1 00:00:00,320 --> 00:00:03,279 Speaker 1: I um tell me that you carry like my feelings 2 00:00:03,279 --> 00:00:05,840 Speaker 1: don't be hurt. But I have a pre tape at 3 00:00:05,840 --> 00:00:07,600 Speaker 1: the bureau that came up today, so I couldn't do 4 00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:10,160 Speaker 1: a whole thing of makeup because I'm having making I 5 00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:11,920 Speaker 1: don't know, do my maip do I look ridiculous? But 6 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:14,920 Speaker 1: I don't have na. No, you look gorgeous. Your hair 7 00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:18,439 Speaker 1: looks amazing. You have good hair. That's the Black Folks Day. 8 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:24,480 Speaker 1: Welcome back on this edition of Naked with Carry Champion, journalist, 9 00:00:24,600 --> 00:00:28,560 Speaker 1: television host and author author. I love to say that 10 00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:46,680 Speaker 1: title very important, Tiffany Cross. Every champion and carry Champion 11 00:00:46,800 --> 00:00:48,960 Speaker 1: is to be a champion out of champion and carry 12 00:00:49,040 --> 00:00:52,720 Speaker 1: Chappion and carry Chapiota Chappion and carry Chappion and carry 13 00:00:52,800 --> 00:00:56,720 Speaker 1: Chappion's sports. And then the tape A connected work. In 14 00:00:56,760 --> 00:00:59,520 Speaker 1: the world of vulnerable considered, we come and remote, the 15 00:00:59,600 --> 00:01:03,000 Speaker 1: veil entertainmous elite. It's the difference between what's real and 16 00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:06,240 Speaker 1: with the public seas. So here's your favorite celebrities behind 17 00:01:06,280 --> 00:01:09,759 Speaker 1: the scenes. It's refreshing. Then the whole story specific life 18 00:01:09,800 --> 00:01:11,960 Speaker 1: all too rendivous to shape the person that you can. 19 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:15,200 Speaker 1: We gotta champion and carry Champion. They did. It's the 20 00:01:15,200 --> 00:01:18,960 Speaker 1: greatest of sports and entertainment connected with every Chappion they carry. 21 00:01:19,040 --> 00:01:21,680 Speaker 1: Champion is to be a champion of Champion. They carry 22 00:01:21,760 --> 00:01:24,440 Speaker 1: Chappi and they can pay chat Chappi, and they carry 23 00:01:24,520 --> 00:01:28,399 Speaker 1: Chappion and carry Chappion sports and the time a connect. Warm, 24 00:01:29,080 --> 00:01:32,399 Speaker 1: good morning, and welcome to the very first edition of 25 00:01:32,600 --> 00:01:35,679 Speaker 1: The Cross Connection. Look, there's a lot of breaking news 26 00:01:35,680 --> 00:01:37,560 Speaker 1: this morning, and we're going to get to it all, 27 00:01:37,600 --> 00:01:40,119 Speaker 1: I promise, not least of which, as you just saw, 28 00:01:40,200 --> 00:01:43,720 Speaker 1: the Food and Drug Administration late Friday night approved the 29 00:01:43,800 --> 00:01:48,080 Speaker 1: first COVID nineteen vaccine, meaning American to be The Cross 30 00:01:48,200 --> 00:01:50,880 Speaker 1: is the host of IMMERSI Lyc's The Cross Connection that 31 00:01:50,960 --> 00:01:54,120 Speaker 1: airs on Saturday's ten to twelve Eastern. She is an 32 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:57,160 Speaker 1: author and she's wrote a book called Said Louder, Black Voters, 33 00:01:57,520 --> 00:02:01,960 Speaker 1: White Narratives and Saving Our Democracy. She has served as 34 00:02:02,000 --> 00:02:05,680 Speaker 1: a Resident Fellow at Harvard Kennedy School Institute of Politics. 35 00:02:06,160 --> 00:02:10,080 Speaker 1: Her experience across media and politics includes more than two 36 00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:15,519 Speaker 1: decades of navigating newsrooms and campaigns while engaging different constituencies. 37 00:02:15,520 --> 00:02:19,280 Speaker 1: In short, she can do it all. Um. I came 38 00:02:19,400 --> 00:02:22,760 Speaker 1: to know Tiffany when she gave a shout out to 39 00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:25,840 Speaker 1: my bou jamal Uh for our new show Won't Stick 40 00:02:25,880 --> 00:02:27,600 Speaker 1: to Sports, and I was watching her and I thought, 41 00:02:27,600 --> 00:02:32,239 Speaker 1: what a great lovely woman. She often appeared on when 42 00:02:32,600 --> 00:02:36,400 Speaker 1: Joey read Joy and Reid had her weekend show. She 43 00:02:36,480 --> 00:02:39,920 Speaker 1: often appeared as a host or excuse me, a guest 44 00:02:39,680 --> 00:02:41,760 Speaker 1: of an analyst on the show, and I always like, oh, 45 00:02:41,760 --> 00:02:45,280 Speaker 1: great personality style this that in the third then our 46 00:02:45,320 --> 00:02:48,919 Speaker 1: Boo Joy got bumped up to Monday through Friday's got 47 00:02:48,919 --> 00:02:54,280 Speaker 1: that promotion, and then here comes Tiffany Tiffany. Tiffany Tiffany, 48 00:02:54,840 --> 00:02:59,800 Speaker 1: well deserved overdue um and she is doing it. She 49 00:03:00,560 --> 00:03:05,160 Speaker 1: has quickly put her stamp on that show. I watch it, 50 00:03:05,240 --> 00:03:07,240 Speaker 1: I've been on it as a guest. Thank you so much. 51 00:03:07,760 --> 00:03:10,880 Speaker 1: She is queen of uplifting other women. She is queen 52 00:03:10,919 --> 00:03:13,200 Speaker 1: of making sure that our stories are told in the 53 00:03:13,240 --> 00:03:17,600 Speaker 1: culture that are important. She will read you respectfully. I 54 00:03:17,639 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 1: love that with the political twist, because she knows what 55 00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:22,520 Speaker 1: she's talking about. She's been in the game for a minute. 