Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you wanna way back home?
Speaker 2: Either way we want to be there, doesn't matter how
Speaker 2: much baggage you claim and give us time and they
Speaker 2: turman on and gay.
Speaker 3: We want to send you off instide.
Speaker 4: Do you wanna welcome you back home?
Speaker 5: Tell us all about it?
Speaker 1: We scared her?
Speaker 3: Was it fine?
Speaker 6: Now?
Speaker 1: Porn?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do your need ride?
Speaker 4: Do with Karen and Chris.
Speaker 5: Welcome? Do you need a ride?
Speaker 1: This is Chris Fairbanks and this is Karen gil Gareff.
Speaker 5: We are going to pick up Whitmer Thomas.
Speaker 1: You know Whitmer Tall, blonde, young, free.
Speaker 3: Handsome, agile, innocent, worldly, talented.
Speaker 5: Thoughtful, Southern.
Speaker 1: Round glasses.
Speaker 5: Sometimes he wears round glasses that would have that's that
Speaker 5: signifies the end of the list, because that's the last
Speaker 5: thing I'm going to mention.
Speaker 1: That's it.
Speaker 3: And also he could take those off and then you'd
Speaker 3: be like, I don't know who the fuck this guy is?
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, good thing. There was all those other describing
Speaker 5: where it's prior to these glasses that are are not
Speaker 5: as important as thoughtful and some of the other things
Speaker 5: we are.
Speaker 1: Saying, they're not. It's not a quality of a person.
Speaker 3: That's just an accessory, right, It's not superficial.
Speaker 5: It's quantity of people that we're looking for.
Speaker 3: We'd want people with as many qualities quantity wise as possible.
Speaker 5: No, I'm saying I want fatties.
Speaker 1: Dare you?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 5: But me?
Speaker 1: Clearly we haven't worked together in a while.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Karen, how are you?
Speaker 1: Chris? I miss you. I miss us me too.
Speaker 3: You know, we have a good thing with this podcast,
Speaker 3: and it's very hard to do.
Speaker 5: It is hard to do.
Speaker 3: I wish, uh, we might want to consider bringing a
Speaker 3: car into a studio and recording in an inside a
Speaker 3: car in a studio from now on.
Speaker 5: For those of you, I know there's a lot of
Speaker 5: podcasts out there for people to People have to decide
Speaker 5: what to listen to and just know that the other
Speaker 5: ones that you listen to maybe before are ours. It's uh,
Speaker 5: they're easier to reck. I'm having a lot of trouble
Speaker 5: talking sometimes, I just do.
Speaker 1: And we love about you.
Speaker 5: I'm gonna accept that about myself. It is what I
Speaker 5: hate about myself.
Speaker 1: Though, Oh I wish that wasn't true.
Speaker 5: I've been watching the show I'm hosting, and so to
Speaker 5: see combine my weird muppet voice that snubbles over the
Speaker 5: simplest of words. I just I bit my tongue just
Speaker 5: now saying simplest. I bit the side of my tongue.
Speaker 1: I thought you're saying samplest I.
Speaker 5: Maybe wouldn't it be funny if I had some allergic
Speaker 5: reaction where my tongue always has been a little bigger
Speaker 5: than it's supposed to be.
Speaker 3: Maybe like you're caught like you always had a beasting
Speaker 3: in your tongue.
Speaker 5: Yeah, well I talk like I have a mouthful of bees.
Speaker 1: Dude, it's a very green mile.
Speaker 5: I don't know, it's a.
Speaker 6: Oh.
Speaker 5: I never I never really watched that movie close enough
Speaker 5: to figure out why he was vomiting swarms of bees.
Speaker 1: Because he was holy. He was maybe a big black cheese.
Speaker 5: That's why I didn't watch the movie.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because you hate stuff like that.
Speaker 5: I don't. I don't. I don't shove to your agenda
Speaker 5: down my throat. Tom Hanks, yeah, or big.
Speaker 1: Tall guy Michael whatever, who died, Oh he died.
Speaker 5: He died in real life.
Speaker 1: He died of bees.
Speaker 5: Oh, what a horrible coincidence. I hope they're hilarious. I
Speaker 5: hope they weren't movie bees. Or but what if he
Speaker 5: died watching the.
Speaker 1: B movie A little bee? Jerry Seinfeld in his mouth,
Speaker 1: get out of here?
Speaker 5: What's the deal with you not breathing? After this? Sting?
Speaker 5: Oh no, and.
Speaker 3: Then stings there singing the last song of the credits.
Speaker 5: Oh but but yeah. I've been watching all host genius
Speaker 5: at showing Host, and my face is swollen. I have
Speaker 5: trouble talking. So today all I'm saying is I'm going
Speaker 5: to try my hardest to enunciate and speak clearly. And
Speaker 5: in the beginning here you saw it, you heard and
Speaker 5: you saw it. If you were looking at me, I
Speaker 5: stumbled over a couple of words.
Speaker 1: I can't look at you.
Speaker 5: It's please, don't nobody look at me. Don't look at
Speaker 5: me after If you ever seen me perform live, as
Speaker 5: I lead the stage and leave the building, please do
Speaker 5: not make eye contact. That's one of the only things
Speaker 5: I ask.
Speaker 3: And at the top of your set every time, you
Speaker 3: always scream, don't look at me at the audience.
Speaker 5: It thanks for It's hard, it's it's a difficult way
Speaker 5: to do stand up, but it's my only the only
Speaker 5: thing on my writer is that the audience shouldn't look
Speaker 5: at me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like your it's like your hook. And then
Speaker 3: people go like that are punk rock? They're like, I
Speaker 3: totally look at him the whole time.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Yeah, And it's like it's like the people that
Speaker 5: talk and throw bread during Neil Hamburger.
Speaker 1: Are you thinking of ducks and upon?
Speaker 5: I think I'm thinking of Rocky horror picture show or
Speaker 5: ducks in a pond?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 3: But you have been very busy with a full time
Speaker 3: fucking TV show that I am friends with ap April,
Speaker 3: which and she tells me the details, and it seems
Speaker 3: horrifically long hours.
Speaker 5: It is, it's just not that often. If it was
Speaker 5: something where we are doing it every single day rather
Speaker 5: than a couple of times a week, I think I
Speaker 5: would be exhausted and hunch backed and wrinkly and grump
Speaker 5: quick to anger, gray haired, living in a you know,
Speaker 5: I probably live in a nicer place, I guess. Actually,
Speaker 5: the more I think if I was working more anyway,
Speaker 5: The point is it is when we're doing it very tiresome.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it seems like it, but it's been fun.
Speaker 5: But I yeah, again, I really I just watch myself
Speaker 5: and I'm like, get it together, mushmouth.
Speaker 3: I know, but I have to say, especially for somebody,
Speaker 3: I know that I do it to myself. I can't
Speaker 3: stand anything I hear or see of myself for many reasons.
Speaker 1: I don't think we're really supposed to.
Speaker 3: I think the people that like themselves and are fans themselves.
Speaker 1: Are horrible people.
