1
00:00:03,160 --> 00:00:06,720
Speaker 1: All right, break it down. If you ever have feelings

2
00:00:06,720 --> 00:00:10,079
Speaker 1: that you just fons Amy and Cat gotcha, Cob and

3
00:00:10,200 --> 00:00:14,280
Speaker 1: locking no brother ladies and fels do you just follow

4
00:00:14,360 --> 00:00:17,840
Speaker 1: Ann the spirit where it's all the real stuff to

5
00:00:18,000 --> 00:00:22,000
Speaker 1: the chill stuff and the m but Swayne, sometimes the

6
00:00:22,040 --> 00:00:25,759
Speaker 1: best thing you can do it just stop you feel things.

7
00:00:27,040 --> 00:00:29,400
Speaker 2: This is Feeling Things with Amy and Kat.

8
00:00:29,480 --> 00:00:37,120
Speaker 3: Have you Tuesday Feeling Things? Formerly? I wanted to say

9
00:00:37,520 --> 00:00:40,639
Speaker 3: formerly four Things with Amy Brown because someone someone might

10
00:00:40,640 --> 00:00:43,519
Speaker 3: be tuning in right now and they're like, which tuning in?

11
00:00:43,640 --> 00:00:46,000
Speaker 3: Is that totally a radio thing, like tuning into the

12
00:00:46,040 --> 00:00:50,919
Speaker 3: dialtive But someone might be streaming us, downloading us at

13
00:00:50,920 --> 00:00:54,240
Speaker 3: the moment and listening and they're like, wait, what is

14
00:00:54,360 --> 00:00:57,240
Speaker 3: feeling things? Because I'm just trying to listen to four

15
00:00:57,280 --> 00:01:00,240
Speaker 3: Things with Amy Brown. But welcome to Feeling Things, which

16
00:01:00,280 --> 00:01:03,320
Speaker 3: is formally four Things with Amy Brown. I'm Amy, I'm Kat,

17
00:01:03,760 --> 00:01:08,720
Speaker 3: and today's episode one of Feeling Things. But it's episode

18
00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:12,320
Speaker 3: six hundred and fifty. If we were still four things,

19
00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:14,520
Speaker 3: that's crazy, so we could look at it that way,

20
00:01:14,560 --> 00:01:16,759
Speaker 3: which I don't know how we're really going to count

21
00:01:16,800 --> 00:01:20,080
Speaker 3: it because it's on the same feed and we have

22
00:01:20,440 --> 00:01:22,600
Speaker 3: somewhere between. I thought it was twenty five million, but

23
00:01:22,640 --> 00:01:24,560
Speaker 3: I got an update from our PR person because she

24
00:01:24,600 --> 00:01:27,040
Speaker 3: was putting together a press release, and it said nearly

25
00:01:27,080 --> 00:01:31,400
Speaker 3: twenty seven million downloads. But if you're listening right now,

26
00:01:32,040 --> 00:01:34,720
Speaker 3: and this is episode one of Feeling Things, and someone's

27
00:01:34,720 --> 00:01:39,000
Speaker 3: actually listening, then we have one download and counting. So

28
00:01:39,040 --> 00:01:42,360
Speaker 3: we're just excited that you're here. And if you have time,

29
00:01:42,480 --> 00:01:45,680
Speaker 3: or when you have time, if you can subscribe, follow

30
00:01:46,360 --> 00:01:49,920
Speaker 3: leave a review. That is very helpful, especially during this transition,

31
00:01:50,520 --> 00:01:55,320
Speaker 3: this makeover, this rebrand, and we're going to get into

32
00:01:55,360 --> 00:01:58,040
Speaker 3: a lot of different things today. One thing specifically that

33
00:01:58,120 --> 00:02:00,800
Speaker 3: is by request by Cat, which is about con artist,

34
00:02:00,840 --> 00:02:03,000
Speaker 3: but it's mostly because you think I'm getting conned.

35
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:06,440
Speaker 2: By your face fitness person. Right, We're going to go

36
00:02:06,480 --> 00:02:08,519
Speaker 2: through a checklist and see it could be true.

37
00:02:08,639 --> 00:02:11,799
Speaker 3: I paid money officially thirty days ago.

38
00:02:12,440 --> 00:02:14,640
Speaker 2: And are you getting something out of it? Well, we'll go,

39
00:02:14,639 --> 00:02:15,160
Speaker 2: we'll get into it.

40
00:02:15,240 --> 00:02:17,920
Speaker 3: We get when we go we get a con artist checklist.

41
00:02:18,360 --> 00:02:20,640
Speaker 3: I'll tell you kind of an email I got today

42
00:02:21,840 --> 00:02:24,639
Speaker 3: from them and I was like, oh, perfect timing. We're

43
00:02:24,680 --> 00:02:27,000
Speaker 3: also going to go over core emotions, and today will

44
00:02:27,040 --> 00:02:30,560
Speaker 3: be part one because Kat's the therapist here, so she

45
00:02:30,680 --> 00:02:33,720
Speaker 3: knows the basics. Did you learn the eight core emotions

46
00:02:33,760 --> 00:02:35,400
Speaker 3: in school or no?

47
00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:40,200
Speaker 2: Because there's not like an actual one eight feelings, eight emotions.

48
00:02:40,240 --> 00:02:42,799
Speaker 2: If you look on the internet, you're going to get

49
00:02:43,120 --> 00:02:47,760
Speaker 2: allion different answers. But there's a couple places that I've found,

50
00:02:47,960 --> 00:02:51,480
Speaker 2: well I use what works for me that it splits

51
00:02:51,480 --> 00:02:54,160
Speaker 2: them up into eight and then there's like sub sections,

52
00:02:54,200 --> 00:02:55,800
Speaker 2: so we're going to go through all of those.

53
00:02:56,200 --> 00:02:59,080
Speaker 3: So eight core emotions coming up, and it may seem

54
00:02:59,080 --> 00:03:02,160
Speaker 3: a little bit basic, but what's cool about our emotions?

55
00:03:02,200 --> 00:03:04,800
Speaker 3: Which we're going to cover the first four today and

56
00:03:04,840 --> 00:03:08,000
Speaker 3: then next Tuesday we'll do the other four. But feelings

57
00:03:08,040 --> 00:03:11,079
Speaker 3: can be a gift or they can be an impairment.

58
00:03:11,639 --> 00:03:13,160
Speaker 3: And so you might be like, oh, I don't need

59
00:03:13,200 --> 00:03:15,919
Speaker 3: to know the core feelings or I already know them.

60
00:03:16,080 --> 00:03:18,040
Speaker 3: Of course I've heard those before, but you may not

61
00:03:18,160 --> 00:03:19,880
Speaker 3: know the gift that they give you, and you may

62
00:03:19,919 --> 00:03:21,880
Speaker 3: not know the impairment that they give you. So that's

63
00:03:21,919 --> 00:03:23,240
Speaker 3: really what we're going to be going over.

64
00:03:23,200 --> 00:03:26,160
Speaker 2: Which that I feel like when you learn that, you're

65
00:03:26,360 --> 00:03:31,240
Speaker 2: more apt to actually feel the uncomfortable stuff because you

66
00:03:31,280 --> 00:03:32,680
Speaker 2: know that there's a gift in it, and sometimes it

67
00:03:32,760 --> 00:03:34,400
Speaker 2: just feels like, oh the sucks, you know.

68
00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:36,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean, and I want the gifts, like I'm

69
00:03:36,120 --> 00:03:37,640
Speaker 3: going to chase the gifts, like now that I know

70
00:03:37,680 --> 00:03:40,320
Speaker 3: there's gifts, like at the end of the tunnel, yeah,

71
00:03:40,320 --> 00:03:42,120
Speaker 3: I'm gonna be like, Okay, let's just feel this faster.

72
00:03:42,480 --> 00:03:45,480
Speaker 2: Like last week when you hurt me, that gave me a.

73
00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:49,080
Speaker 3: Gift, well, I didn't know that I felt hurt. I

74
00:03:49,160 --> 00:03:51,960
Speaker 3: felt hurt right, and then you were able to share

75
00:03:52,040 --> 00:03:54,240
Speaker 3: that with me, and hurt is one of the first

76
00:03:54,760 --> 00:03:56,520
Speaker 3: four that we're going to go over today. So we'll

77
00:03:56,560 --> 00:04:00,640
Speaker 3: share that story. And I learned something too in that

78
00:04:01,280 --> 00:04:04,480
Speaker 3: the faster you speak about it, the quicker it gets

79
00:04:04,520 --> 00:04:09,720
Speaker 3: resolved deep I mean, quote me, quote me, which obviously

80
00:04:09,880 --> 00:04:11,800
Speaker 3: that is exactly what happens. But so many times we

81
00:04:11,840 --> 00:04:14,520
Speaker 3: put things off or we don't want to bring it

82
00:04:14,560 --> 00:04:16,279
Speaker 3: up because we don't want to be a burden, or

83
00:04:16,279 --> 00:04:18,320
Speaker 3: we don't want to seem silly, or it's like, oh

84
00:04:18,440 --> 00:04:20,880
Speaker 3: is it us, which there was some of it going

85
00:04:20,920 --> 00:04:22,680
Speaker 3: on with you, and you were willing to address that

86
00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:25,640
Speaker 3: one on one with your therapist, which I can respect.

87
00:04:26,320 --> 00:04:28,599
Speaker 2: I wanted to make sure that it wasn't just my

88
00:04:28,720 --> 00:04:31,599
Speaker 2: stuff coming up before I brought it up to you,

89
00:04:32,279 --> 00:04:33,960
Speaker 2: but then we brought it up pretty quickly.

90
00:04:34,000 --> 00:04:35,200
Speaker 3: Well, you didn't even need to bring it up to

91
00:04:35,200 --> 00:04:36,640
Speaker 3: me because I brought it up to Yeah, we're giving

92
00:04:36,680 --> 00:04:39,359
Speaker 3: away the whole story, Okay, we'll do it when we

93
00:04:39,440 --> 00:04:43,559
Speaker 3: get into Hurt, and I do have a little side

94
00:04:43,560 --> 00:04:47,240
Speaker 3: story about my daughter, Sashira. She's seventeen. And you know,

95
00:04:47,279 --> 00:04:50,000
Speaker 3: we're starting to build like these segments, Like in a second,

96
00:04:50,000 --> 00:04:53,159
Speaker 3: we'll do the feeling of the day, so every Tuesday episode,

97
00:04:53,279 --> 00:04:55,400
Speaker 3: people will get a new feeling of the day that

98
00:04:55,400 --> 00:04:59,200
Speaker 3: we're going to focus on and talk about in today's word.

99
00:04:59,240 --> 00:05:00,720
Speaker 3: Like I never really thought about how that was an

100
00:05:00,720 --> 00:05:02,560
Speaker 3: actual feeling. I mean, i know I've used it like

101
00:05:02,680 --> 00:05:06,000
Speaker 3: I feel, but I'm like, wait, that's a feeling, like

102
00:05:06,040 --> 00:05:09,719
Speaker 3: where's the gift? So we'll go over that kind of second.

103
00:05:10,000 --> 00:05:12,720
Speaker 3: But as we were building out, like you know, things

104
00:05:12,760 --> 00:05:16,080
Speaker 3: we want to have, like in radio, we call them benchmarks,

105
00:05:16,160 --> 00:05:18,159
Speaker 3: so core things, when you tune in, you're gonna get it.

106
00:05:18,160 --> 00:05:19,600
Speaker 3: Like when Kat and I were doing the Fifth Thing,

107
00:05:19,640 --> 00:05:22,240
Speaker 3: the bonus episode for the Fourth Things podcast, we had

108
00:05:22,240 --> 00:05:25,640
Speaker 3: a quote every episode. So now on the Tuesday episodes,

109
00:05:26,279 --> 00:05:28,159
Speaker 3: you're gonna get a feeling of the day. And so

110
00:05:28,200 --> 00:05:29,599
Speaker 3: I was going over some of that was to share,

111
00:05:29,640 --> 00:05:31,919
Speaker 3: and she goes, can I have a segment on the podcast?

112
00:05:31,960 --> 00:05:33,560
Speaker 3: And I was like, what would your segment be? And

113
00:05:33,560 --> 00:05:35,200
Speaker 3: she goes, oh, I can talk about all kinds of things,

114
00:05:35,240 --> 00:05:37,839
Speaker 3: but I really like to discuss about that time that

115
00:05:38,480 --> 00:05:39,359
Speaker 3: you thought you knew.

116
00:05:39,200 --> 00:05:42,400
Speaker 2: That guy and you.

117
00:05:41,560 --> 00:05:43,880
Speaker 3: Were hanging out with that guy all the time, and

118
00:05:44,040 --> 00:05:46,480
Speaker 3: I knew all along, Like I knew right away this

119
00:05:46,520 --> 00:05:50,680
Speaker 3: is something's off, something's off, and how mom's gonna fall

120
00:05:50,720 --> 00:05:51,320
Speaker 3: for anything.

121
00:05:52,440 --> 00:05:54,360
Speaker 2: And I was like, oh, just to share it, that'd

122
00:05:54,400 --> 00:05:55,360
Speaker 2: be a good segment.

123
00:05:55,960 --> 00:05:58,520
Speaker 3: Well, I said, well, lucky for her, you're going over

124
00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:01,919
Speaker 3: a con artist checklist. This will apply to anything, whether

125
00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:06,599
Speaker 3: it's you know something you've signed up for, dating, a

126
00:06:06,680 --> 00:06:09,960
Speaker 3: work relationship. You can spot the con artists with the list.

127
00:06:10,000 --> 00:06:12,839
Speaker 3: But she really was easy. She knew to come on

128
00:06:12,880 --> 00:06:15,120
Speaker 3: and make a segment. Oh, she knew, and we talked

129
00:06:15,160 --> 00:06:19,560
Speaker 3: about it whenever I was severing that relationship, which is

130
00:06:19,600 --> 00:06:22,320
Speaker 3: a little backstory on that and I am not going

131
00:06:22,360 --> 00:06:24,280
Speaker 3: to get into the whole thing because I had to

132
00:06:24,279 --> 00:06:25,640
Speaker 3: shut it down and like to share that's not going

133
00:06:25,680 --> 00:06:28,680
Speaker 3: to be a segment. But I was spending time with

134
00:06:28,720 --> 00:06:31,880
Speaker 3: this one particular person and it turned out not to

135
00:06:31,920 --> 00:06:34,000
Speaker 3: be a healthy situation.

136
00:06:34,200 --> 00:06:35,200
Speaker 2: It's a good way to put it.

137
00:06:35,560 --> 00:06:39,360
Speaker 3: And she was sixteen at the time, and she knew it,

138
00:06:39,480 --> 00:06:42,680
Speaker 3: like she knew right away. She was, Oh, mom, I

139
00:06:42,760 --> 00:06:45,880
Speaker 3: kinda told you that from why didn't the beginning?

140
00:06:46,240 --> 00:06:48,279
Speaker 2: I know, she's she's an adult, she can make an

141
00:06:48,440 --> 00:06:49,000
Speaker 2: own decision.

142
00:06:49,120 --> 00:06:52,480
Speaker 3: She's like, I'm good at sniffing people out and figuring

143
00:06:52,480 --> 00:06:54,480
Speaker 3: out those details. So she wanted to come on and

144
00:06:54,520 --> 00:06:56,800
Speaker 3: share her thoughts about that. However, out of respect for

145
00:06:56,920 --> 00:06:59,320
Speaker 3: other people involved, Like, I don't think it'd be fair

146
00:06:59,320 --> 00:07:01,840
Speaker 3: for me to tell that entire story. Yeah, maybe I'll

147
00:07:01,880 --> 00:07:03,120
Speaker 3: feel differently in like a year.

148
00:07:03,360 --> 00:07:06,400
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's too close right now. And it's also one

149
00:07:06,440 --> 00:07:08,039
Speaker 2: of those things that the further away from it, the

150
00:07:08,040 --> 00:07:11,600
Speaker 2: funnier it gets, you know. Yes, Oh wait another year,

151
00:07:11,640 --> 00:07:12,640
Speaker 2: so I'll be even more funny.

152
00:07:12,760 --> 00:07:14,560
Speaker 3: I was thinking about that the other day. It's like, God,

153
00:07:14,720 --> 00:07:17,840
Speaker 3: how quickly our lives turn, because now I'm in a

154
00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:22,640
Speaker 3: completely different type of relationship, completely different type of person,

155
00:07:23,800 --> 00:07:30,280
Speaker 3: you know, like he's employed, it's a car stuff like that. Okay, okay,

156
00:07:30,360 --> 00:07:32,440
Speaker 3: feeling of the day, you ready for it? I'm ready. Okay,

157
00:07:32,720 --> 00:07:36,200
Speaker 3: we don't have any like fun. The feeling of the day.

158
00:07:36,280 --> 00:07:40,240
Speaker 2: Like a little extra song. Here is the feeling of

159
00:07:40,280 --> 00:07:40,720
Speaker 2: the day.

160
00:07:42,720 --> 00:07:47,160
Speaker 3: Okay, cat cat nailed it. Which, by the way, when

161
00:07:47,200 --> 00:07:49,600
Speaker 3: I get into the feeling of the day, which is ugly,

162
00:07:50,120 --> 00:07:52,560
Speaker 3: ugly is the feeling of the day. But Cat got

163
00:07:52,600 --> 00:07:54,400
Speaker 3: to my house and I was running a little behind

164
00:07:54,440 --> 00:07:58,000
Speaker 3: getting ready because I am drawing on my eyebrows right

165
00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:01,400
Speaker 3: now because I had them lasered off and now they're red.

166
00:08:01,480 --> 00:08:05,080
Speaker 3: The undertone is red like they're burnt off, like I

167
00:08:05,120 --> 00:08:07,560
Speaker 3: have a little bit of hair. But then underneath where

168
00:08:07,600 --> 00:08:11,640
Speaker 3: the microbladed, it's like a tattoo was lasered off and

169
00:08:11,680 --> 00:08:13,560
Speaker 3: the red part is left. So the red part is

170
00:08:13,560 --> 00:08:16,200
Speaker 3: going to get removed in like seven weeks.

171
00:08:16,440 --> 00:08:19,440
Speaker 2: But it oh be red for seven weeks. Yeah, okay,

172
00:08:19,600 --> 00:08:22,640
Speaker 2: And it's red well right now. Doesn't look bad because.

173
00:08:22,440 --> 00:08:26,040
Speaker 3: I put a layer of foundation over my brows and

174
00:08:26,120 --> 00:08:29,080
Speaker 3: then I put powder, and then I put a little

175
00:08:29,680 --> 00:08:32,480
Speaker 3: bronzer or something to give it a little sign of

176
00:08:32,520 --> 00:08:37,640
Speaker 3: color because my foundation's a little pale. Probably need to

177
00:08:37,960 --> 00:08:41,440
Speaker 3: upgrade that. And then I drew on my new brows. Well,

178
00:08:41,760 --> 00:08:43,080
Speaker 3: I drew them on the first time and they were

179
00:08:43,120 --> 00:08:44,840
Speaker 3: a little wonky, So then what do you do? I

180
00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:45,640
Speaker 3: have to start over.

181
00:08:46,480 --> 00:08:48,679
Speaker 2: So did you watch a tutorial.

182
00:08:49,720 --> 00:08:51,520
Speaker 3: No, it took me a minute to figure out this concoction.