56 00:03:23,360 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 1: And now that I get an opportunity to have her 57 00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:29,160 Speaker 1: here un naked, you know, I wanted to get into 58 00:03:29,160 --> 00:03:30,880 Speaker 1: all her business. Y'all. Know how I do. You know 59 00:03:30,919 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 1: how I do? I do? I do um. However, here's 60 00:03:34,760 --> 00:03:37,480 Speaker 1: what's interesting what I was able to learn quickly with 61 00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:42,800 Speaker 1: like like two minutes in, I felt like she was 62 00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:45,960 Speaker 1: a kindred spirit. We grew up the same in a 63 00:03:46,000 --> 00:03:48,400 Speaker 1: lot of ways. We have the same story in the 64 00:03:48,440 --> 00:03:50,240 Speaker 1: sense that it's not the same story, but in the 65 00:03:50,320 --> 00:03:52,640 Speaker 1: sense that I know what you speak of. I can 66 00:03:52,720 --> 00:03:55,520 Speaker 1: relate to that, and so immediately, not only as a 67 00:03:55,560 --> 00:03:59,400 Speaker 1: black woman on television, as a journalist trying to tell 68 00:03:59,440 --> 00:04:01,880 Speaker 1: our story is and and and kill narratives that do 69 00:04:02,000 --> 00:04:06,880 Speaker 1: not uplift us, I immediately knew what she was about. 70 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:11,040 Speaker 1: And to me, that's gotta be honest with you. It's 71 00:04:11,160 --> 00:04:14,520 Speaker 1: rare that I feel like I have that connection with 72 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:16,960 Speaker 1: other women because I do, as I've said on the show, 73 00:04:17,080 --> 00:04:20,559 Speaker 1: often have hard times connecting with other women and having 74 00:04:20,640 --> 00:04:23,760 Speaker 1: real valuable friendships without me feeling like there's something else 75 00:04:23,800 --> 00:04:26,720 Speaker 1: going on there that is nefarious. And that's my ship. 76 00:04:26,800 --> 00:04:29,400 Speaker 1: I'm working on it. But right away Tiffany started talking 77 00:04:29,400 --> 00:04:34,000 Speaker 1: about her her mother and their relationship, and I was like, 78 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:38,279 Speaker 1: I know that I know that relationship. I've shared with 79 00:04:38,320 --> 00:04:41,520 Speaker 1: you guys how much I love my mother, but I 80 00:04:41,520 --> 00:04:44,720 Speaker 1: don't like her, but I know that relationship. And when 81 00:04:45,000 --> 00:04:48,200 Speaker 1: Tiffany and I talked, I promised myself that I would 82 00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:50,080 Speaker 1: get off the phone and call my mom. I did not, 83 00:04:50,680 --> 00:04:54,039 Speaker 1: But what I did also promise myself based on this 84 00:04:54,160 --> 00:04:55,760 Speaker 1: conversation was that I was going to make more of 85 00:04:55,800 --> 00:04:58,760 Speaker 1: an effort to understand her as a human, not as 86 00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:01,760 Speaker 1: my mother, but as a human. You all can relate 87 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:04,400 Speaker 1: to sometimes not treating your parents as if they're human 88 00:05:05,200 --> 00:05:09,000 Speaker 1: because humans make mistakes. Humans are allowed to mess up 89 00:05:09,000 --> 00:05:12,559 Speaker 1: and try again, and oftentimes we don't give that same 90 00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:16,480 Speaker 1: luxury to the people who gave us life. So in 91 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:21,840 Speaker 1: this episode of Naked, UM, I tried to get her 92 00:05:22,000 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 1: to reveal and she just as honest as she can 93 00:05:24,240 --> 00:05:26,039 Speaker 1: possibly be. So it wasn't that I didn't do too 94 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:29,680 Speaker 1: much heavy lifting, um, but we find ourselves interviewing one another, 95 00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:33,600 Speaker 1: and to me, that is beautiful. Uh. Tiffany jumps in 96 00:05:34,440 --> 00:05:37,240 Speaker 1: right away, talks about her childhood, how she grew up, 97 00:05:38,200 --> 00:05:41,599 Speaker 1: her family, and what that all looks like. You'll enjoy 98 00:05:41,680 --> 00:05:47,320 Speaker 1: this edition of Naked. I was born in Cleveland, grew 99 00:05:47,400 --> 00:05:50,760 Speaker 1: up in Atlanta, been in DC for twenty years, so 100 00:05:50,960 --> 00:05:55,279 Speaker 1: I grew up with a single mother who, um, you know, 101 00:05:55,440 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 1: was a challenged woman, you know, like we all are. 102 00:05:57,960 --> 00:06:01,000 Speaker 1: I would call myself a challenge woman. UM. But my 103 