WEBVTT - “I HOOKED UP WITH MY STRAIGHT FRIEND” 0:00:02.480 --> 0:00:03.760 Hello, Yo, what's up? 0:00:04.960 --> 0:00:05.120 Is this? 0:00:05.360 --> 0:00:05.560 Gik? 0:00:05.920 --> 0:00:06.160 Yeah? 0:00:06.160 --> 0:00:06.600 Who is this? 0:00:09.320 --> 0:00:12.080 I don't let me think of my name. I'm gonna 0:00:12.119 --> 0:00:12.639 go buy Aaron? 0:00:13.640 --> 0:00:15.760 Aaron? What's going on? How can I get you? 0:00:15.800 --> 0:00:17.640 Today? 0:00:19.400 --> 0:00:19.479 So? 0:00:21.239 --> 0:00:26.560 I have to take a med because I have epilepsy 0:00:28.240 --> 0:00:33.559 and something about this matters. It makes you like have 0:00:33.680 --> 0:00:39.279 crazy dreams because it's all FOAs for bipolar disorder. It's 0:00:39.280 --> 0:00:46.279 a psychotropic and I I was having a dream one 0:00:46.360 --> 0:00:49.040 day before I woke up, and I like, I peede 0:00:49.080 --> 0:00:51.479 the bed because I was dreaming. I was peeing. 0:00:57.000 --> 0:00:58.760 That's not what you wanted to talk about. You texted 0:00:58.800 --> 0:01:00.880 me and you said you almost slept with your. 0:01:01.240 --> 0:01:03.720 Yeah, no that I texted you twice. 0:01:04.240 --> 0:01:09.000 Okay, yeah, we all be the bed. Yeah that's fine. 0:01:09.440 --> 0:01:12.160 Yeah No, I almost almost with my straight best friend. 0:01:12.600 --> 0:01:13.320 How did that happen? 0:01:15.880 --> 0:01:18.080 He was asking me about it. He said he was 0:01:18.200 --> 0:01:26.520 a little curious, and I was like, okay, let's we can. 0:01:26.560 --> 0:01:33.840 We can try something if you'd like, And then we 0:01:33.920 --> 0:01:38.560 made out and then he almost like, no, it didn't 0:01:38.600 --> 0:01:45.800 actually happen. That's why I said it almost didn't. I 0:01:45.880 --> 0:01:50.000 didn't go any further further than like grabbing or anything. 0:01:51.160 --> 0:01:53.120 I don't know it's now that I'm saying out loud, 0:01:53.160 --> 0:01:53.960 it sounds kind of boring. 0:01:55.800 --> 0:02:00.200 It doesn't sound boring, but it's it sounds like does 0:02:00.240 --> 0:02:03.040 your what what? So you're okay, I mean your friend 0:02:03.080 --> 0:02:06.520 wanted to try it? What was his review of of 0:02:06.600 --> 0:02:07.280 being gay? 0:02:13.120 --> 0:02:14.919 I'm trying to think what what did he say? I 0:02:14.960 --> 0:02:18.280 remember he was like, okay, I'm not gay. It's like, okay, 0:02:18.320 --> 0:02:18.840 I'm straight. 0:02:20.120 --> 0:02:22.960 You know what. I respect. I respect that. I respect 0:02:22.960 --> 0:02:25.160 the hell out of that to be like, you know what, 0:02:25.960 --> 0:02:28.960 I'm gonna give it a shot and see if I 0:02:29.040 --> 0:02:31.600 like it, and it turns out he did? 0:02:31.639 --> 0:02:32.080 You know he? 0:02:32.280 --> 0:02:36.200 I mean, that's I respect his willingness to uh to 0:02:36.360 --> 0:02:39.160 expand his universe, you know what I mean. 0:02:40.000 --> 0:02:43.320 Yeah. It was a little surprising though, because he has 0:02:43.360 --> 0:02:46.760 been very openly and outwardly homophobic. 0:02:47.800 --> 0:02:57.160 Oh okay, I I kind of I kind of It 0:02:57.240 --> 0:03:02.800 sounds like, uh, he is uh uh compensating. 