1 00:00:02,320 --> 00:00:06,960 Speaker 1: Talk Talk Talk to We're just two unapologetically black women 2 00:00:07,160 --> 00:00:10,480 Speaker 1: with an opinion who talks. 3 00:00:11,840 --> 00:00:12,639 Speaker 2: What's up, y'all? 4 00:00:12,640 --> 00:00:14,319 Speaker 3: Thank you for tuning in for a new episode of 5 00:00:14,440 --> 00:00:17,119 Speaker 3: We Talk Back, a show dedicated to you niggas and 6 00:00:17,160 --> 00:00:19,880 Speaker 3: these holes. I'm going back to the fucking it sounds better, 7 00:00:20,160 --> 00:00:23,000 Speaker 3: dreamers and chases all that shit. It's your girl, a 8 00:00:23,239 --> 00:00:26,280 Speaker 3: j holiday. What's up, tam, Hey, y'all, let's be tam bam. 9 00:00:26,400 --> 00:00:27,480 Speaker 4: I love y'all. 10 00:00:27,920 --> 00:00:29,320 Speaker 2: I do once again. 11 00:00:29,960 --> 00:00:31,520 Speaker 5: I'm reading this book called. 12 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:36,680 Speaker 1: I reading this book called The Carpentary, and it was 13 00:00:36,720 --> 00:00:39,080 Speaker 1: just talking about doing everything with love. 14 00:00:39,560 --> 00:00:41,880 Speaker 4: I was like, oh, this is already how I lived 15 00:00:41,920 --> 00:00:42,440 Speaker 4: my life. 16 00:00:43,080 --> 00:00:46,120 Speaker 5: So I just feel like so much in alignment right now. 17 00:00:46,159 --> 00:00:47,640 Speaker 5: I just want to share that with you guys. 18 00:00:48,440 --> 00:00:49,320 Speaker 4: How was your weekend? 19 00:00:50,840 --> 00:00:52,479 Speaker 3: It was all right, girl. I don't do much like 20 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:55,440 Speaker 3: literally in the house. I did work out four times 21 00:00:55,440 --> 00:00:59,240 Speaker 3: this weekend. Okay, that's good. Like, first of all, these 22 00:00:59,320 --> 00:01:02,800 Speaker 3: bags ain't that. But they're gonna be real slim period 23 00:01:03,080 --> 00:01:03,600 Speaker 3: very soon. 24 00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:04,120 Speaker 2: Y'all. 25 00:01:04,240 --> 00:01:06,520 Speaker 3: Yes, we ain't we talked. We ain't we talking fat? 26 00:01:06,600 --> 00:01:09,399 Speaker 3: No more right, We've. 27 00:01:09,280 --> 00:01:11,559 Speaker 4: Been real serious about our fitness. 28 00:01:12,200 --> 00:01:15,680 Speaker 1: So yeah, I didn't I went to spin class over 29 00:01:15,720 --> 00:01:16,200 Speaker 1: the weekend. 30 00:01:16,240 --> 00:01:17,640 Speaker 5: I've been going spind crazy. 31 00:01:18,280 --> 00:01:21,039 Speaker 1: So I went on Saturday and it was their seven 32 00:01:21,120 --> 00:01:24,199 Speaker 1: year anniversary and they had a raffle and I won. 33 00:01:24,560 --> 00:01:26,959 Speaker 1: I won two free I want two free tickets to 34 00:01:26,959 --> 00:01:27,680 Speaker 1: the Hornets game. 35 00:01:27,720 --> 00:01:28,120 Speaker 2: I don't know. 36 00:01:28,160 --> 00:01:29,640 Speaker 4: I got to pick it up when I go tonight 37 00:01:30,160 --> 00:01:31,880 Speaker 4: to spend. No, that was cool. 38 00:01:32,000 --> 00:01:34,920 Speaker 3: Nah, man, you need you need a free a free year. No, 39 00:01:35,000 --> 00:01:36,880 Speaker 3: that wasn't sh I know it spin is expensing. 40 00:01:37,000 --> 00:01:43,440 Speaker 1: That wasn't an option. And then yesterday was my mother's birthday. 41 00:01:43,520 --> 00:01:44,479 Speaker 1: So I went to Columbia. 42 00:01:44,600 --> 00:01:46,440 Speaker 2: Oh Sarah, Big Sarah. 43 00:01:46,480 --> 00:01:51,680 Speaker 5: She turned thirty seven. She said, uh yeah. 44 00:01:51,720 --> 00:01:55,840 Speaker 1: So I made her a blueberry, a living blueberry dumk cake. 45 00:01:56,000 --> 00:01:57,120 Speaker 5: It was so good. 46 00:01:57,320 --> 00:01:59,520 Speaker 2: I only had a little sound, and she was like, 47 00:01:59,760 --> 00:02:00,600 Speaker 2: I love dumb cake. 48 00:02:01,680 --> 00:02:01,960 Speaker 6: I was. 49 00:02:01,960 --> 00:02:03,560 Speaker 1: She was like, take some home, But I did not 50 00:02:03,680 --> 00:02:05,960 Speaker 1: take any home. I'm so proud of myself. I just 51 00:02:06,080 --> 00:02:07,080 Speaker 1: left it there for. 52 00:02:07,120 --> 00:02:07,640 Speaker 5: Them to eat. 53 00:02:07,640 --> 00:02:09,360 Speaker 3: Ben I'd have been warming ass shit up in the 54 00:02:09,440 --> 00:02:12,359 Speaker 3: oven in the oven with some vanilla ice cream every 55 00:02:12,560 --> 00:02:13,840 Speaker 3: day until it's gone. 56 00:02:14,000 --> 00:02:16,079 Speaker 4: So good I couldn't do it. It was too good. I 57 00:02:16,160 --> 00:02:18,840 Speaker 4: knew it was gonna big big my back again. 58 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,560 Speaker 3: I'm so fat when it comes to sweets, man, that 59 00:02:21,639 --> 00:02:24,080 Speaker 3: swet of God, Like, I gotta keep eating it until 60 00:02:24,080 --> 00:02:24,720 Speaker 3: it's all gone. 61 00:02:24,960 --> 00:02:27,200 Speaker 5: I love it, dude. That's why I didn't bring any back, 62 00:02:27,200 --> 00:02:28,800 Speaker 5: because I knew what time it was. 63 00:02:29,760 --> 00:02:31,040 Speaker 2: It was just too good though. 64 00:02:31,240 --> 00:02:31,480 Speaker 4: Yep. 65 00:02:32,320 --> 00:02:35,560 Speaker 1: So let's get into our stupid internet news. 66 00:02:35,639 --> 00:02:40,120 Speaker 3: What happened, uh, Boozy asked, Booty ain't fucking with the 67 00:02:40,120 --> 00:02:42,480 Speaker 3: waffle House no more, y'all. Boosy is mad because this 68 00:02:42,560 --> 00:02:46,000 Speaker 3: nigga took a raw potato to waffle House and tried 69 00:02:46,040 --> 00:02:49,480 Speaker 3: to force the cook to make him some breakfast potatoes. Now, 70 00:02:49,520 --> 00:02:51,880 Speaker 3: anybody who can actually cook that shit is not like 71 00:02:51,960 --> 00:02:54,000 Speaker 3: frozen hash brown right, all right, you damn it. 72 00:02:54,080 --> 00:02:56,679 Speaker 2: Got the ball of potato first and all that shit. 73 00:02:57,000 --> 00:02:59,720 Speaker 3: And because he tips one hundred dollars when he goes 74 00:02:59,720 --> 00:03:01,679 Speaker 3: out the eat, he just thinks he could just pull 75 00:03:01,760 --> 00:03:05,760 Speaker 3: up with groceries at any fucking nearest restaurant and get 76 00:03:05,760 --> 00:03:06,400 Speaker 3: what he wants. 77 00:03:06,400 --> 00:03:07,760 Speaker 2: When I tell y'all, Bootsy be. 78 00:03:07,720 --> 00:03:09,679 Speaker 1: Tripping, he do be tripping, Like you just can't pull 79 00:03:09,760 --> 00:03:10,960 Speaker 1: up with a bag of raw potatoes. 80 00:03:10,960 --> 00:03:12,679 Speaker 4: Talking about cookies, He's like, what do you what do 81 00:03:12,720 --> 00:03:13,040 Speaker 4: you think? 82 00:03:13,080 --> 00:03:16,359 Speaker 2: You asked were they even raw potatoes like. 83 00:03:16,360 --> 00:03:20,480 Speaker 3: Nigga, if you took a Russell a Russell baked potato 84 00:03:20,560 --> 00:03:22,040 Speaker 3: up there, who knows what he did? 85 00:03:22,160 --> 00:03:24,239 Speaker 2: That Nigga is nuts. 86 00:03:24,200 --> 00:03:25,840 Speaker 5: I'm talking about now he eating it hot. 87 00:03:25,720 --> 00:03:28,440 Speaker 4: For a little while because he's mad at him. 88 00:03:29,080 --> 00:03:31,800 Speaker 3: Boosy, get up, my damn nerds, y'all listen. I watched 89 00:03:31,800 --> 00:03:34,760 Speaker 3: Boosy brother's interview. I forgot the show this past weekend, 90 00:03:34,840 --> 00:03:37,720 Speaker 3: But that Nigga might be a villain. Boosy might be 91 00:03:37,800 --> 00:03:41,080 Speaker 3: a villain dog because you know he's beefing with Young 92 00:03:41,160 --> 00:03:43,800 Speaker 3: Blue right now too, And I think he's just salty 93 00:03:43,800 --> 00:03:46,120 Speaker 3: about that man's career. As far as I'm concerned, he 94 00:03:46,200 --> 00:03:50,200 Speaker 3: already down this week because your wife caught your ass cheating. 95 00:03:50,560 --> 00:03:52,560 Speaker 3: And now I'm Boosy on your neck about some money 96 00:03:52,560 --> 00:03:56,240 Speaker 3: you don't owe him. It's really weird. It's giving broke, Boosy, 97 00:03:56,800 --> 00:04:00,680 Speaker 3: it's giving broke. It's giving financial issues. Boosy PPP coming 98 00:04:00,720 --> 00:04:02,880 Speaker 3: back around again. They about to lock us down. Just wait, 99 00:04:03,120 --> 00:04:06,600 Speaker 3: lock us back down. Joe, I want to be lost, No, 100 00:04:06,800 --> 00:04:09,160 Speaker 3: I don't. I do, girl, I don't want to have 101 00:04:09,200 --> 00:04:10,080 Speaker 3: the whole people. 102 00:04:10,120 --> 00:04:11,040 Speaker 2: Do not comply. 103 00:04:11,720 --> 00:04:14,280 Speaker 4: Send me some free money, and don't send me the word. 104 00:04:14,480 --> 00:04:19,560 Speaker 4: I'll be okay. Coco Golf won the US Open over 105 00:04:19,600 --> 00:04:20,160 Speaker 4: the weekend. 106 00:04:20,560 --> 00:04:22,800 Speaker 2: I said em black girl magic because. 107 00:04:22,560 --> 00:04:23,680 Speaker 5: I'm so proud of her. 108 00:04:23,920 --> 00:04:26,599 Speaker 1: Did y'all see that video from twenty twelve where she 109 00:04:26,720 --> 00:04:28,760 Speaker 1: was dancing in the stands of the US Open. 110 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:30,520 Speaker 2: Yes, it was a little girl. 111 00:04:30,800 --> 00:04:33,200 Speaker 4: It was a full circle moment for her. That's so amazing. 112 00:04:33,960 --> 00:04:36,600 Speaker 2: And I cried a little bit when I watched that video. 113 00:04:36,720 --> 00:04:37,400 Speaker 2: You know a lot of. 114 00:04:37,360 --> 00:04:39,479 Speaker 1: People said they cried. I did not cry for that, 115 00:04:39,600 --> 00:04:41,080 Speaker 1: but I was very excited for her. 116 00:04:42,040 --> 00:04:42,600 Speaker 5: Yeah. 117 00:04:42,640 --> 00:04:46,640 Speaker 3: I cried, man, because you know, that's a big ass accomplishment. 118 00:04:46,680 --> 00:04:49,279 Speaker 3: And imagine growing up in tennis in that way. You know, 119 00:04:49,560 --> 00:04:51,880 Speaker 3: obviously her parents had her there at the games, right 120 00:04:52,000 --> 00:04:54,040 Speaker 3: she's dancing, and now you actually win it. 121 00:04:54,560 --> 00:04:57,040 Speaker 1: It got a three million dollar check on top of 122 00:04:57,080 --> 00:05:00,440 Speaker 1: all kind of endorsements that are about to come your way. Yeah, girl, 123 00:05:00,680 --> 00:05:03,719 Speaker 1: I love them. Proud of you, man, Yes, I love it. Yes, 124 00:05:04,080 --> 00:05:07,320 Speaker 1: But I don't know nothing about tennis. I ain't been 125 00:05:07,320 --> 00:05:08,480 Speaker 1: to a US nothing. 126 00:05:09,560 --> 00:05:11,320 Speaker 3: I used to play tennis when I was younger. I 127 00:05:11,400 --> 00:05:13,680 Speaker 3: liked it, man, I'm just all that fucking running. 128 00:05:13,760 --> 00:05:17,800 Speaker 1: Play in my apartment complex, you know, just because we had, 129 00:05:18,560 --> 00:05:21,400 Speaker 1: you know, some balls in one of my first Assenis records. 130 00:05:21,400 --> 00:05:24,320 Speaker 1: But it would never like, no proper training or anything 131 00:05:24,440 --> 00:05:27,320 Speaker 1: like that. It's hot out there. 132 00:05:28,040 --> 00:05:31,600 Speaker 3: My oldest sister actually played tennis like tournaments and shit 133 00:05:31,680 --> 00:05:31,920 Speaker 3: like that. 134 00:05:32,000 --> 00:05:32,599 Speaker 2: She would play. 135 00:05:32,720 --> 00:05:35,200 Speaker 5: Oh that's dope. She she quit it though. 136 00:05:36,560 --> 00:05:41,440 Speaker 3: Yeah we all fat, all us so almost got some 137 00:05:41,480 --> 00:05:45,000 Speaker 3: fat ass fucking chur and bitch. Meanwhile, she was walking 138 00:05:45,000 --> 00:05:46,800 Speaker 3: around here with a thirty two inch waist and her 139 00:05:47,279 --> 00:05:47,800 Speaker 3: kids fat. 140 00:05:47,880 --> 00:05:48,760 Speaker 2: You're not fat. 141 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:50,720 Speaker 4: I don't think you're fan not now. 142 00:05:50,800 --> 00:05:52,919 Speaker 3: I would never have been short, Ashley. When I was 143 00:05:52,920 --> 00:05:57,360 Speaker 3: a little kid, I was definitely chunky. Always like if 144 00:05:57,400 --> 00:05:59,599 Speaker 3: I was just no, I look back at pictures now. 145 00:05:59,520 --> 00:06:01,719 Speaker 1: I was a I wouldn't describe you as you know, 146 00:06:01,839 --> 00:06:02,800 Speaker 1: actually fat Ashley. 147 00:06:02,800 --> 00:06:03,719 Speaker 4: I wouldn't be like that. 148 00:06:03,839 --> 00:06:05,880 Speaker 2: You know, no nobody would either. 149 00:06:06,200 --> 00:06:09,200 Speaker 3: Okay, when you look back at pictures and you thought 150 00:06:09,279 --> 00:06:11,200 Speaker 3: you were fat, then it's like, damn, I wish I 151 00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:12,960 Speaker 3: could get back there my own fat weight. 152 00:06:13,120 --> 00:06:16,280 Speaker 2: Yes, right, can I get my old fat weight back? 153 00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:18,120 Speaker 1: That's why I'm never gonna I'm gonna try my best 154 00:06:18,160 --> 00:06:20,279 Speaker 1: to never beat up my body anymore because I know, 155 00:06:20,320 --> 00:06:22,320 Speaker 1: I'm gonna look back at my body and wish I. 156 00:06:22,279 --> 00:06:23,000 Speaker 6: Had that body. 157 00:06:23,040 --> 00:06:26,800 Speaker 1: So I'm just actively trying to just appreciate. 158 00:06:26,279 --> 00:06:27,440 Speaker 5: Every moment in the now. 159 00:06:28,400 --> 00:06:32,640 Speaker 3: Yes, enjoy, everybody shy, everybody appreciated. 160 00:06:32,760 --> 00:06:36,880 Speaker 1: So Gunna had his first show since being released from 161 00:06:36,920 --> 00:06:39,200 Speaker 1: jail at Barclay's over the weekend and it. 162 00:06:39,200 --> 00:06:40,080 Speaker 4: Was a sodawn show. 163 00:06:40,240 --> 00:06:43,160 Speaker 1: Was a packed house and people were saying that they 164 00:06:43,200 --> 00:06:46,520 Speaker 1: were surprised at how packed the show was because of 165 00:06:46,560 --> 00:06:49,640 Speaker 1: that snitch label that people were trying to put on him, 166 00:06:50,080 --> 00:06:51,080 Speaker 1: allegedly that. 167 00:06:51,080 --> 00:06:52,480 Speaker 5: He's you know, he's a snitch. 168 00:06:52,720 --> 00:06:54,640 Speaker 1: I mean, we did see him in the courtroom saying 169 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:57,760 Speaker 1: yes ma'am to a lot of things that some people 170 00:06:57,800 --> 00:06:59,480 Speaker 1: would say it's snitching. 171 00:07:00,320 --> 00:07:01,960 Speaker 5: What do you think get. 172 00:07:02,000 --> 00:07:06,320 Speaker 3: Rich took, he took a shut up, he took a 173 00:07:06,360 --> 00:07:09,440 Speaker 3: plead deal. Okay, he didn't snitch on anybody. If anything, 174 00:07:09,480 --> 00:07:11,360 Speaker 3: there's a lot of other people that we have seen 175 00:07:11,360 --> 00:07:16,240 Speaker 3: in court okay involved with YSL that were for actual snitches. 176 00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:18,360 Speaker 3: I don't think he should have been involved in that 177 00:07:18,440 --> 00:07:21,800 Speaker 3: case in the first place at all. And sorry, Nigga, 178 00:07:21,960 --> 00:07:24,280 Speaker 3: I'm trying to come home. Is what snitch stands That 179 00:07:25,080 --> 00:07:28,960 Speaker 3: majority of people in jail. Yeah, Like, I don't like 180 00:07:29,040 --> 00:07:32,320 Speaker 3: the I don't like the civilians, you know, calling people 181 00:07:32,360 --> 00:07:35,560 Speaker 3: who have these type of lifestyles snitches, Like, why y'all eat? 182 00:07:35,640 --> 00:07:37,720 Speaker 2: You don't know what you would do? If I know 183 00:07:37,840 --> 00:07:40,880 Speaker 2: exactly what I would do, snitch, snitch. 184 00:07:41,040 --> 00:07:41,800 Speaker 5: That's why I don't think. 185 00:07:41,840 --> 00:07:44,480 Speaker 1: That's why I don't participate in any criminal activity, because 186 00:07:44,480 --> 00:07:46,559 Speaker 1: if it's your life or mine, it's gonna be mine. 187 00:07:46,600 --> 00:07:49,000 Speaker 4: I'm not gonna like. I don't live by that code. 188 00:07:49,000 --> 00:07:51,480 Speaker 4: That's why I don't commit crimes. 189 00:07:51,600 --> 00:07:53,920 Speaker 3: So don't ask me this, especially if I wasn't actively 190 00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:55,840 Speaker 3: doing some stuff. And the thing is, what black people 191 00:07:55,840 --> 00:07:58,640 Speaker 3: need to realize is that we are not the main 192 00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:02,360 Speaker 3: ones that boy. These people music, okay, they have white 193 00:08:02,680 --> 00:08:06,360 Speaker 3: people who support their music. I'm pretty sure the Barclays 194 00:08:07,000 --> 00:08:11,440 Speaker 3: was filled with a bunch of white kids, right, Nigga, 195 00:08:11,600 --> 00:08:13,120 Speaker 3: he's still gonna be okay. 196 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:14,720 Speaker 2: He don't just need the black that's. 197 00:08:14,920 --> 00:08:16,720 Speaker 1: Say, the people who probably really in the streets and 198 00:08:16,760 --> 00:08:20,120 Speaker 1: really live by that code wasn't coming to your concert anyway, you. 199 00:08:20,080 --> 00:08:20,760 Speaker 2: Know, right? 200 00:08:21,400 --> 00:08:25,240 Speaker 3: Yeah, So I mean get the check man, listen. Ain't no, 201 00:08:25,440 --> 00:08:27,400 Speaker 3: there's no rules in the streets no more. It's no 202 00:08:27,480 --> 00:08:30,720 Speaker 3: loyalty in the streets no more. It's no integrity, nigga, 203 00:08:30,800 --> 00:08:32,439 Speaker 3: do what's best for you and your family. 204 00:08:32,880 --> 00:08:35,280 Speaker 2: Because everybody is on that type of time. 205 00:08:35,320 --> 00:08:37,480 Speaker 3: It's a lot of people out here who know their 206 00:08:37,559 --> 00:08:39,839 Speaker 3: homeboys snitch and they still hanging out with this nigga. 207 00:08:41,920 --> 00:08:44,000 Speaker 1: Now, it's a lot of that. Moving around to Charlotte. 208 00:08:44,000 --> 00:08:45,359 Speaker 1: I ain't gonna say no names. 209 00:08:45,080 --> 00:08:45,320 Speaker 6: But. 210 00:08:47,520 --> 00:08:49,760 Speaker 3: Girl Love and Charleston, there's so many indictments day in 211 00:08:49,800 --> 00:08:52,079 Speaker 3: and day out, and these niggas be right outside like, 212 00:08:52,120 --> 00:08:54,280 Speaker 3: ain't nothing happened, And the same niggas be who was 213 00:08:54,320 --> 00:08:56,360 Speaker 3: talking about them hanging with them today. 