1
00:00:00,080 --> 00:00:09,120
Speaker 1: I saw the video of you talking about Sissa's vocals.

2
00:00:05,920 --> 00:00:07,720
Speaker 2: Still bring it brought you to tears.

3
00:00:08,000 --> 00:00:11,920
Speaker 3: Yeah, she's created a new thing and it's inspiring for

4
00:00:12,080 --> 00:00:15,320
Speaker 3: me when I hear her voice, which when I imagine

5
00:00:15,360 --> 00:00:19,360
Speaker 3: it really even Yeah, when I think about it, I

6
00:00:19,560 --> 00:00:22,560
Speaker 3: hear it in my head and it's like very powerful

7
00:00:22,600 --> 00:00:28,800
Speaker 3: for me. So I just am very uh thankful for

8
00:00:29,120 --> 00:00:33,440
Speaker 3: what she's given to my projects in the past and now,

9
00:00:33,479 --> 00:00:33,879
Speaker 3: and like.

10
00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:37,559
Speaker 2: She gets it. Have you said that to her?

11
00:00:37,640 --> 00:00:42,319
Speaker 3: I texted her a few times recently, but I mean,

12
00:00:42,400 --> 00:00:44,080
Speaker 3: I want to tell her this more often. I just

13
00:00:44,080 --> 00:00:44,960
Speaker 3: don't want to be weird.

14
00:00:52,040 --> 00:00:55,600
Speaker 1: This episode of ral podcast is powered by boost Mobile.

15
00:00:55,920 --> 00:01:00,120
Speaker 1: She is one of the most unpredictable genre bendon conversation

16
00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:04,080
Speaker 1: sparking artists of our time. From viral beginnings on the

17
00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:07,080
Speaker 1: Internet to Grammy winds and worldwide tour, She's proven that

18
00:01:07,160 --> 00:01:08,560
Speaker 1: she cannot be boxed in.

19
00:01:08,680 --> 00:01:09,280
Speaker 2: She will not.

20
00:01:09,560 --> 00:01:13,080
Speaker 1: She is a rapper, singer, songwriter, performer artist. She is

21
00:01:13,120 --> 00:01:15,680
Speaker 1: built a career by breaking rules and creating her own

22
00:01:15,760 --> 00:01:18,640
Speaker 1: lane and has a new amazing album that is such

23
00:01:18,640 --> 00:01:19,679
Speaker 1: a vibe called The.

24
00:01:20,240 --> 00:01:21,639
Speaker 2: Please Welcome, Don't You Can.

25
00:01:24,800 --> 00:01:29,080
Speaker 3: Hi? Hi Welcome to in real Life, Thank you for

26
00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:29,800
Speaker 3: having me now.

27
00:01:29,800 --> 00:01:32,000
Speaker 2: I'm so happy to have you. What season are we

28
00:01:32,080 --> 00:01:34,680
Speaker 2: in right now? Because I'm trying to feel the vibes

29
00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:37,520
Speaker 2: where you're at. If I go off the album, I

30
00:01:37,680 --> 00:01:40,520
Speaker 2: feel that you're having fun. You may or may not

31
00:01:40,560 --> 00:01:44,480
Speaker 2: be in love you are. This is just what album

32
00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:48,680
Speaker 2: vibes is giving. I don't know, just free for you?

33
00:01:48,720 --> 00:01:50,760
Speaker 3: Tell me romance season?

34
00:01:51,200 --> 00:01:51,920
Speaker 2: Is it romance?

35
00:01:52,080 --> 00:01:55,360
Speaker 3: Yes? Like it feels like I don't know. I think

36
00:01:55,400 --> 00:02:01,520
Speaker 3: I've just always been a romantic and I just I

37
00:02:01,560 --> 00:02:04,040
Speaker 3: love to write about it, and so it just ended

38
00:02:04,120 --> 00:02:06,360
Speaker 3: up being the entirety of this project.

39
00:02:06,440 --> 00:02:09,280
Speaker 2: Okay, so v is the name of the album, which

40
00:02:09,320 --> 00:02:10,440
Speaker 2: is Life.

41
00:02:10,160 --> 00:02:14,120
Speaker 3: Yes, which is French.

42
00:02:15,080 --> 00:02:18,720
Speaker 2: Inspired by just have you spend time in friends recently?

43
00:02:18,840 --> 00:02:21,240
Speaker 3: Or just there's something about wm. I mean I've had

44
00:02:21,240 --> 00:02:26,560
Speaker 3: French ex boyfriends, but I think that also like French

45
00:02:26,639 --> 00:02:31,320
Speaker 3: culture kind of like in the last I mean forever,

46
00:02:31,400 --> 00:02:34,880
Speaker 3: it's always been very there's something very romantic about that

47
00:02:35,160 --> 00:02:37,639
Speaker 3: and very sexy. And I think like when you think

48
00:02:37,680 --> 00:02:40,920
Speaker 3: of like a kissing, you think of French kissing, you know,

49
00:02:41,000 --> 00:02:43,920
Speaker 3: and like it's just I don't know, there was something

50
00:02:44,000 --> 00:02:46,959
Speaker 3: there for me that I feel like connected with the

51
00:02:47,000 --> 00:02:52,600
Speaker 3: emotions and the and the feeling of the album. Maybe

52
00:02:52,639 --> 00:02:56,280
Speaker 3: a little bit with the visuals, of course, but I

53
00:02:56,280 --> 00:02:59,040
Speaker 3: think I wanted the eighties to really be the main

54
00:02:59,160 --> 00:03:02,320
Speaker 3: foundation and then sort of lay on some sprinkles of

55
00:03:03,280 --> 00:03:06,120
Speaker 3: French romanticism.

56
00:03:06,440 --> 00:03:08,600
Speaker 1: When you make an album like this and you're in

57
00:03:08,639 --> 00:03:11,040
Speaker 1: your head and you're having the French fantasy and the

58
00:03:11,760 --> 00:03:14,079
Speaker 1: romanticizing all of it, and then you put it out

59
00:03:14,120 --> 00:03:15,080
Speaker 1: for the world.

60
00:03:15,440 --> 00:03:21,400
Speaker 4: You're like, here's my baby, yeah, and then people look

61
00:03:21,480 --> 00:03:25,040
Speaker 4: at it, criticize it, analyze it.

62
00:03:25,600 --> 00:03:29,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, what does da feel like? Well, okay, so going

63
00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:31,480
Speaker 3: off of you saying that, like, it's kind of like

64
00:03:31,520 --> 00:03:34,160
Speaker 3: having a baby. It's like you have a baby and

65
00:03:34,240 --> 00:03:38,560
Speaker 3: you like want to and you love it so much,

66
00:03:38,640 --> 00:03:40,920
Speaker 3: but you also want to share it with your family,

67
00:03:41,400 --> 00:03:43,120
Speaker 3: or you want to share it with your friends. You

68
00:03:43,160 --> 00:03:48,160
Speaker 3: want them to all love this baby with you. And

69
00:03:48,600 --> 00:03:53,520
Speaker 3: sometimes it's like maybe like when I look at things

70
00:03:53,560 --> 00:03:56,160
Speaker 3: on the internet of like people doing reviews a bit,

71
00:03:56,200 --> 00:03:59,640
Speaker 3: I get a lot of like, that's a really cute baby,

72
00:04:00,280 --> 00:04:03,800
Speaker 3: and then I get some people who are like I

73
00:04:03,840 --> 00:04:06,880
Speaker 3: don't know, I just like don't really I don't really

74
00:04:06,920 --> 00:04:11,960
Speaker 3: like kids, or or like it's like drooling too much,

75
00:04:12,360 --> 00:04:15,360
Speaker 3: or like I don't think it's it has like a

76
00:04:15,360 --> 00:04:20,200
Speaker 3: weird old hair. It looks like an old man. Yeah, yeah,

77
00:04:20,360 --> 00:04:22,640
Speaker 3: it doesn't have enough hair, Yeah, exactly.

78
00:04:22,839 --> 00:04:25,520
Speaker 1: So that there's that would send me if I put

79
00:04:25,560 --> 00:04:27,640
Speaker 1: my baby on the internet and they said my baby

80
00:04:27,800 --> 00:04:30,080
Speaker 1: was like a old man, that would send me into

81
00:04:30,120 --> 00:04:31,640
Speaker 1: an immediate rage.

82
00:04:32,160 --> 00:04:32,920
Speaker 3: Maybe yeah.

83
00:04:32,960 --> 00:04:33,239
Speaker 2: Sure.

84
00:04:33,320 --> 00:04:37,000
Speaker 3: I think also though, which is your feelings are always valid.

85
00:04:37,080 --> 00:04:39,599
Speaker 3: But at the at the same time, when you look

86
00:04:39,640 --> 00:04:42,520
Speaker 3: at your baby, you know that you love it so

87
00:04:42,800 --> 00:04:46,560
Speaker 3: much unconditionally and that there's nothing that could take you

88
00:04:46,640 --> 00:04:49,080
Speaker 3: away from that, and that you feel you feel so

89
00:04:49,240 --> 00:04:54,080
Speaker 3: confident in loving of your child, And that's that's motherhood.

90
00:04:55,880 --> 00:05:00,760
Speaker 2: You're gonna be a great mind. Oh god, that's and.

91
00:05:01,160 --> 00:05:03,679
Speaker 3: I mean to switch it up and be quite literal

92
00:05:03,720 --> 00:05:08,360
Speaker 3: and just get to the point like that's that's that's artistry.

93
00:05:08,360 --> 00:05:10,640
Speaker 3: If you're an artist. Yes, you can doubt your work

94
00:05:10,720 --> 00:05:13,680
Speaker 3: sometimes maybe you'll be scared something can happen to I'll

95
00:05:13,720 --> 00:05:15,800
Speaker 3: go back to the metaphor, but something will happen to

96
00:05:15,839 --> 00:05:19,200
Speaker 3: your baby, like maybe it'll turn out to have, you know,

97
00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:24,839
Speaker 3: like cognitive issues or something, but like you still love

98
00:05:25,240 --> 00:05:29,599
Speaker 3: your child, and I still love my work no matter what,

99
00:05:29,760 --> 00:05:32,920
Speaker 3: because I know that I love it. Maybe there's been

100
00:05:32,960 --> 00:05:35,120
Speaker 3: times where I've made something and I've been like I

101
00:05:35,200 --> 00:05:37,440
Speaker 3: wish I could like fix this here and this that

102
00:05:37,520 --> 00:05:41,320
Speaker 3: and whatever. But I look back at everything and I'm like,

103
00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:45,880
Speaker 3: I love what I've done, and I love what I'm doing,

104
00:05:46,279 --> 00:05:49,560
Speaker 3: and I love this album. I really do.

105
00:05:49,680 --> 00:05:50,720
Speaker 2: That's so great. We asked this.

106
00:05:51,320 --> 00:05:53,359
Speaker 1: We usually started and I got distracted because we were

107
00:05:53,360 --> 00:05:54,800
Speaker 1: talking about the album, but we usually.

108
00:05:54,640 --> 00:05:58,000
Speaker 2: Start in real life, in real life, how happy are

109
00:05:58,040 --> 00:06:00,720
Speaker 2: you in your life right now? Let's get once it's up.

110
00:06:01,320 --> 00:06:01,880
Speaker 2: What's a day?

111
00:06:02,520 --> 00:06:08,320
Speaker 3: Man? It comes and goes. I think I'm all right.

112
00:06:08,920 --> 00:06:16,720
Speaker 3: I'm happy that I have the the outlets that I

113
00:06:16,800 --> 00:06:23,240
Speaker 3: have to heal. Like I go to therapy twice a week. Yeah,

114
00:06:23,279 --> 00:06:26,000
Speaker 3: I have therapy twice a week. Sometimes it's hard to

115
00:06:26,040 --> 00:06:32,480
Speaker 3: go physically because a whole lot of reasons. But that

116
00:06:32,640 --> 00:06:37,320
Speaker 3: makes me feel good and that I'm making the right choice.

117
00:06:37,760 --> 00:06:40,640
Speaker 3: But yeah, there's moments where I just like, I mean,

118
00:06:40,880 --> 00:06:44,640
Speaker 3: during this whole thing, and like, the choices that I've

119
00:06:44,680 --> 00:06:48,320
Speaker 3: made have also made me feel kind of bad, like

120
00:06:48,800 --> 00:06:51,280
Speaker 3: going on Twitter, Like I'll go on Twitter, or I'll

121
00:06:51,360 --> 00:06:53,200
Speaker 3: like the worst thing is when I wake up in

122
00:06:53,240 --> 00:06:55,200
Speaker 3: the morning and I open my phone up, because then

123
00:06:55,240 --> 00:06:56,800
Speaker 3: it's like harder for me to get out of bed,

124
00:06:57,839 --> 00:07:00,880
Speaker 3: and it's like it's it kind of sucks the life

125
00:07:00,920 --> 00:07:03,159
Speaker 3: out of you, like being on there and then you

126
00:07:03,240 --> 00:07:07,119
Speaker 3: kind of go. Today I didn't, oh you know, maybe

127
00:07:07,120 --> 00:07:09,400
Speaker 3: a little bit I could have. I think it was

128
00:07:09,400 --> 00:07:10,680
Speaker 3: just hard for me to add that. No, I don't

129
00:07:10,680 --> 00:07:12,559
Speaker 3: think I doomed scroll. I didn't doom scroll today.

130
00:07:13,280 --> 00:07:14,240
Speaker 2: Call it doom scroll.

131
00:07:14,480 --> 00:07:19,120
Speaker 5: It's called doom scrolling. Oh, but that for you, you know,

132
00:07:19,200 --> 00:07:20,480
Speaker 5: it's fine.

