1 00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:05,240 Speaker 1: It's stay or go. Okay, Dante here, Hi Dante, how 2 00:00:05,280 --> 00:00:05,800 Speaker 1: you doing, man? 3 00:00:07,800 --> 00:00:08,320 Speaker 2: I'm okay. 4 00:00:08,440 --> 00:00:10,799 Speaker 1: I mean, all things considered, look at this guy. All 5 00:00:10,840 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: things considered, Well, we don't know what all those things are. 6 00:00:13,520 --> 00:00:16,040 Speaker 1: So we got to understand here. This is. You can 7 00:00:16,120 --> 00:00:17,959 Speaker 1: hit us up on all the different socials that we 8 00:00:17,960 --> 00:00:21,040 Speaker 1: have Fred Show Radio. Search for the Fred Show Fredshow 9 00:00:21,120 --> 00:00:24,080 Speaker 1: Radio dot com. You got this, this situation going on 10 00:00:24,120 --> 00:00:30,160 Speaker 1: with your wife. So what happened? Well, you know, I'm 11 00:00:30,160 --> 00:00:31,840 Speaker 1: not like a pack rat, but I have my things. 12 00:00:31,880 --> 00:00:34,400 Speaker 2: I have my stuff, like you know, there's my things, right, 13 00:00:34,920 --> 00:00:37,240 Speaker 2: and my wife likes to clean. 14 00:00:37,479 --> 00:00:37,920 Speaker 1: I know this. 15 00:00:38,000 --> 00:00:40,160 Speaker 2: I try to keep my space is clean, my stuff clean, 16 00:00:40,360 --> 00:00:41,840 Speaker 2: our shared space is clean. 17 00:00:42,040 --> 00:00:42,199 Speaker 1: Right. 18 00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:46,560 Speaker 2: But I go, I go out of town, I come back, 19 00:00:47,280 --> 00:00:50,840 Speaker 2: I have I have, I have fewer things. 20 00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:52,879 Speaker 1: She got rid of a lot of stuff, so she 21 00:00:52,960 --> 00:00:55,360 Speaker 1: decided to go through your stuff while you were gone, 22 00:00:56,120 --> 00:00:58,319 Speaker 1: and just I guess, like, pair down, like you don't 23 00:00:58,360 --> 00:00:59,880 Speaker 1: need this, you don't need that. She made that this 24 00:01:00,200 --> 00:01:03,760 Speaker 1: so that you would have a more organized space. I 25 00:01:03,840 --> 00:01:05,399 Speaker 1: think that was her intention. 26 00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:08,400 Speaker 2: But I uh, I got a little hot about it, and. 27 00:01:09,440 --> 00:01:12,119 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's just upset. Still, I'm still kind of upset 28 00:01:12,120 --> 00:01:14,119 Speaker 1: about it, honestly, So she didn't say to you ahead 29 00:01:14,160 --> 00:01:15,920 Speaker 1: of time, like hey, are you leaving town? Like can 30 00:01:15,959 --> 00:01:17,920 Speaker 1: I go through this stuff? And you know, I let 31 00:01:17,959 --> 00:01:19,679 Speaker 1: me keep the stuff you wear and maybe will donate 32 00:01:19,720 --> 00:01:22,240 Speaker 1: the stuff that you don't. She didn't discuss this with you. 33 00:01:22,240 --> 00:01:25,040 Speaker 1: You came back and your closet is like different. 34 00:01:25,920 --> 00:01:28,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm saying, yeah, there's there's there's clothing, right, it's shoes, 35 00:01:28,959 --> 00:01:34,280 Speaker 3: it's belts, it's it's some really personal things that I 36 00:01:35,160 --> 00:01:37,880 Speaker 3: kind of thought, we're assumed were hands off, but she 37 00:01:37,920 --> 00:01:38,800 Speaker 3: got her hands on them. 38 00:01:38,959 --> 00:01:40,679 Speaker 1: Like when did she give away? Did she give it 39 00:01:40,680 --> 00:01:43,440 Speaker 1: away or throw it away? Or what did she do? 40 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:46,560 Speaker 2: Donate gone? You know, she gave me like the same 41 00:01:46,560 --> 00:01:48,440 Speaker 2: hold like, oh yeah, I took it to donation. It's 42 00:01:48,520 --> 00:01:51,040 Speaker 2: you know, it's kind of out of my hands. Now. 43 00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:53,280 Speaker 2: I thought