WEBVTT - Poop Festival 0:00:02.240 --> 0:00:05.680 If you thought four hours a day, minutes a week 0:00:05.800 --> 0:00:09.240 was enough, I think again. He's the last remnants of 0:00:09.240 --> 0:00:12.879 the old republic, a sole fashion of fairness. He treats 0:00:12.920 --> 0:00:15.760 crackheads in the ghetto gutter the same as the rich 0:00:15.840 --> 0:00:20.200 pill poppers in the penthouse, the clearing house of hot takes, 0:00:20.280 --> 0:00:24.080 break free or something special. The Fifth Hour, which Ben 0:00:24.120 --> 0:00:28.040 Maller starts right now. That it does, and we are 0:00:28.160 --> 0:00:31.920 in the air everywhere, Do not be hoodwinked, Do not 0:00:32.040 --> 0:00:35.440 be bamboozled or hornswoggle. This is the real McCoy here 0:00:35.560 --> 0:00:39.960 for your weekend listening pleasure. Plausibly, it's about sports, but 0:00:40.080 --> 0:00:42.279 let's be honest here, the Fifth Hour has morphed into 0:00:42.360 --> 0:00:44.760 something else. I don't know if that's good or not, 0:00:45.400 --> 0:00:48.760 but it is loosely related to the sporting world. And really, 0:00:48.840 --> 0:00:51.560 what I've determined here is that we only talk about 0:00:51.600 --> 0:00:54.760 sports when there's nothing else to talk about. We we 0:00:54.880 --> 0:00:57.320 then begin with sports, and one of the reasons for 0:00:57.360 --> 0:00:59.680 that I will explain here in a second. But we 0:00:59.720 --> 0:01:03.520 are available here in the air everywhere, the vast power 0:01:04.280 --> 0:01:08.640 of I Hearts Podcast Network available, as you know because 0:01:08.640 --> 0:01:11.680 you're listening right now wherever you get your podcast, to 0:01:11.800 --> 0:01:14.080 tell a friend, Tell a friend, tell a friend, subscribe 0:01:14.120 --> 0:01:16.800 to the podcast. One minute. That's all we ask. You 0:01:16.800 --> 0:01:18.400 can be the one minute man. You'll be a hero. 0:01:18.640 --> 0:01:20.200 You know, another walks of life. If you're the one 0:01:20.240 --> 0:01:22.560 minute man, you're not a hero in this. You're a 0:01:22.560 --> 0:01:24.640 hero because all we need is one minute. That's it. 0:01:24.800 --> 0:01:27.760 One good minute. And I know this is mind boggling, 0:01:28.080 --> 0:01:31.160 but one good minute and we get credit and that's 0:01:31.160 --> 0:01:33.920 all we need. So that's that's it. We just need 0:01:33.959 --> 0:01:36.520 a minute of your time, download the podcast, subscribed to 0:01:36.560 --> 0:01:39.560 the podcast, and that we'll keep doing the podcast. Maybe 0:01:39.560 --> 0:01:41.400 we'll even get paid for it at some point. Now 0:01:41.720 --> 0:01:44.759 I do this with someone who is Public Enemy number one, 0:01:45.400 --> 0:01:48.280 a heathen. He's like a pariah. He might as well 0:01:48.360 --> 0:01:53.240 play for the Astros. David Gascon, who is here. He 0:01:53.280 --> 0:01:55.559 got his cards. Hold, we'll talk more about that later. 0:01:55.600 --> 0:02:00.320 Hello Gascon, I'm you know what. I went to talk 0:02:00.360 --> 0:02:02.800 a healthy amount of sports. We try to intertwine it though, 0:02:02.840 --> 0:02:06.960 because unlike your show, which is strictly sticking to sports, 0:02:06.960 --> 0:02:09.600 otherwise guys get triggered. We try to go off the 0:02:09.639 --> 0:02:11.959 beaten path a little bit. We have a little spice 0:02:12.040 --> 0:02:14.680 and variety and some humor and some stories behind everything 0:02:14.680 --> 0:02:17.120 we do here. So you know it's a mix and match. 0:02:17.160 --> 0:02:19.839 But you've got it all week long anyway, right, So yeah, 0:02:19.840 --> 0:02:21.799 well I do save some stuff, Like I mean, there's 0:02:21.840 --> 0:02:23.600 some of the personal stuff. I feel like this is 0:02:23.639 --> 0:02:27.040 for the hardcore hard oh group, you know what I mean. 0:02:27.080 --> 0:02:29.400 Like this is like a special group here that listen 0:02:29.440 --> 0:02:31.400 to this. These are like the top one percent of 0:02:31.440 --> 0:02:34.320 the Mallet militia that download the Fifth Hour. Because it's 0:02:34.320 --> 0:02:38.920 not the radio podcast goes to everybody. This podcast is 0:02:39.080 --> 0:02:41.560 you gotta like search around for it a little bit. Yeah, 0:02:41.560 --> 0:02:45.600 but we we have it housed on your your site 0:02:45.720 --> 0:02:48.880 for Fox Sports Radio, so it is it is right 0:02:48.919 --> 0:02:51.880 there embedded with everything else throughout the week. So it 0:02:51.960 --> 0:02:53.880 just caps off the week. It's a cherry on top 0:02:54.000 --> 0:02:56.560 for the for the people like a little color in 0:02:56.600 --> 0:02:59.839 their life. Yeah. Anyway, So as far as what's coming 0:02:59.919 --> 0:03:02.919 up up on this podcast, we have the gall bladder 0:03:02.960 --> 0:03:08.880 punching Back, Costco dust Up, the King of All Douchebags 0:03:09.520 --> 0:03:13.000 grab Bag, and we also have study This and I 0:03:13.040 --> 0:03:15.320 assume we'll also do you know, don't stick to sports 0:03:15.360 --> 0:03:17.800 time permitting. Of course, we got some really good studies 0:03:17.840 --> 0:03:19.880 this week. I feel now it's just gonna be one 0:03:19.960 --> 0:03:22.520 podcast or two podcast this week. What are we looking at? 0:03:22.840 --> 0:03:25.880 We'll do one? I mean we he really pushed it 0:03:26.000 --> 0:03:29.560 last week. I felt like I feel like it needed 0:03:29.560 --> 0:03:32.160 a meal and maybe some water and a towel after 0:03:32.320 --> 0:03:34.040 having to do all that hard labor last week. For 0:03:34.120 --> 0:03:36.520 it wasn't hunting. A lot of hard labor. Was wanting 0:03:36.560 --> 0:03:38.720 to sit in your ass so you can get hemorrhoids 0:03:38.760 --> 0:03:40.560 from talking. I mean, you didn't even talk that much. 0:03:40.600 --> 0:03:42.120 I'm the one that talked. I have to carry the 0:03:42.120 --> 0:03:46.000 water up the hills. The type people talk during your 0:03:46.040 --> 0:03:48.360 shows or during your podcast your bitch and moan about 0:03:48.360 --> 0:03:50.920 it like this is mine, my name's on it. I'm 0:03:50.920 --> 0:03:53.960 the headliner here, I'm the showcase right out of com 0:03:54.040 --> 0:03:56.560 press release for me and have only my name attached 0:03:56.600 --> 0:03:59.320 to it. That's Ben Mellay. Well, you gotta know that 0:03:59.360 --> 0:04:03.160 you're the old I'm the alpha, and that's in this relationship. 0:04:03.360 --> 0:04:06.480 I'm the alpha dog, all right, and I am marking 0:04:06.480 --> 0:04:09.760 my territory, urinating all over the podcast is what I'm doing. 0:04:09.800 --> 0:04:12.400 You're more like the queen and I'm like Commander Bond. 0:04:12.480 --> 0:04:14.800 I just you know I'm here, God save the Queen, 0:04:14.800 --> 0:04:16.760 and here I am for you. Yeah, you know the 0:04:17.600 --> 0:04:20.359 term there's a thing called the centaur, which combines a 0:04:20.400 --> 0:04:22.039 man and a horse. But what happens when you combine 0:04:22.040 --> 0:04:23.960 a man and a donkey? What do you call that? 0:04:23.960 --> 0:04:26.000 Because that would be you, that would be with you. 0:04:26.279 --> 0:04:29.000 I am the citadel for your little your little Kate 0:04:29.080 --> 0:04:31.360 crusade throughout this journey. If you're about as good as 0:04:31.400 --> 0:04:36.800 the citadel basketball time. This football team, what's that? Or 0:04:36.839 --> 0:04:39.400 the football team or the football team, either way? Exactly? 0:04:39.440 --> 0:04:42.160 All right, let's let's get into it. Is my man 0:04:42.279 --> 0:04:47.640 marcelu would say, this wonderful, glorious weekend as we have 0:04:47.839 --> 0:04:51.359 the last full weekend of February, right, this is it. 0:04:51.440 --> 0:04:54.000 And then next weekend you got that that gazzy twenty 0:04:54.080 --> 0:04:55.760 ninth day, and then we go into March after that. 0:04:55.800 --> 0:04:58.520 All right, so the gall bladder punches back. Now, this 0:04:58.560 --> 0:05:00.600 is a story I was debating whether or not to tell. 0:05:01.040 --> 0:05:03.320 I did not tell it on the radio. It is 0:05:03.360 --> 0:05:08.520 tremendously humiliating, It is tremendously unbelievably ridiculous. What has happened 0:05:08.520 --> 0:05:11.320 to me? But I figured, since this is only for 0:05:11.360 --> 0:05:14.520 the one percent that listened to the Fifth Hour podcast. 0:05:14.640 --> 0:05:18.120 I I thought it was would be perfect. So a 0:05:18.120 --> 0:05:22.120 little little backstory for you. Prologue, I believe, is that 0:05:22.120 --> 0:05:27.200 what I call it. So last November I started feeling 0:05:27.480 --> 0:05:31.080 under the weather and I thought I was having, um, 0:05:31.120 --> 0:05:35.640 a little case of heartburn hartburn. So I thought I 0:05:35.640 --> 0:05:37.920 had some heartburn. And uh, you know, I'm a bit 0:05:37.960 --> 0:05:39.800 of a workhorse. I don't like to take time off. 0:05:39.839 --> 0:05:43.040 I don't know, I say, I just power through. I 0:05:42.440 --> 0:05:45.240 I learned to have a little bit of grit. You 0:05:45.360 --> 0:05:47.640 have a little grit in life, and so I tried 0:05:47.680 --> 0:05:50.599 to power through. I ended up in the hospital and 0:05:50.680 --> 0:05:54.160 they shot me up with morphine and they realized right 0:05:54.160 --> 0:05:57.000 away that I was having a gall stone attack. And 0:05:57.080 --> 0:06:02.640 so on November three, I had my gall bladder chopped 0:06:02.640 --> 0:06:04.720 out of me. I had some emergency surgery. I was 0:06:04.760 --> 0:06:07.120 in the hospital for like a week because my goal 0:06:07.200 --> 0:06:11.040 bladder was really bad. Um And and the thing is like, 0:06:11.080 --> 0:06:13.839 since this has happened, here we are in late February, 0:06:13.920 --> 0:06:18.120 it really has not affected my life other than I 0:06:18.200 --> 0:06:20.560 have some gnarly scars. I mean, if you're looking at 0:06:20.600 --> 0:06:22.200 me with my shirt off, that's bad. Anyway, but it 0:06:22.240 --> 0:06:23.919 looks even worse now because I got some scars on 0:06:23.920 --> 0:06:27.000 my chest where they chopped me open. And but it 0:06:27.120 --> 0:06:32.000 changed this week alright, So on Wednesday, why was Wednesday 0:06:32.040 --> 0:06:34.120 different than all of the night saw? On Wednesday Show? 0:06:34.160 --> 0:06:36.960 I ended up I fast during the week. I usually 0:06:37.000 --> 0:06:41.440 eat like one meal on Sunday afternoon. I tried to 0:06:41.480 --> 0:06:44.080 eat Sunday afternoon. I don't eat Sunday night, don't eat 0:06:44.120 --> 0:06:49.960 Monday at all, don't eat Tuesday until like Tuesday night typically. Um, 0:06:50.000 --> 0:06:53.680 but sometimes I'll skipped to uh to Wednesday. But anyway, 0:06:53.680 --> 0:06:55.960 so this week I skipped a couple days on Wednesday show. 0:06:56.160 --> 0:06:59.240 So Tuesday into Wednesday, which is Wednesday Show, I end 0:06:59.320 --> 0:07:01.240 up breaking my asket, and I broke it a little 0:07:01.320 --> 0:07:05.680 later than normal. Um, my wife very kindly cooked up 0:07:05.720 --> 0:07:09.720 a delicious meal of grilled chicken and uh it was 0:07:09.840 --> 0:07:12.280 kind of an Asian dish with some rice noodles, and 0:07:12.360 --> 0:07:16.080 that was wonderful, very delicious, yell meat to my tummy. 0:07:17.120 --> 0:07:20.040 But what I've learned is with the gallbladder here, when 0:07:20.040 --> 0:07:22.800 you fast and then you you know, you go a 0:07:22.800 --> 0:07:25.400 couple of days without eating and then you eat, you 0:07:25.520 --> 0:07:28.160 generally have to go to the bathroom within thirty or 0:07:28.280 --> 0:07:31.920 ninety minutes, and there's no controlling it. It's life without 0:07:32.000 --> 0:07:35.000 a gallbladder. So if you have your gallbladder, be be appreciative. 0:07:35.720 --> 0:07:38.240 So so here here's the point of the story. So 0:07:38.280 --> 0:07:41.400 I knew I knew at some point I was going 0:07:41.440 --> 0:07:44.000 to have to spend some time on the throne. I 0:07:44.080 --> 0:07:45.720 knew that, and I had eaten a little later than 0:07:45.760 --> 0:07:49.840 I wanted to. But here's the problem. That part didn't 0:07:49.880 --> 0:07:52.240 really that part hasn't really impacted my life. So but 0:07:53.040 --> 0:07:54.480 I had to leave to go to work. I got 0:07:54.480 --> 0:07:57.200 a long drive to go into the Geico Fox Sports 0:07:57.280 --> 0:08:01.440 Radio studios. So I make the drive problem. I go 0:08:01.600 --> 0:08:03.960 to work and I'm like, oh wait, maybe I don't 0:08:04.000 --> 0:08:06.160 have to go to the bathroom now. Maybe everything's good. 0:08:06.440 --> 0:08:09.320 Maybe I'm all right, Maybe this is I've moved past 0:08:09.400 --> 0:08:12.320 this and I'm fine. So I'm in my little booth. 0:08:12.360 --> 0:08:15.560 They're getting ready for the show, doing some copious research 0:08:15.600 --> 0:08:19.600 for the for the show that night, and about thirty 0:08:19.640 --> 0:08:23.360 minutes before we're scheduled to go on the air, I 0:08:23.480 --> 0:08:26.560 get that feeling. We've all had that feeling. It's called 0:08:26.600 --> 0:08:31.680 the runs, all right, Now, I immediately stop, I drop 0:08:31.800 --> 0:08:35.920 what I'm doing. I then made an executive decision which 0:08:36.000 --> 0:08:39.000 I would end up regretting get backfired, that I was 0:08:39.080 --> 0:08:41.360 going to use. I was not going to use the 0:08:41.400 --> 0:08:44.760 bathroom downstairs because we've got a bunch of animals that 0:08:44.800 --> 0:08:48.480 work in our building and I would rather I would 0:08:48.559 --> 0:08:51.560 rather use a public bathroom outside a whorehouse than the 0:08:51.600 --> 0:08:55.400 bathroom that we use on a regular basis, because people 0:08:55.440 --> 0:08:58.200 are disgusting and you know, as as Dion Sanders ranted 0:08:58.240 --> 0:09:01.360 this week, guy's aim all over the US. So what 0:09:01.480 --> 0:09:04.280 I did, guess Hunt, I said, you know what I'm 0:09:04.280 --> 0:09:07.840 gonna do. I'm gonna go to the corporate offices of 0:09:07.880 --> 0:09:11.160 the Premier Networks. I am gonna go into the main building. 0:09:11.160 --> 0:09:13.160 I'm gonna take the elevator because I know the time 0:09:13.200 --> 0:09:15.719 they clean the bathrooms by the time I get there. 0:09:15.760 --> 0:09:18.000 The cleaning clue crew in the building, the main We 0:09:18.000 --> 0:09:19.880 don't have a cleaning crew in our building, but in 0:09:19.920 --> 0:09:23.200 their building, they clean everything in that that place, that 0:09:23.240 --> 0:09:25.439 part of the building by the time I get there. 0:09:25.679 --> 0:09:27.280 So I'm like, I'm gonna go in there, I'm gonna 0:09:27.320 --> 0:09:31.320 have a clean bathroom. Everything will be great. And this 0:09:31.400 --> 0:09:35.160 is where all the executives who pay Sean Hannity, Rush Limbaugh, 0:09:35.240 --> 0:09:38.439 Steve Harvey, Ryan Seacrest, all these big stars at Premiere. 0:09:39.880 --> 0:09:43.280 The corporate headquarters, the Global Center is right here, but 0:09:43.360 --> 0:09:45.720 at night it's empty, and I have access to it, 0:09:45.840 --> 0:09:49.120 and it's got a really cool bathroom. So I'm like, 0:09:49.160 --> 0:09:51.800 all right, I'm gonna do this. So I'm walking through 0:09:51.840 --> 0:09:53.920 the courtyard now. I happened to walk out with wreck 0:09:53.960 --> 0:09:57.600 Itt Ralph, which was a problem because he delayed me 0:09:57.960 --> 0:10:00.559 because he told me another story about hacks. So he's 0:10:00.600 --> 0:10:05.520 delaying me, which totally screwed the whole thing up. But 0:10:05.600 --> 0:10:08.280 I made it in the building. I waved at the guard. 0:10:08.320 --> 0:10:10.280 I kept moving because I knew I had the runs. 0:10:10.360 --> 0:10:13.680 Gotta hurry up, got a house. I go to the 0:10:13.840 --> 0:10:16.480 secure elevator elevator there in the building. I used my 0:10:16.520 --> 0:10:18.160 card key to get up to the floor I need 0:10:18.160 --> 0:10:20.840 to get to. I walk out of the elevator. I 0:10:20.880 --> 0:10:24.120 am then making a right hand turn. I've made that turn. 0:10:24.200 --> 0:10:27.920 I make another right hand turn. Now right here, this 0:10:28.000 --> 0:10:30.640 is the moment where I see pay dirt. Right there's 0:10:30.679 --> 0:10:34.240 this long hallway. It's really long, and think about a 0:10:34.240 --> 0:10:38.240 big corporate office is long hallway and on the left 0:10:38.280 --> 0:10:41.760 hand side is the men's room. I've got nothing at 0:10:41.840 --> 0:10:44.600 this point but open field. I'm the running back at 0:10:44.600 --> 0:10:47.600 about the twenty yard line, and uh, no one's in 0:10:47.640 --> 0:10:50.560 front of me. No one, There's only people behind me. 0:10:50.600 --> 0:10:52.680 There's no one in front of me. I'm gonna make 0:10:52.720 --> 0:10:59.840 it right wrong guest gone popery poop. I got the ships. 0:11:00.520 --> 0:11:04.360 As I turned that corner, I pooped my pants. And 0:11:04.679 --> 0:11:10.040 this was a total fucking nightmare. Uh So, at this point, 0:11:10.080 --> 0:11:14.880 I've got about twenty two minutes, two minutes or something 0:11:14.880 --> 0:11:18.400 like that till we go on the air. Now, this 0:11:18.440 --> 0:11:20.640 is a job that you can't be wait for. You know, 0:11:20.679 --> 0:11:22.320 if you have certain jobs you can call up and say, hey, 0:11:22.320 --> 0:11:24.000 I'll be a few minutes later or whatever. They don't 0:11:24.040 --> 0:11:27.360 really care. You gotta be on time. The show starts. 0:11:27.360 --> 0:11:29.920 When the show starts, So I scramble. I'm in scramble mode. 0:11:30.200 --> 0:11:32.559 I put my game face on right now. I tried 0:11:32.600 --> 0:11:35.000 to contain what I call the Exxon Valdis as an 0:11:35.000 --> 0:11:39.000 outdated reference, but I try to contain the spill and 0:11:39.080 --> 0:11:43.080 I did. It was it was an underwear situation that 0:11:43.200 --> 0:11:46.400 took the brunt of the damage. All right, So what 0:11:46.520 --> 0:11:48.520 I did then? You know, I'm I'm like, oh man, 0:11:48.600 --> 0:11:50.360 I got it. What am I gonna do here? So 0:11:50.400 --> 0:11:53.280 I took him off. I'm in the bathroom here. I 0:11:53.360 --> 0:11:58.960 took care of business. I then did what's the term 0:11:59.000 --> 0:12:02.360 for cleaning up in the bathroom? You know that I 0:12:02.440 --> 0:12:04.400 forget the term that you take a shower in the 0:12:04.440 --> 0:12:10.000 sink kind of thing, not as a as a slang term. 0:12:10.040 --> 0:12:12.240 But maybe somebody can send it to me. I don't rememberbody. 