WEBVTT - Episode 79: Ft. Kreesha Turner 0:00:03.560 --> 0:00:06.760 What's up is Angela? Ye, it's lip service. I'm GG McGuire. 0:00:07.040 --> 0:00:09.440 Stephanie is on a delayed flight so should be here momentarily, 0:00:09.440 --> 0:00:14.080 but we got Creature Turner here with us. By the way, 0:00:14.080 --> 0:00:15.560 you should check because I know there's a lot of 0:00:15.920 --> 0:00:19.000 storms and I'm flying to Toronto, and Toronto had a 0:00:19.000 --> 0:00:23.080 snowstorm last night, so maybe okay, we'll keep our friends 0:00:23.400 --> 0:00:26.640 here a little bit longer with you all right now. 0:00:26.680 --> 0:00:28.320 We always start lip service once with the tip of 0:00:28.360 --> 0:00:31.200 the day, and today's tip is when you're with somebody 0:00:31.200 --> 0:00:33.760 who has kids, how and you break up? How do 0:00:33.800 --> 0:00:35.760 you break up with the kids? Do you still keep 0:00:35.760 --> 0:00:38.760 in touch or do you have to cut off contact? 0:00:38.840 --> 0:00:42.680 What's your tip your advice for that. That's a hard one. 0:00:43.040 --> 0:00:48.920 I've actually experienced that, And just because the kid was 0:00:49.040 --> 0:00:53.840 young enough that I didn't necessarily think that they remember 0:00:53.920 --> 0:00:58.360 me if I kind of detached immediately, low and behold. 0:00:58.480 --> 0:01:00.960 Like two years later, this girl, a little girl was 0:01:00.960 --> 0:01:03.880 that my autograph signing, and she was so excited to 0:01:03.960 --> 0:01:06.520 see me from my from an ex relationship, and she 0:01:06.600 --> 0:01:09.360 came with her grandparents and they came to see me. 0:01:09.600 --> 0:01:12.039 So it doesn't always actually work out the wa that 0:01:12.160 --> 0:01:14.840 you planed. She wasn't mad. She wasn't mad at all. 0:01:15.319 --> 0:01:17.200 She was so excited to see me. I didn't think 0:01:17.240 --> 0:01:19.000 she would remember me because at the time she was four. 0:01:20.319 --> 0:01:23.440 But I cold turkey did. It's hard to break up 0:01:23.440 --> 0:01:25.280 with somebody who has a kid because then you kind 0:01:25.280 --> 0:01:27.480 of missed the kids. It kind of sometimes makes you 0:01:27.520 --> 0:01:30.680 stay longer. It's true, It's very true. It's a hard thing. 0:01:30.800 --> 0:01:33.680 I personally, like I said, I call I cut it cold, 0:01:33.760 --> 0:01:37.200 just because I felt like, how do you even explain 0:01:37.280 --> 0:01:40.000 that now? If the kid was older, if it's older, 0:01:40.120 --> 0:01:41.680 if they're older, I feel like you would have to 0:01:41.720 --> 0:01:44.800 sit down and have a conversation, um, because they're gonna 0:01:45.160 --> 0:01:47.080 you know, they might even have your number by that point, 0:01:47.080 --> 0:01:48.920 and they might text you and I ask you, like, yo, 0:01:49.040 --> 0:01:51.520 where you at? Like we ain't going to the to 0:01:51.560 --> 0:01:53.880 the ball game this weekend or whatever else it is. 0:01:53.960 --> 0:01:56.320 But that's a hard one. I think once at a 0:01:56.360 --> 0:01:57.880 certain age, you kind of have to talk them through 0:01:57.920 --> 0:02:01.520 it right, explained to them like, you know, me and 0:02:01.560 --> 0:02:04.640 your dad aren't cool anymore like that, So I'm going 0:02:04.680 --> 0:02:06.280 to have to be at a more of a distance. 0:02:06.320 --> 0:02:08.880 But if there's something important that you want to let 0:02:08.919 --> 0:02:11.360 me know, you know, let me know if you got 0:02:11.400 --> 0:02:14.160 an amazing graint on your exam or whatever else. It 0:02:14.200 --> 0:02:16.400 is like, what if they're like, what about on their birthday? 0:02:16.400 --> 0:02:19.600 Do you send a message? Do you call say happy birthday? 