about driving around and seemed like I pick 44 00:01:53,320 --> 00:01:55,320 Speaker 2: through it, but I just got really mad. 45 00:01:55,400 --> 00:01:57,400 Speaker 1: What did she give away that was important to you? 46 00:01:59,000 --> 00:02:01,920 Speaker 2: Top of my list? It was a jacket that honestly 47 00:02:01,920 --> 00:02:04,080 Speaker 2: doesn't fit me so well anymore, but my mom gave 48 00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:07,160 Speaker 2: it to me. Oh and and like she and she 49 00:02:07,200 --> 00:02:09,560 Speaker 2: passed away, you know, And so it's kind of like 50 00:02:09,880 --> 00:02:13,320 Speaker 2: something I remember her by, and uh, I'm getting kind 51 00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:15,240 Speaker 2: of I'm getting tight to talk about right now, so 52 00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:17,880 Speaker 2: I'm just just I got to sit down. 53 00:02:17,960 --> 00:02:20,560 Speaker 1: I'm sitting down now. So she thought she was helping me, Like, look, 54 00:02:20,639 --> 00:02:22,880 Speaker 1: did do you believe that she had the best of 55 00:02:22,960 --> 00:02:25,520 Speaker 1: intentions or do you think was it one of those 56 00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:27,840 Speaker 1: like points of contention in your relationship where she was like, 57 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:30,240 Speaker 1: I need you to get this together and you're like no, no, no, 58 00:02:30,280 --> 00:02:32,000 Speaker 1: So finally she just did it. I mean, do you 59 00:02:32,040 --> 00:02:34,400 Speaker 1: feel like it was she was trying to surprise you 60 00:02:34,840 --> 00:02:36,960 Speaker 1: in a good way or do you think it was like, no, 61 00:02:37,080 --> 00:02:38,720 Speaker 1: you know what, I've asked you enough times and now 62 00:02:38,720 --> 00:02:40,680 Speaker 1: I'm just gonna do it because I'm because I'm kind 63 00:02:40,680 --> 00:02:41,359 Speaker 1: of mad about it. 64 00:02:41,919 --> 00:02:44,720 Speaker 2: I've gotten notes about stuff I've had before from her. 65 00:02:44,760 --> 00:02:49,040 Speaker 2: I've had some feedback. But honestly, like, I think she 66 00:02:49,120 --> 00:02:50,960 Speaker 2: was helping. I think she she she convinced me that 67 00:02:51,000 --> 00:02:53,120 Speaker 2: she thought she was helping doing good thing because she 68 00:02:53,160 --> 00:02:55,040 Speaker 2: knows that like if I sat and did it would 69 00:02:55,040 --> 00:02:56,800 Speaker 2: take so much time. But you know, since she's just 70 00:02:56,800 --> 00:02:58,800 Speaker 2: going through it, it's she's so much more fishing with that. 71 00:02:58,880 --> 00:03:00,480 Speaker 2: And we already know that she's you know, she's a 72 00:03:00,520 --> 00:03:03,280 Speaker 2: clean one. She tidies up and she's very good at it, 73 00:03:03,360 --> 00:03:06,160 Speaker 2: and she prides herself on just getting stuff done, you know, like. 74 00:03:06,120 --> 00:03:08,040 Speaker 1: A power hour. She can just go through things really quick, 75 00:03:08,080 --> 00:03:10,760 Speaker 1: like a whirlwind and okay, boom. But Dante, this is 76 00:03:10,800 --> 00:03:13,480 Speaker 1: stay or go. So like we're are you really at 77 00:03:13,520 --> 00:03:15,440 Speaker 1: the level where you're so mad about this that you're 78 00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:18,560 Speaker 1: thinking about ending your relationship? Like this is your wife. 79 00:03:19,320 --> 00:03:23,080 Speaker 1: I'm tearing. It's like we've it was just such a shock. 80 00:03:23,120 --> 00:03:26,120 Speaker 2: It's such a shock and I don't know how to 81 00:03:26,160 --> 00:03:27,520 Speaker 2: move forward here. I don't know how to move forward 82 00:03:27,520 --> 00:03:27,959 Speaker 2: on this one. 83 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:29,520 Speaker 1: It's it's like that's like. 84 00:03:29,480 --> 00:03:31,840 Speaker 2: My it's not just like like deleting photos. 