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Speaker 1: The Nicky Glazer Podcast. Lazer, here's Nikki. Hello, here I am,

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Speaker 1: It's Nicky Glazer. It's the Nicki Glazer Podcast. It's Thursday.

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Speaker 1: We are doing a special episode. We've got Andrew here,

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Speaker 1: We've got Noah, and we have Aria Tomay from yesterday's episode.

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Speaker 1: If you didn't hear it yet. She is my friend

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Speaker 1: and vocal coach and sound personal sound healer UM and

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Speaker 1: she is. She talked about her um, her life as

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Speaker 1: a transgendered woman yesterday on the pod and it was

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Speaker 1: so good. Thank you. We're getting so much good feedback

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Speaker 1: even though it hasn't aired yet because I'm talking about this,

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Speaker 1: but I'm guaranteeing you we are to say how therapeutic

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Speaker 1: it was on the podcast. Yes, it feels good just

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Speaker 1: to answer you like to get up to get it out.

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Speaker 1: It was so nice. I love talking to you about

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Speaker 1: this stuff. It's the best. So thank you for sharing

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Speaker 1: that with us today on the podcast. We're just gonna

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Speaker 1: do a whole episode of our listeners voicemails because we've

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Speaker 1: got a ton and we got to get through them. Um.

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Speaker 1: These are our besties that have uh you know, sending

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Speaker 1: voice messages to the show. It's time for an all

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Speaker 1: fan Trax episode. All right, here we go that we

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Speaker 1: call a fan than because antrax is what they say

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Speaker 1: in the mail, and we said that people would like,

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Speaker 1: I don't know how we got into it, but are

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Speaker 1: hands alright, let's get to it. No, what do you

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Speaker 1: got for us? All right? Let's start with Jesse. Uh,

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Speaker 1: this is Jesse. I'm a bestie from the beginning. I

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Speaker 1: love you guys, Andrew No and Nikki, guys are amazing.

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Speaker 1: And this is for Tom. I was listening to you

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Speaker 1: guys and I heard that fan tracks from Tom talking

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Speaker 1: about how he's older and he's like worried about it. Um, yeah,

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Speaker 1: my boy friend is like thirteen years older than me.

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Speaker 1: He's forty seven. And uh, just a little bit ago,

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Speaker 1: he went on a trip and he was flying on

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Speaker 1: the point and the guy he sat next to they

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Speaker 1: just started talking. They were the same age, and uh,

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Speaker 1: he was like, yeah, I'm listening to Nicky Glazier and

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Speaker 1: the other guy was like, I'm a bestie. So they

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Speaker 1: like sat there and bonded over being besties of Nikki's

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Speaker 1: and they're both like late so you never know. Anyways,

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Speaker 1: I love you guys. Love the pod have all the swells,

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Speaker 1: don't become jackpot Jesse to our demos are dying, you know,

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Speaker 1: all their fans are gonna be dead, and like five

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Speaker 1: years we had a good run, right right, That's so sweet.

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Speaker 1: My parents are always miffed that I have older men

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Speaker 1: that like me or like my manager agents. Whenever they

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Speaker 1: come to shows, they're like, there's so many older people

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Speaker 1: at the show. And I take it as such a

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Speaker 1: compliment that because I always associate, you know, age with wisdom.

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Speaker 1: So I'm always like flattered when older people listen to

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Speaker 1: the show and to me, forty seven is not like

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Speaker 1: to me. But I did like that Jesse's eating a

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Speaker 1: guy thirteen years older than her. Yeah, that did that

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Speaker 1: make you feel? Seen her? Yeah? I mean look, you

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Speaker 1: know when when you just get really hot and wisdom,

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Speaker 1: you know, everyone says that wisdom about me, wisdom, My

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Speaker 1: wisdom teeth are wisdom. Yeah, that is like to have

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Speaker 1: something in common. Like when remember when the bestie wrote

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Speaker 1: in tom I guess it was, and said he's an

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Speaker 1: older bestie and he was like, what do we call ourselves?

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Speaker 1: And you said a diabestie like diabetes and then yes,

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Speaker 1: because it's ridiculous, almost like analyze, which is what you

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Speaker 1: want me to call my special anal line. Thank you

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Speaker 1: because it's talk I'm analyzing, but also because I was, like,

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Speaker 1: I see the world. Okay, No, Aria, do not embrace it.

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Speaker 1: It's not correct. It's a guy. It's not good. But

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Speaker 1: anyone diabetes, why would you have to If you have

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Speaker 1: to convince something something's bad, then it's probably pretty genius,

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Speaker 1: you know what I mean? Some wisdom that a woman

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Speaker 1: sixteen years younger and his forties who's a fan of

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Speaker 1: Nikki Glazer, I understand. But someone I had posted on

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Speaker 1: our Instagram someone wrote that a good name for older

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Speaker 1: besties is rusties, and I felt that was really funny. Better.

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Speaker 1: But I love when besties like run into each other

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Speaker 1: and like, no, each like connect with each other. I

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Speaker 1: gotta say, like, it's so funny over the weekend. There

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Speaker 1: is a part of me that wants to maybe get

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Speaker 1: recognized once over a weekend when I'm with my boyfriend

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Speaker 1: and his brother and his friend and like, you're wearing

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Speaker 1: your own merch. I did bring it with me, but

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Speaker 1: I didn't wear it. There's a part of me that's

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Speaker 1: like one person would be nice. I didn't get recognized

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Speaker 1: all weekend, and I was around a lot of people,

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Speaker 1: and I felt like, Malon, don't you gotta go out

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Speaker 1: in St. Louis more with your boyfriend because I get

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Speaker 1: recognized definitely, But I don't get recognized here either. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. So it's it's miraculous to me that two

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Speaker 1: people who know who I am would ever sit next

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Speaker 1: to each other on a plane. I don't know that

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Speaker 1: I'm famous. You get a shitty tattoo that says puddles

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Speaker 1: or jack. I think you're more people think you're more approachable.

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Speaker 1: I have to because I think people do recognize me,

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Speaker 1: they just don't come up to me. They don't say it.

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Speaker 1: But I don't know why. I don't. Maybe, but I

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Speaker 1: feel like I am approachable, but maybe I'm not. I

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Speaker 1: don't know. It is pretty cool to get noticed in

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Speaker 1: front of Oh, it's the best. It's such valid and yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's we're going. I was going up to escalator and

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Speaker 1: this couple was going down and I can see the

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Speaker 1: guy going and uh, I go to brand they know,

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Speaker 1: and she's like, yeah, okay, and she turns around there

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Speaker 1: like they just walked back into the store to look

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Speaker 1: at you and whatever. I think they thought I stole something,

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Speaker 1: but whatever, it's fine. That never happens to me. I'm

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Speaker 1: not kidding you, it never does. What's going to happen?

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Speaker 1: You know. What happened to me and Chris was we

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Speaker 1: were in we were waiting in the waiting room for

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Speaker 1: couples therapy and there was a girl next to us

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Speaker 1: who heard us kind of like chatting as we were

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Speaker 1: waiting for our therapist to bring us in. And this

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Speaker 1: girl's kind of and she goes, I'm sorry, are you

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Speaker 1: are you Chris from the Morning to the Courtney Show?

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Speaker 1: And I almost said yes, you know as she says

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Speaker 1: and uh. And I was delighted though, because it was

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Speaker 1: so that's so not what happens to us. Ever, it

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Speaker 1: was great and um, and he was like, yeah, she's

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Speaker 1: nicky laser to like he tried to throw. She just

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Speaker 1: did not care at all. She had such a crush

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Speaker 1: on him and was so excited. It was exciting for

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Speaker 1: me because I liked it because I don't. I don't.

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Speaker 1: It does not make me. I wanted it more for

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Speaker 1: like Chris's friend and brother. I don't it was before,

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Speaker 1: but um, but I don't need like it doesn't make

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Speaker 1: me feel different when if I'm with Chris, I don't

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Speaker 1: care if people like it made me it actually like

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Speaker 1: was funnier that it wasn't for me, but um, but yeah,

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Speaker 1: I would like to have it happen more often. I

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Speaker 1: would implore anyone who sees famous people to go up

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Speaker 1: to them and say, love your work, because famous people

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Speaker 1: that's why they become famous. They want people to like them.

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Speaker 1: Don't be annoying about it. But like if someone's a

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Speaker 1: dick to you, then then you'll have a story about

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Speaker 1: that why that actor is a dick or whatever. But generally, please,

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Speaker 1: just if you see us, call us out, because that's

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Speaker 1: all we do this for, is for strangers to love us.

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Speaker 1: That just happened to um Keanu Reeves, did you read

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Speaker 1: that's worry? He was at an airport, he was flying

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Speaker 1: back from Europe. At the airport, like someone recognized him

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Speaker 1: and just kept asking questions like where were you in Europe?

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Speaker 1: What did you eat? Like just asking like very generic

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Speaker 1: questions over like just like one after the other, and

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Speaker 1: then and Keiana was like very gracious about an answer

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Speaker 1: it and then he like famously kind Yeah, he like

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Speaker 1: asked the kid where did you go in Europe? What

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Speaker 1: did you like about it? Cute? What was What was

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Speaker 1: it like working with Sandra Bulk for you? Yeah, the

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Speaker 1: kids like I can't Yeah, your kids like you don't

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Speaker 1: recognize me from Big Daddy Will the Matrix four. The

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Speaker 1: best I get is going grocery shopping and seeing someone

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Speaker 1: from church there and be like, I hated that him.

