1 00:00:00,120 --> 00:00:01,880 Speaker 1: If you have your own story of being in a 2 00:00:01,960 --> 00:00:03,760 Speaker 1: cult or a high control group. 3 00:00:03,600 --> 00:00:06,720 Speaker 2: Or if you've had experience with manipulation or abusive power 4 00:00:06,760 --> 00:00:07,760 Speaker 2: that you'd like to share. 5 00:00:07,640 --> 00:00:10,040 Speaker 1: Leave us a message on our hotline number at three 6 00:00:10,039 --> 00:00:12,320 Speaker 1: four seven eight six trust. 7 00:00:12,160 --> 00:00:15,840 Speaker 2: That's three four seven eight six eight seven eight seven eight, 8 00:00:16,200 --> 00:00:16,880 Speaker 2: or shoot. 9 00:00:16,680 --> 00:00:19,880 Speaker 1: Us an email at trust Me pod at gmail dot com. 10 00:00:20,280 --> 00:00:24,880 Speaker 3: Trust me, Trust trust Me. I'm like a swat person. 11 00:00:25,320 --> 00:00:26,280 Speaker 3: I've never lived to. 12 00:00:26,280 --> 00:00:28,280 Speaker 4: You and never a live. 13 00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:31,600 Speaker 2: If you think that one person has all the answers, 14 00:00:31,800 --> 00:00:35,800 Speaker 2: don't Welcome to trust Me. The podcast about cult, extreme 15 00:00:35,800 --> 00:00:39,839 Speaker 2: belief and manipulation from two groupies who've actually experienced it. 16 00:00:39,920 --> 00:00:42,800 Speaker 2: I'm low LeBlanc and I'm Megan Elizabeth. And today our 17 00:00:42,840 --> 00:00:46,600 Speaker 2: guest is Jay van Babel. He's Associate Professor of psychology 18 00:00:46,600 --> 00:00:49,600 Speaker 2: and neuroscience at NYU, where he's also the director of 19 00:00:49,600 --> 00:00:52,159 Speaker 2: the Social Identity and Morality Lab, and he's the co 20 00:00:52,240 --> 00:00:54,480 Speaker 2: author of an excellent book called the Power of Us. 21 00:00:54,520 --> 00:00:56,680 Speaker 2: He's going to talk to us about social identity and 22 00:00:56,720 --> 00:00:58,760 Speaker 2: how we have many of them that can morph and 23 00:00:58,840 --> 00:01:01,040 Speaker 2: change depending on our circums stances. How the group we 24 00:01:01,120 --> 00:01:03,680 Speaker 2: identify with can affect not just our decisions, but also 25 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:06,720 Speaker 2: our perception and how groups will inevitably form leaders. So 26 00:01:06,760 --> 00:01:09,440 Speaker 2: it's important to implement hierarchy in a healthy way and 27 00:01:09,480 --> 00:01:11,520 Speaker 2: not just leave it to the charismatic people. 28 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:16,600 Speaker 1: Indeed, we'll also discuss how emotionally charged situations create shared 29 00:01:16,640 --> 00:01:21,120 Speaker 1: identity and how cults systematically replace individual identities with the 30 00:01:21,160 --> 00:01:24,280 Speaker 1: group identity, which then makes it even harder to penetrate 31 00:01:24,319 --> 00:01:27,039 Speaker 1: their belief system. Plus ways to intervene when someone has 32 00:01:27,040 --> 00:01:29,759 Speaker 1: fallen prey to group think, whether groups can be good, 33 00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:31,040 Speaker 1: and lots more. 34 00:01:31,000 --> 00:01:32,840 Speaker 2: Lots more. I love this conversation. 35 00:01:33,080 --> 00:01:33,640 Speaker 1: He's great. 36 00:01:33,760 --> 00:01:37,600 Speaker 2: So yeah, talking for hours before we get in with Jay. 37 00:01:37,800 --> 00:01:40,320 Speaker 2: Tell me, please, what your cultiest thing this week is? 38 00:01:40,480 --> 00:01:45,080 Speaker 1: Minds sad? But I know, I guess this happened in May, 39 00:01:45,200 --> 00:01:48,760 Speaker 1: but I'm just reading about it now. A scientologist, this 40 00:01:48,960 --> 00:01:53,640 Speaker 1: beautiful forty year old woman in Florida recently shot herself 41 00:01:53,680 --> 00:01:57,080 Speaker 1: and then let herself on fire because she wanted to 42 00:01:57,480 --> 00:01:59,880 Speaker 1: drop the body and go to a new one because 43 00:02:00,280 --> 00:02:03,440 Speaker 1: limes disease. So lots of stuff coming out of the 44 00:02:03,520 --> 00:02:07,280 Speaker 1: church saying we never say drop the body or anything 45 00:02:07,320 --> 00:02:09,640 Speaker 1: like that. But then they're showing her text messages with 46 00:02:09,680 --> 00:02:12,560 Speaker 1: somebody talking about how she wants to do the quote 47 00:02:12,600 --> 00:02:15,080 Speaker 1: unquote assist of dropping the body. 48 00:02:14,840 --> 00:02:18,120 Speaker 2: And is the person in those texts like affirming that 49 00:02:18,120 --> 00:02:18,720 Speaker 2: that's thing. 50 00:02:19,560 --> 00:02:22,560 Speaker 1: Yeah, she goes, oops, I made a mistake. I asked 51 00:02:22,560 --> 00:02:26,320 Speaker 1: for the assist and the girl goes oopsy. She didn't say, 52 00:02:26,360 --> 00:02:29,200 Speaker 1: what's those cyst you know, she just said, oh, you 53 00:02:29,240 --> 00:02:30,040 Speaker 1: shouldn't do that. 54 00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:32,160 Speaker 2: I don't know, but they mean. I mean, I guess that. 55 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:33,960 Speaker 1: The girl she was talking to is kind of like 56 00:02:34,040 --> 00:02:37,120 Speaker 1: covering her ass and being like, well, oops, don't don't 57 00:02:37,160 --> 00:02:40,040 Speaker 1: talk about that, like it exists, but we don't do it. 58 00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:43,320 Speaker 1: But the fact that it exists means somebody might do it. 59 00:02:43,400 --> 00:02:45,920 Speaker 2: That is a part of their belief system. Yeah, but 60 00:02:45,960 --> 00:02:47,760 Speaker 2: they just don't like to advertise, you know what. 61 00:02:47,919 --> 00:02:51,160 Speaker 1: It's like Mormonism and polygamy. It's like, we don't do 62 00:02:51,240 --> 00:02:53,000 Speaker 1: that anymore, the mainstreams. 63 00:02:53,040 --> 00:02:55,920 Speaker 2: Well yeah, yeah, well they don't do it anymore, but 64 00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:59,680 Speaker 2: they it is. It is part of the history for sure, right, yeah, exactly, 65 00:03:00,200 --> 00:03:02,240 Speaker 2: or like blood atonement, how blood atonement was a part 66 00:03:02,240 --> 00:03:05,080 Speaker 2: of a Mormon history, but they pretend that it exactly 67 00:03:05,480 --> 00:03:07,040 Speaker 2: or at least the concept of it. 68 00:03:07,639 --> 00:03:12,200 Speaker 1: That's super sad, I know, Sorry, guys, I just I'm 69 00:03:12,240 --> 00:03:15,200 Speaker 1: wondering if this is going to maybe cause a stir 70 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:16,600 Speaker 1: within the community. 71 00:03:16,760 --> 00:03:19,000 Speaker 2: I mean, I didn't hear about that from anyone, but 72 00:03:19,120 --> 00:03:20,680 Speaker 2: you so I wonder so. 73 00:03:20,720 --> 00:03:22,720 Speaker 1: Not causing a stir exactly. 74 00:03:24,320 --> 00:03:27,400 Speaker 2: Also, but I mean I also haven't been looking at 75 00:03:27,400 --> 00:03:29,280 Speaker 2: the news that much, so maybe I just missed it. 76 00:03:29,320 --> 00:03:31,239 Speaker 2: But I mean I would hope that that would bring 77 00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:36,040 Speaker 2: more attention to me too, potentially harmful. Yeah about you, Well, 78 00:03:36,080 --> 00:03:37,720 Speaker 2: you know we got to talk about Andrew Tate. 79 00:03:37,920 --> 00:03:41,880 Speaker 1: Oh God, give it to me, Okay. 80 00:03:41,920 --> 00:03:44,119 Speaker 2: Well, I mean, I'm sure everybody pretty knows pretty much 81 00:03:44,120 --> 00:03:46,280 Speaker 2: knows who this guy is at this point, but the 82 00:03:46,640 --> 00:03:49,560 Speaker 2: if you look up toxic mail and the dictionary, it 83 00:03:49,640 --> 00:03:53,160 Speaker 2: will be him who, for some reason, people love on 84 00:03:53,280 --> 00:03:58,200 Speaker 2: the internet has been arrested at long last on charges 85 00:03:58,240 --> 00:04:01,320 Speaker 2: of human trafficking, rape, and forming an organized crime group. 86 00:04:01,400 --> 00:04:04,280 Speaker 2: It is no secret that this man is into rape. 87 00:04:04,280 --> 00:04:07,320 Speaker 2: He has talked about it in a way that would 88 00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:10,400 Speaker 2: indicate that a number of times. There's been video of 89 00:04:10,520 --> 00:04:13,120 Speaker 2: him beating a woman. He talks about how women belong 90 00:04:13,160 --> 00:04:16,320 Speaker 2: in the home. People have accused him of these things, 91 00:04:16,760 --> 00:04:22,000 Speaker 2: but it's just so crazy because he's been running Hustler University, 92 00:04:22,040 --> 00:04:27,400 Speaker 2: Which are you a cartoon university? A cartoon villain? This 93 00:04:27,520 --> 00:04:32,080 Speaker 2: man is where busloads of American men and British men 94 00:04:32,120 --> 00:04:35,920 Speaker 2: have just been trucking in to go to Hustler's University, 95 00:04:36,000 --> 00:04:39,279 Speaker 2: where they've literally just been like forcing women to do 96 00:04:39,520 --> 00:04:41,520 Speaker 2: porn and or sex x that they didn't want to do. 97 00:04:42,160 --> 00:04:45,920 Speaker 2: Like I, how is it real? How is it real? 98 00:04:45,920 --> 00:04:48,039 Speaker 2: I'm so glad he's arrested, and the way he's arrested 99 00:04:48,120 --> 00:04:51,640 Speaker 2: is the funniest thing ever, because for anyone who doesn't 100 00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:54,520 Speaker 2: know you saw his tweet to Greta Thunberg. Of course, 101 00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:58,680 Speaker 2: Hello Greta Thunberg on Twitter, I have thirty three cars. 102 00:04:58,920 --> 00:05:01,200 Speaker 2: Please provide your email address so I can send a 103 00:05:01,200 --> 00:05:03,359 Speaker 2: complete list of my car collection and the respect of 104 00:05:03,520 --> 00:05:06,960 Speaker 2: enormous emissions, she says back, Yes, please do enlighten me. 105 00:05:07,040 --> 00:05:10,440 Speaker 2: Email me at small Dick Energy at gett alife dot com. 106 00:05:10,920 --> 00:05:14,360 Speaker 2: He then posts a video of himself wearing a Versace robe, 107 00:05:14,400 --> 00:05:17,039 Speaker 2: smoking his cigar, and describing her as a bitter slave 108 00:05:17,080 --> 00:05:19,000 Speaker 2: of the matrix who's trying to convince you to beg 109 00:05:19,040 --> 00:05:21,039 Speaker 2: your government to tax you into poverty to stop the 110 00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:24,200 Speaker 2: sun from being hot. He then gestures off camera asks 111 00:05:24,200 --> 00:05:27,320 Speaker 2: someone to bring him pizza and the pizza place. The 112 00:05:28,040 --> 00:05:30,480 Speaker 2: location of the pizza place is the thing that gets 113 00:05:30,560 --> 00:05:32,800 Speaker 2: him arrested because he's been. 114 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:35,159 Speaker 1: On cartoon so long, literal cartoon. 115 00:05:35,360 --> 00:05:38,919 Speaker 2: It's so funny, it's so funny. What he's done is 116 00:05:38,960 --> 00:05:41,320 Speaker 2: not fucking funny, but the fact that that is how 117 00:05:41,320 --> 00:05:44,359 Speaker 2: he went down is so funny. Like there's just you 118 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:48,080 Speaker 2: can't eat the small dick energy is so strong. The 119 00:05:48,200 --> 00:05:50,279 Speaker 2: need to look like a big man is so big 120 00:05:50,360 --> 00:05:54,240 Speaker 2: that he can't even stop himself from releasing a video 121 00:05:54,480 --> 00:05:56,960 Speaker 2: talking about how great and manly he is that gets 122 00:05:57,040 --> 00:05:57,960 Speaker 2: him fucking arrested. 123 00:05:58,320 --> 00:06:00,839 Speaker 1: Well, something else you were saying earlier that is very 124 00:06:00,839 --> 00:06:04,000 Speaker 1: interesting is that the Taliban is angry that he's arrested. 125 00:06:04,200 --> 00:06:05,799 Speaker 2: Taliban wants him to be free. 126 00:06:05,920 --> 00:06:07,920 Speaker 1: They're like, I mean, and I was just saying, I 127 00:06:08,279 --> 00:06:10,279 Speaker 1: think that's how you know you're on the wrong track 128 00:06:10,440 --> 00:06:14,760 Speaker 1: is if the Taliban is like, you're cool, this is good? 129 00:06:15,200 --> 00:06:17,880 Speaker 2: So yeah, yeah, yeah, no, it's not great. 130 00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:21,200 Speaker 1: In this episode, I call myself cool. I'd like to 131 00:06:21,320 --> 00:06:22,680 Speaker 1: just say I don't think that I am. 132 00:06:22,760 --> 00:06:25,480 Speaker 2: So thank you for that clarification when you say it, 133 00:06:25,520 --> 00:06:29,840 Speaker 2: When you said Wow, she's just gonna commit. 134 00:06:30,080 --> 00:06:35,839 Speaker 1: She's I was going to say cold, and I said cool, 135 00:06:38,040 --> 00:06:38,600 Speaker 1: and I did. 136 00:06:41,279 --> 00:06:43,200 Speaker 2: You guys will know what we're talking about in a 137 00:06:43,240 --> 00:06:48,960 Speaker 2: few minutes. That is amazing. Yeah, okay, like damn the 138 00:06:49,040 --> 00:06:50,159 Speaker 2: confidence on megget. 139 00:06:50,720 --> 00:06:53,200 Speaker 1: I'm cool. You'll see. 140 00:06:55,080 --> 00:06:57,600 Speaker 2: All right, let's talk to Jay and you can all 141 00:06:57,640 --> 00:06:59,080 Speaker 2: hear exactly what we're talking about. 142 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:02,839 Speaker 1: Trust Me is brought to you by Progressive Insurance. 143 00:07:03,080 --> 00:07:06,040 Speaker 2: Most of you listening right now are probably multitasking. 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Okay, So you're the Associate Professor of Psychology 171 00:08:21,120 --> 00:08:23,960 Speaker 2: and Neural Science at NYU, the director of the Social 172 00:08:23,960 --> 00:08:27,600 Speaker 2: Identity and Morality Lab, which is where also any that 173 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:30,280 Speaker 2: makes sense, and co author of the Power of Us, 174 00:08:30,840 --> 00:08:33,080 Speaker 2: which I started reading and it is very very good. 175 00:08:33,360 --> 00:08:35,600 Speaker 2: Can you tell us, first of all, what led you 176 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:38,080 Speaker 2: to this field and what made you interested in these topics? 177 00:08:38,240 --> 00:08:42,640 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean I got fascinated with group psychology ever 178 00:08:42,679 --> 00:08:44,640 Speaker 4: since I've been young. I cite a lot of sports 179 00:08:44,640 --> 00:08:47,000 Speaker 4: and So I love the dynamics of sports teams and 180 00:08:47,040 --> 00:08:49,200 Speaker 4: when people get really identified and they can work together 181 00:08:49,320 --> 00:08:52,240 Speaker 4: and they can either be like curly cohesive or fall apart. 182 00:08:53,240 --> 00:08:56,240 Speaker 4: And then I started also getting interested in things like discrimination. 183 00:08:56,360 --> 00:08:58,640 Speaker 4: Why do some groups discriminate against others? And what is 184 00:08:58,679 --> 00:09:01,640 Speaker 4: the psychology of that? And then more recently I've been 185 00:09:01,679 --> 00:09:05,800 Speaker 4: interested in, you know, those factors of identity and groupishness 186 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:08,240 Speaker 4: in all kinds of other spaces. So how that plays 187 00:09:08,280 --> 00:09:10,920 Speaker 4: out on social media, how that plays out in politics, 188 00:09:11,000 --> 00:09:13,520 Speaker 4: how that plays out in cults. And so I'm really 189 00:09:13,559 --> 00:09:15,440 Speaker 4: interested in kind of these group dynamics and all these 190 00:09:15,480 --> 00:09:16,560 Speaker 4: different parts of our lives. 191 00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:20,840 Speaker 1: Me too, groups are so stressful, just the word group. 192 00:09:21,960 --> 00:09:24,240 Speaker 2: Okay, So first of all, what is social identity? 193 00:09:24,480 --> 00:09:27,600 Speaker 4: Yeah, so identity. Most people understand what identity is, right, 194 00:09:27,640 --> 00:09:30,360 Speaker 4: It's who I am, it's her sense of self. Social 195 00:09:30,360 --> 00:09:32,360 Speaker 4: identity means part of our sense of self comes from 196 00:09:32,360 --> 00:09:34,240 Speaker 4: the groups that we belong to. And so here's a 197 00:09:34,280 --> 00:09:36,199 Speaker 4: little exercise you can put yourself. So I'll put you 198 00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:39,040 Speaker 4: both through it. Right now, answer the question I am 199 00:09:39,240 --> 00:09:42,440 Speaker 4: blank five times? So each shake, turn and say, what 200 00:09:42,480 --> 00:09:44,480 Speaker 4: are the first kind of five parts of our identity? 201 00:09:44,480 --> 00:09:45,080 Speaker 3: That come to mind. 202 00:09:45,240 --> 00:09:47,479 Speaker 2: Oh god, I am creative. 