133
00:07:20,320 --> 00:07:24,160
Speaker 3: But it's okay, and that that's going to happen again too.

134
00:07:24,240 --> 00:07:27,840
Speaker 3: It's gonna happen one hundred thousand more times possibly.

135
00:07:27,920 --> 00:07:29,800
Speaker 2: What have you learned about how to manage that? Though?

136
00:07:29,840 --> 00:07:31,480
Speaker 1: Because if you want a therapy twice a week, you

137
00:07:31,600 --> 00:07:33,240
Speaker 1: have to, like, by the way I'm doing it once

138
00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:34,840
Speaker 1: I go once a week, no matter what.

139
00:07:34,720 --> 00:07:36,960
Speaker 2: Good or bad, like I have a great week, I

140
00:07:37,000 --> 00:07:39,200
Speaker 2: still do it. That's how much I believe in it. Yeah,

141
00:07:39,200 --> 00:07:42,760
Speaker 2: I just think it's like opportunity to get to know yourself.

142
00:07:43,000 --> 00:07:44,840
Speaker 3: Yep, exactly whatever, get.

143
00:07:44,640 --> 00:07:46,960
Speaker 1: To know yourself, the good, the bad, all the things.

144
00:07:47,160 --> 00:07:50,560
Speaker 1: So twice a week is interesting, though, that's like another

145
00:07:50,720 --> 00:07:51,720
Speaker 1: that's like a level up.

146
00:07:52,040 --> 00:07:57,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm trying to make sure to make I don't

147
00:07:57,680 --> 00:07:59,800
Speaker 3: know that just that I'm all right. I'm just trying

148
00:07:59,800 --> 00:08:02,680
Speaker 3: to make sure that I'm talking about everything that I

149
00:08:02,760 --> 00:08:03,680
Speaker 3: need to talk about.

150
00:08:04,240 --> 00:08:06,840
Speaker 2: And also just I'm I'm.

151
00:08:06,760 --> 00:08:08,680
Speaker 3: Excited to get to know myself. I think that's a

152
00:08:08,680 --> 00:08:10,920
Speaker 3: big thing in therapy. It's like you got to get

153
00:08:10,920 --> 00:08:14,720
Speaker 3: to know yourself. I feel like that's yeah, that's kind

154
00:08:14,720 --> 00:08:17,240
Speaker 3: of what we all sort of go through. We learn

155
00:08:17,440 --> 00:08:21,520
Speaker 3: things and we lock into these things that don't benefit

156
00:08:21,680 --> 00:08:26,520
Speaker 3: us because of an experience that we had or multiple

157
00:08:26,520 --> 00:08:28,480
Speaker 3: experiences that we had as a child.

158
00:08:29,240 --> 00:08:30,440
Speaker 2: What was your childhood?

159
00:08:30,520 --> 00:08:33,839
Speaker 5: Like, my god, I know we want to go, you know,

160
00:08:34,120 --> 00:08:35,280
Speaker 5: to mercy so.

161
00:08:35,440 --> 00:08:36,880
Speaker 2: Much, so much.

162
00:08:37,160 --> 00:08:40,080
Speaker 3: It's a I mean it's not this isn't for for

163
00:08:40,160 --> 00:08:43,880
Speaker 3: a I don't know what for a full documentary. This

164
00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:46,200
Speaker 3: might be for a voy you could give me like

165
00:08:46,320 --> 00:08:50,360
Speaker 3: a man, versions I had a fun childhood. I had

166
00:08:50,800 --> 00:08:57,840
Speaker 3: a very I had a very tough childhood. I mean

167
00:08:58,880 --> 00:09:02,720
Speaker 3: I think growing up like with a single mother is

168
00:09:02,760 --> 00:09:07,280
Speaker 3: a hard thing to do. And many kids that she

169
00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:16,160
Speaker 3: have to five wow, five, I could never know. She's

170
00:09:16,320 --> 00:09:20,440
Speaker 3: incredibly the strongest mother, But like it taught me a

171
00:09:20,440 --> 00:09:23,920
Speaker 3: lot of things, and I think it also made me,

172
00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:25,400
Speaker 3: in some form stronger.

173
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,160
Speaker 2: Let's take these off. I want to see.

174
00:09:27,600 --> 00:09:28,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, are this prescription?

175
00:09:29,559 --> 00:09:31,640
Speaker 2: No, it's to cover when I have bags on the last.

176
00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:34,440
Speaker 3: Oh no, you look absolutely stunning, unbelievably good.

177
00:09:35,240 --> 00:09:37,760
Speaker 1: Hey guys, You ever sign up for a phone plan

178
00:09:37,920 --> 00:09:40,840
Speaker 1: thinking wow, this is a great price, and then a

179
00:09:40,840 --> 00:09:44,120
Speaker 1: few months later it's like a surprise, this bill is higher.

180
00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:48,359
Speaker 1: With Boost Mobile, you pay twenty five dollars a month forever.

181
00:09:48,679 --> 00:09:52,079
Speaker 1: That's unlimited talk, text and data starting at just twenty

182
00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:56,920
Speaker 1: five dollars a month, So no price hikes, no contract forever. Plus,

183
00:09:57,000 --> 00:09:59,880
Speaker 1: Boost Mobile is now a legit nationwide five G network.

184
00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:03,960
Speaker 1: I have invested billions building five G towers across the country.

185
00:10:04,120 --> 00:10:06,000
Speaker 2: So visit boostmobile dot.

186
00:10:05,840 --> 00:10:08,560
Speaker 1: Com or head to your local boothstore today and get

187
00:10:08,679 --> 00:10:12,360
Speaker 1: unlimited talk, text and data for twenty five dollars a

188
00:10:12,400 --> 00:10:16,400
Speaker 1: month forever. Five G speeds not available in all areas.

189
00:10:16,440 --> 00:10:20,400
Speaker 1: After thirty gigabytes, customers may experience lower speeds. Customers will

190
00:10:20,400 --> 00:10:22,400
Speaker 1: pay twenty five dollars a month as long as they

191
00:10:22,440 --> 00:10:24,760
Speaker 1: remain active on the Boost Unlimited plan.

192
00:10:26,480 --> 00:10:31,200
Speaker 3: But I mean, yeah, it's made me stronger, if anything.

193
00:10:31,240 --> 00:10:33,079
Speaker 2: And so I'm single mom, so I get it too.

194
00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:36,520
Speaker 1: But I'm single mom, only child, one bedroom apartment, and

195
00:10:36,559 --> 00:10:38,240
Speaker 1: even still, I don't know how she did that.

196
00:10:38,480 --> 00:10:40,920
Speaker 2: She's working, I'm running around being a lunatic.

197
00:10:41,440 --> 00:10:45,000
Speaker 1: She's navigating her crazy little daughter and her one child.

198
00:10:45,080 --> 00:10:47,480
Speaker 2: Five children is like, that's yeah.

199
00:10:47,520 --> 00:10:51,080
Speaker 3: And I mean when it's five children, everyone's sort of

200
00:10:51,320 --> 00:10:56,400
Speaker 3: broken apart because it's a lot of children and no help.

201
00:10:57,520 --> 00:10:59,000
Speaker 3: And not to say there was no help. I had

202
00:10:59,040 --> 00:11:03,400
Speaker 3: a lot of aunties, a lot of aunties, especially growing

203
00:11:03,480 --> 00:11:04,240
Speaker 3: up on the Ashron.

204
00:11:04,640 --> 00:11:07,600
Speaker 2: How do they feel about the level of success that

205
00:11:07,640 --> 00:11:08,439
Speaker 2: you've achieved.

206
00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:12,920
Speaker 3: Like, she's so supportive, she's so proud, and she tells

207
00:11:12,920 --> 00:11:15,640
Speaker 3: me like every other day she's like, I'm so proud

208
00:11:15,679 --> 00:11:19,679
Speaker 3: of you, and I'm so I'm so excited, and I

209
00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:22,079
Speaker 3: loved your I love your dress, I love the thing

210
00:11:22,160 --> 00:11:26,000
Speaker 3: you did with the song, and I love everything. She's

211
00:11:26,040 --> 00:11:27,440
Speaker 3: like that every every other day.

212
00:11:27,520 --> 00:11:28,720
Speaker 2: So put her in your video.

213
00:11:29,080 --> 00:11:32,520
Speaker 3: Yeah, And then I put out my video and she's

214
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:35,480
Speaker 3: she really did no, no, no, tell me.

215
00:11:35,440 --> 00:11:36,120
Speaker 2: About that day.

216
00:11:36,280 --> 00:11:39,280
Speaker 3: You only get like two seconds of that. And she

217
00:11:39,880 --> 00:11:43,280
Speaker 3: when she was on set, she came she came into

218
00:11:43,360 --> 00:11:47,360
Speaker 3: set like totally fine. She was just really happy to

219
00:11:47,400 --> 00:11:50,720
Speaker 3: see me, lots of smiles, and then like we talked

220
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:52,440
Speaker 3: a little bit and then we got in front of camera.

221
00:11:53,480 --> 00:11:55,800
Speaker 3: I helped kind of dress her a little bit to

222
00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:59,800
Speaker 3: make it feel like the mom that I know. She

223
00:12:00,040 --> 00:12:04,440
Speaker 3: looked like I know, yeah, she looks like she was

224
00:12:04,480 --> 00:12:10,280
Speaker 3: just evolved and incredible, and I, uh, yeah, she.

225
00:12:12,040 --> 00:12:13,400
Speaker 2: Let's say it. Say it.

226
00:12:14,440 --> 00:12:15,400
Speaker 3: You know it's dumb.

227
00:12:15,679 --> 00:12:20,040
Speaker 2: I don't want to say that she hit my bake.

228
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:27,000
Speaker 2: It's like, I don't.

229
00:12:27,040 --> 00:12:29,000
Speaker 3: I didn't know that she was like that. I didn't

230
00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:30,520
Speaker 3: know that she would come in front of camera and

231
00:12:30,559 --> 00:12:33,000
Speaker 3: like I was like, who are you? Because she like

232
00:12:33,600 --> 00:12:37,040
Speaker 3: really was. If you look at all of the whatever

233
00:12:37,120 --> 00:12:43,280
Speaker 3: playback that we have, she's like just really giving like.

234
00:12:43,280 --> 00:12:48,080
Speaker 6: She and I was like, oh, that's why I wanted,

235
00:12:48,440 --> 00:12:53,840
Speaker 6: That's why I do that half is good, that's why.

236
00:12:53,960 --> 00:12:55,440
Speaker 2: The teachers arrived.

237
00:12:55,520 --> 00:12:57,960
Speaker 3: And I was like, Okay, that's where it comes from.

238
00:12:58,160 --> 00:12:59,760
Speaker 3: I didn't know. I always knew when she did her

239
00:12:59,760 --> 00:13:01,400
Speaker 3: make up for the mirror that she was always like,

240
00:13:02,000 --> 00:13:03,480
Speaker 3: but like I didn't know, like in front of a

241
00:13:03,520 --> 00:13:09,559
Speaker 3: camera that she would absolutely ace every single take, even

242
00:13:09,600 --> 00:13:11,679
Speaker 3: while they were doing her makeup and we were kind

243
00:13:11,720 --> 00:13:14,640
Speaker 3: of just watching the live and it wasn't recording or anything.

244
00:13:15,559 --> 00:13:17,800
Speaker 3: She was still serving like they were doing her make

245
00:13:17,840 --> 00:13:18,480
Speaker 3: them check.

246
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:23,600
Speaker 2: Oh you're no way what?

247
00:13:25,040 --> 00:13:25,400
Speaker 1: Oh?

248
00:13:25,480 --> 00:13:26,520
Speaker 3: It blew my mind?

249
00:13:26,840 --> 00:13:28,079
Speaker 2: How a great moment is that?

250
00:13:28,080 --> 00:13:30,920
Speaker 1: Though, Like when you think about our lives, that will

251
00:13:30,920 --> 00:13:32,760
Speaker 1: be a moment that you will have that forever with

252
00:13:32,800 --> 00:13:33,200
Speaker 1: your mom.

253
00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:36,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, you'll have the visuals of that and the experience

254
00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:38,080
Speaker 2: of that will light you up, like forever.

255
00:13:38,320 --> 00:13:39,000
Speaker 3: It's amazing.

256
00:13:39,120 --> 00:13:41,360
Speaker 2: Your mom is for sure gonna want to be in

257
00:13:41,440 --> 00:13:42,000
Speaker 2: more things.

258
00:13:42,720 --> 00:13:45,600
Speaker 3: Well yeah, well now I just want to like dress

259
00:13:45,600 --> 00:13:48,240
Speaker 3: her all the time and bring her everywhere and like

260
00:13:48,480 --> 00:13:51,439
Speaker 3: I mean, I always do. But that just I loved

261
00:13:51,480 --> 00:13:54,640
Speaker 3: having her on set with me. And that's something that

262
00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:56,280
Speaker 3: I'm not scared of anymore.

263
00:13:56,559 --> 00:13:58,400
Speaker 2: How would she managed watching her baby?

264
00:13:58,600 --> 00:14:01,160
Speaker 1: You know me as famous upset, You've had moments where

265
00:14:01,200 --> 00:14:03,600
Speaker 1: people are coming for your neck, or are you with people,

266
00:14:03,720 --> 00:14:07,480
Speaker 1: or you're in the highs or the lows of whatever, whatever,

267
00:14:08,120 --> 00:14:10,240
Speaker 1: the ups and downs of fame and the weirdness that

268
00:14:10,280 --> 00:14:11,040
Speaker 1: she calls me.

269
00:14:11,200 --> 00:14:14,840
Speaker 3: She calls me and she'll just like make sure I'm okay,

270
00:14:14,920 --> 00:14:17,240
Speaker 3: and she'll text me and she'll be like, don't listen.