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Speaker 1: You played. No, they don't say that. It's happened before

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Speaker 1: they said I hated that him. You played. When it's

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Speaker 1: on this small scale, like teacher at the grocery store

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Speaker 1: when you're kids, God, because you see them out in

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Speaker 1: the world, like, oh my god, they grocery shop. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: they breathe outside, you know, mean girls Tina faces. It's

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Speaker 1: like seeing a dog walk into hind legs. When you

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Speaker 1: see a teacher like at the shopping like at the mall,

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Speaker 1: or when you see one at a party after you

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Speaker 1: graduate and they're banging a girl. That happened. Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: I was the age of screpancy, probably less than you

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Speaker 1: and Brenna between those two, but yeah, judge him first

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Speaker 1: of all, it's completely different. He taught her and and

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Speaker 1: Brenna teaches you. Yes, we all learned she's awesome. She's so,

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Speaker 1: she's like she's younger than us, but you never feel it.

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Speaker 1: You only see yeah, you only like notice. It is

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Speaker 1: just a number that people probably notice when they see

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Speaker 1: us together. Age is just just a number that makes you,

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Speaker 1: defines everything about you and reminds you that you're close

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Speaker 1: to the grave than other people and that you are

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Speaker 1: worth less. That's all it is. That's all this, that's

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Speaker 1: all will be okay, nex Yeah, okay. I get younger. Actually,

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Speaker 1: you get younger, younger and more attracted to Um. That's interesting.

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Speaker 1: Do you get younger or do you prefer young Like

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Speaker 1: what do you and when we're talking younger, we're talking

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Speaker 1: with the right. Um. No, I'm usually attracted to older people. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: but younger people are more attracted to you kind of yes, yes,

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Speaker 1: I have that too, where it's like younger there's younger

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Speaker 1: guys that go like teach me, mommy like kind of

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Speaker 1: things like I could I want to learn from me?

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Speaker 1: And I'm like, honestly, you would have to teach me

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Speaker 1: something like don't you I'm coming with no experience. I

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Speaker 1: just lay there. That has been my m O for you.

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Speaker 1: I'm not going to teach You're like, whoa this woman?

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Speaker 1: She taught me so much. She taught me how to

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Speaker 1: be lazy and just lay and take it like I've

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Speaker 1: never seen teach you how to write a five play

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Speaker 1: rough essay. But in terms of sexual like performance, I

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Speaker 1: have no tips. Um, all right, let's get to the

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Speaker 1: next pand reck. Okay, let's you a quick one from Mandy. Hey, Nicky, Andrew,

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Speaker 1: and Noah. My name is Mandy. I've been binging the

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Speaker 1: podcast since episode one and I caught up just in

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Speaker 1: time for you guys to take a week off. But

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Speaker 1: that's okay, you guys deserve a break. Um. I've also

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Speaker 1: been listening to Andrew's podcast from the beginning, so I've

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Speaker 1: had that to catch up on this week. Um, I've

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Speaker 1: got a few things to tell you, so I'll talk fast.

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Speaker 1: Speaking of talking fast, you guys wondered if any besties

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Speaker 1: listened to the pod um faster than normal speed, And yes,

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Speaker 1: I listened to all of my podcasts at one point

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Speaker 1: three time speed one. Next, I've been a vegetarian for

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Speaker 1: six years, and Nikki, I want you to know that

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Speaker 1: you were the reason I finally changed. For years, I

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Speaker 1: made excuses and I just ate last meet until one

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Speaker 1: night I was watching your I G stories and you

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Speaker 1: posted a video of a cow playing with the beach

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Speaker 1: ball and you said cows are just as intelligent and

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Speaker 1: playful as dogs. This one is not special. And that

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Speaker 1: was the final push I needed to fully commit. So

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Speaker 1: now I'm trying to be vegan, but keep talking about it.

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Speaker 1: Spread the message. I want you you know that your

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Speaker 1: words do reach people. Um. And last thing, I was

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Speaker 1: so excited to hear you talk about bed jet. I've

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Speaker 1: never met anyone else who had one. Um, I get.

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Speaker 1: I don't care. It's life. Seriously, if anyone out there

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Speaker 1: suffers from terrible night sweats like I did, get a

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Speaker 1: bed jet, I know, my God, but it's worth it.

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Speaker 1: It is tried. Last night. Sorry okay to and love

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Speaker 1: you all. Jet fruit. Um. Okay, that bed jet is

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Speaker 1: an air conditioning system for your bed. So last night

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Speaker 1: my room was so hot. I go I gotta do it.

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Speaker 1: In the voice of the girl the bestie that said, hey,

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Speaker 1: you need to set this up and give us a

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Speaker 1: review within my line, open Ali, I opened it up.

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Speaker 1: I get all the parts out, and I opened the

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Speaker 1: manual to set it up, and I goop. This is

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Speaker 1: why I have a boyfriend when I am not doing

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Speaker 1: this so many it is a big book. It is

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Speaker 1: so confusing. Um, who is the bestie that we just

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Speaker 1: what was her name? That man to talk to? Mandy?

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Speaker 1: Her from Mandy. Um. I wonder, Mandy, if you set

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Speaker 1: yours up yourself. I know that I could. But last

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Speaker 1: night I had a headache and I was just like,

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Speaker 1: I would rather just sweat tonight, and I put um.

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Speaker 1: You know, sometimes when I get botox or injections or

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Speaker 1: like any kind of facial work done, they give me

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Speaker 1: these ice packs for my face so the swelling goes down.

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Speaker 1: And so I pulled those out and like put them

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Speaker 1: all over my face and that was how I stayed cool.

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Speaker 1: But is in my room now the box the task

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Speaker 1: grabbit because I don't want to have to talk to

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Speaker 1: a guy. The last time I had a task grabbit,

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Speaker 1: he was very annoying. He hung my shelves all wrong.

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Speaker 1: So I'm gonna have Chris do it. Chris would love

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Speaker 1: to do it. You know, when when is that gonna happen?

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Speaker 1: Probably when I'm at a town will come over and

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Speaker 1: set it up, but I definitely or maybe tonight because

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Speaker 1: I bled all over my sheets last night period. Um,

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Speaker 1: so I do have to change my sheets. And I

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Speaker 1: got a bed jet sheet which has like it's an

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Speaker 1: ad on cost. So I paid next or hundred dollars

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Speaker 1: for these special sheets that have like vents in them

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Speaker 1: that you hooked the vent up to that' no, no, no,

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Speaker 1: I didn't those I bled on these other ones. It

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Speaker 1: looks like I lost my virginity, but I didn't. I

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Speaker 1: just took a tamp on out because I was masturbating

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Speaker 1: and I forgot to put one back in. And it's

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Speaker 1: I was thinking about today when people say about because

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Speaker 1: I was like dealing with like that's so funny that

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Speaker 1: women like if if you don't do something like you

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Speaker 1: will bleed everywhere. Yeah, Like it's just why I had

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Speaker 1: a tamp on. And when I was masturbating, by the way,

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Speaker 1: and I have like a thing that I put up.

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Speaker 1: There wasn't my fingers, but I was like, God, why

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Speaker 1: I won't to go up? And then I was like oh,

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Speaker 1: and so I take it out and I was like

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Speaker 1: where do I put this? Because I'm like in bed,

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Speaker 1: I just like set it on. I was laying on

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Speaker 1: a towel already because I knew I was on my period,

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Speaker 1: but I forgot about so I put down a towel

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Speaker 1: just because I and then I put it, I wrapped

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Speaker 1: it up. This is so disgusting. I shouldn't share this,

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Speaker 1: but I wrapped my tamp on up in the towel

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Speaker 1: so that I could just like have my session and

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Speaker 1: not be interrupted by like going to the bathroom, you know.

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Speaker 1: And then I fell asleep, and then this more come

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Speaker 1: to my plight, and luckily was dried by then, so

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Speaker 1: it didn't stay my carpet, but it was like it

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Speaker 1: was a mess. I'm so glad I didn't dine in

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Speaker 1: my sleep lest night, because you would. I mean, anyone

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Speaker 1: who found me in this like tea yesterday, it was.

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Speaker 1: It was a nightmare. But I'm just saying that for

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Speaker 1: any gross girls out there that might think your gross.

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Speaker 1: So am, I let's take a break and come back

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Speaker 1: with more fantas after this. Andrew here comes everybody. It

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Speaker 1: is everyone really there. I don't know any more. Baby,

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Speaker 1: just comb my hair. We're back. Um, we're here with Andrew, Me, Noah,

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Speaker 1: and Aria Tomay who you can um if you're in

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Speaker 1: the St. Louis area, or if through zoom you want

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Speaker 1: to do some voice lessons or UM. If you're A,

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Speaker 1: if you're transitioning and we're gonna work on your voice

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Speaker 1: se voice voice feminization, you can look her up at

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Speaker 1: Aria uh sound one dot com that she also does

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Speaker 1: sound you do sound feeling through zoom zoom. But if

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Speaker 1: you're A, yeah, stop by Aria sound one a wait

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Speaker 1: dot com and maybe you'll cross paths with me as

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Speaker 1: I'm leaving her place or have a question for t

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Speaker 1: say hi and take a sure with me. I have

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Speaker 1: a quick question. So when you're doing the R readings,

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Speaker 1: are you able to see people's auras or like? How

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Speaker 1: like how do you read the colors? Yes? How do

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Speaker 1: I read the color? Yeah? I don't read the colors?