183
00:08:51,720 --> 00:08:53,240
Speaker 3: Like I just kind of thought, well, I'm gonna draw

184
00:08:53,280 --> 00:08:55,559
Speaker 3: over the red and then I realized if I wipe

185
00:08:55,600 --> 00:08:58,920
Speaker 3: them out basically, and then I give myself more of

186
00:08:58,920 --> 00:08:59,840
Speaker 3: a blank canvas.

187
00:09:00,120 --> 00:09:01,800
Speaker 2: But that's what a lot of people that I see

188
00:09:01,800 --> 00:09:04,319
Speaker 2: on TikTok, that's what they do. And they have eyebrows,

189
00:09:04,600 --> 00:09:07,480
Speaker 2: but they put foundation completely over them and make it

190
00:09:07,480 --> 00:09:10,800
Speaker 2: look like they are bald, and then they start anew

191
00:09:11,240 --> 00:09:13,720
Speaker 2: and they make their eyebrows look how they want ahead

192
00:09:13,720 --> 00:09:16,680
Speaker 2: of the Well, some people just do this anyway, so

193
00:09:16,840 --> 00:09:19,360
Speaker 2: maybe you're just on the makeup trends. Also, I think

194
00:09:19,400 --> 00:09:22,160
Speaker 2: you need to shout out the lift and snatch because

195
00:09:22,160 --> 00:09:25,840
Speaker 2: you're still using it and I cannot I can't describe

196
00:09:25,840 --> 00:09:29,720
Speaker 2: how real they look. My strokes, Your strokes, Your strokes

197
00:09:29,720 --> 00:09:32,640
Speaker 2: are good. Yeah, it's a The brand is in y

198
00:09:33,000 --> 00:09:36,000
Speaker 2: X Nicks. Is it called Nicks or in my ex

199
00:09:36,040 --> 00:09:38,000
Speaker 2: I have no idea. I don't know because I think

200
00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:40,200
Speaker 2: I always read that as NYC in my head.

201
00:09:40,360 --> 00:09:44,080
Speaker 3: Okay, well it's even though it's an x Nicks. Yeah,

202
00:09:44,120 --> 00:09:48,200
Speaker 3: and lift and snatch is the brow like a pin

203
00:09:48,800 --> 00:09:52,400
Speaker 3: and it creates these lifelike strokes. But you got to

204
00:09:52,440 --> 00:09:54,560
Speaker 3: have a steady hand because so when I first started,

205
00:09:54,600 --> 00:09:57,760
Speaker 3: I was a little nervous, shaky, But now I've gotten

206
00:09:57,800 --> 00:10:02,679
Speaker 3: to where I'm like, yeah, you know, so, yeah, maybe

207
00:10:02,679 --> 00:10:04,080
Speaker 3: I have maybe there's a future for me.

208
00:10:04,320 --> 00:10:07,240
Speaker 2: And is that why the feeling of the day ugly? Yeah?

209
00:10:07,320 --> 00:10:10,040
Speaker 3: Well, you know, we have our emotional barometer box and

210
00:10:10,080 --> 00:10:12,040
Speaker 3: I was just flipping through some of them. When I

211
00:10:12,040 --> 00:10:14,720
Speaker 3: came across ugly. I resonated and I was like, Okay,

212
00:10:16,120 --> 00:10:19,080
Speaker 3: we're going to do this. So I dedicate this feeling

213
00:10:19,080 --> 00:10:23,040
Speaker 3: of the day to my brows. Feeling ugly isn't about looks.

214
00:10:23,200 --> 00:10:26,280
Speaker 3: It's about how we see ourselves when we're down. Our

215
00:10:26,320 --> 00:10:30,120
Speaker 3: mood distorts our reflection, making us focus on flaws that

216
00:10:30,200 --> 00:10:33,640
Speaker 3: aren't really there. Even the most beautiful people feel this

217
00:10:33,720 --> 00:10:36,920
Speaker 3: way when that happens. We don't need a makeover. We

218
00:10:36,960 --> 00:10:40,360
Speaker 3: need kindness, love and perspective. And if we can't find

219
00:10:40,360 --> 00:10:43,920
Speaker 3: that in ourselves, we can borrow it from someone who

220
00:10:43,920 --> 00:10:44,840
Speaker 3: sees us clearly.

221
00:10:45,559 --> 00:10:49,280
Speaker 2: I love that you picked this. I think I've never

222
00:10:49,520 --> 00:10:52,400
Speaker 2: seen these cards, so I never have read that and

223
00:10:52,480 --> 00:10:55,960
Speaker 2: have looked at ugly as an actual emotion. But I

224
00:10:56,000 --> 00:10:58,680
Speaker 2: do talk about, because I specialize in body image and

225
00:10:58,760 --> 00:11:01,640
Speaker 2: eating disorders, is that when people see themselves in a mirror,

226
00:11:01,679 --> 00:11:04,080
Speaker 2: they don't see what they look like, they see how

227
00:11:04,080 --> 00:11:06,520
Speaker 2: they're feeling. So I love this, And a lot of

228
00:11:06,520 --> 00:11:08,199
Speaker 2: times when we look in the mirror, we were like, Oh,

229
00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:10,240
Speaker 2: I need to lose weight, or I need to dye

230
00:11:10,320 --> 00:11:12,840
Speaker 2: my hair, or I need a new wardrobe, when really

231
00:11:13,160 --> 00:11:15,360
Speaker 2: it's what you're saying, it's I need to go do

232
00:11:15,440 --> 00:11:18,120
Speaker 2: something nice for myself, and if I come back in

233
00:11:18,160 --> 00:11:22,079
Speaker 2: like an hour, I might see something different. Yeah, it's crazy.

234
00:11:22,120 --> 00:11:25,160
Speaker 3: Try the dopamine dressing, Like, Yeah, instead of trying to

235
00:11:25,240 --> 00:11:28,880
Speaker 3: force some outfit to make yourself fit into, like a

236
00:11:28,960 --> 00:11:31,640
Speaker 3: trend or whatever's happening, or a color you thought you

237
00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:33,319
Speaker 3: wanted to wear, Like, go to your closet and get

238
00:11:33,320 --> 00:11:35,320
Speaker 3: a go to outfit that you know you feel good

239
00:11:35,360 --> 00:11:37,320
Speaker 3: in and put that on and then go in the

240
00:11:37,320 --> 00:11:40,240
Speaker 3: mirror and do what do they call it? The the

241
00:11:40,280 --> 00:11:43,760
Speaker 3: super woman pose? You're talking about where you stand in

242
00:11:43,800 --> 00:11:44,200
Speaker 3: the mirror.

243
00:11:44,240 --> 00:11:45,640
Speaker 2: What is that called power?

244
00:11:45,679 --> 00:11:47,640
Speaker 3: Post power post superwoman power?

245
00:11:47,640 --> 00:11:49,120
Speaker 2: I like superwoman better power.

246
00:11:49,880 --> 00:11:52,760
Speaker 3: Sometimes I when I'm doing my meditation.

247
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:56,520
Speaker 2: Sums up yourself. You know how some people.

248
00:11:56,480 --> 00:11:58,560
Speaker 3: Sit well, and a lot of times I do. But

249
00:11:58,600 --> 00:12:01,120
Speaker 3: I sit calmly with my palms up if I'm wanting

250
00:12:01,120 --> 00:12:04,240
Speaker 3: to receive, and palms down if I'm wanting to feel grounded.

251
00:12:04,800 --> 00:12:07,600
Speaker 3: And then other times I just stick my thumb straight

252
00:12:07,679 --> 00:12:09,520
Speaker 3: in the air with my eyes closed. But I put

253
00:12:09,559 --> 00:12:12,760
Speaker 3: my arms out really straight, and I'm trying to channel

254
00:12:12,800 --> 00:12:17,880
Speaker 3: my thumbs out into the It's like a little antenna.

255
00:12:17,960 --> 00:12:19,719
Speaker 2: I thought you were trying to like give yourself a

256
00:12:19,760 --> 00:12:20,319
Speaker 2: thumbs up.

257
00:12:20,720 --> 00:12:23,440
Speaker 3: No, oh, I don't try to receive the where I

258
00:12:23,440 --> 00:12:26,200
Speaker 3: got the waves, But sometimes I do. I do it,

259
00:12:26,240 --> 00:12:27,920
Speaker 3: and I think that that's my body saying like I

260
00:12:28,000 --> 00:12:29,800
Speaker 3: need it, like I don't have it in me today,

261
00:12:29,880 --> 00:12:32,120
Speaker 3: so like Lord, give it to me, Lord give it

262
00:12:32,160 --> 00:12:35,200
Speaker 3: to me, you know, fill me up, give me the energy.

263
00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:38,359
Speaker 3: And I picture it going like I have a visualization

264
00:12:38,480 --> 00:12:40,839
Speaker 3: of it going like through my thumb all the way

265
00:12:40,880 --> 00:12:42,400
Speaker 3: down my arm into my body.

266
00:12:42,520 --> 00:12:44,560
Speaker 2: I kind of did you learn that or you just.

267
00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,520
Speaker 3: I don't know where I learned it. I certainly didn't come.

268
00:12:46,600 --> 00:12:48,840
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't know if it was over time

269
00:12:48,920 --> 00:12:51,040
Speaker 3: in different meditations that I've done, if maybe you're random

270
00:12:51,080 --> 00:12:53,320
Speaker 3: one on YouTube someone's like, now stick your thumbs in

271
00:12:53,360 --> 00:12:53,880
Speaker 3: the air and.

272
00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:55,400
Speaker 2: You're like, okay, I'll do anything.

273
00:12:55,480 --> 00:12:58,440
Speaker 3: I mean, I definitely didn't call it an antenna or

274
00:12:58,480 --> 00:13:00,760
Speaker 3: who knows. It could have been a yoga class at

275
00:13:00,760 --> 00:13:04,400
Speaker 3: one point. Which part of this podcast flipping over from

276
00:13:04,440 --> 00:13:06,760
Speaker 3: Four Things to Feeling Things is just the evolution of

277
00:13:06,800 --> 00:13:10,480
Speaker 3: where we are and the direction my life is going.

278
00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:13,480
Speaker 3: Meeting you, having you as now a full time host

279
00:13:13,480 --> 00:13:15,680
Speaker 3: with me, and kind of what we want to share

280
00:13:15,720 --> 00:13:20,040
Speaker 3: with others and come alongside people in their journey of

281
00:13:20,480 --> 00:13:24,640
Speaker 3: growing and therapy and whatnot. And Kat had a podcast

282
00:13:24,640 --> 00:13:26,920
Speaker 3: called You Need Therapy, and she has set that aside

283
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:29,040
Speaker 3: and now here with us. So this is going to

284
00:13:29,080 --> 00:13:30,640
Speaker 3: be like a mixture of what we were doing on

285
00:13:30,679 --> 00:13:34,560
Speaker 3: Four Things and You Need Therapy and you'll see it.

286
00:13:34,600 --> 00:13:36,600
Speaker 3: That's the plan now, but we may continue to evolve.

287
00:13:36,600 --> 00:13:38,760
Speaker 3: But speaking of evolution, I was thinking back when I

288
00:13:38,800 --> 00:13:41,600
Speaker 3: first started doing yoga, way way way, way way back

289
00:13:41,600 --> 00:13:44,280
Speaker 3: in the day in Austin. I went too this one

290
00:13:44,320 --> 00:13:47,840
Speaker 3: class where they had gongs and they were laying there

291
00:13:48,000 --> 00:13:51,320
Speaker 3: and then they served this little tea afterwards, and I'm like,

292
00:13:51,520 --> 00:13:53,200
Speaker 3: I couldn't get the heck out of there fast enough.

293
00:13:53,240 --> 00:13:56,040
Speaker 3: But that was your first experience, yeah, because it was

294
00:13:56,040 --> 00:13:58,120
Speaker 3: this yoga studio sort of close to my mom's house.

295
00:13:58,120 --> 00:14:02,760
Speaker 3: So I decided to go, and I was terrified, like

296
00:14:02,800 --> 00:14:05,439
Speaker 3: I thought they had a gong. I remember even going

297
00:14:05,440 --> 00:14:07,080
Speaker 3: on the Bobby buoncher the next day and I'm like,

298
00:14:07,240 --> 00:14:10,439
Speaker 3: I don't know where I went, guys, but it was crazy,

299
00:14:10,760 --> 00:14:13,600
Speaker 3: like we were laying down and then we kind of

300
00:14:13,640 --> 00:14:16,959
Speaker 3: doing and unison. Yeah, we did a flow practice, but

301
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,520
Speaker 3: then between the gong and the kool aid at the end,

302
00:14:19,960 --> 00:14:23,160
Speaker 3: you can't go right. But that's what it felt to me.

303
00:14:23,840 --> 00:14:26,760
Speaker 3: And now I'd be like, sign me up, Like where

304
00:14:26,840 --> 00:14:27,480
Speaker 3: is this classic?

305
00:14:29,320 --> 00:14:30,720
Speaker 2: Nobody uses gongs anymore.

306
00:14:30,880 --> 00:14:33,280
Speaker 3: I'm like, I want to breathe in unison? Yeah, are

307
00:14:33,280 --> 00:14:34,000
Speaker 3: we gonna chant?

308
00:14:34,600 --> 00:14:36,960
Speaker 2: Because it probably felt very different. So You're like, this

309
00:14:37,120 --> 00:14:39,440
Speaker 2: is weird. I gotta get out. And now you've You've

310
00:14:39,480 --> 00:14:40,760
Speaker 2: embraced so many different things.

311
00:14:40,880 --> 00:14:43,640
Speaker 3: So now I've evolved to where I stick my thumbs

312
00:14:43,640 --> 00:14:46,600
Speaker 3: in the air and channel the energy. I've also evolved

313
00:14:46,600 --> 00:14:51,000
Speaker 3: to where I'm doing face fitness in lua botox.

314
00:14:51,640 --> 00:14:52,080
Speaker 2: Yeah.

315
00:14:52,120 --> 00:14:56,960
Speaker 3: I think the last time I got injected was six

316
00:14:57,680 --> 00:14:58,520
Speaker 3: six months ago.

317
00:14:59,200 --> 00:15:01,160
Speaker 2: Yeah, six months sober.

318
00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:04,880
Speaker 3: Six months clean from botox. I may go back to it.

319
00:15:04,920 --> 00:15:07,760
Speaker 3: I'm not antiet at all, Like if somebody wants to

320
00:15:07,760 --> 00:15:09,320
Speaker 3: get it, but for me, I wanted to know my

321
00:15:09,400 --> 00:15:13,720
Speaker 3: new baseline. And so for the last three months, so

322
00:15:13,880 --> 00:15:17,720
Speaker 3: January February March, I'm doing face fitness. The first two

323
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:21,800
Speaker 3: months I was doing free things on YouTube. The month

324
00:15:21,840 --> 00:15:23,800
Speaker 3: of March I was doing.

325
00:15:23,720 --> 00:15:25,920
Speaker 2: A paid course. You dove right in.

326
00:15:26,160 --> 00:15:28,000
Speaker 3: And Kat thinks that I'm being conned.

327
00:15:28,280 --> 00:15:31,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, So we're going to go over a list of

328
00:15:32,000 --> 00:15:34,680
Speaker 2: things that might indicate that you're being conned by somebody,

329
00:15:34,720 --> 00:15:37,880
Speaker 2: and then we're going to keep your tally and based

330
00:15:37,920 --> 00:15:41,040
Speaker 2: on your score, we're gonna vote. I'm gonna vote if

331
00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:44,680
Speaker 2: you're my scam score, your scam score, we'll see if

332
00:15:45,160 --> 00:15:47,200
Speaker 2: you got conned or not. But before we do that,

333
00:15:47,240 --> 00:15:49,040
Speaker 2: I do want to say I don't know if I've

334
00:15:49,040 --> 00:15:52,760
Speaker 2: said this before, but you doing the no botox is

335
00:15:52,800 --> 00:15:55,960
Speaker 2: a big deal. I feel like because you've and I

336
00:15:56,000 --> 00:15:57,760
Speaker 2: mean I'll pat myself on the back too because I'm

337
00:15:57,800 --> 00:16:01,000
Speaker 2: doing it. Too, But I have been getting botox for

338
00:16:01,040 --> 00:16:02,680
Speaker 2: a couple of years, and you get used to your

339
00:16:02,680 --> 00:16:06,120
Speaker 2: face looking a certain way, and so stopping doing that

340
00:16:06,280 --> 00:16:09,200
Speaker 2: it is like you have to get used to that again.

341
00:16:09,320 --> 00:16:11,920
Speaker 2: So I think it's a big deal that you're attempting this.

342
00:16:12,040 --> 00:16:14,200
Speaker 2: Even if you go back to it, it's just, hey,

343
00:16:14,240 --> 00:16:16,440
Speaker 2: I want to make sure that this is something I

344
00:16:16,440 --> 00:16:17,000
Speaker 2: still want to.

345
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:19,160
Speaker 3: Do, which I'll touch on the fact that the reason

346
00:16:19,200 --> 00:16:23,400
Speaker 3: why I decided to get my brows lasered off, my

347
00:16:23,440 --> 00:16:25,760
Speaker 3: micro bladed brows is because I stopped the botox and

348
00:16:25,880 --> 00:16:28,920
Speaker 3: my forehead changed. So you happen to be listening for

349
00:16:28,960 --> 00:16:31,680
Speaker 3: the first day. I've talked about this in previous episodes,

350
00:16:31,680 --> 00:16:33,520
Speaker 3: but I'll just give you that tiny bit of information

351
00:16:33,560 --> 00:16:35,520
Speaker 3: because you might be like, why would you get your

352
00:16:35,560 --> 00:16:38,760
Speaker 3: brows micro bladed and then have them lasered off. Well,

353
00:16:39,840 --> 00:16:41,960
Speaker 3: nobody tells you. Nobody tells you when you go get

354
00:16:41,960 --> 00:16:44,880
Speaker 3: a microbladed with botox that then when your forehead starts

355
00:16:44,880 --> 00:16:48,040
Speaker 3: to shift because it's not frozen anymore, your brows can

356
00:16:48,520 --> 00:16:50,520
Speaker 3: be wonky. And so that was happening to me. So

357
00:16:50,560 --> 00:16:52,000
Speaker 3: I was like, I need a fresh start.

358
00:16:52,320 --> 00:16:55,520
Speaker 2: So thank you for spreading awareness. To that because people

359
00:16:55,960 --> 00:16:57,360
Speaker 2: might be like, oh, I'm going to stop this too,

360
00:16:57,440 --> 00:16:59,080
Speaker 2: and then they're like oh no now.

361
00:16:59,280 --> 00:17:02,360
Speaker 3: But it may not. Everybody's foreheads different.

362
00:17:02,760 --> 00:17:05,000
Speaker 2: I don't depending on where your wrinkles are, because I

363
00:17:05,200 --> 00:17:07,639
Speaker 2: mine didn't move because I my it was my eleven

364
00:17:07,840 --> 00:17:09,440
Speaker 2: wasn't as as now pronounced.

365
00:17:09,440 --> 00:17:10,760
Speaker 3: I can give you an exercise for that.

366
00:17:11,400 --> 00:17:15,000
Speaker 2: Okay, great, did you get that from your front?

367
00:17:15,359 --> 00:17:18,240
Speaker 3: So you take this hook and then you press like

368
00:17:18,280 --> 00:17:19,920
Speaker 3: but you build it real good and you can even

369
00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:22,880
Speaker 3: do a vibrating sensation and then you go all.

370
00:17:22,800 --> 00:17:23,280
Speaker 2: The way up.