Speaker 6: So no.
Speaker 3: I think the truly talented are repulsed by their own
Speaker 3: image and always are holding themselves to a higher expectation
Speaker 3: that they can never meet.
Speaker 5: There's there's something that happens on this podcast where someone
Speaker 5: listening probably thinks I'm being a rude asshole. But oftentimes
Speaker 5: when I go down to check the levels, or I
Speaker 5: text our guest and of course my phone isn't working.
Speaker 5: Perhaps my service got turned off. Oh you're saying something
Speaker 5: important usually during that moment, and I leave you hanging.
Speaker 1: Uh. Here's the thing, though, it's just not.
Speaker 5: Sending oh do you want to get technology? Give me
Speaker 5: the numb Okay, it did send. It's just where you're
Speaker 5: in a mountainous. I don't know where we are, but.
Speaker 1: By a huge old church.
Speaker 5: If we go up ahead and pull into this beautiful
Speaker 5: little home that Witmer lives behind. It's got to be
Speaker 5: on the National Historic Registry registry. Good god, I need
Speaker 5: just a therapist to see house on a hill. It's gorgeous.
Speaker 5: What a look at this house?
Speaker 1: Should we just be down at the bottom.
Speaker 5: I don't know. I would say that's him silhouette? So
Speaker 5: look at his swagger? Look at his style?
Speaker 1: Does he not?
Speaker 5: He should have a coat.
Speaker 7: I wish I knew how to roll down the window.
Speaker 7: You need you should be wearing a coat. Oh, we're
Speaker 7: going to hit the curt Oh there he is, Whitmer.
Speaker 5: Hello, how are you? There's a microphone by your bottom,
Speaker 5: and my purse is over there too, so don't be
Speaker 5: looking through that. Yeah, touch it and slam it up
Speaker 5: towards your pie. Is it? It's a class microphone? It is,
Speaker 5: thank you.
Speaker 1: Cool house in front of your house.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that's that I live in a like this backhouse
Speaker 6: above the garage, and that that house is one of
Speaker 6: the first houses in l A.
Speaker 5: No, that's I said, didn't I say? That's got to
Speaker 5: be on the Historic registery that home?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 6: And it was moved the guy who owns that property
Speaker 6: that I lived on, it was he moved all of
Speaker 6: those different houses because he's some cool millionaire guy. Wow,
Speaker 6: I guess grew up across the street.
Speaker 5: Is your mic? How's your mic?
Speaker 4: Is it?
Speaker 5: Is it in your mouth? Face?
Speaker 6: Yeah? My voice doesn't carry very well.
Speaker 5: Well I got there's always I'm not getting him very well.
Speaker 5: But all right now, oh pretty much better? Yes, the
Speaker 5: right way?
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, okay, we are.
Speaker 5: Sorry, but I always, I always.
Speaker 6: Eventually you'll get on the one tin if you just
Speaker 6: stay on.
Speaker 5: This road.
Speaker 1: And then up the one one.
Speaker 6: Yeah, you'll go the one tin to the one O one. Okay,
Speaker 6: don't performing on this show.
Speaker 5: Oh I don't do stand up anymore. It's oh really
Speaker 5: he's lying. Wait, you are performing? I'm not. No, I have,
Speaker 5: I've been. I have been performing though I did just
Speaker 5: last night, just a couple shows, so I have to
Speaker 5: night off. As long as it averages out, i'd say,
Speaker 5: and maybe correct me if I'm wrong. Well it's not.
Speaker 5: It's an opinion, so don't correct me. It's my opinion.
Speaker 5: With you're always jumping down my throat with this stuff.
Speaker 5: I'm sorry. I promised you I wouldn't fight our guests.
Speaker 5: I always, you know me. It's a'm morning radio style.
Speaker 5: I get in there and I really start throwing punches.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Always, But I'd say if you go up three or
Speaker 5: four times a week, you're doing your job. Oh yeah,
Speaker 5: thank you for agreeing. A god knows what would happen
Speaker 5: had you not.
Speaker 1: Conflict.
Speaker 5: Yeah, and do you know Karen very well? Have you
Speaker 5: guys piled around?
Speaker 6: Yeah, we piled around. I've drawn drawn a picture of her.
Speaker 6: We had a running bit at our old Power Violence
Speaker 6: show where everybody where Buddy was madly in love with Karen.
Speaker 6: And I mean he is in real life actually madly
Speaker 6: in love.
Speaker 5: Oh wow.
Speaker 6: But we would compete for her.
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 6: Really? Uh you know sincere Way.
Speaker 1: Witt wrote me a song. Yeah, I just found the
Speaker 1: lyrics to that song the other day when I was
Speaker 1: cleaning up.
Speaker 5: Oh really, you gave her the lyrics sheet. That's sweet.
Speaker 6: I must have.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he sang it and then you gave I think
Speaker 3: I ended up with it.
Speaker 1: And that picture of the Buddy drew me.
Speaker 3: That's that looks like it's from a mental hospital.
Speaker 1: It's so hilariously. Oh, it's just hilarious.
Speaker 5: Is when you say new Power Violence Show, have you
Speaker 5: guys left that we look at that place.
Speaker 6: We don't do the shows often now, Yeah, eventually you'll
Speaker 6: get on the one tin, which is like it kind
Speaker 6: of sneaks up on you.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Oh, all these exits, it's it's they are so horrifying. Yeah.
Speaker 6: First I heard this was the first freeway ever built.
Speaker 5: Yes, there's a lot of first la first right. Yeah,
Speaker 5: what you're gonna want to do is uh to get
Speaker 5: to We're gonna take the first freeway ever and go
Speaker 5: to the first house ever and that's that's where I live.
Speaker 5: This is rat Now everyone's gonna know where you live.
Speaker 5: They're gonna look up, do the research.
Speaker 6: Now I am. I'm freaked by this freeway.
Speaker 5: It's horrifying, ridiculous.
Speaker 6: They the I guess cars only went twenty miles an
Speaker 6: hour when I was built. So yeah, they give you
Speaker 6: no time to exit. It's an accident on it every day.
Speaker 1: Yes, and the stop signs.
Speaker 3: That's the funniest thing to me is that you get
Speaker 3: out what I just ran it because my car can't
Speaker 3: get going fast enough.
Speaker 1: Like you.
Speaker 3: You come from a stop and then try to get
Speaker 3: onto oak.
Speaker 5: Karen drives a car from the twenties.
Speaker 1: She does it is the Model A.
Speaker 5: It's beautiful, it's classic it's the cars on the historic Registry.
Speaker 5: There's no temporary lane. Like when you enter this freeway,
Speaker 5: there's no temporary lane. You It is diagonally right into
Speaker 5: what LA treats as the auto bond. People go really
Speaker 5: fast on this because it's like, hey, there's no rules
Speaker 5: over here. On the windy old one ten. There's not
Speaker 5: even a shoulder to get pulled over onto exactly, So
Speaker 5: no one gets pulled over because there's no shoulder.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's waw less. I like living living on the
Speaker 6: edge like that, Beau.