0:03:05.480 --> 0:03:08.000 He went so far in the other direction. He came 0:03:08.040 --> 0:03:10.320 back around how. 0:03:10.200 --> 0:03:13.960 Long has he been like being homophobic for? And then 0:03:14.040 --> 0:03:16.600 what was it like when he was like, you know what, foh, 0:03:17.400 --> 0:03:18.800 I don't know why I've been hating. Let me give 0:03:18.840 --> 0:03:19.320 it a try. 0:03:20.600 --> 0:03:23.200 It was for I mean this this was a couple 0:03:23.200 --> 0:03:24.520 of months ago. This is at the start of the year. 0:03:24.520 --> 0:03:27.440 But he has been homophobic for as long as I've 0:03:27.600 --> 0:03:34.400 known him. I I've met him last year and we 0:03:34.560 --> 0:03:43.600 become we became really close. And yeah, he's also he's 0:03:43.600 --> 0:03:47.280 also like he's also really one for like cuddling too. 0:03:47.360 --> 0:03:49.360 I was a little a little shocked when he asked 0:03:49.360 --> 0:03:52.880 me to cuddle the first time. I don't really talk 0:03:52.920 --> 0:03:53.680 so much anymore. 0:03:55.040 --> 0:04:00.880 Uh listen, I'm know whatever, but I think this guy 0:04:00.960 --> 0:04:04.360 sounds a little gay. 0:04:04.560 --> 0:04:05.440 That's what I said. 0:04:09.480 --> 0:04:09.560 What. 0:04:09.800 --> 0:04:13.240 Uh so, okay, you guys became friends. But did he 0:04:13.320 --> 0:04:15.720 know that you were gay? 0:04:16.160 --> 0:04:17.520 Yeah? 0:04:18.000 --> 0:04:20.760 Okay, did he like like did he like ream you 0:04:20.920 --> 0:04:21.920 about it or whatever? 0:04:24.040 --> 0:04:25.760 He was a little uncomfortable to be alone with me 0:04:25.800 --> 0:04:27.799 at first, but I had to. I was like, what 0:04:27.800 --> 0:04:31.960 what is your problem? Like what is your what's your beef? 0:04:33.200 --> 0:04:33.560 Mm hmm. 0:04:34.160 --> 0:04:39.520 But yeah, like, I mean, it took him a minute 0:04:39.560 --> 0:04:44.000 to figure out, like there's nothing wrong with me, Like 0:04:44.279 --> 0:04:48.040 I'm fine, I'm not gonna like do anything. 0:04:50.160 --> 0:04:53.520 I maybe it's maybe he was afraid. He wasn't afraid 0:04:53.520 --> 0:04:55.240 that you were going to do anything. He was afraid 0:04:55.279 --> 0:04:57.880 that he was going to do something like ask you 0:04:58.040 --> 0:05:00.680 to make out with him? 0:05:00.720 --> 0:05:07.880 Maybe maybe that Actually that sounds Yeah, he's a really 0:05:07.920 --> 0:05:09.000 he was a real shitty kisser. 0:05:12.200 --> 0:05:17.720 What why did you stop hanging out with him? 0:05:17.920 --> 0:05:20.640 We just sort of lost contact. We we went our 0:05:20.880 --> 0:05:27.880 like own ways. I moved away, and we we just 0:05:27.880 --> 0:05:35.200 sort of stopped talking. I don't know the Yeah. Also, 0:05:35.240 --> 0:05:38.279 he had a really he got a really controlling girlfriend. 0:05:42.520 --> 0:05:45.520 Did his controlling girlfriend tell him that he couldn't make 0:05:45.560 --> 0:05:46.600 out with guys? 0:05:50.880 --> 0:05:55.480 No, but she was really suspicious of me and him. 0:05:55.640 --> 0:05:57.520 Was he dating this girl? Was he dad? Was he 0:05:57.600 --> 0:06:02.719 dating this girl when you guys made out? But yeah, 0:06:05.200 --> 0:06:06.560 oh so so she was right? 0:06:08.760 --> 0:06:12.600 Yeah, actually no, no, no, let me think of the time. 0:06:12.920 --> 0:06:14.599 It was a little bit before they started dating. 0:06:15.040 --> 0:06:17.159 Oh okay, all right, that's a key detail. 