00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:03,880 Speaker 1: mother did better than the best that she could for 104 00:06:03,960 --> 00:06:05,680 Speaker 1: my brother and I. My brother and I grew up 105 00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:07,840 Speaker 1: in the same house. She was never married to my father, 106 00:06:07,880 --> 00:06:10,880 Speaker 1: and my brother and I had different fathers. UM. And 107 00:06:11,279 --> 00:06:14,279 Speaker 1: she you know, carded her two kids by herself off 108 00:06:14,279 --> 00:06:17,560 Speaker 1: to Atlanta in her twenties. UM. This was like an 109 00:06:19,120 --> 00:06:23,640 Speaker 1: and Um. She really just did her best to try 110 00:06:23,640 --> 00:06:26,640 Speaker 1: to provide a home for us. In doing that and 111 00:06:26,720 --> 00:06:28,680 Speaker 1: her her life and the way she grew up. My 112 00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:32,360 Speaker 1: mother was also an addict. She drank a lot, and 113 00:06:32,440 --> 00:06:35,800 Speaker 1: so so much. UM. Such a big part of her 114 00:06:36,120 --> 00:06:39,719 Speaker 1: drinking I think shaped me, um because it forced me 115 00:06:40,200 --> 00:06:44,120 Speaker 1: to grow up very quickly. It forced me to be brave, 116 00:06:44,440 --> 00:06:46,760 Speaker 1: right because there were incidents you know where it's like 117 00:06:46,760 --> 00:06:49,120 Speaker 1: I have to confront that. You know, my friend saw 118 00:06:49,160 --> 00:06:54,040 Speaker 1: my mother this way, UM, and it forced me um 119 00:06:54,080 --> 00:06:58,120 Speaker 1: to love you know, it forced me to love the 120 00:06:59,240 --> 00:07:01,400 Speaker 1: sinner and hate the sin, as they say in the 121 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:04,479 Speaker 1: old church. Now, the reason why I said earlier that 122 00:07:04,480 --> 00:07:08,599 Speaker 1: Tiffany was my kindred spirit is because you look, there's 123 00:07:08,680 --> 00:07:13,800 Speaker 1: something about a black woman on television working in a world, um, 124 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:18,000 Speaker 1: and using our very powerful voices and fighting against that 125 00:07:18,000 --> 00:07:20,120 Speaker 1: that narrative that we should not be heard because we 126 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:25,000 Speaker 1: were never intended to be heard. You immediately, UM, get 127 00:07:25,040 --> 00:07:28,000 Speaker 1: the same cuts and bruises and scars, and you've been 128 00:07:28,040 --> 00:07:31,520 Speaker 1: through the same battles. You know what it looks like. 129 00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,120 Speaker 1: Even if you don't even have to say it, we 130 00:07:33,160 --> 00:07:34,760 Speaker 1: can give each other a look and be like, girl, 131 00:07:35,200 --> 00:07:37,560 Speaker 1: you know what it is. I absolutely know what it is. 132 00:07:38,160 --> 00:07:41,840 Speaker 1: You know, different circumstances, different names, but I know what 133 00:07:41,960 --> 00:07:45,680 Speaker 1: it is. And so when Tiffany talks about where she 134 00:07:45,800 --> 00:07:49,440 Speaker 1: is now and how she has survived so much, it 135 00:07:49,520 --> 00:07:52,400 Speaker 1: really puts a smile on my face because it's just 136 00:07:52,560 --> 00:07:58,000 Speaker 1: another reinforcement of why we're so resilient and just so 137 00:07:58,240 --> 00:08:01,680 Speaker 1: damn magic. Who knows what my life would have been 138 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:04,400 Speaker 1: like had I grown up in this like you know, 139 00:08:04,520 --> 00:08:08,480 Speaker 1: the Huxtable households. You know, I think by being kind 140 00:08:08,480 --> 00:08:10,160 Speaker 1: of out there on my own at an early age. 141 00:08:10,160 --> 00:08:13,679 Speaker 1: I left home at sixteen, um, and I just couldn't, 142 00:08:13,720 --> 00:08:15,560 Speaker 1: you know, take being in that house anymore. And I 143 00:08:15,600 --> 00:08:20,280 Speaker 1: think having to navigate this place on my own um 144 00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:23,840 Speaker 1: at such a young age. It taught me now, I'm 145 00:08:23,880 --> 00:08:26,840 Speaker 1: so prepared for everything that that comes my way, from 146 00:08:27,000 --> 00:08:30,600 Speaker 1: corporate America UM to just people who try you. And 147 00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:33,280 Speaker 1: I know, you know, Harry, They're gonna be try you 148 00:08:33,320 --> 00:08:37,640 Speaker 1: along the way. And it's like you find that CARDI 149 00:08:37,720 --> 00:08:39,960 Speaker 1: b boys, like you're gonna do what to as you 150 00:08:40,040 --> 00:08:43,480 Speaker 1: survived so much already, you know. And sometimes I looked 151 00:08:43,480 --> 00:08:45,040 Speaker 1: at my left at my right, and I see the 152 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:47,360 Speaker 1: people sharing this space with me, and I had the 153 00:08:47,400 --> 00:08:49,360 Speaker 1: comfort of knowing what you did to get here and 154 00:08:49,400 --> 00:08:51,680 Speaker 1: what I did to get here. Our past look very different, 155 00:08:51,880 --> 00:08:53,520 Speaker 1: so I can weather this storm. I don't have a 156 00:08:53,520 --> 00:08:56,400 Speaker 1: brittle spirit, and I really credit my mother