203 00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:51,679 Speaker 1: Oh my god, it is so early for me to 204 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,040 Speaker 1: say good things about myself. Okay. 205 00:09:54,679 --> 00:10:01,200 Speaker 2: I am funny, I am anxious, I am cool. I 206 00:10:01,240 --> 00:10:07,559 Speaker 2: am a filmmaker, I am an artist, I am curious. 207 00:10:08,600 --> 00:10:10,880 Speaker 1: I am not a morning person. 208 00:10:11,320 --> 00:10:13,880 Speaker 2: I am a writer. 209 00:10:14,840 --> 00:10:17,079 Speaker 1: I am hungry. 210 00:10:19,280 --> 00:10:20,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, okay. 211 00:10:19,840 --> 00:10:23,160 Speaker 4: So some of those things that you mentioned are like 212 00:10:23,360 --> 00:10:26,679 Speaker 4: states like I'm hungry right now. Some of them are 213 00:10:26,760 --> 00:10:31,200 Speaker 4: traits like I'm curious, and those are often stable traits. 214 00:10:31,640 --> 00:10:34,319 Speaker 4: But a couple of things you mentioned are actually social identities. 215 00:10:34,440 --> 00:10:36,800 Speaker 4: So when you mentioned I'm a filmmaker, it means that 216 00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 4: you identify with other people who are making films. 217 00:10:39,240 --> 00:10:39,959 Speaker 3: You might talk to. 218 00:10:39,920 --> 00:10:41,760 Speaker 4: Them, you might go to their websites, you might be 219 00:10:41,800 --> 00:10:44,240 Speaker 4: inspired by what they've done. You might do like group 220 00:10:44,280 --> 00:10:48,640 Speaker 4: meetups or drinks or conferences or writer. So I became 221 00:10:48,679 --> 00:10:50,679 Speaker 4: an author once I published my book, which I was 222 00:10:50,720 --> 00:10:52,040 Speaker 4: a new identity, and then all of a sudden you 223 00:10:52,160 --> 00:10:54,160 Speaker 4: kind of get into this whole new world of other 224 00:10:54,240 --> 00:10:57,520 Speaker 4: people who written books, other authors, and they treat you different. 225 00:10:57,800 --> 00:11:01,400 Speaker 4: And so that's what social identities are. It's some part 226 00:11:01,440 --> 00:11:04,120 Speaker 4: of ourself that is defined in part by the groups 227 00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:06,439 Speaker 4: we belong to, and when you identify with a group, 228 00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:08,680 Speaker 4: it comes with this certain set of norms. So for me, 229 00:11:08,760 --> 00:11:10,920 Speaker 4: let's say one of my identities is I'm a scientist. 230 00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:13,120 Speaker 4: It means that, like I have to care a lot 231 00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:15,480 Speaker 4: about the truth. I have to like go through care 232 00:11:15,480 --> 00:11:18,920 Speaker 4: about things like peer review, I have to do like experiments, 233 00:11:19,280 --> 00:11:21,560 Speaker 4: and I have to have other scientists who judge and 234 00:11:21,559 --> 00:11:22,560 Speaker 4: criticize me all the time. 235 00:11:22,559 --> 00:11:23,120 Speaker 3: That's part of it. 236 00:11:23,440 --> 00:11:26,480 Speaker 4: When I go home, I'm a dad, I have young kids, 237 00:11:26,559 --> 00:11:28,760 Speaker 4: and like I completely forget about my job, and they 238 00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:30,920 Speaker 4: like want me to help them with their homework or 239 00:11:30,960 --> 00:11:34,360 Speaker 4: make dinner or play board game with them, and so 240 00:11:34,640 --> 00:11:36,160 Speaker 4: all of a sudden, I have a different set of 241 00:11:36,200 --> 00:11:38,120 Speaker 4: norms and expectations of what it is to. 242 00:11:38,080 --> 00:11:39,280 Speaker 3: Be a dad that come to mind. 243 00:11:39,679 --> 00:11:41,960 Speaker 4: And so in a given day, you have all these 244 00:11:42,000 --> 00:11:44,000 Speaker 4: different identities inside you, and you kind of move from 245 00:11:44,000 --> 00:11:47,600 Speaker 4: one situation to the other and different identities spring to mind. 246 00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:49,959 Speaker 4: So if you're like a filmmaker, it's maybe when you're 247 00:11:50,000 --> 00:11:52,080 Speaker 4: like thinking and working on your film that you're thinking 248 00:11:52,120 --> 00:11:54,640 Speaker 4: through that lens. What will other filmmakers think? What would 249 00:11:54,679 --> 00:11:55,960 Speaker 4: great filmmaker do here? 250 00:11:56,120 --> 00:11:57,360 Speaker 3: What was I trained? You know? 251 00:11:57,480 --> 00:12:01,400 Speaker 4: In filmmaking school to do whereas like you know, you 252 00:12:01,440 --> 00:12:02,559 Speaker 4: go to another part of your life. I was the 253 00:12:02,559 --> 00:12:04,839 Speaker 4: see you're wearing like a Calve's sweatshirt. I don't know 254 00:12:04,880 --> 00:12:05,840 Speaker 4: if you're like an alumni. 255 00:12:06,280 --> 00:12:07,680 Speaker 3: No, I actually thought. 256 00:12:07,440 --> 00:12:08,880 Speaker 1: That when I wore this today, I was like, what 257 00:12:08,920 --> 00:12:10,920 Speaker 1: am I doing? This is such a weird day to 258 00:12:10,960 --> 00:12:12,560 Speaker 1: do this. But is it just a shirt? 259 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:16,839 Speaker 4: So if I saw like a sweatshirt like that on campus, 260 00:12:16,960 --> 00:12:18,840 Speaker 4: I would think, oh, that's a student who's visiting from 261 00:12:18,880 --> 00:12:21,800 Speaker 4: calum maybe did their degree at Callen's now a professor 262 00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,040 Speaker 4: or a graduate student at n YU. 263 00:12:24,200 --> 00:12:25,880 Speaker 3: Because that's another way we signal. 264 00:12:25,600 --> 00:12:28,280 Speaker 4: Our identities, what university when we went to or college, 265 00:12:29,040 --> 00:12:30,640 Speaker 4: or what sports team we cheer for. A lot of 266 00:12:30,679 --> 00:12:33,960 Speaker 4: people like are identified with sports teams at colleges, and 267 00:12:34,000 --> 00:12:36,840 Speaker 4: so once you kind of put on once you identified 268 00:12:36,920 --> 00:12:39,200 Speaker 4: the group, and that that identity is triggered. It's like 269 00:12:39,240 --> 00:12:42,000 Speaker 4: putting on a pair of sunglasses where everything looks a 270 00:12:42,000 --> 00:12:43,960 Speaker 4: little different and you're kind of seeing the world through 271 00:12:43,960 --> 00:12:44,800 Speaker 4: a different lens. 272 00:12:45,360 --> 00:12:47,960 Speaker 2: So we can have multiple identities and it just really 273 00:12:47,960 --> 00:12:51,200 Speaker 2: depends on where we are and who we're with. And yeah, and. 274 00:12:51,400 --> 00:12:52,800 Speaker 4: That's one of the things like when you when you 275 00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:54,959 Speaker 4: if you ever go to a date. Part of that's 276 00:12:55,000 --> 00:12:57,160 Speaker 4: what you're doing when you're like asking these questions and 277 00:12:57,160 --> 00:12:59,480 Speaker 4: trying to get to know the person is trying to 278 00:12:59,520 --> 00:13:01,600 Speaker 4: figure out like do we share identities, do we share 279 00:13:01,640 --> 00:13:04,560 Speaker 4: groups that we care about? Or obviously you just can 280 00:13:04,679 --> 00:13:07,240 Speaker 4: now online do it on like your dating profile, and 281 00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,200 Speaker 4: people put the strangest identities on there. 282 00:13:09,240 --> 00:13:12,200 Speaker 3: They might put like filmmaker or like horror film. 283 00:13:12,080 --> 00:13:15,560 Speaker 4: Enthusiast, but they also put things like like their their 284 00:13:15,600 --> 00:13:19,720 Speaker 4: personality profile and the Meyers Briggs test, yeah, or what 285 00:13:19,720 --> 00:13:20,160 Speaker 4: what you know. 286 00:13:20,320 --> 00:13:22,360 Speaker 3: They did that? Yeah? 287 00:13:22,400 --> 00:13:26,079 Speaker 1: What is your eniogram? The like one, three or twelve? 288 00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:26,480 Speaker 2: Yeah? 289 00:13:26,559 --> 00:13:29,000 Speaker 5: Yeah yeah, so so THO turns out those are pretty 290 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:32,480 Speaker 5: much just pseudoscience. Yeah a psychologists, and I would like 291 00:13:32,559 --> 00:13:35,760 Speaker 5: I I company spend billions of dollars giving these people, 292 00:13:35,760 --> 00:13:37,800 Speaker 5: but they're basically basically junk junk science. 293 00:13:37,840 --> 00:13:39,720 Speaker 3: But the reason people love them is because. 294 00:13:39,559 --> 00:13:41,400 Speaker 4: It puts you in a box and it gives you 295 00:13:41,440 --> 00:13:44,640 Speaker 4: an identity and then it's like, oh, you know, you know, 296 00:13:44,720 --> 00:13:49,560 Speaker 4: Amelia Earhart and Einstein were also whatever you know, and 297 00:13:49,679 --> 00:13:52,920 Speaker 4: enter whatever that I am. And so that's the type 298 00:13:52,920 --> 00:13:54,680 Speaker 4: of thing people actually want to be put in a box. 299 00:13:54,679 --> 00:13:57,440 Speaker 4: They'll say they want to be individuals, but they also 300 00:13:57,440 --> 00:13:58,800 Speaker 4: want to have these group identities. 301 00:13:59,600 --> 00:14:05,200 Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I mean random example. But like I said, 302 00:14:05,240 --> 00:14:08,120 Speaker 2: I'm anxious to me, that actually like sort of because 303 00:14:08,160 --> 00:14:11,880 Speaker 2: I have, well, I have been diagnosed with OCD and 304 00:14:12,480 --> 00:14:15,440 Speaker 2: struggle with anxiety. But I actually don't think it's it's 305 00:14:15,520 --> 00:14:17,640 Speaker 2: like not that useful as a label other than it 306 00:14:17,720 --> 00:14:20,400 Speaker 2: helps me go online and find other people who have 307 00:14:20,440 --> 00:14:22,480 Speaker 2: OCD and get to talk about this thing that I 308 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,760 Speaker 2: have and now I have like a framework for it 309 00:14:24,800 --> 00:14:27,560 Speaker 2: to understand what I'm experiencing as opposed to just like 310 00:14:27,800 --> 00:14:29,920 Speaker 2: I'm someone who who gets anxious a lot. 311 00:14:30,720 --> 00:14:32,640 Speaker 4: Is that yeah, I would say that's like one of 312 00:14:32,680 --> 00:14:34,560 Speaker 4: the cool things that the internet gave us, right, is 313 00:14:34,560 --> 00:14:36,840 Speaker 4: that you can kind of find your tribe no matter 314 00:14:36,880 --> 00:14:39,520 Speaker 4: where you are, what you're into, you can find people 315 00:14:39,560 --> 00:14:41,400 Speaker 4: like you, and you can share tips, you can provide 316 00:14:41,480 --> 00:14:44,600 Speaker 4: social support, you can get together. So this is like 317 00:14:44,600 --> 00:14:49,680 Speaker 4: triggers like gatherings and social events and so this is 318 00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:52,240 Speaker 4: like the cool thing is that. And people now on 319 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:54,760 Speaker 4: their social media often will send out a little bat signals. 320 00:14:55,040 --> 00:14:57,080 Speaker 4: So if you look at like their profile, they'll have 321 00:14:57,160 --> 00:15:00,320 Speaker 4: a bunch of their social identities, like in their profile. 322 00:14:59,840 --> 00:15:01,800 Speaker 3: On Twitter or Facebook or. 323 00:15:01,680 --> 00:15:04,000 Speaker 4: Instagram, of course, And what they're doing is signaling to 324 00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:06,480 Speaker 4: look at me. If you check my profilef here, like me, 325 00:15:06,600 --> 00:15:07,120 Speaker 4: follow me. 326 00:15:07,360 --> 00:15:08,680 Speaker 3: And we're a part of the drive. 327 00:15:08,880 --> 00:15:12,680 Speaker 1: Right what's happening and groups becoming more small and more 328 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:16,480 Speaker 1: specific and us finding people who like exactly the same 329 00:15:16,600 --> 00:15:19,080 Speaker 1: niche thing as us. Is that a good thing? 330 00:15:20,120 --> 00:15:20,920 Speaker 3: I don't know if it's good. 331 00:15:20,920 --> 00:15:23,320 Speaker 4: But here's a two big things that groups do for us, 332 00:15:23,640 --> 00:15:26,040 Speaker 4: and the groups that fulfill both of these little needs 333 00:15:26,320 --> 00:15:29,000 Speaker 4: are super attractive to people, super sticky. So one is 334 00:15:29,040 --> 00:15:31,320 Speaker 4: it gives us a sense of belonging. So humans have 335 00:15:31,400 --> 00:15:34,120 Speaker 4: this deep rooted sense of belonging, you know. And I'll 336 00:15:34,160 --> 00:15:36,920 Speaker 4: just put it in evolutionary sense. We evolved in small 337 00:15:36,920 --> 00:15:40,800 Speaker 4: groups in the savannah, and humans aren't fast or strong 338 00:15:40,920 --> 00:15:43,560 Speaker 4: or poisonous. We can't fly away, and so we would 339 00:15:43,560 --> 00:15:45,760 Speaker 4: have got picked off pretty quickly if we were kicked 340 00:15:45,800 --> 00:15:48,160 Speaker 4: out of our group. That's why people are terrified of 341 00:15:48,160 --> 00:15:51,640 Speaker 4: getting like socially shamed or ostracized. Because our ancestors who 342 00:15:51,680 --> 00:15:54,520 Speaker 4: got shamed died and they didn't pass on their genes. 343 00:15:54,560 --> 00:15:56,800 Speaker 4: So we're the we're the ancestors of like one hundred 344 00:15:56,880 --> 00:15:59,200 Speaker 4: generations of humans who fit in and found a sense 345 00:15:59,200 --> 00:16:02,360 Speaker 4: of belonging. But we don't want to fit in too much. 346 00:16:02,400 --> 00:16:04,360 Speaker 4: We want to fit into groups that make us feel 347 00:16:04,360 --> 00:16:05,560 Speaker 4: distinct and special. 348 00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:06,920 Speaker 3: And so this is one of. 349 00:16:06,920 --> 00:16:10,200 Speaker 4: The reasons why like people love like little specialty groups, 350 00:16:10,440 --> 00:16:12,960 Speaker 4: because you get to feel like you're distinct from society 351 00:16:13,520 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 4: and yet a sense of belonging. And this is like 352 00:16:16,520 --> 00:16:18,120 Speaker 4: I would say, this is like the ethos of like 353 00:16:18,200 --> 00:16:21,520 Speaker 4: punks or goths, and I'll see them like on the subway, 354 00:16:21,880 --> 00:16:23,800 Speaker 4: and you can ask them, like, why do you all 355 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:24,400 Speaker 4: dress alike? 356 00:16:24,600 --> 00:16:26,880 Speaker 3: And they'll say, what are you talking about. We're non conformists. 357 00:16:27,280 --> 00:16:29,680 Speaker 4: But from the outside they all look like they hit 358 00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:33,120 Speaker 4: they're conformists, right, But them they're conforming to an. 359 00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:36,040 Speaker 3: An anti kind of counterculture, right. 360 00:16:36,160 --> 00:16:39,440 Speaker 4: So they see themselves as actually super distinctive from society 361 00:16:39,800 --> 00:16:42,080 Speaker 4: and they have this tight sense of belonging and cohesion, 362 00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:45,840 Speaker 4: and so those are really powerful identities for people. It's 363 00:16:45,880 --> 00:16:48,520 Speaker 4: why clubs like dance clubs and nightclubs have like a 364 00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:49,960 Speaker 4: big velvet rope and you have to wait a long 365 00:16:50,000 --> 00:16:52,480 Speaker 4: line to get in. There's a bouncer and they're like 366 00:16:52,560 --> 00:16:54,920 Speaker 4: picking the people who are like good good to have 367 00:16:55,040 --> 00:16:56,920 Speaker 4: in the club. And I've been to clubs where like 368 00:16:56,920 --> 00:16:58,880 Speaker 4: you wait in nine half an hour, you get in, 369 00:16:58,920 --> 00:17:00,000 Speaker 4: there's like twelve people inside. 370 00:17:00,520 --> 00:17:02,480 Speaker 3: But it's all to create this illusion that it's like 371 00:17:02,560 --> 00:17:04,280 Speaker 3: this exclusive, distinctive club. 372 00:17:04,720 --> 00:17:08,160 Speaker 2: Right, So can you guy us some examples of how 373 00:17:08,200 --> 00:17:11,399 Speaker 2: we've seen it play out in studies that we prefer 374 00:17:11,520 --> 00:17:13,000 Speaker 2: our group to other groups? 375 00:17:13,359 --> 00:17:15,639 Speaker 4: Yeah, so the most I think this is one of 376 00:17:15,680 --> 00:17:19,120 Speaker 4: the most important studies in fifty years in social psychology. 