Speaker 1: You's such a nice neighborhood.
Speaker 5: You live in Zoo. It's beautiful.
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, thanks, that's I've lived probably in every little
Speaker 6: area of LA, and so far this is my favorite one.
Speaker 5: I noticed you had some uh, some fast and furious
Speaker 5: driver types going. It's at a normal thing.
Speaker 6: Yeah, the that street at night especially, people are just
Speaker 6: cruising because they're getting off of the one thirty four,
Speaker 6: which is up you know, and they're just still in
Speaker 6: freeway mode. And the before we get to my house,
Speaker 6: the street is wider, so people are going as.
Speaker 5: Fast as Oh okay, so they weren't necessarily that. I
Speaker 5: saw some guys with spoilers though, I think they they
Speaker 5: were sport driving.
Speaker 6: Yeah, maybe they weren't. I mean park Oh, so you
Speaker 6: know there's a lot of a lot of those street drivers.
Speaker 5: So back to the power. Where's the new power?
Speaker 6: Oh, now it's at the satellite. Oh the satellite. That
Speaker 6: place is great. Yeah, it's okay, it's fun. It's different.
Speaker 6: It's not as it's much more i'd say curated in venue.
Speaker 6: In venue, yes, people have to pay to go. We
Speaker 6: only have a couple of comedians. It's not as i'd say,
Speaker 6: it's not as friendly as the other place, as in,
Speaker 6: if the show now has to be a thing that
Speaker 6: you know, the satellite won't get bummed out by. Right,
Speaker 6: it's not good. So we have to think about it
Speaker 6: a lot more. And it's not as fun of a
Speaker 6: hang for me as it was. But also it's a
Speaker 6: lot less pressure in the way that I don't get
Speaker 6: as many you know, people being mad at me or
Speaker 6: something right every week. I don't know that.
Speaker 5: I can only imagine, oh, I haven't done your show
Speaker 5: for a while. That must mean we have beef.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that you're mad, I mean, And usually what it
Speaker 6: means is, no, you're just another white guy, and that's
Speaker 6: we've got enough. That's why I don't get mad when
Speaker 6: I don't get booked on shows.
Speaker 1: So many comedians.
Speaker 6: Yeah, there really is. What would Chris and I like
Speaker 6: if Chris wasn't an artist slash skateboarder and I wasn't
Speaker 6: a I guess, uh, just straight up skateboarder, a skateboarder actor,
Speaker 6: skateboarder actors.
Speaker 3: I saw you in that short film what was it
Speaker 3: called the Boyfriend.
Speaker 6: My Daughter's boyfriend?
Speaker 5: Oh your pool side a.
Speaker 6: Lot, yeah, poolside creepy boyfriend.
Speaker 5: Man. I like that. I like the kitchen scene. I
Speaker 5: thought you were good in the kitchen.
Speaker 6: Oh thanks, Yeah, that was Joe. I would like to
Speaker 6: take credit for it, but the guy wrote and directed that.
Speaker 6: Joey Izzo is just like very talented, and I definitely
Speaker 6: was his puppet. You know.
Speaker 1: So that's good.
Speaker 5: Well that's that's that's called directing.
Speaker 6: Yeah, he's a very good he's a very good director.
Speaker 3: Mand acting, you have to be a client as an.
Speaker 1: Actor, you will.
Speaker 5: Did you guys know that when Buddy I think he's
Speaker 5: lost some weight, but at one point he was like
Speaker 5: three hundred pounds and I lifted him up on my shoulders.
Speaker 6: Oh, I've got a picture of that. Yeah, that was
Speaker 6: squatted him.
Speaker 5: I'm very What people don't know about me, Karen, I'm
Speaker 5: very strong, even though my legs are little and one
Speaker 5: of the hips needs to be replaced. There's just so
Speaker 5: much power there and it really comes to no use.
Speaker 5: And tell him lifting a friend. So he's standing. I crouched,
Speaker 5: so I'm lifting with my back. Also, you're not supposed
Speaker 5: to do that. And I just put my head right
Speaker 5: by his balls and I just I just stand up.
Speaker 5: I stood up with him.
Speaker 6: I did it. A lot of people took photos and
Speaker 6: it was a fun, magical night.
Speaker 5: That was a long time ago, and it's probably the best,
Speaker 5: the last best time I've had.
Speaker 6: And then after that we went to some diner by
Speaker 6: Andy Wood's house and Buddy fell asleep while eating pancakes,
Speaker 6: sitting up like.
Speaker 3: Steve in real life, real life.
Speaker 6: Yeah, just fell asleep while eating them, sitting straight up.
Speaker 6: And then everybody took pictures of that. No, that's I
Speaker 6: missed that. I feel like we were like fourteen and
Speaker 6: that sap.
Speaker 5: It was a long time ago. Yeah, it seemed like
Speaker 5: everyone was young.
Speaker 6: Oh wait, well you stayed the right Sorry, sorry, sorry, sir,
Speaker 6: that it's Okay, it's okay, it's confusing.
Speaker 1: I panicked, It's okay.
Speaker 5: We Uh. One night I went into Norms and it
Speaker 5: was it's gonna be hard to describe, but I made.
Speaker 5: My vines are wildly popular. I think this one got
Speaker 5: four likes. But uh. I walked in and there was
Speaker 5: a man, an older man, and his hair was kind
Speaker 5: of all Bernie sandersy and he was just laying literally
Speaker 5: with his face on his plate. And I was laughing
Speaker 5: at that. And then I panned over and some other
Speaker 5: man who's not even related to him or friends with him,
Speaker 5: was also sleeping on his plate. Wow, it was two
Speaker 5: different So I just did a vine of like where
Speaker 5: I'm recording that guy, ha ha, that's is funny. And
Speaker 5: then pan over and there's just another old guy on
Speaker 5: his plate. Two different men sleeping on their plates Norms
Speaker 5: just like andicap. Yeah, it was so I couldn't believe it.
Speaker 5: When when am I ever gonna see that again?
Speaker 1: That's magical.
Speaker 6: Ever, that's a magical moment.
Speaker 5: It was the best.
Speaker 3: I wonder if that's the moment diner where the guy
Speaker 3: who wrote Dan in real life works probably and.
Speaker 1: He got all his inspiration.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Oh, man. I remember when I first moved to LA
Speaker 6: and I would fantasize. I would think, like if I
Speaker 6: could just get that job delivering pizza, like you know,
Speaker 6: like that was making it for me. It was getting
Speaker 6: the the cool La working actor job, like I'm gonna
Speaker 6: do it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh yeah, what what place did you deliver flavored.
Speaker 6: For Ocean Park Pizza? And then I delivered for yummy
Speaker 6: dot com for years?
Speaker 5: Now?
Speaker 6: Did it? Ever?
Speaker 5: This thing happened that sometimes happens in eighties movies where
Speaker 5: a lady a pretty mom and curlers and wearing silking
Speaker 5: neglige is like, why don't you come in and have
Speaker 5: a slice with me?