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:14.079 I'll probably say the wrong thing. It'll be be in 0:12:14.120 --> 0:12:16.160 trouble or whatever. But but anyway, so I washed up 0:12:16.160 --> 0:12:19.400 as much as I could. Uh and uh, and then 0:12:19.440 --> 0:12:27.280 I carried the soiled underwear out. Why why didn't you 0:12:27.320 --> 0:12:30.040 carry it out? Because I mean I could wash. I 0:12:30.040 --> 0:12:31.800 got a bunch of questions, so keep going, all right, 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:35.600 So I walk out. So at this point, I'm I'm 0:12:35.640 --> 0:12:38.760 going I'm I'm rambo, I'm commando because that's what I 0:12:38.800 --> 0:12:41.360 am doing, commando style. So I cleaned up again. I 0:12:41.360 --> 0:12:43.920 cleaned up everything pretty much I could, I thought, because 0:12:44.000 --> 0:12:46.720 you know, corporate people, I could just imagine the president 0:12:46.720 --> 0:12:49.040 of the Premier Networks coming in and seeing ship all 0:12:49.080 --> 0:12:51.240 over the bathroom. And then you know, you know, goodbye. 0:12:51.320 --> 0:12:55.280 I'm done. So I cleaned up everything and I did 0:12:55.320 --> 0:12:58.959 all this in twenty two minutes, twenty one minutes or so, 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:02.760 and then I walked out. I went to the car. 0:13:02.920 --> 0:13:05.400 I had a little thing of cologne, and I figured 0:13:05.440 --> 0:13:07.760 I probably smelled like ship because I shipped my pants. 0:13:07.960 --> 0:13:11.400 So I spread cologne all over the place, and uh, 0:13:11.640 --> 0:13:14.800 and then I walked into the building. Now here's the question. 0:13:14.800 --> 0:13:16.880 I did the show. I didn't say anything. Now here's 0:13:16.920 --> 0:13:21.000 the question who. It's multiple choice. Who on the staff 0:13:21.559 --> 0:13:25.520 figured out that I had a problem. Was it a Roberto, 0:13:26.040 --> 0:13:30.400 b Eddie, C Cooper, Loop or D none of the above? 0:13:30.600 --> 0:13:34.280 All right, So the process of elimination, I'd had to say. 0:13:34.440 --> 0:13:37.360 You can eliminate Eddie for two reasons. One is he's 0:13:37.400 --> 0:13:39.920 in a studio that you guys can't see each other, 0:13:39.960 --> 0:13:45.160 and two, he doesn't engage with you at all. That's right, Um, 0:13:45.520 --> 0:13:54.760 Coop is oftentimes a loof during your show. Man Roberto 0:13:54.840 --> 0:13:58.720 is there, but I don't know if come on, guest guy, 0:13:58.800 --> 0:14:01.120 I'm gonna say D. None of the you think that 0:14:01.400 --> 0:14:04.520 nobody on my staff, these hard working people that are 0:14:04.559 --> 0:14:07.720 extremely important to the show, that nobody noticed that the 0:14:07.760 --> 0:14:10.120 host of the show shipped his pants twenty minutes before 0:14:10.120 --> 0:14:14.400 the show. Yeah, I'm gonna say no, Well no, he 0:14:14.440 --> 0:14:18.720 had nobody all right, the correct answer reveal answers. Reveal answers. 0:14:20.520 --> 0:14:23.720 You are correct. Not a single person noticed that. I 0:14:23.840 --> 0:14:28.280 had a very unfortunate situation that hadn't happened to me 0:14:28.320 --> 0:14:31.320 since I was a child, take place a few minutes 0:14:31.360 --> 0:14:33.400 before the show. I was getting a little worried because 0:14:34.320 --> 0:14:37.160 the crew has a reputation. I didn't want to soil it. 0:14:37.600 --> 0:14:39.840 You know what you're providing me about I I must 0:14:39.880 --> 0:14:42.520 have smelled. There used to be a young lady that 0:14:42.560 --> 0:14:44.560 worked at our building. She didn't work at Fox, but 0:14:44.720 --> 0:14:46.640 she worked across the hall. I don't know if I've 0:14:46.680 --> 0:14:51.160 told this story before. Um, but somebody, one of the 0:14:51.200 --> 0:14:53.080 I think was Jerry, my producer at the time, I said, 0:14:53.120 --> 0:14:57.040 you know, I think she's, um, she's like a stripper. 0:14:57.880 --> 0:15:00.320 And I said, what are you talking about. She's she's 0:15:00.320 --> 0:15:02.480 a good looking girl. Whatever. I don't, I mean, why 0:15:02.520 --> 0:15:04.480 would you call her a stripper? That's I mean, that's 0:15:04.520 --> 0:15:06.960 she's just a regular girl with her No, I said, 0:15:07.000 --> 0:15:10.480 he said, Smeller, she's got the perfume of a stripper 0:15:11.280 --> 0:15:13.680 and uh and sure enough, like when she was in 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:19.680 the building, she left a certain smell in. I mean 0:15:19.720 --> 0:15:21.200 it was it was a nice smell, but it was 0:15:21.280 --> 0:15:27.240 over the top perfume. And sure enough, when she was there, Jerry, 0:15:27.600 --> 0:15:30.520 I guess she had done some adult stuff. Actually not either, 0:15:30.560 --> 0:15:33.360 that's like the next level. Jerry found some of the 0:15:33.400 --> 0:15:37.320 photos on the internet. What's her name? And it's pretty wild. 0:15:37.320 --> 0:15:40.000 What's that? What's her name? I don't even remember her name. 0:15:40.040 --> 0:15:41.280 I mean, I don't know what she's doing now. She 0:15:41.320 --> 0:15:42.920 maybe she's doing that full time. I don't know. But 0:15:42.960 --> 0:15:45.280 it was really funny because I'm guessing I smelled like 0:15:45.320 --> 0:15:48.520 that where you because I put so much cologne or 0:15:48.560 --> 0:15:50.280 whatever I had on. Yeah, I was like I was 0:15:50.320 --> 0:15:53.360 trying to counter the smell that I thought I had. 0:15:53.920 --> 0:15:56.040 But then I'm like, well, I'm sitting in a room 0:15:56.080 --> 0:15:58.560 by myself. These guys don't really talk to me, so 0:15:58.600 --> 0:16:00.640 I'm I think I'm pretty good. It's like, it's not 0:16:00.680 --> 0:16:02.920 like I have to go out and speak in a 0:16:03.720 --> 0:16:06.120 public square in front of even I am in the 0:16:06.160 --> 0:16:08.680 public square, but I'm like hidden in the public square. Yeah. No, 0:16:08.840 --> 0:16:13.640 so you're referencing a biday. Correct, I wouldn't know. But 0:16:13.760 --> 0:16:15.600 day what that's that's what the thing with the water 0:16:15.680 --> 0:16:18.120 that cleans up everything? Yeah? Right, no, no, no, I'm 0:16:18.120 --> 0:16:21.720 telling you there's a term when you're in the bathroom 0:16:21.920 --> 0:16:25.200 and you shower, but you only use the sink to shower. 0:16:26.000 --> 0:16:27.840 I don't know. Alright, So can I ask my questions? 0:16:27.880 --> 0:16:30.040 Are you done with the story? Are you gonna interrogate me? 0:16:30.040 --> 0:16:32.040 Are you gonna get a little bit the third degree? 0:16:32.400 --> 0:16:35.080 A little bit? Yeah? But these aren't gonna be scripted. Um. 0:16:35.920 --> 0:16:38.600 First off? First off, what were you? What were you wearing? 0:16:38.640 --> 0:16:40.600 What was your tire for the night? All right? So 0:16:40.680 --> 0:16:43.880 I had a guy a long sleeve sweatshirt kind of 0:16:43.920 --> 0:16:45.800 like the thing the baseball players were under their jersey. 0:16:45.800 --> 0:16:48.640 And then I had sweatpants on, I had shoes on. Okay, 0:16:49.080 --> 0:16:52.600 what color were the sweatpants? Fortunately, they were black. Okay, 0:16:52.600 --> 0:16:55.160 that's good. And in your shoes what color were those? 0:16:56.480 --> 0:16:58.920 They were also black? Black? Good tennis shoes on it. 0:16:59.000 --> 0:17:01.760 That's good because sometimes as you wear sandals and we 0:17:02.880 --> 0:17:05.200 not usually I usually wear shoes, though I usually wish 0:17:05.440 --> 0:17:09.119 I know, Um, was there any kind of markings on 0:17:09.160 --> 0:17:13.840 the floor on the runway towards the bathroom. No. But 0:17:14.640 --> 0:17:18.320 in the bathroom when I pulled everything off, there was 0:17:18.880 --> 0:17:22.520 some stainage. All right, What did you do with the 0:17:22.600 --> 0:17:27.000 underwear once you were done with it? Alright? So I 0:17:27.440 --> 0:17:31.800 tried to wash off the stank as much as I could, um, 0:17:31.840 --> 0:17:34.199 but that was kind of disgusting. And then I just 0:17:34.400 --> 0:17:38.359 I kind of made it into a ball. The part 0:17:38.400 --> 0:17:42.679 that wasn't soiled. I wrapped around the part that was 0:17:43.160 --> 0:17:45.679 so I could hold it, um and I and I 0:17:45.800 --> 0:17:49.520 then uh made the walk of shame and carried it down. 0:17:50.000 --> 0:17:51.520 Where'd you carry it too? Though? Did you put it 0:17:51.520 --> 0:17:53.159 into the studio? Did you put it in your car? No? No, 0:17:53.200 --> 0:17:55.240 I put in the back of my car. Put in 0:17:55.280 --> 0:17:57.520 the back of my car, which is uh. And I 0:17:57.560 --> 0:17:59.520 was like, well, it's gonna smell, but it was cold. 0:17:59.560 --> 0:18:02.960 It was kind of cool that night. So you didn't 0:18:03.000 --> 0:18:05.879 put in the trunk? No I Did I put in 0:18:05.920 --> 0:18:09.440 the trunk, Yeah, the back of the trunk. How how 0:18:09.520 --> 0:18:13.800 was your opening monologue after that? You know, nobody even't 0:18:13.800 --> 0:18:16.040 seemed to notice any different. I was just screaming like 0:18:16.080 --> 0:18:18.600 a lunatic about the astros and so that's pretty much 0:18:18.600 --> 0:18:20.520 what I on the only thing I've been doing that's 0:18:20.560 --> 0:18:23.360 become the centerpiece of the show. And so I don't 0:18:23.359 --> 0:18:27.840 think anybody really noticed any difference. I pulled it off. 0:18:28.480 --> 0:18:30.760 I'm like the Astros. They pulled off the perfect crime. 0:18:30.800 --> 0:18:34.080 I pulled off the perfect ship your pants before twenty 0:18:34.080 --> 0:18:37.440 minutes before network radio show? Did you know full disclosure? 0:18:37.440 --> 0:18:39.159 Did you know that there was a floor below the 0:18:39.200 --> 0:18:41.280 one that you went on that is also operated by 0:18:41.320 --> 0:18:44.720 Premiere that you can access? No, I think I was 0:18:44.800 --> 0:18:47.359 on the right. Well you're so you're saying, like the 0:18:47.480 --> 0:18:50.160 third is that? Is that all you're saying? Yes, I 0:18:50.200 --> 0:18:53.080 didn't know. I never go there. I I'm usually, uh, 0:18:53.160 --> 0:18:56.080 the fourth floor guy. I'm usually a fourth floor guy 0:18:56.280 --> 0:18:58.400 because I wasn't going to go to the fifth because 0:18:58.440 --> 0:19:01.119 I know there's people they're doing show those. Yeah, so 0:19:01.160 --> 0:19:04.040 I don't I wouldn't do the fifth. I thought the 0:19:04.200 --> 0:19:09.120 fourth was good. I've done that before. That's corporate offices mostly, 0:19:09.520 --> 0:19:13.359 and they're all gone at five o'clock, so I knew 0:19:13.359 --> 0:19:15.840 they had been gone for many hours. And I know 0:19:15.960 --> 0:19:19.480 they cleaned those bathrooms. They scrubbed those scrub a dub dub. 0:19:19.760 --> 0:19:22.760 They scrubbed those so good. Because they do not they do. 0:19:22.880 --> 0:19:25.080 I want those corporate people upset it. All right, So 0:19:25.119 --> 0:19:27.639 here's the other here's the last question, type right, the 0:19:27.720 --> 0:19:30.800 final question. When you got to the fourth floor, did 0:19:30.880 --> 0:19:35.159 you go through the glass doors? No? No, I knew 0:19:35.200 --> 0:19:37.439 where the bathroom if I had planned this out. You know, 0:19:38.119 --> 0:19:41.200 I learned when I was younger, reading Sun Zoo's book 0:19:41.240 --> 0:19:43.440 The Art of War, that you've got to have a plan. 0:19:43.880 --> 0:19:46.199 And so I realized, guest gone, I knew where the 0:19:46.200 --> 0:19:48.400 bathroom was. I mapped the whole thing out of my head. 0:19:48.400 --> 0:19:50.679 I had a whole plan. Ralph left me up a 0:19:50.680 --> 0:19:53.199 little bit wreck at Ralph by talking to me, but 0:19:53.240 --> 0:19:55.320 I don't think that would have mattered anyway. I believe 0:19:55.440 --> 0:19:58.600 that I was just because of the gall bladder. This 0:19:58.640 --> 0:20:00.600 was gonna This was inevitable. It was a bad job. 0:20:00.640 --> 0:20:03.600 I mean, I should have just used the public bathroom downstairs, 0:20:04.000 --> 0:20:07.919 but I tried to go with hygiene and I got burned. 0:20:08.640 --> 0:20:11.600 No good deed goes unpunished, as they say. And this 0:20:11.680 --> 0:20:14.399 is amazing because just a week prior to this, we 0:20:14.440 --> 0:20:17.040 actually talked about someone I think asked us a question 0:20:17.040 --> 0:20:19.920 about that. When we talked about, um, have you ever 0:20:20.320 --> 0:20:24.240 literally shoot your pants. Yeah and yeah thanks to yet again, 0:20:24.320 --> 0:20:28.080 guess gun yet again remember uh you you famously said, hey, 0:20:28.160 --> 0:20:31.480 have you ever heard of the emergency surgery? And uh 0:20:31.520 --> 0:20:34.040 and then like a week later, I'm in the operating 0:20:34.119 --> 0:20:36.399 room that you're a schmuck. You are you know what 0:20:36.440 --> 0:20:38.360 you are? You're a plague. Gives what you are? This 0:20:38.400 --> 0:20:42.800 is unbelievable. All right, heyway that's my that's my gall 0:20:42.840 --> 0:20:46.480 bladder punching back story. So I guess does that make 0:20:46.520 --> 0:20:49.439 me more relatable or are people gonna hate me more now? 0:20:49.680 --> 0:20:52.040 Or I'm not sure how it works. I don't think 0:20:52.080 --> 0:20:54.080 it's relatable because you don't get too many people that 0:20:54.200 --> 0:21:00.000 have had their gallbladders removed, and outside of the guys 0:21:00.040 --> 0:21:02.680 just have accidents. Though my wife was I told my wife, 0:21:02.680 --> 0:21:05.439 she's like, well, she she said, she hears it like 0:21:05.520 --> 0:21:07.920 places like Home Depot and Lows. A lot of those 0:21:07.960 --> 0:21:10.520 construction guys are going there to take a dump because 0:21:10.560 --> 0:21:13.480 they don't have bathrooms they can use, and they'll shift 0:21:13.520 --> 0:21:16.240 their pants. Sometimes they'll just leave the underwear in the 0:21:16.400 --> 0:21:19.960 in the bathroom at Home Depot and Lows. That's soiled underwear. 0:21:20.040 --> 0:21:24.879 Oh man, that's that's tragic. Yeah, and I moved past it. 0:21:24.920 --> 0:21:27.720 I'm I'm alright, and I've learned my lessons. So from 0:21:27.720 --> 0:21:30.840 now on, I know I have between thirty and ninety 0:21:30.880 --> 0:21:33.639 minutes when I fast. I go to day fast. I 0:21:33.680 --> 0:21:35.000 usually once a day, but if I do it two 0:21:35.040 --> 0:21:36.560 day fast, I know I have to have thirty to 0:21:36.720 --> 0:21:39.560 ninety and if I don't go to the bathroom, this 0:21:39.640 --> 0:21:42.280 is going to happen again. So I need to plan 0:21:42.400 --> 0:21:45.680 out better. And I really have to cut off when 0:21:45.720 --> 0:21:49.320 I eat by a certain time otherwise this is this 0:21:49.480 --> 0:21:51.960 oil is going to become flowing out. Now do you 0:21:52.000 --> 0:21:54.840 think if you would have had anything that was solid 0:21:54.840 --> 0:21:56.560 this would have saved you, Like if you had anything 0:21:56.760 --> 0:21:58.280 I don't want to say high in fiber because I 0:21:58.280 --> 0:22:00.679 would have made you go anyway, but anything with I mean, 0:22:00.720 --> 0:22:03.560 I don't know bread or rice, No I no I had. 0:22:03.720 --> 0:22:06.639 I had a little rice, but no, it's just and 0:22:06.680 --> 0:22:08.840 I'm not a doctor. I can play one on the 0:22:08.920 --> 0:22:10.760 on the radio. I play a lawyer on the radio. 0:22:10.840 --> 0:22:15.840 But there's something related to the gall bladder and fasting 0:22:17.000 --> 0:22:19.920 where it's it's unavoidable. It doesn't matter what I eat, 0:22:19.960 --> 0:22:21.720 like I've eaten fried. I used to think it was 0:22:21.800 --> 0:22:25.399 just because of fried food. Yeah, but this this was 0:22:25.440 --> 0:22:28.800 not This was grilled chicken and some some rice cooked 0:22:28.840 --> 0:22:31.240 in rice dood was cooked in the pond. Man, you 0:22:31.280 --> 0:22:33.560 are saved by the fact that you work at an 0:22:33.560 --> 0:22:37.040 overnight shift and there was nobody in the building. Oh yeah, 0:22:37.119 --> 0:22:38.720 but clearly, I mean if I had, I mean it 0:22:38.720 --> 0:22:41.280 would have been a nightmare if I during the day 0:22:41.359 --> 0:22:44.600 with all those people wandering around wearing nice clothes and 0:22:44.640 --> 0:22:46.879 all that, and if if I had an important meeting 0:22:46.920 --> 0:22:48.560 to go. Imagine if I had to go to some meeting. 0:22:48.680 --> 0:22:52.440 Oh yeah, just imagine if you actually took the time 0:22:52.480 --> 0:22:55.200 to show up early to work and prep and get 0:22:55.200 --> 0:22:57.400 here at a responsible time, none of the stuff would 0:22:57.400 --> 0:23:00.439 have happened. Well, I was there a responsible is I have? 0:23:00.560 --> 0:23:01.960 You know the I have the home set up. I 0:23:02.000 --> 0:23:05.119 know you're not at that level game. I'm not prep 0:23:05.240 --> 0:23:10.040 and not relatable. I have internet access, and I know 0:23:10.080 --> 0:23:11.760 you're kind of generic and all that. You do a 0:23:11.760 --> 0:23:15.440 little cookie cutter prep, But I I have I spent 0:23:15.520 --> 0:23:18.040 a lot of time. I'm type A when it comes 0:23:18.040 --> 0:23:19.960 to show prep. I kind of feel bad for you, 0:23:20.119 --> 0:23:23.639 and in some ways you don't I do they do 0:23:23.840 --> 0:23:26.240 this is? I think you're enjoying my misery. You're doing 0:23:26.280 --> 0:23:29.400 some schadenfreud. No, I don't do it like that. I mean, 0:23:29.440 --> 0:23:33.520 that's time and place for everything, but it is. It 0:23:33.640 --> 0:23:35.960 is reliable for a lot of people that that listen 0:23:36.040 --> 0:23:38.359 to your show, especially because we get a lot of 0:23:38.359 --> 0:23:41.680 people around the country that drive a ton and there's 0:23:41.720 --> 0:23:43.880 not a lot of drop offs. There's not a lot 0:23:43.920 --> 0:23:47.000 of get off the runway or the off ramp and 0:23:47.000 --> 0:23:50.080 and and go, and that's just nature of the beast. 