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Speaker 1: Are you leave in I you wanna way back home?

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Speaker 2: Either way, we want to be there.

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Speaker 1: Doesn't matter how much baggage you claim and.

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Speaker 3: Give us time and a Turmano and gage. We want

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Speaker 3: to send you off inside. We wanna welcome you back home.

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Speaker 2: Tell us all about every scared he was? It fine, Malborn.

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Speaker 1: Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 2: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 2: Do you need to ride?

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Speaker 1: Do your need ride?

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Speaker 5: Ride?

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Speaker 3: Do you need.

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Speaker 6: With Karen and Chris?

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Speaker 4: Okay from the Taco Bell on Century Boulevard near La X.

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Speaker 6: This is do you need a ride? I'm Chris Fairbanks.

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Speaker 2: I'm Karen Kilgariff.

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Speaker 6: We are headed to the Lax.

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Speaker 2: To pick up America's Twitter sweetheart, Rob Delaney, who has

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Speaker 2: been in I believe Philadelphia for a little while doing comedy.

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Speaker 4: That's where his flight is from. I don't know what

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Speaker 4: his business was there.

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Speaker 2: You're saying he could have gotten a rental car in

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Speaker 2: Philadelphia and driven out to an outlying area.

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Speaker 4: I'm saying he's a drug dealer and he had shady

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Speaker 4: business in the Philly area.

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Speaker 2: You're saying that he had one of those old fashioned

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Speaker 2: stamsnight suitcases, but actually, when you scratch the surface, it

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Speaker 2: was all just cocaine. It was all coke painted cocaine.

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Speaker 4: We thought it was coke, but it was actually putty.

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Speaker 4: He's filling in the crack on that bell.

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Speaker 2: He's an amazing artist and sculptor, and we are honored

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Speaker 2: to have him on our podcast, the podcast that we

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Speaker 2: finally have a guest for. I mean I shouldn't say finally,

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Speaker 2: but we've talked about this a little bit. You and

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Speaker 2: I have been talking about doing this podcast for over

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Speaker 2: eighteen years.

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Speaker 4: Yeah.

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Speaker 6: We started at our eighth grade graduation.

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Speaker 4: I remember we were going to do a podcast about

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Speaker 4: feathered hair and suspenders.

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Speaker 2: And goodie combs. Yeah, and he said, let's hold on this, and.

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Speaker 4: It was going to be called Peachy King after the folders,

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Speaker 4: but those hadn't quite caught on yet, so it wasn't

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Speaker 4: no good. It wasn't a good idea. We weren't ready.

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Speaker 2: And we've been doing that kind of ruminating on ideas,

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Speaker 2: talking things through, really letting it sit in simmer.

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Speaker 4: We went through college, we've been and out of relationships,

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Speaker 4: we've become adults.

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Speaker 2: I was hospitalized a couple times. We've really been through it.

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Speaker 4: I yeah, I went. You were in and out of

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Speaker 4: the hospital off and on for a full decade.

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Speaker 2: I love the hospital. I was a candy striper once

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Speaker 2: uh and then once uh. Of course criminal illness.

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Speaker 4: Oh yeah no.

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Speaker 2: I would hang out on the terminal illness ward just

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Speaker 2: to stay stay present.

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Speaker 4: It's just your tapioca addiction.

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Speaker 2: I love drinking out of a big picture with a straw.

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Speaker 4: And I like craftmatic adjustable beds.

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Speaker 2: And I like loud TVs. So it's our common interest

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Speaker 2: that bring us here.

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Speaker 4: I love the smell of sad decaying grandparents.

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Speaker 2: Oh what a true and accurate smell. That is what

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Speaker 2: a real picture you just painted?

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, one that smell that can bring the opposite

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Speaker 4: feeling of comedy to everyone.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, let's start every podcast talking about kind of like

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Speaker 2: decaying grandparents.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, about human loss.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, the people that were kind of probably the nicest

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Speaker 2: to you in your whole life, losing those people and

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Speaker 2: the way it smelled.

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Speaker 4: We're near the Sharonan Gateway at Abon Drive. I just

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Speaker 4: want to get sponsors for the podcast. Good, So I'm

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Speaker 4: gonna mention one of them is going to take off.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it could be the brasserie at the shirt and gateway.

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Speaker 2: What if they gave us an individual. We did commercials

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Speaker 2: for the Brasserie.

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Speaker 4: That, of course, is a retisserie based underwear store.

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Speaker 2: They cut off slices of bras for you for everyone

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Speaker 2: at your tea.

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Speaker 4: Buy it one cup at a time, like a breast,

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Speaker 4: and put them on your breast.

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Speaker 2: One cup of time. That's what I put my bra on,

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Speaker 2: one cup of time every day, like any normal person.

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Speaker 4: You put your bra on like you put on your coffee.

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Speaker 2: One cup of time. Don't rush it. Oh, there's the cops.

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Speaker 2: You have to get all the way over.

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Speaker 4: Well, I have a mustache, so we don't have to

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Speaker 4: worry about them. They will just knowingly nod at me.

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Speaker 4: Thank you.

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Speaker 2: Sorry, I'm a terrible front seat driver bike, No I

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Speaker 2: need you.

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Speaker 4: It's funny. We've done this once before. That's what we

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Speaker 4: were getting at before for our introductory episode. This is

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Speaker 4: our first legitimate episode with a guest who will be

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Speaker 4: Rob Delaney. We've already said that anyway, it is difficult

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Speaker 4: for me to multitask and talk and drive.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, podcasting and driving is I think we're breaking new

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Speaker 2: ground here. When I first moved to La As, everyone

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Speaker 2: knows Elie's very spread out. It's a big, huge city.

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Speaker 2: Everyone have acar. Everyone knows it's common common knowledge.

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Speaker 4: Zero public transit. Yeah you're on your owner of a subway,

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Speaker 4: but it doesn't exist.

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Speaker 2: No one's seen it. Nope. I loved getting picked up

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Speaker 2: from the airport, getting dropped off and doing the same

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Speaker 2: for my friends. It was really because it's such a

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Speaker 2: pain in the ass. It really is an extension of

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Speaker 2: your You're really reaching out and saying I care about you,

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Speaker 2: I care about how you feel when you leave this place,

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Speaker 2: and I want you to come back.

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Speaker 4: Sure.

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Speaker 2: So I kind of love being at the airport, and

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Speaker 2: I love doing this.

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Speaker 4: I do too. It's a lot of people give feelings

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Speaker 4: of anguish or despair when they're at the airport, but

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Speaker 4: I no way that is me. That is what I get.

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Speaker 4: I forgot. That is I'm describing the way I feel

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Speaker 4: right now.

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Speaker 2: Are you a Victorian spinster? Because that those are big

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Speaker 2: feelings for the airport.

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Speaker 6: I it's not the airport itself.

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Speaker 4: It's just I hate the impending feeling that I'm about

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Speaker 4: to see a new place.

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Speaker 2: Yes, true, Well, yeah, there's so much anxiety.

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Speaker 4: It's other people, different.

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Speaker 2: Strangeness, question marks. What's gonna happen not.

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Speaker 4: Knowing the road system in another city. Yeah, even though

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Speaker 4: I'm never driving, and.

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Speaker 2: Also being tired or anticipating being tired. What's he on

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Speaker 2: US air? He is on US air But but they

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Speaker 2: canceled that airline.

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Speaker 4: You know what, it's funny. He's not arriving for another

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Speaker 4: fifteen minutes. Oh did we time things poorly?

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Speaker 2: Well, I mean that's the airport baby, That's how it is.

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Speaker 4: No, there's the airport baby.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god. The airport has a baby mask so much.

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Speaker 2: You can pick up the airport baby and drive around

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Speaker 2: with it and get used to being around babies before

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Speaker 2: your flight.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, they let a lot of people visit the baby

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Speaker 4: because really they're trying to find its parents.

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Speaker 2: That's nice. I mean, that's the way to do it.

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Speaker 2: Just go door to door.

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Speaker 4: If you have a baby and you don't know of

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Speaker 4: its origin, take it to the airport and leave it

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Speaker 4: on the curb.

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Speaker 2: Drop it off.

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Speaker 4: They have curbside baby check in, and a lot of

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Speaker 4: people find their kids that way.

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Speaker 2: Curbside check in is the new firehouse an anonymous baby

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Speaker 2: drop box from the fiftiehs I believe.

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Speaker 4: Well, we're gonna have to do another loop through Allen.

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Speaker 4: I love it. It's by choice.

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Speaker 2: One of my favorite memories is I went to I

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Speaker 2: went to Scotland. I can't remember when it was two

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Speaker 2: thousand and one or two. I was on a television

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Speaker 2: show over there, no brag. Oh wow, did you not

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Speaker 2: know that about me?

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Speaker 6: Know that you were on Scottish based television?

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Speaker 2: Well it was British. It was a British channel, but

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Speaker 2: the show was shot in Glasgow, Scotland. Story here, it's

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Speaker 2: a lie. So I'm just trying to quilt it together

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Speaker 2: real quick and a convincing.

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Speaker 4: Way, try and kilt it together.

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Speaker 2: I want to put my spore in on about it. Sorry,

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Speaker 2: that was just me trying to show that I know

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Speaker 2: what kilts consist of. Anyway, I came back after three

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Speaker 2: months and my friends, this is a pre nine to

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Speaker 2: eleven story, so that that'll dictate what the year was.

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Speaker 2: What year was nine eleven?

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Speaker 4: I think two thousand.

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Speaker 2: And one one, Yeah, so this is probably this is

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Speaker 2: probably two thousand.

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Speaker 5: The real space that was your airport.

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Speaker 6: Oh now we're going back.

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Speaker 4: To tail a Taco bell. We've got to get that sponsor.

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Speaker 2: We got to talk to the manager.

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Speaker 4: I just even if I don't go through and get food.

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Speaker 4: I just want to smell one of their delicious seven

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Speaker 4: layer Gordidas.

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Speaker 2: By the way, it's nine thirty in the morning.

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Speaker 6: Yes, but they're still delicious.

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Speaker 2: Anytime of day or night. This is sixth meal.

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Speaker 4: Oh you know. And I just thought how gross it

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Speaker 4: would be to have any egg based product from Taco.

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Speaker 2: Bell because it's not gonna be egg based. It'll look

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Speaker 2: like it and it'll probably match the consistency scientifically, but

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Speaker 2: there's it's gonna be sawdust, just like all their other food.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and it's gonna come out of a caulking gun.

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Speaker 2: It's iceberg lettuce like government grade cheese and then sawdust

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Speaker 2: mixed into different colors.

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Speaker 4: I wonder if our government is offended by the phrase

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Speaker 4: government cheese because it is a poor cheese.

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Speaker 2: Well, yeah, they should make better cheese than if they're offended, Like,

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Speaker 2: you know, be proactive, you guys.

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Speaker 4: Now, the government controls our country and makes us pay taxes,

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Speaker 4: but they also produce a lot of cheese.

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Speaker 2: Right that's how That's a lot of how they get money,

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Speaker 2: you know, when when the taxes aren't being paid.

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Speaker 4: Right right from their cheese production.

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Speaker 2: So they have a cheese kitty.

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Speaker 4: Incidentally, I have an overweight uncle that also produces a

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Speaker 4: lot of cheese.

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Speaker 6: Okay, where that's gross? Am I like a gross person?

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Speaker 5: Right?

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Speaker 4: Then?

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Speaker 6: When I make chokes, I do tend to say gross things.

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Speaker 2: So you are a gross person.

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Speaker 5: Orge.

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Speaker 4: How are you in the back there?

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Speaker 7: Oh?

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Speaker 2: Yes, our sound engineer, Whorne.

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Speaker 4: Our djo thank you. Uh, I'm I'm I've been meaning,

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Speaker 4: I've been meaning to fix the air conditioning.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it's real.

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Speaker 4: It's back there sleeping because he has no other choice.

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Speaker 4: His body is shutting down.

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Speaker 2: I am going to roll a little bit too.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, that sounds all right, right.

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Speaker 2: It's fun.

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Speaker 4: It's like, let's just agree.

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Speaker 6: That this episode might be edited a little and sweetened.

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Speaker 2: They'll be definitely a load.

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Speaker 6: There's trying to be little sweet spots.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. But I also we did gauge the time, or

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Speaker 4: I forgot that we were showing up at a specific time.

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Speaker 2: Listen. We couldn't be in a better spot. This is

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Speaker 2: one of the most architecturally gorgeous, most gorgeous areas of

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Speaker 2: Los Angeles Century Boulevard.

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Speaker 4: I've said this before, I'll say it again. Prime real estate.

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Speaker 4: If you just want to see some interesting buildings. Yeah,

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Speaker 4: they aren't gray boxes.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, it's just a strip of gray boxes.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, you have to. It's the game is to search

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Speaker 2: and search for something that isn't a gray box or

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Speaker 2: an Arco, a m PM mini market. Another possible sponsor.

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Speaker 4: We are getting a sponsor.

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Speaker 2: First episode, the amazing. It really would be amazing. I

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Speaker 2: have Taco Bell as our sponsor.

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Speaker 4: Our car is going to look like Nascar. It's gonna

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Speaker 4: be just We're going to be driving a home depot

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Speaker 4: stock car.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna do that. Then we're going to just start

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Speaker 2: driving around. Here's my here's my dream. Okay, it's so

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Speaker 2: many sponsors that I can quit my job. You can

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Speaker 2: quit your job.

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Speaker 4: I don't have a job. I wish I had a

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Speaker 4: job to quit, but I don't like it anymore. That's

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Speaker 4: fake job. I quit.

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Speaker 2: So now we're free and easy. We stick all our

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Speaker 2: sponsored details on your car. We drive around all the

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Speaker 2: time and we just pick up anybody who needs a ride.

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Speaker 2: You don't have to be going somewhere or coming from somewhere.

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Speaker 2: It's like we're like a lift. We're like lift drivers,

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Speaker 2: except for that. You have to be on our podcast.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, and you don't have an annoying pink mustache.

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Speaker 2: You know, it's so weird. I thought when that first started,

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Speaker 2: I just thought it was a trend, like a thing

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Speaker 2: that you know, irritating nineteen year old girls that work

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Speaker 2: at hot topic, we're doing right to their car and

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Speaker 2: tweeted about that as if that's what was going on too.

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Speaker 4: No one told me, no one, no one was How

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Speaker 4: are you supposed to know a pink mustache is like a.

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Speaker 2: Like basically a gypsy cab teenager gypsy cab business.

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Speaker 4: Oh, every time I get in a lift car, they're

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Speaker 4: wearing a necklace made a human teeth, plan the plan

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Speaker 4: them whatever, the hand the hand clams.

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Speaker 2: Just sorry, you get witch doctor drivers. I don't understand.

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Speaker 4: Maybe I'm I'm confused.

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Speaker 6: About what a gypsy is.

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Speaker 4: But I think they you know, they wear human teeth.

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Speaker 2: Cast and nuts.

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Speaker 4: I think I said hand clams.

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Speaker 2: Hand clams. Yeah, yeah, I thought you were trying to

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Speaker 2: describe a pirate. I was with you. I don't mean

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Speaker 2: to negate your comedy. I'm really you're number one.

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Speaker 4: Fan my My comedy uh thrives on a lack of vocabulary.

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Speaker 2: And kind of a searching You have very searching fee.

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Speaker 4: I scramble to blurt things that are possible describing words,

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Speaker 4: but oftentimes I have nothing to do with what I'm

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Speaker 4: trying to say.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's kind of that's like a fun you know,

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Speaker 2: you know, eventually your brain's gonna go organic, kind of,

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Speaker 2: let's just having fun with it.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, you say, gypsy, I'll think pirate.

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Speaker 2: Let's call the whole thing off. A lot of gentlemen's

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Speaker 2: clubs down here. They took down that sign I was

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Speaker 2: talking about that. I really wish I could have shown

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Speaker 2: you that was It used to be this cool, big

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Speaker 2: seventies like font of a sign, and it's just not

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Speaker 2: here anymore.

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Speaker 4: What was it? What was it?

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Speaker 2: I think it was an adult video store? Oh, or

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Speaker 2: a gentleman's club.

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Speaker 4: I think I know why that closed. A lot of

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Speaker 4: scary people are in their homes right now watching those videos.

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Speaker 6: Only scary people, not people like me.

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Speaker 2: Oh you mean like the internet adult films. Yes, yeah, yeah,

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Speaker 2: they don't need it anymore.

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Speaker 4: No, that's something we just figured out.

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Speaker 2: So all those poor mom and pop businesses that base

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Speaker 2: their livelihoods on selling VCR strength because SAT.

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Speaker 4: Tapes of Edward Penis hands.

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Speaker 2: Now out of business.

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Speaker 5: Too bad.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, It's a shame, is it, though?

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Speaker 2: I don't know.

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Speaker 4: That always scared me, especially in Texas, these warehouses that

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Speaker 4: just have.

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Speaker 2: Pornography, filled with pornography, no windows, and then everyone had

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Speaker 2: clam hands.

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Speaker 4: That all. It helps with the process. And when I'm masturbating,

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Speaker 4: I do like to gaze out a window periodically.

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Speaker 2: You just want to see a road or a tree.

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Speaker 4: Like right when I climbax. I like to just see

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Speaker 4: a flower fluttering in.

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Speaker 2: The wind, or a nice family crossing the street.

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Speaker 4: Yeah. Motivation.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll have one of those one day if I

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Speaker 2: do this right. I put this in the right place.

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Speaker 4: Put in a warehouse on the side of a freeway.

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Speaker 4: That's not where you should be putting it.

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Speaker 2: No, it's kind of sad people had to go to

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Speaker 2: those or you're gonna have to get all the way over. Sorry, yep,

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Speaker 2: is this again in the exact same spot where I

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Speaker 2: did this to you before?

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Speaker 4: What It's okay, It's okay. I'm just gonna whenever I

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Speaker 4: get panicked, I sound like I'm very calm. I see

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Speaker 4: so right now, Yes, yes, okay, I'm going.

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Speaker 2: To Oh here we go, la la supreme.

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Speaker 4: See. The fun thing about our podcast is well we'll

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Speaker 4: just stop saying what we're saying because we're almost dying

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Speaker 4: or careening off of the road.

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Speaker 5: Right.

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Speaker 4: A lot of podcasts don't have that. They're in the

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Speaker 4: safety of a studio.