Speaker 6: Oh yeah, that'd happen, honestly, Yeah, that would happen a lot. Actually,
Speaker 6: not so much delivering pizza, because it's just a different
Speaker 6: type of delivering groceries. I would deliver wine and a
Speaker 6: vodka and salad, fruits, g rades, different sexy stuff. And
Speaker 6: at one time I delivered a cranberry juice vodka in
Speaker 6: a pregnancy test.
Speaker 5: Oh wow, that was great. Wow, I bet that one
Speaker 5: invited yet.
Speaker 6: Yeah. But now there was a couple of different customers
Speaker 6: where I would go and I knew that I was
Speaker 6: going to get into some sort of sexual situation, whether
Speaker 6: it be like they wanted me to watch them like
Speaker 6: try on new outfits or Yeah. And then there was
Speaker 6: one woman that we, you know, rock, rock n rolled.
Speaker 6: She was definitely I'd say, let's see, I was probably
Speaker 6: twenty three and I think she was probably forty five.
Speaker 6: She's just a she was like up nineties kind of
Speaker 6: plastic babe, like Amla Anderson style, you know what I mean. Yeah,
Speaker 6: and she lived I think you guys totally rock and rolled. Yeah,
Speaker 6: we rock and rolled, dude. No, So I delivered to her.
Speaker 6: She lived in Santa Monica. I would deliver to her
Speaker 6: and she would or she would get salad and vodka
Speaker 6: every every night and every around midnight, and I would
Speaker 6: deliver to her. Every time I would go there, something
Speaker 6: would be different. She would She started just in regular clothes,
Speaker 6: and then she started in like a swimsuit that she
Speaker 6: was wearing a robe, and then one night her robe
Speaker 6: was open. And then one night I went there and
Speaker 6: she wasn't there. She wasn't in the doorway like she
Speaker 6: always was, and.
Speaker 5: She come upstairs.
Speaker 6: Yeah. No, she was like, come on into the living
Speaker 6: room and sit on the couch and look for cash.
Speaker 6: And I went in and sat on the couch and
Speaker 6: when I sat on to the couch, a vibrator rolled
Speaker 6: out from the cushion next to me.
Speaker 5: And did she set that up?
Speaker 6: I don't know. And then she came in and gave
Speaker 6: me cash and she was like, oh my god, I'm
Speaker 6: so embarrassed. Sorry, I'm just I've just been very horny.
Speaker 6: We can go, And I said, like I remember thinking like, okay,
Speaker 6: it's like I have to this has to happen. So
Speaker 6: I was like, hey, I know how you feel. And
Speaker 6: then no joke. She was like really and she sat
Speaker 6: down and stood me up and pulled my pants down
Speaker 6: and gave me a blowjob.
Speaker 1: It are you.
Speaker 3: Not describing the last dirty movie you rented?
Speaker 6: No, I'm not really. I swear this happened. So after
Speaker 6: that happened, she was like, come back to my place
Speaker 6: after you get off. I went back to work and
Speaker 6: all the other drivers were closing out, you know, and
Speaker 6: cashing out and stuff. And I was like, hey, have
Speaker 6: you'll ever been to this person's house and they were
Speaker 6: like yeah, yeah, out of time. Man, she's a babe,
Speaker 6: And I was like, yeah, that's anything. Have you ever
Speaker 6: is anything ever? And they were like, she ah, right, man,
Speaker 6: we wish And then I sped back to her place
Speaker 6: and I called her and she didn't respond, and then
Speaker 6: texted her and she didn't respond, and I waited there.
Speaker 6: This is probably a.
Speaker 5: One that's funny.
Speaker 6: I waited there until three am, and she called me
Speaker 6: and told me to come up.
Speaker 5: And when I went up, she was having a vodka
Speaker 5: and salad nap.
Speaker 6: No, she was looking through a telescope on her balcony.
Speaker 6: She lived on the beach in Santa Monica. Whoa, And
Speaker 6: she like told me to come out there. I thought
Speaker 6: she was gonna teach me everything I ever needed.
Speaker 5: To know, missus Robinson, so yeah, sure, But.
Speaker 6: Instead she just brought me out to her balcony and
Speaker 6: told me about astrological symbols and oh and eventually she
Speaker 6: started talking about how she could never she'll never be
Speaker 6: able to find love. Oh no, and that how I'm
Speaker 6: not like the other drivers.
Speaker 5: Oh and then she said she had had relations with
Speaker 5: the other drivers.
Speaker 6: I don't know. That's the thing. I remember her going,
Speaker 6: You're not like Wayne.
Speaker 5: The other kid who.
Speaker 6: Looked like Chris Rock was always he always wanted to
Speaker 6: talk about fantasy football.
Speaker 5: But that guy. She she was.
Speaker 6: Like, yeah, you're not like the other drivers. And she's like,
Speaker 6: you go to a lot of houses on this street
Speaker 6: and as yeah, and she goes a lot of the
Speaker 6: girl women like me on the street and I said,
Speaker 6: I mean, yeah, honestly there it's just a lot.
Speaker 1: Of very.
Speaker 6: Like fit women. And that's she was like, do you
Speaker 6: know why I'm I's like no, And she goes, this
Speaker 6: is called call girl alley.
Speaker 5: What And I swear this is real.
Speaker 6: I've just got I'm good at telling this story because
Speaker 6: people always ask me if I've ever ever hooked up
Speaker 6: with anybody?
Speaker 5: All she's in the sex worker industry.
Speaker 6: Yeah, she goes, this is called call girl Alley. Most
Speaker 6: of the people who live on this street or were
Speaker 6: high profile call girls. Wow, and that's how we make
Speaker 6: our living. Like I'm not actually a masseuse. And she
Speaker 6: had her yet she had like a massage table in
Speaker 6: her place.
Speaker 5: Oh wow, with a price tag still on the three
Speaker 5: inches of dust. That is a maze. That's the most
Speaker 5: erotic story we've ever heard on you to need a run?
Speaker 3: That was girlfriend in La Yeah, how long did you
Speaker 3: was the wedding bells?
Speaker 5: No?
Speaker 6: But she did. Eventually she texted me that she moved
Speaker 6: out because I quit, you know, and then stopped seeing her.
Speaker 6: And she texted me that she moved out of that
Speaker 6: place and onto a boat and would invite me to
Speaker 6: come onto her boat all the time.
Speaker 5: But I never would, Yeah, because you'd get seasick. Yeah,
Speaker 5: because she grew, she had become a captain sat.
Speaker 3: I love that story that she's still tippy.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that was what was weird. After she gave me
Speaker 6: that blowjob, she gave me five dollars.
Speaker 5: Oh that's great. Did she make some sort of just
Speaker 5: the tip joke, like, because that would have been a
Speaker 5: perfect time for her to do that.
Speaker 6: No. But what's funny about that is after that, I
Speaker 6: had a set or something at Tiger Lily like the
Speaker 6: next day, and I was high off of that experience.
Speaker 6: I couldn't believe it. And Howard Kramer, who I didn't know.
