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Speaker 1: Atlanta.

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Speaker 2: Guess what the good Moms are coming to your city

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Speaker 2: on April twenty six. We're pulling up at the Black

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Speaker 2: Effect Podcast Festival.

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Speaker 3: That's right, We'll be hitting the stage with other hot

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Speaker 3: podcasts like R and B, Money, Trap Nerds, Naked Sports,

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Speaker 3: and Sarah Jakes.

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Speaker 2: And if you've ever been to a Good Mom's Bad

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Speaker 2: Choices show, you know it gets real, real bad, and

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Speaker 2: we have some special guests. So I'm so excited to

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Speaker 2: meet our Atlanta tribe. Make sure you pull up April

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Speaker 2: twenty six to the Black Effect Podcast Festival and get

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Speaker 2: your tickets at Black Effect dot Com Slash Podcast Festival.

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Speaker 1: See you there.

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Speaker 4: Once upon a time, there was a good old traditional housewife.

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Speaker 4: She cooked, she cleaned.

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Speaker 5: Cared for her children and the man of the house,

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Speaker 5: and of course she.

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Speaker 6: Didn't talk back.

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Speaker 7: She was both.

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Speaker 8: Obedient and soft by nature.

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Speaker 6: She was a good woman who always made good choices.

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Speaker 9: I sing that shit off.

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Speaker 2: We're good Mom's Bad Choices too, single mom who said

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Speaker 2: fuck the patriarchy, shared all.

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Speaker 9: Their bad choices and sound out they were so bad.

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Speaker 9: After all, we're experts. Over chairs and your new bestie,

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Speaker 9: sit back and do the ride.

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Speaker 1: I can do a pack on my.

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Speaker 9: Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices.

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Speaker 1: I'm Erica and I'm Meila, and it's Wednesday. You're gonna

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Speaker 1: see you.

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Speaker 9: Holding hands off camera while we haven't introduced the guests yet.

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Speaker 7: Can help us?

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Speaker 1: Sorry, m.

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Speaker 2: But I like no want to see her for three seconds.

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Speaker 2: Welcome back to Good Mom's Bad Choices. I'm Erica and

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Speaker 2: I'm Meila. Happy Wednesday, bitches, it's it's the.

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Speaker 9: Ojis of uncensored motherhood. Okay, coming live in effect black effect. Hey,

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Speaker 9: just in case you bitches forgot.

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Speaker 1: Let him know, baby, we started all this ship.

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Speaker 3: We started all this ship. Two single moms walking to

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Speaker 3: a bar, one holding tequila.

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Speaker 1: And the other one on the brink of a breakup.

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Speaker 9: Both with tequila in hand.

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Speaker 2: C we found love in a hopeless place, Rihanna, this

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Speaker 2: sounds familiar. It's because maybe you've wrote our book, A

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Speaker 2: Good Mom's Guide to Making Bad Choices.

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Speaker 9: And if you haven't, this is a reminder that you

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Speaker 9: need to. Because what other book starts like that Mother's

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Speaker 9: Day is coming out.

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Speaker 3: That maybe you know a mother who's about to become

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Speaker 3: a mother, or a woman who's thinking about becoming a mother,

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Speaker 3: and she should probably rethinking her decision, or maybe she's

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Speaker 3: on the brink of giving birth. This is the book

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Speaker 3: you need to give her, because well, we know what

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Speaker 3: we're talking about.

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Speaker 2: It's the Motherhood Bible. It is so you could just

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Speaker 2: call us the Black Jesus.

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Speaker 9: We wrote it.

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Speaker 1: They're black jesesas.

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Speaker 9: Lossas mos Las. Who's this?

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Speaker 3: They're Los Angeles, like of Nazareth, but of Los Angeles.

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Speaker 1: Got it, I got it, I understood.

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Speaker 9: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: How are you feeling this week, my dear?

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Speaker 9: Okay, okay, thank you.

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Speaker 1: I feel good. I feel great.

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Speaker 2: I feel like I've been dreaming a lot.

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Speaker 9: Me too.

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Speaker 2: I've been having a lot, a lot of dreams, like

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Speaker 2: every single night of vivid ass dream and normally I

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Speaker 2: don't even remember my dreams, but I've been remembering.

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Speaker 1: Not not every detail, but more than usual, and.

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Speaker 2: I've been recording them when I wake up, because if

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Speaker 2: I don't now forget.

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Speaker 9: I just remember.

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Speaker 3: I had a lot of vivid dreams, I told Orlando,

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Speaker 3: But right now, in this moment, I can't think of

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Speaker 3: any of them. And I had the when I feel

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Speaker 3: like last night, I've had a really really vivid dreams.

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Speaker 3: Since I put this like a symbol on my mirror,

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Speaker 3: but I'm gonna start recording them.

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Speaker 9: That's a good idea.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you just have to like hit the voice memo

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Speaker 2: on your phone immediately. But I had one the other

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Speaker 2: night where all my hair was falling out. It was

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Speaker 2: like just like a little patch of hair, and then

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Speaker 2: I started like moving it, and then like more started

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Speaker 2: coming out, and.

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Speaker 1: Then I was like, oh my god. And then I

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Speaker 1: went into the room. Iri was there and I had

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Speaker 1: like a U part, but it.

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Speaker 2: Was bald, bitch, I had a fucking you part. It

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Speaker 2: was really devastating. So apparently I looked it up. It

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Speaker 2: means either fear of aging or stress and anxiety, or

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Speaker 2: I don't know, fear of change.

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Speaker 9: Interesting.

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Speaker 1: Interesting, basically fright.

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Speaker 9: It's a tip of the week. Tip of the week

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Speaker 9: is record your dreams.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that's tip of the week. Yeah, record your dreams.

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Speaker 2: I think I was telling Mila, or I was telling

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Speaker 2: you or somebody I was. I think I told you

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Speaker 2: be careful putting a mirror in front of your bed

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Speaker 2: when you put that mirror there, and then I didn't

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Speaker 2: have my mirror in front of my bed, and now

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Speaker 2: I have a mirror ish sort of facing the corner

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Speaker 2: of my bed, and I swear ever since I put

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Speaker 2: that mirror there, I've been having a lot of dreams.

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Speaker 3: I think it was a mirror. Plus putting the symbol

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Speaker 3: on the mirror. This, I think it's a syllicle. I

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Speaker 3: don't think you need a symbol for the dreams to happen.

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Speaker 3: Oh well, that's the only time I started getting them

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Speaker 3: super vivid shit. I don't know anyway, Anyway, today we

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Speaker 3: have some very special guests. You guys, it's a very

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Speaker 3: special it's a very special week on Good Mom's Bad

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Speaker 3: Choices because the first in the lifetime ever occurrence that

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Speaker 3: we've ever had on Good Moms.

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Speaker 9: It's been seven years and this has never happened. So

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Speaker 9: you were in for an exclusive, exclusive, exclusive drum.

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Speaker 1: I'm nervous.

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Speaker 3: You'll be okay, You'll be okay. Today we have very

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Speaker 3: special guests, like I said before, and the guests today

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Speaker 3: are are none other than our men, our men, our men,

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Speaker 3: our partners, our boyfriend and fiance.

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Speaker 1: Do you remember in an episode we had a practicing boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: One time twenty we got boyfriends and we like officially

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Speaker 3: and we were like we have but.

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Speaker 9: We got.

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Speaker 1: A friend of a friend.

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Speaker 3: Was a boy we were allergic, probably because were allergic

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Speaker 3: to them and we were fighting against our bodies. But

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Speaker 3: now we can say it's strong. Welcome to the show, Orlando,

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Speaker 3: and shut him. Hey, you've been on the show before.

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Speaker 3: You're always on the show, hovering over my shoulder every

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Speaker 3: move I make.

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Speaker 2: I mean, I've what I've been. I saw the first

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Speaker 2: episode when they didn't know you guys were going to

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Speaker 2: be boyfriend and girlfriend. Then I was there when you

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Speaker 2: guys were date.

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Speaker 7: Girlfriend at that time.

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Speaker 3: Officially, you really didn't really believe it because you told

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Speaker 3: us it was a lie.

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Speaker 2: Wasn't true because you guys weren't because you weren't committing fully, No,

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Speaker 2: I was.

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Speaker 9: You were just saying, like, you never go visit her.

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Speaker 9: You guys are not a relationship. Remember you called it.

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Speaker 3: You're not paying her rent. You don't pay for her

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Speaker 3: to come see you. And I was like, I just

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Speaker 3: said there quietly.

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Speaker 2: Now I had to do a check if you were

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Speaker 2: strong enough, mad enough to deal with my questions, Orlando.

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Speaker 3: And then you did it again in November when we

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Speaker 3: did a couple of months and you asked us if

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Speaker 3: we knew each other by asking us questions.

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Speaker 1: Oh, that's the one I'm thinking about Yeah, no, I

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Speaker 1: was thinking.

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Speaker 3: About the one before that in Woodland Hills where he

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Speaker 3: was on that other podcast that we don't speak of.

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Speaker 9: Is that other weird guy?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you guys were kind of not you guys

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Speaker 2: were you guys were not official?

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Speaker 3: Then it was Remember he went on a hard press

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Speaker 3: release and I was like, chill out.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Well that's why I didn't believe. That's why you

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Speaker 1: with you. I'll be going off your energy beach anyway.

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Speaker 3: Well now I have less commitment issues because I got

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Speaker 3: a ring, y'all.

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Speaker 2: I was telling me al I was nervous for this

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Speaker 2: episode because I've never obviously had a partner on the

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Speaker 2: show before, and she was acting like I was crazy,

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Speaker 2: and I was like, bitch, you don't.

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Speaker 1: Remember how nervous you were the first time. Orlando she

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Speaker 1: was over here.

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Speaker 6: Like I'm nervous.

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Speaker 7: Should we do this?

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Speaker 4: I don't know.

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Speaker 1: I'm like, how quickly we forget?

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Speaker 9: I was nervous for my other hos.

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Speaker 3: It was it was more about it wasn't about me

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Speaker 3: going public. It was just more like, it feels like

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Speaker 3: it's super like pissing on me in public. Even though

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Speaker 3: Orlanda had told like fifty people online already, so that

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Speaker 3: was my biggest concern. But I've really I've grounded into

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Speaker 3: my partnerism. As you can see, I'm wearing a long dress,

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Speaker 3: which screams I'm in a relationship.

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Speaker 7: That's a good Christian woman right now.

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Speaker 1: Wow, you're so conservative cat ears.

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Speaker 9: Yeah, I'm a house not a wildcat.

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Speaker 5: Speaking speaking of dreams, you were in my dream last

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Speaker 5: night too. Really, it was kind of embarrassing.

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Speaker 6: To tell.

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Speaker 5: We were at a pool party and Chelsea and I

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Speaker 5: forgot her name, the dark skin girl from Black Girls

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Speaker 5: Sex thing. They were like, Miila had cheated on me

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Speaker 5: in the pool. She was having sex with some money

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Speaker 5: in the pool.

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Speaker 7: Wow. And then they had came home and me. They

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Speaker 7: were like, I think Mela was having sex with that

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Speaker 7: guy in the pool. I was embarrassed. Pay it off.

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Speaker 7: I was like, you know, we're not monogous.

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Speaker 2: You know, you know that's right, protect your relationship publicly.

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Speaker 7: I was like, you know, she she could do that

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Speaker 7: because you're not.

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Speaker 1: Curse her ass out later that that was your dream?

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Speaker 1: Did you wake up mad?

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Speaker 9: Like what happened?

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Speaker 7: We had that? Then we had sex. It was better.

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Speaker 7: I felt better about myself.

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Speaker 9: You didn't tell me any of this.

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Speaker 1: A bit abusive and sex this morning, know that I.

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Speaker 3: Think of it for some shit I didn't do in

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Speaker 3: somebody's pool I don't know of.

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Speaker 7: It's crazy.

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Speaker 2: We wanted to have a We wanted to have an

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Speaker 2: episode with our men, because you know, I score the

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Speaker 2: Internet a lot, and I noticed that there's a lot

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Speaker 2: of just.

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Speaker 3: Women hate and man hate. And I'm not even sure

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Speaker 3: if we like each other. You just like to have

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Speaker 3: sex with each other. So I figured today it would

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Speaker 3: be a good day to just promote.

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Speaker 9: Young black sexy love.

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Speaker 3: And we're talking about a lot about reparenting ourselves as

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Speaker 3: we parent children, but now we I have to learn

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Speaker 3: how to reprogram ourselves in relationships because well, we never

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Speaker 3: seen any healthy ones, how about you too?

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Speaker 9: Not TV doesn't.

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Speaker 10: Count, TV doesn't count fresh prints and theolong doesn't count,

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Speaker 10: all right, so if Love Jones doesn't count, I have

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Speaker 10: been blessed to see a few really good relationships growing up,

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Speaker 10: aunties and uncles, and I got a pretty good blueprint.

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Speaker 10: But then again, it's like you can only use so

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Speaker 10: many of their tricks because they're different people and they're

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Speaker 10: old and stuff used to go back then that doesn't

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Speaker 10: really go now and they're old back then Flowers chocolates

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Speaker 10: in the movie, was like, we're going together.

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Speaker 6: It's like, that's it.

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Speaker 1: Now, you gotta get a Burken bag.

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Speaker 2: Apparently people's rent and that's why.

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Speaker 3: I have no broken bags. Oh my god, speaking of

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Speaker 3: I let her trying to embarrass me. Today, there was

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Speaker 3: a girl here. She had on a full Gucci outfit.

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Speaker 3: I was like, Wow, a nice outfit. She was like,

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Speaker 3: Orlando said, you own this outfit. I was like, I

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Speaker 3: don't own any Gucci. He's like, you don't own that outfit.

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Speaker 1: I was like, no, Why did you think she owned

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Speaker 1: that outfit?

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Speaker 7: You've seen it?

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Speaker 3: No, because you're buying me a Gucci or Burken bags,

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Speaker 3: Which bring us back to the conversation, do we even

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Speaker 3: go together?

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Speaker 7: We stop? She know my dreams and might get some,

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Speaker 7: you know.

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Speaker 3: Unfortunately, Dannian turned into a very hard gangster with tattoos

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Speaker 3: on his face, so he didn't have the same hold

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Speaker 3: on me as an adult. Seventh grade seventh grade though,

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Speaker 3: it was crazy, I know, but I just you know,

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Speaker 3: I think a lot of the internet couples that we

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Speaker 3: see are always like very over the top and annoying.

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Speaker 3: And I also notice a lot of the couple's content

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Speaker 3: is no offense you guys.

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Speaker 9: It's very Christian.

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Speaker 3: It's very wholesome and Christian, and I sometimes I can't relate,

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Speaker 3: you know, because it's always like putting a Bible verse

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Speaker 3: in there.

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Speaker 9: So I just figured, we what what content is?

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Speaker 1: Are you being fed?

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Speaker 9: I'm telling you, I get fed a lot of couples content.

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Speaker 2: We're trying to fuck with you. The Christian content, couples

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Speaker 2: content is in your algorithm.

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Speaker 9: Yeah.

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Speaker 7: Interesting, Actually I know what you're talking about.

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Speaker 6: That.

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Speaker 1: I do know what you mean. I just didn't know.

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Speaker 2: I see the wholesomeness I see, but I think that's

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Speaker 2: like there's a mix of wholesome normal and perhaps you

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Speaker 2: know people.

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Speaker 5: I just don't necessarily like it because it's like it's

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Speaker 5: always leaving it up to God. There's never really any

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Speaker 5: real work or really advice to do. It's just yeah,

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Speaker 5: because you know, things were bad and then we prayed.

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Speaker 5: It's like, no, you communicated, you spoke, you had hard conversations,

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Speaker 5: you brought things that are forefront, and you know, you

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Speaker 5: breathe an ice theired and then things got a little

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Speaker 5: bit better. But it's never really any real work or

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Speaker 5: advice like that. It's just you know, pick out a

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Speaker 5: Bible verse and I'm.

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Speaker 2: Gonna let you know right now that they didn't breathe

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Speaker 2: an ice stair. I'm going to let you know that

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Speaker 2: most people are not breathing in ice stair.

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Speaker 7: They didn't do that. Instead of oh okay, I.

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Speaker 1: Was saying that would be great. I think more people

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Speaker 1: need to do that.

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Speaker 7: They need to do Yeah, yeah, it's terrible.

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Speaker 3: Anyway, as you guys know, we were hosting couples Are

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Speaker 3: Treat in June. We are a couple Tanto Retreat. It's

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Speaker 3: in Costa Rica. It's our second home. It's gonna be

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Speaker 3: warm and sexy and bomb and we're gonna do a

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Speaker 3: lot of sexy shit there. So I figured a better

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Speaker 3: place to talk about the ins and outs of our relationship.

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Speaker 6: Yes, beautiful experience.

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Speaker 9: Didn't you guys just hit it? One year anniversary? How

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Speaker 9: does that feel? Guys?

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Speaker 10: It feels good. It feels good. It feels like it's

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Speaker 10: been longer. But we're also not rushing, so we purposely

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Speaker 10: move slow.

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Speaker 2: I think that's nice, not like lesbians. Yeah, one year

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Speaker 2: and lesbians is like seven hundred years. Yeah, it's like

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Speaker 2: seven years yeah.

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Speaker 1: I think.

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Speaker 2: I mean I shared about this on the podcast too

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Speaker 2: early on, that we entered into our relationship in celibacy

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Speaker 2: and in an understanding that we were going to really

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Speaker 2: get to know one another outside of that and build

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Speaker 2: intimate see in other ways, how was that for you? Yeah?

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Speaker 1: How was that?

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Speaker 2: How was I mean, I've shared what it was like

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Speaker 2: for me, but what was like that? What was that

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Speaker 2: like for you? In this relationship?

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Speaker 6: Celibacy was fun? It was fun because celibacy, by yourself sucks.

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Speaker 2: I'll say that, I mean because you were already on

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Speaker 2: a celibacy journey for almost a year before.

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Speaker 6: Yeah.

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Speaker 10: And and by suck, I mean I think we're both

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Speaker 10: very We both have very high sex drives. And the

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Speaker 10: reason why I was celibate was so that I can

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Speaker 10: find a way I was attempting to master redirecting my

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Speaker 10: sexual energy into a creative force, and I was learning

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Speaker 10: really good things, having a good time. But then there's

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Speaker 10: other parts of it that you would like to experience.

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Speaker 10: And so I had a great time in the beginning

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Speaker 10: because I felt like we were experimenting with every possible

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Speaker 10: thing first, and I think we verbalized like we prioritized

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Speaker 10: experimenting with everything first, and it was fun.

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Speaker 6: It was like an adventure.

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Speaker 10: It was a little exploration of my patience of my

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Speaker 10: own willingness. I don't know how to expand on that,

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Speaker 10: my own willingness, like just being willing to do things,

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Speaker 10: even with Iri being willing to play. And the whole

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Speaker 10: beginning of that was just fun experiencing what I was

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Speaker 10: willing to do. And then when we finally decided to

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Speaker 10: do it, it was intentional. We fasted before. I think that's

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Speaker 10: really important.

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Speaker 9: Fast.

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Speaker 10: Yeah, we did a water fast for seven days. That

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Speaker 10: was before we decided to consecrate that.

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Speaker 9: Why do you think that was important?

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Speaker 10: Because not only did we go on a journey together

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Speaker 10: in the fast, we went on a journey together. But

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Speaker 10: I think it's important because I know I purposely cleansed

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Speaker 10: everybody out of me to the best of my ability

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Speaker 10: before offering myself to.

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Speaker 6: You in that way.

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Speaker 10: So I know we can't completely rid ourselves of all

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Speaker 10: of our experiences, and nor do we want to. But

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Speaker 10: I wanted to get rid of as much cook and

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Speaker 10: muck and leftover so that I can go into this freeman.

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Speaker 6: And I did it. I came do this for free,

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Speaker 6: so it felt good. I loved it.

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Speaker 7: So you're born in virgin.

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Speaker 2: It popped my cherry and I was a virgin again.

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Speaker 5: You know, we might be a good for for this,

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Speaker 5: like couples, true, because me and Mila hit it off zero.

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Speaker 7: To one hundred.

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Speaker 3: First of all, I want to make sure that's a

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Speaker 3: celibacy is funds.

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Speaker 1: They were definitely no. I really enjoyed it. I highly recommend.

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Speaker 2: I've talked about it endlessly, how important it was for

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Speaker 2: our relationship and how it's been.

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Speaker 1: Important even like I've done, I've had done.

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Speaker 2: I've been celibate before this, and that was also important,

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Speaker 2: But this was different because before I was celibate, not

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Speaker 2: necessarily it was for myself, and obviously when we did it,

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Speaker 2: it was for ourselves individually, but it was also for

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Speaker 2: this entity that we've created.

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Speaker 1: You know, me and Mela talk about our.

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Speaker 2: Entity that we have America, and shir Ken and I

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Speaker 2: have an entity as well that we've created, and like,

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Speaker 2: I think that when we wanted to consecrated and really

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Speaker 2: create the foundation of it, I wanted it to be

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Speaker 2: a clean slate, you know, or at least try my best.

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Speaker 2: I think I'm I'm not the perfect person. I'm sure

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Speaker 2: that I've brought up ship from the past that has

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Speaker 2: nothing to do with you, and I think as women

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Speaker 2: like and men, I think mostly women that I think

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Speaker 2: women do this the most is like where they bring

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Speaker 2: things up from the past, like I'm just you know,

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Speaker 2: would you agree that? Would you agree that women usually

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Speaker 2: not your past like bringing other things like.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, and I didn't. I wanted to try.

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Speaker 2: My best to really give this relationship and this this entity,

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Speaker 2: this thing that we've created like a complete fair shot

395
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Speaker 2: of just like purenessship, the relationships funk your palate, palate

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Speaker 2: selibacy is the ginger of relationships.

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Speaker 3: It's interesting you say that, though, because I just recently

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Speaker 3: sent Orlando a real about It was about preparing for pregnancy,

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Speaker 3: and a lot of the times a woman is always

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Speaker 3: thinking like that you have to prepare because you're carrying

401
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Speaker 3: the baby. But this this reel was like basically saying

402
00:18:20,080 --> 00:18:22,720
Speaker 3: that there are certain conditions in pregnancy that come from

403
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Speaker 3: the sperm. Like for when it set out to me,

404
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:28,080
Speaker 3: it was preclamsya because that's what happened in my first pregnancy,

405
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Speaker 3: in my first delivery. So I was like, huh, they're

406
00:18:30,920 --> 00:18:33,560
Speaker 3: like before if my if my woman can give a

407
00:18:33,680 --> 00:18:36,560
Speaker 3: nine month period where she's building and they're like having

408
00:18:36,600 --> 00:18:38,959
Speaker 3: to be in this certain like alignment for this child

409
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Speaker 3: nine months. Then the year before that is the responsibility

410
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Speaker 3: of the cleansing of the man. So that once we

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Speaker 3: do take and think I do, I've been like I've

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Speaker 3: I've recognized in this iteration of child bearing years, my

413
00:18:51,960 --> 00:18:54,600
Speaker 3: latter years, that there's a preparation that I want to

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Speaker 3: have with my body, like physically and obviously spiritually too

415
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Speaker 3: that I'm more like in tune with because I already

416
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Speaker 3: have a kid that I didn't have a lot of

417
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Speaker 3: preparation for. But I never considered it, and like I

418
00:19:03,920 --> 00:19:06,240
Speaker 3: didn't really consider them having to do ship before having

419
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Speaker 3: a baby. Really, I was just putting it on the

420
00:19:07,680 --> 00:19:10,440
Speaker 3: pressure on myself. But then I mean even yeah, because

421
00:19:10,640 --> 00:19:14,120
Speaker 3: the sperm is very like life giving and then I yeah,

422
00:19:14,280 --> 00:19:17,920
Speaker 3: but to apply that to taking it into a new

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Speaker 3: relationship is you know, that's elevate, Like that makes sense.

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Speaker 7: I try to cleanse myself befo a relationship that's a

425
00:19:25,320 --> 00:19:30,480
Speaker 7: lie kind of episodic we have here we're supposed to

426
00:19:30,480 --> 00:19:31,200
Speaker 7: be to save face.

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Speaker 5: Baby, no, no, no, for real, I started, like the

428
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Speaker 5: main girls that i'm talking to. I start let them know, like,

429
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Speaker 5: not be around as much, not gonna be answering calls

430
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Speaker 5: as much.

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Speaker 2: Good morning, not a ghoster, you're you're.

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Speaker 5: These the situationships, I don't let them know there's a

433
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Speaker 5: main one. Start posting her more on stories, let them

434
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Speaker 5: know what top of time.

435
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Speaker 6: I was really honest, I'm watching. I'm seeing it the

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Speaker 6: whole time. I'm watching.

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Speaker 5: Yes, I do it every time. Every time about to start

438
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Speaker 5: a relationship, I start acting a certain way. I start

439
00:20:00,720 --> 00:20:03,760
Speaker 5: going from a hole to a husband mentality, start thinking

440
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Speaker 5: of like flowers and stuff.

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Speaker 9: I start thinking flowers.