with that. 157 00:08:56,600 --> 00:09:00,520 Speaker 1: So Tiffany, as explained, was born in Ohio. She grew 158 00:09:00,559 --> 00:09:04,160 Speaker 1: up between Cleveland and Atlanta. She went to Clark Atlanta, 159 00:09:04,240 --> 00:09:07,400 Speaker 1: where she majored in mass communications at an emphasis and radio, 160 00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:11,800 Speaker 1: television and films. So her first job was a reporter 161 00:09:12,040 --> 00:09:15,000 Speaker 1: at an Atlanta radio station, which is great. UM. But 162 00:09:15,080 --> 00:09:16,560 Speaker 1: when I think of all the things that she's been 163 00:09:16,600 --> 00:09:20,240 Speaker 1: able to accomplish, her career trajectory is very similar to 164 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:21,920 Speaker 1: mine in the sense that you just work your way 165 00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:23,760 Speaker 1: up you get in where you fit into, you finally 166 00:09:23,800 --> 00:09:27,600 Speaker 1: find your footing, but more importantly your voice. Um. And 167 00:09:27,679 --> 00:09:33,000 Speaker 1: all the while, while we exceed professionally, personally, we we struggle. 168 00:09:33,800 --> 00:09:38,080 Speaker 1: And the struggle isn't like, um, you know, I I 169 00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:41,720 Speaker 1: can't feed my family struggle. The struggle is living in 170 00:09:41,760 --> 00:09:44,160 Speaker 1: these two worlds that I like to call two worlds 171 00:09:44,160 --> 00:09:46,520 Speaker 1: where we dip in and we dip out. Um. We 172 00:09:46,559 --> 00:09:51,280 Speaker 1: have this dynamic relationship with our parents, more specifically our mothers, 173 00:09:51,280 --> 00:09:54,360 Speaker 1: because that's what we're talking about. And and they too 174 00:09:54,400 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: had dreams, and they too wanted to do things that 175 00:09:57,040 --> 00:10:00,880 Speaker 1: they probably never imagined that they could. And then when 176 00:10:00,920 --> 00:10:04,360 Speaker 1: they watch us live a life that we quite frankly 177 00:10:04,400 --> 00:10:08,240 Speaker 1: could not predict but definitely feel entitled to now, especially 178 00:10:08,240 --> 00:10:12,160 Speaker 1: as as we work so hard. Um, there is this 179 00:10:13,440 --> 00:10:15,600 Speaker 1: for me. And I'm not speaking for Tiffany, but for me, 180 00:10:15,720 --> 00:10:20,880 Speaker 1: I am well aware of the resentment that that permeates 181 00:10:21,000 --> 00:10:27,000 Speaker 1: my relationship with my mother. Tiffany explains that a lot 182 00:10:27,040 --> 00:10:30,240 Speaker 1: of her success is because of her mother, but there 183 00:10:30,360 --> 00:10:34,000 Speaker 1: is always that part. And man, I mean when I 184 00:10:34,040 --> 00:10:36,880 Speaker 1: tell you this really wasn't an interview, it was more 185 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:41,080 Speaker 1: so therapy for me. Take a lesson. Truly, we really, 186 00:10:41,120 --> 00:10:44,559 Speaker 1: truly still struggle every day because even while I'm sitting 187 00:10:44,559 --> 00:10:46,880 Speaker 1: here and saying I made peace with it, I think 188 00:10:46,920 --> 00:10:49,760 Speaker 1: there are parts of our struggle that come out in 189 00:10:49,800 --> 00:10:53,040 Speaker 1: our conversation, um in my lack of patients. You know, 190 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:55,440 Speaker 1: I have a young mother, and I think my mother 191 00:10:55,559 --> 00:10:58,440 Speaker 1: still carries shame. There are times since she's around my 192 00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:01,440 Speaker 1: friends and you know, their mother, and she's describing this 193 00:11:01,600 --> 00:11:04,599 Speaker 1: childhood that sounds so foreign to me, like, oh, what 194 00:11:04,960 --> 00:11:07,800 Speaker 1: household was this? It's like I don't remember growing up 195 00:11:07,840 --> 00:11:10,240 Speaker 1: in that space. And it's not to say that every 196 00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:11,959 Speaker 1: day was a struggle. I mean we weren't eating out 197 00:11:12,000 --> 00:11:14,280 Speaker 1: the trash, you know. I mean she did things, but 198 00:11:14,679 --> 00:11:16,439 Speaker 1: it is nice to just you know, I think this 199 00:11:16,480 --> 00:11:19,120 Speaker 1: is the thing with parents where it's like you are 200 00:11:19,160 --> 00:11:22,120 Speaker 1: a reminder of their failures at times, and I think 201 00:11:22,280 --> 00:11:25,800 Speaker 1: I remind her of some of her failures, and so 202 00:11:26,080 --> 00:11:28,800 Speaker 1: because of that she can be uh we are are 203 00:11:28,880 --> 00:11:31,400 Speaker 1: We We struggle. But I try to take a breath 204 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:34,240 Speaker 1: and see my mother as a woman, because she's a woman. 