WEBVTT - Try Harder with Matteo Lane 0:00:00.800 --> 0:00:05.720 Oh, Happy New Year everybody. It's in three. Happy twenty three. 0:00:05.960 --> 0:00:08.200 Whoever thought we'd make it this far? Oh? My god, 0:00:08.240 --> 0:00:11.520 I did. I did. I'm so excited about only because 0:00:11.520 --> 0:00:16.680 of my hysterian astrologist. What are you looking forward to? Oh, 0:00:16.760 --> 0:00:19.920 just life, you know, all of the things. What are 0:00:19.920 --> 0:00:24.360 you looking forward to, Catherine? Oh? I am looking forward 0:00:24.400 --> 0:00:27.200 to doing a lot of hiking this year. I'm very excited. 0:00:27.360 --> 0:00:29.040 We just moved. We're right at the base of the 0:00:29.080 --> 0:00:32.640 mountains and I'm ready to get after it. Wow, hiking. 0:00:32.760 --> 0:00:35.040 Good for you, Catherine. I am not looking forward to 0:00:35.120 --> 0:00:37.120 hiking this year. That is not something that I am 0:00:37.120 --> 0:00:39.840 thinking about at all, So I'm glad that you brought 0:00:39.840 --> 0:00:42.720 that up. You like to go downhill very fast on 0:00:42.760 --> 0:00:46.240 that Yeah, exactly, that's right. I like to go downhill. 0:00:46.280 --> 0:00:48.880 That's what I've discovered about myself. But speaking of it, 0:00:49.159 --> 0:00:52.720 you've been in Whistler, which is your happy place? Yes, yes, 0:00:52.800 --> 0:00:55.520 i am, but I am. I'm I'm home now because 0:00:55.560 --> 0:00:57.120 I have to come home to do some press for 0:00:57.160 --> 0:01:01.480 my Special Revolution, which is out on Netflix. Yeah, and 0:01:01.600 --> 0:01:03.400 I'm doing press for that, and then I'm hosting the 0:01:03.400 --> 0:01:05.919 Critics Choice Awards next week. So I'm here in town 0:01:06.360 --> 0:01:08.280 for a while. I had to leave my happy place, 0:01:08.319 --> 0:01:10.759 which I'm not normally accustomed to doing in the wintertime. 0:01:10.959 --> 0:01:13.840 I like to go for winter. But you know that's okay. 0:01:14.160 --> 0:01:16.840 I have to work because I want to work. Our 0:01:17.000 --> 0:01:21.000 guest today is a really funny comedian and he is 0:01:21.000 --> 0:01:23.480 going to make you laugh. And you can watch his 0:01:23.480 --> 0:01:26.880 advice special on YouTube. It's called well, it's called the 0:01:26.880 --> 0:01:29.680 Advice Special and it's on YouTube and it's Matteo Lane 0:01:29.720 --> 0:01:32.440 is the page. So he's got mad skills. He's got 0:01:32.440 --> 0:01:34.560 tons of different skills. I mean, he speaks a bunch 0:01:34.560 --> 0:01:38.400 of different languages. He's an artist, he's like a chef. 0:01:38.880 --> 0:01:42.800 He's hot, he's gay, and he sings opera. So suck 0:01:42.840 --> 0:01:45.840 on that. Matteo Lane is here, everybody, And if you 0:01:45.880 --> 0:01:47.920 don't know who he is, you need to find out 0:01:48.000 --> 0:01:50.280 because you need to follow him on Instagram. This is 0:01:50.280 --> 0:01:55.600 a very talented comedian. He's a flaming homosexual. And I 0:01:55.720 --> 0:01:59.400 say that because, yeah, well you can't see him, but 0:01:59.440 --> 0:02:01.160 you can't see what he's doing. But I say that 0:02:01.200 --> 0:02:04.520 because he is one and he is so talented. Actually, 0:02:04.680 --> 0:02:06.480 you know what he did for me recently, Katherine I 0:02:06.520 --> 0:02:09.720 haven't told this story yet. It was Gwyneth Paltrow's fiftieth 0:02:09.720 --> 0:02:12.840 birthday this year, so her assistant Kevin had reached out 0:02:12.840 --> 0:02:16.560 to everyone asking for a sketch of how we see Gwyneth, 0:02:16.960 --> 0:02:19.960 to draw something of how we see Quinneth. And I'm like, 0:02:20.480 --> 0:02:23.920 that's like asking me to pump breast milk. You know, Like, 0:02:25.240 --> 0:02:29.120 I was like what, And I remember that Matteo is 0:02:29.240 --> 0:02:31.880 not a cartoonist. I was an oil painter and fashion 0:02:31.880 --> 0:02:35.280 illustrator for years, like TV commercials and fashions and stuff. 