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Speaker 1: I'm Rachel Zoe and I'm Roger Berman, and we are

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Speaker 1: very excited to be launching our very first podcast called

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Speaker 1: Works for Us. And I think the genesis of this

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Speaker 1: entire podcast is the fact that most people come up

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Speaker 1: to us and say, I cannot believe you guys are

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Speaker 1: still together? What works for you? How do you do it?

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Speaker 1: So we decided to put together some thoughts on what

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Speaker 1: works for us. It's a constant question of like, we'll

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Speaker 1: see people that we knew in college and they're like,

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Speaker 1: you're still together. We'll see people all be like, wow,

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Speaker 1: I knew you. That was I with Roger that yeah

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Speaker 1: I was. I was. And so we should give a

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Speaker 1: little bit of background about why it works for us. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: maybe the genesis story I would be interesting. Well would

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Speaker 1: we tell it differently or would we tell it the same?

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Speaker 1: My memory is not so good, but from what I remember,

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Speaker 1: one day I walked to work by the way, it's

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Speaker 1: such a shame that people can't see you right now

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Speaker 1: because your outfit is just really next level. I call

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Speaker 1: it COVID casual. Rachel, is that what it's called. Oh yeah,

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Speaker 1: it's a whole new thing. So moving right along. One

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Speaker 1: day I was a waiter, well, I was a waiter anyway.

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Speaker 1: But I was a waiter at a restaurant in Washington,

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Speaker 1: DC named Mona Lisa. And I showed up to work

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Speaker 1: with my good friend Michael Smith. He was walking me

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Speaker 1: to work actually, and looked at my right and to

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Speaker 1: my surprise that the hostess stand was not our regular hostess,

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Speaker 1: which she was cute, but there was this woman and

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Speaker 1: the beauty of which I had never seen. Pretty sure

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Speaker 1: I was a girl. What did I call you a woman? Oh?

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Speaker 1: It just makes me sound like I wasn't nineteen. Once

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Speaker 1: you're with me, baby, you became a woman. But anyway,

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Speaker 1: I saw that beautiful, striking, gorgeous nineteen year old and

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Speaker 1: I turned to my friend and said something that I

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Speaker 1: can't say on radio. Please don't, but last say I

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Speaker 1: wasn't interested in having a long conversation with her. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: so I think that's actually wow, that's the first takeaway

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Speaker 1: of our show, Rachel. Instant attraction. I always say to

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Speaker 1: people that are about to begin in relationship, like, oh,

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Speaker 1: you know, he's such a nice guy and we'd be

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Speaker 1: dating for so long, and yeah, I think we're gonna

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Speaker 1: get together. Like listen, babe, unless you cannot live without

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Speaker 1: that person, unless you cannot think about that person, unless

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Speaker 1: you die for that person. Trust me, you're not gonna

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Speaker 1: be with that person. It's not something you just wait

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Speaker 1: for it to hit you. It's like, I cannot live

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Speaker 1: without this person. My life will be over. Because you

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Speaker 1: need that, because, trust me, over thirty years, little chicks

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Speaker 1: in the armor. You know, little chicks in the armor

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Speaker 1: over thirty years, and you really need to have that

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Speaker 1: really strong, almost visceral feeling at first to weather the storm.

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Speaker 1: In my opinion, what about you, Rachel, where you as

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Speaker 1: instantly stricken by me? Nope, what I was working in

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Speaker 1: the very fancy part of the restaurant, if you recall,

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Speaker 1: and you were working in the casual part, and so

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Speaker 1: I remember the tracks, and I remember I remember seeing

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Speaker 1: you after work and you're hanging out with a group

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Speaker 1: of people, and I was like, he's cute. He's cute.

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Speaker 1: He's definitely cute, because you're much more handsome now than

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Speaker 1: you were that but you were cute. You looked like

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Speaker 1: you were fifteen. In hindsight, when I look at pictures,

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Speaker 1: you actually don't even seem that you were college age.

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Speaker 1: It's bizarre, actually, jailbait. You were twenty two and I

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Speaker 1: was nineteen. You were in grad school and I was

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Speaker 1: in undergrad at George Washington University. So this was all

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Speaker 1: in Washington, DC, the scene of quite a lot go colonials,

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Speaker 1: all of you care? What are colonials? Sweetie? That was

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Speaker 1: our school name. Rachel wasn't so into the school spare

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Speaker 1: part of the program. I didn't go to school for sports.

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Speaker 1: I went to school because it was in a city

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Speaker 1: that I was excited about, and it was at school

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Speaker 1: that seemed really fun and ended up being an amazing school.

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Speaker 1: And we were there for the Clinton inauguration, which was awesome.

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Speaker 1: But anyway, going back to so, I saw you and

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Speaker 1: I remember thinking you were really cute and I had

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Speaker 1: just gotten out of a relationship the day before I

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Speaker 1: started that job and said I was going to be

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Speaker 1: single for at least two years and find myself, figure

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Speaker 1: out who I was. And he's single, and instead you

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Speaker 1: found yourself inside of you. I wanted to be alone.

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Speaker 1: I didn't want to be dependent on anybody. I wanted

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Speaker 1: to not be in a relationship because I had gone

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Speaker 1: from relationship to relationship to relationship. I said, this is

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Speaker 1: it could it be on my own funny you should

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Speaker 1: say that because I was actually in a relationship during

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Speaker 1: this time where I met my future wife, and as

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Speaker 1: it turns out, she was also a wait Can I

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Speaker 1: meet you? I wasn't. She was also a waitress at

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Speaker 1: this meet So anyway, long story short is I ended

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Speaker 1: up meeting him. I ended up leaving to go home

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Speaker 1: to see my family. We became friends, and I came

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Speaker 1: back and the way I remember it, I went to

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Speaker 1: the harbor where the restaurant was to go visit you

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Speaker 1: when I got back from being with my family, and

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Speaker 1: I you across the harbor and we went running for

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Speaker 1: each other, like in a way that you see in

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Speaker 1: like Hallmark commercials, like running through a field, and we

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Speaker 1: literally I jumped into his arms and he hugged me

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Speaker 1: and spun me around for like what felt like fifteen

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Speaker 1: minutes but was probably thirty seconds. And I remember going,

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Speaker 1: it's not really how friends greet each other, is it?

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Speaker 1: And um, shortly thereafter, our friends said, let's all go out,

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Speaker 1: let's all meet for drinks. We went to meet for drinks.

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Speaker 1: Nobody showed up and the bartender said to us, you

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Speaker 1: guys make a great couple. And we both looked at

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Speaker 1: the bartender were like, we're not a couple. We're we're

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Speaker 1: not a couple. We're not a couple, we're just friends.

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Speaker 1: We're just meeting friends. Lo and behold, nobody showed up.

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Speaker 1: We closed the bar. We stayed up the entire night

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Speaker 1: on the floor of your gross apartment and drank really

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Speaker 1: cheap wine from seven eleven and bought a jug of

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Speaker 1: very inexpensive wine, jug wine, as you jug wind veryt

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Speaker 1: was a jug, not a bottle. We drank the whole thing.

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Speaker 1: We stayed up all night talking on the floor, and

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Speaker 1: you dropped me off the next day drop breakfast first,

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Speaker 1: we went to the French place, had breakfast. No I

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Speaker 1: was down whatever anyway, so we had breakfast that morning

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Speaker 1: after we stayed up all night, and then I dropped

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Speaker 1: you off, and you literally looked at me and you go,

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Speaker 1: what are you doing later? Do you want to hang out?

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Speaker 1: And I said yep, And you said, okay, I'll thank

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Speaker 1: you tonight. And I was like, and that was literally

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Speaker 1: actually it, And that was thirty years ago, correct literally,

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Speaker 1: And so I think from that point on, I'm pretty

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Speaker 1: sure we were together every minute of every day, like

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Speaker 1: you are in college when you have a when you're

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Speaker 1: in a relationship and you have that freedom, you're just

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Speaker 1: with them twenty four seven. I'm you know, we just

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Speaker 1: didn't leave each other's side. And then we moved to

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Speaker 1: New York City, and you know, the rest is a

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Speaker 1: long history. I think you said I love you first.

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Speaker 1: I don't think so. I'm pretty sure you did. I

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Speaker 1: think you did because you broke up with a girlfriend,

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Speaker 1: because I said, you have a girlfriend. I'm not doing

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Speaker 1: this pick one of us, right. I remember that I

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Speaker 1: slammed her door at that awful apartment, and I know

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Speaker 1: you said it's me or her, yeah, And I was

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Speaker 1: like you it was a pretty easy choice at the time.

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Speaker 1: But but I vaguely remember you saying it that I don't.

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Speaker 1: It's not important, but I'm pretty sure that you said

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Speaker 1: her first name. Do you establish you don't have a

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Speaker 1: good memory, right, I have a good memory of certain things,

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Speaker 1: like when you say I love you. Do you remember

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Speaker 1: when you really fell in love with me? When it

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Speaker 1: was when? Oh? So, as a story goes the way,

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Speaker 1: so Rachel and I were dating, and obviously there was

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Speaker 1: some lust involved there because, as I said, she was

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Speaker 1: quite beautiful. She still is and um and at the time,

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Speaker 1: I am crafty thirty years um. So at the time

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Speaker 1: we were I was I was again a waiter, but

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Speaker 1: in a different restaurant. At the point this was nowhere,

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Speaker 1: parents said, you were in the food service industry. Yes, yeah,

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Speaker 1: her parents like, I just got my MBA and I

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Speaker 1: was a waiter, so, you know, didn't really fit with

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Speaker 1: the plan. But yes, I was a waiter again at

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Speaker 1: a different restaurant. And after my shift, my lovely young

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Speaker 1: new girlfriend would, even if it was two in the

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Speaker 1: morning or whenever it was, she would shower, makeup on

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Speaker 1: blow dry her hair just to come and pick me

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Speaker 1: up at get fully dressed so that she would look

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Speaker 1: good for me. God bless her. But this was actually

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Speaker 1: a shift that I had during the day, and we

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Speaker 1: were in Georgetown, where he worked, and we walked out

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Speaker 1: of the restaurant and I ran into a couple of

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Speaker 1: friends of mine and started talking to them, and Rachel said, Hey,

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Speaker 1: do you want me to pull up the car? And

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Speaker 1: I said to her, I'm like, oh, that's so nice,

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Speaker 1: but it's a stick hift. And she turned to me

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Speaker 1: and I'll never forget the look in her eyes, and

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Speaker 1: she goes I drive stick and I was like, oh

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Speaker 1: my god, I love you. And the next thing I know,

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Speaker 1: she pulls up in my slamming three hundred ZX teatop

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Speaker 1: with a top down, driving that stick, and that was

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Speaker 1: it for me. I was like, Wow, she's hot and

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Speaker 1: she drives stick. You know, I'm a guy. I don't

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Speaker 1: really need that much more. So I built my whole

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Speaker 1: I built my whole world based on that. I think

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Speaker 1: I was just happy, to be honest. I don't think

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Speaker 1: there was like an actual like moment. It was actually

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Speaker 1: that for the first time in my life I had

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Speaker 1: gone out with like real a lot of like good

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Speaker 1: looking guys that just were really not great boyfriends and

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Speaker 1: not necessarily great people. And I think after a while

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Speaker 1: it was like one of those things where I couldn't

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Speaker 1: believe I was with someone that I was attracted to

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Speaker 1: and was a good person. And I think at some

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Speaker 1: point I was like, this is insane, Like he's kind

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Speaker 1: He's treating me with like kindness, and I know it's

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Speaker 1: not compelling and funny, but I actually it was like

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Speaker 1: very shocking to me that I could be with someone

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Speaker 1: that had an edge I found good looking and that

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Speaker 1: I could be one hundred percent my self with despite

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Speaker 1: the fact that my vanity would like I always wanted

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Speaker 1: to look good for him and put makeup when I

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Speaker 1: picked him up, and like whatever, and that I yelled

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Speaker 1: at my sister for letting her guard down so soon

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Speaker 1: in a relationship. But I think, you know, for me,

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Speaker 1: I just was. I was genuinely content in the fact

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Speaker 1: that I had someone that was kind and treated me

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Speaker 1: with respect and kindness. It was. It was actually a

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Speaker 1: very bizarre feeling. I think it's an important thing to

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Speaker 1: just bring out. First of all, anyone out there, you're

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Speaker 1: welcome to lower your standards to get your partner. Rachel

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Speaker 1: lowered her standards and there she you know, she was

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Speaker 1: stating incredibly good looking men, and she's like, you know,

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna go for like the not so good looking guy,

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Speaker 1: and low and behold, look what happened, And see you

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Speaker 1: grew into yourself really just like a fine wine. She

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Speaker 1: picked the right jockey, And here I am, I picked

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Speaker 1: the right jockey too. You always say picked the jockey

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Speaker 1: out the horse. There's no doubt you became better looking

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Speaker 1: with age, for sure. Well, thank you, sweetheart. Yeah. And

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Speaker 1: I also think the other important thing that you spoke about, Rachel,

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Speaker 1: is that you were able to be your important, true self.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I find that all the time. I

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Speaker 1: don't know about you, but don't you hate when you're

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Speaker 1: with a couple and the person is completely different when

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Speaker 1: we're there alone, and then they're completely different with that

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Speaker 1: couple and you're like, huh, they don't act that way

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Speaker 1: when they're with me. Well, what that means is that

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Speaker 1: they're they're changing their behavior for their spouse or their partner.

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Speaker 1: And you know, I just think being the unauthentic version

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Speaker 1: of yourself it's just too hard. It's too much effort

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Speaker 1: to be someone else and have your guard up with

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Speaker 1: someone that you're living with and spending your life with.