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Speaker 1: I do. I don't read the color. I use the

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Speaker 1: sound to interpret the color. So like, so like your

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Speaker 1: aura um has energy in in it, right um. So

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Speaker 1: if you have like an unprocessed memory or something or

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Speaker 1: a pattern of thinking, that um isn't best for your

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Speaker 1: highest self. Like it can manifest itself in your aura

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Speaker 1: as stuck energy. So if I run a tuning fork

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Speaker 1: through your aura um, the tuning fork will literally it

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Speaker 1: sound different where that spot is. So just like you

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Speaker 1: tease out hair, you know, like this you tease out

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Speaker 1: the energy. Um. And so a lot of clients that

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Speaker 1: I've had, UM, after they leave a session, they'll tell

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Speaker 1: me in the next couple of days that they just

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Speaker 1: they've had this flood of like childhood memories um that

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Speaker 1: they haven't that they have yet. So I have five

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Speaker 1: active lawsuits right now, but they'll have this flat of

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Speaker 1: memories of things that they haven't processed yet, and so

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Speaker 1: it helps them the process memories. UM. So a sound

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Speaker 1: tingeing can be like, you know, these sounds so nice,

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Speaker 1: but there's also an aspect of like, I have my

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Speaker 1: ship to do with, you know, to them if you

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Speaker 1: if you do them, yeah, there's there's there's clean up there,

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Speaker 1: like yeah, it's gonna bring up stuff that you're gonna

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Speaker 1: have to deal with. I hope you're ready. Yeah, um,

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00:18:03,200 --> 00:18:08,520
Speaker 1: great question not yeah, thank you? UM. Next fan trax. Okay,

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Speaker 1: here's one from Sarah. Hey, bessies, this is Sarah calling

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Speaker 1: from Atlanta and I love you guys. But the main

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Speaker 1: reason I'm calling today is because recently y'all were talking

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Speaker 1: about song lyrics and just like misshearing things and stuff

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Speaker 1: like that. So I was hanging out with my best

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Speaker 1: friend and her husband, and we discovered that he thought

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Speaker 1: the song Black Widow by Iggy Azalea, instead of throughout

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Speaker 1: it saying I'm a black widow baby, he thought it

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Speaker 1: was saying I'm a whitlack whittle baby widow baby. He

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Speaker 1: thought this white woman was sinking a song and saying,

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Speaker 1: I mean that's what people have accused of, whittle baby,

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Speaker 1: like like a little baby, I'm a black thinking about it.

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Speaker 1: It is just I think it's so funny, and I

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00:19:06,119 --> 00:19:09,639
Speaker 1: thought that as besties, y'all would think it was funny

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00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:13,080
Speaker 1: as well. So I wanted to share with you guys. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so jud jacked up on Mountain dew Wait. Black widow baby,

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Speaker 1: Black black widow baby. It's so funny, and it is

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Speaker 1: what people accuse Igazalia of doing is like being trying

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Speaker 1: to be a black woman in the way that she

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00:19:31,680 --> 00:19:35,040
Speaker 1: speaks inappropriating, and black widow is like so dark and

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Speaker 1: like badass, like you kill the guy you fuck black. No,

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00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:43,920
Speaker 1: that's yeah, and that's a brain mantive. Black widows killed

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Speaker 1: the whole thing. Really, I feel like they just have

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Speaker 1: like a hour glass on their backs and then they

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Speaker 1: kill whatever man's toe they bite. I thought I just

353
00:19:53,920 --> 00:19:56,760
Speaker 1: killed the kill. Do they maybe they do eat there?

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Speaker 1: But I ain't wait black widow baby, I'm just saying that,

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Speaker 1: how different a black widow? Yeah, like what she's trying

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Speaker 1: to say? Black the thing where you go? Why the

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00:20:10,560 --> 00:20:13,240
Speaker 1: how do if you thought that was the title? Don't

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Speaker 1: you think there's something wrong with that? Like? What? Don't

359
00:20:15,600 --> 00:20:19,040
Speaker 1: you know what's going on? You're like, That's what always

360
00:20:19,040 --> 00:20:22,520
Speaker 1: gets me is mispronunciations or missing when people miss here

361
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Speaker 1: something like but you went your life thinking that that

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Speaker 1: was a thing and you didn't go. Isn't it weird

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00:20:27,840 --> 00:20:31,760
Speaker 1: that she says black black widow baby, you just accepted

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Speaker 1: that that's where I go. Something's wrong with you, not

365
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Speaker 1: that you heard it wrong, but why do you think

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Speaker 1: that that's okay? Or that that's about the thing that

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00:20:39,240 --> 00:20:41,560
Speaker 1: would make you look a little further and go, maybe

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Speaker 1: I'm hearing this wrong. Yeah, I'm just trying to think

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Speaker 1: of like you with like um pudding, what is it

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Speaker 1: off putting? And if something he thought that instead of

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00:20:51,920 --> 00:20:55,880
Speaker 1: something's off putting, he thought it was, Oh they're off putting, Like, oh,

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00:20:56,520 --> 00:20:59,440
Speaker 1: they they're not off They're not eating putting right now,

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Speaker 1: so they're Uh, there you don't want to be around them?

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Speaker 1: How happy are you when you Is that really the

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00:21:06,320 --> 00:21:08,919
Speaker 1: logic that you bestow now that I think about I

376
00:21:08,960 --> 00:21:12,080
Speaker 1: never really overthought it. Well we know that that's the thing.

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00:21:12,160 --> 00:21:14,280
Speaker 1: Is like I always go, wait, why didn't you think

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00:21:14,320 --> 00:21:16,359
Speaker 1: the next step? But there's some people that just don't

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Speaker 1: do the next step. And that's also why you don't

380
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Speaker 1: want to kill yourself because I always go my A

381
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Speaker 1: D D. I get depressed from my A D because

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00:21:24,119 --> 00:21:25,880
Speaker 1: I spin to the next thought and the next time

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00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:27,159
Speaker 1: and the next tip. Well then why is that? Well

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00:21:27,200 --> 00:21:31,040
Speaker 1: then why is that? Like Chris, Chris is pointing out

385
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Speaker 1: this thing I do often, which is like why the

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Speaker 1: first time like we noticed that I do it all

387
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:40,560
Speaker 1: the time? Is I saw a Chevy Malibu And I

388
00:21:40,880 --> 00:21:43,359
Speaker 1: even asked Noah this, I was like, why would someone

389
00:21:43,520 --> 00:21:48,439
Speaker 1: buy a Chevy Malibu when something when like a camera

390
00:21:48,760 --> 00:21:53,560
Speaker 1: or something equal? Uh the equal cost is Kelly Blue

391
00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:57,439
Speaker 1: Book like so much better? Like why spend the same

392
00:21:57,480 --> 00:22:00,439
Speaker 1: amount of money for something that everything says is worse?

393
00:22:01,440 --> 00:22:04,480
Speaker 1: And he says, and that's why I don't That's where

394
00:22:04,480 --> 00:22:07,440
Speaker 1: I go. What's like why I don't get it? Why

395
00:22:07,440 --> 00:22:10,800
Speaker 1: does that thing exist. Why does this shirt exist that

396
00:22:10,960 --> 00:22:14,359
Speaker 1: has that is ugly? Why does that? Why do people

397
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:18,520
Speaker 1: want things that are inferior quality? When I just don't

398
00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:20,760
Speaker 1: get it? And that really bugs me and it makes

399
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Speaker 1: me like feel disconnected from the world in this way

400
00:22:23,359 --> 00:22:25,520
Speaker 1: that I kind of like, if I follow that thought,

401
00:22:25,560 --> 00:22:28,160
Speaker 1: I'm like, I just want out, like you know, turns

402
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,240
Speaker 1: into like suicidal thoughts of like, but how does the

403
00:22:30,280 --> 00:22:33,600
Speaker 1: Malibu get to be? Because it's because I don't understand

404
00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:37,960
Speaker 1: my fellow human and I just I lose. I'm so different.

405
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:40,760
Speaker 1: I feel different. I feel like I will never be

406
00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:43,360
Speaker 1: like everyone else, and I almost want to be, like

407
00:22:43,760 --> 00:22:46,119
Speaker 1: get a Chevy Malibu when a Honda would be a

408
00:22:46,119 --> 00:22:50,600
Speaker 1: better car. Again, they probably do it because people want

409
00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:53,040
Speaker 1: to buy American maid and that's why. And that's a

410
00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:57,800
Speaker 1: whole another thing that didn't I think like Hamdrip go

411
00:22:59,160 --> 00:23:03,400
Speaker 1: Nissan Ultima. Going back to yesterday's episode, like I want

412
00:23:03,400 --> 00:23:05,240
Speaker 1: to see if this is gonna work, where we said

413
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Speaker 1: that as adults we looked to complete our childhood. You

414
00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:11,000
Speaker 1: said that your therapist introduce you to that concept and stuff.