0:02:35.320 --> 0:02:37.360 It was how I moved to New York. So I 0:02:37.360 --> 0:02:40.400 didn't know that. Yeah, from the Midwest. Where are you from? 0:02:40.520 --> 0:02:44.520 From Chicago? Yes, Chicago, you're from Arlington Heights specifically, my 0:02:44.600 --> 0:02:47.600 husband is from Palatine. Is he what high school did 0:02:47.639 --> 0:02:51.080 he go to? He went to Palatine High School? Okay work? Yeah, 0:02:51.240 --> 0:02:54.560 And I'm from Uswego, Illinois. Us we Go I've heard 0:02:54.600 --> 0:02:58.000 of us we Go? Is that from a movie Oswegoswego, 0:02:58.040 --> 0:03:00.919 New York and then in Oswego, Illinois. Maybe it sounds 0:03:00.919 --> 0:03:03.880 like a Greek food. Yeah, it sounds like a yeast infection. 0:03:05.080 --> 0:03:07.720 I was. I was based out of Chicago. Last week 0:03:07.760 --> 0:03:09.840 a couple of weekends ago, because I had four shows 0:03:10.280 --> 0:03:14.880 in like Rosamond, then Rockford, then Minneapolis, and then some 0:03:14.919 --> 0:03:17.680 other cities. So I was just like, I'm so at 0:03:17.680 --> 0:03:19.399 the end of my rope with my tour in terms 0:03:19.480 --> 0:03:22.240 of energy sucks. So we just based ourselves out of 0:03:22.280 --> 0:03:25.800 Chicago and just flew each time to wherever drove because 0:03:25.880 --> 0:03:28.160 one place was like a half hour away, because I 0:03:28.160 --> 0:03:30.160 had already done the city of Chicago. So we spent 0:03:30.200 --> 0:03:33.519 four days in Chicago, and I was so fucking happy. 0:03:33.560 --> 0:03:35.320 I was so happy in my hotel room. I was 0:03:35.360 --> 0:03:37.360 acting like a like a little big girl like I 0:03:37.400 --> 0:03:41.600 had finally had because I just need compact things. So 0:03:41.640 --> 0:03:44.080 I had this beautiful hotel room, but I was treating 0:03:44.080 --> 0:03:46.240 it like I had just become an adult. And I 0:03:46.280 --> 0:03:49.080 was organizing my underwear and my socks in the drawers. 0:03:49.120 --> 0:03:51.160 I was like, you're here for four nights, get comfortable. 0:03:51.320 --> 0:03:54.360 I packed your bags, and then I was organizing my 0:03:54.440 --> 0:03:57.000 medications and my makeup, and I was like, oh my god, 0:03:57.000 --> 0:03:59.080 You're like it's like you have a dollhouse and you're 0:03:59.080 --> 0:04:01.960 playing home. And then I realized Amy Schumer was at 0:04:01.960 --> 0:04:04.120 the Chicago Theater. The same night, because we were texting 0:04:04.120 --> 0:04:06.680 one morning and she's like, oh, are you in Chicago, Mike, 0:04:06.720 --> 0:04:08.400 are you in Chicago? And of course we were like 0:04:08.440 --> 0:04:10.520 two ships in the night. So a lot of comedy 0:04:10.560 --> 0:04:12.720 comes out of Chicago people, and we have the person 0:04:12.760 --> 0:04:16.200 here to prove it, Matteo Lane. So I was introduced 0:04:16.200 --> 0:04:18.440 to Matteo, I don't know, a year ago, maybe probably 0:04:18.440 --> 0:04:20.880 a little bit more than a year ago. And I'm 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:22.920 in love with you, and everyone who meets you is 0:04:22.960 --> 0:04:25.279 in love with you because you're just such a joy 0:04:25.480 --> 0:04:27.880 and such a gift and I can't wait for the 0:04:27.880 --> 0:04:30.440 whole world to find out about this person. But I 0:04:30.480 --> 0:04:31.880 forgot to tell you, or maybe I had to tell 0:04:31.880 --> 0:04:33.599 you that. Gwyneth texted me and she was like, yell 0:04:33.640 --> 0:04:35.600 see that's what she calls me. She goes, I can't 0:04:35.600 --> 0:04:39.159 believe that you drew this. This is amazing, and I 0:04:39.279 --> 0:04:41.680 was like, I said, esther, that's what I call her. 0:04:41.720 --> 0:04:44.080 I go, esther. I have to be honest. I did 0:04:44.120 --> 0:04:48.120 not draw that. I had a friend do it for me, 0:04:48.240 --> 0:04:51.800 because this was a an assignment that was way outside 0:04:51.839 --> 0:04:56.719 of my wheelhouse. But anyway, Matteo, tell us about yourself. 