442
00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:08,840
Speaker 5: Ideas, where can we go in the city, Like all

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00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:10,560
Speaker 5: the things have to start coming up. I started prepping

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Speaker 5: myself for a relationship. Then boom, my husband again.

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Speaker 3: Okay, I'm really interested in this. As we're on this

446
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Speaker 3: topic of preparation for relationship, I think that obviously to me,

447
00:20:22,280 --> 00:20:25,920
Speaker 3: this is a surprise. But no, no, I recognize that.

448
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Speaker 3: But I don't think a lot of women get the

449
00:20:27,760 --> 00:20:30,800
Speaker 3: opportunity to hear from the perspective of men, all that

450
00:20:30,800 --> 00:20:33,280
Speaker 3: that requires and how how that looks. I think there's

451
00:20:33,600 --> 00:20:35,840
Speaker 3: most women think that if they're going to be in

452
00:20:35,880 --> 00:20:37,160
Speaker 3: a relationships.

453
00:20:37,560 --> 00:20:38,920
Speaker 7: You look like you got some good to say. That's

454
00:20:38,920 --> 00:20:39,320
Speaker 7: your camera.

455
00:20:42,040 --> 00:20:46,080
Speaker 6: Listen, do you want a list?

456
00:20:46,840 --> 00:20:49,400
Speaker 9: Go ahead please, This is the list of preparation.

457
00:20:49,480 --> 00:20:50,439
Speaker 7: All right.

458
00:20:50,480 --> 00:20:52,640
Speaker 10: We're going to go back and forth on a checklist

459
00:20:52,680 --> 00:20:54,880
Speaker 10: of things you have to check off before you even

460
00:20:54,960 --> 00:20:57,879
Speaker 10: decide to pursue a woman because you might end up

461
00:20:57,920 --> 00:21:02,560
Speaker 10: wasting her time and your money. So yourtrong number one,

462
00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:05,479
Speaker 10: learn how to clean yourself.

463
00:21:07,240 --> 00:21:12,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, you would think that standard standard taking no steps.

464
00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:13,480
Speaker 9: If they don't, they think they know.

465
00:21:13,680 --> 00:21:15,880
Speaker 1: When you clean yourself to me, like your dick or ye.

466
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:17,560
Speaker 9: Ye, yeah, I was thinking physically.

467
00:21:17,200 --> 00:21:20,040
Speaker 5: Like your nails, wash clean under my fingernails, Wash your

468
00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:21,679
Speaker 5: hands more because that's the can.

469
00:21:21,760 --> 00:21:27,520
Speaker 1: We also add teeth also, all right.

470
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:31,040
Speaker 10: I'm talking still hearing from some of my homegirls that

471
00:21:31,160 --> 00:21:34,560
Speaker 10: niggas don't know how to floss properly. Okay, so we

472
00:21:34,640 --> 00:21:37,879
Speaker 10: need to rethink the lotion we're wearing. It's no more jerggons,

473
00:21:37,880 --> 00:21:41,000
Speaker 10: my brothers. Listen, you're a king, you deserve that shade.

474
00:21:41,000 --> 00:21:45,359
Speaker 10: But okay, I'm gonna go with that first hygiene washing

475
00:21:45,400 --> 00:21:47,640
Speaker 10: your bed sheets, right, No, want to wash your clothes,

476
00:21:47,760 --> 00:21:50,800
Speaker 10: you know, throwing away all the ship yes, okay, just

477
00:21:50,880 --> 00:21:51,280
Speaker 10: number one.

478
00:21:51,320 --> 00:21:55,360
Speaker 7: Okay, my first thing is exercise number two. This is

479
00:21:55,400 --> 00:21:56,080
Speaker 7: this is the person.

480
00:21:56,240 --> 00:21:56,600
Speaker 9: Stamina.

481
00:21:56,640 --> 00:21:59,520
Speaker 5: I'm gonna have to stamina and specifically stand up because

482
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:02,119
Speaker 5: this is the person. It's not like I'm just in

483
00:22:02,160 --> 00:22:04,080
Speaker 5: and out one nice stands. I could fuck around and

484
00:22:04,119 --> 00:22:06,160
Speaker 5: like maybe have a bad nice whatever. She's not gonna

485
00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:07,879
Speaker 5: be around. I'm never gonna see her again. It's not

486
00:22:07,920 --> 00:22:10,200
Speaker 5: gonna happen. This person's gonna be around all the time.

487
00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:12,159
Speaker 5: So I need to be on tip top shape to

488
00:22:12,200 --> 00:22:14,919
Speaker 5: deliver and perform. And exercise is really the one hit

489
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:17,600
Speaker 5: the elliptical. That's really that's really to go to fifteen

490
00:22:17,600 --> 00:22:18,919
Speaker 5: minutes before you work out five.

491
00:22:18,800 --> 00:22:19,879
Speaker 7: Minutes after because you never know.

492
00:22:19,960 --> 00:22:21,880
Speaker 3: We're gonna read a podcast and then he's gonna ask

493
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:23,720
Speaker 3: you did you come last night? And then you tell

494
00:22:23,760 --> 00:22:25,680
Speaker 3: the truth and say no, and then he's gonna be

495
00:22:25,760 --> 00:22:26,480
Speaker 3: really mad.

496
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:32,560
Speaker 9: That never happened. I'm just saying, just in case it happened.

497
00:22:35,800 --> 00:22:37,919
Speaker 9: Number three SIPs tea slowly.

498
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:46,000
Speaker 10: Number three read a diverse amount books, and I don't

499
00:22:46,000 --> 00:22:48,199
Speaker 10: think it has to be serious. I don't think it

500
00:22:48,240 --> 00:22:50,199
Speaker 10: has to be self help, because after three of them

501
00:22:50,240 --> 00:22:53,480
Speaker 10: are all saying the same thing. Fucking believe in yourself,

502
00:22:53,680 --> 00:22:56,760
Speaker 10: know yourself, and do it yourself all right. Outside of that,

503
00:22:57,040 --> 00:22:59,760
Speaker 10: read a fucking novel. Expand your imagination. It might help

504
00:22:59,800 --> 00:23:04,960
Speaker 10: with read fun things, read poetry, read read, read philosophy,

505
00:23:05,040 --> 00:23:05,960
Speaker 10: expand your funk.

506
00:23:06,119 --> 00:23:08,240
Speaker 1: Nig just read, please read, just read a book.

507
00:23:08,520 --> 00:23:09,160
Speaker 6: Read read.

508
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:12,400
Speaker 3: So it doesn't have to be love centered, or I mean,

509
00:23:12,600 --> 00:23:14,720
Speaker 3: I would appreciate. You know, when me and Orlando first

510
00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:17,560
Speaker 3: started dating, he read a book called every Man's Marriage,

511
00:23:17,720 --> 00:23:19,320
Speaker 3: and I thought it was a little serious from the

512
00:23:19,359 --> 00:23:21,639
Speaker 3: beginning of a relationship with the n it was a

513
00:23:21,680 --> 00:23:23,600
Speaker 3: good Christian book, and I thought it was a little serious,

514
00:23:23,600 --> 00:23:25,400
Speaker 3: but I also respected it. Look look at this man

515
00:23:25,480 --> 00:23:27,920
Speaker 3: reading a good Christian how to Become a Husband's book.

516
00:23:28,359 --> 00:23:31,160
Speaker 3: So it kind of implied to me that he was.

517
00:23:30,920 --> 00:23:32,520
Speaker 1: Preparing for something that mattered.

518
00:23:33,040 --> 00:23:35,480
Speaker 3: And I think if we were taking a test in school,

519
00:23:35,840 --> 00:23:37,439
Speaker 3: or you know, if something important was coming up, like

520
00:23:37,480 --> 00:23:39,480
Speaker 3: an sat if you wanted to get into that college,

521
00:23:39,760 --> 00:23:43,199
Speaker 3: you would prepare with your inner knowledge and so in

522
00:23:43,240 --> 00:23:46,280
Speaker 3: your wisdom. And so I think in adulthood there's many things,

523
00:23:46,359 --> 00:23:50,240
Speaker 3: there's lots less things that challenge us to prepare to

524
00:23:50,320 --> 00:23:54,160
Speaker 3: pour into and so we lose the idea of gaining

525
00:23:54,200 --> 00:23:58,120
Speaker 3: knowledge and tolerance or you know, like all of those

526
00:23:58,119 --> 00:24:00,879
Speaker 3: things in order to prepare. But it's like having a baby,

527
00:24:00,880 --> 00:24:03,199
Speaker 3: like we just said, super important, right, how to be

528
00:24:03,240 --> 00:24:05,440
Speaker 3: prepared for that. If you plan on being married, it

529
00:24:05,520 --> 00:24:08,320
Speaker 3: being a long term relationship, again important, how to prepare

530
00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:10,080
Speaker 3: for that. But we just think we're fucking just find

531
00:24:10,080 --> 00:24:13,159
Speaker 3: winging it. And then now your kids ten and you're

532
00:24:13,160 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 3: trying to figure out how to say no because you didn't.

533
00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:19,040
Speaker 2: Read the books before you had the baby. So yes,

534
00:24:19,200 --> 00:24:20,440
Speaker 2: I agree with book reading.

535
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:22,800
Speaker 7: My next one's kind of like a two parter.

536
00:24:23,600 --> 00:24:26,240
Speaker 5: The first part of this is, wherever you are financially

537
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:30,240
Speaker 5: in alive, plan on making more money when you're about

538
00:24:30,280 --> 00:24:32,440
Speaker 5: to get in that relationship, or if you're in a relationship,

539
00:24:32,480 --> 00:24:36,080
Speaker 5: plan on trying to somehow some way make more money financially.

540
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:39,399
Speaker 5: It's a money driven world. But the other part about

541
00:24:39,440 --> 00:24:42,359
Speaker 5: this is plan that vacation because I feel like a

542
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:45,240
Speaker 5: vacation is a fast track to finding out if you

543
00:24:45,280 --> 00:24:47,159
Speaker 5: can be with this person because it puts you in

544
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:50,040
Speaker 5: a lot of this is different scenarios outside of your

545
00:24:50,040 --> 00:24:52,560
Speaker 5: comfort zone, and then you have to see if you

546
00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:56,520
Speaker 5: and your partner can then operate within this space that

547
00:24:56,600 --> 00:24:57,200
Speaker 5: is both.

548
00:24:57,040 --> 00:24:58,000
Speaker 7: New to both of y'all.

549
00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:02,480
Speaker 3: I do agree with that environment just you two. So

550
00:25:02,520 --> 00:25:04,440
Speaker 3: then there are challenges that may come up, and then

551
00:25:04,440 --> 00:25:08,639
Speaker 3: you can see if your problem skills problem solving skills together.

552
00:25:08,840 --> 00:25:12,399
Speaker 5: Every single vacation I've ever done has ended tragically except

553
00:25:12,400 --> 00:25:15,000
Speaker 5: for Jamila, and that's how I knew the shoes my person.

554
00:25:16,920 --> 00:25:18,760
Speaker 2: I mean, I think that's also like for people that

555
00:25:18,800 --> 00:25:20,960
Speaker 2: are considering coming on the trip and think, oh, I'm

556
00:25:21,040 --> 00:25:23,919
Speaker 2: just like just started dating someone, this is actually the

557
00:25:24,000 --> 00:25:26,800
Speaker 2: perfect place to come and test out and see if

558
00:25:26,840 --> 00:25:30,040
Speaker 2: this is if this is right, if it feels good,

559
00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:33,080
Speaker 2: if you guys can adventure together, if you guys can,

560
00:25:33,119 --> 00:25:35,919
Speaker 2: like you said, problem solve together, if you can have

561
00:25:36,000 --> 00:25:39,320
Speaker 2: fun together, if your interests are similar, and if they're not,

562
00:25:39,440 --> 00:25:41,800
Speaker 2: are you open to expanding your interest for your partner

563
00:25:41,840 --> 00:25:43,560
Speaker 2: and being open to and being open.

564
00:25:43,960 --> 00:25:45,760
Speaker 3: This would even be like a good first trip. I

565
00:25:45,760 --> 00:25:47,760
Speaker 3: think sometimes people think couples are treating.

566
00:25:47,640 --> 00:25:50,159
Speaker 1: WHOA, they think I'd be married, like.

567
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:53,000
Speaker 3: It almost like it's couples counseling now, but it's not.

568
00:25:53,400 --> 00:25:56,320
Speaker 3: It's like a group trip, but it's also grounded in

569
00:25:56,800 --> 00:26:00,560
Speaker 3: having fun, deepening intimacy and connection. So if you're early

570
00:26:00,640 --> 00:26:03,399
Speaker 3: on in your relationship, like super early, like me and Orlando.

571
00:26:03,400 --> 00:26:05,720
Speaker 3: When we met four weeks later, we went to a

572
00:26:05,720 --> 00:26:06,960
Speaker 3: different country for a week.

573
00:26:06,840 --> 00:26:07,880
Speaker 9: Not knowing each other at all.

574
00:26:08,040 --> 00:26:10,600
Speaker 3: It's crazy idea, I thought, But it ended up being

575
00:26:10,800 --> 00:26:12,359
Speaker 3: one of the best things we could have done because

576
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:14,840
Speaker 3: immediately I was like, you're my travel boyfriend. But I

577
00:26:14,880 --> 00:26:19,840
Speaker 3: think that people put people overthink pouring into your relationship

578
00:26:19,840 --> 00:26:22,600
Speaker 3: in the beginning, because that already tells the universe. I

579
00:26:22,640 --> 00:26:25,280
Speaker 3: don't even know if it's gonna work versus like, what

580
00:26:25,359 --> 00:26:27,679
Speaker 3: are we both here for. Let's just do something crazy

581
00:26:27,680 --> 00:26:29,960
Speaker 3: and like invest in going on a trip and doing

582
00:26:30,040 --> 00:26:30,919
Speaker 3: something fun together.

583
00:26:31,160 --> 00:26:34,560
Speaker 10: Well, I think most times people think of those investments

584
00:26:34,600 --> 00:26:37,879
Speaker 10: that are a couple thousand dollars a lot five days,

585
00:26:38,160 --> 00:26:40,080
Speaker 10: and they think it has to be put into something

586
00:26:40,119 --> 00:26:43,480
Speaker 10: that's always supposed to last forever. Every big investment is

587
00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:45,359
Speaker 10: supposed to be in the one that lasts forever. And

588
00:26:45,400 --> 00:26:47,720
Speaker 10: the truth is, you don't know who the fuck or

589
00:26:47,720 --> 00:26:49,639
Speaker 10: what the fuck is gonna last forever. And if you

590
00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:52,760
Speaker 10: can just accept that and receive that every opportunity has

591
00:26:52,840 --> 00:26:56,280
Speaker 10: medicine in it that's gonna last you forever. Then it

592
00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:58,679
Speaker 10: doesn't matter who the fuck you're with right now. And

593
00:26:58,720 --> 00:27:00,359
Speaker 10: if you're within five years down the line and you're

594
00:27:00,359 --> 00:27:03,000
Speaker 10: still doing some of the practices we give you, that's great.

595
00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:04,920
Speaker 10: And if not, and if you're using it for somebody else,

596
00:27:04,960 --> 00:27:06,800
Speaker 10: but you needed this person to prove to yourself that

597
00:27:06,840 --> 00:27:10,320
Speaker 10: you could do it, we need these things too. So yeah,

598
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,800
Speaker 10: allow the levity to be in vacation, and that's important.

599
00:27:14,200 --> 00:27:16,760
Speaker 5: And you could always learn something because those women that

600
00:27:16,800 --> 00:27:19,080
Speaker 5: didn't work out. I definitely learned something and applied to

601
00:27:19,840 --> 00:27:22,520
Speaker 5: my relationship with Jimihilla in the beginning, because I knew

602
00:27:22,520 --> 00:27:28,720
Speaker 5: nothing about brunch. Not yeah, this girl put me on

603
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:31,040
Speaker 5: to brunch. She was a terrible girlfriend, but she put

604
00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:31,359
Speaker 5: me on too.

605
00:27:32,200 --> 00:27:34,200
Speaker 1: I knew nothing about over.

606
00:27:34,680 --> 00:27:37,280
Speaker 5: No no, I slept the first night me and Mila met.

607
00:27:37,440 --> 00:27:39,280
Speaker 5: I slept over and I looked at her and I

608
00:27:39,320 --> 00:27:40,440
Speaker 5: was like, you want to go to.

609
00:27:40,400 --> 00:27:42,040
Speaker 9: Brunch the first meal of the day. That's where the

610
00:27:42,040 --> 00:27:44,920
Speaker 9: bitch talked. You bitches loved to eat in the morning.

611
00:27:45,280 --> 00:27:46,560
Speaker 7: That's what she said. I was like, you want to

612
00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:48,639
Speaker 7: go to brunch, went to brunch and there's a perfect

613
00:27:48,640 --> 00:27:49,320
Speaker 7: start to the day.

614
00:27:49,680 --> 00:27:52,159
Speaker 9: Honestly, he ordered me the steak and eggs, and I

615
00:27:52,200 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 9: was like, oh, he's not cheap either, and then I said, okay,

616
00:27:57,840 --> 00:27:58,879
Speaker 9: I'll go to the beach with you.

617
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:02,120
Speaker 5: Yeah, and men, men got to get back to peacocking

618
00:28:02,160 --> 00:28:03,959
Speaker 5: in the beginning. Like you know how birds when they

619
00:28:04,000 --> 00:28:05,919
Speaker 5: try to get a mate, they start doing them dances,

620
00:28:06,359 --> 00:28:07,760
Speaker 5: birds trying to show it off.

621
00:28:09,720 --> 00:28:18,560
Speaker 3: Can you insert one of those those bird mating.

622
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,120
Speaker 9: They do those for hours.

623
00:28:20,280 --> 00:28:22,119
Speaker 3: Yeah, the men need to go this is this is

624
00:28:22,160 --> 00:28:23,960
Speaker 3: about primal relationship dating.

625
00:28:24,320 --> 00:28:27,240
Speaker 9: They did a dance for hours. The birds many species.

626
00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:30,280
Speaker 5: Okay, go back to men like showing off for their partner,

627
00:28:30,359 --> 00:28:32,680
Speaker 5: not just showing off because they want the Instagram likes

628
00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:35,040
Speaker 5: and all the things like buying a whole bedroom of

629
00:28:35,080 --> 00:28:37,600
Speaker 5: flowers because they want to put it on Instagram. Show

630
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:41,760
Speaker 5: off just for specifically one person and then let everything

631
00:28:41,880 --> 00:28:43,000
Speaker 5: just fall into place.

632
00:28:43,040 --> 00:28:44,800
Speaker 7: But that's when we need to get into.

633
00:28:44,480 --> 00:28:47,000
Speaker 5: Men are sitting here with the table in front of

634
00:28:47,000 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 5: them asking women to bring stuff like this is crazy,

635
00:28:49,960 --> 00:28:52,160
Speaker 5: this is madness. What happened to what we used to

636
00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:54,400
Speaker 5: do for the women to show off that we actually

637
00:28:54,400 --> 00:28:55,960
Speaker 5: wanted them and how bad we wanted them.

638
00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:57,280
Speaker 7: And we need to get back to begging.

639
00:29:00,200 --> 00:29:02,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, I don't know about begging verbally, Well, we need

640
00:29:02,600 --> 00:29:03,479
Speaker 5: to beg with your actions.

641
00:29:03,480 --> 00:29:04,920
Speaker 7: Again, that's a good quest.

642
00:29:05,120 --> 00:29:09,920
Speaker 5: One that's just me specifically and how I think of

643
00:29:10,000 --> 00:29:12,360
Speaker 5: how I want to go about things. But we're waiting here,

644
00:29:12,520 --> 00:29:15,160
Speaker 5: sitting here and expecting people to just bring things that

645
00:29:15,240 --> 00:29:17,960
Speaker 5: will complete each other instead of just having an experience

646
00:29:18,000 --> 00:29:22,200
Speaker 5: together and just enjoying enjoying each other's presence and whatever

647
00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:24,840
Speaker 5: comes with comes with it.

648
00:29:25,720 --> 00:29:28,680
Speaker 3: You know, I'd like to say to just to tag

649
00:29:28,720 --> 00:29:33,640
Speaker 3: onto that about the begging. You know, as a former

650
00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:36,400
Speaker 3: hot girl in the streets, what I will say is

651
00:29:36,720 --> 00:29:39,920
Speaker 3: I always said, and I thought this was going to

652
00:29:39,920 --> 00:29:42,880
Speaker 3: protect me forever to ever having to commit was a

653
00:29:42,960 --> 00:29:44,840
Speaker 3: man is going to have to make it so clear

654
00:29:44,880 --> 00:29:48,040
Speaker 3: and obvious that he wants to be with me, because

655
00:29:48,120 --> 00:29:52,640
Speaker 3: I would never be the one to like really aggressively pursue,

656
00:29:52,680 --> 00:29:57,200
Speaker 3: because I always, even as as modern as I am,

657
00:29:57,240 --> 00:30:00,520
Speaker 3: I always feel like it was a man's duty to

658
00:30:00,600 --> 00:30:04,120
Speaker 3: kind of do the pursuit. And because I knew so

659
00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:06,080
Speaker 3: many niggas were not going to do.

660
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:08,880
Speaker 2: It, I was just like safe. I was like, I'm

661
00:30:08,920 --> 00:30:10,520
Speaker 2: never going to ask this nigga what we're doing here?

662
00:30:10,600 --> 00:30:13,360
Speaker 2: But honestly, most of the niggas I ever dated, including Orlando,

663
00:30:13,440 --> 00:30:16,040
Speaker 2: said so what are we doing here? Where are we

664
00:30:16,080 --> 00:30:16,840
Speaker 2: moving into anything?

665
00:30:16,840 --> 00:30:18,400
Speaker 9: And I was like, oh, the men were doing that

666
00:30:18,400 --> 00:30:19,920
Speaker 9: to you the other way around.

667
00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:20,320
Speaker 7: Yeah.

668
00:30:20,480 --> 00:30:23,920
Speaker 3: Always, it was not my mo to even ask this

669
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:26,280
Speaker 3: question because that was how I protected myself from ever

670
00:30:26,320 --> 00:30:28,560
Speaker 3: having to have any commitment. And every time someone did,

671
00:30:28,600 --> 00:30:30,960
Speaker 3: I was like fuck, and then I would like kind

672
00:30:30,960 --> 00:30:35,480
Speaker 3: of get into a relationship. But the truth is because

673
00:30:35,480 --> 00:30:37,360
Speaker 3: it was like a protection mechanism because I think a

674
00:30:37,400 --> 00:30:40,960
Speaker 3: lot of men don't stand on business and say, most

675
00:30:41,040 --> 00:30:43,200
Speaker 3: men are not like I want to be in a relationship.

676
00:30:43,680 --> 00:30:45,320
Speaker 3: So it kind of if you were a hot girl

677
00:30:45,360 --> 00:30:46,960
Speaker 3: like me, it kind of saves you from ever having

678
00:30:46,960 --> 00:30:49,160
Speaker 3: to like take the dive in. I don't really have

679
00:30:49,160 --> 00:30:50,560
Speaker 3: to stop sleeping with anybody else. I don't have to

680
00:30:50,560 --> 00:30:52,480
Speaker 3: stop dating because we didn't even have the conversation because

681
00:30:52,480 --> 00:30:54,240
Speaker 3: I'm not bringing it up and I know this man

682
00:30:54,280 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 3: is not going to because he's just a man. But

683
00:30:56,520 --> 00:31:00,400
Speaker 3: when it's real, a man is going to do all

684
00:31:00,440 --> 00:31:02,720
Speaker 3: the things by doing the bird dance.

685
00:31:03,960 --> 00:31:05,640
Speaker 9: And so that is why we're.

686
00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:08,520
Speaker 3: Here with both our men with in a relationship. Because

687
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:11,240
Speaker 3: Orlando was very clear and committed, and even though we

688
00:31:11,240 --> 00:31:13,640
Speaker 3: were on lots of mushrooms when he asked me, so,

689
00:31:13,640 --> 00:31:15,640
Speaker 3: what are we doing here? And I was like, nothing,

690
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:20,800
Speaker 3: what are you talking about. We're doing mushrooms, That's what

691
00:31:20,880 --> 00:31:23,320
Speaker 3: we're doing here. He's like, but you know, like, you know,

692
00:31:23,320 --> 00:31:24,720
Speaker 3: what do you see us? What do you see for

693
00:31:24,800 --> 00:31:28,520
Speaker 3: us in the future? And I said, babe, I saw

694
00:31:28,560 --> 00:31:30,440
Speaker 3: you sleep with like four girls at that sex party

695
00:31:30,520 --> 00:31:32,880
Speaker 3: last night. I don't think we're headed for any future.

696
00:31:33,520 --> 00:31:35,960
Speaker 3: But then he realized quickly that wasn't a good move,

697
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:40,440
Speaker 3: and he continued continued and continued, and continued to.

698
00:31:40,520 --> 00:31:41,360
Speaker 7: Be very.

699
00:31:43,520 --> 00:31:46,680
Speaker 3: Fourth right, persistent and forth right about what did he wanted,

700
00:31:46,720 --> 00:31:49,960
Speaker 3: and that was what Finally I was like, Okay, I'm

701
00:31:50,000 --> 00:31:51,560
Speaker 3: not going to be a bitch.