214 00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:57,559 Speaker 2: Because they all do it. 215 00:08:57,920 --> 00:08:59,800 Speaker 3: They all do it when they get into them rooms, 216 00:09:00,040 --> 00:09:03,040 Speaker 3: small assrooms. 217 00:09:03,200 --> 00:09:06,920 Speaker 4: Having his arms in his shirt with a cigarette shirt. 218 00:09:06,960 --> 00:09:07,800 Speaker 4: He about to tell. 219 00:09:10,559 --> 00:09:12,520 Speaker 2: That nigga asked for a cigarette, but you know it's 220 00:09:12,559 --> 00:09:14,960 Speaker 2: a boy. He's about to telling the whole hood be 221 00:09:15,120 --> 00:09:22,840 Speaker 2: very clear, telling him ask you know for me, like snitching? 222 00:09:22,960 --> 00:09:23,559 Speaker 2: Is this right? 223 00:09:23,760 --> 00:09:25,840 Speaker 3: Like say, for instance, I commit a crime, I know 224 00:09:25,920 --> 00:09:28,240 Speaker 3: I did it. You know I did it right? Like say, 225 00:09:28,240 --> 00:09:30,600 Speaker 3: for instance, I do a murder in your car, you 226 00:09:30,640 --> 00:09:33,640 Speaker 3: get arrested with my car and I'm not. 227 00:09:33,960 --> 00:09:36,240 Speaker 4: No, I get arrested in my car because you did 228 00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:36,560 Speaker 4: a murder. 229 00:09:36,600 --> 00:09:37,959 Speaker 2: No, no, no, I let know. 230 00:09:38,200 --> 00:09:40,640 Speaker 3: I let you hold Yeah, yay, that's what I meant, right, Yes, 231 00:09:41,280 --> 00:09:43,840 Speaker 3: you let me hold your car. I commit a murder 232 00:09:43,840 --> 00:09:46,720 Speaker 3: in your car, you get stopped in your car, and 233 00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:49,320 Speaker 3: now they're catching you, getting you for the murder. I 234 00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:51,440 Speaker 3: feel like I'm a bitch ass nigga if I don't 235 00:09:51,440 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 3: come up there and admit that I did it instead 236 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:55,720 Speaker 3: of letting my friends sit for some ship that I 237 00:09:55,760 --> 00:09:59,679 Speaker 3: actually did. You are not a snitch. That's not saying yes, 238 00:09:59,800 --> 00:10:02,720 Speaker 3: that's it's not. The streets will consider that snitching. 239 00:10:03,160 --> 00:10:07,679 Speaker 1: When you're down, when y'all committing crimes together and I 240 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:10,920 Speaker 1: get caught, but I tell on everybody else to lord 241 00:10:11,040 --> 00:10:14,040 Speaker 1: lessen my sentence or to get out of jail. 242 00:10:14,400 --> 00:10:15,520 Speaker 5: That's what snitching is. 243 00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:19,559 Speaker 3: The streets considered any time you're cooperating with the police, 244 00:10:19,600 --> 00:10:23,880 Speaker 3: they consider that snitching, no matteration that like, yes they. 245 00:10:23,840 --> 00:10:27,559 Speaker 4: Do a civilian and you just I can give you. 246 00:10:27,520 --> 00:10:30,480 Speaker 3: A perfect example. This is not even snitching for real. 247 00:10:30,720 --> 00:10:34,080 Speaker 3: Remember future and what's his manager, the one who was 248 00:10:34,080 --> 00:10:39,960 Speaker 3: managed America Monica. Mm hmm, y'all know who I'm talking about. 249 00:10:40,000 --> 00:10:42,960 Speaker 3: Monica Baby Daddy. He he brought Future on the scene. 250 00:10:43,800 --> 00:10:47,520 Speaker 2: He Rocco. Future made a song about Rocco. 251 00:10:47,679 --> 00:10:51,760 Speaker 3: Future tweeted about Rocco's Rocko a snitch because this nigga 252 00:10:51,840 --> 00:10:54,600 Speaker 3: wanted his money out of him after he blew after 253 00:10:54,640 --> 00:10:57,160 Speaker 3: he blew up, we had a contract together. How is 254 00:10:57,200 --> 00:11:00,199 Speaker 3: that snitching? Because I signed. People work in court, That's 255 00:11:00,240 --> 00:11:01,960 Speaker 3: what I'm saying. The streets, they don't. They just don't 256 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:06,040 Speaker 3: want you cooperating with with with authorities or the courts 257 00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:09,160 Speaker 3: with anything. They consider everything snitching. 258 00:11:09,160 --> 00:11:12,240 Speaker 2: If you cooperating for really, I don't know. 259 00:11:13,360 --> 00:11:15,680 Speaker 1: So if somebody kill your family member and you go 260 00:11:15,840 --> 00:11:18,360 Speaker 1: to the court and tell to go to the police, 261 00:11:18,640 --> 00:11:23,200 Speaker 1: that snitching the other family who who like the family 262 00:11:23,200 --> 00:11:25,600 Speaker 1: of the person that did it, They're gonna say you 263 00:11:25,679 --> 00:11:26,440 Speaker 1: snitching on them. 264 00:11:26,640 --> 00:11:30,080 Speaker 2: No, I don't think people, yes, y'all. 265 00:11:29,880 --> 00:11:35,200 Speaker 1: Let us know, y'all, let us and then cooperate with 266 00:11:35,240 --> 00:11:37,199 Speaker 1: the police, not regular civilians. 267 00:11:38,320 --> 00:11:41,280 Speaker 3: There's levels to this ship, and I feel like people 268 00:11:41,440 --> 00:11:46,280 Speaker 3: black people specifically consider every goddamn thing. It'd be a 269 00:11:46,320 --> 00:11:49,160 Speaker 3: lot of situations that's not even I'm not saying that's 270 00:11:49,200 --> 00:11:51,520 Speaker 3: what it is, Tammy. I am saying this is what 271 00:11:51,880 --> 00:11:53,640 Speaker 3: people really think in the streets. 272 00:11:53,960 --> 00:11:56,040 Speaker 5: That's what I'm saying. I don't know, that's what I'm saying. 273 00:11:56,080 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 2: I don't believe. Absolutely not, Yeah, absolutely not. 274 00:12:00,080 --> 00:12:02,200 Speaker 3: But the example I gave, like you driving my car, 275 00:12:02,320 --> 00:12:05,000 Speaker 3: it's like I mean me driving your car, I'm saying 276 00:12:05,080 --> 00:12:07,880 Speaker 3: somebody would be. I'm only considering it snitching if you're 277 00:12:07,880 --> 00:12:09,920 Speaker 3: telling on some shit that don't have nothing to do 278 00:12:09,960 --> 00:12:10,559 Speaker 3: with your case. 279 00:12:11,200 --> 00:12:12,880 Speaker 2: Do you see what I'm saying? That snitching to me? 280 00:12:13,280 --> 00:12:15,319 Speaker 3: If you're just telling the police, telling the police some 281 00:12:15,360 --> 00:12:17,720 Speaker 3: shit to get a lesser charge. You just telling on 282 00:12:17,800 --> 00:12:19,800 Speaker 3: random niggas in the hood. They putting whoever picture in 283 00:12:19,840 --> 00:12:21,839 Speaker 3: front of you, and you say, yeah, that nigga does 284 00:12:21,880 --> 00:12:22,600 Speaker 3: such and such and such. 285 00:12:22,679 --> 00:12:25,600 Speaker 2: That is snitching to me. Anything else is not snitching. 286 00:12:25,880 --> 00:12:26,600 Speaker 5: Yeah, to me. 287 00:12:26,840 --> 00:12:29,480 Speaker 1: If you if you're committing a crime and you get caught, 288 00:12:29,600 --> 00:12:32,360 Speaker 1: you got caught, You got caught, Leave everybody else out 289 00:12:32,400 --> 00:12:32,560 Speaker 1: of it. 290 00:12:32,600 --> 00:12:33,280 Speaker 5: That's how I feel like. 291 00:12:33,520 --> 00:12:36,360 Speaker 1: Right, But if you just a civilian and you and 292 00:12:36,480 --> 00:12:40,560 Speaker 1: you in some bullshit, you have every right to defend yourself. 293 00:12:41,800 --> 00:12:44,439 Speaker 2: Absolutely. Yeah, we don't be doing crime. 294 00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:45,840 Speaker 5: I don't do shit. 295 00:12:49,440 --> 00:12:49,520 Speaker 6: All. 296 00:12:49,720 --> 00:12:52,320 Speaker 5: I might speed a little bit every now and then, 297 00:12:52,360 --> 00:12:53,559 Speaker 5: But that's the gist of it. 298 00:12:55,080 --> 00:12:57,640 Speaker 3: Girl, I gotta take you earlier this year. Man, and 299 00:12:57,880 --> 00:13:00,480 Speaker 3: I hide a lawyer. One thing I can like, why 300 00:13:00,520 --> 00:13:03,880 Speaker 3: do I get punished thirty times because your insurance go 301 00:13:04,000 --> 00:13:06,200 Speaker 3: up and everything else? I think it's not fair. It's 302 00:13:06,240 --> 00:13:11,000 Speaker 3: not fucking fair. No, So, Tyreese is on the Breakfast Club. 303 00:13:11,080 --> 00:13:13,360 Speaker 3: I know y'all seen that shit. Ty RaSE is on 304 00:13:13,400 --> 00:13:15,760 Speaker 3: the Breakfast Club. He was talking about his grievances. They 305 00:13:15,800 --> 00:13:20,200 Speaker 3: all were, right, Charlamagne dj Envy. They were talking about 306 00:13:20,240 --> 00:13:22,640 Speaker 3: their grievances with him. He was talking about his grievances 307 00:13:22,679 --> 00:13:25,319 Speaker 3: with them, Like you know, he basically wanted support from 308 00:13:25,320 --> 00:13:27,680 Speaker 3: his bros. When he was going through the things with 309 00:13:27,760 --> 00:13:30,000 Speaker 3: his ex wife. That divorce really hurt that nigga. 310 00:13:30,040 --> 00:13:30,680 Speaker 2: That's what I'm seeing. 311 00:13:31,440 --> 00:13:34,840 Speaker 3: But he leaves the Breakfast Club. They all apologize each other. 312 00:13:35,200 --> 00:13:38,240 Speaker 3: He apologized to them, they apologize to him. You know, 313 00:13:38,920 --> 00:13:42,040 Speaker 3: we thought the interview. I thought the interview was pretty amicable. 314 00:13:42,679 --> 00:13:46,080 Speaker 7: So whatever feelings you have about me and what I 315 00:13:46,200 --> 00:13:50,160 Speaker 7: should be or shouldn't be doing pertaining to my approach 316 00:13:50,600 --> 00:13:54,320 Speaker 7: with how I'm unraveling and bleeding out loud in the 317 00:13:54,320 --> 00:13:57,120 Speaker 7: middle of my thing, that would have actually been the 318 00:13:57,160 --> 00:13:58,560 Speaker 7: reason to call no. 319 00:13:58,880 --> 00:14:01,160 Speaker 8: And I did have conversations with you, and this is 320 00:14:01,160 --> 00:14:03,480 Speaker 8: from before your ex wife, when you were talking to 321 00:14:03,520 --> 00:14:06,760 Speaker 8: the girl overseas and who you were as a man, 322 00:14:07,280 --> 00:14:10,000 Speaker 8: I didn't respect that. I stuck took a step back 323 00:14:10,040 --> 00:14:12,319 Speaker 8: because I didn't know what you were going through and 324 00:14:12,400 --> 00:14:13,880 Speaker 8: I tried to talk to you, and I've seen who 325 00:14:13,920 --> 00:14:15,640 Speaker 8: you were and not even like who you were online, 326 00:14:15,840 --> 00:14:17,920 Speaker 8: and to my point, I tried, and when I seen 327 00:14:18,000 --> 00:14:20,000 Speaker 8: how you were talking this way, I said, I'm going 328 00:14:20,040 --> 00:14:20,840 Speaker 8: to take a step back. 329 00:14:21,240 --> 00:14:22,880 Speaker 7: How convenient I stepped back? 330 00:14:23,160 --> 00:14:23,640 Speaker 4: What you mean? 331 00:14:24,760 --> 00:14:25,880 Speaker 7: I never stepped back. 332 00:14:25,760 --> 00:14:28,560 Speaker 8: From you, It's right, but I never talked to your 333 00:14:28,560 --> 00:14:30,800 Speaker 8: wife in a disrespectful manner, and you talked to mine 334 00:14:30,800 --> 00:14:34,640 Speaker 8: and a disrespectful manner. And I never told nobody that 335 00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:36,840 Speaker 8: even when you were on and you could say you 336 00:14:36,840 --> 00:14:38,360 Speaker 8: were on those site mads and you could say that 337 00:14:38,440 --> 00:14:40,440 Speaker 8: you warrant you, but as a man, some of the 338 00:14:40,480 --> 00:14:42,560 Speaker 8: things that you said, Tyrese deserved me to box your 339 00:14:42,560 --> 00:14:43,200 Speaker 8: mouth and. 340 00:14:47,080 --> 00:14:48,920 Speaker 4: Know we were talking because this is something that I 341 00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:49,640 Speaker 4: never wanted to say. 342 00:14:49,680 --> 00:14:52,200 Speaker 8: And since he wants to be well, why envy, I'm 343 00:14:52,240 --> 00:14:55,240 Speaker 8: telling him why you said disrespectful ship to my wife. 344 00:14:55,680 --> 00:14:58,360 Speaker 3: A couple of days later, this nigga is crying on 345 00:14:58,360 --> 00:14:59,760 Speaker 3: the internet once again. 346 00:15:00,360 --> 00:15:05,840 Speaker 2: Okay, he's obviously trying to get another viral meme gradul 347 00:15:06,920 --> 00:15:08,120 Speaker 2: after this interview. 348 00:15:09,280 --> 00:15:12,640 Speaker 3: Yes, like he was the victim, like they really did 349 00:15:12,680 --> 00:15:14,360 Speaker 3: something to him at the breakfast club. 350 00:15:15,080 --> 00:15:18,240 Speaker 2: Yes, the other day, do you hear me? 351 00:15:18,480 --> 00:15:22,440 Speaker 3: I missed a point where I had to hit Charlamagne up, like, yo, 352 00:15:22,880 --> 00:15:23,080 Speaker 3: is he? 353 00:15:23,200 --> 00:15:26,560 Speaker 2: Well? Is this real? Like I was waiting for him. 354 00:15:27,520 --> 00:15:30,320 Speaker 3: I was waiting for him to say, got y'all just 355 00:15:30,600 --> 00:15:35,920 Speaker 3: practice him acting. I was waiting for that, but it 356 00:15:35,960 --> 00:15:39,479 Speaker 3: never happened. He was dead ass serious. He was thankful 357 00:15:39,560 --> 00:15:43,520 Speaker 3: to Jess hilarious. You know she's been co hosting a 358 00:15:43,520 --> 00:15:47,480 Speaker 3: lot up there. He was very like thankful to her 359 00:15:47,520 --> 00:15:49,760 Speaker 3: for like help standing up for him in his van 360 00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:53,080 Speaker 3: vulnerable moments and not making fun of him because they 361 00:15:53,080 --> 00:15:55,720 Speaker 3: felt like Charlamagne and dj Envy was making fun of 362 00:15:55,760 --> 00:15:58,720 Speaker 3: him what they do, but they were and he was 363 00:15:58,800 --> 00:16:01,560 Speaker 3: making fun too. Yeah, it was That's why like some 364 00:16:01,600 --> 00:16:04,520 Speaker 3: people like that, I can't. That's a dangerous person. 365 00:16:04,920 --> 00:16:06,840 Speaker 2: You can't. You don't know what to say around them. 366 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:08,040 Speaker 2: You don't know what she could do. 367 00:16:08,080 --> 00:16:09,520 Speaker 3: Like, I don't know how to act around you, so 368 00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:10,840 Speaker 3: I'd rather not be around you. 369 00:16:10,840 --> 00:16:11,360 Speaker 2: You know what I'm saying. 370 00:16:11,360 --> 00:16:14,400 Speaker 3: Because you were actively participating in all the bullshit and 371 00:16:14,400 --> 00:16:16,440 Speaker 3: then you leave and cry on the internet in front 372 00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:16,960 Speaker 3: of the world. 373 00:16:17,120 --> 00:16:21,640 Speaker 2: That is so shady. Yeah, that's a dangerous person. I 374 00:16:21,640 --> 00:16:22,720 Speaker 2: had a friend like that before. 375 00:16:23,280 --> 00:16:25,880 Speaker 3: Like, just because my jokes hit harder, bitch, that don't 376 00:16:25,920 --> 00:16:28,160 Speaker 3: mean you didn't joke on me first, right, just because 377 00:16:28,200 --> 00:16:28,840 Speaker 3: I come back with. 378 00:16:28,800 --> 00:16:32,160 Speaker 2: A one two one two. Now now you're crying. I know. 379 00:16:32,240 --> 00:16:34,000 Speaker 5: I had one of my homegirls. She had got a 380 00:16:34,040 --> 00:16:34,840 Speaker 5: hair transplant. 381 00:16:34,960 --> 00:16:37,360 Speaker 4: She had like this thing around her head, and she 382 00:16:37,480 --> 00:16:40,480 Speaker 4: had made some jokes about uh, I can't remember what. 383 00:16:40,720 --> 00:16:42,480 Speaker 4: I think it's because my edges was a little thing 384 00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:44,720 Speaker 4: on something right there. I was like, bitch, you look 385 00:16:44,800 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 4: like Frankistein because she had that shit tied around And 386 00:16:50,760 --> 00:16:53,120 Speaker 4: when I tell you she was big bad, I'm like, 387 00:16:53,160 --> 00:16:54,280 Speaker 4: how you gonna be mad? 388 00:16:56,000 --> 00:16:56,280 Speaker 3: Yeah? 389 00:16:56,440 --> 00:16:57,320 Speaker 2: Why you mad? Man? 390 00:16:57,720 --> 00:16:58,840 Speaker 4: Like I'm just joking. 391 00:16:58,920 --> 00:16:59,880 Speaker 5: You ain't Frankenstein. 392 00:17:00,040 --> 00:17:06,080 Speaker 2: You just look like, oh cry baby. 393 00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:07,879 Speaker 3: Sense of the math I can't stand a sense of 394 00:17:07,920 --> 00:17:13,080 Speaker 3: the maths person, if you'll get But anyway, y'all listen 395 00:17:13,119 --> 00:17:17,440 Speaker 3: today's guest. She's an author. She has a new book 396 00:17:17,440 --> 00:17:21,080 Speaker 3: coming out, or actually it's already released. It's called How 397 00:17:21,280 --> 00:17:27,120 Speaker 3: I Married a Big Amist. Y'all stay tuned. Position is yes, 398 00:17:27,119 --> 00:17:35,119 Speaker 3: it is. Hey, y'all, listen, we want to welcome today's guest. 399 00:17:35,680 --> 00:17:38,920 Speaker 3: She's a new author, just publishing her first book titled 400 00:17:39,200 --> 00:17:42,480 Speaker 3: How I'm Married a Big a misst Okay, this book, 401 00:17:42,640 --> 00:17:47,879 Speaker 3: this book explores love, loss and healing. Ultimately, we have 402 00:17:47,960 --> 00:17:51,080 Speaker 3: the amazingly resilient Bald. 403 00:17:50,680 --> 00:17:58,159 Speaker 2: And the beautiful Sean call we talked back today. Hey girl, Hey, 404 00:17:58,840 --> 00:17:59,480 Speaker 2: what's up? 405 00:18:00,280 --> 00:18:04,280 Speaker 1: Welcome to the show girl. We appreciate him. Yes, you 406 00:18:04,440 --> 00:18:05,960 Speaker 1: for inviting me, Thank you. 407 00:18:06,280 --> 00:18:07,960 Speaker 2: So we gotta just talk about it today. 408 00:18:08,480 --> 00:18:13,000 Speaker 4: Yeah, the title kinda tells you about basically the end 409 00:18:13,040 --> 00:18:18,200 Speaker 4: part because the bigg miss is my third husband, quote 410 00:18:18,280 --> 00:18:22,919 Speaker 4: unquote husband. So I've been married twice before. 411 00:18:22,640 --> 00:18:26,360 Speaker 6: Him, my first husband. I found out. 412 00:18:26,240 --> 00:18:29,000 Speaker 4: He was on the down low. He preferred the company 413 00:18:29,040 --> 00:18:29,520 Speaker 4: of men. 414 00:18:30,640 --> 00:18:31,320 Speaker 6: I was young. 415 00:18:31,400 --> 00:18:33,720 Speaker 4: I was in my twenties when I married him, about 416 00:18:33,800 --> 00:18:35,879 Speaker 4: twenty five. 417 00:18:35,720 --> 00:18:36,320 Speaker 6: Twenty six. 418 00:18:36,480 --> 00:18:41,080 Speaker 2: I feel stressed out, which we're gonna stop writing. I'm stressed. 