1 00:00:05,519 --> 00:00:05,600 Speaker 1: Hi. 2 00:00:05,559 --> 00:00:08,360 Speaker 2: I am Kate Hudson and my name is Oliver Hudson. 3 00:00:08,520 --> 00:00:11,200 Speaker 3: We wanted to do something that highlighted our. 4 00:00:11,119 --> 00:00:19,480 Speaker 2: Relationship and what it's like to be siblings. We are 5 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:21,040 Speaker 2: a sibling. Railvalry. 6 00:00:21,760 --> 00:00:32,000 Speaker 4: No, no, sibling. You don't do that with your mouth, revelry. 7 00:00:33,680 --> 00:00:40,560 Speaker 5: That's good, Oliver. I'm very excited about today's guest. Do 8 00:00:40,560 --> 00:00:41,240 Speaker 5: you want to know why? 9 00:00:41,400 --> 00:00:43,360 Speaker 2: Well, you're in New York first of all, and I'm 10 00:00:43,360 --> 00:00:45,080 Speaker 2: in la I know. 11 00:00:45,200 --> 00:00:51,200 Speaker 5: And actually this was a very challenging scheduling situation. 12 00:00:52,360 --> 00:00:52,720 Speaker 1: Today. 13 00:00:52,760 --> 00:00:53,560 Speaker 2: For some reason. 14 00:00:53,760 --> 00:00:56,639 Speaker 5: It was totally chaotic and it was like, no, it's 15 00:00:56,680 --> 00:00:57,280 Speaker 5: a two o'clock. 16 00:00:57,280 --> 00:00:57,959 Speaker 3: I was on this. 17 00:00:58,280 --> 00:01:01,000 Speaker 5: I was ready at two for this inner and Iver's like, no, 18 00:01:01,040 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 5: it's a five Eastern time. And then you're like, what 19 00:01:03,920 --> 00:01:05,200 Speaker 5: twelve thirty and I'm like. 20 00:01:05,840 --> 00:01:09,120 Speaker 2: Four, woke up. I woke up at three am just 21 00:01:09,200 --> 00:01:10,680 Speaker 2: to sort of make sure I was going to get 22 00:01:10,680 --> 00:01:15,399 Speaker 2: it all right. But we're weird. We made it. We 23 00:01:15,480 --> 00:01:16,800 Speaker 2: made it. We're here, we made it. 24 00:01:17,080 --> 00:01:21,880 Speaker 5: I'm excited because I am a huge Dancing with the 25 00:01:21,920 --> 00:01:26,400 Speaker 5: Stars fan. As you know, I also have friends Derek 26 00:01:26,400 --> 00:01:28,959 Speaker 5: and Jules who are friends of mine, who are you know, 27 00:01:29,120 --> 00:01:29,679 Speaker 5: have been on that. 28 00:01:29,640 --> 00:01:30,800 Speaker 3: Show for years and years. 29 00:01:30,959 --> 00:01:36,399 Speaker 5: So our this guest for me, Cheryl, Cheryl Burke is 30 00:01:36,400 --> 00:01:38,920 Speaker 5: someone I've always loved to watch. I think she's an 31 00:01:38,920 --> 00:01:43,360 Speaker 5: incredible dancer and a wonderful choreographer. 32 00:01:44,360 --> 00:01:45,600 Speaker 3: And very emotional. 33 00:01:46,280 --> 00:01:47,680 Speaker 5: So I like, I feel like I know her, But 34 00:01:47,720 --> 00:01:51,960 Speaker 5: I'm really excited to interview her talking about crazy sibling situation. 35 00:01:52,360 --> 00:01:54,120 Speaker 2: I know, I think she's in the lobby right now waiting, 36 00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:56,040 Speaker 2: but before we get there, you know, I think they've 37 00:01:56,080 --> 00:01:58,640 Speaker 2: asked me to do Dancing with the Stars a couple 38 00:01:58,680 --> 00:01:59,120 Speaker 2: of times. 39 00:01:59,400 --> 00:02:01,400 Speaker 3: Oh my gosh, Cheryl could have been your partner. 40 00:02:02,560 --> 00:02:05,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, but I'm too scared. I don't want to do 41 00:02:05,520 --> 00:02:07,440 Speaker 2: I can't do it, you know what I mean. Like, 42 00:02:07,520 --> 00:02:08,960 Speaker 2: it's not I'm not there yet. 43 00:02:09,280 --> 00:02:11,520 Speaker 3: I bet you would love it. You'd like cry about 44 00:02:11,560 --> 00:02:14,000 Speaker 3: being abandoned. It would be it would be. 45 00:02:16,080 --> 00:02:21,040 Speaker 2: Interpretive like this dance. This dance it's called. 46 00:02:23,800 --> 00:02:26,760 Speaker 5: It's an interpretation of when my father left me on 47 00:02:26,840 --> 00:02:27,519 Speaker 5: the steps. 48 00:02:29,880 --> 00:02:32,120 Speaker 2: It's called lonely leather suitcase. 49 00:02:37,840 --> 00:02:45,800 Speaker 3: You just like you just like sit there so cry. Okay, 50 00:02:46,360 --> 00:02:48,959 Speaker 3: let's not leave Cheryl. Let's not leave Cheryl. 51 00:02:48,680 --> 00:02:50,480 Speaker 5: In the in the in the waiting room here for 52 00:02:50,520 --> 00:02:53,240 Speaker 5: too long but I love you Allie, and I love 53 00:02:53,280 --> 00:02:53,520 Speaker 5: it too. 54 00:02:56,040 --> 00:02:56,200 Speaker 1: Hi. 55 00:02:57,960 --> 00:03:01,440 Speaker 3: Hi, pretty Hi? 56 00:03:01,520 --> 00:03:02,160 Speaker 1: How's it going? 57 00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:03,520 Speaker 3: You look gorgeous? 58 00:03:03,720 --> 00:03:05,440 Speaker 1: How's it going good? 59 00:03:06,000 --> 00:03:06,160 Speaker 6: You know? 60 00:03:06,240 --> 00:03:08,120 Speaker 1: Leve me? The podcast dream? 61 00:03:08,800 --> 00:03:11,280 Speaker 5: Yeah, that's what it is these days, isn't it? So 62 00:03:11,360 --> 00:03:12,959 Speaker 5: many podcasts dreams. 63 00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:16,080 Speaker 1: Sobody, so many, and just so many in general. 64 00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:18,320 Speaker 3: I know, But I love a pod. 65 00:03:18,360 --> 00:03:20,400 Speaker 2: I love a good Well. When when we first got 66 00:03:20,400 --> 00:03:22,840 Speaker 2: into the game, they were like, oh my god, there's 67 00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:26,840 Speaker 2: nine hundred thousand podcasts, we were like, holy shit, now 68 00:03:26,880 --> 00:03:28,880 Speaker 2: there's like six million. 69 00:03:29,000 --> 00:03:31,399 Speaker 1: Exactly, exactly exactly. 70 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,000 Speaker 5: Well, we love it, We love we love talking and 71 00:03:34,600 --> 00:03:39,600 Speaker 5: obviously because we started this whole podcast about really about 72 00:03:39,600 --> 00:03:42,640 Speaker 5: the sibling relationship, it's so fun because we get to 73 00:03:42,640 --> 00:03:45,240 Speaker 5: talk to people about things that we don't usually get 74 00:03:45,280 --> 00:03:46,200 Speaker 5: to talk about, you know. 75 00:03:46,280 --> 00:03:48,360 Speaker 1: Right, yeah, no, totally. I was thinking like should I 76 00:03:48,400 --> 00:03:50,400 Speaker 1: have done this with my sister? But then I was like, uh, 77 00:03:50,640 --> 00:03:52,840 Speaker 1: we've got like a nine year age gap my half sister. 78 00:03:53,200 --> 00:03:56,960 Speaker 1: My life is complicated, as you're about to hear, but uh, yeah, 79 00:03:57,000 --> 00:03:59,480 Speaker 1: it's it's an interesting dynamic. But I've heard a couple 80 00:03:59,480 --> 00:04:01,600 Speaker 1: of episodes and you guys seem to just nail it 81 00:04:01,680 --> 00:04:03,240 Speaker 1: so well. 82 00:04:03,320 --> 00:04:04,960 Speaker 5: We have fun we try to keep it light on 83 00:04:05,000 --> 00:04:08,680 Speaker 5: its feet, yeah, until Oliver and I start crying, until 84 00:04:08,720 --> 00:04:09,480 Speaker 5: it gets heavy. 85 00:04:09,920 --> 00:04:12,600 Speaker 1: Crying is not a bad thing though, right no, yeah, 86 00:04:12,840 --> 00:04:14,520 Speaker 1: you know we run all the emotion. 87 00:04:14,640 --> 00:04:16,919 Speaker 2: We run through gamut of all emotions on this show, 88 00:04:17,320 --> 00:04:21,600 Speaker 2: you know, from the completely absurd to in a puddle 89 00:04:21,600 --> 00:04:22,520 Speaker 2: of tears. 90 00:04:22,440 --> 00:04:26,440 Speaker 5: Right right, right, Well real life, Cheryl, I was saying 91 00:04:26,520 --> 00:04:28,839 Speaker 5: before you got on that I'm I'm obviously such a 92 00:04:28,920 --> 00:04:30,960 Speaker 5: huge dancer with the storys Fance. I feel like I 93 00:04:31,040 --> 00:04:33,520 Speaker 5: know you because you were on for so many years. Yes, 94 00:04:34,960 --> 00:04:37,000 Speaker 5: just have to tell you. I think you're incredible and 95 00:04:37,040 --> 00:04:40,400 Speaker 5: you're an amazing choreographer, and your thank you always moved me. 96 00:04:40,960 --> 00:04:43,640 Speaker 1: Thanks so much, I can't believe what I mean. Obviously, 97 00:04:43,680 --> 00:04:46,640 Speaker 1: I know that you and Derek are friends, so you know, 98 00:04:46,760 --> 00:04:50,039 Speaker 1: maybe that's the connection. But that's awesome. And Joels the whole, 99 00:04:50,160 --> 00:04:50,839 Speaker 1: the whole. 100 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:51,680 Speaker 3: Huff the whole. 101 00:04:52,360 --> 00:04:55,680 Speaker 5: They're taking over the world, those huffs, Oh my gosh, 102 00:04:55,760 --> 00:04:56,680 Speaker 5: I just love them. 103 00:04:56,880 --> 00:04:59,679 Speaker 2: And so I know it's not Dancing with the Stars, 104 00:04:59,680 --> 00:05:02,599 Speaker 2: but I and I've watched that plenty of times, of course, 105 00:05:02,640 --> 00:05:05,320 Speaker 2: but you know, when I sort of watching, so you 106 00:05:05,320 --> 00:05:07,240 Speaker 2: think you can dance or something I think that's what 107 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:10,520 Speaker 2: it's called. I never knew that I could be so 108 00:05:10,560 --> 00:05:16,520 Speaker 2: nogreat getting back to crying, so moved by two people 109 00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:19,719 Speaker 2: or one person moving their body to some piece of music. 110 00:05:20,400 --> 00:05:23,040 Speaker 2: There were moments in that show where I am sobbing 111 00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:28,360 Speaker 2: uncontrollably and I don't even understand why it's unbelievably moving. 112 00:05:28,760 --> 00:05:30,600 Speaker 1: I mean, it's an art form. I mean it's it 113 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:34,279 Speaker 1: is an expression through movement instead of you know, using 114 00:05:34,279 --> 00:05:38,039 Speaker 1: the complication of language and English. For me, at least, 115 00:05:38,040 --> 00:05:40,359 Speaker 1: that was complicated growing up. You know, it was my 116 00:05:40,480 --> 00:05:44,360 Speaker 1: way of communication was through movement. And I think when 117 00:05:44,560 --> 00:05:47,320 Speaker 1: you bring authenticity to it, it is a beautiful thing. 118 00:05:47,560 --> 00:05:49,039 Speaker 1: Or it could be a shit show. You know, it 119 00:05:49,080 --> 00:05:49,880 Speaker 1: just depends. 120 00:05:50,839 --> 00:05:55,560 Speaker 5: Wells it's usually a little bit about Yes, yes, absolutely, it's. 121 00:05:55,400 --> 00:05:58,440 Speaker 3: A very dramatic growing up. You know, dance it's a. 122 00:05:58,560 --> 00:06:01,160 Speaker 5: Very dramatic art form as well, So you bring all 123 00:06:01,200 --> 00:06:04,719 Speaker 5: of that drama to the floor and to the class 124 00:06:04,800 --> 00:06:07,760 Speaker 5: and sometimes unfortunately to the community. 125 00:06:08,360 --> 00:06:12,360 Speaker 3: Yeah, you know it's like but. 126 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:14,800 Speaker 2: But but but growing growing up, when you're saying that 127 00:06:14,800 --> 00:06:17,640 Speaker 2: that was your sort of form of communication, yeah, was 128 00:06:17,680 --> 00:06:20,599 Speaker 2: that was that? Was there a reason for that? Was 129 00:06:20,640 --> 00:06:23,320 Speaker 2: it the way that you will how come, Like, why 130 00:06:23,440 --> 00:06:25,680 Speaker 2: was that your bad communication? 131 00:06:25,720 --> 00:06:27,560 Speaker 1: I would to give you a cliff note version. It's 132 00:06:27,560 --> 00:06:29,840 Speaker 1: going to sound like I'm so casually talking about someone 133 00:06:29,839 --> 00:06:32,839 Speaker 1: else's life, but I'm just gonna give it to you. Okay. 134 00:06:32,960 --> 00:06:35,640 Speaker 3: This is an elevator pitch of your life, right. 135 00:06:36,720 --> 00:06:38,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, So you guys want to like act about it 136 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:40,679 Speaker 1: or do a movie, you know, feel free? 137 00:06:40,960 --> 00:06:41,359 Speaker 2: Perfect? 138 00:06:42,320 --> 00:06:44,560 Speaker 1: Okay. So at two years old, my mom and my 139 00:06:44,640 --> 00:06:47,360 Speaker 1: real dad divorced. So my very first memory as a 140 00:06:47,440 --> 00:06:50,479 Speaker 1: kid was seeing my father with another woman. I was 141 00:06:50,480 --> 00:06:55,080 Speaker 1: like around two years old, and then I from there, 142 00:06:55,200 --> 00:06:59,359 Speaker 1: my mom remarried my stepfather, and what came with my 143 00:06:59,400 --> 00:07:03,480 Speaker 1: stepfather and his previous marriage was a caretaker who molested 144 00:07:03,520 --> 00:07:07,039 Speaker 1: both me and my stepsister at the time. I say 145 00:07:07,040 --> 00:07:09,160 Speaker 1: at the time, because she just passed in August this 146 00:07:09,200 --> 00:07:13,960 Speaker 1: past August, and I testified against him in court. I 147 00:07:14,000 --> 00:07:16,320 Speaker 1: was nine years old, and it was happening for like 148 00:07:16,480 --> 00:07:19,440 Speaker 1: four or five years. And it was interesting because at 149 00:07:19,480 --> 00:07:22,040 Speaker 1: the time, you know, it wasn't like physical it wasn't 150 00:07:22,080 --> 00:07:27,120 Speaker 1: like a physical pain that went that. I guess it's 151 00:07:27,120 --> 00:07:29,640 Speaker 1: hard to translate, but it's like the physical pain wasn't 152 00:07:29,880 --> 00:07:31,760 Speaker 1: there as much as the grooming was, you know what 153 00:07:31,840 --> 00:07:34,240 Speaker 1: I mean. So it was like he acted as that 154 00:07:34,560 --> 00:07:37,800 Speaker 1: father figure. My mom and my stepdad were both like 155 00:07:38,200 --> 00:07:41,440 Speaker 1: working and my mother, you know, built a business and 156 00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:45,000 Speaker 1: you know, has a rags to riches Story's Philip. She's 157 00:07:45,000 --> 00:07:47,480 Speaker 1: from the Philippines, and you know when she when she 158 00:07:47,560 --> 00:07:50,800 Speaker 1: divorced my father, who went to you know, follow his passion, 159 00:07:50,840 --> 00:07:54,520 Speaker 1: which was and starts with the p ends with a y, 160 00:07:54,880 --> 00:07:58,960 Speaker 1: I say it was because he, uh, he was very 161 00:07:59,000 --> 00:08:01,960 Speaker 1: successful attorney the Bay Bay area where I'm from, and 162 00:08:02,000 --> 00:08:05,880 Speaker 1: then from there he just fled to the Philippines and 163 00:08:05,920 --> 00:08:08,120 Speaker 1: then went to Thailand and built a whole strip of 164 00:08:08,120 --> 00:08:12,080 Speaker 1: strip clubs in Thailand in Pataya, which is like a 165 00:08:12,120 --> 00:08:13,000 Speaker 1: small little town. 166 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:17,080 Speaker 3: Yeah, and it's not an elevator pitch. This is this 167 00:08:17,160 --> 00:08:18,400 Speaker 3: is wow. 168 00:08:18,640 --> 00:08:20,880 Speaker 5: First of all, I just you know you, I mean, 169 00:08:21,040 --> 00:08:24,960 Speaker 5: it's first of all, I'm so sorry anyone would ever 170 00:08:25,040 --> 00:08:27,080 Speaker 5: have to go through anything like that. But for you 171 00:08:27,200 --> 00:08:30,520 Speaker 5: like that, you have to constantly be working through that, 172 00:08:30,600 --> 00:08:30,880 Speaker 5: I guess. 