Speaker 1: Hello everyone, and welcome to Cheeky's and Chill. Happy Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday.
Speaker 1: Whatever day that you are watching or listening to Cheeky's
Speaker 1: and Chill, I hope you're having an amazing day and
Speaker 1: that you're not feeling overwhelmed, because that's what we're going
Speaker 1: to be talking about today, you guys, feeling overwhelmed and
Speaker 1: what you do when you feel overwhelmed or how do
Speaker 1: you even recognize when you're feeling overwhelmed? And I'm going
Speaker 1: to talk all about that today because I've been experiencing
Speaker 1: that a lot, so I want to talk about it.
Speaker 1: You know, Cheeky's and Chill is a space where I
Speaker 1: share everything with you guys, anything that's on my mind,
Speaker 1: So I am going to do that. And with that
Speaker 1: being said, I first want to thank you guys all
Speaker 1: for coming onto my podcast, for listening. Whether you come
Speaker 1: just to see what I'm talking about, to tease me out,
Speaker 1: or to learn something, I hope you do learn something
Speaker 1: from me, So I just want to say thank you
Speaker 1: first and foremost. All Right, well, let's get this started, okay,
Speaker 1: So let me take a deep breath because today I'm
Speaker 1: feeling a little overwhelmed, and I think it's I've been
Speaker 1: feeling like that almost every day for the past month, maybe,
Speaker 1: And personally, I am overwhelmed because I have a lot
Speaker 1: going on in my career. I have the launch of,
Speaker 1: you know, my new tour, the A Month Is Tour
Speaker 1: that same day the album comes out. Preparing for that,
Speaker 1: there are so many things that go into a tour,
Speaker 1: especially a tour of this magnitude, which is I think
Speaker 1: the biggest tour as of yet in my career. So
Speaker 1: there are a lot of like little ends that things
Speaker 1: that you're just like, oh my god, I forgot about that,
Speaker 1: and then I forgot about that, and then it's just like,
Speaker 1: oh my god. And sometimes I just want to do
Speaker 1: everything myself because I feel like I just I'm going
Speaker 1: to get it done, and I know how I like things,
Speaker 1: and I don't want to run the risk of someone
Speaker 1: not doing it correctly. But then that's not fair to
Speaker 1: the other person. So I'm just like, and then it's
Speaker 1: not fair to me. So I've just been feeling that,
Speaker 1: not only that, in the midst of all of this
Speaker 1: going on, promoting the album, filming the podcast, doing everything
Speaker 1: that I do. I'm planning a wedding, and then other
Speaker 1: surprises that have come into my life that are great,
Speaker 1: and it's okay. It is what it is. I am
Speaker 1: happy and I'm grateful. But the truth is that I've
Speaker 1: learned to say when people ask me, how are you,
Speaker 1: I'm honest. Now before i'd be like, I'm good, I
Speaker 1: just like put on that little like mask of I'm good.
Speaker 1: I'm good, I'm good and as positive as you want
Speaker 1: to be and as positive as I like to be.
Speaker 1: The truth is it sometimes we're not okay, we're not good,
Speaker 1: and it's okay to say, you know what, I'm having
Speaker 1: an overwhelming day, I'm not feeling too good, and it's
Speaker 1: better to be honest. And I think that it's made
Speaker 1: me even feel better to say it out loud. And
Speaker 1: every day is a new day, and I try my best.
Speaker 1: And I woke up this morning and I meditated and
Speaker 1: I prayed and I said, everything's going to be okay,
Speaker 1: it's going to be a great day. And it was.
Speaker 1: But then shit happens. Then life happens, and it's happening,
Speaker 1: and I do my best to just take time throughout
Speaker 1: the day and just breathe and say, you know what,
Speaker 1: everything I'm doing I'm grateful for and I love doing it.
Speaker 1: I love coming here and doing my podcasts, and I
Speaker 1: love going to rehearsals, and I love having meetings and planning,
Speaker 1: and I love planning my wedding and I am I
Speaker 1: am happy to do everything. But the truth is that
Speaker 1: I have to be honest with myself, and sometimes I
Speaker 1: feel like I am spreading myself too thin, and I
Speaker 1: guess it goes back to me wanting to please people.