371
00:17:23,280 --> 00:17:25,320
Speaker 3: But you've got to really get deep into the muscle,

372
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:26,240
Speaker 3: deep into.

373
00:17:26,040 --> 00:17:28,919
Speaker 2: The So before we go into this list, can you

374
00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,879
Speaker 2: tell me where you found this person? Did she have

375
00:17:31,880 --> 00:17:34,119
Speaker 2: like a credential or TikTok? Got it?

376
00:17:35,000 --> 00:17:41,280
Speaker 3: Yeah? I think she has uh sort of training in anatomy,

377
00:17:41,800 --> 00:17:44,640
Speaker 3: in kinesiology. I don't know where she received her letters,

378
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:46,960
Speaker 3: but you know, like she has a certificate.

379
00:17:47,000 --> 00:17:50,359
Speaker 2: I'm sure, Okay, I haven't seen it. Okay, before we

380
00:17:50,359 --> 00:17:53,480
Speaker 2: get into this, let's between a certificate and a degree.

381
00:17:54,480 --> 00:17:57,720
Speaker 3: But she also has one of these cute little skeletons

382
00:17:58,080 --> 00:17:59,640
Speaker 3: and she knows all.

383
00:17:59,480 --> 00:18:01,520
Speaker 2: Of the the bone, like she'll.

384
00:18:01,400 --> 00:18:05,400
Speaker 3: Be like your muscle and I'm like, oh. And then

385
00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:07,159
Speaker 3: my friend Claire was telling her the other day. I

386
00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:09,879
Speaker 3: was like, you want to massage this? And then Claire

387
00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:13,280
Speaker 3: said that. She goes, oh, the Claire is a I

388
00:18:13,320 --> 00:18:16,919
Speaker 3: know she has degrees. But what I'm saying is Claire

389
00:18:17,000 --> 00:18:19,399
Speaker 3: said it, and it's the exact thing. She confirmed it,

390
00:18:19,440 --> 00:18:21,680
Speaker 3: which I don't know what. The reason why I don't

391
00:18:21,680 --> 00:18:23,440
Speaker 3: know exactly how to say it is because she's.

392
00:18:23,320 --> 00:18:27,960
Speaker 2: Foreign, so you can say in the foreign language Claire.

393
00:18:28,359 --> 00:18:30,399
Speaker 3: Claire said it and it sounded similar, and I'm like,

394
00:18:30,440 --> 00:18:33,200
Speaker 3: that's it. So yeah, she has an accent and her

395
00:18:33,200 --> 00:18:36,879
Speaker 3: English isn't great, so sometimes she's like, you know what's

396
00:18:36,960 --> 00:18:42,639
Speaker 3: this called? She's like, oh, your teeth or or you

397
00:18:42,680 --> 00:18:44,760
Speaker 3: know what's that You need to get a pull your

398
00:18:44,760 --> 00:18:49,240
Speaker 3: hair back with a hairband, stuff like that.

399
00:18:49,320 --> 00:18:53,200
Speaker 2: So it's in English. Yes, okay, yes, okay, yes.

400
00:18:53,240 --> 00:18:55,800
Speaker 3: Because when I was doing some free YouTube, I was

401
00:18:55,840 --> 00:19:01,480
Speaker 3: having to read the subtitle trends to know what to do,

402
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:03,280
Speaker 3: which was a lot of work because I was like

403
00:19:03,359 --> 00:19:05,919
Speaker 3: trying to like massage my face and read. I just

404
00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:09,440
Speaker 3: want to be told. So she has who knows, maybe

405
00:19:09,480 --> 00:19:11,439
Speaker 3: she has a million something on TikTok, she has over

406
00:19:11,480 --> 00:19:15,639
Speaker 3: a million on Instagram, she's on YouTube with millions of views,

407
00:19:15,680 --> 00:19:18,720
Speaker 3: and then she has a course. Okay, so the course

408
00:19:18,760 --> 00:19:21,720
Speaker 3: is what I signed up for, so con artists checklist.

409
00:19:21,720 --> 00:19:24,719
Speaker 2: Let's go through it. And I have a affinity for

410
00:19:24,760 --> 00:19:27,639
Speaker 2: this type of stuff. As you know, I'm very skeptical

411
00:19:27,840 --> 00:19:31,600
Speaker 2: of everybody of everybody. But I learned that the hard

412
00:19:31,640 --> 00:19:34,479
Speaker 2: way though, because I wanted to trust everybody, and then

413
00:19:34,480 --> 00:19:36,840
Speaker 2: I got really into things and I'm like, oh my gosh,

414
00:19:36,880 --> 00:19:41,040
Speaker 2: they're lying. And I will say I got a certificate

415
00:19:41,520 --> 00:19:43,760
Speaker 2: for something back in the day, and as I'm getting

416
00:19:43,800 --> 00:19:45,840
Speaker 2: the certificate, I was like, I could do this with

417
00:19:45,920 --> 00:19:49,320
Speaker 2: my eyes closed. So I kind of learned that you

418
00:19:49,359 --> 00:19:52,199
Speaker 2: have to be aware of what certificate somebody has, you know,

419
00:19:52,840 --> 00:19:54,520
Speaker 2: because I didn't learn anything in that course, and I

420
00:19:54,560 --> 00:19:57,560
Speaker 2: could have been doing all kinds of things. Okay.

421
00:19:57,600 --> 00:20:00,919
Speaker 3: AnyWho, Yeah, I'll trust just about anybody. So which is

422
00:20:01,359 --> 00:20:01,880
Speaker 3: I mean.

423
00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,560
Speaker 2: I'm not better that You're not worse, it's just different.

424
00:20:06,280 --> 00:20:08,800
Speaker 3: No, I mean I feel like you're probably missing out

425
00:20:08,800 --> 00:20:14,680
Speaker 3: on a lot, which is back to Stashira's segment idea

426
00:20:14,720 --> 00:20:17,680
Speaker 3: that she wanted where she's like mama fall for anything.

427
00:20:17,400 --> 00:20:21,520
Speaker 2: Probably a lot. Okay, Well, let's go through. This is

428
00:20:21,600 --> 00:20:24,280
Speaker 2: just a little checklist of things that might signify that

429
00:20:24,359 --> 00:20:26,639
Speaker 2: somebody is conning you or manipulating you.

430
00:20:26,840 --> 00:20:27,119
Speaker 3: Okay.

431
00:20:27,200 --> 00:20:28,960
Speaker 2: So I'm going to read them, and you're going to

432
00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:31,840
Speaker 2: tell me yes or notice is fit? And so like,

433
00:20:31,880 --> 00:20:44,600
Speaker 2: maybe why I'm going to read them and you're going

434
00:20:44,680 --> 00:20:47,080
Speaker 2: to tell me yes or notice is fit? Okay, And

435
00:20:47,320 --> 00:20:49,879
Speaker 2: so like maybe why does it seem too good to

436
00:20:49,920 --> 00:20:51,280
Speaker 2: be true? Yes?

437
00:20:51,960 --> 00:20:55,200
Speaker 3: Because well, I mean, now that I think about it,

438
00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:59,120
Speaker 3: but I think that I'm like, wow, you can really

439
00:20:59,160 --> 00:21:02,480
Speaker 3: achieve these results by just massaging your face every day?

440
00:21:02,520 --> 00:21:03,760
Speaker 3: Like I guess at the end of the day, it

441
00:21:03,760 --> 00:21:05,639
Speaker 3: does seem too good to be true.

442
00:21:05,560 --> 00:21:08,840
Speaker 2: Like she's over promising, but it still could be possible. Okay.

443
00:21:08,880 --> 00:21:10,680
Speaker 2: So it's not crazy. It's not like we'll make you

444
00:21:10,720 --> 00:21:14,080
Speaker 2: look like you're seven. It's like we can make you

445
00:21:14,119 --> 00:21:17,680
Speaker 2: look like you have botox by just these three simple Right.

446
00:21:17,880 --> 00:21:20,399
Speaker 3: This is where I struggle because I have my I

447
00:21:20,520 --> 00:21:22,520
Speaker 3: want to give this a go, and I'm trying anything

448
00:21:22,600 --> 00:21:26,080
Speaker 3: brain and like, I think it's possible, but also could

449
00:21:26,119 --> 00:21:27,120
Speaker 3: it be too good to be true?

450
00:21:27,480 --> 00:21:27,720
Speaker 2: Yes?

451
00:21:27,800 --> 00:21:29,679
Speaker 3: So I'm just answering, honestly, okay, like at the end

452
00:21:29,680 --> 00:21:31,600
Speaker 3: of the day, yes, okay, okay.

453
00:21:32,320 --> 00:21:36,120
Speaker 2: Are they promising guaranteed results with no risk?

454
00:21:37,560 --> 00:21:41,600
Speaker 3: No, they're not promising guaranteed results. Everybody's a different starting stage,

455
00:21:41,600 --> 00:21:43,800
Speaker 3: is she said, in different ages?

456
00:21:43,920 --> 00:21:47,800
Speaker 2: And okay? Do they make you feel like you're broken

457
00:21:48,119 --> 00:21:51,639
Speaker 2: or incomplete without using their thing that they're selling on

458
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:52,840
Speaker 2: the method? No? Okay?

459
00:21:54,680 --> 00:21:56,720
Speaker 3: Am I not getting called? So far?

460
00:21:56,840 --> 00:21:59,960
Speaker 2: You're doing pretty good. Is there a sense of urgent

461
00:22:00,080 --> 00:22:03,080
Speaker 2: see or pressure to buy now or you're going to

462
00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:06,040
Speaker 2: miss out on something? Yes? Okay, what's that? Yes? She

463
00:22:06,160 --> 00:22:07,679
Speaker 2: said that it was sold out and you were got

464
00:22:07,720 --> 00:22:09,160
Speaker 2: on a wait list and then all of a sudden

465
00:22:09,160 --> 00:22:09,720
Speaker 2: you're in the file.

466
00:22:09,800 --> 00:22:11,440
Speaker 3: And then I got an email and it's like, oh,

467
00:22:11,560 --> 00:22:14,320
Speaker 3: a spot opened up. It's all virtual, by the way,

468
00:22:15,000 --> 00:22:16,840
Speaker 3: I don't know why it would fill up, you know

469
00:22:16,840 --> 00:22:17,200
Speaker 3: what I mean?

470
00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:18,000
Speaker 2: Wait?

471
00:22:18,560 --> 00:22:22,160
Speaker 3: So, yeah, it's true, I know. But you know, maybe

472
00:22:22,200 --> 00:22:23,280
Speaker 3: she good sales tectic.

473
00:22:23,359 --> 00:22:24,480
Speaker 2: Maybe she is.

474
00:22:24,440 --> 00:22:29,160
Speaker 3: Making sure that her inbox doesn't get overloaded with questions

475
00:22:29,200 --> 00:22:31,160
Speaker 3: from her current students.

476
00:22:31,680 --> 00:22:33,600
Speaker 2: That probably is what it was. Yeah, that could be it.

477
00:22:33,640 --> 00:22:35,960
Speaker 3: But yes, there was definitely an urgency like get it now,

478
00:22:36,280 --> 00:22:38,479
Speaker 3: and then the price slash.

479
00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:40,600
Speaker 2: Did you buy it before the price slashed.

480
00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:44,000
Speaker 3: Yes, but when you go no, no, no, sorry, I

481
00:22:44,040 --> 00:22:45,600
Speaker 3: bought it with.

482
00:22:45,440 --> 00:22:47,399
Speaker 2: The price slash, but it's like it was ever that

483
00:22:47,480 --> 00:22:48,480
Speaker 2: much money? Exactly?

484
00:22:48,600 --> 00:22:51,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, because I don't know, I because I never saw

485
00:22:51,119 --> 00:22:53,320
Speaker 3: that page. But once I had access to the page

486
00:22:53,320 --> 00:22:55,520
Speaker 3: because she had to send you a special link because

487
00:22:55,520 --> 00:22:58,040
Speaker 3: now I'm special. So then I clicked on the link

488
00:22:58,680 --> 00:23:02,840
Speaker 3: and it's said, you know, like nine hundred dollars, and

489
00:23:02,880 --> 00:23:04,520
Speaker 3: then it had a big line through it and it

490
00:23:04,600 --> 00:23:08,200
Speaker 3: was like, now only one hundred and ninety nine dollars.

491
00:23:08,600 --> 00:23:09,240
Speaker 3: What a deal?

492
00:23:10,640 --> 00:23:12,840
Speaker 2: Like I just saved seven hundred dollars.

493
00:23:13,200 --> 00:23:15,920
Speaker 3: Wow, I was on a wait list. I made it

494
00:23:15,960 --> 00:23:19,159
Speaker 3: in and now I got the special link and the

495
00:23:19,240 --> 00:23:23,000
Speaker 3: special links the price is slashed. So yeah.

496
00:23:23,240 --> 00:23:26,560
Speaker 2: That reminds me of infomercials growing up, when they're like

497
00:23:26,600 --> 00:23:28,479
Speaker 2: call the next five minutes and you can get this

498
00:23:28,560 --> 00:23:30,600
Speaker 2: for like four ninety nine, and then you go to

499
00:23:30,640 --> 00:23:32,800
Speaker 2: the grocery store and they're selling that same thing for

500
00:23:32,840 --> 00:23:34,840
Speaker 2: that same price. It's like just to get you to

501
00:23:34,880 --> 00:23:36,960
Speaker 2: buy it right then, smart business.

502
00:23:37,200 --> 00:23:39,280
Speaker 3: Whenever I think of an infomercial, did you ever see

503
00:23:39,280 --> 00:23:40,720
Speaker 3: that one way back in the day with that guy

504
00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:42,800
Speaker 3: that had the nut chopper, and then he would be

505
00:23:42,840 --> 00:23:47,040
Speaker 3: chopping the nuts and be late at night. My mom

506
00:23:47,080 --> 00:23:48,760
Speaker 3: and I don't know what we'd be watching late at night,

507
00:23:48,760 --> 00:23:52,800
Speaker 3: but he would always come on and it'd be like, oh, yeah,

508
00:23:52,840 --> 00:23:54,360
Speaker 3: my mom loved to buy stuff like that.

509
00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:57,960
Speaker 2: This is your mom.

510
00:23:59,040 --> 00:24:01,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, and he'd be like, you're gonna love my nuts

511
00:24:02,440 --> 00:24:03,680
Speaker 3: and even be chopping it.

512
00:24:03,800 --> 00:24:07,480
Speaker 2: And this is also a perfect example of how you

513
00:24:07,600 --> 00:24:10,000
Speaker 2: learn things from your environment, and so you are a

514
00:24:10,000 --> 00:24:12,840
Speaker 2: product of your environment. Right now, we don't have infomercials.

515
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:18,160
Speaker 2: We have TikTok scammers. Okay, do they call themselves things

516
00:24:18,240 --> 00:24:22,560
Speaker 2: like face healer or ageous oracle or just do they

517
00:24:22,600 --> 00:24:25,920
Speaker 2: call themselves any kind of like self proclaimed guru.

518
00:24:26,880 --> 00:24:33,280
Speaker 3: No, but she definitely says that other methods, like if

519
00:24:33,359 --> 00:24:36,199
Speaker 3: you're doing it this way, you're doing it wrong. But

520
00:24:36,240 --> 00:24:38,720
Speaker 3: then I've seen other people say this is how I

521
00:24:38,800 --> 00:24:41,080
Speaker 3: do it. So, but she doesn't have like a special

522
00:24:41,080 --> 00:24:43,320
Speaker 3: guru name. But does she have like what are her

523
00:24:43,359 --> 00:24:45,720
Speaker 3: like credentials? I don't know. Okay, I just know what's

524
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:48,359
Speaker 3: in her Instagram bio and I don't know that that's even.

525
00:24:48,400 --> 00:24:50,960
Speaker 2: Well, so this is this goes to those I don't

526
00:24:50,960 --> 00:24:51,600
Speaker 2: know if she's real.

527
00:24:51,600 --> 00:24:53,359
Speaker 3: Honestly, sometimes I'm like, is this AAI?

528
00:24:54,920 --> 00:24:56,919
Speaker 2: I think what gets a lot of people now is

529
00:24:57,160 --> 00:25:00,359
Speaker 2: anybody can call themselves any kind of like hell balistic

530
00:25:00,480 --> 00:25:03,800
Speaker 2: coach or this type of heal or this whatever, and

531
00:25:03,880 --> 00:25:07,399
Speaker 2: it sounds really fancy, but it's also something they just

532
00:25:07,520 --> 00:25:10,200
Speaker 2: made up, Like I could you could call yourself anything.

533
00:25:10,920 --> 00:25:14,160
Speaker 2: I could call myself anything and it could sound really good,

534
00:25:14,600 --> 00:25:18,440
Speaker 2: versus somebody who's really doing that's probably just like an esthetician,

535
00:25:19,240 --> 00:25:23,679
Speaker 2: you know. Yeah, Okay. Are they constantly posting testimonials that

536
00:25:23,800 --> 00:25:25,320
Speaker 2: sound a little too dramatic?

537
00:25:26,280 --> 00:25:29,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean some of the results are pretty dramatic.

538
00:25:29,680 --> 00:25:32,600
Speaker 3: So I feel like they either they cherry pick like

539
00:25:32,640 --> 00:25:35,080
Speaker 3: this was a good success story someone to highlight this,

540
00:25:35,600 --> 00:25:40,600
Speaker 3: or it's being photoshopped or something maybe I don't know, yeah.

541
00:25:40,720 --> 00:25:42,360
Speaker 2: Or it's AI the whole thing.

542
00:25:43,480 --> 00:25:46,080
Speaker 3: Well, no other people have joined because I see them.

543
00:25:46,400 --> 00:25:51,080
Speaker 3: I think I have a.

544
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:56,320
Speaker 2: Whole group of friends in my face fitness Facebook grouping. Okay.

545
00:25:56,720 --> 00:26:00,920
Speaker 2: Are they avoiding transparency about what actually is involved?

546
00:26:01,119 --> 00:26:04,000
Speaker 3: No, like you have to, They're pretty transparent. However, I

547
00:26:04,080 --> 00:26:06,400
Speaker 3: don't know how they have the time and the day,

548
00:26:06,800 --> 00:26:09,080
Speaker 3: like what I has been required of me the last

549
00:26:09,200 --> 00:26:11,879
Speaker 3: thirty days. We don't have this time.

550
00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:14,280
Speaker 2: I thought I was just seven, like seven minutes a day.

551
00:26:14,560 --> 00:26:18,679
Speaker 3: No, the lesson is thirty minutes ish, she said. She

552
00:26:18,720 --> 00:26:20,639
Speaker 3: tries to keep the lessons at twenty, but they always

553
00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:22,320
Speaker 3: go over. So let's just call it what it is.

554
00:26:22,359 --> 00:26:25,480
Speaker 3: They're thirty then, but before you start the thirty minute

555
00:26:25,480 --> 00:26:28,879
Speaker 3: you have to do a two minute lymphatic drainage exercise

556
00:26:28,920 --> 00:26:32,080
Speaker 3: which opens up your limbs. And so that's two minutes.

557
00:26:32,119 --> 00:26:35,320
Speaker 3: So now we're at thirty two. Then if you want

558
00:26:35,640 --> 00:26:39,880
Speaker 3: good results, she highly recommends the bonus exercises after that.

559
00:26:39,960 --> 00:26:42,359
Speaker 3: And so I'm like, this is every day. I used

560
00:26:42,359 --> 00:26:45,320
Speaker 3: to do this on top of you know, go on

561
00:26:45,800 --> 00:26:48,880
Speaker 3: a walk in the forest with the trees.

