1
00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:02,560
Speaker 1: Buckle up, hold on tight. We got it for you here.

2
00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:06,519
Speaker 1: It is strawberry letter. Okay, I gotta do a disclaimer

3
00:00:06,519 --> 00:00:10,760
Speaker 1: on this one because it's a little could be a

4
00:00:10,760 --> 00:00:12,760
Speaker 1: little graphic, so if you have young children in the

5
00:00:12,800 --> 00:00:16,160
Speaker 1: carp parents, please be aware of that. Okay subject, How

6
00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:19,760
Speaker 1: often should you get a massage? Dear Stephen Shirley. I

7
00:00:19,800 --> 00:00:23,040
Speaker 1: am a thirty year old man and I love working out.

8
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:26,640
Speaker 1: I started a new very intense workout routine last month,

9
00:00:26,680 --> 00:00:29,840
Speaker 1: and my trainer suggested that I get a good deep

10
00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:33,600
Speaker 1: tissue massage to get out the kinks. So I scheduled

11
00:00:33,640 --> 00:00:37,840
Speaker 1: a ninety minute deep tissue massage with a massage therapist.

12
00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:42,040
Speaker 1: It's an in home massage service that came highly recommended

13
00:00:42,080 --> 00:00:45,640
Speaker 1: by my trainer. A day later, a female therapist showed

14
00:00:45,680 --> 00:00:48,040
Speaker 1: up at my house and I was surprised at how

15
00:00:48,120 --> 00:00:51,560
Speaker 1: beautiful and in shape she was. She sat up the

16
00:00:51,640 --> 00:00:54,840
Speaker 1: massage table in the den and I got on top

17
00:00:55,080 --> 00:00:59,000
Speaker 1: of the table, face down in my underwear. She advised

18
00:00:59,040 --> 00:01:02,880
Speaker 1: me to get totally undressed so she could work every muscle,

19
00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:06,920
Speaker 1: including my gloups. I was naked, only covered by a

20
00:01:07,000 --> 00:01:11,000
Speaker 1: sheet as she carefully rubbed each muscle in my body.

21
00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:14,399
Speaker 1: She whispered for me to roll over on my back.

22
00:01:14,840 --> 00:01:18,080
Speaker 1: She worked on my neck and my shoulders. Then she

23
00:01:18,160 --> 00:01:21,240
Speaker 1: moved down to my legs and leaned over to whisper,

24
00:01:21,800 --> 00:01:28,280
Speaker 1: may I may. I I shook. I shook my head.

25
00:01:28,360 --> 00:01:31,040
Speaker 1: This is my letter. I shook my head. Yes, and

26
00:01:31,319 --> 00:01:34,800
Speaker 1: this fine female therapist grabbed a muscle that I normally

27
00:01:34,840 --> 00:01:39,959
Speaker 1: don't get massaged. I lay there quietly as yeah as

28
00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:44,440
Speaker 1: she massaged it. And she even yeah, she even went downtown.

29
00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:52,680
Speaker 1: I was speechless. She even went downtown. Yeah, yeah, we can,

30
00:01:55,480 --> 00:01:59,360
Speaker 1: but it means the same thing. Okay, I was speechless,

31
00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:01,840
Speaker 1: but I was praying that my wife didn't walk in.

32
00:02:02,320 --> 00:02:13,360
Speaker 1: Yes I'm married, God, but but yes, I'm married. But

33
00:02:13,440 --> 00:02:15,680
Speaker 1: there is no way I was going to stop this

34
00:02:15,760 --> 00:02:20,920
Speaker 1: massage therapist because she handled me way better than my

35
00:02:21,040 --> 00:02:27,600
Speaker 1: wife ever has. Oh yeah, got up. I tipped her

36
00:02:27,639 --> 00:02:31,240
Speaker 1: well and she left. Now I'm not stupid enough to

37
00:02:31,280 --> 00:02:34,920
Speaker 1: have an affair, but I really really need to see

38
00:02:34,960 --> 00:02:38,320
Speaker 1: her again. After all, my trainer did tell me that