Speaker 6: I only knew him in the way that I had seen,
Speaker 6: you know, any comedian on stage and sure, and was like, oh,
Speaker 6: he's like a successful comedian and he that's like, that's cool,
Speaker 6: he's like a headliner.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, that's what I thought at that time.
Speaker 6: I was really new and I was really nervous.
Speaker 5: To meet and he is a he is a cool headliner. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
Speaker 5: but at the time there's more of a trash from Oh.
Speaker 6: There were desolutely at a huge contract. Yeah, and I
Speaker 6: remember he uh, I think introduced him or I introduced
Speaker 6: myself to him. He asked me somehow we got to
Speaker 6: talk about it, and then he asked me if I
Speaker 6: had ever hooked up with anybody I was delivering to,
Speaker 6: and I told him, and I remember by the end
Speaker 6: of the story there was all of these comedians, like headlining,
Speaker 6: cool comedians who were gathered around listening to me tell
Speaker 6: the story. And it was like my introduction to cool comics.
Speaker 6: It was a very cool uh three days of my life.
Speaker 5: It's not a story that you would solicit or I
Speaker 5: can't knowing you. I can't imagine you just bringing it up.
Speaker 5: Someone has to say, oh, delivery, did you have? Yeah, that's.
Speaker 6: You.
Speaker 5: Ever go ahead and rock and roll.
Speaker 6: My friend rod we both worked there at that place.
Speaker 5: Of course, rod used to get still nothing.
Speaker 6: He's the king of YENGI well Rodney.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Rodney's my favorite person to talk to parties.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 6: He would work there too, and he would always make
Speaker 6: fun of me because of my experiences with just people
Speaker 6: in general, not even not just women, just like I
Speaker 6: would get One time I got sort of trapped into
Speaker 6: a closet by an obsessive, compulsive guy who was making
Speaker 6: me like put his San Pellegrino water with all of
Speaker 6: the cases facing a certain way, and it was just
Speaker 6: like he had a Picasso in the closet.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean I would go to the craziest places
Speaker 6: and what I found was like delivering in groceries in
Speaker 6: Santa Monica was where I work. You would deliver in
Speaker 6: Santa Monica and Venice, and I found that Venice and
Speaker 6: Santa Monica are so different. Santa Monica is this weirdo
Speaker 6: rich people who typically are working in the industry and
Speaker 6: are often very good tippers.
Speaker 5: Uh huh.
Speaker 6: And Venice, I'm sure this is not how No, not
Speaker 6: Venus people were the fucking worst.
Speaker 5: Hey, hey, I'm in Marina del Rey. I'm about yeah
Speaker 5: beard in a boat.
Speaker 6: They were the worst. And they were always so.
Speaker 5: Uh rude.
Speaker 6: Yeah, anytime anybody had any Marilyn Monroe art, they were
Speaker 6: always going to.
Speaker 5: Be Oh that's a great constant.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're probably on coke. I think those two things
Speaker 1: go together.
Speaker 6: Or like something.
Speaker 5: Jim Morris, well, I'm not surprised that you didn't end
Speaker 5: up in weird situations where people needed you in some way,
Speaker 5: because it's a type of person that needs to have
Speaker 5: their groceries delivered, like agoraphobic or or OCD or whatever,
Speaker 5: obsessive compulsive like I need to stay home and have someone,
Speaker 5: And whether they want to face it or not, they're
Speaker 5: probably lonely and they're like a person's here, Oh, I'm
Speaker 5: looking at my collection, Look at my boobs, look at help,
Speaker 5: get in my closet something, this is a Picasso hold me.
Speaker 6: I remember Rod was showing me the Ropes on my
Speaker 6: first day and he was like, yeah, so your first day,
Speaker 6: it's a Monday, so you mainly just delivered to businesses.
Speaker 6: It'll be a good day. Monday's a great Monday morning
Speaker 6: is a great morning. And I was like, sweet, this
Speaker 6: is gonna be great. My first delivery was to some
Speaker 6: apartment on on the by the beach, and it was
Speaker 6: this girl who was wasted from the night before, who
Speaker 6: made me take my shoes off and made me sit
Speaker 6: on the couch and explain to me how fucked up
Speaker 6: everything is.
Speaker 5: In the world.
Speaker 6: Yeah, just in the world.
Speaker 5: Thank god she didn't bring up astrology.
Speaker 6: And then yeah, she sat next to me on the
Speaker 6: couch and she said, why are you a delivery blake.
Speaker 6: I was like, I don't know, because it's a cool job.
Speaker 6: And she was like, okay, wow, I think you're too
Speaker 6: cool to be a delivery boy.
Speaker 5: What who the hell are you?
Speaker 6: I don't know, man, it was cool, the best.
Speaker 1: Time of my life. After how many minutes since she
Speaker 1: decided this, it was.
Speaker 6: Like five minutes.
Speaker 5: How long did you stay? Don't you have other deliveries?
Speaker 6: I did, but I was dude, you just get stuck.
Speaker 6: I wish everybody could just shadow a driver.
Speaker 5: Yeah, because you would.
Speaker 6: Get stuck doing people's chores.
Speaker 1: You would get you.
Speaker 6: I would ask you to at least with uber left.
Speaker 5: They're in your car for a minute and then you're
Speaker 5: rid of them. It's like there. You can't get any
Speaker 5: further than that. But when you're going to someone's house,
Speaker 5: depending on how to please just come into the next room,
Speaker 5: you're probably like, well, I'm either dying or I'm going
Speaker 5: to be bored, or I have to help someone with
Speaker 5: their catheter.
Speaker 1: Or celebrities, any celebrities yeah.
Speaker 6: I delivered to cool. Definitely delivered to celebrities.
Speaker 5: Hello cool, I'll just say I'll just say celebrity, Sandra Bullet, Wish, Clooney, Elton,
Speaker 5: John Who did I deliver James l.
Speaker 6: Ro delivered to John cheatle a bunch?
Speaker 5: Oh nice? Yeah, yeah, he's got it. He seems like he.
Speaker 6: Delivered to the guys from a mentalist.
Speaker 5: Baker.
Speaker 6: Everybody was nice. I didn't have any weird celebrity accounters.
Speaker 6: John Cleese's daughter, Camilla, who's now a comedian.
Speaker 5: Yeah, she's a comic. I've met her.
Speaker 6: Yeah, she but back then I don't think she was
Speaker 6: a comedian and she would tip like fucking it would
Speaker 6: change your life.
Speaker 5: Oh really, she's she's a nice person. She's very very tall.
Speaker 6: She's crazy. But she's on Main Street in Santa Monica.
Speaker 6: That's made out all metal. It's called like edge Cliff.
Speaker 6: It's by where Ben and Jerry's is on Main Street.
Speaker 5: Yeah. Is it not shape like a piano bill?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 5: Is it?
Speaker 6: Maybe?
Speaker 5: I think a bird's eye view or a plane. If
Speaker 5: you're not a bird, who can describe pianos?