415
00:23:11,480 --> 00:23:14,840
Speaker 1: Were you one of those kids that would ask why why?

416
00:23:15,200 --> 00:23:18,400
Speaker 1: Like for every like everything you see? Yes, and did

417
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:22,800
Speaker 1: your parents eventually like suppress that and say, okay, Nikki,

418
00:23:22,840 --> 00:23:25,800
Speaker 1: like stop asking us why why? Why? Well, I would

419
00:23:25,840 --> 00:23:29,479
Speaker 1: ask and to her answer, because my question would always

420
00:23:29,480 --> 00:23:33,719
Speaker 1: be sexual in nature of like why do we like

421
00:23:34,320 --> 00:23:37,720
Speaker 1: why do men like women's big boobs? Like I don't

422
00:23:37,760 --> 00:23:40,439
Speaker 1: get it, Like I want to understand why that? And

423
00:23:40,480 --> 00:23:42,600
Speaker 1: then it would just be such an awkward question that

424
00:23:42,720 --> 00:23:45,080
Speaker 1: no one would say anything, and so I would feel

425
00:23:45,520 --> 00:23:48,120
Speaker 1: weird for even asking. I feel like I'm a bad

426
00:23:48,160 --> 00:23:54,600
Speaker 1: person for asking. I want to That's what, Like I

427
00:23:54,640 --> 00:23:57,719
Speaker 1: didn't say that, but I'm like, I just I And

428
00:23:57,760 --> 00:23:59,760
Speaker 1: that's why I think I'm a comedian because I get

429
00:23:59,800 --> 00:24:02,840
Speaker 1: to now say things that I always wanted to say

430
00:24:02,920 --> 00:24:04,800
Speaker 1: and and call out things that are like why aren't

431
00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:07,800
Speaker 1: we talking about this thing that everyone's thinking about? But

432
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:09,639
Speaker 1: we have to act like we're not. It's just so

433
00:24:09,680 --> 00:24:13,040
Speaker 1: weird to me, and I just get and I think

434
00:24:13,040 --> 00:24:17,720
Speaker 1: you're right now, like I am trying to complete the

435
00:24:17,800 --> 00:24:21,200
Speaker 1: story from my childhood, which is like I'm now making

436
00:24:21,240 --> 00:24:24,639
Speaker 1: money and getting love from people for calling from for

437
00:24:24,960 --> 00:24:29,560
Speaker 1: presenting awkward questions and scenarios. So I'm actually mending that

438
00:24:29,640 --> 00:24:31,800
Speaker 1: wound from my childhood of like you're wrong for what

439
00:24:31,840 --> 00:24:34,080
Speaker 1: you're doing. And now I'm like, see, mom, when I

440
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:36,679
Speaker 1: when I talk about sex, now, people they don't not

441
00:24:36,760 --> 00:24:40,959
Speaker 1: answer me. They actually like applaud me and you know,

442
00:24:41,240 --> 00:24:44,119
Speaker 1: like me more. And so it actually is I did

443
00:24:44,480 --> 00:24:47,080
Speaker 1: tie that one up, like I did answer that one

444
00:24:47,119 --> 00:24:49,399
Speaker 1: for myself a little a little bit. I think in ways.

445
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:51,760
Speaker 1: There's other ways that I didn't, but that's what we're

446
00:24:51,760 --> 00:24:56,200
Speaker 1: trying to do. It's interesting, good good observation. Noah, thank you.

447
00:24:56,680 --> 00:25:04,960
Speaker 1: And on that note, On that note, let's to Michelle Michelle. Hey,

448
00:25:05,040 --> 00:25:09,919
Speaker 1: Nikki Andrew and Noah Michelle here from Kentucky. I wanted

449
00:25:09,960 --> 00:25:13,080
Speaker 1: to just call in because I don't think we all

450
00:25:13,119 --> 00:25:18,400
Speaker 1: fully took the time to grasp Noah's truth bomb about

451
00:25:19,400 --> 00:25:23,000
Speaker 1: being codependent, because I was like Nikki and bought you know,

452
00:25:23,080 --> 00:25:25,879
Speaker 1: like codependency. It's actually not a negative thing to be

453
00:25:25,880 --> 00:25:29,880
Speaker 1: able to depend on someone. But what Noah said just

454
00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:34,320
Speaker 1: blew my mind because that's really what it is, is

455
00:25:34,400 --> 00:25:40,159
Speaker 1: that our happiness stems from their feelings. And I and

456
00:25:40,280 --> 00:25:42,760
Speaker 1: that way with my boyfriend, and I didn't know that

457
00:25:43,240 --> 00:25:46,120
Speaker 1: until Noah said it. So now that I know this,

458
00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:48,520
Speaker 1: I'm trying to figure out what to do about it,

459
00:25:48,560 --> 00:25:51,520
Speaker 1: because like, my moods are just up and down depending

460
00:25:51,520 --> 00:25:55,679
Speaker 1: on this feeling. And I would be happy if he's happy,

461
00:25:55,720 --> 00:25:58,280
Speaker 1: but if he's not doing good, then that's whenever I

462
00:25:58,359 --> 00:26:02,040
Speaker 1: go down an anxious spiral. Um. I've talked with the

463
00:26:02,119 --> 00:26:06,560
Speaker 1: doctor of starting to try medicine for it, but now

464
00:26:06,600 --> 00:26:09,800
Speaker 1: I'm trying to think is it something that I could

465
00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:13,840
Speaker 1: just fix with him on my own with med's without him?

466
00:26:13,880 --> 00:26:16,120
Speaker 1: I don't know. So I would love your roles input

467
00:26:16,680 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 1: thank you for always being there for me, um and

468
00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:26,399
Speaker 1: don't be and jack pot. That's all I could come

469
00:26:26,480 --> 00:26:29,920
Speaker 1: up with it in a way that made it sound original. Actually,

470
00:26:29,960 --> 00:26:31,200
Speaker 1: I was like, oh, that's a new one. Oh wait, no,

471
00:26:31,280 --> 00:26:36,000
Speaker 1: that's the original. Um noah wait, let's let's let's revisit this. Okay,

472
00:26:36,040 --> 00:26:39,080
Speaker 1: So what was your original statement and then what advice

473
00:26:39,119 --> 00:26:42,159
Speaker 1: would you give Michelle to to handle her? Because I

474
00:26:42,280 --> 00:26:45,600
Speaker 1: I relate to Michelle like, if Chris is happy, then

475
00:26:45,640 --> 00:26:49,199
Speaker 1: I'm happy. If he's not, then I feel like I

476
00:26:49,320 --> 00:26:53,440
Speaker 1: have to either change the way I'm operating to either

477
00:26:53,520 --> 00:26:57,680
Speaker 1: make him happy or to make sure I tiptoe around

478
00:26:57,840 --> 00:27:01,720
Speaker 1: not making him feel worse. Like it's completely you know,

479
00:27:01,760 --> 00:27:03,280
Speaker 1: and I think he's the same way with me. We

480
00:27:03,320 --> 00:27:07,760
Speaker 1: are completely um, hijacked by each other's emotions. What do

481
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:11,960
Speaker 1: we do? Okay, So I would like to just first say,

482
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:14,000
Speaker 1: but I went to Bookman's and I got found the

483
00:27:14,000 --> 00:27:16,560
Speaker 1: book Codependent No More, which is going to be my reading.

484
00:27:17,280 --> 00:27:22,160
Speaker 1: And UM, basically what I said is that like a

485
00:27:22,200 --> 00:27:25,600
Speaker 1: big revelation for me was when I learned that codependency

486
00:27:25,720 --> 00:27:30,199
Speaker 1: is not nurturing one another. The true definition is um

487
00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:34,439
Speaker 1: of feeling responsible for someone else's feelings. But I have

488
00:27:34,520 --> 00:27:37,400
Speaker 1: no solution, and I would like to pass this over

489
00:27:37,560 --> 00:27:41,399
Speaker 1: to Aria since she works with energies and you know,

490
00:27:41,440 --> 00:27:45,320
Speaker 1: like like, how do you deal with all these energies

491
00:27:45,320 --> 00:27:47,720
Speaker 1: that you're constantly in contact with and not allow them

492
00:27:47,720 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 1: to affect you? And and yeah, I do. Um. You

493
00:27:54,320 --> 00:27:58,280
Speaker 1: have to be really grounded in yourself. Um. And there's

494
00:27:58,320 --> 00:28:01,119
Speaker 1: a lot of UM. There's a lot of ways you

495
00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:03,560
Speaker 1: can do that. One of the easiest ways to be

496
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:08,879
Speaker 1: grounded in yourself is to literally um. So, so the

497
00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:12,639
Speaker 1: earth gives off a vibration, the earth gives off an energy. UM.

498
00:28:12,680 --> 00:28:15,199
Speaker 1: And when we are most imbalanced and most in tune,

499
00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:17,960
Speaker 1: we are in tune literally with that frequency of the earth.

