Speaker 1: Start up, dot up, start up, Brooklyn Boy, start up,
Speaker 1: Brooklyn Boys Data. They make it noise data, dot up Bonus.
Speaker 1: This is a Brookelyn Boys bonus episode. It's free and
Speaker 1: it's dessert tree dessert. It's like a treat. It's a
Speaker 1: free treat treat. It is not a trick. This is
Speaker 1: a treat for you. But it's a bonus of tricks
Speaker 1: we've played. Yeah, and more importantly Halloween related tricks or
Speaker 1: otherwise known as phone taps. So it's almost leftover candy
Speaker 1: because this is stuff that we didn't get to play
Speaker 1: on the big show, but we thought would be more
Speaker 1: appropriate to play on our Brooklyn Boys podcast. And uh,
Speaker 1: in other words, Elvis, if you want to play it,
Speaker 1: because sometimes when we pitch things to him and he
Speaker 1: doesn't like it, he'll go, you know what, do it
Speaker 1: on your show, And then Brotie and I look at
Speaker 1: each other and we go podcast. That's that's how the
Speaker 1: unused jokes segments started here, right, No, you're not gonna
Speaker 1: do the joke. Don't want to play body's parody? Okay,
Speaker 1: speaking of which, I have a couple of Halloween parodies
Speaker 1: that I wrote for this year that I played for tomorrow,
Speaker 1: didn't have time to the load into the system, so
Speaker 1: we might I don't want to promise things. And then
Speaker 1: that one girl gets upset on the iTunes And by
Speaker 1: the way, about fifteen people gave us five star reviews
Speaker 1: since we mentioned it. Did they? Some of them said,
Speaker 1: I don't even use iTunes, but I signed up. I
Speaker 1: got an iTunes I can leave a review. We appreciate that.
Speaker 1: Thank you. We're the ones from Google Play. Can you
Speaker 1: not get reviews on there? Because you can try? I
Speaker 1: think I don't think you can go ahead and review
Speaker 1: us anyway. Yeah, that would be great all right? Well,
Speaker 1: also again, still still would love me to follow me
Speaker 1: on Instagram. Thank you everybody. And we we cannot talk
Speaker 1: enough about the I Heart Podcast Awards going down January
Speaker 1: eight in Los Angeles. Uh, if you've been slacking, we
Speaker 1: need your help because you want to be packing and
Speaker 1: vote for us five times a day. Google account, that's right,
Speaker 1: I happen to have five Google accounts. Go to my
Speaker 1: heart podcast dot com and by your your YouTube account.
Speaker 1: That's look at Google account and under the comedy section,
Speaker 1: vote for the Brooklyn Boys podcast. We need five. Those
Speaker 1: are five votes right there and from from you vote,
Speaker 1: and then it says you voted, and then it says
Speaker 1: four more votes. Click that red button, give us the
Speaker 1: five thanks and then appreciate. Log in from another email
Speaker 1: address or use multiple browsers. Get off the log in
Speaker 1: every day. You can use your like you know, your
Speaker 1: Pam twenty five at Gmail in one browser and you're
Speaker 1: a sexy girl eighteen in the other brows there's way
Speaker 1: of squeezing votes for us a day. And of course,
Speaker 1: if you're gonna do it on social media, Twitter and Instagram,
Speaker 1: every Twitter account, make sure it includes all the following
Speaker 1: hashtags hashtag Brooklyn Boys not the Brooklyn Boys. Think it
Speaker 1: does not count. I asked hashtag Brooklyn Boys, hashtag comedy
Speaker 1: podcast and hashtag I higheart podcasts Awards. Just look at
Speaker 1: all the tweets we've done. Just copy and paste, but
Speaker 1: don't like do two or reword it or I'm voting
Speaker 1: for hashtag best Comedy Podcast. Do you know the way
Speaker 1: hashtags work? You click on them and then you see
Speaker 1: all the other ones. Well, if you reward it when
Speaker 1: you click on it, you won't see the ones. Definitely
Speaker 1: need your help. Just keep going. Uh t F N
Speaker 1: s A P till further notice and as soon as possible.
Speaker 1: Rapido Rapid Doough, Wow, rapid Dough. Do you know it's
Speaker 1: a place on sixth Avenue that opened. It's called Rapidough
Speaker 1: and it's all sandwich wraps. And I'm like, why did
Speaker 1: I think of w R A p w r A
Speaker 1: p I d Oh it's called what about a hip
Speaker 1: hop place called r A p I d o u
Speaker 1: H d o u g h rappid? Oh my god,
Speaker 1: a hip hop pizza or a Simpsons place like r
Speaker 1: A p I d o H have like hip hop
Speaker 1: Simpsons Rapid Dog don't get like, you know, home all right,
Speaker 1: So we want to get right to it here. This
Speaker 1: is not gonna be a long podcast. I don't want
Speaker 1: to hear your bitch. Yes, I gotta commute. They're already saying,
Speaker 1: what did you mean? This is seventeen minutes. This is
Speaker 1: a no. We're gonna do another podcast tomorrow. Well yeah,
Speaker 1: so the next podcast you here will be a day
Speaker 1: after this one. That will be episode fifty nine. Whatever
Speaker 1: one is what this is called. No, this is called bonus.
Speaker 1: This is no. This is bonus, but no, it's fifty nine.
Speaker 1: It's about we have to keep him in numerical order. Okay,
Speaker 1: so this is a bonus fifty nine, which happens to
Speaker 1: be a bonus. So we're going to name it fifty nine. No,
Speaker 1: but here's a problem, berdie. If you call it fifty nine,
Speaker 1: they're gonna be like you didn't. We didn't get a
Speaker 1: full podcast worth of material. That's no, fifty nine could
Speaker 1: be a bonus. Zero is a bonus. It was still
Speaker 1: a number. Well, if you okay, we'll name a fifty nine,
Speaker 1: and we've done other bonus episodes we'll call it. But
Speaker 1: if you if you criticize us for calling a bonus,
Speaker 1: hey guess what, you'll never get a bonus episode again.