0:02:19.639 --> 0:02:21.200 Do you get a gift? Do you get it? I 0:02:21.560 --> 0:02:24.240 think that would also have to have a conversation with 0:02:24.280 --> 0:02:28.160 the former significant other, ask them if they'd be cool 0:02:28.160 --> 0:02:30.600 with that, like do you still mind that, yeah, they're 0:02:30.600 --> 0:02:32.919 still the parent. Have that conversation with them, and then 0:02:33.360 --> 0:02:35.480 have it with the kid as well and feel it out, 0:02:35.600 --> 0:02:38.160 like you can't. Every situation is going to be different, 0:02:38.720 --> 0:02:40.760 and every child is going to be different. But that 0:02:40.880 --> 0:02:42.959 is definitely a hard one to do, especially you like, 0:02:43.000 --> 0:02:46.639 I hate my dad? Can I come stay with you? 0:02:46.880 --> 0:02:55.800 I calm down and discuss this through. That not good 0:02:55.840 --> 0:02:57.600 at all. I don't think I would be able to 0:02:57.600 --> 0:03:00.560 break up with the kids, right what if they are 0:03:00.600 --> 0:03:05.160 young like for I mean, I don't know, it's it's 0:03:05.280 --> 0:03:11.480 it's a hard even thought. But older children, I would 0:03:11.600 --> 0:03:14.080 leave the line of communication open, but I would definitely 0:03:14.120 --> 0:03:17.640 let the parents no, Like, you know, I'm not just 0:03:17.680 --> 0:03:20.560 gonna walk away from this person. I've created this bomb 0:03:20.600 --> 0:03:24.799 with this child, you know, even on walking away from you. So, well, 0:03:24.919 --> 0:03:26.360 you have a daughter. Now, what if you had a 0:03:26.400 --> 0:03:29.400 boyfriend and she would say when she was eight or 0:03:29.440 --> 0:03:32.040 when she was younger, and if you guys broke up, 0:03:32.520 --> 0:03:35.320 would you still let him talk to her, take her 0:03:35.320 --> 0:03:38.440 out by her presence? Yes, so that did have if 0:03:38.480 --> 0:03:40.840 she was if she was attached to him, or if 0:03:40.880 --> 0:03:42.960 they had that kind of relationship already and then me 0:03:42.960 --> 0:03:44.880 and him broke up, I would still allow them to 0:03:44.920 --> 0:03:47.320 have that same relationship because I don't I wouldn't want 0:03:47.320 --> 0:03:49.120 to take him out of her life if she really, 0:03:49.320 --> 0:03:51.400 you know, was attached to him or care for him 0:03:51.400 --> 0:03:55.640 like that. Okay, that's fair enough, all right. Now let's 0:03:55.640 --> 0:03:58.880 get into some questions. If someone you didn't like or 0:03:58.880 --> 0:04:00.960 if it to buy you a press, it would you 0:04:01.000 --> 0:04:05.440 accept it? And it's something you want, like something really nice? 0:04:05.480 --> 0:04:07.120 Like all right, I want to get you this ship 0:04:07.160 --> 0:04:10.200 now bag no strings attached, but you really don't like him, 0:04:10.200 --> 0:04:14.640 metal accept the present? Or do you say no, I 0:04:14.680 --> 0:04:16.039 can't take it because I don't want you to get 0:04:16.040 --> 0:04:19.160 the wrong idea. I would ask you, is that is 0:04:19.200 --> 0:04:21.320 there any criteria? Because normally they'll come with something like 0:04:21.320 --> 0:04:23.039 I'll buy you this if you go on a date 0:04:23.080 --> 0:04:25.360 with me. And if you think that, if you got no, 0:04:25.440 --> 0:04:27.560 I just want to get you something nice because you're beautiful. 0:04:27.600 --> 0:04:33.160 You need a beautiful bag to go with that beautiful face. Ship. 0:04:33.279 --> 0:04:38.800 I might take it. I'm definitely taking it. I like you. 0:04:39.520 --> 0:04:43.400 You're like like I would ask I like, hey, listen 0:04:43.440 --> 0:04:45.520 me too. I would definitely ask all kinds of questions, 0:04:45.520 --> 0:04:46.800 like so I don't have to go on a date 0:04:46.839 --> 0:04:49.480 with you. I don't have to this not alright business? 