0:04:56.800 --> 0:04:58.479 I want to know Okay, so you moved here to 0:04:58.560 --> 0:05:00.560 become what you said early or I don't want to 0:05:00.600 --> 0:05:03.440 butcher it, he moved here to Well I wasn't. I mean, 0:05:03.480 --> 0:05:07.039 I started doing comedy in Chicago probably like twelve years ago, 0:05:07.240 --> 0:05:10.920 and actually the first show I did was in a 0:05:11.000 --> 0:05:15.920 gay club. No, I'm sorry, Actually the firstide it was. 0:05:15.800 --> 0:05:17.839 It was in a bar and thirty or four members 0:05:17.880 --> 0:05:19.679 of my family came to watch me do three minutes. 0:05:19.760 --> 0:05:23.839 He's from a big Italian family in mafia. My grandma's 0:05:24.240 --> 0:05:28.520 family probably was, but not anymore, just like nice Italians. Yeah, 0:05:28.560 --> 0:05:31.000 sometimes you outgrow the mafia, I think, right, I think 0:05:31.040 --> 0:05:35.080 you have to otherwise you're all in prison. Yeah it was. 0:05:35.240 --> 0:05:37.280 I did three minutes on Marty to Rosa's show, He 0:05:37.360 --> 0:05:38.880 Ransom Show, where the whole point of the show was 0:05:38.920 --> 0:05:40.920 like you would win like sex toys or something. But 0:05:41.120 --> 0:05:43.200 I don't know, but it was a really fun show. 0:05:43.240 --> 0:05:45.080 I did three minutes, and I think I was just 0:05:45.120 --> 0:05:48.080 impersonating Kathy Griffin because that's all I knew of stand 0:05:48.120 --> 0:05:51.320 up at that time. And I had a great time. 0:05:51.600 --> 0:05:54.359 It was fun. You just I was addicted immediately. Yeah, 0:05:54.560 --> 0:05:56.920 well you put out it's so much material. I mean 0:05:56.960 --> 0:05:59.160 you love to go on stage, right, I do. I. 0:05:59.480 --> 0:06:01.840 I was just talking to a comic the other day 0:06:01.839 --> 0:06:03.960 about this, where it's like when you start in comedy, 0:06:04.040 --> 0:06:07.000 you feel like the community is huge, and then slowly 0:06:07.040 --> 0:06:09.560 but surely, everyone sort of peels off into their own world, 0:06:09.640 --> 0:06:12.480 like some writers or producers, and they eventually give up 0:06:12.520 --> 0:06:14.960 comedy and you're just left with, oh God, it's just 0:06:15.080 --> 0:06:17.440 me and three other people. I remember at open mics 0:06:17.440 --> 0:06:19.880 still doing stand up in a weird way, you know, 0:06:19.920 --> 0:06:22.520 and I enjoy I really love doing stand up like 0:06:22.600 --> 0:06:25.320 I love being on stage. I love writing jokes. I 0:06:25.360 --> 0:06:28.120 love the the lifestyle of the comedians. I love the 0:06:28.160 --> 0:06:32.000 seller table, I love everything. I'm obsessed with it. I 0:06:32.040 --> 0:06:33.640 love all of it. There's not a part of me 0:06:33.680 --> 0:06:36.400 that's like, I'm doing this until I get a TV show. 0:06:36.440 --> 0:06:38.800 I'm very happy to be known as a comedian. Oh 0:06:38.839 --> 0:06:42.000 that's interesting, because I would definitely say that I'm the opposite. 0:06:42.200 --> 0:06:44.320 When I was starting out, I was like, I'm doing 0:06:44.360 --> 0:06:48.000 this till I get a TV show. And then and 0:06:48.040 --> 0:06:49.720 then I was like, oh, I'll continue to do it. 0:06:49.760 --> 0:06:52.039 And then I burnt myself out so hard that I 0:06:52.080 --> 0:06:53.640 had to take a break from it. Because I just 0:06:53.680 --> 0:06:56.600 went so hard and like with the show, with writing books, 0:06:56.960 --> 0:06:58.960 then being on tour. I don't even know how I 0:06:58.960 --> 0:07:00.880 did it. When I think about that, I don't know 0:07:00.920 --> 0:07:03.480 how you because I'm exhausted without having a TV show 0:07:03.520 --> 0:07:06.080 And you had a TV show four days, five days? 0:07:06.080 --> 0:07:08.280 We how many times you guys film? Well, yeah, four 0:07:08.400 --> 0:07:10.640 nights a week. We had it, so you had I 0:07:10.800 --> 0:07:12.640 was an open micro then, but my dream was to 0:07:12.720 --> 0:07:15.960 be on a Chelsea Handler panel. Well I'm still going 0:07:16.000 --> 0:07:18.000 to happen. We're gonna bring so we're gonna bring a 0:07:18.000 --> 0:07:19.760 TV show back, and you're gonna be on the panel. 