WEBVTT - Sittin on the Dock of the Bay 0:00:01.400 --> 0:00:04.760 I Suck Good Dating with Dean, Vanessa and Jared and 0:00:04.840 --> 0:00:10.160 I Heart Radio Podcast. Hello everyone, Welcome to this week's 0:00:10.160 --> 0:00:13.360 episode of Help I Suck At Dating. A very special 0:00:13.400 --> 0:00:16.880 episode because we are recording live from Oracle Park, I 0:00:16.880 --> 0:00:19.880 can't take you seriously in San Francisco. We're on a 0:00:19.920 --> 0:00:21.759 little bit of a time constraint today, so Vanessa and 0:00:21.800 --> 0:00:24.919 I are gonna be bulldozing through this episode. We've got 0:00:25.000 --> 0:00:27.760 a fun one, We've got analyze here in the stadium 0:00:27.800 --> 0:00:29.960 with us. We also have the men from How Men 0:00:30.080 --> 0:00:32.120 Think About Dmitri and Rick are going to come on. 0:00:32.760 --> 0:00:35.880 And Rick actually has a thirteen year old son who's 0:00:35.920 --> 0:00:37.599 the eighth grade who I want to get. I want 0:00:37.600 --> 0:00:41.239 to ask he's a good looking young man. I want 0:00:41.240 --> 0:00:42.800 to ask him what it's like to date as an 0:00:42.800 --> 0:00:46.040 eighth grader. Because obviously we're all, as co host, pretty 0:00:46.040 --> 0:00:47.760 removed from eighth grade. I just think it'd be fun 0:00:47.800 --> 0:00:49.680 to see maybe how it's changed. We can compare and 0:00:49.720 --> 0:00:51.240 contrast how it was for us. I think it's a 0:00:51.240 --> 0:00:55.000 good idea all those decades ago. Um, but first, thanks, first, Vanessa, 0:00:55.080 --> 0:00:58.720 how are you? I'm good? So we literally just landed, 0:00:58.800 --> 0:01:01.120 came straight to the stadium, So at Oracle Park right now. 0:01:01.160 --> 0:01:05.000 It's my second time in San Francisco. Um, I've been 0:01:05.040 --> 0:01:07.400 to a few baseball games before. When X when when 0:01:07.400 --> 0:01:09.720 Montreal had the Expos. We're trying to get them back 0:01:09.840 --> 0:01:15.360 real hard. Washington. Yeah, um so now the capitals now 0:01:15.440 --> 0:01:17.240 that the capital, So we're trying to I mean, Expos 0:01:17.240 --> 0:01:19.200 don't exist anymore, so we're really trying hard to get 0:01:19.200 --> 0:01:21.600 them back to Montreal. So I brought my baseball cap. 0:01:21.600 --> 0:01:23.720 Hopefully I won't get any popcorn thrown at me today, 0:01:23.920 --> 0:01:25.800 but very excited to be here. I haven't seen you 0:01:25.840 --> 0:01:28.280 in a while. A minute, Yeah, it's been since Tahoe. 0:01:28.319 --> 0:01:32.560 Well you um did a loan solo episode two weeks ago. Yea, 0:01:32.959 --> 0:01:34.920 and you were at a wedding this past weekend. I 0:01:35.000 --> 0:01:37.720 was at two weddings this past weekend, and that kind 0:01:37.720 --> 0:01:40.600 of when's the last time you went to a wedding? Well, 0:01:40.959 --> 0:01:45.360 I mean we know that answer. Um. Yeah, I feel 0:01:45.400 --> 0:01:49.120 like after I went to those weddings, I love. Maybe 0:01:49.120 --> 0:01:50.920 it's because we were on the show and we have 0:01:51.080 --> 0:01:54.520 that we're constantly in the spotlight. I just felt like, 0:01:54.640 --> 0:01:56.840 I think the day I get married, I just want 0:01:56.840 --> 0:01:58.720 to have a barbecue. I'm gonna invite people to a 0:01:58.720 --> 0:02:01.520 barbecue in my backyard. Whoever shows up shows up, and 0:02:01.600 --> 0:02:04.200 they have they'll have no idea. That's my actual wedding day, 0:02:04.480 --> 0:02:06.320 and then that'll be it. Like no one has to 0:02:06.360 --> 0:02:08.320 spend money on their hair, no one has to spend 0:02:08.320 --> 0:02:10.160 money on buying a dress. I've had a similar thought 0:02:10.200 --> 0:02:11.760 to that, actually, but it would be a beach thing. 