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Speaker 1: So if you're not comfortable disclosing your you know, basically

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Speaker 1: your issues to the other person and having them, no,

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Speaker 1: it's got to be you know, you're basically what are

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Speaker 1: you doing. You're hiding your issues. You're hiding the fact

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Speaker 1: that you're not perfect, right, So you don't have to

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Speaker 1: be perfect all the time with someone who loves you,

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Speaker 1: you know, And that's the real takeaway here. The first

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Speaker 1: thing I hear when people say, oh my god, you've

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Speaker 1: been together this long, isn't that so much work? And

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Speaker 1: the first thing I always say is, actually, no, it's

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Speaker 1: actually the easiest thing in my life. Life is work.

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Speaker 1: Everything else in life is work. Your relationship should actually

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Speaker 1: be the easiest thing in your life. It's not to

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Speaker 1: say you don't have ups and downs, and there aren't

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Speaker 1: moments where I want to, like, you know, slam him

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Speaker 1: with a frying pan like I do. But at the

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Speaker 1: same time, it's not something that I ever stress about.

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Speaker 1: And I think that I have seen more often than

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Speaker 1: not women mostly men too sometimes that I've seen, but

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Speaker 1: mostly my friends that are not themselves in their relationship.

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Speaker 1: And for me, that was the eye opening moment, like

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Speaker 1: I can let my guard down, I can be me.

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Speaker 1: I can actually not wear makeup and wake up in

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Speaker 1: the morning and he thinks I'm beautiful like this, you know,

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Speaker 1: and you meant it. You weren't like being nice, And

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Speaker 1: that's a thing, like it was. It doesn't matter how

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Speaker 1: I feel about myself, this is how he feels. And

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Speaker 1: I thought that was hugely important, and I think for

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Speaker 1: people listening, I think that's a huge thing that I

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Speaker 1: hear all the time. And what is very alarming to

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Speaker 1: me is when I hear my older friends who've been

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Speaker 1: with their husbands for many years, not just newly in

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Speaker 1: a relationship. They're like, oh, I have to do this.

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Speaker 1: I got to get in shape. I'm going to see

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Speaker 1: my husband dad. And I'm like, what, like, do that

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Speaker 1: for yourself. But that shouldn't be a marker in my opinion.

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Speaker 1: So we moved from DC. We both moved to New

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Speaker 1: York together, and as many the formula in New York,

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Speaker 1: I was in fashion and Roger was in finance. The

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Speaker 1: two f's both building our careers, working twenty hours a day,

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Speaker 1: seven days a week. I didn't see him for days.

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Speaker 1: I would just like see him at two in the morning.

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Speaker 1: He'd come home. I'd make him a bowl of cereal

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Speaker 1: and it was like ye had to leave it like

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Speaker 1: six or something. It was the craziest time. But I

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Speaker 1: think because we were young, we didn't care, like that's

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Speaker 1: just we kind of knew that's what we were doing.

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Speaker 1: But we had so much fun. We were kind of

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Speaker 1: living separate lives. Honestly. Yeah, I mean I remember very

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Speaker 1: distinctly that we actually moved from DC. Moved with one

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Speaker 1: of Rachel's good friends and her boyfriend was also an

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Speaker 1: invest and banker. So we got a one bedroom house,

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Speaker 1: had my brother in law, oh sorry, one bedroom apartment.

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Speaker 1: Had my brother in law come and put with those

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Speaker 1: pressure walls up and we made it a two bedroom apartment.

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Speaker 1: And what was funny is because his name was Charles,

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Speaker 1: who worked at bear Stearns. Charles and I would work

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Speaker 1: so much that we would like leave in the morning

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Speaker 1: and literally not come home ever. And Rachel and Emily

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Speaker 1: they worked normally, sort of normal hours, worked a lot,

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Speaker 1: but you know, they would come with seven like a

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Speaker 1: normal human beings, and we want to be home. So

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Speaker 1: they kind of like lived together. And then Charles and

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Speaker 1: I would like walk in at various times like two

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Speaker 1: three in the morning, be like hey, Charles, what's up,

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Speaker 1: And like we would live together and it was a

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Speaker 1: very it was very strange. But you know the thing

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Speaker 1: about being young and being in New York City, I mean,

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Speaker 1: I personally think it's the best place to be as

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Speaker 1: a young person sort of developing your career and your

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Speaker 1: instincts if you will be It's a very fast place,

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Speaker 1: and you really have to learn how to navigate very quickly,

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Speaker 1: and I think navigation skills are certainly, you know, super important.

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Speaker 1: But I mean, I honestly believe that, Rachel, and I

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Speaker 1: mean obviously, when my first few years of my career,

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Speaker 1: I was, you know, I was an anunce. I was

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Speaker 1: really working my ass off as a banker. And as

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Speaker 1: you get a little bit more up the food chain,

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Speaker 1: you could control your hours a little bit more, in

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Speaker 1: your life a little bit more. Rachel I used to

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Speaker 1: like to go out, you know, and we love this place.

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Speaker 1: There was like this one place called Mumba, which was

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Speaker 1: like the best place of all time, you know, it

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Speaker 1: was New York, Yeah, really was. It was also this

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Speaker 1: u there was actually before Mumba. It was really funny,

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Speaker 1: was it called yeah, Kafe Tobak good one Cafe Tobak.

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Speaker 1: So basically what people don't realize we're very old, but

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Speaker 1: when we view are very well. We moved to New

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Speaker 1: York City. There was bars and there were clubs. The

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Speaker 1: concept of a lounge had not even been created. And

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Speaker 1: actually New York City, Kafe Tobak was I think the

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Speaker 1: first lounge and then Spy Bar after that. Rachel I

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Speaker 1: were there the very like the precipice of lounge lounge culture.

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Speaker 1: I would argue it was by far and away the

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Speaker 1: best years in New York City. Apart from Studio fifty right.

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Speaker 1: Lounge culture is there's not loud music, there's music. It's

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Speaker 1: not a bar where you're all standing. You have a

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Speaker 1: table and chairs and you meet with friends and you

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Speaker 1: get drinks. So it's a sort of amalgamatio. But anyway,

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Speaker 1: this place moved, but I swear to god, Rachel and

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Speaker 1: I would meet there every night upstairs nine between nine

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Speaker 1: and ten o'clock. We'd have dinner upstairs. The food was great,

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Speaker 1: and then the lounge would start filling up with you

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Speaker 1: know everyone, Oh my god, everyone in the world, Dagger, Madonna, Bono. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: it was really quite I remember one night. Yeah, we

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Speaker 1: had Bono Madonna. They were all like sitting next to

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Speaker 1: us and Rachel and I we need the owner. We

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Speaker 1: were very you know, we sort of that was our

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Speaker 1: place and we stay. We literally every set that place

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Speaker 1: down every night, literally seven nights. We set the alarm

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Speaker 1: with him every night for probably six years. Tommy's yeah,

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Speaker 1: but I think because of that sort of like that

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Speaker 1: clubhouse for us, we actually met so many of the

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Speaker 1: people that are in our lives even today, and like

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Speaker 1: the cultural world, and you know, It's almost like Max's

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Speaker 1: Kansas City way back when. If anyone knows the world

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Speaker 1: days where I met and Meyer, That's where I met

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Speaker 1: Charlotte and Samantha Ronson. I mean, the list goes on. Yeah,

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Speaker 1: tons of people. So you'll notice a lot of old

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Speaker 1: school New York City people have an associated moomba. They

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Speaker 1: actually opened one out here in LA that didn't do

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Speaker 1: as well, and when it closed, I was like, Okay,

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Speaker 1: we can move to LA now the end of an era. Yeah. Actually,

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Speaker 1: I think the main reason why we had you know,

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Speaker 1: we had a great time in New York. We we

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Speaker 1: love New York. We moved eleven years, eleven years, we

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Speaker 1: lived in five apartments. We got married in New York

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Speaker 1: and we got on the Rainbow room at the top

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Speaker 1: top of Rockefeller Center. It was really extraordinary. It was magical, Sweetheart,

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Speaker 1: Well it was. And what's funny is, you know, the

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Speaker 1: wedding was kind of for my parents, to be honest,

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Speaker 1: they really wanted to do that, and Frog and I

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Speaker 1: would have just kind of probably stayed. I remember, really,

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Speaker 1: I remember being really busy and not we couldn't deal.

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Speaker 1: I didn't even have time to do like fittings for

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Speaker 1: my drest I pretty sure your mom picked out our flowers.

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Speaker 1: She did well. Preston Bailey did the flowers. But I

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Speaker 1: literally just said, I want drama, I want candelabras, I

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Speaker 1: want drama. My mother did the rest. And the only

365
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Speaker 1: thing I really cared about was the band, and they

366
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Speaker 1: had to play Grateful Dead, right, and we had. We

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Speaker 1: got the most amazing band that had a ton of

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Speaker 1: Grateful Dead cover tunes, and then we were able to

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Speaker 1: walk out to Peggy Oh. And then everybody went into

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Speaker 1: rehab shortly after our wedding and said they'd never drink again.

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Speaker 1: People like ended up in the elevators at like four

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Speaker 1: in the morning. So it was a great wedding. Yes,

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Speaker 1: there was a huge blizzard. It was February fifteenth, ninety eight.

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Speaker 1: Long story, short is we were living our best life.

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Speaker 1: We were making a ton of money. I was a

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Speaker 1: freelance stylist making a lot of money working in music.

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Speaker 1: Pop stars, the whole thing, Backstreet Boys, Britney Spears, Jessica Simpson,

378
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Speaker 1: Enrique Roger was crushing it. We got our dream apartment

379
00:18:49,680 --> 00:18:53,399
Speaker 1: that was aloft, and it was half the furniture in

380
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:56,160
Speaker 1: our house is actually from that blow. Actually actually sitting

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Speaker 1: on a couch now from there. And the truth is

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Speaker 1: we had no kids. We umped up and jumped on

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Speaker 1: planes where it needed. We had no responsibility other than

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Speaker 1: to ourselves living in New York City. And then you know,

385
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Speaker 1: I had a burning itch to come to LA. I

386
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Speaker 1: always did since I was sixteen and spent a summer

387
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Speaker 1: here and never forgot it. And Roger was like, never,

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Speaker 1: no way, I'm a New Yorker for life. And then

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Speaker 1: I think, you know, nine to eleven happened, and I think,

390
00:19:23,480 --> 00:19:28,040
Speaker 1: like so many other people, I think it obviously it

391
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Speaker 1: hit me hard, really hard. I think it hit people differently.

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Speaker 1: I think everybody obviously was traumatized in their own way.

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Speaker 1: But for me, I don't think I was ever the

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Speaker 1: same in New York. And I think having witnessed it

395
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Speaker 1: and having watching it from our terrace and being so

396
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Speaker 1: close to it and feeling just so much pain from it,

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Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure I really wasn't the same. I didn't

398
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Speaker 1: fly the same, I didn't feel safe anymore. I really

399
00:19:52,960 --> 00:19:54,639
Speaker 1: I really was messed up. And I think a lot

400
00:19:54,720 --> 00:19:56,320
Speaker 1: of our life was in LA. A lot of Rachel's

401
00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:57,919
Speaker 1: life was in LA. And she's like, wow, I have

402
00:19:57,960 --> 00:20:00,240
Speaker 1: to keep flying all the time, but just st that's

403
00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:01,879
Speaker 1: going to be a hard thing. I think it was

404
00:20:01,880 --> 00:20:03,800
Speaker 1: a culmination of two things. I think nine to eleven

405
00:20:03,840 --> 00:20:06,400
Speaker 1: really was the icing on the cake. But I think

406
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:08,200
Speaker 1: what was leading up to that, if I remember correctly,

407
00:20:08,280 --> 00:20:10,199
Speaker 1: and I want to say it was Giuliani at the time,

408
00:20:10,240 --> 00:20:12,439
Speaker 1: but you know, I remember sort of the the the

409
00:20:12,640 --> 00:20:17,160
Speaker 1: Disney the disney landedness of New York City. I mean,

410
00:20:17,359 --> 00:20:20,640
Speaker 1: New York City became super corporate, if I remember correctly,

411
00:20:20,880 --> 00:20:23,960
Speaker 1: you know, everything was you know, the gap and this

412
00:20:24,040 --> 00:20:26,119
Speaker 1: and that. It lost a lot of his eggs. Oh,

413
00:20:26,160 --> 00:20:29,120
Speaker 1: because we were living in the meat packer got very

414
00:20:29,160 --> 00:20:31,879
Speaker 1: commercial in our little like romantic nights at two in

415
00:20:31,920 --> 00:20:35,080
Speaker 1: the morning at pastie and like walking through the night

416
00:20:35,160 --> 00:20:37,720
Speaker 1: packing district when you literally walked up very commercial. I

417
00:20:37,760 --> 00:20:40,879
Speaker 1: mean there was meat on hangers everywhere. And then you know,

418
00:20:41,280 --> 00:20:43,760
Speaker 1: I would say, when we left New York City there

419
00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:48,040
Speaker 1: was you know, all the top retailers. It got, it

420
00:20:48,080 --> 00:20:51,320
Speaker 1: got more commercial in the hotel. There's no there lost

421
00:20:51,359 --> 00:20:53,720
Speaker 1: its flavor for us New York time. New York lost

422
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Speaker 1: a lot of its flavor in my in my opinion

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Speaker 1: at the time, And uh so I think those two

424
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Speaker 1: things really sort of gave us the desire to move

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Speaker 1: out west. I just thought, while we have no kids,

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00:21:03,320 --> 00:21:05,919
Speaker 1: we were sort of like my parents said something to

427
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:08,399
Speaker 1: me for so many years, and it's not that they

428
00:21:08,480 --> 00:21:10,440
Speaker 1: ever wanted me to move to California, but what they

429
00:21:10,480 --> 00:21:14,560
Speaker 1: did say, New York isn't going anywhere. And so I

430
00:21:14,680 --> 00:21:17,880
Speaker 1: knew it's sometimes someone has to say something so obvious

431
00:21:17,960 --> 00:21:20,639
Speaker 1: for you to sort of, you know, just change your

432
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:23,640
Speaker 1: mind about it. And I thought, Okay, we have no children,

433
00:21:23,840 --> 00:21:25,920
Speaker 1: we have our careers, we have each other. That's all

434
00:21:25,920 --> 00:21:29,720
Speaker 1: we're answering too, So you know, let's let's do this now.