419 00:18:42,800 --> 00:18:45,480 Speaker 3: I'm thinking, like, damn, she got three We can't get one. 420 00:18:45,600 --> 00:18:46,680 Speaker 3: But okay, now I. 421 00:18:46,600 --> 00:18:52,919 Speaker 4: See you need one quality exactly quality, not quantity. 422 00:18:54,080 --> 00:18:54,679 Speaker 6: So hold on. 423 00:18:56,280 --> 00:18:57,600 Speaker 5: He was a d L brother. 424 00:18:57,680 --> 00:18:58,840 Speaker 2: How did you find out? 425 00:19:00,119 --> 00:19:03,240 Speaker 6: Look? But okay, so I'll tell y'all. 426 00:19:04,600 --> 00:19:08,480 Speaker 4: I moved into his house, me and my two kids 427 00:19:08,520 --> 00:19:14,800 Speaker 4: at the time, and after a while, things just tension, arguing, 428 00:19:15,040 --> 00:19:18,080 Speaker 4: not getting along, and he left one day and never 429 00:19:18,160 --> 00:19:22,800 Speaker 4: came back. And I moved into his house, but he 430 00:19:22,880 --> 00:19:26,160 Speaker 4: stopped paying the mortgage, so it was like he got 431 00:19:26,160 --> 00:19:30,199 Speaker 4: out before they put us out. And one morning I 432 00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,879 Speaker 4: was like, you know how, You're like, there has to 433 00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:36,000 Speaker 4: be an answer in this house somewhere. So I went 434 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:39,280 Speaker 4: looking through stuff and he had this file cabinet that 435 00:19:39,400 --> 00:19:42,639 Speaker 4: I never went in, and I started going in that, 436 00:19:42,840 --> 00:19:45,760 Speaker 4: like what's in here? So back at that, I don't 437 00:19:45,800 --> 00:19:48,280 Speaker 4: know how old y'all are, But back in that day, 438 00:19:49,040 --> 00:19:56,560 Speaker 4: I'm bill came in the mail. 439 00:19:58,160 --> 00:20:00,600 Speaker 2: I don't know my mama was paying it at that time. 440 00:20:00,240 --> 00:20:01,840 Speaker 4: So I don't know right down to you. 441 00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:08,120 Speaker 6: Well, back then, your cell phone bill. 442 00:20:08,040 --> 00:20:10,720 Speaker 4: Came in the mail and it detailed all the calls 443 00:20:10,840 --> 00:20:14,600 Speaker 4: you made, the times you made them. So I'm looking 444 00:20:14,600 --> 00:20:18,160 Speaker 4: through the cell phone bill and there's nothing there at 445 00:20:18,200 --> 00:20:18,639 Speaker 4: the time. 446 00:20:18,880 --> 00:20:20,359 Speaker 6: So I, you know, I. 447 00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:23,959 Speaker 4: Go on about the next couple of days doing what 448 00:20:24,000 --> 00:20:26,360 Speaker 4: I have to do because I was actually pregnant with 449 00:20:26,400 --> 00:20:27,919 Speaker 4: his child at the time. 450 00:20:29,119 --> 00:20:31,160 Speaker 6: So I had to take care of that situation. 451 00:20:31,840 --> 00:20:33,959 Speaker 4: But then I still had this known feeling that I 452 00:20:34,040 --> 00:20:36,040 Speaker 4: was missing something, that something was here. 453 00:20:36,680 --> 00:20:38,600 Speaker 6: So I went back to that foul cabin. 454 00:20:38,640 --> 00:20:41,159 Speaker 4: And I don't know if y'all believe in messages or 455 00:20:41,240 --> 00:20:45,600 Speaker 4: divine into or things like that. So this particular day, 456 00:20:45,760 --> 00:20:49,119 Speaker 4: there was a page of the cell phone bill on 457 00:20:49,200 --> 00:20:53,440 Speaker 4: the floor and I was like, this was not here before. 458 00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:56,280 Speaker 4: I did not see this before. And when I looked 459 00:20:56,280 --> 00:20:59,159 Speaker 4: at it, there were some numbers on there. And you 460 00:20:59,240 --> 00:21:03,160 Speaker 4: know how now it's worse because everything's in your phone. 461 00:21:03,200 --> 00:21:06,320 Speaker 4: So you just tell Sieri or whoever to call whoever, 462 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:09,720 Speaker 4: or you just dial it. Like we don't memorize numbers 463 00:21:09,720 --> 00:21:12,320 Speaker 4: away we used. So I looked at this one particular 464 00:21:12,400 --> 00:21:14,720 Speaker 4: number and I'm like, I know this phone number. 465 00:21:14,760 --> 00:21:16,000 Speaker 6: I know this phone number. 466 00:21:16,440 --> 00:21:18,800 Speaker 4: And it was like one o'clock in the morning, and 467 00:21:18,880 --> 00:21:21,960 Speaker 4: I'm like, why would he be calling this number this time? 468 00:21:22,000 --> 00:21:23,840 Speaker 4: So I called the number and the person that I 469 00:21:23,920 --> 00:21:28,040 Speaker 4: thought would answer answered and it was my very very 470 00:21:28,400 --> 00:21:32,119 Speaker 4: good friend. So I don't know if y'all know anyone 471 00:21:32,160 --> 00:21:36,800 Speaker 4: from Baltimore. Baltimore was small, especially depending on the circle 472 00:21:36,960 --> 00:21:42,480 Speaker 4: you intertwined with. And when he answered, I said, I 473 00:21:42,480 --> 00:21:45,000 Speaker 4: said his name and he was like yeah, and I said, 474 00:21:45,080 --> 00:21:46,440 Speaker 4: do you know it's such and such. 475 00:21:47,480 --> 00:21:48,240 Speaker 6: I couldn't. 476 00:21:48,960 --> 00:21:51,359 Speaker 4: I didn't know if he knew his name or you know, 477 00:21:51,640 --> 00:21:54,240 Speaker 4: what the situation was. And he was like, no, who's 478 00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:57,920 Speaker 4: that And I was like my husband and I said, 479 00:21:57,960 --> 00:21:59,600 Speaker 4: He's like no, I don't think I know him. And 480 00:21:59,640 --> 00:22:02,640 Speaker 4: I said, your phone numbers on his cell phone bill 481 00:22:03,320 --> 00:22:06,320 Speaker 4: at like one o'clock in the morning. And my good 482 00:22:06,359 --> 00:22:08,960 Speaker 4: friend said to me, if he's calling me at that time, 483 00:22:09,080 --> 00:22:12,879 Speaker 4: it could only be for one thing. And I was 484 00:22:12,920 --> 00:22:15,439 Speaker 4: like oh, and he said do you have a picture 485 00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:17,480 Speaker 4: of him? And I said yeah, and he's like, I'll 486 00:22:17,480 --> 00:22:18,520 Speaker 4: come over and look at us. 487 00:22:18,520 --> 00:22:19,080 Speaker 6: Said okay. 488 00:22:19,480 --> 00:22:23,560 Speaker 4: He didn't come that day, and time went on, and 489 00:22:24,080 --> 00:22:26,919 Speaker 4: one day he called me because apparently the gossip in 490 00:22:26,960 --> 00:22:30,200 Speaker 4: this hair salon was me and this man. 491 00:22:31,080 --> 00:22:31,800 Speaker 6: So he called me. 492 00:22:31,920 --> 00:22:33,640 Speaker 4: He's like, you know, I'm sorry I didn't get over there, 493 00:22:33,680 --> 00:22:36,640 Speaker 4: but I'm coming today. Did you find a picture of him? 494 00:22:36,640 --> 00:22:40,040 Speaker 4: And I was like yeah, he came over. He looked 495 00:22:40,040 --> 00:22:43,000 Speaker 4: at the picture and he was like, yeah, I've been 496 00:22:43,040 --> 00:22:47,920 Speaker 4: with him. And I was like, been with him, been 497 00:22:47,960 --> 00:22:51,399 Speaker 4: with him, and he's like yeah. And it was like 498 00:22:51,720 --> 00:22:55,160 Speaker 4: a thing where you know, again, back in the day, 499 00:22:55,240 --> 00:22:57,720 Speaker 4: when you're driving, when you come to a light, you 500 00:22:57,800 --> 00:22:58,360 Speaker 4: like look. 501 00:22:58,200 --> 00:23:00,800 Speaker 6: Around, you, your mouth, with your surroundings. 502 00:23:00,840 --> 00:23:04,600 Speaker 4: Now we're on we're gonna TikTok Instagram, we're on social media. 503 00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:06,720 Speaker 4: We're all on our phones when we come to a 504 00:23:06,800 --> 00:23:07,560 Speaker 4: software light. 505 00:23:07,960 --> 00:23:10,239 Speaker 6: But back then, you know, you might glance at the 506 00:23:10,240 --> 00:23:11,200 Speaker 6: car next to you. 507 00:23:11,240 --> 00:23:14,480 Speaker 4: They glanced back, and y'all had that little virtual that 508 00:23:14,520 --> 00:23:15,320 Speaker 4: little eye. 509 00:23:15,119 --> 00:23:18,240 Speaker 6: Contact, and that's what happened with them. 510 00:23:18,640 --> 00:23:22,720 Speaker 4: And he followed him to his house and they were 511 00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:26,480 Speaker 4: they had sex, and this was before he met me. 512 00:23:27,080 --> 00:23:32,160 Speaker 4: But here's an interesting thing. So after that friend left, 513 00:23:32,200 --> 00:23:36,280 Speaker 4: I call another friend because you know, the community's small, 514 00:23:36,320 --> 00:23:40,560 Speaker 4: and I said, such and such knows him. Do you 515 00:23:40,680 --> 00:23:44,119 Speaker 4: know him? And I feel like a little silence. He 516 00:23:44,280 --> 00:23:47,879 Speaker 4: was like yeah, and I said, well, how do you 517 00:23:48,000 --> 00:23:52,520 Speaker 4: know him? And he said we used to date, talk whatever. 518 00:23:52,760 --> 00:23:55,280 Speaker 4: And I was like, okay, But this is the interesting 519 00:23:55,320 --> 00:23:56,439 Speaker 4: thing about this friend. 520 00:23:57,280 --> 00:24:02,640 Speaker 6: He actually met him, introduced them. He worked in the mall. 521 00:24:02,720 --> 00:24:05,800 Speaker 6: We went to the mall one day, my husband and 522 00:24:06,000 --> 00:24:08,359 Speaker 6: I and I said, come on in a store with me. 523 00:24:08,440 --> 00:24:11,400 Speaker 6: I want you to meet such and such and he 524 00:24:11,560 --> 00:24:13,520 Speaker 6: was like, no, I don't want to go in there, 525 00:24:14,280 --> 00:24:15,120 Speaker 6: and I'm like, why. 526 00:24:14,960 --> 00:24:17,200 Speaker 4: Not, you know, like, this is a really good friend 527 00:24:17,240 --> 00:24:18,719 Speaker 4: of mine. I want you to meet him. So at 528 00:24:18,720 --> 00:24:20,960 Speaker 4: the time I thought he was homophobica because he was like, 529 00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:21,640 Speaker 4: I don't want to. 530 00:24:21,600 --> 00:24:23,720 Speaker 6: Go in there. I'm not going in there. You go, 531 00:24:24,320 --> 00:24:25,440 Speaker 6: I'm not going in there. 532 00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:28,840 Speaker 4: Okay, back, So I said to myself, if I stay 533 00:24:28,840 --> 00:24:31,000 Speaker 4: in this store long enough, he's gonna have to come 534 00:24:31,040 --> 00:24:33,720 Speaker 4: in here to get me. Sure enough, I went in there, 535 00:24:33,760 --> 00:24:39,080 Speaker 4: I'm talking and he comes in the store and I 536 00:24:39,160 --> 00:24:42,240 Speaker 4: introduced them, like, hey, this is and this is and 537 00:24:42,280 --> 00:24:43,359 Speaker 4: they were like, what's up. 538 00:24:44,040 --> 00:24:47,800 Speaker 6: No indication they knew each other, none whatsoever. 539 00:24:47,920 --> 00:24:49,800 Speaker 4: So when I called him, I was like, did you 540 00:24:49,920 --> 00:24:52,080 Speaker 4: know him? He was like yeah, and you knew him 541 00:24:52,119 --> 00:24:55,120 Speaker 4: before I introduced y'all. And he's like yeah. 542 00:24:55,280 --> 00:24:59,480 Speaker 6: And I said, you never told me that you were intimate. 543 00:24:59,040 --> 00:25:02,800 Speaker 4: With the man was about to marry you. You just 544 00:25:02,920 --> 00:25:07,520 Speaker 4: let me marry us. They are who they are, and 545 00:25:07,600 --> 00:25:09,360 Speaker 4: you know, and I don't know if you know who 546 00:25:09,400 --> 00:25:11,880 Speaker 4: Elin Harris is because he wrote about this. 547 00:25:12,200 --> 00:25:16,080 Speaker 2: I read that. I read his books. They would say, 548 00:25:16,119 --> 00:25:17,920 Speaker 2: like the little I did waking in the eye. 549 00:25:18,000 --> 00:25:21,400 Speaker 5: That makes me think of that episode. 550 00:25:21,000 --> 00:25:23,439 Speaker 4: Of Martin where they was like, and who is your husband? 551 00:25:24,119 --> 00:25:25,639 Speaker 4: And then was trying to join their group, and she 552 00:25:25,760 --> 00:25:29,199 Speaker 4: was like, George, like everybody knew who your man was, 553 00:25:29,240 --> 00:25:34,679 Speaker 4: but you that like, so these people knew except the 554 00:25:34,760 --> 00:25:36,800 Speaker 4: friend that came over because he never. 555 00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:39,440 Speaker 6: Met him before. But I'm like, you know, what kind 556 00:25:39,480 --> 00:25:40,040 Speaker 6: of friend. 557 00:25:39,840 --> 00:25:43,760 Speaker 4: Are you to let me marry him? Knowing that he 558 00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:46,439 Speaker 4: lived this life I knew nothing about. 559 00:25:46,680 --> 00:25:49,240 Speaker 6: Yeah, double licks. He was like, well, he called me, 560 00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:50,199 Speaker 6: he asked me. 561 00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:53,280 Speaker 4: He told me, you know, not to tell you, he 562 00:25:53,680 --> 00:25:56,280 Speaker 4: tried to say when we started talking again, because of 563 00:25:56,280 --> 00:25:58,879 Speaker 4: course the friendship ended for me at that point. But 564 00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:01,960 Speaker 4: when we did recon years later, he said that he would. 565 00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:04,720 Speaker 4: He felt like he was afraid of him. He didn't 566 00:26:04,720 --> 00:26:06,880 Speaker 4: know who he knew, and he kind of threatened him 567 00:26:06,920 --> 00:26:08,600 Speaker 4: and all this and all that, and he said he 568 00:26:08,680 --> 00:26:11,480 Speaker 4: told him that, you know, he changed. He really loved me. 569 00:26:11,680 --> 00:26:16,800 Speaker 4: He wasn't in that lifestyle anymore. All that good stuff 570 00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:18,440 Speaker 4: he was delivered. 571 00:26:18,480 --> 00:26:21,880 Speaker 3: See do y'all think men can be actually delivered, right, 572 00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:25,040 Speaker 3: Like would you and like would you intentionally date somebody 573 00:26:25,080 --> 00:26:26,760 Speaker 3: knowing and they have been with a man before? 574 00:26:26,760 --> 00:26:28,919 Speaker 2: Because I would not. I wouldn't. 575 00:26:28,960 --> 00:26:34,840 Speaker 9: No, no, yeah, and even because I think they think 576 00:26:34,880 --> 00:26:36,960 Speaker 9: the concern is that, oh, you're gonna cheat on me 577 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:38,600 Speaker 9: with a man, but no, I just don't want a 578 00:26:38,640 --> 00:26:42,840 Speaker 9: man who even thinks about physical attraction. 579 00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:48,960 Speaker 6: Yeah. And my thing with that is, I how can. 580 00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:54,320 Speaker 4: You suppress your your attraction if you are attracted to 581 00:26:54,440 --> 00:26:55,080 Speaker 4: and see, this is. 582 00:26:55,080 --> 00:26:57,520 Speaker 6: The thing about that that life as well a lot 583 00:26:57,560 --> 00:26:58,120 Speaker 6: of men. 584 00:26:58,280 --> 00:27:00,359 Speaker 4: Because I used to go to you know, hang out 585 00:27:00,400 --> 00:27:02,239 Speaker 4: with my gay friends and go to the club and 586 00:27:02,280 --> 00:27:04,040 Speaker 4: I would see guys in there and I'd be like 587 00:27:05,280 --> 00:27:06,640 Speaker 4: you like, you know. 588 00:27:06,760 --> 00:27:10,280 Speaker 6: Like the thug hard dudes, and I'm like okay. 589 00:27:11,119 --> 00:27:13,520 Speaker 4: And they used to say, or they would feel like 590 00:27:14,320 --> 00:27:17,919 Speaker 4: if they were the. 591 00:27:16,680 --> 00:27:20,000 Speaker 6: Tops and not the bottoms, that they weren't gay. They 592 00:27:20,000 --> 00:27:23,440 Speaker 6: didn't consider themselves gay because they weren't being penetrated. They 593 00:27:23,480 --> 00:27:24,680 Speaker 6: were doing the penetration. 594 00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:31,000 Speaker 4: So for me, I'm like, it's now, if you you 595 00:27:31,080 --> 00:27:34,280 Speaker 4: got a woman that's ento aintal, that may satisfy you. 596 00:27:34,440 --> 00:27:37,880 Speaker 4: But if you have a physical attraction to a man 597 00:27:38,000 --> 00:27:43,480 Speaker 4: like if you are attracted to their body and just down, Yeah, 598 00:27:43,680 --> 00:27:46,520 Speaker 4: then I know that's not a lifestyle I want to partake. 599 00:27:46,560 --> 00:27:48,959 Speaker 6: And I know a lot of people, you know, they 600 00:27:49,280 --> 00:27:50,520 Speaker 6: talk about it in movies. 601 00:27:52,160 --> 00:27:56,040 Speaker 4: Candy and Todd just have something about not that lifestyle, 602 00:27:56,080 --> 00:28:00,199 Speaker 4: but just a different lifestyle. And I'm I'm no, that's 603 00:28:00,320 --> 00:28:03,480 Speaker 4: not me. And if I knew beforehand, I wouldn't have 604 00:28:03,520 --> 00:28:04,560 Speaker 4: married him. 605 00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:08,359 Speaker 3: I heard Baltimore was like Atlanta in that way, right, 606 00:28:08,840 --> 00:28:10,720 Speaker 3: and it's like a thing in Baltimore. 607 00:28:10,800 --> 00:28:13,440 Speaker 2: This is what I heard, I think from a credible source. 608 00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:15,800 Speaker 3: That was locked up with a lot of them that 609 00:28:15,960 --> 00:28:18,320 Speaker 3: said that it's like a thing in Baltimore to have 610 00:28:18,359 --> 00:28:22,320 Speaker 3: a bad bitch and a bad nigga. 611 00:28:22,600 --> 00:28:24,920 Speaker 2: I think, well, you know, Baltimore. 612 00:28:24,600 --> 00:28:26,840 Speaker 6: So close to d C, so d C. 613 00:28:27,480 --> 00:28:31,280 Speaker 4: Is like, that's to me, baby Atlanta when it comes 614 00:28:31,320 --> 00:28:34,119 Speaker 4: to that. But I think Baltimore so close to d 615 00:28:34,320 --> 00:28:36,760 Speaker 4: C that you may, you know, the Baltimore dudes may 616 00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:39,040 Speaker 4: trickle off into d C and do their business and 617 00:28:39,080 --> 00:28:40,960 Speaker 4: they want to come back home into Baltimore. 618 00:28:41,000 --> 00:28:43,960 Speaker 6: So I wouldn't be surprised, interesting, I wouldn't be like. 619 00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:46,440 Speaker 10: That. 620 00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:49,480 Speaker 2: You yes, taking care of everybody. 