702
00:31:51,600 --> 00:31:53,160
Speaker 9: I'm going to start shifting too.

703
00:31:53,400 --> 00:31:55,600
Speaker 3: But I really needed someone to like pull me by

704
00:31:55,680 --> 00:31:57,560
Speaker 3: the hand and say, yeah, bitch, this is the way

705
00:31:57,600 --> 00:31:58,000
Speaker 3: we're going.

706
00:31:58,280 --> 00:32:00,720
Speaker 5: Yeah, don't worry about all the mothers girls I was

707
00:32:00,760 --> 00:32:03,080
Speaker 5: bird dancing for I'm bird dancing for you right now.

708
00:32:04,200 --> 00:32:06,520
Speaker 9: I think, is what kind of backwood is this?

709
00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:09,560
Speaker 1: That is the aromatic la?

710
00:32:10,400 --> 00:32:11,400
Speaker 9: Oh wow?

711
00:32:12,400 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 2: Yes, this is for the la babies, and it I

712
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:19,000
Speaker 2: know I was, I was gonna bite that off very aggressively,

713
00:32:19,040 --> 00:32:23,120
Speaker 2: but I didn't know if that was sexy or not. Yeah,

714
00:32:23,320 --> 00:32:25,920
Speaker 2: I've been I've been smoking these aromatic ones lately because

715
00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:28,479
Speaker 2: because you're nice, I got a peck. They're smooth, right,

716
00:32:28,480 --> 00:32:29,440
Speaker 2: and they're limited edition.

717
00:32:31,160 --> 00:32:33,920
Speaker 1: I think they are limited to edition, just like you

718
00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:34,440
Speaker 1: look in the back.

719
00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:38,880
Speaker 2: It's a limited Yes, you're right, limited edition, just like me. Okay,

720
00:32:38,920 --> 00:32:40,120
Speaker 2: sorry to interrupt, you keep going.

721
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:41,160
Speaker 1: I was gonna say, I.

722
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:45,200
Speaker 2: Think with me and she Cam it was it was similar,

723
00:32:45,240 --> 00:32:48,120
Speaker 2: but it wasn't like I think because I had just

724
00:32:48,120 --> 00:32:50,720
Speaker 2: coming out come out of a relationship and I was

725
00:32:50,760 --> 00:32:52,760
Speaker 2: really like, I don't.

726
00:32:52,600 --> 00:32:53,200
Speaker 9: Know, I was.

727
00:32:54,080 --> 00:32:58,440
Speaker 2: I was a bit damaged, traumatized, traumatize and not damaged,

728
00:32:58,520 --> 00:33:06,800
Speaker 2: but I I was raw, I would say. And he

729
00:33:06,880 --> 00:33:10,320
Speaker 2: was gently persistent, and I, like I told you, like

730
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:12,320
Speaker 2: early on, I didn't even know he was pursuing me

731
00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,880
Speaker 2: because I was just like, he's just nice and he's

732
00:33:16,200 --> 00:33:18,080
Speaker 2: nice and he wants He keeps asking me to do

733
00:33:18,160 --> 00:33:22,720
Speaker 2: things every time. Every time we're together, he asks when

734
00:33:22,760 --> 00:33:24,680
Speaker 2: we're going to see each other and makes the date

735
00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:28,560
Speaker 2: like right then and there, and I needed that. I

736
00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:31,280
Speaker 2: really I didn't think that's what I needed. But I

737
00:33:31,320 --> 00:33:35,080
Speaker 2: did need someone that was consistent. And and I think

738
00:33:35,080 --> 00:33:40,160
Speaker 2: that that I guess pecocking or whatever you want to

739
00:33:40,160 --> 00:33:43,560
Speaker 2: call it, or just the pursuit. The pursuit looks different

740
00:33:44,040 --> 00:33:47,560
Speaker 2: for every man, right, Like your pursuit is different than

741
00:33:47,560 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 2: his pursuit.

742
00:33:50,200 --> 00:33:52,480
Speaker 3: His pursuit was soft. You know, for a year, I

743
00:33:52,560 --> 00:33:54,440
Speaker 3: was fucking around. I moved a man in the dog

744
00:33:54,520 --> 00:33:55,840
Speaker 3: in for a couple of months and then he was

745
00:33:55,880 --> 00:33:57,800
Speaker 3: just like, bitch, i'll call you back. And I tried

746
00:33:57,800 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 3: to break up with him and he said I'll call

747
00:33:59,200 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 3: you back.

748
00:33:59,640 --> 00:34:03,080
Speaker 9: You know. So there is there's different styles in what

749
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:03,600
Speaker 9: you can be.

750
00:34:03,800 --> 00:34:06,200
Speaker 3: What I mean, yeah, I pursue, but I do think

751
00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:12,160
Speaker 3: for the feminine, we need the masculine to lead and to.

752
00:34:12,160 --> 00:34:13,440
Speaker 9: Say I'm choosing you.

753
00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:16,560
Speaker 3: We need to hear that I'm choosing you and I

754
00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:18,919
Speaker 3: want you and like I don't care what you're talking about,

755
00:34:18,920 --> 00:34:20,960
Speaker 3: because bitches are going to talk, because we're going to

756
00:34:21,040 --> 00:34:24,080
Speaker 3: test you because it's in our DNA to be like

757
00:34:24,080 --> 00:34:24,640
Speaker 3: how about now?

758
00:34:24,760 --> 00:34:25,399
Speaker 9: How about now?

759
00:34:25,719 --> 00:34:27,080
Speaker 3: And I know most men are going to hear this

760
00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:29,359
Speaker 3: and be like very irritated by me saying this, But

761
00:34:29,480 --> 00:34:31,279
Speaker 3: I think that it's a part of our job to

762
00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:34,359
Speaker 3: kind of know that you have tolerance and you have

763
00:34:34,440 --> 00:34:37,279
Speaker 3: the drive to pursue me, and after one you know

764
00:34:37,400 --> 00:34:39,399
Speaker 3: one thing, it's not going to just falter and you're

765
00:34:39,400 --> 00:34:41,040
Speaker 3: going to go to the next bitch, because there are

766
00:34:41,040 --> 00:34:42,920
Speaker 3: a lot of bitches, and there's more beautiful bitches in

767
00:34:43,000 --> 00:34:45,080
Speaker 3: us and more beautiful bitches in them. And so I

768
00:34:45,080 --> 00:34:46,880
Speaker 3: think when you choose someone, it has to be so

769
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:48,120
Speaker 3: verbal and out loud.

770
00:34:48,160 --> 00:34:49,400
Speaker 9: You can't be like, well, I gave you flaw. It

771
00:34:49,520 --> 00:34:50,399
Speaker 9: was two days in a week.

772
00:34:50,719 --> 00:34:53,840
Speaker 3: You know, you got to be like, hey, bitch, you're mine.

773
00:34:54,640 --> 00:34:56,200
Speaker 3: I want you to know I want to work on this.

774
00:34:58,160 --> 00:34:59,400
Speaker 1: Do you think that most men know that?

775
00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:05,880
Speaker 6: First of all, I think most men should hear what

776
00:35:05,920 --> 00:35:07,120
Speaker 6: you just said. I don't.

777
00:35:07,200 --> 00:35:10,080
Speaker 10: I think most men may know it innately. I think

778
00:35:10,160 --> 00:35:13,280
Speaker 10: men who are pursuing women that they see a future

779
00:35:13,320 --> 00:35:18,080
Speaker 10: with will find ways to verbalize it from where they're at.

780
00:35:18,320 --> 00:35:20,479
Speaker 10: I think I choose you as a beautiful thing to say.

781
00:35:20,560 --> 00:35:20,759
Speaker 7: You know.

782
00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:24,800
Speaker 10: So, I'm curious I'm going to answer that question whether

783
00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:27,359
Speaker 10: most men know that. I'm not sure. I think we

784
00:35:27,400 --> 00:35:29,359
Speaker 10: innately know. You guys have to be taken seriously. But

785
00:35:29,400 --> 00:35:31,600
Speaker 10: what does it make you, guys feel like when a

786
00:35:31,640 --> 00:35:33,479
Speaker 10: man says that, why is it those words that.

787
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:34,560
Speaker 6: It's just said something.

788
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:37,040
Speaker 2: The first word that came to mind is it disarms me.

789
00:35:37,920 --> 00:35:40,440
Speaker 2: It's there's like a there's a wall that immediately goes.

790
00:35:40,320 --> 00:35:44,040
Speaker 3: Dirt, dirt, dirt that we are that we innately already

791
00:35:44,080 --> 00:35:46,200
Speaker 3: have around us because it's a protective army.

792
00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:53,000
Speaker 2: So when hearing those words is extremely impactful, it's important

793
00:35:53,320 --> 00:35:56,120
Speaker 2: and it does like I remember, I remember when you

794
00:35:56,120 --> 00:35:56,440
Speaker 2: said it.

795
00:35:56,480 --> 00:35:58,360
Speaker 1: I can I remember exactly where we were. We're in

796
00:35:58,400 --> 00:35:59,479
Speaker 1: the car in front of your.

797
00:35:59,360 --> 00:36:01,440
Speaker 2: House, and I think I was like I would think,

798
00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:05,040
Speaker 2: I was like because I was confused, not confused, but what.

799
00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:09,320
Speaker 9: Are these words?

800
00:36:14,760 --> 00:36:17,799
Speaker 1: And you said that I'm choosing you. I want to

801
00:36:17,840 --> 00:36:19,120
Speaker 1: be with you, I'm choosing you.

802
00:36:19,760 --> 00:36:22,880
Speaker 2: And immediately there was like a rush of relief that

803
00:36:22,960 --> 00:36:24,719
Speaker 2: came over that there was no more confusion.

804
00:36:24,800 --> 00:36:26,839
Speaker 1: It was just exactly and.

805
00:36:26,840 --> 00:36:28,600
Speaker 2: The confusion was on my own. It wasn't because of

806
00:36:28,640 --> 00:36:29,560
Speaker 2: anything that you had done.

807
00:36:29,600 --> 00:36:30,600
Speaker 1: It it was me.

808
00:36:30,800 --> 00:36:37,000
Speaker 2: It was like me, I think needing that and also

809
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:42,399
Speaker 2: never receiving it, and from anybody really, it's always been

810
00:36:42,440 --> 00:36:46,879
Speaker 2: like just I guess insinuated or it's like yeah, we're

811
00:36:46,880 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 2: together now, you know. And I think hearing those words

812
00:36:51,120 --> 00:36:56,120
Speaker 2: from you was like, it's like a rapid healing for

813
00:36:56,239 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 2: me in this relationship. And I think so many women

814
00:37:00,000 --> 00:37:01,960
Speaker 2: feel the same way. And I think even women that

815
00:37:02,000 --> 00:37:04,920
Speaker 2: have been in long term relationships are sometimes even confused

816
00:37:05,000 --> 00:37:08,000
Speaker 2: whether they've been chosen. They're like, I know we're I'm here,

817
00:37:08,080 --> 00:37:10,480
Speaker 2: but like, how did we get here? Like are you

818
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:11,759
Speaker 2: still choosing me in this.

819
00:37:11,760 --> 00:37:13,960
Speaker 1: Version of who I am right now? Because there's going to.

820
00:37:14,000 --> 00:37:17,240
Speaker 2: Be more choosing that has to happen beyond the first time,

821
00:37:17,760 --> 00:37:20,400
Speaker 2: I think throughout your relationship, because hopefully you're always growing

822
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:23,759
Speaker 2: and hopefully you're always expanding, and hopefully that person is

823
00:37:24,400 --> 00:37:25,960
Speaker 2: you know, going to stay eye to eye with you

824
00:37:26,000 --> 00:37:28,360
Speaker 2: in the moments where like maybe you guys are growing

825
00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:30,719
Speaker 2: at different stages, but they're going to say, I'm still

826
00:37:30,800 --> 00:37:34,160
Speaker 2: choosing you. I'm still choosing you, And so I think

827
00:37:34,200 --> 00:37:37,719
Speaker 2: it's the first one is important. But I think now

828
00:37:37,719 --> 00:37:40,640
Speaker 2: that I've received it, I know and that and you know,

829
00:37:40,680 --> 00:37:42,640
Speaker 2: we're a year into our relationship, but I know that

830
00:37:43,440 --> 00:37:48,000
Speaker 2: I will probably need that multiple times throughout our journey.

831
00:37:48,360 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 5: If I can answer your question, I think.

832
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:54,480
Speaker 3: She's a question to us about what does that make

833
00:37:54,520 --> 00:37:58,440
Speaker 3: us feel like that oh that we need that.

834
00:37:59,480 --> 00:38:02,520
Speaker 2: I asked him that, and then he asked us what

835
00:38:02,600 --> 00:38:05,279
Speaker 2: does that feel like to us when it's on?

836
00:38:05,440 --> 00:38:06,600
Speaker 7: It's said, Oh.

837
00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:07,960
Speaker 3: I was gonna say one more thing before you go.

838
00:38:08,320 --> 00:38:14,800
Speaker 3: I was gonna say. I think it's the beginning of safety.

839
00:38:14,960 --> 00:38:17,839
Speaker 3: It creates a container that feels safe. Like, oh, he's

840
00:38:17,840 --> 00:38:20,279
Speaker 3: telling me he chooses me, so then like, yes, I

841
00:38:20,280 --> 00:38:22,600
Speaker 3: can disarm. And also like it's the beginning of like

842
00:38:22,760 --> 00:38:23,960
Speaker 3: you know, when you get into a plane and then

843
00:38:23,960 --> 00:38:25,799
Speaker 3: you start taking shoes off, and then like you get

844
00:38:25,800 --> 00:38:27,400
Speaker 3: into like a long road trip, but you got to

845
00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:29,719
Speaker 3: kind of get situated, put your cut down, make sure

846
00:38:29,719 --> 00:38:32,600
Speaker 3: you got the blanket, like you like, putting your seatbelt on,

847
00:38:33,719 --> 00:38:35,520
Speaker 3: and then you're like, you know, putting the you're putting

848
00:38:35,520 --> 00:38:37,319
Speaker 3: the rear view of the garage is going up, and

849
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:39,359
Speaker 3: you're like, now you can drive.

850
00:38:39,640 --> 00:38:39,880
Speaker 9: You know.

851
00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:45,759
Speaker 3: It's like women really need a level of safety. And actually,

852
00:38:46,040 --> 00:38:48,480
Speaker 3: Adventure Bay gave me that analogy about getting in the car,

853
00:38:48,560 --> 00:38:51,239
Speaker 3: putting your seatbelt on and like getting situated before you

854
00:38:51,280 --> 00:38:53,719
Speaker 3: start driving. And he was like, even though he was

855
00:38:53,760 --> 00:38:55,400
Speaker 3: not my person, he was someone who did make me

856
00:38:55,400 --> 00:38:57,520
Speaker 3: feel safe in that space, and that was like me,

857
00:38:57,920 --> 00:39:01,680
Speaker 3: I recognize that that I'm choosing you is like the

858
00:39:01,719 --> 00:39:06,480
Speaker 3: beginning of like, oh, okay, you know, and then starting

859
00:39:06,480 --> 00:39:07,000
Speaker 3: this journey.

860
00:39:07,000 --> 00:39:09,759
Speaker 2: I felt lighter immediately after I drove off. I think

861
00:39:09,760 --> 00:39:11,720
Speaker 2: I dropped you off and then I remember getting driving

862
00:39:11,719 --> 00:39:16,520
Speaker 2: for my car and be like okay, we got that

863
00:39:16,560 --> 00:39:18,640
Speaker 2: out of the way, out of the way. But like

864
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:23,120
Speaker 2: once that's clear, like okay, now let's start another Yeah,

865
00:39:23,200 --> 00:39:24,680
Speaker 2: let's start living in this new chapter.

866
00:39:24,960 --> 00:39:28,800
Speaker 9: Like let's you know, so, okay, what were we gonna say, babe?

867
00:39:28,840 --> 00:39:30,239
Speaker 7: Sorry, no, I was gonna say that.

868
00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:34,000
Speaker 5: I don't know if men necessarily like no it, but

869
00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:37,879
Speaker 5: they start to once they see an example of it.

870
00:39:37,920 --> 00:39:41,480
Speaker 5: That's when they know, right, Like for me, I always

871
00:39:41,480 --> 00:39:43,319
Speaker 5: saw a bad example, so I just knew like what

872
00:39:43,480 --> 00:39:45,680
Speaker 5: not to do. But once I saw an example of

873
00:39:45,719 --> 00:39:47,759
Speaker 5: like how to go about loving a woman and how

874
00:39:47,800 --> 00:39:50,759
Speaker 5: to go about showing a person that you really want them,

875
00:39:50,800 --> 00:39:53,040
Speaker 5: that's when I automatically knew how I wanted to go

876
00:39:53,080 --> 00:39:53,480
Speaker 5: about it.

877
00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:56,400
Speaker 10: Say, for instance, my brother, can I interject to me,

878
00:39:56,360 --> 00:39:58,759
Speaker 10: I ask you a question, Yeah, just for the young

879
00:39:58,840 --> 00:40:02,040
Speaker 10: kings out there, how does man show a woman that

880
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,080
Speaker 10: they're interested in them because I think in the beginning,

881
00:40:04,800 --> 00:40:06,560
Speaker 10: as little boys, we play and we push them to

882
00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:11,239
Speaker 10: the ground because our lack of verbal ability, you know,

883
00:40:11,239 --> 00:40:13,160
Speaker 10: it disables us from being able to verbalize it properly.

884
00:40:13,160 --> 00:40:15,000
Speaker 10: And then so but surely as we learn how to talk,

885
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:17,120
Speaker 10: still don't really ever break that barrier.

886
00:40:18,640 --> 00:40:21,960
Speaker 6: So was that a red shirt?

887
00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:23,920
Speaker 7: All right? Right?

888
00:40:24,360 --> 00:40:25,520
Speaker 6: Just for the kings out there?

889
00:40:25,840 --> 00:40:28,040
Speaker 5: So all right, So my mom and my dad they

890
00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:30,200
Speaker 5: had like a very bad relationship. So I was used

891
00:40:30,239 --> 00:40:31,920
Speaker 5: to say, like, oh, as long as I do the

892
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:35,120
Speaker 5: opposite of them, then like I'll be fine. But it

893
00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:37,920
Speaker 5: didn't necessarily like translate because I didn't know actually what

894
00:40:38,000 --> 00:40:38,200
Speaker 5: to do.

895
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:40,520
Speaker 7: I was just doing the opposite. That was what I saw.

896
00:40:40,640 --> 00:40:43,160
Speaker 5: But then when I had a Auden uncle who were

897
00:40:43,280 --> 00:40:45,319
Speaker 5: madly in love with each other, and he was the

898
00:40:45,360 --> 00:40:47,839
Speaker 5: first one to let me know, like, oh, my woman

899
00:40:47,840 --> 00:40:50,360
Speaker 5: can go out and wear whatever she wants because I

900
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:52,319
Speaker 5: know she's still loyal and loves me and she's coming

901
00:40:52,320 --> 00:40:55,080
Speaker 5: back here where as before. But like, my woman can't

902
00:40:55,120 --> 00:40:57,080
Speaker 5: go out wear all that. My woman can't go out

903
00:40:57,160 --> 00:40:59,239
Speaker 5: late at night. And he would be like, regardless of

904
00:40:59,239 --> 00:41:01,839
Speaker 5: whatever she does, I'm still gonna love her and that's

905
00:41:01,840 --> 00:41:05,880
Speaker 5: when I first understood a new unconditional love. Then I

906
00:41:05,880 --> 00:41:08,319
Speaker 5: had to figure out how that works and translates for me.

907
00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:10,880
Speaker 5: So like I'm not the type to like wait for

908
00:41:10,920 --> 00:41:11,960
Speaker 5: a woman's wall to come down.

909
00:41:12,000 --> 00:41:14,799
Speaker 7: I'll just climb the wall. I'll climb the one right

910
00:41:15,000 --> 00:41:15,520
Speaker 7: big wall.

911
00:41:15,560 --> 00:41:18,879
Speaker 5: All right, all right, I love you and I'm here

912
00:41:19,000 --> 00:41:21,520
Speaker 5: now and I And then that's when I learned from

913
00:41:21,520 --> 00:41:25,880
Speaker 5: myself that I showed love by like example. Right first

914
00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:29,719
Speaker 5: time me and Mila hung out, we slept over and

915
00:41:29,719 --> 00:41:32,160
Speaker 5: we just shrooms. I was just like I just I

916
00:41:32,320 --> 00:41:34,000
Speaker 5: say whatever comes to me. So I would look at

917
00:41:34,000 --> 00:41:35,480
Speaker 5: her just I was rubbing her, and I was like,

918
00:41:35,719 --> 00:41:36,440
Speaker 5: I'm your blessing.

919
00:41:38,360 --> 00:41:39,800
Speaker 7: Climb the big wall. I'm your blessing.

920
00:41:39,960 --> 00:41:44,040
Speaker 5: If I made it this far, I mean something to you.

921
00:41:44,080 --> 00:41:49,960
Speaker 7: But my whole thing is always to like motes and crocodiles.

922
00:41:52,160 --> 00:41:56,040
Speaker 5: My whole thing is always like being an example, and

923
00:41:56,360 --> 00:41:58,319
Speaker 5: like I'm gonna say that I'm your blessing, and then

924
00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:00,239
Speaker 5: I'm going to show you how many different ways like

925
00:42:00,280 --> 00:42:03,399
Speaker 5: I can bless you. And then you choose to go

926
00:42:03,440 --> 00:42:04,840
Speaker 5: about it however you want to go about it. Do

927
00:42:04,840 --> 00:42:06,880
Speaker 5: you want to really take on this blessing, or you

928
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:09,000
Speaker 5: want to just keep your wall up and then just

929
00:42:09,800 --> 00:42:11,600
Speaker 5: figure it out with somebody else. But guess what, I

930
00:42:11,640 --> 00:42:13,680
Speaker 5: just climbed the wall. I showed you I can climb

931
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:15,719
Speaker 5: the wall. And then that was just always my way.

932
00:42:15,760 --> 00:42:18,359
Speaker 5: And then after that was because I saw my own

933
00:42:18,440 --> 00:42:21,560
Speaker 5: and uncle have this like unconditional love. I just exemplified

934
00:42:21,560 --> 00:42:24,279
Speaker 5: it unconditional love in my own way by letting her know,

935
00:42:24,360 --> 00:42:25,719
Speaker 5: whatever you do, I will still love you.

936
00:42:26,480 --> 00:42:29,080
Speaker 7: So I didn't. I didn't. I don't have a way

937
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:32,120
Speaker 7: of like, hey, these are the steps to go about,

938
00:42:32,239 --> 00:42:34,000
Speaker 7: and this is how you're supposed to show love. But

939
00:42:34,080 --> 00:42:35,080
Speaker 7: I knew once.

940
00:42:34,880 --> 00:42:38,000
Speaker 5: I saw what it looked like to love a woman,

941
00:42:38,160 --> 00:42:41,120
Speaker 5: I knew how to put it in my own words.

942
00:42:41,239 --> 00:42:44,040
Speaker 3: That's crazy that for boys, the default is you can't

943
00:42:44,080 --> 00:42:46,000
Speaker 3: let it whereever she wants, she can't go out too

944
00:42:46,080 --> 00:42:48,320
Speaker 3: late with her friends. Like that's the programming you already

945
00:42:48,320 --> 00:42:50,200
Speaker 3: come with, and it's until you literally see.

946
00:42:50,000 --> 00:42:51,680
Speaker 7: It see somebody else, cause you're already.

947
00:42:51,400 --> 00:42:54,080
Speaker 3: A free, pretty free, laid back guy. But they're like, oh,

948
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:56,040
Speaker 3: I don't have to trip about that. Yeah, you can

949
00:42:56,120 --> 00:42:58,200
Speaker 3: be chilling, and everybody's okay, you know what I mean

950
00:42:58,360 --> 00:43:00,239
Speaker 3: like you kind of you have to have seen it

951
00:43:00,680 --> 00:43:02,319
Speaker 3: to know that, oh, that's what I want to do

952
00:43:02,400 --> 00:43:04,719
Speaker 3: as a child, and as your brain develops, it's true

953
00:43:04,719 --> 00:43:06,759
Speaker 3: we need kind of like the visual there were like

954
00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:08,319
Speaker 3: I don't know, There's been certain times in my life

955
00:43:08,320 --> 00:43:10,960
Speaker 3: where I've seen women stay wild and have kind of

956
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:14,080
Speaker 3: like wild men, and I identified with that, like she's

957
00:43:14,160 --> 00:43:15,440
Speaker 3: kind of launching, so is he.

958
00:43:15,560 --> 00:43:16,360
Speaker 9: It's kind of works.

959
00:43:16,640 --> 00:43:19,040
Speaker 3: But if I hadn't seen that, I would have always

960
00:43:19,200 --> 00:43:21,480
Speaker 3: believed that I had to tighten up.

961
00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:23,680
Speaker 9: In order to be worthy, you know what I mean.