500
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,840
Speaker 1: So a very simple way takes no therapy, takes no medicine,

501
00:28:22,359 --> 00:28:26,400
Speaker 1: is literally just walking into nature barefoot well and literally

502
00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:32,639
Speaker 1: those sound vibrations go into your body and UM, and

503
00:28:32,680 --> 00:28:35,280
Speaker 1: you become more grounded. And not only to become more

504
00:28:35,280 --> 00:28:39,080
Speaker 1: physically grounded, um, because all of our vibrations and all

505
00:28:39,120 --> 00:28:42,120
Speaker 1: of our energies are so into related body, mind, and spirit.

506
00:28:42,840 --> 00:28:45,680
Speaker 1: The energies go into your body and it um connects

507
00:28:45,720 --> 00:28:48,640
Speaker 1: to your your spirit body and your emotional body. So

508
00:28:48,720 --> 00:28:52,040
Speaker 1: by doing things that are physically grounding, um, such as

509
00:28:52,120 --> 00:28:54,240
Speaker 1: what I just said, like going barefoot like in a

510
00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:59,200
Speaker 1: park or something, um, you will find that you're right

511
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:04,200
Speaker 1: of course at us park, Yeah, depending on the right

512
00:29:04,200 --> 00:29:07,640
Speaker 1: bring some footlops just in case, really scope out the

513
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:11,440
Speaker 1: ground you're walking on. Um. But that will literally make

514
00:29:11,480 --> 00:29:14,440
Speaker 1: you more sparcely and emotionally grounded. If you can do

515
00:29:14,520 --> 00:29:19,959
Speaker 1: something that's physically grounding. Unna be hard though, when you know,

516
00:29:20,480 --> 00:29:22,720
Speaker 1: my boyfriend walks in and it's just like God, it

517
00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:24,160
Speaker 1: was a rough day at work, and I'm like see

518
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:26,600
Speaker 1: uh and I just like run how I'm like hark

519
00:29:29,400 --> 00:29:32,840
Speaker 1: were in paradise without me. I'll be back right. That

520
00:29:33,000 --> 00:29:35,440
Speaker 1: is the thing like when I almost you know, if

521
00:29:35,440 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 1: Brennan's in a bad mood and I'm happy, I feel

522
00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:43,720
Speaker 1: bad being happy, you know, or showing happiness. Sure, and

523
00:29:43,760 --> 00:29:45,760
Speaker 1: I think that's where especially you know, when you live

524
00:29:45,800 --> 00:29:47,840
Speaker 1: with someone and it's the other way around. I'm sure

525
00:29:47,880 --> 00:29:49,760
Speaker 1: you know, when I'm grumpy and she's in a good

526
00:29:50,000 --> 00:29:52,960
Speaker 1: you want to match. We've I find we like end

527
00:29:53,000 --> 00:29:55,480
Speaker 1: up like we were joking that our periods are in sync,

528
00:29:55,520 --> 00:29:58,600
Speaker 1: but like our minds, like our emotions are in sync,

529
00:29:58,640 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 1: where like you can didn't even explain it. But if

530
00:30:01,040 --> 00:30:02,520
Speaker 1: she's in a bat, I'm also in a bat and

531
00:30:02,520 --> 00:30:05,520
Speaker 1: we're both quiet for like hours, and we're like, wait,

532
00:30:05,560 --> 00:30:08,240
Speaker 1: what the fuck? Why were we both? Cris and I

533
00:30:08,280 --> 00:30:09,520
Speaker 1: do the thing where I go, are you mad at me?

534
00:30:09,520 --> 00:30:11,600
Speaker 1: And he goes, are you mad at me? And like

535
00:30:11,680 --> 00:30:16,640
Speaker 1: why are we both in that? We know hile I've

536
00:30:16,640 --> 00:30:19,200
Speaker 1: been doing mailbox though, the thing that I presented last

537
00:30:19,200 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 1: week or two weeks ago, the mailbox thing that I

538
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:24,400
Speaker 1: do where this weekend I got in like a heated

539
00:30:24,520 --> 00:30:26,640
Speaker 1: talk like Chris and I were having a discussion and

540
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,000
Speaker 1: then it got to start like argument territory of like

541
00:30:29,360 --> 00:30:31,680
Speaker 1: I was feeling like he was judging me and mad

542
00:30:31,720 --> 00:30:34,239
Speaker 1: at me, and I was getting like I did end

543
00:30:34,320 --> 00:30:38,280
Speaker 1: up exploding, but before after that and I was able

544
00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:41,280
Speaker 1: to calm down, I was like, Okay, if if someone's

545
00:30:41,360 --> 00:30:46,920
Speaker 1: mad or upset with or confronting, or like if if

546
00:30:47,040 --> 00:30:48,920
Speaker 1: Chris goes out to the mailbox to get mail and

547
00:30:48,960 --> 00:30:50,760
Speaker 1: he's had a bad day at work, the mailbox doesn't

548
00:30:50,880 --> 00:30:54,720
Speaker 1: change at all because of his mood. Just I try.

549
00:30:54,760 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 1: I literally was like, just be a mailbox, Like what

550
00:30:57,760 --> 00:30:59,840
Speaker 1: what would a mailbox? Okay, but what do you do

551
00:31:00,320 --> 00:31:03,120
Speaker 1: with this energy? And then you just pretend like you're

552
00:31:03,120 --> 00:31:05,360
Speaker 1: a thing that can't absorb anyone in the energy? I

553
00:31:05,400 --> 00:31:06,800
Speaker 1: get that, But you're in a room, you're in a

554
00:31:06,800 --> 00:31:10,120
Speaker 1: living room with your boyfriend and or a girlfriend and

555
00:31:10,120 --> 00:31:13,240
Speaker 1: they're upset and angry from telling you where you literally

556
00:31:13,280 --> 00:31:15,040
Speaker 1: in your mind, I know, but in your mind, just

557
00:31:15,040 --> 00:31:16,920
Speaker 1: go what would a mailbox film? What are you doing

558
00:31:17,600 --> 00:31:21,320
Speaker 1: this table? Are you laughing at TV? Are you enjoy you?

559
00:31:21,440 --> 00:31:24,200
Speaker 1: Just you just imagine that you are and just see

560
00:31:24,200 --> 00:31:26,920
Speaker 1: what happens. Imagine that you're something that has that has

561
00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:31,360
Speaker 1: What are you actually do like watch TV or whatever

562
00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,280
Speaker 1: it is, or or just just see what it sounds like.

563
00:31:34,320 --> 00:31:37,120
Speaker 1: When you talk to your girlfriend. But thinking about being

564
00:31:37,120 --> 00:31:39,160
Speaker 1: a mailbox, you can't just go hey, i'm gonna I'm

565
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:40,920
Speaker 1: just gonna I'm gonna leave for a while because I'm

566
00:31:40,920 --> 00:31:42,680
Speaker 1: in a good mood. You're in a bad mood. I'm

567
00:31:42,680 --> 00:31:44,400
Speaker 1: going to stay in. You want to talk about it?

568
00:31:44,760 --> 00:31:46,360
Speaker 1: Do you want to talk about You can say do

569
00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:47,840
Speaker 1: you want to talk about it? And if they say no,

570
00:31:47,960 --> 00:31:50,280
Speaker 1: then go well if you do, I'm here, you know, like,

571
00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,400
Speaker 1: because sometimes you go no, but you really do want

572
00:31:52,440 --> 00:31:53,840
Speaker 1: to talk about it, then you can go okay, well

573
00:31:53,880 --> 00:31:56,320
Speaker 1: I hear you. Then I won't ask. But if you

574
00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:58,000
Speaker 1: do want to talk about it, I'm here, and then

575
00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,120
Speaker 1: just continue being being a mailbox or like what ever

576
00:32:00,160 --> 00:32:01,840
Speaker 1: it is to you, Like pick an object in the

577
00:32:01,880 --> 00:32:04,480
Speaker 1: room and be like, okay, this soda can No matter

578
00:32:04,480 --> 00:32:07,240
Speaker 1: how pissy Andrew is right now, it's not going to change.

579
00:32:07,440 --> 00:32:10,000
Speaker 1: I mean, you could probably talk about on a cellular level,

580
00:32:10,080 --> 00:32:12,480
Speaker 1: maybe something is going on. It could feel the energy

581
00:32:12,520 --> 00:32:15,560
Speaker 1: of Andrew. But it doesn't. It doesn't start crumpling and

582
00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:19,120
Speaker 1: go I'm a bad can because Andrews man. It doesn't

583
00:32:19,120 --> 00:32:24,000
Speaker 1: do this. It just it doesn't and you don't have

584
00:32:24,080 --> 00:32:26,160
Speaker 1: to do that. We don't have to take on these things.