621 00:28:49,120 --> 00:28:49,920 Speaker 5: The o Mars. 622 00:28:50,600 --> 00:28:55,040 Speaker 6: Now, y'all didn't watch p Valley did? Yeah, we did, yeah, 623 00:28:55,400 --> 00:28:58,600 Speaker 6: because we didn't know about all that until after. 624 00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:01,360 Speaker 4: I got out of jail, and I was like, you 625 00:29:01,440 --> 00:29:04,880 Speaker 4: know that episode. I think everybody was like, wait, hold up, run. 626 00:29:04,880 --> 00:29:05,760 Speaker 2: This bad listen. 627 00:29:05,800 --> 00:29:09,960 Speaker 3: I stopped watching when uh he spit on his hand 628 00:29:10,080 --> 00:29:11,680 Speaker 3: like he had to still come out like when he 629 00:29:11,760 --> 00:29:14,240 Speaker 3: was looping old boy up in the office. 630 00:29:14,360 --> 00:29:19,200 Speaker 2: I was like, yeah, I'm good, you know. 631 00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:21,080 Speaker 11: That. 632 00:29:21,760 --> 00:29:25,360 Speaker 2: I was like, so you will watch it, you would 633 00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:30,280 Speaker 2: watch it, but you went like, I don't. 634 00:29:30,360 --> 00:29:30,840 Speaker 4: Yeah, I don't. 635 00:29:30,920 --> 00:29:32,920 Speaker 1: I don't watch Like I don't have no problem watching 636 00:29:32,880 --> 00:29:34,880 Speaker 1: and it is erotic for me a little bit, but 637 00:29:35,040 --> 00:29:38,240 Speaker 1: it's not something I will watch my minute. 638 00:29:39,920 --> 00:29:40,800 Speaker 4: I even like to. 639 00:29:41,840 --> 00:29:43,760 Speaker 1: I would even like to put ship like that on 640 00:29:43,840 --> 00:29:45,800 Speaker 1: with a guy when I'm getting to know him and 641 00:29:45,960 --> 00:29:48,960 Speaker 1: just see a little bit and then touches dick to see. 642 00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:52,280 Speaker 5: If this hard, Because it's hard. That's a problem. 643 00:29:52,840 --> 00:30:04,320 Speaker 2: That's entrapman, bitch, that's a trapman. How you did that? 644 00:30:05,000 --> 00:30:06,640 Speaker 6: You need to tell you. 645 00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:08,360 Speaker 1: No, because if your dick is getting hard watching too 646 00:30:08,400 --> 00:30:11,000 Speaker 1: many like you need to unpack that, but not over 647 00:30:11,040 --> 00:30:12,120 Speaker 1: here somewhere else. 648 00:30:15,600 --> 00:30:20,440 Speaker 2: Yeah, Okay, So you move on, you leave him. 649 00:30:20,640 --> 00:30:25,760 Speaker 4: Marriage to marriage to now marriage to that was a 650 00:30:25,760 --> 00:30:30,240 Speaker 4: different journey. So with again, I had two kids, got married, 651 00:30:30,280 --> 00:30:32,800 Speaker 4: he had none. He wanted at least one. I thought 652 00:30:32,800 --> 00:30:35,160 Speaker 4: it was my wife, we duty to give him a child. 653 00:30:35,720 --> 00:30:39,280 Speaker 4: We tried for about two years and nothing happened. Went 654 00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:43,200 Speaker 4: to the doctor low and behold, he can't really produce 655 00:30:43,360 --> 00:30:46,040 Speaker 4: children in a natural way. So then that marriage took 656 00:30:46,080 --> 00:30:51,360 Speaker 4: me on a fertility journey of inter uterine insemination and 657 00:30:51,400 --> 00:30:56,520 Speaker 4: then lastly IVF, which that was in itself because you 658 00:30:56,560 --> 00:31:00,040 Speaker 4: have to give yourself all these medications and gestions and 659 00:31:00,040 --> 00:31:00,480 Speaker 4: and something. 660 00:31:00,600 --> 00:31:05,280 Speaker 6: You have to take all these tests. It's expensive. So 661 00:31:05,480 --> 00:31:07,400 Speaker 6: we were so blessed that he worked for. 662 00:31:07,360 --> 00:31:09,760 Speaker 4: The state of Maryland and our insurance covered at one 663 00:31:09,840 --> 00:31:12,120 Speaker 4: hundred percent, like we would have, you know, the regular 664 00:31:12,160 --> 00:31:16,080 Speaker 4: cope here and there, but they covered the first three 665 00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:20,200 Speaker 4: rounds of IUI, the antuterin assemination, and then three rounds 666 00:31:20,280 --> 00:31:23,280 Speaker 4: of IVF. So I did two rounds of IUI, and 667 00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:25,560 Speaker 4: when that didn't work out, was like, okay, let's move 668 00:31:25,600 --> 00:31:30,200 Speaker 4: on to IVF. And the first round was horrific, Like 669 00:31:31,000 --> 00:31:36,160 Speaker 4: my medication overstimulated me so bad that I looked like 670 00:31:36,200 --> 00:31:38,800 Speaker 4: I was eight months pregnant just from fluid builds up, 671 00:31:38,840 --> 00:31:42,120 Speaker 4: because you know, when you're about to ovulate, your egg 672 00:31:42,240 --> 00:31:44,800 Speaker 4: gets like fluid around it, like it's in a little sack. 673 00:31:45,320 --> 00:31:50,480 Speaker 4: So imagine you had thirty eggs that are ready to drop, 674 00:31:51,000 --> 00:31:54,040 Speaker 4: and so you overstimulate and you're holding all that fluid 675 00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:55,720 Speaker 4: and I was so uncomfortable. 676 00:31:55,800 --> 00:31:57,960 Speaker 6: I was nauseous. I couldn't keep anything down. 677 00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:01,720 Speaker 4: Ultimately I ended up in a hospital for seven days 678 00:32:02,200 --> 00:32:03,640 Speaker 4: because it was that bad. 679 00:32:04,640 --> 00:32:06,560 Speaker 3: I don't understand why you would have to go through 680 00:32:06,640 --> 00:32:09,600 Speaker 3: fertility treatment right with the issue. Wouldn't they be able 681 00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:13,160 Speaker 3: to because I know so what I not that that 682 00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:16,960 Speaker 3: naas not anyways, wouldn't they be able to retrieve some 683 00:32:17,080 --> 00:32:19,840 Speaker 3: sperm from them to inserting you like, just do straight 684 00:32:19,880 --> 00:32:21,160 Speaker 3: to IVF right. 685 00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:24,280 Speaker 6: So that so that is what they do with both 686 00:32:24,320 --> 00:32:24,600 Speaker 6: of them. 687 00:32:24,640 --> 00:32:28,320 Speaker 4: So with Iuy, they take his sperm and they take 688 00:32:28,400 --> 00:32:32,200 Speaker 4: the good ones and they inciminate you and then you're like, okay, 689 00:32:32,320 --> 00:32:35,800 Speaker 4: let's see how that works. And that didn't work because 690 00:32:35,960 --> 00:32:39,800 Speaker 4: I guess there weren't as many good sperm as there were. 691 00:32:41,000 --> 00:32:42,960 Speaker 6: No I don't want to say bad sperm. 692 00:32:42,600 --> 00:32:45,760 Speaker 4: But non good sperm, bad firm so with the IVF, 693 00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:47,640 Speaker 4: they kind of do the same thing. They take the 694 00:32:47,680 --> 00:32:52,800 Speaker 4: best of the best and they inciminate each egg and 695 00:32:52,840 --> 00:32:56,120 Speaker 4: then from there they watch it and they see which 696 00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:59,120 Speaker 4: ones develop the best, and then those they put back 697 00:32:59,240 --> 00:33:02,320 Speaker 4: into you. So for us, they put two in, and 698 00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:04,800 Speaker 4: the first time, because it was a frozen cycle, so 699 00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:06,960 Speaker 4: I got so sick, they couldn't put them back in 700 00:33:07,080 --> 00:33:09,720 Speaker 4: right away, so they froze them. And then when I 701 00:33:09,760 --> 00:33:13,640 Speaker 4: got better, they used those and they didn't work. So 702 00:33:13,680 --> 00:33:17,480 Speaker 4: then I was like, Okay, I'll do this one last time. 703 00:33:18,880 --> 00:33:19,000 Speaker 10: Hm. 704 00:33:19,600 --> 00:33:22,880 Speaker 3: The thawing out process of the egg could kill the egg, Yeah, 705 00:33:23,000 --> 00:33:23,640 Speaker 3: kill them. 706 00:33:24,040 --> 00:33:28,760 Speaker 4: Yes, I guess if they're not as strong, they wouldn't 707 00:33:28,800 --> 00:33:32,080 Speaker 4: survive anyway, but it could be. It's better to do 708 00:33:32,200 --> 00:33:36,000 Speaker 4: a fresh cycle where they're not frozen, because your body 709 00:33:36,000 --> 00:33:39,520 Speaker 4: may take those better. And that's what happened the second 710 00:33:39,560 --> 00:33:42,920 Speaker 4: time when we decided to do it again, it was 711 00:33:42,960 --> 00:33:46,440 Speaker 4: a fresh cycle. I didn't overstimulate as bad, so they 712 00:33:46,440 --> 00:33:49,920 Speaker 4: were able to continue and just do the retrieval put 713 00:33:49,920 --> 00:33:52,480 Speaker 4: them back after they took them out. And for me 714 00:33:52,720 --> 00:33:55,280 Speaker 4: that marriage, I just had the expectation and if I 715 00:33:55,320 --> 00:33:57,440 Speaker 4: did all this hard work for this man, that he 716 00:33:57,640 --> 00:33:59,520 Speaker 4: was going to be like the best father and the 717 00:33:59,560 --> 00:34:03,920 Speaker 4: best and he wasn't. He wasn't terrible, but he wasn't 718 00:34:03,960 --> 00:34:06,200 Speaker 4: as helpful like I thought. He would be excited and 719 00:34:06,280 --> 00:34:08,040 Speaker 4: when the baby woke up in the middle of the night, 720 00:34:08,080 --> 00:34:10,520 Speaker 4: he'd be right there to change diapers and get milk 721 00:34:10,560 --> 00:34:10,960 Speaker 4: and all that. 722 00:34:11,640 --> 00:34:12,879 Speaker 6: Nah, he'd be sleep and. 723 00:34:12,840 --> 00:34:15,319 Speaker 4: I would have to wake like listen, you're either gonna 724 00:34:15,360 --> 00:34:18,439 Speaker 4: get the pamp or you're gonna get the bottle, which 725 00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:21,720 Speaker 4: one is it? And he'll like like he'd the baby 726 00:34:21,760 --> 00:34:24,800 Speaker 4: be crying, he would be snoring. He wouldn't hear nothing. 727 00:34:25,280 --> 00:34:26,880 Speaker 4: And after a while, I was like, you know, I 728 00:34:26,920 --> 00:34:30,040 Speaker 4: gave you a child that you wanted and I'm doing 729 00:34:30,080 --> 00:34:31,200 Speaker 4: everything by myself. 730 00:34:31,360 --> 00:34:33,640 Speaker 3: I was like, oh, is that his first child? Yes, 731 00:34:34,600 --> 00:34:36,719 Speaker 3: so he didn't. So I think that because one of 732 00:34:36,760 --> 00:34:37,080 Speaker 3: my friends. 733 00:34:37,440 --> 00:34:39,680 Speaker 6: Here you go, you're gonna say he knew he had. 734 00:34:39,840 --> 00:34:43,279 Speaker 3: Here you go go, No, No, I'm just saying, like 735 00:34:44,280 --> 00:34:47,120 Speaker 3: I think some men assume like that's just the mom's job, Like, no, 736 00:34:47,200 --> 00:34:47,879 Speaker 3: you gotta help. 737 00:34:48,440 --> 00:34:49,439 Speaker 2: You have to help with that. 738 00:34:49,800 --> 00:34:51,000 Speaker 6: Right, Yeah. 739 00:34:51,040 --> 00:34:53,439 Speaker 4: Well even when you tell them like you need to help, 740 00:34:53,560 --> 00:34:57,680 Speaker 4: like you know, this is our child together, and the 741 00:34:57,800 --> 00:34:59,600 Speaker 4: help still doesn't come, it's like. 742 00:35:01,080 --> 00:35:01,840 Speaker 6: And then there were. 743 00:35:01,719 --> 00:35:04,960 Speaker 4: Other issues too, like communication and I don't know if 744 00:35:05,800 --> 00:35:09,000 Speaker 4: how much off all things that go on up here, 745 00:35:09,040 --> 00:35:12,280 Speaker 4: but a few years ago and he's a correctional officer, 746 00:35:12,320 --> 00:35:14,719 Speaker 4: and a few years ago there was this whole jail 747 00:35:14,960 --> 00:35:19,840 Speaker 4: mafia thing and he was co mingling with one of 748 00:35:19,840 --> 00:35:20,719 Speaker 4: the officers. 749 00:35:20,800 --> 00:35:22,880 Speaker 6: So he said he wasn't, but I think he was. 750 00:35:22,960 --> 00:35:24,920 Speaker 4: And I'm like, I better not find out that you 751 00:35:25,560 --> 00:35:29,279 Speaker 4: intertwine in this little in house jail crew that's you know, 752 00:35:29,640 --> 00:35:33,480 Speaker 4: about to be investigated. And it just seemed like it 753 00:35:33,520 --> 00:35:37,200 Speaker 4: was downhill from from their communication was off. 754 00:35:37,719 --> 00:35:40,479 Speaker 6: He's the type of person that, although y'all are married, 755 00:35:40,520 --> 00:35:44,360 Speaker 6: he has his business, his personal business that he doesn't 756 00:35:44,360 --> 00:35:46,680 Speaker 6: want to share with you. I'm like, I can't be. 757 00:35:46,680 --> 00:35:50,400 Speaker 4: Married to somebody that has, you know, their little secrets 758 00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:53,600 Speaker 4: in their own life. And here I gave you a 759 00:35:53,680 --> 00:35:57,200 Speaker 4: child and you're still acting like we're roommates and all that. 760 00:35:58,960 --> 00:36:01,200 Speaker 3: So now we're three is in because you I guess 761 00:36:01,239 --> 00:36:04,319 Speaker 3: I'm assuming ultimately you didn't have the baby for the 762 00:36:04,400 --> 00:36:07,960 Speaker 3: first Okay, So now we're three kids and two husbands 763 00:36:07,960 --> 00:36:14,000 Speaker 3: in three Yes, we got the worst type of nas okay. 764 00:36:14,520 --> 00:36:17,360 Speaker 3: Second one, he just was an adult. He wasn't an adult. 765 00:36:17,360 --> 00:36:19,800 Speaker 3: He didn't know he didn't know what marriage was exactly 766 00:36:19,840 --> 00:36:20,719 Speaker 3: what it sounds like to me. 767 00:36:21,640 --> 00:36:26,160 Speaker 4: All right, the youngest child, he was home the longest, 768 00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:30,080 Speaker 4: you know, first child, and was forty Yeah, yeah. 769 00:36:30,040 --> 00:36:35,279 Speaker 6: That's yeah, and to take care of him chat yes, Like. 770 00:36:36,520 --> 00:36:38,560 Speaker 4: I remember one time he came home from working. He 771 00:36:38,640 --> 00:36:40,520 Speaker 4: was like, you didn't cook and I was like, it's 772 00:36:40,600 --> 00:36:41,440 Speaker 4: leftovers in there. 773 00:36:41,520 --> 00:36:45,320 Speaker 6: He was like, I don't eat leftover. So I was like, oh, okay. 774 00:36:45,880 --> 00:36:47,239 Speaker 6: So I was talking to his mother. 775 00:36:47,400 --> 00:36:48,600 Speaker 2: She was like, well, he used. 776 00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:49,960 Speaker 6: To eat leftovers over here. 777 00:36:50,000 --> 00:36:51,719 Speaker 4: I said, why, I guess he think over he was 778 00:36:51,760 --> 00:36:54,000 Speaker 4: supposed to cook a hot meal for him every day. 779 00:36:54,040 --> 00:36:56,280 Speaker 6: Well, there are some cereal in there as well. 780 00:36:57,920 --> 00:37:02,920 Speaker 3: No, and when you take two slices of blow up 781 00:37:02,920 --> 00:37:05,080 Speaker 3: between the real quick that's my daddy used to tell us. 782 00:37:05,080 --> 00:37:07,400 Speaker 3: If you think you're gonna be hungry, eat sandwiches and 783 00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:08,480 Speaker 3: water and go to sleep. 784 00:37:08,680 --> 00:37:09,399 Speaker 2: Nigga what. 785 00:37:10,600 --> 00:37:13,080 Speaker 3: That's why I feeled about these bitches online talking about 786 00:37:13,080 --> 00:37:15,120 Speaker 3: they getting up three o'clock and my man wanted me 787 00:37:15,239 --> 00:37:17,399 Speaker 3: up two o'clock in the morning. Listen, you might wake 788 00:37:17,440 --> 00:37:19,400 Speaker 3: me up for some quick sex from the side, but 789 00:37:19,440 --> 00:37:21,560 Speaker 3: you better not wake me up the cook. No goddamn 790 00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:25,120 Speaker 3: scramble eggs, nigga unless they both drunk coming in from 791 00:37:25,120 --> 00:37:25,920 Speaker 3: the club together. 792 00:37:26,640 --> 00:37:29,560 Speaker 6: Now, if I didn't work, okay, now it depends. 793 00:37:29,760 --> 00:37:32,919 Speaker 4: Yeah, if I didn't have to work to work and 794 00:37:33,239 --> 00:37:36,880 Speaker 4: he didn't, you know, check all I spent and I 795 00:37:36,920 --> 00:37:39,680 Speaker 4: didn't have to say, listen, I want these new shoes. 796 00:37:39,800 --> 00:37:44,759 Speaker 6: And if it was not the marriage I wanted, I 797 00:37:44,760 --> 00:37:47,240 Speaker 6: wouldn't mind. But if I'm. 798 00:37:47,080 --> 00:37:50,399 Speaker 4: Working, take cooking, clean and doing everything, and you think 799 00:37:50,400 --> 00:37:51,359 Speaker 4: you're supposed to go to. 800 00:37:51,360 --> 00:37:54,600 Speaker 6: Work, I take out the trash as well. 801 00:37:54,640 --> 00:37:56,400 Speaker 4: Like you just go to work and come home, go 802 00:37:56,440 --> 00:37:57,239 Speaker 4: to work and come home. 803 00:37:57,640 --> 00:37:58,520 Speaker 6: That doesn't work for me. 804 00:38:00,400 --> 00:38:03,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, get to work for you, the kids, the house, 805 00:38:03,840 --> 00:38:05,400 Speaker 3: but you just to go. You go to work and 806 00:38:05,400 --> 00:38:07,239 Speaker 3: work for the white man and come home and come 807 00:38:07,239 --> 00:38:08,879 Speaker 3: home and. 808 00:38:08,880 --> 00:38:11,080 Speaker 4: You go right to the kitchen and you're like, where's 809 00:38:11,120 --> 00:38:12,280 Speaker 4: my where's my dinner? 810 00:38:12,800 --> 00:38:15,040 Speaker 6: You could have brought the dinner home where you was 811 00:38:15,080 --> 00:38:16,120 Speaker 6: on your way home. 812 00:38:16,400 --> 00:38:18,080 Speaker 5: Sorry, I agree. 813 00:38:19,400 --> 00:38:21,880 Speaker 6: Now, let's not get twisted, because I don't want. 814 00:38:21,760 --> 00:38:23,600 Speaker 4: The people listening and be like, oh no one did 815 00:38:23,600 --> 00:38:26,400 Speaker 4: she had the many husband's knowledge I cook. I'm just 816 00:38:26,440 --> 00:38:31,359 Speaker 4: not cooking every day. I'm not doing it all by myself. 817 00:38:32,120 --> 00:38:36,400 Speaker 3: Right, he could cook some days or take how to cook? 818 00:38:36,800 --> 00:38:39,479 Speaker 2: Yeah, right, like outsos you. 819 00:38:39,440 --> 00:38:42,080 Speaker 4: Have your night off tonight, honey, I'll bring dinner home 820 00:38:42,200 --> 00:38:44,400 Speaker 4: or order what you want whatever. 821 00:38:44,760 --> 00:38:47,040 Speaker 5: Door he ain't even gotta go get it. 822 00:38:47,160 --> 00:38:53,680 Speaker 6: Yeah, they ain't have door dash. I'll be forty nine. 823 00:38:54,400 --> 00:38:55,480 Speaker 6: I'll be forty. 