Speaker 6: It's shape like a there's a theater there and I
Speaker 6: guess the woman who owns that theater would employ her
Speaker 6: assistance to get groceries in ice and water and beer
Speaker 6: delivered there for the week, so you would just keep
Speaker 6: your fingers crossed that you would get that delivery. But
Speaker 6: sometimes they would already have a bunch of the stuff
Speaker 6: from the last week, but it was just on the
Speaker 6: assistance list of things to do, and I think the
Speaker 6: owner of the place would give her like, okay, just
Speaker 6: spend three hundred dollars and do it. So sometimes you
Speaker 6: would go where they would only spend fifty bucks on groceries,
Speaker 6: and the assistant was so cool that she would tip
Speaker 6: everybody to like two hundred and fifty bucks. So it
Speaker 6: would it like I missed that a lot, like getting
Speaker 6: a tip that will that just like, oh my god,
Speaker 6: this changes everything.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, my whole month is different.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: I love those little Everyone loves money, right he look,
Speaker 5: well that brings it all. Look at it. Those grapefruits
Speaker 5: are going to sometriss o. That guy's so excited ours now.
Speaker 5: That guy, that guy is not like you and Rod.
Speaker 5: He seemed pretty by the books.
Speaker 1: You know, those are the ones that are the trickiest.
Speaker 6: Yeah, everybody, everybody who worked in Hollywood too, said the
Speaker 6: Wayne's brothers would give you a crazy good tip.
Speaker 5: And really, because I've heard that, Uh, Sean didn't tip
Speaker 5: very well at a restaurant. I have really good stories.
Speaker 6: It was with Marlon this night.
Speaker 5: Marlon, Yes, that's what I'm thinking of the young one. Yeah,
Speaker 5: he didn't tip very well. Sean's nice. I like that guy.
Speaker 5: I even like his stand up comedy.
Speaker 6: I love those I love that whole family. In my mind,
Speaker 6: they do.
Speaker 5: No wrong, especially if you're looking at a movie list. Yeah.
Speaker 6: But uh and then Kevin Smith, great tipper, Drew Carrey.
Speaker 5: Good So you went all the way up. Did you
Speaker 5: go into his house? Oh?
Speaker 6: No, I didn't meet these guys. These are just like
Speaker 6: from I would mainly deliver at night to loansome women.
Speaker 6: During the day was the celebs.
Speaker 5: I could listen to you talk about that all the time.
Speaker 5: That's the best.
Speaker 3: I don't know, maybe you need to start a podcast
Speaker 3: because it's kind of like erotic fan fiction.
Speaker 1: But what really happened?
Speaker 6: I thought about it.
Speaker 5: My next started sweating during that as soon as the
Speaker 5: dildo came out of the couch, and I was like,
Speaker 5: oh my lord, it feels like.
Speaker 6: It definitely something out of a Brett Easton, Ellis Breddy,
Speaker 6: Bretty Sternellis Reddy.
Speaker 5: That's so great.
Speaker 1: I like it.
Speaker 3: Now, will you tell my second favorite story because that
Speaker 3: just replaced it. But the other story that you tell
Speaker 3: that I love, if you're comfortable doing it, is what
Speaker 3: happened to you when you were little?
Speaker 6: Oh when I was kidnapped?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 6: What the first time you were what?
Speaker 5: Where? Oh? Yeah?
Speaker 4: Where?
Speaker 5: What kind of a town? Let's first describe.
Speaker 1: There are all these stories. You just have the same
Speaker 1: smile on your face. It's all I all a similar experience.
Speaker 6: I just think that by the time I was like eleven,
Speaker 6: so many I had been so put upon and everything
Speaker 6: worked out. But by the time I was eleven, my
Speaker 6: life was such a joke.
Speaker 5: You know, like how am I around?
Speaker 6: Because there was another time? Okay, well there was another
Speaker 6: time when I was eleven where I almost got kidnapped
Speaker 6: again in New York City. But when I was three,
Speaker 6: I was lived in Birmingham, and I was hanging Birmingham, Alabama,
Speaker 6: was hanging out with my in my kitchen, and a
Speaker 6: man broke into my house. I mean, I'll tell the
Speaker 6: full story, not this, but man so a man broke
Speaker 6: in my house. He like pushed my mom down.
Speaker 5: I still have anticipation of it getting erotic though. Sorry.
Speaker 6: Sorry, he broke into my house, pushed my mom down
Speaker 6: and grabbed me out of the kitchen and then ran
Speaker 6: out the back of the house and he ran up
Speaker 6: the steps that we lived in. Our house was lower
Speaker 6: than the backstreet, so he had to run up the
Speaker 6: steps and then out into the street. And luckily my
Speaker 6: dad was driving down the street. Oh you're kidding and
Speaker 6: saw this man, and you know, my dad.
Speaker 5: Like, did he play it cool and go pardon me, sir?
Speaker 6: Karate and the joke I say, my dad was like,
Speaker 6: excuse me, sir, that's my boy. Give him here. But yeah,
Speaker 6: so my dad, no, my so, I did tell that,
Speaker 6: and my the man gave me back to my dad,
Speaker 6: and my dad called the cops. And my dad whenever
Speaker 6: he heard me tell that, he was like, dude, you don't
Speaker 6: mention the acts.
Speaker 5: And I was like what.
Speaker 6: But in the so, what truthfully happened was my dad
Speaker 6: got out of the car and had a act his
Speaker 6: trunk and pointed at the dude's throat until the dude
Speaker 6: like gave me back, and then my dad called the cops,
Speaker 6: and the cops went to the man's house, and the
Speaker 6: dude lived in a creepy backhouse and my dad describes
Speaker 6: as something out of True Detective.
Speaker 5: That's so so your dad.
Speaker 6: Wait wait, okay, well inside of the look at that building.
Speaker 6: Inside of the backhouse, he lived in like a hoarder's life,
Speaker 6: you know. And he had a living room with an old,
Speaker 6: weird bathtub in the middle of it. And then the
Speaker 6: bathtub was all this gross, dirty water and stuff, A
Speaker 6: bunch of my toys and clothes and things.
Speaker 5: From previous oh and a bunch.
Speaker 6: Of photos that the man had been taken to me
Speaker 6: since the day I was brought home from the hospital.
Speaker 5: Oh shit, you were his favorite boy.
Speaker 6: I was his favorite best boy.
Speaker 5: Ohly shit.
Speaker 6: And so you know they.
Speaker 5: Your life is a joke. Yeah, how how does that happen?
Speaker 6: I don't know, man, But he was about two blocks
Speaker 6: away from my house, so if it would have worked out,
Speaker 6: I would have been one of those kids it was kidnapped,
Speaker 6: and yeah, stuck two blocks.
Speaker 5: Away with Stockholm syndrome. That that where it has a
Speaker 5: weird haircut and wears a togn like you. Oh god,
Speaker 5: that's so scary. Yeah, and did you see that guy
Speaker 5: around the neighborhood after that or did he went to.