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Speaker 2: Yes, there's an electricity here with us, because our lives

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Speaker 2: are in danger the entire podcast, the entire time.

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Speaker 6: And because we're in an electric car.

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Speaker 2: That's right. We have all these glasses of water.

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Speaker 4: I'm wearing glass hoofs, much like you know, a firefighter

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Speaker 4: and a smoke tower. Mm hmm, you're right. I don't

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Speaker 4: know a lot of things. I just kind of say.

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Speaker 2: Words, well because but see here's the thing.

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Speaker 4: You know what I'm saying though, Yes, you've been to

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Speaker 4: a firefighter's smoke.

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Speaker 2: Tower where he's wearing glass hoofs.

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Speaker 4: He'll have a chair and there's like glasses because you

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Speaker 4: never know when lightning will strike your tower.

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Speaker 2: You do know, My father's a fireman, right, He's a fireman,

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Speaker 2: a real one.

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Speaker 5: Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Well he's retired now, but he was a San Francisco

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Speaker 2: fireman for like forty years. Oh wow, So all this thing,

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Speaker 2: smoke tower, glass hooves, You're full of shit, and I'm

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Speaker 2: gonna call you on it.

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Speaker 4: I'm talking about mountain fires. I don't think you know

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Speaker 4: to say mountain fire, I mean like smoky the bear

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Speaker 4: forest fires. I'm saying about Forest Service towers. That's you

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Speaker 4: reminded me of what I'm talking about. There was a

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Speaker 4: glimmer of what I was trying to say, and now

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Speaker 4: I do know. In fact, I'm talking about the Forest Service. Okay, uh,

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Speaker 4: Smoke Town, my own cheese property. And they yet oftentimes

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Speaker 4: lightning will strike those towers when they're just looking for fires.

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm getting it. So they're like

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Speaker 2: up on the top of the tower with some binox,

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Speaker 2: just kind of scanning the forest.

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Speaker 4: And they have special shoes so if they do get

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Speaker 4: struck by lightning, the current doesn't go through their body.

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Speaker 4: Oftentimes it's a glass slipper. That's maybe it isn't, but

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Speaker 4: they do have glass at the base of their chairs

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Speaker 4: for real. That I remember.

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Speaker 5: Yes, I like that.

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Speaker 2: You imagine a glass hoof, so it's like a horse's

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Speaker 2: hoof that goes on over your whole foot.

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Speaker 4: It's a princess horse who's looking for a horse prince?

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Speaker 2: Oh yeah, one of the better stories.

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Speaker 4: Hey have the glass hoof fits? You know, the old saying.

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Speaker 2: That's what she said.

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Speaker 4: It is what she said.

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Speaker 2: That's what she said.

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Speaker 4: That's what I said.

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Speaker 6: Okay, we are re entering LAX nine. Is your clock right,

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Speaker 6: we're going to No, it's an hour off the way.

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Speaker 2: I like it, so we have like six minutes. That's perfect.

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Speaker 6: Yeah, it is per See it seemed like I was

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Speaker 6: meandering about.

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Speaker 2: No way you plan the whole time.

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Speaker 4: My brain is like a Google map.

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Speaker 2: Uh huh. It doesn't work that well.

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Speaker 4: It doesn't work that well, and it shuts down often,

394
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Speaker 4: and it's me. It's screaming obscenities in my.

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Speaker 2: Car, just my brain, the little dropped pins places you

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Speaker 2: don't need them.

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Speaker 4: We are picking Rob Delaney up on US Airways flight

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Speaker 4: seven nine seven or something.

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Speaker 2: It doesn't matter, doesn't matter.

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Speaker 4: US Airways of course, a sponsor up, do you need

401
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:38,439
Speaker 4: to ride? What if we just say it?

402
00:19:38,520 --> 00:19:41,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true, proud sponsor of do you need to ride?

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Speaker 2: US Airways? US Airways the airline to fly when you're

404
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:49,600
Speaker 2: when Delta can't do it and United has nothing there.

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Speaker 4: They have a weird slogan. I never liked it. US

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Speaker 4: Airways the airway that will take you across our country.

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00:19:58,280 --> 00:20:04,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's not catching airways. The we're the Trachey of America.

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00:20:05,040 --> 00:20:07,080
Speaker 2: It's like an airway away.

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Speaker 4: We're right in your wind pipe like a bad dart.

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Speaker 2: We're gonna himlochy you across the nation US airways.

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Speaker 4: Okay, we are, we're passing United Great Lakes, Great Lakes.

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Speaker 4: What do they have an airline where? Great Lakes?

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Speaker 2: Where are you looking?

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Speaker 6: Or it's well.

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00:20:32,320 --> 00:20:36,240
Speaker 2: I mean there was a very aggressive Volkswagen Golf.

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00:20:37,640 --> 00:20:42,719
Speaker 4: Seven. I think there's a kitten back. Yeah, deal with

417
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Speaker 4: that later.

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Speaker 2: Buddy zero nine or four to two.

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Speaker 4: Alpha Rome Fox Trot. All right, we're passing international. I'm

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Speaker 4: sure Rob Delaney does comedy internationally.

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Speaker 5: But yeah he does.

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Speaker 2: He goes to London a lot.

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00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:02,200
Speaker 4: Oh it does he?

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00:21:02,440 --> 00:21:04,359
Speaker 2: Right? How's that that's Australia.

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Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, I don't do much traveling myself. I will

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Speaker 4: be in Wisconsin at a series of Indian casinos. Indian casinos,

427
00:21:14,040 --> 00:21:17,359
Speaker 4: getting our reparations, one white comedian at a time.

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Speaker 2: Oh, she's coming this way and you're going that way.

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Speaker 5: Check it out.

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00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:25,320
Speaker 6: Well, hey, we're trying to.

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Speaker 4: Run a podcast here.

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Speaker 6: Oh are you hunking?

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Speaker 5: Really?

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Speaker 6: How original?

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Speaker 4: I may have missed? Did I? I don't know that

436
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Speaker 4: I have.

437
00:21:40,560 --> 00:21:40,959
Speaker 5: I don't know.

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00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,320
Speaker 4: I am operating a motor vehicle.

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00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:46,399
Speaker 2: There's Great Lakes again, What the fuck Great Nakes is

440
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:51,040
Speaker 2: Leaks is like a new Great Nakes Leaks.

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00:21:51,440 --> 00:21:56,159
Speaker 4: Oh, great Snakes. There are no Great Snakes on this plane.

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00:21:58,400 --> 00:22:03,320
Speaker 4: I'm just gonna enter here. Okay, you know what I

443
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Speaker 4: think that I miss us airways.

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Speaker 2: I'm sorry. Can I just make a suggestion we could

445
00:22:08,600 --> 00:22:11,720
Speaker 2: just loop around one more time because it's he's we

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Speaker 2: have one minute till he lands. You're right, so we

447
00:22:14,800 --> 00:22:16,320
Speaker 2: still have time. He's going to take him a second

448
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Speaker 2: rate to get his back.

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Speaker 4: There is nothing that may I'm so comfortable looping around

450
00:22:20,560 --> 00:22:23,080
Speaker 4: the airport. Like if you ever want to have a

451
00:22:23,119 --> 00:22:27,439
Speaker 4: relaxing drive, start with the beauty of Sentry Boulevard, yes,

452
00:22:27,640 --> 00:22:29,959
Speaker 4: and then and then just cap it off with the

453
00:22:30,000 --> 00:22:30,840
Speaker 4: serenity of.

454
00:22:32,320 --> 00:22:36,320
Speaker 6: Weaving through buses here at LAX.

455
00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:39,840
Speaker 2: It's really I think most of the drivers in this

456
00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:41,919
Speaker 2: loop that we're on and sorry, but I get all

457
00:22:41,960 --> 00:22:44,800
Speaker 2: the way over because remember it's the return is all that. Yes, yes,

458
00:22:46,800 --> 00:22:51,399
Speaker 2: most of the drivers here are constantly making last second decisions,

459
00:22:51,640 --> 00:22:54,880
Speaker 2: so no one's ever in the correct lane, right, Everyone's

460
00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:57,639
Speaker 2: always like driving normally normally and then swinging over because

461
00:22:57,640 --> 00:22:59,280
Speaker 2: they saw their Great Lakes sign.

462
00:23:00,040 --> 00:23:03,480
Speaker 4: And everyone is filled with a little bit of desperation

463
00:23:03,560 --> 00:23:04,040
Speaker 4: and anger.

464
00:23:04,320 --> 00:23:06,840
Speaker 2: Right, some people are picking up people that they are

465
00:23:06,880 --> 00:23:07,760
Speaker 2: deeply in love with.

466
00:23:08,320 --> 00:23:13,600
Speaker 4: The left yeah, oh right, right here, right here, left, okay.

467
00:23:14,440 --> 00:23:17,919
Speaker 2: Left here, classic Lucille ball number.

468
00:23:20,240 --> 00:23:23,640
Speaker 4: Who's on your right? Okay?

469
00:23:23,800 --> 00:23:26,800
Speaker 2: So we're uh oh, but I'm saying, all these people,

470
00:23:26,960 --> 00:23:30,240
Speaker 2: they're picking all these stories, Chris, imagine if we could

471
00:23:30,400 --> 00:23:33,320
Speaker 2: know even five of them. Oh, like, she just picked

472
00:23:33,359 --> 00:23:35,840
Speaker 2: him up. What are they married? Brother and sister?

473
00:23:36,359 --> 00:23:37,040
Speaker 4: We'll never know.

474
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:38,560
Speaker 2: Bye bye.

475
00:23:38,840 --> 00:23:42,359
Speaker 4: That book just flew away like an old wise owl.

476
00:23:46,280 --> 00:23:48,480
Speaker 2: The one story we will know is Rob Delaney's story

477
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:51,639
Speaker 2: of his gig where he was What happened?

478
00:23:51,840 --> 00:23:54,680
Speaker 4: The book of Rob Delaney, who incidentally wrote a book.

479
00:23:55,080 --> 00:23:58,600
Speaker 2: Wrote a wonderful book. I just finished reading. I got

480
00:23:58,640 --> 00:24:00,919
Speaker 2: the galleys of what they call it, like the pre

481
00:24:01,160 --> 00:24:01,959
Speaker 2: the pre release.

482
00:24:02,240 --> 00:24:05,639
Speaker 4: Oh every periodically while reading the book is there a

483
00:24:05,720 --> 00:24:08,879
Speaker 4: disclaimer that pops up. It says the ruins do not

484
00:24:08,960 --> 00:24:11,919
Speaker 4: photocopy this book and sell it in the black market.

485
00:24:12,040 --> 00:24:16,040
Speaker 2: Do not leave this book on the plane. I hate

486
00:24:16,119 --> 00:24:20,320
Speaker 2: those in screeners. I hate screeners, I hate movies. I

487
00:24:20,359 --> 00:24:25,679
Speaker 2: hate entertainment. I only love podcasting from Taco Bell. Taco

488
00:24:25,800 --> 00:24:29,040
Speaker 2: Bell the New way to kill yourself.

489
00:24:28,640 --> 00:24:30,960
Speaker 6: Slowly Seven layers of conversation.

490
00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:36,400
Speaker 2: Taco Bell Our pocket parking lots are triangular.

491
00:24:35,960 --> 00:24:47,120
Speaker 4: Taco mell, Holy guacamole. That's good podcasting. All right, here

492
00:24:47,160 --> 00:24:50,119
Speaker 4: we go, Thank you, Horry. We are going to cut

493
00:24:50,160 --> 00:24:54,560
Speaker 4: off just fourteen lanes, all right? No, yeah, if someone's

494
00:24:54,600 --> 00:24:57,280
Speaker 4: trying to change lanes, be sure to hug their fender,

495
00:24:57,359 --> 00:25:01,880
Speaker 4: you motherfucker. We're he's only going to use course language.

496
00:25:01,920 --> 00:25:05,359
Speaker 4: But that's only because when I'm in a car, I

497
00:25:05,520 --> 00:25:06,560
Speaker 4: turn to a monster.

498
00:25:07,960 --> 00:25:11,320
Speaker 2: Well, there's it's very everyone's being a lunatic. Yeah, there's

499
00:25:11,359 --> 00:25:14,520
Speaker 2: lots of there's lots of craziness.

500
00:25:14,960 --> 00:25:17,199
Speaker 4: Oh wow, that guy, Oh he was going for it.

501
00:25:17,400 --> 00:25:20,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you beat him. And here we are. There's

502
00:25:20,480 --> 00:25:23,040
Speaker 2: a Hawaiian airlines Sun Country. Never heard of that.

503
00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:25,280
Speaker 6: We can just less jet.

504
00:25:25,640 --> 00:25:28,119
Speaker 2: What's that? Less jet sounds unsafe?

505
00:25:28,280 --> 00:25:31,840
Speaker 6: We's jet is a uh Canadian airline?

506
00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:32,360
Speaker 2: Is that true?

507
00:25:32,520 --> 00:25:32,800
Speaker 4: Yeah?

508
00:25:32,840 --> 00:25:35,080
Speaker 6: Based in Calgary, Alberta.

509
00:25:34,960 --> 00:25:36,040
Speaker 2: Oh, where they have the Rodeo.

510
00:25:36,680 --> 00:25:40,280
Speaker 4: Yes, yes, Stampede. It's called right after funny Fest of

511
00:25:40,400 --> 00:25:48,080
Speaker 4: Fledgling and shitty comedy Festival. But incidentally we're sponsored by

512
00:25:48,160 --> 00:25:48,760
Speaker 4: funny Fest.

513
00:25:49,480 --> 00:25:55,840
Speaker 2: Funny Fest, go do comedy, but pay pay for your

514
00:25:55,880 --> 00:25:57,120
Speaker 2: own travels.

515
00:25:56,760 --> 00:25:59,640
Speaker 4: And how they write it too. There all the stutters.

516
00:25:59,240 --> 00:26:04,320
Speaker 2: Are in there, seven piece. Make you record it again

517
00:26:04,359 --> 00:26:05,480
Speaker 2: if you don't stutter enough.

518
00:26:06,359 --> 00:26:12,679
Speaker 4: And we are we are approaching US airways where they

519
00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:17,879
Speaker 4: handsome dare I say, handsome Rob Delaney. We'll be jumping

520
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:22,879
Speaker 4: into my two thousand and eight Honda accord Honda. We

521
00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:26,119
Speaker 4: are entertainment or Honda.

522
00:26:26,160 --> 00:26:30,239
Speaker 2: We build excitement, Honda by us. When you're reasonable.

523
00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:33,359
Speaker 4: Bias. If you enjoy high reuse of hell.

524
00:26:33,359 --> 00:26:36,119
Speaker 2: Values, Honda, don't want to worry about a piece of

525
00:26:36,160 --> 00:26:38,960
Speaker 2: shit car, get a fucking Honda.

526
00:26:38,480 --> 00:26:44,080
Speaker 4: Idiot Honda. We also make chainsaws, Honda.

527
00:26:44,840 --> 00:26:48,840
Speaker 2: Honda. Yeah, we make pianos. Oh no, that's Yamaha shit.

528
00:26:50,280 --> 00:26:53,320
Speaker 4: I bet they do. I bet Honda makes keyboards.

529
00:26:53,960 --> 00:26:56,480
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I could look on my phone.

530
00:26:57,119 --> 00:26:59,439
Speaker 4: See if they make keyboards and then also knee boards.

531
00:27:00,320 --> 00:27:02,480
Speaker 4: A lot of times we're going to call back moments

532
00:27:02,520 --> 00:27:05,120
Speaker 4: from a previous episode. That's what just happened.

533
00:27:05,960 --> 00:27:08,800
Speaker 2: And if you care about this podcast, you'll recognize it.

534
00:27:08,920 --> 00:27:11,040
Speaker 2: You'll write to us, Oh my god, look at that.

535
00:27:11,200 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 2: Someone just drove over a orange cone.

536
00:27:13,080 --> 00:27:15,160
Speaker 4: Oh you think, oh, that's why you have four wheel

537
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:16,040
Speaker 4: drive in the city.

538
00:27:16,280 --> 00:27:18,960
Speaker 2: Jeez, that's such a jeep move. It's hilarious.

539
00:27:19,240 --> 00:27:20,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, just.

540
00:27:21,920 --> 00:27:24,200
Speaker 4: Oh and the smug look on their face.

541
00:27:24,320 --> 00:27:26,199
Speaker 2: I'm gonna I'm gonna get out and run up to

542
00:27:26,240 --> 00:27:30,440
Speaker 2: her driver's side window and be like, that was my cone. Oh,

543
00:27:30,480 --> 00:27:31,479
Speaker 2: this lady's not happy.

544
00:27:31,600 --> 00:27:35,160
Speaker 4: That was one cone that didn't belong to the city.

545
00:27:35,320 --> 00:27:38,919
Speaker 4: That was It's mistaken for unhappy often, but she's actually

546
00:27:38,920 --> 00:27:39,960
Speaker 4: probably a nice lady.

547
00:27:40,040 --> 00:27:41,840
Speaker 2: You know what it is. She has an upside down

548
00:27:41,880 --> 00:27:43,600
Speaker 2: mouth that happens to some people.

549
00:27:43,760 --> 00:27:46,600
Speaker 4: A lot of people they're smiling that it looks like

550
00:27:47,160 --> 00:27:48,320
Speaker 4: they're auditioning for the.

551
00:27:48,280 --> 00:27:54,280
Speaker 2: Grinch, which like in my family it's I when you

552
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:56,960
Speaker 2: just have a regular, resting face, it looks like you're enraged.

553
00:27:59,000 --> 00:28:01,320
Speaker 6: Oh I never knowed said about like because I have.

554
00:28:01,280 --> 00:28:04,800
Speaker 2: A low, low brow, low forehead that you have.

555
00:28:04,760 --> 00:28:08,880
Speaker 4: A false sense of you don't enraged a sense of itself.

556
00:28:10,160 --> 00:28:11,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's some problems.

557
00:28:14,080 --> 00:28:17,400
Speaker 6: Okay, we are here at a Lecoln, not at all

558
00:28:18,240 --> 00:28:18,640
Speaker 6: where we.

559
00:28:18,600 --> 00:28:21,280
Speaker 2: Said we'd be. This is uh, this is just gonna

560
00:28:21,280 --> 00:28:23,119
Speaker 2: be one of those things where we vers we solve

561
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:26,720
Speaker 2: it as we go. Does he know what kind of

562
00:28:26,720 --> 00:28:27,359
Speaker 2: car you drive?