585
00:32:26,200 --> 00:32:28,800
Speaker 1: And I know that from something that I read. I

586
00:32:28,800 --> 00:32:31,959
Speaker 1: don't know when, but when your partner is in a

587
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:34,600
Speaker 1: bad mood and you take on that anger and go, yeah,

588
00:32:34,760 --> 00:32:37,880
Speaker 1: fuck that person you work with, fuck them. You're robbing

589
00:32:37,960 --> 00:32:41,800
Speaker 1: them of having of their feelings. You're taking some of

590
00:32:41,840 --> 00:32:44,719
Speaker 1: their feelings and trying to get through the feelings faster

591
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:47,840
Speaker 1: and not let there rob You're robbing them, You're get

592
00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:50,440
Speaker 1: you're taking from their feelings, and it's not a good

593
00:32:50,480 --> 00:32:53,160
Speaker 1: thing to do is to pile on with them. It

594
00:32:53,240 --> 00:32:55,280
Speaker 1: actually doesn't help. Even though it seems like that might

595
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:56,920
Speaker 1: be what the person wants, and even might be what

596
00:32:56,960 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 1: the person says they want, it's not actually outful. It's

597
00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:03,880
Speaker 1: one thing what so as sound tailors were trained, you know,

598
00:33:03,880 --> 00:33:07,440
Speaker 1: because we work with people's energy all the time. So UM,

599
00:33:07,480 --> 00:33:10,400
Speaker 1: as an m path, you can just suck that energy

600
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,560
Speaker 1: right up and like you start feeling what they're feeling

601
00:33:12,720 --> 00:33:17,240
Speaker 1: right instantly. They teach us to really ground ourselves even

602
00:33:17,320 --> 00:33:20,280
Speaker 1: to the UM. There's a lot of science behind the

603
00:33:20,280 --> 00:33:22,680
Speaker 1: science of UM, a lot of science beyond the science

604
00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:28,000
Speaker 1: of visualization. So doing a visualization exercise so you can

605
00:33:28,040 --> 00:33:33,160
Speaker 1: literally visualize yourself zipping your energy up. Yeah, and that

606
00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:37,000
Speaker 1: literally will help you keep your energy within your energy

607
00:33:37,080 --> 00:33:39,200
Speaker 1: and keep the other energy from That's what I'm saying.

608
00:33:39,320 --> 00:33:42,760
Speaker 1: I visualize myself being a mailbox and whatever visualization is

609
00:33:42,840 --> 00:33:45,320
Speaker 1: it just like for me, that's my thing might go to.

610
00:33:45,440 --> 00:33:47,120
Speaker 1: But whatever that could be for you, What do you

611
00:33:47,160 --> 00:33:48,800
Speaker 1: mean zipping your energy up? Like you're almost in a

612
00:33:48,800 --> 00:33:51,000
Speaker 1: sleeping like almost as if your aura is like has

613
00:33:51,000 --> 00:33:53,800
Speaker 1: a zipper on it, and you're like, and so their

614
00:33:53,880 --> 00:33:57,040
Speaker 1: energy can't penetrate yours or yours can't you penetrate them?

615
00:33:57,280 --> 00:34:01,120
Speaker 1: Their energy cannot penetrate you. You are strong younger because

616
00:34:01,160 --> 00:34:04,560
Speaker 1: you are no longer vulnerable, but you don't want to

617
00:34:04,560 --> 00:34:07,640
Speaker 1: ignore it, you know, so you can still send out.

618
00:34:07,720 --> 00:34:11,040
Speaker 1: So your intention has vibration, because if you're ignoring their energy,

619
00:34:11,120 --> 00:34:15,359
Speaker 1: trying to manipulate what they're going through, it's still that's

620
00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:18,239
Speaker 1: still you being aware of their energy, right, You're still

621
00:34:18,280 --> 00:34:22,000
Speaker 1: aware of it, influenced by right, So but you're trying

622
00:34:22,040 --> 00:34:24,239
Speaker 1: to change it, you're not trying. I think there's a

623
00:34:24,239 --> 00:34:26,040
Speaker 1: lot of there's a big difference between an EmPATH and

624
00:34:26,040 --> 00:34:28,879
Speaker 1: a child of an alcoholic. As child children of alcoholics,

625
00:34:29,360 --> 00:34:31,879
Speaker 1: we are know, when things are chaotic in the house,

626
00:34:31,960 --> 00:34:34,120
Speaker 1: no one's talking about the chaos, and so we are

627
00:34:34,120 --> 00:34:37,520
Speaker 1: trying to constantly manage it. Cheer everyone up, look over here,

628
00:34:37,560 --> 00:34:39,719
Speaker 1: don't look at this this thing that no one's talking

629
00:34:39,719 --> 00:34:43,440
Speaker 1: about that's destroying our family insidiously. And so children of

630
00:34:43,440 --> 00:34:46,640
Speaker 1: alcoholics constantly are reading a room like is this person okay?

631
00:34:46,680 --> 00:34:49,160
Speaker 1: Is this person okay? Because your house was chaos, no

632
00:34:49,200 --> 00:34:51,520
Speaker 1: one was talking about it, and you would, you would

633
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:54,040
Speaker 1: to create this this you had to be much more

634
00:34:54,080 --> 00:34:56,719
Speaker 1: perceptive to survive and to get by and to and

635
00:34:56,840 --> 00:34:59,000
Speaker 1: you and you have a false sense of control that

636
00:34:59,040 --> 00:35:01,600
Speaker 1: you can control other peop those emotions, and you've got

637
00:35:01,600 --> 00:35:04,080
Speaker 1: to give that up. A mailbox, for me, cannot change

638
00:35:04,080 --> 00:35:07,080
Speaker 1: someone's emotions, and mailbox cannot absorb people's emotions. So for me,

639
00:35:07,160 --> 00:35:10,480
Speaker 1: that visualization kind of help. And I would just finally

640
00:35:10,520 --> 00:35:12,920
Speaker 1: say to your color, like zip yourself up and send

641
00:35:12,920 --> 00:35:18,240
Speaker 1: loving energy out if her voice, if her boyfriend, because

642
00:35:18,560 --> 00:35:21,560
Speaker 1: a loving energy literally changes the vibration, So if they

643
00:35:21,560 --> 00:35:25,000
Speaker 1: can change the vibration from a loving vibration. Whenever I'm

644
00:35:25,000 --> 00:35:28,640
Speaker 1: like feeling upset with my partner and I'm like focusing

645
00:35:28,640 --> 00:35:30,640
Speaker 1: on all these things that are ticking me off. I

646
00:35:30,719 --> 00:35:32,200
Speaker 1: do this one thing that I'm gonna talk about right

647
00:35:32,200 --> 00:35:37,200
Speaker 1: after we get back from this brain We're back. As

648
00:35:37,200 --> 00:35:40,839
Speaker 1: I was saying, when I start to feel like my

649
00:35:41,040 --> 00:35:44,279
Speaker 1: partner is upset with me, it was going to be

650
00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:47,600
Speaker 1: upset about something or or I'm focusing on like he

651
00:35:47,640 --> 00:35:50,080
Speaker 1: does this and this and this and and like nothing

652
00:35:50,160 --> 00:35:52,520
Speaker 1: I ever do is right, whatever story I'm telling myself about,

653
00:35:52,600 --> 00:35:55,640
Speaker 1: whatever complaint he has a right to have. You know,

654
00:35:56,320 --> 00:36:00,759
Speaker 1: I will try to stop myself before I spiral into them.

655
00:36:00,800 --> 00:36:02,359
Speaker 1: We're not meant to be together. I should just leave.

656
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:04,120
Speaker 1: I should plan an exit, like all these things that

657
00:36:04,200 --> 00:36:06,719
Speaker 1: I do, because I'm so scared of rejection and I'm

658
00:36:06,760 --> 00:36:10,080
Speaker 1: scared of also being stuck in something that is that

659
00:36:10,280 --> 00:36:12,160
Speaker 1: is where I'm going to be miserable that I start.

660
00:36:12,520 --> 00:36:15,160
Speaker 1: I start just going to like, let me just plan

661
00:36:15,239 --> 00:36:18,600
Speaker 1: my exit, and now I stop myself when I go like,

662
00:36:19,239 --> 00:36:21,600
Speaker 1: I don't do it. I should write it down, but like,

663
00:36:21,840 --> 00:36:24,160
Speaker 1: write down all the things you love about him, like

664
00:36:24,600 --> 00:36:27,360
Speaker 1: just stop this, try to stop this train of hate

665
00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:30,440
Speaker 1: that you can just keep adding to. God knows for anyone.

666
00:36:30,480 --> 00:36:32,160
Speaker 1: We can come up with a million things, a million

667
00:36:32,160 --> 00:36:34,400
Speaker 1: reasons why this person shouldn't be in our lives if

668
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:37,400
Speaker 1: we really wanted to just try your best to just

669
00:36:37,440 --> 00:36:39,080
Speaker 1: write all the things you love about them, and then

670
00:36:39,120 --> 00:36:42,160
Speaker 1: that's a way to actually conjure that like that energy

671
00:36:42,200 --> 00:36:45,080
Speaker 1: of like I love you like that, just like warm energy.

