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Speaker 1: Two hopeless theaters, one dating app, then there's you swipe right.

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Speaker 2: The question is whose.

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Speaker 1: Love life is more tragic?

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Speaker 2: It's Battle of the Tender Dates.

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Speaker 3: It's the dating game show that encourages you to return

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Speaker 3: the favor and lick peanut butter off of your dog's body.

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Speaker 2: Sometimes. Yeah, it's Battle of the Tender Dates.

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Speaker 3: Wow, where two of our listeners swear off to find

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Speaker 3: out whose love life is the most tragic. We'll explain

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Speaker 3: the rules in just a second. First, let's meet today's contestants.

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Speaker 3: In this corner, she says the two hottest things a

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Speaker 3: man can have are confidence and type AB negative blood.

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Speaker 2: Specific all the boys.

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Speaker 3: Want a first date transfusion with blood cell Michelle.

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Speaker 2: Hi s, girl, where did you go with that?

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Speaker 3: Like?

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Speaker 2: Oh blood? It works for everybody, it's just for her.

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Speaker 3: And in the other corner, she likes to live dangerous

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Speaker 3: and that's why on dinner dates, she specifically requests the

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Speaker 3: table with one wobbly leg me climsy Lindsey.

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Speaker 2: That is my most mated thing.

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Speaker 3: I go out of my weight, fix it up, Lindsay

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Speaker 3: finds it sexy.

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Speaker 2: And here's how the game works.

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Speaker 3: One contestant will start by telling one of their worst

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Speaker 3: date stories. The other one try and counter with the

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Speaker 3: nightmare story of their own. We're going back and forth

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Speaker 3: for three rounds until we declare a winner. Let's get

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Speaker 3: started with blood Cell Michelle.

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Speaker 2: Let's go.

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Speaker 1: Okay, Okay, So we needed a coffee shop and sit down,

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Speaker 1: and this guy pulls out a laptop oh and then

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Speaker 1: turns it on and has this power point presentation ready

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Speaker 1: for me all about his exes.

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Speaker 2: Oh.

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Speaker 1: I thought it was going to be like his highlights.

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Speaker 2: Act like this could be informative.

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Speaker 1: No, what did you learn? Okay, like grasps pitarts. Some

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Speaker 1: other reviews were like positive, others were negative, and then

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Speaker 1: details of how each relationship ended.

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Speaker 2: I can't believe they ended. He sounds like, I mean.

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Speaker 1: He tells me I need to take notes because he

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Speaker 1: has about one hundred more slides to go through.

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Speaker 2: It sounds like you turned into a slide. Yeah, climdsay, lindsay,

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Speaker 2: we're over to you.

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Speaker 4: This guy showed up in a bar wearing a full medieval armor,

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Speaker 4: and I mean I did not even know who he was.

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Speaker 4: And he came up and he said, hey, I'm your

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Speaker 4: date in this really creepy voice, and I said, what

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Speaker 4: are you doing, And he said, well, I'm normally nervous

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Speaker 4: to meet new people. And my therapist suggested I wear

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Speaker 4: this thing, this this medieval outphit as an icebreaker. Therapist

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Speaker 4: does the therapist usually want to disarm someone? And I

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Speaker 4: told listen, dude, you need a new therapist.

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Speaker 2: We're done. I'm glad you gave him life advice.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm sorry, but ladies want a guy who can

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Speaker 1: protect him.

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Speaker 2: And then he shows up and now he's the weirdest.

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Speaker 3: Literally chasing away your night.

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Speaker 2: Michelle, We're back to you.

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Speaker 1: Okay, okay. So this guy invited me to a museum

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Speaker 1: and he said the entire time complaining about the descriptions

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Speaker 1: on the exhibit. Why what was his issue? Oh, because

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Speaker 1: he is an expert, And he just kept saying loudly,

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Speaker 1: Well that's wrang. I bet he spends a lot of

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Speaker 1: time online doing the same thing. No, he told me

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Speaker 1: he belongs to a club that studies the secrets of

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Speaker 1: the universe.

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Speaker 2: Him get away.

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Speaker 4: Yes, I was at dinner with this really good looking

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Speaker 4: guy and we were having such a fun conversation and

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Speaker 4: about an hour in we were still eating and this

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Speaker 4: alarm went off on his phone. He looked at me,

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Speaker 4: and he said, I'm sorry, I have to leave, and

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Speaker 4: I was like.

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Speaker 2: Well, why, it's weird.

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Speaker 4: And then he just looked me straightened, and he said

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Speaker 4: he lost at fantasy football game and his punishment was

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Speaker 4: to go on a date for sixty minutes with a rando.

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Speaker 1: That's not a funny fantasy leaving right, And get this,

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Speaker 1: here's a kicker.

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Speaker 4: He was also married.

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Speaker 2: Oh the kicker. Okay, at least he's loyal to his wife.

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Speaker 2: So that's nice.

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Speaker 3: Okay, Third and final round. We need your best stories, ladies, Michelle,

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Speaker 3: what have you got?

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Speaker 1: Okay? So a guy invited me over for game night.

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Speaker 1: I thought with his friends. I didn't until he got there.

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Speaker 1: It was his family's weekly game night.

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Speaker 3: That's so funny.

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Speaker 4: Please tell me you took them down in dictionary.

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Speaker 1: I'm at the table with five people that are all

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Speaker 1: accidentally preferring to me as different exits. So my name

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Speaker 1: is never right, it's a different one every time.

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Speaker 2: A lot of girls.

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Speaker 1: And then at one point I get up to get

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Speaker 1: a drink and I came back in and I caught

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Speaker 1: them cheat.

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Speaker 3: Oh yeahamily, who doesn't cheat at family game?

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Speaker 2: Okay, Flimsy Lindsay's your last chance.

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Speaker 4: Okay, this guy took me to this nice Italian play

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Speaker 4: and he told me he had this really cool party trick.

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Speaker 4: And then he just started juggling breadsticks that were at

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Speaker 4: the table. That's really funny, I know, and I was

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Speaker 4: shut but I actually was kind of impressive because those

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Speaker 4: are hard to juggle. He was struggling like five of them.

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Speaker 4: And then he said, well, guess what. He kind of

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Speaker 4: whispered to me, and he goes, I have another trick

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Speaker 4: to show me. Okay, told me to look under the

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Speaker 4: table at a breadstick that was sticking out of his pants.

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Speaker 4: Oh gosh, and it wasn't a breath yet, we know

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Speaker 4: that smaller than I can't believe he looks.

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Speaker 2: All right, there's another breadstick under there.

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Speaker 3: Right, we got the final bell there that means the

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Speaker 3: match is over. We have to score it, Alexis, who

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Speaker 3: are you giving me?

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Speaker 2: I'm just scarred, right, Brooks for sure.

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Speaker 4: Lindsey with a breadstick.

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Speaker 1: Boy.

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Speaker 3: Oh congratulations, you're the winner of a Battle of the

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Speaker 3: Tender Days and now you're more than just family on

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Speaker 3: the show.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, I really love it.

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Speaker 3: Texting if you want appear on the next edition of

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Speaker 3: Battle of the tender dates, your phone taps coming up.

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Speaker 1: Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning,