Speaker 1: Welcome to We Talk Back Podcast, the production of iHeartRadio
Speaker 1: and the Black Effect Network.
Speaker 2: So we're just two unapologetically black women with an opinion
Speaker 2: to talk.
Speaker 1: What would have we talked Back? Where we encourage you
Speaker 1: to hustle hard, laugh, ladder, and always keep it cute.
Speaker 1: So grab your coffee, cocktail and crown because it's about
Speaker 1: to go down. What's up, y'all, it's your girl a
Speaker 1: j holiday. What's up?
Speaker 2: Tam bam, yew hey girl, Hey y'all. I missed y'all.
Speaker 2: I'm missed you.
Speaker 1: Yelling bitch, I missed you too.
Speaker 2: Well, Damn, you're brobing me. My ex boyfriend when I
Speaker 2: was happy, he used to be like, stop being so happy.
Speaker 2: How was your weekend? Girl?
Speaker 1: We recovering from the fucking uh fig snowstorm we had
Speaker 1: last week. I ain't do shit. I literally was in
Speaker 1: the house from Tuesday morning.
Speaker 2: Now I leave.
Speaker 1: I didn't leave the house at some point on Tuesday,
Speaker 1: but I was in the house. No, I did not.
Speaker 1: I was in the house from Monday to Sunday. Damn
Speaker 1: the whole week, hermit the whole week. So it did
Speaker 1: snow real bad on Tuesday, but I was sitting in
Speaker 1: the fucking house waiting on FedEx bitch ass. Shout at
Speaker 1: the FedEx bitch ass for several days, waiting on breaks
Speaker 1: from my car in my new laptop.
Speaker 2: Damn. So when she says the snowstorm we probably had
Speaker 2: like an inch, No, it.
Speaker 1: Was heavy though, BJ actually flipped to his car. He
Speaker 1: yeh yes girl. Tuesday night, on the way on, I
Speaker 1: called him. I was like, we need a paper towel
Speaker 1: because we about to be in the house for a
Speaker 1: couple of days or whatever. We weren't on on paper towels.
Speaker 1: So some kept telling me, like, call that nigga because
Speaker 1: he taken too long, So I called him. He answered
Speaker 1: the phone maybe about ten fifteen minutes later. He called
Speaker 1: me back and he's running like out of breath. Somebody
Speaker 1: just ran me off the road. I'm running to the
Speaker 1: Chick fil a. I'm like, what, you know what like
Speaker 1: an emergency happens, like you cannot get yourself together quick
Speaker 1: enough because I'm in the house. I don't took a shower,
Speaker 1: I'll got a clothes on. It's ten o'clock. Why I
Speaker 1: care about this?
Speaker 2: Where am I? I've talked to you several times and
Speaker 2: nowhere have you seen I'm gonna tell you why, because
Speaker 2: a near death experience.
Speaker 1: Because this nigga act like nothing happened, Like I didn't
Speaker 1: understand the severity of it until I saw the car
Speaker 1: because of how he was acting after the facts. Now
Speaker 1: that in the moment of right you while' on the phone,
Speaker 1: I'm like grabbing my pistol. I'm like, did somebody did
Speaker 1: somebody run him off the road?
Speaker 2: Right like?
Speaker 1: So now I'm got the car loaded up, but I
Speaker 1: gotta get outside. It's real snow because the car is
Speaker 1: covered with ice snow. So luckily I done lived in
Speaker 1: the areas like this, so in my trunk because I
Speaker 1: ain't really a girl, I got like the scraper, a
Speaker 1: little brush thing like for snow. So I gotta let
Speaker 1: the car warm up. All is just my life is
Speaker 1: in slow motion, bitch, trying to get that. And then
Speaker 1: now I got to drive through roads that really has snow.
Speaker 1: There's no car so like the snow is thick on
Speaker 1: the highway, sliding like so now I'm it takes me
Speaker 1: twenty minutes to get five miles on the highway. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so he found he wouldn't answer the phone on the phone,
Speaker 1: going to voicemail bitch. I'm like, y're you panikin What
Speaker 1: the fuck is happening?
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 1: So he finally calls you back and he's calm. He's like, yeah,
Speaker 1: I'm with the police. I'm at the home depot now though,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, okay, I'm having a drive real slow.
Speaker 1: So now he's calm, more calm, So I get there.
Speaker 1: He outside with the police, get the little ticket right up. Whatever.
Speaker 1: So somebody pulled in front of him and he had
Speaker 1: to slap like, why are you even abruptly pulling in
Speaker 1: front of people on icy highway?
Speaker 2: Icy? In there to face These motherfuckers don't know nothing
Speaker 2: about snow and ice. They don't know how to drive.
Speaker 1: Ever, it's nothing to play with. Okay, black ice, for
Speaker 1: sure ain't nothing to play with because the inner state
Speaker 1: seems like it doesn't get as much snow on it,
Speaker 1: but there's always black ice.
Speaker 2: Right because they riding over it and the water freezes
Speaker 2: on the ground and it just looks dark.
Speaker 1: Yeah. So the person like came in front of him
Speaker 1: and then he had to slam on brakes, which then
Speaker 1: caused him to like the car flipped two times down
Speaker 1: into the embankment on the on the side of the highway,
Speaker 1: tree came through the fucking windshield. All at this nigga,
Speaker 1: don't have a scratch on him?
Speaker 2: God covering him flip two times? I'm girl, why he
Speaker 2: was exaggerating this?
Speaker 1: He in here acting like it didn't happen. Like I'm
Speaker 1: hearing him on the phone telling people, act like you
Speaker 1: almost died, my nigga, did you get your back?
Speaker 2: Don't hurt? Why? That's why?
Speaker 1: Then we have sex after that accident.
Speaker 2: Ain't nothing gonna get that man some here and nothing will.
Speaker 1: You?
Speaker 2: Ain't flip over all, Valentine, do.
Speaker 1: You want to have sex that night? I think we
Speaker 1: had sex that night. I'm sorry, baby, I'm trying to
Speaker 1: do bad. I just don't listen. I got more shit
Speaker 1: on my mind. That's why this episode of the day
Speaker 1: is gonna be great anyway. But but yeah, when he
Speaker 1: finally got to the car a couple of days later, the.
Speaker 2: Fucking ruth in, yes, Lord, have mercy, and I'm like,
Speaker 2: get my ladder.
