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Speaker 1: Two hopeless one dating app then dares right. The question

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Speaker 1: is whose love life is more tragic? It's Battle Love

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Speaker 1: the Tinder Dates.

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Speaker 2: It's the dating game show that encourages you to ask

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Speaker 2: yourself WWSD, what would Snookie do? That's the type of

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Speaker 2: decision making we need for Battle of the Tinder Dates,

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Speaker 2: where two of our listeners go head to head to

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Speaker 2: find out whose dating life is the most tragic. We're

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Speaker 2: gonna explain the rules in just a second, but first

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Speaker 2: let's meet today's contestants. In this corner, her ideal first

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Speaker 2: date is to get tipsy with a foreign dignitary and

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Speaker 2: accidentally leak confidential secrets of national security to them over

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Speaker 2: a late night burrito Wow to meet treason.

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Speaker 3: Eden Ah, that's how World War one started, Thank.

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Speaker 1: You for that.

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Speaker 2: And in the other corner, she challenges you to name

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Speaker 2: any car that she hasked on top of or thrown

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Speaker 2: up inside of, and trust me, you're not gonna be

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Speaker 2: able to do it. That's why they call her party Carly.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Carly, maybe you could give Alexis a recommendation on

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Speaker 3: what cleaner to use.

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Speaker 2: Yes, But here's how the game works. One contestant is

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Speaker 2: going to start by telling one of their worst dating

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Speaker 2: stories than the other were trying to counter with a

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Speaker 2: nightmare story of their own. We're gonna go back and

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Speaker 2: forth for three rounds here, and then afterwards we will

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Speaker 2: declare a winner. We're gonna kick things off first with

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Speaker 2: treeson Eden.

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Speaker 3: Go. Okay. So I had a date with a guy

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Speaker 3: who was like a finance brotype. Oh okay. He was

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Speaker 3: going off about crypto and how I should as right,

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Speaker 3: I forget the name, maybe lama coin, or I'll pack

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Speaker 3: a coin or done.

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Speaker 2: That sounds legit, so like you could just.

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Speaker 3: Put any animal in front of coin and then it

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Speaker 3: probably actually exists. So I was like sure, and he

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Speaker 3: showed me how to set up an account and I

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Speaker 3: bought some. Oh no, well, five days later it's shot

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Speaker 3: up in value and instead of only two hundred dollars,

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Speaker 3: where I like, oh, two thousands.

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Speaker 2: A bad date, It's amazing.

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Speaker 3: The thing is I texted him to thank him, and

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Speaker 3: he said he just bought an island, so good luck

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Speaker 3: with life and he'll never see me again.

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Speaker 1: Oh wow, man, I still don't feel sorry for you though.

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Speaker 2: That's why it's called lama coin island.

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Speaker 3: I got it. You been there? Maybe you got an invite?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, and him and bros. Let's go over to Carly.

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Speaker 3: Can you hit back?

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Speaker 1: Yeah? So a guy and I actually went to this

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Speaker 1: eat food place and I ordered crab and when my

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Speaker 1: crab came out, he started complaining about he hated the

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Speaker 1: small secret.

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Speaker 3: Why would you go there?

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Speaker 1: Then did he pick the rest? Right? Yeah? It was crazy.

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Speaker 1: So he he actually taste out an entire bottle of

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Speaker 1: cologne out of his pocket and spraised it all over

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Speaker 1: himself until the whole bottle is gone. Headache. I sat there,

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Speaker 1: I sat there in the smell of Abercromp all night.

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Speaker 2: I have a Crombie. He has the good steps. It's

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Speaker 2: round two, Eden, We're back to you, all right.

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Speaker 3: Well I met a guy who works in a museum

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Speaker 3: and he told me he was going to seek the

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Speaker 3: Inn one night for our date. Oh yeah, that sounds romantic,

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Speaker 3: so it sounds fun. But when I get there, he

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Speaker 3: kept joking about the dinosaur exhibit and if I wanted

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Speaker 3: to look at his bone. Oh it's a good one.