39
00:02:38,360 --> 00:02:41,799
Speaker 1: I should get regular massages. There's got to be some

40
00:02:41,840 --> 00:02:47,680
Speaker 1: way I can justify this. Steve, I need your advice. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

41
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:54,639
Speaker 1: all right, Steve. I need George. Yeah, yeah, all right,

42
00:02:55,600 --> 00:02:59,399
Speaker 1: you answering the question, I'm i'm I'm about my head

43
00:03:00,760 --> 00:03:05,040
Speaker 1: and prayer. Okay. Yeah, he's saying he can't be stupid

44
00:03:05,160 --> 00:03:08,600
Speaker 1: enough to have an affair. But smart people have affairs. Okay,

45
00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:11,720
Speaker 1: and if you think you're smart, uh, you know, listen,

46
00:03:11,800 --> 00:03:14,640
Speaker 1: smart people have affairs. How do you think affairs get started?

47
00:03:14,680 --> 00:03:19,480
Speaker 1: They get started in sometimes in these ways, certainly massages

48
00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:23,480
Speaker 1: sometimes then repeat massages like you want to do. Come on,

49
00:03:23,600 --> 00:03:28,080
Speaker 1: Mary Man, your trainer and this massus have quite a

50
00:03:28,120 --> 00:03:32,000
Speaker 1: hustle going on here, so please be careful. Never ever

51
00:03:32,080 --> 00:03:35,200
Speaker 1: write her a check, because what you don't want is

52
00:03:35,200 --> 00:03:38,680
Speaker 1: for your wife, who you stated in the letter dummy

53
00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:43,280
Speaker 1: very clearly that it's not better. She's not better than

54
00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:46,080
Speaker 1: the massus at handling you. I mean, come on, what

55
00:03:46,160 --> 00:03:48,200
Speaker 1: if your wife comes in and catches you? Okay? Do

56
00:03:48,280 --> 00:03:51,840
Speaker 1: you think about these things? The other thing you have

57
00:03:51,960 --> 00:03:55,839
Speaker 1: to stop is letting this massus, this massage therapist come

58
00:03:55,880 --> 00:03:58,600
Speaker 1: into your home and massage you. There's no way you

59
00:03:58,640 --> 00:04:01,800
Speaker 1: can justify that. Continue you will lee, all right? Your

60
00:04:01,800 --> 00:04:03,760
Speaker 1: wife could come in and walk in on you at

61
00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:06,880
Speaker 1: any time. What are you gonna do? Then? Okay, you

62
00:04:06,960 --> 00:04:08,840
Speaker 1: wait until the very end of the letter to tell

63
00:04:08,880 --> 00:04:12,720
Speaker 1: us you were married, after you sucked us all in anyway,

64
00:04:12,400 --> 00:04:19,719
Speaker 1: after after one happen, after hurt me. We're all caught

65
00:04:19,800 --> 00:04:23,200
Speaker 1: up in the letter, and then he drops the bomb

66
00:04:23,200 --> 00:04:26,400
Speaker 1: that he's married. All right, he needs to stop this immediately,

67
00:04:26,760 --> 00:04:29,480
Speaker 1: you know, especially at his home. He's gonna. I mean,

68
00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:32,120
Speaker 1: this is how affairs start. Right here. The writing is

69
00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:34,279
Speaker 1: I don't do it. Don't do it, all right, Steve,

70
00:04:34,279 --> 00:04:37,240
Speaker 1: Come on, I hear your prayers. I hear your prayers. Oh,

71
00:04:37,839 --> 00:04:47,119
Speaker 1: make me proud, proud, thank you. There's trouble. Just thirty

72
00:04:47,200 --> 00:04:52,320
Speaker 1: year old man loves working out. Oh I don't. I

73
00:04:52,520 --> 00:04:56,200
Speaker 1: work out just so I don't look like certain people.