Speaker 6: Jail and then went to a mental institution. He had
Speaker 6: a history of this same thing before. Oh my god
Speaker 6: lived in his brother's back house and his brother So
Speaker 6: how did someone in New York also have your toys
Speaker 6: and pictures of Was that just a random when I
Speaker 6: was physically peaking, Like if you looked at a photo
Speaker 6: of me, I was the perfect amount of sad. My
Speaker 6: dad had just ran off, Like I was that that
Speaker 6: dream boat sadn.
Speaker 5: Oh god, I'm so kidnappable.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I looked great. Anyway, I was sitting in the
Speaker 6: hotel room. My brother lived half in New York with
Speaker 6: his dad and half in Alabama, and so we were
Speaker 6: visiting him and this my mom had this hotel with
Speaker 6: me and my cousins and I was ten or eleven,
Speaker 6: and my mom went out on a date that night,
Speaker 6: and my cousins all went and had fun with my
Speaker 6: brother's New York friends. They were about sixteen. So it
Speaker 6: was like dream situation, you know, living kids.
Speaker 5: Yeah, the movie Kids, Yeah, except no aids.
Speaker 6: No aids. Yeah. So they left me at the hotel
Speaker 6: and I was watching Critics Choice, the Dana Carvey Special Special. Ever,
Speaker 6: when every time I see Dana Carvey's face, I get
Speaker 6: fear in my heart because of this. But so I
Speaker 6: was watching Critics Choice and in this hotel there was
Speaker 6: a courtyard in the center of it, and there was
Speaker 6: all of these you could see into the other hotel rooms,
Speaker 6: sort of like it was a square hotel with an
Speaker 6: empty center. And I was sitting by the window watching
Speaker 6: Critics Choice and the phone rang and I answered, and
Speaker 6: it was this voice went, hey, little boy, I could
Speaker 6: see you in there.
Speaker 5: I'm watching you.
Speaker 6: Oh, don't move, I'm going to come in there and
Speaker 6: fuck you in the ass.
Speaker 5: No way.
Speaker 6: Yeah, And I freaked and I hid under the bed,
Speaker 6: under the like pull out bed.
Speaker 5: Holy shit.
Speaker 6: And then it called again and it goes, don't you
Speaker 6: hide under the fucking bed. IM to come in there
Speaker 6: right now and to.
Speaker 5: Fuck you in the ass. This is the scariest stop it.
Speaker 6: Yes, it was so scary. I started kind of ran
Speaker 6: out of the hotel and I ran to the elevator
Speaker 6: and the elevator opened, and this giant man was in
Speaker 6: the elevator, like, you know, like a ten foot tall man.
Speaker 6: And I screamed and ran back, ran down all of
Speaker 6: the steps, uh huh, and into the lobby and I
Speaker 6: was I went into the lobby bar asking if they
Speaker 6: had seen my mom, which was just like, oh, no, kid,
Speaker 6: what's wrong? And I was clearly something was wrong with
Speaker 6: me and then they were like what no, And I
Speaker 6: looked I didn't see my mom and I ran out
Speaker 6: into the street and I ran across the street into
Speaker 6: this other fancy restaurant and my mom was there.
Speaker 5: And you're just a kid in your pajamas right now, yeah,
Speaker 5: holy shitballs.
Speaker 6: And my mom was there and I ran up to
Speaker 6: her like crying, freaking.
Speaker 5: Out, screaming, someone's gonna fuck me in the air well.
Speaker 6: She was on a date with this guy, and I
Speaker 6: was like afraid to She was like, what's going.
Speaker 5: Afraid to ruin the date by giving a horrible mom impression.
Speaker 5: This seems like it's going well, but a ten foot
Speaker 5: man's gonna fuck my butt.
Speaker 6: I was freaking out and I was like, Mom, what
Speaker 6: am I supposed to do? And she's like there's somebody
Speaker 6: and she's like what is the man saying? And I
Speaker 6: was too afraid to say it, Like I was embarrassed
Speaker 6: to sit a fuck me and the ass oh, and
Speaker 6: my mom was like, okay, we'll just go to the lobby.
Speaker 6: And you know, she was having difficult time in her life.
Speaker 6: She's like, go to the lobby and I'll be there soon,
Speaker 6: or I'll get your brother to come there. And my
Speaker 6: brother came to the lobby and my brother is the coolest.
Speaker 6: And we went up to the hotel and my cousins
Speaker 6: were making fun of me all night and my aunt
Speaker 6: about being like spoiled and always have to be the
Speaker 6: center of attention ruined their good time, and that the
Speaker 6: saying I made it up. And then the next night
Speaker 6: my brother took me out because my brother believed me.
Speaker 6: He felt bad and he took me out with all
Speaker 6: of his friends in New York and like we went
Speaker 6: and looked at the Brooklyn Banks.
Speaker 5: It was really cool.
Speaker 6: This was his famous.
Speaker 5: Skates bad did you skateboard?
Speaker 6: Ye?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I skated okay.
Speaker 6: And that night the same man called my cousin Jenny,
Speaker 6: who is alone in the So.
Speaker 5: This is a guy that's looking out his window or yeah,
Speaker 5: somehow out of.
Speaker 3: His windows and knows that that room number the phone number,
Speaker 3: which is crazy.
Speaker 6: What a horrible person now, And then everyone believed Ginny.
Speaker 6: Of course she was a little older. And uh, and
Speaker 6: I went to Schwartz and I bought a action figure.
Speaker 6: My mom got me an action figure.
Speaker 5: Wait, that's what you get, I guess.
Speaker 3: Now, do you think the ten foot man in the
Speaker 3: elevator was the right?
Speaker 5: That's what I was. That was just it was just
Speaker 5: like a perfect situation, even as a little kid. You know,
Speaker 5: that's the last guy you want trying to fuck your butt. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 5: giant just look at his hands like a kid knows
Speaker 5: that much. Yeah is Oh, that's so scary. Do you
Speaker 5: think any any steps were taken to try and put
Speaker 5: that guy in jail and then a mental institution, because
Speaker 5: because it probably would have been easy to find him. Yeah,
Speaker 5: but I guess he didn't break the law to actually
Speaker 5: be jailed. He's just prank calling people. He probably wouldn't.
Speaker 6: It could have just been kids doing it. I mean,
Speaker 6: who knows. But well, they were looking into my window.
Speaker 6: They described what I was doing, So who knows. Either way?
Speaker 6: That was scary.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that is I can't believe those two things happened
Speaker 5: to you.
Speaker 3: Do you have a story where someone doesn't want you?
Speaker 1: Do you have.
Speaker 5: Where you got turned down?
Speaker 3: By someone is reaching and then it's like, you know where.
Speaker 5: You wanted to get kidnapped at some point where you wanted.
Speaker 6: To I wanted it, but it didn't happen.
Speaker 1: Robe to you.
Speaker 6: Where that's happened in a smaller scale, a.
Speaker 5: Dildo flew out of a couch and they were like,
Speaker 5: that's not mine, Maybe you should leave.