0:06:19.040 --> 0:06:22.480 Yeah. And then me and him went to Niagara Falls together, 0:06:22.520 --> 0:06:23.560 like with his mom. 0:06:24.400 --> 0:06:27.599 That's the gayest thing YouTube done so far that you've 0:06:27.600 --> 0:06:27.919 told me. 0:06:30.440 --> 0:06:33.120 Yeah, we went to Niagara Falls together. We went around 0:06:33.200 --> 0:06:35.600 Niaga Fall together, I mean his mom. Yeah. 0:06:36.320 --> 0:06:39.240 And that's that's that's scarier than the than the kissing 0:06:39.279 --> 0:06:39.920 and the cuddling. 0:06:43.480 --> 0:06:53.040 He we we had to like sit on a bed 0:06:53.880 --> 0:06:56.200 and she she didn't like that. Like his his girlfriend 0:06:56.200 --> 0:07:01.279 didn't like it. She wanted me to be on a 0:07:01.279 --> 0:07:06.960 different side than him. 0:07:07.120 --> 0:07:09.080 Were you were you guys hooking up while he was 0:07:09.120 --> 0:07:09.760 with this girl? 0:07:11.520 --> 0:07:14.640 No, it never went anything more than that. I mean 0:07:14.760 --> 0:07:19.440 we saw each other naked before and we had maked out. 0:07:19.640 --> 0:07:20.080 So did. 0:07:21.520 --> 0:07:22.360 Well what about you? 0:07:22.440 --> 0:07:22.520 Like? 0:07:22.560 --> 0:07:24.880 Did you like it? Sounds like you kind of liked 0:07:24.960 --> 0:07:27.200 this guy, Like did you like him or what was 0:07:27.320 --> 0:07:28.160 what was your deal? 0:07:29.440 --> 0:07:32.200 I did like him, I did. I did like him, 0:07:32.240 --> 0:07:36.680 and he did like take a big toll on me, 0:07:40.960 --> 0:07:43.280 But I kind of I kind of got past him, 0:07:43.560 --> 0:07:46.240 especially after I was like, Okay, he's like a bitch. 0:07:48.240 --> 0:07:50.800 What what was the definitive thing that made you decide 0:07:50.800 --> 0:07:51.480 he was a bitch? 0:07:54.600 --> 0:07:57.560 The way I saw him treating women. I'd never noticed 0:07:57.600 --> 0:08:02.200 that till like I looked. I was blind I was. 0:08:02.240 --> 0:08:04.920 I had been blindsided for such a long time. But 0:08:04.960 --> 0:08:06.920 then I'd like finally put my eyes on it and 0:08:07.000 --> 0:08:10.880 I was like, oh, oh no, get out of here. 0:08:11.360 --> 0:08:12.440 What was what was he doing? 0:08:19.000 --> 0:08:19.200 Well? 0:08:19.240 --> 0:08:21.280 I gotta think because this was a couple months ago. 0:08:22.400 --> 0:08:24.120 That's also another thing my med does that it makes 0:08:24.240 --> 0:08:32.400 my brain foggy. He well, also not also him being 0:08:32.400 --> 0:08:37.800 like a horrendous mama's boy, being like a being terrible 0:08:37.840 --> 0:08:39.280 to her, not not be being a mama's boy, but 0:08:39.320 --> 0:08:44.679 being terrible to his mom. But what he was doing, Uh, 0:08:44.840 --> 0:08:47.800 he would always complain about his girlfriend and like his 0:08:48.200 --> 0:08:51.080 the female friends around him. And I was kind of 0:08:51.080 --> 0:08:56.200 done hearing that. I was like, oh so what so 0:08:56.240 --> 0:08:56.720 what was it? 0:08:56.760 --> 0:09:00.080 What was it that made you like this guy? 0:09:02.600 --> 0:09:04.440 Me and him clicked at first, Like if it was 0:09:04.480 --> 0:09:06.320 just me and him one on one, we clicked. We 0:09:06.320 --> 0:09:12.400 had a lot of the same interests. We liked, we 0:09:12.520 --> 0:09:21.000 liked going to dead malls. Yeah, he was easy to 0:09:21.040 --> 0:09:23.080 talk to at first. 0:09:25.440 --> 0:09:27.080 What did you mean when you said he took a 0:09:27.120 --> 0:09:27.680 toll on you? 0:09:30.240 --> 0:09:40.320 He's very mentally draining that That's what I mean by 0:09:40.320 --> 0:09:47.559 a toll in what way? Like socially? 