74
00:04:56,279 --> 00:04:59,920
Speaker 1: I know. That's the only reason I work out. If

75
00:05:00,040 --> 00:05:02,240
Speaker 1: that was a peal that could get this stomach off,

76
00:05:02,279 --> 00:05:06,520
Speaker 1: I take it. I promise you I would. I started

77
00:05:06,560 --> 00:05:10,240
Speaker 1: a very intense workout routine and trainer told you to

78
00:05:10,279 --> 00:05:13,200
Speaker 1: get a deep tissue in shops, get out to kings

79
00:05:13,600 --> 00:05:18,080
Speaker 1: Uh scheduled a ninety minute when massage stairs was reprimmentded

80
00:05:18,120 --> 00:05:21,240
Speaker 1: by your trainers in the home therapist. A day later,

81
00:05:21,320 --> 00:05:23,440
Speaker 1: this woman show up at the doing Lord her Mercy.

82
00:05:23,560 --> 00:05:27,080
Speaker 1: She was fine. She scared. Wait a minute, I am

83
00:05:27,080 --> 00:05:30,039
Speaker 1: scared sharing because he's asking me for helping. I ain't

84
00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:33,160
Speaker 1: got nothing for his ass. She set up the massage

85
00:05:33,240 --> 00:05:37,919
Speaker 1: table in the den. I got on the table, faced down,

86
00:05:38,000 --> 00:05:41,120
Speaker 1: well as you should, in your underwear as you should.

87
00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:44,200
Speaker 1: She advised me to get totally undressed so she could

88
00:05:44,200 --> 00:05:47,680
Speaker 1: work every muscle, including my glutes. Now let's stop right there.

89
00:05:48,000 --> 00:05:52,479
Speaker 1: First of all, we're in your house. If a fine

90
00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:56,799
Speaker 1: woman is in your house and tells you to take

91
00:05:56,880 --> 00:06:00,560
Speaker 1: your draws off, we're in trouble. Yeah, because I can

92
00:06:00,640 --> 00:06:04,280
Speaker 1: get this massage without taking my draws off, and she

93
00:06:04,360 --> 00:06:08,920
Speaker 1: wanted to work every muscle, including my glutes. That's his ass.

94
00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:12,080
Speaker 1: Hold hold up. Once you touch my ass with your

95
00:06:12,120 --> 00:06:15,200
Speaker 1: head and I don't have draws on, there is a

96
00:06:15,279 --> 00:06:17,760
Speaker 1: reaction that come with that. I'm just trying to tell

97
00:06:17,760 --> 00:06:21,039
Speaker 1: you that we'll be back if this letter came with

98
00:06:21,080 --> 00:06:23,680
Speaker 1: a disclaimer, because it gets a little graphic in here.

99
00:06:23,880 --> 00:06:27,520
Speaker 1: All right, thirty year old dude, young dude in shape,

100
00:06:27,760 --> 00:06:30,279
Speaker 1: intense workouts. Trainer told him he needs to get some

101
00:06:30,680 --> 00:06:33,920
Speaker 1: deep tissue massages to get the kinks out. The trainer

102
00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:37,080
Speaker 1: recommended this therapist. She shows up at the house next day.

103
00:06:37,279 --> 00:06:41,320
Speaker 1: She's beautiful and in shape. She sets up the table,

104
00:06:41,760 --> 00:06:44,440
Speaker 1: told him to get undressed. He gets undressed, and before

105
00:06:44,520 --> 00:06:49,039
Speaker 1: he lay down on a fat table face down. Got it.

106
00:06:49,080 --> 00:06:51,760
Speaker 1: He got on the table face down in his underwear.

107
00:06:51,880 --> 00:06:54,760
Speaker 1: She advised me to get totally undressed so she could

108
00:06:54,760 --> 00:06:58,279
Speaker 1: work every muscle, including my glutes. This is where the

109
00:06:58,400 --> 00:07:02,359
Speaker 1: letter starts to turn. Glutes for those of you that

110
00:07:02,480 --> 00:07:06,600
Speaker 1: don't know, is a medical term for ass. Yeah. That

111
00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:13,960
Speaker 1: and so you nack it because she wants to massage

112
00:07:14,040 --> 00:07:18,400
Speaker 1: your ass. That's really what where we down, which creates

113
00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:23,720
Speaker 1: an instant problem for Steve. This is why I don't

114
00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:29,840
Speaker 1: get massages because once you touch my neck it glue

115
00:07:30,720 --> 00:07:36,840
Speaker 1: with your bare hands, that glue automatically becomes an ass.