377 00:17:19,600 --> 00:17:22,600 Speaker 4: They basically flipped a coin and put a bunch of 378 00:17:22,600 --> 00:17:25,480 Speaker 4: teenagers in two groups. And you didn't even get to 379 00:17:25,480 --> 00:17:27,360 Speaker 4: meet anybody in your group. You didn't get to meet 380 00:17:27,400 --> 00:17:29,600 Speaker 4: anybody in the other group, but you just simply knew 381 00:17:29,600 --> 00:17:31,000 Speaker 4: that you shared an identity with them. 382 00:17:31,200 --> 00:17:32,240 Speaker 3: And then you gave. 383 00:17:32,200 --> 00:17:34,080 Speaker 4: People some money, and they got to figure out how 384 00:17:34,119 --> 00:17:35,560 Speaker 4: much money they wanted to give to an in group 385 00:17:35,600 --> 00:17:37,920 Speaker 4: member and an outgroup member. And even though they didn't 386 00:17:38,000 --> 00:17:40,960 Speaker 4: know people in other group, there was no stereotypes about 387 00:17:40,960 --> 00:17:43,200 Speaker 4: the group, there was no history of conflict. People started 388 00:17:43,200 --> 00:17:45,440 Speaker 4: giving more money to their in group than the outgroup 389 00:17:45,640 --> 00:17:48,439 Speaker 4: like instantly. And I've run this variant of this study 390 00:17:48,440 --> 00:17:51,000 Speaker 4: in multiple countries. I run this in my classroom. I'll 391 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:53,840 Speaker 4: just the split the class into two sides, and by 392 00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:56,280 Speaker 4: the end of the class, they say they identify more 393 00:17:56,280 --> 00:17:58,560 Speaker 4: with their group, and they like their group more, even 394 00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:00,600 Speaker 4: if they've never even really interacted them, even if they're 395 00:18:00,640 --> 00:18:01,400 Speaker 4: total strangers. 396 00:18:01,800 --> 00:18:04,000 Speaker 3: And so that's the power of groups. It's just simply 397 00:18:04,000 --> 00:18:04,960 Speaker 3: flip a coin. 398 00:18:05,240 --> 00:18:07,120 Speaker 4: Putting us on a group is like a switch going 399 00:18:07,160 --> 00:18:10,560 Speaker 4: off in our brain that signals that's my team, that's 400 00:18:10,600 --> 00:18:11,639 Speaker 4: my tribe. 401 00:18:11,880 --> 00:18:15,600 Speaker 1: It's interesting. I went to a escape room on weekend 402 00:18:15,960 --> 00:18:20,160 Speaker 1: and one of my friends and it did like didn't care, 403 00:18:20,600 --> 00:18:22,879 Speaker 1: just didn't care. There was two different teams. They split 404 00:18:22,960 --> 00:18:25,399 Speaker 1: us in two, and so I'd be like unlocking the 405 00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:27,000 Speaker 1: safe and I'd have the numbers of my head and 406 00:18:27,119 --> 00:18:31,000 Speaker 1: be like seventy two man forty, like just saying other numbers, 407 00:18:31,040 --> 00:18:35,080 Speaker 1: and I was like, I hate. I got so angry. 408 00:18:34,840 --> 00:18:37,080 Speaker 3: And I was like the other group is beating us. 409 00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:39,760 Speaker 1: And like screaming mad, you know, and I was just like, 410 00:18:40,160 --> 00:18:43,720 Speaker 1: how is he He's like enlightened, he turned off the 411 00:18:43,760 --> 00:18:46,040 Speaker 1: switch in his brain that gives a shit about winning, 412 00:18:46,119 --> 00:18:48,800 Speaker 1: and like getting this group to win. It was so weird. 413 00:18:48,840 --> 00:18:51,280 Speaker 1: I mean he was also probably on mushrooms. But you know, 414 00:18:51,560 --> 00:18:57,080 Speaker 1: it was strange. It happened so quickly. They just divided us. 415 00:18:57,080 --> 00:19:00,840 Speaker 1: And now I'm like, my whole, my whole sense of 416 00:19:00,880 --> 00:19:02,240 Speaker 1: self depends on how we do. 417 00:19:02,359 --> 00:19:06,000 Speaker 2: We did horribly, but yeah, the thing that I find 418 00:19:06,040 --> 00:19:08,320 Speaker 2: scary is not that we prefer our group, but that 419 00:19:08,359 --> 00:19:12,560 Speaker 2: we will try to disadvantage the other group in favor of. 420 00:19:12,480 --> 00:19:15,400 Speaker 1: Our Well, I would have sabotaged the other group hard. 421 00:19:16,800 --> 00:19:18,919 Speaker 2: And it's based on nothing, as you're saying, like, it 422 00:19:18,920 --> 00:19:22,040 Speaker 2: could be totally arbitrary if it's we just happen to 423 00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:25,520 Speaker 2: both like that sign over there, Like suddenly we're gonna 424 00:19:26,720 --> 00:19:28,960 Speaker 2: make sure that the group who likes the other sign 425 00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:33,640 Speaker 2: over there is getting less money than us. Like why, Yeah, 426 00:19:33,960 --> 00:19:34,560 Speaker 2: here's the thing. 427 00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:38,000 Speaker 4: It makes us feel a sense of status and distinctiveness. Right, 428 00:19:38,040 --> 00:19:40,360 Speaker 4: if we're better than the other group, that's what makes 429 00:19:40,440 --> 00:19:43,160 Speaker 4: us special. And so this is why people are obsessed 430 00:19:43,200 --> 00:19:46,320 Speaker 4: with being part of like successful groups or high status groups. 431 00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:49,280 Speaker 4: Is it makes us feel good. This is why. 432 00:19:49,320 --> 00:19:51,080 Speaker 3: So I think of it. In sports, you. 433 00:19:51,040 --> 00:19:53,320 Speaker 4: Have all these people who are like watching at home 434 00:19:53,359 --> 00:19:56,520 Speaker 4: in their living room by themselves, and they're cheering or 435 00:19:56,640 --> 00:19:58,880 Speaker 4: you can see grown men crying in their living room 436 00:19:58,920 --> 00:19:59,800 Speaker 4: because their team lost. 437 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:02,119 Speaker 3: They had nothing to do with it. They weren't on 438 00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:04,080 Speaker 3: the field, they didn't they didn't go to. 439 00:20:04,040 --> 00:20:07,600 Speaker 4: Practices, They've done nothing to contribute to the team's success 440 00:20:07,680 --> 00:20:10,000 Speaker 4: or failure, and yet they feel it as if it's 441 00:20:10,080 --> 00:20:12,000 Speaker 4: like as something deeply personal and. 442 00:20:11,920 --> 00:20:12,560 Speaker 3: Important to them. 443 00:20:12,720 --> 00:20:19,720 Speaker 2: Yeah, Cana test, sports fan boyfriend, Cana Test. Yeah. Something 444 00:20:19,760 --> 00:20:21,640 Speaker 2: else that you've talked about that I think is really 445 00:20:21,640 --> 00:20:25,600 Speaker 2: really interesting is this idea that we don't just like 446 00:20:25,680 --> 00:20:28,480 Speaker 2: make different decisions based on our group, we also perceive 447 00:20:28,600 --> 00:20:31,480 Speaker 2: things differently based on our group. We literally taken the 448 00:20:31,680 --> 00:20:35,520 Speaker 2: same exact information completely differently depending on what grouper And 449 00:20:35,560 --> 00:20:37,439 Speaker 2: can you just give us an example of that? 450 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:39,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean there's lots of great examples of this. 451 00:20:40,480 --> 00:20:42,520 Speaker 4: One of the famous ones that we talk about. I'll 452 00:20:42,600 --> 00:20:45,440 Speaker 4: use example of sports again is if you have sports fans. 453 00:20:45,440 --> 00:20:48,600 Speaker 4: There's a famous college football game, and the sports the 454 00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:51,800 Speaker 4: fans from the two different teams saw the game completely differently, 455 00:20:51,840 --> 00:20:55,159 Speaker 4: had different memories of which teams committed more fouls, And 456 00:20:55,200 --> 00:20:57,199 Speaker 4: then they ran a study where they showed, you know, 457 00:20:57,240 --> 00:20:59,560 Speaker 4: students from each university that these teams were from It 458 00:20:59,600 --> 00:21:02,320 Speaker 4: was actually from Dartmouth and Princeton, and the professors just 459 00:21:02,359 --> 00:21:05,160 Speaker 4: showed them, you know, a video reel of the game, 460 00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:08,359 Speaker 4: and they still had different perceptions of what happened. And 461 00:21:08,440 --> 00:21:11,359 Speaker 4: so it's it's something that it's very hard to hear. 462 00:21:11,600 --> 00:21:14,880 Speaker 4: And this is why everybody hates refs and umps. It's why, 463 00:21:15,000 --> 00:21:18,600 Speaker 4: like on social media platforms, people hate the moderators. The 464 00:21:18,600 --> 00:21:21,080 Speaker 4: always think that their group is being unfairly moderated. And 465 00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:26,080 Speaker 4: it's because it's the big reason, in the big explanations, 466 00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:29,280 Speaker 4: because they're biased. It's also why people think the media 467 00:21:29,359 --> 00:21:32,840 Speaker 4: is biased. I was I was scrolling that someone posted this. 468 00:21:32,880 --> 00:21:35,200 Speaker 4: I started scrolling through it. It's like the New York Times, 469 00:21:35,200 --> 00:21:37,760 Speaker 4: which I read. You know, you can go online on 470 00:21:37,800 --> 00:21:39,440 Speaker 4: Twitter and there will be a ton of people calling 471 00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:41,919 Speaker 4: the New York Times fascist and a bunch of now 472 00:21:41,960 --> 00:21:45,640 Speaker 4: the whole others that calling them like communist. And so 473 00:21:46,600 --> 00:21:48,640 Speaker 4: is it is it far right or is it far 474 00:21:48,720 --> 00:21:50,639 Speaker 4: left or is it really more kind of like center 475 00:21:50,800 --> 00:21:54,479 Speaker 4: center left? And people from extreme beliefs really see it 476 00:21:54,520 --> 00:21:58,000 Speaker 4: through the lens as an enemy because it's not producing 477 00:21:58,040 --> 00:22:00,760 Speaker 4: exactly what they want or occasionally produced to something that 478 00:22:00,760 --> 00:22:02,840 Speaker 4: they don't like, And so that's kind of like our 479 00:22:02,880 --> 00:22:05,600 Speaker 4: identities and how it affects how we interpret kind of 480 00:22:05,760 --> 00:22:07,480 Speaker 4: all kinds of things relationships. 481 00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:09,040 Speaker 3: By the way, one of the biggest. 482 00:22:08,720 --> 00:22:10,800 Speaker 4: Predictors of who you like in a relationship is do 483 00:22:10,840 --> 00:22:14,320 Speaker 4: they share your politics? And so even things like attractiveness 484 00:22:15,240 --> 00:22:19,000 Speaker 4: attractiveness to somebody are heavily determined by our identities. 485 00:22:19,160 --> 00:22:24,560 Speaker 2: Interesting, so are we less likely to say our real 486 00:22:25,119 --> 00:22:28,800 Speaker 2: opinion if we are in a group that we identify with? 487 00:22:29,240 --> 00:22:31,280 Speaker 4: Yeah, so it really depends this is what It really 488 00:22:31,359 --> 00:22:33,600 Speaker 4: depends on the norms of the group. So I would 489 00:22:33,600 --> 00:22:36,639 Speaker 4: say there's two big elements to how group identity works. 490 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:38,480 Speaker 4: One is do you care about the group an you 491 00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:40,760 Speaker 4: identify with them? And then the second is what are 492 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:44,359 Speaker 4: the norms of the group. And so some groups have 493 00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:49,000 Speaker 4: wide open, wide arranging debates, and when they do this, 494 00:22:49,080 --> 00:22:51,520 Speaker 4: those groups actually outperform pretty much every other group. 495 00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:53,480 Speaker 3: And if you look in companies, one of my favorite 496 00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:57,040 Speaker 3: studies was in Google teams in the company that had 497 00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:58,800 Speaker 3: kind of what's called psychological safety. 498 00:22:58,800 --> 00:23:01,399 Speaker 4: People felt comfortable chain lenging one another kind of with 499 00:23:01,480 --> 00:23:04,600 Speaker 4: crazy ideas, saying something that went against the status quo. 500 00:23:04,880 --> 00:23:07,639 Speaker 4: Those teams were more successful, and the ones that didn't 501 00:23:07,640 --> 00:23:10,040 Speaker 4: allow that were actually the least successful. 502 00:23:10,080 --> 00:23:10,840 Speaker 3: So those are the ones that. 503 00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:13,800 Speaker 4: Have groupthink in them, where everybody's walking on eggshells or 504 00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:16,960 Speaker 4: they feel uncomfortable speaking in their mind, and so you 505 00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:20,280 Speaker 4: can get that really bad. And throughout history there's lots 506 00:23:20,280 --> 00:23:23,760 Speaker 4: of examples of where organizations and leaders create a group think. 507 00:23:24,440 --> 00:23:27,199 Speaker 4: You see it on all kinds of groups, and so 508 00:23:27,760 --> 00:23:30,199 Speaker 4: that's something that is kind of within the power of 509 00:23:30,240 --> 00:23:32,280 Speaker 4: the group to create. They can create a situation that 510 00:23:32,359 --> 00:23:34,879 Speaker 4: leads to groupthink, or they can create a situation that 511 00:23:34,960 --> 00:23:38,359 Speaker 4: actually makes the group smarter. And I run studies in 512 00:23:38,400 --> 00:23:40,320 Speaker 4: my lab where groups are smarter than a group of 513 00:23:40,359 --> 00:23:42,639 Speaker 4: individuals as long as they feel like they're on the 514 00:23:42,640 --> 00:23:44,119 Speaker 4: same page and they're supporting one another. 515 00:23:44,359 --> 00:23:46,560 Speaker 3: But groups can also become way dumber than. 516 00:23:46,560 --> 00:23:50,280 Speaker 4: Individuals if they have bad culture. 517 00:23:49,920 --> 00:23:50,520 Speaker 3: Of bad norms. 518 00:23:50,600 --> 00:23:51,960 Speaker 1: Right, But that depends on when do. 519 00:23:51,920 --> 00:23:54,640 Speaker 4: You start to get into cults. By the way, version 520 00:23:54,680 --> 00:23:56,240 Speaker 4: of that is cult psychology. 521 00:23:56,480 --> 00:23:56,680 Speaker 3: Right. 522 00:23:56,760 --> 00:23:59,160 Speaker 1: I was just going to say, you need a leader, though, 523 00:23:59,160 --> 00:24:02,960 Speaker 1: correct for us to work, right, So leadership is actually 524 00:24:03,480 --> 00:24:06,640 Speaker 1: oddly anti group think. Good leadership good. 525 00:24:06,840 --> 00:24:09,200 Speaker 3: Yeah, so you've touched on something that most people get wrong. 526 00:24:09,400 --> 00:24:13,320 Speaker 4: Most people think that leadership strong leaders lead to groupthink. 527 00:24:13,720 --> 00:24:18,439 Speaker 4: In reality, strong leaders are critical for stopping groupthink because 528 00:24:18,480 --> 00:24:21,359 Speaker 4: they don't get threatened to when they're challenged. They invite 529 00:24:21,359 --> 00:24:23,520 Speaker 4: other people to take turns talking. So I'll just give 530 00:24:23,520 --> 00:24:25,880 Speaker 4: you an example of how I run my own research lab. 531 00:24:25,920 --> 00:24:28,160 Speaker 4: We have lab meetings once a week. I actually don't 532 00:24:28,200 --> 00:24:31,639 Speaker 4: share my opinion first when we have lab meetings to 533 00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,600 Speaker 4: discuss papers and projects. And the reason for that is 534 00:24:34,600 --> 00:24:36,280 Speaker 4: because I'm in a position of power. If I have 535 00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:38,520 Speaker 4: a strong opinion, people will just agree with me or 536 00:24:38,560 --> 00:24:40,879 Speaker 4: bite their tongue, and so I have to be aware 537 00:24:40,920 --> 00:24:42,480 Speaker 4: of that and kind of like be a little bit 538 00:24:42,560 --> 00:24:44,399 Speaker 4: quiet until I hear what everybody thinks and then I 539 00:24:44,400 --> 00:24:46,479 Speaker 4: can weigh in, and that way I kind of surface 540 00:24:46,520 --> 00:24:50,080 Speaker 4: all the interesting ideas that people have. But you can 541 00:24:50,119 --> 00:24:51,680 Speaker 4: be a strong leader and feel like you have to 542 00:24:51,720 --> 00:24:54,200 Speaker 4: dominate the conversation always and then people will just kind 543 00:24:54,200 --> 00:24:57,560 Speaker 4: of go along or you get really I mean, anybody's 544 00:24:57,560 --> 00:24:58,760 Speaker 4: been on a team where they have a leader who 545 00:24:58,880 --> 00:25:03,160 Speaker 4: gets really snappy, their challenged or insecure, or lashes out 546 00:25:03,280 --> 00:25:04,359 Speaker 4: or needs to take all the credit. 