962
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:26,759
Speaker 3: So I had a clear vision because in little glimpses

963
00:43:27,080 --> 00:43:29,080
Speaker 3: you don't really see that on like a comedy, a

964
00:43:29,080 --> 00:43:31,160
Speaker 3: family comedy show at night or something like that. But

965
00:43:31,200 --> 00:43:33,600
Speaker 3: there are certain things that you can like as you

966
00:43:33,600 --> 00:43:36,680
Speaker 3: grew up, you remember you're taking plays out of everybody else's.

967
00:43:36,440 --> 00:43:38,120
Speaker 5: Book, and you got to you gotta look at the

968
00:43:38,200 --> 00:43:42,879
Speaker 5: relationships that are like outwardly obviously happy, not the ones

969
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:44,880
Speaker 5: that are just tolerating each other. And that's the difference

970
00:43:44,880 --> 00:43:47,359
Speaker 5: people think, because you know, they begins been together for

971
00:43:47,400 --> 00:43:49,200
Speaker 5: a long time and they're just tolerrating each other.

972
00:43:49,120 --> 00:43:49,600
Speaker 7: For a long time.

973
00:43:49,800 --> 00:43:51,160
Speaker 9: No, that's just the narrative that we.

974
00:43:51,239 --> 00:43:53,160
Speaker 5: Lengthiness of the relationship, right, it's not about the length

975
00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:55,520
Speaker 5: of relationship, like within that time, what have you done?

976
00:43:56,000 --> 00:43:57,840
Speaker 5: Like have you gone on a lot of vacations together?

977
00:43:57,960 --> 00:43:58,279
Speaker 7: Have you?

978
00:43:58,560 --> 00:44:00,840
Speaker 5: Do you when you see this this couple together, is

979
00:44:00,880 --> 00:44:03,359
Speaker 5: it like they're together but they argue together, Your an

980
00:44:03,480 --> 00:44:05,040
Speaker 5: uncles together for a long time, but they argument, or

981
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:08,120
Speaker 5: is like now I love that man over there, that's

982
00:44:08,360 --> 00:44:11,040
Speaker 5: that's mine, Like that's the kind of relationship that I

983
00:44:11,160 --> 00:44:13,799
Speaker 5: like try to exemplify and pay attention to. And we

984
00:44:13,800 --> 00:44:15,520
Speaker 5: don't necessarily see a lot of that. We just see

985
00:44:15,560 --> 00:44:18,440
Speaker 5: lengthy relationships, but not like outward loving relationships.

986
00:44:24,640 --> 00:44:31,040
Speaker 7: You like that, right, Give me for that one.

987
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:34,880
Speaker 9: Yeah, we went on. We just dropped a lot of gems,

988
00:44:34,920 --> 00:44:37,000
Speaker 9: you guys, and now we're high.

989
00:44:37,080 --> 00:44:40,400
Speaker 7: Yeah. I tried my best out here to be my best.

990
00:44:40,960 --> 00:44:43,600
Speaker 3: Are there are there any particular things outside of him

991
00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:47,719
Speaker 3: telling you I choose you that you remember, just for

992
00:44:47,840 --> 00:44:51,160
Speaker 3: actionable things for people who are like I haven't seen that.

993
00:44:51,239 --> 00:44:54,359
Speaker 3: Give me some examples that like outside of I choose you,

994
00:44:54,440 --> 00:44:56,719
Speaker 3: like actions or things or like a pivotal moment in

995
00:44:56,800 --> 00:44:59,560
Speaker 3: relationship where you were like that weight was lifted and

996
00:44:59,560 --> 00:45:01,680
Speaker 3: you're like, oh way, huh.

997
00:45:02,160 --> 00:45:08,399
Speaker 2: You know, like mm hmm um, there's been a lot

998
00:45:08,400 --> 00:45:11,719
Speaker 2: of moments. I mean there's been. I think Chackem's if

999
00:45:11,719 --> 00:45:14,840
Speaker 2: you can't tell, his energy is very calming, and so

1000
00:45:15,280 --> 00:45:17,920
Speaker 2: I think the way that Shakhem has been able to

1001
00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:21,880
Speaker 2: be my eye like the middle of a storm, like

1002
00:45:21,960 --> 00:45:25,359
Speaker 2: in chaos, no matter what, Like when I see him

1003
00:45:25,400 --> 00:45:28,839
Speaker 2: and I witness him and he walks into a room

1004
00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:31,919
Speaker 2: like everything kind of like grounds me down. I feel

1005
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:35,440
Speaker 2: like he has been kind of like a nervous system

1006
00:45:35,520 --> 00:45:39,680
Speaker 2: reset in human form for me, which is not something

1007
00:45:39,719 --> 00:45:43,040
Speaker 2: I've never experienced before. If anything, it's been the exact opposite.

1008
00:45:43,080 --> 00:45:45,080
Speaker 2: It's been like really disturbing to my.

1009
00:45:46,719 --> 00:45:50,600
Speaker 1: Or or or fleeting. I'm trying to think of this

1010
00:45:50,760 --> 00:45:52,240
Speaker 1: particular moment.

1011
00:45:55,080 --> 00:45:55,319
Speaker 5: Hmm.

1012
00:45:55,719 --> 00:45:59,239
Speaker 2: I'm high. You're putting me on the spot, say do

1013
00:45:59,280 --> 00:45:59,960
Speaker 2: you have any moments?

1014
00:46:00,160 --> 00:46:02,560
Speaker 1: But maybe I'm not thinking I'm come on through that.

1015
00:46:03,040 --> 00:46:04,719
Speaker 5: I mean, I agree with you on the comment and nervous.

1016
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:08,520
Speaker 5: He definitely comes my nervous. He's my space partner.

1017
00:46:09,360 --> 00:46:10,359
Speaker 7: We can take him right.

1018
00:46:11,480 --> 00:46:14,200
Speaker 5: But I can see it because I'm loud when I

1019
00:46:14,200 --> 00:46:16,720
Speaker 5: play spades and he don't say a word and I'm.

1020
00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:18,880
Speaker 7: Like, perfect, he's my balance.

1021
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:24,120
Speaker 5: But I can see it's really I can see how

1022
00:46:24,320 --> 00:46:30,840
Speaker 5: like the presence of energy is like always there, and

1023
00:46:30,960 --> 00:46:33,080
Speaker 5: it's it's it's like you're sure.

1024
00:46:33,920 --> 00:46:36,120
Speaker 7: Yeah, you come off as a very sure man.

1025
00:46:36,160 --> 00:46:37,880
Speaker 5: And there's a lot of men out here that not

1026
00:46:38,040 --> 00:46:40,720
Speaker 5: really are really just winging it and taking the advice

1027
00:46:40,760 --> 00:46:44,120
Speaker 5: of the ancestors or toxic advice of their like the

1028
00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:46,920
Speaker 5: men before them, and they really aren't as sure about

1029
00:46:46,960 --> 00:46:49,000
Speaker 5: what they're about to do or the decision they make.

1030
00:46:49,520 --> 00:46:52,040
Speaker 5: But you, when you it's not about the man coming

1031
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:54,279
Speaker 5: to you and saying like I choose you or whatever.

1032
00:46:54,320 --> 00:46:57,279
Speaker 5: It's the sureness that you feel behind it that lets

1033
00:46:57,320 --> 00:46:59,480
Speaker 5: you know like, oh, he means it's never.

1034
00:46:59,440 --> 00:47:02,399
Speaker 9: Word he said, there's no uncertainty. Yeah, And it's usually

1035
00:47:02,480 --> 00:47:03,320
Speaker 9: something very minor.

1036
00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:05,400
Speaker 3: I think I was just dropping a little off to

1037
00:47:05,440 --> 00:47:07,160
Speaker 3: school and I'm be hung up with the phone and

1038
00:47:07,200 --> 00:47:08,839
Speaker 3: I was just I don't know. It was like even

1039
00:47:08,880 --> 00:47:11,160
Speaker 3: before he lives here, and I was like, I don't

1040
00:47:11,160 --> 00:47:13,360
Speaker 3: have anything to worry about this Naka tells me everything.

1041
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:17,280
Speaker 3: And I was like, this is a crazy feeling, so weird.

1042
00:47:17,640 --> 00:47:18,319
Speaker 9: I was like, so weird.

1043
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:19,799
Speaker 3: I don't feel I got off the phone. I don't

1044
00:47:19,800 --> 00:47:22,480
Speaker 3: even feel I don't even feel anything. I don't you know,

1045
00:47:22,560 --> 00:47:24,400
Speaker 3: Like I'm so used to being a relationship. I'm like

1046
00:47:25,200 --> 00:47:27,640
Speaker 3: that it is lying or like something's just not that

1047
00:47:27,640 --> 00:47:31,000
Speaker 3: it is, something doesn't feel settled. I'm always wondering, am

1048
00:47:31,040 --> 00:47:31,279
Speaker 3: I like?

1049
00:47:31,320 --> 00:47:32,400
Speaker 9: Am I like? Does he like me?

1050
00:47:32,560 --> 00:47:34,759
Speaker 3: Or is there something else? Like I'm so used to

1051
00:47:34,840 --> 00:47:36,920
Speaker 3: having that feeling with men in general.

1052
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:40,080
Speaker 9: I was like, I've I noticed it. I was like, huh,

1053
00:47:40,160 --> 00:47:41,040
Speaker 9: this is crazy.

1054
00:47:41,440 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 2: I feel like she comes inquiry is always is something

1055
00:47:45,640 --> 00:47:50,160
Speaker 2: that made me know that, Like he asked me, He's

1056
00:47:50,200 --> 00:47:54,080
Speaker 2: asked me so many questions, Like he's genuinely very he's

1057
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:57,200
Speaker 2: a very curious person, as am I. But he's genuinely

1058
00:47:57,320 --> 00:48:00,279
Speaker 2: curious about me, and he wants to know me. And

1059
00:48:00,320 --> 00:48:02,839
Speaker 2: I think I've been in a lot of relationships that

1060
00:48:04,040 --> 00:48:06,680
Speaker 2: where the other person was doing a lot of fucking

1061
00:48:06,760 --> 00:48:10,040
Speaker 2: talking most of the time, And that's that's that's also

1062
00:48:10,200 --> 00:48:13,640
Speaker 2: like tells me informs me of like the what I

1063
00:48:13,680 --> 00:48:15,600
Speaker 2: was choosing in that in that moment or in those

1064
00:48:16,000 --> 00:48:18,880
Speaker 2: those years of dating in my life where I almost

1065
00:48:18,920 --> 00:48:21,320
Speaker 2: wanted a man to not ask me like I didn't

1066
00:48:21,680 --> 00:48:23,520
Speaker 2: I didn't even know if I had the answer until

1067
00:48:23,560 --> 00:48:27,400
Speaker 2: I was asked. And so I think there's that that

1068
00:48:27,480 --> 00:48:32,959
Speaker 2: has also been I think a true teller that I'm

1069
00:48:33,000 --> 00:48:34,960
Speaker 2: safe and that this is my person.

1070
00:48:35,640 --> 00:48:36,880
Speaker 1: And also I.

1071
00:48:36,880 --> 00:48:38,759
Speaker 2: Remember in Costa Rica there was a time on the

1072
00:48:38,880 --> 00:48:40,719
Speaker 2: on facetiming you were I don't know what we were

1073
00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:44,880
Speaker 2: talking about, but you said like, I'm I'm here to

1074
00:48:45,000 --> 00:48:48,959
Speaker 2: like show you that that's not here anymore, like I'm

1075
00:48:49,040 --> 00:48:52,480
Speaker 2: changing that for you, like you can trust that this

1076
00:48:52,600 --> 00:48:54,560
Speaker 2: is a safe space for you, and I'm here to

1077
00:48:54,600 --> 00:48:58,480
Speaker 2: show you that. And I was just like what I

1078
00:48:58,520 --> 00:49:00,680
Speaker 2: got off the phone, I was like, this man just

1079
00:49:00,719 --> 00:49:02,439
Speaker 2: tell me he's going to prove all these niggas wrong.

1080
00:49:03,920 --> 00:49:05,319
Speaker 1: Is that what he just said? He just thinks about

1081
00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:06,160
Speaker 1: to prove all these niggas wrong?

1082
00:49:06,239 --> 00:49:06,399
Speaker 7: Right?

1083
00:49:09,719 --> 00:49:13,279
Speaker 10: My goal is to prove your intuition right, because I

1084
00:49:13,320 --> 00:49:15,800
Speaker 10: know that there's certain things that y'all grow up knowing

1085
00:49:15,840 --> 00:49:18,360
Speaker 10: that you deserve, whether you saw it or not. And

1086
00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:22,080
Speaker 10: I think seeing embodied versions of it is important, like

1087
00:49:22,080 --> 00:49:25,040
Speaker 10: you said, and then sometimes it's not. It's like you

1088
00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:27,759
Speaker 10: have to figure that shit out because you know you're

1089
00:49:27,800 --> 00:49:31,120
Speaker 10: not wrong about it. So I appreciate your intuition for

1090
00:49:31,200 --> 00:49:34,000
Speaker 10: even allowing the space because a lot of women, I'm

1091
00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 10: not gonna lie, a lot of women are not even

1092
00:49:36,120 --> 00:49:41,640
Speaker 10: in space of fertility like that, they're in another space.

1093
00:49:41,880 --> 00:49:43,720
Speaker 10: They're in the space of healing and like they should

1094
00:49:43,760 --> 00:49:45,280
Speaker 10: be focused on themselves and still.

1095
00:49:45,160 --> 00:49:48,480
Speaker 6: Trying to date. And you have space for me.

1096
00:49:48,520 --> 00:49:50,520
Speaker 10: So I appreciate the work that you did and the

1097
00:49:50,560 --> 00:49:52,320
Speaker 10: space that you create for me to even.

1098
00:49:52,400 --> 00:49:54,200
Speaker 6: Show up that way, because you could have just told

1099
00:49:54,200 --> 00:49:58,960
Speaker 6: me to fuck off in that room. So I appreciate you.

1100
00:49:59,160 --> 00:50:01,799
Speaker 10: It was can't prove everybody wrong, but if we could

1101
00:50:01,800 --> 00:50:04,920
Speaker 10: prove one thing right, it's that y'all's intuition is asking

1102
00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:06,520
Speaker 10: for things that y'all probably deserve.

1103
00:50:08,640 --> 00:50:10,359
Speaker 5: I said something something like that to me, though before

1104
00:50:10,400 --> 00:50:12,759
Speaker 5: moment she was a little bit more assertive to her.

1105
00:50:13,000 --> 00:50:16,160
Speaker 5: She was just plaining about the relationships, plaining about something,

1106
00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:17,880
Speaker 5: and I told her, you're in love. You need to

1107
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:27,959
Speaker 5: start acting like it, this relationship ship. You're in fucking love,

1108
00:50:28,719 --> 00:50:29,440
Speaker 5: act like you are.

1109
00:50:29,600 --> 00:50:32,920
Speaker 10: Well, I think we should mention how difficult it is

1110
00:50:33,600 --> 00:50:36,680
Speaker 10: to just completely switch a paradigm like that. Yeah, yeah,

1111
00:50:36,719 --> 00:50:40,120
Speaker 10: because you when you really really want a relationship. I

1112
00:50:40,160 --> 00:50:43,000
Speaker 10: feel like I knew what we wanted and we saw

1113
00:50:43,000 --> 00:50:47,880
Speaker 10: an opportunity. You're deciding every time you bring some bullshit

1114
00:50:47,960 --> 00:50:49,960
Speaker 10: into it, even if it's subconscious.

1115
00:50:50,280 --> 00:50:53,000
Speaker 6: And if we could create a safe place to be

1116
00:50:53,120 --> 00:50:54,000
Speaker 6: a brand new person.

1117
00:50:54,280 --> 00:50:56,839
Speaker 10: Back in the day, you could just skip town over

1118
00:50:56,880 --> 00:50:57,560
Speaker 10: and change your name.

1119
00:50:57,640 --> 00:50:58,600
Speaker 6: You're a brand new person.

1120
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:15,720
Speaker 8: Change your birthday Charlie Brown, Arlie, Charlie Goodlie.

1121
00:51:15,960 --> 00:51:19,040
Speaker 7: Over two years ago.

1122
00:51:19,360 --> 00:51:22,359
Speaker 10: Like oh, ship get over to South Carolina'll be a

1123
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:25,640
Speaker 10: new nigga. We can decide to be like new people

1124
00:51:25,680 --> 00:51:30,800
Speaker 10: and new experiences with like manifesting the experiences of love we've.

1125
00:51:30,680 --> 00:51:31,480
Speaker 6: Seen in our head.

1126
00:51:31,600 --> 00:51:34,800
Speaker 10: We can really take opportunities to do that, but I

1127
00:51:34,840 --> 00:51:36,279
Speaker 10: don't know if a lot of people give themselves the

1128
00:51:36,280 --> 00:51:37,000
Speaker 10: space to do that.

1129
00:51:37,640 --> 00:51:41,880
Speaker 3: Also, like just the paradigm shift is like when you,

1130
00:51:42,080 --> 00:51:45,560
Speaker 3: like I said, I could like subconsciously committing that no

1131
00:51:45,600 --> 00:51:47,680
Speaker 3: one was coming with any type of thing I was

1132
00:51:47,680 --> 00:51:49,920
Speaker 3: going to be impressed with. So then I was like,

1133
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:53,840
Speaker 3: I'm protecting myself by expecting very little from men in general.

1134
00:51:54,239 --> 00:51:56,560
Speaker 3: I knew I had no expectation because I didn't have

1135
00:51:56,600 --> 00:51:58,520
Speaker 3: a lot of faith in it, you know what I mean.

1136
00:51:58,560 --> 00:51:59,120
Speaker 9: But I think a.

1137
00:51:59,040 --> 00:52:01,920
Speaker 3: Lot of like even Eric and I have done a

1138
00:52:01,920 --> 00:52:06,800
Speaker 3: lot of work also not really realizing it on authenticity

1139
00:52:07,440 --> 00:52:10,960
Speaker 3: showing up as ourselves, and I think we underestimate how

1140
00:52:11,000 --> 00:52:15,480
Speaker 3: that's step one. If you are still struggling with how

1141
00:52:15,719 --> 00:52:18,960
Speaker 3: like showing up as yourself, then how can you pursue

1142
00:52:19,000 --> 00:52:20,080
Speaker 3: a romantic partner?

1143
00:52:20,520 --> 00:52:21,040
Speaker 1: You know what I mean?

1144
00:52:21,080 --> 00:52:22,640
Speaker 3: And even though we put a lot of our shit

1145
00:52:22,680 --> 00:52:26,680
Speaker 3: on the table, it also gave space, like privately, we

1146
00:52:26,719 --> 00:52:30,120
Speaker 3: can't lie either. There's no way I can fight up

1147
00:52:30,160 --> 00:52:32,560
Speaker 3: with a boyfriend and be like, oh no, I slept

1148
00:52:32,560 --> 00:52:34,799
Speaker 3: with three people, you know. I was like, bitch, I

1149
00:52:34,880 --> 00:52:37,160
Speaker 3: just listened to two episodes and I heard about three people.

1150
00:52:37,719 --> 00:52:41,320
Speaker 3: So it's like we gave ourselves this gift of showing

1151
00:52:41,400 --> 00:52:45,080
Speaker 3: up as ourselves so that we manifested and attracted partners

1152
00:52:45,080 --> 00:52:47,719
Speaker 3: that were going to be accepting and loving of that

1153
00:52:47,800 --> 00:52:50,839
Speaker 3: and like also understanding because we've been fruitful in our

1154
00:52:50,960 --> 00:52:55,240
Speaker 3: entity like that, whoever comes and has to honor that.

1155
00:52:55,239 --> 00:52:56,239
Speaker 9: And protect that.

1156
00:52:56,640 --> 00:52:59,680
Speaker 3: And I think we've both been in relationships where people's

1157
00:52:59,719 --> 00:53:04,040
Speaker 3: like men try to like make comments about the way

1158
00:53:04,080 --> 00:53:07,000
Speaker 3: we show up and it is it's very public facing,

1159
00:53:07,080 --> 00:53:09,759
Speaker 3: but how how it felt like such a.

1160
00:53:11,080 --> 00:53:12,600
Speaker 9: Disrespect because.

1161
00:53:13,840 --> 00:53:16,160
Speaker 3: What it means to us and how like it's our

1162
00:53:16,200 --> 00:53:18,000
Speaker 3: purpose in ways, and you could look at it at

1163
00:53:18,000 --> 00:53:20,800
Speaker 3: the very entertaining base level, but in the larger sense,

1164
00:53:21,320 --> 00:53:23,200
Speaker 3: our work is so deeply important for us because we

1165
00:53:23,200 --> 00:53:25,520
Speaker 3: feel like it's life changing. But if someone a partner

1166
00:53:25,520 --> 00:53:28,160
Speaker 3: comes and tries to like dim that, then it's very

1167
00:53:28,200 --> 00:53:29,799
Speaker 3: much like fuck, now it's not going.

1168
00:53:29,719 --> 00:53:30,880
Speaker 1: To live, mind can't.

1169
00:53:31,160 --> 00:53:33,919
Speaker 3: Yeah, so's it's brought us to this point to find

1170
00:53:33,920 --> 00:53:35,520
Speaker 3: people who can hold all of that.

1171
00:53:36,680 --> 00:53:37,560
Speaker 9: So thank you both.

1172
00:53:37,600 --> 00:53:40,080
Speaker 5: Okay, yes, are you welcome, and thank you for holding

1173
00:53:40,080 --> 00:53:42,799
Speaker 5: me too, because I am a lot and.

1174
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:47,560
Speaker 3: You know, and that's another level of that's another level

1175
00:53:47,560 --> 00:53:50,719
Speaker 3: of like acceptance, I think, is which a stage in

1176
00:53:50,760 --> 00:53:53,680
Speaker 3: a relationship that has not spoken about a lot, which

1177
00:53:53,719 --> 00:53:57,359
Speaker 3: is the part where you're like, wow, it's it's I

1178
00:53:57,600 --> 00:53:59,960
Speaker 3: you are a human being and there is a lot

1179
00:54:00,040 --> 00:54:03,080
Speaker 3: level of respect and compassion and love that I have

1180
00:54:03,160 --> 00:54:04,360
Speaker 3: to recognize that, like, you're.

1181
00:54:04,239 --> 00:54:07,160
Speaker 1: Gonna human human, you're human.

1182
00:54:07,200 --> 00:54:08,960
Speaker 3: You're gonna be loud, you're gonna be boycious, maybe you'll

1183
00:54:09,000 --> 00:54:10,919
Speaker 3: be quiet, whatever it is. It's if I if it's

1184
00:54:10,920 --> 00:54:14,000
Speaker 3: not abriab when I want you to be in the moment, Yeah,

1185
00:54:14,000 --> 00:54:16,560
Speaker 3: it's not up to me perfectly curating yeah, it's not

1186
00:54:16,600 --> 00:54:20,120
Speaker 3: a perfectly curated, you know person, and like, neither are you.

1187
00:54:20,320 --> 00:54:22,400
Speaker 3: And I see there's so much of myself that I

1188
00:54:22,400 --> 00:54:24,400
Speaker 3: see in Orlando that is I have to shut the

1189
00:54:24,400 --> 00:54:27,400
Speaker 3: fuck up because I'm like, bitch, you be naked, bitch,

1190
00:54:27,480 --> 00:54:29,399
Speaker 3: you be this, you know, And it's like, if you're

1191
00:54:29,400 --> 00:54:31,400
Speaker 3: going to accept me in my wholeness, I have no

1192
00:54:31,680 --> 00:54:33,360
Speaker 3: choice but to accept you in your wholeness. But I

1193
00:54:33,360 --> 00:54:35,960
Speaker 3: have so rarely met a man who would accept me

1194
00:54:36,000 --> 00:54:38,359
Speaker 3: even in my two thirds noess.

1195
00:54:40,000 --> 00:54:41,799
Speaker 9: That I didn't even have to, you know what I mean.

1196
00:54:41,880 --> 00:54:45,080
Speaker 3: But in this I'm like, damn, he is pretty flexible,

1197
00:54:46,320 --> 00:54:48,759
Speaker 3: who also is gonna take me? He loves me, So

1198
00:54:49,160 --> 00:54:51,799
Speaker 3: there is a level of yeah, like a mirroring that

1199
00:54:51,880 --> 00:54:54,239
Speaker 3: has to happen. And like even if Erica and I

1200
00:54:54,360 --> 00:54:57,960
Speaker 3: like starting our our brand and a lot of our

1201
00:54:58,200 --> 00:55:01,600
Speaker 3: like our revival in life, this like rite of passage,

1202
00:55:01,600 --> 00:55:04,120
Speaker 3: which is good moms, I think is like us being like.

1203
00:55:04,680 --> 00:55:07,520
Speaker 9: We're going we don't need boyfriends. We're single moms.