205 00:11:34,280 --> 00:11:38,120 Speaker 1: Before she's my mother, she was somebody who was confronting 206 00:11:38,120 --> 00:11:41,199 Speaker 1: her own childhood trauma. You know, she had parents who 207 00:11:41,280 --> 00:11:44,080 Speaker 1: had trauma, and that informed the way they raised her. 208 00:11:44,160 --> 00:11:47,880 Speaker 1: So it's the generational trauma that so many of us endure, 209 00:11:47,960 --> 00:11:51,240 Speaker 1: but particularly black women. And the one thing that I've 210 00:11:51,240 --> 00:11:54,280 Speaker 1: realized is that we have our parents here for a 211 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:58,280 Speaker 1: finite amount of time, and regardless of how we felt 212 00:11:58,320 --> 00:12:01,840 Speaker 1: growing up and regardless of what challenges we had, parents 213 00:12:01,960 --> 00:12:05,120 Speaker 1: love their children. They do biologically, they are wired to 214 00:12:05,280 --> 00:12:08,720 Speaker 1: love you. That doesn't mean, UM, that they don't abandon 215 00:12:08,840 --> 00:12:11,560 Speaker 1: you in some ways that perhaps they're not even aware of, 216 00:12:11,800 --> 00:12:14,920 Speaker 1: or abandon you in word or indeed you know, um, 217 00:12:15,200 --> 00:12:17,920 Speaker 1: or do things that are debilitating to your spirit, like 218 00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:20,839 Speaker 1: all of Like my truth matters, My truth and how 219 00:12:20,840 --> 00:12:23,760 Speaker 1: I grew up matters. But I also honor the fact 220 00:12:23,800 --> 00:12:27,920 Speaker 1: that my mother is a flawed woman, UM, a flawed 221 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:30,840 Speaker 1: human being who did better than the best that she could. 222 00:12:31,200 --> 00:12:33,839 Speaker 1: I hope when Tiffany UM, here's this podcast and she 223 00:12:33,920 --> 00:12:37,560 Speaker 1: really understands therapy. It was full therapy for me and 224 00:12:37,640 --> 00:12:40,720 Speaker 1: every woman that is listening, every person listening for that matter, 225 00:12:40,760 --> 00:12:44,080 Speaker 1: but specifically for black women. UM. She gets into and 226 00:12:44,080 --> 00:12:48,360 Speaker 1: the conversation always evolves or maybe sometimes devolves into worthiness. 227 00:12:48,840 --> 00:12:54,559 Speaker 1: Are we worthy? Especially women who have been made from 228 00:12:54,800 --> 00:12:58,640 Speaker 1: their own, if you will, meaning self taught, self made. 229 00:12:58,760 --> 00:13:01,120 Speaker 1: I had some help along the way, but a lot 230 00:13:01,160 --> 00:13:03,280 Speaker 1: of what I have been able to accomplish I had 231 00:13:03,320 --> 00:13:07,600 Speaker 1: to figure out. There was no mentor walking me walking 232 00:13:07,679 --> 00:13:10,319 Speaker 1: side by side, rather saying this is how it works, scary, 233 00:13:10,559 --> 00:13:13,480 Speaker 1: avoid that pitfall, don't talk to that person, don't don't 234 00:13:13,520 --> 00:13:16,359 Speaker 1: sit in that room, move this way, move that way. 235 00:13:16,760 --> 00:13:21,079 Speaker 1: And we work so hard professionally to get it right 236 00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:24,959 Speaker 1: that personally sometimes we suffer. We suffer in our relationships 237 00:13:24,960 --> 00:13:27,360 Speaker 1: with our family, with our friends, with our significant others, 238 00:13:27,679 --> 00:13:30,600 Speaker 1: and we find ourselves much like we do in the workspace, 239 00:13:30,760 --> 00:13:36,520 Speaker 1: trying to prove ourselves. And Tiffany so elegantly and eloquently 240 00:13:36,760 --> 00:13:41,120 Speaker 1: explains why that's the problem, I think in so many 241 00:13:41,160 --> 00:13:43,679 Speaker 1: parts of my life and perhaps in yours as well 242 00:13:43,720 --> 00:13:46,600 Speaker 1: as trying to prove that I too am worthy of love, 243 00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:50,200 Speaker 1: I too am worthy of success, I too I deserve 244 00:13:50,320 --> 00:13:52,960 Speaker 1: the things I have in life. It's a constant conversation 245 00:13:53,000 --> 00:13:56,640 Speaker 1: I'm having with myself. Well, like with friendships, you know, 246 00:13:56,840 --> 00:14:00,120 Speaker 1: I had to um learn how to not take things, 247 00:14:00,120 --> 00:14:02,920 Speaker 1: not to take everything personally, you know, like everything was 248 00:14:02,960 --> 00:14:06,160 Speaker 1: not a personal attack on me um was men. You 249 00:14:06,200 --> 00:14:08,480 Speaker 1: know I had to learn that just from day one 250 00:14:08,600 --> 00:14:11,559 Speaker 1: off the cuff. I am deserving of good things. I 251 00:14:11,600 --> 00:14:15,400 Speaker 1: don't have to prove myself to you, you know. Um, 252 00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 1: I mean, I want to take us to church. But 253 00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:20,480 Speaker 1: the Bible says he who finds a wife finds a 254 00:14:20,520 --> 00:14:23,200 Speaker 1: good thing. But I used to I used to look 255 00:14:23,240 --> 00:14:26,440 Speaker 1: at it carry like you know, I like, look at 256 00:14:26,440 --> 00:14:29,000 Speaker 1: this package before you, and like look at everything like. 257 00:14:29,040 --> 00:14:31,400 Speaker 1: It took me until that was probably my mid thirties 258 00:14:31,440 --> 00:14:34,200 Speaker 1: before I realized, like, wait a second, y'all got the game. 259 00:14:34,280 --> 00:14:37,200 Speaker 1: Fuck up. I have the power here. And I think 260 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,520 Speaker 1: it all comes back to our our trauma and us 261 00:14:39,520 --> 00:14:42,960 Speaker 1: trying to prove ourselves for love. And it's something I 262 00:14:43,040 --> 00:14:46,360 Speaker 1: tried because I see these young girls, twentysomething teenagers, even 263 00:14:46,360 --> 00:14:49,600 Speaker 1: in early thirties. I think you see everybody like trying 264 00:14:49,640 --> 00:14:52,120 Speaker 1: to sell themselves, trying to push themselves, and it's like, 265 00:14:52,200 --> 00:14:55,320 Speaker 1: we have the power. We are the most powerful things 266 00:14:55,320 --> 00:14:57,440 Speaker 1: on the planet. Don't let these men make you think 267 00:14:57,640 --> 00:15:00,240 Speaker 1: is money. Money is not the power what we God 268 00:15:00,280 --> 00:15:02,000 Speaker 1: will make a man go out and get some money. 