1 00:00:00,200 --> 00:00:23,919 Speaker 1: Ridiculous History is a production of iHeartRadio. 2 00:00:26,880 --> 00:00:29,800 Speaker 2: Welcome back to the show, fellow Ridiculous Historians. Thank you, 3 00:00:29,880 --> 00:00:35,640 Speaker 2: as always so much for tuning in. Super Producer Max Williams, 4 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:39,239 Speaker 2: Noel Brown, Ben Bollen. Here we're in Media rests on 5 00:00:39,320 --> 00:00:40,519 Speaker 2: a crazy story. 6 00:00:40,760 --> 00:00:41,400 Speaker 3: It's true. 7 00:00:41,720 --> 00:00:44,199 Speaker 4: Let's jump right back into our conversation with Ben from 8 00:00:44,240 --> 00:00:47,760 Speaker 4: Badass of the Week on one of the most ridiculous 9 00:00:48,159 --> 00:00:50,159 Speaker 4: self owns in the history of combat. 10 00:00:57,080 --> 00:01:01,840 Speaker 2: So our boy is forty seven years old. In a 11 00:01:02,240 --> 00:01:09,240 Speaker 2: burst of humility, he sees himself as a superhuman figure. 12 00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:13,480 Speaker 5: Yes, yes, And so he marches two hundred and thirty 13 00:01:13,640 --> 00:01:18,640 Speaker 5: thousand soldiers to the border with Turkey or with the 14 00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:21,960 Speaker 5: Ottoman Empire and launches this attack. He divides him into 15 00:01:22,000 --> 00:01:26,280 Speaker 5: five armies. And you know, right now, at this time 16 00:01:26,280 --> 00:01:29,800 Speaker 5: period of the story, there's a pretty natural border between 17 00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:33,680 Speaker 5: the Austro Hungarian Empire and the Ottoman Empire, generally mountain 18 00:01:33,800 --> 00:01:36,080 Speaker 5: ranges and rivers, which is usually how we divide up 19 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:41,680 Speaker 5: property and humanity, right, And so he is going to 20 00:01:41,720 --> 00:01:44,280 Speaker 5: attack into Serbia. He's got a lot of support there. 21 00:01:44,319 --> 00:01:46,160 Speaker 5: He's going to liberate Belgrade's where he wants to go. 22 00:01:46,200 --> 00:01:49,320 Speaker 5: So he marches his guys through these passes. He surrounds 23 00:01:49,320 --> 00:01:52,800 Speaker 5: Belgrade and he's going to retake it for the Serbs, 24 00:01:53,040 --> 00:01:56,000 Speaker 5: and people are pretty excited about this. But he gets 25 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:58,400 Speaker 5: there and he kind of like half ass surrounds it, 26 00:01:58,440 --> 00:02:01,200 Speaker 5: doesn't do like a doesn't fully and doesn't lay siege 27 00:02:01,200 --> 00:02:02,760 Speaker 5: to it. They don't even say it's a siege because 28 00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:05,120 Speaker 5: he didn't do it quite right. And then he's getting mad. 29 00:02:06,600 --> 00:02:08,680 Speaker 5: I know, he's writing all these angry letters to the Russians, 30 00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:09,920 Speaker 5: like where are you guys? I thought you were coming 31 00:02:09,919 --> 00:02:12,440 Speaker 5: here to help me ston circle this And you know, 32 00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:15,320 Speaker 5: as he's marching through, he just very limited like Turk 33 00:02:15,360 --> 00:02:17,720 Speaker 5: resistance on the way to Belgrade, and he's kind of 34 00:02:17,760 --> 00:02:20,480 Speaker 5: expecting that, like, I am going to this is going 35 00:02:20,520 --> 00:02:23,360 Speaker 5: to be my moment. I am the liberator of the Balkans, 36 00:02:23,400 --> 00:02:25,799 Speaker 5: I am expanding the Austro Hungarian Empire. I'm going to 37 00:02:25,840 --> 00:02:27,840 Speaker 5: win a great military victory. And everywhere I go, the 38 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:31,440 Speaker 5: Serbian and Croatian and Bosnian people, Romanians, Moldovans, they will 39 00:02:31,480 --> 00:02:34,160 Speaker 5: be lining the streets with flowers and wine and to 40 00:02:34,200 --> 00:02:37,639 Speaker 5: celebrate the emperor arriving to liberate them from the oppression 41 00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:37,919 Speaker 5: of the. 42 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:42,079 Speaker 3: Turks, rejoice, it is I come to free you from 43 00:02:42,120 --> 00:02:42,560 Speaker 3: your bomb. 44 00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:47,079 Speaker 5: Yes, except all of those people are Orthodox, they're not Catholic, 45 00:02:47,200 --> 00:02:49,760 Speaker 5: they don't want to be Catholic, and they're not that 46 00:02:49,840 --> 00:02:52,440 Speaker 5: excited about the Austro Hungarian army marching in. This guy 47 00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:54,840 Speaker 5: was willing to trade an entire region of his own 48 00:02:54,880 --> 00:02:57,920 Speaker 5: people like he's an enlightened despot, but he's still a despot. 49 00:02:57,960 --> 00:02:59,919 Speaker 5: And to a lot of these people in this region, 50 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,320 Speaker 5: this isn't that much better. I just pay my taxes 51 00:03:02,320 --> 00:03:04,600 Speaker 5: to somebody else. Now, you know, maybe they'll cut my 52 00:03:04,639 --> 00:03:07,400 Speaker 5: hand off, but like, yes, six to one have to 53 00:03:07,520 --> 00:03:13,000 Speaker 5: we're kind of hoping for the Russians actually, or self distermination. 54 00:03:13,120 --> 00:03:16,480 Speaker 2: Right right, It's like how diet soda is still soda 55 00:03:16,880 --> 00:03:19,480 Speaker 2: and some of these people in this town don't want 56 00:03:19,520 --> 00:03:20,959 Speaker 2: the soda this guy is selling. 57 00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:24,720 Speaker 5: Yeah, so he's not getting he was expecting, like, you know, 58 00:03:25,160 --> 00:03:28,360 Speaker 5: flowers and parades and also soldiers to kind of flock. 59 00:03:28,400 --> 00:03:30,400 Speaker 5: Oh it's here now, it's time for the resistance to 60 00:03:30,480 --> 00:03:33,400 Speaker 5: rise up. And that doesn't happen for him, and so 61 00:03:33,639 --> 00:03:38,040 Speaker 5: he doesn't encircle Belgrade. He's stuck there and it's the 62 00:03:38,080 --> 00:03:40,520 Speaker 5: middle of summer and the heat is starting to kill 63 00:03:40,560 --> 00:03:43,520 Speaker 5: people or get heat exhaustion on people. The couple horrible 64 00:03:43,560 --> 00:03:47,840 Speaker 5: diseases hit the like plagues, you know, whatever, malaria or 65 00:03:47,840 --> 00:03:51,680 Speaker 5: whatever's going on in the region. There's illness and disease 66 00:03:51,800 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 5: and heat, and his guys start dying and they haven't 67 00:03:55,240 --> 00:03:57,880 Speaker 5: even begun the siege yet. There's he's got two hundred 68 00:03:57,880 --> 00:04:01,080 Speaker 5: and thirty thousand guys. There's like six thousand defender in Belgrade. 69 00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:04,080 Speaker 5: It's not a lot, right, he outnumbers them massively, but 70 00:04:04,120 --> 00:04:06,560 Speaker 5: he can't surround them or he doesn't surround them, and 71 00:04:07,640 --> 00:04:10,360 Speaker 5: and he's moving slowly, and his guys are either dropping 72 00:04:10,400 --> 00:04:15,120 Speaker 5: dead or getting so incapacity they can't fight, or just leaving, 73 00:04:15,160 --> 00:04:17,800 Speaker 5: being like this this sucks, Like this guy's always doing 74 00:04:18,120 --> 00:04:22,039 Speaker 5: a lot of the soldiers in this army are you know, 75 00:04:22,080 --> 00:04:24,479 Speaker 5: they're they're either conscripts who are forced to be there, 76 00:04:24,760 --> 00:04:26,760 Speaker 5: or they're mercenaries. We are just there to get paid. 77 00:04:26,880 --> 00:04:28,600 Speaker 5: And at some point you're like, this isn't worth it. 78 00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:33,800 Speaker 5: And the other component is there was no background checks 79 00:04:34,040 --> 00:04:36,400 Speaker 5: to enter the Austro Hungarian army, so all these guys 80 00:04:36,440 --> 00:04:40,440 Speaker 5: are like escaped criminals or like fugitives from justice or whatever, 81 00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:42,919 Speaker 5: like just like, oh, whatever, I'll join the army. 82 00:04:43,480 --> 00:04:46,800 Speaker 2: I'm just laughing because like we'll do an episode on 83 00:04:46,920 --> 00:04:48,480 Speaker 2: French Foreign Legion later. 84 00:04:48,560 --> 00:04:49,839 Speaker 5: And it's like that, yeah, exactly. 85 00:04:50,200 --> 00:04:55,240 Speaker 2: But I'm picturing now as just sketch comedy. I'm picturing 86 00:04:56,279 --> 00:05:01,800 Speaker 2: the interview that someone has joining. You're like, Okay, your 87 00:05:02,160 --> 00:05:05,839 Speaker 2: CV is looking pretty solid. Done. See you've done a 88 00:05:05,880 --> 00:05:10,080 Speaker 2: couple of b and ees, a little bit of heresy. Uh, 89 00:05:10,520 --> 00:05:10,840 Speaker 2: just the. 90 00:05:10,839 --> 00:05:13,080 Speaker 5: Slow pan, just like the Austrian army assembled and you 91 00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:15,040 Speaker 5: do the slow pan across them and like some of 92 00:05:15,040 --> 00:05:16,600 Speaker 5: the guys would like smoke, and some of them are 93 00:05:16,600 --> 00:05:18,000 Speaker 5: like sharpening knives, you know. 94 00:05:21,680 --> 00:05:25,960 Speaker 2: But that's that's internal dissension. Right. We already know they're 95 00:05:25,960 --> 00:05:30,560 Speaker 2: not an ideologically unified force other than, as we pointed 96 00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:35,560 Speaker 2: out earlier, common cause against the enemy the Ottoman Empire. 97 00:05:35,920 --> 00:05:39,880 Speaker 5: Yes, and now now things are going badly, right. They 98 00:05:39,880 --> 00:05:43,119 Speaker 5: were expecting one thing and they're getting real war, which 99 00:05:43,320 --> 00:05:46,640 Speaker 5: is not fun and glorious and exciting. It's it's hard. 100 00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:51,719 Speaker 5: And and then well there's they still haven't fully surrounded Belgrade. 