0:02:11.840 --> 0:02:13.640 So I mean, yeah, I think it's it's good. But 0:02:13.760 --> 0:02:17.000 what about the weddings gave you that idea. I don't know. 0:02:17.040 --> 0:02:19.600 I think it was just, uh, it's a lot, you know, 0:02:19.680 --> 0:02:23.040 it's a lot of planning and preparation, and that even 0:02:23.080 --> 0:02:25.600 for the guests going watch me have the most elaborate wedding. 0:02:25.639 --> 0:02:27.800 After I say this, well, you are kind of like, 0:02:27.960 --> 0:02:33.920 uh uh oh God, here here comes an insult. Insult you? 0:02:35.800 --> 0:02:39.320 How do I say this? You like nice things? Oh? Really? Well? 0:02:39.480 --> 0:02:42.120 Like you? I don't know. I know it looks like 0:02:42.160 --> 0:02:44.560 I like nice things, but I like to like you 0:02:44.600 --> 0:02:46.359 like nice clothes, and you like to do your hair. 0:02:46.360 --> 0:02:48.760 And where jewelry do you? Not? Not? Really? The only 0:02:48.840 --> 0:02:51.520 jewelier I'm wearing right now is my ring that my 0:02:51.520 --> 0:02:53.840 grandmother gave me looking through your Instagram. I I see 0:02:53.880 --> 0:02:57.320 you as like a like a high class and I 0:02:57.360 --> 0:03:02.400 like dressing up. Absolutely know, I didn't want to, Oh 0:03:02.560 --> 0:03:04.519 you do not know me, but like someone that likes 0:03:04.560 --> 0:03:08.440 to like celebrate grand grandly, you know what I mean. 0:03:09.160 --> 0:03:11.360 I mean, listen, if we're comparing you to me, yes, 0:03:11.800 --> 0:03:16.840 but no, I don't live in a van. I live 0:03:16.880 --> 0:03:19.600 in a very nice part of the Especially with you 0:03:19.680 --> 0:03:23.600 being like as um and like aware of your own 0:03:23.600 --> 0:03:25.160 emotions as you are, I feel like it's gonna be 0:03:25.160 --> 0:03:26.320 hard for you not to want to have a big 0:03:26.320 --> 0:03:28.639 wedding because I don't know. I mean, listen, I come 0:03:28.680 --> 0:03:32.799 from an Italian background, and we the weddings that we do, 0:03:32.840 --> 0:03:36.240 the baptism, the confirmations, like everything is always so big 0:03:36.360 --> 0:03:39.280 and we sell it. We love to celebrate um And 0:03:39.320 --> 0:03:40.880 for me, it's like I want to celebrate with the 0:03:40.920 --> 0:03:43.600 people that I see on a daily basis, and that's 0:03:43.640 --> 0:03:47.000 the people that I basically see every Sunday, which is 0:03:47.040 --> 0:03:49.240 my family and my closest friends. So I don't know, 0:03:49.280 --> 0:03:51.000 this is just something that went through my head because 0:03:51.000 --> 0:03:52.880 it was a lot. That day was two weddings, and 0:03:52.920 --> 0:03:56.600 then the next day, yes, and it was an hour away. 0:03:56.680 --> 0:03:58.680 There were an hour away from each other. How did 0:03:58.680 --> 0:04:00.200 that end up working out? So one of the morning 0:04:00.200 --> 0:04:02.520 wedding and one was an afternoon one was they were 0:04:02.560 --> 0:04:06.040 both an afternoon wedding. But my boyfriend came with me 0:04:06.160 --> 0:04:08.400 to the first one, which was my close friend, and 0:04:08.440 --> 0:04:11.080 then I went to his friend's reception, so I got 0:04:11.080 --> 0:04:13.880 to meet all the rest of his friends. Um, which 0:04:13.920 --> 0:04:15.920 was crazy because I think I was talking about it 0:04:15.960 --> 0:04:20.120 with Annelie, who's here high girl, which okay, So she's like, 0:04:20.160 --> 0:04:21.880 I didn't know that you were got You and Josh 0:04:21.880 --> 0:04:23.679 were dating for a couple of months. I think people 0:04:23.720 --> 0:04:26.920 think that I've we've been dating for longer than how 0:04:26.960 --> 0:04:30.680 long is Christmas? December? Jenni Faberite March, April, May, June July. Wow, 0:04:30.720 --> 0:04:34.520 you're good nine months? Um, no idea why I just 0:04:34.560 --> 0:04:36.560 said that. Oh yeah, So I met the rest of 0:04:36.560 --> 0:04:40.000 his friends at the wedding, right, So for me, I 0:04:40.040 --> 0:04:42.320 think it's so let me ask you this, being with 0:04:42.400 --> 0:04:47.800 your boyfriend, surrounded by love and weddings, all