Speaker 1: I'll give you a bonus see your bone. Also, as
Speaker 1: much as we appreciate it, we can't normally do two episodes,
Speaker 1: but if we find ways to come up with short
Speaker 1: form podcasts to give you a second one, we will.
Speaker 1: This was just something we thought. You know what, Halloween's
Speaker 1: on a Wednesday. We don't have time to do a
Speaker 1: full hour, hour and twenty minute podcast today. But you
Speaker 1: know what, for the people, let's drom some Halloween podcasts, right,
Speaker 1: So let's let's but I've got rants for tomorrow. For
Speaker 1: next episode. Yeah we do. I have I have stuff
Speaker 1: to talk about. Two hold hold our fire car Insurance
Speaker 1: called me wait, like tell you that story. They were
Speaker 1: looking for trouble. Can we stop saying cheese and pictures?
Speaker 1: I feel like we should talk about that. Now, let's
Speaker 1: do some people taking pictures NonStop for I'll just want
Speaker 1: let's bring this out right now. Now. We took a
Speaker 1: Halloween picture today and people will be taking pictures all
Speaker 1: day and selfie. I hate it. When so we had
Speaker 1: we had an account executive here, which is a fancy
Speaker 1: way of saying salesperson. Right, they sell the air time
Speaker 1: to the clients. They have a very, very valuable role
Speaker 1: in our company. And we were taking a Halloween picture
Speaker 1: and for a client. And what did they say to say?
Speaker 1: They said, everybody say happy Halloween. No no, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: It was a it was a client name and not
Speaker 1: gonna client. But the client did not have an E
Speaker 1: in it. They did not have the E sound. The
Speaker 1: point you say cheese is so that your mouth will
Speaker 1: make a smile. If even that makes it look stupid.
Speaker 1: If you tell someone to say anything, that's more everybody say.
Speaker 1: Elvis Durrand in the Morning Show so half of you
Speaker 1: were like you're and then half you like and some
Speaker 1: of you were on the move. Right, don't do that?
Speaker 1: Say smile? Can I please? Because this has happened to
Speaker 1: me two times now in the past year. If somebody
Speaker 1: you're taking a picture, no, I wish two times. I
Speaker 1: wish two times. If somebody says say cheese, nobody gives
Speaker 1: a funk. If you're lactose intolerant, or if you're a vegan,
Speaker 1: what did someone smart? Everybody say cheese, I'm la dozen
Speaker 1: die and so I guess. I guess I'll say almond milk,
Speaker 1: I'll say lactaid. No fucking say cheese. Don't root of
Speaker 1: everybody and a vegan, nobody cares take the pictures breakfast
Speaker 1: this morning. We said this on the other podcast. They
Speaker 1: broached bagel bagels and and they brought clumpy eggs. It's
Speaker 1: almost like they heard the podcast by no hold on,
Speaker 1: it's fuck you, brody, fuck you scary. Okay. If you
Speaker 1: if you want to be first in that, you can
Speaker 1: have that. You can be fucked first. Okay. So on
Speaker 1: Today's Elvis. On Today's Alvis during fifte minute morning show,
Speaker 1: which in case you don't listen, on the same day
Speaker 1: Today's Halloween. So the October thirty one Elvis Duran fifteen
Speaker 1: minute morning show, we had to explain to everybody else
Speaker 1: on our morning show what a spagel is. We found
Speaker 1: out that Straight Nate, one of our other producers, uh,
Speaker 1: he grew up in Erie, Pennsylvania, where they had bagels
Speaker 1: in a bag and they kept him in the freezer.
Speaker 1: They were called bagels. I don't want to dispatch, yeah,
Speaker 1: and so they are spagels. In fact, I remember it
Speaker 1: was a kid show when I was growing up, when
Speaker 1: it was sponsored by Lenders, and they would throw bags
Speaker 1: of Lenders bagels into the crowd at the end of
Speaker 1: the everybody gets Lenders bagels, And I'm like, lenders bagels,
Speaker 1: Why would you want bagels in a bag? Let me
Speaker 1: tell you something. You may live in a great town
Speaker 1: where everybody's nice, you everybody knows everybody. You may live
Speaker 1: in a city in the Midwest where, uh you know
Speaker 1: what beautiful tall buildings and beautiful scenery and history and
Speaker 1: then and nice people. But if your bagel's coming a bag,
Speaker 1: you gotta move, you gotta get out. If you grew
Speaker 1: up and people told you this is the best bagel
Speaker 1: and you have to open up a twist tie of bagels.
Speaker 1: Went on and on about about a good a good bagel,
Speaker 1: and we'll repeat it again. And you can get good
Speaker 1: bagels and other places in the country besides New York. Yes,
Speaker 1: but they have to be done properly. And the proper
Speaker 1: way is to boil it in water first and this way,
Speaker 1: you know, then you put it in the oven and
Speaker 1: that's how you get The proper way is to go
Speaker 1: to a bagel place. I get a bagel. But some
Speaker 1: of those even cut corners. Well, if you go to
Speaker 1: bagel place, they should have the bagel ovans. They should
Speaker 1: be cooking the bagels. You should be looking around for
Speaker 1: that big pot of No to Spagel's no she bagel,
Speaker 1: not a she bagel. No, not Sheboygan Spagel she bagel.
Speaker 1: Right one too. Right. Oh and by the way, we
Speaker 1: got complaints last week. Who many phone calls? I agree,
Speaker 1: no phone calls? I see, Are you doing a phone
Speaker 1: because it's not a phone show. Yeah, people want to
Speaker 1: talk to us. They're our listeners. There are slices for life.
Speaker 1: I love the slices. We can't do three long calls.
Speaker 1: We do one call. Bonus episode, but I'm sure it'll
Speaker 1: be good. Well, who's first of all, who's giving you
Speaker 1: feedback about phone calls? All the people that tweeted in
Speaker 1: Instagram to be and said that's got that's bullshit. I
Speaker 1: think a lot of people like phone calls, the ones
Speaker 1: who talk the phone calls. Don't you like talking around listens?