271
00:14:17,320 --> 00:14:19,960
Speaker 3: Know what they're saying, babe, stuff like that, she.

272
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:23,160
Speaker 2: Ever check you? Say? I don't love that you did that?

273
00:14:23,400 --> 00:14:26,320
Speaker 3: No, she doesn't, and you can you can see that

274
00:14:26,400 --> 00:14:31,720
Speaker 3: I never really got checked. But sometimes I definitely act

275
00:14:31,720 --> 00:14:32,880
Speaker 3: like I've never been checked.

276
00:14:33,000 --> 00:14:36,320
Speaker 2: So who can check you? Can anyone check you? You

277
00:14:36,400 --> 00:14:37,640
Speaker 2: need somebody to check you.

278
00:14:37,840 --> 00:14:40,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I get checked. I definitely checked, and not not

279
00:14:40,520 --> 00:14:44,840
Speaker 3: by my mom, but like I get checks team yeah, no,

280
00:14:44,920 --> 00:14:48,440
Speaker 3: my friends, friends, yeah, and my team. My team, My

281
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:51,320
Speaker 3: team's good at that. Sometimes I have to check them

282
00:14:51,440 --> 00:14:56,120
Speaker 3: to check me. So I have to be like, I

283
00:14:56,320 --> 00:14:58,880
Speaker 3: need this from you. I need you to tell me

284
00:14:58,960 --> 00:15:03,720
Speaker 3: that I'm doing this because this is I'm embarrassed by

285
00:15:03,760 --> 00:15:06,840
Speaker 3: this thing that I did, and in order to keep

286
00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:12,320
Speaker 3: things afloat, I need some form of And I have

287
00:15:12,440 --> 00:15:16,680
Speaker 3: incredible support from my team, and that's I mean, that's

288
00:15:16,800 --> 00:15:20,360
Speaker 3: all you could really ask for. But I feel like

289
00:15:20,400 --> 00:15:25,720
Speaker 3: there's there's something really important about like them also checking

290
00:15:25,720 --> 00:15:28,920
Speaker 3: you and making sure that yeah, not just being like, oh,

291
00:15:28,960 --> 00:15:31,720
Speaker 3: you're so funny all the time, and like you're the

292
00:15:31,840 --> 00:15:32,800
Speaker 3: funniest person.

293
00:15:32,920 --> 00:15:33,320
Speaker 2: I know.

294
00:15:33,600 --> 00:15:35,680
Speaker 3: You look amazing in a trash bag.

295
00:15:35,760 --> 00:15:38,680
Speaker 1: You're the perfect But how do you deal with that though,

296
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:41,240
Speaker 1: How are you with criticism or feedback that maybe you

297
00:15:41,320 --> 00:15:42,640
Speaker 1: disagree with the Are you open to that.

298
00:15:43,160 --> 00:15:47,160
Speaker 3: I don't love I don't love being stroked, and sometimes

299
00:15:47,200 --> 00:15:51,880
Speaker 3: maybe I am stroked or kidding. I'm absolutely I get

300
00:15:51,880 --> 00:15:57,680
Speaker 3: stroked and people kind of like when I experience that,

301
00:15:58,920 --> 00:16:07,320
Speaker 3: I I don't love it, and it's I'm it makes

302
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:12,240
Speaker 3: me scared. I get I get afraid when something doesn't

303
00:16:12,280 --> 00:16:13,920
Speaker 3: feel like a genuine you.

304
00:16:13,960 --> 00:16:18,320
Speaker 2: Looking for truth? Yeah, you want truth more than something yeah? Sweet?

305
00:16:18,800 --> 00:16:21,760
Speaker 3: Yeah. And I know like laughter comes from nervousness sometimes,

306
00:16:21,800 --> 00:16:25,120
Speaker 3: so if somebody's laughing at everything I say, then I'm like, well,

307
00:16:25,160 --> 00:16:28,240
Speaker 3: they're probably fucking like nervous and like they're just trying

308
00:16:28,240 --> 00:16:30,360
Speaker 3: to like figure out how to do this ship.

309
00:16:30,480 --> 00:16:31,640
Speaker 2: And so I hate.

310
00:16:33,400 --> 00:16:35,440
Speaker 3: Everything me too. I don't like it either because I

311
00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:38,280
Speaker 3: feel bad for that part. I didn't start to feel like, well,

312
00:16:39,320 --> 00:16:41,200
Speaker 3: I mean, at least they're laughing their way through it,

313
00:16:41,320 --> 00:16:45,600
Speaker 3: Like there's something like I can't be around that that's funny.

314
00:16:45,640 --> 00:16:48,480
Speaker 2: I've never really heard somebody else say that. That definitely

315
00:16:48,480 --> 00:16:50,360
Speaker 2: makes me have family members to it.

316
00:16:50,360 --> 00:16:51,200
Speaker 3: It's too much.

317
00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:52,120
Speaker 2: Not that funny.

318
00:16:52,360 --> 00:16:53,040
Speaker 3: Nothing is that.

319
00:16:53,120 --> 00:16:55,640
Speaker 2: Nothing is that funny nobody is that funny? Why is

320
00:16:55,640 --> 00:16:58,640
Speaker 2: that funny at all? Right now?

321
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:01,200
Speaker 3: Just thinking about it, it pisss me on, like I

322
00:17:01,240 --> 00:17:02,800
Speaker 3: can't even hide it, it really does.

323
00:17:04,000 --> 00:17:05,280
Speaker 2: That's funny. Hey, guys.

324
00:17:05,280 --> 00:17:07,200
Speaker 3: Today's show is brought to you by hard Rock Bet.

325
00:17:07,400 --> 00:17:10,120
Speaker 1: Hard Rock Bets is a sports book app, and it's

326
00:17:10,119 --> 00:17:12,120
Speaker 1: a really simple sports book app.

327
00:17:12,160 --> 00:17:14,000
Speaker 2: If you just want to see what everyone's talking.

328
00:17:13,800 --> 00:17:15,680
Speaker 1: About, or if you don't even really care about the game,

329
00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:17,320
Speaker 1: but you want to make it a little more interesting,

330
00:17:17,640 --> 00:17:19,680
Speaker 1: you could just bet a buck or two very easy,

331
00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:22,560
Speaker 1: and one hard rock Bet player last week turned a

332
00:17:22,640 --> 00:17:26,840
Speaker 1: three dollar bet into over twenty nine thousand dollars in winnings.

333
00:17:26,920 --> 00:17:28,439
Speaker 1: And if you want to see more wins like that,

334
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:29,920
Speaker 1: or you just want to see what I'm talking about,

335
00:17:29,960 --> 00:17:32,720
Speaker 1: you can follow at hard rock Bet on social. Football

336
00:17:32,720 --> 00:17:34,440
Speaker 1: season is still going, so if you want to try

337
00:17:34,480 --> 00:17:37,040
Speaker 1: your first bet on hard rock Bet, you can get

338
00:17:37,040 --> 00:17:39,880
Speaker 1: one hundred and fifty dollars bonus bets if you win.

339
00:17:40,119 --> 00:17:41,960
Speaker 1: Just place a five dollar bet and if that hits

340
00:17:42,280 --> 00:17:43,879
Speaker 1: you get not only your winnings, but you get one

341
00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:46,560
Speaker 1: hundred and fifty dollars in extra bonus bets. And since

342
00:17:46,600 --> 00:17:49,040
Speaker 1: it's Wednesday, if you're already betting on hard Rock Bet

343
00:17:49,040 --> 00:17:49,879
Speaker 1: sportsbook app.

344
00:17:50,080 --> 00:17:51,119
Speaker 2: You know what that means.

345
00:17:51,320 --> 00:17:55,240
Speaker 1: It's the last last day to use your legendary reward drops.

346
00:17:55,520 --> 00:17:57,199
Speaker 1: Open up the app today and you can have a

347
00:17:57,240 --> 00:17:59,680
Speaker 1: bonus bet or who knows what's in there, all kinds

348
00:17:59,720 --> 00:18:02,360
Speaker 1: of stuff and it's always a nice surprise. So new

349
00:18:02,400 --> 00:18:05,560
Speaker 1: rewards drop tomorrow. Don't miss out. Head over to the

350
00:18:05,560 --> 00:18:08,399
Speaker 1: hard Rock Bet app and make your deposit payable and

351
00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:11,200
Speaker 1: bonus bets not a cash offer offered by the Seminole

352
00:18:11,240 --> 00:18:13,960
Speaker 1: Tribe of Florida and Florida offered by a Seminole hard

353
00:18:14,040 --> 00:18:16,520
Speaker 1: Rock Digital LLC in all other states. Must be twenty

354
00:18:16,520 --> 00:18:21,359
Speaker 1: one or older and physically president in Arizona, Colorado, Florida, Illinois, Indiana,

355
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:23,800
Speaker 1: New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee, or Virginia to play.

356
00:18:24,000 --> 00:18:25,040
Speaker 2: Terms and conditions apply.

357
00:18:25,200 --> 00:18:28,000
Speaker 1: Concerned about gambling and Florida, call one eight eight eight

358
00:18:28,040 --> 00:18:30,560
Speaker 1: admitute in Indiana. If you are someone you know has

359
00:18:30,560 --> 00:18:33,200
Speaker 1: a gambling problem and wants help, call one eight hundred

360
00:18:33,240 --> 00:18:36,440
Speaker 1: and nine with it gambling problem called one eight hundred

361
00:18:36,520 --> 00:18:47,000
Speaker 1: Gambler in Arizona, Colorado, Illinois, New Jersey, Ohio, Tennessee, Virginia.

362
00:18:47,280 --> 00:18:48,520
Speaker 2: Then speaking of funny.

363
00:18:48,560 --> 00:18:50,280
Speaker 1: The last time I spoke to you, we did this

364
00:18:50,359 --> 00:18:54,480
Speaker 1: Harper's Bizarre magazine interview, and you said that you wanted to.

365
00:18:54,440 --> 00:18:58,520
Speaker 2: Do stand up yes, that you actually were funny. There

366
00:18:58,640 --> 00:19:00,760
Speaker 2: was so maybe you actually are funny.

367
00:19:00,800 --> 00:19:02,000
Speaker 3: I think I can be funny.

368
00:19:02,000 --> 00:19:03,080
Speaker 2: It'd be funny.

369
00:19:03,240 --> 00:19:06,439
Speaker 1: I haven't done it though, Huh. It doesn't feel like

370
00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,520
Speaker 1: the error right now. It doesn't kind of go with

371
00:19:08,640 --> 00:19:09,120
Speaker 1: the you.

372
00:19:09,040 --> 00:19:12,880
Speaker 3: Know, there might be a time, but I just yeah, honestly,

373
00:19:13,200 --> 00:19:15,080
Speaker 3: if it was any time to do it, it would

374
00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:19,280
Speaker 3: be it would be now, really yeah, because there's something

375
00:19:19,320 --> 00:19:22,080
Speaker 3: about the eighties and like stand up comedy.

376
00:19:22,160 --> 00:19:23,440
Speaker 2: It's giving like eighties.

377
00:19:23,880 --> 00:19:30,240
Speaker 1: It's like somewhere between uh, Richard Richard pryor ed hilarious,

378
00:19:30,560 --> 00:19:32,520
Speaker 1: all leather color, leather outfit.

379
00:19:32,720 --> 00:19:37,400
Speaker 2: Yes, you're coming out with the color. I can absolutely

380
00:19:37,440 --> 00:19:37,840
Speaker 2: see this.

381
00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:41,360
Speaker 3: Like that makes me think of that, Will you do that?

382
00:19:41,880 --> 00:19:43,560
Speaker 3: I feel like that would be really fun to do

383
00:19:43,640 --> 00:19:46,600
Speaker 3: something like some sort of content piece and like film,

384
00:19:46,720 --> 00:19:49,159
Speaker 3: something that feels kind of vintage, but like do like

385
00:19:49,200 --> 00:19:51,120
Speaker 3: a seventy piece.

386
00:19:51,119 --> 00:19:52,359
Speaker 2: I think you should do it. I think you have

387
00:19:52,440 --> 00:19:52,760
Speaker 2: it in you.

388
00:19:53,320 --> 00:19:54,840
Speaker 3: It could be fun and.

389
00:19:54,760 --> 00:19:57,719
Speaker 2: Then people will be laughing for a reason. And make

390
00:19:57,800 --> 00:19:58,720
Speaker 2: everybody feel better.

391
00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:03,520
Speaker 1: Okay, let's about what's important. Also, I have some in

392
00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,680
Speaker 1: real life questions because I just are in real life.

393
00:20:05,760 --> 00:20:07,199
Speaker 2: Bowl grab What.

394
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:11,600
Speaker 3: Is the hardest lesson you learned in this life?

395
00:20:11,720 --> 00:20:13,080
Speaker 2: You can go to the next one if you feel

396
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:14,520
Speaker 2: like there might be a better one. I think that's

397
00:20:14,560 --> 00:20:15,160
Speaker 2: a great question.

398
00:20:15,200 --> 00:20:18,320
Speaker 3: Okay, good, okay, okay, what is the hardest lesson you

399
00:20:18,400 --> 00:20:20,639
Speaker 3: learned in this life? The hardest lesson I learned in

400
00:20:20,680 --> 00:20:30,560
Speaker 3: this life is that I am a grown woman with

401
00:20:31,520 --> 00:20:36,359
Speaker 3: a child on the inside, and that I need to

402
00:20:36,600 --> 00:20:43,560
Speaker 3: mitigate that child or there actually is three people. And

403
00:20:43,600 --> 00:20:46,520
Speaker 3: I don't mean this in any sort of like harsh

404
00:20:46,760 --> 00:20:51,159
Speaker 3: diagnosis of like I don't have a condition. It's just

405
00:20:51,280 --> 00:20:55,479
Speaker 3: the it's the reality is that I am now an adult,

406
00:20:56,160 --> 00:20:59,879
Speaker 3: but there is a younger girl who's taking care of

407
00:21:00,080 --> 00:21:05,440
Speaker 3: an even younger girl. So there's a baby, but this

408
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:08,359
Speaker 3: one is the one that I need to take control of.