0:04:49.520 --> 0:04:51.960 But I would take it. And even if he tried 0:04:52.000 --> 0:04:53.760 to go on the day, I would spend his ass 0:04:54.240 --> 0:04:56.560 every time one But what if you got to meet 0:04:56.600 --> 0:04:58.960 him family give it to you? Well that to be 0:04:59.000 --> 0:05:06.080 the only time. Thanks, thanks baby. What if you have 0:05:06.120 --> 0:05:12.040 a boyfriend, and that is different if you're single, ingle, Yeah, 0:05:12.080 --> 0:05:13.560 you have to be single to do that. If you 0:05:13.640 --> 0:05:16.520 have a boyfriend, you can't take it. You can't take 0:05:16.560 --> 0:05:19.560 a gift. You can't take a gift like um like that? 0:05:19.839 --> 0:05:21.360 What did you want to see you in the mail? 0:05:22.000 --> 0:05:24.599 Do you send it back or do you keep it? 0:05:27.440 --> 0:05:30.400 What did he send a return addressed? Though? No, he 0:05:30.480 --> 0:05:32.480 just sends it in the mail. But you have his number. 0:05:32.520 --> 0:05:34.080 You could call him and be like, you know, I 0:05:34.120 --> 0:05:35.840 appreciate it, but I can't take it. Or do you 0:05:35.880 --> 0:05:39.039 just thank you? You know, one time I actually got 0:05:39.040 --> 0:05:41.560 a gift that I couldn't accept and I gave it 0:05:41.600 --> 0:05:45.560 to good Will. Why couldn't you accept it? Because it 0:05:45.640 --> 0:05:49.240 just wasn't appropriate in the situation. Really like it was 0:05:49.279 --> 0:05:51.760 somebody like you know, you could they were offering a 0:05:51.839 --> 0:05:55.680 business relationship, but you could tell it. You know, it'd 0:05:55.680 --> 0:06:00.480 always start. You could just play like you said business. 0:06:00.520 --> 0:06:04.840 I'm thinking this you could, But I gave it a 0:06:04.880 --> 0:06:07.360 good will. It was like this gorgeous like winter jacket. 0:06:08.520 --> 0:06:09.800 You gave it to good You couldn't give it to 0:06:09.800 --> 0:06:12.840 one of your friends at least good Come on, it's 0:06:13.000 --> 0:06:15.840 the same some one of your home girls, my friend. 0:06:16.279 --> 0:06:17.960 Oh this is true, This is true. I could have 0:06:18.000 --> 0:06:19.040 given it to one of friends. I give it a 0:06:19.080 --> 0:06:21.880 good willow. Okay, well, somebody got a nice coat. Somebody 0:06:21.920 --> 0:06:25.200 got a nice gass coat. Now here's another debate that 0:06:25.240 --> 0:06:29.119 I've had. Um, do you make somebody your boyfriend after 0:06:29.200 --> 0:06:32.440 you're in love with them? Or are you making somebody 0:06:32.440 --> 0:06:35.640 your boyfriend and then you fall in love? I have 0:06:35.920 --> 0:06:39.280 made somebody my boyfriend before I fell in love with them. 0:06:39.320 --> 0:06:42.000 But at the same time, I'm starting to think as 0:06:42.040 --> 0:06:44.520 to reference of how old I was when you're young. 0:06:44.600 --> 0:06:48.080 When you're young, you definitely engage in a relationship far 0:06:48.160 --> 0:06:50.440 before you're ever in love. Like it's just a serious 0:06:50.520 --> 0:06:53.280 like like, oh my god, I like that. Yeah, it's 0:06:53.279 --> 0:06:55.520 definitely infatuation. I feel like the older you get, you 0:06:55.600 --> 0:07:01.200 definitely most of my relationships have become official after you 0:07:01.240 --> 0:07:04.040 fall in love when you're older. Yeah, because why I'm 0:07:04.040 --> 0:07:06.160 gonna making my boyfriend if I don't see a future 0:07:06.200 --> 0:07:09.600 with you. Absolutely, especially because we have more of an 0:07:09.640 --> 0:07:13.320 understanding of time and the wasting of time, especially as 0:07:13.320 --> 0:07:15.880 the woman. Once you went to like you, I'm in 0:07:15.920 --> 0:07:17.960 my thirties, I'm ashamed to say it, so once you 0:07:18.080 --> 0:07:21.840 enter your thirties, like, I'm not trying to waste my 0:07:21.960 --> 0:07:26.680 time on any dust, frivel frillleness like Sultan. You know. 0:07:26.880 --> 0:07:30.720 So you say, Gi, have you made people your boyfriend 0:07:30.720 --> 0:07:32.480 before you were in love? Not and forget when you 0:07:32.520 --> 0:07:39.560 were younger as an adult? No, mm hmm um. I 0:07:39.680 --> 0:07:43.559 need that security. I need that that bond. I needed 0:07:43.560 --> 0:07:47.040 to be real before I make it into something right, 0:07:47.160 --> 0:07:51.280 So I