these things 0:04:47.800 --> 0:04:50.200 that make you peel all these things, How does that 0:04:51.160 --> 0:04:54.440 does it put things into perspective for you at all? Like? 0:04:54.480 --> 0:04:57.040 Does it make you want to maybe expedite the process 0:04:57.040 --> 0:04:58.880 a little bit or get you more excited for marriage 0:04:58.920 --> 0:05:02.400 potentially with Josh, I mean, listen, you know me, I've 0:05:02.400 --> 0:05:04.719 always wanted to get married, I've always wanted to have kids, 0:05:04.839 --> 0:05:07.840 and I think for the longest time, every time I 0:05:07.880 --> 0:05:10.239 started dating someone, I thought, oh, this is the person 0:05:10.320 --> 0:05:12.880 for me, because in my romantic head, I thought, if 0:05:12.880 --> 0:05:14.560 I'm dating him, for sure, he's going to be the 0:05:14.560 --> 0:05:16.920 person and end up with. But with Josh, it's such 0:05:16.960 --> 0:05:20.960 a different feeling. It's a sense of like I feel 0:05:21.000 --> 0:05:23.480 at home with him, um and yeah. When we're at 0:05:23.480 --> 0:05:25.120 the wedding together, I'm like, I can't wait for the 0:05:25.200 --> 0:05:27.560 day where I'm walking down the aisle and I just 0:05:27.600 --> 0:05:29.640 want to see his face when the first time he 0:05:29.680 --> 0:05:31.520 sees me, and those thoughts that go through my mind. 0:05:31.680 --> 0:05:33.600 And then a couple of days later, he looked at 0:05:33.640 --> 0:05:36.440 me when we woke up and he's like, I'm gonna 0:05:36.440 --> 0:05:40.320 marry you, and I'm like, my god, I'm gonna cry. 0:05:40.520 --> 0:05:43.000 Can I ask a favorite of you when you get married? 0:05:43.760 --> 0:05:47.720 Will you invite me to your wedding and not invite Jared. 0:05:50.240 --> 0:05:51.880 That's the favor that I'm asking of you right now, 0:05:53.520 --> 0:05:55.160 Like I said it's gonna be a small wedding, so 0:05:55.200 --> 0:05:57.320 maybe no one's getting an invite. So it's just being 0:05:57.400 --> 0:05:59.240 Josh and I. There you go. If you're listening to this, 0:05:59.560 --> 0:06:06.240 I'm going to va it is not. The challenging thing 0:06:06.320 --> 0:06:08.039 for me is when I get married, who am I 0:06:08.040 --> 0:06:10.760 going to invite? Me? Does? Because I have to continue 0:06:10.760 --> 0:06:13.479 the trend of one person can come one So I 0:06:13.480 --> 0:06:15.080 guess it's going to go back to me not coming. 0:06:15.320 --> 0:06:17.920 I mean as whatever. I always feel like the left, 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:20.920 the one man that's out of the equation. I'm gonna 0:06:20.920 --> 0:06:22.280 have a wedding and you're gonna be the only person 0:06:22.320 --> 0:06:25.000 in attendance. I love it. Can I what's it called officiate? 0:06:25.040 --> 0:06:27.520 You can officiate? Yeah, that'd be great. Um, okay, cool. 0:06:27.560 --> 0:06:30.080 So you had the weddings, You are incredibly happy in 0:06:30.120 --> 0:06:34.159 your relationship, very happy. But now enough about me, Jane. 0:06:34.400 --> 0:06:37.560 So we just watched the last episode of this well 0:06:37.600 --> 0:06:39.880 this week's episode on Tuesday. Well, so, just for the 0:06:39.920 --> 0:06:44.440 listener's sake, we're recording this episode the Thursday before the 0:06:44.480 --> 0:06:47.400 week after I dumped Kalin. So we have not seen 0:06:47.440 --> 0:06:51.560 this week's episode of Bachelor in Paradise, but it has 0:06:51.560 --> 0:06:53.679 been teased that I returned back to Paradise this week, 0:06:54.000 --> 0:06:55.560 but again we have not seen the episode, so we 0:06:55.560 --> 0:06:59.120 don't know exactly what happens um and I can't really 0:06:59.120 --> 0:07:01.240 talk much about it. Let me just tell you this. 0:07:01.320 --> 0:07:04.200 I guess between the time of me leaving and the 0:07:04.240 --> 0:07:06.200 time of me being teased coming back, I think I 0:07:06.200 --> 0:07:09.200 can tell you what I did. I landed in San Diego. 