85 00:03:31,440 --> 00:03:33,519 Speaker 1: Or something from you, you know, it's like disy possessions. 86 00:03:33,520 --> 00:03:34,400 Speaker 2: I cannot give back. 87 00:03:34,480 --> 00:03:36,600 Speaker 1: Well you get back. What she could have done to Dante 88 00:03:36,600 --> 00:03:39,520 Speaker 1: is she could have organized the space and then taking 89 00:03:39,520 --> 00:03:42,280 Speaker 1: the stuff that she didn't think that you wanted anymore 90 00:03:42,720 --> 00:03:45,480 Speaker 1: and held on to it and like putting bags or 91 00:03:45,520 --> 00:03:47,960 Speaker 1: something and be like, hey, if you see anything here 92 00:03:47,960 --> 00:03:49,840 Speaker 1: that you're missing, it's in the garage. You can go 93 00:03:49,920 --> 00:03:51,600 Speaker 1: through that if you want to, And then you make 94 00:03:51,640 --> 00:03:53,920 Speaker 1: the decision on what to donate, because maybe I don't 95 00:03:53,920 --> 00:03:55,760 Speaker 1: know if you share a closet or share a bedroom, 96 00:03:55,840 --> 00:03:57,600 Speaker 1: whatever it is. But you know, if somebody else is 97 00:03:57,600 --> 00:04:00,600 Speaker 1: hoarding essentially and has all kinds of crap and you don't, 98 00:04:01,080 --> 00:04:03,880 Speaker 1: I can see why that would be irritating, especially if 99 00:04:03,880 --> 00:04:05,440 Speaker 1: it's a bunch of stuff that you're not even using 100 00:04:05,440 --> 00:04:06,880 Speaker 1: and you're just too lazy to go through it. But 101 00:04:07,080 --> 00:04:09,920 Speaker 1: for her to have made the edits herself. Listen to 102 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:12,560 Speaker 1: this man, he's distraught, yea. But for her to have 103 00:04:12,600 --> 00:04:15,120 Speaker 1: made the decision and then given it away and now 104 00:04:15,120 --> 00:04:18,040 Speaker 1: it's gone, I mean that's very controlling. 105 00:04:19,080 --> 00:04:21,279 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, send me a text, I mean something, 106 00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:23,440 Speaker 2: I'll give me a chance some saying it. 107 00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:25,240 Speaker 1: Take a photo and say it to me like, hey, 108 00:04:25,360 --> 00:04:28,760 Speaker 1: is this okay? Is this okay? I agree? I agree. 109 00:04:28,839 --> 00:04:30,480 Speaker 1: Well let me. I'm gonna take some phone calls on this. 110 00:04:30,480 --> 00:04:31,920 Speaker 1: We're gonna talk about you behind your back. But have 111 00:04:31,960 --> 00:04:34,960 Speaker 1: the radio on or I heart or whatever. And I 112 00:04:35,000 --> 00:04:37,040 Speaker 1: don't know if this is a divorceable offense, but it's 113 00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:40,640 Speaker 1: certainly it's not ideal. Eight five five five one h 114 00:04:40,720 --> 00:04:44,160 Speaker 1: three five. Thank you Dante, good luck, thank you, appreciate you. 115 00:04:44,200 --> 00:04:45,840 Speaker 1: What are you guys gonna do if you come home 116 00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:51,240 Speaker 1: and your significant other has rearranged all your stuff and 117 00:04:51,360 --> 00:04:54,600 Speaker 1: not only that, and that might be nice, by the way, 118 00:04:54,640 --> 00:04:55,880 Speaker 1: I mean like, I'm going through a bit of an 119 00:04:55,960 --> 00:05:01,000 Speaker 1: organizational phase myself, except the organization includes me deciding what 120 00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:04,600 Speaker 1: stays and goes, and then somebody helping me organize because 121 00:05:05,400 --> 00:05:08,800 Speaker 1: I don't know what contraptions to buy and how to lay. 122 00:05:09,040 --> 00:05:11,839 Speaker 1: I don't know. It's basically I'm lazy and I don't 123 00:05:11,960 --> 00:05:13,160 Speaker 1: want to do it, but I need to do it. 124 00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:16,400 Speaker 1: But I'm not letting