563
00:28:27,880 --> 00:28:29,800
Speaker 6: I don't have his phone number.

564
00:28:30,000 --> 00:28:38,920
Speaker 4: It was very it's very uh oh maybe hi, Yeah,

565
00:28:38,960 --> 00:28:40,960
Speaker 4: we might circle around. We don't see him. Thanks.

566
00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:45,480
Speaker 2: I mean I think they I think they hired that

567
00:28:45,480 --> 00:28:47,120
Speaker 2: guy because he's so intimidating looking.

568
00:28:47,320 --> 00:28:53,720
Speaker 7: That guy, I've never He was like a psychopathic shaquilloel

569
00:28:53,760 --> 00:28:56,120
Speaker 7: and you can imagine that he had a look and

570
00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,640
Speaker 7: as I like, not only will I crush you with

571
00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:05,240
Speaker 7: just my hands and flanges, I carry a machete, not

572
00:29:05,280 --> 00:29:05,760
Speaker 7: a gun.

573
00:29:06,680 --> 00:29:09,760
Speaker 2: No, he wants to see his man up close.

574
00:29:10,640 --> 00:29:12,880
Speaker 6: Do you see how long he looked at me before

575
00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:13,680
Speaker 6: he started talking.

576
00:29:13,800 --> 00:29:15,960
Speaker 2: No, I couldn't look at him because I'm holding a microphone.

577
00:29:16,400 --> 00:29:17,200
Speaker 2: She's so dumb.

578
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:22,320
Speaker 4: And by holding a microphone, you're mispronouncing because you're racist.

579
00:29:22,920 --> 00:29:28,320
Speaker 4: Just kidding now, he was a he was a huge man.

580
00:29:28,560 --> 00:29:32,520
Speaker 6: We are really I I realized that that way.

581
00:29:33,160 --> 00:29:36,840
Speaker 4: It's kind of oh my god, you just he just

582
00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:38,920
Speaker 4: tweeted at us.

583
00:29:40,640 --> 00:29:42,480
Speaker 2: I just told him they made a circle again, Like

584
00:29:42,520 --> 00:29:46,480
Speaker 2: everybody understands that at this airport especially, they do not

585
00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:50,280
Speaker 2: let you linger. And do you have to let it linger?

586
00:29:50,560 --> 00:29:52,280
Speaker 2: Do you have to do you have to.

587
00:29:52,720 --> 00:30:00,000
Speaker 4: You have to. Oh, I'm such a fool for you,

588
00:30:03,560 --> 00:30:03,880
Speaker 4: you know.

589
00:30:04,200 --> 00:30:05,720
Speaker 2: No, not this one, the next one.

590
00:30:06,360 --> 00:30:09,680
Speaker 4: Yeah, song originally about farts.

591
00:30:10,040 --> 00:30:13,080
Speaker 2: Yep, I am twelve.

592
00:30:13,520 --> 00:30:17,760
Speaker 4: Here we go and this is this is all becoming familiar.

593
00:30:17,840 --> 00:30:18,680
Speaker 2: Careful of my dad?

594
00:30:18,680 --> 00:30:22,880
Speaker 6: Here ye hi that jacket sponsored by Eddie Bauer.

595
00:30:24,040 --> 00:30:26,600
Speaker 2: Eddie Bauer. When you have kind of a lot of money,

596
00:30:26,600 --> 00:30:28,480
Speaker 2: but you want people to think you have a ton.

597
00:30:28,320 --> 00:30:30,479
Speaker 4: Of money, Eddie Bauer.

598
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:34,479
Speaker 6: We're not quite ellban Eddie Bauer.

599
00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:38,600
Speaker 2: Wide hips, lady, wide hipped ladies are grateful for us.

600
00:30:38,840 --> 00:30:41,040
Speaker 4: Eddie Bauer. Loose lips, sink.

601
00:30:40,880 --> 00:30:44,200
Speaker 2: Ships, Eddie Bower whites only.

602
00:30:46,200 --> 00:30:49,600
Speaker 4: Yeah, that was a lesser they I think they knew

603
00:30:49,680 --> 00:30:51,480
Speaker 4: right away the problem with that one.

604
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:55,040
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, nice one. Yeah, you're you're learning yet, super gross.

605
00:30:55,080 --> 00:30:56,800
Speaker 4: All you have to do is look at everyone like

606
00:30:56,800 --> 00:30:57,560
Speaker 4: you're a psychoe.

607
00:30:57,600 --> 00:30:59,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's how you do it. You learn from that

608
00:31:00,000 --> 00:31:01,240
Speaker 2: security guard that made us move.

609
00:31:01,280 --> 00:31:03,600
Speaker 6: Oh my god, he was scary. That man will haunt

610
00:31:03,640 --> 00:31:04,200
Speaker 6: my dreams.

611
00:31:04,200 --> 00:31:05,680
Speaker 2: Oh, I'm so glad I didn't look at him.

612
00:31:05,680 --> 00:31:07,800
Speaker 4: Then he was scary.

613
00:31:08,560 --> 00:31:10,560
Speaker 6: He really was scary.

614
00:31:10,760 --> 00:31:13,200
Speaker 4: And it's not I'm not he happened to look he

615
00:31:13,240 --> 00:31:17,280
Speaker 4: had like that baby face. Ooh, kind of like Shaquiel O'Neal,

616
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:19,479
Speaker 4: except it was riddled with anger.

617
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:23,400
Speaker 2: Oh no, well, his job is to tell people to move.

618
00:31:23,720 --> 00:31:27,320
Speaker 2: I mean, that's such a bummer, right Air Canada, Hawaiian.

619
00:31:27,360 --> 00:31:30,800
Speaker 2: Here we go. Okay, we're close. Where's Rob Delaney? So

620
00:31:30,920 --> 00:31:33,080
Speaker 2: tall and striking? You think you'd see him immediately?

621
00:31:33,320 --> 00:31:36,600
Speaker 4: Oh, there he is. He's actually striking somebody. He's in

622
00:31:36,640 --> 00:31:37,880
Speaker 4: a fight with our shack guy.

623
00:31:37,960 --> 00:31:39,440
Speaker 2: Where the fuck is he?

624
00:31:39,760 --> 00:31:42,560
Speaker 4: There he is? Oh, the road hasn't been No, that's

625
00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:43,200
Speaker 4: not him.

626
00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:45,720
Speaker 2: It's the road turned him into a woman.

627
00:31:46,160 --> 00:31:50,000
Speaker 4: We just witnessed a five foot eight thin Rob.

628
00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:52,400
Speaker 2: Delaney and he was not funny at all.

629
00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:58,840
Speaker 4: Oh no, Robbed Delaney's Morvey Corsey legged athletic man. He's

630
00:31:58,880 --> 00:32:05,680
Speaker 4: gotta carrying ams on him. Here we go. That seemed conclusionary,

631
00:32:05,800 --> 00:32:07,040
Speaker 4: like I saw him, but good.

632
00:32:07,120 --> 00:32:11,640
Speaker 2: Nope, here we go, and there's down for the right.

633
00:32:11,800 --> 00:32:15,560
Speaker 2: Here we go, Here we here we go, and and

634
00:32:15,720 --> 00:32:16,280
Speaker 2: here we go.

635
00:32:17,160 --> 00:32:22,400
Speaker 4: That security guard with a also not Robbed Delaney.

636
00:32:22,080 --> 00:32:25,600
Speaker 2: Look away look away? Is he sitting? Would he wear

637
00:32:25,600 --> 00:32:28,400
Speaker 2: a baseball hat? I say, no, it's not his style.

638
00:32:28,600 --> 00:32:32,080
Speaker 4: No, No, he's he Uh you know, maybe a lot.

639
00:32:32,200 --> 00:32:38,920
Speaker 4: You're surprised when you see someone travel. Yeah. Yeah. Some

640
00:32:38,960 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 4: people are like full pajama Yeah, full pajamas and a fedora.

641
00:32:43,280 --> 00:32:47,200
Speaker 4: Other people's are like a cape, baseball pants and cowboy boots.

642
00:32:48,040 --> 00:32:50,200
Speaker 4: It's your time to shine when you're traveling. No one's

643
00:32:50,240 --> 00:32:52,560
Speaker 4: gonna see you. Oh no, everyone does see you.

644
00:32:52,680 --> 00:32:55,400
Speaker 6: Here. He is here, he is.

645
00:32:54,480 --> 00:32:59,360
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah.

646
00:32:57,840 --> 00:33:05,400
Speaker 6: And it's confirmed no hair. I will help him.

647
00:33:05,960 --> 00:33:12,840
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, thank you. Oh sure, sure, it's in my pocket. Hi,

648
00:33:18,440 --> 00:33:24,920
Speaker 4: thank you for joining us. Get in there, but oh

649
00:33:24,960 --> 00:33:25,720
Speaker 4: I'll unlocked that.

650
00:33:30,960 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 2: Y real good. How are you here? I got your

651
00:33:35,040 --> 00:33:35,520
Speaker 2: gift bag?

652
00:33:35,720 --> 00:33:37,360
Speaker 5: Thank you. Oh my god, that's so sweet of you.

653
00:33:37,760 --> 00:33:39,760
Speaker 2: Just some stuff. I don't know what you need, thank you.

654
00:33:39,920 --> 00:33:42,280
Speaker 5: I need a banana that's in there. Thank you.

655
00:33:42,560 --> 00:33:45,400
Speaker 4: That was supposed to be a hot towel, but the

656
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:49,640
Speaker 4: Starbucks we went to was packed and filled with people raging.

657
00:33:49,800 --> 00:33:52,520
Speaker 2: Okay, I wanted to give you a hot towel and

658
00:33:52,520 --> 00:33:53,120
Speaker 2: then a dry.

659
00:33:52,960 --> 00:33:54,880
Speaker 5: Tell you can sweet of you. Yeah, that's a good

660
00:33:54,920 --> 00:33:55,720
Speaker 5: idea after a flight.

661
00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:59,400
Speaker 2: Where were you tell us about your was?

662
00:33:59,760 --> 00:34:04,880
Speaker 8: I played the College of New Jersey, I played Pittsburgh,

663
00:34:05,160 --> 00:34:07,760
Speaker 8: I played Philadelphia and Buffalo.

664
00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:09,680
Speaker 4: You'll notice in that gift bag there was a mug

665
00:34:09,719 --> 00:34:10,520
Speaker 4: from New Jersey.

666
00:34:10,600 --> 00:34:11,800
Speaker 5: Oh my god, that's great.

667
00:34:12,000 --> 00:34:13,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, just to commemorate your time that.

668
00:34:14,080 --> 00:34:17,160
Speaker 8: I often bring my wife a mug from the places

669
00:34:17,160 --> 00:34:17,560
Speaker 8: that I go.

670
00:34:17,840 --> 00:34:20,640
Speaker 5: I didn't this time, except now I did.

671
00:34:21,800 --> 00:34:22,680
Speaker 4: You found your wife?

672
00:34:22,880 --> 00:34:22,960
Speaker 7: She?

673
00:34:23,440 --> 00:34:26,040
Speaker 6: I thought maybe got trapped during there.

674
00:34:27,280 --> 00:34:30,320
Speaker 8: Somebody went to Quizno's and found her. She went times

675
00:34:30,320 --> 00:34:32,160
Speaker 8: of Trial. It's like a lot of people. She goes

676
00:34:32,200 --> 00:34:32,720
Speaker 8: to Quizno's.

677
00:34:33,080 --> 00:34:36,319
Speaker 4: I left a guitar in a Quiznos bathroom once it

678
00:34:36,400 --> 00:34:38,400
Speaker 4: got back to me, so I knew she'd be fine.

679
00:34:40,160 --> 00:34:44,080
Speaker 4: So you did a series of theaters and college schools.

680
00:34:44,160 --> 00:34:47,160
Speaker 8: Yeah, I hit some stories, some cities in the Northeast

681
00:34:47,160 --> 00:34:47,760
Speaker 8: and it was great.

682
00:34:47,840 --> 00:34:49,120
Speaker 5: Pittsburgh was awesome.

683
00:34:49,160 --> 00:34:52,200
Speaker 8: I never had a bus do this to you.

684
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,200
Speaker 5: Uh wow, that was a bold move.

685
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:57,520
Speaker 8: Hurts for those who are only doing the auto portion

686
00:34:57,560 --> 00:34:59,920
Speaker 8: of the show. A bus pretty much drove over the car.

687
00:35:00,400 --> 00:35:03,040
Speaker 4: Now I know why they themselves hurt.

688
00:35:03,400 --> 00:35:04,839
Speaker 5: That's right, I am.

689
00:35:05,080 --> 00:35:06,000
Speaker 2: That's a long tour.

690
00:35:06,840 --> 00:35:10,080
Speaker 5: It sounded like it was four nights. Yeah, four places,

691
00:35:10,080 --> 00:35:10,560
Speaker 5: four nights.

692
00:35:10,760 --> 00:35:13,080
Speaker 2: And are you tired now? But do you feel enlivened?

693
00:35:13,239 --> 00:35:17,279
Speaker 8: No, I'm pretty ruined because while those are places with

694
00:35:17,440 --> 00:35:19,759
Speaker 8: nice people, the weathers are awful and snowing, and so

695
00:35:20,200 --> 00:35:21,799
Speaker 8: I then you have to fly little planes, like you

696
00:35:21,840 --> 00:35:23,920
Speaker 8: have to connect when you fly from Buffalo to Pittsburgh.

697
00:35:23,920 --> 00:35:26,640
Speaker 8: So I've been in thirty planes in the last four days.

698
00:35:26,920 --> 00:35:29,719
Speaker 8: So like, my throat feels like somebody just you know,

699
00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:32,399
Speaker 8: scoured it with a brillopath.

700
00:35:31,920 --> 00:35:33,960
Speaker 4: Because when you fly, you just scream at the top

701
00:35:35,160 --> 00:35:37,239
Speaker 4: all the time. That's the only way I get through it.

702
00:35:37,320 --> 00:35:40,200
Speaker 4: A lot of people complain about babies, but it's usually

703
00:35:40,239 --> 00:35:40,840
Speaker 4: this guy.

704
00:35:40,800 --> 00:35:47,399
Speaker 8: Yeah, screaming adult. So colleges one college, the other three

705
00:35:47,440 --> 00:35:50,120
Speaker 8: were theaters.

706
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:52,799
Speaker 5: And yeah, it was great. I enjoyed playing colleges. They're not.

707
00:35:53,040 --> 00:35:56,360
Speaker 8: College students aren't as smart as they get credit for.

708
00:35:56,520 --> 00:35:58,799
Speaker 8: They think like, oh, hot bet of education, but they don't.

709
00:35:58,800 --> 00:36:00,279
Speaker 8: They haven't lived, you know what I'm I mean, they

710
00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:03,200
Speaker 8: haven't they haven't had life just kick them in the

711
00:36:03,239 --> 00:36:05,759
Speaker 8: head fifty times, like you do once you get out

712
00:36:05,760 --> 00:36:08,880
Speaker 8: of college. So I generally I prefer to perform for

713
00:36:09,000 --> 00:36:11,160
Speaker 8: older people. I mean, you have to get your tenter

714
00:36:11,200 --> 00:36:14,160
Speaker 8: hooks into college students and say, I'm who will entertain

715
00:36:14,200 --> 00:36:15,240
Speaker 8: you for the next few decades.

716
00:36:15,280 --> 00:36:15,880
Speaker 5: Get to know me.

717
00:36:16,120 --> 00:36:19,160
Speaker 8: It's important to spread the disease. But generally I prefer

718
00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:21,080
Speaker 8: to perform for adults.

719
00:36:21,520 --> 00:36:24,040
Speaker 2: I have just a larger range of references.

720
00:36:24,120 --> 00:36:26,319
Speaker 5: Yeah, they just have no experienced more.

721
00:36:26,520 --> 00:36:30,799
Speaker 4: Yeah, college kids are so young. They are amazing to me.

722
00:36:31,440 --> 00:36:35,640
Speaker 8: Their children wonderful and and smart and have you know,

723
00:36:35,880 --> 00:36:37,839
Speaker 8: I mean God knows like I read a lot back then,

724
00:36:37,880 --> 00:36:40,160
Speaker 8: and I listened to utter Field and garbage.

725
00:36:40,160 --> 00:36:42,560
Speaker 5: So I would very grateful if a comedian came to

726
00:36:42,600 --> 00:36:43,080
Speaker 5: my school.

727
00:36:43,120 --> 00:36:45,120
Speaker 8: But you know, at the end of the day, they're

728
00:36:45,120 --> 00:36:49,120
Speaker 8: still less important as real people, normal human beings.

729
00:36:49,120 --> 00:36:51,680
Speaker 6: They aren't fully developed or fully valuable.

730
00:36:51,760 --> 00:36:53,879
Speaker 2: Yet not they shouldn't be allowed to talk that much

731
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:56,360
Speaker 2: as much as they seem to allowed.

732
00:36:56,200 --> 00:36:56,879
Speaker 5: Me here and there.

733
00:36:56,920 --> 00:36:59,880
Speaker 2: But yeah you should, I need help whatever.

734
00:36:59,800 --> 00:37:05,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, listen to that. But if they just start sharing anidotes, anecdotes, aidotes,

735
00:37:05,360 --> 00:37:10,480
Speaker 4: and I'll take an start sharing dozy dotes or just

736
00:37:10,520 --> 00:37:15,520
Speaker 4: cut them off with little lambsy divy. You know it's

737
00:37:15,520 --> 00:37:18,680
Speaker 4: funny because kids will also do that. They tend to

738
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:21,560
Speaker 4: I let a joke happen and then I stomp on

739
00:37:21,600 --> 00:37:22,600
Speaker 4: it by continuing it.

740
00:37:22,719 --> 00:37:25,440
Speaker 5: And with kids, you're into goats now, right, Yeah, okay.

741
00:37:25,200 --> 00:37:31,160
Speaker 4: Good anything if it has a whole fuck itis, it's

742
00:37:31,520 --> 00:37:34,200
Speaker 4: it's okay to sometimes be dirty because we're adults.

743
00:37:34,239 --> 00:37:35,400
Speaker 2: But we're still at the airport.

744
00:37:35,800 --> 00:37:37,760
Speaker 6: Oh you're right, this lax I forgot.