0:07:09.920 --> 0:07:12.800 I drove all the way to the Grand Canyon. I 0:07:12.880 --> 0:07:15.600 sat there for a couple of hours, thought about things, 0:07:15.720 --> 0:07:19.000 Listen to music, listen to some lectures, read a book, 0:07:19.520 --> 0:07:23.240 drove down to Phoenix. Called one of the producers and said, hey, 0:07:23.640 --> 0:07:25.280 I want to come back to the beach. What do 0:07:25.320 --> 0:07:27.960 you think this is? After how many days after you 0:07:28.080 --> 0:07:31.840 left Paradise. This was basically the same day I think 0:07:31.880 --> 0:07:34.880 I landed in San Diego and I called them and 0:07:34.920 --> 0:07:37.280 I was like, hey, guys, I'm sad you left and 0:07:37.320 --> 0:07:39.720 you had immediate regrets. So this is in between time 0:07:39.760 --> 0:07:42.080 between obviously, Like I think that's kind of appropriate, right 0:07:42.080 --> 0:07:44.880 because I left on the show and I come back 0:07:44.920 --> 0:07:46.640 next week, and so yeah, this isn't between time. And 0:07:46.640 --> 0:07:48.040 so yeah, so I landed and I was really upset, 0:07:48.080 --> 0:07:49.560 and so I called them, We figured it out. I 0:07:49.560 --> 0:07:51.280 don't think I can get too much into the nitty 0:07:51.280 --> 0:07:54.480 gritty about that right now, but UM, drove to the 0:07:54.480 --> 0:07:56.960 Grand Canyon, thought about things, called them. They decided today 0:07:57.000 --> 0:07:58.200 would let me come back. And so that's what you're 0:07:58.200 --> 0:08:01.080 gonna see next week is me coming back, which will 0:08:01.120 --> 0:08:03.960 be fun for us to watch. I think I don't 0:08:03.960 --> 0:08:06.640 really know how it's going to go, but my hopes 0:08:06.640 --> 0:08:09.880 are high and it should be at least entertaining if 0:08:09.880 --> 0:08:14.200 nothing else. Um, But obviously next week, after that all happens, 0:08:14.200 --> 0:08:16.240 we can talk about it a little bit more depth. Yes, 0:08:16.240 --> 0:08:19.640 because I have so many questions. I actually wrote a draft. 0:08:20.160 --> 0:08:23.760 I wrote a list of questions because it's it's so 0:08:23.840 --> 0:08:26.200 upsetting to see. And I'm such a fan of Dean 0:08:26.680 --> 0:08:29.960 and you know this, So it's so upsetting to see 0:08:30.000 --> 0:08:32.679 the self doubt that you have about yourself and how 0:08:32.800 --> 0:08:36.280 you think someone else observes more happiness. And I like 0:08:36.320 --> 0:08:38.320 how Calin puts you in your spot every now and then, 0:08:38.320 --> 0:08:40.320 and she's like, why are you making that decision for me? 0:08:40.679 --> 0:08:43.199 So I do want to get into this, but I 0:08:43.280 --> 0:08:45.079 guess we'll talk about it next week when you do 0:08:45.280 --> 0:08:47.960 reappear hopefully she'll take you back. I do want to. 0:08:48.120 --> 0:08:49.840 I'll touch on that really quick, Kenn, we can move 0:08:49.840 --> 0:08:52.280 on to the next segment. Um. I think that the 0:08:52.360 --> 0:08:54.960 self doubt is more of not that I don't think 0:08:55.000 --> 0:08:57.240 I have enough to offer people, but just that I'm 0:08:57.240 --> 0:08:59.840 not willing to offer the things that they want to receive. 0:09:00.160 --> 0:09:02.320 You know what I mean? Is that just because I 0:09:02.360 --> 0:09:03.800 just said I'm in a mode in my life right 0:09:03.800 --> 0:09:06.600 now where i want to focus on myself and be selfish, etcetera, etcetera. 