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Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio

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Speaker 1: and the Black Effect Network.

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Speaker 2: So we're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion

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Speaker 2: who talks. What's up, y'alls? Your girl a j Holiday,

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Speaker 2: what's up Tam Damn, Hey girl, Hey girl.

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Speaker 3: I love y'all.

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Speaker 2: Thank y'all for coming back for another episode. I missed

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Speaker 2: y'all so much.

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Speaker 3: That was your weekend?

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Speaker 2: That eventful? I didn't do shit for real, you'll be lying.

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Speaker 4: And I missed a really nice event in Charleston on Sunday,

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Speaker 4: but I didn't.

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Speaker 2: I didn't get out the house for it.

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Speaker 4: I literally did nothing this weekend and I felt good

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Speaker 4: about it.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, sometimes that's what you need.

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Speaker 2: I paid bills, that's the most idea was put my

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Speaker 2: laptop out the payment lifebeling. Shit, Well that's all good.

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you what happened to me this weekend.

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Speaker 2: I just feel like shit, like it just be chaos, right,

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Speaker 2: like all right, I got so I haven't. I don't

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Speaker 2: move into my place in Charlotte until the first I

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Speaker 2: had to push it. They pushed it back till the first.

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Speaker 2: So that's my official movement and day I was supposed

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Speaker 2: to move in on Friday. So I ended up getting

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Speaker 2: the room for the night after work Friday night, and

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Speaker 2: I just got a room at the Double Tree uptown

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Speaker 2: right and I was tired. I left Columbia like six

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Speaker 2: in the morning. I got here eight and I worked

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Speaker 2: till eight at night. So now it's like almost nine.

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Speaker 2: I'm checking in my room. I'm like, I can't wait

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Speaker 2: till lay down and just eat my little burker.

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Speaker 3: I go in the room.

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Speaker 2: I opened the door, I walked, I stepped one foot

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Speaker 2: in the room and I slip on something and then

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Speaker 2: I filled the floor to get up and it's goo

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Speaker 2: something googy under me. And I was like, yeah, somebody's

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Speaker 2: dead in this motherfucker because I can't see it. I

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Speaker 2: haven't turned on the lights yet. The door closed behind me.

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Speaker 2: I'm like, there's a dead body in here.

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Speaker 3: I'm sure.

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Speaker 2: And then somebody's go somebody's gonna kill me in this bitch,

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Speaker 2: I know it.

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Speaker 3: And I left my pistol in the glove compartment, so

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Speaker 3: I did. I turned off the light. Girl, it's dukie

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Speaker 3: water all over.

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Speaker 2: The water bro like for the toilet. Oh my god,

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Speaker 2: this overflowed all over the floor, like in the doorway.

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Speaker 3: This it looks like. I don't know if it came

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Speaker 3: out to sink or the toilet. I don't know.

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Speaker 2: I didn't say to inspect. When I tell you, I

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Speaker 2: screamed to the top of my lungs. It probably sounds

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Speaker 2: like somebody was getting killed in because I was hollering,

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Speaker 2: dookie water girl.

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Speaker 3: And that girl.

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Speaker 2: I'm back in a boot, so I heard you. Yes,

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Speaker 2: I twisted my foot, the foot that I broke. I'm

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Speaker 2: back in a boot. Shut the fuck up. Yeah, I'm

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Speaker 2: back in the boot, looking crazy, looking fucking crazy out here.

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Speaker 3: Like a lawsuit.

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Speaker 2: Because what at least that's a girl girl.

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Speaker 3: What can you imagine? I got pictures. I gotta send

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Speaker 3: it to you.

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Speaker 2: It's I'm talking dookie water Fred Like I was like.

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Speaker 3: Like screaming, hollering, and then.

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Speaker 2: You need to go get a chat and shot. You

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Speaker 2: get a tetnic shot too. Yeah, they gave me a shot.

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Speaker 2: Like I went to the hospital. I went to the hospital.

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Speaker 2: They did X rays on my foot. I did not

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Speaker 2: rebreak the bone, but there is some injury in my

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Speaker 2: butt bone too, Like my butt and all this cushion.

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Speaker 2: You think I would be safe, No, the tailbone and telephone? Yeah,

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Speaker 2: so yeah.

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Speaker 3: That happened to me this weekend.

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Speaker 2: So then I was just laid up, you know, after

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Speaker 2: they had what the fucking fuck?

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Speaker 3: But you know, we at.

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Speaker 2: That age where like you really can't get an injury

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Speaker 2: at all because like injury ever. Yes, So that happened

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Speaker 2: to me, y'all. Dukie water at the double three? Was

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Speaker 2: that actual pieces of ship in it? It was just like

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Speaker 2: the it was dark. It was brown, like brown brown

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Speaker 2: like right exactly. Yeah, oh bitch, I can't do it.

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Speaker 2: Let them have it at that front desk, girl, y'all

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Speaker 2: know this happened like when was the last time I

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Speaker 2: was in this room? When was the last time was cleaned?

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Speaker 2: It like something exploded in there for sure, you know what,

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Speaker 2: probably wanted to cleaning people or somebody probably used that

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Speaker 2: restroom and then then realize it overflow and it looked like, yeah,

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Speaker 2: like somebody somebody exploded and it's something exploded. Oh hell no,

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Speaker 2: yees girl. So that was my weekend, y'all. What we

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Speaker 2: talk about today a little bit of shit.

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Speaker 4: Line, all right, So y'all, today we're breaking down how

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Speaker 4: everyday effort, chores, responsibility, showing up has become a whole

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Speaker 4: new love language.

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Speaker 2: Essentially in relationships. Don't you think I love a nigga

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Speaker 2: who clean up behind him?

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Speaker 3: I can't wait to get it in this one.

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Speaker 2: We got a special guest when we talked back this week.

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Speaker 2: We'll be back, go ahead, all right, yeah, so we'll

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Speaker 2: be right back with that guess.

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Speaker 4: All right, y'all, and we're back.

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Speaker 2: And quick question.

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Speaker 4: If your partner starts doing more around the house, cleaning, cooking,

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Speaker 4: helping out, does that make them more attractive?

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Speaker 2: Okay? Or are you like nigga, that's what the fuck

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Speaker 2: you're supposed to be doing. That's who I am, That's

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Speaker 2: what I'm okay. So today's guests wrote a book about it. Okay.

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Speaker 2: It's called chore Play, because apparently washing dishes is now

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Speaker 2: four play. Okay. So we do have comedian Jordan Carlos

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Speaker 2: on we talked back this week and we're talking relationships.

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Speaker 2: So he usually makes people laugh, but he's written a

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Speaker 2: book on how to save your relationship via doing your chores,

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Speaker 2: doing some shit around the house. I love this, Jordan Carlos.

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Speaker 5: I don't know if I was allowed to talk to Yeah,

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Speaker 5: I never okay, Okay, I always trying to I always

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Speaker 5: try to be very form of being. You got two

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Speaker 5: sisters on this podcast right now. Try to be very

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Speaker 5: respectful and know when I supposed to talk. I have

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Speaker 5: been married for almost nineteen years, so I have to

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Speaker 5: know when to speak, when it's allowed, when I'm allowed

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Speaker 5: to go. Thank you for having me. I really appreciate this,

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Speaker 5: Aja Tam, and thank you for commenting on my book. Yes, listen,

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Speaker 5: I wrote this book because we've just we've lost a

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Speaker 5: lot of good men out here, and I'm just trying

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Speaker 5: to help them out with some really kind of just

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Speaker 5: low hanging fruit, some real just easy hacks for around

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Speaker 5: the house and just stuff that you know, men should

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Speaker 5: probably be doing anyway, Yes, should be doing anyway for themselves,

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Speaker 5: just for themselves, right, And by virtue of that, by

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Speaker 5: doing things for yourself, it can have this kind of

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Speaker 5: like snowball effect where you know, you're not even trying

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Speaker 5: to impress your good life, lay your partner, whatever it is.

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Speaker 5: It's just like you're doing that for yourself. And then

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Speaker 5: like from that, from that, I found the outcome is

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Speaker 5: that yeah, you can, you can smash more so, which

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Speaker 5: has been great. I mean a guy like me that's

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Speaker 5: just eighteen going on nineteen seasons in We're always happy

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Speaker 5: for that, you.

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Speaker 4: Know, yeah, because you can see clutter around the room

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Speaker 4: in the dark.

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Speaker 2: I don't want to smash in this.

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Speaker 5: I'm sorry, right truly, truly, I mean there are sure

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Speaker 5: there are times like in my twenties college age, like

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Speaker 5: that didn't really matter. It was passion, you know what

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Speaker 5: I'm saying, So like that that is, that's true. But

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Speaker 5: what's cut in your twenties is not cute in your forties.

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Speaker 5: And that's kind of what that book, this book is about,

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Speaker 5: is that things change, they do, and you have to

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Speaker 5: be you have to be ready for that change, and

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Speaker 5: you have to be ready for that new like operating system,

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Speaker 5: because let's just say in the book, like we update

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Speaker 5: our phones every way two weeks, we got to get

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Speaker 5: a new operating system whatever it is, you know, so

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Speaker 5: it's like go, you know, like, of course logically you

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Speaker 5: need to update what your partnership is as well and

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Speaker 5: what that will look like.

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Speaker 2: And like an epiphany or were you just getting in

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Speaker 2: trouble at home? You ain't getting no cooochie like you

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Speaker 2: was like what are you let me get a mop?

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Speaker 3: Like what happened? How did the book?

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Speaker 5: I mean, we tried all the things. You know, you

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Speaker 5: try all the things, right, you try therapy like out

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Speaker 5: a network therapist, which is just like twohn of dollars

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Speaker 5: an hour, and you're like talking in circles and you're

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Speaker 5: trying to do better. But what I found was mostly

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Speaker 5: like what was the change agent? Was like vibe. Changing

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Speaker 5: vibe was really important for me. I mean I understand

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Speaker 5: like when I was a kid, I used to have

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Speaker 5: like up on the wall, my mom would put like,

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Speaker 5: you know, if you clean your room and do the

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Speaker 5: dishes and do your chores, like you get gold stars

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Speaker 5: and that means you'll get your allowance and things like that. Right,

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Speaker 5: So I was like, I mean that's cool, but I'm

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Speaker 5: not twelve anymore, right, So I didn't want to have

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Speaker 5: such a rigid structure to like my behavior. And that's

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Speaker 5: one part. The other part was why, the why factor? Right,

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Speaker 5: So that inflection point came from just I mean at

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Speaker 5: year ten and then the women in their forties, they

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Speaker 5: just want to talk to the manager. They want to

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Speaker 5: talk to the manager. There's so many notes they have, right,

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Speaker 5: I mean, listen manager, I mean like the manager of life, right,

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Speaker 5: like they took a full inventory restock, whether it's career.

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Speaker 5: It's family. It's like dead weight friends. Like they're like,

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Speaker 5: I'm not doing this anymore. Perimenopause and menopause has entered

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Speaker 5: the chat and so they get very serious and like

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Speaker 5: and you and believe me, you are up for review

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Speaker 5: as a man, you were up for review. So that

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Speaker 5: was definitely a part of it. I saw a lot

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Speaker 5: of people in my circles like getting divorced. I had

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Speaker 5: a divorce in our FA that was very close on.

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Speaker 5: I have front row seats to that, and like just

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Speaker 5: learning that the very unsexy ways that and undramatic ways

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Speaker 5: that a marriage can come apart, and seeing that firsthand,

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Speaker 5: I was like, Okay, people can be role models. This

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Speaker 5: person's a role model for me. I'm gonna do the

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Speaker 5: opposite of that, you know. So so it was definitely

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Speaker 5: like it wasn't anything dramatic. It was just like my

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Speaker 5: wife feeling as though she was alone in doing all

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Speaker 5: the things, doing all the things. You know. So, so

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Speaker 5: that was enough. That's yeah, after a while, that can

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Speaker 5: that can be enough? You this It's gonna be like

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Speaker 5: some Tyler Perry level excitement. That's not it.

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Speaker 3: How did go ahead? You get a question?

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Speaker 2: So in a nutshell. So our listeners understand who have

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Speaker 2: not read chor Play, give us a quick like not

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Speaker 2: a whole summary, but like a quick synopsis of what

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Speaker 2: choor Play is about.

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Speaker 5: Okay, chort Play is about all of the money that

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Speaker 5: you are leaving on the table that can like correct

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Speaker 5: a lot of what's going on that might be going

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Speaker 5: south into relationship. So, whether it's like making sure that

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Speaker 5: your side of the room is clean, the dishes are done,

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Speaker 5: whatever it is, these kind of small house items that

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Speaker 5: seem not important after a long period of time and

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Speaker 5: on a long timeline, they are very important and they

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Speaker 5: can mean the unraveling of a relationship. So this is

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Speaker 5: about this book is about taking those things more seriously

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Speaker 5: and then also seeing that they have this kind of

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Speaker 5: unexpected outcome, which was an improved sex life as well.

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Speaker 5: So that's basically what the book is about. And it's

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Speaker 5: about doing the least amount to get the most. Because

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Speaker 5: the bar I'm to put it out here, I don't

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Speaker 5: know if I feel like I'm man explaining this, but

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Speaker 5: the bar for men and straight relationships as in hell.

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Speaker 5: Well it's in hell, and we still trip it over it.

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Speaker 5: We are still tripping over it. Somehow, So just like

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Speaker 5: I feel like I got struck by lightning a little bit,

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Speaker 5: like I shouldn't be married, but I am, you know

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Speaker 5: what I mean, Like I'm still alive, but I am.

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Speaker 5: But we're not gonna talk about that, you know, but

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Speaker 5: I am. And I'm here to report and just thank god,

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Speaker 5: I'm just putting. It's just about putting people on game

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Speaker 5: to things that they might not have like noticed before.

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Speaker 5: And that's it because a lot of it is like

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Speaker 5: what you're socialized to do, you know, and what you're

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Speaker 5: taught to do verbally nonverbally. Like for instance, every Thanksgiving,

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Speaker 5: I love how my family comes together. It's an amazing

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Speaker 5: like Southern Thanksgiving and we our family from New Orleans

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Speaker 5: comes up. By the way, AJM like good food, right,

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Speaker 5: so it's really good. Anyway, Yes, we got I love

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Speaker 5: my New Orleans family. Like for people listening, I don't

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Speaker 5: know why a j randomly it was that before that,

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Speaker 5: I don't anyway, it was before we were rolling. But anyway,

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Speaker 5: the point is after the meal is done. What I

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Speaker 5: saw was like all the teenage girls have to watch

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Speaker 5: the dishes, but the teenage boys then watch the Cowboys game. Right,

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Speaker 5: So it's like it's kind of crazy and like that

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Speaker 5: just happens. And this year, like we were like we

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Speaker 5: kind of we kind of embarrassed boys. We're like, get

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Speaker 5: in here and watch the dishes, and they're like, huh,

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Speaker 5: what dochhes? Never seen one? You know, like acting dumb,

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Speaker 5: you know, And that's just that is kind of what

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Speaker 5: I saw. These patterns forming, and how we're channeling kids

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Speaker 5: to do certain things or what you know, what's expected

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Speaker 5: of them can ultimately just have like a horrible effect,

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Speaker 5: I think, just like it can. It can erode and

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Speaker 5: undercut a relationship because you're you if you expect a

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Speaker 5: woman just to clean up for you while you watch

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Speaker 5: the game, just because I mean you're you're, you're gonna

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Speaker 5: be on thin ice a lot of timeline, you go

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Speaker 5: be on thin ice.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that brings me to a story I remember on Sundays,

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Speaker 2: Football Sundays, which is my boyfriend at the time. That

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Speaker 2: was his day, like I want to watch football all day. Cool,

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Speaker 2: that's fine, you know, I'm gonna watch housewives, you watch football?

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Speaker 3: Cool, whatever.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but he would do this thing where he would

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Speaker 2: when he was finished with his beer, he'd be like

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Speaker 2: bee and then just hold a beer in the air

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Speaker 2: and shake the motherfucker bottle. He wouldn't say, hey, can

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Speaker 2: you give me another beer please? He just hold that

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Speaker 2: bitch in the air.

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Speaker 3: And shake it.

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Speaker 4: Hey, girlfriend, Wow, my son does that.

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Speaker 5: But he's like seven years old. He does it from

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Speaker 5: the back seat the juice box, you know what I'm saying.

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Speaker 5: And we're always like, I'm like, I'm your butler, you know.

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Speaker 5: But I've been like, you need to hold onto that

280
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Speaker 5: until we get to a trash can you need to

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Speaker 5: hold onto that? Like, I think it's so funny that

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Speaker 5: you say that time. I'm not trying to. I mean,

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Speaker 5: I will only go on speak on myself. Right. So,

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Speaker 5: I'm a Cowboys fan. I don't know why I spend

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Speaker 5: so much time watching the Cowboys just do okay, They're

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Speaker 5: like okay, then they choke and it's like some fan,

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Speaker 5: look some teams. I get it right, if the teams

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Speaker 5: are great, Like if you were a Pats fan during

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Speaker 5: the twenty tens and things like that, yes, you're gonna

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Speaker 5: be glued to the couch the Cowboys fan. What am

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Speaker 5: I doing? What are Jets fans doing? Every Sunday? You

292
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Speaker 5: should be out in nature. You should be out like

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Speaker 5: a farmer. Whatever it is. Yeah, you should be you know,

294
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Speaker 5: whatever it is, Go do something, go outside, touch grass,

295
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Speaker 5: whatever it is, go to the beach whatever, like, yeah, chop,

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Speaker 5: do something, do that project you said you were gonna

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Speaker 5: do around the house. Because the jets don't need you.

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Speaker 5: Believe me, they don't need you to do bad. They

299
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Speaker 5: can do bad off by themselves. So I wasted all

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Speaker 5: that time watching them. But I will say for the

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Speaker 5: couch thing, I was out of shape too, so the

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Speaker 5: getting up from the couch, because the nicer the couch

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Speaker 5: you have, the more it's you sink into it. And

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Speaker 5: I had to reverse that. I was like when I

305
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Speaker 5: found out at the gym, like I found out about

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Speaker 5: kipping and hip thrust. I was like, oh okay, so now.

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Speaker 2: Hip thrusts coming right, we come through with the good

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Speaker 2: back and hip thrust bush ups too.

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Speaker 3: Because nigga laying on you like this, lay it up,

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Speaker 3: I guess you.

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Speaker 4: I literally asked people for pictures of a forearm.

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Speaker 2: Okay, let me, I'm looking for a particular thing.