Speaker 1: I had a ladder in the back of Like, did
Speaker 1: you get my ladder out that damn truck?
Speaker 2: He should have been like, did you suck my dick? Okay,
Speaker 2: your ladder?
Speaker 1: Get my fucking ladders is not cheating. Get my ladder,
Speaker 1: okay anywhere?
Speaker 2: Yo?
Speaker 1: Yeah, that do got into a car accident.
Speaker 2: Well I'm glad he's okay, me too, cover him, amen, we're.
Speaker 1: Like, man, that Jones was in there. Man, I'm good though,
Speaker 1: Like what are you well? Your back don't hurt nothing right?
Speaker 1: Stuff like that be like low wake up morning calls.
Speaker 1: But I don't know if he'd be taking heed for real.
Speaker 2: Well, I'm just glad he okay, because that could have
Speaker 2: been much worse, you know.
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, Like in my mind, like somebody ran him
Speaker 1: off the highway, bitch, and now I got to go
Speaker 1: get in the shootout looking for a car somewhere.
Speaker 2: Yeah, in my mind, but you ready locked and loaded
Speaker 2: in mind like oh.
Speaker 1: I'm not trying to kill him, and like he's running
Speaker 1: down the interstate to get off the highway to get
Speaker 1: to Chick fil at home depot. Like that ship is
Speaker 1: wild to me?
Speaker 2: All right, listen, Yo, that was eventful. My story. I
Speaker 2: went to that concert and went to the Baby concept.
Speaker 2: Baby had the first birthday bash in Atlanta, I hear,
Speaker 2: I mean in Charlotte.
Speaker 1: Oh the baby okay, yeah, not little By Nice And it.
Speaker 2: Was a lot of artists, big Extra Plug two see
Speaker 2: fifty cents, Sexy Red, all the people and other names
Speaker 2: amongst other names that I'm too old to know who
Speaker 2: they are, and I don't know. It wasn't for me.
Speaker 2: You didn't enjoy it, Hm, it was okay. I think
Speaker 2: the thing for me was because it's a lot of
Speaker 2: great artists. But it's just like the intermissions between artists
Speaker 2: was just too long, so it was a lot of
Speaker 2: empty space. I'll say that, a lot of empty space.
Speaker 1: Niggas probably was late, yeah, niggass late yeah.
Speaker 2: Probably back in that back smoking and drinking. It's like,
Speaker 2: oh shit, I'm supposed to be one Like, I don't
Speaker 2: know what was going on, but I mean it was
Speaker 2: the first one. Maybe the second one will be better.
Speaker 2: I did that and then I went to a little mixer.
Speaker 2: I popped out with red hair. Niggas feeling the red hair.
Speaker 1: I puk Your hair was fabulous, bitch, okay, thank you,
Speaker 1: thank you.
Speaker 2: And I see somebody in the gym yesterday. They was like,
Speaker 2: I thought your hair was red. I was like, bitch,
Speaker 2: that is not gym hair. That is exactly I'm tied hair.
Speaker 2: You need to know the difference this pony ponytail I
Speaker 2: got on. This is my gym hair, and that's my
Speaker 2: going out here cat wag.
Speaker 1: I got on.
Speaker 2: But baby, that ponytail almost fell off in the gym.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna have to find something else to do with
Speaker 2: my hair. In that gym. I went to pull my
Speaker 2: hoodie over to like go leave, and I felt that
Speaker 2: motherfucker slide and I was like, oh my god, I
Speaker 2: ain't even put my jacket all the way on. I
Speaker 2: just walked out with it's sitting on top of my
Speaker 2: head because I was scared my ponytail was gonna hit
Speaker 2: the floor and embarrass me.
Speaker 1: Shit, bitch, I went to spind yesterday for the first
Speaker 1: time in a year. When I tell you, I was
Speaker 1: sweating so bad my eyelashes came off in that.
Speaker 2: Bitch, that's a good burn. I'm ready to go back.
Speaker 2: But that's just shits so expensive. And the class pass,
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, do you pay? So you pay for a
Speaker 2: monthly class pass? Did you? I did? I did the.
Speaker 1: Trial right now, right, but I think I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: ahead and pay for it because I don't know if
Speaker 1: y'all know. But with class pass, you could go to gyms, yoga, studios,
Speaker 1: hair salons, naro salons. It just like depending on how
Speaker 1: many credits you got to use for each of the things, right,
Speaker 1: but can get a lot done for sixty dollars a month.
Speaker 1: That's like the smallest plan.
Speaker 2: I think it goes on how many how many times
Speaker 2: you know, like how many classes.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. So like if you want to
Speaker 1: go to so I went to Old two Fitness, it
Speaker 1: only allowed me to go one time because it's a trial.
Speaker 1: But if you got the actual membership, like the class only,
Speaker 1: I mean the if you want to go to the gym,
Speaker 1: it's only one credit. So like if you gots how
Speaker 1: meredits you go, you don't get that many credits a week.
Speaker 1: It's twenty eight a month for the smallest plan.
Speaker 2: Yeah, oh that's not bad. Yeah, well I'm gonna check
Speaker 2: on that because yeah, an actual membership t SPIND is high.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so then you like last night I went to
Speaker 1: the works SIND class. So the one I chose because
Speaker 1: of the time of days, probably like a busy one.
Speaker 1: It was six point six credits though, but they had
Speaker 1: like two credits.
Speaker 2: It's not one credit per yeah.
Speaker 1: No, not the regular gym is like one credit, one
Speaker 1: to two credits. But like the classes is like we.
Speaker 2: See that spin class. When I like really got into it,
Speaker 2: I was doing like four or five times a week,
Speaker 2: I would run out of my past. Yeah yeah, but
Speaker 2: let me tell you. I had a dream last night
Speaker 2: and I remember it and I want to share it,
Speaker 2: and you tell me what it means. And y'all DM
Speaker 2: me what it means. If you know, I had a
Speaker 2: dream that I could open my legs and pearls were
Speaker 2: falling out, like real pearls.
Speaker 1: I mean, you did say your cuci looked like Oyster,
Speaker 1: didn't you?
Speaker 2: No, b And first of all, all couchies look like
Speaker 2: oyster the sel form or fashion. But pearls like all right,
Speaker 2: so not like out of my pucci like but like
Speaker 2: literally out of the my legs, like the skin on
Speaker 2: my legs could open up and pearls would come out.