Speaker 1: I do, but like too many phone calls. I think
Speaker 1: we should do one in the beginning of the call
Speaker 1: with the podcast, maybe one later on the podcast. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: maybe this person here that I'm trying to call back
Speaker 1: that just texted us at Now, now, if it's a
Speaker 1: shitty phone call, is it a shown call? Is it
Speaker 1: a phone call? Your call cannot be completed as it's
Speaker 1: a call. That's a fake. It's a sphone call. It's terrible.
Speaker 1: That was a sphone call. All right, let's move on.
Speaker 1: Let's talk about why we're here today. Please. We have
Speaker 1: two phone taps that haven't aired a long time. Now, Um,
Speaker 1: what was the reason why yours hasn't running a while? Well,
Speaker 1: the thing is, the thing is mine is very Staten
Speaker 1: Island focused. I did it on a Staten Island woman
Speaker 1: who wanted to rent a catering hall for Halloween and
Speaker 1: Staten Island, by the way, is one of the five
Speaker 1: boroughs in New York City if you didn't. And we're
Speaker 1: the Brooklyn Boys and this is a burrow of it's
Speaker 1: a bridge away six toll set. So I did this
Speaker 1: back and I and I said, Hey, I'm like, I
Speaker 1: was gonna play it on the Big Show, and I'm
Speaker 1: like it probably has run its course. It has some
Speaker 1: references to like like local things in it, like this
Speaker 1: is a better student for the Brooklyn Boys podc and
Speaker 1: we can explain and talk about so if we mentioned
Speaker 1: a street or we don't get it. And then I
Speaker 1: came across yours, Brody another one of them that I thought.
Speaker 1: It's funny, but it's not really suited for the Big
Speaker 1: show right now because it's better for our podcast because
Speaker 1: it talks a lot about Coincidentally, no, it's the Statin
Speaker 1: al one because she's but she's talking about you. She's
Speaker 1: from Staten Island. Also, you can hear. This is not
Speaker 1: to say that Statin on phone Tap should not run
Speaker 1: the Big Show. It's just that these are very localized. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so if you're listening around the country, you won't appreciate
Speaker 1: the references as much. Right, you might, but I think
Speaker 1: we'll you'll still appreciate the characters. The people that we
Speaker 1: call are are are are crazy people and they deserve
Speaker 1: to be heard and by the way, nice people, but
Speaker 1: they did not take kindly to our calls. You're playing
Speaker 1: yours first. Yeah, let's do it, all right, Elvis, Duran, Elvis, Duran.
Speaker 1: Phone tap? All right, let's get into it, the phone
Speaker 1: tap with Scary. You did this one right, Scary, Yes,
Speaker 1: dear Elvis, we had a Halloween party at a wedding hall.
Speaker 1: Book since summer, my friend Lauren is one of the
Speaker 1: party planners. The guy from the wedding hall we've been
Speaker 1: dealing with has been pretty shady, so we've been anticipating
Speaker 1: something going wrong. So why don't you guys pose as
Speaker 1: the shady guy from the wedding hall who's gonna screw
Speaker 1: up our Halloween party. Let's phone tapper. This comes from
Speaker 1: Tricia and Sean. They are phone tapping Lauren. Alright. Tricia
Speaker 1: starts to call to her friend Lauren, and then Scary
Speaker 1: comes on as the shady caterer, which is not a
Speaker 1: stretch for him. Let's listen to your phone te Hi,
Speaker 1: what we have a big problem. What I got a
Speaker 1: phone call from the hall. Yeah. Remember Ken's being real shady. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well now they're telling me that we can't have our party.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, I couldn't really talk with my bosses here.
Speaker 1: But he's saying that they have somebody else in that
Speaker 1: now they're not letting us to the party. This is
Speaker 1: really like Adam gidding me and your chap with desk.
Speaker 1: I know they care the day they got to give
Speaker 1: me the number ANU for him our conferences. Yeah, Hello,
Speaker 1: this is Ken. Hi, Ken, It's Tricia calling about this
Speaker 1: party we're supposed to have on Saturday. I have my
Speaker 1: roommate Warren on the Phone's a big problem. You're trying
Speaker 1: to cancel the party on us two days before. Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to cancel the party. I'm just saying
Speaker 1: that you should have it somewhere else. No, we cannot
Speaker 1: have it somewhere else just two days before. You're a
Speaker 1: very shady individual. And I've known people that have tried
Speaker 1: to book parties with you before and you they all agree.
Speaker 1: You have to understand something in this business. Money talks.
Speaker 1: There's somebody that we have that is going to pay double.
Speaker 1: Excuse me, excuse me, excuse me. We had the money,
Speaker 1: we saw a contract. It's not all about money talk.
Speaker 1: It's about the first comfort. And when we came to
Speaker 1: you back in August, you said that date was ours.
Speaker 1: Who says other people? These are special people, if you
Speaker 1: know what I'm talking about, people special people. These are
Speaker 1: special people, the ones the family did you ever see
Speaker 1: growing up, Gattie, I don't care if they're the goodies.
Speaker 1: I don't care. Are you telling you have the party
Speaker 1: because the goodies, who are special people are willing to
Speaker 1: pay more money. They got much more money than you.
Speaker 1: It doesn't matter that they have more money than us.
Speaker 1: It matters that we started a contract a party. Your
Speaker 1: whole contracts are made to be broken. People break marriage
Speaker 1: contracts every single day. Marriage contract in here is about party.
Speaker 1: Now I'm getting married and there's gonna be major, major problems.
Speaker 1: God is a special. You don't know who else is
Speaker 1: sechel a special? It does not matter if I'm special.
Speaker 1: Apparently you have some problems, so we can call youth special. Hey,
Speaker 1: you're gonna be writing to you while to be shut down? Answer,
Speaker 1: I write a letter in the act. Answer I get
Speaker 1: this news on your back Listen, you're gonna come in
Speaker 1: here with your trashy friends. You're gonna be like friends.