101 00:05:52,240 --> 00:05:52,360 Speaker 1: Uh. 102 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:57,080 Speaker 5: They they get news that the Turks have mobilized, and 103 00:05:57,120 --> 00:06:00,120 Speaker 5: they are sending. They're sending an army to come fight them, 104 00:06:00,440 --> 00:06:02,479 Speaker 5: and it's a big one. It's more guys than they 105 00:06:02,480 --> 00:06:04,240 Speaker 5: thought they were going to have. And it's on the way. 106 00:06:05,000 --> 00:06:08,560 Speaker 2: Max, can we get some ominous war on the horizon? Music? 107 00:06:17,000 --> 00:06:21,000 Speaker 5: Perfect? Perfect? So the Turks have crossed the Danube River 108 00:06:21,440 --> 00:06:26,840 Speaker 5: into basically Romania and they are marching for Belgrade. They 109 00:06:26,839 --> 00:06:30,040 Speaker 5: are going to come and fight for the city and 110 00:06:30,080 --> 00:06:31,920 Speaker 5: they're going to come fight the Austro Hungarian Empire. And 111 00:06:31,960 --> 00:06:33,440 Speaker 5: there's a big one and there's a lot of them. 112 00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:37,320 Speaker 5: And on the way you start to see reports coming 113 00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:39,839 Speaker 5: in first from civilians showing up and being like, the 114 00:06:39,839 --> 00:06:42,800 Speaker 5: Turks are coming, and they think, we wanted you guys here, 115 00:06:42,839 --> 00:06:44,440 Speaker 5: and we asked for you guys here. So they're mad 116 00:06:44,480 --> 00:06:47,200 Speaker 5: and they're burning stuff and they're enslaving people, they're carrying 117 00:06:47,200 --> 00:06:50,400 Speaker 5: people off, they're killing people, they're doing bads, they're torturing people, 118 00:06:50,960 --> 00:06:53,480 Speaker 5: they're burning our farms. It's bad. And there's a lot 119 00:06:53,560 --> 00:06:54,960 Speaker 5: of them and they're like, oh, shoot, there's a lot 120 00:06:55,000 --> 00:06:58,040 Speaker 5: of guys. And then you start to get news from 121 00:06:58,160 --> 00:07:01,320 Speaker 5: one of those five armies that Joseph had dispatched. He 122 00:07:01,400 --> 00:07:03,520 Speaker 5: dispatched one to kind of guard his flanks. Some of 123 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:05,760 Speaker 5: those guys start showing up. They're like, yeah, there's there's 124 00:07:05,760 --> 00:07:08,279 Speaker 5: a lot of them, and they kick their ass and 125 00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:12,440 Speaker 5: we're running. And so starts to be worried that the 126 00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:16,400 Speaker 5: Austrian army in the Banat Basin, which is in western Romania, 127 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:21,880 Speaker 5: they're badly defeated. They break and run and they get 128 00:07:21,920 --> 00:07:24,640 Speaker 5: news to Joseph the second that like you've you've lost, 129 00:07:24,840 --> 00:07:27,240 Speaker 5: You've lost this flank, and he's like, okay, we got 130 00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:29,560 Speaker 5: to go. Let's abandon, like you guys stay here at Belgrade. 131 00:07:29,560 --> 00:07:32,000 Speaker 5: I'll take twenty thousand guys. I'll rush out to reinforce 132 00:07:32,200 --> 00:07:34,920 Speaker 5: these retreating troops. Once they see me, they'll all rally, 133 00:07:34,920 --> 00:07:36,920 Speaker 5: of course, and they'll all fight for me, and we'll 134 00:07:36,960 --> 00:07:38,960 Speaker 5: I'll lead them on this great military victory against this 135 00:07:39,000 --> 00:07:44,320 Speaker 5: big army that's coming. Okay, you know, the reports are 136 00:07:44,360 --> 00:07:48,320 Speaker 5: getting around the camp that any Austro Hungarian soldiers, any 137 00:07:48,400 --> 00:07:51,280 Speaker 5: Christian soldiers who aren't willing to renounce their faith, are 138 00:07:51,640 --> 00:07:56,080 Speaker 5: being killed by the Turks in various horrifying ways, like 139 00:07:56,240 --> 00:07:59,480 Speaker 5: Turkish prison is a meme for a reason. In European warfare, 140 00:07:59,520 --> 00:08:02,440 Speaker 5: there's rules. The rules get broken constantly, but they at 141 00:08:02,520 --> 00:08:03,679 Speaker 5: least have them written down. 142 00:08:04,400 --> 00:08:05,760 Speaker 2: There's something on paper. 143 00:08:06,040 --> 00:08:08,120 Speaker 5: Yes, this is illegal what you were doing. You can't 144 00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:10,720 Speaker 5: be doing this to me. Oh ow ow right. 145 00:08:10,800 --> 00:08:12,600 Speaker 2: But there's still you know, I think this is a 146 00:08:12,720 --> 00:08:17,520 Speaker 2: very important point about the xenophobia that's that's inherent to this. 147 00:08:17,720 --> 00:08:21,160 Speaker 2: You know, there's there's now a bunch of people saying, hey, 148 00:08:21,320 --> 00:08:26,000 Speaker 2: our denominations may differ, we may not speak the same language. 149 00:08:26,360 --> 00:08:28,520 Speaker 2: But these foreign hordes. 150 00:08:28,520 --> 00:08:31,560 Speaker 5: Yeah, it's bed. They're riding on horses, they have the 151 00:08:31,600 --> 00:08:35,079 Speaker 5: funny hats, they got the mustaches, doing bad stuff to people, 152 00:08:35,480 --> 00:08:38,319 Speaker 5: you know, and and stuff gets exaggerated, right like maybe, 153 00:08:38,440 --> 00:08:40,959 Speaker 5: I mean likely a lot of this stuff isn't happening, 154 00:08:41,120 --> 00:08:43,240 Speaker 5: or at least isn't that common, but the story gets 155 00:08:43,240 --> 00:08:45,400 Speaker 5: passed around. One guy gets his fingernails pulled out, and 156 00:08:45,440 --> 00:08:47,439 Speaker 5: all of a sudden, everybody's talking about it, you know 157 00:08:47,480 --> 00:08:50,840 Speaker 5: what I mean. So you get these stories and it's 158 00:08:50,840 --> 00:08:53,680 Speaker 5: starting to you know, these guys are here, they're maybe 159 00:08:53,720 --> 00:08:55,520 Speaker 5: starting to be a little shaky, and their confidence of 160 00:08:55,760 --> 00:08:59,080 Speaker 5: just with the second they're an enemy. They're in a 161 00:08:59,160 --> 00:09:02,040 Speaker 5: land that is you know, enemy controlled. But also the 162 00:09:02,080 --> 00:09:04,120 Speaker 5: people here don't really want you there as much as 163 00:09:04,120 --> 00:09:07,160 Speaker 5: you think they did. So Joseph starts to march out 164 00:09:07,280 --> 00:09:09,720 Speaker 5: to fight this army with his twenty thousand guys to 165 00:09:09,760 --> 00:09:13,040 Speaker 5: reinforce this falling position. And he gets word as he's 166 00:09:13,040 --> 00:09:16,600 Speaker 5: marching there that oh wait, there's a second Turkish army 167 00:09:16,760 --> 00:09:26,480 Speaker 5: coming from a different direction and it's swinging around behind you. Okay, crap, retreat, Okay, 168 00:09:26,480 --> 00:09:28,560 Speaker 5: fall back. So they fall back. They abandoned Belga. They 169 00:09:28,600 --> 00:09:31,080 Speaker 5: fall back to the mountain pass that we had talked 170 00:09:31,080 --> 00:09:33,760 Speaker 5: about before, which was the part of the original border. 171 00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:36,559 Speaker 5: So okay, we fall back to the mountains. We are 172 00:09:36,559 --> 00:09:37,959 Speaker 5: going to find this mountain pass. So we're going to 173 00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:39,880 Speaker 5: guard this mountain pass. That's that's what That's what they 174 00:09:39,880 --> 00:09:42,040 Speaker 5: did at Thermopola. That's what we're gonna do. We'll guard 175 00:09:42,120 --> 00:09:50,320 Speaker 5: this pass. So they traveled to Transylvania in Romania, Bookie 176 00:09:51,320 --> 00:09:55,240 Speaker 5: go on ominist ominist location. They're in the They're in 177 00:09:55,280 --> 00:09:59,120 Speaker 5: the Timiserna Gap, which is a mountain pass in southwestern 178 00:09:59,240 --> 00:10:04,120 Speaker 5: Romania and the Transylvanian Alps near a town called karen Sebbi's. 179 00:10:04,800 --> 00:10:08,240 Speaker 5: So this is if they're gonna like the Turks. He's 180 00:10:08,280 --> 00:10:10,280 Speaker 5: given up the flat lands to the Turks. You can't 181 00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,640 Speaker 5: really fight them there anyway, because you at this time 182 00:10:12,679 --> 00:10:15,040 Speaker 5: period we're fighting with rifles and bayonets. You can form 183 00:10:15,080 --> 00:10:17,560 Speaker 5: a square, but it's not like it's not one hundred 184 00:10:17,600 --> 00:10:19,720 Speaker 5: percent when you form a square. The Turks not only 185 00:10:19,760 --> 00:10:23,200 Speaker 5: have amazing cavalry, which is a huge advantage in open ground, 186 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:26,160 Speaker 5: but they have amazing artillery, which is also awesome and 187 00:10:26,200 --> 00:10:28,760 Speaker 5: open ground. So they'll blow your squares up with artillery 188 00:10:28,800 --> 00:10:30,880 Speaker 5: and then ride the horses into the gaps, and you 189 00:10:30,920 --> 00:10:32,640 Speaker 5: can't stand against that. You don't want to fight Turks 190 00:10:32,640 --> 00:10:35,560 Speaker 5: and open ground. You want to fight them on in 191 00:10:35,720 --> 00:10:39,520 Speaker 5: cities or in mountain passes, in fortifications. You can't just 192 00:10:39,600 --> 00:10:41,160 Speaker 5: march out and engage them too. 193 00:10:41,240 --> 00:10:44,320 Speaker 2: You want to like bottleneck, you want to force them 194 00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:49,240 Speaker 2: into a siege attempt. You have to find some sort 195 00:10:49,280 --> 00:10:53,199 Speaker 2: of as you were saying, Ben, some sort of geographic 196 00:10:53,320 --> 00:10:56,679 Speaker 2: barrier to even the odds a little bit, because if 197 00:10:56,679 --> 00:11:01,360 Speaker 2: we're on flat, open ground, you're about to get a standbold. 198 00:11:01,280 --> 00:11:05,120 Speaker 4: Yes, exactly, not constantinople. Nobody's business. 199 00:11:05,120 --> 00:11:05,960 Speaker 2: But we had to do it. 200 00:11:06,160 --> 00:11:10,200 Speaker 3: We had to do it heart time. Finally, finally, a 201 00:11:10,280 --> 00:11:11,679 Speaker 3: moment to drop that. 202 00:11:11,720 --> 00:11:14,680 Speaker 2: Ref I'm so proud of us for holding to. 203 00:11:14,760 --> 00:11:18,280 Speaker 3: That moment, for so exercising restraint. Yes, a little bit. 204 00:11:18,400 --> 00:11:22,400 Speaker 5: Yeah, I was purposely not using the term, not not 205 00:11:22,520 --> 00:11:24,959 Speaker 5: referring to the capital of the Ottoman Empire. 