745
00:37:37,880 --> 00:37:39,960
Speaker 8: Do you remember not too long after nine to eleven,

746
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:44,040
Speaker 8: when the Israeli airline l all X messad guy somebody

747
00:37:44,120 --> 00:37:47,440
Speaker 8: just was like made a slight ruckus in line and

748
00:37:47,480 --> 00:37:50,360
Speaker 8: the guy just shot him dead and he was like, well, massade.

749
00:37:50,640 --> 00:37:53,840
Speaker 8: So when people mess around and Israeli airlines, we just

750
00:37:53,880 --> 00:37:56,360
Speaker 8: sort of address it and get rid of the problem.

751
00:37:56,600 --> 00:37:58,399
Speaker 8: And everybody was like all right. It was so soon

752
00:37:58,480 --> 00:38:00,399
Speaker 8: after nine eleven. The people like, that's fine.

753
00:38:00,520 --> 00:38:01,920
Speaker 5: He sneezed. He had to be shocked.

754
00:38:02,520 --> 00:38:03,120
Speaker 2: It makes sense.

755
00:38:03,400 --> 00:38:04,360
Speaker 4: He's being cautious.

756
00:38:04,440 --> 00:38:06,160
Speaker 5: You guys sneeze. He sneezed out loud.

757
00:38:07,280 --> 00:38:10,279
Speaker 4: Oh wow, that's I didn't that didn't get a lot

758
00:38:10,280 --> 00:38:10,800
Speaker 4: of coverage.

759
00:38:10,920 --> 00:38:12,600
Speaker 5: Yeah, that was one of my favorite shootings.

760
00:38:12,640 --> 00:38:14,200
Speaker 4: I missed a lot of news.

761
00:38:14,560 --> 00:38:17,960
Speaker 2: I guess it didn't hit my top ten shootings, but

762
00:38:17,960 --> 00:38:18,960
Speaker 2: but I'll reconsider.

763
00:38:19,320 --> 00:38:23,279
Speaker 4: Yeah. I like the classics, just sixties clock towers. So

764
00:38:23,320 --> 00:38:25,600
Speaker 4: I'm gonna get okay. Yeah, I know where I'm at.

765
00:38:26,080 --> 00:38:28,320
Speaker 4: I know where I'm at it's funny. It's it's difficult

766
00:38:28,320 --> 00:38:31,040
Speaker 4: to drive and podcast.

767
00:38:30,560 --> 00:38:31,719
Speaker 5: If you Oh, I believe it.

768
00:38:31,840 --> 00:38:34,799
Speaker 6: Yeah, I'm going to keep blaming that.

769
00:38:35,200 --> 00:38:37,239
Speaker 5: Yeah. No, I find it difficult to drive and think

770
00:38:37,320 --> 00:38:37,919
Speaker 5: I'll miss an.

771
00:38:37,800 --> 00:38:39,120
Speaker 8: Exit and I'll be like, yeah, but I was thinking

772
00:38:39,160 --> 00:38:41,040
Speaker 8: about a sandwich I had three weeks ago.

773
00:38:41,880 --> 00:38:43,440
Speaker 4: And you want a sandwich by the way.

774
00:38:43,320 --> 00:38:44,839
Speaker 5: You know, I'm all set.

775
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:46,160
Speaker 2: There's almonds in there.

776
00:38:47,520 --> 00:38:55,040
Speaker 5: Oh wow, thank you. No, there's Karen Comedians road.

777
00:38:55,480 --> 00:38:58,920
Speaker 4: You said that I noticed Rob had dry hands always.

778
00:38:58,920 --> 00:39:00,520
Speaker 5: I never said that, Oh my god.

779
00:39:00,840 --> 00:39:04,279
Speaker 8: That's like, Actually, I'm not like a fascist as far

780
00:39:04,320 --> 00:39:05,439
Speaker 8: as appearances go on people.

781
00:39:05,480 --> 00:39:06,839
Speaker 5: I'm like, hey, you're gonna look like what you're gonna

782
00:39:06,840 --> 00:39:07,120
Speaker 5: look like.

783
00:39:07,239 --> 00:39:09,760
Speaker 8: But when I do see people with wearing open toed

784
00:39:09,920 --> 00:39:13,120
Speaker 8: sandals or whatever and they have like dry or cracky feet,

785
00:39:13,160 --> 00:39:14,680
Speaker 8: I do think, you know what, maybe you want to

786
00:39:14,680 --> 00:39:17,080
Speaker 8: address that if you keep those things uncovered.

787
00:39:16,719 --> 00:39:18,600
Speaker 4: Are you trying to show me your feet or make

788
00:39:18,640 --> 00:39:19,919
Speaker 4: me hungry for ginger root?

789
00:39:22,360 --> 00:39:22,920
Speaker 5: Seriously?

790
00:39:23,320 --> 00:39:25,560
Speaker 4: I don't Yeah, I do not want to see anyone soon.

791
00:39:25,640 --> 00:39:28,239
Speaker 8: Your feet looked like high quality old parmesan.

792
00:39:30,160 --> 00:39:32,120
Speaker 2: You know, I'm starving to get all of dart in

793
00:39:32,520 --> 00:39:33,840
Speaker 2: the highest of quality.

794
00:39:36,680 --> 00:39:37,319
Speaker 5: But I'll tell you what.

795
00:39:37,360 --> 00:39:39,040
Speaker 8: When you guys said, when you put out, you put

796
00:39:39,040 --> 00:39:42,840
Speaker 8: an app essentially you BCC the comedians of Los Angeles.

797
00:39:42,920 --> 00:39:44,520
Speaker 4: I did. I did it blindly.

798
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:46,960
Speaker 8: I knew to do that and uh and you said,

799
00:39:46,960 --> 00:39:47,359
Speaker 8: who wants?

800
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:49,160
Speaker 5: And I thought, oh my god, I can't wait to do.

801
00:39:49,120 --> 00:39:51,920
Speaker 8: This, cause, frankly, I don't do too many podcasts just

802
00:39:51,920 --> 00:39:53,360
Speaker 8: because what am I gonna talk about me?

803
00:39:53,680 --> 00:39:53,759
Speaker 4: No?

804
00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:56,240
Speaker 5: Thanks, I've we've covered that ground.

805
00:39:56,440 --> 00:39:58,400
Speaker 8: But I love the two of you so much that

806
00:39:58,440 --> 00:40:01,000
Speaker 8: it was It was such a thrill, and I also

807
00:40:01,239 --> 00:40:02,560
Speaker 8: selfishly needed a ride.

808
00:40:03,080 --> 00:40:05,759
Speaker 4: That's I didn't even know. I kind of had a

809
00:40:05,840 --> 00:40:08,279
Speaker 4: hunch that it would be a built in loophole of

810
00:40:08,520 --> 00:40:14,080
Speaker 4: acquiring talent, but I didn't know that I would get

811
00:40:14,160 --> 00:40:17,239
Speaker 4: such a response. There was a list of people waiting.

812
00:40:17,120 --> 00:40:18,359
Speaker 5: Oh wow, I love it.

813
00:40:18,440 --> 00:40:21,520
Speaker 4: We were very happy, will be our first guest?

814
00:40:21,680 --> 00:40:23,359
Speaker 5: Yeah, no, way, really the first?

815
00:40:23,360 --> 00:40:27,200
Speaker 8: Oh my god, that's so exciting. HI very well, happily

816
00:40:27,400 --> 00:40:28,680
Speaker 8: tell the world about it.

817
00:40:29,280 --> 00:40:32,319
Speaker 4: We did one together just to see what it was

818
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:34,839
Speaker 4: like to realize that a lot of conversation would be

819
00:40:35,000 --> 00:40:39,840
Speaker 4: about accidents avoidance because we, you know, we're in a

820
00:40:39,840 --> 00:40:40,520
Speaker 4: moving vehicle.

821
00:40:40,719 --> 00:40:41,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, this is real.

822
00:40:41,719 --> 00:40:43,960
Speaker 8: Well, I think I'm one of the I'm probably up

823
00:40:44,000 --> 00:40:47,880
Speaker 8: there as far as comedians being known for having showy

824
00:40:48,000 --> 00:40:51,080
Speaker 8: car accidents, So we don't even have to cover.

825
00:40:50,960 --> 00:40:53,760
Speaker 6: That you had an incredible car accident.

826
00:40:54,320 --> 00:40:56,160
Speaker 5: Little car accidents are even interesting to me.

827
00:40:56,680 --> 00:41:05,520
Speaker 4: And yet I have not yet read Sister Long Falcon Cabbage.

828
00:41:05,680 --> 00:41:09,720
Speaker 8: A lot of them, Turban, We've put a lot of body.

829
00:41:10,640 --> 00:41:13,800
Speaker 8: Yea Blaine just flew over our head. That's never not exciting.

830
00:41:13,440 --> 00:41:16,239
Speaker 2: For me, just constant proof that this is not in

831
00:41:16,320 --> 00:41:18,560
Speaker 2: any way put on that we just we go by

832
00:41:18,600 --> 00:41:22,280
Speaker 2: the lowest flight paths, we try to get hit by buses.

833
00:41:22,560 --> 00:41:24,880
Speaker 2: I did read your books, Oh thank you, Well, it

834
00:41:24,920 --> 00:41:28,239
Speaker 2: was my pleasure. I found the galleys no fence that

835
00:41:28,400 --> 00:41:32,160
Speaker 2: work and snatched it up, and I was doing that thing.

836
00:41:34,320 --> 00:41:37,120
Speaker 2: I want this compliment to mean more than the average compliment.

837
00:41:37,160 --> 00:41:38,080
Speaker 2: How do I word it?

838
00:41:38,320 --> 00:41:38,440
Speaker 4: Like?

839
00:41:38,520 --> 00:41:41,160
Speaker 2: I was doing that thing on the plane where I

840
00:41:41,320 --> 00:41:44,719
Speaker 2: was laughing but then crying a little bit, and I

841
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:46,920
Speaker 2: was almost sure that the lady next to me thought

842
00:41:46,920 --> 00:41:49,200
Speaker 2: I was having a nervous breakdown because it was those

843
00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:53,799
Speaker 2: like those stories, like those stories when you're in like

844
00:41:53,960 --> 00:41:56,439
Speaker 2: rehab and waiting to see if you're gonna go to jail,

845
00:41:56,440 --> 00:41:58,359
Speaker 2: and we're like, all those things are so fraught and

846
00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:01,319
Speaker 2: that I like, I feel like I had a very

847
00:42:01,320 --> 00:42:03,440
Speaker 2: parallel life in that way of like drinking and like

848
00:42:03,480 --> 00:42:07,960
Speaker 2: really just kind of throwing yourself out there so dangerously

849
00:42:08,040 --> 00:42:10,399
Speaker 2: all the time. And I'm just happy you.

850
00:42:10,360 --> 00:42:10,960
Speaker 5: Live as well.

851
00:42:11,000 --> 00:42:14,600
Speaker 4: Thank you to SOB you're sober people, and I'm I'm

852
00:42:14,640 --> 00:42:17,240
Speaker 4: someone that's still as a bit of a whiskey nerd.

853
00:42:18,200 --> 00:42:21,800
Speaker 6: I uh known to should I read the book?

854
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:23,040
Speaker 4: I should read the book?

855
00:42:24,120 --> 00:42:26,200
Speaker 5: You can? I should have I should have brought a copy.

856
00:42:26,360 --> 00:42:28,640
Speaker 4: I will. I will purchase it like a like a

857
00:42:28,719 --> 00:42:29,440
Speaker 4: grown adult.

858
00:42:29,560 --> 00:42:29,960
Speaker 5: Thank you?

859
00:42:30,080 --> 00:42:31,839
Speaker 2: How dare you I want to call.

860
00:42:31,800 --> 00:42:34,560
Speaker 4: Myself an adult? Well, I did buy it like a silly.

861
00:42:34,320 --> 00:42:38,080
Speaker 2: Kid chewing gumb with your hat on backwards.

862
00:42:38,120 --> 00:42:41,000
Speaker 4: But in it you probably detail you had a horrible

863
00:42:41,400 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 4: car wreck, right your legs got a.

864
00:42:43,360 --> 00:42:47,120
Speaker 8: Yeah, my both my arms got broken, or rather one

865
00:42:47,200 --> 00:42:49,600
Speaker 8: arm one wrist, and but they were both had to

866
00:42:49,600 --> 00:42:51,520
Speaker 8: have surgery and were both in cast. And then my

867
00:42:51,600 --> 00:42:54,360
Speaker 8: legs were not broken, but they were cut open to

868
00:42:54,440 --> 00:42:56,239
Speaker 8: the bone on the knees, so they had to be

869
00:42:56,560 --> 00:42:58,320
Speaker 8: so I had to so I couldn't bend them for

870
00:42:58,320 --> 00:43:00,000
Speaker 8: a while, so they put them in these legs stabilized

871
00:43:00,080 --> 00:43:00,520
Speaker 8: or saying.

872
00:43:00,480 --> 00:43:02,319
Speaker 6: His legs were cut out. Were you in like a

873
00:43:02,360 --> 00:43:03,160
Speaker 6: metal jeep?

874
00:43:03,560 --> 00:43:05,680
Speaker 8: A metal jeep? A lot of the car that I

875
00:43:05,719 --> 00:43:07,319
Speaker 8: was in was made of metal. In fact, it was

876
00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:10,719
Speaker 8: a Nissan Ultima metal version and.

877
00:43:11,160 --> 00:43:18,399
Speaker 4: All metal interior, a leather See that's a shaming, Yeah.

878
00:43:15,880 --> 00:43:21,839
Speaker 8: That reverse the exos skeleton. But it was yeah, and

879
00:43:21,880 --> 00:43:23,080
Speaker 8: you know, and yeah, and then I went to jail

880
00:43:23,160 --> 00:43:25,719
Speaker 8: and rehab and lived in a halfway house. And you know,

881
00:43:25,840 --> 00:43:27,400
Speaker 8: it's good that it happened. No one else was in

882
00:43:27,440 --> 00:43:27,880
Speaker 8: the accident.

883
00:43:27,920 --> 00:43:28,319
Speaker 5: It was just me.

884
00:43:28,440 --> 00:43:30,440
Speaker 8: But yeah, then I put the plug in the jug,

885
00:43:30,560 --> 00:43:33,319
Speaker 8: as they say, and uh, and I think I did

886
00:43:33,360 --> 00:43:35,279
Speaker 8: my first open mic, you know a few months later.

887
00:43:35,440 --> 00:43:38,200
Speaker 4: And by that you mean you got a masst ectomy, right, correct?

888
00:43:38,239 --> 00:43:42,200
Speaker 8: All right, Sorry, I had my breath removed and I

889
00:43:42,239 --> 00:43:45,600
Speaker 8: went from Cynthia Delaney to Rob Delaney.

890
00:43:46,200 --> 00:43:49,360
Speaker 4: That's what started that old transition. What was it like

891
00:43:49,400 --> 00:43:52,239
Speaker 4: buying a whole new wardrobe. I meant to say, where

892
00:43:52,280 --> 00:43:54,279
Speaker 4: you don't want you're a man, and you don't want

893
00:43:54,280 --> 00:43:57,800
Speaker 4: to have babies anymore. The sector want to be honest,

894
00:43:57,840 --> 00:43:59,520
Speaker 4: with me, Karen, do you think I'm a dumb person?

895
00:44:00,200 --> 00:44:03,520
Speaker 4: Often you have blurts hangs that don't make sense.

896
00:44:03,600 --> 00:44:06,399
Speaker 2: I think blurting is the bravest thing an American can

897
00:44:06,440 --> 00:44:10,560
Speaker 2: do these days. Everyone so rehearsed and practice. I know

898
00:44:10,680 --> 00:44:13,320
Speaker 2: exactly what I'm gonna say. You just throw words out there.

899
00:44:14,760 --> 00:44:15,120
Speaker 5: In case.

900
00:44:15,200 --> 00:44:17,239
Speaker 8: Like people come to this podcast because I put it

901
00:44:17,280 --> 00:44:19,279
Speaker 8: out there, and in meeting you for the first time,

902
00:44:19,320 --> 00:44:21,200
Speaker 8: I want them to watch a recent conan said Chris,

903
00:44:21,239 --> 00:44:23,319
Speaker 8: because that's the best sets of stand up I've ever seen.

904
00:44:23,600 --> 00:44:25,440
Speaker 5: Thank you, And it's such so hard. I mean to

905
00:44:25,480 --> 00:44:28,120
Speaker 5: do seven minutes, you know, and have it be great.

906
00:44:29,320 --> 00:44:30,160
Speaker 5: It's really hard.

907
00:44:30,160 --> 00:44:33,680
Speaker 2: And his turn, it's like, that's my love. There was

908
00:44:33,760 --> 00:44:36,520
Speaker 2: no like here I am to do your comedy shows,

909
00:44:36,600 --> 00:44:37,839
Speaker 2: like here's here you are.

910
00:44:37,880 --> 00:44:40,839
Speaker 5: My comedy show. You guys.

911
00:44:41,000 --> 00:44:44,840
Speaker 2: I don't usually my own mustache top cop on the weekend.

912
00:44:46,080 --> 00:44:48,480
Speaker 4: See it's very it's a it's a I went four

913
00:44:48,480 --> 00:44:50,759
Speaker 4: inch domestic. A lot of guys that go handlebar, but

914
00:44:50,800 --> 00:44:54,200
Speaker 4: I didn't want to intimidate anyone. I'm so glad I

915
00:44:54,200 --> 00:44:56,440
Speaker 4: didn't make it to my I don't usually toot my

916
00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:58,960
Speaker 4: own horn and then honk the horn. That's oh god,

917
00:44:59,200 --> 00:45:01,480
Speaker 4: that would have been off. Well, here we go.

918
00:45:02,560 --> 00:45:04,879
Speaker 5: Uh people hear that the horn?

919
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:07,279
Speaker 2: Micd we got to this horn?

920
00:45:07,360 --> 00:45:10,280
Speaker 5: Yeah, pay, I should say we're about to pass.

921
00:45:10,360 --> 00:45:12,480
Speaker 8: If you went, if you took a right here, you

922
00:45:12,520 --> 00:45:14,720
Speaker 8: would go to uh Investors Business Daily.