0:09:06.720 --> 0:09:08.160 But I would love touch more on that next week 0:09:08.160 --> 0:09:10.079 when we talk about that, when we're able to talk 0:09:10.080 --> 0:09:14.280 about that more depth. Um. So, next up, we are 0:09:14.360 --> 0:09:18.320 going to speak with fellow Bachelor contestant and she's going 0:09:18.360 --> 0:09:20.760 to update us on her life because she's been dating 0:09:21.160 --> 0:09:24.400 and it's getting pretty serious. Can we talk about it? 0:09:24.480 --> 0:09:28.920 But we can't wait? Wait, yes, we can talk about it, 0:09:29.000 --> 0:09:32.640 but before we talk about it, sorry, the producer is 0:09:32.679 --> 0:09:34.400 looking at me with a stink face, like we can't 0:09:34.440 --> 0:09:36.040 talk about it a h percent. We can talk about 0:09:36.040 --> 0:09:38.360 and we're going to talk about it. Before we do that, though, 0:09:38.720 --> 0:09:40.840 We're gonna take one quick break and then really dive 0:09:40.880 --> 0:09:45.760 into it with Amlice Okay, we're back. So Anale, Hi, 0:09:46.080 --> 0:09:49.200 how are you. I'm doing well and you look great. 0:09:49.360 --> 0:09:50.880 You just cut your hair. I love it. I love 0:09:50.920 --> 0:09:53.480 the new look. I did a little jop. I thought 0:09:53.480 --> 0:09:59.600 like I needed a new do looking hot. It took 0:09:59.640 --> 0:10:06.160 us put let's go ahead and edit that part. No, 0:10:06.320 --> 0:10:10.280 please keep that alright, as Pillison, last time we talked 0:10:10.280 --> 0:10:12.240 to you, we were in Tahoe. That was like four 0:10:12.360 --> 0:10:16.960 or five weeks ago something like that. Isn't that short that? Okay, 0:10:16.840 --> 0:10:21.439 maybe five six weeks ago. Anyways, phil us in what's 0:10:21.480 --> 0:10:24.640 going on in your life? Life has been good? Uh? 0:10:26.559 --> 0:10:30.840 Are we really talking about my dating is a dating podcast? Yes, 0:10:30.920 --> 0:10:35.560 I have been dating somebody tell us about it. Dean 0:10:35.679 --> 0:10:37.839 loves getting and he's really good at getting information out 0:10:37.840 --> 0:10:40.520 of people. So just warning you. Whatever you feel like sharing, 0:10:41.360 --> 0:10:44.520 I'm gonna share like the bare minimum because I'm not 0:10:44.559 --> 0:10:49.199 ready to dive in completely with details. But but yeah, 0:10:49.240 --> 0:10:51.520 I met somebody and he's great, and I feel like, uh, 0:10:52.240 --> 0:10:55.679 it's the first time, maybe ever, that I'm like, Wow, 0:10:56.000 --> 0:11:01.600 I'm worthy of this kind of relationship and I feels yeah, 0:11:01.640 --> 0:11:03.280 I don't know if I don't know, if maybe I 0:11:03.320 --> 0:11:05.319 thought in the past that like I deserved somebody this 0:11:05.480 --> 0:11:09.559 great and he's really amazing. How did you meet? Uh? 0:11:09.600 --> 0:11:12.400 We met at a time. It's a very much like 0:11:12.480 --> 0:11:15.679 when you least expected situation. I was. It was right 0:11:15.720 --> 0:11:19.240 after doing Paradise and I was done with men for 0:11:19.280 --> 0:11:20.640 a bit. I was like, I'm going to just take 0:11:21.040 --> 0:11:22.920 a break from dating. I'm not going to date until 0:11:23.200 --> 0:11:26.240 maybe the show is done airing, and then you know, 0:11:26.400 --> 0:11:28.560 slowly get back into things. I had a couple of 0:11:28.559 --> 0:11:30.640 people that wanted to set me up with, you know, 0:11:30.760 --> 0:11:33.480 friends of the family or whatever, and I'm like, okay, sure, 0:11:34.000 --> 0:11:36.000 but not for a while because I'm just not ready 0:11:36.200 --> 0:11:38.280 and I'm taking a break. And then I went out 0:11:38.320 --> 0:11:40.960 to bring up be a wing woman basically for a 0:11:40.960 --> 0:11:43.920 friend of mine, and she started talking to these guys 0:11:43.920 --> 0:11:46.839 and when we became friends with them and then just 0:11:47.080 --> 0:11:49.320 have hung out pretty much every day since. Didn't work 0:11:49.320 --> 0:11:51.520 out for your friends, No, I mean that was like 0:11:51.600 --> 0:11:54.520 she she unfortunately didn't. Well, she actually did meet somebody, 0:11:54.520 --> 0:11:58.480 but not that weekend. So yeah, things are good and okay, great, 0:11:58.520 --> 0:12:00.480 So that was how long like six weeks ago? Ish, 0:12:01.160 --> 0:12:04.760 we're cusping on too many months. Yeah, that's great. It's 0:12:04.760 --> 0:12:07.200 always the most interesting time