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Speaker 1: My ex wanted to take my service dog for his ADHD,

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Speaker 1: so I dumped them by the able.

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Speaker 2: There's a line.

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Speaker 3: Okay, why do we have to take something like ADHD

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Speaker 3: and try.

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Speaker 1: To get service dog? What do you mean a service

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Speaker 1: dog is a great cure for ADHD? Right, can't fogus?

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Speaker 1: Can't fogus puppy and simp Focus on the puppy, Focus

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Speaker 1: on the puppy.

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Speaker 3: This man wants the dog to do his homework. The

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Speaker 3: dogs just gonna eat his homework.

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Speaker 1: I don't know if the problems that you want solved

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Speaker 1: are going to be solved, but you'll have fun while

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Speaker 1: not solving that.

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Speaker 2: Now, that is true. That is true.

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Speaker 1: Service Dogs for ADHD brought to you by Mayor Samuel Donner. Yeah, okay.

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Speaker 1: Also this is from YouTube subscriber star Wars one. Awaight, hey,

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Speaker 1: shout out star Wars. I've seen a few comments from you. Okay,

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Speaker 1: So let me tell you about my ex F cuz

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Speaker 1: fuck them. Yeah, I'll be honest. F was a rebound

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Speaker 1: after I had my heart broken.

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Speaker 2: Yikes.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, F was already getting cooked right now. That was

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Speaker 1: mistake number one. F was eighteen at the time and

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Speaker 1: I had recently turned twenty, so I wasn't thinking of

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Speaker 1: an age cat very much. I was still living with

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Speaker 1: my parents and F decided to run away away from home,

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Speaker 1: so my parents allowed them to stay in the spare

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Speaker 1: room for the time being.

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Speaker 2: Thing, that's a crazy situation. Already running away from home.

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Speaker 1: I got myself a job working the night shift at

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Speaker 1: a gas station, and I helped them find a job

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Speaker 1: at a different gas station on the day shift.

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Speaker 2: Here's where the red flag started.

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Speaker 1: F would schedule for us to be at social events

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Speaker 1: without taking into consideration that I had an odd sleep

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Speaker 1: schedule because of the night shift, which led to multiple

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Speaker 1: instances of me having to drive long distances while exhausted,

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Speaker 1: which is never good for safety. If you've seen my

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Speaker 1: other comments, you'll know that I'm disabled and have pots

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Speaker 1: in fibromyalgia. Fibromyalgia I believe, Okay, muscle skeletal pain.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, at heart heart issues and muscle skeletal pain.

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Speaker 1: So the symptoms had recently started becoming worse, and I

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Speaker 1: was fainting more frequently and having trouble walking and standing.

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Speaker 1: And this dude was just planting a whole social calendar.

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Speaker 1: Can we go to a head banging concert?

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Speaker 2: I fucking love death.

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Speaker 1: There was one day where they insisted they needed my

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Speaker 1: cane and took it without asking, and then kept leaving

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Speaker 1: it at random places where I couldn't get to it.

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Speaker 1: When I mentioned looking to getting a service dog for myself,

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Speaker 1: they asked me if my dog could help.

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Speaker 2: With their ADHD.

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Speaker 1: If you know anything about service dogs, you know that's absurd.

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Speaker 1: But if you don't, service dogs are trained for the

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Speaker 1: specific needs of one disabled person, and there really isn't

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Speaker 1: any task a dog could perform that would help with ADHD.

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Speaker 1: During one of these social outings thirty miles from my

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Speaker 1: house that didn't really want to attend, but I was

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Speaker 1: the only one that could drive, I ended up having

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Speaker 1: a fainting episode. I guess in the car. For me,

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Speaker 1: all that needs to be done is wake me up,

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Speaker 1: give me some water, give me a few minutes to recover,

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Speaker 1: and I'll be completely fine again. F freaked out and

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Speaker 1: got an ambulance called, and I ended up with my

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Speaker 1: scara stains on my legs because F could do nothing

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Speaker 1: but cry in my lap instead of just shaking me

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Speaker 1: and finding me a drink. All this came to a

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Speaker 1: head when F got neon purple hair dye all over

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Speaker 1: the bathroom. It was like a unicorn exploded and left

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Speaker 1: it there for hours, standing in the countertops, walls, doorflow, door, floor, rug,

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Speaker 1: and bathtub. And instead of apologizing, F screamed at my

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Speaker 1: mother and slammed the door. They're letting F stay in

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Speaker 1: the house, in their house, slam the door in her

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Speaker 1: face before walking into the house after dark and pajama

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Speaker 1: shore facetiming with God only knows who. That was the end,

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Speaker 1: and my parents had me tell them to find another

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Speaker 1: living arrangement. They were sort of in charge of my

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Speaker 1: friend group, so I ended up losing a good number

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Speaker 1: of friends, but they all turned out.