269 00:15:02,160 --> 00:15:04,120 Speaker 1: They will crawl over hot stone to get to us. 270 00:15:04,480 --> 00:15:07,360 Speaker 1: But when you don't feel that just as you alone, 271 00:15:07,480 --> 00:15:10,680 Speaker 1: regardless of your occupation, regardless of how small your waist is, 272 00:15:10,720 --> 00:15:13,480 Speaker 1: how big your ass is, none of that matters. When 273 00:15:13,520 --> 00:15:16,360 Speaker 1: you believe you alone are enough and are worthy and 274 00:15:16,400 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 1: are deserving of all the things coming at you in life, 275 00:15:20,160 --> 00:15:22,880 Speaker 1: your life changes. You know, I have to start operating 276 00:15:22,920 --> 00:15:25,200 Speaker 1: as though the universe was silted in my favor, and 277 00:15:25,200 --> 00:15:27,600 Speaker 1: I had to start operating as though I deserve all 278 00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:29,680 Speaker 1: the things. All my problems came from a place of 279 00:15:29,760 --> 00:15:34,160 Speaker 1: thinking I don't deserve it. Every champion and carey Chappion 280 00:15:34,200 --> 00:15:36,000 Speaker 1: is to be a champion out of Chappi and they 281 00:15:36,080 --> 00:15:38,680 Speaker 1: carry Chappi, and they carry chappiut of Chappi and and 282 00:15:38,800 --> 00:15:42,280 Speaker 1: carry Chappion and carry Chappi, and then the team a 283 00:15:42,400 --> 00:15:49,080 Speaker 1: connect and warm. Every Chappion and carry Chappion is to 284 00:15:49,160 --> 00:15:51,560 Speaker 1: be a Champi out of Chappi and they carry Chappi, 285 00:15:51,600 --> 00:15:54,240 Speaker 1: and they can chepy got Chappi and they carry Chappi 286 00:15:54,320 --> 00:15:57,480 Speaker 1: and they carry Chappi, and then the team can make 287 00:15:57,520 --> 00:16:01,080 Speaker 1: it work. And so here where I stand on the 288 00:16:01,120 --> 00:16:05,120 Speaker 1: shoulders of so many who came before me, hosting a 289 00:16:05,160 --> 00:16:09,120 Speaker 1: show that is designed with you and mind. This is 290 00:16:09,200 --> 00:16:12,920 Speaker 1: your home. If you've watched cable news shows and yelled 291 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:15,360 Speaker 1: at the TV because you're not hearing your voice or 292 00:16:15,400 --> 00:16:18,720 Speaker 1: your lived experience reflected, this is a show for you. 293 00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:22,080 Speaker 1: If you've been angry that so many of these political 294 00:16:22,160 --> 00:16:26,160 Speaker 1: discussions are being led by people waxing poetic and nostalgic 295 00:16:26,200 --> 00:16:29,240 Speaker 1: about a country that never existed. For you, you have 296 00:16:29,320 --> 00:16:32,760 Speaker 1: found a home here. If you get lost in the acronyms, 297 00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:36,520 Speaker 1: the insular inside baseball chatter that may sometimes fly over 298 00:16:36,560 --> 00:16:40,040 Speaker 1: your head on cable news panels, ride with me because 299 00:16:40,080 --> 00:16:44,400 Speaker 1: I am always writing for you. I understand you because 300 00:16:44,440 --> 00:16:49,200 Speaker 1: I am you. So in a world where we are 301 00:16:49,560 --> 00:16:51,760 Speaker 1: we and this is an episode just from my sister 302 00:16:51,840 --> 00:16:54,080 Speaker 1: is because clearly you can tell she's talking to us. 303 00:16:54,080 --> 00:16:55,880 Speaker 1: And in a world where we are often told what 304 00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:59,600 Speaker 1: we are not this, this podcast for me, was a 305 00:16:59,600 --> 00:17:02,080 Speaker 1: beautiful reminder of what we are and what we have 306 00:17:02,160 --> 00:17:06,960 Speaker 1: accomplished and where we can go. Tiffany Um is blessed 307 00:17:07,359 --> 00:17:11,359 Speaker 1: and she deserves every single thing she has right now. 308 00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:14,320 Speaker 1: And it's always funny to me when when people pop 309 00:17:14,400 --> 00:17:16,240 Speaker 1: up on the scene, especially in the TV scene, and 310 00:17:16,280 --> 00:17:18,600 Speaker 1: you're like, where'd you come from? You're an overnight success 311 00:17:19,040 --> 00:17:21,000 Speaker 1: and you're like, oh, but it only took ten years 312 00:17:21,040 --> 00:17:23,840 Speaker 1: to get here. She's been working, She's been doing this 313 00:17:23,920 --> 00:17:27,040 Speaker 1: for a very long time. So to hear her talk 314 00:17:27,160 --> 00:17:30,840 Speaker 1: about um where she is in life, her her confidence, 315 00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:34,399 Speaker 1: and her need to be around other strong women to 316 00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:37,640 Speaker 1: help uplift her and build her is a beautiful thing. 