1204
00:55:07,560 --> 00:55:10,040
Speaker 3: We're unsensitive, we're single me do what we want, you know,

1205
00:55:10,200 --> 00:55:12,399
Speaker 3: Like there's always been a kind of like a fuck

1206
00:55:12,440 --> 00:55:17,720
Speaker 3: you to the patriarchy that we've we've firmly, we've firmly

1207
00:55:17,800 --> 00:55:20,960
Speaker 3: like built a foundation, which was important, but that we're

1208
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:24,319
Speaker 3: shifting and that it requires a softness and it requires

1209
00:55:24,360 --> 00:55:28,319
Speaker 3: a you know, just like making space for the masculine.

1210
00:55:28,320 --> 00:55:30,239
Speaker 3: We have created a lot of things together, and so

1211
00:55:30,680 --> 00:55:34,680
Speaker 3: you know, Orlando, I migrate like integrated into our worlds,

1212
00:55:34,719 --> 00:55:37,960
Speaker 3: like professionally and personally, which was a shift for us

1213
00:55:37,960 --> 00:55:39,760
Speaker 3: because we've been so hardcore.

1214
00:55:39,400 --> 00:55:40,160
Speaker 9: Like we're single moms.

1215
00:55:40,160 --> 00:55:42,040
Speaker 3: We could do everything, but I take our kids skiing,

1216
00:55:42,080 --> 00:55:45,000
Speaker 3: no men, We could do grocery shopping, we could do everything.

1217
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:44,960
Speaker 9: You know.

1218
00:55:45,120 --> 00:55:47,759
Speaker 3: And so even when I was in love and he's like, bitch,

1219
00:55:47,800 --> 00:55:50,200
Speaker 3: act like you're in love, it's because I was in

1220
00:55:50,239 --> 00:55:55,239
Speaker 3: love but in ways really trying to like minimize it

1221
00:55:55,400 --> 00:55:57,600
Speaker 3: because I didn't even know how to show up happy

1222
00:55:57,640 --> 00:56:00,440
Speaker 3: and in love because I had lived so much like

1223
00:56:00,640 --> 00:56:03,319
Speaker 3: I'm alone and I am fine and I'm good. I

1224
00:56:03,320 --> 00:56:05,840
Speaker 3: don't anything, you know, and so like the having to

1225
00:56:06,920 --> 00:56:09,640
Speaker 3: for like months to be like, what the fucker do

1226
00:56:09,680 --> 00:56:12,600
Speaker 3: you have an attitude about like you are happy, smile.

1227
00:56:15,480 --> 00:56:18,720
Speaker 3: It's crazy, but it's like if you don't see yourself

1228
00:56:18,719 --> 00:56:21,640
Speaker 3: in the happily ever after, really truly, if you haven't

1229
00:56:21,719 --> 00:56:23,640
Speaker 3: visualized it. Just like if you haven't seen a love

1230
00:56:23,680 --> 00:56:26,839
Speaker 3: that is something you'd like to replicate, how can we

1231
00:56:27,600 --> 00:56:30,400
Speaker 3: receive it? And it requires that I go inside myself

1232
00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:33,680
Speaker 3: and be like, bitch, you're tripping it. Look how hard

1233
00:56:33,680 --> 00:56:35,680
Speaker 3: it is for you to be happy, and like really

1234
00:56:35,719 --> 00:56:37,120
Speaker 3: sit in that and like what does that mean?

1235
00:56:37,160 --> 00:56:37,839
Speaker 9: Does that not mean?

1236
00:56:38,120 --> 00:56:39,920
Speaker 3: That means like I don't really feel like I deserve it?

1237
00:56:39,960 --> 00:56:42,040
Speaker 3: And that's truly what that means. If you can't really

1238
00:56:42,080 --> 00:56:44,239
Speaker 3: accept all that is good in your life, it's like

1239
00:56:44,280 --> 00:56:46,480
Speaker 3: you're not respecting the work that you've done. You're not

1240
00:56:46,520 --> 00:56:48,680
Speaker 3: respecting the healing that you've done, and so you're not

1241
00:56:48,680 --> 00:56:50,879
Speaker 3: going to respect the partner that the universe and God

1242
00:56:50,920 --> 00:56:53,160
Speaker 3: brings you. And so it's like you have to be able.

1243
00:56:52,960 --> 00:56:57,720
Speaker 9: To constantly grow and shed and grow and shed individually

1244
00:56:57,960 --> 00:57:00,880
Speaker 9: and in order to like understand that about another person

1245
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:03,840
Speaker 9: into like hold it in one bed and one household.

1246
00:57:04,760 --> 00:57:12,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know anything about one household, but I

1247
00:57:12,440 --> 00:57:14,319
Speaker 2: will say though, I mean, obviously me and she can

1248
00:57:14,440 --> 00:57:17,080
Speaker 2: spend a lot of time together, but we also take

1249
00:57:17,120 --> 00:57:20,000
Speaker 2: space from one another. And I know, like that's you know,

1250
00:57:20,520 --> 00:57:22,480
Speaker 2: harder to do when you are in one household. But

1251
00:57:22,520 --> 00:57:24,480
Speaker 2: I do think it is important. I think it's important

1252
00:57:24,520 --> 00:57:27,520
Speaker 2: for couples, even the health like the healthiest of ones,

1253
00:57:27,640 --> 00:57:35,880
Speaker 2: like to find comfortability in the missing, even because I

1254
00:57:36,480 --> 00:57:38,920
Speaker 2: long for him sometimes and in a good.

1255
00:57:38,680 --> 00:57:39,760
Speaker 1: And healthy way.

1256
00:57:40,000 --> 00:57:41,920
Speaker 2: And then like there are times where like he's like,

1257
00:57:41,920 --> 00:57:43,320
Speaker 2: I can't come over, Like today he told me he

1258
00:57:43,360 --> 00:57:46,120
Speaker 2: can't come over tonight, and I found myself go and

1259
00:57:46,120 --> 00:57:48,400
Speaker 2: then I was like, oh, but yeah, what am I

1260
00:57:48,440 --> 00:57:51,120
Speaker 2: gonna do tonight? What you gonna do with yourself tonight, bitch?

1261
00:57:51,520 --> 00:57:57,040
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you're gonna, Yeah, you're gonna And I just

1262
00:57:57,080 --> 00:58:00,920
Speaker 2: feel like, I think the space, but also I think

1263
00:58:01,520 --> 00:58:03,600
Speaker 2: when you are together, making the time, And I think

1264
00:58:03,640 --> 00:58:05,560
Speaker 2: you and Orlando have done a really beautiful job of

1265
00:58:05,560 --> 00:58:10,760
Speaker 2: this throughout your relationship is finding the play and finding

1266
00:58:11,160 --> 00:58:13,680
Speaker 2: just the one on one alone time with each other.

1267
00:58:13,720 --> 00:58:15,760
Speaker 2: And I think a lot of times couples, if you're

1268
00:58:16,000 --> 00:58:19,240
Speaker 2: farther into your relationship you have kids, it feels harder

1269
00:58:19,280 --> 00:58:22,040
Speaker 2: and harder and more impossible, and literally you can make

1270
00:58:22,120 --> 00:58:25,560
Speaker 2: up every excuse and they feel valid as to why

1271
00:58:26,240 --> 00:58:28,800
Speaker 2: it's not a possibility at this point, you know, And

1272
00:58:28,840 --> 00:58:31,800
Speaker 2: so then you go on trips, but then you bring

1273
00:58:31,840 --> 00:58:35,280
Speaker 2: your kids because you feel bad, or you know, like

1274
00:58:35,320 --> 00:58:37,240
Speaker 2: you go on a date night but like you're talking

1275
00:58:37,240 --> 00:58:41,560
Speaker 2: about Johnny's homework that he failed, or you know, like

1276
00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:44,720
Speaker 2: you're still involving, you know, you're not really taking the

1277
00:58:44,760 --> 00:58:48,520
Speaker 2: time to really come back to one another. And I

1278
00:58:48,560 --> 00:58:51,640
Speaker 2: mean that's why this retreat too, is such an opportunity

1279
00:58:51,680 --> 00:58:55,240
Speaker 2: for couples who haven't made the space, don't even know

1280
00:58:55,280 --> 00:58:59,240
Speaker 2: where to start to come and like, first of all,

1281
00:58:59,280 --> 00:59:05,120
Speaker 2: just get away, unplugged, decompress, commit to saying Okay, we're

1282
00:59:05,120 --> 00:59:07,560
Speaker 2: going to do this for us, and that is it.

1283
00:59:07,800 --> 00:59:09,800
Speaker 2: We don't know what else we're doing this for, but

1284
00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:11,880
Speaker 2: we're doing this for us, and then coming and just

1285
00:59:12,280 --> 00:59:15,040
Speaker 2: being taken care of. I mean, me and Miela have

1286
00:59:15,080 --> 00:59:19,080
Speaker 2: done fourteen retreats, fourteen retreats at this point, and you know,

1287
00:59:21,240 --> 00:59:25,120
Speaker 2: as women obviously holding space for women like I see

1288
00:59:25,200 --> 00:59:30,440
Speaker 2: how powerful it is for people to step away from

1289
00:59:30,920 --> 00:59:36,000
Speaker 2: their regular scheduled programming and put their trust into this

1290
00:59:36,200 --> 00:59:39,160
Speaker 2: experience that they've said yes to. So as a couple

1291
00:59:39,280 --> 00:59:41,800
Speaker 2: saying yes to an experience together, I feel like there's

1292
00:59:41,880 --> 00:59:43,920
Speaker 2: even more power in that together because you guys are

1293
00:59:43,920 --> 00:59:46,360
Speaker 2: already SYNCD up, whether or not you're struggling your relationship,

1294
00:59:46,360 --> 00:59:48,560
Speaker 2: whatever it might be. You guys have chosen one another,

1295
00:59:48,760 --> 00:59:50,920
Speaker 2: so you already have the spark. The spark is there

1296
00:59:50,960 --> 00:59:54,080
Speaker 2: even when you think it's died, Like it's there. But

1297
00:59:54,160 --> 00:59:57,720
Speaker 2: sometimes it really does take you deciding to say, Okay,

1298
00:59:57,760 --> 00:59:59,240
Speaker 2: we're going to do this for us, We're going to

1299
00:59:59,280 --> 01:00:03,040
Speaker 2: step into this new space, had this new experience, and

1300
01:00:03,800 --> 01:00:10,320
Speaker 2: just say yes collectively, because sometimes I feel like like

1301
01:00:10,360 --> 01:00:12,640
Speaker 2: maybe you're you're saying yes, he's saying no, like this

1302
01:00:13,040 --> 01:00:15,520
Speaker 2: back and forth, whether it's like the kids and like

1303
01:00:15,560 --> 01:00:18,000
Speaker 2: not agreeing on how to raise your kids, not agreeing

1304
01:00:18,040 --> 01:00:20,120
Speaker 2: what to have for dinner, not agreeing what to watch

1305
01:00:20,160 --> 01:00:24,800
Speaker 2: on TV, Like you need a collective yes in your relationship.

1306
01:00:24,360 --> 01:00:26,880
Speaker 9: And something that's new for both of you, and like

1307
01:00:27,440 --> 01:00:28,160
Speaker 9: fuck it. You know.

1308
01:00:29,160 --> 01:00:31,760
Speaker 5: One thing I really tried to like make it a

1309
01:00:32,400 --> 01:00:35,360
Speaker 5: very important that relationship is like the individuality. It's like

1310
01:00:35,480 --> 01:00:39,240
Speaker 5: I'm my person, you're your person. When we're together, we're

1311
01:00:39,640 --> 01:00:42,640
Speaker 5: our that's that's us together. That's a whole different thing.

1312
01:00:42,880 --> 01:00:45,200
Speaker 5: When Luna's around, that's a whole different thing. And so

1313
01:00:45,320 --> 01:00:48,280
Speaker 5: like that's why when we're hanging out together, it's just

1314
01:00:48,480 --> 01:00:50,880
Speaker 5: me and you we're not parents, We're just two.

1315
01:00:50,720 --> 01:00:52,320
Speaker 7: People that are in a relationship.

1316
01:00:52,320 --> 01:00:54,480
Speaker 5: And then we can like, I guess we're sort of

1317
01:00:54,560 --> 01:00:58,200
Speaker 5: kind of role playing is not parents, and so like

1318
01:00:58,240 --> 01:01:00,840
Speaker 5: we could really enjoy our time together and just focus

1319
01:01:00,880 --> 01:01:03,720
Speaker 5: on each other without worrying about anything else. That's like

1320
01:01:03,800 --> 01:01:05,880
Speaker 5: within the world and role playing is really are things,

1321
01:01:05,880 --> 01:01:08,240
Speaker 5: So like when we could really get into the like

1322
01:01:08,320 --> 01:01:11,240
Speaker 5: this feel of like, hey, when I'm by myself, I

1323
01:01:11,280 --> 01:01:13,680
Speaker 5: can really enjoy this time by myself and I can

1324
01:01:13,720 --> 01:01:15,840
Speaker 5: like miss you, and when you're by yourself, I don't

1325
01:01:15,840 --> 01:01:18,520
Speaker 5: want you thinking and worry about what I'm doing, which

1326
01:01:18,520 --> 01:01:20,120
Speaker 5: is also why I'd like to have like a lot

1327
01:01:20,120 --> 01:01:21,880
Speaker 5: of trust in our relationship, because I don't want you

1328
01:01:22,000 --> 01:01:24,840
Speaker 5: worrying about the relationship when you're when we're not even

1329
01:01:24,840 --> 01:01:27,320
Speaker 5: in a relationship space. And then when we're together in

1330
01:01:27,360 --> 01:01:30,680
Speaker 5: a relationship, then we're all about this relationship. We're diving

1331
01:01:30,680 --> 01:01:33,600
Speaker 5: into it one hundred percent and just enjoying the time

1332
01:01:33,720 --> 01:01:35,800
Speaker 5: we have without worrying about anything else in the world.

1333
01:01:37,680 --> 01:01:42,640
Speaker 6: Amen not try That's beautiful.

1334
01:01:43,200 --> 01:01:44,600
Speaker 10: Well, I want to ask what are some of the

1335
01:01:44,600 --> 01:01:47,880
Speaker 10: practices that you guys are looking forward to doing, Like,

1336
01:01:47,920 --> 01:01:50,400
Speaker 10: what are some practices that y'all do that, you know

1337
01:01:50,520 --> 01:01:53,240
Speaker 10: for sure we're going to do out there.

1338
01:01:54,600 --> 01:01:56,240
Speaker 3: I think me and Orlando do like a lot of

1339
01:01:56,240 --> 01:01:59,120
Speaker 3: playing in general, and even I mean Erica and our retreats,

1340
01:01:59,160 --> 01:02:01,640
Speaker 3: we have a lot of focus on play, you know,

1341
01:02:01,760 --> 01:02:04,280
Speaker 3: like just really like resetting your nervous system.

1342
01:02:04,640 --> 01:02:07,240
Speaker 7: How much relationship is fun as fu Yeah, just like

1343
01:02:07,560 --> 01:02:07,919
Speaker 7: you can.

1344
01:02:07,880 --> 01:02:09,000
Speaker 9: Bringing the friendship back.

1345
01:02:10,200 --> 01:02:11,520
Speaker 3: So I know, we have like a lot of sexy

1346
01:02:11,520 --> 01:02:14,840
Speaker 3: ship plan like Glowing the Dark paint, night body paint.

1347
01:02:15,960 --> 01:02:19,760
Speaker 3: I know, we have some hand trick dinners where you

1348
01:02:19,760 --> 01:02:24,120
Speaker 3: can get blindfolded and future partner and just also like sorry,

1349
01:02:24,720 --> 01:02:30,640
Speaker 3: hey hey, and also like sexy assignments, you know, sending

1350
01:02:30,680 --> 01:02:34,160
Speaker 3: you home, sending you to your room with some work, homework,

1351
01:02:34,200 --> 01:02:34,919
Speaker 3: and you know.

1352
01:02:35,600 --> 01:02:35,920
Speaker 7: And.

1353
01:02:37,720 --> 01:02:39,480
Speaker 9: Oh, I just thought room work.

1354
01:02:39,560 --> 01:02:41,600
Speaker 3: I just thought about something that might be sexy too,

1355
01:02:42,360 --> 01:02:46,760
Speaker 3: like every night leaving different challenges on each in each

1356
01:02:46,840 --> 01:02:50,960
Speaker 3: person's room, or like just specific for them like whatever

1357
01:02:51,000 --> 01:02:54,560
Speaker 3: Skinny did at twelve am, you know, you know, or

1358
01:02:54,600 --> 01:02:55,439
Speaker 3: something like that.

1359
01:02:56,160 --> 01:02:58,160
Speaker 9: Yeah, challenges.

1360
01:02:58,200 --> 01:03:01,920
Speaker 3: But I'm really excited to just go onto this space

1361
01:03:01,960 --> 01:03:04,440
Speaker 3: and be able to share in the things that have

1362
01:03:04,520 --> 01:03:07,320
Speaker 3: worked in like deepening our relationship and even like the

1363
01:03:07,360 --> 01:03:10,440
Speaker 3: fact that going to Tantra school in the beginning of

1364
01:03:10,480 --> 01:03:12,920
Speaker 3: our relationship, like literally that first trip we went on

1365
01:03:12,960 --> 01:03:15,240
Speaker 3: in Mexico for a month. We went on a trip

1366
01:03:15,280 --> 01:03:17,720
Speaker 3: for a month together in Mexico, like no kids, no friends,

1367
01:03:17,800 --> 01:03:19,760
Speaker 3: and it was like challenging in ways, but it was

1368
01:03:19,800 --> 01:03:22,000
Speaker 3: like at the end we felt like even when we

1369
01:03:22,000 --> 01:03:22,840
Speaker 3: got there, like, oh.

1370
01:03:22,720 --> 01:03:24,600
Speaker 9: My god, we did it. We got to be here

1371
01:03:24,640 --> 01:03:26,160
Speaker 9: for a month. We're such big kids.

1372
01:03:26,160 --> 01:03:29,120
Speaker 3: We planned it, you know, and like you know, getting

1373
01:03:29,120 --> 01:03:31,960
Speaker 3: pulled over together and like just how we navigate through

1374
01:03:31,960 --> 01:03:32,600
Speaker 3: certain things.

1375
01:03:33,040 --> 01:03:37,040
Speaker 9: But fuck, were we talking about? What are the things

1376
01:03:37,040 --> 01:03:43,800
Speaker 9: that oh but just I still forgot challenges.

1377
01:03:45,280 --> 01:03:46,520
Speaker 7: Yeah, I think we're going to.

1378
01:03:48,360 --> 01:03:50,880
Speaker 2: I have a question for you as men, because I

1379
01:03:50,920 --> 01:03:53,800
Speaker 2: think I think women we always have these big ideas

1380
01:03:53,800 --> 01:03:58,760
Speaker 2: for like spicing up our relationship and bringing new ideas

1381
01:03:58,840 --> 01:04:02,120
Speaker 2: to the bedroom or just even the bedroom, yes, and

1382
01:04:02,160 --> 01:04:07,480
Speaker 2: also just in general like wanting to request things but

1383
01:04:08,360 --> 01:04:12,160
Speaker 2: maybe not always knowing how. What is the best way

1384
01:04:12,360 --> 01:04:16,120
Speaker 2: for a woman to approach their partner when they are

1385
01:04:16,680 --> 01:04:18,080
Speaker 2: in need of I.

1386
01:04:18,040 --> 01:04:18,560
Speaker 1: Guess like.

1387
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:25,080
Speaker 2: Newness, trying something new that maybe is like different than

1388
01:04:25,080 --> 01:04:27,360
Speaker 2: anything they've done together. Because I think a lot of

1389
01:04:27,360 --> 01:04:30,520
Speaker 2: women have been shut down by men, maybe perhaps.

1390
01:04:30,240 --> 01:04:31,000
Speaker 1: By their approach.

1391
01:04:32,840 --> 01:04:36,040
Speaker 2: Maybe they've already maybe they've had like discussions, or there's

1392
01:04:36,080 --> 01:04:39,600
Speaker 2: just something there's like there's just a roadblock in their

1393
01:04:40,080 --> 01:04:43,680
Speaker 2: form of communication. Like how would you say a woman

1394
01:04:43,920 --> 01:04:47,000
Speaker 2: should approach her man in this realm? Because I think

1395
01:04:47,200 --> 01:04:49,360
Speaker 2: even when you think about a couple's retreat, I think

1396
01:04:50,480 --> 01:04:54,080
Speaker 2: men like a man you sent here, you guys are

1397
01:04:54,080 --> 01:04:56,200
Speaker 2: different type of men. But I would say, like when

1398
01:04:56,240 --> 01:04:58,520
Speaker 2: a man hears about a couple's retreat, is he worried?

1399
01:04:58,600 --> 01:05:00,880
Speaker 1: Like, oh my god, what was? Well, we're about to

1400
01:05:00,920 --> 01:05:01,439
Speaker 1: go do over.

1401
01:05:01,640 --> 01:05:08,240
Speaker 5: That's what we're here, Charlie Brown will be fucking around.

1402
01:05:13,160 --> 01:05:16,160
Speaker 7: You don't know, Charlie that niggas really clocked around.

1403
01:05:16,560 --> 01:05:18,760
Speaker 1: But like yeah, like what is what? How do women

1404
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:19,720
Speaker 1: miss the mark with this?

1405
01:05:19,800 --> 01:05:22,360
Speaker 10: Do you mean specifically intimately or just new things in

1406
01:05:22,400 --> 01:05:23,040
Speaker 10: the relationship?

1407
01:05:23,160 --> 01:05:26,240
Speaker 2: Maybe intimately, because that's probably like the biggest thing that women,

1408
01:05:26,920 --> 01:05:28,960
Speaker 2: you know, feel scared to bring up.

1409
01:05:29,280 --> 01:05:32,160
Speaker 7: I think that men.

1410
01:05:34,920 --> 01:05:38,120
Speaker 5: We're like leaders, but we need to see, like we

1411
01:05:38,200 --> 01:05:40,840
Speaker 5: follow other leaders, so we need to see something by

1412
01:05:40,880 --> 01:05:44,479
Speaker 5: example and like kind of also got to like wear

1413
01:05:44,560 --> 01:05:47,400
Speaker 5: us down, like make it be make the introduction to

1414
01:05:47,480 --> 01:05:51,440
Speaker 5: it like sexy, like we like things to be. We

1415
01:05:51,480 --> 01:05:54,040
Speaker 5: don't mind being manipulated in the way of like, hey,

1416
01:05:54,120 --> 01:05:55,760
Speaker 5: I kind of want to do this. I'm gonna rub

1417
01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:57,880
Speaker 5: your feet and then I'm gonna put on this new

1418
01:05:57,920 --> 01:05:59,400
Speaker 5: thing that I want. I'm gonna put you in the

1419
01:05:59,400 --> 01:06:01,320
Speaker 5: space of the new thing and then see if you

1420
01:06:01,480 --> 01:06:03,400
Speaker 5: like it and then make it be a little bit

1421
01:06:03,440 --> 01:06:05,600
Speaker 5: more sexy. But we kind of need an example, not

1422
01:06:05,720 --> 01:06:06,800
Speaker 5: just like straight.

1423
01:06:06,560 --> 01:06:08,800
Speaker 2: Up ass or like can I talk to you?

1424
01:06:08,800 --> 01:06:12,360
Speaker 7: No? No, do not do last night ever? Say? Can

1425
01:06:12,440 --> 01:06:15,120
Speaker 7: I don't say talk togger.

1426
01:06:15,480 --> 01:06:17,920
Speaker 10: Yes, It's not that it's a trigger, it's just like

1427
01:06:18,040 --> 01:06:19,120
Speaker 10: what are we talking about?

1428
01:06:19,120 --> 01:06:22,880
Speaker 6: And is it the right time this? Then seriously I.

1429
01:06:23,280 --> 01:06:25,800
Speaker 2: Realized I'm not that good at those moments. I realized

1430
01:06:25,840 --> 01:06:28,480
Speaker 2: that one time I woke cam like had just woke.

1431
01:06:28,400 --> 01:06:29,520
Speaker 1: Up, and I was like, hey, can we talk?

1432
01:06:29,600 --> 01:06:31,240
Speaker 2: And I was like and then as I said, as

1433
01:06:31,280 --> 01:06:33,160
Speaker 2: the words came out of my mouth, A can read,

1434
01:06:34,120 --> 01:06:41,440
Speaker 2: I was like, this was not a good Like he

1435
01:06:41,560 --> 01:06:45,360
Speaker 2: was like like, not before you open your eyes.

1436
01:06:46,240 --> 01:06:46,760
Speaker 7: I waited for.

1437
01:06:46,800 --> 01:06:48,720
Speaker 6: Him to make any of that black woman sitting on

1438
01:06:48,720 --> 01:06:49,400
Speaker 6: the side of the base.

1439
01:06:53,720 --> 01:06:55,560
Speaker 2: Let him take a sip with the drink of water

1440
01:06:55,640 --> 01:06:57,040
Speaker 2: on the edge of the table first.