923
00:45:14,840 --> 00:45:18,080
Speaker 5: Oh let's go out. Uh that's we're not going to

924
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:20,400
Speaker 5: go there. I'm we'll keep going straight.

925
00:45:20,400 --> 00:45:22,319
Speaker 8: But if you did go down here take a write,

926
00:45:22,560 --> 00:45:25,160
Speaker 8: you would be at the call center where I worked

927
00:45:25,160 --> 00:45:27,240
Speaker 8: for a couple of years, making less than minimum wage,

928
00:45:27,800 --> 00:45:29,520
Speaker 8: doing you know, a few sets a night of stand

929
00:45:29,600 --> 00:45:33,080
Speaker 8: up sending out packets to late night shows. Just the

930
00:45:33,120 --> 00:45:36,000
Speaker 8: people I worked with lived in their cars. It was

931
00:45:37,200 --> 00:45:38,000
Speaker 8: her misery.

932
00:45:38,200 --> 00:45:40,480
Speaker 2: So you were did you do cold calls? Oh?

933
00:45:40,560 --> 00:45:43,560
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Call I'd say, hi, would you

934
00:45:43,760 --> 00:45:44,040
Speaker 5: like to.

935
00:45:43,960 --> 00:45:48,800
Speaker 8: Subscribe to a garbage newspaper published by Charlotte or morons?

936
00:45:48,960 --> 00:45:50,960
Speaker 8: And people would say, you know, I wouldn't, And I'd say,

937
00:45:50,960 --> 00:45:52,440
Speaker 8: I totally get it, and then hang up and not

938
00:45:52,480 --> 00:45:53,080
Speaker 8: make a nickel.

939
00:45:53,320 --> 00:45:55,960
Speaker 2: Uh, we're paid based on how many people you got

940
00:45:55,960 --> 00:45:58,200
Speaker 2: to sign up? Correct now terrible?

941
00:45:58,400 --> 00:46:02,439
Speaker 8: Yeah I'm not and change years that I worked there,

942
00:46:02,600 --> 00:46:07,440
Speaker 8: I maybe made nine hundred dollars in one week and

943
00:46:08,160 --> 00:46:10,240
Speaker 8: every other week. I mean I'd make like two hundred

944
00:46:10,239 --> 00:46:13,800
Speaker 8: and seven dollars a week. It was uh so gross.

945
00:46:13,880 --> 00:46:18,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, sales does does everyone hate sales the I mean

946
00:46:18,440 --> 00:46:19,440
Speaker 4: the whole time.

947
00:46:19,800 --> 00:46:21,080
Speaker 5: You know, one of them?

948
00:46:21,160 --> 00:46:23,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, exactly, that's exactly it. I don't feel like I

949
00:46:23,160 --> 00:46:24,920
Speaker 2: have the person out The year that I worked at

950
00:46:24,920 --> 00:46:27,279
Speaker 2: the Gap when I was twenty, and it was when

951
00:46:27,320 --> 00:46:29,960
Speaker 2: I first started comedy, I felt like I was dying

952
00:46:30,120 --> 00:46:32,719
Speaker 2: every day I was on that floor, and it inspired

953
00:46:32,719 --> 00:46:36,719
Speaker 2: me to never go back because it was it just

954
00:46:36,880 --> 00:46:39,680
Speaker 2: felt it was like at one point, I remember, I

955
00:46:39,400 --> 00:46:41,960
Speaker 2: eventually quit and I was like waiting to see if

956
00:46:41,960 --> 00:46:43,479
Speaker 2: I was going to move to La So I didn't

957
00:46:43,480 --> 00:46:45,040
Speaker 2: have a job for a little while. My mom called

958
00:46:45,080 --> 00:46:47,000
Speaker 2: me and she was like, do you think you don't

959
00:46:47,080 --> 00:46:49,440
Speaker 2: have to work? And I, for a second I almost

960
00:46:49,480 --> 00:46:51,960
Speaker 2: thought she was sincere. I almost went like, yes, like

961
00:46:52,040 --> 00:46:54,200
Speaker 2: you finally understand me. And I was like, oh, wait, no,

962
00:46:54,239 --> 00:46:55,480
Speaker 2: I have to say no to this question.

963
00:46:55,880 --> 00:46:56,040
Speaker 5: Right.

964
00:46:56,120 --> 00:46:56,680
Speaker 4: Yeah.

965
00:46:57,000 --> 00:47:01,479
Speaker 8: When I left there in twenty ten, which is four

966
00:47:01,560 --> 00:47:06,239
Speaker 8: years ago, you're there was a protocol for quitting where

967
00:47:06,280 --> 00:47:08,040
Speaker 8: you could take like a leave of absence so that

968
00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:10,239
Speaker 8: you could go back there if you wanted to, and

969
00:47:10,280 --> 00:47:12,520
Speaker 8: I made sure to super not observe it. I just

970
00:47:12,600 --> 00:47:14,640
Speaker 8: walked up and never came back, so I wouldn't ever

971
00:47:14,719 --> 00:47:15,800
Speaker 8: be able to work there again.

972
00:47:15,960 --> 00:47:17,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, you brick up that door away.

973
00:47:17,719 --> 00:47:20,880
Speaker 5: Just like no way, And that was it, And I

974
00:47:20,960 --> 00:47:21,399
Speaker 5: love that.

975
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:24,320
Speaker 4: That's that's how you're that you would people would say, no,

976
00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:27,399
Speaker 4: I'm not interested. I understand that. I'm I'm gonna go now.

977
00:47:27,560 --> 00:47:29,400
Speaker 4: That's how I sold Cutco knives.

978
00:47:29,560 --> 00:47:30,040
Speaker 5: I love it.

979
00:47:30,160 --> 00:47:32,879
Speaker 4: I'd walk in. They're very expensive. I would tell them

980
00:47:33,040 --> 00:47:35,640
Speaker 4: that was my opening line. These lines are very these

981
00:47:35,719 --> 00:47:37,839
Speaker 4: knives are very expensive, but they're very good.

982
00:47:38,160 --> 00:47:40,320
Speaker 6: I'm not interested. I totally understand that.

983
00:47:41,040 --> 00:47:43,759
Speaker 4: Very expensive. I mentioned how expensive they were and then

984
00:47:44,840 --> 00:47:48,600
Speaker 4: and I never sold any. I never sold any Awesome.

985
00:47:49,040 --> 00:47:50,640
Speaker 4: I sold some to my dad.

986
00:47:50,760 --> 00:47:53,440
Speaker 8: As far as sales goes, like like what people don't

987
00:47:53,480 --> 00:47:54,360
Speaker 8: need anything?

988
00:47:54,600 --> 00:47:55,800
Speaker 5: You have what you need.

989
00:47:55,960 --> 00:47:58,600
Speaker 8: You know generally, you know you need food, you need shelter,

990
00:47:58,719 --> 00:48:01,120
Speaker 8: need you need to survival, try angle, but beyond that,

991
00:48:01,160 --> 00:48:04,160
Speaker 8: you really need nothing. So to convince people of otherwise,

992
00:48:04,200 --> 00:48:06,840
Speaker 8: you know, it can often be a sin, is what

993
00:48:06,880 --> 00:48:07,160
Speaker 8: I think.

994
00:48:07,200 --> 00:48:09,640
Speaker 5: And that's what I felt like working there. Yeah, that was.

995
00:48:09,640 --> 00:48:12,680
Speaker 2: Sinning well and also when you like, I remember being

996
00:48:12,719 --> 00:48:16,160
Speaker 2: in college and this guy that was selling magazine subscriptions

997
00:48:16,160 --> 00:48:18,840
Speaker 2: door to door did that. First of all, he's super cute.

998
00:48:19,120 --> 00:48:21,680
Speaker 2: He had this whole long conversation with me. He convinced

999
00:48:21,680 --> 00:48:24,200
Speaker 2: me that he would want more subscription to sell before

1000
00:48:24,200 --> 00:48:26,400
Speaker 2: he got his big trip. It was like all of

1001
00:48:26,440 --> 00:48:29,120
Speaker 2: those like Ponzi scheme tricks he used on me, and

1002
00:48:29,160 --> 00:48:31,600
Speaker 2: they worked like a charm and I ended up buying literally,

1003
00:48:31,640 --> 00:48:34,439
Speaker 2: like I think, a four year subscription to Vogue when

1004
00:48:34,480 --> 00:48:37,480
Speaker 2: I had no money, and I remember like when it

1005
00:48:37,520 --> 00:48:40,520
Speaker 2: was over like the next day, going like, oh I

1006
00:48:40,680 --> 00:48:43,919
Speaker 2: just got taken for a ride, Like that's what That's

1007
00:48:43,920 --> 00:48:48,319
Speaker 2: what good sales is. Like, I didn't care about fashion magazine,

1008
00:48:48,680 --> 00:48:49,759
Speaker 2: like nothing in it.

1009
00:48:49,840 --> 00:48:51,239
Speaker 5: Did you keep a touch with you? Or the son

1010
00:48:51,280 --> 00:48:51,960
Speaker 5: that he made with you?

1011
00:48:52,000 --> 00:48:56,719
Speaker 2: Then be married in the fall of ninety nine and

1012
00:48:56,760 --> 00:48:57,239
Speaker 2: now he's.

1013
00:48:57,400 --> 00:49:00,680
Speaker 5: He's been in Costa Rica for.

1014
00:48:59,520 --> 00:49:03,839
Speaker 2: For until the lawyers bring him back. Yeah, that's what

1015
00:49:03,880 --> 00:49:05,879
Speaker 2: it is. It's like you're convincing a person to fall

1016
00:49:05,880 --> 00:49:08,440
Speaker 2: in love with you so that you they take what

1017
00:49:08,480 --> 00:49:10,040
Speaker 2: you have. Look at that guy.

1018
00:49:10,239 --> 00:49:12,839
Speaker 4: Yeah, I've had some really good salesmen come to my door.

1019
00:49:14,040 --> 00:49:17,960
Speaker 4: I've never seen a dog high on marijuana before. I

1020
00:49:18,040 --> 00:49:21,040
Speaker 4: bought a carpet cleaner when I lived in an all

1021
00:49:21,080 --> 00:49:22,360
Speaker 4: wooden floors house once.

1022
00:49:22,480 --> 00:49:23,200
Speaker 5: That's amazing.

1023
00:49:23,320 --> 00:49:25,880
Speaker 4: That's a good salesman. Yeah, it's like, what if you

1024
00:49:25,960 --> 00:49:27,799
Speaker 4: end up buying a rug a throw rug?

1025
00:49:27,840 --> 00:49:29,760
Speaker 5: Good point. Yeah, I might buy a lot of drugs.

1026
00:49:29,920 --> 00:49:33,680
Speaker 4: I might buy some throw rugs, A runner, a runner.

1027
00:49:34,000 --> 00:49:38,560
Speaker 4: I'll just have the concentrate solution. What's that? Thirty five dollars.

1028
00:49:37,440 --> 00:49:39,200
Speaker 6: Best money I've ever spent.

1029
00:49:39,520 --> 00:49:41,040
Speaker 4: Immediate regret when they leave.

1030
00:49:41,880 --> 00:49:43,520
Speaker 2: I had one where I had to call and cancel

1031
00:49:43,560 --> 00:49:47,200
Speaker 2: a check because this guy came into Uh it was.

1032
00:49:47,320 --> 00:49:49,040
Speaker 2: It was when we were working on the pilot for Ellen.

1033
00:49:49,160 --> 00:49:51,680
Speaker 2: He came into the building. I worked in the adults building,

1034
00:49:52,080 --> 00:49:53,800
Speaker 2: So all of a sudden there was a guy standing

1035
00:49:53,880 --> 00:49:56,920
Speaker 2: in my office that I didn't know, Like they looked like,

1036
00:49:57,719 --> 00:50:00,200
Speaker 2: he looks like he worked for Habitat for Humanity is

1037
00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:04,399
Speaker 2: like you know, choker necklace, long hair whatever. He's like, hey,

1038
00:50:04,440 --> 00:50:06,920
Speaker 2: I just I got these deals for this SPA treatment

1039
00:50:07,000 --> 00:50:09,200
Speaker 2: or whatever when I was and I was so it

1040
00:50:09,239 --> 00:50:11,520
Speaker 2: was a total shock and all thing of like and

1041
00:50:11,640 --> 00:50:13,520
Speaker 2: he was like squatting down next to me and telling

1042
00:50:13,560 --> 00:50:16,480
Speaker 2: me about all the like, squatter was real close.

1043
00:50:16,600 --> 00:50:18,439
Speaker 4: I don't like it when waiters do that either.

1044
00:50:19,000 --> 00:50:21,319
Speaker 2: And suddenly I was writing a chew and then he

1045
00:50:21,480 --> 00:50:23,680
Speaker 2: left and I immediately called my bank and I was like,

1046
00:50:23,800 --> 00:50:24,719
Speaker 2: cancel this check.

1047
00:50:24,760 --> 00:50:25,720
Speaker 5: I don't know what just happen.

1048
00:50:26,840 --> 00:50:28,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, you're not to talk to them about it. They're

1049
00:50:28,600 --> 00:50:30,440
Speaker 2: the ones that tricked you. You're just like I changed

1050
00:50:30,440 --> 00:50:32,080
Speaker 2: my mind. I get to change my mind.

1051
00:50:32,239 --> 00:50:34,440
Speaker 4: I'm going to do that with a lot of purchases.

1052
00:50:35,040 --> 00:50:38,680
Speaker 5: You plan to do that? Meal speaking bank?

1053
00:50:38,760 --> 00:50:39,440
Speaker 2: I didn't like it.

1054
00:50:39,640 --> 00:50:40,799
Speaker 4: You do want to go to a bank?

1055
00:50:40,840 --> 00:50:42,680
Speaker 5: I would like that. Yeah, there'll be one coming up

1056
00:50:42,719 --> 00:50:43,040
Speaker 5: on the loft.

1057
00:50:43,080 --> 00:50:44,919
Speaker 4: What do you do your banking with? If you don't

1058
00:50:44,920 --> 00:50:46,600
Speaker 4: mind saying it?

1059
00:50:46,719 --> 00:50:54,920
Speaker 8: Uh, I will, I will just bank?

1060
00:50:56,040 --> 00:50:56,920
Speaker 4: How about it?

1061
00:50:57,280 --> 00:50:58,880
Speaker 2: How about your social Security number?

1062
00:50:59,000 --> 00:51:01,520
Speaker 5: And they're coming up on the left, Well, not quite,

1063
00:51:01,560 --> 00:51:03,319
Speaker 5: I mean a little bit. Okay, Yeah, they have a

1064
00:51:03,320 --> 00:51:04,080
Speaker 5: familiar sign.

1065
00:51:04,280 --> 00:51:06,319
Speaker 6: Just take me to whatever whoever you bank with?

1066
00:51:06,480 --> 00:51:08,080
Speaker 5: Yeah?

1067
00:51:08,120 --> 00:51:10,200
Speaker 6: I currently bank with Wells Fargo.

1068
00:51:10,760 --> 00:51:15,480
Speaker 8: Hey, I have an auto loan from them.

1069
00:51:15,719 --> 00:51:15,919
Speaker 5: Hey.

1070
00:51:16,520 --> 00:51:18,320
Speaker 4: Yeah, they are a sponsor of the podcast.

1071
00:51:18,600 --> 00:51:20,760
Speaker 2: Wells Fargo. Do you like a ton of horses?

1072
00:51:20,840 --> 00:51:26,359
Speaker 4: Wells Fargo, Wells Fargo, We bury your money in the forest.

1073
00:51:28,800 --> 00:51:31,959
Speaker 2: What Oh, I'm looking forward to the Fargo TV show

1074
00:51:32,000 --> 00:51:33,279
Speaker 2: that I just saw billboard for.

1075
00:51:33,560 --> 00:51:37,640
Speaker 8: I want to hear Martin Freeman doing a Fargo access

1076
00:51:37,719 --> 00:51:37,880
Speaker 8: Is that?

1077
00:51:37,880 --> 00:51:38,400
Speaker 2: Who got it?

1078
00:51:38,480 --> 00:51:42,720
Speaker 8: Yeah, Martin Freeman, Billy, Bob Thornton, Colin Hanks.

1079
00:51:44,840 --> 00:51:46,600
Speaker 2: Is there a woman playing the woman sheriff for?

1080
00:51:47,280 --> 00:51:51,320
Speaker 8: I don't know if that is as large a role,

1081
00:51:51,560 --> 00:51:53,360
Speaker 8: And I only only because I saw a trailer and

1082
00:51:53,400 --> 00:51:55,520
Speaker 8: it seemed like it might not have been. But there

1083
00:51:55,520 --> 00:51:58,759
Speaker 8: were women, a bunch of them. They just weren't as

1084
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:00,959
Speaker 8: famous as the general and I've mentioned, so I can't

1085
00:52:01,120 --> 00:52:01,920
Speaker 8: I don't know their names.

1086
00:52:03,080 --> 00:52:07,400
Speaker 2: The TV show, I'm right now. I'm enraged that it's not.

1087
00:52:07,719 --> 00:52:09,200
Speaker 2: Marge is not the lead anymore?

1088
00:52:09,440 --> 00:52:10,359
Speaker 5: Yeah, should be.

1089
00:52:10,520 --> 00:52:12,640
Speaker 2: I just had it. That was a one eating I

1090
00:52:12,760 --> 00:52:15,440
Speaker 2: was excited. No, not now I'm going to camp Maybe.

1091
00:52:15,760 --> 00:52:17,480
Speaker 8: Well, you know what, Maybe it is, but maybe their

1092
00:52:17,640 --> 00:52:20,120
Speaker 8: sexist in their advertising. For example, I was just in

1093
00:52:20,200 --> 00:52:24,040
Speaker 8: England and they had the monuments Men. Hey, guess what

1094
00:52:24,160 --> 00:52:26,840
Speaker 8: Kate Blanchette is in. That wouldn't have known from posters

1095
00:52:26,840 --> 00:52:29,080
Speaker 8: in the US, but she's in all the posters in

1096
00:52:29,120 --> 00:52:31,000
Speaker 8: the UK.

1097
00:52:31,120 --> 00:52:32,160
Speaker 5: Then there's another movie.