Speaker 2: Like it was like almost like a like a ZiT
Speaker 2: like a zip was like.
Speaker 1: You busted in, a pearl came out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, pearls would come out.
Speaker 1: I mean, that doesn't sound like a bad thing to me.
Speaker 1: I don't know what that sounded like creation to me,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Like creating something something good,
Speaker 1: because who doesn't like pearls? Girls?
Speaker 2: That's so weird though, right.
Speaker 1: It is little oyster, no mermaid.
Speaker 2: Like, and dozens of pearls was just shooting out of
Speaker 2: my leg.
Speaker 1: What else like happened that? That was it.
Speaker 2: That's the only part I remember. Was like it would
Speaker 2: be like almost open flesh on my legs and I
Speaker 2: was just like squeezing the pearls out. Wasn't puss, No,
Speaker 2: it was actual pearls. Bitch, it's pearls. They were. And
Speaker 2: I remember me, I can't remember who this was with me,
Speaker 2: but we were picking up the pearls. We were picking
Speaker 2: up the pearls, picking up the pearls, picking up the pearls,
Speaker 2: and it was just coming out of my leg. Hm,
Speaker 2: you know, I'm bizarre. I gotta stop. I did. I
Speaker 2: did eat a CBD edible before I went.
Speaker 1: I don't know that. I mean, that doesn't sound like
Speaker 1: a bad dream to me, though.
Speaker 2: It wasn't a bad dream. It just was weird, very
Speaker 2: vivid and weird, that part of it.
Speaker 1: But yeah, so I look it up.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna have to y'all google in and tell
Speaker 2: me what it means. Let's get in the sins, Yeah, man,
Speaker 2: what's that?
Speaker 1: What's going on? This week? Last week, couple of days ago?
Speaker 1: Ship we just ain't talk about yet. Uh we are
Speaker 1: we going to start with this weirdo DJ academics. You know,
Speaker 1: did y'all see the ship with DJ Academics. His response
Speaker 1: to what happened is just weird. So, first of all,
Speaker 1: DJ Academics, they're saying he's exposed for grooming a fifteen
Speaker 1: year old minor, because even the child said, hey, this
Speaker 1: is grooming. The child had to tell these grown men, hey,
Speaker 1: I feel like y'all grooming me.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: So the first video, which surfaced on x formerly Twitter,
Speaker 1: shows an unnamed individual speaking to nor GXD, I don't
Speaker 1: know all these streamers, the fifteen year old streamer. During
Speaker 1: a conversation on discord. The individual made an unsettling remark asking,
Speaker 1: oh yeah, because like you, nobody had pictures up, but
Speaker 1: you know DJ academics voice all day long. The little
Speaker 1: boy had his video had his picture up like his
Speaker 1: video running. Academics video wasn't running, but we know his voice,
Speaker 1: and I don't know who these other individuals on the
Speaker 1: discord was. Somebody says, yo, Nor what's your address? That's
Speaker 1: the little boy his name is nor GXD. He said,
Speaker 1: I'm going to send some strippers over there. When nor
Speaker 1: GXD responded that he was fifteen and uncomfortable with the suggestion,
Speaker 1: a person appeared to dismiss his concerns, saying so because
Speaker 1: he was like, man, you're gonna put them on the case.
Speaker 1: The little boy saying you're trying to put me on
Speaker 1: the case. Right, He's like, slow down, like he's so intelligent,
Speaker 1: this little boy, Like wait, slow down, Like what the
Speaker 1: fuck is wrong with y'all? So the interaction raised alarms
Speaker 1: about the nature of the conversation and the apparent disregard
Speaker 1: for the miners discomfort. After the clip from the same
Speaker 1: day feature DJ Academics engaging with nor XGXD during a
Speaker 1: Fortnite live stream and the thirty second video, Academics made
Speaker 1: a series of sexually explicit comments. At one point, he asked, yo,
Speaker 1: if Max said he wants to try fucking a dude,
Speaker 1: will you let him fuck you? This is not just
Speaker 1: a dude, this is a child dude. Awesome, right, and
Speaker 1: even this conversation wouldn't even be appropriate to be having
Speaker 1: with another heterosexual grown man, Like what are y'all talking.
Speaker 2: About they're supposed to be playing video games, Like what
Speaker 2: is it? Why is this even a conversation over a
Speaker 2: video game? It just seems so very that video game
Speaker 2: world be like this though predatorial, yes.
Speaker 1: It'd be like this. People be showing up at children's houses.
Speaker 1: You know. That's a one video where a grown man
Speaker 1: showed up at this lady house because the little girl
Speaker 1: was trying to link him with her mom, Like what.
Speaker 2: And so he went off the childs He actually pulled
Speaker 2: up today to the house to me hit the mama. Yes,
Speaker 2: people are nuts, and that's why you just got to
Speaker 2: monitor what your kids are doing on these games, because
Speaker 2: they're talking to people like offering you know, gay sex
Speaker 2: to your fifteen year old son is crazy, you know.
Speaker 1: And his response to it, he was like, first he
Speaker 1: was like yelling all crazy, like anybody calling me a weirdo,
Speaker 1: I don't need nobody, and da da da. The child
Speaker 1: himself called y'all weirdos first of all, prior to anybody
Speaker 1: else getting a hold of what you was doing and
Speaker 1: putting out their commentary about it, calling you a fucking weirdo.
Speaker 1: The kid in the moment called your ass a fucking
Speaker 1: weirdo because you were being weird?
Speaker 2: Yeah, what was like?
Speaker 1: I just I won DJ Academics off the internet at
Speaker 1: this point because he has had so many situations. And listen,
Speaker 1: you know a lot of people will say, like everybody
Speaker 1: deserves a voice. I don't feel that way. I think
Speaker 1: the internet podcast the world amplifies every You can amplify
Speaker 1: anybody's voice, and some people do not deserve to have
Speaker 1: a voice because they misuse it. And he's one of
Speaker 1: those people. He sits in his fucking house in the
Speaker 1: basement looking stupid, going on these rants online. He's never
Speaker 1: been like in the news for anything.
Speaker 2: Or anything good. That's what I was about to say.