1441
01:06:57,440 --> 01:07:01,200
Speaker 5: But yeah, put on some laundry before you launch the laundry,

1442
01:07:01,360 --> 01:07:04,800
Speaker 5: put on some laingry. Make it sexy before you enter

1443
01:07:04,920 --> 01:07:07,560
Speaker 5: anything new into into the relationship, because we need to

1444
01:07:07,600 --> 01:07:09,959
Speaker 5: be warned down, we need to be warmed up and yeah,

1445
01:07:10,000 --> 01:07:13,160
Speaker 5: we need to be manipulated in this very sexy way

1446
01:07:13,160 --> 01:07:15,800
Speaker 5: a little bit before you enter with whatever that you

1447
01:07:16,080 --> 01:07:19,400
Speaker 5: have coming. And like most more times than none, it's

1448
01:07:19,440 --> 01:07:23,360
Speaker 5: the it's a thought. It's talking about it and us

1449
01:07:23,360 --> 01:07:25,439
Speaker 5: making it up in our own mind instead of showing

1450
01:07:25,480 --> 01:07:28,920
Speaker 5: an example of what it looks like and then us

1451
01:07:28,920 --> 01:07:30,960
Speaker 5: getting into it. That's a much better way of going

1452
01:07:30,960 --> 01:07:32,840
Speaker 5: about it because we kind of need some type of

1453
01:07:32,880 --> 01:07:35,720
Speaker 5: like leadership or some type of show in the physical

1454
01:07:36,000 --> 01:07:41,000
Speaker 5: Like women I believe operate much better within their minds

1455
01:07:41,000 --> 01:07:43,479
Speaker 5: and their mentality and the energy. Men operate much better

1456
01:07:43,560 --> 01:07:46,000
Speaker 5: from in the physical and what we see. So if

1457
01:07:46,120 --> 01:07:48,680
Speaker 5: you're telling us that you need to talk, but you

1458
01:07:48,720 --> 01:07:51,120
Speaker 5: look sexy as fucking it's like, all right, we are we.

1459
01:07:51,040 --> 01:07:53,080
Speaker 7: Talking about now? Like I'm open to it.

1460
01:07:53,720 --> 01:07:59,160
Speaker 10: Yeah, okays, yes, and everything you said. I think that

1461
01:07:59,280 --> 01:08:02,320
Speaker 10: there should be scheduled times where people talk.

1462
01:08:02,480 --> 01:08:06,160
Speaker 6: First of all, and I think that really helps. I

1463
01:08:06,160 --> 01:08:06,560
Speaker 6: don't think.

1464
01:08:07,040 --> 01:08:09,919
Speaker 10: Yeah, I think that's like a timing thing because you're

1465
01:08:10,000 --> 01:08:13,040
Speaker 10: now on one accord as to what we're coming together for,

1466
01:08:13,520 --> 01:08:16,200
Speaker 10: Whereas at any other time of the day, whether a

1467
01:08:16,240 --> 01:08:18,040
Speaker 10: man is just getting in from work, or whether he's

1468
01:08:18,080 --> 01:08:19,800
Speaker 10: about to leave to work, or whether he has to

1469
01:08:19,840 --> 01:08:21,800
Speaker 10: use the bathroom, you don't know. It could just be

1470
01:08:22,439 --> 01:08:25,360
Speaker 10: that could be a turnoff right there, because if you

1471
01:08:25,360 --> 01:08:28,160
Speaker 10: don't have the right answers, men want to have answers.

1472
01:08:28,240 --> 01:08:30,280
Speaker 6: Yeah, okay, So.

1473
01:08:29,880 --> 01:08:32,040
Speaker 10: I think that on a date night is a great

1474
01:08:32,080 --> 01:08:35,040
Speaker 10: time to introduce any new ideas, And I think a

1475
01:08:35,120 --> 01:08:39,439
Speaker 10: date night should be prioritized and scheduled anyway. So this

1476
01:08:39,520 --> 01:08:42,439
Speaker 10: is our opportunity to get on one wave first of all,

1477
01:08:42,439 --> 01:08:44,960
Speaker 10: but then have fun on our wave. Are we surfing

1478
01:08:44,960 --> 01:08:46,680
Speaker 10: this one? Are we boogie boyding this one? Are we

1479
01:08:46,960 --> 01:08:47,839
Speaker 10: going about chata?

1480
01:08:47,960 --> 01:08:48,680
Speaker 7: Are we?

1481
01:08:48,680 --> 01:08:50,040
Speaker 6: Well, we don't as not, you know.

1482
01:08:50,520 --> 01:08:53,200
Speaker 10: I think in that fun space of exploration is the

1483
01:08:53,240 --> 01:08:57,360
Speaker 10: perfect time to plant any seed about ideas, especially sexual

1484
01:08:57,439 --> 01:09:02,519
Speaker 10: because a man's subconscious mind wants to have sex at

1485
01:09:02,520 --> 01:09:02,800
Speaker 10: the end.

1486
01:09:02,760 --> 01:09:03,719
Speaker 6: Of the day anyway.

1487
01:09:04,280 --> 01:09:07,040
Speaker 10: So if it's something that you've kind of mentioned before,

1488
01:09:07,280 --> 01:09:10,599
Speaker 10: maybe throughout there. I think those times when we're like

1489
01:09:11,000 --> 01:09:14,600
Speaker 10: prioritizing each other, that's when you say, I got this idea.

1490
01:09:14,800 --> 01:09:24,759
Speaker 6: Where do people get ideas? TikTok, I got this idea.

1491
01:09:24,840 --> 01:09:25,719
Speaker 6: I thought about sharing.

1492
01:09:25,840 --> 01:09:28,360
Speaker 10: But like you said, you're gonna both be looking nice,

1493
01:09:28,360 --> 01:09:32,280
Speaker 10: You'll both be feeling good, just like I think asking

1494
01:09:32,280 --> 01:09:34,680
Speaker 10: those types of questions when the oxytocin is going is

1495
01:09:35,400 --> 01:09:40,200
Speaker 10: bead time, because it's sometimes we just don't be knowing.

1496
01:09:40,280 --> 01:09:42,439
Speaker 10: It's like wrapping our mind around what we don't know.

1497
01:09:42,600 --> 01:09:44,880
Speaker 10: Along with this new thing. Baby, I want to learn

1498
01:09:44,920 --> 01:09:46,960
Speaker 10: how to rope tie. I need you to tie me up.

1499
01:09:47,000 --> 01:09:51,639
Speaker 10: It's like I gotta work tomorrow. Yeah, we talk about

1500
01:09:51,640 --> 01:09:53,680
Speaker 10: this on Saturday, so.

1501
01:09:53,640 --> 01:09:54,960
Speaker 1: You don't want to tie me up tonight, so you

1502
01:09:55,000 --> 01:09:56,160
Speaker 1: wait till you haven't tie me up.

1503
01:09:56,200 --> 01:09:56,400
Speaker 7: Ever.

1504
01:09:56,520 --> 01:09:58,519
Speaker 3: So I was gonna say I was when I was

1505
01:09:58,560 --> 01:10:01,000
Speaker 3: going to Contra school. It was nice to learn the

1506
01:10:01,080 --> 01:10:04,519
Speaker 3: exercises and also be applying them with Orlando. So that's

1507
01:10:04,600 --> 01:10:06,559
Speaker 3: kind of weave into our relationship in a time where

1508
01:10:06,600 --> 01:10:08,200
Speaker 3: I was learning. And I think sometimes we see it

1509
01:10:08,240 --> 01:10:11,360
Speaker 3: on the internet. We see meditation and wethink like that's

1510
01:10:11,400 --> 01:10:14,160
Speaker 3: for some old folks, So that's for like that's something

1511
01:10:14,160 --> 01:10:16,760
Speaker 3: that like it sounds goofy or silly or cheesy, but

1512
01:10:17,360 --> 01:10:20,080
Speaker 3: I feel like it's definitely something that there are tools

1513
01:10:20,080 --> 01:10:24,400
Speaker 3: that we have to adopt in today's time that have

1514
01:10:24,479 --> 01:10:27,439
Speaker 3: our like age old things. So why not dive deeper

1515
01:10:27,439 --> 01:10:28,440
Speaker 3: into like learning.

1516
01:10:28,360 --> 01:10:30,360
Speaker 1: Asient practices work for a reason.

1517
01:10:30,160 --> 01:10:32,640
Speaker 3: For a reason, like a reason about like getting on

1518
01:10:32,680 --> 01:10:35,280
Speaker 3: the same frequency. Like you've said, that's like there's a

1519
01:10:35,360 --> 01:10:38,679
Speaker 3: level of like when we're arguing, like physically, I feel

1520
01:10:38,960 --> 01:10:41,400
Speaker 3: like I feel the distance, the separation. It's like you're

1521
01:10:41,439 --> 01:10:44,200
Speaker 3: literally creating distance and armor in your energy.

1522
01:10:44,560 --> 01:10:46,040
Speaker 9: And so sometimes we don't even have.

1523
01:10:46,000 --> 01:10:49,559
Speaker 2: The tools to just quietly together breathe in the same

1524
01:10:49,640 --> 01:10:51,960
Speaker 2: sequence so that when we do speak, we're clear and

1525
01:10:52,000 --> 01:10:55,639
Speaker 2: we're like aligned and we're simply like touch each other

1526
01:10:55,680 --> 01:10:58,479
Speaker 2: while you're having a serious conversation so that you know

1527
01:10:58,560 --> 01:11:01,559
Speaker 2: that there's like safetyfety hear and that like we're both

1528
01:11:01,600 --> 01:11:03,680
Speaker 2: committed to a positive outcome.

1529
01:11:03,520 --> 01:11:06,160
Speaker 3: Or observing the fact like how difficult it is when

1530
01:11:06,160 --> 01:11:08,640
Speaker 3: you actually say, what if I did just touch somebody.

1531
01:11:08,360 --> 01:11:12,360
Speaker 1: When I'm arguing them and really realizing that you're resistant.

1532
01:11:12,760 --> 01:11:16,360
Speaker 3: Like physically feeling how that feels, because it sometimes is

1533
01:11:16,400 --> 01:11:18,640
Speaker 3: so difficult, and it's like damn. If you can like

1534
01:11:18,800 --> 01:11:21,519
Speaker 3: observe those feelings in your body, then you can start

1535
01:11:21,520 --> 01:11:24,000
Speaker 3: to interact with the reasons why and then try to

1536
01:11:24,040 --> 01:11:26,920
Speaker 3: do differently and like until it feels normal, you know.

1537
01:11:27,160 --> 01:11:29,799
Speaker 3: But like if we don't even have the most basic practices,

1538
01:11:29,840 --> 01:11:31,640
Speaker 3: if we don't take time and space to be like

1539
01:11:31,680 --> 01:11:32,200
Speaker 3: what do you know?

1540
01:11:32,520 --> 01:11:34,160
Speaker 9: Let me write that down then.

1541
01:11:34,040 --> 01:11:35,880
Speaker 3: Because had I not been in school at this like

1542
01:11:35,920 --> 01:11:39,160
Speaker 3: pivotal time laying the foundation of a relationship, there'd be

1543
01:11:39,160 --> 01:11:41,920
Speaker 3: like the most slightest things that have saved us, you know,

1544
01:11:42,200 --> 01:11:45,800
Speaker 3: like just speaking kindly because.

1545
01:11:45,520 --> 01:11:46,840
Speaker 7: I was ready to be out of here.

1546
01:11:48,120 --> 01:11:50,120
Speaker 2: I think it's so interesting too, how I mean, I

1547
01:11:50,439 --> 01:11:54,280
Speaker 2: think the same because I was very much learning the

1548
01:11:54,280 --> 01:11:57,280
Speaker 2: same practice as you were during the time of early

1549
01:11:57,320 --> 01:12:00,439
Speaker 2: on in me and chi Keem's relationship, and and also

1550
01:12:00,680 --> 01:12:04,040
Speaker 2: him also being a tantric man himself and bringing those

1551
01:12:04,080 --> 01:12:07,599
Speaker 2: elements and just knowing how to hold as I'm learning,

1552
01:12:07,600 --> 01:12:09,960
Speaker 2: I'm bringing these things to him, and he's already falling

1553
01:12:10,000 --> 01:12:12,479
Speaker 2: into them with me, like he knowing exactly how to

1554
01:12:12,520 --> 01:12:15,200
Speaker 2: fall into these things with me, and like you know,

1555
01:12:15,920 --> 01:12:20,479
Speaker 2: being able to I guess share, and that has been

1556
01:12:20,600 --> 01:12:24,360
Speaker 2: extremely powerful, like yeah, like even right now, I told me.

1557
01:12:24,479 --> 01:12:25,880
Speaker 2: I was like, I need to go downstairs for a second.

1558
01:12:25,920 --> 01:12:28,040
Speaker 2: I need to go outside. I need to reset.

1559
01:12:28,920 --> 01:12:31,040
Speaker 1: I just have to. And like I went down there.

1560
01:12:31,400 --> 01:12:33,519
Speaker 2: He came with me and we just held each other

1561
01:12:33,560 --> 01:12:36,640
Speaker 2: and breathed for like two minutes straight, put our foreheads

1562
01:12:36,720 --> 01:12:42,519
Speaker 2: the fuck together, took turns breathing in and out, and

1563
01:12:43,200 --> 01:12:45,799
Speaker 2: didn't say a fucking word. I didn't say a word.

1564
01:12:46,000 --> 01:12:47,880
Speaker 2: And I came back up here and I was like, okay,

1565
01:12:48,080 --> 01:12:49,519
Speaker 2: I'm ready now.

1566
01:12:49,760 --> 01:12:52,200
Speaker 5: Actually, the Tanta thing is a very good example of

1567
01:12:52,240 --> 01:12:56,120
Speaker 5: like leading by example, because when you first told me like, hey,

1568
01:12:56,200 --> 01:12:58,040
Speaker 5: let's say yap yam and like breathing this for your

1569
01:12:58,080 --> 01:12:59,720
Speaker 5: other's mouth, and I'm like, I have to go shit

1570
01:12:59,720 --> 01:13:00,000
Speaker 5: a gym.

1571
01:13:00,080 --> 01:13:02,000
Speaker 7: I don't I'm not trying to hear this right now.

1572
01:13:02,200 --> 01:13:04,120
Speaker 9: And even then I feel your resistance.

1573
01:13:03,720 --> 01:13:06,599
Speaker 5: Right, But then after some time she will go, hey,

1574
01:13:06,640 --> 01:13:09,599
Speaker 5: come with me, let's sit together, kiss me a little bit,

1575
01:13:10,000 --> 01:13:11,720
Speaker 5: hold me, and like, hey, I would really like for

1576
01:13:11,760 --> 01:13:14,000
Speaker 5: you to meditate, but we're already in the stance and

1577
01:13:14,040 --> 01:13:16,240
Speaker 5: the environment is a ready yeah.

1578
01:13:16,280 --> 01:13:17,360
Speaker 7: So that's how you get it.

1579
01:13:17,760 --> 01:13:19,840
Speaker 5: That's how you got to manipulate the situation when it

1580
01:13:19,880 --> 01:13:22,160
Speaker 5: comes to me, you got to set up the whole

1581
01:13:22,320 --> 01:13:25,040
Speaker 5: environment for them, put them in this situation, like you

1582
01:13:25,120 --> 01:13:27,080
Speaker 5: have to kind of already have them a third or

1583
01:13:27,160 --> 01:13:29,880
Speaker 5: halfway into the new thing that you want to do

1584
01:13:30,479 --> 01:13:33,360
Speaker 5: before then you you let them know, like hey, let's

1585
01:13:33,360 --> 01:13:35,160
Speaker 5: try this new thing, and then let's do this new thing,

1586
01:13:35,200 --> 01:13:37,599
Speaker 5: and like hey, we're already here, let's let's go into it.

1587
01:13:37,640 --> 01:13:39,840
Speaker 5: And then I was more than reciprocal to it.

1588
01:13:39,960 --> 01:13:43,280
Speaker 3: Breaking news, guys, breaking news. If you want your relationship

1589
01:13:43,320 --> 01:13:47,080
Speaker 3: to work, you got to learn some shit and try

1590
01:13:47,120 --> 01:13:49,320
Speaker 3: some new shit. You can't use all the same old

1591
01:13:49,360 --> 01:13:51,120
Speaker 3: tools or the no tools and.

1592
01:13:51,120 --> 01:13:53,479
Speaker 1: Expect the same result a different result.

1593
01:13:53,800 --> 01:13:57,559
Speaker 3: You have to literally try new things in practices and

1594
01:13:57,640 --> 01:14:00,040
Speaker 3: act on them, just like going to the gym, and

1595
01:14:00,120 --> 01:14:03,720
Speaker 3: order for the relationship to be successful, because there are

1596
01:14:03,720 --> 01:14:06,120
Speaker 3: going to be times where you don't like motherfuckers like

1597
01:14:06,200 --> 01:14:08,759
Speaker 3: you love them. But then if you can literally allow

1598
01:14:08,800 --> 01:14:11,160
Speaker 3: a conflict to pull you more apart and more a

1599
01:14:11,160 --> 01:14:13,439
Speaker 3: part and more apart with now ever having a reset

1600
01:14:13,760 --> 01:14:15,920
Speaker 3: just because you were unwilling to be like Okay, let's

1601
01:14:15,920 --> 01:14:20,680
Speaker 3: try the fucking forehead thing some point always gonna be

1602
01:14:20,720 --> 01:14:23,080
Speaker 3: like whatever, fuck it I've never done the ship before.

1603
01:14:23,520 --> 01:14:26,519
Speaker 3: Fuck it, let's breathe together, okay, you know, like it

1604
01:14:26,600 --> 01:14:27,360
Speaker 3: sounds like it's.

1605
01:14:27,200 --> 01:14:29,600
Speaker 1: I mean and it's and it's it sounds crazy.

1606
01:14:29,520 --> 01:14:32,519
Speaker 3: Or hippy ship or but it is the things that

1607
01:14:32,520 --> 01:14:35,240
Speaker 3: we've both like. I think that the biggest thing in

1608
01:14:35,280 --> 01:14:37,720
Speaker 3: like the TNTRA is like some of the practices are

1609
01:14:37,760 --> 01:14:42,720
Speaker 3: so deeply basic, but it's like that's we're missing the

1610
01:14:42,800 --> 01:14:43,759
Speaker 3: very basic foundation.

1611
01:14:43,920 --> 01:14:45,920
Speaker 7: Contact supposed to be basic.

1612
01:14:46,439 --> 01:14:47,920
Speaker 9: It is, it's what we.

1613
01:14:48,080 --> 01:14:53,360
Speaker 3: Know innately anyway, and sometimes we fight, we resist the.

1614
01:14:54,880 --> 01:14:56,639
Speaker 9: Urge to do the thing, like oh this is weird

1615
01:14:56,680 --> 01:14:57,560
Speaker 9: or this is cheesy.

1616
01:14:57,840 --> 01:14:58,040
Speaker 2: You know.

1617
01:14:58,120 --> 01:14:59,680
Speaker 3: I was just thinking about one time we were like

1618
01:14:59,800 --> 01:15:02,519
Speaker 3: in Union, we were having sex in Orlando, or we

1619
01:15:02,520 --> 01:15:05,000
Speaker 3: weren't even having sex. Put his hand on my pussy

1620
01:15:05,040 --> 01:15:07,200
Speaker 3: and he was like speaking to her, and he's like,

1621
01:15:07,240 --> 01:15:10,519
Speaker 3: you say something, and I literally could not find any words.

1622
01:15:10,560 --> 01:15:12,400
Speaker 3: And I was like, what the fuck? Why can he

1623
01:15:12,479 --> 01:15:13,000
Speaker 3: say stuff?

1624
01:15:13,000 --> 01:15:13,559
Speaker 9: And I can't?

1625
01:15:14,000 --> 01:15:16,680
Speaker 3: And it was so overwhelming and emotional for me, but

1626
01:15:16,760 --> 01:15:18,360
Speaker 3: I felt held in it, you know, and like that

1627
01:15:18,439 --> 01:15:21,080
Speaker 3: he had even started this conversation that I had given

1628
01:15:21,120 --> 01:15:22,960
Speaker 3: my body to other men and they weren't even thinking

1629
01:15:22,960 --> 01:15:25,080
Speaker 3: about a kind of damn conversation, you know what I mean.

1630
01:15:25,600 --> 01:15:29,720
Speaker 3: And to even something so intuitive for him to do

1631
01:15:29,840 --> 01:15:32,800
Speaker 3: and to say out loud and to just and then

1632
01:15:32,840 --> 01:15:35,439
Speaker 3: to kind of like walk me through that. I was like,

1633
01:15:36,400 --> 01:15:38,880
Speaker 3: thank you God for like honoring that urge to do that,

1634
01:15:38,960 --> 01:15:42,439
Speaker 3: and also for me understanding that I had cut her off.

1635
01:15:42,280 --> 01:15:42,800
Speaker 9: You know what I mean.

1636
01:15:42,840 --> 01:15:44,920
Speaker 3: I couldn't have a conversation because I wasn't even in

1637
01:15:44,960 --> 01:15:45,800
Speaker 3: tune in that way.

1638
01:15:45,880 --> 01:15:46,640
Speaker 9: The line wasn't on.

1639
01:15:47,160 --> 01:15:49,960
Speaker 3: But I think we are so resistant to say the

1640
01:15:50,000 --> 01:15:53,200
Speaker 3: thing and do the thing in relationships that we lose

1641
01:15:53,200 --> 01:15:56,320
Speaker 3: our way, you know. And it's like this is these

1642
01:15:56,360 --> 01:16:00,640
Speaker 3: basic things could be the fucking either the killer or

1643
01:16:00,720 --> 01:16:02,320
Speaker 3: I mean, they will not be the killer, but like,

1644
01:16:02,520 --> 01:16:05,000
Speaker 3: these basic things could be the gift that you give

1645
01:16:05,040 --> 01:16:07,559
Speaker 3: your relationship that makes it last, or you could just

1646
01:16:07,640 --> 01:16:10,080
Speaker 3: go in blindly like we've been doing and then get

1647
01:16:10,120 --> 01:16:10,759
Speaker 3: no results.

1648
01:16:11,560 --> 01:16:13,400
Speaker 5: And that's why me and Shachem is very important to

1649
01:16:13,400 --> 01:16:15,840
Speaker 5: this couple's a true because one thing we're bringing back

1650
01:16:16,240 --> 01:16:18,720
Speaker 5: is tangible things and tools that the men can use

1651
01:16:18,800 --> 01:16:22,919
Speaker 5: in their relationship. It's not a bunch of just feminine

1652
01:16:22,960 --> 01:16:26,519
Speaker 5: based things, which is fine, which is fine, but we

1653
01:16:26,640 --> 01:16:28,920
Speaker 5: really need to get back into the true masculinity and

1654
01:16:29,000 --> 01:16:31,599
Speaker 5: things that men can actually use and actionable things, not

1655
01:16:31,720 --> 01:16:34,160
Speaker 5: just you know, just go and say these things. My

1656
01:16:34,240 --> 01:16:36,760
Speaker 5: brother's like, no, there's actually men need to move in

1657
01:16:36,840 --> 01:16:40,640
Speaker 5: the physical and do things physically, and let it be

1658
01:16:40,760 --> 01:16:42,559
Speaker 5: known that you know a lot of the things that

1659
01:16:42,760 --> 01:16:44,960
Speaker 5: you're told to do or can do aren't corny or

1660
01:16:45,000 --> 01:16:45,439
Speaker 5: bad things.

1661
01:16:45,439 --> 01:16:47,960
Speaker 7: It's actually things that you need to be doing.

1662
01:16:48,160 --> 01:16:51,439
Speaker 5: And we've been led astray by a lot of toxic

1663
01:16:51,520 --> 01:16:54,280
Speaker 5: masculinity and a lot of toxic wording from love them

1664
01:16:54,280 --> 01:16:57,920
Speaker 5: so much, but our ancestors, and we need to take

1665
01:16:58,000 --> 01:17:01,240
Speaker 5: back the reins on masculinity and manhood and what the

1666
01:17:01,240 --> 01:17:03,040
Speaker 5: real true masculinity is.

1667
01:17:03,280 --> 01:17:04,200
Speaker 7: And that's what we're here to do.

1668
01:17:04,960 --> 01:17:07,280
Speaker 1: What's the real true masculinity? What does that? What does

1669
01:17:07,520 --> 01:17:09,760
Speaker 1: real true masculinity.

1670
01:17:09,040 --> 01:17:09,519
Speaker 9: Mean to you?

1671
01:17:09,800 --> 01:17:12,400
Speaker 3: Before you, guys, go to real true masculinity, pull a

1672
01:17:12,439 --> 01:17:13,040
Speaker 3: card for me.

1673
01:17:13,760 --> 01:17:16,400
Speaker 2: We're on the topic if true every card is a

1674
01:17:16,400 --> 01:17:17,360
Speaker 2: person masculinity.

1675
01:17:17,800 --> 01:17:22,560
Speaker 7: If you guys, okay, I look at that beautiful the

1676
01:17:22,640 --> 01:17:32,639
Speaker 7: hang man on one of four cups. Four cups.

1677
01:17:33,240 --> 01:17:34,160
Speaker 9: Now go ahead into.

1678
01:17:35,840 --> 01:17:41,320
Speaker 4: A right, truly, Brooks, that looks like that looks like

1679
01:17:41,760 --> 01:17:44,840
Speaker 4: I literally was like that leanked up against my tree,

1680
01:17:44,840 --> 01:17:46,080
Speaker 4: trying to figure this ship out.