1098
00:52:32,360 --> 00:52:36,000
Speaker 8: Uh, that called that awkward moment with Zach Afron and

1099
00:52:36,040 --> 00:52:38,920
Speaker 8: some other folks. Sure, and there is a lead female

1100
00:52:38,960 --> 00:52:41,520
Speaker 8: in that, but not on the posters here but in England,

1101
00:52:41,600 --> 00:52:44,680
Speaker 8: so maybe they want to rope you in and uh

1102
00:52:44,719 --> 00:52:47,479
Speaker 8: then when you're watching.

1103
00:52:45,840 --> 00:52:49,560
Speaker 2: That's match up with like the sex cells attitude of like, whoop,

1104
00:52:50,480 --> 00:52:54,520
Speaker 2: what's the what's the drawback of gorgeous? Kate Blanchette doesn't make.

1105
00:52:54,440 --> 00:52:57,640
Speaker 8: A long she's not playing herself because snooze areny male.

1106
00:52:58,480 --> 00:53:00,000
Speaker 2: It's such a every time you've hung out.

1107
00:53:01,440 --> 00:53:02,840
Speaker 5: She's one of those people who like it.

1108
00:53:02,920 --> 00:53:06,120
Speaker 8: Talks about like the majesty of acting interviews.

1109
00:53:06,200 --> 00:53:08,520
Speaker 5: So she's just a big bummercade. If you're listening, turn

1110
00:53:08,680 --> 00:53:10,200
Speaker 5: turn it off. I don't want to Kate.

1111
00:53:11,280 --> 00:53:12,840
Speaker 2: I love your skin creams.

1112
00:53:12,920 --> 00:53:15,879
Speaker 5: Yeah. No, she's amazing and beautiful. She kind of my wife,

1113
00:53:15,920 --> 00:53:16,600
Speaker 5: kind of looks like Kate.

1114
00:53:16,680 --> 00:53:20,880
Speaker 8: Like if Kate Blanchett, Tilda Swinton and Jodie Foster somehow

1115
00:53:21,120 --> 00:53:23,120
Speaker 8: were able with each other, that's sort of what she

1116
00:53:23,120 --> 00:53:23,400
Speaker 8: looks like.

1117
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:24,319
Speaker 2: When did you meet her?

1118
00:53:25,000 --> 00:53:25,400
Speaker 5: I met her.

1119
00:53:25,440 --> 00:53:27,879
Speaker 8: I met her at a camp for people with disabilities.

1120
00:53:27,960 --> 00:53:31,600
Speaker 8: She's not disabled, but we were both counselors for people

1121
00:53:31,600 --> 00:53:32,719
Speaker 8: with cerebral palsy.

1122
00:53:32,480 --> 00:53:34,240
Speaker 4: And that's where I trolled for days ago.

1123
00:53:34,520 --> 00:53:35,960
Speaker 5: You should, I'll tell you why.

1124
00:53:36,000 --> 00:53:38,799
Speaker 8: Because those people, you know, people who volunteer, they can

1125
00:53:38,880 --> 00:53:42,239
Speaker 8: like do selfless stuff, right, right, true?

1126
00:53:42,480 --> 00:53:45,640
Speaker 4: Right? Speaking of there's someone I don't like, how there's

1127
00:53:45,640 --> 00:53:47,160
Speaker 4: a lady sitting on the sidewalk.

1128
00:53:47,239 --> 00:53:49,640
Speaker 6: Well, we've already driven past, so.

1129
00:53:49,640 --> 00:53:51,000
Speaker 2: We can't get nothing I can do.

1130
00:53:51,080 --> 00:53:54,560
Speaker 5: We're trying to postcasts there. Yeah, cops have already got

1131
00:53:54,560 --> 00:53:55,640
Speaker 5: So what.

1132
00:53:55,520 --> 00:53:56,840
Speaker 4: Am I gonna do that they can't?

1133
00:53:57,120 --> 00:53:57,319
Speaker 2: You know?

1134
00:53:57,360 --> 00:54:02,160
Speaker 8: What's so funny about give a ship that help her,

1135
00:54:02,880 --> 00:54:05,200
Speaker 8: not assault, not take her right away from her.

1136
00:54:05,160 --> 00:54:06,759
Speaker 4: Not have shooting them be a plan B.

1137
00:54:09,560 --> 00:54:12,400
Speaker 2: What if that wasn't cops and it was the masade.

1138
00:54:12,600 --> 00:54:13,879
Speaker 2: I don't know if I'm pronouncing.

1139
00:54:13,560 --> 00:54:16,080
Speaker 5: That sounded good to me. I'm not Hebrew.

1140
00:54:16,640 --> 00:54:20,600
Speaker 2: What's funny about that is that the opposite I've always done,

1141
00:54:20,600 --> 00:54:24,040
Speaker 2: the opposite, which is date comedians, who are probably the

1142
00:54:24,360 --> 00:54:28,400
Speaker 2: exact polar opposite of people that volunteer at camps for

1143
00:54:28,600 --> 00:54:29,799
Speaker 2: disabled people.

1144
00:54:29,840 --> 00:54:31,919
Speaker 8: In many cases they are I mean, like a really

1145
00:54:32,000 --> 00:54:35,279
Speaker 8: good one might not be, you know, because isn't that weird?

1146
00:54:35,320 --> 00:54:37,400
Speaker 8: You know, like you know somebody who's like really as

1147
00:54:37,440 --> 00:54:40,200
Speaker 8: successful as a comedian and enjoying themselves, there's a there

1148
00:54:40,320 --> 00:54:41,919
Speaker 8: might be a higher likelihood that they're a good person.

1149
00:54:42,080 --> 00:54:46,759
Speaker 5: Yes, fucking trenches, comedians scumback.

1150
00:54:48,520 --> 00:54:50,600
Speaker 2: Well, I guess you'd be that example, because you did it.

1151
00:54:51,320 --> 00:54:51,560
Speaker 5: Well.

1152
00:54:51,600 --> 00:54:53,640
Speaker 8: You know the reason I did it is because everybody

1153
00:54:53,640 --> 00:54:57,120
Speaker 8: when I was in the hospital and in rehab and

1154
00:54:57,120 --> 00:55:00,160
Speaker 8: then in a halfway home when this was in two

1155
00:55:00,239 --> 00:55:03,359
Speaker 8: thousand and two, twelve years ago.

1156
00:55:03,160 --> 00:55:04,319
Speaker 5: Right, people were just so great.

1157
00:55:04,320 --> 00:55:07,080
Speaker 8: There were so many volunteers in the hospital doing something

1158
00:55:07,080 --> 00:55:09,560
Speaker 8: in addition to the doctors and nurses that I was like,

1159
00:55:09,960 --> 00:55:12,360
Speaker 8: once I kind of got released, I was still like

1160
00:55:12,520 --> 00:55:16,719
Speaker 8: emaciated and totally unemployable. So I was like, oh, I

1161
00:55:16,760 --> 00:55:19,960
Speaker 8: could volunteer, and I did, and I just found it.

1162
00:55:20,080 --> 00:55:21,800
Speaker 8: I enjoyed it a lot. So I think the secret

1163
00:55:22,000 --> 00:55:23,880
Speaker 8: about volunteering that a lot of people might not know

1164
00:55:24,000 --> 00:55:27,560
Speaker 8: is it's super fun. And I know I demand.

1165
00:55:27,280 --> 00:55:29,960
Speaker 5: To have fun because I'm a comedian and an alcoholic, Like,

1166
00:55:30,080 --> 00:55:31,080
Speaker 5: I know what fun is.

1167
00:55:31,280 --> 00:55:33,799
Speaker 8: Yeah, I swear to God volunteering is really really fun,

1168
00:55:33,880 --> 00:55:36,400
Speaker 8: or I wouldn't do it because I remain deeply selfish.

1169
00:55:36,640 --> 00:55:40,080
Speaker 6: Yes, a lot of people what they don't know about bands.

1170
00:55:40,120 --> 00:55:44,200
Speaker 4: I used to be a youth group leader person, but

1171
00:55:44,280 --> 00:55:47,160
Speaker 4: I wasn't a religious person at all, but they didn't

1172
00:55:47,200 --> 00:55:50,600
Speaker 4: seem to care about that. I actually was raised sort

1173
00:55:50,640 --> 00:55:53,839
Speaker 4: of atheist, but I it was that feeling of we'd

1174
00:55:53,840 --> 00:55:58,160
Speaker 4: go on these trips and do things. And I'm not bragging,

1175
00:55:58,160 --> 00:56:00,359
Speaker 4: but it was very it felt really good. Right, Yeah,

1176
00:56:00,360 --> 00:56:03,120
Speaker 4: you go to Mexico building part of a sidewalk, do

1177
00:56:03,160 --> 00:56:05,200
Speaker 4: a poor job because we didn't know what we were doing.

1178
00:56:10,880 --> 00:56:13,480
Speaker 6: It's hard to it's I was because I was talking.

1179
00:56:14,080 --> 00:56:16,720
Speaker 5: A great story. So I'll be back in a flash.

1180
00:56:16,840 --> 00:56:21,040
Speaker 4: Okay, we'll be uh right here. Getting a ticket because

1181
00:56:21,040 --> 00:56:22,960
Speaker 4: I'm in the handicapped area.

1182
00:56:23,400 --> 00:56:24,680
Speaker 5: Not my problem.

1183
00:56:24,719 --> 00:56:26,640
Speaker 4: I think that means. Or it's a picture of a

1184
00:56:26,680 --> 00:56:30,240
Speaker 4: person with a big round but that's a logo.

1185
00:56:30,320 --> 00:56:31,960
Speaker 2: Bit Oh I get him?

1186
00:56:32,160 --> 00:56:37,000
Speaker 4: Yeah, thanks, it's your phone? Or did someone leave this? Well,

1187
00:56:37,040 --> 00:56:39,120
Speaker 4: now that he's gone, what do you think of this

1188
00:56:39,200 --> 00:56:40,080
Speaker 4: rub Delaney guy.

1189
00:56:40,200 --> 00:56:43,000
Speaker 2: Let's talk about our first guest in a like we're

1190
00:56:43,000 --> 00:56:43,960
Speaker 2: going to review him.

1191
00:56:44,239 --> 00:56:48,759
Speaker 4: Yeah, he's been he's calming, he was, it's been a

1192
00:56:48,920 --> 00:56:51,480
Speaker 4: he's been added a nice element of calm.

1193
00:56:51,880 --> 00:56:54,120
Speaker 2: I liked that he was handed this one of these

1194
00:56:54,200 --> 00:56:58,120
Speaker 2: huge microphones and immediately started playing podcast ball with us

1195
00:56:58,160 --> 00:57:00,640
Speaker 2: the second he got into the car. Oh yeah, yeah,

1196
00:57:00,719 --> 00:57:02,600
Speaker 2: there was no like kid. I mean, he did have

1197
00:57:02,640 --> 00:57:04,759
Speaker 2: to give us private information that we'll edit out, but

1198
00:57:06,600 --> 00:57:09,000
Speaker 2: I liked that part his game. He gets it.

1199
00:57:09,160 --> 00:57:09,359
Speaker 4: Yeah.

1200
00:57:09,520 --> 00:57:11,080
Speaker 2: Sure, he's taken improv classes.

1201
00:57:11,320 --> 00:57:14,719
Speaker 6: He has done nothing but yes, and this whole time.

1202
00:57:14,800 --> 00:57:16,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think that's we have to really keep an

1203
00:57:16,960 --> 00:57:17,920
Speaker 2: eye out for those people.

1204
00:57:18,680 --> 00:57:21,720
Speaker 4: But he has. It has been just yes and do

1205
00:57:21,760 --> 00:57:23,320
Speaker 4: you have anything funny to say?

1206
00:57:24,760 --> 00:57:26,520
Speaker 2: Yes? And beat this riff?

1207
00:57:26,680 --> 00:57:28,800
Speaker 4: I'm going to get out. I'm starting to feel bad

1208
00:57:28,840 --> 00:57:33,080
Speaker 4: that I'm in a handicapped good spot right next to it.

1209
00:57:33,200 --> 00:57:35,800
Speaker 6: Oh that guy, Look at that guy.

1210
00:57:36,880 --> 00:57:40,520
Speaker 4: I like always at LEAs are really goodies.

1211
00:57:41,360 --> 00:57:42,920
Speaker 2: You say you like them, but then you take their

1212
00:57:43,000 --> 00:57:43,760
Speaker 2: parking spots.

1213
00:57:44,120 --> 00:57:49,200
Speaker 4: Yeah, well, not all old people are handicapped, Karen. I mean,

1214
00:57:49,480 --> 00:57:50,600
Speaker 4: let's be realistic.

1215
00:57:52,160 --> 00:57:54,400
Speaker 2: They take a lot of our government money.

1216
00:57:54,560 --> 00:57:56,880
Speaker 4: Wouldn't it be funny if I was in there, he

1217
00:57:57,000 --> 00:57:59,840
Speaker 4: was just working out some home loan thing. That's something

1218
00:58:00,280 --> 00:58:00,960
Speaker 4: like two hours.

1219
00:58:02,040 --> 00:58:06,000
Speaker 2: It's just like real quick, I have to refinance my mortgage.

1220
00:58:05,680 --> 00:58:08,000
Speaker 4: Took all my assets and put it in a Swiss

1221
00:58:08,040 --> 00:58:08,920
Speaker 4: floating island.

1222
00:58:14,880 --> 00:58:17,200
Speaker 5: I'm back. Yay my team.

1223
00:58:17,600 --> 00:58:19,080
Speaker 2: Hi. Do you have a ton of money now?

1224
00:58:19,600 --> 00:58:22,880
Speaker 5: I mean I have enough to get me through the

1225
00:58:22,920 --> 00:58:26,640
Speaker 5: next week? Okay, great, so yes, that's a ton to me.

1226
00:58:26,800 --> 00:58:27,919
Speaker 2: In the big scheme of things.

1227
00:58:27,960 --> 00:58:30,200
Speaker 5: Can I go? If you took a left here, it

1228
00:58:30,320 --> 00:58:32,600
Speaker 5: probably wouldn't be Oh.

1229
00:58:34,520 --> 00:58:36,360
Speaker 4: Oh, if I took a left here, it would take

1230
00:58:36,800 --> 00:58:38,320
Speaker 4: add thirty years start driving.

1231
00:58:38,920 --> 00:58:39,400
Speaker 5: I don't care.

1232
00:58:39,440 --> 00:58:41,400
Speaker 6: Well, you haven't seen daddy be aggressive.

1233
00:58:41,560 --> 00:58:44,320
Speaker 4: I just poke the nose out and make furious eye

1234
00:58:44,320 --> 00:58:46,160
Speaker 4: contact and.

1235
00:58:46,400 --> 00:58:48,640
Speaker 8: See that gym across the street. Can you even imagine

1236
00:58:48,680 --> 00:58:53,400
Speaker 8: being like, yeah, I'll go there to work out? Like yeah,

1237
00:58:53,400 --> 00:58:55,640
Speaker 8: I mean, nothing wrong with it. It's just like exactly

1238
00:58:55,920 --> 00:58:58,360
Speaker 8: not where I would ever go to work out.

1239
00:58:58,640 --> 00:59:03,000
Speaker 4: No, I don't want to be in between two alleyways.

1240
00:59:03,280 --> 00:59:06,960
Speaker 5: On a hot sort of one of the boring areas

1241
00:59:06,960 --> 00:59:07,360
Speaker 5: of l A.

1242
00:59:07,640 --> 00:59:09,840
Speaker 4: Do you want my inside of my car to be

1243
00:59:09,880 --> 00:59:10,360
Speaker 4: any hotter?

1244
00:59:10,880 --> 00:59:11,520
Speaker 5: Is it possible to?

1245
00:59:12,320 --> 00:59:13,200
Speaker 4: It's weird.

1246
00:59:13,520 --> 00:59:16,560
Speaker 5: I'm yoga pants without moving.

1247
00:59:17,800 --> 00:59:21,080
Speaker 2: Well, I have a total stripe of sweat.

1248
00:59:21,320 --> 00:59:24,120
Speaker 4: I'm going to rename our podcast trouser Soup.

1249
00:59:25,200 --> 00:59:27,040
Speaker 5: I think black swamp.

1250
00:59:27,280 --> 00:59:30,120
Speaker 6: You know what I might?

1251
00:59:30,480 --> 00:59:31,960
Speaker 4: I might take a bow out.

1252
00:59:33,880 --> 00:59:35,880
Speaker 8: That's fine, I mean if you're you know how all

1253
00:59:35,960 --> 00:59:38,200
Speaker 8: this becks crap over here works?

1254
00:59:38,400 --> 00:59:38,600
Speaker 5: Yeah?

1255
00:59:38,720 --> 00:59:42,760
Speaker 8: Yeah, this will be the part that they highlight for

1256
00:59:43,040 --> 00:59:46,920
Speaker 8: for the Podcast Awards.

1257
00:59:47,720 --> 00:59:50,480
Speaker 4: It's funny. Yeah, there there is a lot of specific

1258
00:59:50,560 --> 00:59:52,960
Speaker 4: traffic moments that.

1259
00:59:52,560 --> 00:59:54,720
Speaker 5: This is real. I mean, look, people want to know that.

1260
00:59:54,760 --> 00:59:57,000
Speaker 8: People often ask me, what's alike when you hang out

1261
00:59:57,000 --> 00:59:59,320
Speaker 8: with Karen Kilgriffer, what's alike when hanging with Chris Fabets Now?

1262
00:59:59,320 --> 01:00:01,240
Speaker 8: You know, so I don't want to hear people complaining

1263
01:00:01,480 --> 01:00:03,680
Speaker 8: just because we give you the gold, we also don't

1264
01:00:03,680 --> 01:00:04,120
Speaker 8: give you a.

1265
01:00:04,040 --> 01:00:08,560
Speaker 2: Little track, a little reality, a little boring, hot, sweaty reality.

1266
01:00:08,880 --> 01:00:13,040
Speaker 4: Yep, real specific traffic stuff, none of the visuals.

1267
01:00:13,600 --> 01:00:13,800
Speaker 5: Right.

1268
01:00:13,840 --> 01:00:17,240
Speaker 8: Oh here, I have a fun story for you. In Pittsburgh,

1269
01:00:17,480 --> 01:00:20,640
Speaker 8: I got in the elevator the morning after my show,

1270
01:00:20,680 --> 01:00:22,840
Speaker 8: getting ready to get on a little plane to Philadelphia,

1271
01:00:23,200 --> 01:00:24,840
Speaker 8: and so I just was, you know, out of it,

1272
01:00:24,880 --> 01:00:25,520
Speaker 8: and I got on the.