Speaker 6: No, I think you know. I was talking to a
Speaker 6: buddy of mine recently and she was saying, she thinks
Speaker 6: that the reason this would happen to me and continue,
Speaker 6: I continue to get in situations that maybe are not good,
Speaker 6: like encounters with people where they I get stuck with
Speaker 6: them in some way and they it's she was saying,
Speaker 6: it's because I don't I I don't. I don't really
Speaker 6: drink too much. I don't like there's nothing about me
Speaker 6: that would say I'm like troubled right off the bat.
Speaker 5: No, No, you seem you seem like an innocent person
Speaker 5: in the face.
Speaker 6: And I put off a very yeah, I put off
Speaker 6: a very like innocent and experienced vibe. So I think
Speaker 6: that people think that, oh, this will be fine because
Speaker 6: he's he's never seen anything like this.
Speaker 5: Especially Yeah. Yeah. Add the fact that you were indeed
Speaker 5: a child.
Speaker 6: Well back then, yeah, oh god, But I think that's
Speaker 6: why with delivering groceries, people would always invite me in
Speaker 6: a little more than other people.
Speaker 5: Whereas I if I went door to door, I'd have
Speaker 5: this angry look and a mustache and they're like, oh,
Speaker 5: that guy would just add to my complaints, my problems.
Speaker 5: But no, I've experienced that too, especially when I was younger,
Speaker 5: Like why is it that people take advantage of me?
Speaker 5: Or what it's because if some crazy person stops me
Speaker 5: on the street, or I'm getting better at it and said, hey,
Speaker 5: pardon me, sir, I'd stop and I'd hear them out,
Speaker 5: whereas you're not supposed to do that, or I've learned
Speaker 5: not to. But it's a young person. I also, I shared,
Speaker 5: I think what you're talking about a little bit. Yeah,
Speaker 5: and it's and it's a face.
Speaker 6: I've gotten better at it now. But now if I am,
Speaker 6: if I am go hey, oh hey, I actually can't
Speaker 6: talk right now.
Speaker 5: Oh sorry, that it's hair.
Speaker 6: Oh sorry, I go, hey, I can't talk right now
Speaker 6: because I have to go to the bathroom or something.
Speaker 6: Then someone buddy will go come up to me. My
Speaker 6: friend buddy will go, hey, man, why were.
Speaker 5: You such a dick?
Speaker 1: To Jim?
Speaker 6: And I wait talking about and then he'll go. Jim
Speaker 6: just came up to me and said you were the
Speaker 6: biggest asshole ever to him.
Speaker 5: Weird, Like, I just feel like I.
Speaker 6: Gave too much at one point, and now if I
Speaker 6: don't give it all people.
Speaker 5: Oh it's it's contrasting. Yeah, God, that's so funny.
Speaker 1: You don't have to give anything.
Speaker 6: Well, I feel like you're like that, Karen. I feel
Speaker 6: like I always see you talking to people for a
Speaker 6: very long time.
Speaker 3: Oh, I give nothing though. Really, Yeah, I'm just gonna bullshitting.
Speaker 3: But ultimately, you know, the curtains are closed inside.
Speaker 1: And that's my problem. That's really my that's my burden
Speaker 1: to bear.
Speaker 5: I think usually I'm in a decent mood and I
Speaker 5: talk to people, but then I turn it off pretty quickly,
Speaker 5: and I think people think I'm quick to anger, and
Speaker 5: I think that it's because that's probably true. You mean
Speaker 5: we're going the wrong way? Who cares? Who cares? You
Speaker 5: know what? It's a horrible design for a parking lot.
Speaker 5: It's they everyone has shame and the rise for us.
Speaker 5: I'll just give a friendly wave.
Speaker 1: Sorry about Sorry, it's time, Right, it's time.
Speaker 5: For Yeah, it's we're we're writing time. It's ten your
Speaker 5: comedy concerts. We're going to the improv. We're dropping we
Speaker 5: off of the improv. He's gonna do you're doing stand
Speaker 5: up right and not one of these uh characters. Nah,
Speaker 5: I'll think you do a very good uh Matthew McConaughey.
Speaker 5: But you don't have to do it now. I'm not gonna.
Speaker 6: They I'll just tell everybody the key to Matthew McConaughey
Speaker 6: is to say pharmaceutical drugs. Yeah, I'm not sure. Right
Speaker 6: in there, say the names of his movies and say
Speaker 6: what he talks about in the movie, and then and
Speaker 6: go yelish, Buyers Club and confused. I have no shame.
Speaker 5: I love that was great.
Speaker 4: I love what they want.
Speaker 6: Yeah, give we'll give it.
Speaker 5: To I'm thank you for being a great guest and
Speaker 5: telling the best stories we've had so far. I can't
Speaker 5: I'm horrified and still tantalized. Tantalized, Yes, thanks, of course.
Speaker 1: Absolutely. Do you have anything you want to plug?
Speaker 6: Yeah, just follow me on Twitter.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's all I really want out of people, too,
Speaker 5: is it?
Speaker 6: Thomas Whitmore, Thomas Whitmer, w H I T. M. E. R.
Speaker 5: Thomas And if you're ever in Los angelet's go to
Speaker 5: the satellite and watch Poware Violence. It's a great show.
Speaker 1: Yes, hilarious, wonderful. Well skateboard good feelings.
Speaker 5: Yeah, good skateboard vibes. People need to realize that that's
Speaker 5: a good vibe skateboarding.
Speaker 1: It's the best vibe.
Speaker 5: Wit, nice skateboard and let's plug this. Let's go skating. Well,
Speaker 5: I have to get a fake hip first. No, I
Speaker 5: can still roll around.
Speaker 6: Okay, cool, let's do that.
Speaker 5: Karen, do you have anything you want to say? I conclusionary.
Speaker 1: Here's my conclusion thing.
Speaker 3: If you guys go skating, please video tape it.
Speaker 1: Okay, make a video of some kind.
Speaker 5: He's good at that. WIT's always made little videos. Yeah,
Speaker 5: I've never rid.
Speaker 6: I never I got you in a video.
Speaker 5: You did? You did? And I think I was like,
Speaker 5: oh man, I still have that hunchback. Last time I
Speaker 5: do that again. I don't like the way. But this
Speaker 5: time I'll make a video and I'll make sure to
Speaker 5: make my spine straight.
Speaker 6: Yeah, okay, let's do that.
Speaker 5: Yeah, we're gonna do that. Some goals, some realistic goals,
Speaker 5: and I'm gonna learn to enunciate. And I'll start by saying,
Speaker 5: you've been listening to Do you need a ride? D
Speaker 5: Y N A R?
Speaker 1: Are you leaving? I you wanna way back?
Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be there, doesn't matter how
Speaker 2: much baggage you clean us time and they turning on
Speaker 2: and Gabe, we want to send you.
Speaker 1: Off in stamer We want to welcome.
Speaker 5: You back home. Tell us all about it.
Speaker 2: We scared or was it fine?
Speaker 1: Melbourn the the.
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?
Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?
Speaker 5: Do you need to ride? Do you need with Karen
Speaker 5: and Chris