547 00:25:04,760 --> 00:25:06,760 Speaker 3: And that's kind of the recipe that leads to groupthink. 548 00:25:07,680 --> 00:25:10,920 Speaker 2: And if there's a group that ostensibly doesn't have a leader, 549 00:25:10,960 --> 00:25:13,520 Speaker 2: does a leader just naturally emerge anyway? 550 00:25:13,920 --> 00:25:15,440 Speaker 3: Yeah, leaders usually emerge. 551 00:25:15,600 --> 00:25:17,280 Speaker 4: Will I will say, there is this very trendy thing 552 00:25:17,320 --> 00:25:20,840 Speaker 4: to have like slat groups with no leaders, and the 553 00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:22,600 Speaker 4: research is coming out more and more that that's not 554 00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:26,199 Speaker 4: very effective. It's not effective in sports teams, it's not 555 00:25:26,240 --> 00:25:29,800 Speaker 4: effective in most organizations. People like to know who to 556 00:25:29,840 --> 00:25:32,920 Speaker 4: look to, who to trust, who sets the norms and 557 00:25:33,040 --> 00:25:36,000 Speaker 4: is going to be a role model. What you often 558 00:25:36,040 --> 00:25:38,000 Speaker 4: have is if there's no leader, you can say, well, 559 00:25:38,000 --> 00:25:40,320 Speaker 4: we're not going to have a leader. People organically emerge 560 00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:43,200 Speaker 4: to be leader, and the unfortunate thing is sometimes they're 561 00:25:43,200 --> 00:25:46,080 Speaker 4: good and sometimes they're bad. So it's better to be 562 00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:49,160 Speaker 4: smart about thinking about who is good to promote into 563 00:25:49,160 --> 00:25:51,920 Speaker 4: a position of leadership that actually cares about the group, 564 00:25:52,000 --> 00:25:55,040 Speaker 4: that kind of embodies its values, that you know, that 565 00:25:55,200 --> 00:25:56,320 Speaker 4: has the skills to. 566 00:25:56,320 --> 00:25:58,840 Speaker 3: Be an effective leader, and think about how you bring that. 567 00:25:58,880 --> 00:26:00,680 Speaker 4: Person up and train them and so part them rather 568 00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:03,240 Speaker 4: than just say oh, we're not going to ignore leaders. Well, 569 00:26:03,560 --> 00:26:06,080 Speaker 4: leaders are going to form in that situation, in that vacuum, 570 00:26:06,400 --> 00:26:08,080 Speaker 4: and they might not be the person you want. 571 00:26:08,119 --> 00:26:11,240 Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, I mean I I this is one of 572 00:26:11,240 --> 00:26:13,560 Speaker 2: the mistakes that I made in a group situation where 573 00:26:13,600 --> 00:26:16,600 Speaker 2: I was like, oh, well, we'll all it's it's democracy, 574 00:26:16,640 --> 00:26:20,040 Speaker 2: we'll all, you know. And inevitably that led to conflict 575 00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:22,879 Speaker 2: because hierarchies form, and then people resent the hierarchies. And 576 00:26:22,880 --> 00:26:25,920 Speaker 2: it's almost like you do need to implement one, implement 577 00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:29,080 Speaker 2: a hierarchy from the beginning, but just do it mindfully 578 00:26:30,320 --> 00:26:30,680 Speaker 2: so that. 579 00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:33,399 Speaker 1: Yeah, find the person with the most charisma and say no, 580 00:26:34,080 --> 00:26:37,080 Speaker 1: not you. 581 00:26:40,280 --> 00:26:42,920 Speaker 4: I'll tell you the traits that lead to bad leaders. Okay, 582 00:26:43,480 --> 00:26:45,840 Speaker 4: charisma can be good, but not when it comes with 583 00:26:45,920 --> 00:26:46,280 Speaker 4: these things. 584 00:26:46,320 --> 00:26:49,639 Speaker 3: So here's the three. It's called the dark triad. I 585 00:26:49,680 --> 00:26:50,440 Speaker 3: love this name. 586 00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:54,600 Speaker 4: It's people who score high on makum Valianism, so super manipulative, 587 00:26:55,600 --> 00:26:58,000 Speaker 4: people who score high on narcissism, so they think they're 588 00:26:58,040 --> 00:27:00,840 Speaker 4: better than everybody else. And part of it is people 589 00:27:00,840 --> 00:27:03,800 Speaker 4: who score high on psychopathy, so people who have no empathy. 590 00:27:04,280 --> 00:27:06,399 Speaker 4: And if you have those three traits, you have the 591 00:27:06,480 --> 00:27:09,240 Speaker 4: kind of ingredients for a terrible leader. And I'll tell 592 00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:11,679 Speaker 4: you two bad things that happen. One is, there's this 593 00:27:11,760 --> 00:27:15,159 Speaker 4: great book called Snakes and Suits, and they it's an 594 00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:19,080 Speaker 4: analysis of these type of people, especially psychopaths, and in companies. 595 00:27:19,160 --> 00:27:20,800 Speaker 4: As you go up in a company, there tends to 596 00:27:20,800 --> 00:27:24,280 Speaker 4: be more more psychopaths at the top. And they rise 597 00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,800 Speaker 4: because they take credit for everybody else's work. They have 598 00:27:26,920 --> 00:27:31,280 Speaker 4: sharp almos, so they hoard resources and so and then 599 00:27:31,280 --> 00:27:32,760 Speaker 4: they're the worst people to work on it, right, so 600 00:27:32,760 --> 00:27:35,840 Speaker 4: it be absolutely brutal to their staff. But they rise 601 00:27:35,920 --> 00:27:37,879 Speaker 4: up to positions of power because we have a systems 602 00:27:37,880 --> 00:27:38,600 Speaker 4: that reward them. 603 00:27:39,119 --> 00:27:39,720 Speaker 3: Another place. 604 00:27:40,480 --> 00:27:42,760 Speaker 4: The other place I've seen this a study I just 605 00:27:42,760 --> 00:27:44,800 Speaker 4: saw a couple of weeks ago, is with senators. 606 00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:45,520 Speaker 3: So let's go to us. 607 00:27:45,600 --> 00:27:48,080 Speaker 4: Senators the ones who people who are most likely to 608 00:27:48,119 --> 00:27:51,720 Speaker 4: get re elected at like they're on the dark triad. 609 00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:54,000 Speaker 4: They're the people who are more likely to have traits 610 00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:57,320 Speaker 4: that look like narcissism and machiavelianism and psychopathy. 611 00:27:58,040 --> 00:27:58,679 Speaker 3: Here's the problem. 612 00:27:58,680 --> 00:28:01,480 Speaker 4: They're more likely to get reelect, but they're less likely 613 00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:05,320 Speaker 4: to actually pass bills as they're so focused on themselves 614 00:28:05,359 --> 00:28:07,600 Speaker 4: they can't cooperate and get stuff done. And so we 615 00:28:07,680 --> 00:28:11,200 Speaker 4: have also what's happening in organizations where we're having psychopaths 616 00:28:11,240 --> 00:28:14,040 Speaker 4: rise to the top, is happening in politics, that we're 617 00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:16,760 Speaker 4: promoting and re electing leaders who have these terrible sets 618 00:28:16,800 --> 00:28:19,320 Speaker 4: of traits and not electing the ones who actually get 619 00:28:19,359 --> 00:28:22,080 Speaker 4: stuff done for the betterment of society. 620 00:28:22,400 --> 00:28:25,679 Speaker 2: Right, someone who's narcissistic doesn't care about figuring out the 621 00:28:25,680 --> 00:28:28,520 Speaker 2: best solution for the group. They just care about looking 622 00:28:28,640 --> 00:28:32,560 Speaker 2: like they did. Yeah, and why is it that they 623 00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:35,560 Speaker 2: get re elected? I mean, why are we drawn to 624 00:28:35,760 --> 00:28:37,160 Speaker 2: those types of personalities? 625 00:28:37,480 --> 00:28:40,040 Speaker 4: I mean, think about the incentive structure of the media 626 00:28:40,080 --> 00:28:43,360 Speaker 4: and social media to get attention, to get money. It's 627 00:28:43,400 --> 00:28:47,560 Speaker 4: putting yourself out there, making sure that you're the dominant voice. 628 00:28:47,760 --> 00:28:50,000 Speaker 3: It's also taking credit for things you didn't do. That's 629 00:28:50,040 --> 00:28:51,320 Speaker 3: the psychopathy pieces for. 630 00:28:51,280 --> 00:28:55,400 Speaker 4: Being really manipulative and using people like means to an end, 631 00:28:55,480 --> 00:28:57,160 Speaker 4: that's the Macie rebellion and piece. 632 00:28:57,200 --> 00:28:59,240 Speaker 3: So those are actually, it turns out to me, pretty. 633 00:28:59,080 --> 00:29:03,280 Speaker 4: Useful traits for getting power, unfortunately, and we reward them. 634 00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:05,360 Speaker 4: I mean, think of Here's another thing is people who 635 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:09,200 Speaker 4: are often most hostile and social media, even not politicians, 636 00:29:09,680 --> 00:29:12,640 Speaker 4: often score really high on status seeking and narcissism. And 637 00:29:12,680 --> 00:29:16,760 Speaker 4: so everyone's posting non stop, being super aggressive, manipulating people, 638 00:29:16,800 --> 00:29:18,680 Speaker 4: trying to make themselves look good, even if behind the 639 00:29:18,720 --> 00:29:22,600 Speaker 4: scenes they're actually a nasty person. And so that's a 640 00:29:22,640 --> 00:29:26,000 Speaker 4: really useful trait for getting status and attention and credit 641 00:29:26,280 --> 00:29:28,920 Speaker 4: in the technology we've created, Right. 642 00:29:29,080 --> 00:29:32,040 Speaker 1: I think I heard you say somewhere that like sixty 643 00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:36,040 Speaker 1: seven percent more shares come if you say something about 644 00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:40,000 Speaker 1: the other side, not your group. So, yeah, it makes 645 00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:42,720 Speaker 1: sense that we would be rewarding people who are willing 646 00:29:42,760 --> 00:29:43,120 Speaker 1: to do that. 647 00:29:43,320 --> 00:29:43,520 Speaker 4: Yeah. 648 00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:45,560 Speaker 3: Yeah, you're willing to dunk on other people. 649 00:29:46,560 --> 00:29:49,080 Speaker 4: You know, it gets more attention, it gets more followers, 650 00:29:49,120 --> 00:29:51,840 Speaker 4: it gets more shares, it gets more clout. 651 00:29:52,080 --> 00:29:53,680 Speaker 3: But on the other hand, it's usually coming at the 652 00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:55,200 Speaker 3: cost of somebody. 653 00:29:54,920 --> 00:29:59,720 Speaker 2: Right, Okay, so talk to us about how difficult or 654 00:29:59,800 --> 00:30:03,840 Speaker 2: most charge situations can kind of forge a shared identity. 655 00:30:04,160 --> 00:30:07,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, so this is sometimes a good thing, right, when 656 00:30:07,040 --> 00:30:10,440 Speaker 4: there's a crisis, people can come together. So the one 657 00:30:10,440 --> 00:30:12,560 Speaker 4: of the amazing papers we found that we talked about 658 00:30:12,560 --> 00:30:15,360 Speaker 4: the story in our book was there was a plane 659 00:30:15,360 --> 00:30:19,560 Speaker 4: that was hijacked in the seventies by these essentially these terrorists. 660 00:30:20,120 --> 00:30:21,880 Speaker 3: And you know, when you go on a plane, I've 661 00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:23,800 Speaker 3: been on lots of plane rides. You know, I put 662 00:30:23,840 --> 00:30:24,080 Speaker 3: on my. 663 00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:27,160 Speaker 4: Headphones, I watch a movie or I read a book, 664 00:30:27,280 --> 00:30:28,320 Speaker 4: I don't really talk to anybody. 665 00:30:28,360 --> 00:30:29,840 Speaker 3: I don't even really want to talk to anybody. 666 00:30:30,600 --> 00:30:33,000 Speaker 4: And that's how most of us like treat a plane trip, right, 667 00:30:33,520 --> 00:30:36,760 Speaker 4: But when you're hijacked, people all of a sudden developed 668 00:30:36,760 --> 00:30:40,000 Speaker 4: a shared identity as passengers, and they shared resources, shared food, 669 00:30:40,560 --> 00:30:43,479 Speaker 4: they ration things, they support on one another. And so 670 00:30:43,600 --> 00:30:45,520 Speaker 4: in a crisis, people come together. All of a sudden, 671 00:30:45,520 --> 00:30:50,000 Speaker 4: they created a new identity of passengers or hostages. And 672 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:51,960 Speaker 4: so this is what happens in the world all the time. 673 00:30:52,120 --> 00:30:55,440 Speaker 4: Circumstances happen, and they trigger a sense of us, a 674 00:30:55,480 --> 00:30:59,200 Speaker 4: sense of community that pulls together, often against an enemy 675 00:30:59,240 --> 00:31:01,680 Speaker 4: if there is one that's like harming you, And so 676 00:31:01,760 --> 00:31:05,560 Speaker 4: that can be a good thing that creates solidarity and bonding. 677 00:31:05,640 --> 00:31:09,840 Speaker 4: And that's kind of I think the main function of identity, right, 678 00:31:09,880 --> 00:31:11,880 Speaker 4: go back to this evolutionary brain that we have, this 679 00:31:11,960 --> 00:31:15,320 Speaker 4: really old brain. It was creative because humans our main 680 00:31:15,400 --> 00:31:18,720 Speaker 4: capacity that is better than any other primate and almost 681 00:31:18,760 --> 00:31:21,360 Speaker 4: any other mammal or species on earth, is our capacity 682 00:31:21,400 --> 00:31:24,920 Speaker 4: for cooperation. We form groups that we cooperate unlike anything else. 683 00:31:25,880 --> 00:31:27,600 Speaker 4: That's why we can like go to outer space, that's 684 00:31:27,600 --> 00:31:30,080 Speaker 4: why we're all over the globe. It's because we can 685 00:31:30,120 --> 00:31:33,360 Speaker 4: cooperate insane. But of course it can have downside, Right, 686 00:31:33,360 --> 00:31:36,640 Speaker 4: you can cooperate to you know, engage in genocide or 687 00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:39,720 Speaker 4: something really awful too, So cooperation can have a dark 688 00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:41,680 Speaker 4: side if it's used for evil purposes. 689 00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:47,200 Speaker 2: Right, In a cultic situation, frequently the cult leader will 690 00:31:47,280 --> 00:31:51,160 Speaker 2: kind of generate like a heightened experience or it's often 691 00:31:51,200 --> 00:31:54,920 Speaker 2: called mystical manipulation. Would this be kind of fall under 692 00:31:54,920 --> 00:31:57,800 Speaker 2: that category of something that could increase group identity? 693 00:31:58,000 --> 00:32:00,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean that's part of what cult leaders are doing, 694 00:32:00,240 --> 00:32:03,200 Speaker 4: is creating a sense of identity. Often what they're doing 695 00:32:03,280 --> 00:32:06,320 Speaker 4: is against the rest of society. So one of the 696 00:32:06,360 --> 00:32:09,000 Speaker 4: cults we talked about in our book was the Seekers, 697 00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:12,160 Speaker 4: and they said that they had a prophecy. The woman 698 00:32:12,160 --> 00:32:15,120 Speaker 4: who led it had a prophecy there was gonna be 699 00:32:15,160 --> 00:32:17,480 Speaker 4: this massive flood that was going to kill everybody. And 700 00:32:17,560 --> 00:32:19,840 Speaker 4: so this was like the crisis that led people to 701 00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:23,160 Speaker 4: join the cult and stick with it is because they thought, well, 702 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:26,040 Speaker 4: we're part of something special and there's gonna be aliens 703 00:32:26,080 --> 00:32:27,600 Speaker 4: that are going to come down and like save us 704 00:32:27,720 --> 00:32:28,600 Speaker 4: for true believers. 705 00:32:28,880 --> 00:32:32,120 Speaker 3: But it was in response to this potential looming crisis. 706 00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:35,560 Speaker 2: Right, I feel like every element of a cult, it, 707 00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:39,000 Speaker 2: like the defining characteristics of it, are all ones that 708 00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:43,400 Speaker 2: would increase like outgroup animosity and make you know, make 709 00:32:43,520 --> 00:32:45,840 Speaker 2: us hostile to groups that are not our group, because 710 00:32:45,880 --> 00:32:48,800 Speaker 2: everything about it is like it's stripping your identity, it's 711 00:32:48,880 --> 00:32:53,120 Speaker 2: changing your name, it's creating this like heightened emotional experience, 712 00:32:53,160 --> 00:32:55,400 Speaker 2: and like you said, there's often a doomsday which you 713 00:32:55,440 --> 00:32:59,840 Speaker 2: all would unite around. That is that, like those things 714 00:33:00,160 --> 00:33:03,200 Speaker 2: making that shared identity stronger and stronger and stronger and stronger. 