173 00:08:30,880 --> 00:08:35,440 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, so much compassion and love, Thank you you, 174 00:08:36,080 --> 00:08:38,240 Speaker 1: thank you. And you know I was I was really 175 00:08:38,320 --> 00:08:40,959 Speaker 1: really quiet as a kid. My mom thought I was deaf. 176 00:08:41,480 --> 00:08:44,120 Speaker 1: She brought me to a hearing specialist and the doctor 177 00:08:44,200 --> 00:08:46,200 Speaker 1: was like, no, she can hear. She's just going through 178 00:08:46,200 --> 00:08:50,600 Speaker 1: major PTSD, you know. And so for me there was 179 00:08:51,000 --> 00:08:54,800 Speaker 1: I guess the communication. The there's two languages being spoken 180 00:08:54,840 --> 00:08:58,720 Speaker 1: at home from my other nanny who raised me practically 181 00:08:58,800 --> 00:09:01,880 Speaker 1: from when I was born in eighty for until I 182 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:04,360 Speaker 1: was thirteen, and she only spoke to Gollog, which is 183 00:09:04,400 --> 00:09:07,319 Speaker 1: the Filipino language. And then my mother was working constantly, 184 00:09:07,400 --> 00:09:09,600 Speaker 1: like twenty four hours a day. She was building a 185 00:09:09,640 --> 00:09:13,640 Speaker 1: business and a company. So on top of the sexual 186 00:09:13,840 --> 00:09:16,679 Speaker 1: you know, abuse, and then also the languages, I just 187 00:09:16,960 --> 00:09:19,200 Speaker 1: was more of an observer. Now I can't shut the 188 00:09:19,360 --> 00:09:23,880 Speaker 1: f up, but I guess that's what happens. But I 189 00:09:24,000 --> 00:09:26,280 Speaker 1: was definitely you know, it was hard for me to 190 00:09:26,280 --> 00:09:28,680 Speaker 1: communicate through language. So for me, that's why I say, 191 00:09:28,760 --> 00:09:30,760 Speaker 1: you know, dance was my way of communication. 192 00:09:30,920 --> 00:09:33,280 Speaker 3: So and where did you find dance? 193 00:09:33,400 --> 00:09:36,000 Speaker 5: Was that something that your your mother had something to 194 00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:38,640 Speaker 5: do with or was that something you discovered. 195 00:09:39,200 --> 00:09:42,960 Speaker 1: No, I come from the original dance mom. So she's like, 196 00:09:43,040 --> 00:09:44,880 Speaker 1: get in that, get in the classes. 197 00:09:44,920 --> 00:09:45,080 Speaker 2: You know. 198 00:09:45,200 --> 00:09:48,360 Speaker 1: She put me into everything from like ballet to tennis 199 00:09:48,440 --> 00:09:52,680 Speaker 1: to soccer, horseback riding. I wasn't great at school, so 200 00:09:52,960 --> 00:09:54,760 Speaker 1: I mean, thank God for her in the long run. 201 00:09:54,800 --> 00:09:57,280 Speaker 1: But I started in ballet from four to eleven and 202 00:09:57,320 --> 00:10:00,000 Speaker 1: then literally grew out of my tights, Like I became 203 00:10:00,000 --> 00:10:02,959 Speaker 1: I'm a woman at a very early age. I'm nine 204 00:10:03,040 --> 00:10:05,520 Speaker 1: years old. I started developing and I basically have the 205 00:10:05,520 --> 00:10:08,000 Speaker 1: same body that I do now. Then when I was nine, 206 00:10:08,040 --> 00:10:11,880 Speaker 1: which is insanity. And then yeah, and then I just 207 00:10:11,960 --> 00:10:14,520 Speaker 1: literally grew out of my tights, couldn't hang with all 208 00:10:14,520 --> 00:10:17,600 Speaker 1: the other, you know, girls, and so I switched to ballroom. 209 00:10:17,640 --> 00:10:19,720 Speaker 1: My mom and stepdad they were trying to find a 210 00:10:19,880 --> 00:10:22,840 Speaker 1: family sport for us to do, and golf just wasn't 211 00:10:23,320 --> 00:10:26,120 Speaker 1: wasn't it. So They're like, have about ballroom dancing? And 212 00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:28,400 Speaker 1: I was like, that is for old people, but I'll 213 00:10:28,400 --> 00:10:31,280 Speaker 1: try it, like I'll see what, you know, if there's 214 00:10:31,400 --> 00:10:33,640 Speaker 1: kids or whatever. I went to a local dance competition 215 00:10:33,679 --> 00:10:35,559 Speaker 1: in the bar area and I saw kids my age, 216 00:10:36,080 --> 00:10:37,920 Speaker 1: you know, shake their little butts, and I was like, 217 00:10:37,960 --> 00:10:38,520 Speaker 1: sign me up. 218 00:10:40,240 --> 00:10:43,080 Speaker 3: We were like put that little sparkly outfit on. 219 00:10:43,280 --> 00:10:46,160 Speaker 1: Me and spray tand and some lashes, like are you 220 00:10:46,280 --> 00:10:46,760 Speaker 1: kidding me? 221 00:10:47,120 --> 00:10:51,360 Speaker 2: Yes? How long did the stepdad stick around. 222 00:10:51,600 --> 00:10:53,400 Speaker 1: He's still around. I call him my dad, like, he's 223 00:10:53,440 --> 00:10:53,839 Speaker 1: my dad. 224 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:56,040 Speaker 2: You know who was the asshole? 225 00:10:56,600 --> 00:10:58,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm which was my real father? 226 00:10:58,920 --> 00:10:59,800 Speaker 2: Oh, the real father? 227 00:11:00,320 --> 00:11:01,439 Speaker 3: It was your real father. 228 00:11:01,559 --> 00:11:04,840 Speaker 1: My real father cheated on my mother, like multiple multiple times. 229 00:11:04,880 --> 00:11:06,880 Speaker 1: I mean he cheated on her with his secretary. Then 230 00:11:06,920 --> 00:11:09,480 Speaker 1: that's why I have a half sister who I just 231 00:11:09,559 --> 00:11:12,679 Speaker 1: met at my dad's wake, you know, right, so and 232 00:11:12,760 --> 00:11:15,559 Speaker 1: then and then who knows how many half I mean 233 00:11:15,559 --> 00:11:17,400 Speaker 1: I just did my twenty three and meters, and I 234 00:11:17,440 --> 00:11:20,760 Speaker 1: mean there's a lot. I've got a dynamic of a 235 00:11:21,679 --> 00:11:23,880 Speaker 1: different I guess individuals. 236 00:11:24,440 --> 00:11:26,319 Speaker 2: Wait, wait, I know. I was trying to get this 237 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:28,079 Speaker 2: straight that who did the Who was the groo? Who 238 00:11:28,080 --> 00:11:28,760 Speaker 2: did the grooming? 239 00:11:28,800 --> 00:11:31,480 Speaker 1: Who is that the man who was sexually abusing me 240 00:11:31,520 --> 00:11:34,520 Speaker 1: and my stepsister who came from my step dad and 241 00:11:34,679 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 1: his previous marriage. 242 00:11:36,600 --> 00:11:38,880 Speaker 2: God, So he was like the caretaker. 243 00:11:39,200 --> 00:11:41,439 Speaker 1: Yeah, he drove us around because the other nanny who 244 00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:43,720 Speaker 1: only spoke to Golg she couldn't drive. She didn't have 245 00:11:43,720 --> 00:11:46,079 Speaker 1: her driver's license. Sorry, I didn't make that care got it, 246 00:11:46,160 --> 00:11:46,439 Speaker 1: got it? 247 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:46,680 Speaker 2: Okay? 248 00:11:46,760 --> 00:11:49,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, father didn't protect you. 249 00:11:50,080 --> 00:11:53,360 Speaker 1: My father wasn't there, like he had left, he moved 250 00:11:53,360 --> 00:11:55,800 Speaker 1: to Thailand or the Philippines, and he's you know, he 251 00:11:55,880 --> 00:11:59,319 Speaker 1: had so many different relationships and probably so many different kids, 252 00:11:59,559 --> 00:12:01,760 Speaker 1: but my mom made sure I connect. I still had 253 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:04,440 Speaker 1: a relationship with my real father, so as a new 254 00:12:04,520 --> 00:12:07,800 Speaker 1: family with my stepdad. My stepsister who looks like a 255 00:12:07,960 --> 00:12:10,680 Speaker 1: live Barbie doll, Like, we look nothing alike, you know, 256 00:12:10,800 --> 00:12:14,320 Speaker 1: She's blond, and I was like this Asian little kid. 257 00:12:14,720 --> 00:12:17,480 Speaker 1: And we would travel to Thailand and visit my dad 258 00:12:17,720 --> 00:12:20,040 Speaker 1: at his strip clubs. He would live on top of 259 00:12:20,080 --> 00:12:22,280 Speaker 1: a I mean we wouldn't go in the stream. I 260 00:12:22,320 --> 00:12:24,320 Speaker 1: mean well we had to actually because he lived on 261 00:12:24,360 --> 00:12:27,640 Speaker 1: top of Bubbles, which is one of his strip clubs. Yeah, 262 00:12:27,679 --> 00:12:34,080 Speaker 1: the name of one of his Wow. Oh but then 263 00:12:34,200 --> 00:12:36,960 Speaker 1: check this out. Then you know, my father passes away. 264 00:12:37,000 --> 00:12:40,680 Speaker 1: He was an alcoholic. I'm also an addict as well, 265 00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:42,680 Speaker 1: but I've been sober for like five and a half 266 00:12:42,800 --> 00:12:46,440 Speaker 1: years almost. But when we would go visit him, you know, 267 00:12:46,679 --> 00:12:49,199 Speaker 1: he would just always say to me, never come back 268 00:12:49,280 --> 00:12:52,000 Speaker 1: here if I pass away. And I'm like, okay, Like 269 00:12:52,160 --> 00:12:54,800 Speaker 1: I was just a little naive. I still felt like 270 00:12:54,880 --> 00:12:57,000 Speaker 1: my real dad was my best friend. Because as I 271 00:12:57,040 --> 00:12:59,719 Speaker 1: grew up, you know, we would always like FaceTime and 272 00:12:59,840 --> 00:13:02,280 Speaker 1: we would have our drink and poison of choice and 273 00:13:02,280 --> 00:13:05,360 Speaker 1: we would just have hours and hours of conversations. And 274 00:13:05,440 --> 00:13:08,400 Speaker 1: then when I went there, when he passed away, I 275 00:13:08,440 --> 00:13:10,600 Speaker 1: guess he was involved in the Russian mafia and they 276 00:13:10,679 --> 00:13:14,520 Speaker 1: chased me out of my father's wake because there was 277 00:13:14,559 --> 00:13:18,080 Speaker 1: this Yeah, so basically his attorney who was the power 278 00:13:18,120 --> 00:13:23,960 Speaker 1: of attorney, which is insanity anyway, this type man spread 279 00:13:24,000 --> 00:13:26,600 Speaker 1: a rumor, I guess, saying my father wired me like 280 00:13:26,800 --> 00:13:31,440 Speaker 1: five hundred million dollars and so but really that wasn't 281 00:13:31,480 --> 00:13:31,839 Speaker 1: the case. 282 00:13:33,440 --> 00:13:34,960 Speaker 3: Wow, my god, I. 283 00:13:34,880 --> 00:13:36,560 Speaker 1: Know that's what. I don't really care write this shit. 284 00:13:37,040 --> 00:13:38,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, but no, you can't. 285 00:13:38,640 --> 00:13:41,319 Speaker 2: Well that's so interesting. So you had a relationship with 286 00:13:41,400 --> 00:13:45,760 Speaker 2: your father because your mother was keen on you, Yes, 287 00:13:45,880 --> 00:13:49,760 Speaker 2: keeping that established, you know, correct. But your stepdad, who 288 00:13:49,760 --> 00:13:52,040 Speaker 2: you call dad, is the one who raised you. 289 00:13:52,160 --> 00:13:55,240 Speaker 1: So I would say, yes, yes, right, it's it's. 290 00:13:55,120 --> 00:13:57,920 Speaker 2: Not a dissimilar story, you know, because Katie, I have 291 00:13:58,000 --> 00:14:00,920 Speaker 2: a similar situation where our dad was out of the picture. 292 00:14:01,000 --> 00:14:04,120 Speaker 2: Kurt came into our lives and basically raised us. Okay, 293 00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:07,880 Speaker 2: him our dad, we call him paw Pa because he 294 00:14:08,640 --> 00:14:10,640 Speaker 2: there was a moment we were actually just joking about 295 00:14:10,720 --> 00:14:13,959 Speaker 2: right before you came on, where our dad comes to 296 00:14:14,000 --> 00:14:16,000 Speaker 2: pick us up. There's a fight in the house and 297 00:14:16,040 --> 00:14:18,439 Speaker 2: he leaves my sister and I standing on the doorstep 298 00:14:18,440 --> 00:14:20,960 Speaker 2: with our little suitcases waiting to go for the weekend, 299 00:14:21,600 --> 00:14:24,880 Speaker 2: and we run inside and I'm do an after school 300 00:14:24,880 --> 00:14:27,360 Speaker 2: special moment where I'm like, mom, it's all your fault, 301 00:14:27,480 --> 00:14:30,680 Speaker 2: you know. And that's when Kurt comes up to us 302 00:14:30,680 --> 00:14:34,640 Speaker 2: and says, look, I'm not your father and I'm not 303 00:14:34,880 --> 00:14:37,680 Speaker 2: Kurt anymore. We need to figure out a name for me, 304 00:14:38,360 --> 00:14:41,280 Speaker 2: and I will always be here for you, even if 305 00:14:41,280 --> 00:14:42,840 Speaker 2: I'm not with your mother, I will be here. He 306 00:14:42,880 --> 00:14:45,400 Speaker 2: made that promise to us, and so we came up. 307 00:14:45,480 --> 00:14:47,920 Speaker 2: He came up, I'm sure with the name Paw. So 308 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:48,600 Speaker 2: we called him. 309 00:14:48,640 --> 00:14:51,160 Speaker 5: We had all kinds of different names. One of them 310 00:14:51,240 --> 00:14:54,480 Speaker 5: was Popcorn. We were like making up all crazy names. 311 00:14:54,960 --> 00:14:55,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, I love that. 312 00:15:04,400 --> 00:15:08,320 Speaker 5: So your father passes away in two thy eighteen. 313 00:15:08,320 --> 00:15:10,600 Speaker 1: I think, so, Yeah, did. 314 00:15:10,440 --> 00:15:13,320 Speaker 3: You know when you went to the funeral or to 315 00:15:13,400 --> 00:15:17,000 Speaker 3: the to the wake that you're that you had a 316 00:15:17,000 --> 00:15:19,440 Speaker 3: half sister at all? Or was she just there? 