0:07:19.880 --> 0:07:22.480 Oh my god. Never. I don't want to like blow 0:07:22.520 --> 0:07:24.600 smoke up your asked the whole time. But please don't 0:07:24.640 --> 0:07:26.800 just give all right, don't don't. Nobody needs to hear 0:07:26.880 --> 0:07:29.680 kipt let's blow if you were asked? Okay, great, and 0:07:29.800 --> 0:07:33.120 many many others exactly, let's get your asshole fived and 0:07:33.200 --> 0:07:36.120 many excuse me listeners. Okay, we're going to get graphic here. 0:07:37.560 --> 0:07:39.960 But how many languages do you speak out the way 0:07:39.960 --> 0:07:44.000 I speak English? I speak Italian, Spanish really proficient. I mean, 0:07:44.000 --> 0:07:46.200 if you don't speak Spanish, I'm fluent. If you speak Spanish. 0:07:46.200 --> 0:07:48.040 You're like, wow, he's really good. Even though I have 0:07:48.040 --> 0:07:51.080 an Italian accent. I sound like Mario and Luigi and 0:07:51.600 --> 0:07:55.720 French and then some German. Okay, some Germans. Five is 0:07:56.320 --> 0:07:58.840 in that world. German is a tricky language for me 0:07:58.880 --> 0:08:01.560 because I'm a Jew, so that hurts my ears a 0:08:01.600 --> 0:08:03.240 little bit. I'm still not I'm still not down with 0:08:05.040 --> 0:08:07.280 They were like, I was doing this citizen thing because 0:08:07.320 --> 0:08:09.240 you can get citizenship, you know, like I have a 0:08:09.320 --> 0:08:11.920 house in Spain, so I can get Spanish residency. But 0:08:12.040 --> 0:08:14.960 because my mother was a German who fled from the war. 0:08:15.240 --> 0:08:18.520 After the war, I'm able to get German citizenship. So 0:08:18.600 --> 0:08:21.560 we've been working, like my assistant has been working with this, 0:08:21.680 --> 0:08:25.280 like customs attorney or immigration attorney for a couple of 0:08:25.360 --> 0:08:27.360 years to get my German citizenship. And then when we 0:08:27.440 --> 0:08:30.160 all came down to it, I was like, Okay, Canada, Spain. 0:08:30.280 --> 0:08:32.560 I just always want some exit strategy, just in case 0:08:32.600 --> 0:08:36.080 Donald Trump Junior becomes elected one day, but by the way, 0:08:36.480 --> 0:08:38.079 and then finally the other So the other day I'm 0:08:38.080 --> 0:08:40.839 at the Spanish consulate with my assist and we're like, 0:08:40.960 --> 0:08:42.280 he has to come with me to the appointment because 0:08:42.280 --> 0:08:45.480 I'm so useless by myself and We're sitting there and 0:08:45.559 --> 0:08:47.719 then he goes, okay, so for your German citizenship, and 0:08:47.720 --> 0:08:50.320 I was like, do I really want a German citizenship? 0:08:50.679 --> 0:08:52.280 And he's like, well, I think you do, and I'm like, 0:08:52.360 --> 0:08:55.319 I don't know. I just don't know. Well, Berlin is 0:08:55.320 --> 0:08:57.880 a very cool international city. They they seemed to have 0:08:57.960 --> 0:09:01.400 repented and you have definitely a bent it. Then they 0:09:01.480 --> 0:09:03.520 take accountability for what the hell happened. When you go 0:09:03.600 --> 0:09:06.920 to Berlin. On every corner there is a memorial talking 0:09:06.960 --> 0:09:10.120 about what happened in the Holocaust, and there are terrible, 0:09:10.720 --> 0:09:13.839 horrifying museums that everyone should have to go to to 0:09:13.960 --> 0:09:17.160 understand exactly what did happen and those atrocities. Actually, I 0:09:17.240 --> 0:09:19.880 had a girlfriend that just came back Jamie Makeup Jamie Greenberg. 0:09:19.960 --> 0:09:23.880 She came back from her Israel birthright trip and it 0:09:24.040 --> 0:09:26.480 was so funny. She's like, you know, there's only fifteen 0:09:26.520 --> 0:09:28.640 million Jews in the world, and I was like what, 0:09:29.360 --> 0:09:32.360 I go, that's not right, fifteen million, and she's like yeah, Chelsea. 