0:23:50.160 --> 0:23:54.679 But a pro tip, find your nearest, nicest hotel and 0:23:54.720 --> 0:23:56.560 you're safe. As soon as you walk into the hotel, 0:23:56.720 --> 0:23:58.399 make sure you're on your cell phone or pretend like 0:23:58.440 --> 0:24:01.280 you're talking on your cell phone, and head straight to 0:24:01.359 --> 0:24:04.520 delivery and then you're good. Yeah, that's good. You know 0:24:04.520 --> 0:24:06.720 what I did One time I had a situation where 0:24:06.760 --> 0:24:10.080 I was I met a friend, my gambling buddy Hunter. 0:24:10.400 --> 0:24:13.800 I met him for lunch and I knew that this 0:24:13.880 --> 0:24:15.800 was gonna happen. So what I did was I walked 0:24:15.800 --> 0:24:19.960 around Tar, I walked around Target, and I used the 0:24:20.000 --> 0:24:24.280 facility at Target. At Target, yeah, I wanted a Costco, 0:24:24.320 --> 0:24:26.960 but I Costco was too far away. I like Costco 0:24:27.000 --> 0:24:29.160 because they have three rolls of toilet paper and each 0:24:29.520 --> 0:24:32.919 each to all there at cost. Speaking of costco have 0:24:33.000 --> 0:24:35.920 we just done twenty five minutes almost on me shipping 0:24:35.920 --> 0:24:40.600 my pain? We've done We've done defication podcast. So we went. 0:24:40.720 --> 0:24:43.080 We went for the month of January, we went all 0:24:43.200 --> 0:24:48.399 death talk and now in February we've done all defecation sore. 0:24:49.320 --> 0:24:51.520 And when can we get like the people at porta 0:24:51.560 --> 0:24:54.560 Potty to smile this or the squatty potty people to 0:24:54.600 --> 0:24:56.960 sponsor this. You know what your birthday is coming up, 0:24:57.000 --> 0:24:59.960 Maybe we should get you some diapers. Well I'm heading 0:25:00.000 --> 0:25:02.000 that direction here. You know what they call that in 0:25:02.040 --> 0:25:05.120 the Civil War? This is this is a random thing. 0:25:05.160 --> 0:25:07.800 This my head so so fucked up. So I remember 0:25:07.840 --> 0:25:10.359 watching the documentary about the Civil War. You know what 0:25:10.400 --> 0:25:13.400 they call what I happened to me in the Civil War? 0:25:13.760 --> 0:25:17.960 They called it the Tennessee Trots, is what they called it. 0:25:17.960 --> 0:25:21.280 It's another way of saying dysenterry, but it's the I 0:25:21.280 --> 0:25:23.399 had the Tennessee Trots. That is what I had. I was. 0:25:23.480 --> 0:25:25.960 I jumped on the poop train. This is great. This 0:25:26.040 --> 0:25:27.760 is probably a little bit of karma since you were 0:25:27.880 --> 0:25:31.680 taunting and flaunting your your Taco Night and Taco Day 0:25:31.720 --> 0:25:35.000 with Bob Fesco over in Kansas City, the Great Bob Fesco, 0:25:35.520 --> 0:25:38.679 respected member of the radio fraternity, the Brotherhood of Sports 0:25:38.720 --> 0:25:41.840 gas Bags right number one morning show in Kansas City. 0:25:41.840 --> 0:25:45.720 And we're hanging out, we're schmoozing at El Coyote on 0:25:45.840 --> 0:25:49.199 Beverly in l A. And drove him over to the 0:25:49.240 --> 0:25:51.639 Getty After that, the Getty Center dropped him off, gave 0:25:51.680 --> 0:25:54.320 him a ride over there. It was a wonderful a 0:25:54.359 --> 0:25:58.440 wonderful time to talk to a professional, respected broadcast and 0:25:58.600 --> 0:26:00.239 it was just absolutely got a little ship on your 0:26:00.280 --> 0:26:03.280 nose now and not on your ass anymore. Fox Sports 0:26:03.359 --> 0:26:05.960 Radio has the best sports talk lineup in the nation. 0:26:06.320 --> 0:26:09.240 Catch all of our shows at Fox Sports Radio dot 0:26:09.240 --> 0:26:12.440 com and within the I Heart Radio app search f 0:26:12.600 --> 0:26:15.120 s R to listen live. All right, So the Costco 0:26:15.240 --> 0:26:20.960 dust dump dummy, the Costco dust up dummy. So last weekend, uh, 0:26:21.000 --> 0:26:23.720 but my life is turning into a sitcom. So last 0:26:23.760 --> 0:26:27.639 weekend I made my traditional sample run at Costco, but 0:26:28.560 --> 0:26:31.959 I decided to change it up gas gun and I 0:26:32.040 --> 0:26:35.399 went to a different foreign location than I normally do. 0:26:36.359 --> 0:26:39.080 And this was in several cities over from where I. 0:26:39.160 --> 0:26:42.560 Usually there's two costcos I rotate in my area, so 0:26:42.720 --> 0:26:45.760 I'm like in between two costcos. This was a totally different. 0:26:45.760 --> 0:26:48.560 It's like, this is about the thirty minutes away. I 0:26:48.640 --> 0:26:50.479 just happened to go there. I I do some business 0:26:50.480 --> 0:26:53.560 in that area, so I thirty minutes away. I figured 0:26:53.600 --> 0:26:57.080 I would give the local sample workers that tanned out 0:26:57.080 --> 0:26:59.479 the food the week off, and so I ended up 0:26:59.480 --> 0:27:04.639 getting into a verbal rhubarb with someone at Costco. All right, 0:27:04.720 --> 0:27:06.399 this is again, this is not my Costco. This is 0:27:06.440 --> 0:27:08.200 just some other Costco and I end up getting into 0:27:08.280 --> 0:27:10.840 a bit of a dust up. Now you want to 0:27:10.840 --> 0:27:13.399 take a guess here was this is multiple choice? Was 0:27:13.440 --> 0:27:19.560 it a a customer at Costco, be a Costco employee 0:27:19.720 --> 0:27:22.600 that wanted to see my Costco card and stop me 0:27:22.640 --> 0:27:28.479 at the door, or see none of the above. Well, 0:27:28.480 --> 0:27:31.560 it's gotta be somebody, so I'll go with B. All right, 0:27:31.960 --> 0:27:35.879 that is correct. I got into a disagreement with the 0:27:36.119 --> 0:27:39.520 people handing out the samples, one person in particular, guy 0:27:39.640 --> 0:27:45.120 or girl woman. All right. So they had this little 0:27:45.160 --> 0:27:48.119 popcorn thing with like sugar on top or whatever. They 0:27:48.160 --> 0:27:50.240 little pop big bags of popcorn. They were trying to 0:27:50.240 --> 0:27:53.560 to sell. But they had samples, and I figured it 0:27:53.760 --> 0:27:56.360 was whatever. But it was free and I learned when 0:27:56.359 --> 0:27:58.680 I was a kid, if it's freeze for me. Um. 0:27:58.720 --> 0:28:00.800 So I had my rotation, go I had that. They 0:28:00.840 --> 0:28:04.639 had a chicken dumpling thing going, they had chicken nuggets. 0:28:04.720 --> 0:28:07.720 They had several stands that were okay. I mean i'd 0:28:07.760 --> 0:28:10.159 give I'd grade the samples like, uh, I can give 0:28:10.240 --> 0:28:13.600 him a CE. So anyway, I'm doing my rotation and 0:28:13.640 --> 0:28:16.479 this old woman, this grandmas, you know, she's handing out 0:28:16.520 --> 0:28:18.720 the samples. It's fine, no problem with older women or whatever. 0:28:18.840 --> 0:28:21.760 That's fine. So she starts giving me this sales wrap 0:28:22.480 --> 0:28:26.000 role I'm grabbing the sample. I ignored her. So the 0:28:26.040 --> 0:28:28.200 next time I come around, she's a little more aggressive. 0:28:28.240 --> 0:28:31.320 She says, do you really like that popcorn a lot? 0:28:31.400 --> 0:28:35.480 Don't you? Right now, I'm not interested in play by 0:28:35.560 --> 0:28:39.280 play when i'm I'm a whore at you know, samples. 0:28:39.320 --> 0:28:40.480 You know what I'm saying. I don't want to hear 0:28:40.520 --> 0:28:42.320 the play by play when i'm eating. I want to 0:28:42.440 --> 0:28:45.440 enjoy it. I don't need your commentary. I'm gonna hit 0:28:45.480 --> 0:28:48.040 the mute button. But I didn't say anything right, just 0:28:48.120 --> 0:28:50.640 kind of whatever. So the next time I come around, 0:28:50.960 --> 0:28:54.120 she again this, This older woman says, you like that 0:28:54.200 --> 0:28:57.040 popcorn a lot? Then this is what set me off. 0:28:57.080 --> 0:28:59.760 This was what said off the neutron bomb. She then 0:29:00.000 --> 0:29:03.320 it's an addendum, this woman says, why don't you buy 0:29:03.320 --> 0:29:06.800 a bag? Now? What do you think? My rebuttal was 0:29:07.440 --> 0:29:11.640 nobody fucking asked no. My response was, why don't you 0:29:11.680 --> 0:29:15.760 buy me a bag? All right? Now? This woman's then 0:29:15.880 --> 0:29:18.640 she's flummacks. This woman's flummicks. Why she's taking it back. 0:29:18.720 --> 0:29:20.360 She's like, I can't believe this guy said this to me. 0:29:20.520 --> 0:29:22.520 What was the level of audio that you said this set? 0:29:22.800 --> 0:29:25.720 It was pretty loud because I was irritated. I was bothered, 0:29:25.840 --> 0:29:27.760 and I kept my mouth shut the first couple of 0:29:27.760 --> 0:29:30.040 times she annoyed me, But at this point it was 0:29:30.080 --> 0:29:32.920 such a headache. I was like, well, screw it, I'm 0:29:32.920 --> 0:29:36.280 going it's not my normal costco. So anyway, so I say, 0:29:36.440 --> 0:29:38.840 I say that line, why don't you buy me a bag? 0:29:39.360 --> 0:29:41.920 She then is like she's knocked back a little bit. 0:29:42.440 --> 0:29:45.360 She then says she doesn't have any money. So my 0:29:45.520 --> 0:29:48.720 response is, well, guess what, I don't have any money either, 0:29:50.760 --> 0:29:52.320 which is true. I didn't have any cash in my 0:29:52.400 --> 0:29:55.680 wall at the time, so anyway, so I kept but 0:29:55.760 --> 0:30:00.440 I I'm a soldier. I wandered around and the next 0:30:00.480 --> 0:30:02.480 three times I made the rounds to get the popcorn. 0:30:02.600 --> 0:30:05.600 That woman kept her mouth shut. She did not say 0:30:05.640 --> 0:30:07.400 anything to me. You know what that is, guest, gone, 0:30:07.680 --> 0:30:10.440 that's winning at the Costco sample game? Us what that is? 0:30:10.480 --> 0:30:12.520 Because I've heard, I've talked to somebody. I'm friends with. 0:30:12.560 --> 0:30:14.360 Some of these people to hand out the Costco samples. 0:30:14.400 --> 0:30:16.480 Their job is just to hand out the samples. Yeah, 0:30:16.480 --> 0:30:18.480 they got to give a sales wrap. But you you know, 0:30:18.640 --> 0:30:21.840 you do not stop people from getting samples. You know, 0:30:22.240 --> 0:30:24.320 they get as many as they want. That's just the 0:30:24.360 --> 0:30:27.640 way it is now. That's it. Period stops. So you 0:30:27.760 --> 0:30:32.480 meant you made a Costco employee bend the knee as 0:30:32.520 --> 0:30:35.280 she was providing samples for you, and you decided to 0:30:35.320 --> 0:30:37.320 crush her. I mean, she probably had a smile on 0:30:37.360 --> 0:30:39.120 her face when she said this, and almost sudden he 0:30:39.200 --> 0:30:41.960 snapped back at her. No, she seemed a little annoyed 0:30:42.000 --> 0:30:44.240 that I was taking so many samples. She's seen bothered. 0:30:44.280 --> 0:30:46.360 But and it's not really a Costco employee. They sub 0:30:46.440 --> 0:30:49.959 let that out third party. I would never do that 0:30:50.000 --> 0:30:53.240 to a Costco plus. So was she god, was she 0:30:53.360 --> 0:30:55.880 an older or younger woman? No, I said she was 0:30:55.920 --> 0:30:58.600 a little older. I don't know. I'm bad at judging ages. 0:30:58.640 --> 0:31:00.320 I don't know. Most of those people are are either 0:31:00.400 --> 0:31:03.400 really young it's their first job, or they're really old, 0:31:04.200 --> 0:31:06.160 and there's not a lot of people in between that 0:31:06.280 --> 0:31:09.240 do that job. That was was your wife with you? No, 0:31:09.720 --> 0:31:12.360 Unfortunately she was not with me. She's very happy about 0:31:12.400 --> 0:31:14.440 that that she wasn't with She would have snapped, she 0:31:14.440 --> 0:31:16.880 would have bit her fucking head off. Yeah. Yeah, she 0:31:17.000 --> 0:31:20.040 does not appreciate that kind of civil discourse. Oh yeah, 0:31:20.240 --> 0:31:24.040 you're you're your better half has some sauce, you're better 0:31:24.080 --> 0:31:26.600 a half has a ninety nine fast but that will 0:31:26.640 --> 0:31:30.040 cut inside on people. Yeah, she's You've got a potty 0:31:30.080 --> 0:31:33.120 mouth and all that stuff. So I love it. Unfortunately, 0:31:33.480 --> 0:31:36.440 it was just between me and the person. You've had 0:31:36.640 --> 0:31:38.520 ever seen that person again? Yeah, but you've had some 0:31:38.640 --> 0:31:41.960 mug again. You've had some brutal dust ups now at Costco. 0:31:42.000 --> 0:31:44.560 You've had your car hit, You've you've lost your fucking 0:31:44.600 --> 0:31:47.200 cell phone there, and now you've gotten into a roue 0:31:47.240 --> 0:31:50.760 bar with with an employee that was passing up free samples. 0:31:51.280 --> 0:31:54.800 And you wonder why it's one place I go every week. 0:31:54.920 --> 0:31:58.000 It's like to me, it's like my it's my tabernacle, 0:31:58.080 --> 0:32:00.920 it's my church, it's my sanctuary. What it is my temple? 0:32:01.120 --> 0:32:03.120 You have no kitchen, though, How the funk are you 0:32:03.160 --> 0:32:07.000 doing all this at Costco? Well, I'm just wandering around. 0:32:07.000 --> 0:32:09.479 I don't buy anything when I'm doing the same like 0:32:09.840 --> 0:32:12.960 lately the last month, two months now, I haven't bought anything. 0:32:13.000 --> 0:32:15.080 I just get samples. So let me get this straight. 0:32:15.160 --> 0:32:17.760 For as frugal as you are, you actually take the 0:32:17.760 --> 0:32:21.080 time to drive to a Costco further away to get 0:32:21.120 --> 0:32:24.320 free samples of bullshit? Well, I was actually doing something 0:32:24.320 --> 0:32:25.880 in the area, so I just happened to be in 0:32:25.880 --> 0:32:28.400 the area. But it worked out that way, and uh yeah, 0:32:28.480 --> 0:32:32.680 I happened to pop into Costco. And this is more 0:32:32.720 --> 0:32:36.560 embarrassed in the new shipping your pants, Oh do you 0:32:36.680 --> 0:32:39.880 keep your mouth shut over there? This is I'm embarrassed 0:32:39.920 --> 0:32:41.960 for you now. I'm not even happy that. But I 0:32:42.040 --> 0:32:44.280 hang out with the flotsam and jetsam is what I do. 0:32:45.320 --> 0:32:49.280 I hang out with um. So I invite you my 0:32:49.320 --> 0:32:51.680 pants at Costco. And I would have been a lot 0:32:51.720 --> 0:32:56.080 better if you actually do that in front of her. 0:32:57.080 --> 0:32:59.680 You have had a toxics bill, I apologize. How about 0:32:59.680 --> 0:33:01.480 I buy a bag and then shoot all over your feet? 0:33:01.480 --> 0:33:03.800 How about that? Thanks? Is that part of the deal? 0:33:04.440 --> 0:33:08.840 Is that part of the package. So I invite you 0:33:08.960 --> 0:33:12.760 out for a wonderful night of baseball between cal State 0:33:12.840 --> 0:33:16.080 Fullerton Tulane and you reject me to go get free 0:33:16.080 --> 0:33:20.000 samples at Costco. Well, like, this is what your day 0:33:20.040 --> 0:33:23.520 has become. First of all, listen, you wanted me to 0:33:23.640 --> 0:33:27.280 do some kind of work. Was enjoying baseball. I do 0:33:27.400 --> 0:33:30.440 not work for free. Yeah you do, Yeah, you do. 0:33:30.560 --> 0:33:34.440 I do not. I want my work rewarded. I do 0:33:34.520 --> 0:33:39.000 not want my work unrewarded. And uh the the simple 0:33:39.080 --> 0:33:43.240 Active Charity ends at this pro bono podcast, which we 0:33:43.280 --> 0:33:45.479 have still not been paid for. And we've done it 0:33:45.800 --> 0:33:47.800 for how many months? Now? Do we had? Seven months? 