672
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:48,239
Speaker 1: And man, that has helped me a lot too. Is

673
00:36:48,280 --> 00:36:50,400
Speaker 1: just And that's what I've had to tell Chris before,

674
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:53,680
Speaker 1: because sometimes he likes to have arguments devoid of emotion

675
00:36:53,800 --> 00:36:55,440
Speaker 1: because he doesn't want to air on the side of

676
00:36:55,640 --> 00:36:58,480
Speaker 1: negative emotions. He doesn't want to get to like like

677
00:36:58,719 --> 00:37:01,160
Speaker 1: upset where we're crying at each other about how hurt

678
00:37:01,200 --> 00:37:03,360
Speaker 1: we are. But when he turns off that emotion, it

679
00:37:03,400 --> 00:37:06,400
Speaker 1: also turns off the loving emotion. And so I'm getting

680
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:10,000
Speaker 1: a robot telling me, listen, I've noticed this thing, and

681
00:37:10,000 --> 00:37:11,840
Speaker 1: if we're going to be together, I need this and

682
00:37:11,920 --> 00:37:15,200
Speaker 1: this and this, and it becomes it's it's devoid of

683
00:37:15,239 --> 00:37:19,239
Speaker 1: all the anger emotions that would be very triggering for me.

684
00:37:19,520 --> 00:37:23,359
Speaker 1: But in doing that turning that feelings faucet off, he's

685
00:37:23,400 --> 00:37:25,200
Speaker 1: doing it so that he protects me. He even says, like,

686
00:37:25,239 --> 00:37:28,680
Speaker 1: I want this to be an emotionless conversation, very practical

687
00:37:29,160 --> 00:37:32,080
Speaker 1: and for me I realized recently, and I told them, like,

688
00:37:33,160 --> 00:37:36,759
Speaker 1: we have to risk getting negative emotions. I can handle that.

689
00:37:36,800 --> 00:37:39,160
Speaker 1: It might be brutal, and I know that's very scary,

690
00:37:39,200 --> 00:37:43,080
Speaker 1: but I cannot. I cannot have. I need to know

691
00:37:43,160 --> 00:37:45,520
Speaker 1: that you love me throughout this whole thing. I need

692
00:37:45,560 --> 00:37:47,360
Speaker 1: the love there. So like when you're turning off the

693
00:37:48,560 --> 00:37:51,440
Speaker 1: anger and the meanness and the cruelty, you're also turning

694
00:37:51,480 --> 00:37:53,919
Speaker 1: off the ability to have the other side of that

695
00:37:53,920 --> 00:37:56,920
Speaker 1: that I need to couch the things. I need a

696
00:37:57,000 --> 00:38:00,360
Speaker 1: hand on my leg two as I'm hearing something that

697
00:38:00,440 --> 00:38:05,600
Speaker 1: could have about myself. I just need that, you know.

698
00:38:05,960 --> 00:38:09,240
Speaker 1: It's if someone is like for me, like in my mind,

699
00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:12,560
Speaker 1: I'm just like, oh, this anger or whatever that person

700
00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:15,880
Speaker 1: is feeling is unjustifiable to me. It's hard for me

701
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:19,759
Speaker 1: to be loving to that person. And like, even if

702
00:38:19,880 --> 00:38:22,000
Speaker 1: I know everything in my bone, I just want to

703
00:38:22,040 --> 00:38:25,680
Speaker 1: hug the person, but it's just it's impossible. I can't

704
00:38:25,719 --> 00:38:28,600
Speaker 1: do it. And so like, I don't know, But that's

705
00:38:28,600 --> 00:38:30,719
Speaker 1: where you need to stop and go. Here's all the

706
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:33,759
Speaker 1: reasons I love them. Yeah, let's stick this out of

707
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:35,640
Speaker 1: the let's let's take this thing. But I just I'm

708
00:38:35,640 --> 00:38:38,239
Speaker 1: focusing on out of the equation. Try to like tuck

709
00:38:38,320 --> 00:38:39,840
Speaker 1: that away and let me just focus on all the

710
00:38:39,840 --> 00:38:43,160
Speaker 1: things I love about them, because this is another thing

711
00:38:43,200 --> 00:38:45,160
Speaker 1: that I just I need to practice myself. But I

712
00:38:45,200 --> 00:38:48,440
Speaker 1: also always ask for whenever I've disappointed someone is like,

713
00:38:48,719 --> 00:38:51,719
Speaker 1: if you think I did this thing because I purposely

714
00:38:51,760 --> 00:38:55,040
Speaker 1: wanted to hurt you, then you should not be friends

715
00:38:55,080 --> 00:38:58,200
Speaker 1: with me. I'm a sociopath. If I realized I hurt you,

716
00:38:58,600 --> 00:39:00,799
Speaker 1: But do realize that it's on an intentional and it

717
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:04,160
Speaker 1: could be it could be me being thoughtless and not

718
00:39:04,280 --> 00:39:07,200
Speaker 1: considering you and all the things that are hurtful. But

719
00:39:07,320 --> 00:39:10,520
Speaker 1: if you think it was intentional, man, get away from me,

720
00:39:10,840 --> 00:39:13,760
Speaker 1: because that's a psychopath. So always extend to the person

721
00:39:13,800 --> 00:39:16,640
Speaker 1: that you love or that you're getting in an argument

722
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:19,239
Speaker 1: with that and I have to do this. I I

723
00:39:19,280 --> 00:39:21,440
Speaker 1: asked for this from my partner, but I have to

724
00:39:21,480 --> 00:39:25,000
Speaker 1: extend it to my partner that when he upsets me,

725
00:39:25,320 --> 00:39:28,840
Speaker 1: I have to remember he's not trying to upset me

726
00:39:28,960 --> 00:39:31,080
Speaker 1: or trying to hurt me. If that were the case,

727
00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:34,600
Speaker 1: Get the funk away from this guy, and I know

728
00:39:34,719 --> 00:39:37,839
Speaker 1: he's not doing that. So I always whenever we get

729
00:39:37,880 --> 00:39:40,400
Speaker 1: into fights, I always am like, just try to understand

730
00:39:40,400 --> 00:39:43,879
Speaker 1: that everything I do, I try to do everything from

731
00:39:43,880 --> 00:39:46,360
Speaker 1: a lens of like I want you and everyone in

732
00:39:46,400 --> 00:39:48,600
Speaker 1: the world to look me more. I'm never trying to

733
00:39:48,719 --> 00:39:52,879
Speaker 1: upset anyone, and if I am it, um, I hope

734
00:39:52,880 --> 00:39:54,480
Speaker 1: that I will. I mean, I have tried to upset

735
00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:56,600
Speaker 1: people before. I've tried to hurt people before when I'm

736
00:39:56,600 --> 00:40:00,359
Speaker 1: really in a bad place. But I don't even if

737
00:40:00,360 --> 00:40:03,400
Speaker 1: I'm doing that. It's I don't mean to excuse it.

738
00:40:03,400 --> 00:40:06,560
Speaker 1: It's I'm just saying it's it can be. It's because

739
00:40:06,600 --> 00:40:09,480
Speaker 1: I'm feeling backed into a corner. I'm feeling like a

740
00:40:09,520 --> 00:40:12,080
Speaker 1: dog that like you know, snaps that someone's trying to

741
00:40:12,080 --> 00:40:15,120
Speaker 1: help it, like I can't help it, like the person

742
00:40:15,160 --> 00:40:17,719
Speaker 1: you're with cannot help what they're doing. No, I think

743
00:40:17,840 --> 00:40:20,239
Speaker 1: I think what it is with me is like if

744
00:40:20,280 --> 00:40:22,839
Speaker 1: I give the hug right and it and it just

745
00:40:22,920 --> 00:40:25,439
Speaker 1: like everything goes back to being fine because the hug

746
00:40:25,560 --> 00:40:29,200
Speaker 1: was given. But then you go, well, that's not going

747
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:32,160
Speaker 1: to stop it from happening it again because the person

748
00:40:32,239 --> 00:40:34,480
Speaker 1: gets rewarded with a hug and then it's over and

749
00:40:34,520 --> 00:40:36,320
Speaker 1: then it just you know what I mean, It shouldn't

750
00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:37,839
Speaker 1: be a bomb. But you should be able to hug

751
00:40:37,880 --> 00:40:43,040
Speaker 1: and also respond negatively or like say the thing that

752
00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:50,000
Speaker 1: you need to do to defend yourself. But with I

753
00:40:50,080 --> 00:40:52,799
Speaker 1: do the same thing of like, I refuse to anymore.

754
00:40:53,520 --> 00:40:56,560
Speaker 1: I think I just wanted to keep a boyfriend and

755
00:40:56,640 --> 00:41:00,040
Speaker 1: keep keep him in my life no matter why it.

756
00:41:00,440 --> 00:41:03,719
Speaker 1: And now I have to really stop myself from just

757
00:41:03,840 --> 00:41:05,680
Speaker 1: giving the person what they want. As a child of

758
00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:10,000
Speaker 1: an alcoholic, uh, any child of an alcoholic, what you

759
00:41:10,080 --> 00:41:13,480
Speaker 1: do is you just try to make things everyone okay

760
00:41:13,520 --> 00:41:17,520
Speaker 1: at any cards, throw your throw your ons and needs

761
00:41:17,719 --> 00:41:21,719
Speaker 1: down the fucking drain. Everyone else comes first. And honestly,

762
00:41:22,080 --> 00:41:25,520
Speaker 1: your ones and needs are stopping everyone from uh, like,

763
00:41:25,920 --> 00:41:28,920
Speaker 1: are making it harder for everything to be calm and cool.