Speaker 1: What's your costume gonna be? Are you gonna be a
Speaker 1: sexy alley cat or like a devil? I mean, just
Speaker 1: think of what you Just think of what you're bringing
Speaker 1: into my catering hall. You this can't happen. We need
Speaker 1: to have this party. Okay, listens, friends, all I need
Speaker 1: is for other people to see what you're not wearing,
Speaker 1: and my catering hall is going to go down the tubes.
Speaker 1: You don't because you're not You and your skanky friends
Speaker 1: can go somewhere else. Okay, lose up to be ready
Speaker 1: for you? Do you want me to on you? Because
Speaker 1: I watch your back. You can't even afford a cell
Speaker 1: phone that works properly with all these crackers. I can't
Speaker 1: even hear you. No, my phone is perfect, okay perfect.
Speaker 1: You are not perfect. You have big white Tress Nettleton
Speaker 1: has life. Not to run a carring hall for a living.
Speaker 1: That's what you do for a living. You run a
Speaker 1: catering hole. Does that make you have You don't even
Speaker 1: come close to the importance of growing up Gotties growing
Speaker 1: up telling yourself get a right special people, if you
Speaker 1: know what I mean, growing up gotties or probing the
Speaker 1: pay triple two days before you and your little friends
Speaker 1: can go somewhere else, someone's basement and have kool aid.
Speaker 1: I'm hanging it up now before I bring the net
Speaker 1: or have somebody else to do it like the Goodies.
Speaker 1: I'm calling a lawyer. Hello, Lauren, Yes, this is Ken.
Speaker 1: I know who it is. I'm at work right now.
Speaker 1: I can't talk about this. I was outside on my
Speaker 1: cell phone. Okay, finish, don't worry about it. Don't worry
Speaker 1: about it. We don't want it at your trashy hole.
Speaker 1: It's your problem now, buddy. If your problem problem, you've
Speaker 1: got a severe case of smoker's lung. The way you're wheezing.
Speaker 1: How many packs of daily smoke? Are you kidding me?
Speaker 1: Are you like? What? How professional are you? Why don't
Speaker 1: you learn how to pronounce words? Why aren't you killing
Speaker 1: you yourself? Why don't I just kill this phone tap
Speaker 1: we're doing? You could thank sewn. I had nothing to
Speaker 1: do with this. Don't get in trouble, Tripp tripp in
Speaker 1: roommate tri show Lauren, Yes, this is Scary Jones in
Speaker 1: the Morning show you got phone tapped my job the
Speaker 1: Halloween parties on I'm dropping bok to check tomorrow. Oh
Speaker 1: you your bitch? Yes, you know it would work with
Speaker 1: you morning And I said, there's no way anyhow. I
Speaker 1: know everyone's voices, Michael, about everybody, so that you have it,
Speaker 1: so she knows your voice, Michael Oppenharmer's voice at all. Yeah. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but we just thought that that was a little outdated.
Speaker 1: We didn't play it on the Your Trashy Hole. I'm like,
Speaker 1: we gotta play it somehow. We're gonna play it on
Speaker 1: our podcast. And if you listen, I mean references the
Speaker 1: Growing Up Gottie Show and people don't know, you know
Speaker 1: the Gotties were like, you know they were in Queens.
Speaker 1: She's another borrow from Brooklyn people. Yeah, that was good.
Speaker 1: I was trying to find the original tracks to that,
Speaker 1: because there was an unedited version which actually went on
Speaker 1: a little longer and was filthier and had she like
Speaker 1: she was like calling me your your mother, Like there
Speaker 1: was like a really there's a back and forth there
Speaker 1: that's not that doesn't exist in that version. Couldn't find it,
Speaker 1: and I know the same thing for yours, Brodie. We
Speaker 1: had another version of yours that was yeah, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: try to find it, but this is the edited one
Speaker 1: that we used on the radio a few years back,
Speaker 1: but hasn't played in a long time, so we might
Speaker 1: as well. It's new to you, as we like to say.
Speaker 1: So this woman lived in Staten Island and she was
Speaker 1: a crazy decorator for Halloween. Two thousen last time that's played,
Speaker 1: all right, but I did it and like A thousand
Speaker 1: two three a long time ago, and so I called
Speaker 1: it a complain about her house. I believe I haven't
Speaker 1: heard it in that long, So enjoy dan phone tap
Speaker 1: well listen Over on Staten Island, there's this one lady
Speaker 1: named Joy who is ned fun of every year. She's
Speaker 1: known as the Halloween Lady. I'll go as far as
Speaker 1: to say she's the crazy Halloween Lady. She has her
Speaker 1: house all decorated, ghosts hanging from trees, goblins everywhere. When
Speaker 1: you're ring the doorbell and goes WHOA. Anyway, an email
Speaker 1: came in from her daughter Samantha and her husband Tom.
Speaker 1: They said, look, everyone on the block is really upset.
Speaker 1: Mom goes a little overboard with Halloween. Why don't you
Speaker 1: be one of the neighbors and call Joy the Crazy
Speaker 1: Halloween Lady and get her crazy? So Dave Brodie pulled
Speaker 1: it out of his whatever last night. We're calling Joy
Speaker 1: the Crazy Halloween Lady for today's phone tip. Hello. Yeah,
Speaker 1: is this Joy? Yeah? Listen. My name is Anthony. I
Speaker 1: live around the corner. Yeah. I walk my dog on
Speaker 1: your block every day. I walk my kid home from
Speaker 1: school past your house every day. Your house is a
Speaker 1: freaking I store. Why the St Transylvania okay, with the
Speaker 1: tombstones and the ghosts and all the crap in the window?
Speaker 1: What's your what's your last name? We're about my last name? Now,
Speaker 1: what's your last name? You called me up and you're
Speaker 1: telling me my house is an I saw. You don't
Speaker 1: think it's an I saw? What are you kidding me?
Speaker 1: What are your vampire? I gotta walk by that every day.