Speaker 2: I don't hear a lot of good things. When I
Speaker 2: hear about him is always something like mean against women
Speaker 2: or now telling a child some grown man wants to
Speaker 2: fuck a man? Can he come to your house? That's
Speaker 2: just like next.
Speaker 1: Strippers over there, Like what y'all talking about?
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's it's real gross.
Speaker 1: So and wait till this little boy's parents, you know,
Speaker 1: decide to want to sue academic because they can make
Speaker 1: up the show like, oh he's having like I mean,
Speaker 1: he might be because he's on the internet. Too. This
Speaker 1: is a video of him online having to defend himself
Speaker 1: against these predators and that could cause emotional distress. And
Speaker 1: I feel like the parents to take take academics for
Speaker 1: all the fuck he has.
Speaker 2: Right, And I don't think he realizes how serious this is, Like,
Speaker 2: that's serious what you were saying to that child?
Speaker 1: He said he misspoke basically and miss not so much
Speaker 1: of apology once he called down, it still was an apology.
Speaker 1: He wasn't taking no accountability and he was talking about
Speaker 1: the next person instead of focusing on what he had
Speaker 1: he did wrong.
Speaker 2: He doesn't get it, child, And we're in like subconsciously,
Speaker 2: where is that come from? For you? Is there? Do
Speaker 2: you want to fuck kids? Like?
Speaker 1: Well, he was already in the headlines about, you know,
Speaker 1: fucking on a fifteen year old girl.
Speaker 2: So this is hard for you know what. I just
Speaker 2: pray over everybody, child, because it is some real life
Speaker 2: predators out here and they are amongst us, okay goodness.
Speaker 1: And they need to be ostracized. So I don't I
Speaker 1: can't remember the other streamer who called him out. I
Speaker 1: think it was Max, the guy Max called him out.
Speaker 1: That's the video that kind of went viral. Who called
Speaker 1: DJ Academics out about it, and that's that's what needs
Speaker 1: to happen.
Speaker 2: More.
Speaker 1: Men need to step in when niggas is being weird,
Speaker 1: Those like y'all just be letting men do nasty.
Speaker 2: That's a wrong man. That was always the excuse I
Speaker 2: would hear when I'd be like, why you don't why
Speaker 2: you hang with him? Why are you talking to him?
Speaker 2: That's grown as men? I can't.
Speaker 1: And your friends are aspect of you, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying? Like you, you build relationships based on you first, right,
Speaker 1: so you see a little bit of you and this
Speaker 1: person why you were even able to become friends with them?
Speaker 2: Right?
Speaker 1: So is that an aspect of you? Is DJ Academics
Speaker 1: an aspect of you that you just haven't explored for
Speaker 1: real yet?
Speaker 2: Right? Yeap?
Speaker 1: Where to ask niggas anyway?
Speaker 2: So what about this shit I keep saying about my
Speaker 2: favorite president, Barack Obama and Jennifer Aniston have an affair.
Speaker 1: I don't know where that shit came from, but it
Speaker 1: seemed like it started like last year sometimes because she
Speaker 1: was on Jimmy Kimball and she basically, like, you know,
Speaker 1: try to she tried to ignore it, I guess, and
Speaker 1: then she finally said something about it last year sometime,
Speaker 1: but it's ongoing. And then now because Michelle Obama didn't
Speaker 1: show up at Jimmy Carter's funeral, nor did she up
Speaker 1: at the inauguration, they're saying that.
Speaker 2: There's truth to it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a divorce, right, and people amongst the circles
Speaker 1: of people in the Capitol right say that this might
Speaker 1: be a thing.
Speaker 2: I don't believe it, not my baroque.
Speaker 1: Did you watch the movie that Michelle Obama and Barack's
Speaker 1: production company created, Leave the World Behind? Did you watch it?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: I did remember the little girl in a movie like
Speaker 1: she was wanted to watch Friends. That's like all she
Speaker 1: wanted to do, and then she left her family and
Speaker 1: found a place to go watch it. Jennifer Aniston was
Speaker 1: on Friends.
Speaker 2: So what are you suggesting?
Speaker 1: I'm suggesting maybe Oba'm gonna put that in the movie
Speaker 1: because he had a fixation on her. I don't know.
Speaker 1: But why would she be why would Jenner? That is
Speaker 1: like the wire?
Speaker 2: Friend? Why not girlfriends? Why not the Wire? I would
Speaker 2: have preferred, like I would have been with her if
Speaker 2: they had the wire in there.
Speaker 1: I ain't never seen thating like it's the weirdest thing.
Speaker 1: And it's like Obama has been around here by himself
Speaker 1: looking single as fuck. Like, so there's rumors that they're
Speaker 1: getting a divorce him and Michelle.
Speaker 2: Obama would break my heart.
Speaker 1: I don't think there's ever been a presidential divorce before.
Speaker 1: The president's be cheating and ship like that. But it
Speaker 1: has a bit to actually have a left leave it
Speaker 1: to a black woman. We're gonna set precedents around his mother.
Speaker 1: I will get what president that you.
Speaker 2: Was, period as.
Speaker 1: I can't hear her saying that ship now. But the
Speaker 1: other narrative is that she just ain't no on no
Speaker 1: fake ship. She on fucking Trump. So I'm not showing
Speaker 1: up to the things. But we're talking about Jimmy Carter's funeral.
Speaker 2: Too though, right, maybe she's just over all the political
Speaker 2: shiit she like, I just don't want to be bothered
Speaker 2: with none of that.
Speaker 1: I tried to try to help Kamala. That shit ain't work.
Speaker 1: I'm out of there.
Speaker 2: I'm out of there like I'm going on vacation. I'm
Speaker 2: doing the things I want to do.
Speaker 1: So they said she just went on a lot of
Speaker 1: time in Martha's vineyards.
Speaker 2: So that's what she's been out nice wines and eaten
Speaker 2: steaking shrip.
Speaker 1: They're probably fucking on the butler. Okay, she might got
Speaker 1: a boyfriend over there.
Speaker 2: No, she's faithful to Barack.
Speaker 1: Wink wink. I don't know, but I listen, these are humans, right,
Speaker 1: These are just people. I didn't think Jennevaniston was a
Speaker 1: sidebitch type person, but who hey. And then the other
Speaker 1: part is the world is a stage. This is a
Speaker 1: fucking Truman show, like it's a movie. These people are
Speaker 1: all playing characters paid.