1273
01:00:25,440 --> 01:00:26,480
Speaker 5: Elevator and when I was on.

1274
01:00:26,440 --> 01:00:28,800
Speaker 8: There, I howked up a big lookie because then nobody

1275
01:00:28,880 --> 01:00:31,120
Speaker 8: was there. So I was like, like really worked at

1276
01:00:31,160 --> 01:00:33,320
Speaker 8: it and closed my eyes. And then I opened my

1277
01:00:33,320 --> 01:00:35,520
Speaker 8: eyes and the doors were opening, and a beautiful young

1278
01:00:35,520 --> 01:00:38,440
Speaker 8: woman walked on the elevator and looked at me and goes, hey,

1279
01:00:38,480 --> 01:00:39,520
Speaker 8: great show last night.

1280
01:00:40,080 --> 01:00:45,760
Speaker 4: And she saw you spit the lookie without a doubt.

1281
01:00:45,920 --> 01:00:46,600
Speaker 5: No, she saw me.

1282
01:00:46,760 --> 01:00:48,760
Speaker 8: Just deal with it. I didn't spit. I just swallowed

1283
01:00:48,800 --> 01:00:50,120
Speaker 8: it because we were in an elevator.

1284
01:00:51,080 --> 01:00:53,040
Speaker 2: And then you said thank you in a loogie. Bubble

1285
01:00:53,080 --> 01:00:53,919
Speaker 2: came out of her mouth.

1286
01:00:54,240 --> 01:00:55,840
Speaker 5: Yeah, but it's a nice cause shout.

1287
01:00:55,920 --> 01:00:57,880
Speaker 8: Now she knows in real life that I'm a little

1288
01:00:57,880 --> 01:00:59,920
Speaker 8: more disgusting than I am on stage.

1289
01:01:00,640 --> 01:01:01,400
Speaker 2: Imagine that.

1290
01:01:01,880 --> 01:01:03,960
Speaker 4: What I like to do if someone catches you is

1291
01:01:04,000 --> 01:01:06,560
Speaker 4: you just keep making that noise as if it's just

1292
01:01:06,600 --> 01:01:07,240
Speaker 4: a noise you.

1293
01:01:07,200 --> 01:01:10,960
Speaker 5: Make, they're not making one.

1294
01:01:11,360 --> 01:01:13,120
Speaker 2: Can I just say that. I don't know why, but

1295
01:01:13,160 --> 01:01:15,600
Speaker 2: it just popped into my head. I've known you for

1296
01:01:15,640 --> 01:01:17,840
Speaker 2: a while, I feel like. And one of my favorite

1297
01:01:17,880 --> 01:01:20,560
Speaker 2: sets that I ever watched you do was that night

1298
01:01:20,600 --> 01:01:23,960
Speaker 2: at Acbar, which is a tiny it's a bar in

1299
01:01:24,040 --> 01:01:26,680
Speaker 2: Silver Lake, and I think it's I think it's predominantly

1300
01:01:26,680 --> 01:01:28,920
Speaker 2: a gay bar. It's been gay en Street, but the

1301
01:01:28,960 --> 01:01:31,960
Speaker 2: show is run by our friend Bruce, so it's kind

1302
01:01:31,960 --> 01:01:35,440
Speaker 2: of mostly a gay shows.

1303
01:01:35,560 --> 01:01:36,240
Speaker 4: It's a gay bar.

1304
01:01:36,320 --> 01:01:37,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, that's how you know.

1305
01:01:38,360 --> 01:01:40,320
Speaker 5: But anyway, also the way he kisses.

1306
01:01:41,600 --> 01:01:43,600
Speaker 4: Wait a minute, that was my mouth.

1307
01:01:43,760 --> 01:01:46,480
Speaker 2: Rob did a set and I'd seen him. We were

1308
01:01:46,640 --> 01:01:49,120
Speaker 2: we did shows at Largo together, like we we done

1309
01:01:49,160 --> 01:01:52,439
Speaker 2: some shows together, but you were doing your usual set

1310
01:01:52,640 --> 01:01:55,160
Speaker 2: and those lesbians it was mostly lesbians in the audience

1311
01:01:55,200 --> 01:01:59,840
Speaker 2: that night, and they were really like not having you

1312
01:02:00,320 --> 01:02:03,800
Speaker 2: in a way, and I started getting nervous for you,

1313
01:02:04,160 --> 01:02:07,320
Speaker 2: and you in your classic rubbed Laney way, instead of

1314
01:02:07,400 --> 01:02:09,600
Speaker 2: getting nervous yourself in any way that I could see,

1315
01:02:09,960 --> 01:02:13,400
Speaker 2: doubled down and just like put your foot up on

1316
01:02:13,440 --> 01:02:16,880
Speaker 2: a stool and got down into the audience and you

1317
01:02:16,920 --> 01:02:19,560
Speaker 2: were telling your like come out into my van jokes

1318
01:02:19,600 --> 01:02:23,320
Speaker 2: into their face, and me and Paige herwitz Is in

1319
01:02:23,360 --> 01:02:26,760
Speaker 2: the back were crying laughing. It was like it was

1320
01:02:26,840 --> 01:02:28,760
Speaker 2: like the way you were acting was as if you

1321
01:02:28,800 --> 01:02:31,000
Speaker 2: were destroying and you just wanted to be out among

1322
01:02:31,000 --> 01:02:34,480
Speaker 2: your people like Dean Martin oh so, and people were

1323
01:02:34,640 --> 01:02:37,840
Speaker 2: like like, oh, like they were being like bitchy lesbians

1324
01:02:37,840 --> 01:02:40,520
Speaker 2: about It was so funny. It was one of my favorites.

1325
01:02:40,600 --> 01:02:42,760
Speaker 5: Thank you. Yeah, that can be fun sometimes.

1326
01:02:42,480 --> 01:02:45,160
Speaker 4: Sometimes when dayling's with a group of lesbians. Yeah, you

1327
01:02:45,280 --> 01:02:47,640
Speaker 4: just got to take a knee and hunker down.

1328
01:02:47,720 --> 01:02:49,439
Speaker 5: That's right. See, this is who I am.

1329
01:02:49,480 --> 01:02:52,400
Speaker 4: It's not the first time I've said that. There's a

1330
01:02:52,480 --> 01:02:55,360
Speaker 4: time that and we've shared this before, Rob and and

1331
01:02:55,440 --> 01:03:01,080
Speaker 4: other even televised moments where I apparently and I don't

1332
01:03:01,200 --> 01:03:04,040
Speaker 4: fully recall it, but you were. You brought me up

1333
01:03:04,040 --> 01:03:06,800
Speaker 4: at a show. And what did I say? I said

1334
01:03:06,840 --> 01:03:11,840
Speaker 4: something that could be it could be misconstrued as rude.

1335
01:03:12,160 --> 01:03:14,080
Speaker 4: Didn't I say, shut the fuck up and sit down?

1336
01:03:15,400 --> 01:03:18,200
Speaker 4: What was it? What did I do? It doesn't sound like.

1337
01:03:18,240 --> 01:03:21,680
Speaker 8: Me, remember, I mean, no, it wasn't it was. You

1338
01:03:21,920 --> 01:03:25,560
Speaker 8: knew that it was funny enough you said that an

1339
01:03:25,600 --> 01:03:29,920
Speaker 8: implicitly mean thing, but it was so funny that it

1340
01:03:29,960 --> 01:03:30,400
Speaker 8: was okay.

1341
01:03:30,560 --> 01:03:32,160
Speaker 4: You knew that I was kidding. Knew that you were

1342
01:03:32,200 --> 01:03:34,480
Speaker 4: kidding because I've heard a recalling, Oh you know what

1343
01:03:34,520 --> 01:03:34,800
Speaker 4: it was.

1344
01:03:34,920 --> 01:03:35,320
Speaker 5: I was.

1345
01:03:35,480 --> 01:03:37,600
Speaker 8: I was introducing you, and I was I said a

1346
01:03:37,600 --> 01:03:40,400
Speaker 8: few nice things about you, and uh, you know, the

1347
01:03:40,520 --> 01:03:42,720
Speaker 8: things that you've done and things that I thought enjoyed

1348
01:03:42,840 --> 01:03:43,919
Speaker 8: and uh, and then.

1349
01:03:43,840 --> 01:03:45,240
Speaker 5: You just came up and took the microwave from like,

1350
01:03:45,280 --> 01:03:46,480
Speaker 5: shut the fuck up and get out of here.

1351
01:03:47,320 --> 01:03:51,080
Speaker 4: So clearly I was kidding. Yes, I've heard you tell

1352
01:03:51,120 --> 01:03:53,560
Speaker 4: the story, and I was like, well, that's the story

1353
01:03:53,680 --> 01:03:55,920
Speaker 4: of an asshole. I'm starting.

1354
01:03:56,200 --> 01:03:58,000
Speaker 5: It was a story of a funny ass.

1355
01:03:57,920 --> 01:04:01,160
Speaker 4: Okay, so that no part of you thought, wow, that

1356
01:04:01,240 --> 01:04:04,480
Speaker 4: Chris Fairbanks abrasive little.

1357
01:04:04,240 --> 01:04:05,400
Speaker 5: Man, didn't it all?

1358
01:04:05,480 --> 01:04:07,440
Speaker 8: Because also, I'm one of those people who has the

1359
01:04:07,520 --> 01:04:10,240
Speaker 8: sickness enough that like, if I have to get harmed

1360
01:04:10,320 --> 01:04:12,240
Speaker 8: or my feelings have to get hurt for other people

1361
01:04:12,280 --> 01:04:13,520
Speaker 8: to laugh, I'm like, we'll do it.

1362
01:04:13,520 --> 01:04:14,840
Speaker 5: I mean, it's more important.

1363
01:04:15,200 --> 01:04:16,320
Speaker 4: It was an example of that.

1364
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:19,640
Speaker 2: I love rudeness comedy, I think the most, and I

1365
01:04:19,680 --> 01:04:21,720
Speaker 2: feel like I've been doing it all my life and

1366
01:04:21,800 --> 01:04:23,800
Speaker 2: maybe twenty five percent of the people I've shared it

1367
01:04:23,840 --> 01:04:26,120
Speaker 2: with actually understand what I'm doing. Yeah, and most of

1368
01:04:26,160 --> 01:04:29,040
Speaker 2: them just were taking me at face value of like

1369
01:04:29,080 --> 01:04:31,200
Speaker 2: what a crazy bitch? Where is it like? And I

1370
01:04:31,280 --> 01:04:33,960
Speaker 2: understand that makes sense because that is what I was doing,

1371
01:04:34,240 --> 01:04:36,120
Speaker 2: except for if you have that. I think that's why

1372
01:04:36,160 --> 01:04:38,560
Speaker 2: I get along with like drag queens so well, because

1373
01:04:38,560 --> 01:04:40,720
Speaker 2: it's that kind of like slap someone in the face

1374
01:04:40,760 --> 01:04:43,520
Speaker 2: purely because you can idea that's.

1375
01:04:43,280 --> 01:04:44,960
Speaker 5: Funny to me, real joy.

1376
01:04:45,120 --> 01:04:48,360
Speaker 8: Although last night there was I was being interviewed by

1377
01:04:48,360 --> 01:04:50,000
Speaker 8: a newspaper before my show, and the guy came and

1378
01:04:50,040 --> 01:04:52,640
Speaker 8: he was young, and I was eating. I had two

1379
01:04:52,720 --> 01:04:55,080
Speaker 8: slices of pizza on one plate and was taking a fight.

1380
01:04:55,120 --> 01:04:56,560
Speaker 8: When you walk in, he goes, what do you got?

1381
01:04:56,600 --> 01:04:57,320
Speaker 8: What was that you got?

1382
01:04:57,320 --> 01:05:00,000
Speaker 5: There? Some pizza? And I said, no, it's a cheeseburger.

1383
01:05:00,400 --> 01:05:04,680
Speaker 8: And I could tell that it may he wanted to cry.

1384
01:05:04,720 --> 01:05:06,000
Speaker 5: But what are you gonna do?

1385
01:05:06,280 --> 01:05:08,360
Speaker 2: It makes you not want to hang out with normal people.

1386
01:05:08,880 --> 01:05:10,040
Speaker 2: That's kind of how it is for me.

1387
01:05:10,320 --> 01:05:13,160
Speaker 4: It is it is the proper response to the dumbest

1388
01:05:13,240 --> 01:05:14,760
Speaker 4: question ever, though I.

1389
01:05:15,200 --> 01:05:17,600
Speaker 5: Think it is, but what are you doing?

1390
01:05:17,640 --> 01:05:19,880
Speaker 2: The thing you're doing?

1391
01:05:19,200 --> 01:05:23,600
Speaker 5: You use your kating the whole deal tongue involved.

1392
01:05:23,800 --> 01:05:25,640
Speaker 2: Now, when you go on the road, do you get

1393
01:05:26,800 --> 01:05:30,000
Speaker 2: like lonely? Do you have like are those moments like that?

1394
01:05:30,040 --> 01:05:32,720
Speaker 2: Do you think maybe after a while, maybe they build

1395
01:05:32,760 --> 01:05:34,720
Speaker 2: up where like you have to do comedy and then

1396
01:05:34,720 --> 01:05:36,560
Speaker 2: you're by yourself and you have to talk to press

1397
01:05:36,600 --> 01:05:39,240
Speaker 2: and then you're by yourself or whatever that maybe there's

1398
01:05:39,240 --> 01:05:41,120
Speaker 2: an anti social thing that becomes built in.

1399
01:05:42,680 --> 01:05:45,880
Speaker 8: I probably not. I mean I generally air towards niceness.

1400
01:05:45,920 --> 01:05:47,920
Speaker 8: I really, in fact, do try to be nice to

1401
01:05:48,360 --> 01:05:52,680
Speaker 8: just about everybody. But yeah, I mean I can get lonely.

1402
01:05:53,280 --> 01:05:55,520
Speaker 8: This trip was so crazy because it was just constant.

1403
01:05:55,800 --> 01:05:57,640
Speaker 8: I was either in a plane or on a stage.

1404
01:05:58,240 --> 01:05:59,840
Speaker 8: Time to get lonely.

1405
01:06:00,600 --> 01:06:01,440
Speaker 5: But it's happened.

1406
01:06:01,480 --> 01:06:04,280
Speaker 8: Like I just did a month in London and in

1407
01:06:04,320 --> 01:06:06,880
Speaker 8: the middle of it, I was like, I very sincerely

1408
01:06:06,880 --> 01:06:08,120
Speaker 8: hope I get hit by a double decker.

1409
01:06:08,120 --> 01:06:08,640
Speaker 5: Boss.

1410
01:06:09,560 --> 01:06:11,480
Speaker 2: Well, because you miss your kids so much, probably right

1411
01:06:11,520 --> 01:06:13,040
Speaker 2: in your family, and it's.

1412
01:06:13,360 --> 01:06:14,120
Speaker 5: I won't do it again.

1413
01:06:14,240 --> 01:06:17,800
Speaker 4: I think. I don't think I drank much before I

1414
01:06:17,800 --> 01:06:21,240
Speaker 4: did stand up and after a show, the idea of

1415
01:06:21,600 --> 01:06:24,840
Speaker 4: just okay, there was there's my show, I did my job.

1416
01:06:25,120 --> 01:06:28,439
Speaker 4: Let me go back to the hotel room and stare

1417
01:06:28,440 --> 01:06:30,640
Speaker 4: at the wall or the TV and look at emails.

1418
01:06:30,680 --> 01:06:31,760
Speaker 6: That depresses me.

1419
01:06:32,200 --> 01:06:36,200
Speaker 4: But the result is I end up having whiskeys after

1420
01:06:36,200 --> 01:06:38,160
Speaker 4: the show, and so I don't want to do that anymore.

1421
01:06:38,640 --> 01:06:39,560
Speaker 4: That makes you die.

1422
01:06:39,880 --> 01:06:42,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, Well, and also it's just a depressant. It like

1423
01:06:42,320 --> 01:06:43,800
Speaker 2: just will bring you further down if you don't.

1424
01:06:43,960 --> 01:06:46,760
Speaker 6: Alcohol is a depress it's a depressed so barbituate.

1425
01:06:47,040 --> 01:06:48,600
Speaker 8: Yeah, and you know what this is going to sound

1426
01:06:48,720 --> 01:06:51,480
Speaker 8: kind of elementary and stupid, but it took me years

1427
01:06:51,520 --> 01:06:54,640
Speaker 8: to do. But now after years, now I finally will

1428
01:06:54,640 --> 01:06:56,800
Speaker 8: go back to my hotel room and read a book.

1429
01:06:57,400 --> 01:07:00,400
Speaker 5: Right is like, I'm like, who invent this?

1430
01:07:00,680 --> 01:07:01,440
Speaker 4: That's what I should.

1431
01:07:01,720 --> 01:07:04,160
Speaker 2: It's a lot of fun, you know, it's super weird

1432
01:07:04,200 --> 01:07:07,760
Speaker 2: and not I'm not against reading. But last night I

1433
01:07:07,800 --> 01:07:10,200
Speaker 2: came home from work and I was so tired and

1434
01:07:10,280 --> 01:07:12,440
Speaker 2: so like I just always lay on my couch and

1435
01:07:12,480 --> 01:07:16,760
Speaker 2: watch TV and then and then fall asleep.

1436
01:07:17,040 --> 01:07:21,360
Speaker 8: Okay, I'm gonna it's okay, we can do another right.

1437
01:07:22,120 --> 01:07:24,800
Speaker 4: Let's do another right. No one knows where we are

1438
01:07:24,880 --> 01:07:25,600
Speaker 4: right now, no.

1439
01:07:25,560 --> 01:07:29,960
Speaker 2: Way the right way. But usually I come home from

1440
01:07:29,960 --> 01:07:31,520
Speaker 2: work and I'm so tired, so I just land the

1441
01:07:31,560 --> 01:07:37,160
Speaker 2: couch and watch TV, which gives me nothing. Usually, last

1442
01:07:37,240 --> 01:07:40,480
Speaker 2: night I started sewing a rip in a blanket that

1443
01:07:40,520 --> 01:07:44,240
Speaker 2: I have, and it was so like Laura Ingalls. It

1444
01:07:44,360 --> 01:07:46,320
Speaker 2: was really fun and it was I was like, oh,

1445
01:07:46,320 --> 01:07:48,040
Speaker 2: this is what people used to do to engage their

1446
01:07:48,080 --> 01:07:50,560
Speaker 2: minds and kind of get something done and feel.