0:33:47.800 --> 0:33:49.640 I think this thing's been going on. Yeah. We launched 0:33:49.640 --> 0:33:53.880 it late September early October. Yeah. Yeah, So like if 0:33:53.880 --> 0:33:56.440 they're even if you had paid me twenty bucks, I 0:33:56.480 --> 0:33:59.320 probably would have done it. But uh no, I'm not 0:34:00.080 --> 0:34:03.239 got stuff to do. You know, I got a lot 0:34:03.240 --> 0:34:05.560 of things. I gotta go to Costco, I gotta watch 0:34:05.600 --> 0:34:08.720 out for my gall bladder. You don't live a busy life, 0:34:09.480 --> 0:34:12.719 all right. Well, moving on, the king of douchebags that 0:34:12.719 --> 0:34:17.400 would be David gascon Now, I didn't start with this 0:34:17.440 --> 0:34:19.120 because I didn't want to feed your ego. I know 0:34:19.200 --> 0:34:22.640 you're a narcissist and all that, but you have really 0:34:22.680 --> 0:34:26.239 touched a nerve with the Malley militia and every man, 0:34:26.440 --> 0:34:31.279 woman and child seemingly united together, all right, they are 0:34:31.400 --> 0:34:36.400 united together in their range. You are such a dickhead, 0:34:36.960 --> 0:34:38.279 you are. I don't really, I don't know if you 0:34:38.280 --> 0:34:41.680 realize it. So for those that haven't been playing along, 0:34:42.640 --> 0:34:45.440 it's time to dish out some real talk. Um. And 0:34:45.480 --> 0:34:49.040 so David Gascon fix is kind of funny to to 0:34:49.400 --> 0:34:53.560 funk with his co workers. And h you are such 0:34:53.560 --> 0:34:56.800 a disgrace when it comes to the automobile that literally 0:34:57.000 --> 0:35:00.959 Henry Ford and Carl Benz are rolled over in their 0:35:00.960 --> 0:35:03.960 graves at the way you drive and the way that 0:35:04.040 --> 0:35:07.560 you park. And this led to a feeding frenzy to 0:35:08.600 --> 0:35:10.640 to the Malam militias. So the other day I'm pulling 0:35:10.719 --> 0:35:14.279 to work a guesstconsta in the news desk, and first 0:35:14.280 --> 0:35:15.680 of all, I couldn't get in the building because my 0:35:15.719 --> 0:35:18.160 parking pass wouldn't work for some reason. There was a glitch, 0:35:18.880 --> 0:35:20.880 which was my first problem. But then I get in, 0:35:21.000 --> 0:35:23.480 I drive a little bit, make a right hand turn 0:35:23.640 --> 0:35:28.200 into the I Heart Media Slash Premiere Networks parking lot there, 0:35:28.239 --> 0:35:30.560 which other people use sometimes. So I go in there 0:35:31.600 --> 0:35:35.120 and uh, I immediately see this car in an odd angle. Now, 0:35:35.200 --> 0:35:37.040 originally I thought, well, that must be just a car, 0:35:37.200 --> 0:35:38.879 you know, stop for a second, then the car will 0:35:38.880 --> 0:35:41.560 get out and move on. And then I realized, no, 0:35:41.719 --> 0:35:43.200 the lights are off on the car. The car is 0:35:43.280 --> 0:35:47.200 not moving. The car is parked at a forty five 0:35:47.239 --> 0:35:51.160 degree angle. I guess, uh, crossing over my parking place 0:35:51.200 --> 0:35:55.839 which I park in every night, and the one next 0:35:55.880 --> 0:36:01.720 to it. The two premier parking spaces are both covered 0:36:01.800 --> 0:36:04.680 up by this assholes car. And it is none other 0:36:05.520 --> 0:36:12.160 then David Jay Gascon especially known as I was as 0:36:12.200 --> 0:36:14.040 they would call it an acute angle that I was 0:36:14.120 --> 0:36:17.279 parked debt and uh, I was on the line, so 0:36:17.320 --> 0:36:21.200 it was perfect. But you know this, this building that 0:36:21.239 --> 0:36:25.200 we park in has eight floors, and I think I 0:36:25.239 --> 0:36:27.040 did you guys a little bit of service because you 0:36:27.080 --> 0:36:30.960 guys are always in your regular routine, very lazy, showing 0:36:31.040 --> 0:36:33.200 up just a couple of seconds before the show actually 0:36:33.200 --> 0:36:35.719 goes on the air. And I had to make you 0:36:35.800 --> 0:36:39.360 guys walk in additional ten ft ten fifteen feet. So 0:36:39.440 --> 0:36:41.239 I think I added a little bit something to your 0:36:41.400 --> 0:36:43.680 dynamic of the show, because one, you get the blood 0:36:43.680 --> 0:36:45.799 flowing a little bit, because I know you guys are 0:36:45.800 --> 0:36:48.799 typically just static and too that you guys actually had 0:36:48.840 --> 0:36:51.840 something else to talk about. And uh, I thought you 0:36:51.960 --> 0:36:55.960 got the entire show involved, which is nice because at 0:36:55.960 --> 0:36:59.280 times a rather dormant for at least three or four hours, um, 0:36:59.400 --> 0:37:02.480 and then the list. There is an awful lot of 0:37:02.520 --> 0:37:08.360 people in this world that have some sad lives. Call you. 0:37:08.560 --> 0:37:13.759 Let's let me give you some call you. Hold on 0:37:13.800 --> 0:37:16.440 a sec, Hold on a sec, your mama, Luke, let 0:37:16.440 --> 0:37:20.160 me give you some some Mallard militia reaction here. Uh 0:37:20.200 --> 0:37:24.920 and how we should adjudicate this, Bob wrote in on 0:37:24.960 --> 0:37:28.520 our Facebook page. He said car dealerships use a washable 0:37:28.600 --> 0:37:31.719 ink to write on their car windows. Looks like a 0:37:31.920 --> 0:37:36.279 Bingo marker, So I say you gotta inc all of 0:37:36.320 --> 0:37:40.600 the windows. Russell pointed out the trailer park boys. And 0:37:40.920 --> 0:37:43.879 he has a photo here of Cyrus's Corvette where they 0:37:43.880 --> 0:37:46.319 wrote on the on the hood of the car dick 0:37:46.760 --> 0:37:49.359 with an arrow pointing at the driver. I think that's 0:37:49.360 --> 0:37:53.880 a good idea. I think that's pretty funny. Uh Chris says, 0:37:53.920 --> 0:37:57.600 clearly guests gone blocking emergency exits and is a safety 0:37:57.640 --> 0:38:01.160 hazard immediately in Pound the car are is what he 0:38:01.200 --> 0:38:05.240 had to say. Uh. Andre pointed out that Gagon parks 0:38:05.280 --> 0:38:10.640 like he's from Houston, right. Fred's very upset, He's he's sad. 0:38:10.680 --> 0:38:13.800 He said, who could park in Ben Mallory's parking spot? John? 0:38:13.880 --> 0:38:17.759 I thought John summed it up very well and from Colorado. 0:38:18.320 --> 0:38:20.600 He said, that's how they park west of the four 0:38:20.640 --> 0:38:25.440 oh five. And that's true. John, this is a douchebag move. 0:38:25.680 --> 0:38:28.719 But this is a move. The irony, though, is our 0:38:28.760 --> 0:38:31.279 studio and the garage is actually east of the four 0:38:31.320 --> 0:38:33.520 o five. I know, but you're parking like a west 0:38:33.560 --> 0:38:36.040 of the four five guy. That's why I wouldn't work where. 0:38:36.120 --> 0:38:37.880 I wouldn't go to that building if it was if 0:38:37.880 --> 0:38:40.800 they moved across the four or four oh five and 0:38:40.840 --> 0:38:42.399 the one on one in l A. But I would move. 0:38:42.600 --> 0:38:45.319 I wouldn't work there. I quit. I'm a pilot, said, 0:38:45.360 --> 0:38:47.239 when you make an entrance like that, you can park 0:38:47.280 --> 0:38:49.480 however you want. Good job by David. I thought that 0:38:49.520 --> 0:38:52.160 was probably the best one that you have about. How 0:38:52.160 --> 0:38:56.239 about Kelly from Honolulu? Man says, my son owns a 0:38:56.280 --> 0:39:00.440 towing company. We can have that car repode. That's great, Kelly. 0:39:00.440 --> 0:39:02.719 Can you get that on a boat? Can you get 0:39:02.760 --> 0:39:05.200 that on a boat? Please? There a lot of triggered people. 0:39:05.280 --> 0:39:10.120 It reminds me of twict. I'm just beginning here. People, 0:39:10.160 --> 0:39:14.240 are you have really soiled? I'll use that word again. 0:39:14.600 --> 0:39:18.279 Your your reputation even more. You can't use the same 0:39:18.280 --> 0:39:22.200 adjective during the same podcast. All right, let's see. Koli 0:39:22.840 --> 0:39:27.680 Klei writes in from Parts unknown and says, since he's there, 0:39:28.200 --> 0:39:32.000 do him a solid and check his tires by kicking 0:39:32.040 --> 0:39:37.360 off the tire stems. It's what that guy's recommending. Brent, 0:39:37.840 --> 0:39:40.880 longtime listener on the number one sports station the country, 0:39:41.000 --> 0:39:43.920 k FAN one hundred point three on the FM dial 0:39:44.000 --> 0:39:47.000 in Minneapolis. Do you know that's the number one sports 0:39:47.000 --> 0:39:48.680 station in the whole country? What is it? Is it 0:39:48.760 --> 0:39:52.920 Minnesota than Seattle? I don't know who's in number two. 0:39:52.960 --> 0:39:55.120 But I know that that the k fan is number 0:39:55.160 --> 0:39:57.920 one the most listened to sports talk radio station, and 0:39:58.480 --> 0:40:00.879 our show is on that we're and it's true, man, 0:40:00.920 --> 0:40:02.640 Even in the middle of the night, like I have 0:40:02.680 --> 0:40:04.640 the local radio in some cities, I feel like there's 0:40:04.680 --> 0:40:07.279 more people listening at three in the morning in Minnesota 0:40:07.680 --> 0:40:10.160 than there are when I've done mid days in like Denver. 0:40:10.480 --> 0:40:12.320 It's crazy, Yeah, because they're I think they have a 0:40:12.320 --> 0:40:16.719 blow towards to Well. I also believe they have no competition. 0:40:16.800 --> 0:40:19.759 I don't think there's any competitor in the market, and 0:40:19.800 --> 0:40:23.040 they cover the entire state. There's like a fan network 0:40:23.080 --> 0:40:26.840 around the state of Minnesota. So it's wild man. And 0:40:26.880 --> 0:40:29.040 then you know, all those teams usually blow and the 0:40:29.120 --> 0:40:31.279 Vikings have been a playoff team, but the Twins, I 0:40:31.280 --> 0:40:34.080 guess they've been twin They can't beat anybody, and the 0:40:34.320 --> 0:40:37.080 Wolves suck all right anyway, So Brent writes, and he says, 0:40:37.239 --> 0:40:40.960 here's the response from Fox Sports Radio Management quote, we 0:40:41.080 --> 0:40:44.719 have met with Mr Gagon and he has expressed in 0:40:44.800 --> 0:40:48.400 sere remorse and has fully explained his rationale behind his 0:40:48.480 --> 0:40:52.040 parking era. Therefore, this time FSR management will not be 0:40:52.080 --> 0:40:56.919 punishing Mr Gagon. Furthermore, any retaliation from Mr Mallard any 0:40:56.960 --> 0:41:01.759 of his Mallard Militia associates, uh will result in discipline 0:41:01.840 --> 0:41:04.719 two said parties. Uh, there you go, says that's that 0:41:04.800 --> 0:41:08.080 came right from Scotch Shapiro, who apparently is a big 0:41:08.080 --> 0:41:12.560 fan of what's his name, Rob May. I love it 0:41:12.600 --> 0:41:14.080 all right? You want more? I mean, I can go 0:41:14.120 --> 0:41:17.360 on on here. I do. I do take offense to 0:41:17.400 --> 0:41:21.320 the fact that you post on Instagram and on Facebook, 0:41:21.480 --> 0:41:26.680 which I'm not on Facebook thankfully, and Instagram I wasn't 0:41:26.760 --> 0:41:29.200 properly tagged, so you need to do a better drop 0:41:29.280 --> 0:41:31.960 of that. I did tag you on on the Instagram. 0:41:32.040 --> 0:41:34.200 I put your little stupid name on there. That's a 0:41:34.239 --> 0:41:36.600 great name. It's a good parking job. There's a lot 0:41:36.640 --> 0:41:39.160 of triggered people out there in this country. Ben it 0:41:39.280 --> 0:41:43.920 is absolutely william Sir Williams says he lives in the Bronx. 0:41:44.000 --> 0:41:45.840 He says, this is how we park out here in 0:41:45.880 --> 0:41:51.240 the Bronx during snowstorms. What he said, who was somebody 0:41:51.280 --> 0:41:54.200 from who is it from Utah? The recommend of the 0:41:54.239 --> 0:41:58.000 boot from Hawaii? No, somebody guy? Oh yeah, the guy 0:41:58.040 --> 0:42:00.880 from Utah. Yeah, that guy. That's his job. He's parking 0:42:00.880 --> 0:42:03.480 in forcement right around like I think he's in Salt 0:42:03.560 --> 0:42:05.920 Lake or outside Salt Lake, and he drives around at 0:42:06.000 --> 0:42:09.280 night booting people's cars. That's his gig. Can you imagine 0:42:09.360 --> 0:42:11.759 seeing that on your car? Waking up one day with 0:42:11.800 --> 0:42:14.319 a food on your car? Maybe too, that guy would 0:42:14.360 --> 0:42:17.240 do it. He said he would do it. Jimmy writes, 0:42:17.400 --> 0:42:22.239 because you're not Steve Harvey, move your vehicle. Yeah, Steve 0:42:22.280 --> 0:42:25.040 Harvey did that. We'd all laugh and say that's you know, 0:42:25.480 --> 0:42:27.919 do what you want. I'll lick your feet after you're done, 0:42:27.920 --> 0:42:30.239 I'll wash your cars. That's exactly how you guys play 0:42:30.280 --> 0:42:35.799 this out anybody else. Mike says, I go get some 0:42:35.960 --> 0:42:40.240 dogshit and uh put it on the door handle. Doggie 0:42:40.239 --> 0:42:43.280 do under his door handle. That's what Brian also says. 0:42:44.160 --> 0:42:47.319 Russell says, key that piece of ship. That's what he 0:42:47.360 --> 0:42:51.600 has to say. He's an idiot. To um, Emiliano says, 0:42:51.640 --> 0:42:56.440 have Roberto's primos come take tires and rims on brakes 0:43:00.000 --> 0:43:01.880 and has a good idea wrap the car in plastic. 0:43:02.320 --> 0:43:04.160 How about you remember this? They u see this in 0:43:04.200 --> 0:43:05.680 the NBA a lot. I don't know if they do anymore, 0:43:05.960 --> 0:43:09.120 fill the entire car with popcorn. Popcorn. Yeah, that's a 0:43:09.120 --> 0:43:11.480 good bit. That's a good that's a fun thing to do, 0:43:11.640 --> 0:43:13.960 but you gotta get access to it. I've I've heard 0:43:13.960 --> 0:43:17.319 of people do shaving cream under the door handle or 0:43:17.520 --> 0:43:20.200 vasselin on the doors, like the door handle and the 0:43:20.239 --> 0:43:24.280 doors um or eggs too. Or you could put something 0:43:24.280 --> 0:43:25.840 in the tail pipe, but I think you have to 0:43:25.880 --> 0:43:28.319 be careful because that could cause a serious problem. But 0:43:28.320 --> 0:43:32.520 there's like the yeah you want to puck really smells 0:43:32.840 --> 0:43:35.520 where they people that drive the car don't have access 0:43:35.560 --> 0:43:38.919 to it. Or fish, Yeah, like fish is a good one. 0:43:39.200 --> 0:43:41.640 The other thing you could do is you could write, like, 0:43:42.120 --> 0:43:45.080 you know, a message like hey, this guy's a dickhead, 0:43:45.360 --> 0:43:47.319 but you write it on the passenger side and you 0:43:47.360 --> 0:43:49.400 take the chance that the driver will not go to 0:43:49.480 --> 0:43:51.000 that side of the car, because most people when they 0:43:51.040 --> 0:43:53.319 go to their car, they don't walk around the car, 0:43:53.680 --> 0:43:55.200 and then that will be on the side of the 0:43:55.239 --> 0:43:57.160 car when the person is driving around that you know, Hey, 0:43:57.200 --> 0:44:00.040 this guy is an asshole, this guy's a schmuck. That 0:44:00.160 --> 0:44:04.800 kind of thing, Dan says. Dan writes in and regarding 0:44:04.840 --> 0:44:07.319 your parking here, He's from Maine. And he says, call 0:44:07.400 --> 0:44:10.359 a tow truck, tell them that this your car broke down. 0:44:10.480 --> 0:44:13.400 You need a toad to a repair shop, is what 0:44:13.560 --> 0:44:16.719 he what he recommended. Uh, so you can't read that 0:44:16.840 --> 0:44:20.040 on the air. Wait when you can't read that on 0:44:20.080 --> 0:44:22.839 the air on podcast, I guess we could. Shane says, 0:44:22.880 --> 0:44:25.880 should should you just let the air out of the tires. 0:44:26.560 --> 0:44:31.719 See what people don't understand is that one of those 0:44:31.760 --> 0:44:35.480 people would never do this, and two that requires work 0:44:35.520 --> 0:44:38.120 that none of you guys would ever do anyway. Like 0:44:38.200 --> 0:44:40.319 you guys have a hard time getting someone to change 0:44:40.360 --> 0:44:43.239 your oil every five thousand or ten thousand miles, let 0:44:43.280 --> 0:44:46.319 alone letting air out of someone's tire or trying to 0:44:46.440 --> 0:44:48.759 keep it or trying to mark it up with any 0:44:48.800 --> 0:44:54.560 kind of invisible ink. Dan Don letter Don writes and says, uh, 0:44:54.960 --> 0:44:58.799 you do know that you can say jackass, we can 0:44:58.840 --> 0:45:01.560 handle it. Well he is, he is a jackass. And 0:45:01.560 --> 0:45:03.400 then this guy is like, hey, there's other people. Just 0:45:03.480 --> 0:45:06.360 let the militia handle this. We'll take care of this guy. 0:45:07.000 --> 0:45:11.680 Carlos says, let Sean the hood guy funk with his car. Guy, Yeah, 0:45:11.680 --> 0:45:13.799 that's one of our listeners. You don't listen ricks as 0:45:13.840 --> 0:45:19.360 slashes tires? How about that? Have ever slashed someone's tires before? No, 0:45:20.480 --> 0:45:23.000 I have vandalized cars before, like I when I was 0:45:23.400 --> 0:45:27.719 really Yeah, wheneveryone started driving in high school. We me 0:45:27.800 --> 0:45:30.640 and my buddies on the football team. We uh, we 0:45:30.680 --> 0:45:32.480 had some guys on the team that we were goofing on. 0:45:32.920 --> 0:45:35.280 So we drove, like ten o'clock at night. We drove 0:45:35.320 --> 0:45:38.239 around and just picked up random ship on the side 0:45:38.280 --> 0:45:40.600 of the road to put on the people's car, our 0:45:40.640 --> 0:45:43.760 guys car, one of the other guys on the offensive line. 0:45:43.920 --> 0:45:47.239 And we even like picked up a shopping cart. We 0:45:47.320 --> 0:45:49.680 put it on top of the car. We wrapped it 0:45:49.719 --> 0:45:52.800 in toilet paper put rotting. There was like a rotting 0:45:52.840 --> 0:45:55.560 piece of fish, some leftover food that we put I 0:45:55.560 --> 0:45:57.719 mean we get all of it. That's pretty good. Be 0:45:57.840 --> 0:46:00.239 sure to catch live edition of the Ben Mallery Show 0:46:00.280 --> 0:46:04.200 weekdays at two am Eastern Pacific. Now, do you want 0:46:04.200 --> 0:46:08.120 to hear my karma from that story about my parking job? Okay, 0:46:09.760 --> 0:46:15.120 the home, No, but the following day. Um, the place 0:46:15.360 --> 0:46:19.080 I train at, there's a gym and an in and 0:46:19.120 --> 0:46:21.719 out right next to it. They're probably distance wise or 0:46:21.760 --> 0:46:25.480 probably about fifty yards away from each other. I get 0:46:25.520 --> 0:46:28.520 out of the gym, finished with the workout, and lo 0:46:28.680 --> 0:46:32.360 and behold on my car. I had a gift certificate 0:46:32.400 --> 0:46:35.560 for ten dollars for in and out. Someone placed it 0:46:35.640 --> 0:46:40.080 on the hood of my car. And it was a 0:46:40.120 --> 0:46:42.120 bunch of cars that were out in front of the gym. 0:46:42.560 --> 0:46:45.600 We all had in and out gift certificates and absolutely 0:46:45.640 --> 0:46:48.520 made my day. I went to get a double double 0:46:48.760 --> 0:46:51.439 right after. I thought it was really good. I thought 0:46:51.440 --> 0:46:54.000 it was I thought a nice touch to what I 0:46:54.040 --> 0:46:56.920 had done earlier in the week. Courtesy of the Premier 0:46:57.040 --> 0:47:00.239 Radio Studios. This is what you get for trying to 0:47:00.280 --> 0:47:02.440 rat out Jonas about a month or a month and 0:47:02.440 --> 0:47:04.960 a half ago, taking a picture of his car and 0:47:04.960 --> 0:47:07.879 then bitching about parking for him. And it wasn't even 0:47:08.000 --> 0:47:10.359 his truck. He tried to air me out a couple 0:47:10.360 --> 0:47:12.880 of months ago with my parking job because it was 0:47:13.120 --> 0:47:15.560 a couple of feet away from the back of the 0:47:16.280 --> 0:47:21.640 parking spot. Who cares, nobody, Nobody cares parking a different 0:47:21.680 --> 0:47:25.879 spot in a different lane. Let me explain something to you, dummy. Um, 0:47:26.000 --> 0:47:28.719 these are the kind of things you're a nuisance, is 0:47:28.760 --> 0:47:30.560 what you are. No I'm not. Do you understand that? 0:47:30.840 --> 0:47:33.279 Do you understand the word nuisance? Yes? I do, and 0:47:33.320 --> 0:47:35.800 I'm not. That's what you are. This is the kind 0:47:35.880 --> 0:47:39.560 of everyday little ship that's an inconvenience in an annoyance, 0:47:39.880 --> 0:47:43.040 and it's an irritation. You know. It is because you 0:47:43.120 --> 0:47:45.239 had to parces the kind of stuff and you had 0:47:45.239 --> 0:47:48.600 to go life more difficult. You had noy You irritate, 0:47:49.080 --> 0:47:53.520 you exasperate people because of this kind of stuff. And 0:47:53.719 --> 0:47:57.360 this is what leads to hostility. You don't even realize it. 0:47:57.480 --> 0:48:00.280 This is you don't even realize that you're agitating because 0:48:00.320 --> 0:48:03.919 people can relate to this because everyone's gone to park 0:48:04.000 --> 0:48:07.920 somewhere and some dick bag has has gone and parked, 0:48:08.280 --> 0:48:10.319 you know, two spaces and there's no You're at the 0:48:10.360 --> 0:48:12.640 mall on the weekend, you know, and you want to 0:48:12.680 --> 0:48:14.680 park and you find a space, and then you realize 0:48:14.840 --> 0:48:17.960 that the guy with the corvette parked in two spaces 0:48:18.280 --> 0:48:22.560 and took up the space. You understand. Yeah, then the 0:48:22.600 --> 0:48:25.319 backside that is you running to that same guy in 0:48:25.400 --> 0:48:27.719 a department store is probably picking a fight with a 0:48:27.760 --> 0:48:32.680 teller or someone in customer service over a free samples. Again, 0:48:32.920 --> 0:48:36.200 the exact kind of things that make life not enjoyable. 