Speaker 1: And that's been an issue and I've talked about it
Speaker 1: here on the podcast a lot. That's been something that
Speaker 1: I've been dealing with my whole life, and I've gotten
Speaker 1: so much better at it, being able to say no
Speaker 1: and learning the power of saying no. But sometimes I
Speaker 1: catch myself doing things not to disappoint people, to show
Speaker 1: myself I can do it, and yes, maybe I can
Speaker 1: do it, But should I do it? Is it good
Speaker 1: for me to do it? And That's where I'm at
Speaker 1: right now, And I have to give myself grace. And
Speaker 1: the reason I'm speaking about this is because I'm sure
Speaker 1: a lot of you have felt this way or feel
Speaker 1: it and sometimes you don't even know if you are
Speaker 1: feeling overwhelmed, And for me, an indication is when I'm irritable.
Speaker 1: When I'm easily irritable, that is a sign to me
Speaker 1: that I'm like, Okay, I'm overwhelmed. I'm overworking myself and
Speaker 1: I have to step back. And I've been taking days
Speaker 1: where I'm just like, I won't look at my phone
Speaker 1: for hours because then I'll be stuck on my phone
Speaker 1: and I'll add more to my plate, you know. So
Speaker 1: I'm learning to just take some time to myself on
Speaker 1: Sundays and just do nothing. But it's been a thing,
Speaker 1: you guys, it's been It's moments where I just want
Speaker 1: to cry. And I thought, you know what. I think
Speaker 1: it's because I named my album Ye month is, and
Speaker 1: I named you know, the tour, and you know, and
Speaker 1: I've been saying this in every interview. I've been saying this.
Speaker 1: I say it all throughout the album, all throughout the tour.
Speaker 1: You know, how diamonds are created, and they're created under
Speaker 1: a lot of pressure, and it takes years for a
Speaker 1: diamond to be created, and we talked about this on
Speaker 1: an episode. So I think I'm definitely feeling it. Everyone's
Speaker 1: feeling it. Everyone's feeling the pressure. But I know because
Speaker 1: I know, because I have so much faith, because I
Speaker 1: know how good this album is, and I know everything
Speaker 1: that we're planning for this tour that it's going to
Speaker 1: be great. So anyways, by this time, once you guys
Speaker 1: listen or hear this podcast, the tour already started, so
Speaker 1: all date you guys on that. But anyways, I'm going
Speaker 1: to look at my notes because that's how overwhelmed I am.
Speaker 1: Usually I don't even really look at my notes, but
Speaker 1: I'm going to look at them because this is an
Speaker 1: important topic that I think that we need to speak
Speaker 1: about our mental health, our emotional health and be okay
Speaker 1: with speaking about it and not always trying to pretend
Speaker 1: like everything is okay. And I think that's part of healing,
Speaker 1: of getting better is recognizing like, hey, I'm feeling this way,
Speaker 1: I'm feeling stressed out, I'm feeling whatever. Now I'm okay
Speaker 1: with say, you know what, I'm not having a good
Speaker 1: day to day. I'm a little irritable, so just don't
Speaker 1: mind me. I am a little snappy right now, and
Speaker 1: not try that's putting more pressure on yourself of just
Speaker 1: like pretending and wanting to pretend like everything is okay,
Speaker 1: because that's a lot like that takes up a lot
Speaker 1: of energy to just have to just in a way
Speaker 1: fake it, you know, like they say fake it till
Speaker 1: you make it. I'm just like, let it all hang
Speaker 1: out like this, this is what it is. And I
Speaker 1: learned that that came with experience and time, and it
Speaker 1: didn't come very easily, you know, because I always want
Speaker 1: to be that positive person and as positive as I
Speaker 1: feel like I am. My brother Mikey always tells me,
Speaker 1: He's like, oh my god, you're just so annoying you
Speaker 1: and your positivety. But I just I'd rather live my
Speaker 1: life being positive and saying even though I say, hey,
Speaker 1: I'm having a bad day, in the back of my mind,
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, this is just the day. It's just
Speaker 1: a moment. I'm gonna be fine. That's just who I am.
Speaker 1: That's how I'm built. But the point is I'm better
Speaker 1: with speaking it, with voicing it. With voicing Hey, guys,
Speaker 1: I'm I'm not doing too good right now, and sometimes
Speaker 1: I want to run away. I've had those moments you
Speaker 1: guys a lot these past few weeks where I'm just like,
Speaker 1: I just want to disappear, and not like disappear to heaven,
Speaker 1: but like disappear and go to like a mountain where
Speaker 1: there's no like Wi Fi or signal and just stay
Speaker 1: in a cabin and eat fruits and vegetables and just
Speaker 1: disappear where no one can find me, just me and
Speaker 1: me and just say, well, fuck it. I have no idea.