409
00:21:09,040 --> 00:21:11,680
Speaker 3: And this lesson is still something I'm still learning.

410
00:21:12,240 --> 00:21:15,199
Speaker 2: Oh my god, I need I need that in my

411
00:21:15,240 --> 00:21:15,679
Speaker 2: life now.

412
00:21:15,880 --> 00:21:20,960
Speaker 3: Is that there's a bratty teenager who lashes out and.

413
00:21:20,920 --> 00:21:23,760
Speaker 1: Does that's the middle.

414
00:21:24,400 --> 00:21:27,920
Speaker 3: This is my protector, So this is my defense. System,

415
00:21:28,240 --> 00:21:30,760
Speaker 3: and I need to figure out how to control that

416
00:21:30,840 --> 00:21:34,960
Speaker 3: defense system because it gets in the way of my success.

417
00:21:35,000 --> 00:21:36,840
Speaker 3: It gets in the way of things that are good

418
00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:42,160
Speaker 3: for me, and it's not permanent. It's something that can

419
00:21:42,240 --> 00:21:46,160
Speaker 3: really truly be healed. But that's something that I'm that's

420
00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:48,080
Speaker 3: the hardest, hardest lesson.

421
00:21:48,880 --> 00:21:51,800
Speaker 2: Huh do you think this is everybody has this or

422
00:21:51,840 --> 00:21:52,480
Speaker 2: this is just you?

423
00:21:52,680 --> 00:21:55,520
Speaker 3: I think a lot of people haven't. I think a lot.

424
00:21:55,800 --> 00:21:57,719
Speaker 2: I mean, we hear people talk about talking to their

425
00:21:57,720 --> 00:22:01,280
Speaker 2: inner child and whatever, but never really hurt. Is that way.

426
00:22:01,640 --> 00:22:04,520
Speaker 3: When you see people who are doing things that are

427
00:22:05,119 --> 00:22:11,560
Speaker 3: are damaging to themselves, damaging to their future, damaging to

428
00:22:11,640 --> 00:22:21,040
Speaker 3: their relationships, it's usually because they are resorting to a

429
00:22:21,119 --> 00:22:24,560
Speaker 3: defense that has worked for them when they were really little,

430
00:22:25,640 --> 00:22:29,800
Speaker 3: and it's not it doesn't work for them now because

431
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:33,760
Speaker 3: it's not in relation to what is the issue that

432
00:22:33,840 --> 00:22:37,760
Speaker 3: they're trying to fix now, got it. It's a thing

433
00:22:37,920 --> 00:22:42,240
Speaker 3: that they just know that because that was like the

434
00:22:42,280 --> 00:22:45,000
Speaker 3: biggest horrible thing that happened to them when they were little,

435
00:22:45,000 --> 00:22:47,160
Speaker 3: and so they're like, Okay, if this is going to help,

436
00:22:47,200 --> 00:22:48,760
Speaker 3: then I'm going to use this later.

437
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:50,760
Speaker 2: For the rest of my life. Yes, yes, when you

438
00:22:50,840 --> 00:22:51,840
Speaker 2: no longer need it.

439
00:22:52,240 --> 00:22:55,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's so good. That's a little bit of me

440
00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:56,600
Speaker 3: in a nutshell.

441
00:22:56,800 --> 00:23:02,720
Speaker 2: You fucking boded that question to the next level. So

442
00:23:03,200 --> 00:23:06,560
Speaker 2: that middle one of you, is she the one.

443
00:23:06,400 --> 00:23:10,240
Speaker 1: Who sometimes says things that get people riled up?

444
00:23:10,760 --> 00:23:11,440
Speaker 2: For yes?

445
00:23:15,600 --> 00:23:18,400
Speaker 1: So then do you shy away from that or isn't

446
00:23:18,400 --> 00:23:20,359
Speaker 1: that or is that part of who you really like?

447
00:23:21,520 --> 00:23:26,880
Speaker 2: If you removed that person, is it really still you then?

448
00:23:27,160 --> 00:23:31,879
Speaker 3: Or don't remove them? You don't remove them. You you

449
00:23:32,040 --> 00:23:36,680
Speaker 3: give them a sense of direction and you recognize before

450
00:23:37,000 --> 00:23:41,119
Speaker 3: they step forward, and so that instead of them getting

451
00:23:41,200 --> 00:23:43,639
Speaker 3: up out of their seat and having to be like

452
00:23:43,720 --> 00:23:48,840
Speaker 3: this you you go, no, you can sit down, just

453
00:23:48,880 --> 00:23:49,359
Speaker 3: sit down.

454
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:52,960
Speaker 1: You used her as a way, especially when you got

455
00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:55,240
Speaker 1: when you got thrown into fame, right, it was like.

456
00:23:55,240 --> 00:23:59,320
Speaker 2: Noisy a lot right at the time. So she probably

457
00:23:59,400 --> 00:24:01,880
Speaker 2: came to your defense.

458
00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:04,760
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, she was protective.

459
00:24:04,840 --> 00:24:08,760
Speaker 1: So she shows up, wants to argue people the internet,

460
00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:11,040
Speaker 1: she wants she wants to stand up for herself.

461
00:24:11,080 --> 00:24:12,800
Speaker 2: She wants to say whatever the fuck she means about

462
00:24:12,840 --> 00:24:13,480
Speaker 2: how you receive it.

463
00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:18,199
Speaker 5: Yeah, that kind of tracks. Yeah, So how do you

464
00:24:18,280 --> 00:24:20,800
Speaker 5: manage her now? Because this is like an evolved version

465
00:24:20,840 --> 00:24:23,840
Speaker 5: of you. Now you're not the same person. Well maybe

466
00:24:23,840 --> 00:24:26,080
Speaker 5: you are, but you evolved and grown and.

467
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:34,040
Speaker 3: It's in there. It's in there one hundred percent. Yeah.

468
00:24:34,119 --> 00:24:37,720
Speaker 3: I think it's like, uh see, this is why it's hard,

469
00:24:37,760 --> 00:24:42,639
Speaker 3: because I'm now trying to explain what it looks like

470
00:24:42,840 --> 00:24:49,719
Speaker 3: when it happens. So if, for instance, I feel threatened

471
00:24:49,840 --> 00:24:55,800
Speaker 3: by something and I see the threat, I go, what

472
00:24:55,880 --> 00:25:01,080
Speaker 3: has this made me feel like? And then I remember

473
00:25:01,200 --> 00:25:08,960
Speaker 3: my reactions in the past, and then I choose accordingly

474
00:25:09,040 --> 00:25:18,640
Speaker 3: what that that response should be. Yeah, sometimes when you're scared,

475
00:25:18,680 --> 00:25:21,480
Speaker 3: it's like you're or you feel threatened. You just see

476
00:25:21,560 --> 00:25:24,359
Speaker 3: red and you just don't there's nothing you can do

477
00:25:24,400 --> 00:25:28,119
Speaker 3: about it, like you just get locked into a spot.

478
00:25:30,800 --> 00:25:33,280
Speaker 3: But I think that's sort of a way to do

479
00:25:33,560 --> 00:25:37,480
Speaker 3: another fun way to do it. I have a toy

480
00:25:37,560 --> 00:25:45,199
Speaker 3: in my purse, not like that. It's it's like a

481
00:25:45,240 --> 00:25:49,600
Speaker 3: Littlest Pet Shop cat like I when I so basically,

482
00:25:50,480 --> 00:25:53,040
Speaker 3: my therapist to me this, you take a toy from

483
00:25:53,040 --> 00:25:55,159
Speaker 3: your childhood and you keep it in your pocket, or

484
00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:57,600
Speaker 3: you keep it in your purse, or you put something

485
00:25:57,640 --> 00:25:59,879
Speaker 3: that it reminds you of your childhood, something that you

486
00:25:59,880 --> 00:26:03,800
Speaker 3: can touch, and that'll help you in the beginning stage

487
00:26:03,800 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 3: of reminding yourself that.

488
00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:07,240
Speaker 2: You're a little kid.

489
00:26:08,440 --> 00:26:11,360
Speaker 3: You've got it, you're a little kid. And so it's

490
00:26:11,520 --> 00:26:14,879
Speaker 3: really it's helped a lot because there's times where I

491
00:26:14,920 --> 00:26:18,000
Speaker 3: don't feel like I'm in a defense mode or anything

492
00:26:18,040 --> 00:26:20,080
Speaker 3: like that, and I just see it. I just see

493
00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:23,760
Speaker 3: that there's like a little plastic cat in my bag

494
00:26:23,880 --> 00:26:26,720
Speaker 3: or on a dresser or something in my house. I

495
00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:30,879
Speaker 3: had a bunch of them, and I'll like look at

496
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:34,080
Speaker 3: it and be like, that does happen to me, doesn't it.

497
00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:37,120
Speaker 3: It's like someone standing there, almost like an angel standing

498
00:26:37,160 --> 00:26:40,440
Speaker 3: there and telling you, like, by the way, you could

499
00:26:40,480 --> 00:26:46,000
Speaker 3: be an asshole, and that's like important. I think that's

500
00:26:46,000 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 3: like a really useful way to deal with stuff like that.

501
00:26:49,359 --> 00:26:52,560
Speaker 2: Huh do you ever have after one of those moments?

502
00:26:54,359 --> 00:26:56,199
Speaker 2: I don't know what comes up after that. So you

503
00:26:56,280 --> 00:26:59,119
Speaker 2: have one of those moments, I'm sure sometimes you're like

504
00:26:59,119 --> 00:27:01,159
Speaker 2: I said what I say said, which I said what

505
00:27:01,200 --> 00:27:01,600
Speaker 2: I said.

506
00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:05,679
Speaker 1: But I'm sure there are times where you probably a

507
00:27:05,680 --> 00:27:08,280
Speaker 1: little remorse about maybe how a message was to live it.

508
00:27:08,359 --> 00:27:09,120
Speaker 2: I think about.

509
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:12,280
Speaker 1: The the uh you got to think of your fans recently,

510
00:27:12,320 --> 00:27:14,760
Speaker 1: where you said, uh, you know what I'm talking about.

511
00:27:15,320 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 5: Uh huh.

512
00:27:15,920 --> 00:27:18,119
Speaker 1: It was, Yes, there was a thing I have with

513
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:21,080
Speaker 1: the fan and the and it was people that unfollowed

514
00:27:22,080 --> 00:27:26,080
Speaker 1: because it was received as you don't care about.

515
00:27:25,880 --> 00:27:31,080
Speaker 3: Yourself, that that situation is exactly this that we're talking about.

516
00:27:31,640 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 3: This was this was a moment of TELP me share

517
00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:35,200
Speaker 3: that me.

518
00:27:36,720 --> 00:27:38,399
Speaker 2: So it.

519
00:27:40,920 --> 00:27:43,280
Speaker 3: I don't like telling people my business. I guess do

520
00:27:43,400 --> 00:27:45,280
Speaker 3: one thing that you do, one thing that you fear

521
00:27:45,359 --> 00:27:52,840
Speaker 3: every day. So I guess, honestly, nah, fuck that. Well, okay,

522
00:27:53,000 --> 00:27:57,240
Speaker 3: So this was an instance of that. This was me

523
00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:04,520
Speaker 3: feeling like if I feel like people can come up

524
00:28:04,560 --> 00:28:10,520
Speaker 3: to me and either hold my arm or hug me,

525
00:28:11,040 --> 00:28:14,320
Speaker 3: or give me a kiss on the cheek or offer

526
00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:17,240
Speaker 3: me a gift, if I feel if I feel like

527
00:28:18,800 --> 00:28:23,399
Speaker 3: I've given everybody a pass to do that, that in

528
00:28:23,520 --> 00:28:27,320
Speaker 3: my mind looks like people tearing at my skin and

529
00:28:27,560 --> 00:28:30,919
Speaker 3: ripping off my hair and tearing at my clothes. It

530
00:28:30,960 --> 00:28:35,439
Speaker 3: looks like hell to me. And that means I have

531
00:28:35,560 --> 00:28:39,800
Speaker 3: no boundaries, and I had to set a boundary. However,

532
00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:45,040
Speaker 3: I wasn't in my right mind at that moment to

533
00:28:45,240 --> 00:28:49,800
Speaker 3: express that I had waited so many days because I

534
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:53,760
Speaker 3: have such an issue with setting boundaries for myself. I

535
00:28:53,880 --> 00:28:56,600
Speaker 3: usually am very like yes, like come, like.

536
00:28:57,600 --> 00:29:00,800
Speaker 2: Hug, touch, be, take whatever you want.

537
00:29:00,920 --> 00:29:03,480
Speaker 3: I've taken take whatever you want. I have a family,

538
00:29:04,560 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 3: like you know what I mean, that's me and so

539
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:09,520
Speaker 3: and so I I I've had a really hard time

540
00:29:09,560 --> 00:29:17,720
Speaker 3: setting boundaries. When I saw the virality in the way

541
00:29:17,760 --> 00:29:20,480
Speaker 3: that that to the way that that whole thing happened,

542
00:29:21,880 --> 00:29:25,840
Speaker 3: I thought that that meant, Okay, everybody, it's your turn.