Speaker 2: I don't know what people are doing behind closed doors,
Speaker 2: but I just pray to God that that's not true,
Speaker 2: because they just are like uh my idea of the
Speaker 2: perfect marriage. I mean not there's no such thing as perfect, right,
Speaker 2: but close to perfect as it gets.
Speaker 1: I just think they have a good partnership, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Like they're both great orators, like they
Speaker 1: gonna move you with words. I'm saying, exceptionally smart people.
Speaker 1: And we know that men. I'm not gonna say men
Speaker 1: are smart. Men are smart, right, but smart men have smart,
Speaker 1: smarter people around them also. And I think Michelle Obama
Speaker 1: is exceptional, yeah, absolutely right, So because she can move
Speaker 1: a room just like him.
Speaker 2: So that's why I don't want them to I don't
Speaker 2: want it to be any especially No, no, you know,
Speaker 2: I don't have nothing against Jennifer Aniston, but if it was,
Speaker 2: if Baraque was moving around, I would not want it
Speaker 2: to be with a white lady. I didn't say that.
Speaker 1: I did because I'm always say the things people don't
Speaker 1: want to say a fucking white lady. Okay, because let
Speaker 1: me tell y'all, I had this argument a lot with
Speaker 1: one of my friends. I'm like, if Michelle Obama was
Speaker 1: a white woman, Obama would not be the first black president.
Speaker 1: He'd probably be the first Melatto, the first biracial. His
Speaker 1: wife is what constitute his wife and children know that
Speaker 1: black family that we see. If it was a white woman,
Speaker 1: it would be different. If it wouldn't biracial children, people
Speaker 1: wouldn't see him as the first black president. I just
Speaker 1: don't think. So he'd be the first because his mother
Speaker 1: is a Jewish woman, right, so she would be the
Speaker 1: first melatto old president, the first mixed president. So she
Speaker 1: gate like Michelle Obama is what sold us on Barack. Yeah, okay,
Speaker 1: so yes, it would be very disheartening, nigga because what.
Speaker 2: How you cheat on hell?
Speaker 1: But it's on cold for these niggas. Okay, So.
Speaker 2: On Instagram, there's a video circulating. Rapper Big Dank of
Speaker 2: Dev's House recently posted a video documenting her struggles in
Speaker 2: trying to obtain a lift. And this young lady was
Speaker 2: very upset because the lift driver arrived and he saw
Speaker 2: her stature in size and said that she could not
Speaker 2: fit in his car basically, and that he was not
Speaker 2: giving her the lift. And she recorded it and she
Speaker 2: was very upset about it. And I'm kind of on
Speaker 2: the driver side because he don't oh, he don't have
Speaker 2: he has the right to refuse any service. And I mean,
Speaker 2: she do look pretty thick, but I feel like she
Speaker 2: probably could could have fit in his car, you know,
Speaker 2: But I do think about rescue. She's like, who moved
Speaker 2: my seat?
Speaker 1: You know? But rec she's actually smaller than old girl.
Speaker 1: That girl, Yeah, she's a big She doesn't look that tall,
Speaker 1: so she looks like she's probably like five four five
Speaker 1: three or something like that. And she has a lot
Speaker 1: of weight on her. They say four hundred pounds. I
Speaker 1: feel like she's probably like six hundred pounds.
Speaker 2: If y'all no, not that but not that big. But
Speaker 2: she was a big, big girl her face. Car Now
Speaker 2: he's down till you talking about y'all big bitches. Y'all
Speaker 2: big bitches be having a pretty he is faith God damn.
Speaker 2: Like they be beautiful in the face.
Speaker 1: I said, as a fouies be pissed because I know
Speaker 1: this nigga like big pretty bitches, and I obvious seeing a
Speaker 1: big pretty bitch, like I know my nigga fucking her.
Speaker 1: I hate that bitch. I don't even know this person,
Speaker 1: he don't know her, but I'm just like hating on
Speaker 1: this bitch in my mind, like.
Speaker 2: Because I know my mother.
Speaker 1: Will you if yeah, when niggat they make up that bitch,
Speaker 1: it'd be.
Speaker 2: Like gorgeous eats every time.
Speaker 1: So she's a big pretty girl, young girl though she
Speaker 1: doesn't look like she's she can't be thirty.
Speaker 2: But she cannot be. And then she you know, she
Speaker 2: was like I celebrate bbw's and I ride for bbw's
Speaker 2: and y'all who are talking about me aren't bbw's because
Speaker 2: we're beautiful and nice women, right, And I get that
Speaker 2: and I respect that, but I think it's important to
Speaker 2: encourage good health, you know, and like.
Speaker 1: Because nobody wants to be that big.
Speaker 2: No, you want to live a long time. You want
Speaker 2: to be her a long time. You want to be
Speaker 2: able to maneuver and do all the things. Yeah, and
Speaker 2: you can't be happy that size, baby girl, you know,
Speaker 2: like doing things to better your health. I mean, that's
Speaker 2: like someone telling you that they don't want you to
Speaker 2: ride in their car because of your size. Should be
Speaker 2: like a wake up call, especially unless it's like something
Speaker 2: with health that you cannot change your weight. But I don't.
Speaker 2: There might be diseases like that, but I don't personally
Speaker 2: know what anything.
Speaker 1: Well, they developed because of the weight, you know what
Speaker 1: I'm saying, so they might be even harder and bigger.
Speaker 1: You get. The part that killed me is when she
Speaker 1: was like, my friend got a car, got a Mercedes
Speaker 1: just like this, a newer one, and I ride in
Speaker 1: her car just fine, Like your friend loves you. So
Speaker 1: of course your friend is gonna tell you. Gonna tell you, girl,
Speaker 1: you ain't riding in my car because you're big. But
Speaker 1: I'm pretty sure she'd be driving like this, motherfucker bout
Speaker 1: the bus My.
Speaker 2: Tire Well, I don't know if the tires of a bus.
Speaker 1: From a girl, Yes, you cannot like how much like
Speaker 1: we gotta look at Okay, maybe I want to know
Speaker 1: what type of car this was. I'm gonna do some
Speaker 1: research what type of car it was? What is the
Speaker 1: load carried? Like the carry load, like what is the
Speaker 1: spec on that? Because he might and if you have
Speaker 1: smaller low profile tires, like if you fuck on to
Speaker 1: hit a bump, that shit is going to mess up
Speaker 1: as undercarriage for real.