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Speaker 2: I should work on this show. You guys, he's not

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Speaker 2: talking about the dinasty.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, we got it, we got it. I just thought

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Speaker 3: he was going to be classy because he actually worked

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Speaker 3: at a museum. Like. At one point he said he

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Speaker 3: had used the restroom, so lady, and then he came

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Speaker 3: out dressed as a caveman and yelled, my name is Jave.

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Speaker 3: He want hump.

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Speaker 1: That's a line.

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Speaker 2: Why do I know this guy? Interesting? We're just going

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Speaker 2: to move on to car?

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Speaker 3: All right, friends, what do you got?

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Speaker 1: A guy and I were out at the bars and

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Speaker 1: as night ended, he said he'd ordered me an uber home.

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Speaker 3: That's nice.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it was really nice. So the car got there

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Speaker 1: and I got in, but he got in right after me. Oh,

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Speaker 1: and that's when he introduced me to his mom and dad,

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Speaker 1: who were in the front seat.

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Speaker 3: No, called his mom and dad to come pick you up.

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Speaker 3: It was uber chair.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. They explained that their son had been laid off recently,

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Speaker 1: so they had been driving him around to use the

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Speaker 1: financial stream. He's going through it, guess worse, it gets worse.

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Speaker 1: They looked at him and said, Matthew, is she going

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Speaker 1: to her house or spending the night with us?

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Speaker 2: Like they even have to ask? You're going back to

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Speaker 2: their point. It's time for the third and final round,

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Speaker 2: and we need your best story.

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Speaker 3: Okay, little guy, I got some food from a food

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Speaker 3: shack by apart, and then moving on a walk, and

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Speaker 3: a raccoon kept coming up to us. It wasn't paying

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Speaker 3: any attention to me, but it started making weird noise

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Speaker 3: and almost attacking my date. WHOA, oh god, oh man,

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Speaker 3: that's scary because he's moving in on the raccoon's girl. Man.

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Speaker 1: Yeah.

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Speaker 3: That's when he apologized, and he finally admitted that he

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Speaker 3: had stuffed raw chicken breast down his pants to look biggers. WHOA,

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Speaker 3: oh my god, sanitary, did you get sell Manila down there?

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Speaker 2: This is your last chance?

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Speaker 1: My god. So my date came to my house and

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Speaker 1: he brought me this huge bouquet of flowers.

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Speaker 3: Okay, nice, finally a nice guy that you're out with.

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Speaker 1: Yeah. And so it wasn't until after the date when

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Speaker 1: my eighty year old neighbor came by and said, come

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Speaker 1: with me and I yeah, and I follow her to

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Speaker 1: the retirement center across the street. A bunch of the

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Speaker 1: seniors and a couple of nurses were holding down my

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Speaker 1: date on a gurney. What what. Turns out they had

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Speaker 1: a video of him coming into the facility and taking

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Speaker 1: all of the flowers from the front desk areas you

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Speaker 1: knows where to go. I was more ashamed he couldn't

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Speaker 1: fight off the senior.

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Speaker 2: It's kind of sad. There's the final bell that means

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Speaker 2: match is over. We need to score this one, Alexis,

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Speaker 2: who wins today?

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Speaker 1: I'm gonna do Carly for the senior. Steeler guy just

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Speaker 1: said one for Carly. Sorry.

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Speaker 3: I can't get over Rod Chicken in the pants.

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Speaker 2: I give it. You got the decision maker.

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Speaker 3: Who's it going to be?

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Speaker 1: I'm going with Rod.

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Speaker 2: Chicken pants surprise, eating congratulations trees and eating like Alexis

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Speaker 2: is jealous of what a train wreck your dating life

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Speaker 2: is and you should be proud of that.

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Speaker 3: Real Well, I mean, I guess I'm happy I won,

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Speaker 3: but I hope my dating life gets better.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, no, I hope not. I want you back on

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Speaker 2: the show for more of these stories. That's a battle

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Speaker 2: of the tender dates. We got your phones have coming

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Speaker 1: Up Brooke and Jeffrey in the morning.