0:48:36.239 --> 0:48:38.680 I think you don't seem to think that. You think 0:48:38.719 --> 0:48:41.279 this is all funny. I think you're not going to 0:48:41.360 --> 0:48:46.600 be able to convert anyone convert not on the right 0:48:46.600 --> 0:48:48.920 side of history. I'm gonna I don't need to evangelize 0:48:48.960 --> 0:48:52.000 by this because everyone's already converted. They're all the believers 0:48:52.000 --> 0:48:55.000 with my doctrine. Oh boy, it's embarrassing. You got a 0:48:55.040 --> 0:48:58.279 lot of keyboard warriors that follow you. You know, if 0:48:58.320 --> 0:49:01.240 you ever get divorced, I think you'll have no problems 0:49:01.320 --> 0:49:04.080 picking up where you left off because you've got plenty 0:49:04.080 --> 0:49:06.040 of guys out there that will definitely date you when 0:49:06.080 --> 0:49:08.680 you become available. If you know you're jealous, because again, 0:49:08.800 --> 0:49:11.640 what am I jealous about? There's no guess gone. I 0:49:11.640 --> 0:49:14.680 don't need someone seeking my praises and kissing my toes, 0:49:15.000 --> 0:49:17.400 someone trying to wash my underwear when I soiled them. 0:49:17.560 --> 0:49:20.000 I mean, you know someone probably did that my own underwear. 0:49:20.000 --> 0:49:22.240 Would we should do that? We should put your dirty 0:49:22.360 --> 0:49:25.160 underwear on eBay and see how much you'll get sold for. 0:49:25.320 --> 0:49:27.439 I can guarantee you someone that listens to your show 0:49:27.480 --> 0:49:31.239 I actually buy it. Yeah, Okay, yeah, how much will 0:49:31.280 --> 0:49:33.200 they pay for it? I don't know. Put it on 0:49:33.239 --> 0:49:36.600 eBay Mallards soiled underwear. See if anybody seriously, I'll sell 0:49:36.680 --> 0:49:39.920 I have the underwear. I haven't watched him yet. Unless 0:49:39.920 --> 0:49:44.920 I have, why we'll do it all right. Anyway, you 0:49:44.920 --> 0:49:47.560 are the King of Douche. Congratulations on that. Time for 0:49:47.600 --> 0:49:50.719 our grab back segment. These are actual questions from actual listeners, 0:49:51.320 --> 0:49:55.160 and let's get into it on this one as well. 0:49:56.200 --> 0:49:59.640 This is from Gael in Apple Valley, California. Have some 0:49:59.640 --> 0:50:02.600 friends at live in Apple Valley. Gail says, my husband 0:50:03.239 --> 0:50:06.800 thinks that talk is overrated and he hates the Clippers. 0:50:06.840 --> 0:50:09.760 Can you please explain to me why he loves listening 0:50:09.800 --> 0:50:13.600 to your podcast. That's stuff from Gail. Well, he's clearly 0:50:13.640 --> 0:50:17.600 a discerning customer, Gail, And yeah, we do talk about 0:50:17.640 --> 0:50:19.879 the Clippers from time to time, but regardless of that, 0:50:20.600 --> 0:50:26.279 it is entertaining. How would I describe the show, it's uh, 0:50:26.440 --> 0:50:30.759 sports chatter, loosely sports chat o chatter. If I could talk, 0:50:30.800 --> 0:50:35.080 that would help. But yeah, people, I have noticed people 0:50:35.080 --> 0:50:39.480 have really enjoyed my meltdowns on the astros. That maybe 0:50:39.480 --> 0:50:41.880 that's why he listens. Because I have just I'm like 0:50:41.920 --> 0:50:46.080 a nuclear bomb every night. Here I'm in route nation 0:50:46.600 --> 0:50:48.680 over the Astros. So maybe that's why. I don't know, 0:50:48.719 --> 0:50:52.239 but I'm glad he's listening. Thank you, Gail's husband. But 0:50:52.360 --> 0:50:54.400 prior to the reason is there's not a lot of 0:50:54.400 --> 0:50:57.719 people in the mainstream media that have taken shots at 0:50:57.719 --> 0:51:01.400 the Astros, like with the with a bloody bat, like 0:51:01.440 --> 0:51:03.799 everyone everyone. There's a lot of people softball in this 0:51:03.920 --> 0:51:07.400 thing and kind of adhering to what Manfred has said 0:51:07.520 --> 0:51:09.880 and now what the Astros are saying with their interviews 0:51:09.880 --> 0:51:14.200 with Ken Rosenthal. I have no idea why there's a 0:51:14.200 --> 0:51:16.520 lot of outrage. Theory. I have a theory of y 0:51:16.600 --> 0:51:19.040 all right, I thought about it, because you're right. I mean, 0:51:19.040 --> 0:51:23.960 the media elites, the cover baseball, the academia crowd, they're 0:51:24.000 --> 0:51:27.960 not partaking in the feeding frenzy. It's it's the overnight 0:51:28.080 --> 0:51:31.200 radio guy that is doing that night. There's two reasons. A. 0:51:31.960 --> 0:51:34.160 I believe a lot of these in our business and radio, 0:51:34.440 --> 0:51:36.400 a lot of these people were caught off guard. They 0:51:36.440 --> 0:51:39.640 do not want to talk about baseball, they don't and 0:51:39.640 --> 0:51:42.480 they were caught nappy. This is a huge scandal to me. 0:51:42.560 --> 0:51:45.320 This is not even a baseball story. It's a scandal story, 0:51:45.600 --> 0:51:48.720 and there is no better story than a scandal story. 0:51:48.920 --> 0:51:52.560 The greatest story of all is the scandal. I ranted 0:51:52.600 --> 0:51:54.759 about this. I did a little rant on the the 0:51:54.880 --> 0:51:56.960 Show the other night about this, and I believe it 0:51:57.040 --> 0:52:02.000 to be true. The scandal is the gift. And so yeah, 0:52:02.480 --> 0:52:05.600 you say it's a baseball story because it's about the Astros, 0:52:05.600 --> 0:52:08.600 but it's really about the scandal. And every morsel of 0:52:08.640 --> 0:52:12.040 a scandal should be chewed up, devoured like a delicious cake. 0:52:12.360 --> 0:52:14.480 When you do my job and when you work in radio, 0:52:14.520 --> 0:52:15.839 and there's a lot of these guys that would rather 0:52:15.840 --> 0:52:19.080 talk about NFL draft rumors, which is what we'd normally 0:52:19.080 --> 0:52:22.120 be talking about, or they'd rather break down, you know, 0:52:22.239 --> 0:52:27.080 the latest NBA scuttle but whatever Lebron James says. But no, 0:52:27.520 --> 0:52:29.160 I want to be part. I want to be one 0:52:29.200 --> 0:52:31.520 of the piranha. And there's blood in the water and 0:52:31.560 --> 0:52:34.600 I'm part of the feeding frenzy and it's it's great. 0:52:34.600 --> 0:52:39.719 I mean, there's many reasons why scandals are wonderful. They're tittilating, right, 0:52:39.880 --> 0:52:42.120 you know, other people getting in trouble, breaking the rules. 0:52:42.160 --> 0:52:45.879 That's kind of cool. Uh. We can take pleasure out 0:52:45.880 --> 0:52:48.000 of this. There's some pleasure and there's no real punishment. 0:52:48.040 --> 0:52:51.520 Normally we take pleasure out of the punishment, and uh. 0:52:51.560 --> 0:52:54.160 In this case, there's some people taking pleasure because the 0:52:54.160 --> 0:52:56.759 Astros got away with it. A right, that's the other 0:52:56.800 --> 0:52:58.880 thing here. They got away with this. That's that's the 0:52:58.880 --> 0:53:02.040 thing that's upset me. The players, these little snot nose punks, 0:53:02.480 --> 0:53:06.640 these Mama Luke's and uh. And there's also a pleasure 0:53:06.680 --> 0:53:09.799 that you get because typically this hasn't been the case 0:53:09.840 --> 0:53:13.799 with the Astros because they're not apologizing. But normally in 0:53:13.800 --> 0:53:17.120 a scandal you have somebody apologize and asked for forgiveness. 0:53:17.680 --> 0:53:21.680 That hasn't happened, but normally does. But the most important 0:53:21.680 --> 0:53:24.759 part of a scandal is it is a distraction from 0:53:24.760 --> 0:53:28.120 the tedious nonsense that I just referenced on sports radio 0:53:28.160 --> 0:53:32.080 in February when we're talking about every made up rumor. 0:53:32.160 --> 0:53:36.200 These NFL guys, they throw spaghetti against the walls. They 0:53:36.239 --> 0:53:40.000 spin the wheel of speculation hoping something sticks. Uh. And 0:53:40.040 --> 0:53:41.879 then so that's normally what we do. And I listen, 0:53:41.880 --> 0:53:44.560 I'm not against that kind of radio. But to me, 0:53:44.600 --> 0:53:47.439 if you can give me a scandal, I'm gonna take 0:53:47.440 --> 0:53:49.759 the scandal. Oh yeah, absolutely. The other thing that not 0:53:50.200 --> 0:53:53.600 a lot of people have even discussed is that this 0:53:53.640 --> 0:53:56.680 was an opportunity for this to be a criminal investigation too, 0:53:56.680 --> 0:53:59.000 because when you go down to the you go down 0:53:59.000 --> 0:54:01.440 to the heavy meat and potatoes of this. This is 0:54:01.920 --> 0:54:05.759 this consumer fraud, isn't it? Where you have it is? 0:54:05.800 --> 0:54:08.919 I mean, now, if the conspiracy, like you said, yeah, 0:54:08.920 --> 0:54:11.800 baseball has a lot of protections from the federal government. 0:54:11.960 --> 0:54:14.920 And the thing that Baseball really has going for them 0:54:15.120 --> 0:54:18.080 is that there's an election season, and a lot of 0:54:18.360 --> 0:54:22.399 Washington d C. Is so focused on the Democratic race 0:54:22.480 --> 0:54:25.680 and Donald Trump and all that that this is in 0:54:25.719 --> 0:54:28.560 the back of their minds, just in the back burner. 0:54:29.080 --> 0:54:31.640 But if this was not a presidential election year, I 0:54:31.719 --> 0:54:35.920 would think that already we would have had Jose Altuve, Bregman, 0:54:36.400 --> 0:54:41.439 a j Hine cheff Luno called into the Capitol Hill 0:54:41.480 --> 0:54:46.000 area there and have a special you know, congressional hearing 0:54:46.560 --> 0:54:48.839 about this. Well the best part because you're you're looking 0:54:48.840 --> 0:54:50.960 at what these guys got paid with bonuses for the 0:54:50.960 --> 0:54:53.800 World Series. Yeah, yeah, exactly. It's it's you're talking about 0:54:53.800 --> 0:54:58.759 four hundred thousand dollars or almost five hundred thousand dollars 0:54:59.320 --> 0:55:02.560 in in buses. Yeah, and it's you don't know what 0:55:02.600 --> 0:55:05.719 you got from Boston, and but you definitely know you 0:55:05.760 --> 0:55:08.879 got in two thousand seventeen. And then obviously Carlos kre 0:55:08.960 --> 0:55:13.640 had taken shots at Cody Bellinger with ken h the 0:55:13.680 --> 0:55:15.919 same guy that got the immunity is saying, you got 0:55:15.920 --> 0:55:18.840 to know the facts. Well, I can't get the facts 0:55:18.880 --> 0:55:21.120 if you've been given immunity, idiot, don't you just want 0:55:21.120 --> 0:55:23.239 to kick him in the nuts. But it's like, it's 0:55:23.680 --> 0:55:27.839 this is racketeering, right. The racketeering is obtaining or extorting 0:55:27.840 --> 0:55:31.719 money illegally or carrying on illegal business activities. That is, 0:55:32.160 --> 0:55:36.600 would anyone disagree this is racketeering. The Astros committed racketeering. Um, 0:55:36.920 --> 0:55:38.640 you know, and these some of these guys should be 0:55:38.640 --> 0:55:42.879 brought up on grand larceny charges because they're frauds. Uh, 0:55:42.920 --> 0:55:46.839 these these players, but it will be gotten gains, that's 0:55:46.840 --> 0:55:50.960 how it works. They should not should avoid the trophy, tried, 0:55:51.520 --> 0:55:56.000 convicted and executed, Good afternoon, good evening, and good night. Yeah, 0:55:56.960 --> 0:55:59.719 just imagine they're part of I mean, well, yea Manchester 0:55:59.800 --> 0:56:02.319 was at Manchester City or Manchester United. I think it's 0:56:02.320 --> 0:56:05.600 Manchester City. They got banned for two years. How embarrassing 0:56:05.640 --> 0:56:09.160 is that European soccer gets it right in baseball does not? 0:56:09.239 --> 0:56:12.480 How embarrassing is that for America? Yeah, it's it's a 0:56:12.520 --> 0:56:15.680 freaking disgrace, all right. Anyway, Joe writes in with a 0:56:15.719 --> 0:56:18.040 political crush. He says, do you think that Roger Stone 0:56:18.080 --> 0:56:21.560 is a tough guy or just a phony? Uh? He says, 0:56:21.560 --> 0:56:24.000 a trump phony. He says, I love Roger Stone. I 0:56:24.040 --> 0:56:27.520 think Roger Stone is one of the great characters of 0:56:27.520 --> 0:56:32.040 our time and was part of the great Just Wonderful 0:56:33.160 --> 0:56:37.120 um documentary on Netflix, Get Me Roger Stone, which is 0:56:37.160 --> 0:56:41.160 one of my favorite, one of my favorite documentaries in 0:56:41.200 --> 0:56:44.640 recent years. Here and I saw this week Roger Stone 0:56:44.640 --> 0:56:49.160 got about forty months. And that's a federal sentence, right, Yeah, 0:56:49.280 --> 0:56:51.759 so you're typically you have to serve out at least 0:56:51.760 --> 0:56:56.560 eight of a federal offense if you are convicted. And 0:56:56.600 --> 0:56:58.439 so what are we looking at here? Do the math 0:56:58.480 --> 0:57:00.360 on that? Guess they said there would be no math. 0:57:00.560 --> 0:57:05.080 So if you're doing eighty times four, that's what uh 0:57:05.160 --> 0:57:08.200 thirty two? So thirty two months. So he's gonna have 0:57:08.280 --> 0:57:10.920 to spend a couple of years in jail. To spend 0:57:11.040 --> 0:57:15.080 two and almost three years in jail right now, I'm 0:57:15.120 --> 0:57:17.960 sure this is gonna be appealed. Yeah, it should be 0:57:18.000 --> 0:57:22.320 if he's got a pretty good case to appeal. And yeah, 0:57:22.400 --> 0:57:23.880 after I would say he's gonna have to go to 0:57:23.920 --> 0:57:25.160 if he does end up going to jail, you have 0:57:25.160 --> 0:57:28.280 to go to jail for until I'm gonna go on 0:57:28.320 --> 0:57:33.800 a limb here and say till January. If Trump wins, 0:57:33.880 --> 0:57:36.720 he will then get a either either he loses or 0:57:36.720 --> 0:57:38.360 he wins, but either way, on the way out of 0:57:38.360 --> 0:57:42.200 Trump will pardon him. I just I just love how 0:57:42.320 --> 0:57:45.360 federal agents there was, what thirty or forty of them, 0:57:45.520 --> 0:57:49.200 plus CNN had a storm a sixty five seven year 0:57:49.240 --> 0:57:54.360 old man's house and then bring him out in shackles. Yeah, 0:57:54.480 --> 0:57:56.280 you know the old things. I mean, listen, you can 0:57:56.280 --> 0:57:58.080 say what you wanted about Roger Stone. You might not 0:57:58.120 --> 0:57:59.880 agree with him politically, the guy is one of the 0:58:00.080 --> 0:58:04.720 great characters in American politics of of all time. He's 0:58:04.800 --> 0:58:07.680 just I was so I was taken a back by 0:58:07.680 --> 0:58:09.480 how good that documentary was. I didn't know a lot 0:58:09.560 --> 0:58:11.080 of I'd heard about Roger Stone. I didn't know a 0:58:11.120 --> 0:58:13.080 lot about him but it was it was crazy. Everyone's 0:58:13.080 --> 0:58:15.040 got a lot of dirt. Yeah, he know, he knows 0:58:15.040 --> 0:58:18.480 where the bodies are buried, which is a blessing and 0:58:18.520 --> 0:58:21.840 a curse at the same time. Uh, let's hear Mike 0:58:21.880 --> 0:58:24.640 and Japan says, has Gascon ever injured anyone with his 0:58:24.680 --> 0:58:27.040 pathetic parking sales? Gascon? Have you ever heard anyone by 0:58:27.040 --> 0:58:29.960 your parking if you backed someone over? No, I've injured 0:58:30.000 --> 0:58:34.000 someone driving, but I haven't injured in and parking yet, thankfully. 0:58:34.200 --> 0:58:36.160 All Right, Mark in Ottawa writes, and he says, if 0:58:36.240 --> 0:58:38.640 Eddie found a new job and you were forced to 0:58:38.640 --> 0:58:42.320 pick between Gagon and Ralph as your number two for 0:58:42.360 --> 0:58:45.200 the rest of your career, who would you pick? All Right, Mark, 0:58:45.240 --> 0:58:47.000 I'm gonna go this is a this is a tough question, 0:58:47.000 --> 0:58:49.760 like this is like Sophie's choice. Um, but I'm gonna 0:58:49.800 --> 0:58:52.320 go with not to be above what I'm gonna go. No, 0:58:52.440 --> 0:58:53.760 I would not want to have either one of these, 0:58:54.000 --> 0:58:56.240 but I guess I would probably choose Ralph because what 0:58:56.280 --> 0:58:57.720 I would do is I just changed the locks on 0:58:57.760 --> 0:58:59.600 the door so Ralph couldn't come in and harass me 0:59:00.120 --> 0:59:02.640 every every break that we have. We not that we're 0:59:02.640 --> 0:59:04.760 supposed to ever break but every pause that we take. 0:59:05.720 --> 0:59:07.920 But I wouldn't pick you, guess because you can't handle 0:59:07.920 --> 0:59:11.680 the overnights. You're a daytime guy. You know. It's it's fine. 0:59:12.080 --> 0:59:14.760 It's not for everybody. A little tough guy. I have 0:59:14.800 --> 0:59:16.520 a little great to work the overnight. Yeah, yeah, I 0:59:16.560 --> 0:59:20.520 gotta work an overnight update shift. Um with a lot 0:59:20.560 --> 0:59:22.960 of things not trending at two o'clock in the morning, 0:59:23.000 --> 0:59:25.280 three o'clock in the morning. What you're talking about, you 0:59:25.280 --> 0:59:26.720 gonna have some fire in your in your belly. You 0:59:26.840 --> 0:59:32.960 gotta talk about I always have the questionable games of 0:59:33.040 --> 0:59:36.960 note and um, yeah, I mean we do that midway 0:59:37.000 --> 0:59:39.960 through the season. In the end, there's a lot of 0:59:40.560 --> 0:59:44.000 it happens overnight. We get people arrested, in people dying 0:59:44.080 --> 0:59:46.640 while on the radio. I I did do Kobe Bryant's 0:59:46.680 --> 0:59:49.200 death on a on a Sunday morning at ten thirty. 0:59:49.320 --> 0:59:51.480 Heard you really handle that well? I didn't. I handled 0:59:51.480 --> 0:59:55.520 it extremely well. Had watch had calls from from Don Martin, 0:59:55.600 --> 0:59:59.440 your boss, um, from from Steve Harmon saying it did 0:59:59.440 --> 1:00:02.520 a great job. Hub and uh, you know, while's up 1:00:02.880 --> 1:00:05.640 doing this reporting it on what was trending you were asleep, 1:00:05.680 --> 1:00:07.080 so I had to text you and wake you up, 1:00:07.120 --> 1:00:10.000 and uh, yeah, you weren't too thrilled about it. Yeah, 1:00:10.040 --> 1:00:12.280 you like sending message here you so and so died. 1:00:13.000 --> 1:00:15.919 Thank you. Glad to know somebody die. You don't want 1:00:15.920 --> 1:00:18.880 me a part of an overnight show anyway? What's that? 1:00:19.040 --> 1:00:21.040 You don't want me part of your overnight show anyway? 