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Speaker 5: Wow, amazing. I'm not gonna I'm not gonna add to

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Speaker 5: that joke, but I feel I got you. I got you. Well,

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Speaker 5: let me just say that. That's something I work on

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Speaker 5: a lot. We work on our plank pose. So it's like,

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Speaker 5: so I feel like what I'm saying is like getting

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Speaker 5: up from the couch. Yes, so many ways. This is

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Speaker 5: Swiss army knife, so so many ways, like getting up

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Speaker 5: from the couch. If you don't want to get up right,

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Speaker 5: if you can't get up physically every time you're down

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Speaker 5: like that, if you can't get up quickly, then when

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Speaker 5: you're asked to get up, what happens attitude, right, like

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Speaker 5: coming up with different reasons why you shouldn't do the thing.

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Speaker 5: So like that I didn't even you know, I like

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Speaker 5: stumbled on all this. So I found out that like

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Speaker 5: having a fit body meant that like I could get

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Speaker 5: up and I could do the things that my wife

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Speaker 5: needed me to do, right if she asked me to

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Speaker 5: do this, that and the third no problem, no friction,

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Speaker 5: no problem, because then I could quickly pop back on

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Speaker 5: the couch and do whatever. And yeah, I just I

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Speaker 5: feel like in that case with your man, I'm so

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Speaker 5: sorry about that. That's the.

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Speaker 4: Talk about the asking part, because I have to ask

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Speaker 4: you to be an adult, right, And I kind of

337
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Speaker 4: liking this to like yeah, couples having babies probably out

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Speaker 4: of wedlock, right, and mama automatically knows to be a mama, right,

339
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Speaker 4: it's just natural her natural. But then the young man

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Speaker 4: might feel like, you know, he's being mothered by her

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Speaker 4: because she has to tell him with me, because he

342
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Speaker 4: does not innately know what to do. I think most

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Speaker 4: men at some point probably live on their own. What

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Speaker 4: were you doing in your own house to where you

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Speaker 4: think that now you could habitate when a woman you

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Speaker 4: don't have to clean up at all?

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Speaker 5: I think you know that's where like money and capitalism

348
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Speaker 5: gets in the way, right, So like I was making

349
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Speaker 5: I make still make good money, and it's like and

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Speaker 5: I was thinking that like that would absolve me of

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Speaker 5: my responsibilities because I had seen that with my dad.

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Speaker 5: My dad's a very successful doctor, and my dad was

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Speaker 5: actually like at a time in Texas was also like

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Speaker 5: at least the four word chapter was was heading up

355
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Speaker 5: like planned parenthood, planned parenthood and fortward. But when he

356
00:18:51,200 --> 00:18:54,119
Speaker 5: and he's a obg wan. But when he got home,

357
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Speaker 5: like he cared for women all day long? Do you understand?

358
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Speaker 2: So I can hear your mama mout right now?

359
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Speaker 5: Boy, when he got home that was it no more? Yeah, yeah,

360
00:19:09,520 --> 00:19:11,680
Speaker 5: that was one too many women. So he like so

361
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Speaker 5: he'd be home like in his bvds, you know, watch

362
00:19:15,400 --> 00:19:18,159
Speaker 5: in ESPN, got a steak on his belly, just eating,

363
00:19:18,800 --> 00:19:22,240
Speaker 5: got the beer like whatever, like that was that was him.

364
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Speaker 5: So I was like, Okay, no one's explaining this or

365
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:29,480
Speaker 5: saying this to me. You're just seeing it, right. So

366
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Speaker 5: I'm like, this is a guy that is well regarded

367
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Speaker 5: in the community, at church, in his family. This is

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Speaker 5: what I want. This is the prototype. I just need

369
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Speaker 5: to emulate this. So that's what I did with comedy.

370
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Speaker 5: I emulated that. And then it was like thinking, Okay,

371
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Speaker 5: so if I make money and handle all bills and

372
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Speaker 5: like make everything, I'll right pay for everything. Then I

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Speaker 5: don't have to do anything right. And so that was

374
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Speaker 5: my mindset, and that's why I feel like it got

375
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Speaker 5: to a point like when we first started dating each other,

376
00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:03,360
Speaker 5: wasn't like I wasn't looking to her looking for her

377
00:20:03,359 --> 00:20:07,400
Speaker 5: to do like like domestic stuff, or I wasn't looking

378
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Speaker 5: for her to mother me in anyway. But that's this

379
00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:12,240
Speaker 5: part of me that like kicks in, Like I had

380
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Speaker 5: to get over that, the need to make women mother me,

381
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Speaker 5: you know, like which is which is crazy? So once you,

382
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Speaker 5: I mean, cut that that umbilical cord like for real,

383
00:20:25,840 --> 00:20:30,639
Speaker 5: for real, and stop like keeping things clean around the

384
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Speaker 5: house so mommy doesn't get mad at you, right or

385
00:20:35,320 --> 00:20:37,480
Speaker 5: or whatever it is, and have your own standard.

386
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Speaker 4: Cleaning for yourself, like yeah, your own standard.

387
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Speaker 2: Like I just don't understand, like why a man wouldn't

388
00:20:42,880 --> 00:20:45,200
Speaker 2: have Some men do like my dad. And I look

389
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Speaker 2: for men like my dad because my dad is a

390
00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:51,480
Speaker 2: very clean man, right, so I know it's possible. So

391
00:20:51,840 --> 00:20:54,199
Speaker 2: when I run across somebody who thinks like and everybody

392
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Speaker 2: has a different level of planes, right, there's a base level,

393
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Speaker 2: and then some people like you in the breakfast club

394
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Speaker 2: and how Charlamagne said that women clean the bathroom better.

395
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Speaker 2: So a man has told me that living in the

396
00:21:06,880 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 2: house with me, like he let his he let his

397
00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:12,640
Speaker 2: bathroom get so deplorable because I no longer would share

398
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Speaker 2: bathrooms with him, and he let it get so bad.

399
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:16,679
Speaker 2: And then he asked me if I could clean it

400
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Speaker 2: for him.

401
00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:21,840
Speaker 5: Yes, no, yes, I mean you can outsource.

402
00:21:22,359 --> 00:21:24,879
Speaker 2: Yeah, you could bring another bitch in here and literal

403
00:21:24,880 --> 00:21:27,400
Speaker 2: clean your nasty bathroom. Or I might put that bathroom

404
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:30,399
Speaker 2: on Facebook or Instagram so people can see how you living.

405
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Speaker 3: Yes, but I think that's a lot of men. Though,

406
00:21:33,800 --> 00:21:35,000
Speaker 3: that's a lot of men.

407
00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:38,240
Speaker 2: I remember used to have like, yeah, he on the

408
00:21:38,280 --> 00:21:40,480
Speaker 2: floor around the toilet sometimes slid.

409
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Speaker 5: What was this the same guy?

410
00:21:45,520 --> 00:21:48,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, same guy, same guy, And they used to have

411
00:21:48,480 --> 00:21:52,200
Speaker 2: like this is gonna get gross. Used to have ship

412
00:21:52,280 --> 00:21:54,359
Speaker 2: in the toilet and then like cubes on it so

413
00:21:54,400 --> 00:21:55,400
Speaker 2: it looked like a Teddy Bear.

414
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Speaker 5: Yeap, gross. What he didn't have the brush, He didn't

415
00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:03,800
Speaker 5: have the toilet brush.

416
00:22:04,080 --> 00:22:06,119
Speaker 3: He did, but he just didn't didn't use it, use

417
00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:06,840
Speaker 3: it or flushed.

418
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Speaker 2: So I do blame the moms.

419
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Speaker 4: And I'm and if my sister's good. My nephew just

420
00:22:13,920 --> 00:22:17,160
Speaker 4: went to college, and I'm so concerned about him having

421
00:22:17,160 --> 00:22:20,159
Speaker 4: a roommate, knowing how he was raised to not have

422
00:22:20,240 --> 00:22:23,200
Speaker 4: to do anything right. I'm concerned about him now having

423
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Speaker 4: to cohabitate and like.

424
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:29,199
Speaker 2: Not being the cleanest right. And you're uh, and he

425
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Speaker 2: plays football.

426
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Speaker 4: And now people on your team talking about you.

427
00:22:33,880 --> 00:22:36,520
Speaker 2: I'm so concerned about that because I watched them not

428
00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:38,760
Speaker 2: have to do a new thing.

429
00:22:39,040 --> 00:22:39,919
Speaker 5: I remember once I.

430
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Speaker 2: Made him take the trash out and he was like,

431
00:22:42,359 --> 00:22:45,080
Speaker 2: you know, because he said that the professional millionaire he plays,

432
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Speaker 2: he's planning to go to the NFL.

433
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Speaker 5: Right, Oh wow amazing.

434
00:22:47,680 --> 00:22:49,359
Speaker 2: He was like, Yeah, when.

435
00:22:49,240 --> 00:22:51,200
Speaker 4: I get older, I'm only going to give people money

436
00:22:51,200 --> 00:22:52,679
Speaker 4: who was nice to me or some ship like that,

437
00:22:52,720 --> 00:22:54,879
Speaker 4: because I asked him to take the trash out. So

438
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:58,359
Speaker 4: now you're you are raising a man that is really

439
00:22:58,359 --> 00:22:59,080
Speaker 4: going to want.

440
00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:03,719
Speaker 5: Absolutely a few years like it's gonna go sour. Right. So,

441
00:23:04,760 --> 00:23:06,520
Speaker 5: because what I found, and I'm not an expert by

442
00:23:06,560 --> 00:23:09,520
Speaker 5: any means, but I've found that like romantic love can

443
00:23:09,560 --> 00:23:12,359
Speaker 5: get a marriage to like ten years, right, but past

444
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:14,760
Speaker 5: that you could still have so much love for the person.

445
00:23:14,800 --> 00:23:16,480
Speaker 5: But if they are a mess, they are a mess,

446
00:23:16,560 --> 00:23:19,920
Speaker 5: right And and yes, for me, it was like this,

447
00:23:20,080 --> 00:23:21,800
Speaker 5: Like when I was nineteen, I had a really bad

448
00:23:21,840 --> 00:23:23,680
Speaker 5: fall out with my mom and it was about independence.

449
00:23:23,720 --> 00:23:25,879
Speaker 5: It was actually about independence. I wanted to move to

450
00:23:25,960 --> 00:23:28,480
Speaker 5: the big bad city, New York City, and I wanted

451
00:23:28,480 --> 00:23:30,800
Speaker 5: to like intern for deaf Champ and she wouldn't let

452
00:23:30,840 --> 00:23:32,080
Speaker 5: me do it, so I did it. Anyway. We had

453
00:23:32,119 --> 00:23:34,000
Speaker 5: a huge falling up, but it actually kind of in

454
00:23:34,040 --> 00:23:36,639
Speaker 5: a way was helpful because I had to become independent

455
00:23:37,040 --> 00:23:39,159
Speaker 5: because there was no Mom wasn't gonna send me a

456
00:23:39,240 --> 00:23:41,159
Speaker 5: care package. She wasn't gonna check up on me. I

457
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:42,679
Speaker 5: had to get my own apartment, I had to do

458
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,359
Speaker 5: my own laundry. I had to do all these things.

459
00:23:44,359 --> 00:23:46,719
Speaker 5: So it just really kicked me in the butt. But like,

460
00:23:47,560 --> 00:23:50,439
Speaker 5: can women clean better than men? Maybe? But they've been

461
00:23:50,560 --> 00:23:51,960
Speaker 5: left to do it, you know what I'm saying, Like

462
00:23:52,119 --> 00:23:54,359
Speaker 5: men have taken all the other jobs. I was like, yes,

463
00:23:54,480 --> 00:23:56,920
Speaker 5: I guess so. So it's like that's that's what they're

464
00:23:56,960 --> 00:23:59,760
Speaker 5: able to do because men have taken everything else.

465
00:23:59,840 --> 00:24:04,280
Speaker 2: Right, So I mean, you don't believe in any gender

466
00:24:04,359 --> 00:24:08,320
Speaker 2: roles because I don't want to cut no grass and

467
00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:10,160
Speaker 2: and I don't want to wash no car. I don't

468
00:24:10,160 --> 00:24:12,200
Speaker 2: want to put no gas and do all that shit.

469
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:16,000
Speaker 5: I believe, listen, I believe in doing I do. I

470
00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:19,359
Speaker 5: don't do that much, right, but it seems like a lot.

471
00:24:19,560 --> 00:24:21,480
Speaker 5: Of course. I handle the car like I write in

472
00:24:21,480 --> 00:24:23,640
Speaker 5: the book that I handle all things about the car, uh,

473
00:24:23,800 --> 00:24:26,880
Speaker 5: cleaning the car, like taking it in for whatever maintenance

474
00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:29,359
Speaker 5: that's due, whatever this that, and the third Fortunately, I

475
00:24:29,400 --> 00:24:31,600
Speaker 5: live in a city. I live in a townhouse. There

476
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:34,119
Speaker 5: is no backyard really to speak of. So it's like

477
00:24:34,160 --> 00:24:35,560
Speaker 5: you don't have to really take care of that much.

478
00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:38,280
Speaker 5: I do the gardening in the summertime, just like the

479
00:24:38,280 --> 00:24:40,760
Speaker 5: trimming and things like that, but like when it comes

480
00:24:40,800 --> 00:24:43,959
Speaker 5: to but that's like for a season or two, right,

481
00:24:44,040 --> 00:24:46,960
Speaker 5: so summer spring, that's all you gotta do. Think about

482
00:24:47,000 --> 00:24:50,760
Speaker 5: the daily grind though, of like laundry, food, all this, this,

483
00:24:50,760 --> 00:24:53,520
Speaker 5: this that and the other, like my wife needs help

484
00:24:54,119 --> 00:24:57,760
Speaker 5: and those kind of things. I think people are falling

485
00:24:57,800 --> 00:24:59,800
Speaker 5: short on. I know I was falling short on. So

486
00:24:59,840 --> 00:25:01,840
Speaker 5: it's like that's where I'm I'm picking it up and

487
00:25:01,840 --> 00:25:03,960
Speaker 5: I kind of gamify it now, like I I if

488
00:25:04,000 --> 00:25:06,719
Speaker 5: I see something on the stairs, pick that the hell up,

489
00:25:07,240 --> 00:25:10,600
Speaker 5: get it downstairs. It will take no walk, don't walk

490
00:25:10,640 --> 00:25:13,760
Speaker 5: past it. But there. As I describe in the book,

491
00:25:13,760 --> 00:25:16,280
Speaker 5: there is something called U s A. This is is

492
00:25:16,440 --> 00:25:20,440
Speaker 5: unconscious uh selective attention. This is a real thing right

493
00:25:20,720 --> 00:25:22,600
Speaker 5: where it's like you can see like if you close

494
00:25:22,640 --> 00:25:24,439
Speaker 5: one eye, you can see your nose, and if you

495
00:25:24,440 --> 00:25:26,080
Speaker 5: close the other eye, you can see your nose. But

496
00:25:26,080 --> 00:25:28,040
Speaker 5: if you open both eyes, you can't see your nose.

497
00:25:28,600 --> 00:25:31,720
Speaker 5: That is because the brain just ignores the nose.

498
00:25:33,080 --> 00:25:38,880
Speaker 3: See all day I see that.

499
00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:45,960
Speaker 5: Yes, you're the first person I've ever met. You have

500
00:25:46,040 --> 00:25:50,200
Speaker 5: a very nice nose, like very nice. Everybody got nice noses.

501
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:52,359
Speaker 5: I don't have a my nose like a bo Cosmi nose.

502
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:56,120
Speaker 5: But like, but I will say this, like, but your

503
00:25:56,119 --> 00:26:01,200
Speaker 5: brain ignores things. So it's like what are you socialized

504
00:26:01,200 --> 00:26:04,240
Speaker 5: to ignore or ignore? Right? As men, we are socialized

505
00:26:04,240 --> 00:26:06,399
Speaker 5: to ignore stuff on the floor, the legos, that this,

506
00:26:06,560 --> 00:26:11,120
Speaker 5: that like, the piles of clothes, the everything around us. Right,

507
00:26:11,200 --> 00:26:13,879
Speaker 5: our brain is telling us to do this when.

508
00:26:13,720 --> 00:26:15,240
Speaker 3: It comes to the table. So I know what you're

509
00:26:15,240 --> 00:26:15,760
Speaker 3: talking about.

510
00:26:19,800 --> 00:26:23,119
Speaker 5: It wasn't even there, like whatever, what are you talking about?

511
00:26:24,600 --> 00:26:27,200
Speaker 5: So there are things we got it like, so if

512
00:26:27,240 --> 00:26:29,160
Speaker 5: I know that, then I know that there are things

513
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:31,919
Speaker 5: that I can unlearn, right, and I can unlearn like

514
00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:36,679
Speaker 5: just pick it up, like if if if like there's laundry,

515
00:26:36,840 --> 00:26:39,320
Speaker 5: there's and the and the washing machine is done, just

516
00:26:39,400 --> 00:26:42,159
Speaker 5: put it in the dryer. Just do it, bro. And

517
00:26:42,200 --> 00:26:45,680
Speaker 5: it's it's like all about getting into active mode, right

518
00:26:45,720 --> 00:26:47,720
Speaker 5: instead of ready mode. You got to get into active mode.

519
00:26:48,320 --> 00:26:50,919
Speaker 5: And I feel like a lot of guys are in

520
00:26:50,960 --> 00:26:53,560
Speaker 5: ready mode, Like we're always like like we work out.

521
00:26:53,600 --> 00:26:55,800
Speaker 5: So it's like I wish, I wish someone would try

522
00:26:55,840 --> 00:26:58,200
Speaker 5: me right, Like, so I can live this John Wick

523
00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 5: fantasy out right. But like but like where we have

524
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:06,320
Speaker 5: to just like stop with the readiness, stop with the preparedness,

525
00:27:06,320 --> 00:27:09,440
Speaker 5: and just activate, like and I don't think it really

526
00:27:09,480 --> 00:27:11,919
Speaker 5: takes that much. It just takes doing small things and

527
00:27:11,960 --> 00:27:17,600
Speaker 5: then like eventually, gradually you will be more active. And

528
00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:19,479
Speaker 5: and a part of that also is just like you

529
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:24,479
Speaker 5: have to not look for outside validation, not wait for

530
00:27:24,520 --> 00:27:26,760
Speaker 5: your girl or anybody to like pat you on the

531
00:27:26,800 --> 00:27:28,600
Speaker 5: back for it, but just pat yourself on the back

532
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:30,120
Speaker 5: for it. You know, That's what it is.

