Speaker 3: a clear plan if we're going to switcher in or
Speaker 3: The Two of Wands is also about discovery, particularly as
Speaker 3: you step outside of your comfort zone and explore new
Speaker 3: worlds and experiences. It may encourage you to set out,
Speaker 3: but this card gives you the confidence of self knowledge.
Speaker 3: You know what your goal is and are sure it's
Speaker 3: eventual fulfillment. Let your intuition and passion guide you as
Speaker 3: you confirm your next steps. I feel like that speaks
Speaker 3: to me or us right now.
Speaker 2: I think that.
Speaker 3: We've done good moms for so long, and like doing
Speaker 3: things separately seems like uncomfortable and like.
Speaker 2: What alone me?
Speaker 3: I'm a human individual, and so it's like taking the
Speaker 3: courage and study out and not like and stepping out
Speaker 3: of your comfort zone and exploring new worlds and experiences
Speaker 3: and yeah, and the self knowledge, like acknowledging that we've
Speaker 3: learned a lot in this process and giving ourselves like
Speaker 3: credit and like not being so critical and saying, of
Speaker 3: course you could do anything you want and that's good,
Speaker 3: and like sitting with that and not being I feel
Speaker 3: like we live in a world that I feel like
Speaker 3: it makes sometimes expansion like so nerve wracking, like it
Speaker 3: has to be perfect, it has to make money like
Speaker 3: or else. It's like I don't know, like there's a
Speaker 3: perfectionism that comes with.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, that's definitely perfection, like the timing and the
Speaker 4: like yeah, like the.
Speaker 2: Rollout, what's the wrong? I don't know, I know what
Speaker 2: are the colors? I don't know what's the fun? FRANKT,
Speaker 2: How can I do it. If I don't have a
Speaker 2: brand kit, What do you want to do with a
Speaker 2: brand kit? You don't have a fun so I want
Speaker 2: to make it up. That's an extra fee. That's an
Speaker 2: extra fee because I don't know what your colors are.
Speaker 2: I can't do it. I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 3: So yeah, I'm just like in the world of Canvaya.
Speaker 4: I've been thinking a lot about like the reframing of
Speaker 4: gifts because like I've just that's that's where I've been lately,
Speaker 4: like with me getting back into acting and like me,
Speaker 4: you know, I went to New York Fashion Week and
Speaker 4: help my friend with with something that I was like.
Speaker 2: I could do this, Like I do this. I am
Speaker 2: a producer. I produce shows every.
Speaker 4: Stage behind the cameras, like I've I've done this in
Speaker 4: the yeah, like I've done this here, I've done this
Speaker 4: in other like other like realms, like with beauty, and
Speaker 4: I'm like, what the fuck?
Speaker 2: Yeah, like why am I?
Speaker 4: Why am I like putting these different even like almost
Speaker 4: like eras of my life and like I don't do
Speaker 4: that anymore. Now I do this and not really weaving
Speaker 4: them together and seeing like how they can he make
Speaker 4: me multiple streets against streams of income because bitch, like, yeah,
Speaker 4: I don't.
Speaker 2: I feel like that's the only way to really survive.
Speaker 2: And in the times we're in.
Speaker 4: It's like my friend came over the other last night
Speaker 4: and she was telling me that she she's made like
Speaker 4: twelve thousand dollars doing this thing, this app called sniff
Speaker 4: Sniff Spot what okay?
Speaker 2: Sniff Spot is.
Speaker 4: An app where people who don't have backyards can use
Speaker 4: your backyard to play with their dogs in the backyard.
Speaker 3: So play with their dogs.
Speaker 4: Yeah, Like they live in apartments or maybe their dogs
Speaker 4: are aggressive, so they can't really go to like the
Speaker 4: park and run them around. And they live in an
Speaker 4: apartment and they have nowhere, so there's a hole.
Speaker 3: She has like three hundred and fifty reviews. She's like
Speaker 3: top tiers. She made how many twelve thousand, how.
Speaker 2: Many dogs are in the backyard. They clean up their
Speaker 2: own shit. They clean up their own shit.
Speaker 4: But she's like a top like a cellar because she
Speaker 4: has like puppy treats since she has do chikabana like
Speaker 4: dog perfume, and she has bagels for the owners and
Speaker 4: like they.
Speaker 2: Just be chilling.
Speaker 4: Sometimes they'll have she had a Great Dane party. There
Speaker 4: were seven Great Danes. Like people want to have puppy parties.