206 00:11:25,200 --> 00:11:26,800 Speaker 2: You knew, you knew, because. 207 00:11:26,520 --> 00:11:28,320 Speaker 5: We had to wait, We had to the pull that out. 208 00:11:28,360 --> 00:11:28,600 Speaker 3: The right. 209 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,080 Speaker 5: So he's fallen back, he's marched out. He hasn't really 210 00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:39,840 Speaker 5: engaged the enemy. There's one side of his enemy, of 211 00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:42,520 Speaker 5: his force has been defeated. He's falling back already to 212 00:11:42,559 --> 00:11:45,600 Speaker 5: the border. And now he's in this mountain pass that 213 00:11:45,600 --> 00:11:51,120 Speaker 5: connects the plane which is in the Romanian area to 214 00:11:51,559 --> 00:11:56,040 Speaker 5: the Hungarian plane, which is his empire. Right now, these 215 00:11:56,040 --> 00:11:58,080 Speaker 5: guys are marching and they're they're burning and destroying things. 216 00:11:58,440 --> 00:12:01,559 Speaker 5: Now he's got he's not in tact any enemy positions. 217 00:12:01,559 --> 00:12:04,199 Speaker 5: He's not liberating Serbia. He's defending his own lands now 218 00:12:04,200 --> 00:12:07,200 Speaker 5: from the Turks who are coming to get revenge on him. Okay, 219 00:12:08,040 --> 00:12:10,080 Speaker 5: there's a lot of them, and we don't know how 220 00:12:10,080 --> 00:12:11,680 Speaker 5: many there are, we don't know where they're coming from, 221 00:12:11,840 --> 00:12:15,640 Speaker 5: but they're out there. Okay, So this brings us all 222 00:12:15,720 --> 00:12:17,760 Speaker 5: of this is to set the stage for the Night 223 00:12:17,840 --> 00:12:22,360 Speaker 5: of September fifteenth, seventeen eighty eight, which, like most things 224 00:12:22,400 --> 00:12:24,640 Speaker 5: in history and in current events. We talked about this 225 00:12:24,880 --> 00:12:26,720 Speaker 5: when I was on to talk about the Kung Fu werewolf. 226 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:28,840 Speaker 5: You guys dealt with this with the Hanging Gardens of Babylon. 227 00:12:29,280 --> 00:12:33,040 Speaker 5: The story here is the events are uncertain and debated. 228 00:12:33,440 --> 00:12:35,480 Speaker 5: We can't agree on things that are happening in the 229 00:12:35,480 --> 00:12:38,959 Speaker 5: world right now as a society, so understanding exactly what 230 00:12:39,000 --> 00:12:41,800 Speaker 5: happened at various time periods of history is tricky. Also, 231 00:12:42,960 --> 00:12:45,679 Speaker 5: the version I will tell is the official version of 232 00:12:45,720 --> 00:12:47,400 Speaker 5: the story of the Battle of Karen Debe'z that has 233 00:12:47,440 --> 00:12:50,040 Speaker 5: been recounted over and over again for the last couple 234 00:12:50,080 --> 00:12:54,280 Speaker 5: of centuries. I feel like that's a safe place to start. Okay, Okay. 235 00:12:54,320 --> 00:12:57,920 Speaker 5: It is late at night, September fifteenth, seventeen eighty eight. 236 00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,760 Speaker 5: The army is camped up. I've got one hundred and 237 00:13:00,840 --> 00:13:04,600 Speaker 5: seventy two thousand men who have assembled. They've had this 238 00:13:04,679 --> 00:13:06,959 Speaker 5: false start with they had to go back. They came out, 239 00:13:07,080 --> 00:13:10,240 Speaker 5: they didn't really meet the enemy, but they're already losing. 240 00:13:10,480 --> 00:13:12,880 Speaker 5: They're not confident in their commanders. They've fallen back to 241 00:13:12,920 --> 00:13:15,560 Speaker 5: this location. They're not really sure what's going on. Joseph 242 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:17,960 Speaker 5: the Second is in camp with them, probably doing his 243 00:13:18,080 --> 00:13:18,960 Speaker 5: Joseph the Second thing. 244 00:13:20,360 --> 00:13:22,199 Speaker 2: Guys, I'm so great. 245 00:13:22,040 --> 00:13:24,840 Speaker 5: I just haven't had a chance to fight these guys yet. 246 00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:26,520 Speaker 3: I'm super genius. 247 00:13:26,679 --> 00:13:30,160 Speaker 2: I've heard you've all heard about despots, but my bros, 248 00:13:30,360 --> 00:13:31,199 Speaker 2: I'm enlightened. 249 00:13:31,320 --> 00:13:35,360 Speaker 4: Yes, I'm a real Can we take a quick moment 250 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:38,320 Speaker 4: a despot? Like it's sort of a dated term. Maybe 251 00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:40,319 Speaker 4: it's not. I guess people refer to certain dictator, but 252 00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,440 Speaker 4: is there a difference from a dictator and a despot. 253 00:13:42,600 --> 00:13:45,880 Speaker 4: Despot usually refers to someone with royal blood, right. 254 00:13:46,320 --> 00:13:48,480 Speaker 5: I don't know. I mean I do think of doctor Doom. 255 00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:50,400 Speaker 5: That was what you said when we brought up despot. 256 00:13:50,400 --> 00:13:52,720 Speaker 5: I always feel like it has this negative connotation, but 257 00:13:53,320 --> 00:13:56,160 Speaker 5: I'm not certain could be one of those things where 258 00:13:56,160 --> 00:13:58,160 Speaker 5: like it just got blown out of proportion over time. 259 00:13:59,120 --> 00:14:03,599 Speaker 2: Yeah, guys were very pro Victor Vaughan Doom on this podcast. 260 00:14:03,679 --> 00:14:06,559 Speaker 2: You know he's got some great ideas about governance. 261 00:14:06,720 --> 00:14:08,840 Speaker 5: Uh No, it's I mean I saw a great thing 262 00:14:08,880 --> 00:14:11,680 Speaker 5: once and somebody was like, in defensive doctor Doom. Fools 263 00:14:11,960 --> 00:14:14,199 Speaker 5: is a gender neutral way to address a room. 264 00:14:19,000 --> 00:14:22,280 Speaker 2: I think a despot. It's maybe it's like a spectrum, right, 265 00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:26,040 Speaker 2: I'm freestyling here. A despot means someone who rules with 266 00:14:26,120 --> 00:14:29,600 Speaker 2: an iron fist. They have absolute power. So a dictator 267 00:14:29,720 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 2: is maybe auditioning to become a despot in that spectrum. 268 00:14:34,800 --> 00:14:37,320 Speaker 5: Was Roman too, like that was like a Roman office, 269 00:14:37,440 --> 00:14:39,320 Speaker 5: and you could like it was the person who dictates 270 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:41,280 Speaker 5: things is like the Latin for that. So I think 271 00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:43,200 Speaker 5: it could be because you have Cincinnatus, you have a 272 00:14:43,240 --> 00:14:44,760 Speaker 5: couple of like Sala, you have a couple of people who 273 00:14:44,760 --> 00:14:47,760 Speaker 5: weren't kings but they were dictators. But maybe a despot, 274 00:14:47,840 --> 00:14:51,840 Speaker 5: like you said, Blood, I'm not sure. He didn't like 275 00:14:52,040 --> 00:14:54,320 Speaker 5: any talk about when he went to Paris and met 276 00:14:55,280 --> 00:14:57,600 Speaker 5: the king and queen there, he was just like, I 277 00:14:57,600 --> 00:15:00,280 Speaker 5: don't like all this French Revolution stuff brewing. Right, this 278 00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:02,120 Speaker 5: is seventeen eighty eight. The best feel is a year 279 00:15:02,200 --> 00:15:03,880 Speaker 5: later he went there and he's like, I don't like 280 00:15:04,000 --> 00:15:05,880 Speaker 5: He's like, the Enlightenment's cool, but I don't like all 281 00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:07,400 Speaker 5: this talk about get rid of the kings. 282 00:15:07,240 --> 00:15:12,080 Speaker 3: That's crazy. Es come on, and you guys are yeah, 283 00:15:12,200 --> 00:15:12,720 Speaker 3: And he was. 284 00:15:13,080 --> 00:15:15,080 Speaker 5: When he came back from that, he was he started 285 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:17,680 Speaker 5: getting extremely repressive with people who were talking about maybe 286 00:15:17,680 --> 00:15:19,960 Speaker 5: doing away with the aristocracy. He kind of could see 287 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:22,040 Speaker 5: the French Revolution coming and was scared of it. 288 00:15:22,320 --> 00:15:23,960 Speaker 3: And so he is. 289 00:15:24,240 --> 00:15:26,560 Speaker 5: He has done some cool things and some very progressive 290 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:29,560 Speaker 5: and forward thinking things. But he also wouldn't hesitate to 291 00:15:30,200 --> 00:15:31,840 Speaker 5: throw you in jail and pull your fingernails off if 292 00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:35,160 Speaker 5: he thought you were going to have a revolution against it. 293 00:15:36,200 --> 00:15:41,160 Speaker 2: You could have different ethnicity, or you could have different 294 00:15:41,280 --> 00:15:45,240 Speaker 2: religious beliefs, so long as at the end of your 295 00:15:45,360 --> 00:15:48,400 Speaker 2: talk or at the end of your sermon in the mosque, 296 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:51,880 Speaker 2: the templar, the church, you say, and that is why 297 00:15:51,920 --> 00:15:52,840 Speaker 2: the king is cool. 298 00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:58,000 Speaker 5: Yes, God save the King. Yeah, yeah, you know, you 299 00:15:58,120 --> 00:16:00,720 Speaker 5: had to think whatever you want. But when he showed 300 00:16:00,800 --> 00:16:02,520 Speaker 5: up and was like, I'm a military genius, you had 301 00:16:02,520 --> 00:16:04,280 Speaker 5: to agree with him. You were gonna be. 302 00:16:04,960 --> 00:16:09,960 Speaker 2: So here we are where things are not looking well right, 303 00:16:10,080 --> 00:16:10,760 Speaker 2: things things. 304 00:16:10,600 --> 00:16:12,880 Speaker 5: Have been so people are So you're at this camp 305 00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:15,280 Speaker 5: and it's nighttime. We've got the campfires up rows after 306 00:16:15,360 --> 00:16:17,520 Speaker 5: rows of tens one hundred and seventy two thousand people. 