0:09:49.040 --> 0:09:49.440 Mm hmm. 0:09:50.040 --> 0:09:51.760 I don't know. I feel like I sounded and uh 0:09:53.200 --> 0:09:53.920 dumb right now? 0:09:54.640 --> 0:09:56.040 Why Why do you hold on? Why do you feel 0:09:56.040 --> 0:09:57.040 like you sound dumb right now? 0:09:58.559 --> 0:10:02.280 Because I thought I didn't. I thought I I didn't 0:10:02.280 --> 0:10:03.079 know what I was talking about. 0:10:03.559 --> 0:10:05.559 No, we're just we're having a conversation. Don't sound dumb 0:10:05.559 --> 0:10:05.839 at all? 0:10:06.640 --> 0:10:09.360 Yeah, okay, okay, who. 0:10:09.160 --> 0:10:10.240 Do you have a crush on anyone? 0:10:10.240 --> 0:10:10.400 Now? 0:10:10.400 --> 0:10:11.360 What's your deal? Now? 0:10:13.360 --> 0:10:21.840 No, I'm just kind of single and by myself, probably 0:10:21.840 --> 0:10:24.240 for the not for the better. That sounds that sounds 0:10:24.320 --> 0:10:31.320 makes it sound like I'm crazy, but I guess for 0:10:31.400 --> 0:10:31.760 the better. 0:10:34.679 --> 0:10:36.520 What's this guy doing now? Do you have any idea? 0:10:36.640 --> 0:10:41.520 Or is do you just not keep any tabs on him? 0:10:41.720 --> 0:10:48.120 He is staying at home by himself. Apparently he's like 0:10:48.240 --> 0:10:58.719 working for the the city not the city state for 0:10:58.880 --> 0:11:03.160 his mom because mom, uh, she she has a hard 0:11:03.200 --> 0:11:13.760 time going around the places by herself. But yeah, he's 0:11:13.800 --> 0:11:17.360 just staying home now. I tried to ask him to, 0:11:17.600 --> 0:11:25.880 like m hang out sometime soon, but he wasn't really interested. 0:11:29.080 --> 0:11:31.440 Are you you said you're single for the better? 0:11:31.480 --> 0:11:31.680 Are you? 0:11:31.760 --> 0:11:33.680 Are you enjoying being single? 0:11:35.320 --> 0:11:38.160 I'm enjoying. It's been good. 0:11:39.000 --> 0:11:52.360 It's good. It's good. Is there anything else that you 0:11:52.440 --> 0:11:55.559 wanted to say to the people of the computer before 0:11:55.559 --> 0:11:55.880 we go? 0:12:01.280 --> 0:12:06.559 Don't fall for your uh street best friend. It can 0:12:06.600 --> 0:12:09.240 save you a lot of time wasted. 0:12:12.240 --> 0:12:12.959 Thank you for calling? 0:12:14.160 --> 0:12:15.120 Yep, thank you? 0:12:20.040 --> 0:12:20.360 Hello? 0:12:22.480 --> 0:12:23.920 Hello, Hi? 0:12:25.760 --> 0:12:27.160 Hi? What hey? 0:12:27.520 --> 0:12:27.679 Hi? 0:12:27.800 --> 0:12:28.400 Can you hear me? 0:12:29.400 --> 0:12:29.600 Yeah? 0:12:29.640 --> 0:12:31.320 Am I on your headphones or something? 0:12:31.880 --> 0:12:32.000 No? 0:12:32.200 --> 0:12:35.559 Sorry, it's just about. I'm on the Brooklyn Breads. 0:12:36.240 --> 0:12:38.559 Jenny, you said you're on the Brooklyn. 0:12:39.960 --> 0:12:43.360 Yeah, I'm on the Brooklyn Brids just walking down. 0:12:44.840 --> 0:12:48.040 Are you there's a DJ on the bridge? 0:12:49.559 --> 0:12:49.760 Yeah? 0:12:49.880 --> 0:12:51.000 Man, he's going for it. 0:12:51.200 --> 0:12:52.680 He's got a can of beer? 0:12:55.000 --> 0:12:57.160 Is he? Is there like a concert going on or something? 0:13:00.240 --> 0:13:03.040 There's like little old ladies dancing rooms? 0:13:04.000 --> 0:13:06.839 All right, my concert? I think it's just sat up there. 0:13:08.080 --> 0:13:10.480 Where are you from? Are you Irish? 