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Speaker 2: To be assholes anyway.

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Speaker 1: I'm so glad that F is out of my life,

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Speaker 1: and I feel sorry for the constant string of x's

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Speaker 1: they've had since we broke up three years ago.

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Speaker 2: Toxicity can never be.

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Speaker 3: Lonely man, star Rows, Oh, you and your family did

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Speaker 3: so much for f FM. Honestly, not that way, but

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Speaker 3: you know, like let life f them and everyone else.

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Speaker 2: That's what I'm talking about. I guess I want to

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Speaker 2: hear your worst relationship stories in the commons.

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Speaker 3: And shout out to you Starros for dropping your comment.

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Speaker 3: You know, we've been reading a lot more stories from

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Speaker 3: our audience here on YouTube, so yeah, definitely share your stories.

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Speaker 2: We might just read them. Set them all right, we'll

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Speaker 2: see some.

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Speaker 1: She cheated on me, so I had a threesome with

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Speaker 1: her ex boyfriend and the male mistress.

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Speaker 2: But now I think I'm in love with both of them.

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Speaker 1: What the fuck is going on here? To clear up

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Speaker 1: any confusion, I am a bisexual man, and I'd love

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Speaker 1: to share the story because I'm very proud of it.

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Speaker 1: A few years ago, my ex girlfriend cheated on me

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Speaker 1: with another guy. She then had the oddacity to tell

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Speaker 1: me that if I was a grown up that I

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Speaker 1: could deal with it, and.

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Speaker 2: She hopes we could still be friends.

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Speaker 1: But she's lost any feelings for me and is fully

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Speaker 1: in love with this new guy.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: And she hadn't said that, I probably wouldn't have made

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Speaker 1: this plan, But now I had to teach her a

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Speaker 1: valuable lesson. I was in a depressed state for a

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Speaker 1: long time and couldn't bring myself to delete her number,

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Speaker 1: and she thought I was her friend now, so she

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Speaker 1: started to send me pictures of her and her new

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Speaker 1: boyfriends with laughing emojis.

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Speaker 2: No laughing. And then one fateful day, John, while I

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Speaker 2: went through Tinder.

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Speaker 1: I found someone who looked quite familiar her new boyfriend.

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Speaker 1: Of course, I wouldn't tell her that her new boyfriend

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Speaker 1: is on Tinder. In fact, I just went and matched

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Speaker 1: with him. Ooh, which was quite surprising because I thought

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Speaker 1: he was straight.

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Speaker 2: Oh. He didn't stop me from starting a conversation. Bisexual

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Speaker 2: Poppy was good a steamy conversation. He didn't know who

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Speaker 2: I was. She never told him she was in a

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Speaker 2: relationship while she was flirting with him. But this was perfect.

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Speaker 1: We had longer conversations and he told me more and

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Speaker 1: more about himself. Over the weeks, we learned about each other,

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Speaker 1: and now I had.

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Speaker 2: A master plan.

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Speaker 1: This is so des I suggested that we could meet

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Speaker 1: up with each other at a bar.

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Speaker 2: He agreed.

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Speaker 1: Keep in mind he was still in a relationship with

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Speaker 1: my ex.

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Speaker 2: Girlfriend at the time. What is with these people, man? Yo?

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Speaker 1: The statistic fifty percent of men cheating a relationship in

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Speaker 1: twenty five percent of women cheating a relationship.

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Speaker 3: Now that the bisexual component is there, oh wow, there's

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Speaker 3: just more options to cheat one WHOA Well, we went

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Speaker 3: to the bar and we had a great time, and

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Speaker 3: one date became two dates, became three dates became many

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Speaker 3: more dates.

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Speaker 2: Dang.

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Speaker 1: It took a few months, but then I got him

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Speaker 1: to the point where he developed.

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Speaker 2: Feelings for me.

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Speaker 1: Oh my god, I was his sexy, smutty affair. Oh God,

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Speaker 1: but he didn't, now, John, I got in contact with

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Speaker 1: my girlfriend's former ex boyfriend as well. Why did he

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Speaker 1: break up with her, you asked John, Well, he broke

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Speaker 1: up with her because he came out as gang. I

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Speaker 1: was in contact with book guys, the ex boyfriend and

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Speaker 1: the current boyfriend. In our conversations with my new boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: we talked about our sexual desires and he told me

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Speaker 1: that he always wanted to have a threesome. So I

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Speaker 1: suggested one with who other than the gay ex boyfriend.

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Speaker 3: Bro The chances, The chances insane, The odds are off

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Speaker 3: the charts, ladies and gentlemen.