307 00:16:17,680 --> 00:16:21,240 Speaker 5: That's like two NFL stadiums, right, A lot of people 308 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:24,800 Speaker 5: lined up, equipment, weapons, all in camps. They're all they're 309 00:16:24,840 --> 00:16:29,320 Speaker 5: all intense. They're set up. They're arranged by nationality, because 310 00:16:29,400 --> 00:16:31,200 Speaker 5: you need to understand the orders being given to you 311 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:33,440 Speaker 5: by commanding officers. So like the Italians are together, the 312 00:16:33,440 --> 00:16:35,120 Speaker 5: crow outs the Serbs. You know, they don't want to 313 00:16:35,200 --> 00:16:37,240 Speaker 5: they don't really like each other that much, so they 314 00:16:37,320 --> 00:16:40,560 Speaker 5: kind of stay in their own little groups. You've got 315 00:16:40,560 --> 00:16:45,960 Speaker 5: the artillery, you've got cavalry, you've got infantry. And everyone's nervous, right, 316 00:16:45,960 --> 00:16:47,400 Speaker 5: everyone's on edge because the Turks are out there and 317 00:16:47,440 --> 00:16:48,640 Speaker 5: they're coming, and there's going to be a battle in 318 00:16:48,640 --> 00:16:50,520 Speaker 5: the next couple of days. And these guys, a lot 319 00:16:50,520 --> 00:16:53,160 Speaker 5: of these guys haven't had a battle in this war yet. 320 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:55,240 Speaker 5: They've been waiting for it for years. They've been building 321 00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:57,440 Speaker 5: up to this. They've been marching here. They're sick, they've 322 00:16:57,680 --> 00:16:59,440 Speaker 5: they're they're they're dying. A lot of these guys are 323 00:16:59,440 --> 00:17:02,480 Speaker 5: deserting them. Ral is kind of low. They're nervous, they're hungry, 324 00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:04,639 Speaker 5: a lot of them are sick because these these plagues 325 00:17:04,680 --> 00:17:07,320 Speaker 5: are passing around through the camp. Bad guys are coming. 326 00:17:07,320 --> 00:17:12,000 Speaker 5: We got to be ready, okay. So as militaries do, 327 00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:15,920 Speaker 5: they dispatch a patrol, a night patrol to go out 328 00:17:16,880 --> 00:17:19,880 Speaker 5: to scout out see if you can, you know, see 329 00:17:19,880 --> 00:17:21,560 Speaker 5: where the bad guys are. Right, if you go, make 330 00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:23,720 Speaker 5: a ride around, if you see anything, let us know 331 00:17:23,760 --> 00:17:26,199 Speaker 5: if if the Turks show up, you know, come back 332 00:17:26,240 --> 00:17:28,760 Speaker 5: down the alarm. So they send out this group of 333 00:17:29,160 --> 00:17:33,840 Speaker 5: cavalry men, light cavalry. They're called hussars, but they basically 334 00:17:33,880 --> 00:17:36,639 Speaker 5: they have a light They carry a rifle and a 335 00:17:36,680 --> 00:17:39,000 Speaker 5: light sword. They don't wear armor, and they ride these lights. 336 00:17:39,000 --> 00:17:44,280 Speaker 4: A lightsaber, I'm sorry, a light sword. This is where 337 00:17:44,280 --> 00:17:50,320 Speaker 4: my mind amass, laser swords, plasma rifles. This is my 338 00:17:50,440 --> 00:17:53,639 Speaker 4: travel sword, you know, this is my Yes, lightweight and 339 00:17:54,119 --> 00:17:55,520 Speaker 4: easy to take on the road. 340 00:17:55,760 --> 00:17:59,040 Speaker 5: Yes, okay, So they they're traveling light. They ride out 341 00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:02,000 Speaker 5: to do the patrol and they cross the mountain pass. 342 00:18:02,000 --> 00:18:04,920 Speaker 5: They start riding around looking for bad guys. Uh, And 343 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:07,240 Speaker 5: they see a fire in the distance and they roll 344 00:18:07,320 --> 00:18:10,200 Speaker 5: up to it. And we are in Romania right now, 345 00:18:10,440 --> 00:18:12,679 Speaker 5: and it is a camp of well you'll see them 346 00:18:12,680 --> 00:18:14,560 Speaker 5: referred to as gypsies, but we will refer to them 347 00:18:14,560 --> 00:18:17,240 Speaker 5: as Romani Romani people. They are set up. They have 348 00:18:17,280 --> 00:18:21,200 Speaker 5: this camp and they have wagons and you know, there's 349 00:18:21,240 --> 00:18:26,440 Speaker 5: always this kind of mysterious air around this this particular 350 00:18:26,560 --> 00:18:28,720 Speaker 5: like group of people because they have they have they're 351 00:18:28,760 --> 00:18:31,440 Speaker 5: having this awesome party, right, they have girls and they 352 00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:33,960 Speaker 5: wear bells in that jingle when they dance, and they're 353 00:18:34,000 --> 00:18:36,800 Speaker 5: dancing in the music, and they've got kegs and they've 354 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:40,200 Speaker 5: got wine, and they're having this huge party, like completely 355 00:18:40,359 --> 00:18:42,960 Speaker 5: oblivious to the fact that maybe maybe because there's a 356 00:18:43,000 --> 00:18:44,920 Speaker 5: big army there and they're like, hey, why you guys, 357 00:18:44,920 --> 00:18:48,040 Speaker 5: come buy our stuff. But like they're in what would 358 00:18:48,119 --> 00:18:50,720 Speaker 5: be the battlefield tomorrow, but there's this camp of people 359 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:54,600 Speaker 5: out there and they're having a party, and these Hussars 360 00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:57,359 Speaker 5: roll up to it and they're like, well, this is 361 00:18:57,359 --> 00:18:59,480 Speaker 5: pretty cool. What's going on here? And they're like, oh, hey, 362 00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:02,800 Speaker 5: we're selling booze, we got we have schnops, we have wine, 363 00:19:02,920 --> 00:19:06,080 Speaker 5: we've got you know, music, everything's you know, this is awesome. 364 00:19:06,119 --> 00:19:08,920 Speaker 5: Come join our party and hussar. 365 00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:11,480 Speaker 2: By the way, for everybody playing a log at home, 366 00:19:11,600 --> 00:19:13,800 Speaker 2: that's Hungarian cavalry, right. 367 00:19:13,920 --> 00:19:16,680 Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, this is a light cavalry. So yeah, from 368 00:19:16,720 --> 00:19:25,160 Speaker 5: most Hungarians, these guys are kind of you know, Hussars 369 00:19:25,200 --> 00:19:27,680 Speaker 5: are known for like bravado. They would they would wear 370 00:19:27,680 --> 00:19:30,040 Speaker 5: a lot of stuff on their uniforms, and you know, 371 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:31,960 Speaker 5: they're they're the kind of guys that, like like the 372 00:19:32,000 --> 00:19:34,480 Speaker 5: fighter pilots of this time period, right, they're kind of 373 00:19:34,520 --> 00:19:36,399 Speaker 5: they're the big deal. They walk around like they own 374 00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:38,560 Speaker 5: the place. You know, they're the cool guys. Uh, they 375 00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:41,040 Speaker 5: get all the cool missions. They do this the recon stuff, 376 00:19:41,080 --> 00:19:44,240 Speaker 5: and they get to have the glorious charges on the enemy. 377 00:19:44,440 --> 00:19:46,600 Speaker 5: You know, you the infantry fights the enemy, they shoot 378 00:19:46,600 --> 00:19:48,439 Speaker 5: at them and then we ride around and win the battle. 379 00:19:48,680 --> 00:19:51,520 Speaker 5: That kind of thing, right, it's the mentality of these stars. 380 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:52,840 Speaker 3: Sort of like the surgeons of war. 381 00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:56,199 Speaker 5: Yes, yeah, they're the superstars. They're the the you know, 382 00:19:56,280 --> 00:20:00,520 Speaker 5: the the star player here. And and so they show 383 00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:03,480 Speaker 5: up and they're like hell yeah, buckets of booze and 384 00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:07,960 Speaker 5: girls and music, like yes, we're in. And they have money, 385 00:20:07,960 --> 00:20:09,720 Speaker 5: and so they they start paying. They start buying all 386 00:20:09,720 --> 00:20:12,399 Speaker 5: this stuff, and they're having this party and it gets 387 00:20:12,680 --> 00:20:15,800 Speaker 5: a little rowdy. They start getting a little drunk, having 388 00:20:15,800 --> 00:20:17,399 Speaker 5: a good time. Like I said, a lot of some 389 00:20:17,440 --> 00:20:19,159 Speaker 5: of these guys are some of these guys are like 390 00:20:19,320 --> 00:20:23,520 Speaker 5: lesser nobility, right, some of these guys are wanted criminals. 391 00:20:23,880 --> 00:20:26,800 Speaker 5: So it's a whole mix of things, and so these 392 00:20:26,800 --> 00:20:30,760 Speaker 5: guys start drinking and singing and doing karaoke and all that, 393 00:20:31,080 --> 00:20:38,000 Speaker 5: and uh, eventually back at camp, word is getting back like, hey, 394 00:20:38,000 --> 00:20:42,280 Speaker 5: our scouts haven't returned. Uh that's bad, Like we need 395 00:20:42,320 --> 00:20:44,960 Speaker 5: to go find out where these guys are because maybe 396 00:20:45,000 --> 00:20:47,200 Speaker 5: they were taken by the Turks. Maybe turks got them. 397 00:20:47,359 --> 00:20:49,160 Speaker 5: Let's go, we gotta go. We gotta send out attachment 398 00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:53,320 Speaker 5: to go get these guys. So they put together a 399 00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:56,600 Speaker 5: group of whoever there's you know, various watches like night 400 00:20:56,640 --> 00:20:58,160 Speaker 5: watches kind of thing, and so they take a group 401 00:20:58,200 --> 00:20:59,840 Speaker 5: of infantry that was on patrol that night and they're like, 402 00:20:59,880 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 5: you guys, go do the rounds. Here's where they were 403 00:21:01,760 --> 00:21:04,080 Speaker 5: gonna go. Follow their tracks, see if you can find 404 00:21:04,119 --> 00:21:06,520 Speaker 5: these guys. And if it's Turks, like let us know. 405 00:21:07,040 --> 00:21:10,320 Speaker 5: Quickly starts to where it starts to go around the 406 00:21:10,359 --> 00:21:12,959 Speaker 5: camp that like, these guys haven't returned. Okay, what's happening. 