317 00:17:38,320 --> 00:17:42,919 Speaker 1: And it is also a word for me, because it 318 00:17:42,960 --> 00:17:45,119 Speaker 1: really does make a difference. When you have a group 319 00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:48,680 Speaker 1: of women protecting you, like your tribe holding you down. 320 00:17:49,119 --> 00:17:54,119 Speaker 1: There is no other feeling. This is not mine. The 321 00:17:54,160 --> 00:17:58,760 Speaker 1: great Mrs Carter said this. I do enjoy men very much, 322 00:17:59,080 --> 00:18:02,040 Speaker 1: but there is a thing like a conversation with a 323 00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:06,439 Speaker 1: woman who understands me. And I find solace in this 324 00:18:06,680 --> 00:18:12,880 Speaker 1: circle of women who um just I know, like men 325 00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:15,040 Speaker 1: are not telling me like, damn take me you so fine, 326 00:18:15,119 --> 00:18:17,320 Speaker 1: or damn you so beautiful, you gorgeous? Are you so smart? 327 00:18:17,359 --> 00:18:19,560 Speaker 1: You're so dope? You know they might, you know, but 328 00:18:19,960 --> 00:18:22,720 Speaker 1: when my sisters tell me that, like, I feel so 329 00:18:22,840 --> 00:18:27,280 Speaker 1: empowered and sharing that space together, and you know, I 330 00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:31,240 Speaker 1: think we recognize each other, right, Queens recognize a queen. 331 00:18:31,320 --> 00:18:34,120 Speaker 1: And I remember watching you and Jamaal talk about your 332 00:18:34,119 --> 00:18:36,720 Speaker 1: friendship and your insecurities and how y'all came together And 333 00:18:36,760 --> 00:18:38,480 Speaker 1: I was like, can I trust their you know? I 334 00:18:38,480 --> 00:18:41,639 Speaker 1: don't know? And how you all your sisters now you know? 335 00:18:42,000 --> 00:18:46,000 Speaker 1: And I feel like I approached women with that same 336 00:18:46,040 --> 00:18:48,760 Speaker 1: spirited sisterhood. You know, Carrie, when you walk into a 337 00:18:48,880 --> 00:18:51,640 Speaker 1: room and it's a room full of women, a room 338 00:18:51,640 --> 00:18:54,600 Speaker 1: full of black women, it's a spirit in there that 339 00:18:54,680 --> 00:18:57,879 Speaker 1: it's unlike any other. You take one outsider and put 340 00:18:58,000 --> 00:19:00,000 Speaker 1: them in the room, the energy change. So I am 341 00:19:00,080 --> 00:19:02,920 Speaker 1: race those moments of women because they do really help 342 00:19:03,000 --> 00:19:06,480 Speaker 1: me feed my spirit, give me confidence when I slip 343 00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,639 Speaker 1: and fall, because I'm not afraid to fall. I'm afraid 344 00:19:08,680 --> 00:19:11,119 Speaker 1: to fail. I'm not afraid to fall when I slip 345 00:19:11,160 --> 00:19:12,919 Speaker 1: and fall, to know I can come back to this 346 00:19:13,000 --> 00:19:15,200 Speaker 1: space and say, Hey, I thoughped up today. What do 347 00:19:15,240 --> 00:19:17,160 Speaker 1: you all think? Harry? I feel like if I did 348 00:19:17,200 --> 00:19:20,880 Speaker 1: something completely embarrassing, I feel like I con text you like, hey, 349 00:19:20,920 --> 00:19:27,040 Speaker 1: can I talk to you? So, in the interest of 350 00:19:27,080 --> 00:19:31,120 Speaker 1: full disclosure, I must say I have never met Tiffany. 351 00:19:31,280 --> 00:19:33,360 Speaker 1: When I did this podcast, I had never met her. 352 00:19:33,520 --> 00:19:36,720 Speaker 1: We we had been on her show, we have talked 353 00:19:36,760 --> 00:19:39,159 Speaker 1: about how great she was, We've given her shoutouts from 354 00:19:39,200 --> 00:19:41,639 Speaker 1: our show. Um. And then when I talked to her, 355 00:19:41,640 --> 00:19:44,240 Speaker 1: I was like, oh, sister, like this is it. We're friends. 356 00:19:44,640 --> 00:19:46,680 Speaker 1: You feel that way about certain people, and for me, 357 00:19:46,800 --> 00:19:49,560 Speaker 1: specifically for me, because Jamal will tell you, I am 358 00:19:49,640 --> 00:19:51,920 Speaker 1: queen of who are gonna be there? Who are gonna 359 00:19:51,920 --> 00:19:55,159 Speaker 1: be here? Come over? M hmmm, I'm coming. Who are 360 00:19:55,240 --> 00:19:58,840 Speaker 1: gonna be there? Now? I'll miss I'm gonna miss that event, yeah, 361 00:19:58,920 --> 00:20:02,160 Speaker 1: because I that's to p action thing that I do. Um. 362 00:20:02,200 --> 00:20:04,840 Speaker 1: But when Tiffany called me a few days later and said, hey, 363 00:20:04,840 --> 00:20:07,040 Speaker 1: I'll be in l A. I'd love to catch up. 364 00:20:07,720 --> 00:20:10,840 Speaker 1: I threw a dinner party, y'all. I had people over 365 00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,760 Speaker 1: I never had in my house before. I felt very 366 00:20:12,760 --> 00:20:16,720 Speaker 1: good about it because listen, who all gonna be there? 367 00:20:16,760 --> 00:20:18,040 Speaker 1: Who all want to come? I don't know if you 368 00:20:18,080 --> 00:20:20,439 Speaker 1: can come? And so I got a room together of 369 00:20:20,560 --> 00:20:23,840 Speaker 1: some really dope women. UM. And mind you, this was 370 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,160 Speaker 1: going to be the very first time I've ever met Tiffany. 