the person throw stuff away without 125 00:05:16,480 --> 00:05:19,640 Speaker 1: consulting me first, right, Like, you don't get to just 126 00:05:19,680 --> 00:05:22,839 Speaker 1: go through my stuff and throw my stuff away, especially 127 00:05:22,880 --> 00:05:27,520 Speaker 1: considering you don't know what items you know are nostalgic 128 00:05:27,600 --> 00:05:29,320 Speaker 1: to me or hold value. Now, the other thing is 129 00:05:29,400 --> 00:05:31,440 Speaker 1: we've all probably known the person who's like, well, we 130 00:05:31,520 --> 00:05:34,120 Speaker 1: can't throw that away because of this, and before long 131 00:05:34,160 --> 00:05:36,560 Speaker 1: you're not throwing anything away. So I don't know if 132 00:05:36,600 --> 00:05:38,680 Speaker 1: maybe this was an intervention where she's like, look, I 133 00:05:38,720 --> 00:05:40,720 Speaker 1: can't live like this anymore, because we again, we're only 134 00:05:40,760 --> 00:05:42,280 Speaker 1: hearing his side of the story, so we don't know 135 00:05:42,720 --> 00:05:44,600 Speaker 1: exactly how much stuff we're talking about here, But maybe 136 00:05:44,600 --> 00:05:47,720 Speaker 1: it's just so much stuff where she's like, like, for example, 137 00:05:48,040 --> 00:05:50,160 Speaker 1: you guys know, I've had the closet of death in 138 00:05:50,240 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 1: my house and finally there's no longer the closet of death, 139 00:05:52,600 --> 00:05:54,400 Speaker 1: but ninety percent of what was in there got thrown 140 00:05:54,440 --> 00:05:56,360 Speaker 1: away or donated. I don't know why, because I hadn't 141 00:05:56,360 --> 00:05:58,560 Speaker 1: opened the close. I couldn't open the closet of death 142 00:05:58,839 --> 00:06:01,560 Speaker 1: in my house for like me, years and years and years, 143 00:06:01,600 --> 00:06:05,080 Speaker 1: which means nothing in there was really necessary for my survival, 144 00:06:05,680 --> 00:06:07,640 Speaker 1: right because I wasn't even going in there to use it. 145 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:11,640 Speaker 1: So somebody probably could have gone in there and gotten 146 00:06:11,720 --> 00:06:13,120 Speaker 1: rid of a lot of that stuff, and I could 147 00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:15,680 Speaker 1: have been mad at them, But the truth is I 148 00:06:15,800 --> 00:06:18,480 Speaker 1: wasn't using it. It was just taking up space. So 149 00:06:18,640 --> 00:06:20,520 Speaker 1: they may have done me a favor. So then it 150 00:06:20,600 --> 00:06:22,920 Speaker 1: may have been me being like you know what I mean, 151 00:06:22,960 --> 00:06:24,839 Speaker 1: It could have been me just being a prima donna 152 00:06:25,279 --> 00:06:28,760 Speaker 1: because maybe I'm married and my wife in this case, 153 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:30,840 Speaker 1: this guy Dante's wife had said to him one hundred times, 154 00:06:30,920 --> 00:06:33,479 Speaker 1: please clean this up. So I'm trying to look at 155 00:06:33,520 --> 00:06:34,320 Speaker 1: this on both sides. 156 00:06:34,360 --> 00:06:37,400 Speaker 4: Here, I'd say thank you if it was me, Like, 157 00:06:37,520 --> 00:06:40,400 Speaker 4: I'd be really upset about the stuff like his mom 158 00:06:40,480 --> 00:06:42,240 Speaker 4: gave him, and I feel like she should have known 159 00:06:42,360 --> 00:06:45,360 Speaker 4: better than to toss that. But outside of that, you 160 00:06:45,520 --> 00:06:47,920 Speaker 4: will come up with an excuse to keep every single 161 00:06:48,000 --> 00:06:50,200 Speaker 4: thing if you have a problem with hoarding, like I 162 00:06:50,400 --> 00:06:52,279 Speaker 4: would have been, Like, you know what, Actually I feel 163 00:06:52,320 --> 00:06:55,239 Speaker 4: a lot lighter. Thank you for going through and getting 164 00:06:55,320 --> 00:06:56,560 Speaker 4: rid of some of this stuff that I was having 165 00:06:56,560 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 4: a hard time letting go of. 166 00:06:58,040 --> 00:07:01,680 Speaker 1: Oh you're a better person than me, you do Oh no, no, no, 167 00:07:02,200 --> 00:07:06,280 Speaker 1: Like I, I would be very angry. At the very least, 168 00:07:06,320 --> 00:07:08,800 Speaker 1: she should have kept the stuff that she didn't think 169 00:07:08,880 --> 00:07:09,680 Speaker 1: that he needed. 