435
00:21:30,119 --> 00:21:31,879
Speaker 1: And also at the time, we had just sold I

436
00:21:32,000 --> 00:21:34,240
Speaker 1: just sold my company at the time, and we had

437
00:21:34,240 --> 00:21:36,800
Speaker 1: the opportunity that we could move and do you remember

438
00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:40,160
Speaker 1: so so sort of a transitional event for my work.

439
00:21:40,600 --> 00:21:42,960
Speaker 1: I'd left banking and I'd start a company with partner

440
00:21:43,000 --> 00:21:44,760
Speaker 1: of mine and we just sold it. So we had

441
00:21:44,800 --> 00:21:46,240
Speaker 1: a little bit of money and sort of not a

442
00:21:46,280 --> 00:21:48,399
Speaker 1: lot of responsibilities, and we're like, okay, it's time to

443
00:21:48,440 --> 00:21:51,520
Speaker 1: move west. And then we came out here and I

444
00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:54,199
Speaker 1: thought he would come for a week and turn right

445
00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:56,560
Speaker 1: back around and go back to New York and be like,

446
00:21:56,600 --> 00:21:58,800
Speaker 1: you've lost your mind. I'm such a New Yorker and

447
00:21:58,840 --> 00:22:02,480
Speaker 1: I've never this is insane. And he came and I

448
00:22:02,520 --> 00:22:05,359
Speaker 1: swear in my life he was here for a week

449
00:22:06,000 --> 00:22:07,720
Speaker 1: and he was getting up at seven, he was doing

450
00:22:07,800 --> 00:22:11,240
Speaker 1: yoga and drinking green juice and he was done. And

451
00:22:11,320 --> 00:22:14,399
Speaker 1: he literally, he literally was like, that's it. I'm not

452
00:22:14,440 --> 00:22:16,679
Speaker 1: going back, and the rest is history. We've been here

453
00:22:16,760 --> 00:22:20,200
Speaker 1: nineteen years, so we fell in love with California. And

454
00:22:20,400 --> 00:22:21,920
Speaker 1: I don't know, it's weird. I feel like I've always

455
00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:23,800
Speaker 1: lived well. I think it's also lifestyle and the people,

456
00:22:23,840 --> 00:22:25,600
Speaker 1: and you know, people always make fun of the people here,

457
00:22:25,600 --> 00:22:27,080
Speaker 1: but ultimately, I think the people are a lot more

458
00:22:27,119 --> 00:22:29,520
Speaker 1: open there with ideas and they're they're a lot more accepting,

459
00:22:29,520 --> 00:22:32,720
Speaker 1: and I frankly don't need a ton of pomp and circumstance.

460
00:22:32,840 --> 00:22:35,359
Speaker 1: I'm a little bit more casual, I think. So it works.

461
00:22:35,480 --> 00:22:37,640
Speaker 1: It works well for us. I think with us it's

462
00:22:38,280 --> 00:22:40,400
Speaker 1: you know, obviously we are entrepreneurs, but I think when

463
00:22:40,400 --> 00:22:42,120
Speaker 1: you have someone that you love and you have someone

464
00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:44,640
Speaker 1: that is by your side and that part of your

465
00:22:44,680 --> 00:22:47,560
Speaker 1: world is sort of solid, it gives you the opportunity

466
00:22:47,720 --> 00:22:50,280
Speaker 1: to take risks in other ways. And you know, Rache

467
00:22:50,320 --> 00:22:52,320
Speaker 1: and I had moved out lay and she was, you know,

468
00:22:52,320 --> 00:22:54,600
Speaker 1: getting an aim for herself. And you know, I remember

469
00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:58,200
Speaker 1: distinctly when we were thinking about doing this reality show.

470
00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,200
Speaker 1: And by the way, reality shows at that time we're

471
00:23:00,240 --> 00:23:02,200
Speaker 1: not very established. The only one that really was on

472
00:23:02,359 --> 00:23:06,080
Speaker 1: was Real World and Newlyweds So and by the way,

473
00:23:06,160 --> 00:23:09,840
Speaker 1: Bravo was the art and entertainment network at the time,

474
00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:11,880
Speaker 1: and I had to inside the actors studio and all

475
00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:14,879
Speaker 1: those shows. So they're all great shows, and we were

476
00:23:14,880 --> 00:23:16,359
Speaker 1: sort of, oh, wow, we're going to be doing a

477
00:23:16,359 --> 00:23:21,120
Speaker 1: fashion commentary show. This is wonderful and um at the time,

478
00:23:21,160 --> 00:23:24,199
Speaker 1: I remember you saying, well, gee, honey, I don't know,

479
00:23:24,280 --> 00:23:27,280
Speaker 1: it's like reality. Should we do it? And I remember

480
00:23:27,320 --> 00:23:29,879
Speaker 1: looking at you ago we moved to La. Of course

481
00:23:29,920 --> 00:23:32,040
Speaker 1: we should be on in Hollywood. You know, of course

482
00:23:32,080 --> 00:23:34,480
Speaker 1: we should be on TV. We're in LA And no,

483
00:23:34,760 --> 00:23:37,000
Speaker 1: you at what you said to me is you have

484
00:23:37,160 --> 00:23:41,399
Speaker 1: nothing to lose because people are making false assumptions about

485
00:23:41,400 --> 00:23:43,760
Speaker 1: who they think you are. But that was that was

486
00:23:43,800 --> 00:23:45,960
Speaker 1: the deeper business meaning of for no, no, because I

487
00:23:46,000 --> 00:23:48,160
Speaker 1: was terrified and I said no way, no way, and

488
00:23:48,200 --> 00:23:51,040
Speaker 1: you said, you have nothing to lose because in the

489
00:23:51,040 --> 00:23:53,159
Speaker 1: optic of narrative, people will make up their own and

490
00:23:53,160 --> 00:23:55,399
Speaker 1: people were making up their own narrative about Rachel's so

491
00:23:55,400 --> 00:23:58,520
Speaker 1: I thought it was important. She was actually the most talented,

492
00:23:58,600 --> 00:24:03,359
Speaker 1: hardworking stylists out there, and and and the things that

493
00:24:03,400 --> 00:24:05,560
Speaker 1: we're saying about it were just untrue. So I and

494
00:24:05,600 --> 00:24:08,280
Speaker 1: I remember, actually the very the very first time our

495
00:24:08,320 --> 00:24:11,439
Speaker 1: show aired, the very first episode, I remember watching Twitter

496
00:24:11,480 --> 00:24:13,719
Speaker 1: feeds and every single one that was like, oh, I

497
00:24:13,760 --> 00:24:17,280
Speaker 1: wanted to hate this girl, but I kind of like her. Wow,

498
00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,359
Speaker 1: she may be harsh, but she's fierce and you and

499
00:24:20,400 --> 00:24:23,960
Speaker 1: I just saw a public opinion turning before my eyes.

500
00:24:24,400 --> 00:24:26,679
Speaker 1: But what I was saying my earlier point was that

501
00:24:27,200 --> 00:24:29,680
Speaker 1: I just think that the ability to take a risk

502
00:24:29,800 --> 00:24:31,679
Speaker 1: and the ability to not know what the future is

503
00:24:31,680 --> 00:24:34,880
Speaker 1: but to know that you'll be okay is uh. That's

504
00:24:34,920 --> 00:24:36,439
Speaker 1: also if you have a secure relationship. But I think

505
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:37,840
Speaker 1: that's why we were able to do the Rachel's Ole

506
00:24:37,840 --> 00:24:40,360
Speaker 1: project because frankly, we didn't care what other people thought

507
00:24:40,359 --> 00:24:42,320
Speaker 1: about us, because we only care what we thought about

508
00:24:42,320 --> 00:24:44,720
Speaker 1: each other. And I think that that's, uh, that's an

509
00:24:44,760 --> 00:24:47,240
Speaker 1: important part. That's actually what. That's actually what made me

510
00:24:47,320 --> 00:24:50,760
Speaker 1: do it, because I was terrified, and I remember Roger saying,

511
00:24:51,480 --> 00:24:55,080
Speaker 1: it's it's making you so sad that people are judging

512
00:24:55,119 --> 00:24:58,680
Speaker 1: you without knowing you. So at least if you are

513
00:24:58,720 --> 00:25:01,120
Speaker 1: who you are and you show them who you are,

514
00:25:01,760 --> 00:25:04,840
Speaker 1: they can hate you, but at least there's at least

515
00:25:04,840 --> 00:25:07,840
Speaker 1: they can at least they can form an accurate opinion

516
00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:12,240
Speaker 1: versus speculation. And at that point I just said, Okay,

517
00:25:12,320 --> 00:25:15,960
Speaker 1: let's do this. And well, I also think the fact

518
00:25:16,000 --> 00:25:17,560
Speaker 1: is that I had no idea what I was talking about,

519
00:25:17,600 --> 00:25:19,920
Speaker 1: because I do distinctly remember waking up and there was

520
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,280
Speaker 1: eighteen people in our house. I counted. Then I'm like,

521
00:25:22,320 --> 00:25:25,440
Speaker 1: wait a second, I thought, there's like a camera, there's

522
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:28,440
Speaker 1: eighteen people. There's like people eating like potato chips and

523
00:25:28,560 --> 00:25:32,200
Speaker 1: stacking nothing. And it was amazing, just like any other production.

524
00:25:32,320 --> 00:25:35,840
Speaker 1: Remember that hot guy that La used to I do remember, Yeah,

525
00:25:35,880 --> 00:25:38,840
Speaker 1: that was very funny when Rachel wouldn't do any chere. Yeah, yeah, Jeremiah,

526
00:25:38,840 --> 00:25:43,040
Speaker 1: we'd get Jeremiah. No, not Jeremiah, Jeremy, Jeremy Jeremy is it?

527
00:25:43,800 --> 00:25:47,800
Speaker 1: I can't remember. I think it was Jeremiah, not Jeremiah.

528
00:25:47,800 --> 00:25:50,240
Speaker 1: Bran different Jeremiah. But anyway, there was this hawk eye

529
00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:52,199
Speaker 1: that worked on the set and anytime I didn't want

530
00:25:52,240 --> 00:25:55,040
Speaker 1: to do something, they sent him into ask me and

531
00:25:55,160 --> 00:25:56,879
Speaker 1: I did it, and she and he flirted with her

532
00:25:56,920 --> 00:25:58,800
Speaker 1: and she did it. I was okay with that. A

533
00:25:58,840 --> 00:26:02,240
Speaker 1: cute boy will really go long way sometimes. But anyway,

534
00:26:02,520 --> 00:26:06,159
Speaker 1: from my perspective, anything that I was doing in my business,

535
00:26:06,160 --> 00:26:10,560
Speaker 1: like obviously any financial part of it, any real big decisions.

536
00:26:10,640 --> 00:26:12,840
Speaker 1: We sat and talked about everything like should I do

537
00:26:12,840 --> 00:26:14,240
Speaker 1: this to da da da da? What do you think?

538
00:26:15,040 --> 00:26:19,480
Speaker 1: Everything kind of real beyond my styling decisions we did.

539
00:26:20,160 --> 00:26:22,400
Speaker 1: We made those decisions as a couple because that's what

540
00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:25,560
Speaker 1: you do, right. But I think what was happening was

541
00:26:25,680 --> 00:26:31,840
Speaker 1: it was getting My business was growing and it started

542
00:26:31,880 --> 00:26:36,720
Speaker 1: to just be more than I can handle while still

543
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:42,159
Speaker 1: actually doing the job. And Roger was at like a

544
00:26:42,240 --> 00:26:47,440
Speaker 1: pivotal point in his career where he had recognition, media

545
00:26:47,480 --> 00:26:48,960
Speaker 1: and he was doing all these other things, and I

546
00:26:48,960 --> 00:26:52,800
Speaker 1: think ultimately he had the idea to create the Zoo

547
00:26:52,880 --> 00:26:57,560
Speaker 1: Report as a way to further connect with my audience

548
00:26:57,840 --> 00:27:01,880
Speaker 1: and my followers. And we launched the ZAR Report, and

549
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:06,240
Speaker 1: it was Roger, myself and Jessica Meno, one writer who

550
00:27:06,240 --> 00:27:10,159
Speaker 1: we still love, and I think that's when our saga

551
00:27:10,280 --> 00:27:13,600
Speaker 1: began as whatever we are. That said, it's all a

552
00:27:13,600 --> 00:27:16,320
Speaker 1: bit of a blur, So I'm quite certain Roger's going

553
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:18,480
Speaker 1: to have a different take on it. No, I think

554
00:27:18,480 --> 00:27:20,919
Speaker 1: the take is not that dissimilar. I think what I

555
00:27:20,920 --> 00:27:23,000
Speaker 1: think you were correct that it was a pivotal time

556
00:27:23,040 --> 00:27:26,200
Speaker 1: in my life. Um, what happened is the financial recession

557
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:30,280
Speaker 1: had happened. God, I don't know if anybody's two thousand right, Yeah,

558
00:27:30,320 --> 00:27:33,240
Speaker 1: anyone's bored by that. You it was two thousand and eight,

559
00:27:33,240 --> 00:27:35,680
Speaker 1: two thousand and nine in that range, I think. And

560
00:27:35,960 --> 00:27:38,720
Speaker 1: you know, frankly, I was here in LA and I

561
00:27:38,280 --> 00:27:40,240
Speaker 1: had had like one person in the office here, but

562
00:27:40,280 --> 00:27:43,040
Speaker 1: basically the business was based in New York, and to

563
00:27:43,080 --> 00:27:46,119
Speaker 1: be honest, I sort of I think missed, you know,

564
00:27:46,200 --> 00:27:49,600
Speaker 1: being a part of a company. I did. I was, Yeah,

565
00:27:50,000 --> 00:27:51,480
Speaker 1: I was part of a company, but it was sort

566
00:27:51,520 --> 00:27:53,920
Speaker 1: of based on the East Coast, and you know, there

567
00:27:54,000 --> 00:27:55,400
Speaker 1: was a time I was sort of going to try

568
00:27:55,400 --> 00:27:57,800
Speaker 1: and you know, look for something else to do. And

569
00:27:57,880 --> 00:27:59,959
Speaker 1: what I thought about was, hey, you know, what are

570
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:02,480
Speaker 1: my skills? You know, I'm a banker or whatever, and

571
00:28:02,520 --> 00:28:04,320
Speaker 1: I could, you know, I could work for you know,

572
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:07,879
Speaker 1: be a part of another company, or maybe start something else.