533
00:27:30,680 --> 00:27:32,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, what is that though?

534
00:27:32,359 --> 00:27:37,000
Speaker 4: What is that wanting like to have this admiration you know,

535
00:27:37,119 --> 00:27:41,679
Speaker 4: from another person simply because you you know, you wash

536
00:27:41,760 --> 00:27:47,400
Speaker 4: the dishes today, Like, hey baby, I noticed you wash

537
00:27:47,480 --> 00:27:48,280
Speaker 4: the dishes today.

538
00:27:48,400 --> 00:27:52,159
Speaker 2: You want your dick suckt? Why do we have to

539
00:27:52,480 --> 00:27:55,359
Speaker 2: want like they just want big rewards?

540
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:59,240
Speaker 5: But like so have you you know, I'm dying right now.

541
00:27:59,480 --> 00:28:00,359
Speaker 5: I'm dying right now.

542
00:28:00,960 --> 00:28:04,720
Speaker 2: She said, your top taar man is just an average woman,

543
00:28:05,640 --> 00:28:12,200
Speaker 2: and I like that. Men think they really do. It's

544
00:28:12,240 --> 00:28:15,159
Speaker 2: like basically, and then when you add differently.

545
00:28:16,080 --> 00:28:18,520
Speaker 4: My ex said, I would build Rico cases, and I'm

546
00:28:18,520 --> 00:28:21,440
Speaker 4: a Gemini. I'm not a nag, right, because I feel

547
00:28:21,440 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 4: like if I ask you to do something, if you

548
00:28:23,280 --> 00:28:25,800
Speaker 4: ask me as my partner to do something, you only

549
00:28:25,880 --> 00:28:28,879
Speaker 4: have to ask me one time, and I'm going to acquiesce,

550
00:28:29,000 --> 00:28:32,560
Speaker 4: you know what if it's basile mm hmm. But sometimes

551
00:28:32,560 --> 00:28:34,720
Speaker 4: with men like you have to keep asking them something

552
00:28:34,920 --> 00:28:37,560
Speaker 4: like a child, and then now they're acting as if

553
00:28:37,600 --> 00:28:38,560
Speaker 4: you're nagging them.

554
00:28:38,720 --> 00:28:40,320
Speaker 2: Yes, right, so I'm not a nag.

555
00:28:40,520 --> 00:28:42,640
Speaker 4: I asked you one time, and then I added to

556
00:28:42,680 --> 00:28:44,320
Speaker 4: the rico, right.

557
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:48,800
Speaker 5: You yeah, okay, okay.

558
00:28:48,560 --> 00:28:52,320
Speaker 4: You a sticky note on that, nigga. Okay, that's what

559
00:28:52,400 --> 00:28:52,960
Speaker 4: I'm putting.

560
00:28:52,960 --> 00:28:54,760
Speaker 2: A sticky note on this, a sticky note on that,

561
00:28:54,880 --> 00:28:58,120
Speaker 2: and tell me, even when I'm not doing it, I'm trying.

562
00:28:58,200 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 2: I'm like, what is that a stept from your son?

563
00:29:01,360 --> 00:29:03,280
Speaker 2: If your son would to say, well, no, I didn't

564
00:29:03,320 --> 00:29:05,240
Speaker 2: do it. But even when I'm not doing it, I'm

565
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:06,080
Speaker 2: trying to do it.

566
00:29:07,880 --> 00:29:10,920
Speaker 5: I think it's I think what we need. I think

567
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:16,160
Speaker 5: man man, shit man, math man. Truly, truly, truly. I

568
00:29:16,160 --> 00:29:18,760
Speaker 5: think it's just like you can rationalize anything. You can

569
00:29:18,840 --> 00:29:22,360
Speaker 5: rationalize anything, but it's like integrity is everything, right, It's

570
00:29:22,400 --> 00:29:24,960
Speaker 5: just like you know, integrity, doing what you're supposed to

571
00:29:25,000 --> 00:29:28,160
Speaker 5: do when nobody is watching you, right, So, like if

572
00:29:28,160 --> 00:29:32,320
Speaker 5: you know that she said to do whatever chore it

573
00:29:32,440 --> 00:29:35,040
Speaker 5: was she asked you to do, you heard it, you

574
00:29:35,160 --> 00:29:38,320
Speaker 5: know it. If it's a second time thing where she's

575
00:29:38,360 --> 00:29:41,760
Speaker 5: like reminding you, like just say I'm sorry, yeah, I'll

576
00:29:41,800 --> 00:29:44,520
Speaker 5: get to that and do the thing. I think that

577
00:29:45,840 --> 00:29:50,160
Speaker 5: it was for me learning and I'm still learning. I'm

578
00:29:50,200 --> 00:29:52,240
Speaker 5: still learning. There are things that I still need to do,

579
00:29:52,400 --> 00:29:54,800
Speaker 5: but I create the list for myself. Now, you know,

580
00:29:55,440 --> 00:29:59,040
Speaker 5: it's not about her having to amass the list of

581
00:29:59,120 --> 00:30:01,280
Speaker 5: things that need to be done around the house, Like

582
00:30:01,560 --> 00:30:04,640
Speaker 5: what about me? What do I see that needs to

583
00:30:04,640 --> 00:30:07,680
Speaker 5: be done? Right? That's the executive function part that I

584
00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:11,520
Speaker 5: talk about in the book that like it's a lot

585
00:30:11,520 --> 00:30:15,880
Speaker 5: of executive function goes like hidden and and like women

586
00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:19,040
Speaker 5: don't always talk about it because they just shoulder it,

587
00:30:19,360 --> 00:30:23,080
Speaker 5: right And and guys, if we even had half of

588
00:30:23,120 --> 00:30:26,440
Speaker 5: that load would probably buckle under the pressure. Right. So

589
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:29,560
Speaker 5: it's it's I think that's a big part of it.

590
00:30:29,680 --> 00:30:33,320
Speaker 5: As far as like needing that kind of like affirmation

591
00:30:33,400 --> 00:30:37,160
Speaker 5: and approval, that's a very American thing, Like we all

592
00:30:37,200 --> 00:30:38,800
Speaker 5: love a pat on the back. We love a like

593
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:41,680
Speaker 5: you're doing great? You know, Like I don't know about y'all,

594
00:30:41,720 --> 00:30:44,320
Speaker 5: but I like I go to like workout classes, and

595
00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:49,000
Speaker 5: if the instructor doesn't say that I'm doing great, then

596
00:30:49,080 --> 00:30:57,760
Speaker 5: like today am I dying? Like am I out of shape?

597
00:30:57,840 --> 00:31:01,600
Speaker 5: Like what's good? Like you know, like we need gold stars.

598
00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:04,120
Speaker 5: We're raised with gold stars. We need gold stars. But

599
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:07,480
Speaker 5: you could give yourself a gold star, like come on,

600
00:31:07,920 --> 00:31:10,880
Speaker 5: you could do it. There's also IG you could post.

601
00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:12,840
Speaker 5: You could be that guy, like you could post it

602
00:31:12,840 --> 00:31:14,640
Speaker 5: on IG, like look at the way I loaded the

603
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:18,200
Speaker 5: dishes today, and you could become famous that way. Unfortunately,

604
00:31:18,440 --> 00:31:21,960
Speaker 5: and then you you know what I'm saying then like whoever,

605
00:31:22,720 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 5: Paul Maliv will like back you and like sponsor you,

606
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:31,120
Speaker 5: you know for real. So I think that, you know,

607
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:33,200
Speaker 5: just trying to get that kind of validation is the

608
00:31:33,240 --> 00:31:35,560
Speaker 5: same validation that we wanted for our parents. It just

609
00:31:35,640 --> 00:31:38,680
Speaker 5: it just goes on and on. And like the people

610
00:31:38,720 --> 00:31:42,600
Speaker 5: that really I think get the most in life out

611
00:31:42,600 --> 00:31:45,640
Speaker 5: of life are people that are very good at like

612
00:31:45,720 --> 00:31:49,320
Speaker 5: validating themselves, right and just like very self possessed and

613
00:31:49,320 --> 00:31:55,080
Speaker 5: self contained. I think I just I strive for that daily.

614
00:31:55,560 --> 00:31:57,760
Speaker 5: But it's not it's not easy out here. You know,

615
00:31:57,880 --> 00:32:00,760
Speaker 5: it's not easy, but like it's it's it's it's something

616
00:32:00,880 --> 00:32:02,760
Speaker 5: that it's a discipline that I work on all the time.

617
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:12,120
Speaker 2: So it is helping, like a red flag word because

618
00:32:12,600 --> 00:32:15,560
Speaker 2: I noticed, like I remember being on the phone with

619
00:32:15,600 --> 00:32:17,000
Speaker 2: a guy and he was like, yeah, I can't go

620
00:32:17,000 --> 00:32:17,520
Speaker 2: out to night.

621
00:32:17,520 --> 00:32:19,400
Speaker 3: I got a babysit my kids.

622
00:32:20,520 --> 00:32:28,000
Speaker 5: Tim. I'm so I'm so worried about North Carolina.

623
00:32:29,080 --> 00:32:30,720
Speaker 3: That's your kids, don't I'm.

624
00:32:30,680 --> 00:32:33,240
Speaker 5: So worried about the dating pool in North Carolina. Help

625
00:32:33,880 --> 00:32:34,600
Speaker 5: first and foremost.

626
00:32:35,600 --> 00:32:38,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, helping me, you help? This is your house too.

627
00:32:38,720 --> 00:32:41,840
Speaker 5: Babysit babysitting his own children. I've heard that one before,

628
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:46,200
Speaker 5: and it's I've said it and and that was like

629
00:32:46,320 --> 00:32:49,040
Speaker 5: when I heard myself say it, that was terrifying to me,

630
00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:51,560
Speaker 5: you know what I'm saying, So like, yes, that is

631
00:32:51,600 --> 00:32:55,600
Speaker 5: a person that is not fully or they're showing that

632
00:32:55,640 --> 00:32:58,720
Speaker 5: maybe they're not the most fully vested in having the kids.

633
00:32:58,760 --> 00:33:01,040
Speaker 5: Maybe you know, like like you have to be like

634
00:33:01,120 --> 00:33:03,800
Speaker 5: the more you put into it, the more you invest

635
00:33:03,800 --> 00:33:08,560
Speaker 5: in them, the better and more chill your your life

636
00:33:08,560 --> 00:33:10,440
Speaker 5: will because if you're trying to if you ride, like

637
00:33:10,480 --> 00:33:12,240
Speaker 5: we say down South, you're trying to ride two horses

638
00:33:12,280 --> 00:33:14,560
Speaker 5: one ass. If you're trying to be like mister single

639
00:33:14,600 --> 00:33:17,680
Speaker 5: guy and have kids at the same time, No, because

640
00:33:17,680 --> 00:33:20,200
Speaker 5: people it'll be like dead giveaway. People will see right

641
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:23,560
Speaker 5: through it. You'll kind of try to present somebody that

642
00:33:23,600 --> 00:33:26,720
Speaker 5: you're not, and you have to accept where you are

643
00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:28,520
Speaker 5: in life. Like that was a big part of it

644
00:33:28,560 --> 00:33:31,840
Speaker 5: for me. I wasn't accepting that I was like a dad,

645
00:33:32,080 --> 00:33:34,640
Speaker 5: like all this stuff, you know, because like kids can

646
00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:37,600
Speaker 5: ruin everything. They can ruin it all. Like I was

647
00:33:37,600 --> 00:33:40,440
Speaker 5: looking for my chargers today from my computer. My kid

648
00:33:40,480 --> 00:33:43,080
Speaker 5: had used it with some g I Joe's and who's

649
00:33:43,080 --> 00:33:46,680
Speaker 5: putting together some kind of zip line thing about charger

650
00:33:48,280 --> 00:33:50,320
Speaker 5: And I told you not to touch it right now.

651
00:33:50,880 --> 00:33:52,600
Speaker 5: I gotta kill him, you know what I'm saying, Like

652
00:33:52,600 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 5: all these things so but but like but this is

653
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 5: what they do. They upset everything. But that's okay because

654
00:33:59,520 --> 00:34:02,760
Speaker 5: they bring you way. So the more you like accept

655
00:34:02,760 --> 00:34:07,400
Speaker 5: where you're at except what's going on, I think the better.

656
00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:10,480
Speaker 5: That's that's what made it better for me, accepting that

657
00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:13,640
Speaker 5: I would like, I'm a dad with kids and responsibilities

658
00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:15,560
Speaker 5: and I need to own up and act like it.

659
00:34:16,200 --> 00:34:17,520
Speaker 3: So I have a question to you, you feel like

660
00:34:17,600 --> 00:34:20,680
Speaker 3: this applies? So I have a friend. She doesn't work,

661
00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:24,000
Speaker 3: she doesn't have to work, and she has been.

662
00:34:23,880 --> 00:34:27,879
Speaker 2: Afforded a lot of the luxuries of life, but her

663
00:34:28,000 --> 00:34:33,480
Speaker 2: responsibility are the kids, the chores in the house, and

664
00:34:33,520 --> 00:34:35,520
Speaker 2: sometimes she gets fed up with having to do it

665
00:34:35,560 --> 00:34:39,160
Speaker 2: all by herself. And he's like, well, I bring home

666
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:40,920
Speaker 2: the bread, you bake it.

667
00:34:41,120 --> 00:34:44,520
Speaker 3: You know, that's your job. Do you feel like this

668
00:34:44,600 --> 00:34:47,040
Speaker 3: applies to someone who.

669
00:34:46,880 --> 00:34:50,000
Speaker 5: Had everybody applies to everybody?

670
00:34:52,000 --> 00:34:55,320
Speaker 2: You break all okay, you're bringing home all the bacon.

671
00:34:55,320 --> 00:34:57,399
Speaker 4: I would use your bacon and outsource some of these

672
00:34:57,440 --> 00:35:02,040
Speaker 4: tasks because regardless of what like a housewife they they say,

673
00:35:02,080 --> 00:35:05,120
Speaker 4: she works ninety hours a week, so that's two full.

674
00:35:05,040 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 2: Time jobs essentially.

675
00:35:06,040 --> 00:35:06,600
Speaker 5: Yeah.

676
00:35:06,719 --> 00:35:09,600
Speaker 2: Right, And I even my mom, I tell her use

677
00:35:09,640 --> 00:35:12,040
Speaker 2: his money, just get somebody to pay and come clean

678
00:35:12,080 --> 00:35:13,399
Speaker 2: the bathroom if you don't want to do it.

679
00:35:14,320 --> 00:35:16,239
Speaker 4: Like I feel like men valued their pockets.

680
00:35:16,480 --> 00:35:17,560
Speaker 2: So if he starts.

681
00:35:17,239 --> 00:35:19,520
Speaker 4: Seeing his bottom line like some of that money is

682
00:35:19,520 --> 00:35:24,359
Speaker 4: going to house cleaning and fucking a nanny, he might

683
00:35:24,719 --> 00:35:25,520
Speaker 4: want to help it.

684
00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:28,480
Speaker 5: Help out, you know, men, I mean listen, men don't

685
00:35:28,480 --> 00:35:30,480
Speaker 5: do anything as long as their money involved, right, Like

686
00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:33,000
Speaker 5: apparently men like I write in a book, like men

687
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:35,719
Speaker 5: can't cook, right, But like the best chefs in the

688
00:35:35,719 --> 00:35:39,920
Speaker 5: world are like our men. Right, Like you got like uh,

689
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:44,560
Speaker 5: Andrew Chang, You've got like you know, Anthony Bourdain got

690
00:35:44,600 --> 00:35:47,759
Speaker 5: Rest of Soul, like all these people, these Bobby Flay, right,

691
00:35:47,840 --> 00:35:52,319
Speaker 5: all these people, these men like broadcasts that they're great

692
00:35:52,320 --> 00:35:55,359
Speaker 5: at cooking, but then when they're home with their kids

693
00:35:55,400 --> 00:35:58,920
Speaker 5: are like, what's an egg? You know, like they don't

694
00:35:58,640 --> 00:36:03,000
Speaker 5: they know, right, what's the pay? I feel like I

695
00:36:03,040 --> 00:36:05,520
Speaker 5: feel it's like like this, even if your friend who

696
00:36:05,600 --> 00:36:07,719
Speaker 5: has that amazing that's a great problem to have. I

697
00:36:07,719 --> 00:36:10,760
Speaker 5: would love to switch aheads with her. That's an amazing life.

698
00:36:11,320 --> 00:36:13,279
Speaker 2: When you say that, that is a trigger for her

699
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:16,279
Speaker 2: for real, You're like, you don't understand.

700
00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:18,960
Speaker 3: You say you want to switch, but you wouldn't want

701
00:36:19,000 --> 00:36:23,760
Speaker 3: to switch a chance right now, I'll switch with you.

702
00:36:23,920 --> 00:36:26,760
Speaker 5: She probably has a big I'm guessing big big house,

703
00:36:27,480 --> 00:36:29,520
Speaker 5: a lot of things, a lot of material things like

704
00:36:30,160 --> 00:36:33,399
Speaker 5: those are responsibilities unto themselves. So when you think about it, yes,

705
00:36:33,600 --> 00:36:35,640
Speaker 5: that's a lot of executive function, right, So she has

706
00:36:35,680 --> 00:36:37,439
Speaker 5: to keep track of that. And even if she gets

707
00:36:37,920 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 5: like a house manager to quote unquote like you know,

708
00:36:41,360 --> 00:36:44,400
Speaker 5: defray the load right there, Like then she she's in

709
00:36:44,480 --> 00:36:47,360
Speaker 5: charge of that house manager, right, so she has to

710
00:36:47,360 --> 00:36:50,399
Speaker 5: tell them what to do. And my man, I'm sure

711
00:36:50,400 --> 00:36:52,880
Speaker 5: he has pressures. He's trying to make generational wealth and

712
00:36:52,920 --> 00:36:55,000
Speaker 5: all this kind of stuff. But when he gets home,

713
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:57,319
Speaker 5: he's done. He's got one shift, she's got two, right,

714
00:36:57,440 --> 00:37:00,200
Speaker 5: So that's it's a lot, it's a lot to do with.