Speaker 2: But another thing is with her being she has youth
Speaker 2: on her side. You can lose some of that weight. Girlfriend,
Speaker 2: you can don't miss.
Speaker 1: The ozimpic wave. Okay, Yeah, like this oziempic is for
Speaker 1: people like that.
Speaker 2: Right, and it is you know, the skinnier ones who
Speaker 2: are just abusing it for vani but which is okay too.
Speaker 2: But girl, you can get down and you can get
Speaker 2: to a healthy weight and not just for pretty purpose
Speaker 2: but or the male gaze, just for health, you know,
Speaker 2: So that I always encourage that, even if you're happy fat,
Speaker 2: because remember how money used to be. Like skinny bitches
Speaker 2: are the devil and they evil. And now look at
Speaker 2: her because she is trying to get skinny her whole life. Yeah,
Speaker 2: you understand that health is well, you know, so that's
Speaker 2: my stakes on it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, girl do better, gotta do better.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 1: She just maybe she needs a better support system around her.
Speaker 1: But I do think like it don't take much. Listen
Speaker 1: we arguing, bitch, you call me fat, like you win.
Speaker 1: So if the the the uber or left drip would
Speaker 1: have done that to me, bitch immediately tomorrow. I just like,
Speaker 1: that's just how my psyche said.
Speaker 2: You always said that, And I was like, if we
Speaker 2: ever get in the real argument, I'm gonna call her fat.
Speaker 1: But here's the I'm gonna call you fat too.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna say it's like that was.
Speaker 1: Because I would never call somebody fat. I would never
Speaker 1: because I know how that makes me feel like. I
Speaker 1: would never That would never be the thing for me
Speaker 1: to win the argument.
Speaker 2: But the crazy part is just because you know how
Speaker 2: to make you feel like some of the things that
Speaker 2: you might say might hurt worse than that. You know
Speaker 2: what you try to I don't know, I can't think.
Speaker 1: Of anyway, y'all. Well we'll talk about today.
Speaker 2: Oh go ahead, mine, is you old like from a
Speaker 2: young bitch, you old ass whole or something like that.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but we be lit and we be looking good
Speaker 1: at these old ass ages like bitch, you wish.
Speaker 2: I had a girl in my DMS, like talking calling
Speaker 2: me an old bitch about her nigga and I didn't
Speaker 2: even know who her nigga? What what is your baby?
Speaker 2: I got all of them because I get back of
Speaker 2: them all, baby girl? Which what are you talking about? Sweetheart?
Speaker 2: You know this?
Speaker 1: Okay, this is another thing holding. This is off of
Speaker 1: uh uh sentence. But y'all have been seeing these uh
Speaker 1: these lists that's going that's going around, like what's the
Speaker 1: onnky and uncle? I mean, what's a auntie? And what's Hawaiian?
Speaker 1: Like the age groups? Yeah, so this list I don't
Speaker 1: agree with it. It says age requirements for each group
Speaker 1: Low Sist eighteen to twenty two, Big Sis twenty three
Speaker 1: to twenty seven, Auntie twenty eight to thirty nine, Cougar
Speaker 1: forty to fifty who the fuck? And then old school
Speaker 1: slash grams is fifty one plus. Like the problem is
Speaker 1: that y'all bitches be having kids to damn early right.
Speaker 2: Okay, here's a child made that list, a child who
Speaker 2: has not lived because Auntie started thirty y'all twenty eight.
Speaker 1: Now, yes, I was somebody's auntie at that age. But
Speaker 1: ain't you bitches auntie? I am not an auntie at
Speaker 1: forty like.
Speaker 2: Gail and Oprah was like, don't call me auntie. I'm
Speaker 2: not your fucking family member.
Speaker 1: And it's some nuanced right, some nuance, Like God, look
Speaker 1: at I feel like, if you have children in you
Speaker 1: your twenties, you actually forty? What having children age you
Speaker 1: rather bitches like it or not? Like I got a
Speaker 1: couple of my friends got rheumatward arthritis and they had
Speaker 1: it since they was thirty, like they might be cooger age.
Speaker 1: But I'm forty. I'm very youth, Okay, I'd be having
Speaker 1: energy to do a lot of things except suck dick.
Speaker 1: And I mean like, sorry, Bro, sorry Bro, I like
Speaker 1: I gotta be going through menopause, Like how dare y'all?
Speaker 2: I don't.
Speaker 1: I don't agree with this. I don't agree with this,
Speaker 1: not one bit. And then also for the for the Wayians,
Speaker 1: the Wayians is eighteen to twenty three. I just love
Speaker 1: that term.
Speaker 2: Whyan and the young nigga right.
Speaker 1: Yeah, young Niggas is eighteen to twenty three. Low Bro
Speaker 1: is twenty four to twenty eight, Big Bros twenty nine
Speaker 1: to thirty eight. Unk is thirty nine to forty nine.
Speaker 2: So why unks start later than an untie?
Speaker 1: Exactly exactly you see kind of you see like cougar
Speaker 1: forty to fifty, but unk is thirty nine to forty nine.
Speaker 2: Because y'all get to stay younger than us. Apparently this
Speaker 2: is just like that Pink Tac shit.
Speaker 1: Hating on us. Man, they be hating on us. So, no,
Speaker 1: I don't agree with that shit because I am not
Speaker 1: an auntie and I'm not a cougar either. No, I'll
Speaker 1: be an auntie, but I'm definitely not a cougar because
Speaker 1: I want money from men like cougars be taking care
Speaker 1: of niggas.
Speaker 2: No, you saw that video or that girl, y'all. I
Speaker 2: don't know if y'all saw that, but it was she
Speaker 2: looking at her thirty. She had on an auntie wig
Speaker 2: though I ain't gonna hold you. I don't have a
Speaker 2: little Auntie hairpiece, and she had her Chase Bank envelope,
Speaker 2: and it looked like they would sit at a restaurant
Speaker 2: and the little Wyian sit his message It was supposed
Speaker 2: to be to his homeboy, but he accidentally sitting in her.