543
00:29:27,040 --> 00:29:28,720
Speaker 3: And so I thought that if I stepped out of

544
00:29:28,760 --> 00:29:32,320
Speaker 3: my house, something would happen to me, all irrational fear,

545
00:29:33,240 --> 00:29:40,600
Speaker 3: all based on my own personal experience, and that kind

546
00:29:40,640 --> 00:29:48,920
Speaker 3: of that was a trigger for me. And I instead

547
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:53,000
Speaker 3: of being like, hey, by the way, don't do this,

548
00:29:53,800 --> 00:30:00,760
Speaker 3: I said, I said, don't fucking touch me. If any

549
00:30:00,840 --> 00:30:03,440
Speaker 3: of you ever come up to me and.

550
00:30:03,360 --> 00:30:05,440
Speaker 2: Touch me, you're done.

551
00:30:05,600 --> 00:30:07,920
Speaker 3: Like I made I was, I went like this, I

552
00:30:08,000 --> 00:30:11,040
Speaker 3: puffed my chest out. I did that. Instead of closing

553
00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:14,840
Speaker 3: the door, I kicked it and the knob fell off,

554
00:30:15,000 --> 00:30:17,360
Speaker 3: and so now the door is fully open, and now

555
00:30:17,440 --> 00:30:21,600
Speaker 3: I'm now I'm the I'm the least protected that I could.

556
00:30:21,640 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 3: If anything, I I sabotaged and I made it so

557
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:29,720
Speaker 3: that I couldn't be protected at all because it was

558
00:30:29,760 --> 00:30:35,320
Speaker 3: an over reaction, but a valid over reaction, but still

559
00:30:35,400 --> 00:30:36,680
Speaker 3: not excusable.

560
00:30:37,080 --> 00:30:37,280
Speaker 7: Right.

561
00:30:37,480 --> 00:30:41,880
Speaker 3: It's more, there's there's a lot of kind of twists

562
00:30:41,920 --> 00:30:45,160
Speaker 3: and turns to it, but it's it was a poorly

563
00:30:45,320 --> 00:30:48,560
Speaker 3: handled situation in conclusion.

564
00:30:49,760 --> 00:30:51,320
Speaker 1: I get that though, and I get how you could

565
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:53,720
Speaker 1: get there in that moment. Yeah, but when something happens

566
00:30:53,760 --> 00:30:56,760
Speaker 1: and it isn't poorly handled, do you is there remorse

567
00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:57,160
Speaker 1: about it?

568
00:30:57,240 --> 00:31:00,000
Speaker 2: Is there a desire to want to clear it up?

569
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:01,680
Speaker 2: Or it is? Kind of it is what it is.

570
00:31:01,800 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 3: So what happens with me is all this sort of

571
00:31:04,240 --> 00:31:07,800
Speaker 3: thing will happen. I'll be like, I'll be like, we're

572
00:31:07,840 --> 00:31:10,480
Speaker 3: how fuck you? And then I'll and then I'll go

573
00:31:10,920 --> 00:31:16,760
Speaker 3: and then I'll go I'm fine, everything's fine, Everything's okay, guys,

574
00:31:17,200 --> 00:31:22,320
Speaker 3: it's okay. Like that's my condition. That's sort of how

575
00:31:22,440 --> 00:31:27,080
Speaker 3: that works. It's there's a word for it, but I

576
00:31:27,240 --> 00:31:31,160
Speaker 3: just I could be my my next challenge is like

577
00:31:31,240 --> 00:31:35,440
Speaker 3: opening up about those things and saying what that is.

578
00:31:35,520 --> 00:31:39,000
Speaker 3: But that's sort of the way that I operate my

579
00:31:39,240 --> 00:31:46,040
Speaker 3: remorse levels. I do have remorse, and it's very it's

580
00:31:46,120 --> 00:31:50,000
Speaker 3: very it's very quick. It's very like jumped straight to

581
00:31:50,400 --> 00:31:52,240
Speaker 3: the way that when I when it comes to I

582
00:31:52,280 --> 00:31:57,160
Speaker 3: think when during the moment, nada because I'm seeing red

583
00:31:57,600 --> 00:32:01,320
Speaker 3: and I just don't care. I just don't care. But

584
00:32:01,440 --> 00:32:05,880
Speaker 3: when I see the effect that it has, that's when

585
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:06,640
Speaker 3: I start to.

586
00:32:08,760 --> 00:32:08,840
Speaker 1: This.

587
00:32:09,000 --> 00:32:16,920
Speaker 3: The chemicals change and I feel I feel wrong and

588
00:32:16,960 --> 00:32:20,959
Speaker 3: I and I know that it needs to be corrected

589
00:32:21,880 --> 00:32:25,640
Speaker 3: because it at the end of the day, the day

590
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:32,440
Speaker 3: hast end. But I know that I need help, and

591
00:32:32,520 --> 00:32:37,480
Speaker 3: I know that I can hurt people. I can't with

592
00:32:37,520 --> 00:32:40,080
Speaker 3: my words, with my actions, I know that I can,

593
00:32:41,920 --> 00:32:44,760
Speaker 3: and so anything that I can do to mitigate and

594
00:32:44,920 --> 00:32:50,400
Speaker 3: help those things, I'm gonna do. And that is therapy.

595
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:51,520
Speaker 2: So what would you want?

596
00:32:52,000 --> 00:32:54,200
Speaker 8: And I don't know if you've had this conversation directly

597
00:32:54,240 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 8: with your fans at any point I'm alive or whatever.

598
00:32:57,720 --> 00:33:01,240
Speaker 8: But have you ever like addressed because a bystander of

599
00:33:01,240 --> 00:33:02,600
Speaker 8: that could be somebody who was a big fan that

600
00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:04,360
Speaker 8: thinks they're lumped into a.

601
00:33:04,360 --> 00:33:07,160
Speaker 2: Moment that you had with one other person. That's what

602
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:10,040
Speaker 2: I'm wondering. If there's ever a.

603
00:33:09,400 --> 00:33:13,320
Speaker 3: You know, to clarify anything that I do to one

604
00:33:13,560 --> 00:33:17,520
Speaker 3: individual is between me and that individual or anything we

605
00:33:17,600 --> 00:33:23,520
Speaker 3: do to each other is between us, and it has

606
00:33:23,680 --> 00:33:33,240
Speaker 3: nothing like if it's me, i'd be smart. I think

607
00:33:34,520 --> 00:33:38,320
Speaker 3: it's always between the two people that the issue needs

608
00:33:38,360 --> 00:33:42,320
Speaker 3: to be resolved. When you put it on social media,

609
00:33:42,440 --> 00:33:46,440
Speaker 3: it becomes a performative thing. What I was doing when

610
00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:49,160
Speaker 3: I reacted in the way that it reacted was performative.

611
00:33:49,960 --> 00:33:52,040
Speaker 3: It was me being like, look how big I am,

612
00:33:52,320 --> 00:33:54,920
Speaker 3: Look how strong I am. That's me. That's an example

613
00:33:54,960 --> 00:33:59,520
Speaker 3: of me doing that very thing. Apologizing to somebody on

614
00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:04,000
Speaker 3: the internet is the same. You know what I mean.

615
00:34:04,120 --> 00:34:06,800
Speaker 3: Perform Please don't like. It's like it's being like, please

616
00:34:06,840 --> 00:34:11,319
Speaker 3: don't leave me, Please don't do please don't like I

617
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:14,040
Speaker 3: I I let me show you, Let me show you

618
00:34:14,080 --> 00:34:16,480
Speaker 3: how good I am. This is what I like, This

619
00:34:16,560 --> 00:34:18,719
Speaker 3: is what I do, This is who I am. Look,

620
00:34:19,440 --> 00:34:21,880
Speaker 3: I'm not the kind of person that loves to do that.

621
00:34:22,440 --> 00:34:24,840
Speaker 3: There's been times where I've done some like sort of

622
00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:29,480
Speaker 3: performative stuff like that, and I was just sort of

623
00:34:29,520 --> 00:34:32,000
Speaker 3: discovering who I was and trying to figure out what

624
00:34:32,040 --> 00:34:34,360
Speaker 3: I wanted to do. But I don't like doing stuff

625
00:34:34,400 --> 00:34:37,759
Speaker 3: like that, so I I yeah, I was face to

626
00:34:37,800 --> 00:34:42,360
Speaker 3: face with this person and they're just lovely, just a

627
00:34:42,480 --> 00:34:49,360
Speaker 3: human being who is fabulous and very likable and so yeah,

628
00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:52,800
Speaker 3: and that and that is my That's where I feel

629
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:59,240
Speaker 3: happy and satiated and comfortable is when there's closure between

630
00:35:00,320 --> 00:35:01,240
Speaker 3: me and that person.

631
00:35:01,800 --> 00:35:02,799
Speaker 2: So you had closure there.

632
00:35:03,440 --> 00:35:04,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's so.

633
00:35:06,360 --> 00:35:09,680
Speaker 1: This might sound crazy, I find that to be really

634
00:35:09,719 --> 00:35:12,840
Speaker 1: inspiring because I think in this world where we are

635
00:35:13,000 --> 00:35:15,000
Speaker 1: like a lot of us are are.

636
00:35:15,640 --> 00:35:18,799
Speaker 2: Prone to be people pleasers, especially in social age world

637
00:35:18,880 --> 00:35:23,920
Speaker 2: where perception or how we present is really important to

638
00:35:23,960 --> 00:35:27,759
Speaker 2: a lot of people. Yeah, it's like, if you know what.

639
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:35,040
Speaker 1: Your internal is doing, is it always necessary to lay

640
00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:37,759
Speaker 1: it out for people or have a performance piece to

641
00:35:37,840 --> 00:35:39,640
Speaker 1: kind of make people feel that.

642
00:35:39,760 --> 00:35:41,520
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's interesting, you don't have to.

643
00:35:41,560 --> 00:35:44,000
Speaker 3: But I think also those choices come from a place

644
00:35:44,160 --> 00:35:47,200
Speaker 3: that's not just like nonexistent. It comes from a place

645
00:35:47,239 --> 00:35:50,600
Speaker 3: of either you feel guilty, or you feel like you

646
00:35:50,680 --> 00:35:54,760
Speaker 3: need to fix something and you need to fix it fast,

647
00:35:55,160 --> 00:35:57,719
Speaker 3: or you know what I mean. Or it comes from

648
00:35:57,760 --> 00:36:01,880
Speaker 3: a place of possibly insecurity when somebody is like I

649
00:36:01,920 --> 00:36:04,879
Speaker 3: need people to know that the you know, and and

650
00:36:05,200 --> 00:36:12,000
Speaker 3: insecurity is human, and being unsure is human, and being

651
00:36:12,040 --> 00:36:16,600
Speaker 3: scared is human. It's just how you how you navigate

652
00:36:16,719 --> 00:36:19,360
Speaker 3: and and how much you're keeping up with it and

653
00:36:20,520 --> 00:36:24,720
Speaker 3: being consistent. So sometimes it's hard to be You can't

654
00:36:25,000 --> 00:36:27,560
Speaker 3: work out every single day of your entire life for

655
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:30,879
Speaker 3: the rest of your life. But if you get enough

656
00:36:30,880 --> 00:36:33,799
Speaker 3: of it, then you'll be great and you'll feel beautiful.

657
00:36:34,239 --> 00:36:36,799
Speaker 1: Do you ever feel I was thinking with something else

658
00:36:36,840 --> 00:36:39,640
Speaker 1: that I had heard somebody say about you or underline

659
00:36:39,760 --> 00:36:40,640
Speaker 1: something stuff online.

660
00:36:40,920 --> 00:36:45,239
Speaker 2: It's like they're a miss. It's a misconception that any misconception.

661
00:36:45,320 --> 00:36:47,359
Speaker 2: I just wonder, do you ever want to clean those up?

662
00:36:47,480 --> 00:36:52,600
Speaker 1: Like somebody sees some some different image imagery and then

663
00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:56,680
Speaker 1: somebody who works in the store thinks you worship the death.

664
00:36:58,480 --> 00:37:01,560
Speaker 2: Is it inside you to ever clear something that like

665
00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:03,600
Speaker 2: that up? Or you just kind of let that be

666
00:37:04,880 --> 00:37:06,960
Speaker 2: faster in the world as does it wants to.

667
00:37:07,200 --> 00:37:11,080
Speaker 3: I think about it a lot. I think about it

668
00:37:11,120 --> 00:37:15,120
Speaker 3: almost every day. What part of it, it's every single part,

669
00:37:15,360 --> 00:37:19,319
Speaker 3: every time, every pinpoint of when that's happened to me

670
00:37:19,400 --> 00:37:23,560
Speaker 3: down my career. It's happened a lot, and I think

671
00:37:25,960 --> 00:37:34,839
Speaker 3: it's not for me to prove to people who cannot

672
00:37:36,440 --> 00:37:43,440
Speaker 3: or don't wish to listen. It's the harsh reality. But

673
00:37:43,520 --> 00:37:48,920
Speaker 3: I'd like to stay there, and I feel comfortable there

674
00:37:49,520 --> 00:37:57,479
Speaker 3: because there's so many other great things happening that I can,

675
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:02,480
Speaker 3: instead of ruminating, can choose to express maybe the way

676
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:07,239
Speaker 3: I feel about that thing with music, or with an

677
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:11,880
Speaker 3: outfit or a painting or with something. Being creative is

678
00:38:11,960 --> 00:38:19,239
Speaker 3: really a good outlet for addressing to me personally. But

679
00:38:20,600 --> 00:38:24,680
Speaker 3: unless somebody asks all the beautiful questions the way you do,

680
00:38:25,320 --> 00:38:28,359
Speaker 3: I mean, then maybe I can discuss it. But I

681
00:38:28,360 --> 00:38:31,160
Speaker 3: also don't want to. I don't ever want to say

682
00:38:31,200 --> 00:38:33,440
Speaker 3: something that and I can't. I'm telling you like in

683
00:38:33,480 --> 00:38:36,799
Speaker 3: the past, I could not talk. I still honestly am

684
00:38:36,880 --> 00:38:37,640
Speaker 3: learning how to talk.