715
00:37:00,320 --> 00:37:03,799
Speaker 5: I'm just saying this. I'm not saying that you have

716
00:37:03,880 --> 00:37:06,840
Speaker 5: to do fifty to fifty. I'm just saying do something

717
00:37:07,280 --> 00:37:10,560
Speaker 5: like this is like there has to be like the

718
00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:14,719
Speaker 5: middle point between nothing and something, right, Like you have

719
00:37:14,800 --> 00:37:18,160
Speaker 5: to do something. Do something if even if it's taking

720
00:37:18,200 --> 00:37:21,480
Speaker 5: out the trash, Like even if it's like like just

721
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:25,920
Speaker 5: remembering the nights that the trash was come, or remembering

722
00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:30,680
Speaker 5: your children's schedule, even if it's just remembering your kids teachers' names, right,

723
00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:34,560
Speaker 5: or their shoe sizes, that takes nothing. That is nothing.

724
00:37:34,560 --> 00:37:37,279
Speaker 5: That's just to walk to their room check okay, uk,

725
00:37:37,440 --> 00:37:39,719
Speaker 5: it's always a little bigger with the shoe size and

726
00:37:39,760 --> 00:37:43,440
Speaker 5: American size, right, So that's all it takes. But like

727
00:37:43,560 --> 00:37:47,200
Speaker 5: even that is, I feel like people are dragging, Like

728
00:37:47,200 --> 00:37:49,800
Speaker 5: like I've had so many comments where people are like, man,

729
00:37:49,960 --> 00:37:52,400
Speaker 5: this guy sounds like a woozy heel woman. You know,

730
00:37:52,520 --> 00:37:54,799
Speaker 5: Like like I'm like, dude, I'm not asking you to

731
00:37:54,840 --> 00:37:58,520
Speaker 5: do anything, but maybe like five minutes work right, five

732
00:37:58,520 --> 00:38:01,120
Speaker 5: minutes work here and there and that I think.

733
00:38:01,080 --> 00:38:02,480
Speaker 3: It would make a dramatic difference.

734
00:38:03,880 --> 00:38:05,960
Speaker 5: It'll make a dramatic difference. But a lot of men

735
00:38:06,120 --> 00:38:08,840
Speaker 5: don't take in a lot of information like this, or

736
00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:13,160
Speaker 5: just people in general don't take in new ideas because

737
00:38:13,280 --> 00:38:16,680
Speaker 5: they think it's like a threat to the established order

738
00:38:16,680 --> 00:38:19,759
Speaker 5: of things, you know what I'm saying. So I'd say

739
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:25,239
Speaker 5: to your friend just like I hear her. But what

740
00:38:25,400 --> 00:38:28,640
Speaker 5: I suggest to women at that point is like take

741
00:38:28,680 --> 00:38:30,880
Speaker 5: time for yourself. If your man's not going to do anything,

742
00:38:31,640 --> 00:38:33,839
Speaker 5: say you're going out with your girls on Thursday, Friday

743
00:38:33,880 --> 00:38:35,840
Speaker 5: or whatever it is, maybe Thursday, which is little Friday.

744
00:38:35,920 --> 00:38:38,920
Speaker 5: I like little Friday. So go out have some fun.

745
00:38:39,560 --> 00:38:42,160
Speaker 5: Let him do. He'll survive, you know what I mean,

746
00:38:42,239 --> 00:38:46,040
Speaker 5: Like he'll be Okay, have some fun for yourself, make

747
00:38:46,120 --> 00:38:48,759
Speaker 5: some time for yourself. I had to do that for

748
00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:52,000
Speaker 5: myself too, like because I felt that there were so

749
00:38:52,040 --> 00:38:55,400
Speaker 5: many like resentments built up and whatever I was doing.

750
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:57,719
Speaker 5: So if I was asked to do something, I'd be like, yeah,

751
00:38:57,719 --> 00:38:59,400
Speaker 5: i'll do it. I'll do with an attitude, but I'm

752
00:38:59,440 --> 00:39:08,400
Speaker 5: still doing it. What's the fucking problem? Right, I'll be that.

753
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:10,600
Speaker 2: But just this friend is the test.

754
00:39:10,760 --> 00:39:13,879
Speaker 4: Friend would be like the exception. Right, most women are

755
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:17,440
Speaker 4: working along with their partners. Yes, and also if they

756
00:39:17,480 --> 00:39:19,560
Speaker 4: have kids, they are responsible for the children and they're

757
00:39:19,600 --> 00:39:22,560
Speaker 4: responsible for the household. So it's like the bills all

758
00:39:22,640 --> 00:39:26,640
Speaker 4: at everything, nothing's fifty to fifty. You see what I'm saying.

759
00:39:26,680 --> 00:39:28,360
Speaker 4: So men they online talking about.

760
00:39:28,200 --> 00:39:30,960
Speaker 2: Fifty to fifty, fifty fifty that mostly y'all don't have

761
00:39:31,080 --> 00:39:34,279
Speaker 2: y'all have anyway, Okay, we'd be very clear.

762
00:39:34,360 --> 00:39:39,440
Speaker 5: They don't to any man out there listening, right, and

763
00:39:39,480 --> 00:39:41,759
Speaker 5: to any man out there listening, like just remember, there's

764
00:39:41,760 --> 00:39:44,120
Speaker 5: always guys doing worse than you. There's always guys doing

765
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:47,160
Speaker 5: worse than you. And like like I was at my

766
00:39:47,200 --> 00:39:49,200
Speaker 5: kid's school and I asked.

767
00:39:48,960 --> 00:39:52,799
Speaker 2: The excuse, no, no, no, no, no, worst to me shit

768
00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:53,480
Speaker 2: I'm doing.

769
00:39:53,920 --> 00:39:58,000
Speaker 5: I think it's the reason to do right there, you

770
00:39:58,080 --> 00:39:59,520
Speaker 5: have to pat then on the back or they won't

771
00:39:59,520 --> 00:40:01,160
Speaker 5: do it. I'm telling you have to give them a

772
00:40:01,160 --> 00:40:03,279
Speaker 5: little patter in the back, a little even for this. Yeah,

773
00:40:03,320 --> 00:40:06,759
Speaker 5: google an a boy, right, So like this dad, That's

774
00:40:06,760 --> 00:40:08,719
Speaker 5: how I knew I wasn't so bad because the guy

775
00:40:08,800 --> 00:40:10,160
Speaker 5: was like I was, like, I was bad, but not

776
00:40:10,200 --> 00:40:12,439
Speaker 5: that bad. Like I was like, I asked him about

777
00:40:12,440 --> 00:40:14,640
Speaker 5: his other kid that didn't go to this like to

778
00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:17,839
Speaker 5: our kids school, and he's like, oh, yeah, he goes

779
00:40:17,880 --> 00:40:20,840
Speaker 5: to He couldn't remember the name of his child's school.

780
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:23,400
Speaker 5: Let's just put it that way. Okay, how can you

781
00:40:23,440 --> 00:40:25,719
Speaker 5: not know the name of what if something goes sideways

782
00:40:25,719 --> 00:40:27,600
Speaker 5: in school? You don't on the.

783
00:40:27,560 --> 00:40:29,840
Speaker 2: News and it's in school shooting, you don't even realize

784
00:40:29,840 --> 00:40:31,240
Speaker 2: it's your fucking kids school.

785
00:40:31,640 --> 00:40:34,200
Speaker 3: Right, Chill, that's crazy.

786
00:40:36,640 --> 00:40:38,839
Speaker 5: I mean, I'm just here to tell you, you know,

787
00:40:39,400 --> 00:40:42,120
Speaker 5: right right, It's like it's like that that kind of

788
00:40:42,160 --> 00:40:44,840
Speaker 5: like out to lunch mentality has to stop.

789
00:40:45,280 --> 00:40:48,120
Speaker 4: Yeah, because men think it's like, you know, we talk

790
00:40:48,160 --> 00:40:49,640
Speaker 4: about this on the show a lot, like men saying

791
00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:52,480
Speaker 4: that they're simple. That's not a compliment to yourself, right,

792
00:40:52,520 --> 00:40:54,560
Speaker 4: you know, and they say women are more complex because

793
00:40:54,560 --> 00:40:57,959
Speaker 4: we do think things on a different layered right, But

794
00:40:58,000 --> 00:41:00,360
Speaker 4: why do you want to be simple? That's a simple

795
00:41:00,480 --> 00:41:01,640
Speaker 4: ton as far as I'm going.

796
00:41:02,800 --> 00:41:05,640
Speaker 5: Because it's easier to be simple. It's easier to be simple, right,

797
00:41:06,040 --> 00:41:08,399
Speaker 5: or so we think. But actually, in the long run

798
00:41:08,440 --> 00:41:11,560
Speaker 5: it will cost you so like, for instance, just knowing

799
00:41:11,600 --> 00:41:16,120
Speaker 5: and understanding like what you know, if it's like your

800
00:41:16,160 --> 00:41:19,480
Speaker 5: kid's schedule, your wife's schedule, whatever it is, and understanding

801
00:41:19,640 --> 00:41:26,000
Speaker 5: the household task and the schedule itself will will make

802
00:41:26,080 --> 00:41:28,799
Speaker 5: your life so much easier because you'll know what the

803
00:41:28,840 --> 00:41:30,880
Speaker 5: game plan is and you won't have to ask a

804
00:41:30,920 --> 00:41:35,440
Speaker 5: million questions, you'll already know. I think that that's just

805
00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:38,040
Speaker 5: really important. In fact, my wife is always sending me

806
00:41:38,120 --> 00:41:43,279
Speaker 5: articles about like about no good Man and stuff, but like,

807
00:41:43,440 --> 00:41:46,880
Speaker 5: but this is, but this one I found really interesting

808
00:41:46,880 --> 00:41:49,960
Speaker 5: that she sent me. She's great, she's like a PhD.

809
00:41:50,160 --> 00:41:53,279
Speaker 5: So she's a very smart lady. All right, five psychology.

810
00:41:53,280 --> 00:41:56,400
Speaker 5: Five early signs your marriage is heading for divorce. And

811
00:41:56,480 --> 00:42:01,759
Speaker 5: number five was like, she just said, she said this

812
00:42:01,760 --> 00:42:04,719
Speaker 5: to me yesterday. But she's like, she's kind of like

813
00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:07,919
Speaker 5: she likes that the book can like, she likes the books.

814
00:42:07,960 --> 00:42:10,239
Speaker 5: She likes the response, and she likes what I'm doing.

815
00:42:10,280 --> 00:42:12,279
Speaker 5: So she's trying to support me in that. You try

816
00:42:12,320 --> 00:42:14,200
Speaker 5: to say, I see what she said. It's say into

817
00:42:14,200 --> 00:42:16,560
Speaker 5: the rocks, you see how quick? I'm like, why don't

818
00:42:16,560 --> 00:42:19,040
Speaker 5: you just tell you something? Okay, it's just things she's

819
00:42:19,080 --> 00:42:21,239
Speaker 5: trying to support me, all right, all right? This is

820
00:42:21,600 --> 00:42:24,319
Speaker 5: poor division of labor number five. And it was just

821
00:42:24,320 --> 00:42:27,520
Speaker 5: said like like one out of four marriages end in

822
00:42:27,600 --> 00:42:30,560
Speaker 5: divorce because of a poor division of labor. One out

823
00:42:30,600 --> 00:42:34,120
Speaker 5: of four. That's a lot. That's a lot, okay. And

824
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:38,200
Speaker 5: it's just it's so simple to solve, you know. And yeah,

825
00:42:38,400 --> 00:42:44,080
Speaker 5: I mean, I just don't think that men need that

826
00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:46,160
Speaker 5: pat in the back for doing dishes and things like that.

827
00:42:46,360 --> 00:42:49,319
Speaker 5: I think you should eventually get a pat on the

828
00:42:49,360 --> 00:42:52,719
Speaker 5: back for changing your ways. But I don't think like

829
00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:55,759
Speaker 5: every little thing you do, like you're six years old,

830
00:42:56,080 --> 00:42:59,120
Speaker 5: you need gold stars for right, Yeah, it'll come later.

831
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:02,400
Speaker 4: Crazy, But I have a man now who will We

832
00:43:02,480 --> 00:43:04,319
Speaker 4: don't live together though, right so I don't know how

833
00:43:04,360 --> 00:43:07,279
Speaker 4: it would be cohabitating, But when he's here, like he

834
00:43:07,280 --> 00:43:10,560
Speaker 4: helps he if I'm cooking, he's washing dishes, like so great.

835
00:43:10,719 --> 00:43:13,360
Speaker 4: I wrote it down though, what I wanted in my

836
00:43:13,400 --> 00:43:16,000
Speaker 4: little manifestation for the next man. All right, so there's

837
00:43:16,040 --> 00:43:18,480
Speaker 4: a lot of shit that he does that's on my list,

838
00:43:18,880 --> 00:43:19,040
Speaker 4: you know.

839
00:43:19,320 --> 00:43:22,000
Speaker 2: You know I wrote you don't know what you.

840
00:43:22,000 --> 00:43:24,400
Speaker 4: Need until you experienced the thing, and you're not getting it.

841
00:43:25,080 --> 00:43:28,040
Speaker 4: When I was in this two bedroom apartment with this man,

842
00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:30,960
Speaker 4: and I'm like, what if we bought a house, Like

843
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:33,719
Speaker 4: I'm gonna be responsible for even bigger space because he's

844
00:43:33,760 --> 00:43:36,520
Speaker 4: not doing shit like you're doing a bare minimum in here,

845
00:43:36,680 --> 00:43:40,319
Speaker 4: you know what I'm saying. He'll wash dishes, but like

846
00:43:41,120 --> 00:43:43,239
Speaker 4: even just calling maintenance and stuff like that, like I

847
00:43:43,280 --> 00:43:45,680
Speaker 4: had to helping you fix your fucking car.

848
00:43:46,600 --> 00:43:51,840
Speaker 2: Well, yes, because I'm I am super dupid, like mechanically medical.

849
00:43:51,920 --> 00:43:53,479
Speaker 5: Okay, so I.

850
00:43:53,400 --> 00:43:56,279
Speaker 2: Want somebody who also matches that, right, Right, we don't

851
00:43:56,280 --> 00:43:57,799
Speaker 2: always have to pay somebody to do some shit if

852
00:43:57,800 --> 00:43:59,959
Speaker 2: we can look at YouTube and figure it out. Right,

853
00:44:00,800 --> 00:44:02,879
Speaker 2: he just wasn't using his screen, you know what I'm

854
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:05,120
Speaker 2: saying is and then he would have his friends calling

855
00:44:05,160 --> 00:44:07,200
Speaker 2: me to help them solve their problems. I'm like, no,

856
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:10,399
Speaker 2: you outsourcing your girl that you already annoying the shit

857
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:15,480
Speaker 2: out of to help somebody else man figure some shit out,

858
00:44:15,520 --> 00:44:17,680
Speaker 2: Like what is that like, I don't want to be

859
00:44:18,320 --> 00:44:21,839
Speaker 2: the problem solver in my relationship. And if men want to,

860
00:44:22,360 --> 00:44:24,600
Speaker 2: you have you have to you have to show up

861
00:44:24,600 --> 00:44:25,400
Speaker 2: in that leadership.

862
00:44:25,680 --> 00:44:27,480
Speaker 5: AJ and Tam let me just say thank you for

863
00:44:27,520 --> 00:44:31,000
Speaker 5: your service. Both of y'all have described some men that

864
00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:39,320
Speaker 5: are just out my God for the next one. Oh no, he's.

865
00:44:39,120 --> 00:44:41,400
Speaker 2: Gonna be for me. I don't mind giving somebody a

866
00:44:41,400 --> 00:44:44,319
Speaker 2: furbish man like girl. He is he works. Oh no,

867
00:44:44,719 --> 00:44:46,520
Speaker 2: here going to remember what I really feel like.

868
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:49,680
Speaker 4: Men only learn through consequence, right, Yes, So it's going

869
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:52,200
Speaker 4: to be like he's gonna tally these things up. He's

870
00:44:52,200 --> 00:44:54,840
Speaker 4: going to do his own inventory and realize what didn't

871
00:44:54,880 --> 00:44:57,040
Speaker 4: work here. Yeah, and he'll probably do better in the

872
00:44:57,120 --> 00:44:57,880
Speaker 4: next relationship.

873
00:44:58,239 --> 00:45:01,680
Speaker 2: Maybe we're not the one who don't have no boundaries.

874
00:45:01,920 --> 00:45:05,879
Speaker 5: Yeah, exactly. Maybe maybe not that please please.

875
00:45:06,360 --> 00:45:10,360
Speaker 2: The craziest argument, no argument you got in over chores.

876
00:45:10,400 --> 00:45:12,160
Speaker 2: The craziest one over like a chore.

877
00:45:12,920 --> 00:45:17,680
Speaker 5: Oh okay. The craziest argument I think we got in

878
00:45:18,680 --> 00:45:22,240
Speaker 5: over chores was probably just it has to do with laundry,

879
00:45:22,880 --> 00:45:26,160
Speaker 5: Like because I had a pile of clothes and I

880
00:45:26,280 --> 00:45:28,200
Speaker 5: liked my pile. I had, like my mountain. You know

881
00:45:28,200 --> 00:45:34,439
Speaker 5: what I mean asked me if it was dirty. No,

882
00:45:34,960 --> 00:45:41,279
Speaker 5: it wasn't dirty. It was like maybe ish ish I had.

883
00:45:41,440 --> 00:45:43,640
Speaker 5: I had like actually I had like multiple piles, right,

884
00:45:43,680 --> 00:45:46,799
Speaker 5: so you had like you had the clean pile and

885
00:45:46,840 --> 00:45:48,840
Speaker 5: you had the like ish pile, and you had the

886
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:52,520
Speaker 5: filthy pile. Right. So it was like it was like, oh,

887
00:45:52,560 --> 00:46:01,840
Speaker 5: that was the scratch and sniff. I have my own yeah, yeah,

888
00:46:01,880 --> 00:46:04,440
Speaker 5: but I have my own order, you know. Like I

889
00:46:04,520 --> 00:46:06,879
Speaker 5: was like everything ends up on the ground eventually, right,

890
00:46:06,960 --> 00:46:10,920
Speaker 5: Like physics tells us that everything falls apart, Everything ends

891
00:46:10,960 --> 00:46:14,040
Speaker 5: up in the ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Why

892
00:46:14,080 --> 00:46:16,239
Speaker 5: are we out here, Like I'm trying to like hit

893
00:46:16,239 --> 00:46:20,640
Speaker 5: her with philosophy and reverse psychology and jokes.

894
00:46:22,600 --> 00:46:25,560
Speaker 2: She started doing exactly that. What if she just stopped

895
00:46:26,280 --> 00:46:27,960
Speaker 2: What if she had stopped.