0:13:11.480 --> 0:13:12.040 Scottish? 0:13:12.960 --> 0:13:13.480 Oh? 0:13:13.559 --> 0:13:15.439 Okay, we're in Scotland. 0:13:17.440 --> 0:13:17.960 Glasgow. 0:13:18.720 --> 0:13:22.160 Oh I'm going to Glasgow in November. 0:13:22.240 --> 0:13:27.400 Really yeah, yeah that would be Wait where are you 0:13:27.720 --> 0:13:29.000 going in Glasgow for it? 0:13:30.400 --> 0:13:33.440 I don't know off the top of my head. I 0:13:33.440 --> 0:13:34.439 don't know off the top. 0:13:34.280 --> 0:13:37.800 Of my head, but as okay. 0:13:40.360 --> 0:13:44.160 But let's see here. I mean, Gemma, is there anything 0:13:44.200 --> 0:13:46.520 you have to talk about today while you're on the bridge. 0:13:46.559 --> 0:13:48.880 Has it inspired something within you to talk to a 0:13:48.880 --> 0:13:49.560 gecko about? 0:13:51.880 --> 0:13:52.120 Yeah? 0:13:52.280 --> 0:13:55.760 I thought I would call because like even when I 0:13:55.840 --> 0:13:57.280 was on the bridge, you know, I was like checking 0:13:57.280 --> 0:13:59.920 my phone there and look on Instagram and I saw 0:14:00.040 --> 0:14:03.120 that you were like alive, and I don't know, I 0:14:03.240 --> 0:14:06.679 just I've got this like busted up feeling in my stomach, 0:14:07.480 --> 0:14:11.080 and I like think it's like excitement, and I've never 0:14:11.080 --> 0:14:13.240 been in America before, so I'm like, wow, it's amazing. 0:14:13.800 --> 0:14:18.560 I also feel like that feeling is like dreads, Like 0:14:18.760 --> 0:14:21.000 it just seems too good. I feel like something bad 0:14:21.200 --> 0:14:21.960 is about to happen. 0:14:25.520 --> 0:14:29.360 Your excitement, your excitement yeah, oh yeah yeah, your excitement 0:14:29.360 --> 0:14:30.320 it turns into dread. 0:14:33.120 --> 0:14:35.720 Yeah, Like it's just like this horrible pet and my 0:14:35.760 --> 0:14:38.280 stomach feeling them. But like is that butterflies or is 0:14:38.280 --> 0:14:41.440 that like like you know, like even right now, I'm 0:14:41.440 --> 0:14:42.640 like anxious. 0:14:43.000 --> 0:14:46.800 I don't know that I'm talking to you on the phone. 0:14:48.000 --> 0:14:50.360 Yeah, that's happened. That happens to me. How long have 0:14:50.440 --> 0:14:51.600 you been in America for? 0:14:53.400 --> 0:14:53.640 Uh? 0:14:53.760 --> 0:14:54.320 Sex days? 0:14:55.480 --> 0:14:58.720 Are you here by yourself? Yeah? 0:14:59.280 --> 0:15:02.600 I I've got a friend from Pittsburgh who just moved 0:15:02.640 --> 0:15:05.840 to New York, so I see her about, but I'm 0:15:05.840 --> 0:15:06.200 just here. 0:15:07.640 --> 0:15:11.240 Are you, Like, are you on vacation or are you? Like? 0:15:11.320 --> 0:15:11.880 How what are you? 0:15:13.720 --> 0:15:18.880 I'm like, I'm tatooing a little bit, and I'm like 0:15:19.000 --> 0:15:22.000 mostly partying and walking about, but like i'll tastoo. We 0:15:22.120 --> 0:15:24.880 got to make some money, you're do you? 0:15:25.080 --> 0:15:26.600 I'm sorry, I have no idea what you just said 0:15:26.640 --> 0:15:27.640 you said you're tapped in. 0:15:29.240 --> 0:15:35.480 No, I'm a tattoo artist, so I'll tattoo while i'm here. 0:15:35.840 --> 0:15:38.400 Oh, you're a tattoo artist. Okay, are you all right? 0:15:38.440 --> 0:15:41.600 So you're doing yet? Now I've heard about this. People 0:15:41.640 --> 0:15:45.400 will like go to different cities and like kind of 0:15:45.520 --> 0:15:48.840 kind of set up and do do a run tattooing people. 