685
00:38:37,760 --> 00:38:40,080
Speaker 2: You're wonderful that sometimes I can.

686
00:38:40,000 --> 00:38:42,319
Speaker 3: Talk really well. But there's times where if I have

687
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:44,840
Speaker 3: a camera on me and there's like a person who's

688
00:38:44,880 --> 00:38:47,080
Speaker 3: talking to me and I'm distracted by something, or if

689
00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:49,200
Speaker 3: I had a bad day or something like all the

690
00:38:49,239 --> 00:38:53,520
Speaker 3: things in the biome have to fall together correctly or

691
00:38:53,520 --> 00:38:57,279
Speaker 3: else I can't. I can't speak the way that I

692
00:38:57,320 --> 00:38:59,120
Speaker 3: wish I spoke, Like when I'm laying in bed with

693
00:38:59,160 --> 00:39:01,120
Speaker 3: the lights off and I'm like thinking, and I'm like,

694
00:39:01,200 --> 00:39:02,120
Speaker 3: damn said that.

695
00:39:02,960 --> 00:39:08,879
Speaker 2: You know I killed that ship he's so smart say

696
00:39:08,960 --> 00:39:14,800
Speaker 2: this is exactly what, exactly what you mean. It happens

697
00:39:14,840 --> 00:39:17,600
Speaker 2: so much, and I say it like that.

698
00:39:17,640 --> 00:39:18,920
Speaker 1: I don't always say it the way I want to

699
00:39:18,960 --> 00:39:20,799
Speaker 1: say it, even when I have a guest you're coming

700
00:39:20,800 --> 00:39:22,560
Speaker 1: in and it's like, oh, don't there's so many things

701
00:39:22,560 --> 00:39:23,680
Speaker 1: I want to say, so many.

702
00:39:23,480 --> 00:39:25,319
Speaker 2: Things I want to ask her. But then you get in.

703
00:39:25,280 --> 00:39:28,440
Speaker 3: The chair and you're like, yeah, so this is but

704
00:39:28,560 --> 00:39:31,399
Speaker 3: this is like a great environment. I don't know why

705
00:39:32,120 --> 00:39:33,480
Speaker 3: I love you and it's great.

706
00:39:33,440 --> 00:39:35,399
Speaker 2: So I'll take it. I'll take it.

707
00:39:35,480 --> 00:39:40,160
Speaker 3: So it's it's like, uh, yeah, I think I could

708
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:43,040
Speaker 3: talk about those things everything.

709
00:39:43,400 --> 00:39:46,719
Speaker 1: I have one question about these things because when you

710
00:39:46,760 --> 00:39:49,719
Speaker 1: talk about that specifically, because I didn't hear somebody say

711
00:39:49,960 --> 00:39:51,600
Speaker 1: she worships the devil, I was like, what are you

712
00:39:51,640 --> 00:39:52,320
Speaker 1: talking about?

713
00:39:52,719 --> 00:39:54,279
Speaker 2: This one does not equal.

714
00:39:54,040 --> 00:39:58,799
Speaker 1: To However, I am curious about what is your relationship

715
00:39:58,840 --> 00:39:59,239
Speaker 1: with God?

716
00:39:59,320 --> 00:39:59,800
Speaker 2: Religion.

717
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:03,839
Speaker 3: I believe in a higher power. I believe that there's

718
00:40:03,960 --> 00:40:05,080
Speaker 3: something going on.

719
00:40:06,040 --> 00:40:17,800
Speaker 9: I don't know what, and I don't want to question it.

720
00:40:18,040 --> 00:40:22,319
Speaker 3: I don't follow any formula of any sort of traditional thing.

721
00:40:22,400 --> 00:40:27,439
Speaker 3: I mean, I celebrate Christmas, but like.

722
00:40:27,800 --> 00:40:28,960
Speaker 2: In a non traditional way.

723
00:40:29,040 --> 00:40:33,919
Speaker 3: In traditional way, but like, yeah, I think it also

724
00:40:34,120 --> 00:40:40,919
Speaker 3: does a massive good for me to believe that there

725
00:40:41,000 --> 00:40:44,760
Speaker 3: is something bigger than myself, because that's where you get lost.

726
00:40:45,880 --> 00:40:48,279
Speaker 2: It's really surprising to me that you that you're not.

727
00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:52,880
Speaker 1: Because you're so thoughtful in how you operate in the

728
00:40:52,920 --> 00:40:55,240
Speaker 1: world and it does so much work on yourself, and.

729
00:40:56,920 --> 00:40:58,960
Speaker 2: I don't know, it just surprises me that you haven't

730
00:40:59,120 --> 00:41:04,880
Speaker 2: narrowed down your connection to spirituality, God whatever.

731
00:41:05,040 --> 00:41:08,160
Speaker 3: To a lifelong process it really is. I think it's

732
00:41:08,239 --> 00:41:13,400
Speaker 3: just a learning a learning process I've had. I've actually

733
00:41:14,400 --> 00:41:21,320
Speaker 3: I've had issues with things like like drinking and things

734
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:27,000
Speaker 3: like that, and that that's sort of those two things

735
00:41:27,200 --> 00:41:32,120
Speaker 3: are in the same park for me because it's like,

736
00:41:32,280 --> 00:41:37,200
Speaker 3: if I don't believe that there's something bigger, then I'm

737
00:41:37,239 --> 00:41:42,799
Speaker 3: always going to fall to here. And I think sometimes

738
00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:47,120
Speaker 3: on impulse, maybe if I'm celebrating. I know it always

739
00:41:47,120 --> 00:41:50,799
Speaker 3: gets messy when I celebrate, but it's been a very

740
00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:56,680
Speaker 3: long time since I've been like like sad, like, oh God,

741
00:41:56,760 --> 00:41:59,360
Speaker 3: I need a glass of wine sort of sad. So

742
00:42:01,040 --> 00:42:08,560
Speaker 3: what else? And it happens, And I mean, but.

743
00:42:06,960 --> 00:42:10,560
Speaker 1: By the way, I also couldn't you're giving the gloves

744
00:42:10,600 --> 00:42:17,080
Speaker 1: and the gloves makes me feel so.

745
00:42:15,040 --> 00:42:20,480
Speaker 3: I just I just feel like you know, no, I

746
00:42:20,480 --> 00:42:27,719
Speaker 3: I yeah.

747
00:42:24,760 --> 00:42:26,759
Speaker 2: There is a there is a There is a question

748
00:42:26,800 --> 00:42:29,799
Speaker 2: in that bowl that says, if God were to text

749
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:34,840
Speaker 2: you right now, what would it say in your mind?

750
00:42:35,840 --> 00:42:38,920
Speaker 2: I mean even that it's good. I love that.

751
00:42:39,600 --> 00:42:46,560
Speaker 3: Uh. He would probably say you're doing You're doing great.

752
00:42:48,520 --> 00:42:53,040
Speaker 3: He'd be like he go, he go wow h And

753
00:42:53,160 --> 00:42:59,800
Speaker 3: he'd also go be careful mm hmmm l O L No,

754
00:43:01,120 --> 00:43:06,120
Speaker 3: he'd go be careful idiot l L Yeah, and he'd go, wow,

755
00:43:06,200 --> 00:43:06,640
Speaker 3: good job.

756
00:43:06,680 --> 00:43:06,879
Speaker 2: Though.

757
00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:08,680
Speaker 3: That sums nice.

758
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:12,480
Speaker 2: That's a great text. You should save that somewhere in

759
00:43:12,520 --> 00:43:13,160
Speaker 2: your phone.

760
00:43:13,160 --> 00:43:14,480
Speaker 3: That question is brilliant.

761
00:43:14,600 --> 00:43:17,600
Speaker 2: Oh thank you? What do you What do you have

762
00:43:17,680 --> 00:43:18,440
Speaker 2: to be careful of?

763
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:19,239
Speaker 1: Right now?

764
00:43:20,480 --> 00:43:23,839
Speaker 2: I think like a what waters are you?

765
00:43:25,239 --> 00:43:29,360
Speaker 3: I think like a just impulses again, like I know

766
00:43:29,520 --> 00:43:32,479
Speaker 3: a lot now and it's it's helped me like move

767
00:43:32,560 --> 00:43:35,680
Speaker 3: forward and in ways that like like I've been a

768
00:43:35,719 --> 00:43:38,680
Speaker 3: lot more. Even if you if you ask my fans

769
00:43:38,760 --> 00:43:43,319
Speaker 3: like they it's funny because they'll they'll compare Scarlet to

770
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:46,800
Speaker 3: be and the eras and the way that I spoke

771
00:43:47,080 --> 00:43:50,000
Speaker 3: during Scarlet. There's one specific one I know if I

772
00:43:50,040 --> 00:43:52,960
Speaker 3: can remember, but I said something like, if you don't

773
00:43:53,000 --> 00:43:56,640
Speaker 3: like my album cover, fuck you, it's amazing and you

774
00:43:56,640 --> 00:43:58,279
Speaker 3: can eat a dick like something like that.

775
00:43:58,320 --> 00:43:58,640
Speaker 2: Nice.

776
00:43:58,920 --> 00:44:02,359
Speaker 3: And then when I was talking about like like V

777
00:44:02,440 --> 00:44:04,640
Speaker 3: and everything, I was like, you, guys, V is an

778
00:44:04,640 --> 00:44:07,360
Speaker 3: album about blah blah blah blah blah, and this is

779
00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:10,319
Speaker 3: my album cover and this is why this means a

780
00:44:10,320 --> 00:44:10,759
Speaker 3: lot to me.

781
00:44:10,960 --> 00:44:14,399
Speaker 2: And so it's kind of like two different worlds. Yeah,

782
00:44:14,400 --> 00:44:17,200
Speaker 2: and the gloves really go. Yeah, I feel like you

783
00:44:17,239 --> 00:44:18,759
Speaker 2: should wear these different.

784
00:44:18,560 --> 00:44:20,600
Speaker 3: Verdi and see if I can get two more colors.

785
00:44:20,640 --> 00:44:24,120
Speaker 1: Spread definitely get more colors. Yeah, okay, face, I have

786
00:44:24,200 --> 00:44:27,040
Speaker 1: some in real life in my own Number one in

787
00:44:27,120 --> 00:44:31,319
Speaker 1: real life? What are you proudest of yourself for?

788
00:44:31,719 --> 00:44:37,800
Speaker 3: I'm most most proud of. I'm most proud of my growth.

789
00:44:39,239 --> 00:44:44,240
Speaker 3: I think I'm most proud of like like I was like, damn,

790
00:44:44,280 --> 00:44:48,520
Speaker 3: i hate going to vocal lessons and and I'm trying

791
00:44:48,520 --> 00:44:50,800
Speaker 3: to figure out a way around the puzzle of making

792
00:44:50,840 --> 00:44:55,200
Speaker 3: it like fun to do. And then I got there

793
00:44:55,640 --> 00:44:57,799
Speaker 3: and now I'm doing it, and then my voice got

794
00:44:57,840 --> 00:45:02,239
Speaker 3: better and I'm proud of that growth. That's more specific,

795
00:45:02,360 --> 00:45:04,680
Speaker 3: but I'm proud of my growth I'm proud of my

796
00:45:05,000 --> 00:45:10,840
Speaker 3: of the way I've I've given care and love to

797
00:45:10,920 --> 00:45:11,640
Speaker 3: my instrument.

798
00:45:11,960 --> 00:45:13,560
Speaker 1: I could see how much you care about it, like

799
00:45:13,640 --> 00:45:16,120
Speaker 1: every I guess everybody can, how much effort and stuff.

800
00:45:16,160 --> 00:45:18,080
Speaker 1: Even the other day, I was telling you, I saw

801
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:21,320
Speaker 1: the video of you talking about Scissa's vocals.

802
00:45:23,640 --> 00:45:27,120
Speaker 2: Still bring it brought you to tears? Yeah, what was happening?

803
00:45:27,160 --> 00:45:32,080
Speaker 7: It's like she really like cares about this and was it?

804
00:45:32,120 --> 00:45:34,920
Speaker 7: Is it Sissa or was it the music or was it? Well,

805
00:45:36,360 --> 00:45:40,799
Speaker 7: why do you have to ask me this? No, no, no,

806
00:45:40,800 --> 00:45:41,480
Speaker 7: it's a good question.

807
00:45:41,560 --> 00:45:41,880
Speaker 2: Thank you.

808
00:45:45,080 --> 00:45:52,279
Speaker 3: So Siss's voice for me personally, there's something she has

809
00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:57,720
Speaker 3: I think it's just stylistically for me. But then also

810
00:45:57,880 --> 00:46:01,960
Speaker 3: everything she's done on her on her own, sorry, everything

811
00:46:02,000 --> 00:46:06,000
Speaker 3: she's done on her own has been absolutely it's like

812
00:46:06,360 --> 00:46:09,919
Speaker 3: it's in she's created a new thing, and it's inspiring

813
00:46:10,320 --> 00:46:15,600
Speaker 3: for me and to hear her on my music and

814
00:46:15,600 --> 00:46:19,320
Speaker 3: and the way that her voice intertwines with the selection

815
00:46:19,440 --> 00:46:21,960
Speaker 3: that I've made for the beats and just the way

816
00:46:21,960 --> 00:46:28,399
Speaker 3: the production falls. She's always fell perfectly into place and

817
00:46:28,800 --> 00:46:34,080
Speaker 3: also has kind of given my work a new form

818
00:46:34,120 --> 00:46:39,200
Speaker 3: of life or like a different glow that I didn't

819
00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:44,680
Speaker 3: see before. And when I hear her voice, which when

820
00:46:44,680 --> 00:46:48,799
Speaker 3: I imagine it really even though yeah, when I think

821
00:46:48,800 --> 00:46:50,880
Speaker 3: about it, I like hear it in my head and

822
00:46:51,360 --> 00:46:57,120
Speaker 3: it's like very powerful for me. And uh so I

823
00:46:57,480 --> 00:47:04,960
Speaker 3: just am very uh thankful for for what she's given

824
00:47:05,200 --> 00:47:08,560
Speaker 3: to my projects in the past and now, and like

825
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:10,919
Speaker 3: she gets it.