562
00:26:49,640 --> 00:26:50,800
Speaker 2: Is that part of it now?

563
00:26:51,359 --> 00:26:53,000
Speaker 3: Like, that's just another thing that I like to do

564
00:26:53,080 --> 00:26:56,400
Speaker 3: because I want to be with nature and I want

565
00:26:56,400 --> 00:26:59,960
Speaker 3: to have that hit of dope.

566
00:27:00,240 --> 00:27:02,800
Speaker 2: Can you do your drainage while you're on your walk?

567
00:27:03,520 --> 00:27:05,200
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you want to do your drainage right before

568
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:06,280
Speaker 3: you do your face fitness?

569
00:27:06,359 --> 00:27:09,679
Speaker 2: Okay? Do they discourage you from doing other things that

570
00:27:09,720 --> 00:27:10,200
Speaker 2: could help?

571
00:27:11,280 --> 00:27:13,040
Speaker 3: I haven't caught on to that yet. If she has,

572
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:15,760
Speaker 3: I don't. I don't think she said, like, don't do

573
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:18,040
Speaker 3: now she says, like, if you want to do washer,

574
00:27:18,080 --> 00:27:19,560
Speaker 3: if you want to put the oil on, she goes,

575
00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:21,199
Speaker 3: but I don't think you need any of that. But

576
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:22,560
Speaker 3: a lot of people are like, oh, I love the

577
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:26,399
Speaker 3: oil and the quasha. But she she's like, there's a

578
00:27:26,440 --> 00:27:27,240
Speaker 3: time and a place for.

579
00:27:27,200 --> 00:27:31,320
Speaker 2: That, okay. And then are they trying to become like

580
00:27:31,760 --> 00:27:35,480
Speaker 2: your go to person like for that? So it could

581
00:27:35,520 --> 00:27:37,720
Speaker 2: be like your friend, it could be like your like

582
00:27:39,200 --> 00:27:42,719
Speaker 2: mentor your are they trying to become something?

583
00:27:42,880 --> 00:27:44,879
Speaker 3: I mean, I guess sometimes when she says stuff like

584
00:27:44,880 --> 00:27:46,679
Speaker 3: that of like, okay, if you want to do that,

585
00:27:46,720 --> 00:27:50,760
Speaker 3: but you know, like that's not good. You need to

586
00:27:50,760 --> 00:27:51,480
Speaker 3: do what I'm doing.

587
00:27:52,040 --> 00:27:55,640
Speaker 2: So and then I also want to add, this is online,

588
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:58,800
Speaker 2: but if you wanted to like meet this person in person.

589
00:28:00,080 --> 00:28:01,679
Speaker 3: I don't know where. I don't even know where in

590
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:04,840
Speaker 3: the world she is, Like where, like, yeah, where in

591
00:28:04,880 --> 00:28:07,720
Speaker 3: the world does she reside? I think I saw something

592
00:28:07,760 --> 00:28:10,560
Speaker 3: the other day on TikTok about Miami. But then you know,

593
00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:12,720
Speaker 3: TikTok's weird, Like I couldn't figure out that video because

594
00:28:12,760 --> 00:28:14,280
Speaker 3: I don't even think it was herd that posted it.

595
00:28:14,560 --> 00:28:18,320
Speaker 3: You know, people repost other people's things, so I don't know.

596
00:28:18,760 --> 00:28:23,240
Speaker 2: Okay, so your test is done and I'm going to

597
00:28:23,400 --> 00:28:27,040
Speaker 2: be honest. You might not be getting scammed.

598
00:28:27,080 --> 00:28:31,000
Speaker 3: WHOA, okay, Okay, well then I'm just getting scammed on

599
00:28:31,080 --> 00:28:34,959
Speaker 3: time because I just completed the thirty days and we

600
00:28:35,000 --> 00:28:37,760
Speaker 3: get an email this morning like congratulations, you completed the

601
00:28:37,800 --> 00:28:40,080
Speaker 3: thirty days, and now for the next thirty days.

602
00:28:39,840 --> 00:28:41,320
Speaker 2: She wants you to sign up for someone else.

603
00:28:41,520 --> 00:28:44,600
Speaker 3: No, this is included. Oh, this is included a gift

604
00:28:44,640 --> 00:28:45,720
Speaker 3: from her.

605
00:28:46,400 --> 00:28:47,480
Speaker 2: She's giving you a gift.

606
00:28:47,680 --> 00:28:51,880
Speaker 3: The gift is for the next thirty days. Repeat it

607
00:28:52,560 --> 00:28:56,120
Speaker 3: the entire thing from day one to day three, because

608
00:28:56,160 --> 00:28:59,600
Speaker 3: now your hands are stronger, you know the techniques, so

609
00:28:59,640 --> 00:29:03,840
Speaker 3: you can do it better. And I'm like, wait a second, wait,

610
00:29:03,920 --> 00:29:04,960
Speaker 3: I have to do it again.

611
00:29:05,680 --> 00:29:06,760
Speaker 2: Well, you're gonna have to do it for the rest

612
00:29:06,760 --> 00:29:06,920
Speaker 2: of it.

613
00:29:07,200 --> 00:29:10,040
Speaker 3: There's my certificate. I just don't in my thirty days

614
00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:10,880
Speaker 3: like I want to.

615
00:29:10,960 --> 00:29:12,120
Speaker 2: You should be going to teach it now.

616
00:29:12,240 --> 00:29:15,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, but she said, we won't graduate until we do

617
00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:20,200
Speaker 3: it again. Oh and then maybe our body will be ready.

618
00:29:20,200 --> 00:29:21,920
Speaker 3: And what I have learned. Let me tell you, kat

619
00:29:22,000 --> 00:29:24,160
Speaker 3: Let me let me tell you a lot of our

620
00:29:24,280 --> 00:29:27,800
Speaker 3: wrinkles and what we're dealing with or sagging things in

621
00:29:27,920 --> 00:29:31,800
Speaker 3: the front part of our skull, which would be our face.

622
00:29:31,880 --> 00:29:33,920
Speaker 3: That's what we see, right. We have the part we

623
00:29:33,960 --> 00:29:36,920
Speaker 3: don't see, which is the back of our school where

624
00:29:36,920 --> 00:29:42,800
Speaker 3: our school meets our neck, the top of our our neck,

625
00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:48,640
Speaker 3: our shoulders. We spend more time massaging our trapezes, our

626
00:29:49,000 --> 00:29:53,880
Speaker 3: skylt like all these things that you don't see. We

627
00:29:53,920 --> 00:29:55,840
Speaker 3: spend so much time. And that's why she said, your

628
00:29:55,840 --> 00:29:58,280
Speaker 3: hands are stronger because some of the massages you really

629
00:29:58,320 --> 00:30:00,400
Speaker 3: have to get in there, and like your biceps tired,

630
00:30:00,400 --> 00:30:02,440
Speaker 3: and like your arms are up. We do all these,

631
00:30:02,480 --> 00:30:07,560
Speaker 3: like other things in these stretches, and sometimes a thirty

632
00:30:07,600 --> 00:30:10,760
Speaker 3: minute workout we won't even have touched our face. And

633
00:30:10,800 --> 00:30:13,080
Speaker 3: then I feel like that's a waste, but she says

634
00:30:13,120 --> 00:30:16,520
Speaker 3: it's not, because everything is playing a part and we

635
00:30:16,560 --> 00:30:19,760
Speaker 3: can see that. It's when we're relaxed back here, this

636
00:30:19,840 --> 00:30:23,480
Speaker 3: falls into place. When we're tight here, this SAgs.

637
00:30:23,560 --> 00:30:24,240
Speaker 2: I could see that.

638
00:30:24,320 --> 00:30:25,360
Speaker 3: So I'm not getting scamped.

639
00:30:25,400 --> 00:30:26,280
Speaker 2: Well you're not.

640
00:30:26,560 --> 00:30:27,120
Speaker 3: You're on board.

641
00:30:27,400 --> 00:30:27,960
Speaker 2: I could be.

642
00:30:28,040 --> 00:30:30,840
Speaker 3: I will send you the thirty days for just.

643
00:30:31,160 --> 00:30:32,480
Speaker 2: One hundred dollars.

644
00:30:33,560 --> 00:30:34,320
Speaker 3: I'll give you a deal.

645
00:30:34,640 --> 00:30:38,280
Speaker 2: Ninety nine, I get a special link. Yes. Yes. I

646
00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:40,720
Speaker 2: also think that you kind of reverse your answer on

647
00:30:40,760 --> 00:30:43,280
Speaker 2: some of these things, like you said it she hasn't promised.

648
00:30:43,280 --> 00:30:45,600
Speaker 2: Does it seem too good to be true? And then

649
00:30:46,160 --> 00:30:48,080
Speaker 2: you said that she is making you do a double

650
00:30:48,560 --> 00:30:51,320
Speaker 2: thirty days. Yeah, like she's making it seem like it's

651
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:55,360
Speaker 2: something that's not she wants it probably to be like oh, by.

652
00:30:55,280 --> 00:30:57,800
Speaker 3: This, I'm just saying the results sometimes seem too good

653
00:30:57,840 --> 00:30:59,800
Speaker 3: to be true, like we're not looking at other people's results,

654
00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:01,360
Speaker 3: like is this for real?

655
00:31:01,640 --> 00:31:01,840
Speaker 2: Yeah?

656
00:31:02,360 --> 00:31:03,640
Speaker 3: And then yeah, you could be true, like we know

657
00:31:03,720 --> 00:31:05,440
Speaker 3: at the time, like, dude, what it is you're could

658
00:31:05,440 --> 00:31:06,600
Speaker 3: be true? Nobody has time for this.

659
00:31:06,760 --> 00:31:09,920
Speaker 2: But also this is I think a key that I

660
00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:11,480
Speaker 2: don't know if this is happening or not. When you

661
00:31:11,520 --> 00:31:16,040
Speaker 2: are getting scammed, there's usually always like what's next, Like

662
00:31:16,160 --> 00:31:18,560
Speaker 2: she's making you do this thing again, but it doesn't

663
00:31:18,560 --> 00:31:19,760
Speaker 2: sound like she's charging any more money.

664
00:31:19,840 --> 00:31:22,440
Speaker 3: No, it's a gift, okay, but I feel like that means.

665
00:31:22,560 --> 00:31:24,440
Speaker 2: Here's a free gift, So then you'll buy this other.

666
00:31:24,320 --> 00:31:27,040
Speaker 3: Thing thirty days from now. It'll be like, remember that

667
00:31:27,040 --> 00:31:28,040
Speaker 3: free gift I gave you?

668
00:31:28,040 --> 00:31:30,320
Speaker 2: You owe me? Yeah, And then you're gonna feel guilty.

669
00:31:31,480 --> 00:31:34,200
Speaker 2: So that's one thing I would have people look out for.

670
00:31:34,280 --> 00:31:37,760
Speaker 2: If there is always something else and it keeps going

671
00:31:38,240 --> 00:31:42,040
Speaker 2: and you have you need them. If somebody's not a scammer,

672
00:31:42,760 --> 00:31:45,560
Speaker 2: they're gonna teach you the thing and then they're gonna

673
00:31:45,640 --> 00:31:47,800
Speaker 2: let you go be free on your own versus like

674
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:49,440
Speaker 2: I need you to stay with me and stay in

675
00:31:49,480 --> 00:31:51,240
Speaker 2: my tribe CULTI vibes.

676
00:31:51,320 --> 00:31:54,760
Speaker 3: You know, if I pack my bags and move to

677
00:31:54,800 --> 00:31:56,760
Speaker 3: wherever in the world.

678
00:31:56,520 --> 00:31:59,240
Speaker 2: The next step is in person, and I have to

679
00:31:59,280 --> 00:32:02,120
Speaker 2: go meet her this plane ticket to I don't know where.

680
00:32:02,600 --> 00:32:03,400
Speaker 2: You just show up.

681
00:32:03,600 --> 00:32:07,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, I will say my shoulders are more relaxed

682
00:32:07,200 --> 00:32:09,240
Speaker 3: and my posta is a little bit better, I feel like.

683
00:32:09,640 --> 00:32:12,520
Speaker 3: But I will say this checklist is good for anybody

684
00:32:12,560 --> 00:32:15,520
Speaker 3: that's you know, when you're following certain people on Instagram.

685
00:32:15,520 --> 00:32:18,840
Speaker 3: It could be just influencers that you follow and they're

686
00:32:19,000 --> 00:32:24,480
Speaker 3: talking about a particular product, and now there's there's I mean,

687
00:32:24,520 --> 00:32:27,320
Speaker 3: the spectrum is it's all over the place, but there

688
00:32:27,360 --> 00:32:29,520
Speaker 3: is one particular girl I started to follow a couple

689
00:32:29,520 --> 00:32:32,240
Speaker 3: of months ago, and I may unfollow because I've started

690
00:32:32,240 --> 00:32:35,680
Speaker 3: to realize I get hooked every single time, because I

691
00:32:35,680 --> 00:32:38,560
Speaker 3: think she's really good about that too good to be

692
00:32:38,600 --> 00:32:41,640
Speaker 3: true hook, and she gets me and like one thing,

693
00:32:41,880 --> 00:32:44,960
Speaker 3: she's into face fitness, and well, I guess probably a

694
00:32:45,040 --> 00:32:46,560
Speaker 3: lot of people that pop up in my account now

695
00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:49,240
Speaker 3: are face fitness because the algorithm, that's all it feeds me.

696
00:32:49,280 --> 00:32:50,960
Speaker 3: So I won't even pin this directly on her, but

697
00:32:51,000 --> 00:32:55,280
Speaker 3: so many people are like, I canceled my plastic surgery appointment,

698
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:58,160
Speaker 3: which who knows what her plastic surgery appointment was. Was

699
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,520
Speaker 3: it for botox? Because you can get botox at the

700
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:02,320
Speaker 3: plastic surgeon's office. So I don't know if she's claiming

701
00:33:02,360 --> 00:33:04,160
Speaker 3: she's about to go get a facelift or something, but

702
00:33:04,240 --> 00:33:08,440
Speaker 3: she said that was her hook. It's like, oh, someone

703
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:10,800
Speaker 3: canceled an appointment because of this. I'm going to pause

704
00:33:10,840 --> 00:33:12,840
Speaker 3: and watch, and then you know, she does like a

705
00:33:12,840 --> 00:33:15,480
Speaker 3: little temple massage here and like a nasal limn and

706
00:33:15,520 --> 00:33:17,840
Speaker 3: then it's like, oh, that's all you do every day

707
00:33:17,840 --> 00:33:19,920
Speaker 3: for three minutes, and you were able to cancel your

708
00:33:20,440 --> 00:33:23,040
Speaker 3: your appointment at the doctor for whatever it is you

709
00:33:23,040 --> 00:33:26,760
Speaker 3: wanted to change. But that's an example of one thing

710
00:33:27,280 --> 00:33:31,000
Speaker 3: that I've seen. And then they're good at in anything

711
00:33:31,000 --> 00:33:33,720
Speaker 3: they're trying to pitch, whether it's that you learn a

712
00:33:34,200 --> 00:33:36,960
Speaker 3: product or whatever, and some people just that's their gifts,

713
00:33:37,040 --> 00:33:38,840
Speaker 3: like they are really really good at it.

714
00:33:39,360 --> 00:33:42,080
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, and you just have to be aware. And

715
00:33:42,120 --> 00:33:45,840
Speaker 2: I think it's a different if it is taking resources

716
00:33:45,880 --> 00:33:49,480
Speaker 2: away from you that you actually don't have, that's one thing,

717
00:33:50,000 --> 00:33:53,680
Speaker 2: Like this is kind of harmless. I mean besides the time, right,

718
00:33:54,800 --> 00:33:56,360
Speaker 2: but if you like had to sell your house because

719
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:59,440
Speaker 2: you had to afford this face fitness score, of course, right,

720
00:33:59,680 --> 00:34:02,680
Speaker 2: that you're being scammed and also you need some we

721
00:34:02,720 --> 00:34:04,160
Speaker 2: need help you in other ways.

722
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:07,200
Speaker 3: Okay, well I think you concluded I'm currently not getting

723
00:34:07,280 --> 00:34:10,120
Speaker 3: scammed at the moment, so yeah, we can high five

724
00:34:10,200 --> 00:34:13,480
Speaker 3: on that and then move on to core emotions and

725
00:34:13,600 --> 00:34:16,879
Speaker 3: speak Core Emotions Part one. Yeah, that's a ang.

726
00:34:17,040 --> 00:34:19,080
Speaker 2: I love talking about feelings first of all, so I

727
00:34:19,120 --> 00:34:22,359
Speaker 2: could do this all day long, but I wanted to start.

728
00:34:22,400 --> 00:34:24,920
Speaker 2: I think we both wanted to start with feelings because

729
00:34:24,920 --> 00:34:26,960
Speaker 2: we're going to be obviously it's feelings things. We're going

730
00:34:27,040 --> 00:34:29,520
Speaker 2: to be talking about them all the time and relating

731
00:34:29,560 --> 00:34:34,800
Speaker 2: things back and learning how to identify my own feelings

732
00:34:34,880 --> 00:34:37,680
Speaker 2: and learning how to like sit in my own feelings

733
00:34:37,719 --> 00:34:41,680
Speaker 2: has transformed I think my relationships in my life in general,

734
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:46,759
Speaker 2: because we're getting these gifts. So I like to describe

735
00:34:47,040 --> 00:34:51,200
Speaker 2: feelings as guides or tools. So they're not good or bad.

736
00:34:51,400 --> 00:34:54,120
Speaker 2: They're not right or wrong. If once you see this list,

737
00:34:54,160 --> 00:34:56,680
Speaker 2: you're gonna look at it and you're gonna say, Catherine,

738
00:34:56,960 --> 00:35:01,600
Speaker 2: there's only one good one. They're all the same, They're all.

739
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:03,520
Speaker 3: They are not good or bad. Yeah, they all have

740
00:35:03,560 --> 00:35:04,080
Speaker 3: an offering.

741
00:35:04,120 --> 00:35:05,600
Speaker 2: They all have an offering, and they all have an

742
00:35:05,600 --> 00:35:08,320
Speaker 2: impairment if you choose not to feel them. And the

743
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:12,200
Speaker 2: visual I like to give people is feelings are very

744
00:35:12,280 --> 00:35:14,719
Speaker 2: similar to the lights on the dashboard of your car.

745
00:35:14,880 --> 00:35:18,680
Speaker 2: So if you're driving down the road, and this resonates

746
00:35:18,719 --> 00:35:23,640
Speaker 2: with me a lot because I get so frustrated and

747
00:35:23,680 --> 00:35:27,680
Speaker 2: I feel so inconvenienced when a light pops up. So

748
00:35:27,880 --> 00:35:30,120
Speaker 2: I'm driving down the road and maybe a check engine

749
00:35:30,200 --> 00:35:33,280
Speaker 2: or my my change your oil light or something pops

750
00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:36,279
Speaker 2: up on my car. All that is doing is saying, hey,

751
00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:39,560
Speaker 2: there's something that you need to go look at or

752
00:35:39,719 --> 00:35:43,760
Speaker 2: check or pay attention to. So it's a tool, right,

753
00:35:43,840 --> 00:35:46,120
Speaker 2: that is, it's a guide that's leading you to what

754
00:35:46,160 --> 00:35:49,400
Speaker 2: your car needs. Yes, if you have to change my oil.