would have to. Yeah, I would have to 0:07:51.320 --> 0:07:54.960 hold off on the real relationship until it gets to that, like, 0:07:55.000 --> 0:07:56.480 it has to get to that has to grow to 0:07:56.480 --> 0:08:01.160 that point. You just can't be like, oh, that's my boyfriend. Now, Christian, 0:08:01.200 --> 0:08:03.400 you've been married. What made you decide he was the one? 0:08:03.560 --> 0:08:05.679 When he was the one? When he was the one 0:08:05.880 --> 0:08:08.280 he was, Yeah, because he ain't the one no more. 0:08:09.080 --> 0:08:12.960 But at the time, you know, I'm able to look 0:08:12.960 --> 0:08:15.920 back and remember how I felt. I definitely felt like 0:08:15.960 --> 0:08:19.520 he was an individual that regardless of any of the 0:08:19.600 --> 0:08:23.000 problems that we might encounter, that we could overcome them. 0:08:23.040 --> 0:08:24.800 I felt we had a certain kind of connection, a 0:08:24.840 --> 0:08:28.360 certain kind of bond that you know, lifetime was a 0:08:28.560 --> 0:08:33.280 very logical option, you know, between me and him. That's 0:08:33.280 --> 0:08:37.559 how I felt at the time. Um, but yeah, I 0:08:37.600 --> 0:08:40.120 don't know. I was twenty five at the time that 0:08:40.160 --> 0:08:46.240 I got married, and uh, he was twenty nine. Um. 0:08:46.320 --> 0:08:50.679 The evolution of a person is very different, depending from 0:08:50.760 --> 0:08:52.920 person to person. I thought we were definitely at a 0:08:53.000 --> 0:08:55.880 very settled place, but you know, people still kind of 0:08:55.960 --> 0:08:59.760 end up being different than then they started out being. 0:09:00.040 --> 0:09:05.520 That was what it was in my case. So, M well, 0:09:05.720 --> 0:09:12.000 it's okay, all right, and so so you felt like, Okay, 0:09:12.040 --> 0:09:14.160 we're in love, we should get married. And then when 0:09:14.160 --> 0:09:17.520 did you realize it wasn't gonna work? Um, and I 0:09:17.640 --> 0:09:21.280 realized it wasn't gonna work when ship hit the fan 0:09:22.120 --> 0:09:26.520 and a whole bunch of how would you say? Situations 0:09:26.520 --> 0:09:29.800 that I did not ever imagine we're going on kind 0:09:29.800 --> 0:09:35.640 of presented themselves to reality cheaters. Yeah, oh that sucks. 0:09:36.000 --> 0:09:37.880 How long do you stay? Because we were talking about 0:09:37.920 --> 0:09:40.120 this now, we have a lot of questions that people 0:09:40.160 --> 0:09:42.920 have been hitting the email helped me at gmail dot com. 0:09:42.960 --> 0:09:45.240 But when do you Because I know a lot of 0:09:45.240 --> 0:09:48.040 times we get ourselves situations, a guy cheats on us, 0:09:48.160 --> 0:09:51.120 crazy things happen, and we end up staying. It's true 0:09:51.480 --> 0:09:54.520 for me, I've always said that I can. I don't 0:09:54.520 --> 0:09:57.319 know from TARLT, but I can deal with normal nigga ship. 0:09:57.440 --> 0:10:00.280 Like if you're doing some normal nigga ship, then there's 0:10:00.320 --> 0:10:06.080 a there's a certain allowance like, yes, we're adults, we grow, 0:10:06.200 --> 0:10:09.000 we go through different things. There's periods of time within 0:10:09.040 --> 0:10:12.000 our relationship, especially if you're looking at a lifetime, that 0:10:12.040 --> 0:10:14.760 we might be disconnected, but it is always our goal 0:10:14.800 --> 0:10:18.120 to come back closer. But during those disconnections. I can 0:10:18.200 --> 0:10:21.880 understand how you could possibly confide in somebody else and 0:10:21.960 --> 0:10:25.400 gain an emotional connection and might slip up one or 0:10:25.440 --> 0:10:27.640 two times. But when you just stay parting some extra 0:10:27.679 --> 0:10:30.200 business mineral, I don't it's I have to take it 0:10:30.240 --> 0:10:39.000 a completely different way when you want some extra ship. Uh, 0:10:39.760 --> 0:10:43.400 it just it doesn't. It no longer falls within the 0:10:43.440 --> 0:10:48.200 lines of like I said, yeah, it becomes it