715 00:33:03,240 --> 00:33:05,280 Speaker 2: Does that is that part of why it's so hard 716 00:33:05,280 --> 00:33:08,320 Speaker 2: to get people out of cults, because their identities are 717 00:33:08,440 --> 00:33:09,920 Speaker 2: so baked at that point. 718 00:33:10,120 --> 00:33:13,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, So imagine for a cult member, and I magine 719 00:33:13,040 --> 00:33:15,400 Speaker 4: if we gave them the I am blank task, they're 720 00:33:15,400 --> 00:33:16,720 Speaker 4: gonna say, I am you. 721 00:33:16,640 --> 00:33:18,520 Speaker 3: Know, a seeker or whatever their cult is. 722 00:33:18,920 --> 00:33:21,280 Speaker 4: But what the cult's done, and what exactly what you 723 00:33:21,280 --> 00:33:23,920 Speaker 4: describe the leaders done, is stripped away all those other 724 00:33:24,000 --> 00:33:25,000 Speaker 4: parts of their identity. 725 00:33:25,240 --> 00:33:27,160 Speaker 3: So instead of containing five or ten. 726 00:33:27,080 --> 00:33:30,480 Speaker 4: Or twenty different identities like a normal person, they've lost 727 00:33:30,560 --> 00:33:33,000 Speaker 4: all those kind of personal traits that they cared about. 728 00:33:33,280 --> 00:33:35,680 Speaker 4: They've lost all those other identities. They're no longer able 729 00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:37,680 Speaker 4: to engage in the things often that they that they love, 730 00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:40,280 Speaker 4: that are part of who they are. And another thing 731 00:33:40,320 --> 00:33:42,280 Speaker 4: that happens is like if they have let's say family 732 00:33:42,320 --> 00:33:45,200 Speaker 4: or friends outside the cults who are like saying, listen, 733 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:46,800 Speaker 4: this doesn't sound right. You shouldn't be giving all your 734 00:33:46,840 --> 00:33:50,960 Speaker 4: money to this group. The cult often labels them like 735 00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:53,920 Speaker 4: suppressives or some other term and tries to cut you 736 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:56,719 Speaker 4: off actively from your family and friends that used to have. 737 00:33:56,760 --> 00:33:59,080 Speaker 4: They try to also make you quit your job sometimes 738 00:33:59,320 --> 00:34:01,520 Speaker 4: so you can dedicate all your attention to the cult. 739 00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:05,560 Speaker 4: And so what they've done is systematically it's like chopping 740 00:34:05,600 --> 00:34:07,400 Speaker 4: off your limbs, but what they've chopped off is all 741 00:34:07,400 --> 00:34:09,120 Speaker 4: your other sources of identity. 742 00:34:09,400 --> 00:34:09,760 Speaker 1: Hmmm. 743 00:34:10,080 --> 00:34:13,040 Speaker 2: That's a good way to put it. For something like QAnon. 744 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:16,360 Speaker 2: You know, obviously it's all online, but it's just like 745 00:34:16,480 --> 00:34:19,399 Speaker 2: the idea that something big and important is happening, and 746 00:34:19,680 --> 00:34:24,040 Speaker 2: I imagine that also would contribute to increasing that shared identity. 747 00:34:24,320 --> 00:34:26,520 Speaker 4: Yeah, and the special thing that's going to happen too, 748 00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:29,240 Speaker 4: is not just the crisis. In the case of QAnon, 749 00:34:29,320 --> 00:34:31,560 Speaker 4: it was like starting with like the sex trafficking and 750 00:34:31,600 --> 00:34:35,360 Speaker 4: the pizza Gate. But it's also the special knowledge that 751 00:34:35,400 --> 00:34:38,000 Speaker 4: you're part of a group that knows the truth and 752 00:34:38,080 --> 00:34:40,279 Speaker 4: so you are on the inside. And so remember what 753 00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:43,239 Speaker 4: I said the two ingredients were to like really sticky groups, Right. 754 00:34:43,600 --> 00:34:45,880 Speaker 3: It's belongingness, which you have if you're a occult. 755 00:34:45,920 --> 00:34:49,000 Speaker 4: They often are very warm and supportive of you and 756 00:34:49,000 --> 00:34:51,160 Speaker 4: make you feel special in a sense of belonging, especially 757 00:34:51,200 --> 00:34:53,439 Speaker 4: when you first join. And the other thing that offer 758 00:34:53,480 --> 00:34:56,600 Speaker 4: is distinctiveness, is that we have special knowledge, we have 759 00:34:56,600 --> 00:34:59,600 Speaker 4: a special purpose, and we're doing something that's more important 760 00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:03,279 Speaker 4: than the rest to society. And so that's again it's 761 00:35:03,280 --> 00:35:07,040 Speaker 4: scratching those two inches that people have for belonginginess and distinctiveness, 762 00:35:07,280 --> 00:35:09,200 Speaker 4: and that makes cults really sticky for people. 763 00:35:09,440 --> 00:35:12,840 Speaker 1: It seems like the second one is almost more important, 764 00:35:13,040 --> 00:35:16,640 Speaker 1: Like your identity of not being the out group is 765 00:35:16,719 --> 00:35:19,080 Speaker 1: more important than your identity of being the in group. 766 00:35:19,239 --> 00:35:22,279 Speaker 4: Yeah, and they'll often frame the out group as either 767 00:35:22,400 --> 00:35:24,799 Speaker 4: just roobs, like naive or stupid, or. 768 00:35:25,040 --> 00:35:25,960 Speaker 3: Or sometimes sinister. 769 00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:28,759 Speaker 4: Is that like the rest of the world is up 770 00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:32,240 Speaker 4: to has this sinister plot or agenda. They're being controlled 771 00:35:32,239 --> 00:35:35,000 Speaker 4: by people who are manipulating you. So that that's very 772 00:35:35,040 --> 00:35:38,040 Speaker 4: much like the QAnon vibe. And so we're going to 773 00:35:38,120 --> 00:35:40,120 Speaker 4: let you in on a special insider info about how 774 00:35:40,120 --> 00:35:42,920 Speaker 4: it's all corrupt and you can be part of this 775 00:35:43,280 --> 00:35:45,360 Speaker 4: group that's going to be kind of like anti corrupt. 776 00:35:45,560 --> 00:35:47,400 Speaker 4: And so all we think of cults, I think of 777 00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:51,160 Speaker 4: cults as an outsiders like pretty nefarious, manipulative, often abusive, 778 00:35:51,280 --> 00:35:55,160 Speaker 4: physically and sexually abusive and economically abusive groups. 779 00:35:55,440 --> 00:35:56,719 Speaker 3: But from the inside, what. 780 00:35:56,640 --> 00:36:00,560 Speaker 4: They're communicating to is that they're morally special, that they're virtuous, 781 00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:03,400 Speaker 4: and that they're against the things that are bad or 782 00:36:03,440 --> 00:36:04,920 Speaker 4: evil that are happening in the world. 783 00:36:05,800 --> 00:36:10,040 Speaker 2: Yeah, and when when that much animosity happens within the group, 784 00:36:10,120 --> 00:36:12,080 Speaker 2: it can it would make it that much hurder. I 785 00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:16,320 Speaker 2: imagine to then not only lose your belongingness and your distinctiveness, 786 00:36:16,360 --> 00:36:19,319 Speaker 2: but also join this the like the bad ones, the 787 00:36:19,320 --> 00:36:21,879 Speaker 2: bad people. If you if you leave the group, you're 788 00:36:21,880 --> 00:36:23,600 Speaker 2: losing all of these things. I mean, it makes so 789 00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:26,880 Speaker 2: much sense that cult experts frequently talk about how you 790 00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:30,400 Speaker 2: can't directly attack the beliefs of the person in the 791 00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:33,319 Speaker 2: group because they have so much identity tied to it, 792 00:36:33,480 --> 00:36:36,440 Speaker 2: and you have to kind of sneakily get in other ways, 793 00:36:36,480 --> 00:36:38,080 Speaker 2: if you want to get through to someone. 794 00:36:37,960 --> 00:36:39,520 Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I think of this a little bit. 795 00:36:39,560 --> 00:36:41,799 Speaker 4: Sometimes if you're talking to somebody who's really hardcore in 796 00:36:41,840 --> 00:36:44,759 Speaker 4: to politics, like an extremist, it's like you can they 797 00:36:44,760 --> 00:36:46,359 Speaker 4: can tell you something that they read and you can 798 00:36:46,400 --> 00:36:48,400 Speaker 4: debunk it. You can say, well, here's an article call 799 00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:50,799 Speaker 4: that disproves it, and then they just move to the 800 00:36:50,840 --> 00:36:53,359 Speaker 4: next belief that they have. It's it's like, well, your 801 00:36:53,360 --> 00:36:56,120 Speaker 4: group does this, and they don't even like changing their 802 00:36:56,160 --> 00:36:59,200 Speaker 4: beliefs often doesn't move them. And there's research on this 803 00:36:59,280 --> 00:37:01,600 Speaker 4: that if you fact check people's political beliefs. 804 00:37:01,320 --> 00:37:02,640 Speaker 3: That are wrong doesn't change you. 805 00:37:02,719 --> 00:37:04,799 Speaker 4: They're going to vote for And the reason is the 806 00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:08,160 Speaker 4: beliefs are often stemming from the identity rather than the 807 00:37:08,200 --> 00:37:11,439 Speaker 4: other way around. Identity is not emerging from these beliefs, right, 808 00:37:11,560 --> 00:37:14,200 Speaker 4: And so that's the thing about really strong committed identities 809 00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:16,520 Speaker 4: is just like trying to debunk them, which is kind 810 00:37:16,520 --> 00:37:18,759 Speaker 4: of like the rational person's approach, right, like, oh, you 811 00:37:18,760 --> 00:37:20,920 Speaker 4: have these false premises, I'll just like show you evidence 812 00:37:20,960 --> 00:37:23,440 Speaker 4: as are true. This is often what like family members 813 00:37:23,440 --> 00:37:25,279 Speaker 4: will do if they have a friend in a cult. Oh, 814 00:37:25,320 --> 00:37:27,359 Speaker 4: they're lying to you about this or X or did 815 00:37:27,360 --> 00:37:30,640 Speaker 4: you see this EXPOSI found online? But often that's not 816 00:37:30,840 --> 00:37:33,920 Speaker 4: enough to break them from it, because they'll find a 817 00:37:33,920 --> 00:37:36,480 Speaker 4: way to rationalize or justify their beliefs in some other way. 818 00:37:36,600 --> 00:37:39,640 Speaker 2: Right, it's an emotional psychological need that's being met. It's 819 00:37:39,640 --> 00:37:43,480 Speaker 2: not an informational need. We don't need, like facts aren't 820 00:37:43,480 --> 00:37:46,080 Speaker 2: doing anything for any of us. It's like that, it's 821 00:37:46,080 --> 00:37:48,600 Speaker 2: the feelings that the group gives us, or the sense 822 00:37:48,600 --> 00:37:49,600 Speaker 2: of purpose, you know. 823 00:37:49,960 --> 00:37:53,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, And that's why the reasons these groups prey on 824 00:37:53,520 --> 00:37:55,759 Speaker 4: people who are really lonely or don't have a sense 825 00:37:55,800 --> 00:37:59,320 Speaker 4: of purpose or distinctiveness, because they know that once we 826 00:37:59,360 --> 00:38:01,200 Speaker 4: feel that need, it's going to be you know, that 827 00:38:01,239 --> 00:38:02,960 Speaker 4: person's gonna be really committed to the group and have 828 00:38:03,000 --> 00:38:06,399 Speaker 4: a hard time leave it. And so I think that 829 00:38:06,400 --> 00:38:07,960 Speaker 4: that's one thing you have to understand it. It's kind of 830 00:38:07,960 --> 00:38:10,160 Speaker 4: like trying to tell somebody they're not hungry. It's like, well, 831 00:38:10,200 --> 00:38:13,000 Speaker 4: you just ate, didn't you? And if they're hungry, they're 832 00:38:13,000 --> 00:38:15,000 Speaker 4: just gonna be like, I don't care what you told 833 00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:17,440 Speaker 4: people what I just ate? I want more because I 834 00:38:17,440 --> 00:38:21,080 Speaker 4: have a rumbling in my stomach. And so like the 835 00:38:21,560 --> 00:38:23,359 Speaker 4: arguing with them is not going to really convince them 836 00:38:23,360 --> 00:38:24,840 Speaker 4: that they're not hungry, and so it's kind of you 837 00:38:24,880 --> 00:38:27,320 Speaker 4: have to think about it through that need level, that 838 00:38:27,480 --> 00:38:29,480 Speaker 4: their basic needs are being met by this group in 839 00:38:29,520 --> 00:38:32,640 Speaker 4: some pretty deep ways, and so that is something that 840 00:38:32,640 --> 00:38:34,160 Speaker 4: you're going to have to find a way to replace. 841 00:38:34,239 --> 00:38:36,120 Speaker 2: Wow, that is such a good analogy. I'm going to 842 00:38:36,200 --> 00:38:38,480 Speaker 2: steal it from you. 843 00:38:38,480 --> 00:38:40,120 Speaker 3: You feel like you don't have to give me credit. 844 00:38:41,400 --> 00:38:43,880 Speaker 2: I looked you up on rate my professor, and you 845 00:38:43,880 --> 00:38:46,520 Speaker 2: have a four point nine out of five and ninety 846 00:38:46,520 --> 00:38:49,640 Speaker 2: six percent would take your classes again, and I totally 847 00:38:49,719 --> 00:38:52,240 Speaker 2: understand why. Now, Yeah, I. 848 00:38:52,120 --> 00:38:55,120 Speaker 1: Know you're really good at it. So you're really good 849 00:38:55,160 --> 00:38:56,280 Speaker 1: at explaining things. 850 00:38:57,920 --> 00:38:58,640 Speaker 2: No, but I feel like. 851 00:38:58,560 --> 00:39:00,799 Speaker 3: You're enjoying my class any time. 852 00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:02,600 Speaker 4: If you want to talk about cults, I have a 853 00:39:02,680 --> 00:39:04,400 Speaker 4: huge class of three hundred and sixty people and I 854 00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:07,520 Speaker 4: bring in guests. So yeah, very you're interested in cult psychology, 855 00:39:07,560 --> 00:39:08,160 Speaker 4: I'll bring you in. 856 00:39:08,200 --> 00:39:10,440 Speaker 2: I love that. I would love to do that. Yeah, 857 00:39:11,040 --> 00:39:14,920 Speaker 2: just going back to the emotionally charged or difficult situations, 858 00:39:15,520 --> 00:39:17,480 Speaker 2: why do you think to go out to a more 859 00:39:17,520 --> 00:39:20,480 Speaker 2: societal level. Why do you think that nine to eleven 860 00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:23,360 Speaker 2: seemed to bring us together as a country, and wars 861 00:39:23,480 --> 00:39:29,000 Speaker 2: in the past brought Americans together, and COVID just outor 862 00:39:29,120 --> 00:39:31,280 Speaker 2: US apart, it did not have that same effect. 863 00:39:31,880 --> 00:39:34,359 Speaker 4: That's actually a really fantastic question and a hard one 864 00:39:34,400 --> 00:39:37,640 Speaker 4: to wrap your mind around. So one's just a reminder 865 00:39:37,800 --> 00:39:39,200 Speaker 4: and I'll give you some evidence on this. 866 00:39:39,640 --> 00:39:40,400 Speaker 3: After nine to eleven. 867 00:39:41,000 --> 00:39:43,160 Speaker 4: Support for George Bush, who was a president of the 868 00:39:43,239 --> 00:39:46,080 Speaker 4: United States, was around like forty five percent before nine 869 00:39:46,120 --> 00:39:48,000 Speaker 4: to eleven, and within a week it had gone up 870 00:39:48,000 --> 00:39:50,720 Speaker 4: to ninety percent. I think that's the highest approval rating 871 00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:54,400 Speaker 4: ever in history for an American president. And then eventually 872 00:39:54,520 --> 00:39:56,320 Speaker 4: it eroded and by time he left office it was 873 00:39:56,360 --> 00:39:59,439 Speaker 4: like thirty three percent of the lowest, the lowest ever. 874 00:39:59,680 --> 00:40:00,640 Speaker 3: But there was a moment. 