826
00:47:11,360 --> 00:47:12,319
Speaker 2: Have you said that to her?

827
00:47:12,400 --> 00:47:17,080
Speaker 3: I I texted her a few times recently, but I mean,

828
00:47:17,200 --> 00:47:18,880
Speaker 3: I want to tell her this more often. I just

829
00:47:18,880 --> 00:47:19,760
Speaker 3: don't want to be weird.

830
00:47:22,040 --> 00:47:24,000
Speaker 2: I don't want to I don't want to be a freak.

831
00:47:24,600 --> 00:47:27,480
Speaker 3: But yeah, I mean I always I think about it

832
00:47:27,520 --> 00:47:29,759
Speaker 3: and I want to say something. I just I said it,

833
00:47:29,800 --> 00:47:32,680
Speaker 3: and so I want to just be be chill. I

834
00:47:32,680 --> 00:47:35,400
Speaker 3: think we're both like very shy, and so it's hard

835
00:47:35,480 --> 00:47:39,440
Speaker 3: to kind of connect deeper. I think we are very

836
00:47:39,480 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 3: like It's it takes a lot to like be very

837
00:47:43,920 --> 00:47:46,919
Speaker 3: very close with somebody and then also work with them.

838
00:47:47,040 --> 00:47:49,200
Speaker 3: You want to you want to balance it so that

839
00:47:49,280 --> 00:47:53,640
Speaker 3: things don't get, you know, off balanced.

840
00:47:53,800 --> 00:47:56,440
Speaker 2: But yeah, that is so sweet.

841
00:47:56,480 --> 00:48:01,799
Speaker 1: Though I love her, No, I clearly, and I'm sure

842
00:48:01,920 --> 00:48:02,440
Speaker 1: she knows.

843
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:04,760
Speaker 2: Who else do you love like that? The other artists

844
00:48:04,880 --> 00:48:07,759
Speaker 2: litter or Is that a rare, kind of rare experience

845
00:48:07,800 --> 00:48:08,040
Speaker 2: for you.

846
00:48:08,360 --> 00:48:11,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, the reaction. There's other artists that I feel that

847
00:48:11,120 --> 00:48:15,520
Speaker 3: way about, but not with Sizza because she's collaborated with her.

848
00:48:15,520 --> 00:48:16,520
Speaker 3: But there's artists.

849
00:48:16,360 --> 00:48:18,960
Speaker 1: Awards you've got and you won an award with her

850
00:48:19,080 --> 00:48:20,520
Speaker 1: and you've had success with her.

851
00:48:20,680 --> 00:48:22,640
Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, Yeah.

852
00:48:23,080 --> 00:48:26,279
Speaker 3: Goga is another one that that does that to me.

853
00:48:28,160 --> 00:48:31,759
Speaker 3: I went to see her live recently and me and

854
00:48:32,280 --> 00:48:37,719
Speaker 3: my creative director, Brett we were we were like, I

855
00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:40,120
Speaker 3: was sobbing and he I think he was all you

856
00:48:40,360 --> 00:48:45,399
Speaker 3: were you also sobbing with his mouth was hanging open

857
00:48:45,440 --> 00:48:49,000
Speaker 3: and he was like screaming crying. I was also and

858
00:48:49,440 --> 00:48:49,960
Speaker 3: what is that?

859
00:48:50,000 --> 00:48:58,000
Speaker 2: Though? What is what? It's? Why can you explain that?

860
00:48:59,120 --> 00:49:01,080
Speaker 3: You know what? That's why it makes me cry so

861
00:49:01,200 --> 00:49:04,200
Speaker 3: much because I can't explain it. All I can really

862
00:49:04,239 --> 00:49:12,759
Speaker 3: tell you is that I am absolutely inspired. I moved constantly,

863
00:49:14,680 --> 00:49:22,040
Speaker 3: and I'm proud and I'm just I'm so so happy

864
00:49:22,160 --> 00:49:26,799
Speaker 3: for where she's made it to and how and how

865
00:49:26,840 --> 00:49:33,719
Speaker 3: she orchestrates her creative and her voice is something that

866
00:49:34,040 --> 00:49:41,560
Speaker 3: is incredibly unique and just very very lovely to hear,

867
00:49:41,960 --> 00:49:46,160
Speaker 3: and I just am so I'm so so inspired by

868
00:49:46,200 --> 00:49:46,880
Speaker 3: her and her.

869
00:49:46,880 --> 00:49:50,239
Speaker 2: Also, I think the sobbing went on I would imagine for.

870
00:49:50,719 --> 00:49:54,319
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, well no yeah, I mean yeah, I cry

871
00:49:54,440 --> 00:49:58,080
Speaker 3: like that with yeah.

872
00:49:58,239 --> 00:50:00,799
Speaker 1: But it's so funny because I like such a hard

873
00:50:00,840 --> 00:50:02,880
Speaker 1: at the hard beds in.

874
00:50:04,520 --> 00:50:06,400
Speaker 2: Like a ball of bush in the other.

875
00:50:06,200 --> 00:50:08,160
Speaker 3: Ways, I know, I am, I know, and I don't

876
00:50:08,200 --> 00:50:10,239
Speaker 3: like to show that, but I should maybe, But I

877
00:50:10,280 --> 00:50:10,880
Speaker 3: have to show.

878
00:50:10,719 --> 00:50:12,360
Speaker 2: That it's the full picture. You can't just show a

879
00:50:12,360 --> 00:50:13,840
Speaker 2: little piece of the picture, you know.

880
00:50:15,160 --> 00:50:23,319
Speaker 3: She she uh The way that she treats people when

881
00:50:23,360 --> 00:50:27,160
Speaker 3: it comes to her fans, when it comes to just

882
00:50:27,239 --> 00:50:30,600
Speaker 3: people on the street, or really anybody. The way she talks,

883
00:50:31,200 --> 00:50:35,440
Speaker 3: it's very It's something that I wish to aspire to.

884
00:50:36,640 --> 00:50:40,080
Speaker 3: And I talk about that in therapy, and that's something

885
00:50:40,120 --> 00:50:44,279
Speaker 3: that I'm now everybody is gonna know. But she she

886
00:50:44,400 --> 00:50:52,240
Speaker 3: has a great heart, and I that's that's my favorite

887
00:50:52,280 --> 00:50:56,400
Speaker 3: thing about her. I think her music is fabulous. I

888
00:50:56,400 --> 00:50:59,200
Speaker 3: don't even really listen to her music that much. I'll

889
00:50:59,200 --> 00:51:02,480
Speaker 3: be honest, I don't. It's her as a it's it's

890
00:51:02,520 --> 00:51:07,160
Speaker 3: her as a person that draws me to her. But

891
00:51:07,239 --> 00:51:10,280
Speaker 3: the music is just a bonus. And so I really

892
00:51:10,440 --> 00:51:15,160
Speaker 3: am happy to be alive in a time seeing that.

893
00:51:15,719 --> 00:51:18,840
Speaker 1: Does it ever resonate for you that people feel the

894
00:51:19,040 --> 00:51:20,520
Speaker 1: same the same way about you?

895
00:51:22,160 --> 00:51:23,200
Speaker 3: I don't ever think about it.

896
00:51:25,200 --> 00:51:28,400
Speaker 1: There's somebody for sure that every one of these shows

897
00:51:28,440 --> 00:51:30,239
Speaker 1: you're about to have, there will be somebody in the

898
00:51:30,280 --> 00:51:33,160
Speaker 1: audience that will have that same reaction to you.

899
00:51:34,160 --> 00:51:39,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, maybe maybe.

900
00:51:39,440 --> 00:51:41,680
Speaker 2: How does that sit with it? Is that uncomfortable for you?

901
00:51:41,760 --> 00:51:43,960
Speaker 3: Or I don't know, I mean, I don't, I don't know.

902
00:51:45,040 --> 00:51:48,000
Speaker 3: I think I hope so I hope I can be

903
00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:51,879
Speaker 3: a positive influence for people. Yeah, when when I do

904
00:51:51,960 --> 00:51:54,520
Speaker 3: things that are positive, I hope that those are things

905
00:51:54,560 --> 00:51:56,480
Speaker 3: that influence people positively.

906
00:51:56,680 --> 00:51:58,680
Speaker 2: You know what's so interesting I had this thought you

907
00:51:58,719 --> 00:52:00,319
Speaker 2: were just talking now and I was like, Cose, she

908
00:52:00,360 --> 00:52:03,400
Speaker 2: really is like a mush she has like a soy side.

909
00:52:03,840 --> 00:52:05,279
Speaker 2: And then I think about the other side of that

910
00:52:05,360 --> 00:52:07,400
Speaker 2: we were talking about before. How you say what you

911
00:52:07,400 --> 00:52:09,120
Speaker 2: mean and you don't want to you know, there's certain

912
00:52:09,160 --> 00:52:10,160
Speaker 2: things you shouldn't have to do.

913
00:52:10,680 --> 00:52:14,760
Speaker 10: And then I wonder, if you were a man, would

914
00:52:14,760 --> 00:52:19,040
Speaker 10: it be expected for you to have to uh be

915
00:52:19,160 --> 00:52:21,640
Speaker 10: performed and been apologized on a remorse.

916
00:52:21,640 --> 00:52:23,400
Speaker 1: So, you know, like when I think about artists like

917
00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:26,719
Speaker 1: I don't know Rick James or you know, I don't know.

918
00:52:26,760 --> 00:52:28,680
Speaker 2: We're talking about that era and stuff like that. But

919
00:52:28,719 --> 00:52:31,440
Speaker 2: when you know, I'm just saying, there's so many men.

920
00:52:32,080 --> 00:52:34,440
Speaker 1: They get out there, they talk their ship, they're artists,

921
00:52:34,440 --> 00:52:38,440
Speaker 1: they're like I mean, Prince was notorious for but like.

922
00:52:38,400 --> 00:52:42,280
Speaker 2: Everybody's sit down, Yeah, get off my stage. You can't dance,

923
00:52:42,360 --> 00:52:45,120
Speaker 2: you know, like he was. He was a little ruthless

924
00:52:45,120 --> 00:52:46,080
Speaker 2: in that, in that type of way.

925
00:52:46,239 --> 00:52:51,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, but I think I wonder if more sensitivity expected

926
00:52:51,040 --> 00:52:53,200
Speaker 1: from you in general.

927
00:52:53,520 --> 00:52:54,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think.

928
00:52:54,239 --> 00:52:56,560
Speaker 3: I mean, also, that was such a different right, that

929
00:52:56,680 --> 00:52:59,960
Speaker 3: was a different time, so everybody couldn't put their opinion

930
00:53:00,560 --> 00:53:03,400
Speaker 3: right in front of your face, like, oh, just what

931
00:53:03,520 --> 00:53:06,160
Speaker 3: I think of you? You had they had to literally

932
00:53:06,239 --> 00:53:08,880
Speaker 3: find you physically.

933
00:53:09,120 --> 00:53:10,959
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you would have thrived in that time.

934
00:53:11,000 --> 00:53:14,680
Speaker 3: My god, I think that I might have. Yeah maybe,

935
00:53:16,480 --> 00:53:21,800
Speaker 3: but yeah, I think, like it's I like to I

936
00:53:21,800 --> 00:53:23,239
Speaker 3: don't know. I was sitting on the toilet the other

937
00:53:23,320 --> 00:53:29,240
Speaker 3: day and I thought, I was thinking, I'm not trying

938
00:53:29,239 --> 00:53:31,680
Speaker 3: to run for president. I just want to make music.

939
00:53:32,760 --> 00:53:36,080
Speaker 3: And I think a lot of people look at music

940
00:53:36,880 --> 00:53:43,760
Speaker 3: like this is a competitive sport. I also Verbatim saw somebody,

941
00:53:43,840 --> 00:53:46,759
Speaker 3: Like I saw someone write that they said, this is

942
00:53:46,760 --> 00:53:51,040
Speaker 3: a competitive sport. People better be ready, and I'm like,

943
00:53:52,920 --> 00:53:57,600
Speaker 3: but it's not. It's not that for everyone. What like

944
00:53:58,480 --> 00:54:01,960
Speaker 3: what this is like a it's like a spiritual thing

945
00:54:02,200 --> 00:54:04,560
Speaker 3: and not all the time. Maybe for some people it

946
00:54:04,640 --> 00:54:09,400
Speaker 3: is actually which is totally fine, that's totally fine, that's entertaining,

947
00:54:09,480 --> 00:54:10,120
Speaker 3: that's cool.

948
00:54:12,080 --> 00:54:12,839
Speaker 2: But I think it.

949
00:54:12,800 --> 00:54:15,719
Speaker 3: Starts to get blurred and people think that it's like

950
00:54:15,800 --> 00:54:19,080
Speaker 3: that for everyone, and that everybody's like trying like out

951
00:54:19,120 --> 00:54:21,760
Speaker 3: for each other and trying to like take each other down,

952
00:54:22,719 --> 00:54:29,280
Speaker 3: and like that there's panic and chaos everywhere and everyone

953
00:54:29,360 --> 00:54:33,920
Speaker 3: needs to be defensive and protect and like it's not

954
00:54:34,200 --> 00:54:37,319
Speaker 3: like that for everyone, and that I just want That's

955
00:54:37,320 --> 00:54:40,320
Speaker 3: something I think I want my fans to take away.