0:09:32.400 --> 0:09:34.040 And then I googled it and I was like, oh 0:09:34.160 --> 0:09:36.920 my god, that is scary. I mean, that's why Jewish 0:09:36.960 --> 0:09:39.720 people have to say to everybody anytime they say anything, 0:09:39.800 --> 0:09:41.920 shut up. That is not a lot of people. That's 0:09:41.960 --> 0:09:44.040 not a lot of people at all. I think the 0:09:44.080 --> 0:09:47.000 population of Italy is like eighty million, and that's considered 0:09:47.000 --> 0:09:50.120 a small country. And you just came back from Italy again? 0:09:50.200 --> 0:09:52.360 Do you go there pretty often? Probably like four times 0:09:52.400 --> 0:09:55.199 a year? How fun is that? It's great? I have 0:09:55.280 --> 0:09:56.760 like a whole group of friends there that I hang 0:09:56.800 --> 0:09:59.040 out with. We have three hour dinners and I roll 0:09:59.080 --> 0:10:02.479 cigarettes even though don' how to and just do passato 0:10:02.640 --> 0:10:05.160 and do I'll do shows in Italian with Francesco to 0:10:05.200 --> 0:10:08.199 Carl It was like a great Italian comedian and I like, 0:10:08.360 --> 0:10:10.360 you want to find a house in Rome? I want 0:10:10.360 --> 0:10:12.920 to live in Italy. Oh you will? You totally will. 0:10:13.160 --> 0:10:15.920 That's so cool. And so how do you have to 0:10:15.960 --> 0:10:17.400 switch it up? Do you have to switch it up 0:10:17.400 --> 0:10:19.920 because it's a different language? I mean yeah, because one time, 0:10:19.960 --> 0:10:21.319 the first time I went to Italy and I tried 0:10:21.360 --> 0:10:23.880 to just translate without writing any new jokes. I was 0:10:23.960 --> 0:10:26.120 an idiot. I had this joke that like an old 0:10:26.200 --> 0:10:28.120 joke of mine about how I went to Starbucks and 0:10:28.160 --> 0:10:30.400 they asked for my name, and I said it was mateo, 0:10:30.640 --> 0:10:32.400 and she turned around and made my drink and she 0:10:32.640 --> 0:10:36.880 literally wrote potato. And my thought process was like, Okay, 0:10:37.320 --> 0:10:40.600 when you hear potato, you stopped writing on the car. 0:10:41.200 --> 0:10:43.160 That is when you say I'm sorry, it's been a 0:10:43.200 --> 0:10:46.079 long day. What is your name? So I was like, 0:10:46.120 --> 0:10:48.240 I'll just say that. So I started saying in Italian. 0:10:48.320 --> 0:10:50.040 I was in Florence, I think, and I was like, 0:10:57.000 --> 0:11:00.040 I was like, oh, they don't rhyme Anyian. Also, I 0:11:00.080 --> 0:11:01.880 don't have Starbucks in Italy, so they don't even know 0:11:02.000 --> 0:11:04.520 what I'm talking about. And just a bunch of stairs. 0:11:04.600 --> 0:11:06.599 And then I quickly turned into an eighties comic and 0:11:06.600 --> 0:11:09.120 I was like, the difference between Americans and Italians are 0:11:09.280 --> 0:11:12.400 like the most hackship in Italian. But I was just like, wow, 0:11:12.480 --> 0:11:14.840 I was not prepared for the fact that I can't 0:11:14.880 --> 0:11:16.800 do any of my British bake off jokes, you know 0:11:16.800 --> 0:11:18.839 what I mean, Like, I have to figure this out. 0:11:19.280 --> 0:11:22.520 But what I find interesting about Italian audiences is that 0:11:23.280 --> 0:11:26.240 they all clap instead of laugh. Really, they just sort 0:11:26.280 --> 0:11:27.760 of clap, and I'm like, I don't know if they're 0:11:27.800 --> 0:11:30.199 being really polite or they're trying to acknowledge, they understand me. 0:11:30.280 --> 0:11:31.880 But there's a lot of clapping going on and I'm 0:11:31.880 --> 0:11:33.839 going to need more laughing. So it sounds more like 0:11:33.920 --> 0:11:37.360 the Olympics. It does it like holding up seven At 0:11:37.400 --> 0:11:39.560 the end where they dismount off of the thing, they're 0:11:39.559 --> 0:11:42.840 like like clapping, Yeah, Although if they were laughing at 0:11:42.840 --> 0:11:46.480 the Olympics, that would be really fucked up, especially how 0:11:46.640 --> 0:11:49.839 after how hard