573
00:28:08,680 --> 00:28:11,240
Speaker 1: But at the time, Rachel was getting more and more popular,

574
00:28:11,920 --> 00:28:14,359
Speaker 1: and it just really annoyed me because I was you know,

575
00:28:14,400 --> 00:28:17,040
Speaker 1: at the time, you know, owned the Webby Awards, and

576
00:28:17,160 --> 00:28:19,000
Speaker 1: I was pretty into the Internet. And it just annoyed

577
00:28:19,040 --> 00:28:21,720
Speaker 1: me that Rachel had all these theoretical millions of fans

578
00:28:21,720 --> 00:28:24,359
Speaker 1: but had no way of even communicating with them. And

579
00:28:24,400 --> 00:28:26,800
Speaker 1: it just seems so strange not to have a website.

580
00:28:27,240 --> 00:28:29,639
Speaker 1: And then I just thought to myself, well, who's going

581
00:28:29,680 --> 00:28:32,840
Speaker 1: to do this website for her? Not me? Yeah, And

582
00:28:32,880 --> 00:28:35,280
Speaker 1: you know, if you really look at how at that point,

583
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:37,480
Speaker 1: at least the infrastructure in Hollywood was set up. You know,

584
00:28:37,520 --> 00:28:40,080
Speaker 1: you have agents, you have managers, but you don't have

585
00:28:40,120 --> 00:28:45,520
Speaker 1: someone that's like web developer strategist. And you know, I

586
00:28:45,560 --> 00:28:47,320
Speaker 1: frankly thought at that point I had a lot of

587
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:49,880
Speaker 1: experience and email, and I thought that emails were just

588
00:28:49,920 --> 00:28:51,760
Speaker 1: as good as a phone number at this point for

589
00:28:51,760 --> 00:28:54,080
Speaker 1: the next decade, and I said, hey, you don't want

590
00:28:54,080 --> 00:28:55,920
Speaker 1: to contact these people and be in touch with them,

591
00:28:55,920 --> 00:28:59,240
Speaker 1: and maybe one day even uh, you know, sell to

592
00:28:59,280 --> 00:29:01,640
Speaker 1: these people, we don't. But the truth is I was

593
00:29:01,760 --> 00:29:05,840
Speaker 1: so buried in the Rachel Zoe project and my styling

594
00:29:05,920 --> 00:29:09,080
Speaker 1: career and everything else that I was like, okay, great,

595
00:29:09,240 --> 00:29:12,440
Speaker 1: go run. Like it was. We launched the Zooe Report,

596
00:29:12,480 --> 00:29:14,000
Speaker 1: and I was obsessed with it, and I loved the

597
00:29:14,040 --> 00:29:15,760
Speaker 1: concept about it and I loved all of it. But

598
00:29:15,800 --> 00:29:21,160
Speaker 1: it really became Rogers like baby and project and like

599
00:29:21,360 --> 00:29:23,680
Speaker 1: full time. And then we grew and grew, and our

600
00:29:23,680 --> 00:29:25,400
Speaker 1: staff grew and our team grew, and we just kept

601
00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:28,040
Speaker 1: getting bigger and bigger. We're busting out of our offices,

602
00:29:28,120 --> 00:29:31,440
Speaker 1: and the zoo Report got so big, and you know,

603
00:29:31,480 --> 00:29:35,080
Speaker 1: it just became an incredible extension of the Rachel Zoe brand.

604
00:29:35,240 --> 00:29:39,240
Speaker 1: But all the while I was underwater with my actual

605
00:29:39,760 --> 00:29:43,360
Speaker 1: day jobs, so to sweek. So I think for me,

606
00:29:43,560 --> 00:29:46,400
Speaker 1: I'm very untrusting. You know, you hear a lot of

607
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:51,080
Speaker 1: things about partners that have catastrophes, and it's an age

608
00:29:51,080 --> 00:29:54,680
Speaker 1: old tale in business. But I think for me, there

609
00:29:54,880 --> 00:29:59,640
Speaker 1: was going from only working for myself then partnering with

610
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:04,400
Speaker 1: my husband was sort of like, okay, well, no learning curve.

611
00:30:04,520 --> 00:30:07,160
Speaker 1: The trust is there and we have the same intention

612
00:30:07,200 --> 00:30:10,280
Speaker 1: and you know, we are our agenda is the same,

613
00:30:10,320 --> 00:30:14,200
Speaker 1: to be successful and grow this incredible brand and company.

614
00:30:14,360 --> 00:30:17,000
Speaker 1: And you know, the dream obviously is that we leave

615
00:30:17,040 --> 00:30:19,520
Speaker 1: it to our kids someday and blah blah blah. So

616
00:30:19,880 --> 00:30:23,240
Speaker 1: but I distinctly remember thinking to myself, well, if I

617
00:30:23,320 --> 00:30:26,240
Speaker 1: joined someone else's company, I might have a few points.

618
00:30:26,640 --> 00:30:29,680
Speaker 1: But under California law, I owned fifty percent of this brand,

619
00:30:29,800 --> 00:30:33,160
Speaker 1: so let's make it a brand. I have always had

620
00:30:33,200 --> 00:30:37,600
Speaker 1: a very clear idea of where I sit in our

621
00:30:37,640 --> 00:30:42,640
Speaker 1: business and where my strengths are, and absolutely absolutely know

622
00:30:42,760 --> 00:30:46,479
Speaker 1: where my weaknesses are. I'm very clear on Roger's strength

623
00:30:46,760 --> 00:30:49,520
Speaker 1: and his weaknesses. He may not be as clear on

624
00:30:49,600 --> 00:30:52,680
Speaker 1: his weaknesses. Why don't you tell me, Rachel, No, No,

625
00:30:52,840 --> 00:30:55,680
Speaker 1: I'm not going to do that for our listeners. Would

626
00:30:55,680 --> 00:30:58,680
Speaker 1: love to hear all my weaknesses. That said, there are

627
00:30:58,840 --> 00:31:01,840
Speaker 1: absolute exceptions to that rule. You know. I would say

628
00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:05,200
Speaker 1: I know business really well based on instinct, based on

629
00:31:05,920 --> 00:31:08,840
Speaker 1: you know, a feeling for something. I can make a decision.

630
00:31:09,000 --> 00:31:11,720
Speaker 1: I can see something exciting when it's going to happen,

631
00:31:11,800 --> 00:31:13,520
Speaker 1: and I go based on what feels right and what

632
00:31:13,560 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 1: looks right, and then does a business make sense? Does

633
00:31:16,440 --> 00:31:18,960
Speaker 1: this path make sense? Right? I don't have that kind

634
00:31:18,960 --> 00:31:22,640
Speaker 1: of background. I don't have the finance background at all,

635
00:31:22,760 --> 00:31:25,000
Speaker 1: and I would never pretend to. And I think there

636
00:31:25,040 --> 00:31:28,280
Speaker 1: are those moments over the years where he crosses to

637
00:31:28,320 --> 00:31:30,840
Speaker 1: my side. I crossed to his side, for sure, And

638
00:31:30,880 --> 00:31:34,120
Speaker 1: I think actually Rachel's gotten much much more involved than

639
00:31:34,120 --> 00:31:36,680
Speaker 1: sort of quote unquote my side of their business because

640
00:31:37,040 --> 00:31:40,120
Speaker 1: I think interesting, Yeah, it is interesting. And I think

641
00:31:40,120 --> 00:31:43,120
Speaker 1: what people don't realize is, you know, business is creative, right.

642
00:31:43,680 --> 00:31:45,800
Speaker 1: If you just think you're going to create pretty things

643
00:31:45,800 --> 00:31:48,000
Speaker 1: and try and sell them, well, you're going to fail.

644
00:31:48,640 --> 00:31:52,880
Speaker 1: So I think all sort of creative endeavors you know

645
00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:55,240
Speaker 1: that have commerce attached to them have a good mix

646
00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:58,120
Speaker 1: of art and commerce, and I think the most successful

647
00:31:58,160 --> 00:32:00,840
Speaker 1: ones get it right that mix. I would agree. I think,

648
00:32:00,840 --> 00:32:03,200
Speaker 1: first of all, I think you're under selling yourself. I

649
00:32:03,200 --> 00:32:05,240
Speaker 1: think you are actually are a very good business person.

650
00:32:05,320 --> 00:32:08,040
Speaker 1: I think that your strength just come out in different ways.

651
00:32:08,400 --> 00:32:11,600
Speaker 1: And I think that actually the more you lean into

652
00:32:11,600 --> 00:32:13,960
Speaker 1: them and the more that you are confident them, I

653
00:32:13,960 --> 00:32:17,240
Speaker 1: think the better you'll be. Actually in shark tank, honey,

654
00:32:17,240 --> 00:32:19,400
Speaker 1: I really to be in shark tank. The best thing

655
00:32:19,400 --> 00:32:22,320
Speaker 1: about working for myself, well, bear in mind that I've

656
00:32:22,400 --> 00:32:25,200
Speaker 1: literally worked for myself since I was twenty five years old.

657
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:26,880
Speaker 1: I've been on my own. I have not had a

658
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:29,000
Speaker 1: boss since I was twenty five. I've had one boss

659
00:32:29,120 --> 00:32:31,960
Speaker 1: in my entire life. And I think with that, there

660
00:32:31,960 --> 00:32:33,800
Speaker 1: are a lot of wonderful things and there are a

661
00:32:33,800 --> 00:32:36,280
Speaker 1: lot of really challenging things about that. That said, I

662
00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:39,280
Speaker 1: wouldn't trade it for anything, and I would say the

663
00:32:39,320 --> 00:32:42,120
Speaker 1: best part of that has always been that I governed

664
00:32:42,120 --> 00:32:44,680
Speaker 1: my own life in every way. If I want to

665
00:32:44,680 --> 00:32:46,640
Speaker 1: be and have always been a workaholic, I can be.

666
00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:51,280
Speaker 1: And I would say that working with Roger and us

667
00:32:51,440 --> 00:32:54,960
Speaker 1: creating our life path together, it's funny. You see a

668
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:57,240
Speaker 1: lot of doctors that marry doctors, and you see lawyers

669
00:32:57,280 --> 00:33:00,480
Speaker 1: that marry lawyers, and it's funny because they get the

670
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:03,120
Speaker 1: insanity of each other. They get the life that they

671
00:33:03,120 --> 00:33:05,920
Speaker 1: have to live. And actors Mary producers, you know, you

672
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:09,560
Speaker 1: see Hollywood, Mary Hollywood. And I think in our case,

673
00:33:10,360 --> 00:33:13,520
Speaker 1: the fact that we do this together and there's no

674
00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:16,680
Speaker 1: learning curve and there's no like trying to explain my

675
00:33:16,800 --> 00:33:20,040
Speaker 1: day at the end of an exhausting day, and vice versa,

676
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:23,200
Speaker 1: I think that's the greatest thing we can also travel

677
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:25,560
Speaker 1: as a family. We don't have to separate and be

678
00:33:25,600 --> 00:33:29,720
Speaker 1: a part all the time. We you know, we make

679
00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:32,200
Speaker 1: those decisions together. So I would say that those are

680
00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:35,400
Speaker 1: the pros for me is that we can roll together always.

681
00:33:35,560 --> 00:33:38,440
Speaker 1: The worst thing about it is probably that we're always together. No,

682
00:33:38,640 --> 00:33:41,920
Speaker 1: just kidding, I would say the worst thing is no,

683
00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:43,840
Speaker 1: But I was going to say the worst thing about

684
00:33:43,880 --> 00:33:48,200
Speaker 1: it to me is that there is no fall person.

685
00:33:48,960 --> 00:33:51,760
Speaker 1: The one thing that I would say, the only negative

686
00:33:51,800 --> 00:33:55,520
Speaker 1: that I would say, since I've worked for myself long

687
00:33:55,560 --> 00:33:59,160
Speaker 1: before I had children, there is no one you answer to,

688
00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:01,920
Speaker 1: and there is no one to cover for you when

689
00:34:01,960 --> 00:34:06,520
Speaker 1: you are sick, when you are tired. No one can

690
00:34:06,560 --> 00:34:09,280
Speaker 1: show up on my behalf. It's my name on the door,

691
00:34:09,440 --> 00:34:12,840
Speaker 1: and there's just you know. I remember styling, and I

692
00:34:12,920 --> 00:34:15,560
Speaker 1: remember I would show up on set with the flu

693
00:34:15,960 --> 00:34:18,520
Speaker 1: because if I didn't get paid, there wasn't you know,

694
00:34:18,800 --> 00:34:21,760
Speaker 1: you can't not show up. That for me, I would

695
00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:25,560
Speaker 1: say has been the biggest challenge at times over the years.