755
00:35:50,080 --> 00:35:52,840
Speaker 2: Probably inconvenient. I might it might like I don't know,

756
00:35:52,880 --> 00:35:56,760
Speaker 2: if I'm on a road trip, set me back an hour. However,

757
00:35:56,920 --> 00:36:00,000
Speaker 2: if I don't get that oil changed and my oil

758
00:36:01,880 --> 00:36:05,960
Speaker 2: is gone, but con guess what, my car is going

759
00:36:06,000 --> 00:36:07,480
Speaker 2: to blow up and I'm not going to ever get

760
00:36:07,480 --> 00:36:09,799
Speaker 2: to where I'm going, which I have had my car

761
00:36:09,840 --> 00:36:12,080
Speaker 2: stop in the middle of the road one time because

762
00:36:12,080 --> 00:36:15,000
Speaker 2: I had no oil and it was so inconvenient, and

763
00:36:15,040 --> 00:36:17,520
Speaker 2: it led me from I was in a rush and

764
00:36:17,560 --> 00:36:19,120
Speaker 2: I wanted to get to my full day of work

765
00:36:19,160 --> 00:36:20,520
Speaker 2: and I don't want to be late for my clients. And

766
00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:24,000
Speaker 2: then because I didn't just get my oil change when

767
00:36:24,000 --> 00:36:26,279
Speaker 2: I should have, I actually missed that whole day of work.

768
00:36:27,000 --> 00:36:29,319
Speaker 2: So you're going to be forced to pay attention to

769
00:36:29,360 --> 00:36:31,799
Speaker 2: it one way or another. Feelings are the same way,

770
00:36:31,880 --> 00:36:34,719
Speaker 2: So you have a feeling it's just signaling, Hey, there's

771
00:36:34,760 --> 00:36:37,480
Speaker 2: something that you need to pay attention to, that you

772
00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:39,560
Speaker 2: want to look at, that you just want to care for.

773
00:36:40,360 --> 00:36:43,279
Speaker 2: Could be inconvenient, but also if you pay attention to it,

774
00:36:43,320 --> 00:36:46,160
Speaker 2: you might get something that you're missing or needing.

775
00:36:47,320 --> 00:36:48,799
Speaker 3: I think one thing to keep in mind too, is

776
00:36:49,000 --> 00:36:52,160
Speaker 3: people that grew up in a really dysfunctional environment. They

777
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:56,440
Speaker 3: learned not to feel, and so there's a lot of

778
00:36:56,520 --> 00:37:00,480
Speaker 3: us walking around not me. I just mean humans that

779
00:37:00,880 --> 00:37:04,319
Speaker 3: don't even know how to feel. And I guess I

780
00:37:04,400 --> 00:37:05,960
Speaker 3: say not me because I don't like to put my

781
00:37:06,000 --> 00:37:08,480
Speaker 3: home as like dysfunctional. But everybody had their own dysfunction,

782
00:37:08,880 --> 00:37:15,719
Speaker 3: and I do think that my parents were emotionally unavailable.

783
00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:20,120
Speaker 2: Dysfunctional doesn't always mean like right, like creative and bad.

784
00:37:20,160 --> 00:37:24,640
Speaker 2: It's really honestly, we're all paying attention. There's dysfunction in

785
00:37:24,719 --> 00:37:25,760
Speaker 2: every system, right.

786
00:37:25,640 --> 00:37:27,239
Speaker 3: And that's why I had to rewind and sort of

787
00:37:27,239 --> 00:37:29,960
Speaker 3: stop myself because I'm like a lot of us walking

788
00:37:29,960 --> 00:37:30,880
Speaker 3: around because dysfunction.

789
00:37:30,920 --> 00:37:31,440
Speaker 2: I'm like, not me.

790
00:37:32,120 --> 00:37:33,640
Speaker 3: But then I was like, shoot, I don't want to

791
00:37:33,680 --> 00:37:36,200
Speaker 3: discount that. Yeah, there was some dysfunction in my home,

792
00:37:36,239 --> 00:37:39,000
Speaker 3: and I, as a parent, have created some dysfunction for

793
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:42,239
Speaker 3: my kids. And it doesn't mean that you're a bad

794
00:37:42,280 --> 00:37:45,000
Speaker 3: parent or my parents were bad. Now, some people grew

795
00:37:45,040 --> 00:37:47,560
Speaker 3: up in environment where, yeah, you'd probably classify their their

796
00:37:47,640 --> 00:37:51,160
Speaker 3: upbringing as like, oh that was really rough. I had

797
00:37:51,200 --> 00:37:54,040
Speaker 3: loving parents. They loved the best that they could, but

798
00:37:54,120 --> 00:37:58,839
Speaker 3: they also were very shut down themselves. So that's something

799
00:37:58,840 --> 00:38:03,080
Speaker 3: I'm trying to undo generational trauma, Like whatever they had

800
00:38:03,120 --> 00:38:04,960
Speaker 3: from their parents, they were just doing the best that

801
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:07,839
Speaker 3: they could. And I'm trying to offer my kids all

802
00:38:07,880 --> 00:38:10,040
Speaker 3: the space to feel and we want to feel all

803
00:38:10,080 --> 00:38:12,399
Speaker 3: the things and ask all the questions and dive in.

804
00:38:12,520 --> 00:38:17,320
Speaker 3: And I'm excited about doing this for people that maybe

805
00:38:17,520 --> 00:38:20,320
Speaker 3: are like me in their forties where they're trying to

806
00:38:20,640 --> 00:38:24,480
Speaker 3: figure some stuff out that they didn't have access to

807
00:38:25,200 --> 00:38:25,680
Speaker 3: early on.

808
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:41,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think it is important to note that when

809
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:45,759
Speaker 2: we are in our dysfunction, most of the time, it's

810
00:38:45,800 --> 00:38:48,799
Speaker 2: coming from a good place. I'm doing what I know,

811
00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:51,560
Speaker 2: I'm doing what i'm taught to, doing what I think

812
00:38:51,640 --> 00:38:54,920
Speaker 2: is right, and specifically with feelings, because a lot of

813
00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:59,839
Speaker 2: them are uncomfortable to feel. Steering somebody away from them

814
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:04,560
Speaker 2: probably feels like sometimes the right thing to do. And

815
00:39:04,560 --> 00:39:08,520
Speaker 2: then another thing to note is that because feelings signify

816
00:39:08,560 --> 00:39:11,120
Speaker 2: a need, that's why a lot of us shut them

817
00:39:11,120 --> 00:39:13,600
Speaker 2: down because I don't want to have to need something,

818
00:39:13,920 --> 00:39:15,840
Speaker 2: Because sometimes we're taught that we don't need to be

819
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:18,080
Speaker 2: needy or we don't need to draw attention to ourselves,

820
00:39:18,239 --> 00:39:21,719
Speaker 2: especially women, so we shut those down and we're like, oh,

821
00:39:21,760 --> 00:39:25,359
Speaker 2: that's I'm okay, I'm fine, when really that's gonna come

822
00:39:25,360 --> 00:39:29,720
Speaker 2: out a different way. These feelings are also like energy,

823
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:32,200
Speaker 2: So if I'm going to shut it down, I have

824
00:39:32,280 --> 00:39:35,719
Speaker 2: to put that energy somewhere in my body, and to

825
00:39:35,800 --> 00:39:38,719
Speaker 2: do that, I'm gonna have to displace something else. So

826
00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:41,399
Speaker 2: something's gonna come out, and then that energy is still

827
00:39:41,400 --> 00:39:44,319
Speaker 2: down there, and eventually you're gonna have to get that

828
00:39:44,400 --> 00:39:46,160
Speaker 2: out because you're gonna have something else to put there.

829
00:39:46,160 --> 00:39:48,120
Speaker 3: But it's gonna be way more of an inconvenience, sort

830
00:39:48,120 --> 00:39:50,719
Speaker 3: of like when, yeah, you break down on the side

831
00:39:50,719 --> 00:39:53,120
Speaker 3: of the road, if you addressed it early on.

832
00:39:53,400 --> 00:39:58,000
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, And I say all this too. I am

833
00:39:58,040 --> 00:40:02,040
Speaker 2: a therapist who goes to therapy myself, and I'm not

834
00:40:02,080 --> 00:40:04,640
Speaker 2: perfect at this stuff. So when I talk about this

835
00:40:04,719 --> 00:40:08,160
Speaker 2: stuff or teach it, it's also reminders for me and

836
00:40:08,680 --> 00:40:11,359
Speaker 2: anybody who's listening. I would just want you to give

837
00:40:11,360 --> 00:40:14,319
Speaker 2: yourself a lot of grace because, as you'll hear in

838
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:17,200
Speaker 2: some of the stories we tell, I still get stuck

839
00:40:17,239 --> 00:40:19,520
Speaker 2: in this stuff as well because of just the way

840
00:40:19,520 --> 00:40:20,080
Speaker 2: our world is.

841
00:40:21,239 --> 00:40:23,520
Speaker 3: Yeah. Okay, we'll especially get into that when we talk

842
00:40:23,520 --> 00:40:24,040
Speaker 3: about hurt.

843
00:40:24,160 --> 00:40:24,759
Speaker 2: Yeah, but we're.

844
00:40:24,640 --> 00:40:26,320
Speaker 3: Gonna start with feeling one, which is lonely.

845
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:29,760
Speaker 2: Yes, and I do want to shout out these little

846
00:40:29,760 --> 00:40:32,840
Speaker 2: worksheets that we made. So we made our own feeling

847
00:40:32,880 --> 00:40:36,399
Speaker 2: wheel that specifically talks about these eight emotions. And these

848
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:40,000
Speaker 2: feelings are not the like I said in the beginning,

849
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:43,680
Speaker 2: the right feelings. They're just the ones that I use.

850
00:40:44,400 --> 00:40:46,200
Speaker 2: And you look like here.

851
00:40:46,080 --> 00:40:50,240
Speaker 3: We are exhibit A. But these are something that people

852
00:40:50,400 --> 00:40:53,240
Speaker 3: can have access to for a limited time.

853
00:40:57,120 --> 00:40:59,360
Speaker 2: If you sign up in the next thirty seconds.

854
00:40:59,400 --> 00:41:04,520
Speaker 3: There's a weight list to get these and we'll send

855
00:41:04,520 --> 00:41:07,560
Speaker 3: you a special link and then you can download them.

856
00:41:08,200 --> 00:41:09,560
Speaker 2: Give us your bank account number.

857
00:41:10,160 --> 00:41:12,799
Speaker 3: No, no, really, we should do a little thing. I mean,

858
00:41:12,840 --> 00:41:14,200
Speaker 3: we're not going to, but what if we did a

859
00:41:14,239 --> 00:41:16,920
Speaker 3: thing where it's like, this was five hundred dollars and

860
00:41:16,960 --> 00:41:18,920
Speaker 3: we put a red line through. We're like zero, Now

861
00:41:18,920 --> 00:41:21,680
Speaker 3: it's zero dollars. All you have to do is sign

862
00:41:21,800 --> 00:41:22,600
Speaker 3: up for a newsletter.

863
00:41:22,840 --> 00:41:25,040
Speaker 2: We really should do that. I feel like that'd be funny.

864
00:41:25,080 --> 00:41:27,680
Speaker 3: I feel like an inside joke. If people even made

865
00:41:27,680 --> 00:41:28,600
Speaker 3: it to this point in the.

866
00:41:28,520 --> 00:41:32,359
Speaker 2: Podcast, they're like, what, who would buy that for five

867
00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:34,480
Speaker 2: hundred dollars? Like literally no, right?

868
00:41:35,040 --> 00:41:39,000
Speaker 3: So, but really. If you sign up for our newsletter,

869
00:41:39,680 --> 00:41:45,120
Speaker 3: you will get the Feelings wheel, the Gifts of feelings,

870
00:41:45,160 --> 00:41:49,520
Speaker 3: which is another wheel chart situation, and then sort of

871
00:41:49,520 --> 00:41:51,560
Speaker 3: this flow chart, which I think is great, which really

872
00:41:51,600 --> 00:41:54,160
Speaker 3: breaks down the gifts that you'll get from each feeling,

873
00:41:54,200 --> 00:41:58,000
Speaker 3: and then the impairment want the impairment and the need

874
00:41:58,400 --> 00:42:01,319
Speaker 3: and the need, which is so helpful because prop to

875
00:42:01,320 --> 00:42:03,040
Speaker 3: get in this another time. But I was on a

876
00:42:03,120 --> 00:42:06,960
Speaker 3: phone call with my boyfriend today and I don't know,

877
00:42:07,200 --> 00:42:09,680
Speaker 3: I'm realizing I don't know how to express my needs

878
00:42:09,719 --> 00:42:11,920
Speaker 3: well because part of it feels selfish.

879
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:12,279
Speaker 2: Yeah.

880
00:42:13,760 --> 00:42:16,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, so that's all I'll say about that. So that's

881
00:42:16,400 --> 00:42:19,840
Speaker 3: something I'm working on too. And Kat's expert, she's the therapist.

882
00:42:20,760 --> 00:42:22,160
Speaker 3: But I love that you said I'm a therapist that

883
00:42:22,160 --> 00:42:24,120
Speaker 3: also goes to therapy, because I'd like to say I'm

884
00:42:24,160 --> 00:42:28,080
Speaker 3: a normal, everyday human that's not a therapist that also

885
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:28,800
Speaker 3: goes to therapy.

886
00:42:29,200 --> 00:42:31,200
Speaker 2: So we're the same. Yeah, we're the same.

887
00:42:31,239 --> 00:42:31,680
Speaker 3: We're the same.

888
00:42:31,880 --> 00:42:34,040
Speaker 2: And I will say with the need, that's like a

889
00:42:34,120 --> 00:42:37,680
Speaker 2: jumping off point because sometimes that's not always the exact need.

890
00:42:37,800 --> 00:42:41,480
Speaker 2: So I would take that as like a I would

891
00:42:41,480 --> 00:42:43,000
Speaker 2: take it with a grain of salt. I guess where

892
00:42:43,120 --> 00:42:44,840
Speaker 2: this could be it or it could be a version

893
00:42:44,880 --> 00:42:48,160
Speaker 2: of this, but it does help you start thinking about

894
00:42:48,160 --> 00:42:49,480
Speaker 2: what it is. I don't want people to get too

895
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:51,279
Speaker 2: stuck on that part, because sometimes I might be like,

896
00:42:51,360 --> 00:42:54,960
Speaker 2: that doesn't fit. Okay, So do you want to just

897
00:42:55,000 --> 00:42:55,440
Speaker 2: get into it?

898
00:42:55,520 --> 00:42:57,240
Speaker 3: Yeah, Lovely, we're feeling one.

899
00:42:57,400 --> 00:43:01,560
Speaker 2: So we're starting with lonely. That need is to be known,

900
00:43:01,880 --> 00:43:05,480
Speaker 2: and so that can be a version of a lot

901
00:43:05,480 --> 00:43:07,920
Speaker 2: of different things, like being known can mean different things

902
00:43:07,960 --> 00:43:10,000
Speaker 2: to different people. I might just want my friend to

903
00:43:10,040 --> 00:43:14,320
Speaker 2: see me. I might want maybe in a there was

904
00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:18,400
Speaker 2: an event, or you know what, I'll just get into this.

905
00:43:18,520 --> 00:43:21,239
Speaker 2: I feel like in the situation we had, I was

906
00:43:21,239 --> 00:43:23,879
Speaker 2: feeling a little lonely because I wanted to be more

907
00:43:23,920 --> 00:43:27,279
Speaker 2: a part of the production that we were creating. And

908
00:43:27,320 --> 00:43:29,400
Speaker 2: so I felt like you were over there and I

909
00:43:29,440 --> 00:43:31,880
Speaker 2: was over here, and I just wanted you to know

910
00:43:31,960 --> 00:43:33,120
Speaker 2: more about what I could offer.

911
00:43:33,880 --> 00:43:35,960
Speaker 3: Oh, and that was lonely for you. Yeah, And we'll

912
00:43:35,960 --> 00:43:37,520
Speaker 3: get into more of the in the weeds of that

913
00:43:37,520 --> 00:43:40,759
Speaker 3: when we talk about the feeling of hurt. When I

914
00:43:40,760 --> 00:43:43,359
Speaker 3: think of lonely, I think of a time when we

915
00:43:43,480 --> 00:43:46,320
Speaker 3: first adopted the kids or I was going through certain

916
00:43:46,360 --> 00:43:50,160
Speaker 3: things in my marriage where I didn't have community around

917
00:43:50,200 --> 00:43:53,439
Speaker 3: that because these were situations that I had never encountered before,

918
00:43:53,480 --> 00:43:56,120
Speaker 3: and I kind of felt like I was the only one.

919
00:43:56,200 --> 00:43:58,879
Speaker 3: I didn't know there were groups of people that would

920
00:43:58,920 --> 00:44:04,080
Speaker 3: meet and gather like I've yeah, I'm like, shoot, what

921
00:44:04,120 --> 00:44:06,240
Speaker 3: if I said? What if I not said? Over the years,

922
00:44:07,040 --> 00:44:10,640
Speaker 3: because it's not just my story, So there's things that

923
00:44:10,680 --> 00:44:13,319
Speaker 3: I went through there involving other people, and it's it's

924
00:44:13,360 --> 00:44:16,160
Speaker 3: their story too, So that's why I'm careful with details

925
00:44:16,160 --> 00:44:18,440
Speaker 3: and what I say and what I don't say. But

926
00:44:18,480 --> 00:44:20,040
Speaker 3: what I can say about that is I spent a

927
00:44:20,040 --> 00:44:26,080
Speaker 3: lot of time alone in my closet crying, and that

928
00:44:26,200 --> 00:44:28,839
Speaker 3: was before I found community in what I was going

929
00:44:28,840 --> 00:44:32,279
Speaker 3: through in both situations, so as an adopted mom and

930
00:44:32,360 --> 00:44:36,040
Speaker 3: as a wife, there were things. And once I found

931
00:44:36,640 --> 00:44:39,120
Speaker 3: community on the internet.

932
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:43,600
Speaker 4: Okay, you weren't scammed there first or Facebook, and then

933
00:44:43,640 --> 00:44:45,319
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, this is a group, and then

934
00:44:45,520 --> 00:44:46,920
Speaker 4: you know that was a group where you had to

935
00:44:46,920 --> 00:44:49,200
Speaker 4: get invited in, so I was all nervous, you got

936
00:44:49,200 --> 00:44:51,480
Speaker 4: a special link I got in, but then once I

937
00:44:51,520 --> 00:44:53,480
Speaker 4: got in, and then I did meet them in person,

938
00:44:53,640 --> 00:44:55,560
Speaker 4: so I realized there was a group of moms that

939
00:44:55,600 --> 00:44:57,880
Speaker 4: were gathering right here in Nashville where it was a

940
00:44:57,960 --> 00:45:01,799
Speaker 4: very safe space and you could say anything and there

941
00:45:01,840 --> 00:45:04,879
Speaker 4: was no judgment. And then in my marriage, I found

942
00:45:04,920 --> 00:45:07,720
Speaker 4: another group where I got to go meet and I'm like, oh,

943
00:45:07,840 --> 00:45:11,600
Speaker 4: and that gave me tools to get through that.

944
00:45:11,960 --> 00:45:14,280
Speaker 2: When people saw you you felt like they're.

945
00:45:14,200 --> 00:45:16,680
Speaker 3: Different Vergine and heard like I was like, oh, I'm

946
00:45:16,680 --> 00:45:21,560
Speaker 3: not alone. And then now I'm still involved in those things.