becomes 0:10:48.800 --> 0:10:52.640 very disrespectful. And um, so you're saying you could excuse 0:10:52.640 --> 0:10:54.840 a couple of indiscretions when you're all going through your 0:10:54.880 --> 0:10:58.600 ups and downs. Yeah, this is this in modern day 0:10:58.679 --> 0:11:02.320 society with the ax sense that we have, you have 0:11:02.480 --> 0:11:05.960 to allow room for I think on both sides, like 0:11:06.160 --> 0:11:08.120 you never know and like I said, especially with the 0:11:08.720 --> 0:11:12.200 you're now taking in the span of a lifetime, Like yeah, 0:11:12.280 --> 0:11:14.720 talk sixty years, Like I don't know what you're taking. 0:11:14.840 --> 0:11:19.000 My grandparents just celebrated the sixties anniversary. My parents just 0:11:19.000 --> 0:11:22.360 celebrated their thirty first anniversary. Probably here we'll have a 0:11:22.360 --> 0:11:26.880 sixtieth anniversary. That it doesn't exist anymore. It doesn't exist anymore. 0:11:27.200 --> 0:11:29.439 But to me, if you're trying to take in that 0:11:29.520 --> 0:11:32.360 amount of time, there is going to be slip ups. 0:11:32.679 --> 0:11:36.439 It just depends on who you who, who your partner is, 0:11:36.800 --> 0:11:39.600 and how hard you're going to be willing to come 0:11:39.640 --> 0:11:41.720 back around full circle. You think women are weak for 0:11:41.800 --> 0:11:45.320 leaving a man for cheating. We absolutely not, because it 0:11:45.400 --> 0:11:48.040 was a big topic when Tammy said that about Waka, 0:11:48.400 --> 0:11:51.400 she was like, you know that's my husband. We took 0:11:51.400 --> 0:11:54.760 our vows and women who leave are weak, and it 0:11:54.840 --> 0:11:59.280 was a big respect controversy than you, like you said, 0:11:59.360 --> 0:12:01.760 to a certain level, you know, like it goes to 0:12:01.800 --> 0:12:03.720 a certain level. Why don't you cross that line where 0:12:03.720 --> 0:12:07.800 the disrespect is just like lat right and crazy? Then 0:12:07.800 --> 0:12:10.760 it's a rap? What's that line? Like, what are some 0:12:10.800 --> 0:12:12.760 things that's crossing that line? Don't get me to run 0:12:12.760 --> 0:12:16.080 it down the list. Not in my house right, not 0:12:16.240 --> 0:12:21.440 in our house? And then I'm not with the friends, 0:12:21.559 --> 0:12:25.720 not people that you know, like probably like I know, 0:12:26.240 --> 0:12:30.000 like there's there, there's definitely don't be messy. Don't mean 0:12:30.000 --> 0:12:33.600 nobody's kids getting caught. Can you imagine, don't don't be 0:12:33.640 --> 0:12:36.720 meeting the kids, don't be I don't know, don't yet, 0:12:37.960 --> 0:12:41.000 don't get caught, don't but don't don't have me out 0:12:41.000 --> 0:12:44.440 here looking crazy, like if you're gonna do something, do 0:12:44.520 --> 0:12:47.760 it on on the slide like you're intelligent. I like 0:12:48.080 --> 0:12:51.320 very intelligent men like that is what draws me in. 0:12:51.559 --> 0:12:54.840 So because I now you are of a certain intellectual 0:12:54.880 --> 0:13:00.400 capacity and you want some bullshit like right, you're smart. 0:13:00.679 --> 0:13:03.600 You don't have you don't have an excuse? Yeah, you 0:13:03.640 --> 0:13:06.280 know what I mean? What if it's just a fetish thing, 0:13:06.320 --> 0:13:08.360 like there's something that you won't do and this chick 0:13:08.440 --> 0:13:11.640 will do it, and it's something like that's normally good ship, 0:13:11.760 --> 0:13:13.720 Like if I ain't gonna do it, that I can you. 0:13:13.720 --> 0:13:16.720 You have to equate as a human being. Logically, if 0:13:16.840 --> 0:13:23.600 I am not sufficing your vice, you are inevitable with 0:13:23.600 --> 0:13:26.160 this strap on. And and then you find me like 0:13:26.240 --> 0:13:29.760 baby hired somebody else to do? What if he hires 0:13:29.760 --> 0:13:34.280 someone would that bother? You know, if we had that 0:13:34.320 --> 0:13:36.200 kind of relationship, you didn't know because he's a shame, 0:13:36.240 --> 0:13:37.880 he's embarrassed. He doesn't want to tell you he's paying 0:13:37.880 --> 0:13:41.320 for pussy. He ain't paying for pussy, paying for dick, 0:13:42.120 --> 0:13:45.120 all right, forget the strap on. Okay, I just say 0:13:45.480 --> 0:13:49.200 he hires somebody and you know he just pays for it, 0:13:49.240 --> 0:13:52.480 and that's it is that worse than having an emotional connection. 