317 00:15:19,960 --> 00:15:23,040 Speaker 1: Yeah? No, no, so she actually my half sister. Sorry, 318 00:15:23,040 --> 00:15:24,480 Speaker 1: I think I said that she was there. It wasn't 319 00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:26,440 Speaker 1: my half sister that was there was my half brother 320 00:15:26,560 --> 00:15:29,480 Speaker 1: who was like a Canadian opera singer. So I had 321 00:15:29,600 --> 00:15:32,120 Speaker 1: never met him. Now there are pictures of me and 322 00:15:32,200 --> 00:15:35,280 Speaker 1: my half sister. I don't remember. Obviously, we were really young, 323 00:15:35,520 --> 00:15:37,720 Speaker 1: and I think my father if it was with his 324 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:40,360 Speaker 1: secretary from his law firm, then this must have still, 325 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:42,920 Speaker 1: this must have been happening when you know, my mom 326 00:15:42,960 --> 00:15:45,440 Speaker 1: and dad were separated in San Francisco. So it's like, 327 00:15:45,920 --> 00:15:48,440 Speaker 1: so there was this like weird yeah, so it was 328 00:15:48,440 --> 00:15:54,000 Speaker 1: like a weird overlap. You're like, Okay, the story. 329 00:15:53,960 --> 00:15:58,360 Speaker 5: Was just common, but I feel like there's some overlap, yes, 330 00:15:58,400 --> 00:16:00,360 Speaker 5: and a lot of yeah. So that you have a 331 00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:03,320 Speaker 5: half brother as well, so you too, did you you 332 00:16:03,520 --> 00:16:04,880 Speaker 5: didn't know about your half brother? 333 00:16:05,080 --> 00:16:07,080 Speaker 1: No, I knew about him, I just never met him 334 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:08,600 Speaker 1: in person until then. 335 00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:10,800 Speaker 3: So what was that like? 336 00:16:11,520 --> 00:16:11,600 Speaker 6: It? 337 00:16:11,840 --> 00:16:14,640 Speaker 1: You know, it's all I always I don't know. I 338 00:16:14,640 --> 00:16:17,280 Speaker 1: think probably because of the way what happened to me. Obviously, 339 00:16:17,320 --> 00:16:21,280 Speaker 1: I have trust issues and I don't necessarily, you know, 340 00:16:21,400 --> 00:16:25,280 Speaker 1: trust you, and I'm not like the most open vulnerable person. 341 00:16:26,320 --> 00:16:28,400 Speaker 1: But I'm learning and I get I get it. Like 342 00:16:28,440 --> 00:16:32,720 Speaker 1: I'm putting the pieces together, so it wasn't necessarily welcoming 343 00:16:32,800 --> 00:16:35,440 Speaker 1: with open arms. I just wanted to like because at 344 00:16:35,480 --> 00:16:38,000 Speaker 1: that time too, it's like what's going where? But then 345 00:16:38,040 --> 00:16:41,320 Speaker 1: everything got stolen, so you're just like, what is happening? 346 00:16:41,480 --> 00:16:43,560 Speaker 1: Why am I just seeing you for the first time? 347 00:16:43,760 --> 00:16:46,320 Speaker 1: What is your you know, intention with all of this? 348 00:16:46,560 --> 00:16:49,480 Speaker 1: Like I swear, you know, my father may have never 349 00:16:49,520 --> 00:16:51,600 Speaker 1: talked about him as much. You know, I know, I'm 350 00:16:51,640 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 1: his firstborn, So there's just all this like red flags, 351 00:16:54,320 --> 00:17:00,320 Speaker 1: red flags, So it's just so complicated stolen. Well, so yeah, 352 00:17:00,320 --> 00:17:02,840 Speaker 1: so I guess with the strip club business, if you 353 00:17:02,920 --> 00:17:06,480 Speaker 1: ever interested in knowing this, in Thailand it is very 354 00:17:06,520 --> 00:17:10,680 Speaker 1: much run by mafia and so I mean, like I 355 00:17:10,840 --> 00:17:15,560 Speaker 1: couldn't even finish. I had to hire armed guards because 356 00:17:15,600 --> 00:17:19,199 Speaker 1: also they don't speak that much English in Thailand, and 357 00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:21,520 Speaker 1: it was really complicated. I hired an attorney. It was 358 00:17:21,600 --> 00:17:23,280 Speaker 1: just a lot, and I turned it into like Claire 359 00:17:23,359 --> 00:17:26,960 Speaker 1: Danes from Homeland, like literally this took my life over 360 00:17:27,680 --> 00:17:30,239 Speaker 1: knowing that, you know, my father passed away already. There 361 00:17:30,280 --> 00:17:31,960 Speaker 1: was no way of bringing him back. But I had 362 00:17:32,000 --> 00:17:35,880 Speaker 1: so many unanswered you know questions basically, and I will 363 00:17:35,960 --> 00:17:37,359 Speaker 1: for the rest of my life. I guess I just 364 00:17:37,400 --> 00:17:38,679 Speaker 1: have to be okay with it. 365 00:17:39,040 --> 00:17:41,960 Speaker 2: So are you constantly seeking answers to some of these questions? 366 00:17:42,160 --> 00:17:43,880 Speaker 2: Have you let it go? Yeah? 367 00:17:43,960 --> 00:17:46,640 Speaker 1: I have to for my own mental health. Like actually, 368 00:17:47,520 --> 00:17:48,919 Speaker 1: I don't know if you guys believe in this stuff, 369 00:17:48,960 --> 00:17:51,520 Speaker 1: but you know John Edwards the medium. 370 00:17:51,480 --> 00:17:53,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, do I believe in it? 371 00:17:54,600 --> 00:17:57,600 Speaker 1: I live with it. So he's like a closet ballroom dancer. 372 00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:00,520 Speaker 1: Did you know that he loves ballroom dancing. It's like 373 00:18:00,560 --> 00:18:03,600 Speaker 1: a ballroom dancer. Anyway, I met him years ago, and 374 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:05,840 Speaker 1: he's the one that convinced me just to like let 375 00:18:05,880 --> 00:18:09,760 Speaker 1: it go because it was actually taking my life over 376 00:18:09,920 --> 00:18:11,000 Speaker 1: and I was like what am I going to do? 377 00:18:11,119 --> 00:18:13,639 Speaker 1: Like this is it? My father died. There's nothing I 378 00:18:13,640 --> 00:18:15,679 Speaker 1: can do, you know. But still it's like I'm just, 379 00:18:16,200 --> 00:18:17,400 Speaker 1: you know, an addict in that way. 380 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:22,480 Speaker 2: What were you obsessing over? Specifically with this was. 381 00:18:22,440 --> 00:18:25,399 Speaker 1: Like breaking into his bank account. I was like going 382 00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:28,560 Speaker 1: because I was like, where is everything right? Like also 383 00:18:28,600 --> 00:18:32,160 Speaker 1: there was two different wills, like I you know in Thailand, 384 00:18:32,240 --> 00:18:35,200 Speaker 1: like it's so shady a shit happens over there, and 385 00:18:35,280 --> 00:18:36,800 Speaker 1: you know, at the end of the day, Okay, I 386 00:18:36,800 --> 00:18:39,879 Speaker 1: can fight all day and long. It's like, where is 387 00:18:39,880 --> 00:18:41,960 Speaker 1: it going to get me other than broke? Right? 388 00:18:42,160 --> 00:18:46,480 Speaker 3: Like yeah, really, sometimes you just have to let go. 389 00:18:47,400 --> 00:18:49,679 Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, so now to John Edwards. 390 00:18:50,720 --> 00:18:54,000 Speaker 2: But the attic nature is so interesting where you can 391 00:18:54,920 --> 00:18:58,520 Speaker 2: the addiction can be transferred over to pretty much anything. 392 00:18:58,840 --> 00:19:01,760 Speaker 1: Absolutely. Yeah. And that's when I had just stopped drinking, 393 00:19:01,800 --> 00:19:04,280 Speaker 1: so it was a full on yeah, that was where 394 00:19:04,320 --> 00:19:06,399 Speaker 1: I was all my energy was going to. And then 395 00:19:06,440 --> 00:19:08,199 Speaker 1: I was engaged to at that time, so it was 396 00:19:08,280 --> 00:19:09,960 Speaker 1: just a yeah. 397 00:19:09,800 --> 00:19:14,560 Speaker 2: Oh gosh, I don't know how that was that engagement. 398 00:19:15,640 --> 00:19:16,320 Speaker 1: I'm divorced. 399 00:19:16,400 --> 00:19:24,000 Speaker 5: Yeah, what is your relationship now with your half siblings? 400 00:19:24,359 --> 00:19:27,800 Speaker 1: So I'm really close to Nicole, who you're about to meet. 401 00:19:28,280 --> 00:19:31,760 Speaker 1: She's nine years younger than me, so she's comes from 402 00:19:31,760 --> 00:19:37,080 Speaker 1: my mother and my stepdad. And then I was when 403 00:19:37,080 --> 00:19:39,240 Speaker 1: I was growing up, I was close to my stepsister 404 00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:41,560 Speaker 1: who was five years older than me. But she had 405 00:19:41,600 --> 00:19:45,520 Speaker 1: just passed away end of August, I believe from addiction. 406 00:19:45,840 --> 00:19:48,199 Speaker 1: So sorry, thank you. 407 00:19:48,320 --> 00:19:49,920 Speaker 3: And then what about your half brother. 408 00:19:51,320 --> 00:19:52,920 Speaker 1: I don't really have a relationship with. 409 00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:54,960 Speaker 3: Him and your half sister. 410 00:19:55,320 --> 00:19:57,960 Speaker 1: I mean we're we talk every once in a while. 411 00:19:58,040 --> 00:20:00,000 Speaker 1: It's not like at first I think when this was 412 00:20:00,080 --> 00:20:04,120 Speaker 1: all happening, I just needed to like I wanted somebody 413 00:20:04,160 --> 00:20:07,040 Speaker 1: that knew my dad to talk to, and so we 414 00:20:07,200 --> 00:20:09,960 Speaker 1: became really close and then like you know, I had 415 00:20:10,040 --> 00:20:13,040 Speaker 1: just this wall started to develop. And it has nothing 416 00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:14,840 Speaker 1: to do with them. It has everything to do with 417 00:20:14,880 --> 00:20:16,960 Speaker 1: me and my own issues, you know. 418 00:20:17,240 --> 00:20:22,560 Speaker 2: So it's also probably protecting yourself as absolutely. Yeah, yeah, 419 00:20:22,760 --> 00:20:24,760 Speaker 2: have you done twenty three and me? And do you 420 00:20:24,800 --> 00:20:25,439 Speaker 2: have a thousand? 421 00:20:26,520 --> 00:20:28,639 Speaker 1: First of all, my father lied to me. I'm not 422 00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:32,919 Speaker 1: Russian Irish. I'm straight up Oshganazi Jewish fifty three percent. 423 00:20:33,400 --> 00:20:35,240 Speaker 2: Oh my god, Oh my god. 424 00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:39,119 Speaker 1: I'm more Ashganazi Jewish than Filipino. My mother's Filipino. And 425 00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:39,960 Speaker 1: it's pretty cut. 426 00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's so funny. 427 00:20:43,359 --> 00:20:45,920 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, I don't know why he didn't tell me that, 428 00:20:45,960 --> 00:20:47,560 Speaker 1: But I mean, I wire. 429 00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:50,520 Speaker 5: Dad lied to us because he was so Italian, Italian Italian. 430 00:20:50,520 --> 00:20:52,360 Speaker 5: But the truth is is that we were more Italian 431 00:20:52,359 --> 00:20:53,360 Speaker 5: than I thought we were. 432 00:20:53,640 --> 00:20:57,640 Speaker 2: Oh really well yeah, And the other thing is we 433 00:20:57,640 --> 00:20:59,720 Speaker 2: we've told the story before and I'll go, but but 434 00:20:59,760 --> 00:21:01,720 Speaker 2: I have we have the same situation. I show up 435 00:21:01,720 --> 00:21:03,639 Speaker 2: at my house and there's a note under the door 436 00:21:04,359 --> 00:21:07,480 Speaker 2: and it says my name is Paul. I'd love to 437 00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:10,520 Speaker 2: have a conversation with you. Turns out this guy who 438 00:21:10,600 --> 00:21:15,920 Speaker 2: lives in Utah is my our half brother. My father 439 00:21:16,119 --> 00:21:18,439 Speaker 2: had him when he was sixteen and had to give 440 00:21:18,480 --> 00:21:22,920 Speaker 2: him up for adoption. Wow. Yeah, so we have discovered 441 00:21:22,920 --> 00:21:26,200 Speaker 2: this and on twenty three and me, there's potentially another 442 00:21:26,280 --> 00:21:30,240 Speaker 2: one for trying to figure out for sure. 443 00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:32,960 Speaker 1: I'm almost like, do I even want to know? You know, 444 00:21:33,000 --> 00:21:35,879 Speaker 1: it's like it's just so complicated already. But he just 445 00:21:35,960 --> 00:21:39,320 Speaker 1: left a note under the door. He didn't give a knock. 446 00:21:39,720 --> 00:21:42,320 Speaker 2: No, no, there was a note. I came home and to 447 00:21:42,400 --> 00:21:44,720 Speaker 2: be he was more respectful. 448 00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:47,200 Speaker 1: Yeahs did he send mail? 449 00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:53,560 Speaker 2: No? No, he went to Disneyland and then and slipped 450 00:21:53,600 --> 00:21:54,280 Speaker 2: them under the door. 451 00:21:54,920 --> 00:21:56,840 Speaker 5: And the funniest thing is he didn't want to do 452 00:21:57,160 --> 00:21:59,680 Speaker 5: it to mine because he thought then I would definitely 453 00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:03,040 Speaker 5: he thought Oliver would be the better way, because totally 454 00:22:03,800 --> 00:22:07,520 Speaker 5: you know. And the irony is is that Oliver was like, 455 00:22:07,600 --> 00:22:08,560 Speaker 5: I can't deal with this. 456 00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:12,840 Speaker 2: I have enough problem. 457 00:22:12,880 --> 00:22:14,640 Speaker 1: Did he tell you, like, did you tell her your 458 00:22:14,640 --> 00:22:16,000 Speaker 1: sister right away this happened? 459 00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:19,000 Speaker 2: Oh yeah, well I had I had Claudia, who's taking 460 00:22:19,040 --> 00:22:21,280 Speaker 2: care of our kids at the time, like Claudia, I 461 00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:23,000 Speaker 2: don't know who the fuck this guy is, Like, I 462 00:22:23,000 --> 00:22:24,800 Speaker 2: don't know if this is real or not. I said, 463 00:22:24,960 --> 00:22:28,960 Speaker 2: call this number and pretend you're my assistant and let's 464 00:22:29,040 --> 00:22:31,920 Speaker 2: let's start there. And so she called and she's like, huh, 465 00:22:32,280 --> 00:22:35,240 Speaker 2: this is all of my assistant and he's like, I'm sorry, 466 00:22:35,320 --> 00:22:38,399 Speaker 2: here's the situation, blah blah blah. And then she's like, well, 467 00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:39,760 Speaker 2: let me see if I can get him. And I'm 468 00:22:39,800 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 2: standing right next to her, and then I get and 469 00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:43,560 Speaker 2: then I tell Kate. 470 00:22:43,320 --> 00:22:45,960 Speaker 3: You didn't you didn't get on the phone. 