0:15:49.040 --> 0:15:50.840 Yeah, it's a guest spot. 0:15:51.120 --> 0:15:54.440 Yeah, yeah, I guess, guess guest spot. Yeah, I've heard 0:15:54.440 --> 0:15:54.840 about that. 0:15:55.400 --> 0:15:58.840 I've been like walking about Times Square, Gavin Stecker's and 0:15:59.400 --> 0:16:02.160 business car wooring myself. 0:16:02.200 --> 0:16:05.920 I l how's the tattoo how's the tattooing? How's the 0:16:05.960 --> 0:16:08.920 tattooing business been going? Have you? Have you been with 0:16:09.000 --> 0:16:10.680 the tattoo a lot of people while you've been here? 0:16:11.920 --> 0:16:15.040 No, I've got one person tomorrow and then two at 0:16:15.080 --> 0:16:16.640 the end of the week, so it won't be too bad, 0:16:17.640 --> 0:16:21.880 Like it's not You can charge more money for tattoos 0:16:21.880 --> 0:16:25.600 in America than Glasgow. It's like more expensive here. So 0:16:26.200 --> 0:16:27.600 I think I'll be okay if I get a few 0:16:27.600 --> 0:16:33.560 people in, like, I'm good. You know, how long are you? 0:16:34.960 --> 0:16:36.640 How long are how long are you staying in New York? 0:16:36.680 --> 0:16:40.560 For for them months, for the whole month. 0:16:42.040 --> 0:16:45.160 Yeah. See, I was like, I'm incredibly lucky because I 0:16:45.160 --> 0:16:47.840 get to do this, so I should be happy, and 0:16:47.880 --> 0:16:50.520 I am, but I'm just I just feel like something 0:16:50.600 --> 0:16:55.160 fucking SHOT's gonna have like a catastrophe. 0:16:54.600 --> 0:16:55.320 While I'm here. 0:16:56.320 --> 0:16:58.080 Do you is that? Have you had a lot of 0:16:58.120 --> 0:17:00.000 catastrophes happened to you? 0:17:02.560 --> 0:17:09.000 I've had like, like, yeah, I've had a few, like 0:17:09.000 --> 0:17:10.680 like you know, when you know where you're when your 0:17:10.680 --> 0:17:14.080 issues them from like math mom died like six years 0:17:14.119 --> 0:17:18.360 ago suddenly, and I think since then, it's just kind 0:17:18.400 --> 0:17:18.760 of like. 0:17:20.560 --> 0:17:22.720 I don't know, it doesn't matter what I'm doing, I 0:17:22.720 --> 0:17:24.880 still just have this thing that, oh, someone's gonna die 0:17:25.000 --> 0:17:29.640 or someone's going to like something bad's gonna happen. It's 0:17:29.640 --> 0:17:31.920 like kind of a fucking buzz cow because I'm trying 0:17:31.920 --> 0:17:33.800 to have like a good time and that's why you 0:17:34.160 --> 0:17:35.679 be happy. 0:17:35.760 --> 0:17:41.040 Yeah, yeah, yeah, No, I get that. I get that. 0:17:41.119 --> 0:17:44.600 I've had that happen before. No, Because you think there's 0:17:44.640 --> 0:17:48.560 like a thing where you don't want to let yourself 0:17:48.640 --> 0:17:52.280 get too happy or excited because that happiness and excitement 0:17:52.320 --> 0:17:55.920 could be taken away from you through some form of catastrophe. 0:17:56.520 --> 0:18:01.200 So you never let yourself be anything, and you kind 0:18:01.200 --> 0:18:05.720 of make your mood just a little bit whatever enough 0:18:05.880 --> 0:18:09.560 so that you're not actually emotionally risking anything and you 0:18:09.560 --> 0:18:13.600 don't have attachment to anything, and then you fucking yeah, 0:18:13.640 --> 0:18:14.960 and then you fucking due. 0:18:14.920 --> 0:18:18.840 Me absolutely exactly exactly. 