0:13:52.480 --> 0:13:54.840 I'm going to say it lacks the most emotional connections, 0:13:54.880 --> 0:13:56.760 So it's a little bit different. I would just be 0:13:56.760 --> 0:13:58.679 a little bit more concerned about his mental health and 0:13:58.720 --> 0:14:00.480 be like, maybe do we need to go to maryor counseling, 0:14:00.600 --> 0:14:03.560 Like what's happening, what's really happening? You know, I'll be 0:14:03.600 --> 0:14:10.360 more thinking about the underlying what you call it. Like first, girls, 0:14:10.440 --> 0:14:12.400 some men just want to be tricks. You can't help. 0:14:12.800 --> 0:14:14.839 They can't help you. They can't help Some men just 0:14:14.880 --> 0:14:16.720 want to be tricks. They just want to trill. In 0:14:16.760 --> 0:14:22.320 that case, now you're Jamaican, so tell us the truth 0:14:22.320 --> 0:14:29.440 about these Jamaican men because it was all this controversy 0:14:29.760 --> 0:14:32.800 Jamaican ze pussy, right. It depends on the one. I 0:14:32.880 --> 0:14:37.080 know some that are very they stick to their guns. 0:14:37.680 --> 0:14:39.920 But then at the same time, you know who I've 0:14:39.960 --> 0:14:49.360 been in those relationships and I would not in Jamaica 0:14:49.400 --> 0:14:52.120 we say bow. So for me, I have been in 0:14:52.240 --> 0:14:55.480 a relationship where there was no oral sex. Girl, I 0:14:55.520 --> 0:14:57.400 don't know if I can do that because I'm like, yo, 0:14:57.400 --> 0:14:58.640 if you're not gonna give it to me, then I'm 0:14:58.640 --> 0:15:01.520 not gonna give it to you. He didn't complain, because 0:15:01.520 --> 0:15:03.360 how can you complain if you're not going to give 0:15:03.360 --> 0:15:05.280 it to me? That's amazing when you should do that. 0:15:05.520 --> 0:15:08.520 Oral sex needs to be reciprocated or not done at all, 0:15:08.680 --> 0:15:10.760 not or not done at all. But Jamaican man, you 0:15:10.840 --> 0:15:15.240 have had a Jamaican man. They were Americanized though, but 0:15:15.720 --> 0:15:19.480 straight No, Nope, because sometimes they might do it and 0:15:19.520 --> 0:15:22.680 I tell nobody to if it's between them and troll. 0:15:22.800 --> 0:15:25.600 But I haven't had that straight yad like that talks 0:15:25.640 --> 0:15:27.800 like that. They would kill you if you tell anyone. 0:15:28.880 --> 0:15:30.800 But some that have been Americanized, like they've lived in 0:15:30.840 --> 0:15:34.440 America for a number of years. Why rule that should be? Like, 0:15:34.520 --> 0:15:36.320 come on, what is it? I think it's ridiculous. Why 0:15:36.360 --> 0:15:37.680 is it that they don't like? What is it? Why 0:15:37.680 --> 0:15:43.600 does it make it? Yeah, they call it like manabo bowing, 0:15:44.120 --> 0:15:47.720 Like that's essentially a form of worship in a sense. 0:15:48.160 --> 0:15:51.280 So if you all want to look upon like Rastafarianism, 0:15:51.440 --> 0:15:55.160 you should not bow to anybody other than God. So 0:15:55.280 --> 0:15:57.120 like you can take it back to so many roots, 0:15:57.160 --> 0:16:02.040 like it could be associated with religion of bowing like you, 0:16:02.200 --> 0:16:09.360 It's it's interesting where they get there basically, But yeah, 0:16:09.360 --> 0:16:11.560 they just you know, to me, I could I was 0:16:11.600 --> 0:16:13.000 in a relationship to and I'm like, yo, if we 0:16:13.040 --> 0:16:14.880 get married, like you got to make an exception to 0:16:14.920 --> 0:16:17.400 this ship. You can't go out of each other. Yeah, 0:16:17.640 --> 0:16:20.240 like I am now you're you're my king and I'm queen. 