947
00:45:22,360 --> 00:45:25,040
Speaker 3: But now when I was calling some of those women

948
00:45:25,239 --> 00:45:27,680
Speaker 3: feeling lost and alone and like can you help me,

949
00:45:28,360 --> 00:45:31,880
Speaker 3: It's like now periodically I get a text or an

950
00:45:31,920 --> 00:45:33,720
Speaker 3: email or phone call from other people are like, Hey,

951
00:45:34,000 --> 00:45:35,840
Speaker 3: my friend is going through this right now. Can I

952
00:45:35,880 --> 00:45:39,719
Speaker 3: give her your number? Or can this you know? My

953
00:45:39,840 --> 00:45:42,120
Speaker 3: coworker's cousin is going through this, can you? I mean,

954
00:45:42,160 --> 00:45:45,279
Speaker 3: that's how distant, that's how desperate sometimes people are to

955
00:45:45,400 --> 00:45:48,160
Speaker 3: find people that understand what they're going through, because sometimes

956
00:45:48,160 --> 00:45:51,200
Speaker 3: you just don't know anybody, and it takes reaching out

957
00:45:51,239 --> 00:45:54,480
Speaker 3: and asking others, hey do you know anybody, and then

958
00:45:54,520 --> 00:45:57,280
Speaker 3: they might be like, oh, yeah, my neighbors, cousin, sisters,

959
00:45:58,760 --> 00:46:03,200
Speaker 3: father in law's stepdaughter is exactly who you can call,

960
00:46:03,760 --> 00:46:06,040
Speaker 3: let me reach out to her. And so now I'm

961
00:46:06,040 --> 00:46:07,840
Speaker 3: on the receiving end of that, where I was the

962
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:10,960
Speaker 3: one seeking that out and people were there for me.

963
00:46:11,360 --> 00:46:14,239
Speaker 3: I'm able to now be like, oh, hey, here's what

964
00:46:14,280 --> 00:46:16,560
Speaker 3: we did. This is what I can say. Can't say

965
00:46:16,560 --> 00:46:18,440
Speaker 3: for sure that it will work for you, but this

966
00:46:18,520 --> 00:46:21,320
Speaker 3: is a starting point, and then hopefully they feel less alone.

967
00:46:21,840 --> 00:46:24,280
Speaker 3: And so that was the part where I felt very lonely,

968
00:46:24,360 --> 00:46:26,399
Speaker 3: and then once I found the community. But it took

969
00:46:26,520 --> 00:46:27,600
Speaker 3: me being proactive.

970
00:46:27,840 --> 00:46:31,160
Speaker 2: Well, it took you acknowledging and allowing yourself to feel

971
00:46:31,200 --> 00:46:35,120
Speaker 2: the feeling. So if you didn't allow yourself to feel lonely,

972
00:46:35,719 --> 00:46:38,680
Speaker 2: that that impairment would lead you to be apathetic, it

973
00:46:38,680 --> 00:46:41,600
Speaker 2: would lead you to have distance, you wouldn't have as

974
00:46:41,640 --> 00:46:44,800
Speaker 2: close as relationships. I think that would even affect your

975
00:46:45,360 --> 00:46:48,680
Speaker 2: relationships that you already had. I for sure keep pulling

976
00:46:48,719 --> 00:46:50,799
Speaker 2: back because you would keep feeling like different or people

977
00:46:50,800 --> 00:46:53,320
Speaker 2: didn't understand, or you just would want to keep shutting

978
00:46:53,320 --> 00:46:55,560
Speaker 2: yourself down. And the only way to do that is

979
00:46:55,600 --> 00:46:57,440
Speaker 2: to not be face to face with what you don't have,

980
00:46:58,360 --> 00:47:01,640
Speaker 2: and then by feeling the feeling didn't feel very good.

981
00:47:01,680 --> 00:47:04,600
Speaker 2: I'm sure those moments in your closet were excruciating, but

982
00:47:04,680 --> 00:47:09,960
Speaker 2: that led you to intimacy and connection, which I think

983
00:47:09,960 --> 00:47:12,400
Speaker 2: a gift. That's the gift. Yeah, we want.

984
00:47:12,280 --> 00:47:15,000
Speaker 3: The gift intimacy and connection with a little butt on it.

985
00:47:15,080 --> 00:47:15,319
Speaker 2: Yeah.

986
00:47:16,040 --> 00:47:19,479
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, So are we good? Feeling one check?

987
00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:22,080
Speaker 2: Feeling one check? We could do a whole episode probably

988
00:47:22,080 --> 00:47:24,920
Speaker 2: on each of these, but lonely specifically, we really could.

989
00:47:24,960 --> 00:47:29,600
Speaker 3: Especially since especially since I just say that already because

990
00:47:29,600 --> 00:47:33,640
Speaker 3: in my brain I say that out loud twice. Maybe actually, especially.

991
00:47:33,200 --> 00:47:35,160
Speaker 2: Since now you said it.

992
00:47:37,920 --> 00:47:44,920
Speaker 3: Your CD's not skipping well since the pandemic loneliness has

993
00:47:45,000 --> 00:47:46,920
Speaker 3: been an epidemic of SS.

994
00:47:47,200 --> 00:47:48,080
Speaker 2: Yes, and I'm.

995
00:47:47,920 --> 00:47:49,440
Speaker 3: Sure we could spend a lot of time on it,

996
00:47:49,480 --> 00:47:52,160
Speaker 3: but we can move on to feeling too. We'll come back,

997
00:47:52,200 --> 00:47:54,880
Speaker 3: which will be hurt, Yeah, which is where Cat's going

998
00:47:54,920 --> 00:47:55,439
Speaker 3: to share out.

999
00:47:56,280 --> 00:48:00,200
Speaker 2: I hurt her. I felt hurt, but you didn't do

1000
00:48:00,239 --> 00:48:00,640
Speaker 2: it to me.

1001
00:48:00,760 --> 00:48:02,799
Speaker 3: I didn't do it to you, and I didn't mean to. Yeah,

1002
00:48:02,840 --> 00:48:04,440
Speaker 3: I didn't even know I was doing it.

1003
00:48:04,760 --> 00:48:08,120
Speaker 2: So I like to say that nobody can make you

1004
00:48:08,160 --> 00:48:11,440
Speaker 2: feel anything. That's right. So as the tailings one oh

1005
00:48:11,480 --> 00:48:15,320
Speaker 2: one right, and the reason I believe that is because

1006
00:48:15,360 --> 00:48:18,640
Speaker 2: the same thing could have happened to ten other people,

1007
00:48:19,040 --> 00:48:21,080
Speaker 2: and not everybody would have felt the same thing. It's

1008
00:48:21,680 --> 00:48:24,480
Speaker 2: what is happening in the world is hitting my story

1009
00:48:24,520 --> 00:48:26,759
Speaker 2: and my stuff, and then I feel something about it.

1010
00:48:27,280 --> 00:48:32,279
Speaker 2: So not trying to invalidate what I was feeling, I'm

1011
00:48:32,320 --> 00:48:35,000
Speaker 2: just really trying to that's helpful when you confront somebody

1012
00:48:35,080 --> 00:48:37,239
Speaker 2: about it, or I'm not like you did this to me,

1013
00:48:37,640 --> 00:48:43,120
Speaker 2: it's I felt this so hurt. That need is a

1014
00:48:43,160 --> 00:48:46,759
Speaker 2: lot of times just simply attention, attention to whatever it

1015
00:48:46,840 --> 00:48:51,640
Speaker 2: is came up, and I'll share the story, but first

1016
00:48:51,680 --> 00:48:54,239
Speaker 2: I'll share the impairment and the gift. So if you

1017
00:48:54,400 --> 00:48:57,279
Speaker 2: are unaware and you don't let yourself actually acknowledge hurt,

1018
00:48:57,320 --> 00:49:01,280
Speaker 2: which I think we do a lot because when we're

1019
00:49:01,280 --> 00:49:03,600
Speaker 2: our feelings are hurt, I feel like people make that

1020
00:49:03,640 --> 00:49:07,680
Speaker 2: sound like weak or you're being dramatic or get over it.

1021
00:49:08,360 --> 00:49:10,440
Speaker 2: You know, that's the whole like put yourself up by

1022
00:49:10,440 --> 00:49:13,160
Speaker 2: your bootstraps and like keep going, like oh, if it's

1023
00:49:13,160 --> 00:49:16,040
Speaker 2: not broken, keep going kind of thing. And so when

1024
00:49:16,040 --> 00:49:20,200
Speaker 2: we're unaware, that really leads to resentment. And what I

1025
00:49:20,280 --> 00:49:23,840
Speaker 2: do most of the time is I become passive aggressive,

1026
00:49:24,600 --> 00:49:26,719
Speaker 2: or I like stonewall. People all cut people out without

1027
00:49:26,719 --> 00:49:29,879
Speaker 2: even realizing it. So we don't want that.

1028
00:49:30,280 --> 00:49:33,360
Speaker 3: However, few no, we don't, especially since we just launch podcasts.

1029
00:49:33,520 --> 00:49:35,800
Speaker 3: We can't be having that, And then our friendship is

1030
00:49:35,800 --> 00:49:37,080
Speaker 3: more important to me than the podcast.

1031
00:49:37,080 --> 00:49:39,880
Speaker 2: So there's yeah, yeah, And if you are aware, it

1032
00:49:40,000 --> 00:49:43,880
Speaker 2: leads to healing, which obviously feels good, and it helps

1033
00:49:43,880 --> 00:49:47,680
Speaker 2: build courage. So the more I can actually confront somebody

1034
00:49:47,680 --> 00:49:50,719
Speaker 2: about an experience I had, the more courage I have

1035
00:49:50,800 --> 00:49:53,480
Speaker 2: to do that, because it's it is hard, it's vulnerable.

1036
00:49:53,840 --> 00:49:56,200
Speaker 2: You don't know how somebody is going to respond.

1037
00:49:56,280 --> 00:49:59,399
Speaker 3: And I feel like sometimes in a romantic relationship, when

1038
00:49:59,480 --> 00:50:02,279
Speaker 3: we decid to actually let someone in and share a

1039
00:50:02,320 --> 00:50:07,200
Speaker 3: feeling or what we are feeling, I think it's important

1040
00:50:07,200 --> 00:50:09,600
Speaker 3: to say I am feeling this way, not to your partner.

1041
00:50:09,600 --> 00:50:11,040
Speaker 3: A lot of times in relationship could be like, well,

1042
00:50:11,080 --> 00:50:13,000
Speaker 3: you made me feel this way, so I'm glad you

1043
00:50:13,080 --> 00:50:15,520
Speaker 3: clarified that that nobody can make you feel a certain way.

1044
00:50:16,200 --> 00:50:20,000
Speaker 3: But there is this fear of if there's not healthy communication,

1045
00:50:20,680 --> 00:50:23,440
Speaker 3: that it's your feelings won't be valid, that it'll be

1046
00:50:23,560 --> 00:50:28,200
Speaker 3: met with you're being dramatic, yeah, or you're overreacting, which.

1047
00:50:28,120 --> 00:50:33,920
Speaker 2: That can happen, And I get the one. There are

1048
00:50:33,920 --> 00:50:37,279
Speaker 2: people that you confront, there's people that you don't. If

1049
00:50:37,280 --> 00:50:40,160
Speaker 2: you know somebody is going to probably not be receptive

1050
00:50:40,280 --> 00:50:42,440
Speaker 2: and you've already been through this, then there's more of

1051
00:50:42,480 --> 00:50:44,640
Speaker 2: a boundary of Okay, I need to find healing, but

1052
00:50:44,960 --> 00:50:47,040
Speaker 2: that healing might not always come from the person that

1053
00:50:47,160 --> 00:50:48,000
Speaker 2: I felt the hurt way.

1054
00:50:48,040 --> 00:50:49,640
Speaker 3: So do you think that that's the case even if

1055
00:50:49,640 --> 00:50:52,000
Speaker 3: you're in a romantic relationship with someone, Well, if you're in.

1056
00:50:51,960 --> 00:50:55,160
Speaker 2: A romantic relationship with somebody, I would say, let's talk

1057
00:50:55,200 --> 00:50:57,000
Speaker 2: about it. And if they are not able to validate

1058
00:50:57,040 --> 00:51:00,520
Speaker 2: your feelings consistently over and over and over again, then

1059
00:51:00,600 --> 00:51:02,520
Speaker 2: maybe you are not in a healthy relationship and you

1060
00:51:02,520 --> 00:51:04,759
Speaker 2: want to evaluate do I want to still be in this?

1061
00:51:05,360 --> 00:51:07,880
Speaker 2: I think there's some people we can't avoid, like a boss,

1062
00:51:08,120 --> 00:51:13,040
Speaker 2: or like my parents, or just somebody who's in your

1063
00:51:13,080 --> 00:51:15,520
Speaker 2: life that you for one reason oother you can't it's

1064
00:51:15,520 --> 00:51:19,960
Speaker 2: not that easy to end that relationship, So evaluate that

1065
00:51:20,080 --> 00:51:23,280
Speaker 2: because you don't want to then put yourself in a

1066
00:51:23,360 --> 00:51:26,719
Speaker 2: position where that's going to feel even worse or that's

1067
00:51:26,760 --> 00:51:29,120
Speaker 2: going to kind of dig deeper a story you already

1068
00:51:29,120 --> 00:51:29,640
Speaker 2: have in your head.

1069
00:51:30,360 --> 00:51:33,040
Speaker 3: So that's that just the side note of healing doesn't

1070
00:51:33,080 --> 00:51:35,360
Speaker 3: have to come from the person that hurt you. Yeah, okay,

1071
00:51:35,600 --> 00:51:38,880
Speaker 3: And in our case, yeah, we were able to resolve

1072
00:51:38,920 --> 00:51:41,879
Speaker 3: it pretty quickly, which I think was a good thing

1073
00:51:41,920 --> 00:51:45,920
Speaker 3: to experience early on in this endeavor because it was

1074
00:51:46,000 --> 00:51:49,879
Speaker 3: related to episode one, this very episode, except for you're

1075
00:51:49,920 --> 00:51:52,479
Speaker 3: not listening to the original episode that we did because

1076
00:51:52,520 --> 00:51:56,600
Speaker 3: we already recorded an entire episode one and it is trashed.

1077
00:51:56,719 --> 00:52:00,680
Speaker 3: It's actually literally in the cat's trash box on her computer.

1078
00:52:01,600 --> 00:52:04,160
Speaker 3: It's in the trash, which is for the better.

1079
00:52:04,360 --> 00:52:06,160
Speaker 2: Yeah. Do you want to share what happened to it?

1080
00:52:06,360 --> 00:52:11,239
Speaker 3: Well, so I okay, will you share your part?

1081
00:52:11,320 --> 00:52:12,200
Speaker 2: I'll share my part.

1082
00:52:12,320 --> 00:52:15,880
Speaker 3: So I woke up two days after we recorded it.

1083
00:52:15,920 --> 00:52:17,680
Speaker 3: So we recorded it because we were trying to get

1084
00:52:17,680 --> 00:52:19,160
Speaker 3: way ahead because you know, we have video.

1085
00:52:18,960 --> 00:52:19,920
Speaker 2: Now of everything.

1086
00:52:20,320 --> 00:52:25,239
Speaker 3: Shout out go to our Instagram at Feelings Things podcast. Yeah,

1087
00:52:25,280 --> 00:52:27,759
Speaker 3: we're only five years behind on that, but we're going

1088
00:52:27,840 --> 00:52:31,480
Speaker 3: to consistently have video. I've dabbled in that with Four

1089
00:52:31,520 --> 00:52:33,719
Speaker 3: Things a little bit, but this is just part of

1090
00:52:33,320 --> 00:52:39,520
Speaker 3: our our big girl pants now. And we filmed it

1091
00:52:39,800 --> 00:52:42,759
Speaker 3: recorded it, and with social stuff, we were trying to

1092
00:52:42,760 --> 00:52:46,359
Speaker 3: get way ahead of schedule, and so I woke up

1093
00:52:46,360 --> 00:52:48,879
Speaker 3: two days after we recorded it and I just had

1094
00:52:48,880 --> 00:52:50,360
Speaker 3: this feeling. It's almost like I woke up even the

1095
00:52:50,400 --> 00:52:53,160
Speaker 3: middle of the night of like something was off. I

1096
00:52:53,160 --> 00:52:54,840
Speaker 3: didn't like the way we did it. I didn't like

1097
00:52:54,880 --> 00:52:59,000
Speaker 3: the vibe and like the energy. I know that it's

1098
00:52:59,000 --> 00:53:01,600
Speaker 3: okay if we have a knee and we're leaning more therapy.

1099
00:53:01,920 --> 00:53:06,920
Speaker 3: And in the first episode, I was very clear on

1100
00:53:06,960 --> 00:53:09,840
Speaker 3: that this wasn't a therapy podcast. In fact, it was

1101
00:53:09,880 --> 00:53:13,720
Speaker 3: in our original podcast description you know Kat's a therapist

1102
00:53:13,719 --> 00:53:15,799
Speaker 3: and is like, this isn't a therapy podcast. Like I

1103
00:53:15,840 --> 00:53:19,560
Speaker 3: felt the need to say that Kat's a therapist. She

1104
00:53:19,960 --> 00:53:22,640
Speaker 3: had a podcast for years, a successful podcast that a

1105
00:53:22,640 --> 00:53:26,000
Speaker 3: lot of people love, called you Need Therapy. And then

1106
00:53:26,320 --> 00:53:28,759
Speaker 3: she's setting that aside to come join me, which was

1107
00:53:28,760 --> 00:53:32,200
Speaker 3: something you wanted to do too. But we're joining together,

1108
00:53:33,080 --> 00:53:36,320
Speaker 3: and here I am being like, this isn't a therapy podcast,

1109
00:53:36,400 --> 00:53:38,920
Speaker 3: just so that everybody knows, over and over, and I

1110
00:53:38,960 --> 00:53:41,120
Speaker 3: think you were sitting there thinking like, why does she

1111
00:53:41,200 --> 00:53:44,440
Speaker 3: keep saying this so much? Like this is this is

1112
00:53:44,480 --> 00:53:47,400
Speaker 3: like a sort of a slap to my face and like,

1113
00:53:47,760 --> 00:53:49,600
Speaker 3: I'm a therapist and I have a lot to offer

1114
00:53:49,760 --> 00:53:53,040
Speaker 3: and I would like for this to lean therapy. Well

1115
00:53:53,080 --> 00:53:56,719
Speaker 3: I knew we may lean therapy, but some reviews or

1116
00:53:56,760 --> 00:54:01,040
Speaker 3: comments that I've seen about me over the last four

1117
00:54:01,120 --> 00:54:06,480
Speaker 3: years or so dms comments on my Instagram reviews of

1118
00:54:06,520 --> 00:54:10,600
Speaker 3: the podcast, like on iTunes, oh this is leaning way

1119
00:54:10,680 --> 00:54:13,640
Speaker 3: to therapy for me, or Amy's just to therapy. I

1120
00:54:13,640 --> 00:54:17,799
Speaker 3: can't listen to her anymore. Means stuff which I've evolved. Yeah,

1121
00:54:18,160 --> 00:54:20,000
Speaker 3: and so yeah, maybe I am leaning that way because

1122
00:54:20,040 --> 00:54:21,760
Speaker 3: of things that I'm learning and that I find interesting

1123
00:54:21,760 --> 00:54:24,040
Speaker 3: and stuff I have going on in my life. I

1124
00:54:25,360 --> 00:54:28,160
Speaker 3: just want to share. Like I'm not claiming to be

1125
00:54:28,200 --> 00:54:31,840
Speaker 3: the expert or anything. It just can be maybe like

1126
00:54:31,880 --> 00:54:35,399
Speaker 3: come alongside other people that are going through things. And

1127
00:54:36,440 --> 00:54:39,360
Speaker 3: when I read that about me, I thought, well, shoot,

1128
00:54:39,360 --> 00:54:42,359
Speaker 3: I don't want to be put in that box. So

1129
00:54:42,440 --> 00:54:44,359
Speaker 3: bringing you on as a therapist, I think I had

1130
00:54:44,360 --> 00:54:48,440
Speaker 3: this well like it wasn't awareness awareness of it, but

1131
00:54:48,480 --> 00:54:51,040
Speaker 3: maybe just somewhere my subconscious of like, oh, Cat's a therapist.