Speaker 2: He's like, I got anitia Baker, the blow a bag
Speaker 2: on me, cash out on me. She's holding that chase,
Speaker 2: not Anita Baker, not the Rapture. Oh my god, I
Speaker 2: would have died if I if he sent me that message.
Speaker 2: But I know that. I like, if I don't get
Speaker 2: married and I don't find my partner, I'm gonna be
Speaker 2: one of them bitches. Ad fifty five, I ain't gonna
Speaker 2: hold you. I'm gonna be taking care of my Wyian
Speaker 2: as well.
Speaker 1: Shit, I'm gonna tell you here that's the older men
Speaker 1: do ship. They buy the happiness, they buy what they want.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna show this.
Speaker 1: Look.
Speaker 2: They're gonna be like forgot Patty Labella here about it,
Speaker 2: because you know Patty a fly ass granny. She looks
Speaker 2: good all the time. That's gonna be like Patty she
Speaker 2: does like her and Gladys name, like eat one of
Speaker 2: these Tanny pies with the pearls, with the pearls. Baby,
Speaker 2: so on our right up for sins. We got a
Speaker 2: d I but we I know and everybody I know
Speaker 2: y'all want to hear about it, but we're not gonna
Speaker 2: discuss it this week. I feel like we're gonna say
Speaker 2: that for like a full episode and let a little
Speaker 2: bit more shit happen before we deep dive into it
Speaker 2: and talk about what it is and how we feel
Speaker 2: about it and what you can do to not care
Speaker 2: or care more.
Speaker 1: Thank you, Thank you for adding that part, because I
Speaker 1: definitely was about to say, like, stop stop caring about
Speaker 1: stuff that really don't affect you for real. Yeah, so
Speaker 1: we'll get into it.
Speaker 2: So okay. I came up with this topic this week, y'all.
Speaker 2: And I don't know if y'all watch Harlem Harlem's Back
Speaker 2: on It's on Prime. It's a show with Meghan Good
Speaker 2: in a beautiful cast of others. I don't know all
Speaker 2: of their names, but they're dope. It kind of reminds
Speaker 2: me of Sex and the City I Ain't gonna hold you.
Speaker 2: It's four friends, Black friends, and Harlem and their relationships
Speaker 2: with men in with each other and the character Quinn.
Speaker 2: She says, we need to decenter the deck and like
Speaker 2: her character has been like very hopeless romantic, always very
Speaker 2: fully consumed with finding a partner. You know, she was
Speaker 2: gold driven, but men were very at the center of
Speaker 2: her existence a lot. And I thought that resonated with
Speaker 2: me so much because I think I'm already in a
Speaker 2: space of desentering Dick, you know, desentering men essentially, not
Speaker 2: just Dick, but men from my life. Ever since I
Speaker 2: broke my foot, I ain't been thinking about no Dick, ain't.
Speaker 2: Nobody's trying to fuck with a broken foot. And since
Speaker 2: then I just been kind of like desentering men. And
Speaker 2: the character Camille has fully centered men in a way
Speaker 2: her the character Ian which I can understand, Y'all's that
Speaker 2: Nigga ty Lepley, Miracle, Watt's husband baby daddy relationship.
Speaker 1: Is fine, fine, fine as hell. The her boyfriend on there, yes,
Speaker 1: oh damn yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, So I can understand it. But she has completely
Speaker 2: focused her energy on She has all these seen great
Speaker 2: things going on. She just got you know, she left
Speaker 2: Columbia and she's writing a book, but instead she's focused
Speaker 2: on her ex. So I wanted to get into how
Speaker 2: the decenter men from your life, even if it's momentarily.
Speaker 2: You know, even in a relationship, your man does not
Speaker 2: have to be the center of your life. I mean,
Speaker 2: he can be important part, but you should be centraized
Speaker 2: at some point. And sometimes I want to get into
Speaker 2: how we can do that and things to do to
Speaker 2: the center right now, so we'll be right back. We're
Speaker 2: going to talk about.
Speaker 1: It, all right, So y'all we're back. And I don't know,
Speaker 1: maybe should pose a question like how many times have
Speaker 1: you put your own dreams, needs, desires like on hold
Speaker 1: centering men? I think we kind of all do it
Speaker 1: younger in age, and it kind of the older you get,
Speaker 1: the more you date, and it could even be after
Speaker 1: a marriage and after having children, that's usually when women
Speaker 1: then start centering themselves, I think, but maybe it needs
Speaker 1: to be done earlier and sooner in life. And I
Speaker 1: think even starting in high school, starting with dating as
Speaker 1: young girls. Right, she's taught to dissenter men.
Speaker 2: Right, because I think oftentimes you know women who like
Speaker 2: they're married, they have kids, and especially with children, we
Speaker 2: got it also, I mean I guess that when we
Speaker 2: had Patrica on, it was desentering children, you know, No, it.
Speaker 1: Was decentering all of them. It's putting yourself, yes, because
Speaker 1: she has a husband also, Yeah, I thought about that
Speaker 1: that episode. Yeah, Like definitely she would be like the
Speaker 1: epitome of Yeah. So I don't think it's just decentering
Speaker 1: men though, it's even just decentering like romantic relationships, yeah,
Speaker 1: because you can get the dick, right, you can still
Speaker 1: have sex, but not making men the focal point.
Speaker 2: Right, not making them such a priority.
Speaker 1: Right that you just you know, disregarding your own needs
Speaker 1: and wants and design.
Speaker 2: And it's so easy to fall into that space, especially
Speaker 2: I feel like for me as a cancer woman, like
Speaker 2: I just turn into like this ball a goo when
Speaker 2: i'm when somebody, yeah, man, I turn into a mush,
Speaker 2: and that mush forms into something that exists in this
Speaker 2: space with this person, Like all I I focus a
Speaker 2: lot on their primary needs over my own. I focus
Speaker 2: a lot on their own their happiness over my own.
Speaker 2: And then I look up and I have resentment exactly. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I then I find myself resenting motherfucker because well I
Speaker 2: always give you the big piece of meat, motherfucker. You know.
Speaker 1: Like, I think that's the first thing you gotta do
Speaker 1: is actually act yourself, like when you're in the midst
Speaker 1: of doing something, Hey, is this for me or is
Speaker 1: this for somebody else? Right, I think that's the first
Speaker 1: way to recognize whether or not you're you know, centering
Speaker 1: somebody else some situation over yourself. Because I feel like
Speaker 1: our lives this like we all got our own personal
Speaker 1: little solar systems. So ask yourself, does do the planets
Speaker 1: revolve around the sun? Or do this? Does the sun
Speaker 1: revolve around the planets? The sun in my fucking world?