0:16:20.520 --> 0:16:25.560 Like a touchy subject, man. I really like it, really, 0:16:25.720 --> 0:16:28.160 especially with Jamaican's Oh my god, we got Sean Paulin 0:16:28.200 --> 0:16:31.680 is so much trouble really breakfast Club because he said 0:16:31.720 --> 0:16:33.800 he did it and then he tried to take it back. 0:16:34.040 --> 0:16:38.120 It was too late. He's he's he's a world traveler. 0:16:38.320 --> 0:16:41.400 He should have had his mind expanded by now. And 0:16:41.480 --> 0:16:44.760 he's married. Yeah, and he's married absolutely, all right. Now. 0:16:44.800 --> 0:16:47.480 We were also talking about Candy Burrows from Real Housebands 0:16:47.480 --> 0:16:50.640 of Atlanta, and recently there was this whole big controversy 0:16:50.720 --> 0:16:55.560 about her daughter Riley, and did you see this and 0:16:55.600 --> 0:16:58.880 the mom, the baby's mom, saying, well the daughters the 0:16:58.960 --> 0:17:02.160 daughter's mother waiting now the wife, the wife of the 0:17:02.240 --> 0:17:05.280 baby daddy, saying that Candy was aside, she was a 0:17:05.280 --> 0:17:07.679 side chick. And why would you expect your daughter to 0:17:07.720 --> 0:17:09.720 be taken care of like that? If you decide chick? 0:17:10.359 --> 0:17:15.199 Now let's just say you had a man, you were married, 0:17:15.320 --> 0:17:18.119 and he got the side chick pregnant. How do you 0:17:18.160 --> 0:17:24.160 treat that child? The child is never at fault as 0:17:24.200 --> 0:17:27.480 a woman. Child is never at fault you are. If 0:17:27.560 --> 0:17:30.080 you are a mother yourself or an auntie or whatever, 0:17:30.640 --> 0:17:33.920 you understand, the child entering the world is of complete innocence. 0:17:33.960 --> 0:17:36.720 They didn't ask to be there. They didn't tell them 0:17:36.760 --> 0:17:40.560 to carry bout their adult business. So at the end 0:17:40.600 --> 0:17:45.000 of the day, UM, I am definitely the type that 0:17:45.600 --> 0:17:48.359 I would say, you know, you need to take care 0:17:48.400 --> 0:17:51.280 of your pickney, right, needs to keep care of your seed. 0:17:51.440 --> 0:17:54.359 And are you right there taking care of the baby too? Um? 0:17:54.400 --> 0:17:56.000 I don't know if I'm right there taking care of 0:17:56.040 --> 0:17:57.919 the baby. But does the baby got to come to 0:17:57.920 --> 0:18:03.080 the house. I don't have to. I mean, that's that's sticky, 0:18:03.160 --> 0:18:07.240 that's that's touchy, that's super touchy. But I have heard 0:18:07.280 --> 0:18:10.840 of instances where there are some women in that kind 0:18:10.840 --> 0:18:13.639 of situation that you know, they have gotten along and 0:18:13.680 --> 0:18:17.440 they've created a loving environment for this for the sake 0:18:17.480 --> 0:18:20.399 of for the sake of the child. So on a 0:18:20.440 --> 0:18:25.679 personal level, I am that child. My father was married, 0:18:26.400 --> 0:18:29.880 my mother was one of many side bitches, and he 0:18:30.000 --> 0:18:35.240 had me and my sister Nicki sixteen days apart. Neither 0:18:35.280 --> 0:18:39.760 one of us were by his wife, so and we 0:18:39.760 --> 0:18:44.359 were all raised one big, happy family. Now, our mothers 0:18:44.359 --> 0:18:47.400 didn't always get along when we were younger. They get 0:18:47.400 --> 0:18:49.879 along now, but when we were younger, they were always 0:18:49.920 --> 0:18:52.919 at war. But my father kept his children together. My 0:18:53.000 --> 0:18:55.280 father made sure all his children knew each other. We 0:18:55.280 --> 0:18:58.080 were all at you know, Christmas in my grandma's house 0:18:58.119 --> 0:19:00.800 and at the beach house and Wildwood every summer together, 0:19:00.840 --> 0:19:02.840 you know, like we were all the moms. Were the 0:19:02.880 --> 0:19:05.280 other moms nice to you? Like? Did they treat you well? 0:19:05.400 --> 0:19:10.120 Or were they a little whoa the one the one 0:19:10.160 --> 0:19:12.560 who