407 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,120 Speaker 5: So the infantry goes out to try to find these guys. 408 00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:18,000 Speaker 5: They're they're also dressed lights so they can run fast 409 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:20,040 Speaker 5: if they need to. There's a chance they're gonna have 410 00:21:20,080 --> 00:21:24,080 Speaker 5: to outrun Turkish cavalry. Back to friendly lines so they 411 00:21:24,280 --> 00:21:28,359 Speaker 5: head out and they see the campfires of the Romani camp, 412 00:21:28,560 --> 00:21:31,480 Speaker 5: and they see the Hussars dancing, and I imagine they're 413 00:21:31,520 --> 00:21:33,359 Speaker 5: like half out of their uniform at this point, like 414 00:21:33,440 --> 00:21:36,560 Speaker 5: waiting stuff, like they're trading like their swords for booze, 415 00:21:36,560 --> 00:21:41,640 Speaker 5: that kind of thing. And the soldier the infantry shows 416 00:21:41,680 --> 00:21:44,880 Speaker 5: up and they see all this, and now the infantry 417 00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:48,000 Speaker 5: is presented with two options. Number one, observe and report 418 00:21:48,640 --> 00:21:51,919 Speaker 5: number two, let's do with this. Let's go investigate this 419 00:21:51,960 --> 00:21:56,960 Speaker 5: party because this looks like fun. So they choose the second, 420 00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,400 Speaker 5: of course. So the infantry goes up and they're like, hey, guys, 421 00:21:59,440 --> 00:22:02,119 Speaker 5: what's going on. And the Hussars are like, get the 422 00:22:02,119 --> 00:22:04,320 Speaker 5: hell out of here. We're having a party. And the 423 00:22:04,320 --> 00:22:06,639 Speaker 5: infantry is like, we got some money, and the Hussars like, 424 00:22:06,640 --> 00:22:08,560 Speaker 5: there's not enough booze for you, guys. There's not enough 425 00:22:08,560 --> 00:22:10,560 Speaker 5: booze and girls and music to go around. This is 426 00:22:10,560 --> 00:22:13,000 Speaker 5: our party. Get out of here, you know, want to 427 00:22:13,880 --> 00:22:15,560 Speaker 5: go back to whatever you do? Tell them we're fine, 428 00:22:15,560 --> 00:22:17,120 Speaker 5: tell them there's no turks, and say okay, get out 429 00:22:17,119 --> 00:22:23,119 Speaker 5: of here. Okay. So the infantry is like, no, I 430 00:22:23,160 --> 00:22:27,120 Speaker 5: don't want to. I want booze and music and dancing 431 00:22:27,320 --> 00:22:31,880 Speaker 5: and party, and the Hussars at some point drunkenly form 432 00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:37,280 Speaker 5: a barricade between themselves and the infantry, Like they fortify 433 00:22:37,600 --> 00:22:40,760 Speaker 5: the booze wagons, like they flip some of the carts 434 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:42,720 Speaker 5: over and they like take cover behind them, and they 435 00:22:42,720 --> 00:22:45,920 Speaker 5: form like a military defensive position around like. 436 00:22:45,920 --> 00:22:48,720 Speaker 2: A frat weekend, like rush weekend gone wrong. 437 00:22:49,119 --> 00:22:50,959 Speaker 5: It totally is right. You throw the couch out there, 438 00:22:50,960 --> 00:22:52,560 Speaker 5: you flip the couch, you get up there, you start 439 00:22:52,560 --> 00:22:56,919 Speaker 5: throwing rocks or whatever, and yeah, and that's it. So 440 00:22:56,960 --> 00:23:01,359 Speaker 5: the Hussars build defensive fortifications around owned the girls and 441 00:23:01,440 --> 00:23:04,240 Speaker 5: booze and music, and they're like, you can't come over here. 442 00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:06,959 Speaker 5: And the soldiers now are getting angry, Like the infantry 443 00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:08,640 Speaker 5: is getting angry because they're like, what are you talking about? 444 00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:12,200 Speaker 5: This this bowl right like and so at some point 445 00:23:12,359 --> 00:23:16,439 Speaker 5: there's more yelling and screaming and arguing, and at some 446 00:23:16,600 --> 00:23:18,680 Speaker 5: point during this it starts to get pretty heated. 447 00:23:18,680 --> 00:23:18,800 Speaker 3: There. 448 00:23:18,800 --> 00:23:20,560 Speaker 5: These guys are screaming and yell each other, grabbing each 449 00:23:20,560 --> 00:23:23,080 Speaker 5: other now and at some point, a shot, a gunshot 450 00:23:23,160 --> 00:23:29,439 Speaker 5: goes off. Yes, so you know, in thinking about this 451 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:31,120 Speaker 5: and I don't know this for sure, But in thinking 452 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:33,640 Speaker 5: about this, my guess would be that it was probably 453 00:23:33,720 --> 00:23:37,560 Speaker 5: some somebody with some rank firing a gun up in 454 00:23:37,600 --> 00:23:40,399 Speaker 5: the air to be like, hey, everybody settled down, like 455 00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:42,560 Speaker 5: we're going to babblah blah blah blah. You know, some sergeant, 456 00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:49,480 Speaker 5: some grizzled guy just being like, here's the together, right, yes, right, Okay, 457 00:23:50,080 --> 00:23:52,080 Speaker 5: So somebody fires a gun up in the air to 458 00:23:52,160 --> 00:23:54,840 Speaker 5: try to get her body's attention. It doesn't work. It 459 00:23:54,920 --> 00:23:57,159 Speaker 5: drives these guys into a frenzy and they start they 460 00:23:57,160 --> 00:23:59,119 Speaker 5: think they're being shot at. They think somebody shot one 461 00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:01,000 Speaker 5: of the other guys in the group, and they start 462 00:24:01,000 --> 00:24:04,080 Speaker 5: fighting for real. They start punching and wrestling and like 463 00:24:04,080 --> 00:24:07,040 Speaker 5: a swords are drawn and like another gun shot goes off, 464 00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:10,960 Speaker 5: and yeah, yeah, it was like these guys were kind 465 00:24:10,960 --> 00:24:13,000 Speaker 5: of worked up to this fever pitch right, like the 466 00:24:13,080 --> 00:24:14,920 Speaker 5: enemy's coming blah blah, and they get this one moment 467 00:24:14,920 --> 00:24:16,880 Speaker 5: where they can relax and then suddenly. 468 00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:18,840 Speaker 3: It's like, oh, shoot, like the war's like ah, and. 469 00:24:18,800 --> 00:24:19,880 Speaker 5: So they start fighting each other. 470 00:24:20,040 --> 00:24:24,560 Speaker 2: Oh my gosh, who knew that a gunshot would uh 471 00:24:24,680 --> 00:24:28,000 Speaker 2: maybe freak out veterans of war. 472 00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:32,840 Speaker 5: Yeah, and so now we have a problem because back 473 00:24:32,880 --> 00:24:35,960 Speaker 5: at the camp, we sent out our cavalry, they didn't return. 474 00:24:36,359 --> 00:24:39,199 Speaker 5: We sent out our infantry, they didn't return. And I 475 00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:41,560 Speaker 5: know what a gunshot sounds like, that was a gunshot. 476 00:24:42,600 --> 00:24:52,439 Speaker 5: We had a problem. Something bad has happened. And so 477 00:24:52,640 --> 00:24:55,200 Speaker 5: they start to wake people up, like get up, get up, like, hey, 478 00:24:55,080 --> 00:24:57,960 Speaker 5: the Turks might be here now right, there's something's going on. 479 00:24:58,480 --> 00:25:02,560 Speaker 5: Everybody wake up, so oh crap, Okay, what's happening. And 480 00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:05,600 Speaker 5: then at some point this game of telephone across these 481 00:25:05,680 --> 00:25:08,520 Speaker 5: hundred and seventy two thousand people, it's like it goes 482 00:25:08,560 --> 00:25:10,040 Speaker 5: from like we don't know what's going on to like 483 00:25:10,080 --> 00:25:11,800 Speaker 5: the Turks, the Turks are here, Like we get up, 484 00:25:11,960 --> 00:25:13,680 Speaker 5: battles coming, like it was gonna be a fight, Like 485 00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:16,600 Speaker 5: we get your stuff together, get fall in, load your weapons, 486 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:24,080 Speaker 5: let's go. Then there is more confusion back at the 487 00:25:24,160 --> 00:25:27,000 Speaker 5: Romani camp. People are fighting and it's starting to get 488 00:25:27,000 --> 00:25:29,240 Speaker 5: out of hand, and some people are starting to leave 489 00:25:29,280 --> 00:25:32,240 Speaker 5: and go back to the camp. And at some point 490 00:25:32,480 --> 00:25:35,320 Speaker 5: in this these guys are like really battling it out now, 491 00:25:35,359 --> 00:25:37,880 Speaker 5: like people are getting hurt in the fight here. And 492 00:25:39,119 --> 00:25:44,320 Speaker 5: at some point the camp guys in the camp start 493 00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:47,720 Speaker 5: seeing guys coming through, coming across the field towards them, 494 00:25:47,840 --> 00:25:49,840 Speaker 5: and they think it's the Turks and they open fire 495 00:25:49,880 --> 00:25:52,560 Speaker 5: on them, and they open fire on them with artillery 496 00:25:52,960 --> 00:25:54,719 Speaker 5: and guns, and like as soon as the first guy 497 00:25:54,760 --> 00:25:58,400 Speaker 5: starts shooting at something moving around in the dark, everybody 498 00:25:58,440 --> 00:25:59,080 Speaker 5: starts shooting it. 499 00:25:59,160 --> 00:26:02,680 Speaker 3: Moving up there, shooting. He's unloading his clip. I want 500 00:26:02,680 --> 00:26:03,280 Speaker 3: to I want to. 501 00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:04,920 Speaker 5: Shoot it shot gun. 502 00:26:04,920 --> 00:26:08,439 Speaker 2: This whole war serious, Well, it's like also, you know, 503 00:26:08,640 --> 00:26:11,159 Speaker 2: you move as a unit, right, if you get that 504 00:26:11,280 --> 00:26:13,840 Speaker 2: first report, then it means you have to do your 505 00:26:13,920 --> 00:26:16,399 Speaker 2: job as well. And this is way before you know 506 00:26:16,880 --> 00:26:17,520 Speaker 2: night vision. 