824 00:38:55,239 --> 00:39:02,880 Speaker 2: Nine doing that. We was riding Dick and Jane and 825 00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:04,200 Speaker 2: cooking by the candlelight. 826 00:39:07,040 --> 00:39:10,040 Speaker 6: Where that damn old Now where that? 827 00:39:12,480 --> 00:39:18,560 Speaker 4: Yeah, that's not He came bump at the water from 828 00:39:18,600 --> 00:39:19,200 Speaker 4: the wells. 829 00:39:21,360 --> 00:39:23,640 Speaker 6: They still do that today, depending on where they live at. 830 00:39:23,680 --> 00:39:26,960 Speaker 3: Now you're right, I wear it's a well water because 831 00:39:26,960 --> 00:39:28,879 Speaker 3: we don't know what the hell is in the current water, 832 00:39:29,600 --> 00:39:29,920 Speaker 3: you know. 833 00:39:30,360 --> 00:39:33,960 Speaker 4: Drawing out your damn hand whatnot. So yeah, then then 834 00:39:34,440 --> 00:39:36,480 Speaker 4: I saw at that time, I was like, you know what, 835 00:39:36,600 --> 00:39:39,880 Speaker 4: I'm a single mama, three kids. I want something different, 836 00:39:39,960 --> 00:39:41,400 Speaker 4: I want something something better. 837 00:39:41,480 --> 00:39:43,120 Speaker 6: So then I moved to Charlotte. 838 00:39:44,160 --> 00:39:50,560 Speaker 4: Oh ship, I went from the frying pan into the fire. Yes, 839 00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:53,759 Speaker 4: So I got to Charlotte and I got saddled. 840 00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:57,560 Speaker 6: I started dating and I met. 841 00:39:58,160 --> 00:39:58,760 Speaker 2: One person. 842 00:39:58,880 --> 00:39:59,720 Speaker 6: I am married. 843 00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:03,399 Speaker 4: You now So at the time, Madam, we go through 844 00:40:03,440 --> 00:40:07,359 Speaker 4: our thing. We date, we lived together, we go through 845 00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:12,040 Speaker 4: some infers, some infidelity issues, and I'm like, you know what, I'm. 846 00:40:11,920 --> 00:40:14,920 Speaker 6: Sick of your ass. I'm out of here, packed up. 847 00:40:15,040 --> 00:40:18,359 Speaker 4: Moved back to Baltimore, had a good time for two 848 00:40:18,400 --> 00:40:21,560 Speaker 4: and a half years, dating and being single again, and 849 00:40:21,640 --> 00:40:24,320 Speaker 4: you know, getting back into the group of my people 850 00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:26,360 Speaker 4: and being around my friends. 851 00:40:25,960 --> 00:40:27,160 Speaker 6: And my family again. 852 00:40:27,840 --> 00:40:30,080 Speaker 4: And then he comes back and he's like, I've missed 853 00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:32,560 Speaker 4: you so much. I realized what I had when I 854 00:40:32,680 --> 00:40:35,840 Speaker 4: lost you. I just want I've changed, I want to 855 00:40:35,880 --> 00:40:38,000 Speaker 4: do bad, I want to provide for you, all this 856 00:40:38,120 --> 00:40:38,520 Speaker 4: and all that. 857 00:40:39,440 --> 00:40:43,040 Speaker 6: So that said, okay, cool, We start dating again and 858 00:40:43,040 --> 00:40:46,920 Speaker 6: we get engaged, we get married. Not long after we 859 00:40:46,960 --> 00:40:48,120 Speaker 6: got married. 860 00:40:48,480 --> 00:40:51,279 Speaker 4: These little signs come back, and I'm like, I know, 861 00:40:51,560 --> 00:40:54,920 Speaker 4: after being apart artist time, you don't come back to 862 00:40:55,000 --> 00:40:58,239 Speaker 4: do the same shit you did when I left you 863 00:40:58,800 --> 00:40:59,560 Speaker 4: the last time. 864 00:41:01,160 --> 00:41:04,040 Speaker 6: So no, no, no, I just flirt. This just flirt. 865 00:41:04,080 --> 00:41:06,279 Speaker 6: I've never cheated on you. I'll never cheat on you. 866 00:41:06,360 --> 00:41:09,960 Speaker 4: Okay, Fine, we move forward. We buy a house and 867 00:41:10,120 --> 00:41:15,520 Speaker 4: your Pennsylvania, get a dog, all the house stuff, you know, 868 00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:18,560 Speaker 4: white picking fence, all that good stuff. 869 00:41:20,760 --> 00:41:22,319 Speaker 6: And then in March. 870 00:41:24,000 --> 00:41:27,040 Speaker 4: I see a document in his email and drafts and 871 00:41:27,080 --> 00:41:28,799 Speaker 4: it's from an attorney's office and. 872 00:41:28,680 --> 00:41:31,840 Speaker 6: It said, you know, hey, mister such and such, we're 873 00:41:31,880 --> 00:41:35,600 Speaker 6: the attorney for missing such and such and we need 874 00:41:35,640 --> 00:41:38,080 Speaker 6: this paperwork filled out to send to the judge to 875 00:41:38,200 --> 00:41:42,719 Speaker 6: sign with the divorce decree. I'm like, the divorce de crew, like, 876 00:41:42,760 --> 00:41:43,160 Speaker 6: why are. 877 00:41:43,040 --> 00:41:45,640 Speaker 4: They sending him this now, Midria? At this time, I've 878 00:41:45,640 --> 00:41:46,440 Speaker 4: known this man. 879 00:41:46,280 --> 00:41:50,200 Speaker 6: For eight years. I'm like, why they sending in him 880 00:41:50,800 --> 00:41:55,000 Speaker 6: paperwork for divorce decree? Years later? So I look at 881 00:41:55,120 --> 00:41:58,320 Speaker 6: its listed the date of marriage and the date of divorce, 882 00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:00,240 Speaker 6: and at the time I've read it, I was like, Okay, 883 00:42:00,360 --> 00:42:03,040 Speaker 6: it didn't click. It didn't register in the brain. 884 00:42:02,800 --> 00:42:06,000 Speaker 4: Because you know, sometimes your eyes and your brain are 885 00:42:06,280 --> 00:42:09,799 Speaker 4: not on the same page. So I go about my 886 00:42:10,000 --> 00:42:12,319 Speaker 4: day and then later on I'm in a shower where 887 00:42:12,320 --> 00:42:14,680 Speaker 4: I do my best thinking, and. 888 00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:17,160 Speaker 6: I play out my day in my mind, and then 889 00:42:17,280 --> 00:42:19,680 Speaker 6: something said, Mitch, did you pay attention. 890 00:42:22,520 --> 00:42:24,760 Speaker 2: Right? You're not paying. 891 00:42:24,560 --> 00:42:27,640 Speaker 6: Attention girl, So I hurry up. I'm like, oh my god, 892 00:42:27,800 --> 00:42:28,120 Speaker 6: I don't. 893 00:42:28,160 --> 00:42:29,640 Speaker 4: I don't think I saw what I think I saw, 894 00:42:29,680 --> 00:42:33,000 Speaker 4: and took my shower because I downloaded the document to 895 00:42:33,080 --> 00:42:35,080 Speaker 4: my phone, so when I got the shower, looked it up. 896 00:42:35,120 --> 00:42:38,400 Speaker 4: There's sure enough, I said. This man got divorced. His 897 00:42:38,520 --> 00:42:42,239 Speaker 4: divorce was final two months after we got married. But 898 00:42:42,280 --> 00:42:45,240 Speaker 4: the kicker and the killer for me was I've known 899 00:42:45,320 --> 00:42:49,439 Speaker 4: you all this time. I referred to her as your 900 00:42:49,520 --> 00:42:53,760 Speaker 4: ex wife when I talk to you about her or anyone, 901 00:42:53,800 --> 00:42:56,520 Speaker 4: and I mentioned, oh, your ex wife, your ex wife. 902 00:42:56,640 --> 00:42:59,040 Speaker 4: Not once did this man can direct me and say, well, 903 00:42:59,120 --> 00:43:02,680 Speaker 4: I'm still married. You allowed me because we didn't go 904 00:43:02,760 --> 00:43:04,120 Speaker 4: to the courthouse and get married. 905 00:43:04,160 --> 00:43:08,759 Speaker 6: We had a wedding at midnight on New Year's Eve 906 00:43:10,040 --> 00:43:13,160 Speaker 6: in winter, dressed in black. 907 00:43:13,600 --> 00:43:17,360 Speaker 4: The guests wore black gowns and tucks and you. 908 00:43:17,239 --> 00:43:19,680 Speaker 6: Know, came out at that house. 909 00:43:20,040 --> 00:43:24,759 Speaker 4: It was very for a very good party technically what 910 00:43:24,880 --> 00:43:27,040 Speaker 4: it turned out to be because you can't call it 911 00:43:27,120 --> 00:43:30,120 Speaker 4: a wedding reception because you can't be married to people 912 00:43:30,200 --> 00:43:34,280 Speaker 4: at the same time. Well in some states you can't 913 00:43:34,280 --> 00:43:39,520 Speaker 4: be right and yeah, it was like you know how 914 00:43:39,560 --> 00:43:42,680 Speaker 4: it's and we as women. When I found out, my 915 00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:48,359 Speaker 4: first thought was embarrassment, like you feel like, how did 916 00:43:48,400 --> 00:43:52,920 Speaker 4: I let this nigga do this to me again? Like 917 00:43:53,160 --> 00:43:57,120 Speaker 4: I gave you the chance to do this to me again. 918 00:43:57,400 --> 00:44:01,160 Speaker 4: So basically I didn't learn anything the first go around. 919 00:44:01,840 --> 00:44:04,839 Speaker 4: So I self isolated, Like I stopped hanging out with 920 00:44:04,880 --> 00:44:07,560 Speaker 4: my friends. I stopped going anywhere. I would, you know, 921 00:44:07,640 --> 00:44:09,319 Speaker 4: every now and then I would have people at my house. 922 00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:12,040 Speaker 4: I had brunching. All that was my friends. I stopped 923 00:44:12,120 --> 00:44:14,919 Speaker 4: doing all that. They would check on me, and then you. 924 00:44:14,800 --> 00:44:16,560 Speaker 6: Know, you're like, oh, I'm a good girl. How you 925 00:44:16,640 --> 00:44:17,440 Speaker 6: doing when you're not? 926 00:44:18,080 --> 00:44:21,719 Speaker 4: I fell into this depression and my therapist was like, 927 00:44:21,800 --> 00:44:23,719 Speaker 4: you need to get that out and get out your 928 00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:27,200 Speaker 4: mind and get it on paper. And one day I said, 929 00:44:27,200 --> 00:44:29,920 Speaker 4: you know, I'm gonna write a book. And funny thing 930 00:44:30,000 --> 00:44:31,840 Speaker 4: is I was talking to one of his sisters and 931 00:44:32,120 --> 00:44:34,120 Speaker 4: I said, I should profit off my pain. I can't 932 00:44:34,120 --> 00:44:36,920 Speaker 4: believe he put me through orders. And she said, you should, 933 00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:39,279 Speaker 4: You should write a booking profit. 934 00:44:39,000 --> 00:44:39,360 Speaker 6: Off of it. 935 00:44:39,360 --> 00:44:41,760 Speaker 4: And I said, you know, one girl, I am thanks 936 00:44:41,800 --> 00:44:45,080 Speaker 4: for the encouragement. It was just your brother, but thanks 937 00:44:45,080 --> 00:44:50,680 Speaker 4: for that. And I wrote my book in thirty days 938 00:44:51,080 --> 00:44:53,360 Speaker 4: off of pure emotion. 939 00:44:55,440 --> 00:44:58,120 Speaker 3: And you said, that's who you're married to still right now? 940 00:44:59,440 --> 00:45:02,080 Speaker 3: Are y'all like actively together in. 941 00:45:02,040 --> 00:45:05,960 Speaker 6: The same house? So there are right. 942 00:45:05,840 --> 00:45:12,000 Speaker 2: Now at works and. 943 00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:18,719 Speaker 4: So the same house. But so y'all amicable or what 944 00:45:18,800 --> 00:45:19,040 Speaker 4: is it? 945 00:45:19,120 --> 00:45:19,200 Speaker 2: Like? 946 00:45:19,960 --> 00:45:22,799 Speaker 4: He has you know, he's moved into the guest room, 947 00:45:22,840 --> 00:45:24,879 Speaker 4: although that's not where he wants to be, but that's 948 00:45:24,920 --> 00:45:28,800 Speaker 4: where he's he is permanently. The house is on the market, 949 00:45:28,920 --> 00:45:31,000 Speaker 4: so I'm trying to sell, you know, sell the house 950 00:45:31,080 --> 00:45:34,759 Speaker 4: so I can move back to the South. I'm going 951 00:45:34,840 --> 00:45:38,759 Speaker 4: to be a first time glamy. My daughter's pregnant, so 952 00:45:39,640 --> 00:45:43,480 Speaker 4: thank you and to me, it's like the rainbow at 953 00:45:43,480 --> 00:45:46,640 Speaker 4: the end of a storm. It's a chance of a 954 00:45:46,680 --> 00:45:49,799 Speaker 4: new life starting over. Of course I didn't want to 955 00:45:49,840 --> 00:45:52,760 Speaker 4: do it at this age, but things happen for a reason, 956 00:45:52,960 --> 00:45:55,960 Speaker 4: and I believe that maybe God put all this on 957 00:45:56,040 --> 00:45:59,520 Speaker 4: me to deliver a message to other women that there 958 00:45:59,560 --> 00:46:02,839 Speaker 4: is no shame and loving the wrong person. It's not 959 00:46:02,960 --> 00:46:06,600 Speaker 4: your fault. You love who you love and they love 960 00:46:06,760 --> 00:46:09,640 Speaker 4: how they love. And if they don't love you properly, 961 00:46:10,520 --> 00:46:13,520 Speaker 4: you have to whether that's storm and get through it 962 00:46:13,680 --> 00:46:17,000 Speaker 4: and heal from it, learn from it, and at the 963 00:46:17,080 --> 00:46:19,680 Speaker 4: end of that storm, it's going to be a beautiful rainbow. 964 00:46:19,800 --> 00:46:22,360 Speaker 4: You can start over and find love again. And I 965 00:46:22,480 --> 00:46:23,440 Speaker 4: think when you get to a. 966 00:46:23,400 --> 00:46:26,319 Speaker 6: Particular age, You're like, man, because that's how I feel. 967 00:46:26,360 --> 00:46:28,839 Speaker 4: I'm like, I don't want to be in my fifties 968 00:46:29,040 --> 00:46:34,879 Speaker 4: dating not like the options. And I'm not gonna say, 969 00:46:35,320 --> 00:46:39,000 Speaker 4: you know, there's pe in the dating pool. It's a 970 00:46:39,000 --> 00:46:42,680 Speaker 4: little cloudy, it's a little unsavory. 971 00:46:42,719 --> 00:46:44,000 Speaker 6: You don't because I. 972 00:46:44,040 --> 00:46:46,319 Speaker 4: Know how it was when I was dating before I 973 00:46:46,360 --> 00:46:49,520 Speaker 4: got married, and to go back to that, it's a 974 00:46:49,560 --> 00:46:52,520 Speaker 4: little But I'd rather be by myself and have peace 975 00:46:53,880 --> 00:46:57,719 Speaker 4: than dating these men that find you in peace and 976 00:46:57,840 --> 00:46:58,520 Speaker 4: leave you in. 977 00:46:58,600 --> 00:47:00,480 Speaker 2: Pieces about it. 978 00:47:00,520 --> 00:47:03,720 Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, because they swear all they want is peace 979 00:47:03,760 --> 00:47:04,279 Speaker 3: from a woman. 980 00:47:04,320 --> 00:47:06,320 Speaker 2: But these niggas is not peaceful. 981 00:47:06,360 --> 00:47:09,400 Speaker 4: Right, And that's the thing you want what you're not giving. 982 00:47:10,480 --> 00:47:14,120 Speaker 4: And I felt like that was the relationship. Oh he 983 00:47:14,239 --> 00:47:18,080 Speaker 4: wanted all these things, but you're not giving the basics, 984 00:47:18,120 --> 00:47:27,960 Speaker 4: which is trust, loyalty, integrity and yeah and yes, because 985 00:47:27,960 --> 00:47:31,480 Speaker 4: how can you just get married to someone but then 986 00:47:31,520 --> 00:47:38,239 Speaker 4: you're out here with whomover that you're meeting wherever, doing whatever, 987 00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:41,799 Speaker 4: and then you come home to your wife, you kiss 988 00:47:41,840 --> 00:47:44,480 Speaker 4: them all in the mouth and you hug on kids. 989 00:47:44,719 --> 00:47:46,560 Speaker 2: Yeah kids, Yeah, Like. 990 00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:50,160 Speaker 4: I should wash your mouth out with bleach at this point, 991 00:47:50,280 --> 00:47:51,000 Speaker 4: you're nasty. 992 00:47:52,600 --> 00:47:53,600 Speaker 5: Would marry again? 993 00:47:53,880 --> 00:47:59,200 Speaker 4: I would, but I am definitely more cautious, and I 994 00:47:59,239 --> 00:48:02,000 Speaker 4: think that there were some red flegs that I didn't 995 00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:06,799 Speaker 4: pay attention to. But I will definitely because sometimes we 996 00:48:06,840 --> 00:48:09,279 Speaker 4: get in our own way, and what may be a 997 00:48:09,320 --> 00:48:12,360 Speaker 4: red flag may not really be a red flag. Like 998 00:48:12,440 --> 00:48:15,560 Speaker 4: I would, I would go on a date. 999 00:48:16,200 --> 00:48:20,399 Speaker 6: And if I didn't like his shoes, I wasn't. They 1000 00:48:20,400 --> 00:48:21,400 Speaker 6: didn't get. 1001 00:48:23,200 --> 00:48:25,879 Speaker 2: You know how you I don't like how this nigga chew. 1002 00:48:26,080 --> 00:48:26,720 Speaker 2: I'm out. 1003 00:48:31,520 --> 00:48:33,120 Speaker 5: Why he got his T shirt took me. 1004 00:48:33,200 --> 00:48:35,480 Speaker 2: I think I'm starting to be like that shirt. 1005 00:48:35,840 --> 00:48:39,000 Speaker 3: I think I'm starting to be like that. Like normally 1006 00:48:39,040 --> 00:48:41,319 Speaker 3: I'll be staying. I'll stay in a relationship so damn 1007 00:48:41,320 --> 00:48:44,319 Speaker 3: long for no reason. Now I be getting out soon 1008 00:48:44,360 --> 00:48:45,360 Speaker 3: and earlier because. 1009 00:48:45,120 --> 00:48:47,040 Speaker 6: You don't have the older you get. You don't have 1010 00:48:47,160 --> 00:48:47,920 Speaker 6: that time to way. 1011 00:48:47,960 --> 00:48:51,440 Speaker 4: I don't have that time to keep wasting, you know, 1012 00:48:51,640 --> 00:48:55,240 Speaker 4: trying to overlook things. And then you have to convince 1013 00:48:55,560 --> 00:48:59,040 Speaker 4: convince yourself, like, okay, is this that bad? 1014 00:48:59,200 --> 00:49:02,000 Speaker 6: Can I put a with that? Can I deal with that? 1015 00:49:02,360 --> 00:49:05,800 Speaker 4: Like you're adjusting your once and needs for someone else, 1016 00:49:05,840 --> 00:49:09,279 Speaker 4: and ultimately, five years from now, the same things that 1017 00:49:09,360 --> 00:49:12,240 Speaker 4: you overlooked that were okay. 1018 00:49:12,239 --> 00:49:14,400 Speaker 6: Are now getting on your goddamn nuds. 1019 00:49:14,440 --> 00:49:16,839 Speaker 1: So saying that, speaking of that, let me ask you this. 1020 00:49:16,880 --> 00:49:19,959 Speaker 1: So he was legally married to someone else and didn't 1021 00:49:19,960 --> 00:49:22,120 Speaker 1: get a vorced till two months after you were married. 1022 00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:24,680 Speaker 5: But were you happy outside of that? 1023 00:49:25,120 --> 00:49:27,400 Speaker 6: No, because here's the truth. 1024 00:49:27,440 --> 00:49:30,040 Speaker 4: If I was happy outside of that, we could have 1025 00:49:30,120 --> 00:49:33,200 Speaker 4: worked through that. I would have told him, Okay, let's 1026 00:49:33,239 --> 00:49:36,040 Speaker 4: just get a little secret ceremony and get. 1027 00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:38,000 Speaker 6: Married and no one will know but us. 1028 00:49:38,480 --> 00:49:41,399 Speaker 4: But when I looked at everything that I went through 1029 00:49:41,440 --> 00:49:46,640 Speaker 4: in the just the year from January of twenty twenty two, 1030 00:49:47,040 --> 00:49:50,239 Speaker 4: So when I found out, I'm like, look at all 1031 00:49:50,280 --> 00:49:52,319 Speaker 4: this shit you you did. 1032 00:49:53,160 --> 00:49:56,720 Speaker 2: So this is like new, y'all, this is new new. 1033 00:49:56,960 --> 00:50:03,000 Speaker 4: Got married last year year January, took him on a 1034 00:50:03,080 --> 00:50:08,040 Speaker 4: trip for his birthday in April, came back from the trip, 1035 00:50:09,200 --> 00:50:12,080 Speaker 4: I'm like, you know how we had those intuitions. 