1:00:21.360 --> 1:00:23.000 I know, I don't think you can handle. You'd end 1:00:23.080 --> 1:00:25.080 up in the hospital. No, I just it's one of 1:00:25.080 --> 1:00:27.760 those things when you're you're accustomed to having people just 1:00:28.280 --> 1:00:31.360 throw rose pedals at you and feed you fruit and 1:00:31.480 --> 1:00:34.000 serenade you and all that stuff. It's, uh, it's a 1:00:34.040 --> 1:00:36.200 little bit different with me. I tend to push back 1:00:36.240 --> 1:00:38.040 a little bit and not be so foaming at the 1:00:38.080 --> 1:00:40.800 mouth as some of your other fanboys. Be sure to 1:00:40.880 --> 1:00:43.600 catch live editions of The Ben Maller Show weekdays at 1:00:43.640 --> 1:00:47.440 two am Eastern eleven pm Pacific on Fox Sports Radio 1:00:47.600 --> 1:00:51.320 and the I Heart Radio app. Here's a depressing fun fact, 1:00:51.440 --> 1:00:55.760 just pressing fun fact. Yeah. Every second there there they say, 1:00:55.800 --> 1:00:59.400 roughly fifty nine million people die every year, right, so 1:00:59.440 --> 1:01:02.040 they've done the average. That means about two people every 1:01:02.080 --> 1:01:06.840 second on average, more than a hundred sixty thousand people 1:01:06.920 --> 1:01:11.160 die every day. About that? Not coronavirus induced. No, I 1:01:11.160 --> 1:01:13.000 mean it just happens. People get old, they die, they 1:01:13.040 --> 1:01:15.520 have accidents. I mean, this is what happens. Can we 1:01:15.600 --> 1:01:17.520 not talk about death today? I mean we've done a 1:01:17.520 --> 1:01:20.320 great job the last night. I'm sorry, but yeah, yeah, 1:01:20.360 --> 1:01:22.760 all of a sudden, I have more questions here, jose Right, 1:01:22.840 --> 1:01:27.200 since this, what's your earliest memory you can recall? Um, 1:01:27.240 --> 1:01:31.160 I've been asked this before, Jose My. I don't remember 1:01:31.160 --> 1:01:35.880 a lot. I have, just like everyone else, childhood amnesia. Right, 1:01:35.920 --> 1:01:40.000 I have childhood amnesia. I forgot a lot um. But 1:01:40.600 --> 1:01:44.200 the one, the one memory, the first memory I can 1:01:44.280 --> 1:01:48.080 really recall where I was. I was clear as day 1:01:48.640 --> 1:01:54.720 was when Ronald Reagan was shot like that. I think 1:01:54.760 --> 1:01:58.840 that was in n one and I because I was 1:01:58.880 --> 1:02:01.600 on the school bus and they had the guy had 1:02:01.640 --> 1:02:04.160 the radio, the news radio station was on in the 1:02:04.160 --> 1:02:06.160 school bus and I still remember and I was like 1:02:06.240 --> 1:02:09.480 the last kid on the school bus, and so the 1:02:09.480 --> 1:02:11.080 guy turned the radio all the way up and they 1:02:11.080 --> 1:02:14.520 were like these news bulletins. President Ronald Reagan has been 1:02:14.560 --> 1:02:18.320 shot and wounded in Washington, d C. He's an emergency surgery. 1:02:18.440 --> 1:02:21.240 Right now, he's getting out of his limo for some 1:02:21.240 --> 1:02:24.520 some speech in d C or whatever. And uh, you know, 1:02:24.520 --> 1:02:27.160 the attempted assassination. And so I remember that, I because 1:02:27.200 --> 1:02:29.680 I was then the reporter. I then when I got 1:02:29.720 --> 1:02:31.600 off the school bus, I ran to my mom, Hey, Mom, 1:02:32.520 --> 1:02:34.640 the president were shot. You know, an idea her the 1:02:34.680 --> 1:02:38.040 whole thing. And that's my first memory. What about you, gas, 1:02:38.920 --> 1:02:41.000 I have a couple of them. Actually happened in the 1:02:41.040 --> 1:02:45.120 same game. I was playing little league baseball on left handed. 1:02:46.040 --> 1:02:48.120 One of my coaches actually got me a left handed 1:02:48.120 --> 1:02:51.440 catcher's glove and a game that doesn't say a lot 1:02:51.480 --> 1:02:54.320 about your parking that you're left handed. That's okay, um, 1:02:54.320 --> 1:02:57.360 we're smarter than right hander's um. Anyways, the game that 1:02:57.440 --> 1:03:01.560 I played in and caught in, I I had the 1:03:01.760 --> 1:03:04.960 buster posey rule not invoked. I got ran over at 1:03:05.000 --> 1:03:09.880 home plate by this humongous kid and uh somehow held 1:03:09.880 --> 1:03:11.760 out of the ball, and a good job by whoever 1:03:11.760 --> 1:03:14.200 that kid he was. He was called out, but I 1:03:14.240 --> 1:03:18.760 remember just being launched like head over heels. It was. 1:03:18.840 --> 1:03:21.080 It was pretty traumatic. I was so excited about being 1:03:21.120 --> 1:03:23.840 able to catch and call a game. I did it 1:03:24.200 --> 1:03:26.160 play at the plate. I thought I was tough, but 1:03:26.200 --> 1:03:29.240 I got truck stick that was absolutely brutal. Do your 1:03:29.360 --> 1:03:31.560 video of that? Does your dad have video? Your mom 1:03:31.640 --> 1:03:36.520 a video? No? I do you What was your favorite 1:03:36.560 --> 1:03:41.720 show growing up as a kid. Um, that's a good question. 1:03:41.840 --> 1:03:44.320 I when I was little, I liked I was gonna 1:03:44.360 --> 1:03:47.680 be a cop or a fireman, so I loved There 1:03:47.720 --> 1:03:51.040 was a show called Chips with Pontorello. I love that show. 1:03:51.160 --> 1:03:54.919 And there was a show called Emergency. Oh I remember that. Yeah, 1:03:55.040 --> 1:03:58.160 it was like about paramedics. Yes, and I loved that show. 1:03:58.200 --> 1:04:00.680 In fact, you live west of the four oh five 1:04:00.840 --> 1:04:02.840 is where that fire station is they used on the 1:04:02.880 --> 1:04:05.360 TV show No Kidding, And I'd like to I want 1:04:05.360 --> 1:04:07.640 to go buy there sometime because I, you know, just 1:04:07.680 --> 1:04:09.480 two memories watching that show when I was a kid. 1:04:09.520 --> 1:04:11.560 That's how bad television was. Those are my shows that 1:04:11.600 --> 1:04:13.280 I watched when I was a kid. That in like 1:04:13.360 --> 1:04:16.360 Tom and Jerry cartoons and Sunday Morning they had all 1:04:16.360 --> 1:04:18.200 the greatest cartoons in the world on TV. Had to 1:04:18.200 --> 1:04:20.840 wait till Sunday morning. Yeah, and then we had professional 1:04:20.880 --> 1:04:23.760 wrestling on Sunday, you know, Saturday morning as well. That 1:04:23.880 --> 1:04:28.120 was big this Weekend Baseball, This Weekend Baseball. Oh man, 1:04:28.240 --> 1:04:30.920 that was before the national Game of the week. Yes, 1:04:31.240 --> 1:04:34.240 mine for twin notes around the major leagues. You know, 1:04:34.280 --> 1:04:37.920 I learned I learned from Frank Viola on This Weekend 1:04:37.920 --> 1:04:41.440 Baseball to throw the circle change because Mel Allen did 1:04:41.480 --> 1:04:43.640 a feature and Frank Viola that was his big pitch 1:04:43.680 --> 1:04:46.320 for the Twins. Yeah, and uh, and I learned. I 1:04:46.320 --> 1:04:49.840 tried to throw it. Literally, Yeah, we're gonna get with it. No, 1:04:49.960 --> 1:04:51.840 I sucked. It was terrible and one of my favorite 1:04:51.840 --> 1:04:53.840 shows that well, actually I liked it, but I didn't 1:04:53.840 --> 1:04:55.800 like it. I know, you don't get along with him 1:04:55.840 --> 1:05:00.400 too well. Was was Rescued nine one one? Yeah, I 1:05:00.440 --> 1:05:02.600 don't know. Do you remember that show? No, I don't 1:05:02.640 --> 1:05:05.960 really know. Well, William Shatner was the host of that show, 1:05:06.680 --> 1:05:09.680 and so it was a docuseries based on It was 1:05:10.040 --> 1:05:13.959 like Cops, but before Cops, whether to talk about things 1:05:14.000 --> 1:05:15.640 that would happened, whether it was in l A or 1:05:15.640 --> 1:05:19.240 Orange County, like crime scene investigations and murders and robbery 1:05:19.800 --> 1:05:22.560 and all that stuff. But the music the open, and 1:05:22.600 --> 1:05:25.720 then here comes Shatner and you know you're you're a kid, 1:05:25.840 --> 1:05:27.360 and you know, your dad's a cops so it's kind 1:05:27.400 --> 1:05:28.880 of like, oh, ship, this is what he's in the 1:05:28.920 --> 1:05:31.240 middle of, you know. Yeah, yeah, no, I I liked 1:05:31.520 --> 1:05:34.080 also well, Fred Dryer a friend of the show Hunter 1:05:34.480 --> 1:05:36.840 and Hunter. Yes, that was a good show. There was 1:05:36.920 --> 1:05:40.680 called a show called Swat. Yeah, it was a cheeseball thing. 1:05:40.920 --> 1:05:44.880 Did you watch Killed? Did you watch Mash? I did 1:05:44.920 --> 1:05:47.200 a little bit because that was like the number one 1:05:47.200 --> 1:05:49.680 show when I was a little kid. Yeah, and my 1:05:49.760 --> 1:05:53.040 parents would watch it. So yeah, we had that on 1:05:53.160 --> 1:05:55.760 from time to time. A questions keep coming in This 1:05:55.840 --> 1:06:00.160 is a new in Owensboro, Kentucky, and the news as 1:06:00.360 --> 1:06:02.640 who is your favorite colleague at Fox Sports Radio? And 1:06:02.640 --> 1:06:04.640 do not say gag on? Well, of course I wouldn't 1:06:04.640 --> 1:06:06.760 say that because you guys do a podcast to give 1:06:06.760 --> 1:06:10.400 the same question and rules apply to David well a 1:06:10.520 --> 1:06:13.080 new You know you're trying to get me to pick favorites. 1:06:13.120 --> 1:06:16.120 I would never do that unless I would um My 1:06:16.120 --> 1:06:19.200 my all time favorite employee Fox Sports Radio as a 1:06:19.240 --> 1:06:21.560 former employee. He's now part of the Fox Sports Radio 1:06:21.560 --> 1:06:26.439 Alumni association the TV Dentist, so he doesn't count. Um 1:06:26.520 --> 1:06:28.640 I get along with like I get along with pretty 1:06:28.720 --> 1:06:30.760 much everybody, and there's nobody. There's no real douche bag 1:06:30.800 --> 1:06:33.400 that works in a place that's in the building. Um, 1:06:33.560 --> 1:06:38.280 but I would say like Jonas. Uh. But you know 1:06:38.320 --> 1:06:40.520 the guy I love, I love hanging out with and 1:06:40.640 --> 1:06:44.800 talking shop is Rob Parker. I get such a kick 1:06:44.800 --> 1:06:47.240 out of Rob Parker. I love it. He's a very 1:06:47.240 --> 1:06:49.640 interesting live he was a baseball writer for a long time. 1:06:50.040 --> 1:06:53.640 He worked at ESPN. He's even those rotating gas bags 1:06:53.640 --> 1:06:56.000 with Skip Bayliss and all that. I think Rob's awesome. 1:06:56.040 --> 1:06:58.520 So I love I love hanging out with Rob. We 1:06:58.520 --> 1:07:00.720 we in fact, we need to have dinner gas John. 1:07:00.800 --> 1:07:03.960 We need to have a power dinner with with these 1:07:03.960 --> 1:07:06.800 guys get together and they talk. Yeah, we definitely need 1:07:06.840 --> 1:07:08.600 to do that. I think I will agree with you 1:07:08.640 --> 1:07:12.320 with Rob because I didn't know Rob prior to his 1:07:12.400 --> 1:07:15.920 day's ESPN. So when he came here along with Cris Brussard, 1:07:16.120 --> 1:07:17.920 it was like a breath of fresh air. They're just 1:07:17.920 --> 1:07:21.400 different takes, different guys, and plus, I don't know, it's 1:07:21.440 --> 1:07:22.920 just something about it. I know there's a lot of 1:07:22.960 --> 1:07:26.520 people that love football and hockey and basketball, but when 1:07:26.520 --> 1:07:29.720 he talked to baseball people, they can just talk and 1:07:29.760 --> 1:07:32.560 talk for a while, and it just feels like hanging 1:07:32.560 --> 1:07:35.400 out with Rob and bullshitting with him about different things. 1:07:35.480 --> 1:07:38.560 We could just talk forever, and it's so in depth 1:07:38.600 --> 1:07:40.360 with baseball, but then you get to go on his 1:07:40.480 --> 1:07:43.600 career and where he's traveled. And yeah, he was a 1:07:43.680 --> 1:07:45.600 kid when he covered the Yankees. I think he was 1:07:45.640 --> 1:07:48.680 twenty one years old when he was on the Yankees beat, 1:07:48.800 --> 1:07:51.920 which was unprecedented because oftentimes when he said with his 1:07:51.960 --> 1:07:55.720 paper was that they were required to cover prep sports 1:07:55.760 --> 1:07:59.040 in high school sports. But he got launched right away 1:07:59.800 --> 1:08:02.040 and obviously covering the Yankees as a kid and going 1:08:02.080 --> 1:08:04.680 to Detroit and he's been all over the place. So yeah, 1:08:04.880 --> 1:08:07.720 I mean, and I think we I wasn't never a sportswriter, 1:08:07.920 --> 1:08:11.120 but I got started when I was nineteen. I was 1:08:11.200 --> 1:08:13.600 covering Major League Baseball at the time. So I have 1:08:13.720 --> 1:08:16.519 some fond memories of the early days. Guys that I 1:08:16.600 --> 1:08:20.040 was cheering for for booing a few months earlier, and 1:08:20.040 --> 1:08:22.080 all of a sudden, I'm interviewing them. It was it 1:08:22.160 --> 1:08:25.080 was crazy, but yeah, I would say Rob Parker's And 1:08:25.080 --> 1:08:26.800 Plus the thing about Rob is I feel like me 1:08:26.880 --> 1:08:32.000 and Rob have the same the same boiler plate of 1:08:32.040 --> 1:08:35.000 how to do radio or happening, a lot of opinions 1:08:35.080 --> 1:08:37.519 and a lot of you know, we I feel like 1:08:37.520 --> 1:08:40.160 it's the similar thing where you're not in. The glass 1:08:40.200 --> 1:08:42.679 isn't always half full, it's half empty and broken. Yeah. 1:08:42.800 --> 1:08:45.160 But well that's the other thing too, is that you 1:08:45.240 --> 1:08:48.240 guys aren't grabbing ankles over anybody either. There's a few 1:08:48.240 --> 1:08:52.400 of that little pompons and and and a little powder, 1:08:52.439 --> 1:08:56.960 a little cushion on their seat and there's a yeah, yeah, absolutely. 1:08:56.960 --> 1:09:00.920 I mean Rob is outspoken, he's frank, he's he's clever, 1:09:01.080 --> 1:09:02.960 and those are all things I aspire to be. I'm 1:09:03.000 --> 1:09:05.960 not I'm not usually those things. But entertaining, I think 1:09:05.960 --> 1:09:08.480 the most important thing in radio. People forget this is entertainment. 1:09:09.040 --> 1:09:11.160 But there's ways you can get to entertainment. You just 1:09:11.160 --> 1:09:14.320 want to be boring, as there's different ways to cut 1:09:14.360 --> 1:09:16.559 the cake. You want to be loved or hated, but 1:09:16.560 --> 1:09:19.640 you don't want to be in between. Yeah, absolutely, you 1:09:19.640 --> 1:09:22.599 don't want to be in between. Uh let's see here, 1:09:22.600 --> 1:09:25.800 you get a couple more time is getting away from 1:09:25.880 --> 1:09:27.519 us though, and some other stuff that we want to 1:09:27.520 --> 1:09:32.000 get to. Uh. I always see here, what else? Uh, 1:09:32.080 --> 1:09:36.839 Carlos in Bang Bang Houston, Texas says, I am pissed 1:09:37.000 --> 1:09:39.240 that Sean the Hood Guy did not win Caller of 1:09:39.280 --> 1:09:42.439 the Year. Stop letting Weedman back on the show. Uh, 1:09:42.479 --> 1:09:44.120 there you go, he says. Anyway, have you guys ever 1:09:44.160 --> 1:09:46.760 been part of a natural disaster to a point where 1:09:46.760 --> 1:09:49.920 you all had to be evacuated? I know he's from Texas, Carlos, 1:09:49.920 --> 1:09:53.559 because he said, y'all that's a Texas thing. Um, No, 1:09:53.720 --> 1:09:57.800 I've not. I've you know, living in California, I don't 1:09:57.840 --> 1:09:59.920 live in the hills where the fires are, so that 1:10:00.000 --> 1:10:02.240 it's never happened. I've been close to fires, I've gotten 1:10:02.880 --> 1:10:04.760 the smoke and the ash and all that. But I 1:10:04.840 --> 1:10:08.400 had to be evacuated, So that's never happened. Um, what 1:10:08.479 --> 1:10:10.600 else would you be evacuated for? Like a hurricane? No, 1:10:10.800 --> 1:10:13.080 that's never happened. Earthquakes they don't tell you, so you 1:10:13.120 --> 1:10:16.800 can't evacuate. So no, what about you guests, ever been 1:10:16.840 --> 1:10:20.000 evacuated from your home? No? The closest though, was right 1:10:20.040 --> 1:10:21.839 on part with what you were mentioning with the fires. 1:10:22.040 --> 1:10:24.599 And I think it was two thousand four, two thousand five. 1:10:24.640 --> 1:10:27.400 I was in San Diego and I lived right next 1:10:27.439 --> 1:10:31.360 to Qualcom Stadium, UH formerly the home of the Chargers, 1:10:31.560 --> 1:10:35.560 And I remember one morning, it was the day after Halloween. 1:10:35.600 --> 1:10:38.880 I woke up and the sky was just a bright 1:10:39.200 --> 1:10:42.120 orange color and it was a horrible night for me 1:10:42.160 --> 1:10:45.599 the night prior and I woke up badly hungover, days 1:10:45.640 --> 1:10:49.120 and confused from a girlfriend. And I look at my 1:10:49.240 --> 1:10:51.840 car and it was just covered, and I thought, what 1:10:51.960 --> 1:10:55.320 the fuck, why is it snowing in southern California, Because 1:10:55.560 --> 1:10:58.800 my car at that time was black. My car was 1:10:58.840 --> 1:11:01.839 covered and it was white. It was a picture perfect 1:11:02.000 --> 1:11:04.760 white color. And then I get to it, I smell it, 1:11:05.000 --> 1:11:08.920 and I touch it, and it's all ash. And so 1:11:08.960 --> 1:11:13.360 the fires that were in San Diego, we're near Script's Ranch, 1:11:13.400 --> 1:11:16.439 and that's where most of the San Diego Chargers actually live, 1:11:16.520 --> 1:11:20.040 like Thominson, Vincent Jackson, like a bunch of those guys 1:11:20.080 --> 1:11:22.599 lived in that area. But it was a pretty wealthy 1:11:22.640 --> 1:11:25.920 area as well, so a lot of those people, those 1:11:25.960 --> 1:11:28.320 people that live there had to be evacuated, and a 1:11:28.320 --> 1:11:31.479 lot of them actually centralized at Qualcom Stadium. They had 1:11:31.520 --> 1:11:34.800 first aid and paramedics and and all kinds of emergency 1:11:34.840 --> 1:11:36.760 response teams and so a couple of us. You know, 1:11:36.840 --> 1:11:38.840 we'd go down there and drop off water and some 1:11:38.920 --> 1:11:41.040 of the rations and things. Look at you, Look at 1:11:41.080 --> 1:11:43.439 you trying to get compliments for handing out water. How 1:11:43.520 --> 1:11:45.439 there you know? I mean, we were all part of 1:11:45.479 --> 1:11:49.080 it somewhere all of a sudden, No, but you know 1:11:49.439 --> 1:11:53.599 it hits you, right, I could just psyching, narcissist way went, 1:11:53.720 --> 1:11:57.360 why you were just bragging last week about goodwill and 1:11:57.520 --> 1:11:59.800 donating to a charity. Get the funk out of here 1:11:59.800 --> 1:12:02.840 with stop. I The reason I did that is because 1:12:02.880 --> 1:12:05.040 I felt like I needed to pay off. We had 1:12:05.080 --> 1:12:08.759 a contest, and I didn't say that we won the contest, 1:12:08.800 --> 1:12:11.519 so I had to say that. Well, I'm just answering 1:12:11.560 --> 1:12:13.960 a question, and I'm putting it into content should be 1:12:14.000 --> 1:12:18.160 seen but not her alright, true charity should be anonymous. Well, 1:12:18.200 --> 1:12:20.400 I wasn't tweeting it out at that time. I didn't 1:12:20.439 --> 1:12:22.240 take any selfies like look at me, I'm in the 1:12:22.240 --> 1:12:25.280 middle of a fire. Wasn't on Facebook or my Space 1:12:25.320 --> 1:12:28.160 at that time. So here I am answering a question. 