507 00:26:17,920 --> 00:26:20,480 Speaker 5: Yeah, or they're really just shooting at shapes in the 508 00:26:20,560 --> 00:26:23,280 Speaker 5: dark that they don't know what they are. So gunfire 509 00:26:23,320 --> 00:26:25,639 Speaker 5: starts to come in on this battle at the camp, 510 00:26:25,880 --> 00:26:28,400 Speaker 5: and everybody in the camp starts to panic. The Hussars 511 00:26:28,640 --> 00:26:31,639 Speaker 5: drunkenly get on their horses and take off running. But 512 00:26:31,680 --> 00:26:33,320 Speaker 5: where are they gonna un They're gonna run to their 513 00:26:33,400 --> 00:26:36,000 Speaker 5: camp because turns out they think they're under attack by 514 00:26:36,000 --> 00:26:38,239 Speaker 5: the Turks also, so they go running back to their 515 00:26:38,280 --> 00:26:39,960 Speaker 5: camp to report, like the Turks are here. The Turks 516 00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,919 Speaker 5: are here, And so within moments of this firing starting. 517 00:26:43,160 --> 00:26:46,479 Speaker 5: You have a squadron or at least a company of 518 00:26:47,359 --> 00:26:54,200 Speaker 5: guys on horseback wearing funny hats that were inspired by 519 00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:51,919 Speaker 5: the must. 520 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:56,760 Speaker 4: These are the tall boys, right, like the like the 521 00:26:57,320 --> 00:27:00,000 Speaker 4: Guards and the Wizard of Oz kind of right, yeah, yeah, 522 00:27:00,040 --> 00:27:01,320 Speaker 4: picturing here, okay yep. 523 00:27:01,480 --> 00:27:08,200 Speaker 2: And cylindrical fur lined yes, yes, and. 524 00:27:08,000 --> 00:27:09,760 Speaker 5: The Turk is cab where it's just a smaller version 525 00:27:09,760 --> 00:27:12,000 Speaker 5: of that same hat, so it's just a little bit 526 00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:20,320 Speaker 5: shorter but the dark. So the these guys start running. 527 00:27:20,320 --> 00:27:22,119 Speaker 5: The Hussars start running back to the camp with their 528 00:27:22,160 --> 00:27:26,360 Speaker 5: swords out, yelling like the Turks the Turks, and these 529 00:27:26,359 --> 00:27:28,280 Speaker 5: guys think they're the Turks, so they start shooting at them. 530 00:27:28,440 --> 00:27:31,800 Speaker 5: The Hussars make it into the camp and start riding 531 00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:33,280 Speaker 5: around the camp. So a lot of these guys who 532 00:27:33,320 --> 00:27:35,400 Speaker 5: are waking up being like what's going on, they wake 533 00:27:35,480 --> 00:27:39,080 Speaker 5: up to like horses running through their camp and they're like, oh, cramp, 534 00:27:39,160 --> 00:27:41,720 Speaker 5: like the Turks they ambushed us, like our stupid emperor 535 00:27:41,800 --> 00:27:44,080 Speaker 5: couldn't figure it out. Now we're now we're gonna die, 536 00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:47,160 Speaker 5: and everybody's in our camp. They're already here killing everybody, 537 00:27:47,400 --> 00:27:49,240 Speaker 5: and so people come out and they just start shooting 538 00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:52,240 Speaker 5: at whatever they see, which is just movement everywhere in 539 00:27:52,280 --> 00:27:54,000 Speaker 5: the camp. Everybody's coming out and shooting it in the 540 00:27:54,080 --> 00:27:54,800 Speaker 5: dark at each other. 541 00:27:55,600 --> 00:27:59,760 Speaker 2: That Danny DeVito and always sunny. So anyways, I started 542 00:27:59,760 --> 00:28:00,119 Speaker 2: bling a. 543 00:28:00,720 --> 00:28:06,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, that's exactly what this is how you do it navigate. 544 00:28:05,960 --> 00:28:09,639 Speaker 5: The officers in charge, the ones who maybe kind of 545 00:28:09,760 --> 00:28:13,240 Speaker 5: have an idea of what's going on, they're yelling to stop. 546 00:28:13,240 --> 00:28:16,840 Speaker 5: They're yelling halt, halt, halta, which is German first stop 547 00:28:16,840 --> 00:28:20,800 Speaker 5: there is they're Austrians, right, halta alta Austrian army, and 548 00:28:20,800 --> 00:28:23,439 Speaker 5: and the Croatians and the and the Italians and the 549 00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:29,680 Speaker 5: Serbs are hearing a lah a la allah and so 550 00:28:29,720 --> 00:28:32,280 Speaker 5: they're like, oh, they're everywhere, and so they start shooting 551 00:28:32,720 --> 00:28:39,400 Speaker 5: and there's gunfire and the army, the Austrian army defeats 552 00:28:39,440 --> 00:28:42,880 Speaker 5: itself and retreats, so they run away from the camp. 553 00:28:43,000 --> 00:28:48,240 Speaker 2: Everybody's ben I have to possess there. Can you say that? Said? 554 00:28:48,280 --> 00:28:48,760 Speaker 2: It's again? 555 00:28:48,800 --> 00:28:49,680 Speaker 3: Yeah, he's pretty good. 556 00:28:49,760 --> 00:28:55,800 Speaker 5: Yes, the Austrian Army defeats itself and yeah, and the. 557 00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:58,720 Speaker 3: Real cell phone there man, Yeah, yeah. 558 00:28:58,600 --> 00:29:01,200 Speaker 2: Guys, we're kicking asses, right. 559 00:29:01,160 --> 00:29:03,480 Speaker 5: Yeah, we are getting crushed by these guys, so they fight. 560 00:29:03,640 --> 00:29:06,440 Speaker 5: It's a fighting withdrawal. So they're falling back and still 561 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:11,320 Speaker 5: firing into the darkness, right and to the point where 562 00:29:12,000 --> 00:29:14,680 Speaker 5: the artillery is there, right, And you've got these guys 563 00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:17,840 Speaker 5: and artillery at this point is cannons that are and 564 00:29:17,960 --> 00:29:20,720 Speaker 5: wagons full of ammunition that are being pulled by horses, right, 565 00:29:20,760 --> 00:29:22,680 Speaker 5: and they've brought them to the camp. They're in the 566 00:29:22,680 --> 00:29:24,400 Speaker 5: back of the camp. They're in this position where they 567 00:29:24,440 --> 00:29:25,840 Speaker 5: can be brought up to fire if they need to. 568 00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:29,480 Speaker 5: But the guys who run the cannons, they ride on 569 00:29:29,520 --> 00:29:33,280 Speaker 5: these wagons, on these horses. If the enemy's into camp 570 00:29:33,320 --> 00:29:36,080 Speaker 5: with you, you're you're dead meat, right, What are you gonna do? 571 00:29:36,120 --> 00:29:38,160 Speaker 5: Maybe you can fire this gunpoint like at them before 572 00:29:38,160 --> 00:29:40,520 Speaker 5: you get cut down by somebody else. So these guys 573 00:29:40,520 --> 00:29:44,160 Speaker 5: are like, the turks are here, we're toast. Let's get 574 00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:47,120 Speaker 5: out of here. So they cut the reins on the horses, 575 00:29:47,360 --> 00:29:50,080 Speaker 5: get on the horses and ride them off, leaving the 576 00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:53,400 Speaker 5: wagon and the cart of ammunition behind, because you can't 577 00:29:53,440 --> 00:29:56,760 Speaker 5: you're never gonna outrun the turks dragging all that stuff. 578 00:29:57,120 --> 00:29:59,760 Speaker 5: So they they cut the way ride off on the 579 00:29:59,760 --> 00:30:04,040 Speaker 5: horse is and leave the artillery and the ammunition. There's 580 00:30:04,040 --> 00:30:06,280 Speaker 5: a story that the payroll for the army was also 581 00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:09,600 Speaker 5: left behind the battle, just the war chests full of 582 00:30:09,680 --> 00:30:10,440 Speaker 5: their their pay. 583 00:30:10,680 --> 00:30:14,120 Speaker 3: No one was snared, even that the accountants took a lot. 584 00:30:14,400 --> 00:30:18,120 Speaker 5: Yes, yes, there is some speculation that somebody might have 585 00:30:18,160 --> 00:30:20,360 Speaker 5: made off with that and might not have been left 586 00:30:20,360 --> 00:30:22,240 Speaker 5: for the Turks, but it was not found. 587 00:30:23,080 --> 00:30:26,960 Speaker 2: You can't prove a thing. The Statute of Limitations is passed. 588 00:30:27,440 --> 00:30:30,320 Speaker 3: Yes, far far far past, so okay. 589 00:30:30,360 --> 00:30:33,000 Speaker 5: There's also a story that in the confusion, Emperor Joseph 590 00:30:33,080 --> 00:30:35,480 Speaker 5: the Second gets on a horse and tries to rally 591 00:30:35,520 --> 00:30:38,200 Speaker 5: his men, and the horse panics and knocks him off 592 00:30:38,240 --> 00:30:39,240 Speaker 5: and he falls into a creek. 593 00:30:39,640 --> 00:30:42,040 Speaker 2: Oh, not a great look. 594 00:30:42,400 --> 00:30:45,880 Speaker 5: Not a good look. So they fight a retreating battle 595 00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:51,080 Speaker 5: against themselves, and the next day or a couple of 596 00:30:51,120 --> 00:30:56,400 Speaker 5: days later, the Turkish armies arrive. The two Turkish forces arrive, 597 00:30:56,760 --> 00:30:59,160 Speaker 5: and as the story goes, they show up and there's 598 00:30:59,200 --> 00:31:05,360 Speaker 5: just a field of Austrian Hungarian soldiers, cannons, wagons, ammunition. 599 00:31:06,440 --> 00:31:12,040 Speaker 5: Maybe those payroll chests there are somewhere between the numbers 600 00:31:12,120 --> 00:31:15,080 Speaker 5: ranged from five hundred to ten thousand, ten thousand being 601 00:31:15,120 --> 00:31:17,800 Speaker 5: an extremely high number. But that's the number you see 602 00:31:17,840 --> 00:31:23,480 Speaker 5: quoted a lot for this, just dead, missing or wounded 603 00:31:24,440 --> 00:31:26,640 Speaker 5: left on the battlefield. So the Turkish army shows up, 604 00:31:26,840 --> 00:31:28,760 Speaker 5: they have won the Battle of karen Seb's and they 605 00:31:28,760 --> 00:31:29,520 Speaker 5: weren't even there. 