471 00:22:46,280 --> 00:22:50,160 Speaker 2: No, I got scared you. 472 00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:52,600 Speaker 3: Never got on the phone. Because then I didn't want 473 00:22:52,640 --> 00:22:53,080 Speaker 3: to deal it. 474 00:22:53,240 --> 00:22:56,439 Speaker 2: I have enough therapy for my whole life, Like, I 475 00:22:56,440 --> 00:22:58,800 Speaker 2: can't deal with another situation the same. 476 00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:02,200 Speaker 1: I beg sucking four like to like. 477 00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:08,320 Speaker 2: And then Kate. But then Kate takes over. I'm we're 478 00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:12,280 Speaker 2: getting DNA tests. We're going to DNA test. I'm like, Kate, 479 00:23:12,320 --> 00:23:12,879 Speaker 2: I love you you. 480 00:23:14,359 --> 00:23:16,080 Speaker 3: The best thing was that Paul said. 481 00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:17,880 Speaker 5: The first thing he said is like, yeah, I guess 482 00:23:17,880 --> 00:23:22,600 Speaker 5: your brothers. She said she was his assistant, but it 483 00:23:22,680 --> 00:23:29,240 Speaker 5: didn't sounds very professional. That the first thing which which 484 00:23:29,359 --> 00:23:32,679 Speaker 5: made me immediately realize he actually was our brother. 485 00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:34,880 Speaker 3: Yes, that's so good. 486 00:23:34,920 --> 00:23:36,840 Speaker 1: You're hearing about bathing in the background. 487 00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:40,320 Speaker 5: I thought it was so amazing. It's like, I you know, 488 00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:42,920 Speaker 5: there's he has three kids and and. 489 00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:46,399 Speaker 2: He looked we saw a picture like holy ship. 490 00:23:46,240 --> 00:23:46,400 Speaker 6: Like. 491 00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:53,760 Speaker 2: No, no, no, yeah, my gosh. 492 00:23:53,800 --> 00:23:55,720 Speaker 3: Well he lives in Utah. 493 00:23:55,760 --> 00:23:58,000 Speaker 2: We d M I DM with him. You know, yeah, 494 00:23:58,080 --> 00:23:59,000 Speaker 2: a little bit nice. 495 00:23:59,480 --> 00:24:02,800 Speaker 3: That's nice, cheryld Do you think there's any more siblings? 496 00:24:02,840 --> 00:24:03,160 Speaker 3: Do you think? 497 00:24:04,680 --> 00:24:05,040 Speaker 2: Yes? 498 00:24:05,560 --> 00:24:09,200 Speaker 1: I mean he married one of his employees. I guess 499 00:24:09,280 --> 00:24:15,960 Speaker 1: you could say, uh tiland and supposedly there's like two 500 00:24:16,040 --> 00:24:21,119 Speaker 1: little dancers, there's two little girls or something. But you 501 00:24:21,160 --> 00:24:23,960 Speaker 1: know what, all I know, Yeah, all I know is 502 00:24:24,000 --> 00:24:27,480 Speaker 1: I am his first for now. I mean, honestly, nothing 503 00:24:27,480 --> 00:24:32,440 Speaker 1: shocks me at this point. And your mom, my, mom, 504 00:24:32,760 --> 00:24:33,520 Speaker 1: she's great. 505 00:24:33,920 --> 00:24:35,480 Speaker 3: And you're close, you're super close. 506 00:24:35,560 --> 00:24:37,280 Speaker 1: Well we're as close as we can be. Look, it's 507 00:24:37,320 --> 00:24:41,119 Speaker 1: a really different dynamic. Like you see, like you'll meet 508 00:24:41,160 --> 00:24:43,240 Speaker 1: my sister here in a second, and she's she doesn't 509 00:24:43,240 --> 00:24:45,080 Speaker 1: come from a broken family, you know what I mean. 510 00:24:45,119 --> 00:24:49,520 Speaker 1: So it's like, yeah, it is different, like regardless and 511 00:24:49,600 --> 00:24:52,720 Speaker 1: you know her her insecurities are may not be I mean, 512 00:24:52,720 --> 00:24:54,679 Speaker 1: I'm not comparing the two. It's so different, but like, 513 00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:57,840 Speaker 1: but also then she had to see me go on television, 514 00:24:57,840 --> 00:25:00,600 Speaker 1: and then my mother holding like Filipino tea parties at 515 00:25:00,600 --> 00:25:05,320 Speaker 1: her house and like celebrating her daughter, her daughter's success 516 00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:08,239 Speaker 1: on primetime TV. For I was on that show for 517 00:25:08,240 --> 00:25:10,720 Speaker 1: twenty six seasons, you know. So it's like, at the 518 00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:13,400 Speaker 1: end of the days, so long I just retired. 519 00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:16,919 Speaker 5: It is so long, seventeen years. Honestly, that makes me 520 00:25:17,000 --> 00:25:19,240 Speaker 5: feel like, are we all that much older? 521 00:25:19,680 --> 00:25:22,440 Speaker 1: How old were you when you started that, Sally twenty one? 522 00:25:22,600 --> 00:25:25,239 Speaker 1: I'm thirty nine, but like, but still we had did 523 00:25:25,280 --> 00:25:27,880 Speaker 1: two seasons a year. I mean, it was it's since. 524 00:25:27,920 --> 00:25:28,960 Speaker 1: I mean, I thought I was just going to do 525 00:25:28,960 --> 00:25:31,280 Speaker 1: one season and go back to Harlem, you know. 526 00:25:31,359 --> 00:25:34,239 Speaker 2: Yeah, before we get before get to your sister. This 527 00:25:34,280 --> 00:25:36,280 Speaker 2: is so fascinating. I talked for hours about all this. 528 00:25:36,359 --> 00:25:38,959 Speaker 2: I love this intricate, dark underbelly. 529 00:25:38,960 --> 00:25:41,640 Speaker 1: It's crazy shit, definitely interesting it is. 530 00:25:41,720 --> 00:25:45,000 Speaker 2: But did you get to know your father well before 531 00:25:45,040 --> 00:25:45,720 Speaker 2: he passed? 532 00:25:46,119 --> 00:25:46,520 Speaker 1: Yeah? 533 00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:52,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, yes, And how much did you see yourself 534 00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:54,760 Speaker 2: in him? You know what I mean? 535 00:25:55,040 --> 00:25:57,400 Speaker 1: No, one hundred percent. I am more my father than 536 00:25:57,440 --> 00:25:58,960 Speaker 1: anybody else, that's for damn. 537 00:25:59,000 --> 00:25:59,160 Speaker 6: Sure. 538 00:25:59,520 --> 00:26:03,240 Speaker 1: I look like him, I act like him, which isn't 539 00:26:03,320 --> 00:26:07,800 Speaker 1: always appropriate, but you know, it's just it's interesting. And 540 00:26:07,840 --> 00:26:10,439 Speaker 1: that's why I felt so close to him, and I 541 00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:12,800 Speaker 1: didn't really think of him. Yes, it was I hurt 542 00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:15,760 Speaker 1: by feeling abandoned, And yes, do I suffer from abandoned 543 00:26:16,080 --> 00:26:19,640 Speaker 1: mint attachment or whatever the hell? Or no, it's it's 544 00:26:19,720 --> 00:26:24,160 Speaker 1: a whatever something attachment anyway, who cares anxious? Anxious? Anxious 545 00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:28,479 Speaker 1: attachment anxious? Yes, but he knows more about me than 546 00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,720 Speaker 1: my mom will ever know, you know, because I felt safe, 547 00:26:30,760 --> 00:26:32,200 Speaker 1: I didn't feel judged by him. 548 00:26:32,800 --> 00:26:34,120 Speaker 2: Yeah, it's so interesting. 549 00:26:34,560 --> 00:26:38,399 Speaker 3: Oh, it's really so. You felt more judged by Mama. 550 00:26:38,920 --> 00:26:41,680 Speaker 1: Well yeah, I mean she was the active, but I 551 00:26:41,760 --> 00:26:46,160 Speaker 1: feel more obviously grateful for like thank God for her, 552 00:26:46,359 --> 00:26:49,959 Speaker 1: you know. But it's just a different dynamic, different dynamic 553 00:26:50,040 --> 00:26:50,959 Speaker 1: I can't compare. 554 00:26:51,560 --> 00:26:54,520 Speaker 5: I know kids are always harder on the most present parents. 555 00:26:54,560 --> 00:26:56,560 Speaker 1: Oh, I feel bad for my mom. 556 00:26:56,640 --> 00:27:00,440 Speaker 2: Actually, you have you not been to the Hoffman Institute. 557 00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:03,000 Speaker 1: Not yet, but I've heard amazing things about it. But 558 00:27:03,080 --> 00:27:05,439 Speaker 1: I'm a little bit scared. I'm a little scared of it. 559 00:27:05,520 --> 00:27:06,600 Speaker 2: I've done it I've done it. 560 00:27:06,600 --> 00:27:06,800 Speaker 1: It was. 561 00:27:07,080 --> 00:27:08,639 Speaker 2: It's incredible. It's incredible. 562 00:27:08,680 --> 00:27:10,760 Speaker 3: I'm just scared. 563 00:27:10,440 --> 00:27:12,520 Speaker 1: Of very loud. 564 00:27:13,359 --> 00:27:15,080 Speaker 2: It's incredible. I heard. 565 00:27:15,280 --> 00:27:17,000 Speaker 1: No, I'm definitely I should do that. I'm about to 566 00:27:17,000 --> 00:27:19,640 Speaker 1: turn forty in May, so I probably should gift myself. 567 00:27:20,400 --> 00:27:35,360 Speaker 1: I've thought about it, Okay. 568 00:27:29,840 --> 00:27:33,480 Speaker 7: Nicole, precious guys. 569 00:27:33,800 --> 00:27:38,119 Speaker 3: Hello, oh yeah, we're so good. 570 00:27:38,240 --> 00:27:42,399 Speaker 5: We just got the full Cheryl Rundown and we're like 571 00:27:42,560 --> 00:27:45,560 Speaker 5: our mouths like our jaws have dropped. 572 00:27:45,800 --> 00:27:47,560 Speaker 1: Mainly about Steve Burke. Nicole. 573 00:27:48,320 --> 00:27:51,280 Speaker 6: Oh, yeah, that's a crazy story. 574 00:27:51,359 --> 00:27:56,119 Speaker 7: That is a crazy story. This is wild wild. So 575 00:27:56,240 --> 00:27:58,560 Speaker 7: I actually when I met him, I took the I 576 00:27:58,600 --> 00:27:59,080 Speaker 7: took like. 577 00:27:59,119 --> 00:28:03,000 Speaker 6: An iPhone not worth of quotes that he would say, 578 00:28:03,760 --> 00:28:08,240 Speaker 6: and they're just like, you can't write dialogue that good. 579 00:28:08,359 --> 00:28:11,080 Speaker 1: It's insane. I was saying, like, we should do a movie. 580 00:28:11,080 --> 00:28:14,360 Speaker 1: They should do a movie on this whole. It's just fascinating. 581 00:28:15,320 --> 00:28:18,240 Speaker 3: Such a care also a true character character. 582 00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:23,080 Speaker 7: Yeah. He was also a very small person like his 583 00:28:23,240 --> 00:28:24,480 Speaker 7: why I like short dudes. 584 00:28:24,640 --> 00:28:25,240 Speaker 1: No, I'm kidding. 585 00:28:25,720 --> 00:28:30,000 Speaker 8: Really, everything in everything in his house was like miniature 586 00:28:30,320 --> 00:28:33,760 Speaker 8: like like it was like many slices of cheese and 587 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:38,960 Speaker 8: his refrigerator like all of that it was so I 588 00:28:39,000 --> 00:28:39,520 Speaker 8: don't know why. 589 00:28:39,600 --> 00:28:44,480 Speaker 3: This is completely this has completely changed my perspective on him. 590 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:52,960 Speaker 2: I picture him like literally three to eight with like tinyard. 591 00:28:50,640 --> 00:28:51,240 Speaker 6: In his house. 592 00:28:51,960 --> 00:28:55,320 Speaker 3: In my mind, he was a totally different type of person. 593 00:28:55,200 --> 00:28:57,840 Speaker 1: Right, No, totally like like this macho like sex and 594 00:28:57,880 --> 00:29:00,760 Speaker 1: the city that mister big Yeah, though definitely not. I 595 00:29:00,760 --> 00:29:03,080 Speaker 1: mean his voice is but he gets yeah, no. 596 00:29:03,120 --> 00:29:05,800 Speaker 2: No, it looks yeah. 597 00:29:06,440 --> 00:29:08,720 Speaker 5: I like the idea that he's that he's he's on 598 00:29:08,760 --> 00:29:11,440 Speaker 5: the shorter side and likes smaller ports. 599 00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:13,520 Speaker 1: Well, my ex husband looks. How about this. If you 600 00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:16,840 Speaker 1: look up my ex husband, he looks exactly like my father. 601 00:29:17,040 --> 00:29:19,080 Speaker 1: They look exactly like Yes. 602 00:29:19,280 --> 00:29:21,800 Speaker 5: I feel like I remember, weren't you, didn't you? Who's 603 00:29:21,800 --> 00:29:22,560 Speaker 5: your ex husband? 604 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:25,040 Speaker 1: Matthew Lawrence the Lawrence brothers? 605 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:27,960 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, okay, got it. 606 00:29:27,760 --> 00:29:29,120 Speaker 1: But like almost identical. 607 00:29:29,960 --> 00:29:32,680 Speaker 5: Really yeah, that's so crazy. 608 00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:36,080 Speaker 3: God, Nicole, where are you or are you in? Are 609 00:29:36,080 --> 00:29:36,680 Speaker 3: you in l A? 610 00:29:36,960 --> 00:29:37,200 Speaker 2: Yeah? 611 00:29:37,240 --> 00:29:38,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm in Venice? 612 00:29:39,120 --> 00:29:40,880 Speaker 3: And where where did you both grow up? 613 00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:42,560 Speaker 7: All alco? 614 00:29:44,040 --> 00:29:46,760 Speaker 3: So you were up north? And then did you Nicole? 615 00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:48,120 Speaker 3: Do you did you dance as well? 616 00:29:48,880 --> 00:29:53,520 Speaker 7: No? Not at all? Awful yeah awful dancer. 617 00:29:53,880 --> 00:29:55,640 Speaker 1: No, you were not when you were a little girl. 618 00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:57,840 Speaker 1: Mom forced you you were really cute. 619 00:29:57,960 --> 00:29:58,480 Speaker 2: I have some. 620 00:29:58,560 --> 00:30:01,360 Speaker 7: Photos of me and ballroom dance competitions. I was like 621 00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:05,120 Speaker 7: very tiny with the sequindra. 