1:12:28.280 --> 1:12:32.880 Why can't you accept it? Overbearingly modest David Gasca clearly? Alright, 1:12:32.880 --> 1:12:35.120 time now for study. This is it real or is 1:12:35.120 --> 1:12:37.160 it bullshit? We got some good ones this week, Yes, 1:12:37.200 --> 1:12:40.719 we do, all right, These are actual studies. New study 1:12:40.760 --> 1:12:45.200 reveals the age most people discover their favorite band their 1:12:45.280 --> 1:12:48.320 favorite band, What age do you think that is? Guest? 1:12:49.479 --> 1:12:53.280 That is correct? Muse. The results revealed that most people 1:12:53.280 --> 1:12:56.439 discover their favorite music artist at the age of thirteen. Now, 1:12:56.479 --> 1:13:00.280 this is my theory to me, the golden years of 1:13:00.479 --> 1:13:04.400 childhood are between the age of like nine or ten 1:13:05.280 --> 1:13:09.000 and thirteen, because you're not a douchebag yet, you haven't 1:13:09.040 --> 1:13:13.840 become a really horrific teenager, and you remember pretty much 1:13:13.920 --> 1:13:17.640 everything from around that age, and so anything that you 1:13:17.760 --> 1:13:20.519 experience is going to be something that the rest of 1:13:20.560 --> 1:13:23.479 your life. Every band you're going to compare to your 1:13:23.479 --> 1:13:26.880 favorite band when you were thirteen. Every in sports, like 1:13:27.000 --> 1:13:29.600 if you've become a sports fan between the ages of 1:13:29.680 --> 1:13:32.320 nine and thirteen and and then the rest of your life, 1:13:32.360 --> 1:13:34.759 the athletes are never as good as they were between 1:13:34.760 --> 1:13:36.840 the ages of nine and thirteen. The teams are never 1:13:36.880 --> 1:13:39.599 as good. Sports are never as fun because you gotta 1:13:39.600 --> 1:13:41.640 go eventually get a job, and you have life that 1:13:41.760 --> 1:13:43.320 gets in the way and all that stuff. But yeah, 1:13:43.360 --> 1:13:46.880 there's that's an amazing time. When you're a kid nine 1:13:46.920 --> 1:13:49.760 to thirteen, it's awesome and so much stuff you for 1:13:49.760 --> 1:13:51.639 the rest of your life, you're gonna judge your life 1:13:51.640 --> 1:13:53.920 compared to what happened those years. So when you grew up, 1:13:54.439 --> 1:13:57.080 what were your favorite bands at that age? You know, 1:13:57.160 --> 1:14:00.240 I was not. I was not into music very I'm 1:14:00.280 --> 1:14:02.040 more into music now than I was. Like, I was 1:14:02.080 --> 1:14:04.760 such a hard old sports guy that I wasn't really 1:14:04.760 --> 1:14:06.679 into it. I got listened to whatever my mom would 1:14:06.720 --> 1:14:08.639 listen to, you know, whatever, and that kind of stuff. 1:14:08.640 --> 1:14:10.720 But I didn't really have like a favorite band. So 1:14:10.800 --> 1:14:12.880 I'm not I'm the exception of the rule. What about 1:14:12.920 --> 1:14:19.559 you guess? So at that age I was Metallica, Pearl Jam, 1:14:19.880 --> 1:14:23.519 Sound Garden, and you can only have one, you can't 1:14:23.520 --> 1:14:25.880 have But I don't know. I just thought they were 1:14:25.920 --> 1:14:29.280 all good at that time. Yeah, I mean I wasn't. Yeah, 1:14:29.280 --> 1:14:31.400 so that you you would think that that's the golden 1:14:31.439 --> 1:14:33.920 age for you of music, right, yeah, that's you remember. 1:14:34.000 --> 1:14:36.160 But for somebody else to be like, oh that music suck, 1:14:36.240 --> 1:14:38.639 it was better, you know. When I was a kid, yeah, 1:14:38.760 --> 1:14:41.920 I was. That was a great time. Eight nine, ten 1:14:42.000 --> 1:14:47.080 years old. Dodgers Lakers, they're all winning something, and I 1:14:47.120 --> 1:14:49.200 became a Broncos fan. They were winning something. They get 1:14:49.280 --> 1:14:51.840 blown out in Super Bowls. It all came together from 1:14:51.840 --> 1:14:54.880 me during that time and it fell apart. All right, 1:14:54.920 --> 1:14:57.320 now I'm moving on. Let's see A new study finds 1:14:57.360 --> 1:15:02.000 that Americans have blank in used gift cards and credits 1:15:03.439 --> 1:15:07.400 looking for dollar amount here. Yeah, um, I don't know. 1:15:07.439 --> 1:15:11.400 I'll say like seven dollars. No, No, it's total amount, 1:15:11.640 --> 1:15:14.559 total amount for the whole country, total amount cards and 1:15:14.600 --> 1:15:16.760 credit cards. Funk, I don't know. You gotta tell me 1:15:16.800 --> 1:15:21.519 on the twenty billion dollars. Now, this has been my 1:15:21.600 --> 1:15:24.879 theory on this. The reason stores give out gift cards 1:15:25.960 --> 1:15:28.600 and uh and and encourage people around the holidays to 1:15:28.600 --> 1:15:31.920 give out gift cards is because a they know it's 1:15:31.960 --> 1:15:34.000 it's kind of like the same thing money back guarantee. 1:15:34.040 --> 1:15:36.439 Most people will never ask for the money back guarantee. 1:15:36.439 --> 1:15:38.439 Even if the products defective. They won't ask for the 1:15:38.479 --> 1:15:41.640 money back guarantee because it's uncomfortable. You have to You 1:15:41.680 --> 1:15:45.200 have to go through the phone system where go meet 1:15:45.280 --> 1:15:47.240 someone and you have to explain the situation. There's a 1:15:47.280 --> 1:15:49.280 lot of red tape. But I think the same thing 1:15:49.360 --> 1:15:52.479 applies with gift cards and credit cards. The other thing 1:15:52.520 --> 1:15:55.439 that happens is even if people use said gift cards, 1:15:55.800 --> 1:15:58.679 oftentimes they'll have a little money left over. Like there's 1:15:58.720 --> 1:16:01.679 a barbecue restaurant I go too, and I have gift 1:16:01.680 --> 1:16:05.559 cards for it I get at Costco. But I'll use 1:16:05.600 --> 1:16:07.680 it and then i won't use the full amount, and 1:16:07.720 --> 1:16:09.599 then I'll forget about it, and I will I like, 1:16:09.800 --> 1:16:11.880 I have gift cards right now that have like maybe 1:16:11.920 --> 1:16:14.160 eight bucks on it. They started out with like fifty 1:16:14.200 --> 1:16:16.800 bucks or seventy bucks, and now they're down to eight bucks, 1:16:16.840 --> 1:16:18.240 but I don't use them because they only have eight 1:16:18.280 --> 1:16:21.240 bucks there. So do you do gift certificates anymore for 1:16:21.280 --> 1:16:24.679 people or no? Well, you know sometimes listen, my wife's 1:16:24.680 --> 1:16:26.439 in charge of handing out the gifts most of the time. 1:16:26.479 --> 1:16:28.960 But I have done them. But they, by the way, 1:16:29.000 --> 1:16:35.360 they say that by generation, the millennials leave the most 1:16:35.479 --> 1:16:43.760 unused fifty gen X is at forty. So there you go. 1:16:43.880 --> 1:16:46.599 That's a a study idea. Let's see. Do you hate 1:16:46.640 --> 1:16:51.160 the sound of your own voice, guest ghunt? Now you 1:16:51.160 --> 1:16:54.479 don't hear narcissist. I don't like listen to myself. I 1:16:54.520 --> 1:16:58.599 don't either. According to a new survey, sixtent of people, 1:16:58.640 --> 1:17:02.200 though hate the sound of her own voice. I think 1:17:02.200 --> 1:17:05.080 it's higher than that. Yeah, like you probably for sure 1:17:05.120 --> 1:17:06.720 back in the day, you probably hear the sound of 1:17:06.720 --> 1:17:10.760 your voice. Yeah, I still can't, still can't stand. You're 1:17:10.760 --> 1:17:12.639 supposed to do air checks every once in a while, 1:17:12.840 --> 1:17:15.439 see how you sound. I hear every mistake and it's 1:17:15.520 --> 1:17:18.439 just so disgust No, I mean like the audible of 1:17:18.520 --> 1:17:22.280 your voice, like the sound sound think at whatever, I'm 1:17:22.280 --> 1:17:24.680 fine with this. You're much better now than you were 1:17:24.680 --> 1:17:26.080 back in the day. It sounded like back and then 1:17:26.160 --> 1:17:30.080 like someone's pinching your vocal cords. Yeah. I was a 1:17:30.160 --> 1:17:33.640 kid when I started. No, no, no, a lot of 1:17:33.640 --> 1:17:36.800 cigarettes and here I am just I've got to bacco voice. 1:17:36.880 --> 1:17:38.200 Is that what it is like back in the day, 1:17:38.240 --> 1:17:40.240 guys with smoke and then drink some whiskey and the 1:17:40.240 --> 1:17:43.759 broadcast booth. Oh totally, man, guys, dude. When I first 1:17:43.760 --> 1:17:46.880 got into the business, there were guys that were chained smoke. 1:17:46.920 --> 1:17:50.280 We used to have an update guy Fox that would 1:17:50.320 --> 1:17:53.280 go out and chain smoke in between his every twenty 1:17:53.280 --> 1:17:56.519 minute update thing. It was insane. That's unbelievable. You guys 1:17:56.520 --> 1:18:01.200 like asking for he was like a walking ashtray and craziness. Anyway, 1:18:01.240 --> 1:18:03.880 All right, let's see here. How about this story. There's 1:18:03.960 --> 1:18:07.479 a study out of the New York area there that 1:18:07.960 --> 1:18:12.200 because New Jersey has sports gambling, yes, they realized that 1:18:13.160 --> 1:18:16.599 the state of New Jersey is collected eight hundred thirty 1:18:16.680 --> 1:18:21.120 seven million dollars from mobile sports gamblers who live in 1:18:21.160 --> 1:18:25.720 New New York. About that. Did you wager on the 1:18:25.720 --> 1:18:29.479 Super Bowl at all? Uh? Yeah, I want I had 1:18:29.560 --> 1:18:34.880 Kansas City on that. So yeah, I'm grateful. I'm grateful today, 1:18:34.880 --> 1:18:38.360 and I really love San Francisco in that game. I'm 1:18:38.360 --> 1:18:40.719 grateful that I was not able to go to Vegas 1:18:40.800 --> 1:18:43.360 or anywhere else too. I heard a rumor that California 1:18:43.439 --> 1:18:49.800 is gonna have legalized sports gambling next year. I believe one. Supposedly. 1:18:50.640 --> 1:18:53.439 I'll believe it when it happened, I hope. So. A 1:18:53.520 --> 1:18:57.720 new survey by a bank shows that a third of 1:18:57.760 --> 1:19:03.960 Americans say gosh is their fa favorite way to pay um. Well, yeah, 1:19:04.160 --> 1:19:06.639 well a lot of these stories are going cashless. Yeah, 1:19:06.800 --> 1:19:09.960 I think that's bullshit. There's just a matter of convenience 1:19:09.960 --> 1:19:13.040 to I don't know about you, but the banks that 1:19:13.080 --> 1:19:18.080 I bank with allow me to access cash from tellers, 1:19:18.080 --> 1:19:20.719 like at a seven eleven, so there's no service fee attached. 1:19:21.080 --> 1:19:24.120 Oh that's nice than these four dollar service fee. Yeah. 1:19:24.160 --> 1:19:26.759 Like in Vegas, if you're in a casino, god forbid, 1:19:26.760 --> 1:19:29.040 you need extra cash, it's like four or five dollars 1:19:29.400 --> 1:19:32.880 per transaction withdraw some money. Oh it's a scam. Man. 1:19:33.320 --> 1:19:35.599 Better off leaving the casino and going to a bank 1:19:36.280 --> 1:19:38.000 is what you're better off? Or if you go to 1:19:38.040 --> 1:19:40.960 an arco, an arco, even if the gas is cheaper 1:19:41.000 --> 1:19:43.559 and you use your card, will charge you like thirty 1:19:43.600 --> 1:19:48.800 five or fifty cents for the transaction, which is bullshit too. Yeah, 1:19:48.800 --> 1:19:51.040 I know you don't go all right, here we go? 1:19:51.160 --> 1:19:55.080 This is uh. A large survey of one point two 1:19:55.080 --> 1:19:59.799 million Americans, researchers from Yale and Oxford Universities have shown 1:19:59.800 --> 1:20:04.439 that people who exercise are markedly happier than people who don't, 1:20:04.880 --> 1:20:06.479 even if they have listening to and I think this 1:20:06.520 --> 1:20:09.120 is bullshit. Now I don't. We can compare each other. Ah, 1:20:09.439 --> 1:20:11.960 I was morbidly OBEs. I never went to The only 1:20:12.040 --> 1:20:13.479 gym I had in my life was I had a 1:20:13.520 --> 1:20:15.280 friend named Jim. That's it. I didn't go to the 1:20:15.320 --> 1:20:18.120 gym at all, didn't work out for many, many years. 1:20:18.160 --> 1:20:22.280 I just ate terribly. I was happy, like I'm happy. 1:20:22.360 --> 1:20:25.519 I'm relatively happy now, but I'm not any more happy. 1:20:25.520 --> 1:20:27.240 And I go to the gym five days a week. 1:20:27.240 --> 1:20:30.400 But I'm not any happier now than I was when 1:20:30.479 --> 1:20:34.280 I was morbidly obese, sitting on my sofa eating Cheetos 1:20:34.280 --> 1:20:38.559 and candy bars. I I have to disagree, Like your stewarts, 1:20:38.600 --> 1:20:41.599 my experience is, I'm telling you my life experience. Well, 1:20:41.640 --> 1:20:44.519 you seem a lot more pleasant now than you did 1:20:44.600 --> 1:20:47.559 back in the day when I was at my peak 1:20:48.120 --> 1:20:51.280 peak eating, I was Joey Chestnut. You didn't know me that, Yeah, 1:20:51.280 --> 1:20:52.880 but I knew you when you were taking what your 1:20:52.960 --> 1:20:55.920 thousand steps per night during the show everything. When I 1:20:55.960 --> 1:20:58.240 used to walk around the b in the building. You're 1:20:58.240 --> 1:21:01.280 a lot more homeless people around the studios. Yeah, you're 1:21:01.280 --> 1:21:03.479 a lot more pleasant now than you were before. Probably 1:21:03.479 --> 1:21:06.080 that's probably because, like I'm I'm working with you and 1:21:06.120 --> 1:21:09.599 I've added some life into your career. And uh, that's 1:21:09.600 --> 1:21:12.719 a lie, I don't know. Yeah, don't you feel better 1:21:12.880 --> 1:21:14.960 when you put on clothes now that you're not having 1:21:15.000 --> 1:21:17.680 a labor to putting things on, to button them up, 1:21:17.800 --> 1:21:21.680 or you feel like now they're too big, and so 1:21:21.800 --> 1:21:24.479 now I still look like I look like a loser. 1:21:24.520 --> 1:21:27.680 I'm disheveled, I'm raggedy, and over here it's a it's 1:21:27.680 --> 1:21:32.120 a mess. There's something great about working off your obesity, 1:21:32.200 --> 1:21:35.000 is there not? No, it does feel good when you 1:21:35.000 --> 1:21:37.360 put clothes on that didn't fit and now they fit. 1:21:37.880 --> 1:21:39.840 That I mean that does you. You do get a 1:21:39.880 --> 1:21:43.880 sense of accomplishment. But it's still it bothers me because 1:21:43.920 --> 1:21:45.240 I'm cheap and I don't want to have to buy 1:21:45.280 --> 1:21:48.280 new clothes. Maybe I should gain a few pounds back, 1:21:48.360 --> 1:21:50.479 get a couple of extra cheeseburgers, and then the clothes 1:21:50.520 --> 1:21:52.040 will fit perfectly, and then I don't have to buy 1:21:52.080 --> 1:21:54.240 new clothes. You know, It's like that does go through 1:21:54.280 --> 1:21:57.880 my head from from time to time. All right, let's 1:21:57.880 --> 1:21:59.720 do a couple more here. What do we have? A 1:21:59.840 --> 1:22:03.720 new WHO survey finds that nearly a quarter of Americans 1:22:04.320 --> 1:22:07.840 say that working on Monday is more dreadful than the 1:22:07.960 --> 1:22:11.320 d m V or the dentist. You agree with that, 1:22:11.439 --> 1:22:14.840 I don't believe that. I believe it. I'll tell you why. 1:22:14.880 --> 1:22:17.840 Now we have a pretty good job and it's it's fun. 1:22:17.880 --> 1:22:19.920 I look forward to going back to work, and I 1:22:19.960 --> 1:22:22.559 always excited on the weekends because I come in Sunday night. 1:22:22.560 --> 1:22:24.679 In the Monday, there's always a lot of stuff. There's 1:22:24.720 --> 1:22:27.000 like a couple of days that I can can dissect 1:22:27.080 --> 1:22:28.880 and find stuff to talk about. So I always look 1:22:28.920 --> 1:22:33.040 forward to that. Um. But I get it. I understand 1:22:33.080 --> 1:22:35.559 why if you have a job that you you hate, 1:22:35.560 --> 1:22:37.320 that you despise, or like, I don't want to go 1:22:37.400 --> 1:22:39.840 back there. I don't want to deal with Everyone's in 1:22:39.880 --> 1:22:42.759 a bad mood. Everyone's a sour puss, everyone's kyrie irving 1:22:42.800 --> 1:22:44.240 on Monday. You know who wants to deal with that? 1:22:45.280 --> 1:22:49.920 So I think that's right. I agree for most people 1:22:49.960 --> 1:22:52.280 that have jobs they don't like. Why would you be 1:22:52.320 --> 1:22:55.439 excited about? But how would that be any different from 1:22:55.439 --> 1:23:00.400 a Tuesday or a Wednesday, or a Thursday or Friday. Well, 1:23:00.479 --> 1:23:03.479 because when you get further in the week, you feel 1:23:03.520 --> 1:23:06.559 like you're closer to another weekend, you know what I'm saying, Like, 1:23:06.760 --> 1:23:09.040 you know Wednesdays, I get through Wednesday at Thursday. Maybe 1:23:09.040 --> 1:23:11.120 I'll take Friday off and then the weekends too. I 1:23:11.160 --> 1:23:13.680 don't know. There's people that work. I work on the weekends, 1:23:13.680 --> 1:23:16.840 and that sucks working on the weekends. You know, come, 1:23:16.880 --> 1:23:19.280 I get take a number. I worked, and I worked 1:23:19.320 --> 1:23:22.240 ten years. Actually more than that. I worked weekend overnights 1:23:22.320 --> 1:23:26.080 for years, and I could not date anyone. No one 1:23:26.120 --> 1:23:28.639 would be around me. I stopped getting invited to parties 1:23:28.920 --> 1:23:32.000 and and all that. But I didn't mind it. Actually, 1:23:32.040 --> 1:23:34.920 I liked working weekends because I got all this free 1:23:34.960 --> 1:23:37.000 times during the week. It was kind of cool. Yeah, 1:23:37.200 --> 1:23:38.920 I mean it's a give and take. But like you said, 1:23:38.920 --> 1:23:42.240 you couldn't socialize and mingle and go out. But I 1:23:42.240 --> 1:23:45.960 don't like socializing them. Yeah, I'm okay with it. I'm 1:23:45.960 --> 1:23:48.640 perfectly l a. D m v s are absolutely horrendous. 