606 00:31:29,920 --> 00:31:34,320 Speaker 2: They retroactively want it. 607 00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:37,680 Speaker 5: Just on intimidation, just on reputation alone, just on. 608 00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:42,400 Speaker 2: Street rep That's crazy, Ben, Do we know anything about 609 00:31:42,400 --> 00:31:46,880 Speaker 2: how the Ottoman or Turkish forces reacted when. 610 00:31:46,800 --> 00:31:49,160 Speaker 5: We have one? So the sources on this are a 611 00:31:49,160 --> 00:31:51,320 Speaker 5: little messy, which is why people are like, you know, 612 00:31:52,080 --> 00:31:56,880 Speaker 5: people sometimes have our arguments about the historical historiosity of 613 00:31:56,880 --> 00:32:01,960 Speaker 5: this battle. Right, we know there was an Austrian army 614 00:32:01,960 --> 00:32:04,800 Speaker 5: there at that time. We know that they were in 615 00:32:04,840 --> 00:32:09,640 Speaker 5: an extremely defensible position, knowing that an enemy army was coming, 616 00:32:10,120 --> 00:32:13,760 Speaker 5: and we know that they abandoned it for unknown reasons, 617 00:32:13,840 --> 00:32:17,120 Speaker 5: undisclosed reasons that they left that position and didn't give 618 00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:21,280 Speaker 5: reasons why. There was an article written about it in 619 00:32:21,280 --> 00:32:25,320 Speaker 5: an Austrian newspaper a month after the battle. That gives 620 00:32:25,440 --> 00:32:27,480 Speaker 5: kind of like there was a It gives kind of 621 00:32:27,480 --> 00:32:30,240 Speaker 5: like a there was some confusion and some people died, 622 00:32:30,320 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 5: and some houses got set on fire, and we anyway, 623 00:32:34,240 --> 00:32:36,560 Speaker 5: in the confusion we had, we had to abandon the position. 624 00:32:37,560 --> 00:32:41,600 Speaker 5: And basically the Turkish report on it is this is 625 00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:44,480 Speaker 5: similar where they are like, we're not sure what happened here, 626 00:32:44,520 --> 00:32:46,960 Speaker 5: but there must have been some confusion in the Austrian 627 00:32:47,040 --> 00:32:52,880 Speaker 5: ranks and we took their position. Okay. It is interesting. 628 00:32:52,960 --> 00:32:55,120 Speaker 5: I always think of this when I'm talking about this battle, 629 00:32:55,120 --> 00:32:57,040 Speaker 5: that the Austrian flag at this time is a two 630 00:32:57,080 --> 00:33:03,400 Speaker 5: headed eagle, like there's fighting itself. But I'd also say that, like, 631 00:33:03,600 --> 00:33:06,400 Speaker 5: if this happened to my army, I would try to 632 00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:07,480 Speaker 5: convince people it didn't. 633 00:33:07,760 --> 00:33:12,320 Speaker 2: Also, yeah, you want to you, especially if you're an 634 00:33:12,400 --> 00:33:15,520 Speaker 2: enlightened despot, Yeah you would, and you already run the 635 00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:18,320 Speaker 2: educational institutions. You would want to. 636 00:33:19,080 --> 00:33:21,120 Speaker 5: This is said, look for the military genius thing, right, 637 00:33:21,360 --> 00:33:23,440 Speaker 5: and you're in a society where anybody who says you're 638 00:33:23,440 --> 00:33:25,400 Speaker 5: not a military genius is going to go to jail. 639 00:33:25,480 --> 00:33:29,360 Speaker 2: So you gonna manage the pr keep track of which 640 00:33:29,400 --> 00:33:32,320 Speaker 2: fingernails get to stay in the fingers and yeah, have 641 00:33:32,360 --> 00:33:33,120 Speaker 2: to get ripped out. 642 00:33:33,920 --> 00:33:38,160 Speaker 5: So they retreat, and Joseph immediately after this goes home. 643 00:33:38,760 --> 00:33:43,960 Speaker 5: After this time goes home. He's despondent. He's sick. He 644 00:33:44,000 --> 00:33:46,400 Speaker 5: has some pulmonary issue and he's gonna he dies of 645 00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:48,920 Speaker 5: it within like two years of this battle. He goes 646 00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:50,480 Speaker 5: back and he's in really bad health and he's super 647 00:33:50,480 --> 00:33:52,720 Speaker 5: sad about the way everything went down. Doesn't return to 648 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:56,680 Speaker 5: the battlefield, which also lends some credence to this story. 649 00:33:57,160 --> 00:33:58,880 Speaker 5: The first version we see of this story was written 650 00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:03,240 Speaker 5: forty forty years after the battle. That with all those details, right, 651 00:34:03,520 --> 00:34:05,840 Speaker 5: and there's some being people being like, well, this guy 652 00:34:05,880 --> 00:34:08,120 Speaker 5: just didn't like Joseph. But you know, a lot of 653 00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:11,440 Speaker 5: the without another accounts, without another first hand account of 654 00:34:11,520 --> 00:34:13,840 Speaker 5: what happened here, and a conflicting story, I think we 655 00:34:13,920 --> 00:34:15,880 Speaker 5: have to go with this story. And all of the 656 00:34:15,920 --> 00:34:19,040 Speaker 5: stuff that happens after this kind of fits the mold, right, 657 00:34:19,080 --> 00:34:21,839 Speaker 5: Why would they give up this position without without a fight. 658 00:34:22,680 --> 00:34:25,560 Speaker 5: And then Joseph immediately goes home and is sad and 659 00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:27,120 Speaker 5: he's sick. Maybe he did fall in a creak and 660 00:34:27,120 --> 00:34:32,600 Speaker 5: got pneumonia or something, but uh, yeah, so he goes home. 661 00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:36,600 Speaker 5: He dies in seventeen ninety and uh and that's kind 662 00:34:36,640 --> 00:34:38,560 Speaker 5: of the battle of Karen Sebb's. 663 00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:43,200 Speaker 2: The war continues, guy, I feel no let's pause though, 664 00:34:43,239 --> 00:34:46,000 Speaker 2: because now I feel bad for making fun of them, 665 00:34:46,360 --> 00:34:48,080 Speaker 2: Like we dunked on him pretty hard. 666 00:34:48,400 --> 00:34:54,839 Speaker 5: Yeah, I mean it kind of kind of. I mean, 667 00:34:54,920 --> 00:34:56,520 Speaker 5: he does die a couple of years later, but he 668 00:34:56,560 --> 00:34:59,960 Speaker 5: was old. Remember super That's Super Bowl. Oh my god, 669 00:35:02,080 --> 00:35:05,239 Speaker 5: that's a good life right for that time. 670 00:35:09,280 --> 00:35:09,480 Speaker 2: Yeah. 671 00:35:09,520 --> 00:35:14,839 Speaker 5: The war continues. The Austrians regroup without Joseph running the army. 672 00:35:15,200 --> 00:35:17,840 Speaker 5: The armies under the command of a guy named Prince 673 00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:22,279 Speaker 5: Josiahs of Saxe Coburg. He's really effective. He teams up 674 00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:24,880 Speaker 5: with the Russian general Alexander Suvarov, who's like one of 675 00:35:24,920 --> 00:35:29,040 Speaker 5: the greatest war heroes in military geniuses of all time. 676 00:35:29,760 --> 00:35:35,160 Speaker 5: They defeat the Turks, They drive them out of Serbia 677 00:35:35,200 --> 00:35:38,520 Speaker 5: and Croatia and the Balkans in Romania. They sign a 678 00:35:38,560 --> 00:35:41,439 Speaker 5: peace treaty that gives the Russians a bunch of lands 679 00:35:41,440 --> 00:35:45,040 Speaker 5: from the Turks in exchange for Austria Hungary giving back 680 00:35:45,760 --> 00:35:49,160 Speaker 5: Serbia and Croatia and Romania and the Balkans and all that. 681 00:35:49,239 --> 00:35:51,160 Speaker 5: So the end of the war. The treaty signed that 682 00:35:51,239 --> 00:35:54,680 Speaker 5: ends this war in seventeen ninety one, Austria Hungary. Austria 683 00:35:54,760 --> 00:36:00,360 Speaker 5: Hungary gains no additional territory. Serbia is liberated for about 684 00:36:00,560 --> 00:36:04,120 Speaker 5: a year and then returned to the Tarts and were 685 00:36:04,160 --> 00:36:05,160 Speaker 5: really mad about it. 686 00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:10,120 Speaker 2: Hey, can I share? Can I share with all of us? 687 00:36:10,760 --> 00:36:16,520 Speaker 2: The epitaph on Joseph the Second's grave by all means 688 00:36:16,880 --> 00:36:22,240 Speaker 2: it's it's uh, it's not. I don't know. We knowing 689 00:36:22,320 --> 00:36:25,239 Speaker 2: all that we know now over these past few episodes, 690 00:36:25,640 --> 00:36:28,000 Speaker 2: I'd love to hear what we think about this. He's 691 00:36:28,040 --> 00:36:31,640 Speaker 2: buried in the Imperial Crypt in Vienna, and his epitaph, 692 00:36:31,680 --> 00:36:35,439 Speaker 2: at least his request was here lies a ruler who, 693 00:36:35,600 --> 00:36:43,680 Speaker 2: despite his best intentions, was unsuccessful in all of his endeavors, and. 694 00:36:43,760 --> 00:36:46,960 Speaker 4: He wrote that he will okay, well, then wait a minute, 695 00:36:47,160 --> 00:36:49,040 Speaker 4: let's reassess here for a second. 696 00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:51,480 Speaker 3: That means he had a little bit of humility and 697 00:36:51,520 --> 00:36:52,720 Speaker 3: self awareness. 698 00:36:53,040 --> 00:36:54,160 Speaker 2: He took an inventory. 699 00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:58,160 Speaker 5: I think it would seem so I feel like stumbling. 700 00:36:58,400 --> 00:37:02,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, well I sure would be so. 701 00:37:02,400 --> 00:37:06,239 Speaker 2: I guess the big takeaway here, Ben is that we 702 00:37:06,280 --> 00:37:08,600 Speaker 2: should invade parts of Europe. 703 00:37:08,719 --> 00:37:11,759 Speaker 5: Right land war in Europe? Yeah yeah, it's usually goes 704 00:37:11,800 --> 00:37:17,719 Speaker 5: well for people. Let's do in Europe? What can go wrong? 705 00:37:18,320 --> 00:37:19,239 Speaker 2: What could go wrong? 706 00:37:19,320 --> 00:37:21,400 Speaker 3: So much? Did you not listen to the episode. 707 00:37:22,520 --> 00:37:24,680 Speaker 5: I think the world here and I think the moral 708 00:37:24,760 --> 00:37:30,440 Speaker 5: here is is uh, the importance of communication, communication between 709 00:37:31,200 --> 00:37:37,680 Speaker 5: different working forces, leadership, communication and people skills, people skills, Yes, 710 00:37:37,800 --> 00:37:41,880 Speaker 5: and maybe leave things to maybe leave like important jobs 711 00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:44,360 Speaker 5: to people who know how to do them. 712 00:37:44,680 --> 00:37:51,240 Speaker 4: Yeah, I wonder some advice that might apply to some Okay, 713 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:52,360 Speaker 4: I'm sorry, go ahead. 714 00:37:52,520 --> 00:37:54,879 Speaker 2: Here's a horse in the hospital, as our pal John 715 00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:58,520 Speaker 2: mulaney said, And how amazing would it be to hear 716 00:37:58,600 --> 00:38:04,120 Speaker 2: the accounts of the horses involved in these shenanigans in 717 00:38:04,200 --> 00:38:07,200 Speaker 2: this crazy friendly fire incident. 