170 00:07:09,840 --> 00:07:11,480 Speaker 5: Yes, in a bag in the garage in the corner, 171 00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:13,320 Speaker 5: you go through it later. If not, then then I 172 00:07:13,400 --> 00:07:15,080 Speaker 5: will donate it. If you're gonna be lazy and not 173 00:07:15,160 --> 00:07:16,480 Speaker 5: get to it, because sometimes you don't get to it 174 00:07:16,600 --> 00:07:19,520 Speaker 5: right and the excuses keep coming, then good will be 175 00:07:19,560 --> 00:07:21,680 Speaker 5: at the door to come pick it up. But at least, 176 00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:23,560 Speaker 5: like I wouldn't throw it out, Absolutely not. There are 177 00:07:23,600 --> 00:07:25,400 Speaker 5: so many things that I want to go into my basement. 178 00:07:25,440 --> 00:07:26,960 Speaker 5: You guys have been in my basement. It looks like 179 00:07:27,160 --> 00:07:29,440 Speaker 5: I don't even know, Like the Cubs Convention Center, Like 180 00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:30,640 Speaker 5: it's awful and there's just. 181 00:07:30,680 --> 00:07:32,840 Speaker 1: Like the Cubs through up in your basis they did. 182 00:07:32,920 --> 00:07:35,120 Speaker 5: It's it's wild and like, but there's also like things 183 00:07:35,160 --> 00:07:37,960 Speaker 5: from like Hobby's childhood and like things are important in baseball, 184 00:07:38,000 --> 00:07:39,720 Speaker 5: and it realizes a big, big baseball guy when he 185 00:07:39,800 --> 00:07:41,520 Speaker 5: was a kid, and like I would I want to 186 00:07:41,560 --> 00:07:43,480 Speaker 5: toss it's so bad, but like I won't touch it 187 00:07:43,520 --> 00:07:45,440 Speaker 5: because I know it means a lot to him. One 188 00:07:45,480 --> 00:07:48,080 Speaker 5: day it may go, but I would never you know, 189 00:07:48,360 --> 00:07:50,200 Speaker 5: have him come home and then like everything's missing, because 190 00:07:50,200 --> 00:07:51,080 Speaker 5: I feel like that's so mean. 191 00:07:51,200 --> 00:07:53,160 Speaker 1: And Paulina, that's the question. How many times do you 192 00:07:53,280 --> 00:07:55,360 Speaker 1: ask someone to do something before you do take it 193 00:07:55,440 --> 00:07:57,640 Speaker 1: into your own hands? Because if it were that important, 194 00:07:57,920 --> 00:07:59,600 Speaker 1: if you had stuff that was that important to you, 195 00:07:59,640 --> 00:08:02,760 Speaker 1: and I had to one hundred times, then is that 196 00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:04,560 Speaker 1: that kind of on you at some point? I'm playing 197 00:08:04,600 --> 00:08:06,240 Speaker 1: Devil's advocate here. I mean, I would be mad if 198 00:08:06,240 --> 00:08:08,640 Speaker 1: people threw my stuff away or donated it without asking me. 199 00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:11,080 Speaker 1: But how many times do we have to have this 200 00:08:11,200 --> 00:08:16,480 Speaker 1: conversation before it's like, Okay, I'm just gonna do this 201 00:08:16,640 --> 00:08:19,720 Speaker 1: because this is a shared space exactly, and I live 202 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:21,440 Speaker 1: here too, you know, And I don't know how many 203 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:23,640 Speaker 1: closets they have. Maybe they don't have a situation where 204 00:08:23,640 --> 00:08:26,480 Speaker 1: maybe they're sharing one closet, you know. So I mean again, 205 00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:28,760 Speaker 1: how many times you have to ask your significant other 206 00:08:28,840 --> 00:08:30,640 Speaker 1: to do something before you take it into your own hands, 207 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:33,600 Speaker 1: and then it's kind of at your own risk. Hey, Marrabelle, 208 00:08:33,600 --> 00:08:35,800 Speaker 1: how you doing good? How are you? 209 00:08:36,000 --> 00:08:36,520 Speaker 6: Good morning? 