1681
01:17:47,160 --> 01:17:48,920
Speaker 5: What does true masculine look like for you, my brother

1682
01:17:49,000 --> 01:17:50,680
Speaker 5: these days? What is the real masculinity?

1683
01:17:50,840 --> 01:17:51,360
Speaker 7: Not that move?

1684
01:17:51,960 --> 01:17:56,519
Speaker 10: To me, true masculinity is the embodiment of all of

1685
01:17:56,560 --> 01:18:01,200
Speaker 10: the divine elements of the sun. It's life giving, it's

1686
01:18:01,320 --> 01:18:08,519
Speaker 10: life serving as it brings and cultivates things that are seated.

1687
01:18:09,160 --> 01:18:11,360
Speaker 10: So I think that's one of the most important things

1688
01:18:11,400 --> 01:18:12,960
Speaker 10: that we can do, is to come into your life

1689
01:18:12,960 --> 01:18:14,599
Speaker 10: and help cultivate what's already there.

1690
01:18:15,200 --> 01:18:17,360
Speaker 6: So I think that's one of the things of the sense.

1691
01:18:17,720 --> 01:18:22,559
Speaker 10: I think it is the embodiment representation son. That is

1692
01:18:22,680 --> 01:18:25,320
Speaker 10: my philosophy to such a very difficult question.

1693
01:18:26,960 --> 01:18:28,320
Speaker 9: That is a very complex question.

1694
01:18:28,400 --> 01:18:30,360
Speaker 7: I've been thinking that.

1695
01:18:30,400 --> 01:18:32,800
Speaker 1: It's hard questions.

1696
01:18:32,640 --> 01:18:36,280
Speaker 5: It's a movement with intention and decision making that's in

1697
01:18:36,400 --> 01:18:37,679
Speaker 5: confidence and not in fair.

1698
01:18:38,200 --> 01:18:39,200
Speaker 7: I think a lot of the.

1699
01:18:39,160 --> 01:18:41,400
Speaker 5: Things that we've been taught is based on like men

1700
01:18:41,520 --> 01:18:43,960
Speaker 5: and fear and fear of like women are hurting them

1701
01:18:44,040 --> 01:18:47,080
Speaker 5: and how you can do whatever you can to stay

1702
01:18:47,120 --> 01:18:49,640
Speaker 5: in power to avoid the hurt. And it's like the

1703
01:18:49,640 --> 01:18:51,960
Speaker 5: pain is meant to be healed, not to be feared.

1704
01:18:52,360 --> 01:18:55,799
Speaker 5: And so I think that that's more so the position

1705
01:18:55,880 --> 01:18:57,800
Speaker 5: that I come from when I'm talking about like just

1706
01:18:57,840 --> 01:18:59,880
Speaker 5: being real and just being true to yourself and your

1707
01:19:00,479 --> 01:19:03,880
Speaker 5: and when you stop moving in a sense of like

1708
01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:05,960
Speaker 5: being scared that women are going to hurt you, or

1709
01:19:06,400 --> 01:19:08,160
Speaker 5: the girl that hurts you when you were fourteen years

1710
01:19:08,200 --> 01:19:09,760
Speaker 5: old is going to break your heart again. It's going

1711
01:19:09,840 --> 01:19:11,640
Speaker 5: to be so painful, and it's like, it's fine. If

1712
01:19:11,640 --> 01:19:14,519
Speaker 5: it's painful, you will be fine. Everything will be okay,

1713
01:19:14,560 --> 01:19:16,160
Speaker 5: and you will find a way to heal and then

1714
01:19:16,280 --> 01:19:18,280
Speaker 5: move on to the woman that's never going to hurt

1715
01:19:18,280 --> 01:19:20,280
Speaker 5: you ever again, or if she does hurt you, then

1716
01:19:20,320 --> 01:19:21,920
Speaker 5: you have the tools which are going to show you

1717
01:19:21,960 --> 01:19:24,080
Speaker 5: in the cubs with truth to.

1718
01:19:23,680 --> 01:19:25,040
Speaker 7: Overcome and be strong.

1719
01:19:25,160 --> 01:19:27,360
Speaker 5: And then that is how you become strong in your

1720
01:19:27,360 --> 01:19:30,519
Speaker 5: relationship and then strong within yourself and then also coming

1721
01:19:30,880 --> 01:19:33,240
Speaker 5: to the forefront of your confidence.

1722
01:19:34,840 --> 01:19:36,560
Speaker 7: We're lacking a lot of confidence.

1723
01:19:36,120 --> 01:19:38,439
Speaker 5: These days in our decision making, not sure what we

1724
01:19:38,479 --> 01:19:42,680
Speaker 5: should do and following different stupid shit like men on

1725
01:19:42,760 --> 01:19:47,040
Speaker 5: podcasts and freaking fright and whatever that that old man

1726
01:19:47,160 --> 01:19:50,280
Speaker 5: was that died sleeping with the Kevin.

1727
01:19:50,080 --> 01:19:52,880
Speaker 6: Sam I believe that part of the masculine is the

1728
01:19:52,960 --> 01:19:53,439
Speaker 6: knowing that.

1729
01:19:53,600 --> 01:19:56,760
Speaker 10: Yeah, that idea of even though it's a modified knowing

1730
01:19:56,760 --> 01:19:58,600
Speaker 10: on a moment's moment basis.

1731
01:19:58,240 --> 01:20:01,400
Speaker 6: Throughout your maturation process, it's the knowing.

1732
01:20:01,520 --> 01:20:05,719
Speaker 10: It's the it's the very linear and concise decision making

1733
01:20:06,240 --> 01:20:10,240
Speaker 10: that brings about the slow but sure progressions of life.

1734
01:20:10,320 --> 01:20:12,960
Speaker 10: If we didn't care about the progress, we would just

1735
01:20:13,000 --> 01:20:16,400
Speaker 10: be And that's that's fine too. If there's something about

1736
01:20:16,400 --> 01:20:19,439
Speaker 10: the mask and that keeps pulling forward. So I think

1737
01:20:19,479 --> 01:20:24,240
Speaker 10: that knowing requires us to pull forward efficiently. I think

1738
01:20:24,240 --> 01:20:25,320
Speaker 10: that's really important too.

1739
01:20:25,920 --> 01:20:28,679
Speaker 9: Do you think that the Kevin Samuels and the followers

1740
01:20:28,680 --> 01:20:32,040
Speaker 9: of Kevin Samuels thought that they were pushing forward a movement?

1741
01:20:32,320 --> 01:20:35,599
Speaker 10: Yeah, you know, so they were really Look, if we

1742
01:20:35,720 --> 01:20:39,760
Speaker 10: want to talk tantra, that means that everything is interweaved

1743
01:20:39,840 --> 01:20:42,679
Speaker 10: into one. And if everything is intw weaved into one,

1744
01:20:42,800 --> 01:20:45,960
Speaker 10: then that means that every single seed has a progressive

1745
01:20:46,000 --> 01:20:49,160
Speaker 10: state and it has a trajectory and it's moving for

1746
01:20:49,200 --> 01:20:53,000
Speaker 10: some reason. So whatever he did to serve his purpose here,

1747
01:20:53,680 --> 01:20:56,120
Speaker 10: whether it impacted good or bad, the whole point is

1748
01:20:56,120 --> 01:20:59,640
Speaker 10: that it probably had a paralleled trajectory as somebody who

1749
01:20:59,680 --> 01:21:02,200
Speaker 10: would be doing good, as somebody who would be lost.

1750
01:21:02,240 --> 01:21:05,120
Speaker 10: Everybody's going to be ping pong in their way through

1751
01:21:05,200 --> 01:21:08,040
Speaker 10: this shit, you know. So I think he served a purpose.

1752
01:21:08,080 --> 01:21:10,320
Speaker 10: It probably just wasn't a purpose for us to necessarily

1753
01:21:11,160 --> 01:21:13,960
Speaker 10: live off of. You know, there's other people who have

1754
01:21:14,320 --> 01:21:15,960
Speaker 10: some people look at them like they're nuts.

1755
01:21:16,120 --> 01:21:16,320
Speaker 6: You know.

1756
01:21:17,520 --> 01:21:19,680
Speaker 10: For instance, Donnie Hathaway is on the mind. I love

1757
01:21:19,720 --> 01:21:22,560
Speaker 10: Donnie Hathaway. He was a paranoid schizophrenic. He was a

1758
01:21:22,680 --> 01:21:26,960
Speaker 10: very scary man. So we all have to have somebody

1759
01:21:27,240 --> 01:21:29,439
Speaker 10: who's making sense somewhere to help us make sense of it,

1760
01:21:29,479 --> 01:21:30,920
Speaker 10: and we just keep ping pong, ping pong.

1761
01:21:31,920 --> 01:21:34,240
Speaker 6: I think masculinely loves that. We see that.

1762
01:21:34,320 --> 01:21:36,960
Speaker 10: Now with longer form content on YouTube, we murder it

1763
01:21:37,040 --> 01:21:40,040
Speaker 10: every day, like we want to see motivational talking and

1764
01:21:40,120 --> 01:21:43,400
Speaker 10: Jordan Peterson lectures and philosophy.

1765
01:21:42,760 --> 01:21:43,639
Speaker 6: And blah blah blah.

1766
01:21:43,680 --> 01:21:46,479
Speaker 10: And if you go and just type in male motivation

1767
01:21:46,760 --> 01:21:50,200
Speaker 10: you see these crazy numbers. But it's because we are

1768
01:21:50,280 --> 01:21:53,439
Speaker 10: after a knowing. There's something that we feel like, even

1769
01:21:53,479 --> 01:21:57,040
Speaker 10: though we know enough to survive, there's something we feel

1770
01:21:57,040 --> 01:21:58,479
Speaker 10: like is out there that we have to figure out

1771
01:21:58,479 --> 01:21:59,280
Speaker 10: so that we can thrive.

1772
01:21:59,360 --> 01:22:00,240
Speaker 6: That's the main thing.

1773
01:22:00,600 --> 01:22:02,799
Speaker 5: Yeah, And I think also a lot of young boys.

1774
01:22:03,120 --> 01:22:06,519
Speaker 5: We missed out on the mentorship phase, that that pivotal

1775
01:22:06,560 --> 01:22:11,040
Speaker 5: teenage phase where you need a masculine presence in your life.

1776
01:22:11,360 --> 01:22:12,519
Speaker 7: A lot of us missed out on that.

1777
01:22:12,600 --> 01:22:14,760
Speaker 5: And so when it comes to like listening to fucking

1778
01:22:14,800 --> 01:22:18,320
Speaker 5: Kevin Samuels to our lives, it's like that's our mentoring phase.

1779
01:22:18,400 --> 01:22:22,040
Speaker 5: Like we are we are leaders innately and naturally, but

1780
01:22:22,120 --> 01:22:24,439
Speaker 5: we're always looking for a mentor to show us how

1781
01:22:24,439 --> 01:22:26,880
Speaker 5: to lead right. And so when it came to like

1782
01:22:27,160 --> 01:22:29,760
Speaker 5: these type of like whether it be your your friend

1783
01:22:29,760 --> 01:22:33,960
Speaker 5: at school or podcast or Instagram with Kevin, then you're

1784
01:22:34,000 --> 01:22:38,800
Speaker 5: always looking for what you can do to optimize your

1785
01:22:38,840 --> 01:22:43,280
Speaker 5: time on this earth and then get to the pinnacle

1786
01:22:43,360 --> 01:22:44,839
Speaker 5: of your masculinity as fast.

1787
01:22:44,680 --> 01:22:45,080
Speaker 7: As you can.

1788
01:22:45,160 --> 01:22:48,240
Speaker 9: And unfortunately, so many of men discovered Kevin Samuel.

1789
01:22:48,360 --> 01:22:52,920
Speaker 5: But to Toim's point and but to Sir Kevin's point,

1790
01:22:53,040 --> 01:22:57,000
Speaker 5: was that we realized that Kevin Samuels is what happens

1791
01:22:57,000 --> 01:23:00,360
Speaker 5: when men don't speak up against like men like Kevin

1792
01:23:00,400 --> 01:23:03,479
Speaker 5: Samuels and say like, you're a fucking idiot, that makes

1793
01:23:03,520 --> 01:23:06,439
Speaker 5: no fucking sense. Nobody told him that early in his life.

1794
01:23:06,439 --> 01:23:07,800
Speaker 5: So when he got to the point where he got

1795
01:23:07,840 --> 01:23:11,040
Speaker 5: great beard, a great beard. He led on with that

1796
01:23:11,240 --> 01:23:14,960
Speaker 5: so long and he mastered that type of that type

1797
01:23:14,960 --> 01:23:18,120
Speaker 5: of whatever the fuck he was doing, and then he

1798
01:23:18,320 --> 01:23:21,880
Speaker 5: was able to regurgitate it that with such confidence that

1799
01:23:22,000 --> 01:23:25,280
Speaker 5: it sounded believable. But we have gotten to the point

1800
01:23:25,280 --> 01:23:27,559
Speaker 5: of realizing that that is what happens when you don't

1801
01:23:27,600 --> 01:23:30,840
Speaker 5: stop it before it goes too far. And so in essence,

1802
01:23:30,920 --> 01:23:34,240
Speaker 5: what happened was, I think there are more good people

1803
01:23:34,280 --> 01:23:36,160
Speaker 5: than bad in this world. I think that there are

1804
01:23:36,280 --> 01:23:39,280
Speaker 5: just more people that don't say anything than people that

1805
01:23:39,360 --> 01:23:40,200
Speaker 5: do say something.

1806
01:23:40,479 --> 01:23:43,040
Speaker 7: And so I think that that we've.

1807
01:23:43,080 --> 01:23:46,080
Speaker 5: Seen Kevin Samuels made a lot of men go, oh,

1808
01:23:46,080 --> 01:23:48,120
Speaker 5: we need to say something before it goes too far.

1809
01:23:48,160 --> 01:23:50,240
Speaker 5: We can't just let shit just go about the wayside.

1810
01:23:50,320 --> 01:23:53,640
Speaker 5: And that was the result of Kevin Samuels after.

1811
01:23:53,400 --> 01:23:55,519
Speaker 2: His passor what if he was like an actor you guys,

1812
01:23:55,560 --> 01:23:58,120
Speaker 2: and they like hired him for social as a plant.

1813
01:23:58,240 --> 01:24:01,160
Speaker 9: So yeah, social observation. He's like a comedian.

1814
01:24:02,520 --> 01:24:06,240
Speaker 1: You know, as I'm listening to as I'm listening to

1815
01:24:07,200 --> 01:24:08,160
Speaker 1: your both of.

1816
01:24:08,160 --> 01:24:11,320
Speaker 2: Your definition of masculinity, and I'm thinking about just the

1817
01:24:11,360 --> 01:24:14,720
Speaker 2: feminine and just how you know it's evil, how my

1818
01:24:14,840 --> 01:24:19,000
Speaker 2: version of feminity has evolved personally serving women number one,

1819
01:24:19,040 --> 01:24:21,800
Speaker 2: which I think has also expanded my my femininity in

1820
01:24:21,880 --> 01:24:25,519
Speaker 2: ways that I needed deeply more than I ever could

1821
01:24:25,560 --> 01:24:30,679
Speaker 2: have imagined. Where I joyfully love. I love our retreats

1822
01:24:30,680 --> 01:24:33,960
Speaker 2: with women. I love watering women. I love empowering them.

1823
01:24:34,000 --> 01:24:37,519
Speaker 2: I love showing them their wild I love showing them

1824
01:24:37,720 --> 01:24:41,640
Speaker 2: what care looks like. I love being able to I

1825
01:24:41,640 --> 01:24:43,840
Speaker 2: think what the feminine needs to be cared for by

1826
01:24:43,880 --> 01:24:48,960
Speaker 2: the feminine at some point. But I also I'm listening

1827
01:24:48,960 --> 01:24:52,600
Speaker 2: to you know, you talk about, you know, how the

1828
01:24:52,640 --> 01:24:55,439
Speaker 2: masculine is has this like just this natural inclination to

1829
01:24:55,920 --> 01:24:59,479
Speaker 2: pull forth, and like you know, I guess essentially pull

1830
01:24:59,479 --> 01:25:01,960
Speaker 2: forth any that are laid, And I think about how

1831
01:25:02,000 --> 01:25:06,320
Speaker 2: the feminine waters those seeds, right, And I think a

1832
01:25:06,360 --> 01:25:10,479
Speaker 2: lot of times women in relationships and just in partnerships.

1833
01:25:09,960 --> 01:25:12,800
Speaker 1: In general, we don't know how to water each other.

1834
01:25:13,360 --> 01:25:15,320
Speaker 1: Like either the water.

1835
01:25:15,120 --> 01:25:17,200
Speaker 2: Has run dry because we're now we like we're tired

1836
01:25:17,200 --> 01:25:18,599
Speaker 2: of your shit and we ain't watering shit over here,

1837
01:25:18,640 --> 01:25:22,400
Speaker 2: no more or water, or we're watering We're not, we're

1838
01:25:22,400 --> 01:25:24,920
Speaker 2: watering you incorrectly. There's something that happened the other day

1839
01:25:25,960 --> 01:25:30,920
Speaker 2: where I felt like I was watering you and and

1840
01:25:30,960 --> 01:25:32,879
Speaker 2: you said to me, like, what I really.

1841
01:25:32,680 --> 01:25:34,720
Speaker 1: Need for you from you is for you to.

1842
01:25:36,640 --> 01:25:38,920
Speaker 2: Like it was essentially like water me and send me off.

1843
01:25:38,960 --> 01:25:40,600
Speaker 2: Don't tell me like not to go do what I

1844
01:25:40,640 --> 01:25:43,200
Speaker 2: need to do. Like I think it was something as

1845
01:25:43,200 --> 01:25:47,000
Speaker 2: it pertained to work, And I thought I was watering

1846
01:25:47,040 --> 01:25:50,040
Speaker 2: you by saying baby like, don't like I'm gonna take Elliott,

1847
01:25:50,040 --> 01:25:51,160
Speaker 2: me go rest.

1848
01:25:51,200 --> 01:25:52,200
Speaker 1: I want you to rest.

1849
01:25:52,280 --> 01:25:55,840
Speaker 2: I want you to like let me just like nurture you,

1850
01:25:56,280 --> 01:26:00,000
Speaker 2: like whatever, Like nurture you really is what it was.

1851
01:26:00,280 --> 01:26:02,439
Speaker 2: And it was like that's not what you needed at

1852
01:26:02,439 --> 01:26:04,560
Speaker 2: that time. You needed the nurturing, but you needed the

1853
01:26:04,640 --> 01:26:06,559
Speaker 2: nurturings that you could go out into the world and

1854
01:26:06,600 --> 01:26:08,080
Speaker 2: get to what it is that you need to get to.

1855
01:26:08,560 --> 01:26:09,200
Speaker 1: And I think.

1856
01:26:10,560 --> 01:26:13,320
Speaker 2: Women miss the mark sometimes with that, and we think

1857
01:26:13,360 --> 01:26:15,559
Speaker 2: that we're doing right by our men in there in

1858
01:26:15,600 --> 01:26:17,840
Speaker 2: our watering, and then our men don't feel watered, and

1859
01:26:17,840 --> 01:26:19,960
Speaker 2: then we're so fucking confused, like what the fuck I

1860
01:26:19,960 --> 01:26:22,479
Speaker 2: did this? I did X, Y, and Z, and but

1861
01:26:22,479 --> 01:26:24,320
Speaker 2: are you're still not happy? Like I give you pussy,

1862
01:26:24,400 --> 01:26:26,920
Speaker 2: I did this. I gave that, you know, you know

1863
01:26:27,040 --> 01:26:33,040
Speaker 2: I could you dinner like and and that's and that's

1864
01:26:33,040 --> 01:26:35,160
Speaker 2: another thing that I'm excited for in this retreat is

1865
01:26:35,200 --> 01:26:40,760
Speaker 2: like really giving couples the opportunity to playfully inquire in

1866
01:26:40,840 --> 01:26:42,960
Speaker 2: like are we watering each other the way that we

1867
01:26:43,040 --> 01:26:43,760
Speaker 2: really want to be.

1868
01:26:43,720 --> 01:26:46,759
Speaker 10: Watered especially couples we've been together for a while, because

1869
01:26:47,120 --> 01:26:49,519
Speaker 10: you might think you want the same watering that you

1870
01:26:49,560 --> 01:26:51,360
Speaker 10: want that three years ago, and it's not.

1871
01:26:52,120 --> 01:26:54,960
Speaker 2: And then men don't know how to even ask for it,

1872
01:26:55,080 --> 01:26:56,680
Speaker 2: or women don't know how to ask for it, and

1873
01:26:56,720 --> 01:26:59,160
Speaker 2: like the conversation, they don't even know how to start

1874
01:26:59,160 --> 01:27:02,000
Speaker 2: the conversation because it feels heavy, it feels like it

1875
01:27:02,080 --> 01:27:06,200
Speaker 2: might go wrong. So I feel like in this, in

1876
01:27:06,200 --> 01:27:10,840
Speaker 2: this space that we're creating, it will give couples an

1877
01:27:10,880 --> 01:27:15,640
Speaker 2: opportunity to reconnect in that way and be able to

1878
01:27:15,720 --> 01:27:20,160
Speaker 2: speak their truth in a way that you won't feel defensive,

1879
01:27:20,760 --> 01:27:24,200
Speaker 2: that you won't feel attacked, where it's like no, let's

1880
01:27:24,240 --> 01:27:26,880
Speaker 2: do it, and let's figure it out and let's play

1881
01:27:26,920 --> 01:27:28,759
Speaker 2: through it and let's go back.

1882
01:27:28,600 --> 01:27:29,960
Speaker 1: To our room with assignments.

1883
01:27:30,040 --> 01:27:33,080
Speaker 2: And and also like the women are going to be

1884
01:27:33,160 --> 01:27:36,160
Speaker 2: you know, feeding the things in that we know like hey, nigga,

1885
01:27:36,320 --> 01:27:39,360
Speaker 2: like this is what your bitch wants, and like, hey, bitch,

1886
01:27:39,439 --> 01:27:41,519
Speaker 2: this is what he needs, you know, So that like

1887
01:27:42,000 --> 01:27:45,280
Speaker 2: sometimes it's hard to say the thing. It's very important

1888
01:27:45,280 --> 01:27:47,599
Speaker 2: that you do, but sometimes you do need some like

1889
01:27:47,640 --> 01:27:53,559
Speaker 2: a a mediator of sorts, a clear a clear playing

1890
01:27:53,600 --> 01:27:55,640
Speaker 2: space where you're like, we're here to put it on

1891
01:27:55,680 --> 01:27:56,160
Speaker 2: the table.

1892
01:27:56,400 --> 01:27:57,200
Speaker 9: We have someone else.

1893
01:27:57,400 --> 01:27:59,400
Speaker 2: It's all and it's all love and it's all play

1894
01:27:59,560 --> 01:28:01,439
Speaker 2: and we're all we're all gonna be a paradise. So

1895
01:28:01,479 --> 01:28:04,519
Speaker 2: it's just like the stakes are seem like in a

1896
01:28:04,560 --> 01:28:07,000
Speaker 2: better playing field. When you're working, you got kids screaming,

1897
01:28:07,040 --> 01:28:08,200
Speaker 2: and dinner has been made.

1898
01:28:08,320 --> 01:28:08,479
Speaker 9: You know.

1899
01:28:08,560 --> 01:28:12,120
Speaker 3: It's like I'm also excited to learn, like to learn

1900
01:28:12,200 --> 01:28:13,920
Speaker 3: from the couple who've been together a really long time,

1901
01:28:14,000 --> 01:28:16,280
Speaker 3: because I think that's something we missed too in this community,

1902
01:28:16,360 --> 01:28:20,320
Speaker 3: is like exchange of like what's working for you. We're

1903
01:28:20,320 --> 01:28:22,760
Speaker 3: in a culture of like god, do what the wife

1904
01:28:22,840 --> 01:28:26,120
Speaker 3: says or also like you know, like that wife, happy life. Yeah,

1905
01:28:26,120 --> 01:28:27,880
Speaker 3: like you don't have sex after a certain amount of time,

1906
01:28:27,920 --> 01:28:29,160
Speaker 3: you don't feel the same way they get it on

1907
01:28:29,200 --> 01:28:32,639
Speaker 3: your fucking nerves. But it's like yeah, like I don't know,

1908
01:28:32,680 --> 01:28:35,200
Speaker 3: bringing it back and being able to learn from other

1909
01:28:35,240 --> 01:28:38,080
Speaker 3: people and what like bringing back the community part of

1910
01:28:38,120 --> 01:28:42,639
Speaker 3: like love, you know how, like passing around the secrets

1911
01:28:42,680 --> 01:28:45,080
Speaker 3: that work and having open conversations so you can be

1912
01:28:45,120 --> 01:28:47,880
Speaker 3: accountable and also be like, oh, this is like maybe

1913
01:28:48,040 --> 01:28:50,559
Speaker 3: your brother has a he can explain something to your

1914
01:28:50,720 --> 01:28:52,680
Speaker 3: you know, your somebody else in a way that you

1915
01:28:52,680 --> 01:28:53,799
Speaker 3: didn't understand before.