too, because like you're trying 0:12:07.240 --> 0:12:08.840 to get to know someone, you're trying to figure out 0:12:08.880 --> 0:12:10.680 what they like, what they dis like. Also very weird 0:12:10.720 --> 0:12:15.800 because the show started airing like, oh two weeks maybe 0:12:15.840 --> 0:12:18.040 after we So, how did you approach that with him? 0:12:18.120 --> 0:12:19.600 Because I'm sure he knew that you were from the 0:12:19.600 --> 0:12:22.520 Bachelor franchise. He didn't because he's not he's so far 0:12:22.600 --> 0:12:25.360 removed from social media and all that sort of stuff, 0:12:25.400 --> 0:12:29.040 So that's a great sign. Yeah, So I I just 0:12:29.080 --> 0:12:31.319 said it, like on second time we hung out one 0:12:31.320 --> 0:12:33.079 on one, or maybe the first time we hung out 0:12:33.080 --> 0:12:35.079 one on one, I was like, I gotta be honest 0:12:35.120 --> 0:12:36.920 with you, did you know what it was? Did you 0:12:36.960 --> 0:12:40.280 know what? Trying to remember if he did, because my 0:12:40.360 --> 0:12:42.360 boyfriend still has so many questions. He has no idea 0:12:42.440 --> 0:12:44.920 what Paradise is. He's like, oh, she's on it? Why 0:12:45.000 --> 0:12:46.600 was she on it? Did she not? Fine? Love? And 0:12:46.600 --> 0:12:48.600 I'm like, yeah, it's yeah, I mean that's something how 0:12:48.600 --> 0:12:53.320 the conversation was as well. But yeah, I think he 0:12:53.400 --> 0:12:55.080 was sort of aware of the show but doesn't know 0:12:55.120 --> 0:12:57.640 anything about it. So and then, how was it watching 0:12:57.640 --> 0:12:59.439 the show when you were on it with him? Oh? 0:12:59.480 --> 0:13:03.000 I didn't did you like, did you like this allow him? 0:13:03.000 --> 0:13:04.520 Like you just said you're not watching it or you know. 0:13:04.520 --> 0:13:07.440 I actually I have a really really hard time watching 0:13:07.600 --> 0:13:11.560 myself back on it. So I wasn't going to watch it. 0:13:11.760 --> 0:13:13.319 And then when I found out that I was going 0:13:13.360 --> 0:13:16.600 to the reunion, I just binge watched every episode. How 0:13:16.679 --> 0:13:19.600 did you feel about your parts on the show? Um so, 0:13:19.679 --> 0:13:21.720 I actually had. I had seen my parts, just because 0:13:21.760 --> 0:13:23.560 I have friends on the East Coast who would send 0:13:23.559 --> 0:13:26.439 me clips because I was I'd have panic attacks like 0:13:26.760 --> 0:13:30.400 minor ones before, you know, knowing like okay, tonight's the 0:13:30.480 --> 0:13:33.080 night that this part airs, so they would send me 0:13:33.120 --> 0:13:35.960 my little clips, and um so I got to see 0:13:36.000 --> 0:13:38.800 that in real time. Basically we talk about paradise for 0:13:38.800 --> 0:13:40.560 a second. I know it's hard to put yourself back 0:13:40.600 --> 0:13:43.080 into that situation, especially now that you're you know, in 0:13:43.120 --> 0:13:46.400 a good relationship. What happened with the whole Chris Poukowski thing. 0:13:47.480 --> 0:13:50.640 Uh So that that was frustrating to watch back, and 0:13:50.679 --> 0:13:52.439 I don't like it's always hard because I don't know 0:13:52.480 --> 0:13:57.440 exactly what I can say, and just um he he 0:13:57.520 --> 0:14:00.520 was really pursuing me that first week, and they didn't 0:14:00.520 --> 0:14:03.080 really show our relationship at all. And I think it's 0:14:03.080 --> 0:14:07.719 frustrating watching it back and seeing it be shown as 0:14:07.760 --> 0:14:11.000 so one sided because it really wasn't and he really, 0:14:11.040 --> 0:14:14.480 I think, struggled with that decision that night. I Christina 0:14:14.559 --> 0:14:17.079 sort of like came and had a conversation with him, 0:14:17.120 --> 0:14:21.440 and I think I don't know what was going through 0:14:21.480 --> 0:14:24.360 his head, but um, but I think he was probably thinking, 0:14:24.360 --> 0:14:26.520 oh maybe and at least is more