those people have worked. So you go 0:11:49.920 --> 0:11:51.360 to Rome and you hang out, like what do you 0:11:51.400 --> 0:11:53.280 go for? Two weeks? Three weeks? Like how long were you? 0:11:54.000 --> 0:11:55.559 I was there for a week. I brought my guy Chris, 0:11:55.600 --> 0:11:58.000 who does all chriskword is all my social media stuff, 0:11:58.040 --> 0:12:01.200 and we did this whole beautiful documentary of my life 0:12:01.240 --> 0:12:03.559 in Rome and where we put it up on my 0:12:03.679 --> 0:12:05.839 YouTube page, and we're going to have different episodes like 0:12:05.880 --> 0:12:08.200 cooked with this chef Luciano when he shows us how 0:12:08.240 --> 0:12:10.520 to make carbonada and we have my friend and then 0:12:10.559 --> 0:12:14.480 it shows how to make and all this fun cooking 0:12:15.040 --> 0:12:18.160 stuff and I had a fucking blast. Oh my god, 0:12:18.280 --> 0:12:20.400 what a life. You're totally going to have a place there, 0:12:20.600 --> 0:12:22.880 I hope. So I need to find an Italian husband, 0:12:23.040 --> 0:12:24.839 is what I would like. Well, what's the gay scene 0:12:24.880 --> 0:12:27.439 in Italy. Do people get married there? Do they just date? 0:12:27.640 --> 0:12:31.320 Like New York, the gay scene is I think l A. Yeah, 0:12:31.520 --> 0:12:34.200 it's very chaot. I mean I feel like Midwestern. I mean, 0:12:34.240 --> 0:12:37.600 I feel like it's true for all stereotypes for parts 0:12:37.640 --> 0:12:40.280 of the country. Like it feels like Midwestern gays are 0:12:40.520 --> 0:12:43.439 a lot calmer than either Coast of gays and l 0:12:43.480 --> 0:12:46.840 A gays are just it's too much. It's it's too much. 0:12:47.080 --> 0:12:51.120 They're so not not too gay, they're too mean to 0:12:51.240 --> 0:12:53.839 each other. There's a lot of it's all about the 0:12:53.920 --> 0:12:56.520 way you look, it's all about what you have to offer, 0:12:56.640 --> 0:12:59.400 and it's all about your standing in society. It's brutal. 0:13:00.200 --> 0:13:02.160 It would be like it would be like living in 0:13:02.200 --> 0:13:04.719 a Lucky Charms box. That's judging you. I mean, that's 0:13:04.760 --> 0:13:07.000 sort of how I view West Hollywood. But you know, 0:13:07.360 --> 0:13:10.319 to tell you the truth, I don't know. I've been 0:13:10.440 --> 0:13:12.640 so since doing stand up, I have been in a 0:13:12.760 --> 0:13:15.760 way so removed from like gay night life, which is 0:13:15.800 --> 0:13:17.760 not the only way gays go out obviously, but like 0:13:17.880 --> 0:13:20.760 there I'm just saying, like stereotypically speaking, like gays would 0:13:20.760 --> 0:13:22.520 go out and go to clubs and go all I 0:13:22.600 --> 0:13:24.480 do is stand up and hang out with comics, And 0:13:24.840 --> 0:13:27.280 I did find that my self esteems a little better 0:13:27.400 --> 0:13:29.880 because I do find like if I walk into a club, 0:13:30.280 --> 0:13:31.760 my first thought was how do I look? Do I 0:13:31.840 --> 0:13:34.199 look good enough? And are they judging me? Who I'm like, 0:13:34.280 --> 0:13:36.680 They're just it's a lot of my insecurities come up, 0:13:36.760 --> 0:13:38.839 not that it's actually happening. But if I walk into 0:13:38.880 --> 0:13:40.959 the comedy seller, I know they respect me for my 0:13:41.040 --> 0:13:43.439 intellect and we're gonna sit down and we're gonna get 0:13:43.480 --> 0:13:45.800 messy and we're gonna talk and me and Keith Robinson 0:13:45.840 --> 0:13:47.400 are gonna scream at each other and like have a 0:13:47.480 --> 0:13:50.120 fun time. So now to tell you the truth, like 0:13:50.160 --> 0:13:51.920 I haven't I don't even know how to go out 0:13:52.000 --> 0:13:54.240 in the gay scene anymore. Like I can't tell if 0:13:54.280 --> 0:13:57.600 I'm feeling left out or if I've purposed. I don't 0:13:57.600 --> 0:14:00.120 know what I'm like in this weird I live a 0:14:00.760 --> 0:14:03.800 straight comic in a way, you know what I mean? Well, 0:14:03.840 --> 0:14:06.120 I think that's I mean, it raised an interesting point 0:14:06.200 --> 0:14:09.160 because I think stand up really calcifies a different set 0:14:09.240 --> 0:14:11.800 of confidence, Like you have so much more to offer, 0:14:12.160 --> 0:14:15.400 so you start identifying or when you're going to label yourself. 