116
00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:41,119
Speaker 1: It's no longer glue. You touching my ass. I'm saying

117
00:07:41,160 --> 00:07:45,120
Speaker 1: it to myself. She touching my ass while you're on

118
00:07:45,200 --> 00:07:51,160
Speaker 1: the table, I'm saying, she touching my ass. She got

119
00:07:51,160 --> 00:07:55,680
Speaker 1: her finger on my ass. Now, when you can your glue,

120
00:07:55,800 --> 00:08:01,360
Speaker 1: massage your thumb careful. Your phone does a lot of

121
00:08:01,560 --> 00:08:06,240
Speaker 1: probe and type work. Now there's a crease between your

122
00:08:06,400 --> 00:08:09,239
Speaker 1: glue and the top of your fat. There's a little

123
00:08:09,280 --> 00:08:13,800
Speaker 1: line is usually a darker area. It's usually darker on

124
00:08:14,000 --> 00:08:20,080
Speaker 1: most pens. Yeah. Now, once your thumb enters that area,

125
00:08:20,240 --> 00:08:24,160
Speaker 1: that's called the zone. Yes, you do not mess around.

126
00:08:24,200 --> 00:08:27,640
Speaker 1: It rubbed my muscle in the zone, and now you

127
00:08:27,760 --> 00:08:31,120
Speaker 1: covered by a sheet. She rubbed every muscle. She whispered

128
00:08:31,240 --> 00:08:34,679
Speaker 1: for me to roll over on my back. That's the

129
00:08:34,760 --> 00:08:39,680
Speaker 1: other thing. I can't be naked, and we whispered. Listen

130
00:08:39,720 --> 00:08:43,480
Speaker 1: to me. It's no way I can be naked, and

131
00:08:43,640 --> 00:08:49,080
Speaker 1: you whisper because you see, Shirley, I want you to say,

132
00:08:49,120 --> 00:08:51,280
Speaker 1: in a female voice, I want you to just say,

133
00:08:51,520 --> 00:08:57,439
Speaker 1: roll over. Now say it, whisper. Roll over now, huh,

134
00:08:59,080 --> 00:09:06,040
Speaker 1: roll over? Yes, now I see. Watch you whisper. I

135
00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:10,600
Speaker 1: can't roll over because the reaction has begun. Because I'm

136
00:09:10,679 --> 00:09:13,560
Speaker 1: necking and you whispering. You down here by my ear,

137
00:09:13,920 --> 00:09:18,520
Speaker 1: the reaction to the whisper has begun. So you flip over,

138
00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:23,840
Speaker 1: and now she surprises you by start rubbing your neck

139
00:09:23,880 --> 00:09:26,520
Speaker 1: and shoulders. Well after you the whisper to me and

140
00:09:26,559 --> 00:09:32,160
Speaker 1: I turned over. We both have surprises. Hello. Then she

141
00:09:32,320 --> 00:09:36,880
Speaker 1: moved down to my legs and leaned over to whisper again. Man,

142
00:09:38,920 --> 00:09:44,960
Speaker 1: all I could do was shake my head, you whisper, man, yes,

143
00:09:46,000 --> 00:09:48,600
Speaker 1: and I can tell you Charlotte, say may and I'm

144
00:09:48,600 --> 00:09:54,439
Speaker 1: gonna show you how he said yes, man, yes, he

145
00:09:54,440 --> 00:10:03,680
Speaker 1: can't get it out about to cry, whimper. This fine

146
00:10:03,760 --> 00:10:09,920
Speaker 1: female therapist grabbed a muscle that I normally don't get massage. Well,