696
00:34:25,600 --> 00:34:28,000
Speaker 1: And there there were no dayofs, and by the way,

697
00:34:28,160 --> 00:34:29,839
Speaker 1: there's still are no day offs. But I think we're

698
00:34:29,880 --> 00:34:32,080
Speaker 1: always on. But I think if I could make a point,

699
00:34:32,080 --> 00:34:33,960
Speaker 1: I mean, I think the main reason for trying to

700
00:34:34,000 --> 00:34:38,839
Speaker 1: create the Rachel Zoe brand is it's impossible for you

701
00:34:38,880 --> 00:34:42,040
Speaker 1: to continue at that pace and being the person I

702
00:34:42,040 --> 00:34:43,719
Speaker 1: think it's I think it's very hard, and I see

703
00:34:43,719 --> 00:34:45,279
Speaker 1: a lot of you know, I think a lot of

704
00:34:45,320 --> 00:34:48,360
Speaker 1: people are creating brands around their influence, but you know,

705
00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:51,360
Speaker 1: to just create money by being on a set or

706
00:34:51,560 --> 00:34:54,600
Speaker 1: doing a service. You know, at some point you can

707
00:34:54,680 --> 00:34:57,160
Speaker 1: only charge a certain a much per hour, and at

708
00:34:57,200 --> 00:34:58,879
Speaker 1: some point you can only you know, have a certain

709
00:34:58,920 --> 00:35:00,719
Speaker 1: amount hours in the day. So that's why I thought

710
00:35:00,719 --> 00:35:03,200
Speaker 1: it was very important for us to build your brand

711
00:35:03,200 --> 00:35:06,560
Speaker 1: equity in Rachel zo so that even if you weren't there,

712
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:09,759
Speaker 1: the name meant something and that and that's you know,

713
00:35:09,800 --> 00:35:11,920
Speaker 1: and that's the beginning of the process, of course. And

714
00:35:11,960 --> 00:35:13,560
Speaker 1: now that's why we're able to have our you know,

715
00:35:13,640 --> 00:35:17,680
Speaker 1: your brand on you know products, because the name means

716
00:35:17,719 --> 00:35:21,200
Speaker 1: something more than you than the actions you're doing physically,

717
00:35:21,480 --> 00:35:23,080
Speaker 1: you know, during that hour. And that's you know, that's

718
00:35:23,120 --> 00:35:25,239
Speaker 1: the evolution of any brand. But I actually mean in

719
00:35:25,280 --> 00:35:28,320
Speaker 1: the physical sense of even as a service as a stylist,

720
00:35:28,400 --> 00:35:31,040
Speaker 1: like I just mean, when you work for yourself and

721
00:35:31,120 --> 00:35:33,520
Speaker 1: there's nobody covering for you. I think that's an important

722
00:35:33,600 --> 00:35:36,000
Speaker 1: lesson for people to take away when you decide to

723
00:35:36,040 --> 00:35:38,680
Speaker 1: be your own boss. You can't call in well, listen,

724
00:35:38,719 --> 00:35:40,440
Speaker 1: if you have to make payroll, you're the one that

725
00:35:40,480 --> 00:35:42,279
Speaker 1: has to figure out the money may make payroll. There

726
00:35:42,360 --> 00:35:44,120
Speaker 1: is no one to call and say, hey, can you

727
00:35:44,160 --> 00:35:47,200
Speaker 1: figure this out for me? You are at the beginning

728
00:35:47,200 --> 00:35:49,760
Speaker 1: in the end, and that is a lot of responsibility.

729
00:35:49,800 --> 00:35:51,719
Speaker 1: I think one of the really, you know, I'm just

730
00:35:51,760 --> 00:35:53,920
Speaker 1: going to add to what you're saying. Um, I think yes.

731
00:35:54,080 --> 00:35:56,000
Speaker 1: The best part about us working together is the fact that,

732
00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:58,640
Speaker 1: you know, I find a lot of couples you grow apart.

733
00:35:58,760 --> 00:36:00,399
Speaker 1: You know they're working a lot, and if you really

734
00:36:00,400 --> 00:36:03,120
Speaker 1: think about it, they're spending one two hours a day

735
00:36:03,320 --> 00:36:05,400
Speaker 1: and it's too tired to deal, too tired to deal

736
00:36:05,440 --> 00:36:07,360
Speaker 1: with each other. So it's nice we get sort of

737
00:36:07,400 --> 00:36:10,600
Speaker 1: like all sorts of moments together and if we're not

738
00:36:10,719 --> 00:36:13,520
Speaker 1: in the mood to talk to each other, we just don't. Yeah,

739
00:36:13,520 --> 00:36:15,680
Speaker 1: I would agree, Like if I'm over you or you're

740
00:36:15,719 --> 00:36:17,319
Speaker 1: you just like go on the other side of the

741
00:36:17,320 --> 00:36:20,640
Speaker 1: house or you leave, and it's fine. I agree with

742
00:36:20,719 --> 00:36:24,239
Speaker 1: all your points Rachel about the pros and the cons

743
00:36:24,320 --> 00:36:27,600
Speaker 1: of owning a business. Obviously, the flexibility of your control

744
00:36:27,600 --> 00:36:29,799
Speaker 1: of your destiny and they like, you know, you can't

745
00:36:29,800 --> 00:36:31,719
Speaker 1: show up one day be fired, you know, which is

746
00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:34,160
Speaker 1: a nice feeling. I think one of the literally which

747
00:36:34,200 --> 00:36:36,359
Speaker 1: I didn't realize, the best part about it for for

748
00:36:36,400 --> 00:36:38,360
Speaker 1: me is actually the fact that I look back and

749
00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:41,279
Speaker 1: you know, we've had literally, over the years, you know,

750
00:36:41,480 --> 00:36:45,719
Speaker 1: hundreds of employees, and it's interesting because you're really providing

751
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:49,319
Speaker 1: like a paycheck and they have husbands and wives and

752
00:36:49,360 --> 00:36:51,399
Speaker 1: they go get a lease on a house or buy

753
00:36:51,400 --> 00:36:54,279
Speaker 1: a home or you know, and you really, I don't know,

754
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:57,239
Speaker 1: I feel a sense of real gratitude with the fact

755
00:36:57,239 --> 00:36:59,879
Speaker 1: that we are able to from you our brand name,

756
00:37:00,280 --> 00:37:03,239
Speaker 1: from what we've created, have other people be able to

757
00:37:03,280 --> 00:37:05,840
Speaker 1: have a livelihood from that. I think that's very fulfilling

758
00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:08,400
Speaker 1: for me. I also love that we created an extended

759
00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:11,200
Speaker 1: family and that a lot of the people that have

760
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:14,200
Speaker 1: come through our company and are still with us have

761
00:37:14,320 --> 00:37:16,839
Speaker 1: become an extended family to us but also to each other,

762
00:37:16,960 --> 00:37:19,520
Speaker 1: and they have lifelong friendships. Yeah, I think that's amazing

763
00:37:19,560 --> 00:37:22,239
Speaker 1: when people become best friends through our company. Yes, I

764
00:37:22,280 --> 00:37:24,040
Speaker 1: think that's wonderful. The only thing I will say is

765
00:37:24,120 --> 00:37:27,279
Speaker 1: I would say that, and I will leave on this note.

766
00:37:27,320 --> 00:37:29,600
Speaker 1: I think that I will leave this point is that

767
00:37:30,040 --> 00:37:32,080
Speaker 1: I think the best is when it's great, you get

768
00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:34,720
Speaker 1: to enjoy it with each other. But in the low points,

769
00:37:34,960 --> 00:37:37,920
Speaker 1: it's terrifying because it's because it's the two of us

770
00:37:38,239 --> 00:37:41,040
Speaker 1: and it stops at us. So if there's a scary moment,

771
00:37:41,120 --> 00:37:43,560
Speaker 1: it's scary together and there's no one really to catch

772
00:37:43,600 --> 00:37:46,080
Speaker 1: if we fall. Yeah, and that's something that I think

773
00:37:46,160 --> 00:37:49,439
Speaker 1: is important for people to know when they're going all

774
00:37:49,480 --> 00:37:52,400
Speaker 1: in and they're working together. I think it's a really

775
00:37:52,440 --> 00:37:56,239
Speaker 1: important point that they look at the biggest pros and

776
00:37:56,480 --> 00:37:58,919
Speaker 1: also you know the cons and the scary part. It's

777
00:37:58,920 --> 00:38:02,319
Speaker 1: not the best diversive action strategy, Yeah, definitely not. I

778
00:38:02,400 --> 00:38:06,279
Speaker 1: really stand by let each other be their best, let

779
00:38:06,360 --> 00:38:10,920
Speaker 1: empower each other to do what they do and don't

780
00:38:11,000 --> 00:38:14,520
Speaker 1: try and do their job, and vice versa. And obviously,

781
00:38:14,600 --> 00:38:17,319
Speaker 1: like I said earlier, there are exceptions to that rule,

782
00:38:18,040 --> 00:38:20,080
Speaker 1: but you've got to stay in your lane in order

783
00:38:20,120 --> 00:38:23,279
Speaker 1: to make it work, honestly. Yeah, And I would just add,

784
00:38:23,280 --> 00:38:25,320
Speaker 1: I think one of the respectful of each other. Yeah,

785
00:38:25,640 --> 00:38:27,399
Speaker 1: definitely stay in your lane. But I think it's even

786
00:38:27,440 --> 00:38:29,480
Speaker 1: beyond that rage. I think that what I find, especially

787
00:38:29,520 --> 00:38:31,239
Speaker 1: even married couples. I mean, I think there's a fair

788
00:38:31,239 --> 00:38:34,040
Speaker 1: amount of competition and an ego that goes on between spouses.

789
00:38:34,200 --> 00:38:38,160
Speaker 1: And I think ultimately, you know, you'll find, at least

790
00:38:38,200 --> 00:38:40,880
Speaker 1: aside from the wise crack here and there, you know,

791
00:38:40,960 --> 00:38:43,319
Speaker 1: for the most part, you know, I will go to

792
00:38:43,440 --> 00:38:46,040
Speaker 1: my death defending Rachel, defending the brand and defending what

793
00:38:46,080 --> 00:38:49,799
Speaker 1: we're doing. And I will, no matter what, never tear

794
00:38:49,840 --> 00:38:53,080
Speaker 1: you down. I will always, you know, put our brand,

795
00:38:53,160 --> 00:38:56,120
Speaker 1: put you up there as in a respectful manner. And

796
00:38:56,160 --> 00:38:58,160
Speaker 1: I think the same thing like you even start off

797
00:38:58,200 --> 00:39:01,520
Speaker 1: earlier saying you know that I, you know whatever, I

798
00:39:01,560 --> 00:39:03,480
Speaker 1: did this or I'm good at that. And I think

799
00:39:03,480 --> 00:39:06,720
Speaker 1: the idea is knowing and respecting what the other person

800
00:39:06,760 --> 00:39:09,880
Speaker 1: brings and don't tear them down because it's easy to

801
00:39:09,880 --> 00:39:11,520
Speaker 1: be like, oh that was me or that was whatever,

802
00:39:11,560 --> 00:39:13,080
Speaker 1: and you know, it's much it's easy for the ego,

803
00:39:13,560 --> 00:39:16,319
Speaker 1: but not having an ego or putting your ego in check.

804
00:39:16,360 --> 00:39:18,840
Speaker 1: I mean, that's especially for our relationship. Obviously, Rachel is

805
00:39:18,840 --> 00:39:22,240
Speaker 1: a certainly front and center for sure. I think maybe

806
00:39:22,400 --> 00:39:24,560
Speaker 1: twenty years now, people are realizing that, you know, I'm

807
00:39:24,560 --> 00:39:26,440
Speaker 1: sort of here and behind the scenes, which is it

808
00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:28,640
Speaker 1: couldn't care less. But the point is is you got

809
00:39:28,640 --> 00:39:30,279
Speaker 1: to really have no ego. It's for the greater good.

810
00:39:30,280 --> 00:39:31,640
Speaker 1: You know what. I don't care that people don't know

811
00:39:31,680 --> 00:39:33,880
Speaker 1: who I am as long as we are good. No,

812
00:39:34,040 --> 00:39:37,520
Speaker 1: And I would say that He's been that way from

813
00:39:38,080 --> 00:39:41,640
Speaker 1: the day we met and I started my business, because

814
00:39:41,719 --> 00:39:44,799
Speaker 1: even when I was styling and nobody knew my name,

815
00:39:45,280 --> 00:39:48,239
Speaker 1: but people, everyone, like his friends and guys that would meet,

816
00:39:48,280 --> 00:39:49,960
Speaker 1: they'd be like, how do you just let her like

817
00:39:50,560 --> 00:39:53,560
Speaker 1: go out with such and such celebrity or so and

818
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:57,160
Speaker 1: so model. He was like, a trust her. If they

819
00:39:57,160 --> 00:39:59,560
Speaker 1: can get her, they can have her. You know he did,

820
00:39:59,600 --> 00:40:02,040
Speaker 1: he said, because it was the best saying of all time.

821
00:40:02,239 --> 00:40:05,239
Speaker 1: It was. But the truth is is a it worked right,

822
00:40:05,360 --> 00:40:09,480
Speaker 1: b You know. I always say like behind many successful

823
00:40:09,560 --> 00:40:15,680
Speaker 1: women is a really really good man that's rooting for them.