Speaker 1: She's just gone. Not Richard, not my manager, not anybody
Speaker 1: can get a hold of me. I've had those moments
Speaker 1: where I'm like, I think, I just I want to
Speaker 1: just go away for a little bit, you know, because
Speaker 1: on top of all that, you guys, I have I
Speaker 1: feel like I'm complaining right now, but you know what,
Speaker 1: I'm just expressing to you guys, because I'm human at
Speaker 1: the end of the day, you know. So anyways, on
Speaker 1: top of all of that, I have my business partners,
Speaker 1: and then I have to promote my stuff and I
Speaker 1: want to sell my stuff, and I love my brands.
Speaker 1: But I've even said, you know what, I'm going to
Speaker 1: chill on that right now. My focus is my tour
Speaker 1: and my album and I have to be okay with that.
Speaker 1: And even with that, I have learned to put my
Speaker 1: priority straight. So that is the whole thing here right now,
Speaker 1: setting our priorities straight, okay, Like making a list of
Speaker 1: priorities and being okay with saying if I don't get this,
Speaker 1: if I don't get to this secondary list today, it's okay,
Speaker 1: I'll get to it tomorrow. Before I'd set something like,
Speaker 1: i'd love I love checking things off my list. It
Speaker 1: feels just so delicious. I'm just like, oh my god,
Speaker 1: I feel feeling. I love the feeling of feeling accomplished.
Speaker 1: So I would thrive off of that, but I'd put
Speaker 1: so much pressure on myself, like, oh my god, it's
Speaker 1: seven pm and I still have two more things to
Speaker 1: do on my list, and it's just like I'd put
Speaker 1: all this pressure on myself and it just caused me
Speaker 1: so much stress and I'd be unhappy. So now what
Speaker 1: I do is like I do a list of priorities,
Speaker 1: my primary list, and then I have a secondary list,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, okay, I'll try to get to that,
Speaker 1: but if I can't get to that secondary list today,
Speaker 1: it's okay, It'll roll over to tomorrow. If God gives
Speaker 1: me life, you know, and if it's God's will. Basically,
Speaker 1: it's what I said, and that helps me and that's
Speaker 1: helped me a lot. So I'm sure some of my
Speaker 1: business partners aren't the happiest with me right now, but
Speaker 1: I need to take care of my emotional and mental state.
Speaker 1: And I hope that through everything that I am sharing
Speaker 1: with you guys and i'm expressing, you guys can also
Speaker 1: learn to put yourself first in that aspect, you know,
Speaker 1: that's part of self care and self love, something we
Speaker 1: talk about on the podcast a lot. Because as much
Speaker 1: as I tell you guys and I give you guys
Speaker 1: advice and everything, I am also human and I also
Speaker 1: have to keep myself accountable and I also have to work.
Speaker 1: It's not like, oh, you know, I know everything and
Speaker 1: I don't have bad days, and no I'm I'm wrong
Speaker 1: with you guys. I'm honest with you guys. And this
Speaker 1: is why I feel like it's so important to share
Speaker 1: all of these things and hopefully through my experiences, you
Speaker 1: guys learn a thing or two. And touching on this
Speaker 1: like people pleaser thing that I can say, I'm recovering
Speaker 1: and it's going to be something I'm going to have
Speaker 1: to be intentional about, which is something that doesn't come easy.
Speaker 1: Remember we've talked about that being intentional, and it's something
Speaker 1: that I do. I want to make people happy. I
Speaker 1: love making people happy and for them to in a
Speaker 1: way of prove of me or not disappoint people. But
Speaker 1: it did. It was doing me no good, you know.