1447
01:07:50,320 --> 01:07:53,080
Speaker 4: Like that's funny. Because night I fell out of a

1448
01:07:53,120 --> 01:07:58,160
Speaker 4: wagon and it made me blind. Like little House on

1449
01:07:58,240 --> 01:08:02,440
Speaker 4: the Prairie jokes. I'll tell you real specific age groups

1450
01:08:03,920 --> 01:08:10,160
Speaker 4: taking a ride on this unnamed street, gone.

1451
01:08:09,880 --> 01:08:14,080
Speaker 2: Sweet in episode number two, we're going to have a

1452
01:08:14,520 --> 01:08:15,480
Speaker 2: pre printed maps.

1453
01:08:15,480 --> 01:08:17,519
Speaker 4: We're gonna have phone.

1454
01:08:17,400 --> 01:08:19,479
Speaker 2: Numbers of people's Yeah, we know where they are when

1455
01:08:19,479 --> 01:08:19,880
Speaker 2: they land.

1456
01:08:19,960 --> 01:08:22,719
Speaker 8: It's gonna I jog a lot around here. I push

1457
01:08:22,760 --> 01:08:25,840
Speaker 8: my kids and they're double stroller up and down these hills.

1458
01:08:25,840 --> 01:08:28,840
Speaker 8: That's a lot of fun. Long legged man, aren't you

1459
01:08:29,240 --> 01:08:31,479
Speaker 8: at least my legs are strong, yess, my belly is

1460
01:08:31,920 --> 01:08:33,920
Speaker 8: large and my arms are.

1461
01:08:34,360 --> 01:08:37,120
Speaker 4: But you're someone that's marathons.

1462
01:08:37,680 --> 01:08:40,320
Speaker 5: I've done one marathon. I've done a lot of half marathons.

1463
01:08:41,240 --> 01:08:43,320
Speaker 2: What do you think about when you run for that long?

1464
01:08:44,360 --> 01:08:47,000
Speaker 8: Oh gosh, I mean everything. I think a lot about jokes.

1465
01:08:47,040 --> 01:08:49,280
Speaker 8: I'll come back and write jokes when i'm done.

1466
01:08:50,800 --> 01:08:57,200
Speaker 2: Yeah, there's something to exercise and comedy, right, yeah.

1467
01:08:56,800 --> 01:08:58,639
Speaker 5: Chris, you'll be thrilled to know you can't take left here.

1468
01:09:03,439 --> 01:09:07,320
Speaker 4: Oh, it's it's it's it's difficult. This part's difficult for me.

1469
01:09:07,439 --> 01:09:10,040
Speaker 4: And now I'm starting to feel self conscious. Oh no,

1470
01:09:10,200 --> 01:09:10,960
Speaker 4: it's okay.

1471
01:09:11,120 --> 01:09:13,720
Speaker 5: It's nobody could do this better than you right now.

1472
01:09:14,160 --> 01:09:16,200
Speaker 2: Nobody could do this but you.

1473
01:09:16,320 --> 01:09:18,840
Speaker 4: I know the original version less.

1474
01:09:18,600 --> 01:09:22,920
Speaker 8: Popular car My dad came to your show, Karen, that

1475
01:09:22,960 --> 01:09:28,040
Speaker 8: where I opened for you back in nineteen seventy one and.

1476
01:09:28,400 --> 01:09:30,000
Speaker 5: Loved it a lot. I remember him saying, well, she

1477
01:09:30,120 --> 01:09:31,519
Speaker 5: is just you know, she's something else.

1478
01:09:31,600 --> 01:09:35,160
Speaker 2: That was really Oh, that's really weird, fake musical.

1479
01:09:35,200 --> 01:09:37,600
Speaker 5: I was doing wonderful. It was so great, and my

1480
01:09:37,680 --> 01:09:38,720
Speaker 5: father and I loved it.

1481
01:09:38,840 --> 01:09:41,840
Speaker 2: Yay, I'm so glad. That was super fun.

1482
01:09:42,000 --> 01:09:45,360
Speaker 8: I remember I I made a joke he gave me.

1483
01:09:45,920 --> 01:09:50,360
Speaker 8: He's you know, sixty whatever, so naturally he carries a

1484
01:09:50,439 --> 01:09:53,439
Speaker 8: handkerchief with him or like a bandana, and it was

1485
01:09:53,439 --> 01:09:55,160
Speaker 8: do you remember it was really hot. They hadn't put

1486
01:09:55,200 --> 01:09:56,599
Speaker 8: ac until hergo yet.

1487
01:09:56,520 --> 01:09:56,880
Speaker 5: That's right.

1488
01:09:58,000 --> 01:10:02,160
Speaker 8: They He gave me a hank before the show because

1489
01:10:02,160 --> 01:10:04,639
Speaker 8: he could see that I was visibly sweating and had

1490
01:10:04,760 --> 01:10:08,800
Speaker 8: under boobs under boob cups, you know, of wetness.

1491
01:10:08,840 --> 01:10:10,519
Speaker 5: And I took.

1492
01:10:10,320 --> 01:10:11,479
Speaker 8: It and just put in my pocket and then I

1493
01:10:11,520 --> 01:10:14,080
Speaker 8: went up on stage and I used it and he said,

1494
01:10:14,160 --> 01:10:15,320
Speaker 8: uh or no, no.

1495
01:10:15,360 --> 01:10:16,400
Speaker 5: I said something about.

1496
01:10:16,200 --> 01:10:18,599
Speaker 8: You know, the the gay hanky codes where you've a

1497
01:10:18,600 --> 01:10:20,600
Speaker 8: certain colored hanky and certain but he's like, you like

1498
01:10:20,640 --> 01:10:22,200
Speaker 8: to do this, and I just talked about that. I

1499
01:10:22,240 --> 01:10:23,640
Speaker 8: was like, this is my hanky, which means that I

1500
01:10:23,720 --> 01:10:26,000
Speaker 8: like to I don't know like have Asian menp on

1501
01:10:26,080 --> 01:10:28,400
Speaker 8: me or whatever, and I was like, no, I'm just kidding.

1502
01:10:28,400 --> 01:10:30,639
Speaker 5: My dad's here. He gave to me. I remember after

1503
01:10:30,640 --> 01:10:30,920
Speaker 5: the show.

1504
01:10:30,960 --> 01:10:32,920
Speaker 8: My dad was like, so, you mean to tell me

1505
01:10:33,160 --> 01:10:36,320
Speaker 8: I just gave you a hanky before the show and.

1506
01:10:36,280 --> 01:10:38,160
Speaker 5: Then you just made that up right there on the spot.

1507
01:10:38,760 --> 01:10:41,720
Speaker 4: I was like, yeah, I mean yeah, as opposed to

1508
01:10:42,000 --> 01:10:44,320
Speaker 4: asking whether or not you're really at Asian menp on it.

1509
01:10:44,439 --> 01:10:46,719
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's great, much more impressive.

1510
01:10:46,760 --> 01:10:48,240
Speaker 4: So he's a supportive.

1511
01:10:47,800 --> 01:10:51,479
Speaker 2: Dad, Isn't that funny? Like these people that for the

1512
01:10:51,560 --> 01:10:53,760
Speaker 2: reason probably part of the reason that you're as funny

1513
01:10:53,800 --> 01:10:57,160
Speaker 2: as you are, really do have that thing where they

1514
01:10:57,160 --> 01:10:59,559
Speaker 2: can't believe what you do when you when they see

1515
01:10:59,560 --> 01:11:01,920
Speaker 2: you actually doing it. It's like one thing when you're

1516
01:11:01,920 --> 01:11:05,439
Speaker 2: standing around in the kitchen or whatever. But I kind

1517
01:11:05,439 --> 01:11:06,000
Speaker 2: of love that.

1518
01:11:07,560 --> 01:11:10,559
Speaker 4: For me, it's something my dad did a little and

1519
01:11:10,680 --> 01:11:13,880
Speaker 4: could have done, but he had kids and decided to

1520
01:11:13,920 --> 01:11:16,280
Speaker 4: move and go work for the government in Montana, as

1521
01:11:16,320 --> 01:11:17,080
Speaker 4: most dads do.

1522
01:11:17,240 --> 01:11:18,519
Speaker 2: Sure, it's a common choice.

1523
01:11:19,760 --> 01:11:22,920
Speaker 4: Yeah, but so yeah, it's it's nice to have supportive

1524
01:11:23,000 --> 01:11:26,920
Speaker 4: dads or just one, just one dad.

1525
01:11:27,920 --> 01:11:28,800
Speaker 2: It's best to have one.

1526
01:11:28,960 --> 01:11:33,599
Speaker 4: Yeah, multiple dads ends up being a bad sitcom. One

1527
01:11:33,600 --> 01:11:36,559
Speaker 4: of them is a sculptor. The other one's Paul Riser.

1528
01:11:37,800 --> 01:11:40,160
Speaker 2: One way we could go with this podcast is we

1529
01:11:40,240 --> 01:11:43,600
Speaker 2: drive people around and swept them out, and then we

1530
01:11:43,680 --> 01:11:44,200
Speaker 2: get them to.

1531
01:11:44,200 --> 01:11:46,639
Speaker 5: Admit something that's a good idea, right.

1532
01:11:46,520 --> 01:11:48,240
Speaker 2: Because they're so hot and tired.

1533
01:11:48,640 --> 01:11:50,840
Speaker 8: Remember that guy they had, like the sweat Lodges thing

1534
01:11:50,840 --> 01:11:52,040
Speaker 8: where people died recently.

1535
01:11:52,360 --> 01:11:55,880
Speaker 5: You should do that. You should kill Nikki Glazer your

1536
01:11:55,880 --> 01:11:56,800
Speaker 5: next podcast, just.

1537
01:11:56,720 --> 01:11:59,840
Speaker 2: Cook to death, sure and like some newators or back

1538
01:12:00,800 --> 01:12:02,520
Speaker 2: shoved in Poorges.

1539
01:12:03,040 --> 01:12:07,160
Speaker 6: That kilt Welcome back to Sweaty gun Point.

1540
01:12:07,360 --> 01:12:11,240
Speaker 2: And then we're both like we got Comedy Central specials.

1541
01:12:11,680 --> 01:12:13,479
Speaker 8: A lot of people were a little worried about, you know,

1542
01:12:13,520 --> 01:12:15,439
Speaker 8: the crop of future comedy because you killed a bunch

1543
01:12:15,479 --> 01:12:15,720
Speaker 8: of them.

1544
01:12:16,120 --> 01:12:17,840
Speaker 5: But it was fun.

1545
01:12:17,920 --> 01:12:22,560
Speaker 8: I mean the things they said before they died, my goodness, hilarious.

1546
01:12:22,600 --> 01:12:25,280
Speaker 4: It's funny what people what creative things people say when

1547
01:12:25,280 --> 01:12:28,360
Speaker 4: they're backs against the wall and they're about to die.

1548
01:12:28,240 --> 01:12:29,920
Speaker 2: Like I'm going towards the light.

1549
01:12:30,120 --> 01:12:34,000
Speaker 4: A lot of those jokes, yeah, real rich, real rich,

1550
01:12:34,040 --> 01:12:36,000
Speaker 4: Blurdy to Ratzy genius.

1551
01:12:37,160 --> 01:12:39,320
Speaker 5: That's a nice bush arch to the right there.

1552
01:12:39,320 --> 01:12:42,120
Speaker 8: Somebody who's moved an archway out of a bush orderline.

1553
01:12:42,880 --> 01:12:43,639
Speaker 5: That's really nice.

1554
01:12:44,680 --> 01:12:47,599
Speaker 4: I really like when hedges are shaped like something other

1555
01:12:47,640 --> 01:12:48,120
Speaker 4: than a head.

1556
01:12:48,280 --> 01:12:48,920
Speaker 5: Wasn't that fun?

1557
01:12:50,720 --> 01:12:53,519
Speaker 4: Animals are nice? Oh, there's a dairy queen by my house.

1558
01:12:53,600 --> 01:12:55,680
Speaker 4: They made the hedge look like a soft serve ice

1559
01:12:55,760 --> 01:12:58,760
Speaker 4: cream tone. Yeah, for real photos of it.

1560
01:12:58,800 --> 01:13:00,120
Speaker 5: I'll show you at.

1561
01:13:01,479 --> 01:13:02,360
Speaker 4: Coming up soon.

1562
01:13:03,000 --> 01:13:04,519
Speaker 5: There's a nice breeze coming through here.

1563
01:13:04,600 --> 01:13:06,600
Speaker 4: Huh.

1564
01:13:06,640 --> 01:13:07,640
Speaker 5: Whose dream catcher is that?

1565
01:13:07,840 --> 01:13:08,639
Speaker 4: Is that? That is mine?

1566
01:13:08,680 --> 01:13:11,000
Speaker 6: It captures most of my sleeping time.

1567
01:13:11,120 --> 01:13:11,760
Speaker 4: Vision love?

1568
01:13:11,800 --> 01:13:13,320
Speaker 5: It is this the car you sleeping?

1569
01:13:13,640 --> 01:13:19,400
Speaker 4: I sleep? I got confused when someone first introduced me

1570
01:13:19,439 --> 01:13:22,360
Speaker 4: to the idea of a car bed. It turns out

1571
01:13:22,400 --> 01:13:24,519
Speaker 4: that's a bad shape, like a car. I've been sleeping

1572
01:13:24,520 --> 01:13:27,960
Speaker 4: in this car out of confusion for and necessity I am.

1573
01:13:28,200 --> 01:13:30,040
Speaker 4: I am an unemployed person, so.

1574
01:13:30,520 --> 01:13:33,360
Speaker 5: I sleep in my car a lot. I mean, I'm

1575
01:13:33,400 --> 01:13:34,839
Speaker 5: a big car napper.

1576
01:13:35,560 --> 01:13:38,880
Speaker 8: Well, like if you like have a fang at four

1577
01:13:39,120 --> 01:13:40,880
Speaker 8: somewhere and then you have a set like not far

1578
01:13:40,920 --> 01:13:41,240
Speaker 8: from there.

1579
01:13:41,520 --> 01:13:44,960
Speaker 4: Yeah, whatever, you're being serious, I do too. I sleep

1580
01:13:44,960 --> 01:13:46,880
Speaker 4: in my car all the time. I'll sleep at the

1581
01:13:46,920 --> 01:13:49,800
Speaker 4: drop of a hat, a driving.

1582
01:13:49,479 --> 01:13:52,000
Speaker 2: Hat, anytime I'm in that situation. I always go to

1583
01:13:52,040 --> 01:13:54,600
Speaker 2: Starbucks and drink way too much coffee, and then for

1584
01:13:54,640 --> 01:13:56,679
Speaker 2: the first three minutes my set, I have dry mouth

1585
01:13:57,120 --> 01:13:59,200
Speaker 2: and I seem nervous even though it's just caffeine.

1586
01:13:59,479 --> 01:14:02,400
Speaker 5: Well, here were our folks. This is the place. Yeah,

1587
01:14:04,080 --> 01:14:06,200
Speaker 5: thank you. This has been such a pleasure.

1588
01:14:06,360 --> 01:14:07,880
Speaker 4: It's been a pleasure to have you.

1589
01:14:07,920 --> 01:14:09,320
Speaker 2: Thank you so much for doing this with us.

1590
01:14:09,400 --> 01:14:11,040
Speaker 8: I really had fun. It was a pleasure to see

1591
01:14:11,080 --> 01:14:13,599
Speaker 8: you guys. I'm gonna go be with my family now.

1592
01:14:13,720 --> 01:14:14,559
Speaker 4: Of course you should.

1593
01:14:14,760 --> 01:14:17,519
Speaker 8: I don't mind saying that I love you and I

1594
01:14:17,520 --> 01:14:18,360
Speaker 8: hope to see again soon.

1595
01:14:18,600 --> 01:14:20,960
Speaker 6: And you get to clarify you love your family or

1596
01:14:20,960 --> 01:14:21,559
Speaker 6: you love us.

1597
01:14:22,000 --> 01:14:25,519
Speaker 5: I love you great, right too, of course?

1598
01:14:25,880 --> 01:14:28,720
Speaker 4: Okay, let's say we love them. Okay, I love you too.

1599
01:14:28,880 --> 01:14:29,479
Speaker 2: We love you too.

1600
01:14:29,560 --> 01:14:31,920
Speaker 5: Rum Thanks guys, and I'll see you soon.

1601
01:14:32,000 --> 01:14:32,920
Speaker 4: Okay, see you soon?

1602
01:14:32,960 --> 01:14:35,400
Speaker 2: By are you leaving?

1603
01:14:36,000 --> 01:14:37,920
Speaker 1: You wanna way back?

1604
01:14:38,640 --> 01:14:39,160
Speaker 2: Either way?

1605
01:14:39,400 --> 01:14:40,320
Speaker 5: We want to be.

1606
01:14:40,360 --> 01:14:46,559
Speaker 3: There, doesn't matter how much baggage you give us time

1607
01:14:46,720 --> 01:14:51,960
Speaker 3: and day turning on engage. We want to send you

1608
01:14:52,240 --> 01:14:57,000
Speaker 3: us instid. We want to welcome you back home.

1609
01:14:58,880 --> 01:15:01,240
Speaker 2: Tell us all the black out it we scared her?

1610
01:15:01,479 --> 01:15:02,240
Speaker 1: Was it fine?

1611
01:15:04,200 --> 01:15:04,360
Speaker 2: Now?

1612
01:15:04,479 --> 01:15:24,120
Speaker 1: Porn do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

1613
01:15:24,720 --> 01:15:28,000
Speaker 2: Do you need to ride? Do you need to ride?

1614
01:15:28,640 --> 01:15:29,960
Speaker 2: Do you need to ride?

1615
01:15:30,600 --> 01:15:32,439
Speaker 1: Do you need ride?

1616
01:15:32,640 --> 01:15:34,000
Speaker 4: Do you need to ride?

1617
01:15:34,560 --> 01:15:42,800
Speaker 6: Do you need With Karen and chriss

1618
01:15:44,640 --> 01:15:44,680
Speaker 5: M