210 00:08:36,760 --> 00:08:36,880 Speaker 5: Hi? 211 00:08:37,120 --> 00:08:39,640 Speaker 1: So you just heard this thing. This guy Dante calls 212 00:08:39,679 --> 00:08:41,720 Speaker 1: in his wife while he was out of town, basically 213 00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:43,920 Speaker 1: went through all of his stuff in the closet, organized 214 00:08:43,960 --> 00:08:45,679 Speaker 1: it for him, but got rid of a ton of 215 00:08:45,720 --> 00:08:47,920 Speaker 1: stuff without consulting him. What would you do. 216 00:08:49,640 --> 00:08:52,480 Speaker 6: I completely understand where he's coming from. I mean, I 217 00:08:52,559 --> 00:08:54,679 Speaker 6: guess there was a lot of things of value to him, 218 00:08:54,720 --> 00:08:57,320 Speaker 6: and there are things that reminded him, you know, gave 219 00:08:57,400 --> 00:09:00,079 Speaker 6: them memories of his mother. So I completely understand and 220 00:09:00,160 --> 00:09:03,000 Speaker 6: why he could be so upset. But at the end 221 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:06,199 Speaker 6: of the day, I mean, she really meant well and 222 00:09:06,880 --> 00:09:10,200 Speaker 6: thought that she was doing something to help. I think 223 00:09:10,280 --> 00:09:13,520 Speaker 6: that it's not enough of a reason for you to separate. 224 00:09:14,800 --> 00:09:16,760 Speaker 6: You are in all your right to feel the way 225 00:09:16,800 --> 00:09:20,000 Speaker 6: that you do. Take some time to kind of like 226 00:09:20,320 --> 00:09:23,599 Speaker 6: you know, work through those problems which your partner. I 227 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:26,640 Speaker 6: feel like, you know, things are just things, their attachments. 228 00:09:27,080 --> 00:09:28,560 Speaker 6: At the end of the day, your mom is there 229 00:09:28,640 --> 00:09:31,600 Speaker 6: with you in spirit. There's other ways to remember her, 230 00:09:32,520 --> 00:09:34,840 Speaker 6: and I don't think that this is a good reason 231 00:09:34,960 --> 00:09:38,040 Speaker 6: for a separation, but definitely go to therapy, try to 232 00:09:38,120 --> 00:09:40,079 Speaker 6: work it out and try to find, you know, a 233 00:09:40,200 --> 00:09:42,600 Speaker 6: way for you guys to communicate a little bit better 234 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:45,280 Speaker 6: and so things like this don't continue to happen in 235 00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:45,760 Speaker 6: the future. 236 00:09:45,880 --> 00:09:47,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, thank you, Mary Belle, have a good day. 237 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:48,800 Speaker 6: Okay, thank you. 238 00:09:49,520 --> 00:09:51,319 Speaker 1: I mean, you know, the jacket he said didn't fit. 239 00:09:51,960 --> 00:09:53,760 Speaker 1: It's like, I don't know, maybe he is that guy 240 00:09:53,920 --> 00:09:57,079 Speaker 1: who it's every well, I got to keep that because 241 00:09:57,120 --> 00:09:59,560 Speaker 1: I mean I had that as a child or whatever. 242 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:01,520 Speaker 1: It's like, well, well, what are you going to do 243 00:10:01,600 --> 00:10:03,000 Speaker 1: with it? Well, I don't know, but it was mineus 244 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:05,040 Speaker 1: I you know, I can't throw that away. 245 00:10:05,320 --> 00:10:07,240 Speaker 6: But you don't ever have the right to go through 246 00:10:07,280 --> 00:10:10,480 Speaker 6: some stuff and throw it out, and that's their belongings. 