896
00:46:28,640 --> 00:46:35,720
Speaker 4: Washing clothes just as nasty and her like nasty nasty.

897
00:46:35,480 --> 00:46:39,759
Speaker 2: That's clean dishes that it might be clean dishes and

898
00:46:39,840 --> 00:46:41,279
Speaker 2: those dishes dirty over there.

899
00:46:41,400 --> 00:46:43,360
Speaker 5: You'd be crashing out. The kids would be like, we

900
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:45,880
Speaker 5: need to take mommy in for reservicing something like that.

901
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:50,440
Speaker 5: Something we ain't gonna make it. We ain't gonna make it,

902
00:46:50,480 --> 00:46:56,360
Speaker 5: called grandma, Like if you're absolutely positively right, she's the

903
00:46:56,400 --> 00:46:59,120
Speaker 5: neatest person I know. So like back in the day

904
00:46:59,120 --> 00:47:01,560
Speaker 5: in college, like roommates, what they would do is lay

905
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:05,080
Speaker 5: a sock on her bed and watch her crash out.

906
00:47:05,640 --> 00:47:08,960
Speaker 5: Just watch your crash out, and so like that that

907
00:47:09,080 --> 00:47:11,080
Speaker 5: kind of like that was a joke to me, right,

908
00:47:11,120 --> 00:47:13,080
Speaker 5: that was like a joke. I was like, haha, kidding,

909
00:47:13,400 --> 00:47:15,359
Speaker 5: Like I'll do the same thing, like leave a dish

910
00:47:15,400 --> 00:47:18,080
Speaker 5: out and be like how long I'm just timing you,

911
00:47:18,080 --> 00:47:19,480
Speaker 5: you know, to see how long it takes me to

912
00:47:19,520 --> 00:47:22,440
Speaker 5: get it. And like after a while you realized, Okay,

913
00:47:22,600 --> 00:47:25,359
Speaker 5: that's read the customer. It's not funny. It comes from

914
00:47:25,440 --> 00:47:29,160
Speaker 5: real place. Like her her upbringing was such where it's

915
00:47:29,200 --> 00:47:33,799
Speaker 5: like a lot of different people lived in her house, right,

916
00:47:33,880 --> 00:47:36,600
Speaker 5: so it's like they rented out rooms to people. So

917
00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:38,960
Speaker 5: her space because she's one of four children growing up

918
00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:41,319
Speaker 5: in New York City, right, so it's a it's a

919
00:47:41,400 --> 00:47:45,759
Speaker 5: jam packed situation. So she kept her space orderly and

920
00:47:45,840 --> 00:47:48,000
Speaker 5: that's how she That was Like that was for her

921
00:47:48,040 --> 00:47:53,120
Speaker 5: mental health and so like really putting that together, right,

922
00:47:53,320 --> 00:47:57,080
Speaker 5: and so putting that together and understanding that, Okay, well

923
00:47:57,120 --> 00:48:00,560
Speaker 5: this this is how she copes. Is like like that

924
00:48:00,760 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 5: was how you know, that was my moment of maturity, right,

925
00:48:05,360 --> 00:48:09,040
Speaker 5: so gold start for me. But like you know, but

926
00:48:09,719 --> 00:48:13,160
Speaker 5: you have to make sure that you understand where your

927
00:48:13,160 --> 00:48:16,919
Speaker 5: partner's coming from. Right. So not only was I needed

928
00:48:16,960 --> 00:48:19,960
Speaker 5: to understand that part right, that's a bucket, then I

929
00:48:20,040 --> 00:48:22,200
Speaker 5: had to be like Jordan, you need to grow up

930
00:48:22,520 --> 00:48:25,520
Speaker 5: and just clean up after yourself. Because like what I

931
00:48:25,640 --> 00:48:28,520
Speaker 5: got the reinforcement I got about cleaning, and our house

932
00:48:28,600 --> 00:48:32,120
Speaker 5: was clean. It was clean because my mom was scary.

933
00:48:32,360 --> 00:48:34,960
Speaker 5: You know, she's a scary lady that would be like,

934
00:48:36,000 --> 00:48:40,520
Speaker 5: I'm gonna come through for inspection on Saturday morning, you know,

935
00:48:40,920 --> 00:48:42,919
Speaker 5: and make sure that that bed is like you could

936
00:48:42,960 --> 00:48:45,960
Speaker 5: bounce a quarter off it. Are you gonna die? You

937
00:48:45,960 --> 00:48:47,840
Speaker 5: know what I mean? Like it was like I was

938
00:48:47,920 --> 00:48:50,440
Speaker 5: under a lot of pressure. I was pressed, you know,

939
00:48:50,640 --> 00:48:53,120
Speaker 5: it was it was crazy. Was I come from the

940
00:48:53,160 --> 00:48:56,560
Speaker 5: era of having to get to church clothes together on

941
00:48:56,680 --> 00:49:02,600
Speaker 5: Saturday night and to polish my little penny loafers to

942
00:49:02,640 --> 00:49:06,399
Speaker 5: a high shine like on Saturday night and then make

943
00:49:06,440 --> 00:49:10,080
Speaker 5: sure that I studied my sunny school lesson before and

944
00:49:10,200 --> 00:49:12,640
Speaker 5: start my college. Do you think when I left that

945
00:49:12,760 --> 00:49:16,040
Speaker 5: house that I wanted to do that anymore? Absolutely? Not.

946
00:49:16,080 --> 00:49:18,600
Speaker 5: I was like, every day is a fun day, like

947
00:49:18,680 --> 00:49:21,360
Speaker 5: eating fruit, loose, like just having a good time.

948
00:49:21,800 --> 00:49:30,280
Speaker 2: Like I got another story, I got another bad story, nigga.

949
00:49:30,480 --> 00:49:32,279
Speaker 5: Oh no, damn no.

950
00:49:33,000 --> 00:49:34,439
Speaker 3: I would come home from work.

951
00:49:34,520 --> 00:49:36,800
Speaker 2: So I was working two jobs at the time, Okay,

952
00:49:36,880 --> 00:49:39,760
Speaker 2: oh wow, I was doing hair and working at Tafura,

953
00:49:40,880 --> 00:49:42,759
Speaker 2: and I would come home from work and I would

954
00:49:42,800 --> 00:49:46,319
Speaker 2: find tape, little pieces of I know, you know this story, ag,

955
00:49:46,920 --> 00:49:49,279
Speaker 2: I find little pieces of tape in the hallway, in

956
00:49:49,360 --> 00:49:52,600
Speaker 2: the stairwell, in the kitchen, just little piece of two

957
00:49:52,640 --> 00:49:55,080
Speaker 2: little pieces of tape every day and be little pieces

958
00:49:55,120 --> 00:49:55,520
Speaker 2: of tape.

959
00:49:55,520 --> 00:49:56,120
Speaker 3: What the fuck?

960
00:49:56,520 --> 00:49:59,760
Speaker 2: Why am I finding black tape like the electrical tape,

961
00:50:00,160 --> 00:50:00,560
Speaker 2: not like.

962
00:50:00,560 --> 00:50:01,239
Speaker 5: The clear tape.

963
00:50:02,280 --> 00:50:06,560
Speaker 2: So after the months, this goes on from months, right,

964
00:50:07,080 --> 00:50:08,920
Speaker 2: So I come home and I find two little pieces

965
00:50:09,000 --> 00:50:12,600
Speaker 2: of tape stuck to the dishwashing right. So finally, like,

966
00:50:12,680 --> 00:50:15,040
Speaker 2: what the fuck is this tape? Every time I come

967
00:50:15,080 --> 00:50:19,600
Speaker 2: home there's pieces of tape. Do y'all know that this

968
00:50:19,719 --> 00:50:22,680
Speaker 2: nigga was taping both sides of his camera on his

969
00:50:22,840 --> 00:50:25,400
Speaker 2: laptop and like watching porn and beating.

970
00:50:25,120 --> 00:50:26,320
Speaker 3: Off somewhere in the house.

971
00:50:26,440 --> 00:50:27,839
Speaker 5: Oh my god, you've done.

972
00:50:27,880 --> 00:50:29,720
Speaker 2: You just take the tape off and leave it wherever

973
00:50:29,760 --> 00:50:33,600
Speaker 2: it was at wherever he beat off, eating his dick

974
00:50:33,640 --> 00:50:36,719
Speaker 2: and mark kitchen. Why are you in the kitchen, your

975
00:50:36,840 --> 00:50:39,680
Speaker 2: nasty nigga? Like what in the world.

976
00:50:40,600 --> 00:50:43,400
Speaker 5: At least he wasn't using gorilla glu glue or whatever

977
00:50:43,600 --> 00:50:44,239
Speaker 5: you know like.

978
00:50:45,400 --> 00:50:48,239
Speaker 2: That, he said, Like the cameras he thought somebody could

979
00:50:48,360 --> 00:50:51,400
Speaker 2: like watch him, watch him. None, and they do. They do,

980
00:50:51,640 --> 00:50:54,759
Speaker 2: like log into your ship. But guy, he was beating

981
00:50:54,760 --> 00:50:55,439
Speaker 2: this nig a lot.

982
00:50:55,840 --> 00:50:57,480
Speaker 3: So I've heard while I'm at work.

983
00:50:59,280 --> 00:51:03,400
Speaker 5: Okay, again, this is really like, I'm not a therapist.

984
00:51:04,520 --> 00:51:07,520
Speaker 5: The secretive nature in which this man is going about

985
00:51:07,520 --> 00:51:10,200
Speaker 5: this is that's very suspect, and I'm glad that you hitit.

986
00:51:10,239 --> 00:51:16,919
Speaker 5: That relationship, yo, that is wild, that is wild, I think, yeah.

987
00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:20,879
Speaker 5: I mean that's that makes you wonder like when when

988
00:51:20,920 --> 00:51:23,719
Speaker 5: the woman's outside the house, what are you doing with

989
00:51:23,760 --> 00:51:26,879
Speaker 5: your time? Right? And that that's that gets me back

990
00:51:26,880 --> 00:51:31,040
Speaker 5: to integrity, right, So it's like you could be beaten off, Okay,

991
00:51:32,280 --> 00:51:33,719
Speaker 5: is that what you're gonna do with your time out?

992
00:51:33,760 --> 00:51:35,080
Speaker 4: How to make more money so I don't have to

993
00:51:35,080 --> 00:51:39,320
Speaker 4: work two jobs.

994
00:51:36,239 --> 00:51:40,759
Speaker 5: That exactly exactly part So rather, I think I think

995
00:51:40,840 --> 00:51:43,359
Speaker 5: a lot of men use you know, so I've heard,

996
00:51:44,360 --> 00:51:47,839
Speaker 5: uh you use masturbation as like if they're bored, if

997
00:51:47,840 --> 00:51:50,120
Speaker 5: they need to cope, if they need to calm down.

998
00:51:50,280 --> 00:51:53,120
Speaker 5: I'm not I'm not excusing anything that your dude did,

999
00:51:53,520 --> 00:51:55,440
Speaker 5: but like there's much better things to do when your

1000
00:51:55,480 --> 00:51:59,120
Speaker 5: wife leaves the house, Like look around, what what needs doing?

1001
00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:01,880
Speaker 5: Just like do it real fast, do it or you

1002
00:52:01,960 --> 00:52:03,719
Speaker 5: won't do it at all, Like do it faster, you

1003
00:52:03,719 --> 00:52:05,759
Speaker 5: won't do it all. That's my that's my mo.

1004
00:52:07,160 --> 00:52:07,399
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1005
00:52:07,440 --> 00:52:09,680
Speaker 3: My ex used to be like, it'll be clean up

1006
00:52:09,680 --> 00:52:10,399
Speaker 3: when you wake up.

1007
00:52:10,480 --> 00:52:12,799
Speaker 4: One time he said it'll be I'm like, he came

1008
00:52:12,840 --> 00:52:14,480
Speaker 4: home late in the evening and he just dropped the

1009
00:52:14,480 --> 00:52:17,319
Speaker 4: piece of whatever, every piece of the house, so from

1010
00:52:17,320 --> 00:52:19,120
Speaker 4: the door to the living room, it's like an item

1011
00:52:19,160 --> 00:52:21,360
Speaker 4: a book bag like a kid.

1012
00:52:21,280 --> 00:52:23,759
Speaker 2: You know. So I'm like, could you pick this? You

1013
00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:26,120
Speaker 2: come into a clean house and you're just now it's

1014
00:52:26,320 --> 00:52:29,040
Speaker 2: just in disarray, right, And he was like, well, it'll

1015
00:52:29,080 --> 00:52:31,280
Speaker 2: be picked up by the time you wake up. I'm like, nigga,

1016
00:52:31,440 --> 00:52:34,960
Speaker 2: I'm still awake stepping over shit. Well, when I realized

1017
00:52:35,120 --> 00:52:38,239
Speaker 2: that this nigga is matter off, he actually had adhd

1018
00:52:38,520 --> 00:52:40,600
Speaker 2: oh and what he was doing because he'd wake up

1019
00:52:40,640 --> 00:52:43,120
Speaker 2: like four o'clock in the morning, right, He literally was

1020
00:52:43,200 --> 00:52:46,600
Speaker 2: creating things to do when he wakes up because he

1021
00:52:46,600 --> 00:52:48,200
Speaker 2: would wake up and clean up his stuff.

1022
00:52:48,239 --> 00:52:49,959
Speaker 4: He'd wake up and wash the dishes.

1023
00:52:49,680 --> 00:52:49,920
Speaker 2: You know.

1024
00:52:50,239 --> 00:52:52,400
Speaker 4: So he was I'm like, if you don't do that,

1025
00:52:52,520 --> 00:52:54,600
Speaker 4: then you don't have to do this four o'clock in

1026
00:52:54,600 --> 00:52:58,520
Speaker 4: the morning. Right, But he literally creating things to do.

1027
00:52:58,920 --> 00:53:01,960
Speaker 5: Yes, yes, just not doing it. I mean.

1028
00:53:05,680 --> 00:53:09,640
Speaker 2: I don't understand, man, you have to when it.

1029
00:53:09,840 --> 00:53:12,080
Speaker 5: I mean, like the winning strategy for me has just

1030
00:53:12,120 --> 00:53:15,319
Speaker 5: like been put my arms around whatever my wife wants

1031
00:53:15,400 --> 00:53:17,480
Speaker 5: instead of like my head around it. Because men will

1032
00:53:17,600 --> 00:53:19,960
Speaker 5: come up with a million ECUs is why they shouldn't

1033
00:53:20,000 --> 00:53:23,359
Speaker 5: do it right now. And this this guy that is

1034
00:53:23,360 --> 00:53:26,719
Speaker 5: in my life, that is you know, that shows me

1035
00:53:27,040 --> 00:53:28,880
Speaker 5: this role model. I don't want to name his name,

1036
00:53:28,920 --> 00:53:31,879
Speaker 5: but he's a role model and he just shows me

1037
00:53:32,040 --> 00:53:34,920
Speaker 5: like every day in every way, like oh okay, just

1038
00:53:34,960 --> 00:53:37,200
Speaker 5: do the opposite of that. But not everybody's lucky enough

1039
00:53:37,239 --> 00:53:39,080
Speaker 5: to have that in their life, you know what I'm saying, Like,

1040
00:53:39,520 --> 00:53:43,840
Speaker 5: not everybody is like enough to that like that foil

1041
00:53:43,880 --> 00:53:46,040
Speaker 5: the community, foil like, don't do it like don't be

1042
00:53:46,160 --> 00:53:48,799
Speaker 5: like him, don't be like Jim like that that is.

1043
00:53:49,840 --> 00:53:52,240
Speaker 5: That's been very helpful to me, honestly, and that helped

1044
00:53:52,239 --> 00:53:53,440
Speaker 5: me like write this book.

1045
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:57,279
Speaker 4: I mean feminine energy to write that book.

1046
00:53:57,440 --> 00:54:00,120
Speaker 5: Not even people keep talking about like being feminine. I'm like,

1047
00:54:00,280 --> 00:54:03,920
Speaker 5: is not being feminine to like Okay, for instance, I

1048
00:54:04,000 --> 00:54:07,680
Speaker 5: needed to I needed this. People will call it feminine,

1049
00:54:07,680 --> 00:54:10,359
Speaker 5: but actually I didn't even put this in the book.

1050
00:54:10,400 --> 00:54:12,920
Speaker 5: But this is what happened to me. We're on vacation

1051
00:54:13,680 --> 00:54:16,919
Speaker 5: and we like a door down for us. We rent

1052
00:54:16,960 --> 00:54:19,839
Speaker 5: this place on an island in Maine, and a door

1053
00:54:19,920 --> 00:54:23,200
Speaker 5: down from us is this guy who's a colonel and

1054
00:54:23,360 --> 00:54:26,759
Speaker 5: an Army colonel. Very nice guy. Let's the kids use

1055
00:54:26,840 --> 00:54:31,200
Speaker 5: all his like little floaties and all that kind of stuff, right,

1056
00:54:31,440 --> 00:54:35,360
Speaker 5: He's got them like stockpiled and we just get to

1057
00:54:35,360 --> 00:54:38,520
Speaker 5: talking on the beach and he's just a really nice person.

1058
00:54:38,560 --> 00:54:40,520
Speaker 5: And I was like, so, what did you do in

1059
00:54:40,560 --> 00:54:42,279
Speaker 5: your time in the army as a colonel? And he

1060
00:54:42,400 --> 00:54:44,879
Speaker 5: was like, I was a quartermaster. And if you don't

1061
00:54:44,880 --> 00:54:47,319
Speaker 5: know what a quartermaster is, a quartermaster like make sure

1062
00:54:47,320 --> 00:54:50,720
Speaker 5: that all the provisions that the army needs are there

1063
00:54:50,880 --> 00:54:53,600
Speaker 5: when they need them. Right. So if it's ammunition, if

1064
00:54:53,640 --> 00:54:56,440
Speaker 5: it's food, if it's clothing, they got you. And they

1065
00:54:56,480 --> 00:55:02,000
Speaker 5: know where everything is in the in like in the stockade, whatever,

1066
00:55:02,160 --> 00:55:05,120
Speaker 5: you know, Like they know where everything is. So I

1067
00:55:05,160 --> 00:55:08,400
Speaker 5: was like, okay, So this guy like knows where everything

1068
00:55:08,440 --> 00:55:11,560
Speaker 5: is in his house. He knows about like the comings

1069
00:55:11,560 --> 00:55:13,840
Speaker 5: and goings, and he's got the schedule down a routine.