824
00:40:16,200 --> 00:40:20,760
Speaker 1: And my dad always rooted for my mother. My dad

825
00:40:21,120 --> 00:40:24,120
Speaker 1: always rooted for me and my sister. And the thing

826
00:40:24,320 --> 00:40:28,640
Speaker 1: is Roger has always always always rooted for me. He's

827
00:40:28,680 --> 00:40:32,400
Speaker 1: never competed with me, he's never been jealous, he never

828
00:40:32,560 --> 00:40:35,799
Speaker 1: wanted anything but success and never did anything but lift

829
00:40:35,840 --> 00:40:38,520
Speaker 1: me up. And I think that that would probably be

830
00:40:38,920 --> 00:40:41,719
Speaker 1: the number one piece of advice to couples that are

831
00:40:41,760 --> 00:40:44,319
Speaker 1: starting out. Never compete with each other, because that's the

832
00:40:44,360 --> 00:40:53,239
Speaker 1: beginning of the end. In my opinion. This show is

833
00:40:53,280 --> 00:40:56,279
Speaker 1: brought to you by our show's new sponsor, Better Help

834
00:40:56,400 --> 00:41:00,000
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835
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837
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841
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846
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847
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848
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929
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Speaker 1: What I learned about myself when I became a mother.

930
00:46:22,080 --> 00:46:26,000
Speaker 1: I learned that I could never possibly love anything more

931
00:46:26,160 --> 00:46:29,680
Speaker 1: in my entire life than I love my children. You

932
00:46:29,760 --> 00:46:34,839
Speaker 1: just it's an unfathomable, indescribable, paralyzing love that took over

933
00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:38,080
Speaker 1: my entire being. For I would say at least a year,

934
00:46:38,160 --> 00:46:42,440
Speaker 1: I could not get my head out of the mommy

935
00:46:42,800 --> 00:46:46,360
Speaker 1: kind of world. I couldn't honestly figure out how to

936
00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:49,400
Speaker 1: get back into my life again. I did, but it

937
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:51,560
Speaker 1: took me a v Yeah. That wasn't the best year

938
00:46:51,600 --> 00:46:56,759
Speaker 1: we've had business wise. That was tough. Yeah, So I

939
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:59,680
Speaker 1: would say I really thought that I was going to

940
00:46:59,760 --> 00:47:03,400
Speaker 1: like have a baby and kind of like pass it

941
00:47:03,440 --> 00:47:06,280
Speaker 1: to my parents and like go to work and like whatever.

942
00:47:06,320 --> 00:47:08,279
Speaker 1: That was a little bit more of my mindset, which

943
00:47:08,320 --> 00:47:11,239
Speaker 1: is weird because I've always been obsessed with kids. I

944
00:47:11,280 --> 00:47:13,520
Speaker 1: think I was so immersed in my career that I

945
00:47:13,560 --> 00:47:16,120
Speaker 1: couldn't see pasted it and I couldn't wrap my head

946
00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:18,480
Speaker 1: around how I was going to like take a shower

947
00:47:18,480 --> 00:47:21,240
Speaker 1: and comb my hair and like go to an event

948
00:47:21,520 --> 00:47:24,160
Speaker 1: while having a child. I just couldn't wrap my head

949
00:47:24,200 --> 00:47:27,520
Speaker 1: around it. So I think what I learned was that

950
00:47:27,920 --> 00:47:31,239
Speaker 1: just the overwhelming, paralyzing love and how it turned me

951
00:47:31,320 --> 00:47:34,799
Speaker 1: completely inside out and upside down. I couldn't see past it.

952
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:37,160
Speaker 1: You know. He was very different this second time than

953
00:47:37,200 --> 00:47:39,640
Speaker 1: he was the first time. The first time he was

954
00:47:39,680 --> 00:47:42,040
Speaker 1: like all in, like I couldn't believe it. He was

955
00:47:42,040 --> 00:47:43,640
Speaker 1: like he wanted to like get up in the middle

956
00:47:43,640 --> 00:47:45,600
Speaker 1: of the night, which, by the way, he slept like

957
00:47:45,640 --> 00:47:48,400
Speaker 1: a very peaceful twelve hours for the eighteen years we

958
00:47:48,400 --> 00:47:50,960
Speaker 1: already gather before we had kids. Sleep was like his

959
00:47:51,200 --> 00:47:56,120
Speaker 1: entire universe. And he wanted to be like super Dad.

960
00:47:56,840 --> 00:47:58,840
Speaker 1: And he just jumped right in and was like, I

961
00:47:58,880 --> 00:48:00,799
Speaker 1: want to feed him, I want to I want to create.

962
00:48:00,880 --> 00:48:03,520
Speaker 1: You were so in and then Skyler kind of ignored

963
00:48:03,600 --> 00:48:09,200
Speaker 1: him for a bit, a bit meaning three years. So

964
00:48:09,239 --> 00:48:12,120
Speaker 1: then so then my so, now this is a perfect

965
00:48:12,120 --> 00:48:15,920
Speaker 1: segue for me to realize what I realized about kids. Well,

966
00:48:15,960 --> 00:48:18,279
Speaker 1: I love my children, and I was so happy to

967
00:48:18,280 --> 00:48:22,160
Speaker 1: have my children. Um, but what I realized my myself? Yeah, well,

968
00:48:22,200 --> 00:48:25,000
Speaker 1: of course I'm very I mean, I love my children.

969
00:48:25,120 --> 00:48:28,400
Speaker 1: But this is an honest show, Rachel, And no, no,

970
00:48:28,480 --> 00:48:30,160
Speaker 1: you said, what did you learn about yourself? I think

971
00:48:30,200 --> 00:48:33,360
Speaker 1: I learned I'm probably more selfish than I thought I

972
00:48:33,400 --> 00:48:35,160
Speaker 1: was Wait, I wasn't. I wasn't done with what I

973
00:48:35,200 --> 00:48:39,799
Speaker 1: learned about you. Oh I'm sorry. I learned that he,

974
00:48:39,920 --> 00:48:46,080
Speaker 1: in theory, wanted to be super hands on, full on dad.

975
00:48:47,080 --> 00:48:50,480
Speaker 1: But then the first chance he got to go on

976
00:48:50,480 --> 00:48:54,839
Speaker 1: a trip to Hong Kong, like a month later, it's like, bye, Yeah,

977
00:48:54,920 --> 00:48:57,640
Speaker 1: I realized that I see, unlike Rachel, where I like was,

978
00:48:58,000 --> 00:49:00,880
Speaker 1: I wasn't paralyzed and couldn't see past my kids. I

979
00:49:00,920 --> 00:49:03,520
Speaker 1: was like, okay, they I don't know. We've had a

980
00:49:03,560 --> 00:49:04,759
Speaker 1: kid for like two weeks. I could go out to

981
00:49:04,800 --> 00:49:08,799
Speaker 1: dinner now, and so I kind of I don't know.

982
00:49:08,840 --> 00:49:11,120
Speaker 1: I thought kids were a part of our life, not

983
00:49:11,400 --> 00:49:15,040
Speaker 1: the entire life, and Rachel kind of thought, or still does,

984
00:49:15,080 --> 00:49:16,879
Speaker 1: that they are the entire life. So I think we're

985
00:49:17,040 --> 00:49:19,080
Speaker 1: I think actually, I think Rachel's coming a little bit

986
00:49:19,120 --> 00:49:20,640
Speaker 1: more to my school and I'm coming a little bit

987
00:49:20,680 --> 00:49:22,200
Speaker 1: more to her school, and I think we're sort of

988
00:49:22,719 --> 00:49:25,960
Speaker 1: somewhat meeting in the middle. I think. So, I don't

989
00:49:25,960 --> 00:49:28,719
Speaker 1: think I'm coming with God, Well, I'm just going. I'm

990
00:49:28,760 --> 00:49:31,319
Speaker 1: just I'm just running further. I'm just ignoring. I'm just

991
00:49:31,360 --> 00:49:36,080
Speaker 1: ignoring my family. More and more works for me, Yeah, definitely. Yeah,

992
00:49:36,520 --> 00:49:38,919
Speaker 1: Roger's been missing lately. Well, what I learned about Rachel

993
00:49:38,920 --> 00:49:43,000
Speaker 1: when she became a mother is it really well? I

994
00:49:43,040 --> 00:49:45,919
Speaker 1: actually it reinforced what I actually thought. You know, I've

995
00:49:45,960 --> 00:49:47,600
Speaker 1: known Rachel for a long time, and she's always been

996
00:49:47,680 --> 00:49:51,359
Speaker 1: all in on whatever she does. She's a perfectionist and

997
00:49:51,440 --> 00:49:54,320
Speaker 1: she you know, it's very competitive in that manner, you know,

998
00:49:54,320 --> 00:49:57,680
Speaker 1: when she had a child, I think what's most surprised, Well,

999
00:49:57,719 --> 00:49:58,960
Speaker 1: I knew she was going to be a great mom,

1000
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:02,640
Speaker 1: but what most surprised me was her verve. I guess

1001
00:50:03,280 --> 00:50:05,960
Speaker 1: the fact that she really was hell bent on being

1002
00:50:06,040 --> 00:50:08,799
Speaker 1: the world's best mom, and not in a competition wise,

1003
00:50:08,800 --> 00:50:11,799
Speaker 1: but just she felt it that she just needed to be.

1004
00:50:12,440 --> 00:50:16,680
Speaker 1: And what I learned is it's super super easy to

1005
00:50:16,719 --> 00:50:21,120
Speaker 1: spend twenty years with someone and then be ignored. I

1006
00:50:21,239 --> 00:50:26,560
Speaker 1: learned that everything I've ever done in my life up

1007
00:50:26,560 --> 00:50:32,560
Speaker 1: to that pointment nothing. And I've learned that if I

1008
00:50:32,600 --> 00:50:35,799
Speaker 1: want to stay around in this house, I've got to

1009
00:50:35,840 --> 00:50:39,320
Speaker 1: learn to love those damn kids really really hard, because

1010
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:42,359
Speaker 1: if I don't love them as much as she loves them,

1011
00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:46,000
Speaker 1: then guess what I get into love? So I love

1012
00:50:46,040 --> 00:50:47,960
Speaker 1: my damn kids. I'm not sure I can to argue

1013
00:50:48,000 --> 00:50:51,560
Speaker 1: all of that. Actually, I'm not sure. Yeah, because if

1014
00:50:51,560 --> 00:50:53,399
Speaker 1: you're not in on the kids, then your wife, who's

1015
00:50:53,400 --> 00:50:54,719
Speaker 1: in on the kids, it's like, well you're not on

1016
00:50:54,760 --> 00:50:57,000
Speaker 1: the kids, and like then I don't really like you anymore.

1017
00:50:57,280 --> 00:50:59,319
Speaker 1: So you're like, Okay, well I'm totally in with the kids.

1018
00:50:59,320 --> 00:51:00,960
Speaker 1: She's like, well that's be and then I like you.

1019
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:03,000
Speaker 1: So you kind of got to be a family man

1020
00:51:03,080 --> 00:51:04,920
Speaker 1: to get the family part of the man. I just

1021
00:51:04,960 --> 00:51:08,880
Speaker 1: think we can't make it easier for the dad to

1022
00:51:09,120 --> 00:51:14,040
Speaker 1: like have kids be like an accessory, like like the

1023
00:51:14,160 --> 00:51:19,120
Speaker 1: side hustle. I think that too many of us because

1024
00:51:19,120 --> 00:51:25,520
Speaker 1: as women, we take the responsibility just organically to do

1025
00:51:26,200 --> 00:51:29,680
Speaker 1: it all and be the best mom because that's our job.

1026
00:51:29,840 --> 00:51:31,880
Speaker 1: And I don't do it because it's my job. I

1027
00:51:31,920 --> 00:51:34,000
Speaker 1: do it because I live for it. But I think

1028
00:51:34,120 --> 00:51:36,759
Speaker 1: at the same time, I think that there is a

1029
00:51:36,800 --> 00:51:45,000
Speaker 1: tendency to have that unspoken free pass yes where you know,

1030
00:51:45,400 --> 00:51:48,680
Speaker 1: you have your Sundays and you have your Monday nights,

1031
00:51:48,680 --> 00:51:51,919
Speaker 1: and you have your Saturday afternoons. According to my mother,

1032
00:51:52,239 --> 00:51:55,680
Speaker 1: who when I say I never remember a day without

1033
00:51:55,719 --> 00:52:00,600
Speaker 1: my dad, my mom claims he was traveling so much

1034
00:52:01,080 --> 00:52:03,719
Speaker 1: for business, he was barely home. He never changed the

1035
00:52:03,800 --> 00:52:05,680
Speaker 1: dayper he never did it that. I'm like, what do

1036
00:52:05,719 --> 00:52:09,040
Speaker 1: you mean. He's the most perfect human being. So I

1037
00:52:09,080 --> 00:52:14,080
Speaker 1: think that there is a tendency as women that we

1038
00:52:15,000 --> 00:52:18,080
Speaker 1: let you do that. And I think that I'm here

1039
00:52:18,120 --> 00:52:20,239
Speaker 1: to say you do what you do. I think we

1040
00:52:20,360 --> 00:52:22,960
Speaker 1: don't want to be the nagging wife that traps the husband.

1041
00:52:23,440 --> 00:52:26,560
Speaker 1: But I also think I think there is an expectation

1042
00:52:26,719 --> 00:52:31,280
Speaker 1: that we want the dads. And obviously this is huge generalizations.