Speaker 2: I was only in La. I was like, damn do I.
Speaker 2: I brought her to my backyard. I'm like, She's like,
Speaker 2: it could be like a small puppy oasis. I could
Speaker 2: see it.
Speaker 4: I was like, the branding that's happening for small Peppy
Speaker 4: and I.
Speaker 2: Was like, I could see it.
Speaker 4: And I was like, she said, she's like a dog lover,
Speaker 4: like she she saves dogs like every week from the shelter.
Speaker 2: And I told her. I was like, oh yeah, and
Speaker 2: then like my jacuzzie.
Speaker 4: She's like, oh my god. Yeah, the dogs could use
Speaker 4: the jaccuzzie. I was like, no, that's not what I met. Like,
Speaker 4: the humans could use the jacuzzie.
Speaker 2: What would the.
Speaker 3: Dogs doing the jacuzzie? Bitch, it's too hot. They have
Speaker 3: a fur car she has.
Speaker 2: She's a doggy pool for them in her backyard.
Speaker 4: She's top tier sniff spot Anyway, multiple streams of income.
Speaker 2: Is what I'm saying is.
Speaker 3: I'm not I'm not thinking and I'm not I'm not
Speaker 3: thinking out of the box.
Speaker 2: You're not, We're not.
Speaker 4: Okay, we got to get creative and reframe our gifts.
Speaker 4: And that's kind of where I'm at right now in
Speaker 4: my life, is like really reframing the gifts because we
Speaker 4: have so many, so fucking many that can do so
Speaker 4: many different things. And I'm like, okay, and and and
Speaker 4: are creative and keep me creative.
Speaker 2: So and thinking broader and yeah, So.
Speaker 4: This is an invitation for you to reframe your gifts
Speaker 4: if you're in a space in your life where you
Speaker 4: feel stuck, or you want to shift careers, or you
Speaker 4: just you need to like find the inspiration in the
Speaker 4: thing that you used to love again, Like just think
Speaker 4: about reframing the gift that you have, Like what does
Speaker 4: it look like doing like having a different mechanism doing
Speaker 4: something else, like being expressed in a different way, maybe
Speaker 4: in behind the scenes role. Like for me, like I've
Speaker 4: done so much in front of the camera over the
Speaker 4: last few years that I forgot what it's like to.
Speaker 2: Be behind the scenes. And I do enjoy that. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you know, it was great. I don't have I didn't
Speaker 2: have to.
Speaker 3: I was like, no pressure. I mean it's not like
Speaker 3: it was great. I really enjoyed it.
Speaker 2: So yeah, just being open to switching roles.
Speaker 3: So as the season shifts you can just sit on
Speaker 3: that and start to imitate on the new avenues of creativity,
Speaker 3: the new ways of expression. Yes, yes, well anyway, y'all,
Speaker 3: we love you. Thank you for joining us. Make sure
Speaker 3: you rate and subscribe to our podcast. Follow us on
Speaker 3: YouTube and follow the Good Vibe Retreat. We're going to
Speaker 3: a lot of beautiful places next.
Speaker 2: Year, and just click the links in the episode description.
Speaker 2: Bitch okay, just go through them and look, look, look
Speaker 2: at it, look at everything. Subscribe, review. There's a lot
Speaker 2: of cool stuff there. There's discounts probably I don't know.
Speaker 3: Just go look, love you bye bye.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so good, can't you sell? I went through a drought,
Speaker 1: that's until I found out, Well may my have been
Speaker 1: known earth? I used to be broken tail. Now I
Speaker 1: got the blues in ins like Beyonce J justa throat
Speaker 1: shot or pop in his cow wearing our voices. Patriarchy
Speaker 1: kept it in the box to exploit it. Women put
Speaker 1: the pee in power, so it's pointless. They want me
Speaker 1: to be good, so I make bad choices. Bad mom,
Speaker 1: not a bad mom, but a bad mom. It he's
Speaker 1: in on the cannabis in their bathbon walked in Bosts
Speaker 1: cap and I blew his cat ball, hop dog. Now
Speaker 1: I'm immune to the cat called Herbie and no waisted
Speaker 1: straight to it like a dollar sign. Mother, rent the
Speaker 1: lover when too. It in like a water sumner where
Speaker 1: you're rent the winter essential will when the summertime.
Speaker 2: I do it all.
Speaker 1: Ain't know when that needs to running by