serious, and so 0:14:27.480 --> 0:14:29.280 I don't want to be like committing myself to her 0:14:29.480 --> 0:14:31.800 for the rest of this time. Um, but I just 0:14:31.800 --> 0:14:33.680 wish he would have had that conversation with me, because 0:14:33.760 --> 0:14:35.840 if he would have, you would have realized I wasn't 0:14:35.920 --> 0:14:38.360 there yet. But do you have any resentment towards Christina 0:14:38.360 --> 0:14:42.160 ever coming in and saying that? I mean a little bit. 0:14:42.200 --> 0:14:43.760 I feel like whatever she said to Chris was the 0:14:43.800 --> 0:14:47.200 same thing she said to Blake when he was I 0:14:47.240 --> 0:14:50.560 feel like it was the exact same And yeah, so 0:14:50.640 --> 0:14:53.280 I mean, but the thing is is everything happens for 0:14:53.320 --> 0:14:56.000 a reason, and I am a firm believer on that, 0:14:56.040 --> 0:14:58.760 and I think that, yes, I was disappointed in the 0:14:58.840 --> 0:15:02.360 moment because I felt really jipped of the whole experience. Um. 0:15:02.400 --> 0:15:04.960 Watching it back then and like my person definitely never 0:15:05.000 --> 0:15:08.320 showed up on the beach, So it's you know, it 0:15:08.440 --> 0:15:10.240 is what it is. I think I sort of went 0:15:10.320 --> 0:15:13.680 back this time thinking, oh, I'm excited to make more 0:15:13.760 --> 0:15:17.440 friends and be still open to the possibility of love 0:15:17.480 --> 0:15:20.800 because it's sort of worked for me, uh the year before, 0:15:21.040 --> 0:15:24.520 you know, Um, so I was hopeful, but I yeah, 0:15:24.520 --> 0:15:28.000 I just felt jipped more than anything. Both comparing season 0:15:28.000 --> 0:15:30.840 to season. It's hard too because you were there for 0:15:30.840 --> 0:15:33.280 a short amount of time this second time around. But 0:15:33.440 --> 0:15:37.080 also you it's it's easier to kind of remove yourself 0:15:37.120 --> 0:15:39.640 because you got less attached to someone, right, So would 0:15:39.680 --> 0:15:41.320 you say that like the first time was better or 0:15:41.320 --> 0:15:43.680 the second time was better in your experience? So, and 0:15:43.720 --> 0:15:47.000 this is another part of just editing that gets frustrating. 0:15:47.080 --> 0:15:50.360 Is I actually, I really really loved how I handled 0:15:50.360 --> 0:15:52.840 Paradise this year. I felt like I went in, I 0:15:52.920 --> 0:15:55.640 was open, I talked to everyone, which wasn't really shown, 0:15:55.840 --> 0:15:58.920 but I did there. I felt like there weren't a 0:15:58.920 --> 0:16:01.400 ton of options for me, and I actually did have 0:16:01.440 --> 0:16:04.040 a connection with Chris and so it was just an easy, 0:16:04.120 --> 0:16:09.080 natural fit to just spend my time with him. But 0:16:09.080 --> 0:16:13.200 but I still was happy with how I handled everything. Uh, 0:16:13.680 --> 0:16:15.680 maybe some things I would have done slightly different, but 0:16:15.720 --> 0:16:17.200 I did feel like I did Paradise the way I 0:16:17.240 --> 0:16:18.920 wanted to do Paradise this year, even though it was 0:16:18.960 --> 0:16:21.040 only a very short amount of time. And to your point, 0:16:21.080 --> 0:16:22.440 like you said earlier, it's hard to look back and 0:16:22.440 --> 0:16:24.640 regret anything because you're happy now, right So it's like 0:16:25.040 --> 0:16:27.680 everything happened for a reason. Obviously, it's a It's a 0:16:27.720 --> 0:16:29.120 good place to be right now because I feel like 0:16:29.160 --> 0:16:30.880 my perspective on all of it is just so different, 0:16:30.880 --> 0:16:32.920 and I'm really grateful that I met somebody who doesn't 0:16:33.000 --> 0:16:35.480 care that I was on a dating show, and you 0:16:35.480 --> 0:16:38.840 know that I put myself in this crazy world. You know. 0:16:39.520 --> 0:16:41.520 I think that's a classic example of like you said, 0:16:41.520 --> 0:16:44.120 it's so cliche, but I really do believe that