0:18:22.119 --> 0:18:26.560 What do you I've been talking about that in therapy myself, 0:18:26.760 --> 0:18:31.160 to be honest, what do you do about it? Well, 0:18:31.240 --> 0:18:33.080 I don't know. I've been thinking about this a lot 0:18:33.359 --> 0:18:38.680 because it's a it's a dumb way to live. It's 0:18:38.720 --> 0:18:45.720 really stupid, because what's the point of of what's the 0:18:45.760 --> 0:18:50.160 point of life if you're just gonna not allow yourself 0:18:50.840 --> 0:18:53.440 to care about anything. I used to be real and 0:18:53.480 --> 0:18:58.440 I still am, you know, you know, into stoicism, which 0:18:58.480 --> 0:19:02.800 is the idea that you don't uh a little bit, 0:19:02.840 --> 0:19:06.720 the idea that you kind of don't allow yourself to 0:19:06.760 --> 0:19:11.439 be happy as a result of anything external, and you 0:19:11.560 --> 0:19:16.760 kind of keep it all internal, which protects you, because 0:19:17.119 --> 0:19:20.480 which protects you from the external ship that's out of 0:19:20.480 --> 0:19:22.919 your control. But at the same time it's kind of 0:19:23.040 --> 0:19:26.080 just as bland. I feel. I've been living like that 0:19:26.280 --> 0:19:28.760 for a while, and it does, it does get bland, 0:19:29.600 --> 0:19:32.439 and so I don't know. I think there's a second 0:19:32.600 --> 0:19:34.879 there's there's like just an aspect of like, all right, 0:19:34.880 --> 0:19:38.760 I'm going to take the risk of allowing myself to 0:19:38.760 --> 0:19:41.760 be happy, which is tough. What were you going to say? 0:19:44.040 --> 0:19:52.800 I can't remember. There's there's another one right upstartism that's like, remember, well, 0:19:53.000 --> 0:19:55.280 person does that stuff, but it's supposed to be like 0:19:55.400 --> 0:19:59.960 the craziness and ship itsness of the universe and being 0:20:00.040 --> 0:20:02.440 soul bag and the ensign can happen at any moment 0:20:02.520 --> 0:20:06.240 if it supposed to like kind of like be happy 0:20:06.280 --> 0:20:08.359 with that because you have no control over it. But 0:20:09.520 --> 0:20:11.880 it's easier to see it than to fucking do it. 0:20:13.000 --> 0:20:16.439 Oh yeah, all this ship is easier to say than 0:20:16.560 --> 0:20:19.160 do I. Do you know how many things I say 0:20:19.280 --> 0:20:24.240 on this podcast? Uh? And then two seconds later my 0:20:25.000 --> 0:20:29.280 brain is acting in a complete fucking way where it's like, oh, 0:20:29.280 --> 0:20:32.800 I just told people to allow themselves to be happy. 0:20:32.840 --> 0:20:34.320 I should do that myself. 0:20:36.680 --> 0:20:38.320 As good as I say, not as I do. 0:20:39.840 --> 0:20:41.240 What What are you gonna do in the rest of 0:20:41.280 --> 0:20:43.480 New York time? Are you gonna get it a bagel? 0:20:45.600 --> 0:20:48.440 I've had a bagel. I had a bagel already, it was. 0:20:49.480 --> 0:20:51.600 It was all right. I think I ordered it wrong, 0:20:51.840 --> 0:20:52.840 but it was still good. 0:20:54.080 --> 0:20:55.760 How do you order a bagel wrong? 0:20:57.359 --> 0:21:01.320 I thought. I didn't realize that it was like sanguage options. 0:21:01.359 --> 0:21:02.679 I just thought the only thing you could put on 0:21:02.720 --> 0:21:03.520 it was cream cheese. 0:21:03.680 --> 0:21:04.320 I don't know why. 0:21:05.119 --> 0:21:07.000 It was just like a lot of different cream cheeses 0:21:07.800 --> 0:21:10.439 and I was overwhelmed and I just got a bagel 0:21:10.480 --> 0:21:13.520 with cream cheese, which was nice. But I can get 0:21:13.520 --> 0:21:15.400 that like pretty much anywhere. 