1132
00:54:51,120 --> 00:54:52,440
Speaker 3: So I need to make sure that people know this

1133
00:54:52,480 --> 00:54:54,200
Speaker 3: isn't going to be a therapy podcast because then they're

1134
00:54:54,200 --> 00:54:56,120
Speaker 3: going to say more bad things about me. So it

1135
00:54:56,160 --> 00:54:58,839
Speaker 3: is my own fear. And so I woke up two

1136
00:54:58,920 --> 00:55:02,160
Speaker 3: days after we recorded, I'm like, why am I worried

1137
00:55:02,160 --> 00:55:07,040
Speaker 3: about what any meaning mine and have said on iTunes

1138
00:55:07,120 --> 00:55:11,960
Speaker 3: reviews about me and how I am as a person now.

1139
00:55:12,000 --> 00:55:13,879
Speaker 3: And if they can't listen, that's fine. If they don't

1140
00:55:13,880 --> 00:55:16,480
Speaker 3: want to listen, that's okay. There are other people that

1141
00:55:16,920 --> 00:55:20,680
Speaker 3: may want this type of content. So we are a

1142
00:55:20,719 --> 00:55:25,480
Speaker 3: therapy podcast, mental health minded. Kat give me that we

1143
00:55:25,520 --> 00:55:30,240
Speaker 3: are mental health minded. So we're mental health minded. Cat's

1144
00:55:30,239 --> 00:55:32,840
Speaker 3: a therapist. I don't even need to reiterate over and

1145
00:55:32,840 --> 00:55:34,840
Speaker 3: over how we're not a therapy podcast, because who cares.

1146
00:55:34,960 --> 00:55:37,680
Speaker 3: We're just going to be what we are and see

1147
00:55:37,680 --> 00:55:40,560
Speaker 3: where it goes. And some episodes may lean more therapy,

1148
00:55:40,719 --> 00:55:43,359
Speaker 3: some episodes may not. And we've got our couch Talks

1149
00:55:43,480 --> 00:55:45,600
Speaker 3: episodes on Thursday where people are going to be writing

1150
00:55:45,640 --> 00:55:48,920
Speaker 3: in and it may be questions they might ask a

1151
00:55:49,000 --> 00:55:52,440
Speaker 3: therapist or a friend, which sometimes your conversations with a

1152
00:55:52,480 --> 00:55:56,799
Speaker 3: friend is like therapy. So I just woke up with

1153
00:55:56,840 --> 00:55:59,120
Speaker 3: this feeling of we need to redo this. I feel

1154
00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:01,760
Speaker 3: bad that I made at that way and it's okay

1155
00:56:01,800 --> 00:56:05,080
Speaker 3: to have a niche, and our niche is this, screw

1156
00:56:05,120 --> 00:56:18,920
Speaker 3: anybody else who doesn't like it. So then I called

1157
00:56:18,960 --> 00:56:21,520
Speaker 3: you and I'm like, hey, this is what I'm thinking

1158
00:56:21,520 --> 00:56:25,800
Speaker 3: about this, and you were literally on your way to therapy,

1159
00:56:26,000 --> 00:56:28,200
Speaker 3: I know, to just like rip me a new one

1160
00:56:28,239 --> 00:56:30,719
Speaker 3: with your therapist. And you're in the car and you're like,

1161
00:56:30,719 --> 00:56:32,560
Speaker 3: oh my gosh, I can't believe you called and you're

1162
00:56:32,560 --> 00:56:34,520
Speaker 3: saying all this right now, because you were like, I've

1163
00:56:34,520 --> 00:56:37,279
Speaker 3: been trying to process how I'm going to talk through

1164
00:56:37,280 --> 00:56:39,719
Speaker 3: this with my therapist so I can figure out what

1165
00:56:39,800 --> 00:56:44,399
Speaker 3: I need from this. Because you left that recording like

1166
00:56:44,560 --> 00:56:47,440
Speaker 3: what am I even doing here? But I didn't know

1167
00:56:47,480 --> 00:56:50,040
Speaker 3: you felt that way, and so I by saying over

1168
00:56:50,080 --> 00:56:52,600
Speaker 3: and over this isn't a therapy podcast. That was hurting you,

1169
00:56:53,600 --> 00:56:54,880
Speaker 3: and so I'm sorry for that.

1170
00:56:55,120 --> 00:56:57,879
Speaker 2: Thank you. That's my perspective. Yeah, and well, I think

1171
00:56:57,880 --> 00:57:00,120
Speaker 2: most of what you said is what happens. So we

1172
00:57:00,160 --> 00:57:04,040
Speaker 2: recorded this episode. I kept hearing the it's not a

1173
00:57:04,040 --> 00:57:07,080
Speaker 2: therapy podcast over and over and over again, and I

1174
00:57:07,120 --> 00:57:09,560
Speaker 2: think I you didn't realize how much you were saying it,

1175
00:57:09,920 --> 00:57:13,160
Speaker 2: and I clocked it every single time. So I was really.

1176
00:57:13,560 --> 00:57:17,320
Speaker 2: I actually was really fearful and anxious that day recording

1177
00:57:17,880 --> 00:57:21,320
Speaker 2: because I didn't know how to be, because I was

1178
00:57:21,360 --> 00:57:24,280
Speaker 2: worried if I, like I feel today, I can talk

1179
00:57:24,320 --> 00:57:25,960
Speaker 2: as much as I want or as little as I want.

1180
00:57:25,960 --> 00:57:27,800
Speaker 2: I can share whatever I want, I can add things.

1181
00:57:28,120 --> 00:57:31,280
Speaker 2: But I was trying to like stay inside these imaginary

1182
00:57:32,400 --> 00:57:36,040
Speaker 2: bounds that had been created because we weren't a therapy podcast.

1183
00:57:36,280 --> 00:57:39,400
Speaker 2: But I also was trying to and I talked to

1184
00:57:39,440 --> 00:57:41,840
Speaker 2: this about with my therapists before too. I have to

1185
00:57:41,880 --> 00:57:46,160
Speaker 2: maintain some professional boundaries for myself as well, because I

1186
00:57:46,280 --> 00:57:49,640
Speaker 2: want people who either, if you are my client, I

1187
00:57:49,680 --> 00:57:51,160
Speaker 2: want you to be able to listen to this just

1188
00:57:51,200 --> 00:57:53,280
Speaker 2: like you could listen to you need therapy. And I

1189
00:57:53,920 --> 00:57:55,680
Speaker 2: want to be congruent with how I show up as

1190
00:57:55,720 --> 00:57:57,520
Speaker 2: a therapist and how I show up here because this

1191
00:57:57,600 --> 00:57:59,880
Speaker 2: is public, and so I didn't. I was like, I

1192
00:58:00,080 --> 00:58:02,360
Speaker 2: feel like a dud, Like I can't be fun and

1193
00:58:02,400 --> 00:58:05,160
Speaker 2: I can't be smart, or I can't be like I

1194
00:58:05,200 --> 00:58:05,960
Speaker 2: didn't know how to be.

1195
00:58:06,880 --> 00:58:09,560
Speaker 3: So for that one comment, isn't that interesting me saying

1196
00:58:09,680 --> 00:58:12,040
Speaker 3: that over and over dimmed your light?

1197
00:58:12,320 --> 00:58:12,760
Speaker 2: Yeah?

1198
00:58:13,000 --> 00:58:14,800
Speaker 3: And that's the last thing I would want to do,

1199
00:58:14,960 --> 00:58:17,919
Speaker 3: is dim your light, but it was my own insecurity

1200
00:58:18,000 --> 00:58:19,280
Speaker 3: of worrying about whomever.

1201
00:58:20,040 --> 00:58:22,320
Speaker 2: Well, I also heard a lot of stuff that you said,

1202
00:58:22,760 --> 00:58:25,120
Speaker 2: and I filtered a lot of stuff, Like when I

1203
00:58:25,200 --> 00:58:29,880
Speaker 2: was like going back and recounting the conversation, I think

1204
00:58:29,920 --> 00:58:33,840
Speaker 2: I exaggerated things that happened because I was hearing them through.

1205
00:58:34,360 --> 00:58:37,480
Speaker 2: This is not a therapy podcast. So whenever you would

1206
00:58:37,480 --> 00:58:40,240
Speaker 2: like stop me, I was like, oh my god, it

1207
00:58:40,560 --> 00:58:43,440
Speaker 2: did something wrong right, like I just I felt. So

1208
00:58:43,720 --> 00:58:45,840
Speaker 2: I got a lot of emotions, so it wasn't just

1209
00:58:45,880 --> 00:58:48,040
Speaker 2: as you can see, you're feeling multiple emotions at once,

1210
00:58:48,160 --> 00:58:51,080
Speaker 2: not just one. So I was going to go to

1211
00:58:51,120 --> 00:58:53,440
Speaker 2: my therapist. Well, and the next day was your birthday,

1212
00:58:53,600 --> 00:58:54,919
Speaker 2: so I said, well, I'm not going to talk about

1213
00:58:54,960 --> 00:58:57,360
Speaker 2: it with her. And I also had this feeling that

1214
00:58:57,400 --> 00:58:59,080
Speaker 2: I didn't like that. I was like, does she think

1215
00:58:59,120 --> 00:59:02,640
Speaker 2: I'm stupid? Like does she not know? I felt like

1216
00:59:02,680 --> 00:59:05,920
Speaker 2: does she not respect me? And that all started coming

1217
00:59:06,000 --> 00:59:07,480
Speaker 2: up and I was like why is this bothering me

1218
00:59:07,520 --> 00:59:09,720
Speaker 2: so much? So I knew I needed to process it.

1219
00:59:10,000 --> 00:59:11,880
Speaker 2: I knew that I didn't want to talk about it

1220
00:59:11,920 --> 00:59:14,640
Speaker 2: on your birthday. But after your birthday party, I came

1221
00:59:14,680 --> 00:59:17,560
Speaker 2: home and I said to Patrick, I said, Amy's such

1222
00:59:17,560 --> 00:59:20,400
Speaker 2: a good friend, and it's because I was seeing you

1223
00:59:20,400 --> 00:59:21,960
Speaker 2: in a different light too. It was like this was

1224
00:59:22,000 --> 00:59:24,800
Speaker 2: not about work, and I was like, she does like

1225
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:26,760
Speaker 2: me and think this about me and think this about me?

1226
00:59:27,080 --> 00:59:30,600
Speaker 2: So what was going on in me that I saw

1227
00:59:30,640 --> 00:59:34,280
Speaker 2: everything she was saying and doing through this filter and

1228
00:59:34,320 --> 00:59:36,680
Speaker 2: through this lens. So I knew part of it was

1229
00:59:36,680 --> 00:59:41,160
Speaker 2: my own stuff. But still the timing was so weird

1230
00:59:41,480 --> 00:59:44,120
Speaker 2: because I even walked into my therapist's office and I said, Okay,

1231
00:59:44,200 --> 00:59:46,480
Speaker 2: I don't really know what my angle is now today

1232
00:59:46,680 --> 00:59:48,680
Speaker 2: because I was going to talk about this, but now

1233
00:59:48,720 --> 00:59:51,959
Speaker 2: I need to talk about this, and honestly thinking about

1234
00:59:51,960 --> 00:59:54,760
Speaker 2: this today too when I was driving to work. That

1235
00:59:54,840 --> 00:59:58,120
Speaker 2: experience was very helpful. I think for our relationship there

1236
00:59:58,160 --> 01:00:01,280
Speaker 2: was healing, But also does this make me emotional? I

1237
01:00:01,320 --> 01:00:04,160
Speaker 2: think that it allowed me to open up a place

1238
01:00:04,200 --> 01:00:07,920
Speaker 2: that I need healing in my own life too. And again,

1239
01:00:08,240 --> 01:00:10,960
Speaker 2: somebody hurt, they're being hurt doesn't mean you did anything wrong.

1240
01:00:11,000 --> 01:00:13,920
Speaker 2: It almost is like you showed me a spot that

1241
01:00:13,960 --> 01:00:16,520
Speaker 2: I need to go back and address because I realized

1242
01:00:17,120 --> 01:00:21,480
Speaker 2: that a lot of my life I have survived on

1243
01:00:21,760 --> 01:00:24,960
Speaker 2: being smart and that's what I offered, Like that's what

1244
01:00:25,040 --> 01:00:28,440
Speaker 2: I was versus I was other things, but that was

1245
01:00:28,480 --> 01:00:29,840
Speaker 2: like what I was like, Well, if I have this,

1246
01:00:29,920 --> 01:00:33,080
Speaker 2: I'm okay and I want I went back and I

1247
01:00:33,400 --> 01:00:35,120
Speaker 2: started talking about all the things that I wish I

1248
01:00:35,160 --> 01:00:36,680
Speaker 2: would have done as a kid. I was like, and

1249
01:00:36,720 --> 01:00:38,000
Speaker 2: I want to do these things, and I want to

1250
01:00:38,040 --> 01:00:39,840
Speaker 2: do these things, and one of them was like an

1251
01:00:39,880 --> 01:00:42,600
Speaker 2: improv class, And I was like, Amy's been trying to

1252
01:00:42,600 --> 01:00:44,600
Speaker 2: get me to do an improv class, Like she's trying

1253
01:00:44,640 --> 01:00:46,120
Speaker 2: to heal this part of me and I don't even

1254
01:00:46,120 --> 01:00:48,480
Speaker 2: know it. So it was very cool for me to

1255
01:00:48,560 --> 01:00:51,440
Speaker 2: be able to take that experience, really sit with it,

1256
01:00:51,960 --> 01:00:53,840
Speaker 2: use it as a tool. What is it that I need?

1257
01:00:54,360 --> 01:00:56,720
Speaker 2: There are things that I need that I had no idea.

1258
01:00:56,760 --> 01:00:59,520
Speaker 2: I was still feeling pain from that had nothing to

1259
01:00:59,560 --> 01:01:00,000
Speaker 2: do with you.

1260
01:01:00,720 --> 01:01:04,120
Speaker 3: Yeah, when I think that, that's the beauty of the experience.

1261
01:01:04,200 --> 01:01:06,680
Speaker 3: That's the gift of allowing yourself to feel the emotion

1262
01:01:07,480 --> 01:01:10,919
Speaker 3: and also us feeling safe enough to come to each

1263
01:01:10,920 --> 01:01:13,959
Speaker 3: other and both want to hear what the other person

1264
01:01:14,040 --> 01:01:15,920
Speaker 3: has to say. Like I called you and woke up

1265
01:01:15,960 --> 01:01:18,440
Speaker 3: with this epiphany and I shared it, and then you

1266
01:01:18,480 --> 01:01:21,320
Speaker 3: were able to finally say, especially because you didn't want

1267
01:01:21,320 --> 01:01:23,000
Speaker 3: to bring it up on my birthday, like Okay, well

1268
01:01:23,000 --> 01:01:24,240
Speaker 3: you're not gonna believe this, but I'm about to go

1269
01:01:24,280 --> 01:01:27,520
Speaker 3: into my therapist, and you were able to share with

1270
01:01:27,600 --> 01:01:29,800
Speaker 3: me exactly and I held space for that.

1271
01:01:30,960 --> 01:01:32,680
Speaker 2: You were really good at listening, which.

1272
01:01:32,520 --> 01:01:36,320
Speaker 3: If I wasn't in a healthy place, who knows, Like

1273
01:01:36,680 --> 01:01:38,720
Speaker 3: if I could have held space for that, if I

1274
01:01:38,840 --> 01:01:41,200
Speaker 3: had a different filter that then I was taking what

1275
01:01:41,240 --> 01:01:43,240
Speaker 3: you were saying through. And that's what I think can

1276
01:01:43,320 --> 01:01:46,640
Speaker 3: happen when there's big disconnects and relationships. It's like everyone

1277
01:01:46,680 --> 01:01:49,280
Speaker 3: has their filter and it's like nobody's feeling seen or heard,

1278
01:01:49,320 --> 01:01:51,520
Speaker 3: and it's like oh, And so I was very thankful

1279
01:01:51,560 --> 01:01:54,920
Speaker 3: that we were able to come to a resolution and

1280
01:01:55,440 --> 01:01:59,200
Speaker 3: heal that in such a timely manner. And I think

1281
01:01:59,600 --> 01:02:02,120
Speaker 3: that was a gift for us, especially starting this out

1282
01:02:02,120 --> 01:02:03,240
Speaker 3: because it's episode one.

1283
01:02:03,600 --> 01:02:06,880
Speaker 2: And it's a gift for everybody else too. That episode

1284
01:02:07,000 --> 01:02:07,919
Speaker 2: was not good.

1285
01:02:07,960 --> 01:02:11,520
Speaker 3: It wasn't like like it was pretty terrible, like people

1286
01:02:11,560 --> 01:02:16,120
Speaker 3: probably unsubscribe. So I think we were both just not

1287
01:02:16,280 --> 01:02:18,360
Speaker 3: ourselves because I was too busy trying to fit a

1288
01:02:18,400 --> 01:02:20,920
Speaker 3: mold that I think listeners would want of me and

1289
01:02:20,960 --> 01:02:25,640
Speaker 3: then trying to force you into that when you're like, hello, yeah.

1290
01:02:25,000 --> 01:02:28,080
Speaker 2: I'm kat I am like that's part of who I am.

1291
01:02:28,120 --> 01:02:28,880
Speaker 3: Went to grad school.

1292
01:02:30,920 --> 01:02:33,840
Speaker 2: Don't tell me, Buddy's not a therapy podcast.

1293
01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:37,280
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, and we're over that. Yeah, Okay, this is

1294
01:02:37,280 --> 01:02:40,000
Speaker 3: so the whatever you need it to be podcast.

1295
01:02:40,200 --> 01:02:42,840
Speaker 2: So well, yeah, but we do have a niche, but

1296
01:02:42,880 --> 01:02:47,120
Speaker 2: we have a niche feelings in therapy, but there's a

1297
01:02:47,360 --> 01:02:49,120
Speaker 2: there's so many gifts in that. I think that is.

1298
01:02:50,080 --> 01:02:53,000
Speaker 2: I'm glad that happened because of the things that I'm

1299
01:02:53,040 --> 01:02:54,920
Speaker 2: getting in my own life, the things that we're able

1300
01:02:55,000 --> 01:02:57,520
Speaker 2: to gain from each other, like we're learning about each other.