622 00:30:05,400 --> 00:30:07,479 Speaker 6: Actually, what I really used to do is when Cheryl 623 00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:11,400 Speaker 6: would go and compete, they would have like tables of 624 00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:15,480 Speaker 6: people seated around like the ballroom dance floor, and I 625 00:30:15,720 --> 00:30:19,480 Speaker 6: would go underneath the tables. I was like five six, 626 00:30:19,520 --> 00:30:22,240 Speaker 6: and I would pick up the rhinestones that had fallen 627 00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:25,120 Speaker 6: from the dresses when they were spinning, and I would 628 00:30:25,200 --> 00:30:27,920 Speaker 6: put them in like little plastic cups and make like 629 00:30:28,160 --> 00:30:31,880 Speaker 6: art pieces with the fallen feathers and rhinestones. 630 00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:32,719 Speaker 1: It's so cute. 631 00:30:32,840 --> 00:30:33,160 Speaker 2: That was. 632 00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:35,680 Speaker 1: It's kind of been way worse under that table, you know. 633 00:30:35,800 --> 00:30:40,760 Speaker 6: So people were like, oh my god, there's a I love. 634 00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,880 Speaker 3: I love that as like a cinematic visual. 635 00:30:45,200 --> 00:30:47,040 Speaker 1: We're turning into a movie. That's it. 636 00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:53,200 Speaker 2: That should be ballroom So show you were nine when 637 00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:53,800 Speaker 2: she was born. 638 00:30:54,320 --> 00:30:57,080 Speaker 1: Yeah, I begged for a little sister. 639 00:30:57,680 --> 00:30:58,080 Speaker 2: You did. 640 00:30:58,440 --> 00:31:02,280 Speaker 1: I did. I even saw Oh maybe that's Tami. Never mind, okay, 641 00:31:02,280 --> 00:31:03,760 Speaker 1: go ahead, what. 642 00:31:04,120 --> 00:31:05,000 Speaker 2: You saw her birth? 643 00:31:05,760 --> 00:31:10,320 Speaker 1: No, I saw the process prior to the birth in 644 00:31:10,360 --> 00:31:12,440 Speaker 1: the cup. When you guys do the thing in the 645 00:31:12,560 --> 00:31:13,280 Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. 646 00:31:13,920 --> 00:31:15,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, that one. 647 00:31:16,720 --> 00:31:20,400 Speaker 1: I saw her as a little you know, yeah, yes, 648 00:31:23,360 --> 00:31:27,040 Speaker 1: you like visualized her, Yes, yes I did. I manifested her. 649 00:31:27,760 --> 00:31:28,760 Speaker 3: That's so cute. 650 00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:31,360 Speaker 2: Wow. So when she was when she was born, it 651 00:31:31,400 --> 00:31:34,080 Speaker 2: must have been an incredible an incredible day. 652 00:31:34,520 --> 00:31:36,400 Speaker 1: It was. It was as if I gave birth to her. 653 00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:38,840 Speaker 1: I always say that I'm like your mother. 654 00:31:40,760 --> 00:31:43,240 Speaker 5: I felt that way with Wyatt because I have a 655 00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:46,320 Speaker 5: I have my I'm seven and a half years older 656 00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:50,200 Speaker 5: than my our younger brother, and I always felt when 657 00:31:50,240 --> 00:31:51,640 Speaker 5: he was born it was like having. 658 00:31:51,520 --> 00:31:55,200 Speaker 3: My own doll, like human doll, you know, like, oh, 659 00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:56,200 Speaker 3: I was like playing mom. 660 00:31:56,320 --> 00:31:56,480 Speaker 5: You know. 661 00:31:56,600 --> 00:31:56,880 Speaker 2: Yeah. 662 00:31:56,920 --> 00:31:58,440 Speaker 1: I would always pick her up out of the crib 663 00:31:58,480 --> 00:32:00,960 Speaker 1: when she was crying, and I didn't be leaving that rule, 664 00:32:01,040 --> 00:32:04,239 Speaker 1: like just leave her that. I'm like, that's abuse, that's abuse, Like, 665 00:32:04,360 --> 00:32:06,240 Speaker 1: no way, never happening. 666 00:32:06,960 --> 00:32:07,760 Speaker 3: Oh. 667 00:32:07,840 --> 00:32:10,560 Speaker 5: So Nicole, like, how was it for you guys growing up? 668 00:32:10,560 --> 00:32:13,080 Speaker 5: I mean that's a that's a pretty big age difference. 669 00:32:13,640 --> 00:32:15,320 Speaker 7: Yeah, yeah it was. 670 00:32:15,520 --> 00:32:15,880 Speaker 1: It was. 671 00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:23,480 Speaker 6: Uh, it was weird until like eighteen, I guess because 672 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:26,600 Speaker 6: it was just such an age gap, like Cheryl is sixteen, 673 00:32:27,160 --> 00:32:29,800 Speaker 6: you know, like when you're When she was like a teenager. 674 00:32:30,400 --> 00:32:35,480 Speaker 7: I looked like like a little doddler following her around, 675 00:32:36,160 --> 00:32:38,040 Speaker 7: like growing up. 676 00:32:38,120 --> 00:32:40,520 Speaker 6: She would like go into the kitchen and eat an orange, 677 00:32:40,520 --> 00:32:42,840 Speaker 6: and I'd like go into the kitchen and eat an orange. 678 00:32:43,080 --> 00:32:46,240 Speaker 6: You know, like you just like mimic everything that your 679 00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:50,960 Speaker 6: older sister does. But then, but then when eighteen happened, 680 00:32:50,960 --> 00:32:52,600 Speaker 6: then it was like you could start hanging out as 681 00:32:52,640 --> 00:32:55,640 Speaker 6: people and have those types of experiences. But there was 682 00:32:55,720 --> 00:32:58,840 Speaker 6: like it's such an age gap, and it's it's different for. 683 00:32:58,800 --> 00:33:01,160 Speaker 2: Sure, right because then show you left the house at 684 00:33:01,160 --> 00:33:02,280 Speaker 2: some point when you're saying. 685 00:33:02,120 --> 00:33:03,920 Speaker 1: I left when I was like eighteen seventeen. 686 00:33:04,560 --> 00:33:06,880 Speaker 3: But those are your competitive dancers, so you've probably gone 687 00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:07,360 Speaker 3: a lot. 688 00:33:07,560 --> 00:33:09,960 Speaker 1: Were you caught a lot? Yes, all over the world, 689 00:33:10,040 --> 00:33:12,640 Speaker 1: Like I spent my summers in England training like the. 690 00:33:12,560 --> 00:33:15,840 Speaker 3: Whole So you did the same kind of thing that I've. 691 00:33:15,640 --> 00:33:17,920 Speaker 1: Known Derek and julian since they were ten years old. 692 00:33:17,960 --> 00:33:19,680 Speaker 1: Like I was at her tenth I was at Julianne's 693 00:33:20,080 --> 00:33:23,880 Speaker 1: tenth birthday in England. She had she had an English accent. 694 00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:28,320 Speaker 3: I'm not kidding, that's I mean, I'm not surprised. 695 00:33:28,480 --> 00:33:30,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, no, but so were you also? 696 00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:33,040 Speaker 3: Did you also dance with Mark's mom. 697 00:33:33,720 --> 00:33:37,120 Speaker 1: Well she i for a little bit and then I 698 00:33:37,280 --> 00:33:37,880 Speaker 1: switched over. 699 00:33:38,000 --> 00:33:42,040 Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, okay, so but it was it's a different 700 00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:42,480 Speaker 3: kind of. 701 00:33:42,600 --> 00:33:44,560 Speaker 1: It's the same world though. I just I think I'm 702 00:33:44,600 --> 00:33:47,720 Speaker 1: like an eight, like maybe three four years older. But 703 00:33:47,800 --> 00:33:49,760 Speaker 1: we competed against each other. I have a picture of 704 00:33:49,840 --> 00:33:52,680 Speaker 1: us at a competition in the Bay Area, and it 705 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:54,960 Speaker 1: was like me and my partner super tall. And remember 706 00:33:55,000 --> 00:33:57,240 Speaker 1: I developed at a young age, so was like Julianne 707 00:33:57,360 --> 00:34:00,560 Speaker 1: was like she I looked like I was kind yes, 708 00:34:00,840 --> 00:34:03,320 Speaker 1: and I was like I had boobs and a waiste 709 00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:06,000 Speaker 1: in a butt and then like then there was little Derek, 710 00:34:06,040 --> 00:34:07,680 Speaker 1: little Julianne, little Mark Ballast. 711 00:34:07,840 --> 00:34:08,000 Speaker 2: You know. 712 00:34:08,120 --> 00:34:09,680 Speaker 1: It just was so crazy. 713 00:34:09,920 --> 00:34:12,320 Speaker 3: It's so crazy, it's so funny. 714 00:34:12,440 --> 00:34:16,080 Speaker 5: So so when when Nicole, when Cheryl was gone, was 715 00:34:16,120 --> 00:34:18,200 Speaker 5: that hard for you or was that just like a 716 00:34:18,239 --> 00:34:18,879 Speaker 5: normal thing. 717 00:34:19,600 --> 00:34:20,719 Speaker 7: It was a normal thing. 718 00:34:21,080 --> 00:34:24,399 Speaker 6: We made like family trips out of where her competitions were. 719 00:34:24,880 --> 00:34:27,240 Speaker 6: So like if she had a dance competition in Italy, 720 00:34:28,200 --> 00:34:30,759 Speaker 6: I've been to like random fucking places like. 721 00:34:33,480 --> 00:34:37,120 Speaker 7: Italy, like. 722 00:34:38,560 --> 00:34:40,520 Speaker 6: You know, and then I just find like really weird 723 00:34:40,560 --> 00:34:43,880 Speaker 6: ways of entertaining myself because I didn't I didn't really 724 00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:46,480 Speaker 6: like love the whole ballroom thing. So I was just 725 00:34:46,560 --> 00:34:50,040 Speaker 6: like this little kid who would just wander through these 726 00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:53,200 Speaker 6: like massive ballroom dance competitions. 727 00:34:53,160 --> 00:34:54,000 Speaker 1: Were drawn to. 728 00:34:56,200 --> 00:34:56,919 Speaker 2: What I drown. 729 00:34:57,680 --> 00:34:59,359 Speaker 3: Yeah. 730 00:34:58,960 --> 00:35:02,200 Speaker 6: I studied acting in college and right now I'm finishing 731 00:35:02,239 --> 00:35:05,000 Speaker 6: my master's in film productions. So I've always been like 732 00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:09,080 Speaker 6: creative for sure, but just wasn't into the dance thing. 733 00:35:10,960 --> 00:35:14,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, when did you guys start to get really close? 734 00:35:14,680 --> 00:35:17,800 Speaker 2: You know? I mean obviously when you're back and forth, 735 00:35:17,840 --> 00:35:19,759 Speaker 2: you're not there and there's such an edge gap. Was 736 00:35:19,800 --> 00:35:22,279 Speaker 2: there that moment where it was like, oh shit, we're 737 00:35:22,320 --> 00:35:24,680 Speaker 2: on the same We're kind of on the same level here, 738 00:35:24,840 --> 00:35:25,359 Speaker 2: you know what I mean. 739 00:35:25,640 --> 00:35:27,960 Speaker 1: It was like I would say, when we started going 740 00:35:28,000 --> 00:35:31,160 Speaker 1: on these like huge trips that I tay you on. 741 00:35:31,280 --> 00:35:33,680 Speaker 1: We went to like France, Like this was like about 742 00:35:33,880 --> 00:35:36,880 Speaker 1: what season I based my whole life off seasons? Okay, 743 00:35:36,920 --> 00:35:40,919 Speaker 1: so it was like really good seven see season seven 744 00:35:41,000 --> 00:35:44,280 Speaker 1: hundred and twelve, and that we would go to like Paris, 745 00:35:44,320 --> 00:35:46,800 Speaker 1: we went to Spain, you know. Yeah. 746 00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:50,200 Speaker 6: It was like that was around when I I graduated 747 00:35:50,320 --> 00:35:53,760 Speaker 6: high school, so like I was like seventeen or something 748 00:35:53,840 --> 00:35:57,080 Speaker 6: like that, and that's why we call each other mouse 749 00:35:57,239 --> 00:36:02,319 Speaker 6: because we we went took me to Paris and you 750 00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:05,280 Speaker 6: know that's that scene from Ratitui where the little mouse 751 00:36:05,320 --> 00:36:07,799 Speaker 6: the steering for all of Paris and the Eiffel Tower. 752 00:36:07,920 --> 00:36:10,160 Speaker 7: Yes, like we're obsessed. 753 00:36:09,680 --> 00:36:11,319 Speaker 2: With that movie so now. 754 00:36:13,000 --> 00:36:16,800 Speaker 6: And I think it was like those trips honestly. So, 755 00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,799 Speaker 6: so I was in high school and then Cheryl was 756 00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:21,800 Speaker 6: like in her you know, mid. 757 00:36:21,680 --> 00:36:25,200 Speaker 1: Trime, kidding, kidding, Yeah. 758 00:36:25,320 --> 00:36:29,440 Speaker 5: So so when Cheryl, you're twenty one, when you started 759 00:36:30,440 --> 00:36:33,080 Speaker 5: Dancing Stars, did you start out as a partner or 760 00:36:33,120 --> 00:36:35,080 Speaker 5: were you in kind of the like. 761 00:36:35,440 --> 00:36:37,360 Speaker 1: I was part I was like a pro pro dancer 762 00:36:37,440 --> 00:36:38,960 Speaker 1: right away right away. 763 00:36:39,440 --> 00:36:41,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, I feel like I remember that. 764 00:36:41,040 --> 00:36:44,520 Speaker 1: And then and then I had that was a short haircut, 765 00:36:45,000 --> 00:36:47,359 Speaker 1: like I had the dumb and dummer bangs like my uh, 766 00:36:47,719 --> 00:36:50,359 Speaker 1: dancing coach just like messed me up. 767 00:36:50,760 --> 00:36:52,920 Speaker 3: I blame him, and it just always had some. 768 00:36:53,840 --> 00:36:55,880 Speaker 1: Yes, it only looked good in movement though, But if 769 00:36:55,920 --> 00:36:57,719 Speaker 1: I was here, like having a conversation with you, it 770 00:36:57,760 --> 00:36:58,880 Speaker 1: would be quite embarrassing. 771 00:37:01,360 --> 00:37:03,759 Speaker 5: What was that like for you, Nicole, because that show 772 00:37:03,880 --> 00:37:05,480 Speaker 5: kind of like it was such a hit. 773 00:37:06,520 --> 00:37:12,439 Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like fully for votes, I love you, mom, 774 00:37:12,520 --> 00:37:12,920 Speaker 1: trained you. 775 00:37:13,000 --> 00:37:16,359 Speaker 6: Well, I remember I have like these like buttons that 776 00:37:16,440 --> 00:37:18,839 Speaker 6: had like a vote for Cheryl and Emmett on it, 777 00:37:18,920 --> 00:37:23,440 Speaker 6: and I would like Smith like middle school all the time, 778 00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:26,839 Speaker 6: so I was super into it. 779 00:37:27,719 --> 00:37:29,080 Speaker 3: Didn't you win with him at Smith? 