1036 00:50:12,120 --> 00:50:15,200 Speaker 6: Something's wrong, something's not right. Look at his phone. 1037 00:50:15,360 --> 00:50:19,000 Speaker 4: He's all chee chatting with some two women, and I'm like, 1038 00:50:19,760 --> 00:50:24,319 Speaker 4: this is this isn't an appropriate conversation. And then you 1039 00:50:24,480 --> 00:50:27,000 Speaker 4: know it's not appropriate when you only talk to them 1040 00:50:27,000 --> 00:50:27,879 Speaker 4: when you're not home. 1041 00:50:28,600 --> 00:50:30,239 Speaker 6: If they call you in your home, you. 1042 00:50:30,160 --> 00:50:33,319 Speaker 4: Don't answer, Like, these are all signs to me that 1043 00:50:33,560 --> 00:50:35,080 Speaker 4: something's just not right here. 1044 00:50:35,360 --> 00:50:37,799 Speaker 6: But then you're being told, oh, they're just friends, they're 1045 00:50:37,840 --> 00:50:38,320 Speaker 6: just friends. 1046 00:50:38,400 --> 00:50:40,239 Speaker 4: No, I know who just a friend is, and I 1047 00:50:40,360 --> 00:50:42,759 Speaker 4: know how just friends talk to each other, and this 1048 00:50:42,800 --> 00:50:43,279 Speaker 4: ain't it. 1049 00:50:43,680 --> 00:50:45,400 Speaker 6: And one lady lives in Charlotte. 1050 00:50:45,920 --> 00:50:48,600 Speaker 11: Oh shit, And I texted her. I said this, so 1051 00:50:48,680 --> 00:50:52,359 Speaker 11: I'm about to see you, but alimation of affection. If 1052 00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:55,799 Speaker 11: I see your number, you can do that. Yeah, and 1053 00:50:55,880 --> 00:50:59,160 Speaker 11: you know, as long as one person lives there. I 1054 00:50:59,200 --> 00:51:01,520 Speaker 11: didn't have to live there, neither day he, but she did. 1055 00:51:01,600 --> 00:51:03,839 Speaker 11: She was like, well you you and your husband lose 1056 00:51:03,880 --> 00:51:07,120 Speaker 11: my number. Oh yeah, I'll lose your number. You better 1057 00:51:07,160 --> 00:51:08,160 Speaker 11: than Bess my bet? 1058 00:51:09,760 --> 00:51:10,160 Speaker 6: I bet. 1059 00:51:15,200 --> 00:51:15,480 Speaker 5: Sorry. 1060 00:51:15,600 --> 00:51:18,920 Speaker 1: Let me ask you this before you married him, was 1061 00:51:18,960 --> 00:51:23,160 Speaker 1: it ever any inkland like, oh, maybe I shouldn't do this, 1062 00:51:23,320 --> 00:51:27,520 Speaker 1: Maybe he's not the one, Maybe I'm making a mistake again, 1063 00:51:27,600 --> 00:51:29,440 Speaker 1: Like did you feel any of that before you say 1064 00:51:30,000 --> 00:51:30,319 Speaker 1: it was? 1065 00:51:30,400 --> 00:51:33,680 Speaker 4: Fifty to fifty half of me was like, you sure 1066 00:51:33,719 --> 00:51:36,480 Speaker 4: you want to do this? Maybe this isn't the person 1067 00:51:36,600 --> 00:51:39,680 Speaker 4: you're supposed to marry. But then the other half of 1068 00:51:39,719 --> 00:51:42,640 Speaker 4: me said, well, why would God put y'all back together 1069 00:51:43,760 --> 00:51:46,480 Speaker 4: if you're not supposed to be with this person? So 1070 00:51:46,520 --> 00:51:48,759 Speaker 4: it was like half and half and like who do 1071 00:51:48,880 --> 00:51:52,920 Speaker 4: you listen to? Who's stronger, who has more of a word? 1072 00:51:53,480 --> 00:51:56,040 Speaker 4: And then I had I realized after the fact, like 1073 00:51:56,120 --> 00:51:58,960 Speaker 4: you know, was that even God that put us back together? 1074 00:51:59,080 --> 00:52:01,680 Speaker 4: It could have been some thing or someone else. And 1075 00:52:01,760 --> 00:52:05,400 Speaker 4: you want to believe, oh, we're destined to be together. 1076 00:52:05,480 --> 00:52:10,160 Speaker 4: God brought us back together. No that the Lord probably 1077 00:52:10,280 --> 00:52:13,880 Speaker 4: was saying, girl, don't do it. But you're you're taking 1078 00:52:13,960 --> 00:52:16,399 Speaker 4: messages and your turn. 1079 00:52:16,640 --> 00:52:18,720 Speaker 6: You want them to believe Yeah I did. 1080 00:52:18,560 --> 00:52:21,799 Speaker 2: That, Yeah you did that. 1081 00:52:22,000 --> 00:52:24,399 Speaker 6: He said all the right things, and I was like. 1082 00:52:24,480 --> 00:52:26,800 Speaker 2: Okay, maybe he did not ratting. 1083 00:52:27,600 --> 00:52:30,799 Speaker 4: And you want to give people the benefit of the doll. 1084 00:52:30,880 --> 00:52:32,640 Speaker 4: You want to give them a second chance. And I 1085 00:52:32,800 --> 00:52:35,760 Speaker 4: wanted to believe that. You know that's certain age you want. 1086 00:52:35,760 --> 00:52:38,720 Speaker 6: Better for your life. You don't want to keep doing. 1087 00:52:38,640 --> 00:52:42,920 Speaker 4: The same old dumb shit year after year after year. 1088 00:52:43,040 --> 00:52:46,080 Speaker 4: And you look back, you're in your sixties, you're by yourself. 1089 00:52:46,680 --> 00:52:49,279 Speaker 4: No one comes to visit you, no one call you. 1090 00:52:49,480 --> 00:52:51,759 Speaker 4: Your kids can't stand you because you're a piece of ship. 1091 00:52:51,920 --> 00:52:54,400 Speaker 4: Like at some point in time, do what When do 1092 00:52:54,560 --> 00:52:55,960 Speaker 4: you want better for your life? 1093 00:52:57,440 --> 00:53:00,279 Speaker 6: I guess never. When they're like in this stuff needs 1094 00:53:00,280 --> 00:53:02,200 Speaker 6: in a wheelchair. I need somebody to wipe their ass, 1095 00:53:02,560 --> 00:53:03,279 Speaker 6: but it won't be me. 1096 00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:06,880 Speaker 4: Has anybody reached out to you about being in a book? Like? 1097 00:53:06,920 --> 00:53:09,279 Speaker 2: Why are you put living right now? 1098 00:53:11,480 --> 00:53:13,600 Speaker 5: That's why I want to know the show? 1099 00:53:13,680 --> 00:53:18,520 Speaker 2: Why he at work? That nigga like you trolling me 1100 00:53:18,600 --> 00:53:20,960 Speaker 2: in real life? Like I'm sick of your ass already, 1101 00:53:21,040 --> 00:53:22,400 Speaker 2: but you better. 1102 00:53:22,280 --> 00:53:24,520 Speaker 3: Make sure I pickwork right from when y'all get that 1103 00:53:24,600 --> 00:53:26,960 Speaker 3: divorce he for to get some money off that book. 1104 00:53:27,200 --> 00:53:29,120 Speaker 6: Oh he will not already, asks an attorney. 1105 00:53:29,200 --> 00:53:32,080 Speaker 4: I say, said, you know, if y'all live separate and 1106 00:53:32,160 --> 00:53:35,759 Speaker 4: y'all are living as separated, he can't get anything from 1107 00:53:35,840 --> 00:53:40,480 Speaker 4: the point of when y'all alienated each other. So I'm like, okay, 1108 00:53:41,160 --> 00:53:44,520 Speaker 4: you staying your living quarters and I'll stay in mind. 1109 00:53:44,560 --> 00:53:47,040 Speaker 6: Don't try to tiptoe over here. They won't be none 1110 00:53:47,080 --> 00:53:47,200 Speaker 6: of that. 1111 00:53:48,880 --> 00:53:51,720 Speaker 4: You live a sneak and get a little counting. 1112 00:53:51,400 --> 00:53:55,360 Speaker 6: Out because I don't know where that's I don't know 1113 00:53:55,440 --> 00:53:57,680 Speaker 6: where that's been, so I don't want it. 1114 00:53:58,239 --> 00:54:02,359 Speaker 4: When you get the community service and you're delivering, Dick, 1115 00:54:02,640 --> 00:54:03,600 Speaker 4: I don't want none of it. 1116 00:54:04,840 --> 00:54:07,160 Speaker 3: Ac if you won a part time job, he got 1117 00:54:07,640 --> 00:54:16,000 Speaker 3: what and we talked back uber meets that's our company 1118 00:54:18,400 --> 00:54:21,799 Speaker 3: act that like, obviously he got bombshit, right because y'all 1119 00:54:21,840 --> 00:54:24,160 Speaker 3: were dating and he was married at that time too. 1120 00:54:24,200 --> 00:54:27,239 Speaker 3: If it was a whole eight year marriage, right or 1121 00:54:27,280 --> 00:54:30,040 Speaker 3: however long it was, you said he was gone for eight. 1122 00:54:30,040 --> 00:54:31,600 Speaker 2: Years and then came back into your life. 1123 00:54:32,080 --> 00:54:35,480 Speaker 4: We were together. I've known him for eight years, okay, total, 1124 00:54:35,960 --> 00:54:38,080 Speaker 4: he married. He stayed married to her for so long, 1125 00:54:38,160 --> 00:54:39,520 Speaker 4: and she gets half his pension. 1126 00:54:39,800 --> 00:54:40,799 Speaker 2: Girls, shut up. 1127 00:54:41,239 --> 00:54:44,080 Speaker 4: Kept her on his because he's retired from the military, 1128 00:54:44,239 --> 00:54:46,279 Speaker 4: so he kept her on his benefits. 1129 00:54:48,680 --> 00:54:51,839 Speaker 6: Yeah, found out he later he was paying her cell 1130 00:54:51,920 --> 00:54:54,400 Speaker 6: phone bill. But try to say he forgot she was 1131 00:54:54,480 --> 00:54:55,480 Speaker 6: on his plane. 1132 00:54:56,120 --> 00:54:58,880 Speaker 4: All this nonsense, and now she gets half of his. 1133 00:54:59,360 --> 00:55:01,719 Speaker 4: And I think how she worked it. I mean, she 1134 00:55:02,000 --> 00:55:03,120 Speaker 4: she's a smart lady. 1135 00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:07,920 Speaker 6: She was selling her house, which he never lived in 1136 00:55:08,719 --> 00:55:09,719 Speaker 6: but helped her buy. 1137 00:55:11,040 --> 00:55:14,720 Speaker 4: And I guess the deal was, I'm gonna sell my house, 1138 00:55:15,080 --> 00:55:18,080 Speaker 4: I'm not giving you anything from it, and I'll go 1139 00:55:18,160 --> 00:55:21,840 Speaker 4: ahead and get your divorce because I know you're getting married. Wow. 1140 00:55:22,800 --> 00:55:26,280 Speaker 4: And then here come paperwork. She wants half your pension. 1141 00:55:26,360 --> 00:55:28,759 Speaker 4: So she sold her house, kept that profit and she's 1142 00:55:28,800 --> 00:55:29,880 Speaker 4: getting half your pension. 1143 00:55:31,160 --> 00:55:34,440 Speaker 2: Okay, how long ago were they actively like together? 1144 00:55:35,520 --> 00:55:36,680 Speaker 6: Oh it's been years. 1145 00:55:37,800 --> 00:55:40,760 Speaker 4: He's never went to like because she lives in Texas, 1146 00:55:40,800 --> 00:55:44,440 Speaker 4: so he's never like went to visit her. He never 1147 00:55:44,600 --> 00:55:46,920 Speaker 4: disappeared and was gone off to Texas. 1148 00:55:46,560 --> 00:55:49,320 Speaker 6: Somewhere and I'm like, what are you doing there? It 1149 00:55:49,520 --> 00:55:52,600 Speaker 6: was I don't even think she really could stand him. 1150 00:55:53,160 --> 00:55:54,040 Speaker 6: She never called. 1151 00:55:54,080 --> 00:55:57,000 Speaker 4: It was never a situation of she called late at 1152 00:55:57,080 --> 00:55:59,239 Speaker 4: night and they're talking and I see her number every 1153 00:55:59,320 --> 00:56:03,560 Speaker 4: now and then. No, they rarely talked because their kids 1154 00:56:03,600 --> 00:56:07,120 Speaker 4: were grown and their late mid to late twenties, so 1155 00:56:07,239 --> 00:56:10,040 Speaker 4: they she was never they. 1156 00:56:10,000 --> 00:56:12,640 Speaker 3: Just never got a divorce basically, because a lot of 1157 00:56:12,680 --> 00:56:15,600 Speaker 3: black people live like that. Like my mom didn't divorce 1158 00:56:15,680 --> 00:56:18,760 Speaker 3: my dad until maybe the month before she married my stepdad. 1159 00:56:19,640 --> 00:56:22,360 Speaker 4: Yeah, and she was, look, I got to divorce you 1160 00:56:22,640 --> 00:56:24,319 Speaker 4: because I'm marrying somebody else. 1161 00:56:25,120 --> 00:56:27,000 Speaker 2: But he should have done it. 1162 00:56:27,280 --> 00:56:30,840 Speaker 3: Did it overlapped, basically, and then he didn't initiate the 1163 00:56:30,920 --> 00:56:33,760 Speaker 3: divorce with her, which. 1164 00:56:33,640 --> 00:56:36,279 Speaker 6: If you wanted it that bad, you could have. You 1165 00:56:36,400 --> 00:56:39,360 Speaker 6: had time to do it. She filed for the divorce. 1166 00:56:39,880 --> 00:56:42,840 Speaker 4: So if she if she's never filed for the divorce, 1167 00:56:43,400 --> 00:56:45,920 Speaker 4: I'm even once during although we got married, if she 1168 00:56:46,080 --> 00:56:47,200 Speaker 4: never filed for the divorce. 1169 00:56:47,280 --> 00:56:50,080 Speaker 6: Where he what he even had said anything? 1170 00:56:50,560 --> 00:56:53,200 Speaker 4: Because we were engaged before when we lived in Charlotte, 1171 00:56:53,200 --> 00:56:56,240 Speaker 4: we were engaged two times and then for cheating. 1172 00:56:56,360 --> 00:56:58,880 Speaker 6: I was like, no, I'm not marrying. You were not left. 1173 00:56:58,960 --> 00:57:01,120 Speaker 4: So for you to come back and like, let's get married, 1174 00:57:01,160 --> 00:57:02,880 Speaker 4: I would think, calm and since we'll tell you you 1175 00:57:02,920 --> 00:57:05,520 Speaker 4: should have taken care of that situation when you had 1176 00:57:05,600 --> 00:57:10,759 Speaker 4: the chance. The first couple of times engage, you was 1177 00:57:10,880 --> 00:57:11,520 Speaker 4: engaged to that. 1178 00:57:11,640 --> 00:57:12,480 Speaker 2: Man more than once. 1179 00:57:12,760 --> 00:57:13,400 Speaker 4: Three times? 1180 00:57:13,440 --> 00:57:16,000 Speaker 2: You was engaged to him? Oh three times? 1181 00:57:16,280 --> 00:57:18,919 Speaker 5: Chih Now I see, Now you got to take some accountability. 1182 00:57:19,520 --> 00:57:27,040 Speaker 2: I did because I'm not, by said now cheated. I 1183 00:57:27,320 --> 00:57:27,919 Speaker 2: left him. 1184 00:57:28,480 --> 00:57:31,919 Speaker 6: I was doing my thing back home, having a good time, 1185 00:57:32,760 --> 00:57:36,320 Speaker 6: running with my girls, my homeboys, meeting, dating, all that, 1186 00:57:36,560 --> 00:57:39,480 Speaker 6: and then he came back and was like, I've changed. 1187 00:57:39,760 --> 00:57:43,400 Speaker 6: I realized what I've lost. I was miserable without you. 1188 00:57:43,960 --> 00:57:46,520 Speaker 4: Come to find out, he wasn't really that miserable because 1189 00:57:46,520 --> 00:57:49,720 Speaker 4: he was out here dropping it low and spreadnant. Why 1190 00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:50,960 Speaker 4: I knew why. 1191 00:57:54,120 --> 00:57:56,080 Speaker 6: I've seen some of the things of the chicks, and 1192 00:57:56,160 --> 00:58:00,400 Speaker 6: I'm like, even meet these people? I mean I I 1193 00:58:00,520 --> 00:58:02,640 Speaker 6: figured out now how he met. 1194 00:58:02,600 --> 00:58:05,960 Speaker 4: Them, because it was some people using fish or something 1195 00:58:06,040 --> 00:58:06,200 Speaker 4: like that. 1196 00:58:06,480 --> 00:58:08,560 Speaker 6: Worse than that back page. 1197 00:58:10,120 --> 00:58:11,520 Speaker 5: They don't get no worse bag. 1198 00:58:13,000 --> 00:58:15,440 Speaker 6: I don't even can can we legally even say the name? 1199 00:58:15,560 --> 00:58:17,000 Speaker 4: I ain't trying to look, I ain't trying to get 1200 00:58:17,080 --> 00:58:20,880 Speaker 4: sued now, Yes, s have y'all ever heard of school? 1201 00:58:21,760 --> 00:58:24,520 Speaker 2: No that I'm jealous. 1202 00:58:24,680 --> 00:58:28,560 Speaker 6: I wish y'all came up with that, Yeah, because they 1203 00:58:28,560 --> 00:58:32,000 Speaker 6: ain't trust me. Baby the Jay. 1204 00:58:32,080 --> 00:58:33,960 Speaker 5: Start score Crocodile. 1205 00:58:35,280 --> 00:58:38,360 Speaker 6: For men, because this is just women. 1206 00:58:38,480 --> 00:58:41,600 Speaker 4: So start that for for for women that's looking for 1207 00:58:41,880 --> 00:58:45,600 Speaker 4: male company at night, you know, come over, do business 1208 00:58:45,720 --> 00:58:46,800 Speaker 4: and going about your business. 1209 00:58:47,240 --> 00:58:53,000 Speaker 6: Basically, that's what it is online Ladies of the night. 1210 00:58:53,320 --> 00:58:56,000 Speaker 6: It's like ordering pizza. I guess you ordering pussy. 1211 00:58:57,840 --> 00:59:00,760 Speaker 5: I don't mean same thing that's we're trying to create. 1212 00:59:00,880 --> 00:59:03,800 Speaker 3: This is wild to me, so that that is scary, 1213 00:59:03,840 --> 00:59:05,400 Speaker 3: you know what I'm saying, Because it's not like he's 1214 00:59:05,480 --> 00:59:08,400 Speaker 3: having intimate relationships with people he's known for a long time, 1215 00:59:08,560 --> 00:59:12,520 Speaker 3: like you, right, random random bitches off the internet. 1216 00:59:12,920 --> 00:59:13,720 Speaker 6: Off the Internet. 1217 00:59:16,800 --> 00:59:20,800 Speaker 4: Yes, and people after they read the book, they're like, well, 1218 00:59:20,840 --> 00:59:22,280 Speaker 4: do you think he has a problem. 1219 00:59:22,400 --> 00:59:24,479 Speaker 6: I don't. I don't know, I don't care. 1220 00:59:24,640 --> 00:59:29,360 Speaker 2: I don't get the Does he think he has a problem. No, Yeah, 1221 00:59:30,400 --> 00:59:32,680 Speaker 2: because he he knew he got a problem. 1222 00:59:33,360 --> 00:59:39,200 Speaker 4: He's anytime alligator for pussy, you got a problem, You 1223 00:59:39,280 --> 00:59:40,240 Speaker 4: got a problem, sir. 1224 00:59:41,680 --> 00:59:43,760 Speaker 6: Anytime you have to spend money. 1225 00:59:44,400 --> 00:59:46,560 Speaker 3: He got a lot of disposable income. Tell him we're 1226 00:59:46,560 --> 00:59:47,480 Speaker 3: trying to open a studio. 1227 00:59:47,920 --> 00:59:48,240 Speaker 2: Okay. 1228 00:59:49,680 --> 00:59:53,000 Speaker 3: You know, because he's not only cheating like he paid 1229 00:59:53,040 --> 00:59:55,200 Speaker 3: for pussy. That's a whole different level of cheating for me. 1230 00:59:55,320 --> 00:59:58,440 Speaker 3: I might can't deal with the cheating if you ain't man. 1231 00:59:57,840 --> 01:00:00,560 Speaker 1: Paying some type of way, but type of way that 1232 01:00:00,640 --> 01:00:03,560 Speaker 1: I'd rather you take me out to dinner or on 1233 01:00:03,720 --> 01:00:05,960 Speaker 1: a trip and you paid for it that way, but 1234 01:00:06,160 --> 01:00:09,160 Speaker 1: just to order it for like fifty dollars and you know, 1235 01:00:09,560 --> 01:00:10,800 Speaker 1: And and it's. 1236 01:00:10,720 --> 01:00:16,520 Speaker 2: The quality of Acucci that is not quality, is not quality? 1237 01:00:16,720 --> 01:00:19,200 Speaker 5: Okay, that definitely discount. 1238 01:00:19,360 --> 01:00:21,880 Speaker 2: Yes, That's what I'm saying. I need that we like 1239 01:00:22,040 --> 01:00:23,360 Speaker 2: is the race walk and hired. 