Speaker 1: My kid's Freddy your house. That's the laddie here afraid
Speaker 1: of my house? This is Halloween. Oh well, you got
Speaker 1: a month before Halloween. Too bad. Then don't don't walk
Speaker 1: up my block. I have to walk up your block.
Speaker 1: You don't have to walk up my block. Walk around
Speaker 1: the corner. Is it all the same around? Here's a rule?
Speaker 1: A bunch of all of us? What does that mean?
Speaker 1: You're on this block is a bunch of then why
Speaker 1: did you move here? I shouldn't have. I shouldn't have.
Speaker 1: What are you from Brooklyn? That's right, I'm from Brooklyn.
Speaker 1: Come here like you're on the place. This guy's a moron,
Speaker 1: anthony from around the block. Well, like I said, don't
Speaker 1: walk around the corner. Stay on your side. Okay, you
Speaker 1: don't have to walk around the corner here. A lot
Speaker 1: of people like what blind people like that house? You know?
Speaker 1: I don't have to hear you. Yes, you dope up
Speaker 1: there today. I'd ring your bell, EXA, you got that?
Speaker 1: Here we go? Bring it on. Hello, listen, don't hang
Speaker 1: up on me. All right, come over there and start
Speaker 1: taking decorations down? You're talking about keep calling the house?
Speaker 1: Are you getting off on this? Look? You must say
Speaker 1: you must listen. Lady around here, we talk things out
Speaker 1: with our neighbors. If you don't like it, walk around
Speaker 1: the other corner. That's all I could tell. Why can't
Speaker 1: you take a tombstones down? I'm not taking nothing down.
Speaker 1: Everything stays up. This is Halloween. My kids enjoy it.
Speaker 1: My neighbors enjoy it. Listen, we have standards, walk around them.
Speaker 1: Let me talk to someone else in the house. Let
Speaker 1: them tell me to like your decorations. Okay, hold on,
Speaker 1: ye who's this Samantha? Samantha, you like those damn decorations
Speaker 1: your mother puts up? No, I don't like them too much.
Speaker 1: It's embarrasson. Tell your mother what that you just said
Speaker 1: to me? Say, my mother's too embarrassons down, hays them down.
Speaker 1: I'm not had too much. It is too great. Hold on,
Speaker 1: hold much you want to here? That's my daughter, Samantha.
Speaker 1: How could she agree with you when she helped me
Speaker 1: do it? Listen to me. I'll give you a thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Take that craft down? How much did you pay for it?
Speaker 1: You know what, Anthony, I don't have time for these
Speaker 1: little games. Okay, you want to come over here, come
Speaker 1: on over here now and and start ripping it out,
Speaker 1: and then I'll call the police. You know what? What?
Speaker 1: Not only should you go back to Brooklyn, but there's
Speaker 1: something you need to know, lady. Yeah, your daughter Samantha,
Speaker 1: who hates your freaking house as much as I do. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she called the radio you've been phone tack. I'm gonna
Speaker 1: break your legs, giving me a heart attack here, I'm
Speaker 1: gonna freak and kill us. I'm gonna kill my daughter.
Speaker 1: I can't believe it. I'm having palpitations here. I don't
Speaker 1: believe she did this to me, Shy. Yeah, you didn't
Speaker 1: like that dump either a bit? Will you give me
Speaker 1: sour face? Brodie? What do you want sour me candy?
Speaker 1: Over there? I'm listening to it, kid. She sounds like
Speaker 1: our friend Danielle de Lillo. She does. Uh so, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that was h I don't remember. That was back when
Speaker 1: Elvis used to read the letters. Now we read the emails.
Speaker 1: Both of those were very old, very old candy. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but it's candy done the less. They were good. I
Speaker 1: just haven't heard them in a long time. That's all.
Speaker 1: Are you giving out candy today for Halloween? Um? You
Speaker 1: know what, I live on a on a cul de sac,
Speaker 1: a dead end with a big round thing at the end,
Speaker 1: so you can get a lot of kids because it's
Speaker 1: the rich guys, you know. First of all, I think
Speaker 1: this called the sax On houses that people don't have.
Speaker 1: I don't have it. I'm just I'm just saying, I
Speaker 1: just think that people will assume no, dude, they oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: because I have a cul de sac street that just
Speaker 1: happens to be end because there's a river at the
Speaker 1: end of the block. You think people houses at the
Speaker 1: end of the cul de sac, you have to assume
Speaker 1: they paid more for them. Therefore they're going to spend
Speaker 1: more money in kids. Not true, And I didn't uh.
Speaker 1: Second of all, because I live on a dead end
Speaker 1: street off of the main road. They no place for
Speaker 1: the kids to walk to get to my street, so
Speaker 1: nobody comes. What happens is I keep the bowl of
Speaker 1: candy by the door. Nobody comes to the house. Then
Speaker 1: when everybody comes back from the other neighborhoods they went to,
Speaker 1: they're like, let's do all block before we go to bed.
Speaker 1: Then they ring my belt like nine ten o'clock at night,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, you know, getting ready to go to
Speaker 1: get go to work the next day, were getting ready
Speaker 1: for bed whatever, and I you know, bing dang a
Speaker 1: treat and now a ten o'clock Like where were you
Speaker 1: at six when I was ready to go? So I
Speaker 1: get the kids on the block, which is fine, they're
Speaker 1: all very nice, but I get them when they're done,
Speaker 1: and they already have like bags and bags of candy,
Speaker 1: so by the time they get to me, they're looking
Speaker 1: for things they don't already have, and like, yeah, you're
Speaker 1: getting you're getting skittles and and now and laters or
Speaker 1: whatever I have. At least, uh, you're not me who
Speaker 1: hide from everybody. I literally shut the lights, locked the door.
Speaker 1: You're living in a giant apartment building, which means which
Speaker 1: means the people who trick or treat are the kids
Speaker 1: in your building. Yes, but the thing is they go
Speaker 1: rapid fire. They go from floor to floora door to door,
Speaker 1: and and I gotta work in teams, go with like
Speaker 1: two people. One rings one bell, one rings the other,
Speaker 1: and you get two doors open at the same time.