1070
00:55:13,840 --> 00:55:15,520
Speaker 5: I was like, I could be a quartermaster in my

1071
00:55:15,600 --> 00:55:18,239
Speaker 5: own home. So it wasn't it was like it has.

1072
00:55:18,320 --> 00:55:22,000
Speaker 5: It's about showing people that there there is a male

1073
00:55:22,160 --> 00:55:25,680
Speaker 5: version of everything we say is like female, right, So

1074
00:55:25,760 --> 00:55:28,720
Speaker 5: like for me that was like just being a quarter

1075
00:55:28,719 --> 00:55:32,279
Speaker 5: master in my own home, understanding that, like we're good

1076
00:55:32,280 --> 00:55:34,279
Speaker 5: for paper towels right now, because we are so good.

1077
00:55:34,320 --> 00:55:36,359
Speaker 5: I wish I could show you on the other side

1078
00:55:36,360 --> 00:55:39,240
Speaker 5: as well. We are so good. I'm not a doomsday prepper,

1079
00:55:39,280 --> 00:55:42,960
Speaker 5: but we good like TPPT like all that kind of stuff.

1080
00:55:43,040 --> 00:55:47,360
Speaker 5: Like I needed that to make it okay for me

1081
00:55:47,520 --> 00:55:50,319
Speaker 5: to you know, be a man and then also worry

1082
00:55:50,360 --> 00:55:52,759
Speaker 5: about this stuff. Of course, I think people are on

1083
00:55:52,800 --> 00:55:56,319
Speaker 5: a spectrum. You're always in touch with like you're feminine side.

1084
00:55:56,320 --> 00:55:58,040
Speaker 5: I don't like show tunes or anything like that. But

1085
00:55:58,239 --> 00:55:59,840
Speaker 5: there's part of me that, like, you know, I was,

1086
00:56:00,040 --> 00:56:01,880
Speaker 5: you know, my son we went skiing this weekend and

1087
00:56:03,080 --> 00:56:04,680
Speaker 5: I was like, you know what we're gonna do because

1088
00:56:04,680 --> 00:56:06,279
Speaker 5: we're driving, and I was like, we're gonna put on

1089
00:56:06,320 --> 00:56:08,839
Speaker 5: Aretha for like an hour, like so he just listened

1090
00:56:08,840 --> 00:56:11,279
Speaker 5: at Ytha Franklin because we were like listen to so

1091
00:56:11,440 --> 00:56:13,200
Speaker 5: much hip hop. I was like, we're gonna put on

1092
00:56:13,239 --> 00:56:17,120
Speaker 5: Aretha so that you understanding. Yeah, yeah, so we get

1093
00:56:17,120 --> 00:56:19,719
Speaker 5: some feminine energy in here too, you know. So like

1094
00:56:19,800 --> 00:56:22,600
Speaker 5: I feel like I feel like I'm always in touch

1095
00:56:22,600 --> 00:56:24,920
Speaker 5: because like my mom raised me more than my dad

1096
00:56:24,960 --> 00:56:27,200
Speaker 5: because my dad was always working at the hospital. So

1097
00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:29,799
Speaker 5: I was like, that's never far away from me. So

1098
00:56:29,840 --> 00:56:32,759
Speaker 5: I'm comfortable with that. But not, you know, not every

1099
00:56:32,760 --> 00:56:34,680
Speaker 5: guy is you know, not every guy is like, not

1100
00:56:34,719 --> 00:56:39,840
Speaker 5: every guy can beat me, but but period, right, so uh,

1101
00:56:41,280 --> 00:56:43,680
Speaker 5: I'll have a rose as well every once in a while.

1102
00:56:44,400 --> 00:56:47,080
Speaker 5: No one's looking, no one's keeping score. You know, it's

1103
00:56:47,120 --> 00:56:50,239
Speaker 5: all good. But I think that, yeah, you have to

1104
00:56:50,280 --> 00:56:55,000
Speaker 5: get over the feeling of being feminine or something like that,

1105
00:56:55,239 --> 00:56:58,320
Speaker 5: because being masculine that that's just like it's a heavyweight.

1106
00:56:58,480 --> 00:56:59,960
Speaker 5: Every day, it's a heavyweight to do that.

1107
00:57:01,560 --> 00:57:05,400
Speaker 2: Is there a female version like for the men of

1108
00:57:05,520 --> 00:57:08,480
Speaker 2: chour play, like what would be the I.

1109
00:57:08,400 --> 00:57:10,600
Speaker 5: Haven't read it, you know what I mean. I just

1110
00:57:10,640 --> 00:57:13,920
Speaker 5: haven't run into a messy girl yet. In my life, luckily,

1111
00:57:13,960 --> 00:57:18,320
Speaker 5: I'm with this type a situations, not.

1112
00:57:18,280 --> 00:57:22,040
Speaker 2: Necessarily like the chores, but like the thing that men

1113
00:57:22,120 --> 00:57:26,400
Speaker 2: would want more of, like the exactly opposite.

1114
00:57:26,400 --> 00:57:31,000
Speaker 5: You know, do we want something oh interesting? I mean

1115
00:57:31,840 --> 00:57:35,240
Speaker 5: that's right. I was only going to say this, like

1116
00:57:35,560 --> 00:57:39,280
Speaker 5: which is the direct line between like if you give

1117
00:57:39,320 --> 00:57:41,680
Speaker 5: something a week? Right, Like if you like I made

1118
00:57:41,680 --> 00:57:43,400
Speaker 5: coffee for my wife for like a week, you give

1119
00:57:43,400 --> 00:57:45,640
Speaker 5: it a week, like. I mean, I wanted to just

1120
00:57:45,720 --> 00:57:49,320
Speaker 5: touch on like the sex part, which is like which

1121
00:57:49,440 --> 00:57:52,440
Speaker 5: was an outcome that was definitely I did not expect.

1122
00:57:52,520 --> 00:57:54,000
Speaker 5: I was just trying to say my marriage. I didn't

1123
00:57:54,040 --> 00:57:57,520
Speaker 5: know how much, like how much better our romantic life

1124
00:57:57,680 --> 00:58:01,560
Speaker 5: would get from that. But then and researching the book,

1125
00:58:02,600 --> 00:58:07,040
Speaker 5: I looked at like Maslow's like pyramid of needs, right,

1126
00:58:07,120 --> 00:58:10,200
Speaker 5: which is like you need food and shelter and all

1127
00:58:10,240 --> 00:58:12,560
Speaker 5: these things before you get to the top is self

1128
00:58:12,560 --> 00:58:15,920
Speaker 5: actualization meaning just like you know, a good life whatever

1129
00:58:15,960 --> 00:58:20,440
Speaker 5: it is. So I think wed with self actualization is

1130
00:58:20,480 --> 00:58:24,760
Speaker 5: also like sex, like you're not gonna we said it

1131
00:58:24,760 --> 00:58:29,880
Speaker 5: already if the room is messy, Like my wife's not

1132
00:58:29,920 --> 00:58:31,520
Speaker 5: gonna want to smash at all. Right.

1133
00:58:32,320 --> 00:58:36,040
Speaker 2: I just feel like Maslow's hierarchy of needs, yeah, updated

1134
00:58:36,080 --> 00:58:43,720
Speaker 2: because I feel like miss food shelter pussy right behind

1135
00:58:43,760 --> 00:58:45,360
Speaker 2: each other. I don't think it's all the way at

1136
00:58:45,360 --> 00:58:46,760
Speaker 2: the top. I really don't.

1137
00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:50,480
Speaker 5: They need tape. They need electrical tape.

1138
00:58:52,240 --> 00:58:54,080
Speaker 3: Shelter pussy, electrical tape.

1139
00:58:55,680 --> 00:58:56,080
Speaker 5: Right.

1140
00:59:00,680 --> 00:59:04,600
Speaker 4: It definitely is different between men and women, but.

1141
00:59:04,640 --> 00:59:07,120
Speaker 5: We need to understand that. We need to understand what

1142
00:59:07,200 --> 00:59:10,600
Speaker 5: your partner's hierarchy of needs is, right, So it's about

1143
00:59:10,680 --> 00:59:13,520
Speaker 5: understanding you can't just like shut it off at your

1144
00:59:13,560 --> 00:59:16,480
Speaker 5: own point of view. There's two people in this. It's

1145
00:59:16,480 --> 00:59:21,680
Speaker 5: a weed, yeah, and like and and and learning what

1146
00:59:21,920 --> 00:59:25,560
Speaker 5: she needs security. That's a feeling of security when things

1147
00:59:25,600 --> 00:59:28,040
Speaker 5: are in order and in place, right, So that can

1148
00:59:28,120 --> 00:59:32,720
Speaker 5: just make for a much better atmosphere because then we

1149
00:59:32,800 --> 00:59:36,600
Speaker 5: kind of like stop being like, oh, we haven't hooked

1150
00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:40,680
Speaker 5: up in a long time, what's going on? We ain't

1151
00:59:40,720 --> 00:59:43,440
Speaker 5: doing this and that anymore, you know. And it's like

1152
00:59:43,640 --> 00:59:47,480
Speaker 5: sex was more of like a chore rights as kind

1153
00:59:47,520 --> 00:59:50,760
Speaker 5: of like a way to make sure that that we

1154
00:59:50,880 --> 00:59:53,240
Speaker 5: kept going and that you know, like we weren't off

1155
00:59:53,280 --> 00:59:55,480
Speaker 5: track instead of just like a fun thing that we

1156
00:59:55,480 --> 00:59:57,320
Speaker 5: could squeeze in while the kids are away at school

1157
00:59:57,360 --> 00:59:59,360
Speaker 5: or something like that. You know. So it's it's like,

1158
01:00:00,280 --> 01:00:04,040
Speaker 5: it feels like that point, and I feel very lucky.

1159
01:00:04,120 --> 01:00:05,720
Speaker 5: I feel very lucky in that because not a lot

1160
01:00:05,720 --> 01:00:09,640
Speaker 5: of people that are like kicking forty six in the

1161
01:00:09,680 --> 01:00:12,960
Speaker 5: ass are able to like say that they just have

1162
01:00:13,040 --> 01:00:15,960
Speaker 5: that kind of fun with their wife, you know, like.

1163
01:00:15,360 --> 01:00:17,840
Speaker 2: Like sometimes we're on the phone at night and she's belack, girl,

1164
01:00:17,960 --> 01:00:19,800
Speaker 2: let me just go suck his deck real quick.

1165
01:00:19,840 --> 01:00:20,680
Speaker 3: I will call you back.

1166
01:00:23,720 --> 01:00:25,800
Speaker 2: It just sounds so much like a tour, like let

1167
01:00:25,800 --> 01:00:28,800
Speaker 2: me just put this in bed. I mean, I'll call

1168
01:00:28,840 --> 01:00:29,360
Speaker 2: you right bag.

1169
01:00:31,360 --> 01:00:33,760
Speaker 5: You are wolent, that is tam You have the funniest

1170
01:00:33,760 --> 01:00:38,480
Speaker 5: friends of it. I mean that never have I ever.

1171
01:00:38,560 --> 01:00:40,280
Speaker 5: I wish that was my life, but that is not

1172
01:00:40,360 --> 01:00:44,320
Speaker 5: my life. Like my wife's never like let me grocery

1173
01:00:44,360 --> 01:00:49,640
Speaker 5: is done, okay, let me come like this did never.

1174
01:00:50,960 --> 01:00:52,840
Speaker 5: But yeah, but if you but that's a red flag

1175
01:00:52,880 --> 01:00:56,440
Speaker 5: if you're there at that point, you know, that just

1176
01:00:56,480 --> 01:01:00,400
Speaker 5: shows no desire, right, and if desire is dead, then

1177
01:01:00,720 --> 01:01:03,200
Speaker 5: what are we doing? But it's all all these things

1178
01:01:03,240 --> 01:01:06,040
Speaker 5: work in concert with each other. Like so you know,

1179
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:09,240
Speaker 5: taking my I kind of was like a I mean

1180
01:01:10,000 --> 01:01:11,720
Speaker 5: just I was just out of shape, like I was.

1181
01:01:11,840 --> 01:01:13,720
Speaker 5: I wasn't like that much overweight, but I was out

1182
01:01:13,720 --> 01:01:16,400
Speaker 5: of shape. So like y'all were saying, with the rickety

1183
01:01:16,480 --> 01:01:18,960
Speaker 5: arms and everything like that, like I started to go

1184
01:01:19,480 --> 01:01:22,120
Speaker 5: to the gym work on like kettle bell and stuff

1185
01:01:22,160 --> 01:01:25,800
Speaker 5: like that. Didn't ever think Never did I ever I mean,

1186
01:01:25,840 --> 01:01:28,160
Speaker 5: look at me, I'm like, I look like Arkle's stunt double.

1187
01:01:28,240 --> 01:01:30,240
Speaker 5: Like never ever did I think that that would like

1188
01:01:31,640 --> 01:01:34,120
Speaker 5: that's you're very kind. Okay, let me go from Steve

1189
01:01:34,160 --> 01:01:39,560
Speaker 5: to Stefan all right, so like, but never did I

1190
01:01:39,600 --> 01:01:41,320
Speaker 5: ever think that that would like have some kind of

1191
01:01:41,360 --> 01:01:45,600
Speaker 5: correlation like losing the way getting like getting more solid,

1192
01:01:45,760 --> 01:01:49,680
Speaker 5: solid core and all that kind of stuff. Like you Like,

1193
01:01:50,120 --> 01:01:51,840
Speaker 5: my wife is the kind of person where she's like

1194
01:01:52,560 --> 01:01:56,200
Speaker 5: she loves personality, she loves conversation, she loves talking, and

1195
01:01:56,280 --> 01:02:00,320
Speaker 5: that that is very like romantic to her. But I

1196
01:02:00,320 --> 01:02:03,320
Speaker 5: always I was like, okay, we have tried these things.

1197
01:02:03,360 --> 01:02:05,880
Speaker 5: We have tried talking, we've tried romance like let me

1198
01:02:05,920 --> 01:02:09,040
Speaker 5: open up new paths and corridors in my life, like

1199
01:02:09,160 --> 01:02:12,280
Speaker 5: and see see what else I can be, you know,

1200
01:02:12,720 --> 01:02:15,720
Speaker 5: and and again, don't be revolution I was trying not

1201
01:02:15,760 --> 01:02:17,680
Speaker 5: to be revolutionary about it. I was just trying to

1202
01:02:17,680 --> 01:02:19,360
Speaker 5: be like gradual about it because I was sick of

1203
01:02:20,120 --> 01:02:23,200
Speaker 5: the mode that I was I was I'd been in previously,

1204
01:02:23,280 --> 01:02:23,960
Speaker 5: if that makes sense.

1205
01:02:29,320 --> 01:02:31,200
Speaker 3: A j you have a game you want to play?

1206
01:02:31,520 --> 01:02:35,920
Speaker 2: Oh god, right quick, Okay, it's called who Does This?

1207
01:02:36,800 --> 01:02:38,560
Speaker 5: By the way, I'm having fun on this show. This

1208
01:02:38,680 --> 01:02:40,880
Speaker 5: is really it is really fun.

1209
01:02:41,120 --> 01:02:43,360
Speaker 4: Get about ten more minutes out of you, all right.

1210
01:02:44,160 --> 01:02:47,400
Speaker 4: More so, the game is who who does this? And

1211
01:02:47,720 --> 01:02:51,720
Speaker 4: you would select more likely men, more likely women or

1212
01:02:51,840 --> 01:02:53,280
Speaker 4: both are your options.

1213
01:02:53,680 --> 01:02:55,320
Speaker 5: Do you see do you see the pain already edged

1214
01:02:55,360 --> 01:03:00,760
Speaker 5: on my face? I'm like, I'm ready, I'm ready.

1215
01:03:01,000 --> 01:03:03,360
Speaker 4: And it's just overall relationship, not even just about cleaning

1216
01:03:03,400 --> 01:03:08,320
Speaker 4: and stuff. So okay, this first one keeps score in arguments.

1217
01:03:08,080 --> 01:03:14,520
Speaker 5: Keep scoring arguments. Who does this? Keep scoring an argument?

1218
01:03:15,160 --> 01:03:19,680
Speaker 5: Mm hmm. It's got to be women. It's got to

1219
01:03:19,680 --> 01:03:23,280
Speaker 5: be women. Hey, I feel like you don't know, it's

1220
01:03:23,320 --> 01:03:25,200
Speaker 5: got to be women. But I try to be like them.

1221
01:03:25,400 --> 01:03:27,160
Speaker 5: I'm always trying to be like, you know, let's go back,

1222
01:03:27,240 --> 01:03:30,200
Speaker 5: let's go way back, and like try to remember, get

1223
01:03:30,200 --> 01:03:33,360
Speaker 5: the files out. I can never remember the date. But yes,

1224
01:03:33,640 --> 01:03:36,680
Speaker 5: I think it's women. They're better at it them men, all.

1225
01:03:36,680 --> 01:03:42,040
Speaker 3: Right, the next one who wants recognition for effort? Women?

1226
01:03:42,200 --> 01:03:42,800
Speaker 3: Men are both.

1227
01:03:44,800 --> 01:03:47,360
Speaker 5: I think both want it, but men want it more.

1228
01:03:48,880 --> 01:03:50,680
Speaker 5: I think both wanted, but men want it more for

1229
01:03:50,760 --> 01:03:54,360
Speaker 5: doing less. Women wanted and it's never it's like never

1230
01:03:54,520 --> 01:03:56,880
Speaker 5: seen and like you've got to be like you got

1231
01:03:57,000 --> 01:04:00,360
Speaker 5: to you gotta say thank you for this. If you

1232
01:04:00,360 --> 01:04:01,440
Speaker 5: say thank you for this.

1233
01:04:01,440 --> 01:04:11,240
Speaker 6: Oh my god, get some soul, I know, because she'll

1234
01:04:11,320 --> 01:04:12,320
Speaker 6: like say, I'm.

1235
01:04:12,160 --> 01:04:14,560
Speaker 5: Like, thanks for making their lunch this morning, thank you

1236
01:04:14,600 --> 01:04:19,640
Speaker 5: for that. She's just like some problem. It's my specialty.

1237
01:04:19,760 --> 01:04:22,960
Speaker 2: Easy shit. Women. Women are actually easier, I believe.

1238
01:04:24,280 --> 01:04:27,840
Speaker 5: Okay, okay, we love you, you know, yes.