1240 01:00:24,920 --> 01:00:27,160 Speaker 4: Yeah, those girls are probably on drugs and all kind 1241 01:00:27,160 --> 01:00:29,080 Speaker 4: of stuff. They don't have no self word. They look 1242 01:00:29,200 --> 01:00:32,840 Speaker 4: like it because you know he's had he'll he's had 1243 01:00:32,960 --> 01:00:35,600 Speaker 4: pictures in his phone, little video head there. 1244 01:00:35,720 --> 01:00:37,640 Speaker 6: I guess, you know, if you're paying for what they 1245 01:00:37,760 --> 01:00:40,920 Speaker 6: let you record them or whatever. And I'm like, when 1246 01:00:41,000 --> 01:00:42,200 Speaker 6: did you meet these people? 1247 01:00:42,920 --> 01:00:44,439 Speaker 2: Did you say a condom in the video? 1248 01:00:46,160 --> 01:00:51,080 Speaker 6: No, it may have come, it may have surfaced later, 1249 01:00:51,520 --> 01:00:56,800 Speaker 6: but at the at the point of these videos. Yeah, 1250 01:00:56,920 --> 01:00:58,959 Speaker 6: she may have put it on with her mouth later, 1251 01:00:59,400 --> 01:01:00,640 Speaker 6: but at that moments. 1252 01:01:01,760 --> 01:01:01,800 Speaker 10: No. 1253 01:01:02,960 --> 01:01:04,600 Speaker 2: Yeah, this is a bit much. 1254 01:01:05,960 --> 01:01:09,200 Speaker 4: Imagine living living it and you finding these things as 1255 01:01:09,280 --> 01:01:12,080 Speaker 4: you go, and it's like one thing after another after another, 1256 01:01:12,280 --> 01:01:15,320 Speaker 4: and your life. It's a shock of it all for 1257 01:01:15,480 --> 01:01:18,240 Speaker 4: me as well, Like I we bought a house, like 1258 01:01:18,440 --> 01:01:21,120 Speaker 4: I thought we were gonna have this life, and come 1259 01:01:21,200 --> 01:01:24,320 Speaker 4: to find out you are a fucking devil in disguise, 1260 01:01:25,120 --> 01:01:26,760 Speaker 4: Like I feel hoodwinked. 1261 01:01:27,840 --> 01:01:31,160 Speaker 6: You've bemboozled me for months. 1262 01:01:32,200 --> 01:01:34,560 Speaker 4: And now that you know, I wrote a book and 1263 01:01:34,680 --> 01:01:36,840 Speaker 4: people are finding out. Now you want to be the 1264 01:01:36,920 --> 01:01:40,240 Speaker 4: embarrassed when you you're you're you're worried about how people. 1265 01:01:40,080 --> 01:01:42,200 Speaker 6: Are gonna think about you, what they're gonna say, and 1266 01:01:42,840 --> 01:01:45,800 Speaker 6: and and now you're concerned with your kids finding out. 1267 01:01:45,960 --> 01:01:48,680 Speaker 4: But you weren't None of that was a concern when 1268 01:01:48,720 --> 01:01:52,560 Speaker 4: you was out here, you know, fucking in your car 1269 01:01:52,840 --> 01:01:54,560 Speaker 4: or going to some tricks house and. 1270 01:01:56,040 --> 01:01:58,080 Speaker 2: None of that well whole house, cause he the trick. 1271 01:02:01,640 --> 01:02:05,360 Speaker 3: So for me just being so for me, like being 1272 01:02:05,400 --> 01:02:07,280 Speaker 3: able to just talk about my bullshit with people like 1273 01:02:07,400 --> 01:02:11,680 Speaker 3: that is like how I get relief from stupid bit shit, right, 1274 01:02:12,200 --> 01:02:15,720 Speaker 3: But like writing a book, like how was it for 1275 01:02:15,840 --> 01:02:17,640 Speaker 3: you to have to relive these things? 1276 01:02:18,360 --> 01:02:20,920 Speaker 2: Or you know, was it therapeutic to get it out? 1277 01:02:22,320 --> 01:02:24,600 Speaker 4: I thought it would be therapeutic to get it out, 1278 01:02:25,280 --> 01:02:28,280 Speaker 4: but when you sit because it actually started like I 1279 01:02:28,360 --> 01:02:31,800 Speaker 4: started with my childhood because I was like maybe I 1280 01:02:31,840 --> 01:02:35,600 Speaker 4: don't know if y'all know any West Indian, have any 1281 01:02:35,640 --> 01:02:38,480 Speaker 4: West Indian friends, and you know their parents raised them 1282 01:02:38,520 --> 01:02:44,000 Speaker 4: a little stern were raised a little different from Barados, right, yes, yes, 1283 01:02:44,640 --> 01:02:49,480 Speaker 4: And I don't know if had being raised away and 1284 01:02:49,680 --> 01:02:52,160 Speaker 4: bringing raised in the household I was raised, and if 1285 01:02:52,200 --> 01:02:55,760 Speaker 4: that played a part in looking for the love that 1286 01:02:55,880 --> 01:02:58,840 Speaker 4: you see on TV, Like, you know, he's not a 1287 01:02:58,880 --> 01:03:02,320 Speaker 4: good example to use these days, but like the Cliff Huxtable, 1288 01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:06,440 Speaker 4: you know, with Claire and their loving relationship and dancing 1289 01:03:06,600 --> 01:03:09,680 Speaker 4: and listening to music, and you know, raising kids together. 1290 01:03:09,880 --> 01:03:14,000 Speaker 4: You want that when you don't have it. And so 1291 01:03:14,160 --> 01:03:17,960 Speaker 4: the book starts with that, like you know, childhood and 1292 01:03:18,040 --> 01:03:20,280 Speaker 4: a little bit of dating in school, and then it 1293 01:03:20,360 --> 01:03:21,200 Speaker 4: goes into. 1294 01:03:21,560 --> 01:03:22,680 Speaker 6: The adult relationships. 1295 01:03:22,720 --> 01:03:25,720 Speaker 4: So when you have to sit and think about things 1296 01:03:25,760 --> 01:03:29,880 Speaker 4: that sometimes your brain wants you to forget, it can 1297 01:03:29,920 --> 01:03:33,280 Speaker 4: get a little traumatic. And then at one point in time, 1298 01:03:33,360 --> 01:03:35,000 Speaker 4: when I was writing it, when I got. 1299 01:03:34,960 --> 01:03:37,920 Speaker 6: To this situation, I even said. 1300 01:03:37,800 --> 01:03:40,720 Speaker 4: To myself, like, you were dumb and shit you put 1301 01:03:40,840 --> 01:03:44,760 Speaker 4: up with you let that man do more than he 1302 01:03:44,920 --> 01:03:49,480 Speaker 4: should have. You gave him entirely too much grace, and 1303 01:03:49,600 --> 01:03:52,960 Speaker 4: you forgave entirely too much. And I even told him, 1304 01:03:53,000 --> 01:03:55,960 Speaker 4: I said, I think I forgave you so much that 1305 01:03:56,120 --> 01:03:58,320 Speaker 4: you just didn't know how to stop. 1306 01:03:58,360 --> 01:04:00,640 Speaker 6: It's like a kid. You keep giving them candy, They're 1307 01:04:00,640 --> 01:04:01,600 Speaker 6: gonna keep eating it. 1308 01:04:01,680 --> 01:04:03,520 Speaker 2: That's why you gotta beat the ass the first time. 1309 01:04:05,400 --> 01:04:05,600 Speaker 1: Yeah. 1310 01:04:06,160 --> 01:04:09,080 Speaker 4: And I thought, I thought when I beat his ass 1311 01:04:09,160 --> 01:04:13,480 Speaker 4: the first time and left him, that he learned. 1312 01:04:13,240 --> 01:04:15,360 Speaker 5: His lessons, had learned his lesses. 1313 01:04:15,840 --> 01:04:19,680 Speaker 4: I mean and and and actually literally like I put 1314 01:04:20,160 --> 01:04:24,560 Speaker 4: fist the face with him one morning because I. 1315 01:04:24,680 --> 01:04:26,600 Speaker 6: Rest some text between him and a coworker. 1316 01:04:26,640 --> 01:04:29,440 Speaker 4: And one thing, if you're gonna cheat and talk to 1317 01:04:29,560 --> 01:04:32,200 Speaker 4: chicks and even talk to chicks that work, that's one thing. 1318 01:04:32,280 --> 01:04:36,400 Speaker 6: But when you talk bad about me now talking. 1319 01:04:36,240 --> 01:04:37,160 Speaker 2: With the side bitches. 1320 01:04:37,880 --> 01:04:41,000 Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, at what point do we hold at what 1321 01:04:41,120 --> 01:04:43,360 Speaker 3: point do we hold other women accountable? Because I know 1322 01:04:43,440 --> 01:04:45,680 Speaker 3: they know he was married, You know what I'm saying. 1323 01:04:45,920 --> 01:04:48,760 Speaker 3: And then you like, if you know this nigga only 1324 01:04:48,840 --> 01:04:50,920 Speaker 3: calling you. Remember we did the live show Tammy, right 1325 01:04:51,160 --> 01:04:53,400 Speaker 3: and the girl in the front row and she was talking. 1326 01:04:53,440 --> 01:04:56,080 Speaker 3: Now your homegirl looked this man up and found out 1327 01:04:56,120 --> 01:04:56,720 Speaker 3: he was married? 1328 01:04:56,960 --> 01:04:57,120 Speaker 2: Right? 1329 01:04:58,080 --> 01:05:00,400 Speaker 3: What was going on both you and your homegirl mind 1330 01:05:00,480 --> 01:05:02,520 Speaker 3: to even make y'all saw snooping about this man. It 1331 01:05:02,600 --> 01:05:05,680 Speaker 3: had to have been something. He's calling you in the car, 1332 01:05:06,160 --> 01:05:09,560 Speaker 3: you only talk to him certain hours. Women be fucking knowing. 1333 01:05:09,880 --> 01:05:11,160 Speaker 3: And that's why I don't. 1334 01:05:11,480 --> 01:05:13,360 Speaker 2: I don't. I don't have no empathy for you. 1335 01:05:14,000 --> 01:05:16,120 Speaker 3: I don't have no empathy for women because women we know, 1336 01:05:16,360 --> 01:05:19,919 Speaker 3: we know when a nigga fucked up, and you continue on. So, yeah, 1337 01:05:20,000 --> 01:05:23,320 Speaker 3: you're never back to the house exactly. The home rerecord 1338 01:05:23,440 --> 01:05:25,680 Speaker 3: is the motherfucker that's in the home. But bitch, you 1339 01:05:25,800 --> 01:05:28,360 Speaker 3: have some accountability in this too, because you know that 1340 01:05:28,520 --> 01:05:30,720 Speaker 3: man is married and in a relationship with somebody else. 1341 01:05:30,800 --> 01:05:34,240 Speaker 3: But women always willing to compete, like they think that 1342 01:05:34,480 --> 01:05:35,600 Speaker 3: their pussy is gold. 1343 01:05:36,560 --> 01:05:38,800 Speaker 2: So yeah, it's just attached to somebody else, that's all. 1344 01:05:39,320 --> 01:05:41,560 Speaker 6: And they want to listen to when they when the 1345 01:05:41,640 --> 01:05:44,120 Speaker 6: man like, I'm not happy with her. She don't do this, 1346 01:05:44,280 --> 01:05:44,480 Speaker 6: you know. 1347 01:05:44,560 --> 01:05:46,080 Speaker 4: You know, back in the day, the thing was, well, 1348 01:05:46,080 --> 01:05:51,400 Speaker 4: I'm staying for the kids. Your kids are thirty and forty. 1349 01:05:52,400 --> 01:05:56,680 Speaker 2: You who are you stay? Who you stand for? 1350 01:05:57,280 --> 01:05:58,600 Speaker 6: And then you have I have. 1351 01:05:58,880 --> 01:06:02,040 Speaker 4: Friends that parents married forty years and now they're getting 1352 01:06:02,080 --> 01:06:05,280 Speaker 4: a divorce because they looking at each other now and 1353 01:06:05,360 --> 01:06:07,360 Speaker 4: they're like, I don't even like you and I don't 1354 01:06:07,480 --> 01:06:10,760 Speaker 4: like you either, bit so now they're breaking up. They 1355 01:06:10,840 --> 01:06:15,920 Speaker 4: separate in like, yeah, I just feel like some some 1356 01:06:16,120 --> 01:06:20,280 Speaker 4: people they want to believe that they're better than you, 1357 01:06:20,640 --> 01:06:23,080 Speaker 4: so they believe when he's telling you, I don't want 1358 01:06:23,760 --> 01:06:25,880 Speaker 4: I'm not sexually That's what he told a girl, I'm 1359 01:06:25,920 --> 01:06:27,640 Speaker 4: not sexually attracted to her. 1360 01:06:28,040 --> 01:06:30,760 Speaker 2: You talking about your ex, I'm not fucking with you, because. 1361 01:06:30,760 --> 01:06:33,040 Speaker 4: Yeah, the same thing to me, And she's all like, 1362 01:06:33,120 --> 01:06:35,280 Speaker 4: I don't know how women let themselves go. 1363 01:06:35,480 --> 01:06:38,240 Speaker 6: I don't let themselves go. Baby, have you seen me? 1364 01:06:38,960 --> 01:06:42,840 Speaker 2: I know people be very clear, thank you. 1365 01:06:43,200 --> 01:06:43,400 Speaker 6: Yeah. 1366 01:06:43,600 --> 01:06:45,760 Speaker 4: If people ask me often like I don't know, fuck, 1367 01:06:45,840 --> 01:06:46,680 Speaker 4: did he cheating on you? 1368 01:06:46,920 --> 01:06:47,960 Speaker 2: Like I don't know right? 1369 01:06:49,160 --> 01:06:49,320 Speaker 4: Why? 1370 01:06:49,400 --> 01:06:49,560 Speaker 12: Yeah? 1371 01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:51,360 Speaker 2: I don't never have anything to do with looks. 1372 01:06:51,400 --> 01:06:53,600 Speaker 3: I got a friend of mine, like anytime she's into 1373 01:06:53,600 --> 01:06:55,160 Speaker 3: some shit with a nigga, she always like. 1374 01:06:56,880 --> 01:06:58,840 Speaker 2: Like, you should have seen this this she don't look 1375 01:06:58,880 --> 01:06:59,320 Speaker 2: nothing like me. 1376 01:06:59,400 --> 01:07:01,640 Speaker 3: But they don't have nothing to do it looks like 1377 01:07:01,760 --> 01:07:04,080 Speaker 3: you're comparing looks and like you down to this other woman. 1378 01:07:04,320 --> 01:07:07,400 Speaker 2: Really it's your nigga. You know what I'm saying to him, 1379 01:07:07,800 --> 01:07:09,520 Speaker 2: you're comparing yourself to this other woman. 1380 01:07:10,240 --> 01:07:14,520 Speaker 4: I feel like some people, not even just men or women, 1381 01:07:14,840 --> 01:07:22,040 Speaker 4: some some people both. They they're so hard on themselves 1382 01:07:23,040 --> 01:07:25,920 Speaker 4: there and they're the way they look in their bodies 1383 01:07:26,040 --> 01:07:27,479 Speaker 4: and all that that they. 1384 01:07:27,480 --> 01:07:31,560 Speaker 6: Can't believe that this person wants them. 1385 01:07:32,360 --> 01:07:35,440 Speaker 4: So it's like they mess up on purpose just to 1386 01:07:35,520 --> 01:07:38,360 Speaker 4: see maybe if this person really is gonna. 1387 01:07:38,120 --> 01:07:40,640 Speaker 6: Stay, are they gonna leave? And if you leave them, 1388 01:07:40,680 --> 01:07:42,320 Speaker 6: then it's like I knew you didn't. 1389 01:07:42,080 --> 01:07:43,320 Speaker 2: Really love me self. 1390 01:07:43,440 --> 01:07:47,840 Speaker 10: Sabotage, yes, and how I believe some people don't know 1391 01:07:48,000 --> 01:07:52,360 Speaker 10: how to live outside of being toxic, like they have 1392 01:07:52,600 --> 01:07:56,880 Speaker 10: to have it somewhere in their life or something's just 1393 01:07:57,120 --> 01:07:57,560 Speaker 10: not right. 1394 01:07:58,640 --> 01:08:01,600 Speaker 2: I agree. Yep. You talk about that, that six level 1395 01:08:01,680 --> 01:08:02,720 Speaker 2: language toxicity. 1396 01:08:05,080 --> 01:08:07,720 Speaker 4: They thrive in it, they want to stay in it. 1397 01:08:08,200 --> 01:08:10,240 Speaker 4: They don't know how to get out of it when 1398 01:08:10,280 --> 01:08:10,920 Speaker 4: you try to. 1399 01:08:10,960 --> 01:08:13,360 Speaker 6: Help them get out of it. Now you're the problem. 1400 01:08:15,120 --> 01:08:15,960 Speaker 2: Mmmm hmm. 1401 01:08:16,840 --> 01:08:18,720 Speaker 6: I just want to get back to the South and 1402 01:08:19,040 --> 01:08:19,439 Speaker 6: watch my. 1403 01:08:19,520 --> 01:08:22,920 Speaker 4: Little my my grand baby grow and have my little 1404 01:08:22,960 --> 01:08:27,720 Speaker 4: grand baby and have peace and date start dating again. 1405 01:08:29,000 --> 01:08:29,560 Speaker 6: Cautiously. 1406 01:08:31,240 --> 01:08:31,680 Speaker 2: That's right. 1407 01:08:32,840 --> 01:08:32,960 Speaker 6: Now. 1408 01:08:33,479 --> 01:08:37,000 Speaker 5: We have a segment called dump dumb Bitch Story. 1409 01:08:37,240 --> 01:08:39,400 Speaker 1: Right, well, you're telling a story, but I don't know 1410 01:08:39,479 --> 01:08:41,120 Speaker 1: if you even need to tell whatever this. 1411 01:08:42,840 --> 01:08:46,360 Speaker 2: Episode you're so dumb, you are really dumb for. 1412 01:08:48,439 --> 01:08:53,280 Speaker 3: The archives because yeah, yeah, tell us the time where 1413 01:08:53,280 --> 01:08:54,519 Speaker 3: you're the dumbest bitch. 1414 01:08:54,640 --> 01:08:56,000 Speaker 2: Like get a situation. 1415 01:08:56,880 --> 01:08:58,560 Speaker 1: All right, hold on, we're gonna go to commercial, so 1416 01:08:58,600 --> 01:08:59,920 Speaker 1: I'm gonna give you a chance to think about it. 1417 01:09:00,040 --> 01:09:01,920 Speaker 4: We're gonna go to commercial, and you tell us when 1418 01:09:01,920 --> 01:09:07,599 Speaker 4: we come back, dumb bitch story. So because we've all 1419 01:09:07,680 --> 01:09:11,840 Speaker 4: been a dumb bitch at least once or twice. Okay, 1420 01:09:12,000 --> 01:09:13,639 Speaker 4: So y'all can tell me if this is good enough 1421 01:09:13,760 --> 01:09:16,120 Speaker 4: or not. So we moved into a house. We weren't 1422 01:09:16,160 --> 01:09:19,320 Speaker 4: getting along, and one day, when he went to take 1423 01:09:19,360 --> 01:09:22,400 Speaker 4: a shower because he worked at night, I unlocked. He 1424 01:09:22,520 --> 01:09:26,240 Speaker 4: had two vehicles. I unlocked the one that he would 1425 01:09:26,400 --> 01:09:29,120 Speaker 4: leave at home. You know how you have your run 1426 01:09:29,200 --> 01:09:31,479 Speaker 4: around car and then you have your your going out car. 1427 01:09:32,040 --> 01:09:34,400 Speaker 4: So he would take his little run around car to 1428 01:09:34,520 --> 01:09:37,840 Speaker 4: work and leave his going out car. So he would, 1429 01:09:37,960 --> 01:09:40,920 Speaker 4: but he kept his keys on. One night, I unlocked 1430 01:09:40,960 --> 01:09:43,719 Speaker 4: the doors while he was in a shower, put the keyback, 1431 01:09:43,840 --> 01:09:45,800 Speaker 4: waiting until he left, and went through his car and 1432 01:09:45,880 --> 01:09:49,400 Speaker 4: found a condo, and I sent him a picture of 1433 01:09:49,520 --> 01:09:54,120 Speaker 4: and was like, you, you know, had running around here, 1434 01:09:54,280 --> 01:09:56,840 Speaker 4: you got doing whatever. Why would you need a corner? 1435 01:09:56,920 --> 01:09:57,760 Speaker 6: We don't use them. 1436 01:09:58,280 --> 01:10:01,000 Speaker 4: And he gonna tell me, whenever you found in my 1437 01:10:01,160 --> 01:10:04,680 Speaker 4: car you put there, that was the first thing. And 1438 01:10:04,840 --> 01:10:07,439 Speaker 4: then tried to tell me, well, I bought it on 1439 01:10:07,520 --> 01:10:10,840 Speaker 4: purpose so that you could see it. And then I 1440 01:10:11,040 --> 01:10:12,760 Speaker 4: was like, so you bought one content So they said 1441 01:10:12,840 --> 01:10:15,719 Speaker 4: one one condom, Yeah, I bought one. 1442 01:10:15,920 --> 01:10:22,600 Speaker 12: I said, that ain't a lucy, it ain't a loose cigarettette. 