0:14:15.480 --> 0:14:18.040 That becomes like the first label instead of the second 0:14:18.160 --> 0:14:20.400 or the third when you're stand up and that's your 0:14:20.400 --> 0:14:23.200 whole life and that's what you're known for. I think 0:14:23.320 --> 0:14:26.000 your identity. It's like I remember growing up, I didn't 0:14:26.000 --> 0:14:27.960 want to ever be I just thought of as a 0:14:28.040 --> 0:14:30.640 dumb blonde. You know. I wanted people to take me seriously. 0:14:30.760 --> 0:14:33.960 Like now people take me a little too seriously, you 0:14:34.040 --> 0:14:37.480 know what I mean, Like I'm no, I'm cute too, 0:14:37.720 --> 0:14:41.920 like that I'm not scary, it's scary, and I'm like, wait, 0:14:41.960 --> 0:14:44.000 I want to be that blonde again. That wasn't that bright, 0:14:44.200 --> 0:14:47.120 you know, like we're we're loud or whatever. But I 0:14:47.240 --> 0:14:51.440 think that stand up cultivates. Yeah, you're just confident. I 0:14:51.480 --> 0:14:53.400 mean it's badass to get up there and fucking buy 0:14:53.440 --> 0:14:56.720 yourself with a microphone. It is. It's and now I'm 0:14:56.800 --> 0:14:59.200 so comfortable with it. Do you ever get that feeling 0:14:59.240 --> 0:15:01.120 where like you're walking out and there's thousands of people 0:15:01.120 --> 0:15:03.560 waiting for you and you're like, what am I going 0:15:03.640 --> 0:15:05.360 to have for dinner tonight? Like you know what I mean, 0:15:05.520 --> 0:15:07.920 Like it's so normal now, which is good. I think 0:15:07.960 --> 0:15:10.760 that's the best performance comes from it. Being completely normal 0:15:10.880 --> 0:15:14.239 on stage. I don't think nervous energy. That always audiences 0:15:14.320 --> 0:15:17.200 pick up on if the comic is nervous, so to speak. 0:15:17.280 --> 0:15:19.920 But yeah, I don't know, it's I think audiences pick 0:15:20.000 --> 0:15:21.720 up and when a comic is nervous, I think so 0:15:22.080 --> 0:15:24.400 for sure. It's like a owner who is carrying their 0:15:24.440 --> 0:15:26.440 dog and they say the dog can feel if you're nervous, 0:15:26.560 --> 0:15:30.160 or like they yeah, yeah, of course. It's hard to 0:15:30.200 --> 0:15:33.520 see someone nervous, like it's not a pleasant feeling. Nobody 0:15:33.640 --> 0:15:37.880 enjoys that. No. Matteo could also sing opera by the way, 0:15:38.120 --> 0:15:42.160 he's an opera singer. He's I mean, what can't you do? Date? Um, 0:15:42.720 --> 0:15:44.760 that's about it. We're gonna find you a date on 0:15:44.800 --> 0:15:46.400 this podcast. We've hooked up a lot of people on 0:15:46.440 --> 0:15:50.520 this podcast. Actually, oh you guys, we should set me 0:15:50.640 --> 0:15:55.120 up then. I'm looking for and specifically people who wrote 0:15:55.160 --> 0:15:57.520 in being like I loved his intellect when I heard 0:15:57.560 --> 0:15:59.920 him on the podcast, because obviously they can't see anybody. 0:16:00.160 --> 0:16:02.720 They're just like, can you send my Instagram to him? 0:16:03.240 --> 0:16:06.520 This was a previous previous guest, but we can definitely, Yeah, 0:16:06.600 --> 0:16:08.720 I mean, if you're into Matteo. First of all d 0:16:09.000 --> 0:16:11.520 m him right, that's a good way to be dating people. 