1239
01:04:27,880 --> 01:04:32,440
Speaker 2: We just need one reason to stay, A.

1240
01:04:32,400 --> 01:04:34,080
Speaker 5: Million reasons to leave, just.

1241
01:04:34,040 --> 01:04:35,560
Speaker 2: One good reason to stay.

1242
01:04:36,040 --> 01:04:40,280
Speaker 4: Uh says nothing is wrong when something is clearly wrong.

1243
01:04:41,480 --> 01:04:44,240
Speaker 5: Says nothing is wrong with something that is. A man says,

1244
01:04:44,320 --> 01:04:47,800
Speaker 5: A man will like I agree, yeah, he will deny.

1245
01:04:48,160 --> 01:04:50,040
Speaker 2: I thought you were going to say women, I thought

1246
01:04:50,080 --> 01:04:54,360
Speaker 2: you were going to say, women like you always I

1247
01:04:54,360 --> 01:04:57,240
Speaker 2: feel like I always see a woman like walking around

1248
01:04:57,280 --> 01:04:59,600
Speaker 2: the house quiet and not saying she and the man like.

1249
01:05:01,800 --> 01:05:04,520
Speaker 5: Oh that way. I thought you meant denial, like like

1250
01:05:04,520 --> 01:05:05,960
Speaker 5: like that is denial as well. But I thought you

1251
01:05:06,000 --> 01:05:08,640
Speaker 5: meant like like if there's clearly a problem in the

1252
01:05:08,680 --> 01:05:12,800
Speaker 5: relationship and he's like, why are you tripping? Everything's fine?

1253
01:05:12,920 --> 01:05:15,840
Speaker 5: You know, like like saying that everything is fine, that's

1254
01:05:15,880 --> 01:05:20,320
Speaker 5: a man thing, like yeah, but if there's something whoa,

1255
01:05:20,800 --> 01:05:23,520
Speaker 5: it's like jazz, it's the notes you don't play. Like

1256
01:05:23,800 --> 01:05:26,560
Speaker 5: when she's like, I'm like, I'm gonna go out get

1257
01:05:26,560 --> 01:05:28,920
Speaker 5: some beers with the boys, and she's like, yeah, go

1258
01:05:28,960 --> 01:05:32,160
Speaker 5: do that. That's fine, like I'm not going out, Like

1259
01:05:32,600 --> 01:05:39,920
Speaker 5: if it's tone, if it's tone like that, like no, no, no, no, no, no. Yeah,

1260
01:05:40,720 --> 01:05:45,600
Speaker 5: see what happens she's not if she doesn't say like

1261
01:05:45,600 --> 01:05:48,480
Speaker 5: I'm happy for you, you should do that, Like no,

1262
01:05:48,880 --> 01:05:52,720
Speaker 5: that's good. I love that guy. Sure, So I see

1263
01:05:52,760 --> 01:05:55,560
Speaker 5: what I see what you meant there. Sorry, these are

1264
01:05:55,600 --> 01:06:02,200
Speaker 5: good questions. Oh, go ahead with expectations that pitch oh

1265
01:06:02,720 --> 01:06:06,760
Speaker 5: does things with expectations attached. That is that is definitely

1266
01:06:06,800 --> 01:06:10,400
Speaker 5: some man stuff. I feel like, yeah, that is, I

1267
01:06:10,440 --> 01:06:14,800
Speaker 5: expect ticker tape parade. I expect, like you know, school

1268
01:06:14,840 --> 01:06:22,560
Speaker 5: will be suspended, banks close, Yes, yeah, expects.

1269
01:06:22,080 --> 01:06:24,920
Speaker 4: Their partner to read their minds.

1270
01:06:25,680 --> 01:06:27,960
Speaker 5: Expects a partner to read their minds. That is that

1271
01:06:28,120 --> 01:06:31,120
Speaker 5: women do that. Women do do that, But I also

1272
01:06:31,240 --> 01:06:36,960
Speaker 5: feel that, but but I feel it's probably men more that. Yeah,

1273
01:06:37,120 --> 01:06:40,480
Speaker 5: it's memo. I agree, yeah, because we want to be

1274
01:06:40,560 --> 01:06:45,840
Speaker 5: treated as we would treat others, and we don't always

1275
01:06:46,760 --> 01:06:50,720
Speaker 5: express what we need or want in the moment, and

1276
01:06:50,760 --> 01:06:52,439
Speaker 5: it comes back to bite us in the ass man

1277
01:06:52,800 --> 01:06:53,920
Speaker 5: like it's real bad.

1278
01:06:54,080 --> 01:06:57,440
Speaker 4: Implicitly state what it is that they need, you just

1279
01:06:57,640 --> 01:06:59,760
Speaker 4: close to know, and then if you don't know, then

1280
01:06:59,800 --> 01:07:03,120
Speaker 4: it's like men are not as simple as they like

1281
01:07:03,200 --> 01:07:03,560
Speaker 4: to say.

1282
01:07:04,240 --> 01:07:07,600
Speaker 5: We're very complicated. We're very complicated. I mean, listen, the

1283
01:07:07,600 --> 01:07:09,840
Speaker 5: most complicated thing that my wife does is say that

1284
01:07:09,880 --> 01:07:12,320
Speaker 5: she doesn't want anything for Valentine's Day when she clearly

1285
01:07:12,320 --> 01:07:14,600
Speaker 5: wants something done for Valentine's Day, Like she does that

1286
01:07:14,720 --> 01:07:18,680
Speaker 5: every year and every year, like I have a panic attack,

1287
01:07:19,080 --> 01:07:24,120
Speaker 5: but but that's about it. Like for me, I know,

1288
01:07:24,200 --> 01:07:26,880
Speaker 5: I'm low key like, oh my god, you ate the

1289
01:07:26,960 --> 01:07:29,880
Speaker 5: last of this in the refrigerator. I didn't put my

1290
01:07:30,000 --> 01:07:32,560
Speaker 5: name on it. I didn't tell anybody that I wanted it.

1291
01:07:33,240 --> 01:07:35,280
Speaker 5: But everybody's gonna pay for it later, you know what

1292
01:07:35,280 --> 01:07:42,440
Speaker 5: I'm saying. Like, because I'm an Aquarius, so that's we're

1293
01:07:42,480 --> 01:07:44,280
Speaker 5: both me and my wife are both aquariuses.

1294
01:07:44,600 --> 01:07:47,240
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you got it.

1295
01:07:49,680 --> 01:07:49,760
Speaker 5: Now.

1296
01:07:49,800 --> 01:07:51,960
Speaker 2: I didn't have got out there aquarius. That was with man.

1297
01:07:52,000 --> 01:07:53,760
Speaker 4: He took a shower just as much as I did.

1298
01:07:53,800 --> 01:07:56,040
Speaker 4: He cleaned up just as much as I did. Like

1299
01:07:56,480 --> 01:07:58,360
Speaker 4: that wasn't a problem with the aquarius.

1300
01:07:58,680 --> 01:08:02,240
Speaker 5: Aquarius is often will do whatever you want them to do.

1301
01:08:02,880 --> 01:08:06,200
Speaker 5: So it's like we our survival mode is like we

1302
01:08:06,240 --> 01:08:08,920
Speaker 5: don't argue. We go with the flow.

1303
01:08:10,880 --> 01:08:14,920
Speaker 2: Y'all create arguments calmly, and you get to a hundred,

1304
01:08:15,240 --> 01:08:15,960
Speaker 2: they're looking.

1305
01:08:15,760 --> 01:08:17,360
Speaker 3: At you like it's not that serious.

1306
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:20,720
Speaker 4: There, get some ship after you don't got me on

1307
01:08:20,760 --> 01:08:24,080
Speaker 4: a hunt? Yeah, like that's what aquarias do.

1308
01:08:25,360 --> 01:08:27,840
Speaker 5: Oh my god, I can't speak for all uses. I

1309
01:08:27,880 --> 01:08:28,360
Speaker 5: can't speak.

1310
01:08:29,600 --> 01:08:32,599
Speaker 2: What about this one apologizes just to in an argument,

1311
01:08:32,720 --> 01:08:33,400
Speaker 2: not because.

1312
01:08:33,200 --> 01:08:36,160
Speaker 3: They mean it, but just to stop the argument from it.

1313
01:08:37,400 --> 01:08:39,559
Speaker 5: That is a man thing right there. I will do it.

1314
01:08:39,680 --> 01:08:40,920
Speaker 5: I'll jump on the grenade.

1315
01:08:41,479 --> 01:08:42,360
Speaker 3: I just want to stop.

1316
01:08:43,560 --> 01:08:46,880
Speaker 5: I'm gonna tell you a quick story. All right. Women now,

1317
01:08:47,000 --> 01:08:49,640
Speaker 5: Women now are wearing like the trench coats in New

1318
01:08:49,720 --> 01:08:52,560
Speaker 5: York City. They like these kind of like like detective

1319
01:08:52,680 --> 01:08:56,479
Speaker 5: trench coats right out here, solved mysteries as very fashionable

1320
01:08:56,479 --> 01:09:00,400
Speaker 5: for women in Manhattan to wear them. I had one Shindy,

1321
01:09:00,479 --> 01:09:03,320
Speaker 5: your vintage trench coat that I liked a lot about

1322
01:09:03,400 --> 01:09:06,679
Speaker 5: ten years ago. My wife says, ugly, throw it out.

1323
01:09:07,479 --> 01:09:09,439
Speaker 5: I was like, but Babe, I think it's cool. I

1324
01:09:09,479 --> 01:09:12,040
Speaker 5: think she's like, who wears that? Throw it out? You

1325
01:09:12,080 --> 01:09:15,360
Speaker 5: look crazy. I was like, okay, okay, So I threw

1326
01:09:15,360 --> 01:09:15,639
Speaker 5: it out.

1327
01:09:15,920 --> 01:09:16,759
Speaker 3: Thick the gadget.

1328
01:09:18,680 --> 01:09:20,920
Speaker 5: I love this spect your gadget, Penny would solve all

1329
01:09:20,920 --> 01:09:31,000
Speaker 5: the mysteries. Come on brain right, summer lifted that show? Okay, Penny,

1330
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:34,080
Speaker 5: all right, all right, So anyway back called track speaking

1331
01:09:34,120 --> 01:09:39,639
Speaker 5: of adhd h recently, guess what came back in style?

1332
01:09:40,360 --> 01:09:43,559
Speaker 5: All the all the women wearing these. She goes, Babe,

1333
01:09:43,560 --> 01:09:45,920
Speaker 5: look at this online. It's from a ritzy Look at

1334
01:09:45,960 --> 01:09:50,320
Speaker 5: I want it? Will you buy it from me? Well,

1335
01:09:50,360 --> 01:09:54,920
Speaker 5: I buy it if you apologize to me for ten

1336
01:09:54,960 --> 01:09:58,360
Speaker 5: years ago, I will buy it. World War three, World

1337
01:09:58,400 --> 01:10:04,920
Speaker 5: War three this way exactly exactly. But everything's cool now,

1338
01:10:05,080 --> 01:10:06,840
Speaker 5: everything's fine. I bought it.

1339
01:10:07,360 --> 01:10:08,240
Speaker 3: Did she apologize?

1340
01:10:09,240 --> 01:10:12,800
Speaker 5: Never lost that war. You have to you have to

1341
01:10:12,840 --> 01:10:16,320
Speaker 5: know when to shut the fuck up. That's why. That's why.

1342
01:10:16,360 --> 01:10:17,559
Speaker 5: At the beginning of this, I was like, do they

1343
01:10:17,600 --> 01:10:19,080
Speaker 5: want me to talk? I don't know when when to

1344
01:10:19,160 --> 01:10:25,839
Speaker 5: talk with it. I was glitching. I was glitching, especially

1345
01:10:25,840 --> 01:10:26,720
Speaker 5: coming on call.

1346
01:10:26,800 --> 01:10:28,240
Speaker 3: We talked back with some black women.

1347
01:10:32,680 --> 01:10:35,240
Speaker 5: I know you from the Carolinas too. I'm like, oh lord,

1348
01:10:35,520 --> 01:10:37,439
Speaker 5: I gotta know how to present myself. Here we go,

1349
01:10:37,479 --> 01:10:37,880
Speaker 5: Here we go.

1350
01:10:39,920 --> 01:10:43,840
Speaker 4: Do you thinks effort should lead to more intimacy?

1351
01:10:45,479 --> 01:10:48,320
Speaker 5: Ooh, thinks effort should lead to more intimacy. I mean,

1352
01:10:48,360 --> 01:10:55,040
Speaker 5: I wrote a whole damn book about this. I think, Okay,

1353
01:10:55,280 --> 01:10:58,720
Speaker 5: thanks effort. Yes, yes, that's a guy thing. But you

1354
01:10:58,840 --> 01:11:00,960
Speaker 5: got to be like, got to be like Yoda with

1355
01:11:01,000 --> 01:11:03,080
Speaker 5: this ship. You gotta it's like the force. You can't

1356
01:11:03,120 --> 01:11:05,439
Speaker 5: want it. If you want it, it's not gonna happen.

1357
01:11:06,120 --> 01:11:08,479
Speaker 5: You gotta you got to just do the thing and

1358
01:11:08,600 --> 01:11:12,160
Speaker 5: it will happen. It's like, but you can't force it.

1359
01:11:12,600 --> 01:11:15,240
Speaker 5: So I'm saying that's a man thing. But I'm trying

1360
01:11:15,280 --> 01:11:23,120
Speaker 5: to educate as well, just saying.

1361
01:11:20,760 --> 01:11:24,639
Speaker 2: Yeah, stop stops doing something, just to see if their

1362
01:11:24,680 --> 01:11:26,000
Speaker 2: partner notices that's.

1363
01:11:25,920 --> 01:11:34,240
Speaker 5: A woman, diabolical, diabolical, Like my wife has stopped cooking.

1364
01:11:34,600 --> 01:11:40,800
Speaker 5: She stopped cooking. Mm hmm, it's it's it's a it's

1365
01:11:40,800 --> 01:11:43,800
Speaker 5: a fraught time over here. She stopped cooking because she

1366
01:11:43,880 --> 01:11:46,920
Speaker 5: teaches night classes. She's a professor, so three days out

1367
01:11:46,920 --> 01:11:50,200
Speaker 5: of the week she's she's gone and doing that. So

1368
01:11:50,240 --> 01:11:52,799
Speaker 5: I'm like, okay, I gotta step up and cook. And

1369
01:11:52,920 --> 01:11:55,000
Speaker 5: that's what I've been doing. And you got to cook,

1370
01:11:55,680 --> 01:11:57,760
Speaker 5: but you also got to put a silencer on it too.

1371
01:11:57,920 --> 01:12:01,840
Speaker 5: You can't be like and me doing all to cook it.

1372
01:12:02,560 --> 01:12:06,880
Speaker 5: And because then I asked you, So I've been doing

1373
01:12:06,920 --> 01:12:10,320
Speaker 5: this for months now, and I asked my son, I said,

1374
01:12:10,720 --> 01:12:14,720
Speaker 5: I said, Malcolm, like, who who cooks? As much like

1375
01:12:14,800 --> 01:12:18,479
Speaker 5: mommy's Daddy's like who cooks Mommy or daddy? He's like Mommy,

1376
01:12:18,600 --> 01:12:25,040
Speaker 5: I'm like, motherfucker, I I made you nuggets from scratch,

1377
01:12:25,360 --> 01:12:29,799
Speaker 5: Like what are you talking about? You were watching the Simpsons,

1378
01:12:29,840 --> 01:12:33,559
Speaker 5: I was over here whatever, you know, Like that's that's

1379
01:12:33,560 --> 01:12:34,040
Speaker 5: what it is.

1380
01:12:34,280 --> 01:12:40,240
Speaker 2: So yes, yeah, believes they're the better partner.

1381
01:12:41,640 --> 01:12:44,280
Speaker 5: Believes are the better partner. Men always believe it. Men,

1382
01:12:44,479 --> 01:12:47,599
Speaker 5: we always believe we did did amazingly well. We over

1383
01:12:47,920 --> 01:12:51,559
Speaker 5: in my research, we over hype ourselves with the confidence

1384
01:12:51,600 --> 01:12:54,439
Speaker 5: that we like, we're over confident in our performance all

1385
01:12:54,479 --> 01:12:54,840
Speaker 5: the time.

1386
01:12:55,200 --> 01:12:57,840
Speaker 2: I thought women women believe.

1387
01:12:57,920 --> 01:13:00,559
Speaker 4: I think because I do think sometimes women believe that

1388
01:13:00,640 --> 01:13:02,639
Speaker 4: they can do no wrong in a relationship. Like it's

1389
01:13:02,680 --> 01:13:05,400
Speaker 4: always the man, Like, when are you going to think

1390
01:13:05,439 --> 01:13:07,840
Speaker 4: about some ship you might have contributed to in the

1391
01:13:07,880 --> 01:13:09,559
Speaker 4: relationship that caused at the end.

1392
01:13:09,600 --> 01:13:11,559
Speaker 2: You know, so I thought you would say, women.

1393
01:13:11,439 --> 01:13:13,760
Speaker 5: Hey, push back, tell me, tell me, tell me I'm wrong,

1394
01:13:14,240 --> 01:13:16,439
Speaker 5: tell me I'm wrong, because because from where I'm standing,

1395
01:13:16,600 --> 01:13:19,400
Speaker 5: it's always been I'm just saying I think she has

1396
01:13:19,479 --> 01:13:21,360
Speaker 5: been the better partner in this relationship.

1397
01:13:21,760 --> 01:13:24,160
Speaker 3: Just agree with that.

1398
01:13:24,320 --> 01:13:28,920
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm like, I feel like I

1399
01:13:29,000 --> 01:13:29,719
Speaker 5: think it's both.

1400
01:13:30,439 --> 01:13:31,360
Speaker 3: I think it's both.

1401
01:13:31,840 --> 01:13:32,080
Speaker 5: Yeah.

1402
01:13:32,120 --> 01:13:34,839
Speaker 3: Absolutely, everybody think they're the better partner.

1403
01:13:35,080 --> 01:13:37,479
Speaker 2: Every like man like, yeah, my ex was crazy as hell,

1404
01:13:37,960 --> 01:13:40,520
Speaker 2: and then one was like he was such a bad communicator,

1405
01:13:40,640 --> 01:13:42,639
Speaker 2: Like I was just the best communicator he couldn't.

1406
01:13:42,720 --> 01:13:45,360
Speaker 3: Like it's always everybody thinks they're the best.