1:23:48.680 --> 1:23:51.120 So that's why I go out to that. You've got 1:23:51.200 --> 1:23:52.800 to go out to the sticks is what you gotta do. 1:23:52.880 --> 1:23:55.400 You gotta get a reservation. It's exactly what you don't do. 1:23:55.560 --> 1:23:58.080 And when I do that. Now, have I learned My 1:23:58.080 --> 1:24:00.760 wife knows how to play the game. Oh boy, she does. 1:24:01.520 --> 1:24:05.240 How often do you wash your bath towels? A new 1:24:05.360 --> 1:24:11.960 survey says it's every blank days, every five days, No, 1:24:12.160 --> 1:24:16.240 every three days. People, I'm a once a week. Guy, 1:24:16.520 --> 1:24:19.920 I have a rotation. I have two bath towels. You 1:24:19.960 --> 1:24:22.960 have two towels, Well, yeah, I rotate them. One's the 1:24:23.000 --> 1:24:25.960 towel I used for Monday and Wednesday, and the other 1:24:26.200 --> 1:24:31.360 is like is Tuesday Thursday. You don't wash your towels 1:24:31.400 --> 1:24:34.840 every day now after usage? No, I'm I'm worried about 1:24:34.880 --> 1:24:41.000 the environment. This global warming, your climate changer. Ye, climate change. 1:24:41.479 --> 1:24:45.640 You are really fucking cheap. All right. Here's another one. 1:24:45.680 --> 1:24:48.679 More than a hundred million Americans are eligible to vote 1:24:48.680 --> 1:24:52.479 but do not actually vote. So explain that. Guess why 1:24:52.479 --> 1:24:56.360 would a hundred million people be eligible to vote and say, ah, 1:24:56.520 --> 1:25:02.679 fuck it, I'm not gonna vote. Um because they're too lazy. Yeah, 1:25:02.720 --> 1:25:04.320 I don't. I don't have the answer that I'm just 1:25:04.400 --> 1:25:06.000 you know, they just know I'm just asking the question 1:25:06.200 --> 1:25:08.479 because they feel like their vote won't count anyway. Like 1:25:08.479 --> 1:25:12.360 here in California, if you're a Republican, your vote really 1:25:12.400 --> 1:25:16.160 doesn't matter. If you're in New York, your Republican doesn't 1:25:16.160 --> 1:25:18.240 really matter. Yeah, I mean if you're in a battleground 1:25:18.320 --> 1:25:22.080 state like Michigan, and then it really matters because it 1:25:22.120 --> 1:25:25.320 could flip. Um. But I think it's also some people 1:25:25.360 --> 1:25:28.479 are are We're worried about the deep state and people 1:25:28.520 --> 1:25:31.320 getting their information, and they don't want to deal with it, 1:25:31.400 --> 1:25:33.479 and they figured like they just stay out of the system. 1:25:33.880 --> 1:25:35.519 I think there's a lot of those people. If it's 1:25:35.560 --> 1:25:37.599 the same people that also give their blood to look 1:25:37.680 --> 1:25:40.640 up their heritage to like you, I don't I'm not, 1:25:40.760 --> 1:25:43.760 I don't care. I listen. I'll be dead before you know. 1:25:43.840 --> 1:25:46.559 It's so who cares? You know, have at it your 1:25:46.600 --> 1:25:50.680 years now, it won't matter. That's true anyway. Uh did 1:25:50.720 --> 1:25:53.320 you vote when you were eighteen? Did you vote? Like 1:25:53.360 --> 1:25:56.080 when you became eligible to vote, did you start voting? Oh? Yeah, 1:25:56.120 --> 1:25:58.000 I mean my I grew up you know why, I 1:25:58.120 --> 1:26:00.360 my fun memories. You know, I'm so I us, I'm 1:26:00.360 --> 1:26:02.599 so old now that my parents my mom was more 1:26:02.640 --> 1:26:05.200 of like a Democrat, my dad more of a Republican, 1:26:05.240 --> 1:26:09.160 and so they would fight at dinner done about politics, right, 1:26:09.880 --> 1:26:12.880 And so I grew up with this as in my childhood. 1:26:12.920 --> 1:26:15.360 And but the funny thing is that they didn't like 1:26:15.479 --> 1:26:19.320 not talk to each other because they disagreed about politics. Today, 1:26:19.840 --> 1:26:21.599 you can't even be in the same room with someone 1:26:21.640 --> 1:26:24.680 who's in the other party. And people are people have 1:26:24.680 --> 1:26:27.559 have regressed so much. But so, yeah, when in my house, 1:26:27.600 --> 1:26:31.160 it was like a big deal, and both my parents 1:26:31.200 --> 1:26:34.120 tried to get me to vote for their party. When 1:26:34.120 --> 1:26:35.880 you're eighteen, your dumby, you don't know what that was 1:26:35.920 --> 1:26:38.840 going on, right, Yeah, My So my grandmother on my 1:26:38.960 --> 1:26:45.960 mom's side, uh, she was from Boston, and uh my 1:26:46.080 --> 1:26:48.599 grandfather was a police officer. He was also in the 1:26:48.840 --> 1:26:51.640 in the military too. But back in the day, I 1:26:51.680 --> 1:26:54.360 remember it because there'd be news talk shows on or 1:26:54.360 --> 1:26:58.559 the radio was on, like Paul Harvey of course, and whenever, yeah, 1:26:58.600 --> 1:27:01.200 whenever we'd go over there, my dad was with us. 1:27:01.240 --> 1:27:05.600 It was always like that political law enforcement conversation, and 1:27:05.640 --> 1:27:09.160 my grandmother would be peppering my dad or my grandfather 1:27:09.360 --> 1:27:13.040 questions and and obviously conversing. But they talked about those 1:27:13.040 --> 1:27:15.040 things back in the day, and you just you're none 1:27:15.040 --> 1:27:17.800 of the wiser until obviously you start paying attention more 1:27:17.880 --> 1:27:20.640 to it. But well, I remember too, like my we 1:27:20.640 --> 1:27:23.720 would watch like sixty Minutes, which was, you know, still on, 1:27:23.920 --> 1:27:28.120 and I remember my mom actually wrote a letter. Back 1:27:28.120 --> 1:27:30.519 in those days you had write letters, and they read 1:27:30.560 --> 1:27:32.439 it at the end of sixty minutes when they had 1:27:32.439 --> 1:27:35.640 Andy Rooney. But they had a letter segment and and 1:27:35.680 --> 1:27:38.880 they read my mom's letter on sixty minutes. I forget 1:27:38.920 --> 1:27:40.240 what it was about, but it was like a big 1:27:40.240 --> 1:27:41.559 deal in the house, you know. It was like a 1:27:41.600 --> 1:27:44.559 big deal. And my mom's letter was read on sixty minutes. 1:27:44.640 --> 1:27:47.960 I was like, wow, you know that's pretty good. Yeah, uh, 1:27:48.080 --> 1:27:49.639 don't six of sports. Well, I got a few minutes 1:27:49.720 --> 1:27:51.400 left her guest scouts. So anything you want to work 1:27:51.439 --> 1:27:54.640 in here? Yeah, this was the favorite one that I 1:27:55.040 --> 1:27:57.040 know jumped out to you. And since we were talking 1:27:57.040 --> 1:28:02.120 earlier about my car and and me being a physical specimen, 1:28:02.439 --> 1:28:06.120 how about this a test of vehicle has been tricked 1:28:06.120 --> 1:28:09.720 now to accelerating to a speed limit that as a 1:28:09.760 --> 1:28:14.680 little alarming um on your computers at least back in 1:28:14.680 --> 1:28:18.040 the day. Uh, did you have any security on your 1:28:18.040 --> 1:28:22.439 computers or would you download the security software? Oh? Yeah, yeah, 1:28:22.439 --> 1:28:25.280 I would download You talk about that virus stuff to 1:28:25.360 --> 1:28:29.719 protect from viruses? Yeah? Yeah that So a research company 1:28:29.960 --> 1:28:32.200 at one of these industry has actually placed two inch 1:28:32.280 --> 1:28:37.040 long pieces of electrical tape horizontally across the three on 1:28:37.080 --> 1:28:41.400 a thirty five speed limit sign and it caused the 1:28:41.560 --> 1:28:45.519 tests of cars that have cameras attached to them to 1:28:45.600 --> 1:28:50.479 actually misread the print on the speed limit sign, so 1:28:50.520 --> 1:28:53.320 they would actually accelerate from thirty five miles per hour 1:28:53.479 --> 1:29:00.640 to eighty five miles per hour. Wow, that's that's uh, 1:29:00.920 --> 1:29:03.920 that's scary, man. And how do they Did anybody get 1:29:03.960 --> 1:29:06.680 in an accident doing this? Or there was there was 1:29:06.720 --> 1:29:10.360 a controlled situation. No, it wasn't control, but there were complaints. 1:29:10.439 --> 1:29:12.559 There was a there's a grand total of a hundred 1:29:12.640 --> 1:29:16.120 twenty seven complaints. They actually were sent to the National 1:29:16.200 --> 1:29:20.040 Highway Safety Administration claiming that some of the models were 1:29:20.080 --> 1:29:24.600 accelerating decelerating at certain spots and that was because the 1:29:24.600 --> 1:29:28.400 the speed limit signs that were posted and so um, 1:29:28.439 --> 1:29:31.000 it's caused at a grand total of a hundred and 1:29:31.040 --> 1:29:35.400 ten crashes so far since those incidents have been reported. 1:29:35.439 --> 1:29:37.680 But can you imagine that you're driving through like oh, 1:29:37.720 --> 1:29:41.320 I know speed a speed limit through a school zones 1:29:41.360 --> 1:29:43.680 twenty five, but you're in a residential area I think 1:29:43.680 --> 1:29:46.760 it's twenty five or thirty. Yeah, you do something like 1:29:46.800 --> 1:29:48.559 that and you're part of town in Malibu, then your 1:29:48.600 --> 1:29:51.200 your game over, especially around like l A where you know, 1:29:51.320 --> 1:29:55.560 now the status symbol is the Tesla. It used to 1:29:55.600 --> 1:29:59.679 be the BMW or the Mercedes or the Escalade eighties. Now, 1:30:00.920 --> 1:30:04.479 all about that Tesla. That's a sign of wealth in 1:30:04.600 --> 1:30:07.960 Los Angeles. How about this? Uh, I had a traumatic 1:30:08.040 --> 1:30:10.479 experience at your Christmas party, but this is actually a 1:30:10.479 --> 1:30:13.200 good one, picking up on all the women that are there. 1:30:13.560 --> 1:30:17.080 A Kentucky man was arrested last weekend after thorities say 1:30:17.120 --> 1:30:21.120 he attempted to rob a restaurant. Benno was a Raising 1:30:21.200 --> 1:30:24.080 Cane's restaurant when he tried to rob it, And there 1:30:24.120 --> 1:30:27.479 was an office that should be capital murder if you 1:30:27.600 --> 1:30:30.719 try to jack a raising Cane chickens through your chicken tracks. 1:30:31.800 --> 1:30:34.639 Could you imagine trying to rob something and there's an 1:30:34.640 --> 1:30:37.400 off duty police officer just hanging out in the middle 1:30:37.400 --> 1:30:40.479 of the night in that same location. It happened at 1:30:40.479 --> 1:30:45.320 ten o'clock at night in Louisville, Kentucky. Um. He obviously 1:30:45.360 --> 1:30:49.840 went to the register, demanded some cash, shut off his gun. Uh. 1:30:49.880 --> 1:30:52.360 And that's when a couple off duty police officers are 1:30:52.400 --> 1:30:56.559 actually inside um and obviously arrested him and popped him. 1:30:56.600 --> 1:30:59.200 So that's pretty good. Yeah, yeah, you gotta be care 1:30:59.680 --> 1:31:01.880 you know, you think like well, there's no police around, 1:31:01.920 --> 1:31:03.960 but sometimes the police when they're off work still I 1:31:04.200 --> 1:31:06.479 still got guns with them, and I never know. That's 1:31:06.479 --> 1:31:08.479 why you shouldn't do this kind of stupid stuff, because 1:31:08.520 --> 1:31:10.599 you never know there might be just some random off 1:31:10.680 --> 1:31:12.800 duty cop that's got that got their gun with him, 1:31:12.840 --> 1:31:15.080 and ord somebody that has a gun who's not a copy. 1:31:15.160 --> 1:31:17.040 That way, it's a bad situation. Have you ever had 1:31:17.080 --> 1:31:20.439 a gun flashed at you? No, I've not. I've not 1:31:20.560 --> 1:31:23.479 to know had that. No, you want to flash a 1:31:23.479 --> 1:31:27.640 gun at me now you No? No, I'm always just curious. Um, 1:31:27.680 --> 1:31:31.920 how about this? UM? Kenton County, Kentucky, So we're stay 1:31:31.960 --> 1:31:36.600 in Kentucky. UM. A district judge has actually ordered the 1:31:36.720 --> 1:31:42.519 Kentucky Transportation Cabinet to pay a man attorney fees uh 1:31:42.600 --> 1:31:45.800 and more in a hundred and fifty thousand dollars worth 1:31:45.800 --> 1:31:49.719 the litigation costs because he was denied a personal license 1:31:49.800 --> 1:31:54.080 plate that said I'm god, you know I I saw 1:31:54.160 --> 1:31:57.559 this story and now but this is just he's not 1:31:57.600 --> 1:32:00.240 getting the money. Rs. It's attorney feast. But yeah, so 1:32:00.320 --> 1:32:03.160 it's really just it would be better if he was 1:32:03.200 --> 1:32:06.920 getting the money. Unfortunately, he's just paying the attorneys. Yet again, 1:32:06.960 --> 1:32:10.799 who wins a lawsuit? It's always the attorneys. It's always 1:32:10.840 --> 1:32:13.719 the attorneys. They're the ones that win. And you should 1:32:13.800 --> 1:32:16.240 never call an attorney and ask if you have a case. 1:32:16.320 --> 1:32:19.719 You know why, They're gonna say yes, because they get paid. 1:32:19.800 --> 1:32:22.920 Even if you don't have a case, they're gonna get paid. Right, 1:32:23.439 --> 1:32:25.479 It's pretty damn good though. That's their ace in the 1:32:25.520 --> 1:32:29.760 hole right there. Could but could you imagine having a 1:32:29.800 --> 1:32:32.560 license plate and says I'm got on it, especially on 1:32:32.600 --> 1:32:37.280 your horrid car? What my car? Leave my car out 1:32:37.320 --> 1:32:38.920 of this. I know you're jealous in my car. I 1:32:38.920 --> 1:32:44.759 think it's kind of ugly. Steve Harvey, America's entertainer Steve 1:32:44.800 --> 1:32:48.719 Harvey walked by my car told his his security guard 1:32:48.920 --> 1:32:51.519 that I liked the color of that car. How about 1:32:51.560 --> 1:32:55.160 this here in Los Angeles? Um one of nine people 1:32:56.520 --> 1:33:00.439 charge in l A were pot for voter fraud scheme. 1:33:01.120 --> 1:33:05.519 That was not amongst the dead ben But they are 1:33:05.560 --> 1:33:09.920 actually throughout skid row. So there's different spots here in 1:33:10.120 --> 1:33:15.240 l A, like downtown Los Angeles, near Dodger Stadium, near Hollywood, 1:33:15.280 --> 1:33:18.920 near the Hollywood Bowl. They would consider so many spots 1:33:18.960 --> 1:33:23.360 obviously dangerous but skid row. This man pleaded guilty and 1:33:23.439 --> 1:33:27.200 was sentenced to a year in county jail. Um homeless 1:33:27.200 --> 1:33:32.680 people were given cash and cigarettes exchange for fraudulent signatures 1:33:32.720 --> 1:33:38.280 on ballot initiative petitions and voter registration forms just last year. 1:33:38.680 --> 1:33:41.400 Isn't that how they do it in Chicago where they 1:33:41.400 --> 1:33:43.280 have the dead people voting. I guess in l A 1:33:43.320 --> 1:33:45.840 we get the homeless people. I guess some of them 1:33:45.840 --> 1:33:48.040 are eligible to vote though, Right, but you don't have 1:33:48.080 --> 1:33:52.080 an address, have an address to vote? No, don't, well, 1:33:52.520 --> 1:33:54.920 you don't have a driver's life send Where do they 1:33:54.960 --> 1:33:57.439 send the ballot? I don't know if a peel box? 1:33:57.439 --> 1:33:59.559 I would imagine, right. Do you think the home less 1:33:59.560 --> 1:34:02.160 have peo box? No? No, I'm saying that someone's fraudulently 1:34:02.240 --> 1:34:04.880 setting this up, and they probably put some kind of 1:34:05.200 --> 1:34:08.960 peeo box that would be on there. Yeah, I don't know. 1:34:09.000 --> 1:34:10.720 All right, let's put the baby to bed, guest gun 1:34:10.760 --> 1:34:12.920 all right, if you want, that's fine. I know you 1:34:12.960 --> 1:34:15.680 showed up late. I didn't show up late. You did 1:34:15.680 --> 1:34:18.160 showed up. You showed up late. You were fifteen twenty 1:34:18.200 --> 1:34:20.000 minutes later. I have to drive far to get to 1:34:20.040 --> 1:34:21.680 where I work I don't have to roll out. I 1:34:21.720 --> 1:34:23.120 don't get to roll out of bed like you do. 1:34:23.200 --> 1:34:25.240 Hold on, let me get my little violin out here. 1:34:25.640 --> 1:34:28.120 We'll play my little violin the world's smallest violin. I 1:34:28.160 --> 1:34:31.080 haven't just for this because you are the Hindenburg. That's 1:34:31.080 --> 1:34:32.880 what you are. That's your nickname. The new nickname is 1:34:32.920 --> 1:34:37.120 the Hindenburg. Wow. Yeah, I could have gone Mount St. Helen's. 1:34:37.160 --> 1:34:40.200 I could have gone Titanic or something like that, you know. Yeah, 1:34:40.280 --> 1:34:44.040 you could have the Challenger, Yeah, Exxon Valds. I think 1:34:44.080 --> 1:34:49.760 I used that one earlier. What else? What the Chernobyl's one? Right? Yeah? 1:34:49.920 --> 1:34:51.679 It could have been a race car driver in Lamon's. 1:34:51.720 --> 1:34:54.040 I don't know, it could have been uh was that 1:34:55.120 --> 1:34:58.640 loose tons, right or whatever it's called? Second? Remember that? Yeah? 1:34:58.680 --> 1:35:01.960 That's yeah. Please can we stop with all this death talk? 1:35:02.040 --> 1:35:04.800 And I mean, listen, have a great weekend, enjoy the 1:35:04.920 --> 1:35:08.920 XFL this weekend and the Astros scandal. Will have the 1:35:09.040 --> 1:35:13.320 latest developments on that, and enjoy yourself. Hey, and to 1:35:13.400 --> 1:35:17.000 follow me on Instagram. Ben Mallard on Fox. I'm trying 1:35:17.000 --> 1:35:20.000 to get my followers up close to a thousand right now, 1:35:20.040 --> 1:35:21.960 so I need to get a few more this weekend 1:35:22.080 --> 1:35:24.160 and that would help out. And I'm planning on having 1:35:24.200 --> 1:35:28.559 another Mallard food review on Instagram this weekend, so it's 1:35:28.720 --> 1:35:30.680 very exciting. Yeah, to make sure you follow me on 1:35:30.720 --> 1:35:35.080 Instagram to Dave Gascon is the I G handle. I 1:35:35.080 --> 1:35:39.040 have plenty of glamour shots on their um exercise nutrition 1:35:39.080 --> 1:35:42.639 tips on their UM go try cooking for Ben every 1:35:42.640 --> 1:35:46.920 once in a while with green, healthy, nutritious food. I 1:35:46.960 --> 1:35:49.680 gotta go. All right, you have a great weekend. Uh. 1:35:49.800 --> 1:35:54.720 Aloha means goodbye, Sayanara of even their child by by 1:35:54.920 --> 1:35:55.320 car