0:16:11.960 --> 0:16:14.640 But also, yeah, if you're listening to this, because obviously 0:16:14.840 --> 0:16:17.880 we have no straight men listening to this. If you have, 0:16:18.880 --> 0:16:20.480 If you're listening to this and you think what kind 0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:21.840 of guy, tell me about what kind of guy you 0:16:21.920 --> 0:16:24.080 think you're looking for, because I've been around you, and 0:16:24.120 --> 0:16:25.880 I've seen you with a couple of different guys, and 0:16:26.320 --> 0:16:28.480 it's hard to pinpoint a type which I can recognize 0:16:28.480 --> 0:16:30.960 in myself. I also don't have a type, right, I'm 0:16:31.360 --> 0:16:34.480 they the older I get I'm sort of more interested 0:16:34.520 --> 0:16:36.840 in someone who's going to make me laugh. Yeah. I mean, 0:16:36.880 --> 0:16:40.240 I know that sounds so dumb, but it is true. 0:16:40.320 --> 0:16:44.440 I'm sort of over like my insecure twenties where I 0:16:44.520 --> 0:16:46.480 think I need someone hot to validate me in any 0:16:46.560 --> 0:16:48.400 kind of way, Like I'm really just sort of interested, 0:16:48.440 --> 0:16:51.480 like does this person have anything interesting to talk about? Yeah? 0:16:51.840 --> 0:16:53.840 And also I think when you're a comic and you're 0:16:53.880 --> 0:16:57.840 already like innately funny person, I don't think that it 0:16:58.200 --> 0:17:01.600 necessarily you don't need someone actually to make you laugh. 0:17:01.680 --> 0:17:04.280 You need somebody who gets the joke, Like you don't 0:17:04.320 --> 0:17:05.879 have to make the joke, but you have to be 0:17:06.000 --> 0:17:08.560 in on the joke and you can't not get the joke, 0:17:08.800 --> 0:17:10.719 because that's a turn off, because it's the worst when 0:17:10.720 --> 0:17:12.760 you're when you really do have something funny and you 0:17:12.840 --> 0:17:14.560 say it to your partner and they stare at you 0:17:14.680 --> 0:17:18.280 and you think, damn it, I wish I was with 0:17:18.359 --> 0:17:20.920 other comics or my friends. Yeah. I I sometimes I 0:17:21.040 --> 0:17:24.760 see relationships of people, gay couples, and they travel with 0:17:24.840 --> 0:17:26.879 each other and they're with each other and they're best friends, 0:17:26.880 --> 0:17:28.639 and it's so foreign to me. I've not had that 0:17:29.200 --> 0:17:31.680 experience yet in terms of dating, where like the person 0:17:31.800 --> 0:17:34.320 is legitimately my partner or best friends. So I do 0:17:34.520 --> 0:17:38.920 feel quite independent that way, Like I don't know. I 0:17:38.960 --> 0:17:40.639 also now I'm so independent, I don't know how I 0:17:40.680 --> 0:17:44.440 would customize my life for somebody else. Yeah, but that 0:17:44.520 --> 0:17:46.600 always works itself out when you wanted to. When you're 0:17:46.640 --> 0:17:49.000 really into somebody, you may compromises. You know you're like 0:17:49.119 --> 0:17:51.960 into them, and so that that isn't Why is this 0:17:52.080 --> 0:17:54.320 bouncing up and down? It's like reverberating just from this. 0:17:54.600 --> 0:17:56.600 I have a screen over my microphone, you guys, and 0:17:56.640 --> 0:17:58.600 it's just been vibrating the whole morning. And I'm not 0:17:58.640 --> 0:18:02.000 even touching it. It's it's my mouth. My mouth is 0:18:02.080 --> 0:18:09.080 so powerful that it's forceful. Such a forceful mouth. But also, 0:18:09.160 --> 0:18:11.920 somebody who takes themselves too seriously is a hot is 0:18:12.040 --> 0:18:14.200 such a turn off. I think that goes hand in 0:18:14.320 --> 0:18:16.960 hand with lacking a sense of humor, as people who 0:18:17.000 --> 0:18:20.440 take themselves too seriously, that's never hot. Being funny is 0:18:20.560 --> 0:18:23.159 down on my list because of course, anyone could make 0:18:23.200 --> 0:18:25.040 you laugh. It makes you laugh as sexy. You like 0:18:25.200 --> 0:18:28.119 them immediately anytime somebody can evoke that feeling from you. 0:18:29.520 --> 0:18:32.360 He's laughing at my bouncing microphone. These are like my boobies. 0:18:32.400 --> 0:18:34.960 It's taking the place of my boobies my screen. I 0:18:35.040 --> 0:18:37.560 do like guys that are more shy. I find myself 0:18:37.680 --> 0:18:40.760 more attracted to those who are introverts. This last guy 0:18:40.960 --> 0:18:43.280 I was sort of seeing who I really liked. It 0:18:43.400 --> 0:18:45.879