Speaker 1: And then you play him and go, oh, mr Mr
Speaker 1: Jones only gave me two things? What did you name?
Speaker 1: But give me he gave me four things in a dollar.
Speaker 1: You have to actually sign up in my building voluntarily,
Speaker 1: so you're in a PC building. Yeah, I'm not on
Speaker 1: the sign up sheet. That's lame, except for the years
Speaker 1: that Greg t stopped by put my name and signed
Speaker 1: me up for me. That's freaking lame. So you don't
Speaker 1: want kids ringing your bell. No, no, I would sooner
Speaker 1: get a bowl of candy and throw it outside and
Speaker 1: then say, hey, help yourself kids system That no such
Speaker 1: thing anymore. They don't have the honor system. You don't
Speaker 1: think if I put in a giant bowl of candy
Speaker 1: outside that they would just help themselves and just ten
Speaker 1: twenty at a time if they like, what if you
Speaker 1: put Reese's peanut butter cups out? Get that gone seconds?
Speaker 1: All right? Then there you go. And I like your
Speaker 1: costume today, Oh, green arrow. I love the green arrow.
Speaker 1: Bro Brody was wearing green pleather pants and a pleather jacket. Okay,
Speaker 1: so I put the green fox leather they called fauld
Speaker 1: leather full leather. I put the full leather on and
Speaker 1: I slipped them on, and I'm like, they don't have pockets.
Speaker 1: I catching to put my phone in there on pockets.
Speaker 1: Like that's uncomfortable. Yeah, So I complained to to the
Speaker 1: other people who are like, yeah, he's pants on pockets.
Speaker 1: I keep trying to put my phone in my leg.
Speaker 1: So I go to the bathroom and there's no there's
Speaker 1: no fly in the front, so I you know, I
Speaker 1: have to pull the leather pants down. I felt like
Speaker 1: raw some friends where you had like baby powder's legs
Speaker 1: to get Now, they weren't tight but the plastic and
Speaker 1: it got warm in here, so it's sticking on my legs.
Speaker 1: I'm like, there's no zipper, there's no pockets, they're tight.
Speaker 1: You know, they're giving me crabby. It just all it
Speaker 1: wasn't prayed by the sale man. And I'm so, you
Speaker 1: know the bathroom we go to right over here when
Speaker 1: you're taking a p what's directly behind you and what's
Speaker 1: behind the sink? Right So somebody walks into the bathroom
Speaker 1: as I'm peeing and I turned around to say hi,
Speaker 1: and I see in the mirror my ass has a zipper.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, the pants were on backwards. You're kidding me.
Speaker 1: You were wearing him backwards the entire time. So I
Speaker 1: had to go in the stall swap him around. And
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, I've got pockets in a zipper? How
Speaker 1: did it feel that it's liberating? Liberating so much better? Well, um,
Speaker 1: that's my advice. By the way, don't wear your leather
Speaker 1: pants so full leather pants backwards not a good looks,
Speaker 1: not a good feel. I still don't know how people
Speaker 1: pee in their costumes, in the costume, the costume. But
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying. I was ron Burgundy, and
Speaker 1: I gotta say, I'm pretty happy with this, but I'm not.
Speaker 1: I spent a lot of money. You're dying, by the way,
Speaker 1: you are dying to tell people you spent I don't know.
Speaker 1: It's not I'm not gonna know. You've said three or
Speaker 1: four times, this is a better costUS because I had
Speaker 1: four different engagements for Halloween that related that I had
Speaker 1: to go to between the Saturday night party, tonight, on
Speaker 1: the floor today, all these things that I have to do,
Speaker 1: and everyone is criticizing me for not doing a different
Speaker 1: costume every time. So what I'm trying to tell them
Speaker 1: is I spend a lot of money. Out of money,
Speaker 1: I'm getting every last Nichols weren't out of this costume.
Speaker 1: I am milking. What if? What if? What if a
Speaker 1: bride woman gets married to was a wedding dress, very expensive,
Speaker 1: and it goes to a bombs for the next week
Speaker 1: and she's like, I paid a lot for this dress,
Speaker 1: I'm wearing it. Well, you're comparing apples, and of course
Speaker 1: I am. That's what I do. I don't think Oh,
Speaker 1: here's my question. They shouldn't criticize. If they want to
Speaker 1: buy you three more outfits, they can buy you three
Speaker 1: more outfits. No, but some people really feel that, Oh,
Speaker 1: I can't double wear a costume. My criticism is Ron
Speaker 1: Burgundy's like ten years ago. No, but it's back. That's
Speaker 1: the thing. I feel like you're wearing like a deplorable costume. No,
Speaker 1: fifteen years ago, despicable me. Those little guys Anchorman came
Speaker 1: out in two thousand four. Everything from that ear is
Speaker 1: coming back. So they're bringing back those old school costumes.
Speaker 1: So it's kind of it's cool again. You understand, it's
Speaker 1: kind of yeah. I mean I get to put on
Speaker 1: a polyester suit and not deal with a mask or
Speaker 1: face paint. I'm excited. Probably should have Let me say something, Now,
Speaker 1: that's a good looking that. I mean, it's a well
Speaker 1: made wig. It's well and and then the mustached out
Speaker 1: forget I can do with that. So let me ask
Speaker 1: you a question and you can tweet us on this one.
Speaker 1: Let me know what you think. By the way, I
Speaker 1: will be on the radio stations float later if you're
Speaker 1: happen to be hearing this podcast. What you mean is
Speaker 1: York's Float New York. If you're in Greenwich Village and
Speaker 1: you haven't flat, yeah, so I'll be there. I'll be
Speaker 1: on the floor. There might be a kiss if I'm float.
Speaker 1: If you have a Halloween be Ron Burgundy, Anchorman and
Speaker 1: you know what, I'm not adhering to the theme of Robot. Okay.