371 00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:29,120 Speaker 1: So it was Tiffany, Jamal, you know that's my book. 372 00:20:29,200 --> 00:20:33,800 Speaker 1: My friend Kelly Carter, Um I had. I had invited 373 00:20:33,800 --> 00:20:36,680 Speaker 1: a couple of different people. Joey Brown from Cultural Creators 374 00:20:36,720 --> 00:20:38,720 Speaker 1: was there. I thought it was really super nice to 375 00:20:38,760 --> 00:20:43,560 Speaker 1: have her there. Um and Angela Rye. I really am 376 00:20:43,560 --> 00:20:46,720 Speaker 1: my friend Monique. I really was surprised at the group 377 00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:48,520 Speaker 1: that I could get together. But it was the perfect 378 00:20:48,520 --> 00:20:51,040 Speaker 1: group because at most of the women in the room 379 00:20:51,040 --> 00:20:52,800 Speaker 1: had written a book or started to write a book, 380 00:20:52,840 --> 00:20:54,960 Speaker 1: and they were talking about that. They were talking about life, 381 00:20:55,000 --> 00:20:57,639 Speaker 1: and then we got real, real, honest just about everything, 382 00:20:58,480 --> 00:21:01,000 Speaker 1: and my gut was right, is love Tiffany, And I 383 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:04,359 Speaker 1: was so um grateful that she was so open and 384 00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:08,400 Speaker 1: honest and willing to share with us um some gems, 385 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:12,480 Speaker 1: as she has done here. But the overall message was this, 386 00:21:12,640 --> 00:21:16,320 Speaker 1: for me, my biggest takeaway, I am quick to shut 387 00:21:16,359 --> 00:21:18,719 Speaker 1: shut down, I am quick to be like I am 388 00:21:18,760 --> 00:21:21,840 Speaker 1: hanging out with nobody, but who I know? No new friends. 389 00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:25,359 Speaker 1: Drake actually got that for me, Um, and I often 390 00:21:25,400 --> 00:21:28,639 Speaker 1: pride myself in saying no new friends. But the reality is, 391 00:21:30,080 --> 00:21:33,159 Speaker 1: it would be nice to be more open. It is 392 00:21:33,359 --> 00:21:38,120 Speaker 1: nice to be more not even loving, because I consider 393 00:21:38,160 --> 00:21:42,000 Speaker 1: myself loving, but it would be nice to approach people 394 00:21:42,200 --> 00:21:47,240 Speaker 1: without thinking there was something else, some ulterior motive, some 395 00:21:47,400 --> 00:21:51,879 Speaker 1: nefarious scheme happening. You know, it would be nice to 396 00:21:52,000 --> 00:21:54,919 Speaker 1: believe that people just wanted to rock with you and 397 00:21:54,960 --> 00:21:56,920 Speaker 1: they had nothing else to do but to say great 398 00:21:56,960 --> 00:22:00,600 Speaker 1: things and uplift you. And that was my big takeaway. 399 00:22:00,680 --> 00:22:04,520 Speaker 1: Tiffany Cross brought me that. And if that is not invaluable, 400 00:22:04,560 --> 00:22:07,359 Speaker 1: if that's not a gem to walk away with now, listen. 401 00:22:08,119 --> 00:22:10,960 Speaker 1: She also helped me feel like I need to treat 402 00:22:11,000 --> 00:22:14,360 Speaker 1: my mother more human esque, like a human, not just 403 00:22:14,480 --> 00:22:17,880 Speaker 1: a robot who birthed me. That that's also a gem. 404 00:22:18,040 --> 00:22:21,399 Speaker 1: But she brought some light into my life, which to me, 405 00:22:22,280 --> 00:22:25,760 Speaker 1: his full circle in the sense of that is why 406 00:22:26,080 --> 00:22:29,160 Speaker 1: she has been put in this position, that is why 407 00:22:29,359 --> 00:22:33,240 Speaker 1: we're watching her to take off. Literally got a rocket 408 00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:38,159 Speaker 1: on her back, and I couldnot be more then proud 409 00:22:38,200 --> 00:22:41,160 Speaker 1: to call her a friend. And I love watching this journey. 410 00:22:41,240 --> 00:22:44,679 Speaker 1: So I hope you all feel uplifted. Go out and 411 00:22:44,720 --> 00:22:49,040 Speaker 1: make a new friend. Take that staink face off. Black ladies, 412 00:22:49,640 --> 00:22:53,000 Speaker 1: go and smile. Don't lead with no because we queen 413 00:22:53,040 --> 00:22:56,040 Speaker 1: and no. Hey, you want to know guy, walk up 414 00:22:56,080 --> 00:22:58,640 Speaker 1: to each other holler no, I was just gonna tell 415 00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:00,359 Speaker 1: you that you dropped your purse. You want me to 416 00:23:00,359 --> 00:23:06,120 Speaker 1: pick it up? No, I'll pick it up, damn it. Um, 417 00:23:06,359 --> 00:23:09,320 Speaker 1: I'm talking about myself that may not be y'all. Thank 418 00:23:09,320 --> 00:23:12,080 Speaker 1: you after hanging out with me. I really appreciate it. 419 00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,479 Speaker 1: Speaking of Nose, I'm gonna go talk to my producer 420 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:16,520 Speaker 1: Trouble right now. She h like I mean, her whole 421 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:19,160 Speaker 1: energy is one big fat no or I don't care. 422 00:23:19,880 --> 00:23:22,119 Speaker 1: I'm working on her. I hope this podcast got in 423 00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:25,440 Speaker 1: her spirit today. We'll be back next week.