Speaker 1: And I've learned little by little to say no. And
Speaker 1: I think sometimes I do feel like I need to
Speaker 1: say yes to certain things because especially in my professional life,
Speaker 1: to like my manager or my record label and stuff,
Speaker 1: because if I don't say yes. And I also feel
Speaker 1: that pressure of like other people are also depending on me,
Speaker 1: Like I don't only just think about myself. I think
Speaker 1: about everyone else and all the other families that need
Speaker 1: to eat. And I'm like, well, maybe I can do that,
Speaker 1: even though a little part of me is like I
Speaker 1: don't have one hundred percent peace with that, but I'm
Speaker 1: gonna do it because I know other people are depending
Speaker 1: on me, you know. And also because I have this
Speaker 1: whole thing of like, oh, you know, Cheeky's can do it,
Speaker 1: or she's done it, and yes, I do want to
Speaker 1: be that example absolutely, like I'm like, Okay, if cheek
Speaker 1: is gonna do it, so can you. But sometimes I
Speaker 1: just like there's certain things that I just don't want
Speaker 1: to do. And now I'm getting to that point where
Speaker 1: I'm like, even though it's gonna make me a lot
Speaker 1: of money and make us a lot of money, like
Speaker 1: my camp, my team, I'm not going to do it
Speaker 1: because things are changing in my life, you know, and
Speaker 1: I want to be healthy and I don't want to
Speaker 1: have another breakdown. And as i'm speaking to you guys
Speaker 1: right now, I'm realizing there are certain things and I'm
Speaker 1: making mental notes right now that I have to say
Speaker 1: no too. And people are going to be disappointed, but
Speaker 1: I'm gonna be fine. And I don't mean to disturb
Speaker 1: anyone's life or hurt anyone, but if it's just too
Speaker 1: much right now, it's just too much. And then in
Speaker 1: my personal life, yes, I have been the head of
Speaker 1: my household and there are times, you guys, where I'm like,
Speaker 1: and I think I've mentioned it to you here that
Speaker 1: I've thought I'm gonna sell my house. That thought went away.
Speaker 1: It's slowly creeping back, and I'm like, I'm gonna sell
Speaker 1: it because and I love my house, or maybe I'm
Speaker 1: gonna rent it out just because I think. Am I
Speaker 1: doing all of this and everything that I'm doing because financially.
Speaker 1: I need to do it to keep up with the
Speaker 1: lifestyle that I've created for myself, which I'm very proud of.
Speaker 1: I'm very proud of of what I've been able to
Speaker 1: create and build. But I also just I just happiness.
Speaker 1: I feel like it comes in so many different shapes
Speaker 1: and sizes that I don't necessarily like, I don't know,
Speaker 1: Johnny moved out and all this stuff. So it's just
Speaker 1: so many things are coming to my mind and I'm
Speaker 1: unpacking it as I'm speaking to you guys right now.
Speaker 1: So I know that there's certain decisions that I need
Speaker 1: to make, and I have faith that or maybe I
Speaker 1: just need to save a little more. I don't know,
Speaker 1: but I do feel like that necessity of saying yes
Speaker 1: to certain things because I have to finance my life,
Speaker 1: you know, because it's me, and of course Emilio does
Speaker 1: his part. But at the end of the day, it's
Speaker 1: like we're still not married, Like I can't expect him
Speaker 1: to like pay for certain things and to like, you know,
Speaker 1: we'll have that conversation once we're married and we'll figure
Speaker 1: that out, you know. But in reality, like just thinking
Speaker 1: of my life and what I've done, I don't think
Speaker 1: it should be anyone else's responsibility but my own. So
Speaker 1: I'm gonna I don't know, I guess I in some ways,
Speaker 1: I just want to go back to basics, you know.
Speaker 1: And I'm going to give you guys a real life example.
Speaker 1: I don't know if if some of you may know
Speaker 1: this or not or whatever, but I was a judge
Speaker 1: on a show called and I did about I don't know,
Speaker 1: I think a few seasons, two or three seasons, and
Speaker 1: they wanted me to come back for the next season.
Speaker 1: And I had to say no because I realized, and
Speaker 1: this is another thing for you guys to to consider,
Speaker 1: is I started on the episodes while we were recording,
Speaker 1: I started just drinking, you know. I was like, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: you know. Instead of my in my in my water cup,
Speaker 1: instead of water, there was Tekla And I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get through these because we would record like
Speaker 1: two or three episodes in one night, so was it
Speaker 1: were long, and the energy was just a little off.
Speaker 1: And I was very grateful for the opportunity and it
Speaker 1: made us you know, it was good financially, but I
Speaker 1: just couldn't because my peace of mind and I just
Speaker 1: I wasn't there and I realized, I said, Okay, this
Speaker 1: isn't this is no longer fun for me because now
Speaker 1: I'm drinking and we're going back to twenty eighteen where
Speaker 1: I was drinking to get through it. And I'm like, okay.
Speaker 1: That was like an indication for me of like I
Speaker 1: need to say no and I need to put my
Speaker 1: foot down and even though people will be upset, I
Speaker 1: got to do it's best for myself, you know. And
Speaker 1: I've done that in my personal life as well, you know,
Speaker 1: even with things with my siblings when sometimes they want
Speaker 1: something and I have to just say no because I
Speaker 1: just don't feel peace with it. It's actually making me
Speaker 1: feel better to talk about this because it reminds me
Speaker 1: of how grateful I am at the end of the day.