Speaker 1: If someone doesn't know what your costume is, yeah, is
Speaker 1: it more your fault or their fault? Like if you
Speaker 1: were not nothing gimmicky, not like oh I combined two
Speaker 1: things and you have to figure it out. If you're
Speaker 1: wearing like like Ron Burgundy, if I'm Green Arrow, if
Speaker 1: you don't know that I'm Green Arrow, is it my
Speaker 1: fault not wearing anything like Superman? Or isn't your fault
Speaker 1: for not known Green Arrow? I think it's your fault
Speaker 1: because you did not You didn't consider pop culture when
Speaker 1: you when you selected your costumes. I'll give you the
Speaker 1: great example of that. Several years ago, I decided to
Speaker 1: go as Frankenberry. Frankenberry Cereal, which by the way, every
Speaker 1: Halloween still on store. Shehell, it's there all year round,
Speaker 1: but they focus it during Holloway. They super focused Berry. Right,
Speaker 1: It's that's three of the five monster cereals, they would
Speaker 1: do it. The other two there was Fruit Brute, Fruit
Speaker 1: Brute and Yummy Mummy. Yes, Scotty Bee could tell you
Speaker 1: that well, but he could as well. He's the only
Speaker 1: other person I know. You and him, Okay, that could
Speaker 1: tell the list of people that know stuff. I know stuff.
Speaker 1: Big pink ass, fucking Frankenstein looking thing with the bolts
Speaker 1: in the head. He's sort of like a hippo if
Speaker 1: Frankenstein was a hippo and giant pink hands, big bright pink.
Speaker 1: You can't miss this character. And several years ago, I'm like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be Frankenberry for Halloween and everybody cereal from
Speaker 1: the seventies, but they still sell It's it's past, It's
Speaker 1: hey Day. Oh my god. Well let me tell you something. Um.
Speaker 1: I learned that very quickly. I went to a Halloween
Speaker 1: party out in the city, and nobody knew who the
Speaker 1: funk I was. They thought you of Fattenstein, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: that they were. They were quoting all these are you
Speaker 1: pinky in the brain? Are you? They said? Five other
Speaker 1: costumes of characters I've never heard of, SpongeBob, Pinkhead. No
Speaker 1: one said are you Frank and Berry Cereal? And that
Speaker 1: was the moment I had the box of cereal with you.
Speaker 1: I should have. I should have, but I did not,
Speaker 1: and I therefore assumed the blame. I told you what
Speaker 1: my serial costume I wanted to do this year, right,
Speaker 1: what I was gonna do? Uh? I have a post
Speaker 1: Raisin brand costume, but then put tattoos on my face
Speaker 1: and post Raisin brand malone. I love it. There it was.
Speaker 1: I knew there was a post but I didn't. But yeah, hey,
Speaker 1: you didn't do that. You wouldn't think I got a
Speaker 1: great idea. You gotta do be a serial killer. You're
Speaker 1: gonna we're cereal box where you carry a knife with
Speaker 1: blood carry and you could be a serial killerver Da,
Speaker 1: don't do that idea. Don't be that guy, Cereal, don't
Speaker 1: be that guy. Speaking of don't be that guy watching?
Speaker 1: Uh Kelly and Ryan, Yeah, so they did. I Dream
Speaker 1: of Genie, which is a classic sitcom from the sixties
Speaker 1: early seventies, went for almost a decade. I believe whatever
Speaker 1: it was perfect for their audience. Yeah, exactly, So Kelly
Speaker 1: was Genie Barbara Eden little pink outfit. Everyone knows the
Speaker 1: Genie it's a famous iconic TV customed. So then um,
Speaker 1: Ryan Seacrest was Major Nelson, her master who was in
Speaker 1: the Air Force. He's wearing a blue Air Force NASA
Speaker 1: so he worked for NASA. He's in the blue NASA
Speaker 1: space outfit. I think he was in May been in
Speaker 1: the Air Force, and then NASA. Don't correct me. I
Speaker 1: don't care anyway, So after a couple of minutes he
Speaker 1: appears again like he makes a wish and now he's
Speaker 1: Genie also, so he's dressed as Gene in the little
Speaker 1: pink outfit. Would have a been showing and she's Genie.
Speaker 1: So Ryan Seacrest full makeup. First of all, I get
Speaker 1: him credit for having the balls to do it. I
Speaker 1: wouldn't have done it. Ryan wasn't a good look. He's
Speaker 1: it's Halloween. Everything's acceptable. But no, no, but here's what
Speaker 1: I wanted. No, not because he put he dressed like
Speaker 1: a woman, because Kelly Ripple looks so much better in
Speaker 1: the same outfit. Right, So I would have put Kelly
Speaker 1: Ripple in the Major Anthony Nelson uniform, made hard dress
Speaker 1: up like the man, but a role switch. He would
Speaker 1: look cuter. But when you put him next to a
Speaker 1: very petite, ripped, muscular, abs abs everything. Kelly Ripper is
Speaker 1: you know, she's in shape. It just made ripped up.
Speaker 1: She's ripped. Yeah, so yeah, she's uh yeah, all right.
Speaker 1: Well to go back to your answer, your question, it's
Speaker 1: your fault. It's your fault. You're saying it's frank, but
Speaker 1: it was. It was my fault for choosing a costume
Speaker 1: that was probably culturally irrelevant, like you know what one's
Speaker 1: gonna But if you go, if you goes ron Burgundy
Speaker 1: and then someone doesn't know who you are, then it's
Speaker 1: their fault. It's their fault because I still think ron
Speaker 1: Burgundy is very recognizable and still relevant. That's why I
Speaker 1: think it's recognizable. I don't know if it's as relevant
Speaker 1: as you might think. I think the people that like
Speaker 1: the movie love it. You don't want relevant to me.
Speaker 1: I've never seen the movie because I have a real zipper.
Speaker 1: And more importantly, it's not in the back like mine.