247 00:10:10,840 --> 00:10:12,440 Speaker 6: I don't care how many times I asked you, I'm 248 00:10:12,480 --> 00:10:13,679 Speaker 6: not going to throw away your stuff. 249 00:10:15,760 --> 00:10:18,240 Speaker 1: Rosie, Hi, Rosie, how you doing, Hi? 250 00:10:18,520 --> 00:10:19,959 Speaker 7: Friends, I'm great at you. 251 00:10:20,200 --> 00:10:22,640 Speaker 1: Hey, Rosie, what are you going to do in this situation? 252 00:10:22,760 --> 00:10:25,320 Speaker 1: You come home, your husband went through your stuff, organize 253 00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:27,360 Speaker 1: it for you, cleaned it all up, but then he 254 00:10:27,440 --> 00:10:28,760 Speaker 1: threw some stuff away. What do you do? 255 00:10:29,080 --> 00:10:31,319 Speaker 7: No, No, absolutely not. 256 00:10:31,440 --> 00:10:32,000 Speaker 1: He's got to go. 257 00:10:33,600 --> 00:10:34,800 Speaker 7: Absolutely unacceptable. 258 00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:36,280 Speaker 2: It's not your stuff. 259 00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:37,280 Speaker 4: Now. 260 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:38,319 Speaker 1: How many are you married? 261 00:10:39,520 --> 00:10:40,160 Speaker 5: I'm a widow. 262 00:10:40,400 --> 00:10:41,000 Speaker 1: You're a widow. 263 00:10:41,040 --> 00:10:43,080 Speaker 6: Okay, for thirty years. 264 00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:46,719 Speaker 7: It's a wonderful man. And today I'm just thankful that 265 00:10:46,800 --> 00:10:49,040 Speaker 7: I had someone so amazing in my life for so long. 266 00:10:49,200 --> 00:10:51,439 Speaker 1: Well, that's no, that's very sweet. But how many times, though, 267 00:10:51,480 --> 00:10:53,760 Speaker 1: in the course of any relationship, how many times do 268 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:56,079 Speaker 1: you ask someone to do something before you have the 269 00:10:56,160 --> 00:10:58,040 Speaker 1: right to take it into your own hands? I mean, 270 00:10:58,160 --> 00:10:59,840 Speaker 1: is it five times? Is it ten, it is at twenty? 271 00:11:00,480 --> 00:11:02,520 Speaker 1: Or never? You just that's just you're just gonna have 272 00:11:02,559 --> 00:11:03,040 Speaker 1: to deal with it. 273 00:11:03,960 --> 00:11:05,599 Speaker 7: I mean, I think that there needs to be the 274 00:11:05,679 --> 00:11:09,040 Speaker 7: common respect in a relationship with the two people that 275 00:11:09,120 --> 00:11:12,040 Speaker 7: there has to be communication. There's some sort of either 276 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:17,480 Speaker 7: communication is lost in this relationship or she's just a 277 00:11:17,679 --> 00:11:23,320 Speaker 7: very selfish, militiative person. And I think that she really 278 00:11:23,360 --> 00:11:26,359 Speaker 7: needs to read the book Let them, because. 279 00:11:26,600 --> 00:11:29,800 Speaker 1: Let them be a nasty hoarder. Let them let them 280 00:11:29,840 --> 00:11:31,480 Speaker 1: have their stuff all over the place, let them keep 281 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:33,280 Speaker 1: that jacket that doesn't fit from their mama. 282 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:36,839 Speaker 7: Let them give them a bin to put under the bed. 283 00:11:37,640 --> 00:11:39,880 Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean there's there's Yeah, and Rosie, thank you 284 00:11:39,960 --> 00:11:41,480 Speaker 1: so much for calling for sharre and have a good day, 285 00:11:42,160 --> 00:11:43,840 Speaker 1: thank you. K Yeah, I mean there's definitely another way 286 00:11:43,880 --> 00:11:47,560 Speaker 1: to go about this. Hey, Christina, Hi, Hi, good morning 287 00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:49,880 Speaker 1: there go. What do you think so? 288 00:11:50,240 --> 00:11:52,880 Speaker 8: I mean, I think it's a little a little petty 289 00:11:52,960 --> 00:11:56,520 Speaker 8: to leave over this, But I my dad's a hoarder. 