764
00:41:29,120 --> 00:41:33,040
Speaker 1: So just get rid of those. And that never works.

765
00:41:33,160 --> 00:41:36,080
Speaker 1: It will always build. It leads to resentment. You are

766
00:41:36,120 --> 00:41:39,239
Speaker 1: not actually doing anything to calm the situation. You were

767
00:41:39,280 --> 00:41:41,399
Speaker 1: just creating a fight down the road. You're just like,

768
00:41:41,920 --> 00:41:45,000
Speaker 1: you're just building a damn and it's going to break

769
00:41:45,040 --> 00:41:47,920
Speaker 1: at some point. So you know, yeah, it's a mixture

770
00:41:47,920 --> 00:41:50,719
Speaker 1: of being loving while also standing up for yourself and

771
00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:54,640
Speaker 1: and I mean really just last night, you know, getting

772
00:41:54,640 --> 00:41:59,319
Speaker 1: into getting into arguments sometimes, um, I just last night

773
00:41:59,320 --> 00:42:01,080
Speaker 1: a good device is. I was like, what do you

774
00:42:01,120 --> 00:42:04,040
Speaker 1: need from me? Because I kept like defending myself and

775
00:42:04,239 --> 00:42:06,279
Speaker 1: being like, but no, but this, and I'm like and

776
00:42:06,320 --> 00:42:08,319
Speaker 1: he's like, I'm like, well, then what do you need

777
00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:10,440
Speaker 1: from me? If if everything I'm saying in response is it?

778
00:42:10,520 --> 00:42:11,960
Speaker 1: And I was like, what do you need? And it

779
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:14,120
Speaker 1: was like it was a great question because he goes,

780
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:16,600
Speaker 1: I need you to listen, and then I just zipped

781
00:42:16,600 --> 00:42:21,960
Speaker 1: it and listened and then yes, because although I thought, oh, here,

782
00:42:22,000 --> 00:42:24,160
Speaker 1: I'm listening to the same thing he said a million

783
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:26,359
Speaker 1: times over, and part of it was the same thing

784
00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:28,120
Speaker 1: he had said a million times over that I got

785
00:42:28,280 --> 00:42:32,960
Speaker 1: through and through. There was something about letting him finish

786
00:42:33,000 --> 00:42:36,440
Speaker 1: his thought fully, which wasn't just like, you know, talking

787
00:42:36,480 --> 00:42:38,440
Speaker 1: as soon as he took a breath. It was like

788
00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:40,279
Speaker 1: letting him take a breath and then continue. And then

789
00:42:40,320 --> 00:42:42,680
Speaker 1: I started hearing things that I didn't hear at first,

790
00:42:42,719 --> 00:42:46,640
Speaker 1: and I wasn't hearing, and the issue completely resolved itself,

791
00:42:46,640 --> 00:42:49,239
Speaker 1: and I felt so much better being able to give

792
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:52,200
Speaker 1: That's what he wanted was to be heard. It wasn't

793
00:42:53,320 --> 00:42:56,160
Speaker 1: whether or not I think he's right, It just being

794
00:42:56,239 --> 00:42:59,600
Speaker 1: heard and being understood where that comes from, even if

795
00:42:59,600 --> 00:43:02,440
Speaker 1: you don't agree with where they're coming from, repeating it

796
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:04,160
Speaker 1: back to them and being like, Okay, so you felt

797
00:43:04,239 --> 00:43:07,799
Speaker 1: hurt because I did this thing. It just it just

798
00:43:08,360 --> 00:43:10,560
Speaker 1: makes all the difference. But saying what do you need

799
00:43:10,600 --> 00:43:12,799
Speaker 1: in a fight from to the other person, if it's

800
00:43:12,840 --> 00:43:18,759
Speaker 1: just getting what you want from me? Yeah? What's that

801
00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:22,680
Speaker 1: guy's name? Adam? What do you want? He was great?

802
00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:26,160
Speaker 1: What do you want from me? He was on American Idol?

803
00:43:26,160 --> 00:43:32,760
Speaker 1: He wanted Lambert? Adam Lambert? Yes, didn't he do? Like? Yeah?

804
00:43:32,760 --> 00:43:35,360
Speaker 1: He filled in for que Yeah, and he did a

805
00:43:35,360 --> 00:43:38,000
Speaker 1: really good job of that. God, he's amazing. Um. All right,

806
00:43:38,719 --> 00:43:42,240
Speaker 1: what a great question, Michelle. Are we let's keep going? Well?

807
00:43:42,480 --> 00:43:44,640
Speaker 1: I gotta ask you, NICKI can we keep going? Don't

808
00:43:44,640 --> 00:43:47,360
Speaker 1: you have an interview now? Oh? Yeah? Is at two o'clock?

809
00:43:47,719 --> 00:43:52,120
Speaker 1: Oh god? What do they want from me? I got

810
00:43:52,120 --> 00:43:55,000
Speaker 1: to talk to the Denver Post to promote my special?

811
00:43:56,040 --> 00:43:58,279
Speaker 1: Final thought? Can I just say, can everyone check out

812
00:43:58,280 --> 00:44:00,560
Speaker 1: my special? It's called Good Clean Filth. It's coming out

813
00:44:01,160 --> 00:44:05,360
Speaker 1: on HBO max Um after a debuts on HBO July.

814
00:44:06,840 --> 00:44:09,919
Speaker 1: F Boy Island will start July. Make sure to watch

815
00:44:10,000 --> 00:44:12,239
Speaker 1: that with me. I will, Um, I'm gonna do something

816
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:14,279
Speaker 1: where we have like a watch party or some kind

817
00:44:14,320 --> 00:44:16,040
Speaker 1: of thing. But get into that show. I think the

818
00:44:16,040 --> 00:44:18,399
Speaker 1: first three episodes drop on the fourteenth, and then it'll

819
00:44:18,440 --> 00:44:21,520
Speaker 1: be like every week, so it'll be you know, there'll

820
00:44:21,520 --> 00:44:23,640
Speaker 1: be cliffhangers. It will be so fun to watch Fboy

821
00:44:23,640 --> 00:44:26,160
Speaker 1: Island season two, which you know as Perfect Strangers too.

822
00:44:26,239 --> 00:44:27,719
Speaker 1: When we were talking about it before I can talk

823
00:44:27,760 --> 00:44:30,080
Speaker 1: about it and then um, and then my special comes

824
00:44:30,120 --> 00:44:32,440
Speaker 1: out Good Clean filth on HBO. Watch it the night

825
00:44:32,480 --> 00:44:34,880
Speaker 1: it premieres if you're able to, and then if not,

826
00:44:34,960 --> 00:44:37,560
Speaker 1: you can watch it an HBO Max uh the following day.

827
00:44:37,600 --> 00:44:41,560
Speaker 1: I believe, and UM, tell your friends posted on Instagram, TikTok,

828
00:44:41,600 --> 00:44:43,239
Speaker 1: whatever you can. It really means a lot to me.

829
00:44:43,480 --> 00:44:46,960
Speaker 1: And thank you so much everyone who UM talked to

830
00:44:47,120 --> 00:44:49,960
Speaker 1: the show. And also August, Andrew is going to be

831
00:44:50,000 --> 00:44:51,800
Speaker 1: at Sanys in Nashville. If you want to plan a

832
00:44:51,840 --> 00:44:54,640
Speaker 1: weekend around that, UM, go see him there. Get tickets

833
00:44:54,680 --> 00:44:58,840
Speaker 1: at I'm guessing just google Zanies Nashville and August uh

834
00:44:58,920 --> 00:45:01,680
Speaker 1: is when Andrew will be head there, So go see him.

835
00:45:01,719 --> 00:45:03,399
Speaker 1: And Aria, thank you so much for being here for

836
00:45:04,000 --> 00:45:08,520
Speaker 1: two of our shows. Here Aria Sound one oh eight

837
00:45:08,640 --> 00:45:11,200
Speaker 1: dot com. Um is the website that you can check

838
00:45:11,200 --> 00:45:14,080
Speaker 1: out Aria's sound healing and set up an appointment with her.

839
00:45:14,640 --> 00:45:17,440
Speaker 1: And UM, yeah, you're gonna love it. And you're such

840
00:45:17,480 --> 00:45:19,319
Speaker 1: a great guess. I can't wait to hear everyone speed

841
00:45:19,360 --> 00:45:22,040
Speaker 1: back about your appearance. If I can't wait. Thank you

842
00:45:22,040 --> 00:45:23,960
Speaker 1: for being so open, Thank you for being my friend.

843
00:45:24,800 --> 00:45:27,480
Speaker 1: And um, I love you so much, Andrew love you. No,

844
00:45:27,640 --> 00:45:31,160
Speaker 1: I love you. Um guys, don't be cut out there

845
00:45:31,360 --> 00:45:36,880
Speaker 1: and chee oh wait, who's that guy? That the British

846
00:45:36,880 --> 00:45:41,399
Speaker 1: comedian that's attractive? Jack Whitehall? Jack Whitehall. Yes, I came

847
00:45:41,480 --> 00:45:43,000
Speaker 1: up with one, but it didn't really go Jack Whack.

848
00:45:43,360 --> 00:45:47,879
Speaker 1: It worked, Jack black Little, Oh my god,