875 00:40:00,520 --> 00:40:03,480 Speaker 4: Where there's huge sense of consensus. So why it was 876 00:40:03,520 --> 00:40:07,640 Speaker 4: a specifically attack on America and American values and American symbols, Right, 877 00:40:07,640 --> 00:40:10,040 Speaker 4: So I attacked the World Trade Center and the Pentagon 878 00:40:10,560 --> 00:40:12,279 Speaker 4: and they were going after was it the White House 879 00:40:12,360 --> 00:40:15,240 Speaker 4: or the Capitol? And so it was a specific attack 880 00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:19,520 Speaker 4: on America, and it was by an outside thread, was 881 00:40:19,560 --> 00:40:22,880 Speaker 4: by terrorist group of outsiders from other countries. And so 882 00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:25,919 Speaker 4: this is almost the exact ingredients you need to create 883 00:40:25,920 --> 00:40:29,120 Speaker 4: a sense of shared threat and shared identity. And so 884 00:40:29,160 --> 00:40:31,680 Speaker 4: all of a sudden, things like Republican and Democrat identity 885 00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:33,880 Speaker 4: didn't matter. Or you know, if you're in like New 886 00:40:33,960 --> 00:40:38,359 Speaker 4: York State or California or Ohio or Idaho, that didn't matter. 887 00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:40,040 Speaker 3: It was a sense of America. 888 00:40:40,880 --> 00:40:43,120 Speaker 4: And by the way, people in you know, the other 889 00:40:43,200 --> 00:40:45,560 Speaker 4: parts of the country other than New York were. 890 00:40:45,360 --> 00:40:46,760 Speaker 3: Very anxious and threatened. 891 00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:49,800 Speaker 4: Even if they were like in rural Nebraska, they felt 892 00:40:49,800 --> 00:40:52,360 Speaker 4: like that they could be the targets of a terrorist threat. 893 00:40:52,880 --> 00:40:55,719 Speaker 4: And so you might say, well, that's irrational, that's kind 894 00:40:55,719 --> 00:40:58,080 Speaker 4: of what you know a person would have said to them, 895 00:40:58,160 --> 00:41:00,239 Speaker 4: But it didn't matter. That's what they felt. Felt that 896 00:41:00,280 --> 00:41:04,360 Speaker 4: their identity was under attack and seriously threatened. And so 897 00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:08,640 Speaker 4: that was the ingredients of nine to eleven. And obviously 898 00:41:08,719 --> 00:41:10,440 Speaker 4: we now know nine to eleven led to all these 899 00:41:10,520 --> 00:41:14,359 Speaker 4: terrible policy decisions and death and disaster in Iraq and Afghanistan, 900 00:41:15,440 --> 00:41:18,719 Speaker 4: and and hate crimes went up against you know, Muslims 901 00:41:18,760 --> 00:41:20,560 Speaker 4: in the United States. I had all these you know, 902 00:41:20,800 --> 00:41:23,840 Speaker 4: just because you rally together if there's a targeted outsider 903 00:41:23,880 --> 00:41:26,799 Speaker 4: who looks like this person, it can lead to kind 904 00:41:26,800 --> 00:41:29,440 Speaker 4: of collateral damage, of harassment and hate crimes against those 905 00:41:29,440 --> 00:41:32,640 Speaker 4: people in America, even if they don't support terrorism at all, 906 00:41:33,400 --> 00:41:33,719 Speaker 4: even if. 907 00:41:33,640 --> 00:41:36,200 Speaker 3: They're born in America, right, they're true Americans in every sense. 908 00:41:36,680 --> 00:41:39,279 Speaker 4: Okay, So that that is what the psychology there was, 909 00:41:40,600 --> 00:41:42,480 Speaker 4: and now the psychology of the pandemic, it could have 910 00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:46,239 Speaker 4: been like that, but it mattered a lot how it's 911 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:48,640 Speaker 4: handled handled by leaders. And so what happened in the 912 00:41:48,760 --> 00:41:51,160 Speaker 4: United States is and I've done a lot of research 913 00:41:51,239 --> 00:41:53,719 Speaker 4: on the pandemic, and why I got polarized, why it 914 00:41:53,719 --> 00:41:55,800 Speaker 4: happened in the United States is because I think Donald 915 00:41:55,840 --> 00:41:59,279 Speaker 4: Trump and especially like Fox News and influencers who are 916 00:41:59,280 --> 00:42:02,160 Speaker 4: supporting Donald Trum down played the risk of the pandemic, 917 00:42:02,680 --> 00:42:05,360 Speaker 4: and Democratic leaders took. 918 00:42:05,120 --> 00:42:05,880 Speaker 3: It very seriously. 919 00:42:06,239 --> 00:42:08,520 Speaker 4: And so Trump was saying in January that it wasn't 920 00:42:08,560 --> 00:42:10,880 Speaker 4: going to be a big deal. He said this through February, 921 00:42:10,880 --> 00:42:12,640 Speaker 4: he said this into March. I have like all the 922 00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:16,240 Speaker 4: video clips of it. As early as January. Joe Biden, 923 00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:19,000 Speaker 4: who wasn't even the nominee yet for the Democrats, wrote 924 00:42:19,040 --> 00:42:21,919 Speaker 4: an article in USA Today saying Trump was the worst 925 00:42:21,960 --> 00:42:24,600 Speaker 4: possible leader to handle the pandemic, and so he had 926 00:42:24,600 --> 00:42:27,839 Speaker 4: like the future president and future leader of Democrats and 927 00:42:27,880 --> 00:42:31,960 Speaker 4: the leader of Republicans treating it very differently. And that 928 00:42:32,040 --> 00:42:34,800 Speaker 4: happened throughout much of the pandemic, and things changed a 929 00:42:34,840 --> 00:42:37,680 Speaker 4: little bit. But the you know, Democrats were locked down 930 00:42:37,760 --> 00:42:41,120 Speaker 4: much more. You know, Trump was throwing huge like campaign 931 00:42:41,200 --> 00:42:44,200 Speaker 4: rallies and events when it wasn't when it wasn't advisable 932 00:42:44,200 --> 00:42:47,719 Speaker 4: before vaccines were available. And so the pandemic here and 933 00:42:47,760 --> 00:42:50,320 Speaker 4: all the data backs is up, was polarized from the 934 00:42:50,440 --> 00:42:54,240 Speaker 4: very earliest stages, from February and March of twenty twenty, 935 00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:57,880 Speaker 4: and it never really returned. Republicans were more against masks, 936 00:42:57,920 --> 00:42:59,920 Speaker 4: they were far less likely to get vaccinated. 937 00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:02,000 Speaker 3: In fact, we have some data showing. 938 00:43:01,840 --> 00:43:05,000 Speaker 4: That whether you're from a Republican or Democratic part of 939 00:43:05,000 --> 00:43:07,600 Speaker 4: the country, it was the single biggest predictor of vaccination rates. 940 00:43:07,920 --> 00:43:09,800 Speaker 4: We talked a lot about things like race or socio 941 00:43:09,800 --> 00:43:14,880 Speaker 4: economic status, poverty, education, none of those things was remotely 942 00:43:14,880 --> 00:43:17,080 Speaker 4: close to just your partisan affiliation. 943 00:43:18,440 --> 00:43:20,240 Speaker 3: Okay, so that gives you a sense. 944 00:43:20,000 --> 00:43:23,960 Speaker 4: Of how that worked and so, but it didn't have 945 00:43:24,040 --> 00:43:26,719 Speaker 4: to be that case. I looked in data sixty seven 946 00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:30,240 Speaker 4: countries in a study I ran and whether you're conservative 947 00:43:30,320 --> 00:43:33,560 Speaker 4: or liberal was almost completely uncorrelated with your attitude towards 948 00:43:33,800 --> 00:43:36,719 Speaker 4: the pandemic around the rest of the world, and so 949 00:43:37,080 --> 00:43:39,839 Speaker 4: it didn't have to be polarized in the US. If 950 00:43:39,840 --> 00:43:42,399 Speaker 4: Trump had taken it seriously from day one, you would 951 00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:45,080 Speaker 4: have seen no polarization. That would have been much more 952 00:43:45,080 --> 00:43:47,600 Speaker 4: of a source of shared identity. So that's why leaders 953 00:43:47,600 --> 00:43:49,880 Speaker 4: are so important. They can make things a source to 954 00:43:49,960 --> 00:43:54,680 Speaker 4: rally together or divide people and focus on different groups 955 00:43:54,760 --> 00:43:57,160 Speaker 4: and political parties instead of American identity. 956 00:43:57,840 --> 00:44:01,600 Speaker 2: Right, yeah, yeah. And actually, if you do identify as 957 00:44:01,600 --> 00:44:04,080 Speaker 2: a Democrat or a liberal, whatever, your leadership is saying 958 00:44:04,280 --> 00:44:07,120 Speaker 2: one thing, Like if Democrats had also decided to not 959 00:44:07,160 --> 00:44:09,279 Speaker 2: take it seriously, maybe we would have all united around 960 00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:12,399 Speaker 2: not taking it seriously. But our different leaders were saying 961 00:44:12,440 --> 00:44:16,080 Speaker 2: different things, which was also very confusing. I think for 962 00:44:16,440 --> 00:44:17,080 Speaker 2: real other. 963 00:44:16,960 --> 00:44:19,600 Speaker 3: People, it's a health disaster. 964 00:44:19,680 --> 00:44:22,240 Speaker 4: I think I ran the numbers on from Canada. In Canada, 965 00:44:22,320 --> 00:44:25,880 Speaker 4: there's polarizations a conservative party, liberal party. But there was 966 00:44:25,920 --> 00:44:28,440 Speaker 4: a really good study analyzing their leaders rhetoric in the 967 00:44:28,480 --> 00:44:31,480 Speaker 4: early months of the pandemic, and they both took it seriously. 968 00:44:31,800 --> 00:44:33,560 Speaker 3: And then you look at national polls. 969 00:44:33,239 --> 00:44:36,799 Speaker 4: And Canadians both from across the spectrum ticket seriously, and 970 00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:39,280 Speaker 4: that changed after a couple of years in vaccine mandates. 971 00:44:39,280 --> 00:44:41,400 Speaker 4: But for two years and then the death rate in 972 00:44:41,440 --> 00:44:45,239 Speaker 4: Canada was way way lower than the United States, And 973 00:44:45,320 --> 00:44:48,360 Speaker 4: so it was totally something that could have gone another 974 00:44:48,400 --> 00:44:50,919 Speaker 4: way if if leaders had been on the same page 975 00:44:50,960 --> 00:44:51,239 Speaker 4: about it. 976 00:44:51,239 --> 00:44:51,680 Speaker 3: In the US. 977 00:44:52,080 --> 00:44:55,200 Speaker 2: I mean, it's just it's it's very scary. I mean, 978 00:44:55,640 --> 00:44:58,600 Speaker 2: the wrong leader, just saying the wrong thing can have 979 00:44:58,760 --> 00:45:02,160 Speaker 2: such an impact on and so many lives. I have 980 00:45:02,320 --> 00:45:04,319 Speaker 2: nothing smart to say about that other than that I 981 00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:08,839 Speaker 2: wish that we weren't so drawn to the dark triad characteristics. 982 00:45:08,880 --> 00:45:11,000 Speaker 2: I mean, I wish that there was something that we 983 00:45:11,040 --> 00:45:15,480 Speaker 2: could do to not make ourselves want to follow the really, 984 00:45:15,520 --> 00:45:18,360 Speaker 2: really loud, self obsessed people. 985 00:45:19,400 --> 00:45:20,759 Speaker 4: Yeah, I mean, this is this is one of the 986 00:45:20,800 --> 00:45:22,799 Speaker 4: reasons we wrote our book is to try to teach 987 00:45:22,800 --> 00:45:25,760 Speaker 4: people about how groups work so they can make them better. 988 00:45:25,840 --> 00:45:27,799 Speaker 4: You know, whether it's like their own, like you know, 989 00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:31,919 Speaker 4: fan group, or there's any trivia club or something like that, 990 00:45:32,280 --> 00:45:35,520 Speaker 4: or their daughter's soccer team they're coaching, or if it's 991 00:45:35,560 --> 00:45:38,400 Speaker 4: like society. We have to understand how we're being manipulated, 992 00:45:38,680 --> 00:45:41,600 Speaker 4: how identity is often being used against us, and that's 993 00:45:41,680 --> 00:45:44,359 Speaker 4: the that's the part of cult psychology that's so interesting, right, Like, 994 00:45:44,680 --> 00:45:47,120 Speaker 4: if you understand how you're being manipulated, how they're cutting 995 00:45:47,120 --> 00:45:49,319 Speaker 4: you off from family and friends, how they're eliminating your 996 00:45:49,360 --> 00:45:52,359 Speaker 4: other sources of identity, then maybe you'll be like, you'll 997 00:45:52,360 --> 00:45:55,160 Speaker 4: have a little like spidy sense. It gets tingled when 998 00:45:55,200 --> 00:45:57,400 Speaker 4: you interact with somebody who's trying to like, you know, 999 00:45:57,560 --> 00:45:59,880 Speaker 4: lure you into a group with those types of traits, 1000 00:46:00,040 --> 00:46:03,280 Speaker 4: you'll identify it as more toxic and escape it sooner. 1001 00:46:03,640 --> 00:46:05,879 Speaker 4: And so that's kind of the thing that we want 1002 00:46:05,920 --> 00:46:07,800 Speaker 4: to do, is like if you give people the knowledge, 1003 00:46:07,960 --> 00:46:09,320 Speaker 4: you're building up their own immunity. 1004 00:46:09,360 --> 00:46:10,640 Speaker 3: You know, we'll go back to the pandemic. 1005 00:46:10,880 --> 00:46:12,799 Speaker 4: It's kind of like building up their own immunity to 1006 00:46:12,800 --> 00:46:14,920 Speaker 4: when they encounter that because it is like a virus 1007 00:46:15,680 --> 00:46:17,920 Speaker 4: and it's contagious and it can be very damaging to 1008 00:46:17,960 --> 00:46:18,640 Speaker 4: groups of people. 1009 00:46:20,680 --> 00:46:23,759 Speaker 2: How does group identity evolve from just feeling connected to 1010 00:46:24,000 --> 00:46:26,759 Speaker 2: our group to just straight up hating people in the 1011 00:46:26,760 --> 00:46:30,040 Speaker 2: other group. That is that a leadership thing or is 1012 00:46:30,080 --> 00:46:33,439 Speaker 2: that more like something charged happens and we need someone 1013 00:46:33,440 --> 00:46:35,640 Speaker 2: to blame for it like, how does that happen? 1014 00:46:35,920 --> 00:46:36,680 Speaker 3: A great question? 1015 00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:39,200 Speaker 4: So usually I started with that great study where people 1016 00:46:39,200 --> 00:46:40,800 Speaker 4: flip a coin and great two groups. 1017 00:46:41,640 --> 00:46:43,440 Speaker 3: That usually doesn't lead to outgroup hat. 1018 00:46:44,160 --> 00:46:46,200 Speaker 4: In fact, we've find lots of studies and usually what 1019 00:46:46,239 --> 00:46:48,520 Speaker 4: it does is just boost your positive feelings towards the 1020 00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:50,880 Speaker 4: in group and wanting resources for the in group. But 1021 00:46:50,880 --> 00:46:53,120 Speaker 4: it doesn't necessarily lead you to want to dislike or 1022 00:46:53,120 --> 00:46:57,280 Speaker 4: punish the outgroup. The really the height of the outgroup 1023 00:46:57,560 --> 00:47:02,719 Speaker 4: stems from leadership. It stems developing specific negative stereotypes about them, 1024 00:47:03,200 --> 00:47:05,200 Speaker 4: and I would argue the two other biggest things that 1025 00:47:05,280 --> 00:47:09,200 Speaker 4: drive it are competition for scarce resources, so like only 1026 00:47:09,239 --> 00:47:12,000 Speaker 4: one party gets power or only one group gets the 1027 00:47:12,000 --> 00:47:16,239 Speaker 4: sacred land. And then the other part about sacred is 1028 00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:19,399 Speaker 4: morality is once you think the other group is doing 1029 00:47:19,400 --> 00:47:23,040 Speaker 4: something evil, then it's impossible to cooperate with them. 1030 00:47:23,280 --> 00:47:26,440 Speaker 3: It's one thing that I think that other group's just stupid. 1031 00:47:26,440 --> 00:47:29,520 Speaker 4: Or incompetent, because you can always like work with them 1032 00:47:29,680 --> 00:47:32,160 Speaker 4: or cooperate with them at some level. But if you 1033 00:47:32,200 --> 00:47:34,560 Speaker 4: think they're doing something evil, you will do everything you 1034 00:47:34,600 --> 00:47:36,840 Speaker 4: can to stop them. You'll really despise them. And so 1035 00:47:36,960 --> 00:47:38,919 Speaker 4: a lot of the rhetoric of leaders who are really 1036 00:47:38,960 --> 00:47:42,400 Speaker 4: kind of the bad kind of leaders or cult leaders 1037 00:47:42,640 --> 00:47:44,960 Speaker 4: are trying to convince you that this other group or 1038 00:47:44,960 --> 00:47:47,040 Speaker 4: this other thing happening is actually evil. It's not just 1039 00:47:47,080 --> 00:47:50,560 Speaker 4: that it's wrong or that it's dumb, but that it's evil. 1040 00:47:51,000 --> 00:47:54,000 Speaker 4: And that seems to be a real motivator to mobilize 1041 00:47:54,000 --> 00:47:56,359 Speaker 4: people into a tight group, but also to get them 1042 00:47:56,360 --> 00:47:57,879 Speaker 4: to really hate that other group. 1043 00:47:58,200 --> 00:48:01,960 Speaker 2: Right, That's so interesting was making connections in many different 1044 00:48:01,960 --> 00:48:05,200 Speaker 2: areas of life as you were saying that, you know, 1045 00:48:05,239 --> 00:48:07,400 Speaker 2: I see that on both sides of the political aisle. 