1916
01:28:53,920 --> 01:28:56,200
Speaker 10: You know what I mean, something different when it's from

1917
01:28:56,240 --> 01:28:58,160
Speaker 10: someone else, And it doesn't even have to be the

1918
01:28:58,160 --> 01:28:59,200
Speaker 10: people leading liberatory.

1919
01:28:59,240 --> 01:29:00,960
Speaker 6: It could be somebody you something.

1920
01:29:00,920 --> 01:29:02,960
Speaker 9: Sitting next to you at the dinner table. So that's

1921
01:29:03,000 --> 01:29:03,680
Speaker 9: always that way.

1922
01:29:03,720 --> 01:29:06,400
Speaker 3: There's never a time I leave without also getting the medicine.

1923
01:29:06,760 --> 01:29:10,479
Speaker 3: So there's something about like doing healing in community in general,

1924
01:29:10,520 --> 01:29:12,320
Speaker 3: which is I think is going to be really special too,

1925
01:29:12,720 --> 01:29:15,320
Speaker 3: And like not to mention like the sex magic that

1926
01:29:15,400 --> 01:29:17,719
Speaker 3: happens when you're exchanging in a place where your nervous

1927
01:29:17,760 --> 01:29:20,559
Speaker 3: system is arrested and you're like, that's manifest some shit

1928
01:29:20,560 --> 01:29:22,800
Speaker 3: while I'm in the jungle while we're making love, you know,

1929
01:29:22,880 --> 01:29:25,599
Speaker 3: and like it's fruitful there and just like just like

1930
01:29:25,800 --> 01:29:29,639
Speaker 3: you know, like the entity is it like can can

1931
01:29:29,680 --> 01:29:33,439
Speaker 3: blossom into something tangible if you harness your energy in

1932
01:29:33,479 --> 01:29:34,439
Speaker 3: a way that's fruitful.

1933
01:29:34,720 --> 01:29:36,320
Speaker 5: Yeah, I can't wait for the men to see how

1934
01:29:36,439 --> 01:29:39,680
Speaker 5: much strength there is in the healing and coming to

1935
01:29:39,760 --> 01:29:42,120
Speaker 5: something like this, because you know a lot of men

1936
01:29:42,160 --> 01:29:43,920
Speaker 5: hesitations just feel like things are a waste of time,

1937
01:29:43,960 --> 01:29:46,000
Speaker 5: and we really like to optimize on our time and

1938
01:29:46,040 --> 01:29:50,160
Speaker 5: make sure like we've got shit going on and we're

1939
01:29:50,160 --> 01:29:51,360
Speaker 5: not just bullshit.

1940
01:29:52,240 --> 01:29:55,040
Speaker 3: And this is gonna be a vacation that you don't

1941
01:29:55,040 --> 01:29:56,760
Speaker 3: even have to plan. You're gonna be taken care of,

1942
01:29:56,880 --> 01:29:58,320
Speaker 3: it's gonna be sexy, it's gonna be fun.

1943
01:29:58,680 --> 01:30:00,120
Speaker 9: We're gonna explore the land.

1944
01:30:00,080 --> 01:30:02,520
Speaker 7: And just let us take care of your relationship.

1945
01:30:02,640 --> 01:30:04,400
Speaker 3: Yeah, let us take care of you so that you

1946
01:30:04,439 --> 01:30:07,240
Speaker 3: could take care of your relationship. You know, like I'm

1947
01:30:07,240 --> 01:30:08,720
Speaker 3: gonna give you the tools and I'm gonna make sure

1948
01:30:08,760 --> 01:30:09,680
Speaker 3: you don't have to worry about shit.

1949
01:30:09,760 --> 01:30:10,320
Speaker 9: You're gonna be.

1950
01:30:10,280 --> 01:30:12,920
Speaker 3: Fed, you're gonna be happy, you're gonna be sunshining, you're

1951
01:30:12,920 --> 01:30:13,960
Speaker 3: gonna be accommodated.

1952
01:30:14,160 --> 01:30:16,000
Speaker 7: You don't feel stronger, Yeah, it's.

1953
01:30:15,840 --> 01:30:19,639
Speaker 3: Just gonna feel back, Phil come back feeling in tune

1954
01:30:20,200 --> 01:30:23,000
Speaker 3: and lighter and closer and closer that you could like

1955
01:30:23,080 --> 01:30:25,160
Speaker 3: go back to the into the world and kick ass

1956
01:30:25,200 --> 01:30:28,519
Speaker 3: and take you know, go get with whatever's on the

1957
01:30:28,520 --> 01:30:31,120
Speaker 3: table that you haven't been getting because you're too caught

1958
01:30:31,160 --> 01:30:31,840
Speaker 3: up in the fog.

1959
01:30:34,760 --> 01:30:39,160
Speaker 9: I got the Hangedman. You want to hear it? Tit

1960
01:30:39,200 --> 01:30:41,200
Speaker 9: tarot time.

1961
01:30:50,560 --> 01:30:52,880
Speaker 3: The Hangman reminds you that sometimes you have to put

1962
01:30:52,920 --> 01:30:55,240
Speaker 3: everything on hold before you can take the next step,

1963
01:30:55,479 --> 01:30:57,439
Speaker 3: or the universe will do it on your behalf, and

1964
01:30:57,479 --> 01:30:59,559
Speaker 3: it may not always be at the most convenient time.

1965
01:31:00,320 --> 01:31:02,240
Speaker 3: You may have heard the saying what got you here

1966
01:31:02,360 --> 01:31:04,759
Speaker 3: won't get you there, and that indeed is a play

1967
01:31:04,880 --> 01:31:07,679
Speaker 3: in this card. The Hangman calls for you to release

1968
01:31:07,720 --> 01:31:10,960
Speaker 3: the old mental models and behavior patterns that no longer

1969
01:31:11,000 --> 01:31:13,280
Speaker 3: serve you, so you can see the world from a

1970
01:31:13,320 --> 01:31:16,320
Speaker 3: new perspective and embrace new opportunities that would have otherwise

1971
01:31:16,360 --> 01:31:19,080
Speaker 3: been hidden from you if you didn't hit the brakes.

1972
01:31:19,200 --> 01:31:21,400
Speaker 9: Wow, here's the thing.

1973
01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:25,240
Speaker 3: These pauses can be voluntary or involuntary. If you tune

1974
01:31:25,280 --> 01:31:27,479
Speaker 3: in with your intuition, you'll start to have a sense

1975
01:31:27,520 --> 01:31:29,760
Speaker 3: for when it's time to hit the brakes and put

1976
01:31:29,800 --> 01:31:32,160
Speaker 3: things on hold before things get out of hand.

1977
01:31:32,640 --> 01:31:34,040
Speaker 9: But if you're out of.

1978
01:31:34,080 --> 01:31:37,880
Speaker 3: Alignment and obvious and oblivious to those intuitive signs, the

1979
01:31:37,960 --> 01:31:40,360
Speaker 3: universe will probably put things on hold for you in

1980
01:31:40,400 --> 01:31:43,720
Speaker 3: the form of continued obstacles, ill health, and breakdowns. When

1981
01:31:43,720 --> 01:31:46,320
Speaker 3: you sense the pause coming, pay attention to it. Otherwise

1982
01:31:46,360 --> 01:31:49,120
Speaker 3: the universe will turn up the volume until you can't

1983
01:31:49,160 --> 01:31:52,800
Speaker 3: ignore it any longer. When you disappears, your project and

1984
01:31:52,840 --> 01:31:55,519
Speaker 3: activities may be coming to an unexpected and abrupt halt.

1985
01:31:55,960 --> 01:31:58,840
Speaker 3: Don't keep pushing forward hoping that the force will drive

1986
01:31:58,880 --> 01:32:01,240
Speaker 3: you to where you want to go. That surrender to

1987
01:32:01,280 --> 01:32:05,000
Speaker 3: the opportunity to pause and view it as a chance

1988
01:32:05,080 --> 01:32:08,120
Speaker 3: to reassess and reevaluate where you are on your path.

1989
01:32:08,240 --> 01:32:11,960
Speaker 3: Something new is emerging and you won't allow won't be

1990
01:32:12,000 --> 01:32:14,040
Speaker 3: able to see unless you allow the time and space

1991
01:32:14,080 --> 01:32:15,040
Speaker 3: for it to come through.

1992
01:32:15,120 --> 01:32:17,880
Speaker 1: Time and space. I think that's all covers everything. We

1993
01:32:18,200 --> 01:32:19,880
Speaker 1: so many of the things we just talked about.

1994
01:32:20,880 --> 01:32:23,720
Speaker 2: Got to make the time and space for clarity.

1995
01:32:24,520 --> 01:32:27,240
Speaker 7: I sheeted that one.

1996
01:32:28,400 --> 01:32:33,080
Speaker 2: And my love. You pulled the four of Cups and

1997
01:32:33,240 --> 01:32:34,160
Speaker 2: this no I.

1998
01:32:34,160 --> 01:32:36,679
Speaker 5: Like about this card. It's like you already got three cups.

1999
01:32:36,920 --> 01:32:38,920
Speaker 5: There's something like I think you need another cup.

2000
01:32:40,320 --> 01:32:45,240
Speaker 3: You're the cups are dealing in emotions.

2001
01:32:44,760 --> 01:32:46,439
Speaker 2: And when the four of Cups turns up in a terror,

2002
01:32:46,479 --> 01:32:49,640
Speaker 2: reading new invitations and opportunities are flowing to you, but

2003
01:32:49,760 --> 01:32:51,840
Speaker 2: for now you're saying no and turning them away. Perhaps

2004
01:32:51,880 --> 01:32:54,160
Speaker 2: the prospects don't interest you, or your cup is full,

2005
01:32:54,240 --> 01:32:56,320
Speaker 2: or you already have too much on your plate. Use

2006
01:32:56,360 --> 01:32:58,920
Speaker 2: discernment to decide on what is truly important to you,

2007
01:32:59,000 --> 01:33:02,559
Speaker 2: and don't be afraid to decline new projects that don't

2008
01:33:02,600 --> 01:33:05,200
Speaker 2: align with your future path. The Four of Cups can

2009
01:33:05,240 --> 01:33:08,360
Speaker 2: appear when you are bored or dissatisfied with your everyday life.

2010
01:33:08,400 --> 01:33:12,880
Speaker 2: You may feel disengaged, apathetic, or unmotivated. Maybe life has

2011
01:33:12,920 --> 01:33:15,040
Speaker 2: become dull. The Four of Cups invites you to bring

2012
01:33:15,080 --> 01:33:18,000
Speaker 2: your attention inward and reevaluate your situation to find a

2013
01:33:18,040 --> 01:33:20,400
Speaker 2: deeper meaning in what you do. You may have found

2014
01:33:20,400 --> 01:33:23,200
Speaker 2: yourself disconnected from your emotional self and inner truth, and

2015
01:33:23,240 --> 01:33:26,120
Speaker 2: need to re establish this connection so you can get

2016
01:33:26,120 --> 01:33:31,240
Speaker 2: a greater sense of purpose and direction. What else, However,

2017
01:33:31,320 --> 01:33:33,680
Speaker 2: if you missed the Four of Cups may show that

2018
01:33:33,760 --> 01:33:36,840
Speaker 2: you have shut yourself off from new opportunities because you

2019
01:33:36,880 --> 01:33:40,080
Speaker 2: have been hurt or rejected before. The man in this

2020
01:33:40,200 --> 01:33:42,720
Speaker 2: card has his arms crossed as if protecting himself and

2021
01:33:42,720 --> 01:33:45,240
Speaker 2: closing off from the external world. You may have had

2022
01:33:45,280 --> 01:33:48,759
Speaker 2: a relationship end and heartbreak, or experienced failoring your career,

2023
01:33:48,800 --> 01:33:51,920
Speaker 2: and now you want to avoid getting in the same predicament. However,

2024
01:33:52,000 --> 01:33:54,200
Speaker 2: you may miss out on new opportunities that are excellent

2025
01:33:54,240 --> 01:33:56,479
Speaker 2: fit for you. Check in on a sole level in

2026
01:33:56,560 --> 01:33:58,920
Speaker 2: question whether shutting yourself down is the best course of

2027
01:33:58,960 --> 01:34:01,439
Speaker 2: action or if it's time to open up to the

2028
01:34:01,479 --> 01:34:03,639
Speaker 2: possibilities available to you.

2029
01:34:05,520 --> 01:34:07,240
Speaker 9: Wow, we're telling cards.

2030
01:34:07,560 --> 01:34:10,280
Speaker 3: If you were resisting, let this be a sign that

2031
01:34:10,520 --> 01:34:13,439
Speaker 3: maybe it's time to pivot and try something new, like

2032
01:34:13,479 --> 01:34:17,320
Speaker 3: coming on the couple's retreat. Yeah, June fourteenth to the nineteenth. Yes,

2033
01:34:17,439 --> 01:34:19,400
Speaker 3: you can make payments. It's around the corner. There are

2034
01:34:19,400 --> 01:34:21,880
Speaker 3: big discounts. We're gonna be there, We're going to be

2035
01:34:21,920 --> 01:34:23,920
Speaker 3: having fun. It's gonna be good food.

2036
01:34:24,040 --> 01:34:26,280
Speaker 1: We took over this whole property. It's where we do

2037
01:34:26,320 --> 01:34:27,280
Speaker 1: all of our retreats.

2038
01:34:28,240 --> 01:34:33,200
Speaker 2: It's this beautiful sacred grounds and this container that we create.

2039
01:34:33,320 --> 01:34:35,960
Speaker 1: It's just us and we.

2040
01:34:35,960 --> 01:34:38,680
Speaker 3: Only have a limited space amount. Like it's very we're

2041
01:34:38,720 --> 01:34:40,720
Speaker 3: close to the date. Some people dropped out, so we

2042
01:34:40,760 --> 01:34:43,639
Speaker 3: have a couple of spots left. But I wouldn't hesitate,

2043
01:34:43,680 --> 01:34:46,599
Speaker 3: I wouldn't procrastinate. Let this be a sign and let

2044
01:34:46,600 --> 01:34:50,360
Speaker 3: your intuition lead you on vacation with us.

2045
01:34:50,960 --> 01:34:51,439
Speaker 6: Kings.

2046
01:34:51,479 --> 01:34:55,840
Speaker 10: Please open up your minds and your first eye because

2047
01:34:55,880 --> 01:34:58,799
Speaker 10: we need this, We need these opportunities to hold space

2048
01:34:58,840 --> 01:35:01,120
Speaker 10: for the new versions of ourselves. It's going to be

2049
01:35:01,160 --> 01:35:03,200
Speaker 10: a safe space to be whoever you want to be,

2050
01:35:03,640 --> 01:35:05,280
Speaker 10: for your partner to be whoever you want to be.

2051
01:35:05,560 --> 01:35:08,080
Speaker 10: I think that's very important that we hold space for

2052
01:35:08,120 --> 01:35:10,920
Speaker 10: the new versions of each other because we keep going together,

2053
01:35:10,960 --> 01:35:12,920
Speaker 10: we keep learning these new tools, and we just keep

2054
01:35:12,920 --> 01:35:14,160
Speaker 10: on moving forward together.

2055
01:35:14,240 --> 01:35:16,760
Speaker 6: So please invest in this.

2056
01:35:16,960 --> 01:35:18,920
Speaker 10: It's going to be that memory that you look back

2057
01:35:18,960 --> 01:35:20,720
Speaker 10: on and say, man, remember when we was doing the

2058
01:35:20,760 --> 01:35:23,960
Speaker 10: bread stuff in the jungle naked? Oh shoot, maybe we

2059
01:35:24,080 --> 01:35:28,880
Speaker 10: not naked, Maybe we just chilling. But enjoy that, you know.

2060
01:35:29,040 --> 01:35:31,080
Speaker 10: Just invest that in yourselves, invest that in your play

2061
01:35:31,120 --> 01:35:32,799
Speaker 10: and your enjoyment and in your household.

2062
01:35:33,160 --> 01:35:35,800
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's got a little affirmation right there. Leave space

2063
01:35:35,840 --> 01:35:38,320
Speaker 5: for the you part of yourself is.

2064
01:35:39,040 --> 01:35:42,679
Speaker 3: That the affirmation. Leave space for the new version of yourself,

2065
01:35:44,280 --> 01:35:45,360
Speaker 3: Leave space.

2066
01:35:45,040 --> 01:35:47,640
Speaker 6: For the open space. How about hold space.

2067
01:35:47,400 --> 01:35:49,080
Speaker 9: For the new version of Hold space for the new

2068
01:35:49,200 --> 01:35:50,080
Speaker 9: versions of yourself.

2069
01:35:50,320 --> 01:35:52,920
Speaker 1: Because these are couples.

2070
01:35:52,760 --> 01:35:54,400
Speaker 10: You might want to get to the jungle and want

2071
01:35:54,400 --> 01:35:57,320
Speaker 10: to do some ninja shit with me, And she can't

2072
01:35:57,360 --> 01:35:59,840
Speaker 10: be judging you for now. If my nigga wants to

2073
01:35:59,840 --> 01:36:02,880
Speaker 10: be eat barefoot with a bow staff underneath these trees,

2074
01:36:03,320 --> 01:36:04,959
Speaker 10: you got to say, because Kim.

2075
01:36:04,760 --> 01:36:07,800
Speaker 2: Will definitely be barefoot under a tree with a bow

2076
01:36:07,840 --> 01:36:11,320
Speaker 2: staff at the retreat, probably with knives and any other

2077
01:36:11,560 --> 01:36:13,760
Speaker 2: weapon he forms finds out there.

2078
01:36:13,920 --> 01:36:18,400
Speaker 10: And here, I want you there with me. I won't

2079
01:36:18,439 --> 01:36:22,639
Speaker 10: be naked at that time. And yes, yes, hold space

2080
01:36:22,680 --> 01:36:24,320
Speaker 10: for all these new innerversions of each other.

2081
01:36:24,439 --> 01:36:28,280
Speaker 3: Yes, yes, thank you guys for joining us.

2082
01:36:29,120 --> 01:36:29,799
Speaker 9: This was fun.

2083
01:36:29,960 --> 01:36:30,800
Speaker 6: Thank you for having us.

2084
01:36:30,840 --> 01:36:34,120
Speaker 10: I get to be in this special place, wrought out

2085
01:36:34,200 --> 01:36:35,080
Speaker 10: so many good memories.

2086
01:36:35,240 --> 01:36:37,240
Speaker 2: This is a sacred place, Yes, I think in that

2087
01:36:37,280 --> 01:36:39,360
Speaker 2: I think that's why I was nervous, because this has

2088
01:36:39,400 --> 01:36:43,200
Speaker 2: been such a sacred space and for me and Jamila,

2089
01:36:43,360 --> 01:36:46,000
Speaker 2: and I'm so grateful to share this with such a

2090
01:36:46,120 --> 01:36:51,880
Speaker 2: sacred lover and love and yeah, and this, this beautiful

2091
01:36:52,240 --> 01:36:55,519
Speaker 2: energy and entity that we've created all all our own

2092
01:36:56,120 --> 01:36:59,599
Speaker 2: and so being able to share it with my tribe

2093
01:37:00,360 --> 01:37:03,679
Speaker 2: is making me a little nervous.

2094
01:37:03,720 --> 01:37:05,519
Speaker 7: Sharika, but I did it.

2095
01:37:06,720 --> 01:37:13,639
Speaker 3: No, it's not Ska, Yes, Shamira that's really powerful.

2096
01:37:15,360 --> 01:37:20,520
Speaker 9: It's really powerful. Tell the people where they can find you.

2097
01:37:20,439 --> 01:37:25,840
Speaker 10: You can find me under Sha Kim Howees. Oh, I'll

2098
01:37:25,840 --> 01:37:27,760
Speaker 10: do it right now, but I might cause dogs to bark.

2099
01:37:28,680 --> 01:37:30,240
Speaker 1: He does do that and dogs are parking.

2100
01:37:32,640 --> 01:37:33,760
Speaker 9: That's true.

2101
01:37:34,840 --> 01:37:38,760
Speaker 7: You can find this Big Dick Babbage at w H Underscore.

2102
01:37:38,479 --> 01:37:42,479
Speaker 3: Orlando roy Or on our other podcast that we have together, love.

2103
01:37:42,400 --> 01:37:47,639
Speaker 5: Like this in our relationship Instagram Hucci Mom and Dad.

2104
01:37:47,720 --> 01:37:51,200
Speaker 7: Oh yeah, the best Instagram name on the planet.

2105
01:37:52,920 --> 01:37:54,320
Speaker 9: Thank you guys for joining us.

2106
01:37:54,680 --> 01:37:56,840
Speaker 3: If you're watching this and you're in Atlanta, we're going

2107
01:37:56,840 --> 01:37:59,599
Speaker 3: to be in Atlanta April twenty six. If you're in Charlotte,

2108
01:37:59,600 --> 01:38:02,639
Speaker 3: we're gonna be and Charlotte May second with Mom Juice. Also,

2109
01:38:02,640 --> 01:38:06,400
Speaker 3: we're gonna be in Atlanta with Black Effect Podcast Festival.

2110
01:38:06,439 --> 01:38:08,400
Speaker 3: We're gonna have a special guest. We're gonna turn up.

2111
01:38:08,439 --> 01:38:11,240
Speaker 3: It's a whole festival of the podcast. A podcast is

2112
01:38:11,240 --> 01:38:14,080
Speaker 3: really gonna be I've never been to one. Excited me too.

2113
01:38:14,120 --> 01:38:16,479
Speaker 3: I'm excited a lot of talking people. You know, we're

2114
01:38:16,479 --> 01:38:18,960
Speaker 3: gonna come with some heat, some surprises. Yeah, we have

2115
01:38:19,040 --> 01:38:21,479
Speaker 3: some good surprises for you guys. And then we're gonna

2116
01:38:21,520 --> 01:38:24,439
Speaker 3: go to Charlotte May second and hang out with Mom Juice,

2117
01:38:24,520 --> 01:38:25,680
Speaker 3: So check that out too.

2118
01:38:26,040 --> 01:38:27,759
Speaker 9: You know we on touring shit, so.

2119
01:38:27,760 --> 01:38:30,720
Speaker 2: We have all the links in this episode description, so

2120
01:38:31,240 --> 01:38:34,040
Speaker 2: come pull up, come join the couple's retreat. Make sure

2121
01:38:34,080 --> 01:38:36,000
Speaker 2: you click the link in this episode description to get

2122
01:38:36,040 --> 01:38:41,320
Speaker 2: the discount code, which is pleasure. Say again pleasure, Oh

2123
01:38:41,479 --> 01:38:45,240
Speaker 2: use pleasure, and I promise you have a pleasure experience.

2124
01:38:45,280 --> 01:38:47,400
Speaker 1: We can see all those dollars drop off the amount.

2125
01:38:50,600 --> 01:38:53,519
Speaker 9: Yeah, I have a beautiful day and love you.

2126
01:38:55,920 --> 01:38:57,760
Speaker 11: Yeah, Gona been so good.

2127
01:38:57,800 --> 01:38:58,439
Speaker 7: Can't you tell?

2128
01:38:58,720 --> 01:39:01,240
Speaker 11: I went through routs until I found out Well, may

2129
01:39:01,360 --> 01:39:03,320
Speaker 11: might have been known earth. I used to be broken

2130
01:39:03,479 --> 01:39:06,240
Speaker 11: hell now got the blues in to like Beyonce Jasell

2131
01:39:06,600 --> 01:39:09,880
Speaker 11: throat shot or popping his cow wearing our voices. Patriarchy

2132
01:39:10,000 --> 01:39:12,400
Speaker 11: kept it in the box to exploit its women put

2133
01:39:12,400 --> 01:39:14,280
Speaker 11: the pe in power, so it's pointless.

2134
01:39:14,320 --> 01:39:17,360
Speaker 1: They want me to be good, So I mean bad choices.

2135
01:39:17,080 --> 01:39:19,559
Speaker 11: Bad mom, not a bad mom, but a bad mom.

2136
01:39:19,680 --> 01:39:22,639
Speaker 11: It He's in on the cannabis in ther backbone, walked

2137
01:39:22,640 --> 01:39:25,479
Speaker 11: in bosss cap and I blew his cat bolls hot dog.

2138
01:39:25,600 --> 01:39:27,320
Speaker 1: Now I'm immune to the cat.

2139
01:39:27,160 --> 01:39:29,439
Speaker 11: Called her being a waisted straight to it like a

2140
01:39:29,479 --> 01:39:31,760
Speaker 11: dollar sign. Mother, rent the lover when too. It is

2141
01:39:31,840 --> 01:39:32,799
Speaker 11: like a water sign.

2142
01:39:32,680 --> 01:39:34,599
Speaker 1: Where you're rent the winter essential will when.

2143
01:39:34,520 --> 01:39:36,160
Speaker 7: The summer time. I do it all.

2144
01:39:36,240 --> 01:39:37,760
Speaker 1: Ain't know when that needs to run it by