1407
01:13:45,600 --> 01:13:45,760
Speaker 5: Ever.

1408
01:13:45,880 --> 01:13:48,599
Speaker 4: I see this post on Instagram and I commented on it,

1409
01:13:48,640 --> 01:13:50,800
Speaker 4: got thousands of comments and likes on it.

1410
01:13:51,479 --> 01:13:51,639
Speaker 5: Uh.

1411
01:13:51,920 --> 01:13:53,719
Speaker 4: The post was a guy like driving down the shoot

1412
01:13:53,720 --> 01:13:55,160
Speaker 4: in his drop top and he was like, you know

1413
01:13:55,200 --> 01:13:57,360
Speaker 4: you a crazy bitch of a man. Got to tell you,

1414
01:13:57,439 --> 01:13:58,360
Speaker 4: let's have a good day.

1415
01:13:58,280 --> 01:13:59,440
Speaker 3: To day babe.

1416
01:14:01,160 --> 01:14:05,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, after that, nigga ruined the day before, after you

1417
01:14:05,479 --> 01:14:07,360
Speaker 4: ruined the day Now you're telling me this a good

1418
01:14:07,479 --> 01:14:10,320
Speaker 4: day after you don't cause some bullshito.

1419
01:14:11,280 --> 01:14:14,639
Speaker 2: No, nigga, I'm knocking it over today too. I'm not done.

1420
01:14:14,680 --> 01:14:19,720
Speaker 2: I had to take a nap and I got I

1421
01:14:19,760 --> 01:14:21,960
Speaker 2: got a messy meme for today right quick too. It

1422
01:14:22,000 --> 01:14:25,759
Speaker 2: says I being I love beating a dead dead horse.

1423
01:14:25,840 --> 01:14:32,720
Speaker 2: I'll give a fuck I get something else to say.

1424
01:14:32,760 --> 01:14:35,719
Speaker 5: That's true though, Oh my god, oh my god. Yeah,

1425
01:14:35,840 --> 01:14:38,280
Speaker 5: I would never. I never tell a woman to calm down,

1426
01:14:38,400 --> 01:14:40,640
Speaker 5: never tell her to have a good day. Like I

1427
01:14:40,720 --> 01:14:41,280
Speaker 5: never told my.

1428
01:14:41,240 --> 01:14:44,680
Speaker 3: Wife that you have a good day.

1429
01:14:47,479 --> 01:14:50,120
Speaker 5: After I pissed her off. Like what do you like? No?

1430
01:14:50,479 --> 01:14:52,040
Speaker 5: I mean that is like you got to be like

1431
01:14:52,120 --> 01:14:55,599
Speaker 5: the joker, like you're crazy doing stuff? Yeah, poking. Never

1432
01:14:56,240 --> 01:14:58,439
Speaker 5: Never A woman from Brooklyn in twenty.

1433
01:14:58,240 --> 01:15:01,840
Speaker 2: Twenty six, in this economy, Yeah.

1434
01:15:01,840 --> 01:15:04,439
Speaker 5: Let her cook, leave her alone, Leave her alone. That's

1435
01:15:04,439 --> 01:15:06,360
Speaker 5: how you stay married. That's how you stay bowed up.

1436
01:15:06,479 --> 01:15:10,439
Speaker 5: It's like understanding the person's their limits and taking a

1437
01:15:10,439 --> 01:15:13,080
Speaker 5: step back and understanding that, like, not everything. A lot

1438
01:15:13,080 --> 01:15:16,640
Speaker 5: of men don't understand that not every comment needs to

1439
01:15:16,640 --> 01:15:19,439
Speaker 5: be said. That's like, that's why men are always in

1440
01:15:19,439 --> 01:15:23,040
Speaker 5: the comments. We're like, we comment on everything. Not everything

1441
01:15:23,080 --> 01:15:26,519
Speaker 5: needs your opinion, you know, That's what it is. These

1442
01:15:26,520 --> 01:15:27,400
Speaker 5: are great questions.

1443
01:15:27,600 --> 01:15:28,639
Speaker 3: Are you going to do another one?

1444
01:15:28,720 --> 01:15:30,160
Speaker 2: I have no go ahead?

1445
01:15:30,200 --> 01:15:32,880
Speaker 3: Okay, so I have one closing question.

1446
01:15:33,360 --> 01:15:37,240
Speaker 2: Please, what's one thing people can start doing today to

1447
01:15:37,320 --> 01:15:40,559
Speaker 2: improve their relationship, Like right after they finished listening to

1448
01:15:40,640 --> 01:15:42,040
Speaker 2: this episode.

1449
01:15:42,120 --> 01:15:45,040
Speaker 5: Okay, one thing that they can do today. Like, if

1450
01:15:45,040 --> 01:15:47,280
Speaker 5: you're a guy, there's multiple things you can do, but

1451
01:15:47,720 --> 01:15:50,639
Speaker 5: one thing you can do is just I always say,

1452
01:15:50,680 --> 01:15:53,639
Speaker 5: like check on the toilet paper around the house. If

1453
01:15:53,640 --> 01:15:56,000
Speaker 5: that toilet paper. Let's say your girl came home from

1454
01:15:56,000 --> 01:16:00,200
Speaker 5: a long day work, just working their jobs with a

1455
01:16:00,280 --> 01:16:05,559
Speaker 5: boss that sucks, sits down on the towilet. She goes

1456
01:16:05,560 --> 01:16:09,160
Speaker 5: to the role and there's nothing there, and now she's

1457
01:16:09,160 --> 01:16:12,439
Speaker 5: got to do that. Hop to the to the pantry

1458
01:16:12,479 --> 01:16:17,400
Speaker 5: of cabinet, come on. Now check the bathrooms. If you're

1459
01:16:17,479 --> 01:16:21,400
Speaker 5: low on ammunition, so to speak, then change out the role.

1460
01:16:22,040 --> 01:16:25,000
Speaker 5: That will take two minutes tops, and it will save

1461
01:16:25,080 --> 01:16:31,040
Speaker 5: your relationship. That's I mean, I'm speaking from speaking from experience.

1462
01:16:31,200 --> 01:16:33,360
Speaker 3: I would like to add to that. Please, what's a

1463
01:16:33,479 --> 01:16:39,679
Speaker 3: toilet seat? The fuck learned?

1464
01:16:39,760 --> 01:16:42,280
Speaker 5: I've learned precision shots. I don't even put it up.

1465
01:16:42,360 --> 01:16:48,120
Speaker 5: I just precision precise that I'm a sniper. I'm a sniper.

1466
01:16:48,200 --> 01:16:50,120
Speaker 5: I don't even I don't even fuck around anymore.

1467
01:16:50,479 --> 01:16:56,200
Speaker 2: Uh I think that, and like, there's nothing worse than

1468
01:16:56,240 --> 01:16:57,559
Speaker 2: falling into a toilet seat.

1469
01:16:57,640 --> 01:16:59,800
Speaker 3: Now your ass is covered in toilet water.

1470
01:17:00,080 --> 01:17:01,639
Speaker 2: You touched it with your hands too.

1471
01:17:02,280 --> 01:17:04,639
Speaker 5: It's terrible. Just take a shower after that. I feel

1472
01:17:04,640 --> 01:17:08,559
Speaker 5: like this. Check on the milk, go to go to fridge,

1473
01:17:08,600 --> 01:17:11,479
Speaker 5: check on the milk. If the milk booboo. If the

1474
01:17:11,479 --> 01:17:14,320
Speaker 5: milk is at a quarter go to the store if

1475
01:17:14,320 --> 01:17:15,960
Speaker 5: it's if it's a quarter full. If you got one

1476
01:17:16,000 --> 01:17:20,000
Speaker 5: of those skinny ones because you're lazy, get a big

1477
01:17:20,040 --> 01:17:23,080
Speaker 5: one from the store. Get it done. That's all my

1478
01:17:23,120 --> 01:17:25,599
Speaker 5: wife ever does is like she's like the milk where

1479
01:17:25,960 --> 01:17:28,360
Speaker 5: the milk levels. One of the milk levels I'm like,

1480
01:17:28,720 --> 01:17:32,280
Speaker 5: she's christ. We can never go straight home. It was

1481
01:17:32,320 --> 01:17:35,320
Speaker 5: always like, is the milk in the house for tomorrow?

1482
01:17:35,360 --> 01:17:36,559
Speaker 5: I don't even drink milk, you know.

1483
01:17:36,520 --> 01:17:43,000
Speaker 2: But your wife, your wife white because Niggas is lactosega.

1484
01:17:44,160 --> 01:17:47,439
Speaker 5: She's half. She's half, so like that's why she talks

1485
01:17:47,479 --> 01:17:48,439
Speaker 5: like that. But like, but.

1486
01:17:52,479 --> 01:17:57,160
Speaker 2: Nigga, I would be thinking here with the little fucking milk.

1487
01:17:58,400 --> 01:18:00,639
Speaker 5: I don't drink it. I don't drinking, but I want

1488
01:18:00,640 --> 01:18:02,760
Speaker 5: to be happy, you know what I mean. So I'm like,

1489
01:18:02,920 --> 01:18:05,719
Speaker 5: so I go to Costco. I bomb this place of milk.

1490
01:18:05,960 --> 01:18:08,080
Speaker 5: You get to Costco. You can get three of the

1491
01:18:08,240 --> 01:18:11,559
Speaker 5: milk smells. You get a cow in there and like,

1492
01:18:11,680 --> 01:18:13,800
Speaker 5: and you can freeze. This is what I learned. You can.

1493
01:18:14,160 --> 01:18:16,200
Speaker 5: This woman taught me this. You can freeze milk. I

1494
01:18:16,200 --> 01:18:19,439
Speaker 5: didn't know that. Put that in a deep freezer comes out.

1495
01:18:20,520 --> 01:18:22,479
Speaker 5: I'm telling you, man, you just got to fight these

1496
01:18:22,560 --> 01:18:24,960
Speaker 5: little battles. It's the little cold because marriage is a

1497
01:18:25,000 --> 01:18:28,240
Speaker 5: cold war. You take if you get rid of that

1498
01:18:28,240 --> 01:18:32,400
Speaker 5: that ship that little like tit for tat, there's more

1499
01:18:32,800 --> 01:18:35,960
Speaker 5: I like this podcast, then there's more tits for you. Okay?

1500
01:18:36,240 --> 01:18:37,960
Speaker 5: Is that is that? Is that good? Is that in

1501
01:18:38,160 --> 01:18:39,760
Speaker 5: keeping with this podcast.

1502
01:18:41,760 --> 01:18:45,080
Speaker 4: With the vibe and I won't tat your.

1503
01:18:48,280 --> 01:18:51,480
Speaker 5: That's what I'm talking about. Yeah, all your things.

1504
01:18:51,240 --> 01:18:54,559
Speaker 3: Your yeah, yeah, everything, your book, all of it.

1505
01:18:54,960 --> 01:18:57,280
Speaker 5: Folks. You can reach me, like, okay, So if you

1506
01:18:57,320 --> 01:19:00,400
Speaker 5: just search on Instagram, I'm one of one Jordan Carlos,

1507
01:19:00,960 --> 01:19:04,320
Speaker 5: and then you can from there you can check out

1508
01:19:04,479 --> 01:19:08,000
Speaker 5: my website Jordan carloscomic dot com. You can you can

1509
01:19:08,080 --> 01:19:10,840
Speaker 5: check out on book chore play. There's links on the

1510
01:19:10,880 --> 01:19:14,519
Speaker 5: IG to find the book online and whatever like variation

1511
01:19:14,600 --> 01:19:17,120
Speaker 5: you want. If you want audiobook, that's not you. Uh,

1512
01:19:17,360 --> 01:19:20,320
Speaker 5: if you want like Kindle or whatever, it's there. It's

1513
01:19:20,360 --> 01:19:23,120
Speaker 5: doing well. We're very happy with the sales and I'm

1514
01:19:23,120 --> 01:19:26,120
Speaker 5: excited about it and like, yeah, just check me out

1515
01:19:26,200 --> 01:19:29,720
Speaker 5: and let's see this fall. You're gonna see me on Netflix.

1516
01:19:29,920 --> 01:19:31,600
Speaker 5: I'll be yeah.

1517
01:19:31,640 --> 01:19:35,519
Speaker 4: So, I mean, you did Black Mirror before I did.

1518
01:19:35,360 --> 01:19:38,799
Speaker 5: Black Mirror, but this time I saw I've been very fortunately,

1519
01:19:38,840 --> 01:19:43,800
Speaker 5: very blessed. I'm writing and acting in like Hotel Transylvania,

1520
01:19:43,880 --> 01:19:47,400
Speaker 5: the show on on Netflix, so which is really cool.

1521
01:19:47,439 --> 01:19:49,719
Speaker 5: And then you can check me out on a Sony

1522
01:19:49,720 --> 01:19:52,519
Speaker 5: PlayStation game because I play like a Voice of the AI,

1523
01:19:53,680 --> 01:19:56,120
Speaker 5: which I can I can't even say the name of

1524
01:19:56,200 --> 01:19:58,439
Speaker 5: a game, but it's like it's coming out. It'll be

1525
01:19:58,479 --> 01:20:01,640
Speaker 5: out in fall. Yeah, yeah, but but that's me, that's me.

1526
01:20:01,760 --> 01:20:05,439
Speaker 5: But you know what, Yes, check out the book, please, gentlemen,

1527
01:20:05,520 --> 01:20:09,400
Speaker 5: please okay, one one out of two, one out of

1528
01:20:09,400 --> 01:20:12,360
Speaker 5: two marriages and a divorce. We can stop that. We can,

1529
01:20:12,400 --> 01:20:15,120
Speaker 5: we can. We can do better than that.

1530
01:20:15,600 --> 01:20:18,160
Speaker 3: Doing guys work here trying.

1531
01:20:18,280 --> 01:20:20,760
Speaker 5: Y'all are doing guys work. Damn the people that you

1532
01:20:20,880 --> 01:20:22,920
Speaker 5: described that you're out here dating.

1533
01:20:23,760 --> 01:20:24,360
Speaker 3: Woe is me.

1534
01:20:24,520 --> 01:20:27,880
Speaker 2: Okay, listen, pray for me. Okay, pray for me out

1535
01:20:27,880 --> 01:20:29,240
Speaker 2: here this struggle.

1536
01:20:29,240 --> 01:20:31,120
Speaker 3: If you that's what I'm saying. If you have somebody's

1537
01:20:31,200 --> 01:20:34,720
Speaker 3: calt right now, please stick with them. Do the things work,

1538
01:20:34,800 --> 01:20:37,800
Speaker 3: because yes, dating pool got Dukie in it.

1539
01:20:42,360 --> 01:20:49,200
Speaker 5: That's not a snickerspar that is yeah. Get that little

1540
01:20:49,240 --> 01:20:50,920
Speaker 5: net all right, thank you, y'all.

1541
01:20:51,320 --> 01:20:55,760
Speaker 4: All right, y'all go pick up chore play by Jordan Carlos.

1542
01:20:55,840 --> 01:20:58,640
Speaker 4: All right, and if you enjoyed this episode, and if

1543
01:20:58,680 --> 01:21:00,960
Speaker 4: you enjoyed this episode, y'all tune in every Thursday on

1544
01:21:00,960 --> 01:21:02,840
Speaker 4: the iHeartRadio Apple where but the fuck you get your

1545
01:21:02,880 --> 01:21:03,599
Speaker 4: podcast at?

1546
01:21:03,600 --> 01:21:08,479
Speaker 2: This is your co host a j holiday grand spicking

1547
01:21:08,479 --> 01:21:08,920
Speaker 2: to what.

1548
01:21:11,240 --> 01:21:12,960
Speaker 5: Y'all have made me laugh the whole time because it's like,

1549
01:21:13,680 --> 01:21:16,000
Speaker 5: that's the thing about I am a comedian, but I

1550
01:21:16,040 --> 01:21:18,760
Speaker 5: wrote this book kind of like serious, but y'all have

1551
01:21:18,800 --> 01:21:21,360
Speaker 5: made me laugh, Like shar made me laugh the whole time.

1552
01:21:21,400 --> 01:21:23,800
Speaker 5: I was like, I was like, this is a serious thing,

1553
01:21:23,800 --> 01:21:25,479
Speaker 5: but He's like, you know, y'all are making me laugh.

1554
01:21:25,720 --> 01:21:26,479
Speaker 5: It's funny.

1555
01:21:27,080 --> 01:21:28,519
Speaker 3: And we don't take.

1556
01:21:28,439 --> 01:21:31,800
Speaker 2: Nothing ship serious, not too serious. This is lighthearted and fun.

1557
01:21:31,840 --> 01:21:34,080
Speaker 2: That's why we're here. Okay, we want to talk about

1558
01:21:34,080 --> 01:21:34,959
Speaker 2: serious things.

1559
01:21:34,720 --> 01:21:36,320
Speaker 3: But we want to have fun with it, you know.

1560
01:21:38,120 --> 01:21:39,360
Speaker 3: Thank you so much.

1561
01:21:39,800 --> 01:21:42,280
Speaker 2: Now, y'all, I'm official tam Bam. I love y'all so

1562
01:21:42,280 --> 01:21:44,920
Speaker 2: so very much. Thank y'all for tuning in. Y'all Follow

1563
01:21:44,960 --> 01:21:47,639
Speaker 2: me on Instagram Official tam Bam. Follow We Talk Back

1564
01:21:47,680 --> 01:21:53,360
Speaker 2: Podcasts on Instagram. Y'all speak now and never hold your chores,

1565
01:21:53,880 --> 01:21:55,360
Speaker 2: clean up after yourself.

1566
01:21:55,920 --> 01:21:57,560
Speaker 4: Yes, not a fucking.

1567
01:21:57,240 --> 01:22:04,639
Speaker 3: Kid, right? Why goddamn you're not gonna fuck your mom.

1568
01:22:06,000 --> 01:22:07,240
Speaker 2: One five times?

1569
01:22:07,280 --> 01:22:07,599
Speaker 5: Listen?

1570
01:22:07,840 --> 01:22:13,080
Speaker 2: Oh no, in the penis part, It's.

1571
01:22:12,960 --> 01:22:17,280
Speaker 3: True, It's true.

1572
01:22:17,800 --> 01:22:21,280
Speaker 1: We Talk Back Podcast is a production of iHeart Radio.

1573
01:22:21,439 --> 01:22:25,439
Speaker 1: Visit the iHeartRadio, app, Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen

1574
01:22:25,520 --> 01:22:26,519
Speaker 1: to your favorite shows.