1043
00:52:31,320 --> 00:52:34,719
Speaker 1: There are many exceptions, especially today, where the roles are

1044
00:52:34,840 --> 00:52:38,600
Speaker 1: very much reverse. But I think that as mothers, we

1045
00:52:38,800 --> 00:52:42,319
Speaker 1: want the dads to want to play that role, not

1046
00:52:42,400 --> 00:52:45,160
Speaker 1: too big to play that role. And I think that

1047
00:52:45,239 --> 00:52:46,719
Speaker 1: if you don't, you don't, and if you do, you do.

1048
00:52:46,880 --> 00:52:49,480
Speaker 1: I know you love our children. I think that's fine.

1049
00:52:49,520 --> 00:52:51,640
Speaker 1: I'm just not going to continue to make it easier

1050
00:52:51,719 --> 00:52:57,480
Speaker 1: for you to have leisurely afternoons. And this works for

1051
00:52:57,719 --> 00:52:59,879
Speaker 1: I'm not so sure it works for us. It works

1052
00:52:59,920 --> 00:53:02,239
Speaker 1: for you as the children are getting older now, and

1053
00:53:02,239 --> 00:53:05,239
Speaker 1: I'll be able to have you get your life back now.

1054
00:53:05,280 --> 00:53:07,920
Speaker 1: No like more deeper conversations with them, And it's just

1055
00:53:08,000 --> 00:53:10,480
Speaker 1: for me. I think as the kids get older and

1056
00:53:10,480 --> 00:53:14,520
Speaker 1: they sort of are functioning personalities, I'm sort of, um, really,

1057
00:53:15,120 --> 00:53:17,879
Speaker 1: I don't know, getting a much better relationship with them

1058
00:53:17,960 --> 00:53:19,520
Speaker 1: as opposed to when they're just like really you know,

1059
00:53:19,600 --> 00:53:21,719
Speaker 1: young kids and they really want their mommy. You know,

1060
00:53:21,760 --> 00:53:25,880
Speaker 1: it's it's hard to really feel that or you know, needed,

1061
00:53:26,000 --> 00:53:28,399
Speaker 1: or even you know whatever. I always say, I don't.

1062
00:53:28,560 --> 00:53:30,160
Speaker 1: I don't have my first memory tell them after for

1063
00:53:30,360 --> 00:53:32,760
Speaker 1: so as long as you keep them safe, you're fine.

1064
00:53:33,440 --> 00:53:36,239
Speaker 1: See and you and you completely misinterpreted your memories because

1065
00:53:36,239 --> 00:53:44,440
Speaker 1: you love your daddy. So there you go. In twenty years,

1066
00:53:44,600 --> 00:53:48,480
Speaker 1: I hope that we have grown our business, that we

1067
00:53:48,640 --> 00:53:52,440
Speaker 1: have a brand that continues to mean more and more

1068
00:53:52,560 --> 00:53:57,440
Speaker 1: to people, and that we are really enjoying our life

1069
00:53:58,040 --> 00:54:03,239
Speaker 1: with our grown kids. I desperately want grandchildren. Yeah, in

1070
00:54:03,239 --> 00:54:06,160
Speaker 1: twenty years, I'm hoping that one of our children, Skyler,

1071
00:54:06,239 --> 00:54:08,919
Speaker 1: he's really got to get on this young. You've got

1072
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:11,480
Speaker 1: to get on the kid thing really young. Meanwhile, I

1073
00:54:11,520 --> 00:54:14,279
Speaker 1: did the polar opposite, but still as a parent, I

1074
00:54:14,320 --> 00:54:16,960
Speaker 1: just already kind of put in him I need to

1075
00:54:17,000 --> 00:54:20,680
Speaker 1: be a grandma at a young age. Oh yeah, so

1076
00:54:20,680 --> 00:54:23,040
Speaker 1: I guess in shorting years, we're gonna be grandparents and

1077
00:54:23,480 --> 00:54:25,520
Speaker 1: just as boring as ever. I think will be just

1078
00:54:25,640 --> 00:54:30,040
Speaker 1: like my parents who are eighty three and seventy eight

1079
00:54:30,080 --> 00:54:32,719
Speaker 1: and go out, not in COVID, but go out seven

1080
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:36,720
Speaker 1: nights a week and continue to live a very full

1081
00:54:37,400 --> 00:54:41,520
Speaker 1: fun Yeah, I mean that's me. I'm always I cannot

1082
00:54:41,520 --> 00:54:43,880
Speaker 1: sit in the house. We want to like experience life

1083
00:54:43,960 --> 00:54:47,680
Speaker 1: and with our children and our families and build something

1084
00:54:47,719 --> 00:54:49,920
Speaker 1: that really means a lot to people and that it

1085
00:54:50,000 --> 00:54:53,720
Speaker 1: stays forever, because I think, well, yeah, that's my favorite

1086
00:54:53,719 --> 00:54:59,240
Speaker 1: thing to do. What makes us work? Honestly, it's actually

1087
00:54:59,360 --> 00:55:03,520
Speaker 1: very simple. Trust one thousand percent. I don't ever wonder

1088
00:55:03,560 --> 00:55:06,640
Speaker 1: where he is because I know they always know where

1089
00:55:06,640 --> 00:55:12,000
Speaker 1: he is. And honesty, and like I said, patience, a

1090
00:55:12,120 --> 00:55:14,719
Speaker 1: lot of patience and knowing one to walk away. I

1091
00:55:14,760 --> 00:55:17,560
Speaker 1: think what makes our relationship work is I agree with

1092
00:55:17,640 --> 00:55:21,520
Speaker 1: Rachel that what makes our relationship work is trust, patience,

1093
00:55:22,120 --> 00:55:24,359
Speaker 1: And I think the other real thing that makes us

1094
00:55:24,400 --> 00:55:26,319
Speaker 1: work is I think we've both accepted the fact that

1095
00:55:26,360 --> 00:55:28,680
Speaker 1: you're not necessarily going to change the other one, and

1096
00:55:28,760 --> 00:55:31,520
Speaker 1: you really can't go to the final World War on

1097
00:55:31,640 --> 00:55:35,160
Speaker 1: every single thing that might bother you about the other person.

1098
00:55:35,239 --> 00:55:37,279
Speaker 1: You just have to understand and live it. That's part

1099
00:55:37,320 --> 00:55:40,719
Speaker 1: of what makes them that person, and try and look

1100
00:55:40,719 --> 00:55:44,160
Speaker 1: at it is something that creates them as opposed to

1101
00:55:44,200 --> 00:55:47,160
Speaker 1: something that annoys you about them, and you could start

1102
00:55:47,160 --> 00:55:50,799
Speaker 1: of live with it. Acceptance, acceptance, there's acceptance. I think

1103
00:55:50,840 --> 00:55:56,839
Speaker 1: there's acceptance after being together for so long that there

1104
00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:59,680
Speaker 1: are things that are unchangeable and you choose to accept

1105
00:55:59,719 --> 00:56:03,040
Speaker 1: them you don't, and you change the things you can't

1106
00:56:03,040 --> 00:56:06,279
Speaker 1: accept or try to, and I think there's compromise, but

1107
00:56:06,440 --> 00:56:10,120
Speaker 1: overall it's a trust. Yeah. And I also think we

1108
00:56:10,160 --> 00:56:12,640
Speaker 1: have time on our side because ultimately, I'm just too

1109
00:56:12,719 --> 00:56:16,279
Speaker 1: damned hired to care. So eventually you just kind of

1110
00:56:16,400 --> 00:56:24,120
Speaker 1: love them when you're with every guest that we have

1111
00:56:24,160 --> 00:56:27,600
Speaker 1: on our show, no matter what kind of relationship they're in,

1112
00:56:27,800 --> 00:56:31,280
Speaker 1: at the end of every episode, they will answer five

1113
00:56:31,719 --> 00:56:35,520
Speaker 1: questions on behalf of each other, so it only makes

1114
00:56:35,520 --> 00:56:39,399
Speaker 1: sense for Roger and I too. Okay, so the word

1115
00:56:39,480 --> 00:56:41,880
Speaker 1: is the questions will vary each week, so we actually

1116
00:56:41,920 --> 00:56:44,120
Speaker 1: don't know if these are going to be exact same questions,

1117
00:56:44,120 --> 00:56:47,080
Speaker 1: but they're going to be like this, Rachel, what's the

1118
00:56:47,120 --> 00:56:49,560
Speaker 1: one piece of clothing of Roger's that you would throw

1119
00:56:49,600 --> 00:56:55,520
Speaker 1: away all of his trucker hats. That's so sad, is it? Though?

1120
00:56:55,600 --> 00:56:57,719
Speaker 1: And Roger, what about you? What's the one piece of

1121
00:56:57,760 --> 00:56:59,920
Speaker 1: clothing of Rachel's that you would want to throw away?

1122
00:57:00,640 --> 00:57:04,120
Speaker 1: All of her high heels? Might as well get divorced. Well,

1123
00:57:04,160 --> 00:57:07,840
Speaker 1: I want my trucker hats. You have the most gorgeous

1124
00:57:07,880 --> 00:57:10,759
Speaker 1: head of hair of any man who is fifty two,

1125
00:57:11,080 --> 00:57:13,080
Speaker 1: and I have not seen a hair on your head

1126
00:57:13,080 --> 00:57:15,960
Speaker 1: since before COVID. So that full of head of hair

1127
00:57:16,040 --> 00:57:18,640
Speaker 1: does that do anything for you? I don't know, I

1128
00:57:18,640 --> 00:57:24,080
Speaker 1: haven't seen it. Oh who has the most exes me?

1129
00:57:26,640 --> 00:57:32,160
Speaker 1: Definitely Me? Definitely Rachel, definitely me. No debate there. Let's

1130
00:57:32,280 --> 00:57:35,680
Speaker 1: rogers go to karaoke song. Both of us have a

1131
00:57:35,760 --> 00:57:40,160
Speaker 1: really really really large fear of karaoke. Neither of us karaoke.

1132
00:57:40,400 --> 00:57:41,920
Speaker 1: I don't have a fear of karaoke. Oh I do.

1133
00:57:42,000 --> 00:57:43,760
Speaker 1: It's my life fear. I just assumed you did because

1134
00:57:43,760 --> 00:57:45,800
Speaker 1: I've never seen you karryot because you never karaoke, So

1135
00:57:45,800 --> 00:57:47,880
Speaker 1: you've never seen me karaoke. Oh that's true. Okay, So

1136
00:57:47,920 --> 00:57:52,840
Speaker 1: I would say probably for him if it weren't a

1137
00:57:52,880 --> 00:57:57,840
Speaker 1: grateful dead song. It would be the doors like Love

1138
00:57:57,960 --> 00:58:01,040
Speaker 1: Street because he loves to sing that and like dreams

1139
00:58:01,040 --> 00:58:03,400
Speaker 1: to be Jim Morrison. I think that would be a

1140
00:58:03,440 --> 00:58:06,960
Speaker 1: good one. That or like you two, you know, little Bano,

1141
00:58:07,120 --> 00:58:12,240
Speaker 1: don't even try that run don't Oh my god, yeah,

1142
00:58:13,320 --> 00:58:19,920
Speaker 1: don't down the walls that holds us inside. Honestly, it's

1143
00:58:19,960 --> 00:58:24,680
Speaker 1: pretty good. No, he isn't to seek shelter for the

1144
00:58:24,760 --> 00:58:28,560
Speaker 1: poison rain. Oh god, would the streets have known anyway? Okay,

1145
00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:31,200
Speaker 1: if Rachel wasn't afraid to sing karaoke? What song do

1146
00:58:31,240 --> 00:58:34,480
Speaker 1: you think she would sing? What songs in your heart? Rachel's? Oh,

1147
00:58:34,720 --> 00:58:37,200
Speaker 1: she would be singing Fleetwood Mac all day long. She'd

1148
00:58:37,200 --> 00:58:47,640
Speaker 1: be well, more specifically Stevie Dicks, she'd be singing what wrong? Okay, No,

1149
00:58:47,760 --> 00:58:49,920
Speaker 1: don't you dare try and hit that note? Don't you

1150
00:58:49,960 --> 00:58:53,640
Speaker 1: do it? No, that's why I don't karaoke. Friend wasting away?

1151
00:58:54,080 --> 00:58:57,840
Speaker 1: Oh you know what I'm talking about? No, that I

1152
00:58:57,880 --> 00:59:01,200
Speaker 1: think that was even not Stevie Nicks. However, I would say,

1153
00:59:01,440 --> 00:59:04,440
Speaker 1: do you remember when Kate karaoke Stevie next? And she

1154
00:59:04,600 --> 00:59:07,840
Speaker 1: was extraordinary? So that's why I don't karaoke because right

1155
00:59:07,880 --> 00:59:09,840
Speaker 1: when I think I'm drunk enough to get the nerve

1156
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:11,800
Speaker 1: to do it, someone like Kato's and gets up in

1157
00:59:11,840 --> 00:59:17,920
Speaker 1: like thinks STEVI nex. What is Roger's biggest fear? Snakes?

1158
00:59:17,920 --> 00:59:21,680
Speaker 1: Like a snake literally crawling up his body. That's very fearful,

1159
00:59:22,240 --> 00:59:25,960
Speaker 1: and our boys couldn't be more obsessed with snakes. What's

1160
00:59:26,160 --> 00:59:31,280
Speaker 1: Rachel's biggest fear? Everything? No, it's so easy, so easy,

1161
00:59:31,640 --> 00:59:36,600
Speaker 1: Rachel's biggest fear? So easy? I have so many of them.