780 00:37:29,440 --> 00:37:32,280 Speaker 1: I went with Drew Lash my very first two seasons, 781 00:37:32,280 --> 00:37:34,840 Speaker 1: I won, and then it just went downhill from there. 782 00:37:35,880 --> 00:37:37,520 Speaker 2: Do you blame every partner? 783 00:37:38,320 --> 00:37:40,960 Speaker 1: No, I blame my opinions, my mouth. 784 00:37:42,440 --> 00:37:43,240 Speaker 2: Oh really? 785 00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:47,560 Speaker 5: So, so while your sister's like dancing her heart out 786 00:37:48,200 --> 00:37:51,319 Speaker 5: and Nichole like, I'm just gonna say it, which is 787 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:55,200 Speaker 5: Cheryl You're saying like you've always struggled with addiction? Was 788 00:37:55,239 --> 00:37:58,399 Speaker 5: that something that you were aware of growing up with her? 789 00:37:58,719 --> 00:38:03,279 Speaker 5: Or well, she's working and was that something that you 790 00:38:03,320 --> 00:38:07,680 Speaker 5: know what was challenging to confront. 791 00:38:09,120 --> 00:38:13,080 Speaker 6: I think I was mildly aware of it, like you 792 00:38:13,120 --> 00:38:15,080 Speaker 6: have to think, like when she was like your first 793 00:38:15,120 --> 00:38:17,719 Speaker 6: few seasons, I was like eleven. 794 00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:18,880 Speaker 1: Oh, I was a functioning drunk. 795 00:38:19,000 --> 00:38:21,160 Speaker 7: So yeah, so I was really young. 796 00:38:21,280 --> 00:38:25,480 Speaker 6: So I don't think I understood it until or really 797 00:38:25,480 --> 00:38:28,200 Speaker 6: clocked it until I was like probably a teenager, until 798 00:38:28,200 --> 00:38:32,239 Speaker 6: I was like fifteen sixteen, and then and then it 799 00:38:32,560 --> 00:38:36,720 Speaker 6: was something I was aware of but it didn't really 800 00:38:36,760 --> 00:38:40,000 Speaker 6: seem worrisome to me until I was probably in my 801 00:38:41,160 --> 00:38:45,400 Speaker 6: I don't know, like like late teens. 802 00:38:45,239 --> 00:38:49,600 Speaker 2: Anyway, Why why why I was worriedome? What happened? 803 00:38:50,640 --> 00:38:51,200 Speaker 3: What happened? 804 00:38:51,200 --> 00:38:55,000 Speaker 7: I mean a lot, I mean a lot happened, But 805 00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,319 Speaker 7: what I don't I can't remember. It's funny, I. 806 00:38:58,239 --> 00:39:00,480 Speaker 1: Can't like when we started traveling together and stuff you 807 00:39:00,520 --> 00:39:03,320 Speaker 1: started to see. 808 00:39:02,880 --> 00:39:05,920 Speaker 6: Not really traveling. I feel like it was it was 809 00:39:05,920 --> 00:39:08,200 Speaker 6: like more because you know, I would go out with 810 00:39:08,239 --> 00:39:11,600 Speaker 6: her and her friends and I was like very underage. 811 00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:18,200 Speaker 6: I would like hand the the bouncer like. 812 00:39:18,200 --> 00:39:21,920 Speaker 1: Sher bages and bottles. We were just all up in there, had. 813 00:39:21,800 --> 00:39:26,480 Speaker 6: Like to enter the freaking bar like one, you look 814 00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,440 Speaker 6: like you're nine, and two this girl you still do 815 00:39:29,680 --> 00:39:31,680 Speaker 6: here and so it was like really but like I 816 00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:34,400 Speaker 6: didn't have a fake ID, so. 817 00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:34,279 Speaker 2: So I don't. 818 00:39:35,239 --> 00:39:38,080 Speaker 6: It was interesting to like see, you know, I would 819 00:39:38,160 --> 00:39:40,080 Speaker 6: like go to bed and they would stay. 820 00:39:39,920 --> 00:39:43,800 Speaker 7: Up all night, and I was like, yep, the totally 821 00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:45,600 Speaker 7: normal no. 822 00:39:45,760 --> 00:39:48,799 Speaker 6: So yeah, I got little glimpses of it then and 823 00:39:48,800 --> 00:39:50,840 Speaker 6: and maybe also on the trips, but it's hard to 824 00:39:50,840 --> 00:39:53,000 Speaker 6: say if there was like a moment because I think 825 00:39:53,040 --> 00:39:55,279 Speaker 6: when it's your sibling, you don't really think like. 826 00:39:55,640 --> 00:39:58,120 Speaker 1: Well, also know, I wasn't very educated about addiction. I 827 00:39:58,160 --> 00:39:59,960 Speaker 1: don't think we were like we didn't put the work 828 00:40:00,160 --> 00:40:03,680 Speaker 1: to the action, I guess, yeah, yeah. 829 00:40:03,719 --> 00:40:06,920 Speaker 7: And it was also just got normalized with like what 830 00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:08,359 Speaker 7: all of her friends were doing. 831 00:40:08,440 --> 00:40:10,640 Speaker 1: Well, I was a ballroom dancer by day and a 832 00:40:10,680 --> 00:40:14,120 Speaker 1: partier bitches and bottles at night. Like I literally it 833 00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:17,319 Speaker 1: was seven nights a week. And because I was functioning. 834 00:40:17,719 --> 00:40:19,840 Speaker 1: That's the scariest I think of with them all is 835 00:40:19,880 --> 00:40:22,719 Speaker 1: that no one knew and people when I wasn't kind 836 00:40:22,719 --> 00:40:24,400 Speaker 1: of out of it, people were like, what's wrong with you? 837 00:40:24,760 --> 00:40:27,200 Speaker 1: And I'm like, yeah, see, I gotta just continue on 838 00:40:27,239 --> 00:40:28,160 Speaker 1: with the vodka sodas. 839 00:40:28,320 --> 00:40:30,799 Speaker 2: You were functioning in the sense that you could just 840 00:40:30,880 --> 00:40:34,520 Speaker 2: live your life and have your day. Yeah yeah, Then 841 00:40:34,640 --> 00:40:37,399 Speaker 2: what what was the trigger where it was like, holy shit, 842 00:40:38,040 --> 00:40:40,000 Speaker 2: you know I'm an alcoholic. 843 00:40:40,600 --> 00:40:43,960 Speaker 1: It was my father dying, Like his passing really woke 844 00:40:44,080 --> 00:40:47,160 Speaker 1: me up. I also was, like I said, just engaged. 845 00:40:48,080 --> 00:40:50,440 Speaker 1: And then I realized that like I was going to 846 00:40:50,480 --> 00:40:53,680 Speaker 1: fall down this rabbit hole and most likely have to 847 00:40:53,760 --> 00:40:57,160 Speaker 1: check myself into rehab or just stop. And I didn't 848 00:40:57,160 --> 00:41:00,480 Speaker 1: tell anybody at all. Actually when I decided to stop, 849 00:41:00,520 --> 00:41:03,000 Speaker 1: because I never stopped, so I never went one day 850 00:41:03,040 --> 00:41:06,839 Speaker 1: without alcohol from when I would say around twenty one 851 00:41:06,880 --> 00:41:09,120 Speaker 1: to twenty two up until five and a half years ago, 852 00:41:09,239 --> 00:41:12,799 Speaker 1: like it was seven days a week never, I don't 853 00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:15,279 Speaker 1: think so, I mean not never. I mean maybe like 854 00:41:15,320 --> 00:41:17,439 Speaker 1: the days where I was so hung open, I think 855 00:41:17,880 --> 00:41:21,399 Speaker 1: I might be accurate. No, I really like I. 856 00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:22,640 Speaker 3: Think she was actually drinking. 857 00:41:22,680 --> 00:41:26,440 Speaker 1: Maybe, like I just put like my tolerance for alcohol, 858 00:41:26,560 --> 00:41:28,719 Speaker 1: that's the thing, And I think maybe I don't know. Look, 859 00:41:28,719 --> 00:41:31,160 Speaker 1: I keep going back whether addiction is hereditary or not. 860 00:41:31,360 --> 00:41:33,120 Speaker 1: I mean, I don't know. I know a lot of 861 00:41:33,120 --> 00:41:35,400 Speaker 1: people who don't have any of that in their family 862 00:41:35,480 --> 00:41:38,759 Speaker 1: and they suffer from the disease. But like I just 863 00:41:38,840 --> 00:41:41,360 Speaker 1: held my alcohol and there was it came to a 864 00:41:41,400 --> 00:41:43,560 Speaker 1: point too where it was like there's not much more 865 00:41:43,560 --> 00:41:46,320 Speaker 1: I could drink and I felt nothing. 866 00:41:46,680 --> 00:41:49,640 Speaker 2: You know, So were you waking up and boozing? 867 00:41:50,560 --> 00:41:54,759 Speaker 1: I was no, no, no, no, no, definitely not no. 868 00:41:55,160 --> 00:41:59,040 Speaker 3: But it never affected your relationship together you and I. 869 00:41:59,040 --> 00:42:00,640 Speaker 1: Oh no, did it I. 870 00:42:00,640 --> 00:42:01,280 Speaker 3: Think it did. 871 00:42:01,600 --> 00:42:03,920 Speaker 7: I don't think it did. I just remember when you 872 00:42:04,040 --> 00:42:05,800 Speaker 7: stopped you it. 873 00:42:05,680 --> 00:42:07,719 Speaker 6: Was like the funniest thing because it was it was 874 00:42:07,719 --> 00:42:10,000 Speaker 6: actually I think the night of your engagement party or 875 00:42:10,040 --> 00:42:12,200 Speaker 6: like the day, yes it was. Yeah, you were like, 876 00:42:12,520 --> 00:42:15,000 Speaker 6: I don't know what's going on, but if I drink alcohol, 877 00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:15,960 Speaker 6: I get hives. 878 00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:17,840 Speaker 1: So I stopped for vanity reasons. 879 00:42:17,880 --> 00:42:20,799 Speaker 6: And then so she was breaking out, like her neck 880 00:42:20,840 --> 00:42:24,920 Speaker 6: and her under her eyes face these red spots and 881 00:42:24,960 --> 00:42:26,560 Speaker 6: so like, I think the last time I've ever seen 882 00:42:26,600 --> 00:42:29,720 Speaker 6: you with like a sip of alcohol was that engagement party. 883 00:42:29,760 --> 00:42:31,239 Speaker 6: And then from then on it was just like, no, 884 00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:31,919 Speaker 6: it gives me hives. 885 00:42:31,960 --> 00:42:32,680 Speaker 7: No, it gives me hives. 886 00:42:32,880 --> 00:42:35,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, thank God for that, because yeah. 887 00:42:35,640 --> 00:42:37,359 Speaker 6: Months and months later then it was like no, I'm 888 00:42:37,440 --> 00:42:40,359 Speaker 6: I'm sober because I know. So it was like it 889 00:42:40,480 --> 00:42:42,640 Speaker 6: kind of happened in an interesting. 890 00:42:42,200 --> 00:42:44,719 Speaker 1: Way, but like, yeah, you know, also no judgment for 891 00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:47,160 Speaker 1: the way it happens. Just like no, I mean, thank 892 00:42:47,160 --> 00:42:48,920 Speaker 1: God for that to happen. I think it was I 893 00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:51,440 Speaker 1: think the poison. My body was rejecting the poison. I 894 00:42:51,520 --> 00:42:54,719 Speaker 1: mean eventually, right, So I also think part of that 895 00:42:54,800 --> 00:42:57,600 Speaker 1: We're Asian too, though I do like, no, no, I 896 00:42:57,680 --> 00:42:58,960 Speaker 1: never was that a type of Asian. 897 00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:03,880 Speaker 5: I was were red. I was never man my man's 898 00:43:03,880 --> 00:43:09,040 Speaker 5: that type of Asian. Really, yeah, he gets red, he 899 00:43:09,160 --> 00:43:13,919 Speaker 5: gets super red. It hurt, you know, it's like he's 900 00:43:13,960 --> 00:43:16,400 Speaker 5: like he always says, it feels like it feels like 901 00:43:16,400 --> 00:43:18,520 Speaker 5: an allergic reaction in skin. 902 00:43:18,600 --> 00:43:19,680 Speaker 3: It's like hot for him. 903 00:43:19,719 --> 00:43:21,799 Speaker 1: Maybe that's what I just maybe that's why. And maybe 904 00:43:21,800 --> 00:43:23,960 Speaker 1: you're right, Nicole, No, I I mean I. 905 00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:24,879 Speaker 7: Get flushed too. 906 00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:27,640 Speaker 6: That's why I don't drink very much red wine, like 907 00:43:27,640 --> 00:43:31,279 Speaker 6: like it's the real thing, and there'thing Asian genetics and 908 00:43:31,320 --> 00:43:33,120 Speaker 6: there's like an enzyme that helps you break down that 909 00:43:33,200 --> 00:43:34,200 Speaker 6: alcohol and if you're. 910 00:43:34,040 --> 00:43:36,520 Speaker 1: Asian, but like deeper than that though, I think it 911 00:43:36,600 --> 00:43:38,200 Speaker 1: was my I think I was just the trauma in 912 00:43:38,239 --> 00:43:41,239 Speaker 1: my body, like you know, there was not much more 913 00:43:41,280 --> 00:43:41,920 Speaker 1: I could numb. 914 00:43:43,239 --> 00:43:45,000 Speaker 2: Yeah, really yeah. 915 00:43:45,040 --> 00:43:47,879 Speaker 5: So do you do you guys fight or is your 916 00:43:47,920 --> 00:43:49,359 Speaker 5: relationship pretty. 917 00:43:50,560 --> 00:43:53,919 Speaker 3: Sweet? And can we fight? We fight? 918 00:43:54,040 --> 00:43:57,160 Speaker 6: I feel like our relationship is pretty sweet, and then 919 00:43:57,160 --> 00:43:58,760 Speaker 6: when you fight, it's really bad. 920 00:43:59,320 --> 00:43:59,879 Speaker 2: It's bad. 921 00:44:00,160 --> 00:44:01,919 Speaker 1: It's so sad. It ruins my life. 922 00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:07,279 Speaker 6: I can't I get like, like when we do fight, 923 00:44:07,400 --> 00:44:10,680 Speaker 6: it's like periods of time where we don't talk, and 924 00:44:10,719 --> 00:44:13,160 Speaker 6: it'll be like somewhere between a few days and maybe 925 00:44:13,200 --> 00:44:15,600 Speaker 6: like two weeks, and during those two weeks, like I 926 00:44:15,680 --> 00:44:19,320 Speaker 6: can't sleep as well, Like my heart is like fluttering 927 00:44:19,480 --> 00:44:22,120 Speaker 6: a lot of you know, like you're like you get 928 00:44:22,120 --> 00:44:24,560 Speaker 6: like dumb or your like heartache or something like. 929 00:44:24,560 --> 00:44:30,320 Speaker 7: That, kind of like Withdred it doesn't happen very often. 930 00:44:30,560 --> 00:44:32,400 Speaker 2: Yeah, so then why not just pick up the phone. 931 00:44:32,600 --> 00:44:34,279 Speaker 2: Who's the stubborn one? And that me? 932 00:44:35,320 --> 00:44:36,759 Speaker 1: I think it's a little bit of both of us 933 00:44:36,800 --> 00:44:38,560 Speaker 1: to be I'm stubborn too. 934 00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:41,360 Speaker 2: Yeah, what are you fighting about? 935 00:44:42,200 --> 00:44:44,239 Speaker 1: You know? Family dynamics? 936 00:44:44,440 --> 00:44:45,840 Speaker 2: Like bullshit stuff. 