0:21:17.359 --> 0:21:20.879 Yeah, but what do you have anything on your Do 0:21:20.920 --> 0:21:22.639 you have anything on your new Wait, so this is 0:21:22.680 --> 0:21:27.120 your first six days in America. You've never been to America. 0:21:27.840 --> 0:21:29.440 Yeah, it's fucking crazy. 0:21:30.000 --> 0:21:31.760 What do you think? Like, what's your take? 0:21:35.359 --> 0:21:38.800 I feel people are nicer than I thought, Like I 0:21:38.800 --> 0:21:41.639 got to old New Yorkers where like they don't what 0:21:41.800 --> 0:21:46.040 fuck with you? But I think it's uh, the first 0:21:46.080 --> 0:21:51.520 weird no offense. It's like really hard to find, like 0:21:52.880 --> 0:21:57.920 I don't know, just just like a grocery store. I 0:21:57.960 --> 0:22:04.600 don't know, but it's massive, like it's overwhelmingly fucking massive. 0:22:05.280 --> 0:22:06.200 But it's beautiful. 0:22:07.119 --> 0:22:09.639 I've never seen it something like this in my life, 0:22:09.640 --> 0:22:09.960 And I. 0:22:09.880 --> 0:22:11.760 Thought, I don't know, you know, when you see something 0:22:11.760 --> 0:22:13.000 in a movie so many times and. 0:22:12.920 --> 0:22:15.320 When you get there, you're like, oh my god, God, 0:22:15.600 --> 0:22:18.960 like this is where the ship happens, which I think 0:22:19.040 --> 0:22:20.360 is also what makes me paranoid. 0:22:21.800 --> 0:22:25.760 Really, So when you say you've never seen anything like 0:22:25.760 --> 0:22:27.600 this before, what do you What are you seeing here 0:22:27.600 --> 0:22:30.000 that you've never seen before? Because you are? I mean, 0:22:30.040 --> 0:22:31.720 Glasgow is also a pretty big city. 0:22:33.320 --> 0:22:37.280 No, I mean it's not sorry, sorry, I just wanting someone. 0:22:37.480 --> 0:22:38.760 And that's that. 0:22:40.280 --> 0:22:41.920 I've never seen it and it's big and it's better. 0:22:42.040 --> 0:22:44.520 It's that's like glasses small, like our subway goes around 0:22:44.520 --> 0:22:48.119 in a circle, but it's it's a small city where 0:22:48.160 --> 0:22:50.320 like right now I'm like looking out onto the river. 0:22:51.200 --> 0:22:54.560 I'm seeing the buildings like they're fucking ginormous, but I 0:22:54.600 --> 0:22:58.320 can't Like I've been to London and stuff, but like 0:22:58.480 --> 0:23:02.679 this is insane. I feel like an ant in a 0:23:02.760 --> 0:23:04.720 good way. 0:23:05.160 --> 0:23:06.720 Is there anything else that you're going to try to 0:23:06.720 --> 0:23:07.400 do while you're here? 0:23:12.280 --> 0:23:16.480 Uh, this tattoo. I think that's the main thing. I 0:23:16.520 --> 0:23:19.600 got a tattoo and just walk about the city like 0:23:19.600 --> 0:23:21.080 like right now, I can't believe this is for free, 0:23:21.160 --> 0:23:23.160 you know, like need to charge me. I just got 0:23:23.200 --> 0:23:25.240 on the bridge. I'm seeing like the best sights ever. 0:23:26.760 --> 0:23:29.159 Oh, you can't believe that they don't charge you to 0:23:29.359 --> 0:23:31.359 walk across the bridge. 0:23:32.080 --> 0:23:33.960 Yeah, I feel like I feel like I've been charged 0:23:33.960 --> 0:23:37.200 for so much stuff here, Like I do you know what, Actually, Joe, 0:23:37.320 --> 0:23:40.040 I've got I've got a vape like at shop I 0:23:40.080 --> 0:23:42.560 lost Mary and it was thirty dollars. 0:23:43.160 --> 0:23:46.520