1162
00:59:36,640 --> 00:59:39,640
Speaker 1: I mean, where do we begin? But fear of having

1163
00:59:39,680 --> 00:59:41,840
Speaker 1: a water would probably be one of them. Or just

1164
00:59:42,040 --> 00:59:45,440
Speaker 1: having no water? Yes, no, how about actually being in water,

1165
00:59:45,600 --> 00:59:48,600
Speaker 1: like falling off a boat? Like that would be world's

1166
00:59:48,640 --> 00:59:51,520
Speaker 1: greatest fear? Yeah, well, like that's actually a fear, like

1167
00:59:51,520 --> 00:59:53,720
Speaker 1: I've nice, Well, why do we Well, let's know, what

1168
00:59:53,760 --> 00:59:57,200
Speaker 1: about being in a plane? Yeah, about being in a

1169
00:59:57,240 --> 01:00:01,120
Speaker 1: crowded area? What about Wait a second, I would I

1170
01:00:01,120 --> 01:00:03,720
Speaker 1: would write a second? I think Rachel's Phoebeck, Hey, this

1171
01:00:03,800 --> 01:00:06,920
Speaker 1: was not an opportunity for you to go. I'm sorry, Mary,

1172
01:00:07,040 --> 01:00:09,800
Speaker 1: So I would say Rachel has many fears, but her

1173
01:00:09,880 --> 01:00:12,960
Speaker 1: top fears would be fear of water, fear of heights,

1174
01:00:13,000 --> 01:00:16,760
Speaker 1: fear of crowds, fear of loud noise and let's leave

1175
01:00:16,800 --> 01:00:18,960
Speaker 1: it at that. Yeah, let's some good ones. Hey, Rich,

1176
01:00:19,040 --> 01:00:21,840
Speaker 1: can I do something on our very first episode? I'm

1177
01:00:21,840 --> 01:00:23,840
Speaker 1: not sure. I'm scared. Well, you know I'm You know

1178
01:00:23,880 --> 01:00:26,720
Speaker 1: I like writing, right, No, oh, you don't know about

1179
01:00:26,720 --> 01:00:29,760
Speaker 1: about about thirty years writing? Well, you know I like

1180
01:00:29,840 --> 01:00:32,760
Speaker 1: to speak sometimes if if I know you like to speak,

1181
01:00:32,880 --> 01:00:35,320
Speaker 1: I mean sometimes I like to put my thoughts into work. No,

1182
01:00:35,440 --> 01:00:38,440
Speaker 1: I do. And actually I will say this, there's no

1183
01:00:38,440 --> 01:00:41,440
Speaker 1: one that writes cards better than you. And what about poems.

1184
01:00:42,520 --> 01:00:45,200
Speaker 1: You're you're good at poems. You're really good at poems. Actually,

1185
01:00:45,280 --> 01:00:47,440
Speaker 1: when you when you when you care enough to write one? Well,

1186
01:00:47,480 --> 01:00:50,360
Speaker 1: I think on this momentous occasion, which is our new podcast,

1187
01:00:50,520 --> 01:00:52,120
Speaker 1: I put down a few words and I wrote myself

1188
01:00:52,120 --> 01:00:53,920
Speaker 1: a poem. I wrote us a poem. It's sort of like,

1189
01:00:53,960 --> 01:00:56,800
Speaker 1: maybe it's our theme poem. Although you haven't heard it. Yes,

1190
01:00:56,840 --> 01:00:58,440
Speaker 1: you're probably gonna hate it. So if you like it,

1191
01:00:58,480 --> 01:01:00,680
Speaker 1: maybe it'll be your theme Poe. And we could post

1192
01:01:00,720 --> 01:01:03,560
Speaker 1: this somewhere, not that anyone cares. It's very short for

1193
01:01:03,760 --> 01:01:06,000
Speaker 1: you guys, don't have to listen to a sleeveless shirt

1194
01:01:06,120 --> 01:01:09,800
Speaker 1: because I have such huge guns. Obviously, well not so obviously.

1195
01:01:09,880 --> 01:01:12,840
Speaker 1: But the name of this poem is it works for us.

1196
01:01:13,080 --> 01:01:16,480
Speaker 1: Also the name of this podcast. I know, I'm amazing.

1197
01:01:16,680 --> 01:01:21,080
Speaker 1: Here we are again taking the plunge. We've been here before.

1198
01:01:21,680 --> 01:01:24,840
Speaker 1: Those days were fun. We're a little bit older with

1199
01:01:24,880 --> 01:01:28,640
Speaker 1: some wisdom to share. Along with some guests who will

1200
01:01:28,680 --> 01:01:31,640
Speaker 1: come on our air. We'll try and help out as

1201
01:01:31,680 --> 01:01:37,800
Speaker 1: best as we can. Giving advice is part of the plan. Partners, lovers,

1202
01:01:38,040 --> 01:01:40,760
Speaker 1: workers will cover them all and try and give some

1203
01:01:40,840 --> 01:01:44,160
Speaker 1: advice so you make the right call. No, we aren't

1204
01:01:44,200 --> 01:01:48,160
Speaker 1: real doctors. We can't prescribe drugs, but an ad here

1205
01:01:48,240 --> 01:01:51,080
Speaker 1: or there, we're happy to plug. We'll hope for the

1206
01:01:51,160 --> 01:01:55,360
Speaker 1: best and prepare for the worst. Nothing worth having doesn't

1207
01:01:55,360 --> 01:01:58,240
Speaker 1: start with the first. What I do know for certain

1208
01:01:58,520 --> 01:02:02,000
Speaker 1: is we have each other's trust. Well each do our part.

1209
01:02:02,360 --> 01:02:05,720
Speaker 1: It works for us. So I thought that was kind

1210
01:02:05,760 --> 01:02:12,920
Speaker 1: of a cool, little diddy. I'm exhausted. That was the

1211
01:02:12,960 --> 01:02:16,760
Speaker 1: most exhausting hour of the last year. I actually don't

1212
01:02:16,760 --> 01:02:21,240
Speaker 1: remember the last time we sat still next to each

1213
01:02:21,280 --> 01:02:24,520
Speaker 1: other and talked for that long. I don't think you remember,

1214
01:02:24,520 --> 01:02:26,880
Speaker 1: because I don't think it's ever happened. Because I'm actually

1215
01:02:26,880 --> 01:02:29,640
Speaker 1: pretty sure. You've never sat still for that long and

1216
01:02:29,720 --> 01:02:33,160
Speaker 1: had a single conversation with anybody. Are you proud of me?

1217
01:02:33,760 --> 01:02:37,560
Speaker 1: I'm not sure yet. Can you be? I'm not sure yet.

1218
01:02:37,640 --> 01:02:43,560
Speaker 1: Do I get a reward? I'm not sure yet. What

1219
01:02:43,640 --> 01:02:47,240
Speaker 1: was your favorite part? My favorite part is talking to you,

1220
01:02:47,320 --> 01:02:50,720
Speaker 1: my love, having undivided attention, looking and staring at your

1221
01:02:50,720 --> 01:03:00,760
Speaker 1: eyes and just wondering, Wow, I'm so fulfilled your attitude?

1222
01:03:01,560 --> 01:03:04,960
Speaker 1: What's wrong with my attitude? I love you? Let's move on.

1223
01:03:05,120 --> 01:03:07,320
Speaker 1: What you're being the mean one? Now? No, because I'm

1224
01:03:07,360 --> 01:03:11,160
Speaker 1: I have really good reason to believe you're being really

1225
01:03:11,160 --> 01:03:13,720
Speaker 1: sarcastic and obnoxious right now. So let's just move on,

1226
01:03:14,560 --> 01:03:18,840
Speaker 1: all right, Let's go to the next subject. Ready, Well,

1227
01:03:18,880 --> 01:03:23,680
Speaker 1: that was good for me? Was it good for you? No?

1228
01:03:25,520 --> 01:03:28,919
Speaker 1: What do you mean? No? No? Was it? I thought

1229
01:03:28,920 --> 01:03:34,520
Speaker 1: it was amazing. I think you're very different interpretations of

1230
01:03:34,520 --> 01:03:36,920
Speaker 1: our story. I think you should leave it up to

1231
01:03:37,000 --> 01:03:41,040
Speaker 1: everyone's imagination of what we're talking about. I'm talking about

1232
01:03:41,080 --> 01:03:45,080
Speaker 1: what we just did together. I'm aware, honey, and I

1233
01:03:45,120 --> 01:03:48,840
Speaker 1: thought it was amazing. Well, because I think we agree

1234
01:03:49,000 --> 01:03:51,480
Speaker 1: somehow at the core, despite the fact that we are

1235
01:03:51,600 --> 01:03:57,600
Speaker 1: very different, what makes us work or doesn't. I think

1236
01:03:57,600 --> 01:04:01,800
Speaker 1: we work so well because we fit together so well. See,

1237
01:04:01,840 --> 01:04:03,560
Speaker 1: I actually think we work so well because I have

1238
01:04:03,560 --> 01:04:07,320
Speaker 1: a tremendous amount of patients, and that even though there's

1239
01:04:07,400 --> 01:04:09,360
Speaker 1: moments I want to literally punch you in the face,

1240
01:04:09,360 --> 01:04:11,000
Speaker 1: I kind of want to hug you three minutes later.

1241
01:04:11,440 --> 01:04:18,320
Speaker 1: So that's I think our secretsaus Okay, So we wanted

1242
01:04:18,360 --> 01:04:20,919
Speaker 1: to leave you with a little highlight and low light

1243
01:04:21,080 --> 01:04:24,640
Speaker 1: from our week. In relationships, the bad definitely comes with

1244
01:04:24,680 --> 01:04:26,960
Speaker 1: the good, So this is our time to mention a

1245
01:04:27,000 --> 01:04:30,480
Speaker 1: little bit of both of those things. Okay, babe, what

1246
01:04:30,680 --> 01:04:35,280
Speaker 1: was your highlight and lowlight of this week? This week,

1247
01:04:35,440 --> 01:04:39,400
Speaker 1: my highlight had to be making sweet love to you?

1248
01:04:40,280 --> 01:04:42,959
Speaker 1: Did you actually just say that? Because I want to die?

1249
01:04:43,400 --> 01:04:45,120
Speaker 1: Do you want to hear what my lowlight is? I

1250
01:04:45,120 --> 01:04:47,920
Speaker 1: am dead? What do you want to ask what my

1251
01:04:47,960 --> 01:04:50,560
Speaker 1: lowlight is? I'm not over the highlight. I want to cry. Well,

1252
01:04:51,040 --> 01:04:52,440
Speaker 1: you'll get to the low light. If we're going to

1253
01:04:52,520 --> 01:04:55,160
Speaker 1: send our kids to therapy really soon, kid, our kids

1254
01:04:55,200 --> 01:04:59,520
Speaker 1: kind of aren't therapy anyway. What is your low light?

1255
01:05:00,800 --> 01:05:03,040
Speaker 1: When I tried to make sweet love to you and

1256
01:05:03,080 --> 01:05:06,400
Speaker 1: you rebuffed me, I don't even know what rebuffed means,

1257
01:05:06,400 --> 01:05:09,360
Speaker 1: but I assume that's another word for reject Indeed, it

1258
01:05:09,440 --> 01:05:14,040
Speaker 1: is okay, Well, my high seems start a bit different, sweetheart.

1259
01:05:14,080 --> 01:05:16,200
Speaker 1: What would your highlights and low lights be for this week?

1260
01:05:16,680 --> 01:05:21,600
Speaker 1: The same? No, my highlights were that by six am

1261
01:05:21,640 --> 01:05:25,520
Speaker 1: every day this week there was burning hot Starbucks waiting

1262
01:05:25,520 --> 01:05:27,160
Speaker 1: for me in the kitchen when I walked in with

1263
01:05:27,240 --> 01:05:29,440
Speaker 1: one eye open after the new puppy kept me up

1264
01:05:29,480 --> 01:05:33,800
Speaker 1: all night. So that would be the highlights. And what

1265
01:05:33,840 --> 01:05:36,560
Speaker 1: would your lowlight be this week? My love? On one

1266
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Speaker 1: of those days the Starbucks was wrong. That is, for

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Speaker 1: our listeners, devastating news. That is a lowlight in Rachel's world.

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Speaker 1: So if you liked what you've heard so far, or

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Speaker 1: even if you didn't, because we're really desperate, please make

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Speaker 1: sure you're subscribed on Apple Podcasts and give us a

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Speaker 1: rating review. Keep listening and give us a good review. Please.

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Speaker 1: We even have a promotion going on where your rating

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Speaker 1: in review might win you a cure your box, so

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Speaker 1: check us out on our Instagram to find out more

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Speaker 1: about that offer. This podcast is sponsored by Better Help. So.

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Speaker 1: I know we've already talked about the importance of mental

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Speaker 1: health in this episode, but it's so important that I

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Speaker 1: actually can't say it enough. If something is interfering with

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Speaker 1: your happiness or keeping you from being the best version

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Speaker 1: of yourself, you owe it to yourself to get help,

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Speaker 1: and therapy is the help you deserve. Better Help is

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Speaker 1: so convenient that there's actually no excuse not to try it.

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Speaker 1: If you're curious about the experience, you can schedule a

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Speaker 1: weekly video or phone session so you don't have to

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Speaker 1: try to fit in an in person therapy session into

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Speaker 1: your weekly schedule. You can do your sessions from the

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Speaker 1: comfort of your home, which especially helps during these crazy times.

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Speaker 1: And if you're worried that you might not mesh with

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Speaker 1: your therapist, let me put your mind at ease. Better

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Speaker 1: Help is committed to facilitating great therapeutic matches, so they

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Speaker 1: make it easy and free to change counselors if needed.

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Speaker 1: Because if it's not a fit, it's actually not going

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Speaker 1: to work, and better Help is dedicated to making it work.

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Speaker 1: This podcast is sponsored by Better Help and Works for Us.

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Speaker 1: Listeners get ten percent off their first month at betterhelp

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Speaker 1: dot com slash works, so don't wait. Visit betterhelp dot

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Speaker 1: who have taken charge of their mental health with the

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Speaker 1: help of an experienced professional