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Speaker 1: I knew he was his type because we kind of

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Speaker 1: look alike and he had feelings for me. So I

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Speaker 1: asked the gay ex boyfriend if you wanted to become

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Speaker 1: the third and to my surprise, he said, yes.

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Speaker 3: Wow, you gotta give it up for the pure, like

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Speaker 3: the execution need.

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Speaker 2: The execution is flalls here.

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Speaker 3: Credit like you need to run some fortune five hundred

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Speaker 3: company because.

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Speaker 2: But wait, John, it gets crazier. Oh god, I'm honestly

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Speaker 2: still surprised how all of this worked out without her noticing.

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Speaker 2: But it did.

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Speaker 1: And then the day of the threesome occurred, and that's

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Speaker 1: when I decided to go nuclear. He hasn't got nuclear yet,

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Speaker 1: He's going nuclear right now?

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Speaker 2: Do it in front of her.

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Speaker 1: The two guys came to my apartment. I led them

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Speaker 1: to the bedroom and they started talking to each other,

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Speaker 1: making small talk with their big cocks. While they talked,

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Speaker 1: I took a selfie from a safe distance, close enough

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Speaker 1: that she could see their faces, but far enough away

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Speaker 1: that they wouldn't notice. Oh, I see, and the action started.

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Speaker 1: Of course, I won't go into any details here, but

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Speaker 1: god damn did I enjoy myself.

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Speaker 2: More than anything in the world.

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Speaker 1: A few days later, after I told him that now

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Speaker 1: that I granted him the of a threesome, I wanted

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Speaker 1: something to return. I told him that I don't want

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Speaker 1: to be an affair any longer. I told him, hey,

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Speaker 1: I have feelings for you, and that you should break

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Speaker 1: up with her or I will break up with him.

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Speaker 2: Oh An ultimatum. Baby. Wow.

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Speaker 3: For a second, I thought, wait, so does she know?

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Speaker 2: She doesn't know yet? Wow? Wow.

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Speaker 1: I knew it was hardcore manipulative, but I had a

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Speaker 1: plan and I had full control over him.

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Speaker 2: He was my puppet and I could do whatever I want.

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Speaker 2: Geez girl. So I guess what he did, John, tell

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Speaker 2: me Sam.

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Speaker 1: He broke up with her. And it gets worse. He

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Speaker 1: threw her out. Oh she was living with him, they

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Speaker 1: were living together.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god.

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Speaker 1: I even got him to move out of his apartment

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Speaker 1: and move in with me, meaning she lost both her

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Speaker 1: home and her boyfriend.

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Speaker 2: Wow.

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Speaker 1: Because after she texted me as a friend oh and

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Speaker 1: said with crying emojis that her boyfriend dumbed her and

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Speaker 1: that she regrets leaving me and that she just wants

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Speaker 1: me back. I then said, wait your boyfriend are you

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Speaker 1: talking about this guy? And I sent her the selfie.

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Speaker 1: I took oro that selfie not only with that boyfriend,

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Speaker 1: but her ex boyfriend as well. Oh my She called

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Speaker 1: and texted me several times, but I ignored her, and

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Speaker 1: my plan was almost successful. There were only three things

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Speaker 1: left that I had to do. He wasn't done with

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Speaker 1: three things left. My god, this man is like an

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Speaker 1: assassin or something. The first yeah was I told her

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Speaker 1: mother with receipts, who hates infidelity more than anything, because

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Speaker 1: her father cheated on her mother with another woman.

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Speaker 2: Oh my god, I could say, like father, like daughter.

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Speaker 1: Her mother was angry but thanked me for telling her,

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Speaker 1: and from what I've heard, her mother cut ties with her.

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Speaker 1: But I admit that I don't know if it actually happened,

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Speaker 1: and I don't think that it happened.

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Speaker 2: It would be funny if it was true.

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Speaker 1: The second thing I did was dumping him because, unfortunately

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Speaker 1: for him, although he was hot as hell, he was

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Speaker 1: a dirty cheater too, and I hate infidelity as well.

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Speaker 1: The last thing I did was I went out with

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Speaker 1: the gay ex boyfriend and after a few dates, we

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Speaker 1: got together and I'm happy to say we're officially a couple.

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Speaker 1: In the end, I destroyed both her and the guy

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Speaker 1: he cheated on me with. But I couldn't be more

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Speaker 1: proud of myself.

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Speaker 2: Man, Uh wow, I am speechless.

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Speaker 3: This this man is the most devious, deviant DJ that

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Speaker 3: has ever ever breathed.

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Speaker 2: You thought that's true? It was crazy.

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Speaker 1: Check out this one where Opie gets his fiance arrested

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Speaker 1: for cheating on him,