Speaker 1: But the truth is that I need to go back
Speaker 1: to the drawing board and really set certain things straight
Speaker 1: within myself, within my career, business and everything to just
Speaker 1: make sure that I am happy, absolutely happy doing what
Speaker 1: I'm doing. Because I love to be productive, you guys,
Speaker 1: I think we all do. Again. I thrive off of
Speaker 1: feeling accomplished, but sometimes you just have to be. You
Speaker 1: just have to just be. The other day, I was
Speaker 1: trying to organize my closet, and I was like, Okay,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna do that. I got
Speaker 1: to a section because that's another thing, like I need
Speaker 1: my home to be organized and to be clean and
Speaker 1: everything to put be put in its place, especially with
Speaker 1: the tour and stuff because I'm not going to be
Speaker 1: home a lot, so I like to do it myself.
Speaker 1: But literally, I sat there and I finished a section,
Speaker 1: and I looked everywhere else and I just I said,
Speaker 1: I can't do this, like I just I can't. And
Speaker 1: you know what I did. I didn't. I stopped doing it,
Speaker 1: and I said, I have to delegate. I have to
Speaker 1: just have someone else do it. I literally for the
Speaker 1: rest of the day laid in bed, ordered some food
Speaker 1: because I didn't even want to cook, and I watch
Speaker 1: movies and that's what I did. And in my mind
Speaker 1: I had woken up that morning I said I'm going
Speaker 1: to organize my you know, my personal closet and my
Speaker 1: downstairs closet. And I ended up doing nothing, and I
Speaker 1: was fine. Before the old Gene would have been like,
Speaker 1: oh my god, I can't lay down like I would
Speaker 1: beat myself up about it. I would like like I
Speaker 1: felt guilty resting. And I've learned again throughout the years
Speaker 1: since twenty eighteen after my meltdown, that rest is essential.
Speaker 1: You guys, if you are not feeling like you want
Speaker 1: to do something, don't do it. Don't do it just
Speaker 1: to please someone else. Don't do it just because if
Speaker 1: you can. Of course, there's certain things that we just
Speaker 1: have to do, like going to work. I mean, we
Speaker 1: can't be calling off all the time, or if you've
Speaker 1: got to go to school, or there's just certain responsibilities
Speaker 1: like that we have to breathe through and like take
Speaker 1: deep breaths throughout the day. But if there's just certain
Speaker 1: things that aregist can wait, let them wait. And that's
Speaker 1: what I did, and I just I said, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: just do what I can today and that's helped me
Speaker 1: a lot as well. And right now I know what
Speaker 1: my focus is, and the focus is doing my best
Speaker 1: at my concerts and memorizing all of my songs and
Speaker 1: that's it. And it makes me feel good to say
Speaker 1: this is the focus right now, and everything else will
Speaker 1: happen when it needs to happen. And I'm not going
Speaker 1: to pressure myself anymore, because yes, I love to do lists.
Speaker 1: I love being productive. I love to say, oh I
Speaker 1: got all this done today, but it can wait, and
Speaker 1: it should wait for our mental health and our emotional health,
Speaker 1: you guys, because if we're not okay, then we're not
Speaker 1: going to do everything that we have to do with love,
Speaker 1: and we're not going to do it right. Most importantly,
Speaker 1: so this concludes our episode. Again, thank you so much
Speaker 1: for coming every week to listen to Cheeky's and chill
Speaker 1: or Dear Cheeky's. I am profoundly grateful for you, and
Speaker 1: I hope that from this episode you could take something
Speaker 1: that will help you and you can learn from my
Speaker 1: experiences so that you don't have a meltdown of your
Speaker 1: own again. If you are overwhelmed, just know that this too,
Speaker 1: shell pass. You will get through it, and we will
Speaker 1: be fine. We will be fine. Where there's a will,
Speaker 1: there's a way. No, that's very cliche, but it's true.
Speaker 1: Where there's a will, there's a way, and we have will,
Speaker 1: and we're strong and we're courageous and everything's gonna be good.
Speaker 1: Note to myself hashtag not to myself. To us, you guys,
Speaker 1: thank you so much. I love you, guys, very very
Speaker 1: much los Quiro, los Amo, and I will see you
Speaker 1: here on the next episode of Cheeky's and Show. This
Speaker 1: is a production of iHeartRadio and Mike Wura podcast Network.
Speaker 1: Follow us on Instagram at mike Uitura Podcasts and follow
Speaker 1: me Cheeky's That's c h I U s. For more
Speaker 1: podcasts from iHeart, visit the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or
Speaker 1: wherever you get your favorite shows.