Speaker 1: In my fall leather pants, my pleatha. When I went
Speaker 1: to school, the kids called the pleather pants. We're gonna
Speaker 1: have a real episode tomorrow. I'm not done yet. I
Speaker 1: want to do another hour. Now's no, I'm tired. Alright,
Speaker 1: well it's do an hour tomorrow. But we do have
Speaker 1: this old, unused parody. No, it's not this this this
Speaker 1: parody aired a lot back in the day, back in
Speaker 1: the day. But now I don't know if everyone nationally
Speaker 1: will get the humor. But I should I explain it.
Speaker 1: I said, you gotta set it up because if you
Speaker 1: I think this is one of me one of those things,
Speaker 1: you're gonna be like, okay, you're talking about let us
Speaker 1: set it up then, okay. So there's a special type
Speaker 1: of bread that Jewish people eat called cola, right, and
Speaker 1: that's whenever jay Z goes Halla, I always gonna calla right.
Speaker 1: So I this bit called Halloween. It's pronoun with the
Speaker 1: spit in the back of your throat. By the way,
Speaker 1: there was a guy who was there was who There
Speaker 1: were two people, uh, finalists for the New York Mets
Speaker 1: general manager position. One guy's name is Brodie van Wagenen
Speaker 1: spells at B R O D I E. So I
Speaker 1: have a problem with him. But the press conference yesterday
Speaker 1: was Brodie, what do you think about doing this? Brodie?
Speaker 1: What he plans? Brodie? Brodie? Brodie was great. It was
Speaker 1: like he was talking to me. It was great. All
Speaker 1: the reporters right. The guy who came in second spells
Speaker 1: his name C h A. I m bloom him bloom.
Speaker 1: So somebody wrote on Twitter, how do you pronounce that
Speaker 1: guy's name? Well, how do you spell him? You can't
Speaker 1: because there's no letter. So my peeps, my heaps, hashtag tribe,
Speaker 1: what I need is I was thinking some people write
Speaker 1: C h like when they're hanaka the right honika, and
Speaker 1: then people go, no, it's hannaka, but there's no way
Speaker 1: to spell hanka. So so I think if you spell
Speaker 1: it C capital H, that should be the new way
Speaker 1: that if you see C capital H, then people know
Speaker 1: that's hot. That's my theory. So the point is this
Speaker 1: bit is a Jewish spoof on Hollow Queen called Halloween,
Speaker 1: and uh it's it's it's a Jewish guyance as the door,
Speaker 1: but that's really the bag. Hey, boys and girls, it's
Speaker 1: that time of year again. Who is it? Happy Halloween?
Speaker 1: Come in open your bags here you go, Hey, what's it? Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's not any bread, that's color bread for Halloween. That's yes, kids,
Speaker 1: it's time once again for Halloween. Who is it? Hey? Kids?
Speaker 1: Geppy Halloween? Here, open your bags I got a special trip.
Speaker 1: This color has got raisins. Don't you have any chocolate?
Speaker 1: I got chocolate macaroons? Does that come? I'll be right back. Hey, kids,
Speaker 1: where you're going? Halloween? A night of ghouls, goblins, ghosts
Speaker 1: and Goldberg's. That was great. I love that, love that.
Speaker 1: Yeah all right, we didn't play it on the Big Show.
Speaker 1: Unused parody for this year. Uh. Our friend Insta West
Speaker 1: who takes a lot of pictures for our show. He
Speaker 1: just walked by with a giant scary fat head. We've
Speaker 1: had West on the podcast, yeah we have, but by
Speaker 1: the way, follow him. He takes great pictures. He's on Instagram,
Speaker 1: is at Insta west e s. He also takes the
Speaker 1: pictures for I Heart NYC. We love him, you know.
Speaker 1: And he's walking around with a scary fat head. Yeah,
Speaker 1: what's that all about? You know who else does scary Jones?
Speaker 1: You're a you know what you? Yeah? Alright, I didn't
Speaker 1: say it though. You fourth quarter. I'm going on Dr
Speaker 1: fat loss. You wait for first quarter, second quarter, scar,
Speaker 1: We gotta talk about that now you have different quarters. Dude,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna lose a dirty dirty bam you you you
Speaker 1: shopped you shopped. We'll talk about this on the next
Speaker 1: You shopped for the wrong quarter And I also the
Speaker 1: next podcast, want to talk right town, I'm gonna forget,
Speaker 1: but I also want the next podcast, want to talk
Speaker 1: about the party. I went to todcast uh beast Boy, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you and I went to uh Q and a is
Speaker 1: little talking talks of our two of two of our
Speaker 1: favorite bands. Um. I went to see I'll tell me
Speaker 1: who you want to see? Well, you went all right?
Speaker 1: I would see Kiss right, he was a kiss And
Speaker 1: I got to see Adam Horovitz and who's king ed
Speaker 1: Rock and Michael Diamond Mike d on stage. Two of
Speaker 1: the best boys. M c A unfortunately left us. He
Speaker 1: pressed in piece uh and the two of them did
Speaker 1: a stage show. Uh. It's kind of the the book,
Speaker 1: the Beastie Boys book which they just released, which is
Speaker 1: and I've got It's a six page hardcover masterpiece. You'll
Speaker 1: finish forty pages and stop. I will read the whole thing.
Speaker 1: I will read it cover to cover. I'm a Beastie
Speaker 1: Boys fanatical fanatic, so I went there. They did it.
Speaker 1: They did a show in town Hall. It was a
Speaker 1: stage show and they kind of relived the book told
Speaker 1: stories the book, well, they told stories from it. They
Speaker 1: showed pictures, video, They even did a couple of skits.
Speaker 1: It was cute. It was awesome that Mr Mixed Master
Speaker 1: Mike on stage there DJ and it was a wonderful time.
Speaker 1: They played at the King's Theater in Brooklyn yesterday. You
Speaker 1: go into deep I was gushing. Anyway, point is yo,
Speaker 1: pick up the Beastie Boys book if you're a fan
Speaker 1: like us. And you know what else did boys Mr
Speaker 1: Boys did? They did this song and they just like us.
Speaker 1: You know where they're from, Brooklyn, Dah and the Boys
Speaker 1: Brock Brooklyn, Brooklyn, daw Boys Brock, Brooklyn,