1443 01:10:23,840 --> 01:10:27,559 Speaker 12: I said okay, and stayed with him even after finding 1444 01:10:27,640 --> 01:10:28,639 Speaker 12: a condom in his car. 1445 01:10:29,600 --> 01:10:29,760 Speaker 2: MM. 1446 01:10:31,680 --> 01:10:34,920 Speaker 4: Yeah, it wasn't long after that though that I did 1447 01:10:35,120 --> 01:10:38,600 Speaker 4: leave him, But I stayed even at the finding that, Like, 1448 01:10:38,680 --> 01:10:41,240 Speaker 4: I've never found a chick in his house or anything 1449 01:10:41,400 --> 01:10:43,320 Speaker 4: like that, because at some point in time we did 1450 01:10:43,479 --> 01:10:46,240 Speaker 4: live separately A couple of times. Never went over there 1451 01:10:46,240 --> 01:10:48,200 Speaker 4: and there was a chick over there. But yep, found 1452 01:10:48,200 --> 01:10:51,800 Speaker 4: a condom, a one condom. The first time I found 1453 01:10:51,800 --> 01:10:54,479 Speaker 4: out he cheated on me, he came home from going 1454 01:10:54,520 --> 01:10:55,320 Speaker 4: out of town. 1455 01:10:55,479 --> 01:10:59,519 Speaker 6: With the box, came back and I said what and 1456 01:10:59,600 --> 01:11:03,320 Speaker 6: then try to tell me I'm holding him for a friend. Nigga, 1457 01:11:04,000 --> 01:11:09,680 Speaker 6: that's always a liar. Yeah, but how do you hold condom? O? 1458 01:11:09,880 --> 01:11:10,439 Speaker 2: My god? 1459 01:11:11,080 --> 01:11:13,400 Speaker 4: Six forty seven? I said, So, what friend is more 1460 01:11:13,479 --> 01:11:17,559 Speaker 4: important to you than your relationship? Because there's one missing 1461 01:11:18,320 --> 01:11:23,880 Speaker 4: the con machine? Well least he's using them. And why 1462 01:11:23,920 --> 01:11:25,560 Speaker 4: do you need to hold it for him? Why he 1463 01:11:25,600 --> 01:11:26,160 Speaker 4: can't hold his. 1464 01:11:28,080 --> 01:11:29,040 Speaker 6: You need to hold its? 1465 01:11:29,120 --> 01:11:31,280 Speaker 4: Why that excuse even came out to your mouth? Like 1466 01:11:31,360 --> 01:11:33,599 Speaker 4: do you know how dumb you sound right now? You're 1467 01:11:33,640 --> 01:11:36,920 Speaker 4: holding condoms for a friend, but you have a girlfriend, right, 1468 01:11:40,080 --> 01:11:43,080 Speaker 4: So yeah, those were both they They're probably more, but 1469 01:11:43,200 --> 01:11:45,920 Speaker 4: those were fund The Connors part is real dumb and shit. 1470 01:11:45,800 --> 01:11:46,960 Speaker 6: Like girl shame. 1471 01:11:47,800 --> 01:11:49,400 Speaker 2: This was not that long ago. This might have been 1472 01:11:49,439 --> 01:11:50,400 Speaker 2: earlier this year. Child. 1473 01:11:50,760 --> 01:11:52,519 Speaker 3: The guy who I was eating came home and we 1474 01:11:52,840 --> 01:11:54,200 Speaker 3: I was at his house and we were about to 1475 01:11:54,240 --> 01:11:57,280 Speaker 3: go out to eat, but he had like not unpacked 1476 01:11:57,360 --> 01:12:00,479 Speaker 3: his bag from being out, big dumb box for condoms 1477 01:12:00,520 --> 01:12:01,479 Speaker 3: in that suitcase. 1478 01:12:02,520 --> 01:12:05,320 Speaker 2: I just look like I haven't even seen it, but yeah, 1479 01:12:05,520 --> 01:12:08,480 Speaker 2: like no, nigga, you was out out of town smashing 1480 01:12:08,800 --> 01:12:12,479 Speaker 2: a lot, open box were missing. Nah. 1481 01:12:12,560 --> 01:12:14,599 Speaker 3: I didn't even say nothing about it until months later, 1482 01:12:14,640 --> 01:12:17,120 Speaker 3: because you know, listen, just in case you catch me 1483 01:12:17,240 --> 01:12:17,880 Speaker 3: or some whole ship. 1484 01:12:17,960 --> 01:12:19,920 Speaker 2: I ain't saying nothing about your whole ship. 1485 01:12:20,840 --> 01:12:22,559 Speaker 5: Because y'all wasn't like together together. 1486 01:12:23,880 --> 01:12:26,240 Speaker 3: But st we've definitely was having sex with a condom. 1487 01:12:26,880 --> 01:12:29,200 Speaker 3: So I'm just happy to see him fucking somebody else 1488 01:12:29,240 --> 01:12:32,040 Speaker 3: with one. Yeah, so I was just tripping for real. 1489 01:12:32,640 --> 01:12:34,160 Speaker 3: I would make a music with me too. 1490 01:12:36,960 --> 01:12:40,240 Speaker 6: Like you have any fondoms that stops some writing in motion? 1491 01:12:40,560 --> 01:12:40,880 Speaker 4: Like what. 1492 01:12:43,479 --> 01:12:48,800 Speaker 2: Pull one of those out there boxing your suitcase? I 1493 01:12:48,800 --> 01:12:53,639 Speaker 2: don't have it in that box over there. I want 1494 01:12:53,720 --> 01:12:55,320 Speaker 2: to know, what are you doing? 1495 01:12:55,439 --> 01:12:57,439 Speaker 3: Now to heal, because I actually about the book you 1496 01:12:57,479 --> 01:13:01,640 Speaker 3: said that really wasn't how it wasn't really that therapeutic 1497 01:13:01,680 --> 01:13:03,200 Speaker 3: for you, you know, having to relive the things. 1498 01:13:03,240 --> 01:13:05,320 Speaker 2: So what are some of the things you're doing to 1499 01:13:05,520 --> 01:13:06,639 Speaker 2: heal to our listeners? 1500 01:13:06,680 --> 01:13:08,360 Speaker 3: And note, because I'm pretty you're not the only person 1501 01:13:08,439 --> 01:13:10,400 Speaker 3: that went through all this dumb this shit we've been 1502 01:13:10,680 --> 01:13:12,240 Speaker 3: through to not as extensive. 1503 01:13:12,360 --> 01:13:18,560 Speaker 4: But I had to sit and first I had to 1504 01:13:18,600 --> 01:13:23,120 Speaker 4: figure out what I wanted, because unfortunately, some people that 1505 01:13:23,240 --> 01:13:27,160 Speaker 4: go through these things they don't some of them don't 1506 01:13:27,400 --> 01:13:30,479 Speaker 4: want or don't know how to get out of it, 1507 01:13:30,520 --> 01:13:34,320 Speaker 4: and not to not just physically or financially, emotionally and 1508 01:13:34,640 --> 01:13:39,280 Speaker 4: mentally because you're like, you're thinking about what's next, what's 1509 01:13:39,360 --> 01:13:42,080 Speaker 4: out there? Well, if I leave him, then what And 1510 01:13:42,200 --> 01:13:46,360 Speaker 4: then you start, sadly enough, thinking about, well I don't 1511 01:13:46,400 --> 01:13:47,840 Speaker 4: want him to be with someone else. 1512 01:13:47,920 --> 01:13:48,720 Speaker 6: Now I didn't think that. 1513 01:13:48,880 --> 01:13:50,960 Speaker 4: I was like, please let him be with somebody else, 1514 01:13:51,000 --> 01:13:53,280 Speaker 4: because she's gonna be miserable as fun. 1515 01:13:54,120 --> 01:13:55,439 Speaker 6: But for me, it was. 1516 01:13:57,160 --> 01:13:58,800 Speaker 2: How do you move on? 1517 01:13:59,080 --> 01:14:01,080 Speaker 6: Like, how do you put the pieces together? What do 1518 01:14:01,160 --> 01:14:03,799 Speaker 6: you do now? We had a dog, we have a house. 1519 01:14:04,320 --> 01:14:06,240 Speaker 6: My daughter, this was her first. 1520 01:14:08,000 --> 01:14:11,000 Speaker 4: Year out here as far as the school, and she 1521 01:14:11,200 --> 01:14:14,679 Speaker 4: had behavioral issues and problems in school, and I wanted 1522 01:14:14,760 --> 01:14:18,400 Speaker 4: to offer her the stability of going to like the 1523 01:14:18,520 --> 01:14:21,519 Speaker 4: same school and not different schools every year like she's 1524 01:14:21,640 --> 01:14:22,160 Speaker 4: been doing. 1525 01:14:22,800 --> 01:14:25,560 Speaker 6: So then I'm like, damn, like how what what do 1526 01:14:25,760 --> 01:14:29,920 Speaker 6: I do? And why? I was just like, you know what, 1527 01:14:31,560 --> 01:14:35,760 Speaker 6: I can't live unhappy. When he's not home, You're wondering who. 1528 01:14:35,800 --> 01:14:39,160 Speaker 4: He's with, what he's doing, how long he gonna be there. 1529 01:14:39,760 --> 01:14:42,960 Speaker 4: If he comes home two hours after he's left, You're like, oh, 1530 01:14:43,000 --> 01:14:45,160 Speaker 4: he must have been with somebody else. He leaves out with, 1531 01:14:45,479 --> 01:14:48,040 Speaker 4: you know, cologne smelling good and his clothes on. 1532 01:14:48,240 --> 01:14:51,519 Speaker 6: You're like, oh, okay, so you still out here living 1533 01:14:51,600 --> 01:14:53,320 Speaker 6: your life. I can't live like that. 1534 01:14:53,960 --> 01:14:57,599 Speaker 4: So even if it means starting over and you're alone 1535 01:14:57,800 --> 01:15:00,040 Speaker 4: for a little bit, I've rather had that then, and 1536 01:15:00,600 --> 01:15:04,840 Speaker 4: my mind betraying me and thinking things, And you know, 1537 01:15:04,960 --> 01:15:08,080 Speaker 4: your mind can turn against you when you're you're already 1538 01:15:08,120 --> 01:15:11,679 Speaker 4: in a state and you're thinking about what someone else 1539 01:15:11,800 --> 01:15:15,000 Speaker 4: is doing, what they could be doing, like you are 1540 01:15:15,680 --> 01:15:20,040 Speaker 4: capable of breaking yourself apart. The other person did what 1541 01:15:20,160 --> 01:15:24,400 Speaker 4: they did, but the after effect of it is on you. 1542 01:15:25,439 --> 01:15:29,200 Speaker 4: So I had to start thinking about myself when my daughter. 1543 01:15:29,240 --> 01:15:31,160 Speaker 4: When I found out my daughter was pregnant. And it's 1544 01:15:31,160 --> 01:15:34,519 Speaker 4: funny because I found out from Amazon because she ordered 1545 01:15:34,560 --> 01:15:38,000 Speaker 4: some prenatal pills and they sent a notification that they 1546 01:15:38,040 --> 01:15:40,400 Speaker 4: were having trouble making her delivery. 1547 01:15:40,840 --> 01:15:42,680 Speaker 6: And I call her like, is it something you want 1548 01:15:42,720 --> 01:15:44,360 Speaker 6: to tell me? And she was like, why are you 1549 01:15:44,479 --> 01:15:45,040 Speaker 6: asking me that? 1550 01:15:45,120 --> 01:15:47,439 Speaker 4: I said, because Amazon's trying to get you your prenatal 1551 01:15:47,560 --> 01:15:51,320 Speaker 4: pills and they can't get them to you. You're pregnant girl, 1552 01:15:51,680 --> 01:15:54,200 Speaker 4: She was like. She started laughing, and I madebe and 1553 01:15:54,280 --> 01:15:57,240 Speaker 4: she went into all that. So I'm like, oh, this 1554 01:15:57,479 --> 01:16:01,920 Speaker 4: is definitely the sign I needed that something better is coming. 1555 01:16:02,600 --> 01:16:04,840 Speaker 4: I didn't want to sell my house. That wasn't in 1556 01:16:04,920 --> 01:16:08,320 Speaker 4: the plan. And I had to tell myself with that 1557 01:16:08,479 --> 01:16:12,439 Speaker 4: as well, like sometimes your plans aren't your plans, They're 1558 01:16:12,479 --> 01:16:16,559 Speaker 4: not the plans God has for you. And when this happened, 1559 01:16:16,600 --> 01:16:19,920 Speaker 4: I felt, you know, a little shaken the earth because 1560 01:16:19,960 --> 01:16:21,720 Speaker 4: I'm like, well, what do I do? 1561 01:16:21,920 --> 01:16:22,800 Speaker 6: How do I move on? 1562 01:16:23,840 --> 01:16:27,360 Speaker 4: And I prayed and I said to God, you must 1563 01:16:27,400 --> 01:16:30,400 Speaker 4: have a purpose for me. I'm gonna keep pushing on 1564 01:16:30,800 --> 01:16:35,519 Speaker 4: until that purpose is revealed. Put my house on the market. 1565 01:16:35,680 --> 01:16:40,160 Speaker 6: Called my real estate agent, like, look, how can I 1566 01:16:40,240 --> 01:16:43,439 Speaker 6: how much can we get for this house? She came over, 1567 01:16:43,600 --> 01:16:46,080 Speaker 6: She's looking around. She's like, you sure you want to 1568 01:16:46,240 --> 01:16:48,439 Speaker 6: sell it. I'm like, I don't have a choice. 1569 01:16:49,520 --> 01:16:55,120 Speaker 4: I need all ties cut talk to different attorneys. Maryland law, 1570 01:16:55,240 --> 01:17:00,360 Speaker 4: Pennsylvania law, totally different. Pennsylvania consernedos married, So I have 1571 01:17:00,479 --> 01:17:04,959 Speaker 4: to file for divorce here. Maryland considers us and considers 1572 01:17:05,040 --> 01:17:07,080 Speaker 4: it bigger me, so I would have to. I can 1573 01:17:07,120 --> 01:17:10,200 Speaker 4: file for an annulment and they avoid the marriage. It's 1574 01:17:10,240 --> 01:17:12,080 Speaker 4: a whole mess. So I'm like, okay, I'm gonna sell 1575 01:17:12,160 --> 01:17:15,800 Speaker 4: this house and then we won't have property in Pennsylvania 1576 01:17:15,840 --> 01:17:18,240 Speaker 4: and then I can file for my annoyment and marriage 1577 01:17:18,360 --> 01:17:19,439 Speaker 4: and Maryland. 1578 01:17:20,080 --> 01:17:21,960 Speaker 6: So I've repurposed the plan. 1579 01:17:22,080 --> 01:17:25,960 Speaker 4: I changed it and I and the plan is probably 1580 01:17:26,080 --> 01:17:28,599 Speaker 4: only for it like this month and this month, this month, 1581 01:17:28,640 --> 01:17:29,640 Speaker 4: because sometimes. 1582 01:17:29,320 --> 01:17:31,400 Speaker 6: We make a plan for four or five six years. 1583 01:17:31,439 --> 01:17:33,920 Speaker 4: You ever meet someone there like, what's your plan for 1584 01:17:33,960 --> 01:17:37,439 Speaker 4: the next five years? It's okay not to have one. Oh, 1585 01:17:37,560 --> 01:17:39,320 Speaker 4: my own girl just asked me that the other day, 1586 01:17:39,320 --> 01:17:39,640 Speaker 4: and I was. 1587 01:17:39,680 --> 01:17:44,280 Speaker 2: Like, girl, I don't know, I don't know. Five years 1588 01:17:44,439 --> 01:17:48,400 Speaker 2: is just you know, a lock. It happened the present. 1589 01:17:48,800 --> 01:17:52,600 Speaker 6: Yeah, let's where about today and tomorrow, in the in 1590 01:17:52,680 --> 01:17:55,560 Speaker 6: the weekends, and let's let's let's tackle that. 1591 01:17:56,920 --> 01:18:01,320 Speaker 4: So once I, you know, revamped the plan, I started 1592 01:18:01,360 --> 01:18:03,559 Speaker 4: to feel better. And every day is not a good day. 1593 01:18:03,640 --> 01:18:07,200 Speaker 4: Some days my mom reminds me of the dumb shit 1594 01:18:09,120 --> 01:18:13,280 Speaker 4: and where I am and how I got here. But 1595 01:18:13,400 --> 01:18:17,080 Speaker 4: when you know, I stopped trying to plan everything and 1596 01:18:18,760 --> 01:18:23,000 Speaker 4: make everything go my way, or stop trying to figure out. 1597 01:18:22,960 --> 01:18:24,200 Speaker 2: How I got there. 1598 01:18:24,720 --> 01:18:28,240 Speaker 4: Yeah, when you just let it go, it's like a 1599 01:18:28,439 --> 01:18:32,479 Speaker 4: calm comes and you're like, Okay, this is what I 1600 01:18:32,600 --> 01:18:32,960 Speaker 4: need to do. 1601 01:18:33,080 --> 01:18:35,600 Speaker 6: You're down for a little bit, you're crying, You're depressed. 1602 01:18:35,680 --> 01:18:37,599 Speaker 6: I can't go on, I don't want to live. 1603 01:18:37,720 --> 01:18:40,000 Speaker 4: All that stuff comes into play, But at some point 1604 01:18:40,040 --> 01:18:43,160 Speaker 4: in the time you got like, look, you've cried, you've 1605 01:18:43,200 --> 01:18:44,800 Speaker 4: been sad, you've been depressed. 1606 01:18:44,880 --> 01:18:45,560 Speaker 6: What are you gonna do? 1607 01:18:45,680 --> 01:18:45,800 Speaker 10: Now? 1608 01:18:47,120 --> 01:18:50,280 Speaker 6: You have to get up and you have to do something. 1609 01:18:51,280 --> 01:18:54,280 Speaker 4: And my something was okay, house on the market, get 1610 01:18:54,360 --> 01:18:57,040 Speaker 4: a profit from that, move back to the South, help 1611 01:18:57,120 --> 01:19:00,600 Speaker 4: my daughter with my first grand baby, Maybe open a 1612 01:19:00,640 --> 01:19:04,840 Speaker 4: couple of businesses. I have my esthetics license, Maybe get 1613 01:19:04,920 --> 01:19:08,240 Speaker 4: back into that our work. I can retire in January, 1614 01:19:08,479 --> 01:19:12,439 Speaker 4: like a lot of things I'm preparing for that don't 1615 01:19:12,479 --> 01:19:13,640 Speaker 4: include highs. 1616 01:19:14,920 --> 01:19:15,360 Speaker 2: Period. 1617 01:19:15,800 --> 01:19:24,320 Speaker 3: Okay, absolutely absolutely, y'all cop the book Okay, How I 1618 01:19:24,840 --> 01:19:29,920 Speaker 3: Married a Vegas. Okay, there it goes, y'all. It's gonna 1619 01:19:29,920 --> 01:19:33,040 Speaker 3: be New York Times bestseller from your list to God's end. 1620 01:19:33,560 --> 01:19:35,280 Speaker 4: Where can you find the book? Tell them where they 1621 01:19:35,280 --> 01:19:37,120 Speaker 4: can find your book at so you can order my 1622 01:19:37,240 --> 01:19:42,479 Speaker 4: book on my website, The Creative Baldgirl dot com. 1623 01:19:42,680 --> 01:19:48,160 Speaker 6: Traditional spelling of all the words why and girl. Just 1624 01:19:48,479 --> 01:19:51,280 Speaker 6: the Creative Baldgirl dot com. 1625 01:19:53,040 --> 01:19:55,160 Speaker 2: All right, wait, hold on, let up. 1626 01:19:55,200 --> 01:20:00,240 Speaker 3: Let our listeners know wherever they can reach you at Instagram, Twitter, whatever. 1627 01:20:00,160 --> 01:20:05,040 Speaker 4: Yes, follow me on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook, The Creative. 1628 01:20:04,600 --> 01:20:08,720 Speaker 6: Ball Girl is my my user name on all of them. 1629 01:20:09,160 --> 01:20:11,680 Speaker 4: Follow me on TikTok because I hear TikTok is the 1630 01:20:11,760 --> 01:20:15,240 Speaker 4: thing now and I need some TikTok shacks, Tani. I 1631 01:20:15,360 --> 01:20:19,880 Speaker 4: need them some thousands, honey, So follow me on TikTok. 1632 01:20:20,479 --> 01:20:23,880 Speaker 4: I'm gonna start hopefully doing contents. People say, girl, you 1633 01:20:23,960 --> 01:20:27,599 Speaker 4: gotta get people some content, get some followers. Okay, I'm 1634 01:20:27,640 --> 01:20:30,000 Speaker 4: gonna try. I'm gonna try. I got some you know, 1635 01:20:30,160 --> 01:20:34,120 Speaker 4: doing my little content calendar and stuff, and yeah, trying 1636 01:20:34,160 --> 01:20:38,320 Speaker 4: to get in some bookstores, some local black owned bookstores, 1637 01:20:38,640 --> 01:20:39,759 Speaker 4: do some book tours. 1638 01:20:41,040 --> 01:20:43,719 Speaker 6: You know, y'all probably see me walking around Charlotte. 1639 01:20:43,760 --> 01:20:51,160 Speaker 2: Hey, hey girl, I have a rise. I'm back dollar period. 1640 01:20:52,040 --> 01:20:55,519 Speaker 2: I love it all right, y'all. Thank you so much, 1641 01:20:55,560 --> 01:20:56,120 Speaker 2: Sean for. 1642 01:20:59,160 --> 01:20:59,719 Speaker 5: That was great. 1643 01:21:00,040 --> 01:21:02,320 Speaker 3: All right, y'all listen. So if you enjoy this episode 1644 01:21:02,520 --> 01:21:05,200 Speaker 3: and all the dumb shit, y'all, tune in every Thursday 1645 01:21:05,760 --> 01:21:08,920 Speaker 3: on the iHeartRadio app wherever the fuck you get your 1646 01:21:09,000 --> 01:21:12,400 Speaker 3: podcasts at this your co host aj Holiday two point oh, 1647 01:21:12,479 --> 01:21:13,840 Speaker 3: y'all follow me down if you won't get on. 1648 01:21:14,040 --> 01:21:17,240 Speaker 5: What's Up Tam, y'all is official, Tam Bam. I love y'all. 1649 01:21:17,240 --> 01:21:18,040 Speaker 4: Thank you for tuning in. 1650 01:21:18,200 --> 01:21:20,639 Speaker 2: Remember to speak now and never hold them niggas. 1651 01:21:20,680 --> 01:21:23,599 Speaker 3: Oh okay, girl, get the fuck up early and soon 1652 01:21:23,840 --> 01:21:24,720 Speaker 3: y'all have a good day. 1653 01:21:24,760 --> 01:21:25,679 Speaker 2: God bless later