718 00:38:07,480 --> 00:38:09,280 Speaker 4: I think we have a Disney movie in the making, 719 00:38:09,400 --> 00:38:13,399 Speaker 4: the very least Pixar. Yeah, yeah, okay, maybe who should 720 00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:16,080 Speaker 4: we pitch first? I think John mulaney should be the 721 00:38:16,120 --> 00:38:17,160 Speaker 4: voice of the lead horse. 722 00:38:17,640 --> 00:38:18,719 Speaker 2: Yeah, he's got it in him. 723 00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:21,239 Speaker 4: He doesn't do enough animated voices. I think he's got 724 00:38:21,239 --> 00:38:22,040 Speaker 4: a great voice. 725 00:38:22,160 --> 00:38:24,719 Speaker 2: Ben, you should do some animated voices as well. Can 726 00:38:24,760 --> 00:38:27,440 Speaker 2: we just volunteer you for that until you after the fact. 727 00:38:28,080 --> 00:38:30,080 Speaker 5: Yeah, sure, I'll I'll voice. 728 00:38:30,080 --> 00:38:34,680 Speaker 3: It's already happened. You heard it here first, folks. Ben 729 00:38:34,719 --> 00:38:37,320 Speaker 3: will be the voice of the of the Plucky Dog. 730 00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:42,680 Speaker 4: The animated adaptation of Homeward bound excellent, I can do that. 731 00:38:43,280 --> 00:38:45,640 Speaker 2: Yeah, just bote up on the Turkish of the time, 732 00:38:46,200 --> 00:38:49,960 Speaker 2: bonus points for Hungarian and and honestly thank you. 733 00:38:50,040 --> 00:38:51,000 Speaker 3: Start right. 734 00:38:51,080 --> 00:38:51,720 Speaker 5: It doesn't look. 735 00:38:54,120 --> 00:38:55,239 Speaker 3: Surely not difficult. 736 00:38:55,280 --> 00:38:57,840 Speaker 5: It didn't take me. It didn't take me twelve minutes 737 00:38:57,840 --> 00:38:59,920 Speaker 5: of practicing to pronounce Karen Stebbies correctly. 738 00:39:01,120 --> 00:39:02,839 Speaker 2: All right, I think you got it. 739 00:39:02,760 --> 00:39:04,160 Speaker 5: And I don't think I did because I think it's 740 00:39:04,200 --> 00:39:05,960 Speaker 5: a it's a it's like a Karen Stebbish. I think 741 00:39:05,960 --> 00:39:08,799 Speaker 5: it's like a stage at the end. So all right, 742 00:39:08,840 --> 00:39:11,160 Speaker 5: well is not good. 743 00:39:12,920 --> 00:39:15,719 Speaker 2: You say that now, but we've got the whole weekend, man, 744 00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:18,040 Speaker 2: So Ben. 745 00:39:18,360 --> 00:39:20,040 Speaker 5: Something to do with my forty fifth year of life 746 00:39:20,120 --> 00:39:22,040 Speaker 5: is to learn that that's Romanian. 747 00:39:23,080 --> 00:39:26,520 Speaker 2: There we go. Happy birthday to you, Uh, to you, 748 00:39:26,680 --> 00:39:31,799 Speaker 2: Ben Thompson, uh, the creator of bad Ass of the Week. Man. 749 00:39:31,960 --> 00:39:34,960 Speaker 2: I we didn't know that you were recording with us 750 00:39:35,080 --> 00:39:38,919 Speaker 2: on your birthday, Noel, I would have asked to reschedule. 751 00:39:39,400 --> 00:39:41,279 Speaker 5: It's the only work. We gotta get it done. 752 00:39:42,160 --> 00:39:43,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, we would have brought something. 753 00:39:43,840 --> 00:39:46,880 Speaker 4: Well, not only is it your birthday, it's the one 754 00:39:47,000 --> 00:39:51,400 Speaker 4: hundredth birthday of Badass of the Week, the podcast. 755 00:39:51,480 --> 00:39:53,839 Speaker 5: Yeah, that's true. That's true. This will be because I'm 756 00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:55,440 Speaker 5: gonna run this on my feet. This will be episode 757 00:39:55,440 --> 00:39:58,840 Speaker 5: one two for me, So that is exciting stuff. 758 00:39:59,040 --> 00:40:01,319 Speaker 4: Here's too Well, while I'm bond, we didn't make the 759 00:40:01,360 --> 00:40:03,960 Speaker 4: cut for one oh one, one o two is a 760 00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:05,680 Speaker 4: plenty good consolation. 761 00:40:05,320 --> 00:40:05,759 Speaker 3: Mm hmm. 762 00:40:05,880 --> 00:40:09,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, And we will also have this as a two 763 00:40:09,160 --> 00:40:12,840 Speaker 2: part series over on Ridiculous History. Folks, if you like 764 00:40:13,080 --> 00:40:17,080 Speaker 2: our show, you are going to love our brother Ben's show. 765 00:40:17,680 --> 00:40:22,080 Speaker 2: Do check out Badass of the Week spoiler light spoilers. 766 00:40:22,560 --> 00:40:25,960 Speaker 2: You can find Ben Noel and Ben hanging out in 767 00:40:26,160 --> 00:40:30,320 Speaker 2: past episodes as well, so dig through the catalog, check 768 00:40:30,400 --> 00:40:33,920 Speaker 2: out the archives. Ben. Where can people learn more about 769 00:40:33,960 --> 00:40:34,759 Speaker 2: your work. 770 00:40:35,080 --> 00:40:37,280 Speaker 5: Well, we can go to the website Badass of Theweek 771 00:40:37,280 --> 00:40:39,600 Speaker 5: dot com. And you know, Badass of the Week is 772 00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,879 Speaker 5: the name of the podcast. We update every week on Tuesdays, 773 00:40:43,080 --> 00:40:46,359 Speaker 5: usually with a great badass from history. This week we 774 00:40:46,360 --> 00:40:48,080 Speaker 5: were trying to be a little bit have a little 775 00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:50,640 Speaker 5: bit more fun with it for there. 776 00:40:51,440 --> 00:40:53,400 Speaker 3: The character is the war you know. 777 00:40:54,160 --> 00:40:58,080 Speaker 2: Yeah, My favorite character is the horse who said no way, 778 00:40:58,120 --> 00:41:00,000 Speaker 2: I'm getting out of here, you know what I mean. 779 00:41:00,440 --> 00:41:04,719 Speaker 5: The horse was the one who was like, yeah, the 780 00:41:04,719 --> 00:41:07,040 Speaker 5: horses wing to fire the gun and started the confusion. 781 00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:10,000 Speaker 4: I think John mulaney would play the more timid horse, 782 00:41:10,320 --> 00:41:13,960 Speaker 4: and then maybe we could have Eric Bautista come in 783 00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:16,880 Speaker 4: and play one of the more aggressive kind of war horses. 784 00:41:17,000 --> 00:41:18,000 Speaker 3: Who else we got. 785 00:41:17,840 --> 00:41:21,560 Speaker 2: Bill Burr Gilbert It would be a perfect horse with 786 00:41:21,640 --> 00:41:25,800 Speaker 2: an attitude. John mullaney as a horse is more observational humor, 787 00:41:26,200 --> 00:41:26,920 Speaker 2: like that's. 788 00:41:26,760 --> 00:41:29,520 Speaker 3: The protagonist, the John Mulleney horse. 789 00:41:29,719 --> 00:41:32,839 Speaker 2: Guys, I don't know if these are Turks or Hussars. 790 00:41:35,080 --> 00:41:37,000 Speaker 5: I mean maybe we could make an argument here, you know, 791 00:41:37,080 --> 00:41:38,600 Speaker 5: like you said, like you know, we've kind of been 792 00:41:38,760 --> 00:41:42,120 Speaker 5: been dunking on just with the second, but reading that epitaph, 793 00:41:42,280 --> 00:41:46,120 Speaker 5: like there is something about like learning from your mistakes. 794 00:41:46,239 --> 00:41:48,759 Speaker 5: There is something about us, about being able to recognize that, 795 00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:51,480 Speaker 5: like having laws in place that like you can't criticize 796 00:41:51,480 --> 00:41:53,600 Speaker 5: me only two at the end of your life realize 797 00:41:54,000 --> 00:41:56,919 Speaker 5: actually there's some value in what these people were saying. 798 00:41:56,920 --> 00:41:58,560 Speaker 5: And I should have listened, you know, having some kind 799 00:41:58,560 --> 00:42:01,200 Speaker 5: of self realization in that way kind of kind of cool. 800 00:42:01,640 --> 00:42:04,759 Speaker 3: I agree, So points for humility on your death, Ben, Yes, 801 00:42:05,719 --> 00:42:06,440 Speaker 3: betterly than ever. 802 00:42:07,239 --> 00:42:11,160 Speaker 2: And that is part two. Nol I fear I may 803 00:42:11,200 --> 00:42:14,879 Speaker 2: have gone a little bit overboard. You know, I love birthdays, man, 804 00:42:14,960 --> 00:42:18,120 Speaker 2: They're like the only real New Year's there's there. They're 805 00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:23,279 Speaker 2: the perfect holiday and gosh, starret it. Ben Thompson took 806 00:42:23,320 --> 00:42:26,799 Speaker 2: time from his own birthday to explore this story with us. 807 00:42:27,239 --> 00:42:31,080 Speaker 3: What a guy. Thanks the Bens, and thanks to the Knowles. 808 00:42:31,120 --> 00:42:34,960 Speaker 2: Thanks to, of course, our super producer Max Williams and 809 00:42:35,200 --> 00:42:40,440 Speaker 2: his biological brother, our composer Alex Williams. Who else, who else? 810 00:42:40,440 --> 00:42:40,879 Speaker 2: Who else? 811 00:42:40,960 --> 00:42:42,280 Speaker 3: Oh? You know who else? 812 00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:46,160 Speaker 4: Ben, Christopher asiotas you, Jeff Coats here in Spirit, Jonathan Strickland, 813 00:42:46,160 --> 00:42:49,160 Speaker 4: the quiz ser Aj Bahamas, Jacob's the Puzzler. 814 00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:53,239 Speaker 2: Yeah, Rachel Big Spinach, Lance the rude Dude's a ridiculous 815 00:42:53,239 --> 00:42:55,800 Speaker 2: crime and oh, I forgot to say it. I owe 816 00:42:55,880 --> 00:42:59,520 Speaker 2: Aj Bahamas and emails. So we're gonna follow up with that. 817 00:42:59,760 --> 00:43:02,239 Speaker 2: In the meantime, Noel, I think we came up with 818 00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:07,400 Speaker 2: some really good voice casting for our animated version of 819 00:43:07,440 --> 00:43:11,040 Speaker 2: this friendly fire incident. You and I have to figure out. 820 00:43:10,880 --> 00:43:12,520 Speaker 3: Which characters we will play. 821 00:43:12,880 --> 00:43:15,680 Speaker 4: Oh man, I gotta be the bag man, even an 822 00:43:15,719 --> 00:43:16,480 Speaker 4: animal form. 823 00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:17,680 Speaker 3: We'll see the next time. 824 00:43:17,719 --> 00:43:27,919 Speaker 4: Fox For more podcasts from iHeartRadio, visit the iHeartRadio app, 825 00:43:27,960 --> 00:43:31,080 Speaker 4: Apple podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.