1046 00:48:07,560 --> 00:48:10,520 Speaker 2: For sure, there's a moralizing how the other people must 1047 00:48:10,520 --> 00:48:14,759 Speaker 2: possess no morality whatsoever, and also in culture groups and 1048 00:48:14,800 --> 00:48:18,000 Speaker 2: the way that you know, often the public will look 1049 00:48:18,080 --> 00:48:20,480 Speaker 2: at a look at members of a cult and assume 1050 00:48:20,520 --> 00:48:22,600 Speaker 2: that they are all evil rather than that they are 1051 00:48:22,640 --> 00:48:26,759 Speaker 2: being manipulated or abused in some way. And then you know, 1052 00:48:26,840 --> 00:48:30,160 Speaker 2: that can just lead to further like the people in 1053 00:48:30,200 --> 00:48:32,319 Speaker 2: the group doubling down on what they believe because they're 1054 00:48:32,360 --> 00:48:34,000 Speaker 2: being told that they're evil, which is an attack on 1055 00:48:34,040 --> 00:48:34,680 Speaker 2: their identity. 1056 00:48:35,440 --> 00:48:37,279 Speaker 4: Yeah yeah, yeah, So that's the other thing that really 1057 00:48:37,280 --> 00:48:39,480 Speaker 4: gets people to rally, and this happens a lot with 1058 00:48:39,520 --> 00:48:40,680 Speaker 4: polarization in the US. 1059 00:48:40,760 --> 00:48:41,319 Speaker 3: Is one of the. 1060 00:48:41,320 --> 00:48:43,200 Speaker 4: Reasons people hate the other party is because they think 1061 00:48:43,239 --> 00:48:46,120 Speaker 4: the other party really hates them. And so if you 1062 00:48:46,200 --> 00:48:48,160 Speaker 4: just communicate that actually, the other group doesn't hate you 1063 00:48:48,239 --> 00:48:50,440 Speaker 4: nearly as much as you think, they chill out a 1064 00:48:50,480 --> 00:48:51,920 Speaker 4: little bit and become much more open. 1065 00:48:51,760 --> 00:48:53,360 Speaker 3: Minded and willing to engage with that person. 1066 00:48:53,680 --> 00:48:56,200 Speaker 4: But part of it is they've been told constantly by 1067 00:48:56,400 --> 00:49:00,920 Speaker 4: leaders by like extreme TV and news and radio and 1068 00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:03,440 Speaker 4: social media that they're watching that the other party on 1069 00:49:03,480 --> 00:49:06,160 Speaker 4: average really despises and disrespects them and hates them and 1070 00:49:06,160 --> 00:49:08,480 Speaker 4: thinks they're evil. And so that's one of the things 1071 00:49:08,520 --> 00:49:11,360 Speaker 4: that is a real way to create conflict is just 1072 00:49:11,440 --> 00:49:13,719 Speaker 4: convince people that the other side hates them. 1073 00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:16,319 Speaker 3: Right, Oh, it's kind of like I tell you all 1074 00:49:16,320 --> 00:49:17,480 Speaker 3: the ways you're being manipulated. 1075 00:49:17,560 --> 00:49:19,400 Speaker 4: I also realized, like this would be terrible if some 1076 00:49:19,480 --> 00:49:21,120 Speaker 4: dictator got a hold of this podcast. 1077 00:49:21,719 --> 00:49:25,240 Speaker 1: No dictators, listen to this, turn it off right now. 1078 00:49:25,520 --> 00:49:26,920 Speaker 3: The toolbox for manipulation. 1079 00:49:27,040 --> 00:49:30,279 Speaker 2: Unfortunately, I'm literally in a Netflix series called How to 1080 00:49:30,320 --> 00:49:33,040 Speaker 2: Become a Cult Leader. I'm in I am in that series, 1081 00:49:33,080 --> 00:49:34,960 Speaker 2: but I don't want anyone to actually do it. 1082 00:49:35,239 --> 00:49:36,800 Speaker 1: No, No, don't do it. 1083 00:49:38,120 --> 00:49:41,680 Speaker 2: So if somebody wanted to intervene with someone and we 1084 00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:43,520 Speaker 2: talked about it a little, but maybe you have more 1085 00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:45,680 Speaker 2: wisdom on this. With someone who's in a cult or 1086 00:49:45,719 --> 00:49:48,520 Speaker 2: like really lodged in a group, thinky situation, like what 1087 00:49:48,640 --> 00:49:51,040 Speaker 2: would be a constructive way to signal to that person 1088 00:49:51,040 --> 00:49:53,840 Speaker 2: that you are not the enemy and kind of start 1089 00:49:53,880 --> 00:49:54,600 Speaker 2: a conversation. 1090 00:49:54,840 --> 00:49:56,440 Speaker 4: Yeah, So the first thing I would say is like, 1091 00:49:56,680 --> 00:49:59,640 Speaker 4: don't attack their beliefs, like we talked about, try to listen, 1092 00:50:00,040 --> 00:50:02,080 Speaker 4: understand where they're coming from and what this group's doing 1093 00:50:02,080 --> 00:50:05,000 Speaker 4: for them. Another thing you can do is ask them questions, Oh, 1094 00:50:05,040 --> 00:50:06,520 Speaker 4: why do you stick with them? 1095 00:50:06,920 --> 00:50:08,440 Speaker 3: What do you like about them? 1096 00:50:09,120 --> 00:50:11,000 Speaker 4: You know, ask them questions that get them to think 1097 00:50:11,040 --> 00:50:13,640 Speaker 4: more critically and deeply about what they're doing. 1098 00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:15,920 Speaker 3: And people often really comfortable with that. 1099 00:50:16,400 --> 00:50:18,439 Speaker 4: And then sometimes they realize they don't know why they're 1100 00:50:18,440 --> 00:50:20,600 Speaker 4: doing it, or it starts to not make sense to them. 1101 00:50:20,760 --> 00:50:23,640 Speaker 4: But you know, this is just like classic socratic questioning, 1102 00:50:24,400 --> 00:50:25,840 Speaker 4: and it gets them to realize, like some of the 1103 00:50:25,840 --> 00:50:28,440 Speaker 4: explanations they've been told don't make sense, some of the 1104 00:50:28,520 --> 00:50:31,120 Speaker 4: stories they've heard at the cult don't make sense. 1105 00:50:32,000 --> 00:50:34,080 Speaker 3: So that's one thing. You can do the other thing. 1106 00:50:34,160 --> 00:50:35,239 Speaker 3: And this is really key. 1107 00:50:35,239 --> 00:50:36,760 Speaker 4: And this is for like, let's say if your family 1108 00:50:36,760 --> 00:50:40,160 Speaker 4: members are deeping QAnon and I have an uncle who 1109 00:50:40,200 --> 00:50:43,200 Speaker 4: I think has gone down that rabbit hole. It really sucks. 1110 00:50:43,280 --> 00:50:46,120 Speaker 4: I really care about this person. The instinct you have 1111 00:50:46,320 --> 00:50:48,640 Speaker 4: and I have, is like cut them off, block them 1112 00:50:48,640 --> 00:50:52,040 Speaker 4: on social media, don't engage with them. And over time 1113 00:50:52,080 --> 00:50:54,560 Speaker 4: I realize that's probably the wrong instinct. What you want 1114 00:50:54,600 --> 00:50:56,840 Speaker 4: to do is keep an open relationship with them so 1115 00:50:56,880 --> 00:50:59,640 Speaker 4: that when they're ready to come out, that they know 1116 00:50:59,719 --> 00:51:01,080 Speaker 4: that they can talk to you and you will be 1117 00:51:01,080 --> 00:51:03,279 Speaker 4: supportive and non judgmental. And I think if it is 1118 00:51:03,320 --> 00:51:05,239 Speaker 4: similar to like someone who's imagine you had a friend 1119 00:51:05,239 --> 00:51:07,759 Speaker 4: and I've had a friend in an abusive relationship and 1120 00:51:07,800 --> 00:51:10,480 Speaker 4: they're not ready to leave it. You can't just drag 1121 00:51:10,560 --> 00:51:12,359 Speaker 4: them out of it. They've got to be ready to leave. 1122 00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:14,759 Speaker 4: But it's really important that they know that they have 1123 00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:16,600 Speaker 4: supports when they are ready to leave, because if they've 1124 00:51:16,600 --> 00:51:19,120 Speaker 4: lost all those connections and supports, which is by the way, 1125 00:51:19,120 --> 00:51:22,319 Speaker 4: that's what abusive partners do is cut their partners off 1126 00:51:22,360 --> 00:51:25,880 Speaker 4: from all their family and friends and isolate them. Is 1127 00:51:26,160 --> 00:51:28,200 Speaker 4: you need to be there so that they know that 1128 00:51:28,239 --> 00:51:30,360 Speaker 4: they have a rope to escape. And so that's the 1129 00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:31,960 Speaker 4: other thing is you need to be there. I think 1130 00:51:32,000 --> 00:51:34,320 Speaker 4: if you have someone who's gone down this extreme pathway 1131 00:51:34,360 --> 00:51:38,040 Speaker 4: into these kind of cult or conspiracy mentalities, that you're 1132 00:51:38,080 --> 00:51:39,920 Speaker 4: going to be there, that you're going to be non judgmental, 1133 00:51:39,920 --> 00:51:41,399 Speaker 4: that you're going to support them, that you care about 1134 00:51:41,400 --> 00:51:44,040 Speaker 4: them as a person, regardless of if you disagree on 1135 00:51:44,080 --> 00:51:44,640 Speaker 4: this thing. 1136 00:51:44,640 --> 00:51:45,960 Speaker 3: You shouldn't obviously agree on. 1137 00:51:45,920 --> 00:51:48,160 Speaker 4: It, but I think it's like important to signal that 1138 00:51:48,200 --> 00:51:51,600 Speaker 4: you're there check in on them, because what happens is 1139 00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:53,160 Speaker 4: as they go deeper and deeper than the cult, that's 1140 00:51:53,160 --> 00:51:54,600 Speaker 4: often the first stage. 1141 00:51:54,640 --> 00:51:55,480 Speaker 3: They often enjoy it. 1142 00:51:55,480 --> 00:51:57,480 Speaker 4: It's a group of people, it's really fun, it's engaging, 1143 00:51:57,719 --> 00:52:01,239 Speaker 4: presence of community, of belonging, distinctiveness. But then often once 1144 00:52:01,280 --> 00:52:04,799 Speaker 4: you go deeper down, then you start to get manipulated, abused, 1145 00:52:05,920 --> 00:52:10,600 Speaker 4: black blackmail, misled, And so you want to be there 1146 00:52:10,640 --> 00:52:12,759 Speaker 4: for when they start to realize that's too much and 1147 00:52:12,800 --> 00:52:15,120 Speaker 4: they start having these feelings of like cognitive dissonance, like 1148 00:52:15,120 --> 00:52:16,000 Speaker 4: this doesn't feel right. 1149 00:52:16,719 --> 00:52:17,960 Speaker 3: You want to be there to let them know that 1150 00:52:17,960 --> 00:52:19,239 Speaker 3: there's some offend for them. 1151 00:52:19,400 --> 00:52:19,600 Speaker 1: Right. 1152 00:52:19,719 --> 00:52:23,080 Speaker 2: Literally yesterday, a very good friend of mine who has 1153 00:52:23,120 --> 00:52:25,919 Speaker 2: been in what, in my opinion, is an abusive relationship, 1154 00:52:26,640 --> 00:52:29,840 Speaker 2: called me. And they have no other friends left in 1155 00:52:29,880 --> 00:52:33,320 Speaker 2: their life, but called me and asked if I would 1156 00:52:33,360 --> 00:52:34,920 Speaker 2: support them if they left their partner. 1157 00:52:35,160 --> 00:52:41,000 Speaker 6: Oh wow, So what did you do to signal to 1158 00:52:41,040 --> 00:52:43,520 Speaker 6: that friend that it was safe at any time to 1159 00:52:43,600 --> 00:52:45,640 Speaker 6: call you even though they have no more friends and 1160 00:52:45,920 --> 00:52:47,160 Speaker 6: family in touch with them. 1161 00:52:47,560 --> 00:52:50,560 Speaker 2: Well, initially my response to their partner was to be like, 1162 00:52:50,719 --> 00:52:52,560 Speaker 2: they're bad, they're bad for you, look at what they're doing, 1163 00:52:52,600 --> 00:52:54,960 Speaker 2: They're bad for you. That clearly didn't work, so I 1164 00:52:55,080 --> 00:52:58,440 Speaker 2: changed tack and started telling them I support whatever decision 1165 00:52:58,480 --> 00:53:00,279 Speaker 2: you make. I want you to be happy, and if 1166 00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:02,840 Speaker 2: this is making you happy, I support that and just 1167 00:53:02,880 --> 00:53:05,360 Speaker 2: continue to call them even when I wasn't really hearing 1168 00:53:05,360 --> 00:53:08,399 Speaker 2: from them a lot. So you know, listen, maybe they won't, 1169 00:53:08,440 --> 00:53:11,400 Speaker 2: maybe this attempt won't succeed, because that's very common, but 1170 00:53:11,520 --> 00:53:14,120 Speaker 2: it does make me feel like, Okay, I did I 1171 00:53:14,160 --> 00:53:14,759 Speaker 2: did the right thing. 1172 00:53:15,040 --> 00:53:18,440 Speaker 4: Yeah, amazing, that's like, you know, almost textbook what I 1173 00:53:18,440 --> 00:53:19,440 Speaker 4: would have recommended. 1174 00:53:19,520 --> 00:53:20,439 Speaker 3: So it sounds like you. 1175 00:53:20,680 --> 00:53:23,480 Speaker 4: It's just now take that and apply that to a 1176 00:53:23,480 --> 00:53:26,800 Speaker 4: friend who's in a cult or conspiratorial community? 1177 00:53:26,880 --> 00:53:27,200 Speaker 2: Right? 1178 00:53:27,360 --> 00:53:32,920 Speaker 1: Totally. Ugh, it's exciting. Yeah, it's exciting to make all 1179 00:53:32,920 --> 00:53:33,759 Speaker 1: these connections. 1180 00:53:33,840 --> 00:53:39,000 Speaker 2: I know, are groups good? Can they be good? I 1181 00:53:39,040 --> 00:53:41,680 Speaker 2: just feel like there's so much potential for bad and 1182 00:53:41,719 --> 00:53:43,080 Speaker 2: I know they can be good, but I need you 1183 00:53:43,160 --> 00:53:43,600 Speaker 2: to tell me. 1184 00:53:44,160 --> 00:53:48,239 Speaker 4: Okay, so this is a conceptual Well, first, let me 1185 00:53:48,280 --> 00:53:50,279 Speaker 4: ask you both off the top of your head, on average, 1186 00:53:50,440 --> 00:53:53,399 Speaker 4: ignoring what I've talked about today, do you think groups. 1187 00:53:53,040 --> 00:53:55,960 Speaker 3: Are forces for good or evil in the world? Are neutral? 1188 00:53:56,160 --> 00:53:56,440 Speaker 1: Both? 1189 00:53:56,600 --> 00:53:56,880 Speaker 6: Both? 1190 00:53:57,040 --> 00:53:57,239 Speaker 2: Yah? 1191 00:53:57,400 --> 00:53:57,680 Speaker 1: Both? 1192 00:53:57,800 --> 00:53:58,240 Speaker 2: Yeah? 1193 00:53:58,440 --> 00:53:58,680 Speaker 3: Both? 1194 00:53:59,239 --> 00:54:02,120 Speaker 2: But I would say in the past, like a few years, 1195 00:54:02,440 --> 00:54:05,800 Speaker 2: it's I just feel like I'm getting inundated with evidence 1196 00:54:05,920 --> 00:54:09,640 Speaker 2: of their badness, so it's hard for me to like 1197 00:54:09,800 --> 00:54:12,200 Speaker 2: remember that there is goodness to it as well. 1198 00:54:12,239 --> 00:54:14,680 Speaker 1: And I've never been in a good group project, so. 1199 00:54:15,360 --> 00:54:17,160 Speaker 2: Your projects are the worst. 1200 00:54:17,680 --> 00:54:20,080 Speaker 1: So I'm going to go with leaning towards back. 1201 00:54:20,160 --> 00:54:24,400 Speaker 4: Yeah, okay, So I think groups are both. They had 1202 00:54:24,400 --> 00:54:26,680 Speaker 4: the potential to be good or bad. It's the leadership 1203 00:54:26,719 --> 00:54:29,040 Speaker 4: and the and the culture norms we create in them 1204 00:54:29,040 --> 00:54:32,239 Speaker 4: that matters. The problem is that the way that the 1205 00:54:32,280 --> 00:54:34,799 Speaker 4: media and social media present things is they find the 1206 00:54:34,800 --> 00:54:37,880 Speaker 4: worst examples. So we'll talk way more about QAnon than 1207 00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:40,279 Speaker 4: we will about a community group that's like you know, 1208 00:54:40,520 --> 00:54:43,200 Speaker 4: give you know, running a soup kitchen or like cleaning 1209 00:54:43,280 --> 00:54:45,760 Speaker 4: up the neighborhood. Right, that stuff doesn't make the news. 1210 00:54:45,760 --> 00:54:49,120 Speaker 4: It's not that interesting. There's no podcasts on it. It's 1211 00:54:49,120 --> 00:54:52,000 Speaker 4: funner to talk about these groups that are really pathological, 1212 00:54:52,040 --> 00:54:54,120 Speaker 4: and we can't stop it because it is important to 1213 00:54:54,160 --> 00:54:54,759 Speaker 4: understand them. 1214 00:54:55,239 --> 00:54:56,640 Speaker 3: But it's just also more interesting. 1215 00:54:56,680 --> 00:54:58,440 Speaker 4: It's the same reason there's like, I mean, I love 1216 00:54:58,480 --> 00:55:02,800 Speaker 4: these movies like like Seria, serial killer movies like Dahmer 1217 00:55:02,840 --> 00:55:05,960 Speaker 4: and stuff. Will endlessly be talking about Jeffrey Dahmer and 1218 00:55:06,040 --> 00:55:08,239 Speaker 4: serial killers even though they're incredibly rare. 1219 00:55:08,320 --> 00:55:09,760 Speaker 3: The vast majority of people would. 1220 00:55:09,520 --> 00:55:12,640 Speaker 4: Never couldn't do that even if they wanted to. And 1221 00:55:12,719 --> 00:55:14,840 Speaker 4: so that's one of the things I have to understand. 1222 00:55:14,880 --> 00:55:17,080 Speaker 4: Individuals like serial killers are rare, and it doesn't mean 1223 00:55:17,200 --> 00:55:20,120 Speaker 4: people are intrinsically evil, And groups, even though they can 1224 00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:23,200 Speaker 4: be like Quanon or cults, can do evil things too, 1225 00:55:23,239 --> 00:55:23,680 Speaker 4: even though. 