everything 0:16:44.120 --> 0:16:47.280 happens for a reason. Like before I went on the show, 0:16:47.360 --> 0:16:48.920 I I fell in love with a guy, and I 0:16:48.920 --> 0:16:50.520 thought I was never going to find love again, and 0:16:50.560 --> 0:16:51.960 I thought it was the end of the world for me. 0:16:52.000 --> 0:16:54.920 And then fast forward three years later, I'm on the 0:16:54.960 --> 0:16:58.080 show and I get engaged and I was at a high, 0:16:58.360 --> 0:17:01.400 and then the relationship ends and again you're back out 0:17:01.400 --> 0:17:03.920 of low and you whenever you're at that point in 0:17:04.000 --> 0:17:05.560 your life, you think you're never going to find the 0:17:05.600 --> 0:17:08.359 person that you you're meant to be with. And I remember, like, 0:17:08.400 --> 0:17:11.600 I want one episode I did, uh my solo episode 0:17:11.600 --> 0:17:13.439 was girl talking. Amy was like, you know, I think 0:17:13.480 --> 0:17:14.960 you have to stop trying. I think you have to 0:17:15.040 --> 0:17:17.680 stop wanting it so much. And it's so true. I 0:17:17.840 --> 0:17:20.680 I kind of just said, you know, it'll It'll happen 0:17:20.720 --> 0:17:23.840 when it happens. And then it happens in a way 0:17:23.840 --> 0:17:25.520 that I really never thought I was going to date 0:17:25.520 --> 0:17:31.040 someone that slid into my d ms on Instagram, and 0:17:31.040 --> 0:17:32.919 and that's exactly how it happened. So Amy, thank you 0:17:32.960 --> 0:17:36.160 for the advice. What I couldn't hear you what I said, Amy, 0:17:36.160 --> 0:17:38.400 thank you for the advice. Oh yes, I can give 0:17:38.440 --> 0:17:44.440 great advice. Those who cannot do teach anything I do. 0:17:44.520 --> 0:17:47.280 But I can give people the best advice, the best advice. 0:17:47.280 --> 0:17:49.639 I'm like, Chill, you got this, everything's fine, just let 0:17:49.640 --> 0:17:51.520 it come to you, the universal take care of in 0:17:51.560 --> 0:17:53.080 the moment. That's not what you want to hear that 0:17:53.160 --> 0:17:56.000 in the moment you want to hear like chill, And 0:17:57.520 --> 0:17:59.960 I'm not chill, And I've cried the last twelve day. 0:18:00.119 --> 0:18:03.000 Is it's like I cannot take my own advice, but 0:18:03.119 --> 0:18:06.840 I'm working on Anyways, Analyst, thank you so much for 0:18:06.920 --> 0:18:10.600 joining us. We're happy that you're happy. And let me say, 0:18:10.840 --> 0:18:16.040 stunning couple. Yeah, he's very good looking. Did we did? 0:18:16.160 --> 0:18:19.520 We did get to see them together in their natural habitat. Um. 0:18:19.560 --> 0:18:22.960 It's great to see. And I'm not I'm saying this lovingly. 0:18:23.200 --> 0:18:25.320 I hope we never see you on another Bachelor's show again, 0:18:25.800 --> 0:18:27.919 because I hope this is a relationship to end all 0:18:27.960 --> 0:18:32.200 relations But thank you for joining us, and we'll see 0:18:32.200 --> 0:18:33.680 you on The Bachelor in Paradise for Union show in 0:18:33.680 --> 0:18:36.159 a couple of weeks. Yeah, yeah, okay cool. So for 0:18:36.200 --> 0:18:39.280 the listeners out there, we have two more guests from 0:18:39.359 --> 0:18:43.000 I Heart Radio's hit new podcast How Men Think. Um, 0:18:43.000 --> 0:18:45.720 we have to the co host Dmitri and Rick, and 0:18:45.760 --> 0:18:47.520 they are going to tell us, well, I guess we're 0:18:47.520 --> 0:18:48.680 just gonna dive into a little bit with them, but 0:18:48.720 --> 0:18:50.480 before we do that, we're going to take one quick 0:18:50.480 --> 0:18:54.520 break and then jump right into it with them. Okay, 0:18:54.520 --> 0:18:57.560 So we are back with two of the co hosts. 0:18:58.119 --> 0:19:02.640 Of the four hosts, there's five to a full car 0:19:03.720 --> 0:19:05.719 of how men think? Here with us, we have some 0:19:05.800 --> 0:19:08.760 Facebook questions. Both of these gentlemen are married, and so 0:19:08.800 --> 0:19:12.119