937 00:44:46,760 --> 00:44:48,839 Speaker 1: I mean it's all bullshit really at the end of it, right, 938 00:44:48,880 --> 00:44:51,680 Speaker 1: life is so fucking short. It's like what are you 939 00:44:51,800 --> 00:44:53,879 Speaker 1: What are we even fighting about? For real? Like who 940 00:44:54,080 --> 00:44:57,480 Speaker 1: We're so focused on something that makes no sense. In 941 00:44:57,520 --> 00:44:59,200 Speaker 1: about a year or two from now, we'll be laughing 942 00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,760 Speaker 1: about it, you know, but like it's horrible. 943 00:45:01,960 --> 00:45:04,799 Speaker 2: I've been on this whole trip, Like I know it's 944 00:45:05,120 --> 00:45:07,080 Speaker 2: you know, I go through my have anxiety and I'm 945 00:45:07,120 --> 00:45:09,800 Speaker 2: on lipoto or lexapro and blah blah blah, you know, 946 00:45:10,400 --> 00:45:13,359 Speaker 2: and I got the kids in a life can be 947 00:45:13,400 --> 00:45:16,880 Speaker 2: so fucking overwhelming, And then you think in probably one 948 00:45:16,920 --> 00:45:18,759 Speaker 2: hundred million years from now, it's just going to be 949 00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:22,160 Speaker 2: a big ball of fire this earth. So why do 950 00:45:22,280 --> 00:45:25,600 Speaker 2: I give a shit? Right, why do we care so much? 951 00:45:26,080 --> 00:45:28,320 Speaker 2: None of it really is going to matter. At the 952 00:45:28,400 --> 00:45:30,680 Speaker 2: end of the day, men, bro a, We're all going 953 00:45:30,680 --> 00:45:34,240 Speaker 2: to be dead. Human civilization will no longer fucking exist. 954 00:45:34,400 --> 00:45:37,120 Speaker 1: So what is time? There's a ticking bomb, Like we're 955 00:45:37,160 --> 00:45:39,359 Speaker 1: just like literally like we're just waiting here. 956 00:45:39,880 --> 00:45:40,239 Speaker 2: That's it. 957 00:45:40,640 --> 00:45:42,160 Speaker 3: This is all very true. 958 00:45:42,480 --> 00:45:45,680 Speaker 5: There is an actual scientific reason for this. I mean, 959 00:45:46,239 --> 00:45:50,160 Speaker 5: what you're saying is very rational and makes sense, and 960 00:45:50,200 --> 00:45:53,200 Speaker 5: therefore you would think and I think that too. When people, 961 00:45:53,560 --> 00:45:57,560 Speaker 5: as we know, actively live in that frame of mind 962 00:45:57,600 --> 00:45:59,520 Speaker 5: they call it like a lot of stoics are like that, 963 00:45:59,600 --> 00:46:02,879 Speaker 5: where they think more practically about like, well, we're gonna die, 964 00:46:02,920 --> 00:46:03,880 Speaker 5: so today might as. 965 00:46:03,719 --> 00:46:04,920 Speaker 3: Well be great. 966 00:46:07,080 --> 00:46:09,719 Speaker 5: And then also we know that gratitude allows us to 967 00:46:09,840 --> 00:46:13,319 Speaker 5: like not have that kind of live in that kind 968 00:46:13,320 --> 00:46:17,320 Speaker 5: of chaos or anxiety the other But but the reality 969 00:46:17,360 --> 00:46:19,960 Speaker 5: is is we're just programmed to be negative bias. Our 970 00:46:20,000 --> 00:46:24,000 Speaker 5: brains are just programmed to be negative yeah, biased. So everything, 971 00:46:24,800 --> 00:46:28,200 Speaker 5: it's like the most bizarre things become these sort of 972 00:46:28,280 --> 00:46:32,879 Speaker 5: like survival instincts that have no use to us. 973 00:46:32,960 --> 00:46:34,680 Speaker 3: But our brain is like totally. 974 00:46:34,880 --> 00:46:39,400 Speaker 1: Brain is like, but we don't listen to our bodies. 975 00:46:39,520 --> 00:46:43,160 Speaker 1: Like our body is the most intelligent you know, thing 976 00:46:43,280 --> 00:46:46,600 Speaker 1: we each have. Yet I still I can speak for myself, 977 00:46:46,760 --> 00:46:49,879 Speaker 1: still follow whatever my brain thinks. It's no, it knows better, right, 978 00:46:49,960 --> 00:46:53,719 Speaker 1: but like, really the intuition is so powerful and you're right, like, 979 00:46:54,040 --> 00:46:56,600 Speaker 1: but what is the how do you retrain the brain? 980 00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:58,440 Speaker 1: You know? And also your brain doesn't know the difference 981 00:46:58,440 --> 00:47:00,919 Speaker 1: between a lie and the truth, and it's like what 982 00:47:00,960 --> 00:47:03,480 Speaker 1: the fuck? You're like, wait, yeah, and then you believe 983 00:47:03,520 --> 00:47:05,960 Speaker 1: your thoughts and they're not even the reality. And then 984 00:47:06,000 --> 00:47:07,399 Speaker 1: how you go in this suit? 985 00:47:08,480 --> 00:47:11,319 Speaker 2: That's CBT, that's cognitiavioral therapy right there. 986 00:47:11,480 --> 00:47:14,640 Speaker 5: That's why I say when people ask about happiness or 987 00:47:14,760 --> 00:47:17,640 Speaker 5: joy or like optimism, it's like this, these are all 988 00:47:17,680 --> 00:47:18,799 Speaker 5: active pursuits. 989 00:47:19,160 --> 00:47:22,359 Speaker 3: Yes, there's no like passive happiness. 990 00:47:22,440 --> 00:47:25,440 Speaker 1: I mean there can be well, right, but it's not consistent. 991 00:47:25,520 --> 00:47:27,479 Speaker 1: How No, We're like. 992 00:47:27,360 --> 00:47:30,640 Speaker 3: We're just literally not programmed to be well. 993 00:47:30,840 --> 00:47:36,000 Speaker 2: If you think about it moments, our default is fear. 994 00:47:36,239 --> 00:47:40,520 Speaker 2: Our primate fault is fear. That's that's why we have survived. 995 00:47:40,760 --> 00:47:43,560 Speaker 1: Like I'm addicted to fight flight our freeze because that's 996 00:47:43,600 --> 00:47:46,600 Speaker 1: all I know, right, Like really, if you think about 997 00:47:46,600 --> 00:47:49,160 Speaker 1: every like the timeline of what has happened, and when 998 00:47:49,200 --> 00:47:51,839 Speaker 1: I don't have it, it's almost like I'm addicted to 999 00:47:52,000 --> 00:47:54,239 Speaker 1: stress in that sense, because then I don't feel like 1000 00:47:55,120 --> 00:47:57,719 Speaker 1: if I'm not stressed, then I'm lazy. Right, there's no 1001 00:47:57,840 --> 00:48:00,439 Speaker 1: like gray area with me in my brain. But then, 1002 00:48:00,560 --> 00:48:03,160 Speaker 1: like I realized, when it comes to happiness, my goal 1003 00:48:03,200 --> 00:48:06,440 Speaker 1: is never to be happy. It's to be content, like 1004 00:48:06,600 --> 00:48:10,600 Speaker 1: actually content, because like that is happiness is like and 1005 00:48:10,640 --> 00:48:13,080 Speaker 1: I'm not. I'd like to say I'm not a fake person. 1006 00:48:13,239 --> 00:48:15,560 Speaker 1: So it's like I can't fake that, Like I just can't. 1007 00:48:16,080 --> 00:48:16,640 Speaker 2: And I'm with you. 1008 00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:26,759 Speaker 5: I'm going to give you another word that maybe you 1009 00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:30,000 Speaker 5: want to meditate on, liberated. 1010 00:48:30,920 --> 00:48:31,400 Speaker 1: Interesting. 1011 00:48:31,800 --> 00:48:33,480 Speaker 2: And then I want to give you another article I've 1012 00:48:33,480 --> 00:48:36,120 Speaker 2: been reading. 1013 00:48:35,080 --> 00:48:35,600 Speaker 1: Yes, I. 1014 00:48:37,600 --> 00:48:40,680 Speaker 2: Just sent it to my family. Lazy brain, lazy people, 1015 00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:43,120 Speaker 2: it's a sign of high high intelligence. 1016 00:48:45,640 --> 00:48:47,760 Speaker 1: Shut up procrastination. 1017 00:48:48,320 --> 00:48:55,120 Speaker 2: So I live on this meme, Kate, it's not it's 1018 00:48:55,120 --> 00:48:56,879 Speaker 2: not a meme, it's an article. And why it made 1019 00:48:56,880 --> 00:48:59,560 Speaker 2: the funniest joy joke My our brother goes your price 1020 00:48:59,640 --> 00:49:01,879 Speaker 2: so late that you just read the headline I'm like. 1021 00:49:01,960 --> 00:49:05,360 Speaker 3: I did, Oh my god, I didn't. 1022 00:49:05,160 --> 00:49:07,520 Speaker 2: Even read the article, but the article was from a 1023 00:49:07,560 --> 00:49:11,080 Speaker 2: reputable magazine. Lazy people. 1024 00:49:13,600 --> 00:49:16,120 Speaker 1: Said that I would love to I will, I will 1025 00:49:16,320 --> 00:49:17,120 Speaker 1: the full article. 1026 00:49:18,400 --> 00:49:23,280 Speaker 2: So crazy, nobody, but the human condition is just so fascinating. 1027 00:49:23,480 --> 00:49:25,520 Speaker 2: I mean, at the end of the day, we have 1028 00:49:25,640 --> 00:49:28,080 Speaker 2: all been the therapy for a million years, but it's 1029 00:49:28,200 --> 00:49:31,080 Speaker 2: so fucking interesting to try to unders I. 1030 00:49:31,040 --> 00:49:33,120 Speaker 1: Mean, they don't even know the therapists don't even know 1031 00:49:33,320 --> 00:49:36,520 Speaker 1: the whole the actual dynamics in the brain. 1032 00:49:36,600 --> 00:49:36,920 Speaker 2: No one. 1033 00:49:37,080 --> 00:49:39,360 Speaker 1: I mean, so everybody's complicated. 1034 00:49:39,360 --> 00:49:43,239 Speaker 3: We're learning. It's a constant. It's a constant. You know, 1035 00:49:43,920 --> 00:49:47,160 Speaker 3: it's constantly changing battle. 1036 00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:51,879 Speaker 5: Yeah or yeah or or you know, you know you're 1037 00:49:51,920 --> 00:49:55,279 Speaker 5: a dancer, Like that is a great metaphor for life, Like, 1038 00:49:55,360 --> 00:49:59,920 Speaker 5: in order to feel that uninhibited freedom with your body, 1039 00:50:00,080 --> 00:50:02,440 Speaker 5: you have to go through so much training and so 1040 00:50:02,600 --> 00:50:05,160 Speaker 5: much discipline, and a lot of pain goes. 1041 00:50:04,960 --> 00:50:08,439 Speaker 1: With that, and you have to let go and all 1042 00:50:08,480 --> 00:50:08,680 Speaker 1: of it. 1043 00:50:08,719 --> 00:50:10,759 Speaker 5: And then when you when you're when you've got all 1044 00:50:10,800 --> 00:50:12,520 Speaker 5: that discipline and you've done it, and then all of 1045 00:50:12,520 --> 00:50:16,000 Speaker 5: a sudden, you're like actually dancing and you're in it. 1046 00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:19,359 Speaker 5: Everything else goes away and you. You're totally free, your 1047 00:50:19,400 --> 00:50:20,080 Speaker 5: body's free. 1048 00:50:20,400 --> 00:50:23,000 Speaker 1: You do hit the fourth state of consciousness. I totally 1049 00:50:23,040 --> 00:50:24,880 Speaker 1: believe that because it's like when people are like I 1050 00:50:24,920 --> 00:50:27,560 Speaker 1: have an outer body experience, but that's what it is, right. 1051 00:50:27,719 --> 00:50:29,640 Speaker 1: But to lead up to that was a lot. 1052 00:50:29,800 --> 00:50:32,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think life, that's just life. That's the same thing. 1053 00:50:32,680 --> 00:50:32,880 Speaker 5: You know. 1054 00:50:33,840 --> 00:50:36,120 Speaker 2: I was in a hip hop dance crew called the 1055 00:50:36,440 --> 00:50:40,720 Speaker 2: Rice Rice Crispy, Snap, Crackle and Pop. 1056 00:50:42,200 --> 00:50:43,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, we talked about it a lot of. 1057 00:50:45,920 --> 00:50:48,160 Speaker 2: People. People want to know, you know, I mean I 1058 00:50:48,280 --> 00:50:52,560 Speaker 2: was I trained again named Logic came over and like, 1059 00:50:52,600 --> 00:50:54,720 Speaker 2: we like practiced before we went out to the clubs. 1060 00:50:55,520 --> 00:50:57,160 Speaker 1: Do you have any VHS tape? 1061 00:50:58,239 --> 00:50:59,920 Speaker 2: But I wish we did. We would go to battle 1062 00:51:00,040 --> 00:51:02,279 Speaker 2: all these other crews and like the little. 1063 00:51:02,719 --> 00:51:04,760 Speaker 1: That's are you serious? 1064 00:51:06,560 --> 00:51:06,799 Speaker 3: Yes? 1065 00:51:07,040 --> 00:51:08,800 Speaker 1: Are you a good dancer? Is he a dancer? 1066 00:51:09,680 --> 00:51:10,760 Speaker 3: Oliver a good dancer? 1067 00:51:11,200 --> 00:51:15,799 Speaker 2: Okay, well, I'm untrained. Incredible. 1068 00:51:16,960 --> 00:51:18,000 Speaker 1: I think you've got talent. 1069 00:51:18,719 --> 00:51:21,160 Speaker 2: I can move, I can move dancing with. 1070 00:51:21,120 --> 00:51:23,719 Speaker 3: The stars that by the end of it, he'd have 1071 00:51:23,800 --> 00:51:24,759 Speaker 3: a lot of progress. 1072 00:51:25,160 --> 00:51:28,640 Speaker 1: Oh, you can't be lazy. 1073 00:51:29,200 --> 00:51:31,120 Speaker 2: I'm not just saying this is a joke. I think 1074 00:51:31,120 --> 00:51:31,839 Speaker 2: I could win it. 1075 00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:36,480 Speaker 1: Okay, down buddy, calm down, I really do. Let me 1076 00:51:36,560 --> 00:51:39,879 Speaker 1: tell you something. I will train you. Okay, I will 1077 00:51:39,880 --> 00:51:42,000 Speaker 1: never come out of retirement, but I will train you. 1078 00:51:42,040 --> 00:51:43,759 Speaker 1: And you tell me if you think you'll win. 1079 00:51:44,280 --> 00:51:45,960 Speaker 2: I swear to God I think I can win it 1080 00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:50,239 Speaker 2: because I have natural ability my body. The problem is right, No, 1081 00:51:50,480 --> 00:51:51,000 Speaker 2: what do you mean? 1082 00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:54,640 Speaker 1: Because it ain't natural? Ballroom dancing is definitely not natural. 1083 00:51:55,080 --> 00:51:59,920 Speaker 3: Definitely stiff, stiff, got. 1084 00:51:59,800 --> 00:52:07,759 Speaker 5: A like I could put the that's wait your leg? Yeah? 1085 00:52:08,840 --> 00:52:10,319 Speaker 1: Can you imagine it's a leg? 1086 00:52:12,560 --> 00:52:16,200 Speaker 7: Up so quickly I'm certain that I thought. 1087 00:52:16,040 --> 00:52:23,120 Speaker 1: That was like, yeah, no, that is not your leg. 1088 00:52:23,400 --> 00:52:23,759 Speaker 1: Is that not? 1089 00:52:23,880 --> 00:52:26,080 Speaker 2: That's not your leg, that's my legs? 1090 00:52:26,239 --> 00:52:28,320 Speaker 1: Stop it, No, it ain't it. 1091 00:52:28,320 --> 00:52:31,279 Speaker 2: There's no way that is my leg. Wait. 1092 00:52:31,400 --> 00:52:35,280 Speaker 1: First of all, that is you're more flexible than men. 1093 00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:36,839 Speaker 2: This is what I'm saying. 1094 00:52:37,080 --> 00:52:38,920 Speaker 3: Mobility is crazy. 1095 00:52:40,200 --> 00:52:43,239 Speaker 5: Is it really like he can only move them my 1096 00:52:43,400 --> 00:52:45,799 Speaker 5: leg He can't move them front and back. 1097 00:52:48,640 --> 00:52:49,760 Speaker 1: It looks like a mannequin. 