290 00:11:56,720 --> 00:11:58,480 Speaker 8: I feel like he might be a hoarder. It sounds 291 00:11:58,559 --> 00:12:01,040 Speaker 8: like with the emotion he has attacked to all the stuff, 292 00:12:02,280 --> 00:12:04,360 Speaker 8: he might be one. And he studies a pack rat. 293 00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:08,160 Speaker 8: But I lost a ton of stuff in my basement 294 00:12:08,200 --> 00:12:10,120 Speaker 8: a couple of years ago. My basement flooded a lot 295 00:12:10,200 --> 00:12:12,760 Speaker 8: of sentimental things, but things like I didn't use. It 296 00:12:12,880 --> 00:12:15,880 Speaker 8: was just in my basement, and it felt so good 297 00:12:16,360 --> 00:12:18,719 Speaker 8: to clear that stuff out. Like I didn't ask for 298 00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:21,040 Speaker 8: it to be tossed or anything. It just I lost 299 00:12:21,080 --> 00:12:24,760 Speaker 8: it because of the flood. But it was like it 300 00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:25,840 Speaker 8: felt good to get here. 301 00:12:26,000 --> 00:12:28,120 Speaker 1: Yeah, there is something very freeing about it. And I'm 302 00:12:28,160 --> 00:12:30,319 Speaker 1: sorry it happened under the under those circumstances because you 303 00:12:30,360 --> 00:12:32,240 Speaker 1: really weren't you didn't have the ability to sort of 304 00:12:32,280 --> 00:12:33,920 Speaker 1: pick and choose what you wanted to keep. But it 305 00:12:34,080 --> 00:12:36,880 Speaker 1: is very freeing when you when you're sort of a 306 00:12:37,040 --> 00:12:38,880 Speaker 1: massed a bit of a collection of things and you 307 00:12:38,960 --> 00:12:40,320 Speaker 1: were able to get rid of it, like it's it's 308 00:12:40,520 --> 00:12:42,560 Speaker 1: it is a super freeing thing. But but I mean, 309 00:12:42,600 --> 00:12:44,599 Speaker 1: I think part of the process is that you have 310 00:12:44,760 --> 00:12:47,480 Speaker 1: control over what goes and what comes. But to your point, 311 00:12:47,840 --> 00:12:51,760 Speaker 1: maybe this guy couldn't let go, like maybe he and 312 00:12:52,040 --> 00:12:53,960 Speaker 1: so I don't know, maybe there's a more serious issue here. 313 00:12:54,920 --> 00:12:57,120 Speaker 8: Yeah, I mean, and in the end, it's just stuff. 314 00:12:58,160 --> 00:13:00,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, but it's momsion, mom him the jacket, I mean 315 00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:02,680 Speaker 1: it was a it was a member's only jacket, Okay. 316 00:13:02,720 --> 00:13:05,880 Speaker 1: I mean it's like it was a Cowboys starter jacket. 317 00:13:05,880 --> 00:13:07,800 Speaker 1: All right, I mean those are those are very collectible 318 00:13:07,800 --> 00:13:10,520 Speaker 1: from the nineties. Alright, Thank you, Christina, have a good day, 319 00:13:11,160 --> 00:13:12,839 Speaker 1: Thank you too. It was a gold it was a 320 00:13:13,120 --> 00:13:15,240 Speaker 1: gold sparkles on it. I mean, come on, you know, 321 00:13:15,679 --> 00:13:17,079 Speaker 1: when he was in fifth grade, he was in the 322 00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:20,079 Speaker 1: dance you know thing, and and he did a dance 323 00:13:20,120 --> 00:13:22,839 Speaker 1: recital with it. His mom knit that. It was a 324 00:13:22,880 --> 00:13:26,640 Speaker 1: sweater knit by his mother. You mean he's dead, you know, 325 00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:28,920 Speaker 1: like what, You're never gonna be never to be knit again, 326 00:13:29,920 --> 00:13:31,360 Speaker 1: you know. Or you could go, I got it, go 327 00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:33,920 Speaker 1: to Goodwill and just shop for your own stuff. Maya 328 00:13:34,040 --> 00:13:41,640 Speaker 1: bag like it is this mom sweater. Seven dollars, that's 329 00:13:42,160 --> 00:13:42,800 Speaker 1: that's a deal.