had the daughter that sixteen days apart from me, 0:19:12.760 --> 0:19:14.720 she was the one who was bitter and she wasn't 0:19:14.720 --> 0:19:16.960 mean to me. But she wasn't the one that was 0:19:17.040 --> 0:19:19.680 like happy, go lucky family time. You know. She kind 0:19:19.680 --> 0:19:22.920 of kept her distance. My mother and his wife over 0:19:22.960 --> 0:19:26.680 the years created an amazing bond to this day, they 0:19:26.720 --> 0:19:30.240 still have that amazing bond. Oh, I'm glad you hear. 0:19:30.280 --> 0:19:37.000 Stephanie was very strong about this topic. We were talking 0:19:37.000 --> 0:19:41.480 about the side check with the baby baby like it's 0:19:41.520 --> 0:19:45.560 your own if you stay with the man. So anyway, 0:19:45.920 --> 0:19:49.080 I became you know, I was that baby. But I 0:19:49.320 --> 0:19:53.200 um have an amazing relationship with my stepmother, who they're 0:19:53.200 --> 0:19:55.520 still married, even that they're not together. Have an amazing 0:19:55.600 --> 0:19:58.040 relationship with her, like I love her as if she's 0:19:58.040 --> 0:20:00.240 my mom. I call her mom. She's really my other other. 0:20:00.640 --> 0:20:03.880 Just a few months ago, my brother's I'm sorry, my 0:20:03.920 --> 0:20:06.560 father's brother, my uncle passed away, I said at his 0:20:06.640 --> 0:20:09.080 general with both of our other inside of me, and 0:20:09.080 --> 0:20:11.360 that was an amazing feeling to have both of them 0:20:11.359 --> 0:20:13.280 with me at that time. It's amazing that women can 0:20:13.280 --> 0:20:14.760 do that. I feel like men can't handle it, and 0:20:14.840 --> 0:20:17.000 men can't handle that. That's a woman thing, like just 0:20:17.119 --> 0:20:20.320 because we understand the importance of nurturing and that the 0:20:20.400 --> 0:20:24.480 child is not it's not that fault. Yeah, yeah, that's 0:20:24.520 --> 0:20:27.680 amazing though, Steph, what's your take on it? Your man 0:20:27.840 --> 0:20:30.840 has a baby by somebody else, you stay with him, 0:20:31.000 --> 0:20:34.560 What happens with that child in your house? I mean, 0:20:34.680 --> 0:20:38.159 it depends. I don't think that it's during our relationship. 0:20:38.280 --> 0:20:39.920 I don't I'm not going to deal with the child. 0:20:39.960 --> 0:20:42.159 I don't have anything to do with that child. I 0:20:42.200 --> 0:20:44.480 think you should take care of the child and join 0:20:45.080 --> 0:20:48.119 and on, you know, the things, the milestones of raising 0:20:48.119 --> 0:20:51.200 a child, you know what I mean. But that's that's 0:20:51.280 --> 0:20:54.760 your business. You you played yourself like take care of it. 0:20:55.359 --> 0:20:57.240 To do that is not a part of my family. 0:20:57.800 --> 0:21:02.080 So what if you can can that kid? Then you 0:21:02.119 --> 0:21:06.840 know your son, your son together, well you have it again? Well, 0:21:07.000 --> 0:21:11.080 I um, I think yeah, I think that I think 0:21:11.119 --> 0:21:12.879 you should let the kids know each other. You know, 0:21:12.960 --> 0:21:15.439 I think if I have a lot of brothers and 0:21:15.480 --> 0:21:18.879 sisters that I didn't get to know until my adult years, 0:21:19.040 --> 0:21:20.399 you know what I mean, And I think that was 0:21:20.440 --> 0:21:23.200 foul of my parents, you know. So I think that 0:21:23.400 --> 0:21:25.960 the kids should be involved in each other's lives. But 0:21:26.000 --> 0:21:27.719 I don't see why I would have to be involved 0:21:27.720 --> 0:21:29.360 in that. But because your kid is there too, don't 0:21:29.359 --> 0:21:30.959 you want to know this child that's hanging around your 0:21:31.000 --> 0:21:32.959 kids and they can. I have to come over your 0:21:32.960 --> 0:21:35.159 house sometimes if you live with this man and the 0:21:35.240 --> 0:21:37.240 kid went to sleep over, I mean I could take 0:21:37.280 --> 0:21:39.720 the kids before me. I could take the kids before me, 0:21:39.800 --> 0:21:42.399