147
00:10:10,000 --> 00:10:14,040
Speaker 1: this is a problem. Now. I laid that quietly. Now

148
00:10:14,240 --> 00:10:18,559
Speaker 1: that right there, I can't be quiet. I laid that

149
00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:23,920
Speaker 1: quietly as she massaged it and went down. Now, how's

150
00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:30,679
Speaker 1: we quiet this letter at the house. I don't give well,

151
00:10:30,679 --> 00:10:34,000
Speaker 1: I don't give them where we at if I don't

152
00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:38,360
Speaker 1: have a tube sock handy that I can pack in

153
00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:44,319
Speaker 1: my mouth. This is the quietest out. I was speechless,

154
00:10:45,200 --> 00:10:47,800
Speaker 1: but I was praying that my wife didn't walk in.

155
00:10:48,320 --> 00:10:51,560
Speaker 1: You wasn't praying that damn hard. I can tell you

156
00:10:51,720 --> 00:10:55,160
Speaker 1: right now, you weren't praying that hard. Yes, I'm married,

157
00:10:55,160 --> 00:10:58,080
Speaker 1: but there's no way I was gonna stop this massage

158
00:10:58,080 --> 00:11:01,040
Speaker 1: therapist because she handled me where ain't better than my

159
00:11:01,160 --> 00:11:06,840
Speaker 1: wife ever has that? This is where we got her

160
00:11:06,840 --> 00:11:11,320
Speaker 1: problem in you and the reason why she was handling

161
00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:14,920
Speaker 1: you way better than your wife, it's because she got

162
00:11:15,000 --> 00:11:20,040
Speaker 1: way more experience. Because this is what she do she's

163
00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:25,040
Speaker 1: a massage therapist, whisperer. I tiptoe well as she left you.

164
00:11:25,160 --> 00:11:27,920
Speaker 1: Damn right you did. Na, I'm not stupid enough to

165
00:11:27,960 --> 00:11:32,120
Speaker 1: have an affair. What you think just happened? Dog, I

166
00:11:32,160 --> 00:11:34,840
Speaker 1: don't know if y'all know, if you thirty, I'm not

167
00:11:34,920 --> 00:11:36,800
Speaker 1: stupid enough to have an affair. I don't know what

168
00:11:36,880 --> 00:11:40,760
Speaker 1: you think just happened. But that's the definition of an affair.

169
00:11:41,800 --> 00:11:44,040
Speaker 1: But I really really need to see her again. I

170
00:11:44,120 --> 00:11:46,960
Speaker 1: know you do. After all, my trainer did tell me

171
00:11:47,000 --> 00:11:49,960
Speaker 1: I should get regular massages. There's gotta be some way

172
00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,880
Speaker 1: I could justify that. Steve, I need your adviser. But Bro,

173
00:11:53,200 --> 00:11:55,199
Speaker 1: because we're on the radio, let me tell you something

174
00:11:55,679 --> 00:11:58,360
Speaker 1: you can. You can justify by saying you need regular

175
00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:01,199
Speaker 1: deep tissue massages. But I don't know how hard you're

176
00:12:01,200 --> 00:12:04,640
Speaker 1: working out where that muscle is. So this is an affair.

177
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:07,160
Speaker 1: I don't know what you what you're doing push ups

178
00:12:07,160 --> 00:12:10,360
Speaker 1: and fail I don't know what you did. Dog, you

179
00:12:10,520 --> 00:12:14,240
Speaker 1: in trouble. You're having an affair, and you can call

180
00:12:14,280 --> 00:12:16,199
Speaker 1: it what you want to call it, but that's what

181
00:12:16,280 --> 00:12:19,440
Speaker 1: this is. Post your comments on Today's Strawberry Letters on

182
00:12:19,640 --> 00:12:23,640
Speaker 1: Instagram and Facebook at Steve Harvey FM. Also check out

183
00:12:23,640 --> 00:12:27,280
Speaker 1: the Strawberry Letter podcast on demand you're listening to the

184
00:12:27,400 --> 00:12:28,839
Speaker 1: Steve Harvey Morning Show