1098 00:52:49,840 --> 00:52:50,480 Speaker 2: To stop it. 1099 00:52:50,560 --> 00:52:51,399 Speaker 1: That's not your leg. 1100 00:52:52,160 --> 00:52:52,640 Speaker 6: That is. 1101 00:52:54,480 --> 00:52:58,040 Speaker 2: No. I swear God, very flexible man, It's just the 1102 00:52:58,040 --> 00:52:58,600 Speaker 2: way it is. 1103 00:52:58,760 --> 00:53:00,880 Speaker 3: This has been so much fun. Ship Eryl. Your life 1104 00:53:01,000 --> 00:53:06,440 Speaker 3: is Cheryl, Your life is colorfil Thanks and I'm. 1105 00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:10,320 Speaker 5: So grateful that you're so open and sharing those things. 1106 00:53:10,480 --> 00:53:12,839 Speaker 5: I always think that when people are really open about 1107 00:53:12,880 --> 00:53:16,040 Speaker 5: their lives, that they've experienced all of the things like 1108 00:53:16,080 --> 00:53:16,920 Speaker 5: you've experienced. 1109 00:53:16,920 --> 00:53:18,800 Speaker 3: It's so helpful to so many people. 1110 00:53:18,920 --> 00:53:19,439 Speaker 1: Thank you. 1111 00:53:20,040 --> 00:53:22,680 Speaker 5: So it's so nice that you're But let's can we 1112 00:53:22,719 --> 00:53:25,359 Speaker 5: do a little bit of the rapid fire before. 1113 00:53:25,080 --> 00:53:27,719 Speaker 1: We end love? Rapid fire? 1114 00:53:28,520 --> 00:53:30,640 Speaker 3: Okay? Who's the better cook? 1115 00:53:31,440 --> 00:53:37,040 Speaker 1: Nicole? Actually I took up banking recently. I'm fucking good. Yes, 1116 00:53:39,920 --> 00:53:40,239 Speaker 1: I don't know. 1117 00:53:40,800 --> 00:53:43,760 Speaker 3: Okay, what is your favorite trait about your sister? 1118 00:53:44,280 --> 00:53:45,319 Speaker 1: Which one? Who are you talking to? 1119 00:53:46,360 --> 00:53:46,759 Speaker 2: Both of you? 1120 00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:47,720 Speaker 1: Go ahead? 1121 00:53:47,760 --> 00:53:48,040 Speaker 6: Mouse? 1122 00:53:50,440 --> 00:53:57,400 Speaker 7: Oh, super loyal, the most person m m person? 1123 00:53:57,480 --> 00:54:02,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, period, And for me it would be how she 1124 00:54:03,200 --> 00:54:06,080 Speaker 1: just has this excitement and happiness for life. 1125 00:54:06,640 --> 00:54:14,359 Speaker 5: Oh okay, if you were gonna rob a bank? Hell, 1126 00:54:14,440 --> 00:54:17,360 Speaker 5: y ever, who would rob the bank? 1127 00:54:17,400 --> 00:54:18,879 Speaker 3: And who would drive the getaway car? 1128 00:54:19,480 --> 00:54:23,440 Speaker 1: Both? I do both? Okay, Cheryl does vote? 1129 00:54:23,800 --> 00:54:24,040 Speaker 2: Thanks? 1130 00:54:24,440 --> 00:54:27,319 Speaker 7: I actually feel like sure definitely drive the getaway car. 1131 00:54:27,600 --> 00:54:30,600 Speaker 1: Hell, yes, absolutely so? 1132 00:54:30,680 --> 00:54:33,520 Speaker 5: Nicholes, Like Nicole, you're like in a van with an 1133 00:54:33,560 --> 00:54:35,879 Speaker 5: ear wig, like with a thing like talking to her 1134 00:54:35,920 --> 00:54:37,000 Speaker 5: from the van kind of thing. 1135 00:54:39,440 --> 00:54:41,480 Speaker 1: Would I would be the race car driver. I've always 1136 00:54:41,480 --> 00:54:42,960 Speaker 1: wanted to be wanded. I'm pretty good. 1137 00:54:43,239 --> 00:54:44,920 Speaker 2: I feel like Nicole would be in the bank, like 1138 00:54:44,960 --> 00:54:49,000 Speaker 2: distracting people like she's kind of funny with their kindness, 1139 00:54:49,000 --> 00:54:51,480 Speaker 2: and she's she's witty and funny, and she'd be like, 1140 00:54:51,520 --> 00:54:54,360 Speaker 2: oh and then you know, totally that's what happened. 1141 00:54:54,560 --> 00:54:56,759 Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely we should try it. 1142 00:54:57,120 --> 00:55:00,400 Speaker 2: Who is your What about your first celebrity crush? 1143 00:55:00,480 --> 00:55:02,560 Speaker 1: Well? I wasn't allowed to watch TV, but the only 1144 00:55:02,600 --> 00:55:05,799 Speaker 1: hour I watched was nine O the original back in 1145 00:55:05,840 --> 00:55:11,880 Speaker 1: the nineties. It was obviously Luke Perry. I slept on 1146 00:55:11,920 --> 00:55:21,600 Speaker 1: his face. I had bed sheets where in my dream? 1147 00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:23,560 Speaker 2: I guess. 1148 00:55:24,760 --> 00:55:26,560 Speaker 3: Nicole Aaron Carter? 1149 00:55:27,560 --> 00:55:36,239 Speaker 1: Oh, yes, sorry, I shouldn't be laughed. Sorry, so uncomfortable. 1150 00:55:38,280 --> 00:55:39,920 Speaker 3: That's that's right there, Boat. 1151 00:55:39,840 --> 00:55:44,319 Speaker 1: Aaron really mouse, I had no idea Aaron or Nick Aaron? Right? 1152 00:55:48,239 --> 00:55:50,560 Speaker 1: Which they both did Dancing with the Stars? 1153 00:55:51,080 --> 00:55:51,760 Speaker 2: Oh really? 1154 00:55:52,719 --> 00:55:52,919 Speaker 6: Yeah? 1155 00:55:55,840 --> 00:56:02,480 Speaker 5: Okay, guys, what was what was your like childhood song? Like, like, like, 1156 00:56:02,520 --> 00:56:05,560 Speaker 5: what was the song that was like, oh, this was 1157 00:56:05,600 --> 00:56:06,840 Speaker 5: my song like my child. 1158 00:56:06,719 --> 00:56:12,719 Speaker 2: Like Kate's was Brian Adams, you know, like, okay, yeah. 1159 00:56:12,200 --> 00:56:17,200 Speaker 1: Which was I I love that song? 1160 00:56:17,320 --> 00:56:18,960 Speaker 3: Yes, Kate's song? Great? 1161 00:56:19,000 --> 00:56:19,200 Speaker 1: Song. 1162 00:56:20,360 --> 00:56:23,840 Speaker 3: It was like Van Halen Jump Oka. 1163 00:56:24,960 --> 00:56:27,000 Speaker 2: You were young young when Jump was. 1164 00:56:26,960 --> 00:56:30,719 Speaker 1: Around first there was to be forty remember. 1165 00:56:30,440 --> 00:56:32,520 Speaker 2: Them Amazing Red Red. 1166 00:56:33,800 --> 00:56:35,799 Speaker 1: But I would say it was like my eighth grade 1167 00:56:35,800 --> 00:56:39,680 Speaker 1: graduation was like Green Day, you know that song. Yeah, yeah, 1168 00:56:40,239 --> 00:56:43,120 Speaker 1: but it was Atlantis Morissette, I love her still do. 1169 00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:45,640 Speaker 3: Jag a Little Pill. That was game changer. 1170 00:56:46,400 --> 00:56:48,880 Speaker 1: In my spinner, my CD spinner, I had like Doctor 1171 00:56:48,960 --> 00:56:56,760 Speaker 1: Dre with the freaking Wet the Leaf, like yeah c LC. 1172 00:56:57,360 --> 00:57:01,680 Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah, this time. 1173 00:57:01,840 --> 00:57:05,600 Speaker 3: My language that music though you're nine years younger. 1174 00:57:06,080 --> 00:57:08,560 Speaker 7: It was really embarrassing. It was Nickelback. 1175 00:57:09,320 --> 00:57:16,760 Speaker 6: Yeah, you know that's some photography, of course. 1176 00:57:16,520 --> 00:57:20,760 Speaker 3: But those guys are really nice. We we didn't we 1177 00:57:20,800 --> 00:57:23,840 Speaker 3: interview them, they were on the show. They were so nice. 1178 00:57:23,880 --> 00:57:27,400 Speaker 5: Yeah that was Nickelback, right, Yeah, it's like they were 1179 00:57:27,400 --> 00:57:30,600 Speaker 5: actually really great. I was like god, you know, and 1180 00:57:30,800 --> 00:57:32,920 Speaker 5: and we had to ask that hard question, which was 1181 00:57:34,000 --> 00:57:38,200 Speaker 5: did it feel like, like was it hard when people 1182 00:57:38,240 --> 00:57:40,840 Speaker 5: would make fun of your music? You know, oh, they 1183 00:57:40,880 --> 00:57:42,880 Speaker 5: were made fun of all. 1184 00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:46,320 Speaker 2: The kind of but you know, just laughing all the 1185 00:57:46,320 --> 00:57:46,880 Speaker 2: way to the bank. 1186 00:57:46,920 --> 00:57:49,160 Speaker 3: They're they're fine, They're like a meme. 1187 00:57:49,520 --> 00:57:54,320 Speaker 5: They are really Yeah, Alie, you asked the last two questions. 1188 00:57:54,440 --> 00:57:55,440 Speaker 2: Okay, it's a two parter. 1189 00:57:55,880 --> 00:57:58,120 Speaker 1: It's look at you over how flexible you are? Dude? 1190 00:57:58,120 --> 00:58:02,200 Speaker 1: That is insanity one more time. So I can't. I can't. 1191 00:58:02,320 --> 00:58:05,720 Speaker 1: You're totally faking it. There's no way. Am I looking 1192 00:58:05,840 --> 00:58:10,320 Speaker 1: for the plastic leg somewhere? Okay, go ahead, all. 1193 00:58:10,280 --> 00:58:14,440 Speaker 2: Right, if there's one thing that you could emulate that 1194 00:58:14,520 --> 00:58:16,360 Speaker 2: your sister has, something that you could take from them 1195 00:58:16,360 --> 00:58:18,400 Speaker 2: that you wish you had, what would that be? And 1196 00:58:18,480 --> 00:58:21,000 Speaker 2: if there was something that you could sort of extract 1197 00:58:21,120 --> 00:58:24,520 Speaker 2: from them, take away something that would make their lives 1198 00:58:24,560 --> 00:58:26,360 Speaker 2: a little bit better for them, what would what would 1199 00:58:26,400 --> 00:58:26,600 Speaker 2: that be? 1200 00:58:26,720 --> 00:58:29,520 Speaker 1: Oh my gosh, Nicole, you do the honors her or 1201 00:58:29,600 --> 00:58:34,280 Speaker 1: her drive just driving the car, no like ruthless. 1202 00:58:33,960 --> 00:58:39,040 Speaker 6: Commission and just ability to like be so wholeheartedly dedicated 1203 00:58:39,080 --> 00:58:46,000 Speaker 6: to something without and take away something. 1204 00:58:45,760 --> 00:58:49,800 Speaker 2: Like like as in like something that like like burns 1205 00:58:49,800 --> 00:58:52,640 Speaker 2: her that if she didn't have alleviate something. 1206 00:58:52,680 --> 00:58:55,000 Speaker 1: You know, there's a lot of choices. 1207 00:58:56,280 --> 00:58:59,680 Speaker 7: Uh like like the chatter in her mind. 1208 00:59:00,680 --> 00:59:05,360 Speaker 1: Amen's sister like you know a loud yeah, like you 1209 00:59:05,400 --> 00:59:06,160 Speaker 1: know that we all have. 1210 00:59:06,800 --> 00:59:11,280 Speaker 7: I mean that I think that's something that can be burdensome. 1211 00:59:10,720 --> 00:59:14,520 Speaker 2: To her at times, such self the negative self talk. 1212 00:59:14,680 --> 00:59:19,480 Speaker 1: That's why I used to drink. Yeah, thanks God. 1213 00:59:19,520 --> 00:59:22,200 Speaker 2: I wonder if i'd an alcoholic? Am I an alcoholic? 1214 00:59:22,400 --> 00:59:30,640 Speaker 1: Well? You know, I mean that's a loodcast that deeper 1215 00:59:30,800 --> 00:59:32,280 Speaker 1: maybe conversation, yeah. 1216 00:59:34,160 --> 00:59:39,120 Speaker 2: Mom maybe no, no, no, no, momm thought I was 1217 00:59:39,160 --> 00:59:42,720 Speaker 2: an alcoholic. I was seventeen. She used to be like, 1218 00:59:42,960 --> 00:59:45,480 Speaker 2: and then I hear you around the house with a 1219 00:59:45,520 --> 00:59:49,040 Speaker 2: little tinkling of the ice going up and down the stairs. 1220 00:59:48,600 --> 00:59:59,200 Speaker 1: And like, okay, maybe okay, Nicola, Okay, so what I 1221 00:59:59,240 --> 01:00:08,040 Speaker 1: would okay, so hmm, her her hope, joy and just 1222 01:00:08,120 --> 01:00:13,400 Speaker 1: like gratitude for like the present in life, and just 1223 01:00:13,560 --> 01:00:18,920 Speaker 1: how grounded and empathetic and compassionate she is, even though 1224 01:00:18,960 --> 01:00:22,720 Speaker 1: that was like twelve things. Okay, no, it's good. And 1225 01:00:22,760 --> 01:00:25,959 Speaker 1: then I think I would take away just like any 1226 01:00:26,080 --> 01:00:30,600 Speaker 1: type of worry of the future whatsoever, because all we 1227 01:00:30,640 --> 01:00:34,600 Speaker 1: can live is now in the present. So they say 1228 01:00:36,640 --> 01:00:39,640 Speaker 1: that is for sure. It's okay, we all are, we 1229 01:00:39,720 --> 01:00:40,000 Speaker 1: all are. 1230 01:00:40,160 --> 01:00:42,520 Speaker 2: It does feel good, though, when you have those moments 1231 01:00:42,960 --> 01:00:46,240 Speaker 2: of just sort of spinning out because of something in 1232 01:00:46,280 --> 01:00:48,720 Speaker 2: the future, something you don't have or something you need, 1233 01:00:49,080 --> 01:00:52,040 Speaker 2: and then being able to really just settle in to 1234 01:00:52,160 --> 01:00:55,320 Speaker 2: the moment of now and understand that you're creating this 1235 01:00:55,440 --> 01:00:57,440 Speaker 2: sort of false narrative because of reality. 1236 01:00:57,560 --> 01:00:58,120 Speaker 1: That's true. 1237 01:00:58,240 --> 01:01:01,760 Speaker 2: You're creating a false reality that is actually causing you pain. 1238 01:01:02,040 --> 01:01:04,360 Speaker 2: And they're like, oh wait, and then you're able to 1239 01:01:04,400 --> 01:01:07,439 Speaker 2: sort of find that place where nothing matters and there's 1240 01:01:07,480 --> 01:01:08,520 Speaker 2: that relief. 1241 01:01:09,000 --> 01:01:13,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, you have to get flexible poses in order for that. 1242 01:01:13,880 --> 01:01:22,040 Speaker 2: Yes, I do like a lever and then I feel better. 1243 01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:27,360 Speaker 1: Yeah, I can't. This is oh my god, I'm very oppressed. 1244 01:01:27,360 --> 01:01:32,640 Speaker 3: Okay, thank you so much, thank you, thank you, thank you. 1245 01:01:33,320 --> 01:01:34,439 Speaker 2: This is really fun. 1246 01:01:36,400 --> 01:01:39,520 Speaker 3: And and Cheryl, you should dance with Oliver. Oliver, you should. 1247 01:01:39,600 --> 01:01:41,680 Speaker 1: Actually, I'll come out of retirement. 1248 01:01:42,200 --> 01:01:43,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll win that ship. 1249 01:01:45,080 --> 01:01:47,240 Speaker 1: Change your attitude. Okay, you got to change that attitude. 1250 01:01:47,440 --> 01:01:50,840 Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll change it once I'm on the show. 1251 01:01:50,920 --> 01:01:53,720 Speaker 1: But for right now, yeah, you know, like that whole 1252 01:01:53,760 --> 01:01:56,360 Speaker 1: present living. You can't worry about that miracle right away. 1253 01:01:56,360 --> 01:01:59,959 Speaker 2: Okay, No, I won't, I won't. I'll step by step. 1254 01:02:00,360 --> 01:02:02,960 Speaker 1: This was so fun. Thank you guys for bretting sas 1255 01:02:03,520 --> 01:02:04,640 Speaker 1: Thank you. 1256 01:02:04,800 --> 01:02:06,560 Speaker 2: Nice to be Nicole, appreciate it, y'all. 1257 01:02:06,760 --> 01:02:11,640 Speaker 1: Bye h