1226 00:55:23,560 --> 00:55:24,880 Speaker 3: They're not intrinsically evil. 1227 00:55:25,080 --> 00:55:27,600 Speaker 4: So it's just the same logic you apply to individuals, 1228 00:55:27,800 --> 00:55:30,279 Speaker 4: you should apply to groups and understand, you know, I 1229 00:55:30,360 --> 00:55:32,839 Speaker 4: go to like you is Clara a big sports fan. 1230 00:55:33,200 --> 00:55:35,600 Speaker 4: You know, I took my stepdad for his birthday to 1231 00:55:35,800 --> 00:55:38,319 Speaker 4: a hockey game and it's like twenty thousand people with 1232 00:55:38,360 --> 00:55:41,680 Speaker 4: their arch rivals. People are yelling, they're all in their uniforms, 1233 00:55:41,760 --> 00:55:44,760 Speaker 4: some people of face paint, but like not a single 1234 00:55:45,239 --> 00:55:47,960 Speaker 4: semblance of violence, like light. I'm surrounded by people with 1235 00:55:48,040 --> 00:55:49,759 Speaker 4: jerseys from the other teams and they were in a 1236 00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:52,200 Speaker 4: bigger pool of people from the home team, and no 1237 00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:55,960 Speaker 4: one harassed anybody. They give them some light ribbing and stuff. Right, 1238 00:55:55,960 --> 00:55:59,160 Speaker 4: But this happens every day, all day, NonStop, with huge 1239 00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:02,840 Speaker 4: crowds with our tribals playing each other, and it almost 1240 00:56:02,960 --> 00:56:06,399 Speaker 4: never ever spills over to anything bad or violent, even 1241 00:56:06,440 --> 00:56:08,399 Speaker 4: though you think, well, our nature is to be group. 1242 00:56:08,480 --> 00:56:10,560 Speaker 4: Is you put fifty thousand people in a stadium, get 1243 00:56:10,560 --> 00:56:12,279 Speaker 4: them all riled up, get them wearing the same thing 1244 00:56:12,320 --> 00:56:12,840 Speaker 4: and chanting. 1245 00:56:13,200 --> 00:56:16,319 Speaker 3: It's not going to be good, but almost always as good. 1246 00:56:16,680 --> 00:56:18,440 Speaker 3: And so it's the reason is because we have. 1247 00:56:18,440 --> 00:56:20,400 Speaker 4: Norms and expectations about what it means to be a 1248 00:56:20,400 --> 00:56:23,240 Speaker 4: sports fan, that certain things are allowed like light, redving 1249 00:56:23,280 --> 00:56:26,719 Speaker 4: and teasing, but not to cross the line. And so 1250 00:56:26,760 --> 00:56:28,480 Speaker 4: I think that you can do that with any group, 1251 00:56:28,640 --> 00:56:31,520 Speaker 4: that we can scale that to huge groups, we can 1252 00:56:31,520 --> 00:56:33,719 Speaker 4: scale it to countries, a. 1253 00:56:33,719 --> 00:56:34,520 Speaker 3: Lot of countries. 1254 00:56:34,600 --> 00:56:36,560 Speaker 4: We can think national borders would lead to more war, 1255 00:56:36,640 --> 00:56:39,279 Speaker 4: but there's actually been way less people dying for war 1256 00:56:39,360 --> 00:56:40,600 Speaker 4: than there were one hundred years ago. 1257 00:56:40,880 --> 00:56:42,040 Speaker 3: In fact, for now, part of. 1258 00:56:42,000 --> 00:56:44,919 Speaker 4: Like this the most peaceful last fifty years in human 1259 00:56:44,960 --> 00:56:47,239 Speaker 4: history in terms of group warfare. And so we've gotten 1260 00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:50,080 Speaker 4: better and better by creating healthier norms and institutions. So 1261 00:56:50,600 --> 00:56:52,640 Speaker 4: that's why I think like the lesson from all this 1262 00:56:52,840 --> 00:56:57,040 Speaker 4: is that we have this disposition is evolutionary, evolutionarily very 1263 00:56:57,040 --> 00:56:59,640 Speaker 4: old brain with this potential, but we can harness it 1264 00:56:59,680 --> 00:57:02,359 Speaker 4: in way is that like do these amazing things, or 1265 00:57:02,360 --> 00:57:05,360 Speaker 4: we can let evil people harness in ways that cause conflicts. 1266 00:57:05,400 --> 00:57:07,480 Speaker 4: I think it's like for us not to be manipulated 1267 00:57:07,520 --> 00:57:09,239 Speaker 4: by the evil people and then the burdens on us 1268 00:57:09,239 --> 00:57:10,560 Speaker 4: for to create healthy groups. 1269 00:57:10,680 --> 00:57:12,600 Speaker 3: And that means like even if it's like a study 1270 00:57:12,600 --> 00:57:13,520 Speaker 3: group or a work group. 1271 00:57:13,680 --> 00:57:15,799 Speaker 4: You know, there's lots I've been the person like at 1272 00:57:15,800 --> 00:57:17,760 Speaker 4: midnight the night before trying to finish the group project 1273 00:57:17,800 --> 00:57:19,840 Speaker 4: because no one showed up at my house or carried 1274 00:57:19,840 --> 00:57:21,640 Speaker 4: their role. And so it's like ever since then I've 1275 00:57:21,640 --> 00:57:23,720 Speaker 4: been always thinking, Okay, well, how can we assign the 1276 00:57:23,800 --> 00:57:24,880 Speaker 4: tasks more fairly? 1277 00:57:25,120 --> 00:57:27,600 Speaker 3: How can we set a schedule? And now I've got 1278 00:57:27,600 --> 00:57:30,240 Speaker 3: that that's like an art I can run. I do 1279 00:57:30,280 --> 00:57:31,480 Speaker 3: group projects all day long. 1280 00:57:31,360 --> 00:57:35,120 Speaker 4: With my research team and it's like smooth and fun 1281 00:57:35,200 --> 00:57:37,880 Speaker 4: and easy and almost no conflict. But it took many 1282 00:57:37,960 --> 00:57:39,920 Speaker 4: years of figuring out how to master it. And I 1283 00:57:39,960 --> 00:57:41,960 Speaker 4: think that's the thing about groups. It's like a skill. 1284 00:57:42,080 --> 00:57:44,480 Speaker 4: Managing a group is a skill, and you can do 1285 00:57:44,520 --> 00:57:46,120 Speaker 4: it well or you can leave it to the people 1286 00:57:46,120 --> 00:57:49,040 Speaker 4: who were going to do it not well. Those will 1287 00:57:49,040 --> 00:57:53,600 Speaker 4: be your narcissists in your psychopaths and your Machiavellian type people, 1288 00:57:54,040 --> 00:57:55,480 Speaker 4: and then they're always going to be there. They're going 1289 00:57:55,560 --> 00:57:57,960 Speaker 4: to try to get power and run groups and organizations 1290 00:57:58,000 --> 00:57:59,640 Speaker 4: and we have to kind of like stand up against 1291 00:57:59,680 --> 00:58:01,919 Speaker 4: them and let them be the only people who have 1292 00:58:02,120 --> 00:58:04,160 Speaker 4: that that power and that that voice. 1293 00:58:04,520 --> 00:58:06,800 Speaker 2: Right, So what I'm hearing is that we need to 1294 00:58:06,800 --> 00:58:10,040 Speaker 2: start another podcast that just talks about good groups. Good 1295 00:58:10,080 --> 00:58:13,080 Speaker 2: group be really boring podcast. 1296 00:58:13,120 --> 00:58:15,120 Speaker 4: What would be what would be the opposite of a cult? 1297 00:58:15,160 --> 00:58:17,360 Speaker 4: So think of it, like, what is a group that's 1298 00:58:17,360 --> 00:58:18,160 Speaker 4: the opposite of cult? 1299 00:58:18,200 --> 00:58:18,640 Speaker 3: In your mind. 1300 00:58:18,720 --> 00:58:22,200 Speaker 1: A community, A chess club, yeah, a little community, the 1301 00:58:22,320 --> 00:58:25,080 Speaker 1: people who like swim every morning or something. Just you know, 1302 00:58:25,520 --> 00:58:27,360 Speaker 1: it's not your whole life, but it gives you a 1303 00:58:27,400 --> 00:58:30,000 Speaker 1: sense of belongingnes and meaning. 1304 00:58:30,000 --> 00:58:32,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean opposite of a cult. Every group has 1305 00:58:32,680 --> 00:58:33,840 Speaker 2: the potential to be cool. 1306 00:58:34,960 --> 00:58:35,959 Speaker 1: But in. 1307 00:58:37,680 --> 00:58:45,520 Speaker 2: And morning swim group club, No, I mean there are many, and. 1308 00:58:45,440 --> 00:58:48,480 Speaker 4: They're all surrounding us, Like people who love book clubs 1309 00:58:48,600 --> 00:58:50,720 Speaker 4: and I have a writer's group. We have all these 1310 00:58:50,760 --> 00:58:52,560 Speaker 4: little things that like we don't think of but are 1311 00:58:52,600 --> 00:58:54,520 Speaker 4: really like the air we breathe, because that's actually what 1312 00:58:54,560 --> 00:58:56,000 Speaker 4: we do most of the day, is like moving and 1313 00:58:56,000 --> 00:58:58,000 Speaker 4: out of like actually probably pretty healthy groups. 1314 00:58:58,240 --> 00:59:01,760 Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, well this has been so enlightening and I 1315 00:59:01,800 --> 00:59:06,080 Speaker 2: feel like a little shred of hope about humanity from 1316 00:59:06,120 --> 00:59:09,800 Speaker 2: this conversation. So thank you for that. Do you want 1317 00:59:09,800 --> 00:59:11,960 Speaker 2: to tell people what your book is and where they 1318 00:59:11,960 --> 00:59:13,320 Speaker 2: can find you and your work? 1319 00:59:13,480 --> 00:59:16,320 Speaker 3: Yeah? Great. So my name is Jay van Babel. 1320 00:59:16,520 --> 00:59:19,600 Speaker 4: My book is called The Power of Us and it 1321 00:59:19,640 --> 00:59:22,520 Speaker 4: was written with Dominic Packer, and we have a website 1322 00:59:22,560 --> 00:59:24,960 Speaker 4: called Power off Us dot online where you can look 1323 00:59:25,000 --> 00:59:27,040 Speaker 4: at summary of the book. We also have a free 1324 00:59:27,040 --> 00:59:29,320 Speaker 4: newsletter that comes out weekly where we talk about all 1325 00:59:29,400 --> 00:59:32,560 Speaker 4: kinds of stuff like this, cults and groups and organizations 1326 00:59:32,560 --> 00:59:36,240 Speaker 4: and politics, and we also try to make it all 1327 00:59:36,280 --> 00:59:39,040 Speaker 4: based on science and evidence. That's kind of also kind of, 1328 00:59:39,080 --> 00:59:40,880 Speaker 4: in my view, the opposite of a cult, which is 1329 00:59:40,880 --> 00:59:43,240 Speaker 4: all mythology and narrative and manipulation. 1330 00:59:44,120 --> 00:59:46,320 Speaker 3: We try to make people smarter about groups. 1331 00:59:46,320 --> 00:59:48,000 Speaker 4: So if you want to get smarter about groups, if 1332 00:59:48,040 --> 00:59:51,160 Speaker 4: you please buy the book or join the newsletter and 1333 00:59:52,200 --> 00:59:53,560 Speaker 4: hopefully help you on that pathway. 1334 00:59:53,720 --> 00:59:55,880 Speaker 2: I love it. Thank you so much for joining us. 1335 00:59:56,120 --> 00:59:57,680 Speaker 3: Thank you, thanks for having me. This is a lot 1336 00:59:57,680 --> 00:59:59,600 Speaker 3: of fun. I love to talk about this stuff. Yeah. 1337 01:00:00,360 --> 01:00:01,960 Speaker 1: Oh my god, he's so cool like me. 1338 01:00:02,280 --> 01:00:03,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, you're the coolest. 1339 01:00:05,200 --> 01:00:08,320 Speaker 1: Okay. So is there any group that you hate so 1340 01:00:08,480 --> 01:00:11,880 Speaker 1: much that you end up identifying with the opposite thing, 1341 01:00:12,000 --> 01:00:15,760 Speaker 1: even though you're not completely sold on their message. 1342 01:00:16,440 --> 01:00:18,400 Speaker 2: That I hate so much. I don't know if I 1343 01:00:18,400 --> 01:00:21,160 Speaker 2: would use the word hate, but I think that, like 1344 01:00:21,560 --> 01:00:24,760 Speaker 2: I do, I definitely notice that when I'm talking to 1345 01:00:25,120 --> 01:00:30,680 Speaker 2: a man and he is really drawn to a particular 1346 01:00:30,720 --> 01:00:33,000 Speaker 2: set of figures who we've talked about a little bit 1347 01:00:33,040 --> 01:00:35,320 Speaker 2: on here, like people in the intellectual dark web or whatever, 1348 01:00:35,400 --> 01:00:38,560 Speaker 2: Like if he really likes Ben Shapiro or really likes 1349 01:00:38,680 --> 01:00:41,240 Speaker 2: you know, Dave Ruben or Jordan Peterson. I have an 1350 01:00:41,360 --> 01:00:44,480 Speaker 2: instant aversion to it, and it makes me I find 1351 01:00:44,480 --> 01:00:47,280 Speaker 2: myself casting judgments on him and then wanting to go 1352 01:00:47,520 --> 01:00:50,800 Speaker 2: to the other side of and like I've like literally 1353 01:00:50,960 --> 01:00:52,880 Speaker 2: like found myself being like, oh my god, I have 1354 01:00:52,960 --> 01:00:55,280 Speaker 2: to find the community of people who hate these guys, 1355 01:00:55,640 --> 01:00:59,640 Speaker 2: which of course is not correct. I mean, I recognize that, 1356 01:01:00,080 --> 01:01:02,400 Speaker 2: and I have and I have like made efforts to 1357 01:01:02,520 --> 01:01:06,360 Speaker 2: like actually try to see what it is that is 1358 01:01:06,400 --> 01:01:08,600 Speaker 2: in their messaging that's resonating with people, because I think 1359 01:01:08,640 --> 01:01:11,640 Speaker 2: that's really important because obviously it's so many, it's like 1360 01:01:11,720 --> 01:01:14,160 Speaker 2: millions of people who love these guys. There's something about 1361 01:01:14,200 --> 01:01:16,560 Speaker 2: them that's like appealing to people, and I want to 1362 01:01:16,600 --> 01:01:19,040 Speaker 2: see what that is. But my first instinct that I'm 1363 01:01:19,080 --> 01:01:21,120 Speaker 2: fighting against is definitely like no. 1364 01:01:21,200 --> 01:01:24,800 Speaker 1: Bad you, reality show idea you and Ben Shapiro an 1365 01:01:24,800 --> 01:01:26,520 Speaker 1: Island go. 1366 01:01:28,160 --> 01:01:29,280 Speaker 2: And then what we fuck? 1367 01:01:29,520 --> 01:01:31,680 Speaker 6: Like no you fight and. 1368 01:01:31,640 --> 01:01:35,520 Speaker 1: Then you find peace. God maybe it's through fucking I. 1369 01:01:35,440 --> 01:01:40,560 Speaker 2: Don't know, no, uh. I mean, part of my version, 1370 01:01:40,600 --> 01:01:44,960 Speaker 2: I think comes from how much I see them railing 1371 01:01:45,080 --> 01:01:49,480 Speaker 2: against any progressive values. Like, so I see how much 1372 01:01:49,520 --> 01:01:52,400 Speaker 2: it's like their whole platform is based on like not 1373 01:01:52,600 --> 01:01:57,200 Speaker 2: wanting to have to use people's chosen pronouns or you know, 1374 01:01:57,680 --> 01:02:00,680 Speaker 2: a resistance to what they view as police of language, 1375 01:02:00,680 --> 01:02:03,200 Speaker 2: which I think can be true sometimes, but they do 1376 01:02:03,240 --> 01:02:05,120 Speaker 2: it so vehemently that it makes me feel like, oh, 1377 01:02:05,160 --> 01:02:07,960 Speaker 2: they hate me and my values, so I need to 1378 01:02:08,000 --> 01:02:08,800 Speaker 2: hate them back. 1379 01:02:09,080 --> 01:02:09,959 Speaker 1: And that's what he said. 1380 01:02:09,960 --> 01:02:11,240 Speaker 4: That is, but he's. 1381 01:02:12,840 --> 01:02:18,600 Speaker 1: The oh my god, wow, we fixed it. It's done, guys. 1382 01:02:19,360 --> 01:02:21,560 Speaker 2: Yeah. So I but that I think that is a 1383 01:02:21,600 --> 01:02:23,720 Speaker 2: really a big part of it. They're like trying to 1384 01:02:23,880 --> 01:02:26,160 Speaker 2: own libs and own libs and own libs and you know, 1385 01:02:26,200 --> 01:02:29,840 Speaker 2: and I'm like, well that's me. So it's like leave 1386 01:02:29,840 --> 01:02:30,840 Speaker 2: me alone then, guy. 1387 01:02:31,240 --> 01:02:34,640 Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, you get them served, You got served. 1388 01:02:35,520 --> 01:02:38,240 Speaker 2: I get it. But like I said, I don't I 1389 01:02:38,240 --> 01:02:40,440 Speaker 2: don't think people who listen to those guys, I don't 1390 01:02:40,440 --> 01:02:42,480 Speaker 2: think there's anything inherently wrong or bad about those people. 1391 01:02:42,560 --> 01:02:45,760 Speaker 2: I think that, like, I just personally have an aversion 1392 01:02:45,800 --> 01:02:48,840 Speaker 2: to those to that way of viewing the world. Yeah, 1393 01:02:48,880 --> 01:02:50,920 Speaker 2: and hopefully you can find common ground with all the 1394 01:02:51,000 --> 01:02:53,160 Speaker 2: three men who listen to this podcast who also like 1395 01:02:53,200 --> 01:02:53,680 Speaker 2: those guys. 1396 01:02:55,800 --> 01:02:58,160 Speaker 1: Yeah, give lit a little note in our end box. 1397 01:02:58,240 --> 01:03:00,800 Speaker 1: We are so glad y'all joined us this. We cannot 1398 01:03:00,880 --> 01:03:03,920 Speaker 1: wait to see you here again next week, and as always, 1399 01:03:03,960 --> 01:03:06,880 Speaker 1: remember to follow your gut, watch out for red flags, 1400 01:03:07,000 --> 01:03:10,560 Speaker 1: and never ever trust me. Bye bye you. 1401 01:03:14,280 --> 01:03:17,000 Speaker 2: Trust Me as produced by Kirsten Woodward, Gabby Rapp and 1402 01:03:17,040 --> 01:03:18,440 Speaker 2: Steve Delemator. 1403 01:03:18,000 --> 01:03:20,000 Speaker 1: With special thanks to Stacy Para and. 1404 01:03:19,960 --> 01:03:22,280 Speaker 2: Our theme song was composed by Holly amber Church. 1405 01:03:22,520 --> 01:03:25,400 Speaker 1: You can find us on Instagram at trust Me Podcast, 1406 01:03:25,560 --> 01:03:28,959 Speaker 1: Twitter at trust Me Cult Pod, or on TikTok at 1407 01:03:29,000 --> 01:03:30,640 Speaker 1: trust Me Cult Podcast. 1408 01:03:30,800 --> 01:03:34,200 Speaker 2: I'm Oola Lola on Instagram and Ola Lola on Twitter. 1409 01:03:33,880 --> 01:03:37,560 Speaker 1: And I am Megan Elizabeth eleven on Instagram and Babraham 1410 01:03:37,640 --> 01:03:38,680 Speaker 1: Hicks on Twitter. 1411 01:03:38,840 --> 01:03:41,160 Speaker 2: Remember to rate and review and spread the word.