1301
01:02:57,520 --> 01:02:59,440
Speaker 3: And that, Well, something else you said to me that

1302
01:02:59,520 --> 01:03:02,320
Speaker 3: stood out of like you're like, I'm also trying to

1303
01:03:02,360 --> 01:03:04,919
Speaker 3: figure out like I always have the need to be right,

1304
01:03:05,160 --> 01:03:07,600
Speaker 3: and you're you were able to say this is even

1305
01:03:07,600 --> 01:03:11,120
Speaker 3: an issue in my own marriage of like the I

1306
01:03:11,160 --> 01:03:13,560
Speaker 3: always have to be right. So I just wanted to

1307
01:03:14,360 --> 01:03:18,240
Speaker 3: so I was, yeah, I think your awareness and be like, okay, yes,

1308
01:03:18,360 --> 01:03:22,200
Speaker 3: when you have awareness, it's it's so beautiful. It can

1309
01:03:22,280 --> 01:03:25,240
Speaker 3: suck because you're like I hate that I am this

1310
01:03:25,320 --> 01:03:28,240
Speaker 3: way and people have to put up with me being

1311
01:03:28,280 --> 01:03:33,000
Speaker 3: this way, but you can work on it, Yeah, when

1312
01:03:33,200 --> 01:03:37,000
Speaker 3: you can work on it. Yeah, I wasn't saying you.

1313
01:03:36,000 --> 01:03:37,920
Speaker 2: You can work on this part of you because you're

1314
01:03:37,960 --> 01:03:41,080
Speaker 2: not always right Cat, I'm really not. And I am

1315
01:03:41,080 --> 01:03:43,560
Speaker 2: glad you said that because I forgot that was one

1316
01:03:43,600 --> 01:03:44,880
Speaker 2: of the things I was going to go in and

1317
01:03:45,040 --> 01:03:48,040
Speaker 2: talk about of I need to be better at knowing

1318
01:03:48,840 --> 01:03:52,800
Speaker 2: when I really am in the right and when I

1319
01:03:52,840 --> 01:03:56,040
Speaker 2: am being stubborn and when I'm just used to people

1320
01:03:56,080 --> 01:03:59,440
Speaker 2: listening to me. Because I work by my I work

1321
01:03:59,520 --> 01:04:01,680
Speaker 2: for myself, so I haven't had a boss since I

1322
01:04:01,760 --> 01:04:04,920
Speaker 2: was twenty six. So I'm in this new partnership and

1323
01:04:04,960 --> 01:04:07,280
Speaker 2: I'm like, dang it is it? Am I not good

1324
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:10,280
Speaker 2: at working with people? And I'm married to somebody who's

1325
01:04:10,360 --> 01:04:13,800
Speaker 2: very agreeable, So I want there to be space for

1326
01:04:13,840 --> 01:04:16,880
Speaker 2: his voice. And so this was another opportunity for me

1327
01:04:16,920 --> 01:04:19,400
Speaker 2: to say, for me to feel like, what does it

1328
01:04:19,400 --> 01:04:21,320
Speaker 2: feel like when I really do feel like this is

1329
01:04:21,360 --> 01:04:23,520
Speaker 2: something that has happened, And what does it feel like

1330
01:04:23,560 --> 01:04:28,160
Speaker 2: when I'm just being my egos taking over ego? Yeah,

1331
01:04:28,200 --> 01:04:30,120
Speaker 2: we all have it, even though we don't want it.

1332
01:04:30,240 --> 01:04:33,640
Speaker 2: We need it to survive. But yeah. I like to

1333
01:04:33,680 --> 01:04:37,320
Speaker 2: say self awareness really is knowing that there's so much

1334
01:04:37,320 --> 01:04:39,760
Speaker 2: stuff that you don't know. Yes, So the more self

1335
01:04:39,760 --> 01:04:42,040
Speaker 2: awareness I have, the more I know that, like I

1336
01:04:42,080 --> 01:04:44,720
Speaker 2: need a lot of help, which we'll get to because

1337
01:04:44,720 --> 01:04:45,800
Speaker 2: that's part of another feeling.

1338
01:04:46,920 --> 01:04:48,320
Speaker 3: And you can find all the help you need here

1339
01:04:48,320 --> 01:04:49,680
Speaker 3: because we're a therapy podcast.

1340
01:04:50,360 --> 01:04:52,240
Speaker 2: Just kidding me, You've got from one side of the

1341
01:04:52,280 --> 01:04:53,400
Speaker 2: spectrum to the other.

1342
01:04:54,080 --> 01:04:56,760
Speaker 3: Now I'm being yeah, I'm joking, being silly. We just

1343
01:04:56,840 --> 01:05:00,760
Speaker 3: are who we are, and you are a therapist. I'm

1344
01:05:01,160 --> 01:05:03,720
Speaker 3: trying to figure out here with what do you think

1345
01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:06,040
Speaker 3: on time? Because I feel like we've should we keep

1346
01:05:06,080 --> 01:05:09,000
Speaker 3: going through the other two or should we we stop

1347
01:05:09,080 --> 01:05:12,240
Speaker 3: with her and then pick back up, pick back up

1348
01:05:12,480 --> 01:05:13,320
Speaker 3: next week.

1349
01:05:13,200 --> 01:05:15,440
Speaker 2: With yeah yeah fear.

1350
01:05:15,720 --> 01:05:18,440
Speaker 3: Yeah, we'll do to at a time, maybe two or

1351
01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:21,160
Speaker 3: three maybe yeah, yeah, let's do that because we've got stories.

1352
01:05:21,320 --> 01:05:23,480
Speaker 3: Because with Fear, I feel like I have a whole

1353
01:05:23,480 --> 01:05:26,480
Speaker 3: story about my boyfriend. Okay, you can get into.

1354
01:05:26,360 --> 01:05:29,640
Speaker 2: That cliffhanger and China next time for the story about

1355
01:05:29,640 --> 01:05:30,160
Speaker 2: her boyfriend's.

1356
01:05:30,200 --> 01:05:30,960
Speaker 3: We call it tease.

1357
01:05:31,560 --> 01:05:32,400
Speaker 2: That's what we call tea.

1358
01:05:32,440 --> 01:05:33,520
Speaker 3: Subscribe follow.

1359
01:05:34,080 --> 01:05:36,880
Speaker 2: If you subscribe, we'll send you the special episode about

1360
01:05:36,920 --> 01:05:40,920
Speaker 2: Amy's fear for free and it's worth one thousand dollars.

1361
01:05:41,040 --> 01:05:43,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, we view all the details, which really doesn't matter,

1362
01:05:43,520 --> 01:05:46,840
Speaker 3: but I want to share it because it does matter.

1363
01:05:47,640 --> 01:05:49,800
Speaker 3: Why do we say things that sometimes we don't mean?

1364
01:05:50,400 --> 01:05:53,600
Speaker 3: It does matter. I think it's important when you recognize

1365
01:05:53,600 --> 01:05:57,400
Speaker 3: a fear, because that's one if you set aside, you

1366
01:05:57,480 --> 01:06:00,720
Speaker 3: will miss out on life. You will miss out on something.

1367
01:06:00,960 --> 01:06:04,800
Speaker 3: It could be unexpectedly fabulous.

1368
01:06:04,840 --> 01:06:07,280
Speaker 2: And fear doesn't. Well, we're getting into it. Fear does

1369
01:06:07,360 --> 01:06:10,040
Speaker 2: not mean stop all the time. Sometimes it doesn't. Times

1370
01:06:10,040 --> 01:06:13,720
Speaker 2: it doesn't. So let's get let's pause, pause, because I'm

1371
01:06:13,760 --> 01:06:14,760
Speaker 2: gonna get ahead of myself.

1372
01:06:14,840 --> 01:06:18,320
Speaker 3: Okay, So fear coming up next Tuesday. It'll be tuned

1373
01:06:18,440 --> 01:06:22,280
Speaker 3: be one of our core feelings and then uh feeling

1374
01:06:22,320 --> 01:06:24,320
Speaker 3: for which we get into that next week with fear

1375
01:06:24,320 --> 01:06:25,000
Speaker 3: is a little weird to me.

1376
01:06:25,040 --> 01:06:25,640
Speaker 2: It's glad.

1377
01:06:26,240 --> 01:06:28,640
Speaker 3: I never really I know it's a core feeling glad,

1378
01:06:29,400 --> 01:06:31,280
Speaker 3: but I don't know that I spend too much time

1379
01:06:31,800 --> 01:06:34,760
Speaker 3: with the word glad. So I'm glad we are.

1380
01:06:35,040 --> 01:06:37,160
Speaker 2: It is like dressful, old person word. I feel like

1381
01:06:37,240 --> 01:06:39,400
Speaker 2: it's like gladness feels like it's from the nineteen twenties

1382
01:06:39,520 --> 01:06:41,080
Speaker 2: or something, you know, like who says.

1383
01:06:40,840 --> 01:06:43,120
Speaker 3: I'm glad, Well, I say it when I Oh, I'm

1384
01:06:43,120 --> 01:06:45,360
Speaker 3: glad about that, but I don't ever be like I

1385
01:06:45,480 --> 01:06:46,280
Speaker 3: feel glad.

1386
01:06:46,720 --> 01:06:48,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, we'll get into.

1387
01:06:48,480 --> 01:06:50,400
Speaker 3: It and I can't wait to feel more glad.

1388
01:06:50,480 --> 01:06:55,320
Speaker 2: I will say with the feelings wheel, when you guys

1389
01:06:55,360 --> 01:06:58,240
Speaker 2: see it, which I don't know, did we say that

1390
01:06:58,240 --> 01:07:00,520
Speaker 2: we're sending it to them. If we did, say we

1391
01:07:00,520 --> 01:07:02,760
Speaker 2: weren't kidding about that. We really will send it to you.

1392
01:07:02,760 --> 01:07:04,360
Speaker 3: You have to do a sign up with these letter.

1393
01:07:04,520 --> 01:07:07,320
Speaker 2: There's no tricks, yeah, and we'll send you all those things.

1394
01:07:07,560 --> 01:07:11,360
Speaker 2: But you'll see that there's eight core and then outside

1395
01:07:11,360 --> 01:07:13,960
Speaker 2: of the core feelings, they're what I like to call

1396
01:07:14,040 --> 01:07:17,479
Speaker 2: shades of the feelings. So with glad, there's so many

1397
01:07:17,600 --> 01:07:20,360
Speaker 2: that's the wrong one, that's gifts. Oh, these are gifts,

1398
01:07:20,440 --> 01:07:22,920
Speaker 2: so that one. Yeah, yeah, feelings. So if you look

1399
01:07:22,960 --> 01:07:25,560
Speaker 2: at glad, there's different shades of gladness. So you could

1400
01:07:25,800 --> 01:07:27,480
Speaker 2: use different what are other words on there?

1401
01:07:28,480 --> 01:07:34,240
Speaker 3: Uh for glad? Yeah, excited, encouraged, happy, content, satisfaction, optimistic.

1402
01:07:35,240 --> 01:07:36,920
Speaker 3: It's a different shade of yellow though, and then an

1403
01:07:36,920 --> 01:07:38,400
Speaker 3: even lighter shade of it would.

1404
01:07:38,160 --> 01:07:42,040
Speaker 2: Be I didn't organize them in the shades though. Oh okay, yeah, so,

1405
01:07:42,320 --> 01:07:45,240
Speaker 2: and that's not all encompassing. Those are just other words

1406
01:07:45,280 --> 01:07:46,960
Speaker 2: you could use because sometimes it's hard to come up

1407
01:07:46,960 --> 01:07:48,840
Speaker 2: with the word, and it's helpful to look at that.

1408
01:07:49,440 --> 01:07:53,479
Speaker 2: But even with like anger and fear and all of those,

1409
01:07:54,000 --> 01:07:57,560
Speaker 2: sometimes anger and fear and those words feel too heavy.

1410
01:07:57,600 --> 01:07:59,720
Speaker 2: But that's why we have all these different shades of

1411
01:07:59,760 --> 01:08:02,880
Speaker 2: the It's still the same core root, right, but it

1412
01:08:02,960 --> 01:08:04,959
Speaker 2: might be a more palatable or more fitting word.

1413
01:08:05,080 --> 01:08:08,200
Speaker 3: Okay, So I think since we spent some time on hurt,

1414
01:08:08,280 --> 01:08:10,640
Speaker 3: we can wrap up with that one because I think

1415
01:08:10,720 --> 01:08:13,640
Speaker 3: it's a good way to look at it, Like although, dang,

1416
01:08:13,640 --> 01:08:16,640
Speaker 3: you just flat out we're feeling hurt. Yeah, like you've

1417
01:08:16,680 --> 01:08:20,600
Speaker 3: watched straight to that core, but the lighter shade of

1418
01:08:20,640 --> 01:08:23,759
Speaker 3: green is offended. I was sorry.

1419
01:08:24,560 --> 01:08:26,400
Speaker 2: Sometimes it's counting, Yeah.

1420
01:08:26,200 --> 01:08:29,840
Speaker 3: All your hard work disappointed because you're like, wait, I

1421
01:08:29,960 --> 01:08:32,439
Speaker 3: just left this and I came and I'm doing this

1422
01:08:32,520 --> 01:08:34,240
Speaker 3: with you, and now I don't even know my role,

1423
01:08:34,280 --> 01:08:37,439
Speaker 3: which also could feel rejected, is under there. So then

1424
01:08:37,479 --> 01:08:42,519
Speaker 3: you're feeling rejected because I'm shutting up shocked because you're

1425
01:08:42,560 --> 01:08:49,920
Speaker 3: like what what? That's another one so under hurt. It's despair, shock, betrayed, rejected, offended, disappointed,

1426
01:08:49,960 --> 01:08:52,200
Speaker 3: pain and then you were having your own pain.

1427
01:08:52,360 --> 01:08:55,439
Speaker 2: So yeah, so that those words might just be more

1428
01:08:55,439 --> 01:08:57,080
Speaker 2: helpful if the other ones don't.

1429
01:08:57,280 --> 01:08:59,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love the feelings. We all you did a

1430
01:08:59,280 --> 01:09:03,639
Speaker 3: great job. You so good so feeling things with Amy

1431
01:09:03,680 --> 01:09:05,599
Speaker 3: and Kat we have our own wheel, we have our

1432
01:09:05,640 --> 01:09:10,040
Speaker 3: gifts of feelings and then the feelings the feeling flow chart,

1433
01:09:10,240 --> 01:09:12,800
Speaker 3: which I love like this. I'm going to use my

1434
01:09:12,840 --> 01:09:16,000
Speaker 3: everyday life things in my relationship things with my kids

1435
01:09:16,320 --> 01:09:22,080
Speaker 3: where there's four columns impairment, feeling, need, and gift, and

1436
01:09:22,120 --> 01:09:23,719
Speaker 3: I'm going to be referencing this all the time.

1437
01:09:23,760 --> 01:09:26,120
Speaker 2: And I do have to shout this out because copyright.

1438
01:09:27,280 --> 01:09:30,080
Speaker 2: The majority of this comes from this Feelings flow chart

1439
01:09:30,320 --> 01:09:33,200
Speaker 2: comes from Chip Dods, the Voice of the Heart, and

1440
01:09:33,280 --> 01:09:36,960
Speaker 2: he also uses those same eight core feelings so it

1441
01:09:37,040 --> 01:09:39,360
Speaker 2: aligns really well. So I don't want anybody think that

1442
01:09:39,439 --> 01:09:43,439
Speaker 2: I created that, that I have adapted from other people's work.

1443
01:09:43,920 --> 01:09:47,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, you noted it on the PDF. I don't want

1444
01:09:47,720 --> 01:09:50,479
Speaker 3: to get suit and it is downloaded when you sign

1445
01:09:50,520 --> 01:09:53,320
Speaker 3: up for newsletter and then you get these files. It

1446
01:09:53,439 --> 01:09:57,439
Speaker 3: said this chart was adapted from Chip Dods The Voice

1447
01:09:57,439 --> 01:10:01,160
Speaker 3: of the Heart, and then shout out Lindsay Gibson for

1448
01:10:01,240 --> 01:10:05,040
Speaker 3: her she has a adult children of emotionally immature parents.

1449
01:10:05,680 --> 01:10:06,200
Speaker 3: That is me.

1450
01:10:06,920 --> 01:10:10,240
Speaker 2: I have the book in my back, that's me. That

1451
01:10:10,320 --> 01:10:13,639
Speaker 2: book's really good to just help understand why we don't

1452
01:10:13,640 --> 01:10:16,400
Speaker 2: feel the these feelings as easily as we want.

1453
01:10:16,560 --> 01:10:18,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is good stuff. What I'm saying is you're

1454
01:10:18,920 --> 01:10:22,000
Speaker 3: gonna want to sign up for a newsletter because if anything,

1455
01:10:22,560 --> 01:10:24,120
Speaker 3: you're just gonna get this, and this is gonna be

1456
01:10:24,160 --> 01:10:26,360
Speaker 3: something you can reference or you know, you can hit up.

1457
01:10:26,640 --> 01:10:29,519
Speaker 3: You know. I'm sure Chip has it somewhere somewhere. But

1458
01:10:30,240 --> 01:10:31,240
Speaker 3: is this color coordinated?

1459
01:10:31,320 --> 01:10:32,520
Speaker 2: That's pretty.

1460
01:10:32,560 --> 01:10:36,000
Speaker 3: The colors are pretty because Cat color coordinated it. So yeah,

1461
01:10:36,640 --> 01:10:40,320
Speaker 3: I guess that's that's it. That's a wrap on episode one.

1462
01:10:40,439 --> 01:10:43,280
Speaker 3: I mean, we encourage y'all to, yeah, follow us on socials.

1463
01:10:43,840 --> 01:10:48,800
Speaker 3: Feeling Things podcast is the handle Feeling Things podcasts. There's

1464
01:10:48,840 --> 01:10:52,200
Speaker 3: other Feeling Things accounts where the podcast one and when

1465
01:10:52,240 --> 01:10:54,599
Speaker 3: you'll see my face in Cat's face, so it should

1466
01:10:54,640 --> 01:10:58,800
Speaker 3: be pretty clear. And then we want to hear from

1467
01:10:58,840 --> 01:11:01,040
Speaker 3: you for couch talks or anything else. Do you want

1468
01:11:01,080 --> 01:11:03,479
Speaker 3: to share couch Talks will be our Q and a

1469
01:11:03,560 --> 01:11:05,920
Speaker 3: episode which will be every Thursday. So coming up in

1470
01:11:05,960 --> 01:11:08,679
Speaker 3: a couple of days, we'll have our very first couch

1471
01:11:08,800 --> 01:11:13,800
Speaker 3: talks and the email for that is Hey there at

1472
01:11:13,960 --> 01:11:18,320
Speaker 3: Feelingthings podcast dot com. Kat originally thought it was Hello.

1473
01:11:18,160 --> 01:11:21,120
Speaker 2: But yeah, sorry, let's see. I also got locked out

1474
01:11:21,160 --> 01:11:24,200
Speaker 2: of our email for like three weeks. I was silently panicking.

1475
01:11:24,280 --> 01:11:24,800
Speaker 2: But we're in.

1476
01:11:25,080 --> 01:11:27,720
Speaker 3: We're in, we are in. We're reading your emails. So Hey,

1477
01:11:27,800 --> 01:11:30,840
Speaker 3: there at Feeling Things at podcast dot com. Thank you

1478
01:11:30,960 --> 01:11:33,360
Speaker 3: for being here, and.

1479
01:11:33,720 --> 01:11:37,400
Speaker 2: We hope you have the day you need to have.

1480
01:11:37,720 --> 01:11:38,799
Speaker 2: Boom bye