956
00:54:40,440 --> 00:54:42,960
Speaker 3: If there's any any of my my young fans who

957
00:54:43,000 --> 00:54:46,439
Speaker 3: like want to make music, I think a big one

958
00:54:46,560 --> 00:54:49,360
Speaker 3: is to know that, like it doesn't have to be

959
00:54:49,440 --> 00:54:52,160
Speaker 3: that way for you. You can you can just like make

960
00:54:52,280 --> 00:54:55,640
Speaker 3: music and like do whatever you want. You're good, Like

961
00:54:55,680 --> 00:54:59,920
Speaker 3: you don't You're you're not immediately associated with everyone just

962
00:55:00,080 --> 00:55:02,960
Speaker 3: because of this. That and the third you can just

963
00:55:03,040 --> 00:55:03,919
Speaker 3: be in your own thing.

964
00:55:04,080 --> 00:55:07,200
Speaker 2: Where do you like, or do you even think about that?

965
00:55:08,840 --> 00:55:12,200
Speaker 2: I don't know where is your life or you or

966
00:55:12,239 --> 00:55:14,480
Speaker 2: your or what you put in the world. Where do

967
00:55:14,520 --> 00:55:16,240
Speaker 2: you hope it lands with people?

968
00:55:16,480 --> 00:55:25,920
Speaker 3: I think like I think I want my fans to

969
00:55:26,080 --> 00:55:32,840
Speaker 3: feel like then everything is doesn't have to be so

970
00:55:32,960 --> 00:55:36,960
Speaker 3: streamlined and formulaic, and that you can really do whatever

971
00:55:37,000 --> 00:55:39,680
Speaker 3: you want and you don't have to be you know,

972
00:55:40,000 --> 00:55:46,000
Speaker 3: it's not up to other people to to tell you

973
00:55:46,040 --> 00:55:49,320
Speaker 3: how to express yourself. It's up to you. It feels

974
00:55:49,400 --> 00:55:53,840
Speaker 3: kind of like cliche, but I know, like in the past,

975
00:55:53,840 --> 00:55:57,040
Speaker 3: I've made a lot of albums that all the songs

976
00:55:57,040 --> 00:55:59,399
Speaker 3: sounded so different on them. There was really no kind

977
00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:02,759
Speaker 3: of consistent and see whatsoever. And I was like, oh,

978
00:56:02,800 --> 00:56:06,680
Speaker 3: I don't like that. And but I was like, I

979
00:56:06,760 --> 00:56:08,879
Speaker 3: like these songs individually, I just don't feel like it's

980
00:56:08,880 --> 00:56:12,120
Speaker 3: a consistent album. I've always felt like that. Really yeah.

981
00:56:12,160 --> 00:56:12,480
Speaker 2: Wow.

982
00:56:13,239 --> 00:56:15,560
Speaker 3: But Scarlett started to get a little more cohesive, but

983
00:56:15,600 --> 00:56:17,239
Speaker 3: not really even then, it was just like, what the

984
00:56:17,239 --> 00:56:20,640
Speaker 3: fuck is that. There's a lot of songs like sore thumthing,

985
00:56:20,680 --> 00:56:21,120
Speaker 3: they just.

986
00:56:21,040 --> 00:56:23,440
Speaker 2: Like sit out cohesive.

987
00:56:23,520 --> 00:56:28,400
Speaker 3: This was very cohesive for me, yes, in comparison, But

988
00:56:28,520 --> 00:56:30,280
Speaker 3: I think like I mean when it comes to music.

989
00:56:30,520 --> 00:56:34,440
Speaker 3: I hope that they take that away, that like music

990
00:56:34,560 --> 00:56:37,399
Speaker 3: is really just music. You can paint however you want

991
00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:40,760
Speaker 3: to paint, you can express however, you can design however

992
00:56:40,760 --> 00:56:43,880
Speaker 3: you want to design, and if it makes you happy,

993
00:56:43,920 --> 00:56:49,160
Speaker 3: that's kind of all that matters. And that's like literally,

994
00:56:49,200 --> 00:56:52,480
Speaker 3: that's that's the best I can and but but that

995
00:56:52,480 --> 00:56:56,400
Speaker 3: it does ring really true to me, So hopefully they

996
00:56:56,480 --> 00:56:59,399
Speaker 3: take that from it and also be weird, like you're

997
00:56:59,480 --> 00:57:01,799
Speaker 3: you're gonna be cringe whether you like it or not.

998
00:57:01,920 --> 00:57:05,000
Speaker 3: Probably to someone leant the weird the people who think

999
00:57:05,040 --> 00:57:07,360
Speaker 3: that they're not cringe and that they've got it all together,

1000
00:57:07,680 --> 00:57:10,719
Speaker 3: like there's a group of people looking at them, going ew,

1001
00:57:12,400 --> 00:57:14,320
Speaker 3: But they probably look back at that group of people

1002
00:57:14,320 --> 00:57:17,960
Speaker 3: and they're probably like so, like, at the end of

1003
00:57:17,960 --> 00:57:20,960
Speaker 3: the day, who cares. It doesn't matter. People are gonna

1004
00:57:20,960 --> 00:57:22,000
Speaker 3: think you're lame.

1005
00:57:22,600 --> 00:57:26,720
Speaker 2: What can somebody And that's okay. Somebody's gonna think you're

1006
00:57:26,800 --> 00:57:27,360
Speaker 2: like people.

1007
00:57:27,600 --> 00:57:30,920
Speaker 3: Multiple people are gonna be like you suck and you

1008
00:57:30,920 --> 00:57:32,320
Speaker 3: didn't even do anything wrong.

1009
00:57:35,040 --> 00:57:37,800
Speaker 2: You can do anything. I kind of wish I could

1010
00:57:37,880 --> 00:57:38,760
Speaker 2: do that more.

1011
00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:44,400
Speaker 1: How does somebody lean into their weird bag, like let

1012
00:57:44,480 --> 00:57:45,800
Speaker 1: your freak flag fly.

1013
00:57:46,160 --> 00:57:49,160
Speaker 3: Well, it's a development. I think that not not My

1014
00:57:49,280 --> 00:57:53,640
Speaker 3: weirdness isn't a development. It's something that uh I well

1015
00:57:53,680 --> 00:57:56,400
Speaker 3: maybe it was a development. Yeah, I think it's part

1016
00:57:56,440 --> 00:57:57,280
Speaker 3: of my weirdness.

1017
00:57:57,720 --> 00:57:59,080
Speaker 2: First of all, you're not weird.

1018
00:57:59,400 --> 00:58:04,080
Speaker 3: Yeah, well I'm definitely. I'm fucking kooky. I'm a little

1019
00:58:04,600 --> 00:58:07,680
Speaker 3: I'm so different, like I'm mad different.

1020
00:58:07,880 --> 00:58:11,320
Speaker 2: So but no.

1021
00:58:11,400 --> 00:58:16,040
Speaker 3: I I think that like, you don't have to be

1022
00:58:16,120 --> 00:58:20,960
Speaker 3: weird either. You can be totally not weird. You can

1023
00:58:21,080 --> 00:58:25,240
Speaker 3: just be whatever you want. I think it's like also subjective,

1024
00:58:25,440 --> 00:58:28,720
Speaker 3: like some someone might be like, that's weird that they're

1025
00:58:28,760 --> 00:58:32,880
Speaker 3: wearing head to toe Adidas, Like that doesn't like that

1026
00:58:32,920 --> 00:58:37,200
Speaker 3: person's weird to me. And then the person wearing the

1027
00:58:37,280 --> 00:58:43,120
Speaker 3: Adidas is looking at the person who's wearing Alo Nike,

1028
00:58:43,400 --> 00:58:47,760
Speaker 3: Adidas U Puma head to toe, and that person's like

1029
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:51,400
Speaker 3: they're they're like weird, They're like why would you mix

1030
00:58:51,480 --> 00:58:55,320
Speaker 3: all of that? But like that's a cute outfit, and

1031
00:58:55,320 --> 00:58:59,840
Speaker 3: so is that Yeah, that's intentional? So is that you know?

1032
00:59:00,960 --> 00:59:03,400
Speaker 3: So it's kind of like that's just how it is.

1033
00:59:03,680 --> 00:59:07,040
Speaker 3: I don't think to lean into your weirdness is to

1034
00:59:07,560 --> 00:59:15,400
Speaker 3: be trusting of your surroundings or or maybe comfortable, uh,

1035
00:59:16,320 --> 00:59:18,080
Speaker 3: trusting of yourself.

1036
00:59:20,040 --> 00:59:21,520
Speaker 2: Having fun, I would imagine.

1037
00:59:21,880 --> 00:59:25,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, I mean there's also bad weird, which we

1038
00:59:25,920 --> 00:59:28,080
Speaker 3: can discuss flapping.

1039
00:59:27,640 --> 00:59:28,080
Speaker 2: All the time.

1040
00:59:28,320 --> 00:59:33,080
Speaker 6: Yeah, I mean, yeah, that's weird definitely in real life.

1041
00:59:33,120 --> 00:59:36,760
Speaker 2: How often do you think about your legacy? Hm hmm,

1042
00:59:39,320 --> 00:59:41,840
Speaker 2: you are a legacy artist. I expect a good answer here.

1043
00:59:42,080 --> 00:59:46,080
Speaker 3: Once every three to four weeks. Really, yeah, what does

1044
00:59:46,120 --> 00:59:49,040
Speaker 3: it look like? What is the I'm like old and

1045
00:59:49,120 --> 00:59:53,600
Speaker 3: singing pretty good, and I'm like, I don't know. I'm like,

1046
00:59:53,840 --> 00:59:56,440
Speaker 3: I got a dog and a husband.

1047
00:59:57,120 --> 01:00:01,880
Speaker 2: Husband, yeah, maybe have kids. I don't know.

1048
01:00:02,400 --> 01:00:05,400
Speaker 3: Uh, this world is very scary. I don't know if

1049
01:00:05,400 --> 01:00:09,280
Speaker 3: i'd want to bring kids into this world. But you know,

1050
01:00:09,920 --> 01:00:14,640
Speaker 3: I think, uh yeah, my legacy.

1051
01:00:16,320 --> 01:00:17,720
Speaker 2: Oh no, I don't really think.

1052
01:00:17,760 --> 01:00:19,840
Speaker 3: I honestly, I don't think I really think about that.

1053
01:00:20,080 --> 01:00:20,400
Speaker 1: Really.

1054
01:00:20,520 --> 01:00:23,000
Speaker 3: I just see myself kind of old and round, and

1055
01:00:23,040 --> 01:00:25,560
Speaker 3: I'm like singing, I got im like a big fur coat.

1056
01:00:26,240 --> 01:00:27,080
Speaker 3: That's my legacy.

1057
01:00:27,360 --> 01:00:31,080
Speaker 1: You're gonna have great stories, thanks, Yeah, I'm gonna have

1058
01:00:31,160 --> 01:00:31,880
Speaker 1: great stories.

1059
01:00:31,920 --> 01:00:34,960
Speaker 2: Then the time when I and my whole team was

1060
01:00:35,480 --> 01:00:37,760
Speaker 2: freaking out because I did or whatever, I have.

1061
01:00:37,680 --> 01:00:42,080
Speaker 1: Good stories now, I bet. I bet you're gonna have

1062
01:00:42,120 --> 01:00:44,520
Speaker 1: amazing stories after this tour. I have them great time

1063
01:00:44,600 --> 01:00:47,800
Speaker 1: on tour. It's gonna be so exciting. Thank you anything.

1064
01:00:48,000 --> 01:00:50,280
Speaker 2: We should leave the people with what what should they know?

1065
01:00:50,280 --> 01:00:52,520
Speaker 2: What should they expect?

1066
01:00:52,600 --> 01:00:59,240
Speaker 3: I mean, I start tour for Asia Australia in November,

1067
01:01:01,360 --> 01:01:05,560
Speaker 3: and then I'm out there for a little bit, and

1068
01:01:05,600 --> 01:01:08,400
Speaker 3: then I come back, I do my US tour. I'm

1069
01:01:08,440 --> 01:01:11,840
Speaker 3: touring till December of next year.

1070
01:01:12,640 --> 01:01:16,840
Speaker 2: Shit. Oh yeah, and therapy twice a week still happens.

1071
01:01:16,960 --> 01:01:19,520
Speaker 2: Oh yeah.

1072
01:01:19,880 --> 01:01:21,600
Speaker 1: And I'm sure somebody will be in the crowd and

1073
01:01:21,640 --> 01:01:23,960
Speaker 1: be as moved by you as you are. Thank you

1074
01:01:24,000 --> 01:01:26,640
Speaker 1: by your favorite Thank you, and you're wonderful today.

1075
01:01:26,640 --> 01:01:27,439
Speaker 2: Thank you so much.

1076
01:01:27,760 --> 01:01:32,000
Speaker 10: Soljakai in real life.

1077
01:01:33,280 --> 01:01:35,080
Speaker 3: This is Dojacat in real life.

1078
01:01:36,040 --> 01:01:37,120
Speaker 2: Hey guys, thanks for watching.

1079
01:01:37,160 --> 01:01:40,600
Speaker 1: Make sure you subscribe, like comments, and check out all

1080
01:01:40,600 --> 01:01:42,240
Speaker 1: of the other episodes we have on Edge.

1081
01:01:42,280 --> 01:01:43,680
Speaker 2: Martinez Irl Podcast