Speaker 1: So everybody else got to get in where they fit in.
Speaker 1: And I wasn't always this way. And I can also recognize,
Speaker 1: like how in relationships I wasn't I was putting other
Speaker 1: people like the partner before me, You know what I'm
Speaker 1: saying because in your mind, like I think in most
Speaker 1: women's mind, like we're taught.
Speaker 2: That's how I feel like I was raised, especially.
Speaker 1: If you were raising the church, and I wasn't even
Speaker 1: raised in the church. But y'all would think it's crazy
Speaker 1: how male boys are called sons, Like why do they use
Speaker 1: that word for a man the sun? They are not
Speaker 1: the center but this patriarchy, right, because they could have
Speaker 1: came up with another word. But this world, right is
Speaker 1: ran by patriarchy. Why they are calling men son m
Speaker 1: the son of God? Right? So I think people women
Speaker 1: who grew up in the church, they probably have an
Speaker 1: even harder time desentering men because they don't know how
Speaker 1: deep this programming gos, especially in the Bible, like they
Speaker 1: they the way in the Bible, Like they just make
Speaker 1: women like the worst thing in the Bible. Like there's
Speaker 1: no real good stories about women in the Bible when
Speaker 1: you think about.
Speaker 2: It, you know, I can't speak to that because I
Speaker 2: have not read it in its entirety. I mean I
Speaker 2: think of Ruth, I mean, she had a good story, right,
Speaker 2: what was the story? Well, she was a woman after
Speaker 2: God's heart, she was a good woman, a gard fearing woman.
Speaker 2: And oh yeah, and then she got bo ass she
Speaker 2: got the best man ever. So I guess it really
Speaker 2: wasn't even by her being a good woman to find
Speaker 2: it to be a good wife. And how was he
Speaker 2: to as he was the best man ever? Mmm, like
Speaker 2: that's the type of man we should have all strife
Speaker 2: for a boas. But we'll be getting poe ass, no
Speaker 2: good ass, Like yeah, we just getting all the masses.
Speaker 1: But I feel like, yeah, like people who were raised
Speaker 1: like in a church, they probably have a little bit
Speaker 1: more a tough time because I mean they just tell
Speaker 1: you to find a husband, right, But it does say
Speaker 1: he who finds a wife finds a good thing. Right.
Speaker 1: We should not be centering men, like the Bible says
Speaker 1: men can't be alone. It don't say women can't be alone,
Speaker 1: because I think that a lot of the women, like
Speaker 1: I said, who have been married and then they had
Speaker 1: children or they just always they found solace in themselves,
Speaker 1: right and being okay with that, they don't center men anymore. Right,
Speaker 1: But you got to go through all these things first.
Speaker 1: So what if, right you were in your eighteen and
Speaker 1: you're dating and no one's telling you, oh, you gotta
Speaker 1: find a husband, like that's like the goal in life
Speaker 1: to find these relationships. You don't have to do that
Speaker 1: right now, be about yourself first.
Speaker 2: And you know, I have this list for medium dot
Speaker 2: com and that is actually the number one thing on there.
Speaker 2: It says, decide your teen and twenties belong to you
Speaker 2: and you alone. And I guess it's a lot of
Speaker 2: our listeners are older than that, so it's too late
Speaker 2: for that, baby, if you are ready thing.
Speaker 1: So I think we do actually got a lot of
Speaker 1: a young listener.
Speaker 2: We do have young listeners, but we also have a
Speaker 2: lot of older ones. So that number one ain't for you, baby.
Speaker 2: Number one is for our young girls, like decide that
Speaker 2: these years are for you and it ain't about that.
Speaker 1: That's why i'd be like, it's for about firing niggas
Speaker 1: when they don't act right. That is what your twenties
Speaker 1: is for. It is not for constant compromise. Get the
Speaker 1: fuck up out of there when shit start looking stupid.
Speaker 1: Because I think both of us probably probably stayed in
Speaker 1: situations in our twenties that you know, stayed too long,
Speaker 1: you wasted I don't. I feel like I want to
Speaker 1: stop saying we waste time because I think women count
Speaker 1: time different than men, so we always feel like we
Speaker 1: wasteed some time somewhere. But you you learned, we learned
Speaker 1: from that person, from that relationship.
Speaker 2: I feel, bitch, I beg it different because I don't
Speaker 2: waste it some mother fucking time, all right, So I said,
Speaker 2: don't actively look for a man just yet. And this
Speaker 2: is for my young sisters. Do you know who you are?
Speaker 2: Most women don't even know who they are or what
Speaker 2: they want because they're still growing, you know. And it
Speaker 2: says the prefrontal cortex of the brain develops between eighteen
Speaker 2: and thirty that's the brain area of the brain responsible
Speaker 2: for planning complex cognitive behavior, decision making, and moderating social behavior.
Speaker 2: So let your prefrontal cortex fully developed before you you
Speaker 2: center anyone outside of yourself unless you have two in
Speaker 2: your mom you know, then you gotta move a little differently. Yeah,
Speaker 2: but you don't have to. That's what I'm saying. You
Speaker 2: don't have to if you don't have to, so focus
Speaker 2: on you. So number two says, follow your dreams and
Speaker 2: celebrate your wins. I don't think we celebrate ourselves enough.
Speaker 2: M That was for you, aj.
Speaker 1: I feel like I celebrate myself, but I just don't
Speaker 1: need somebody else doing it with me. I don't feel
Speaker 1: like I don't celebrate me, but people do it in
Speaker 1: different ways, you know, but maybe include others.
Speaker 2: Sorry, I had something in my throat, include others, bitch
Speaker 2: celebrating you.
Speaker 1: I guess I'm not like a big you know, some
Speaker 1: people need that group stuff. I don't really like. Like,
Speaker 1: right now, I'm planning a baby shower be my homegirl,
Speaker 1: but me and her are so much alike in this way.
Speaker 1: She's like, girl, I don't know why the fuck I'm
Speaker 1: doing this. Like I always said, I don't need a
Speaker 1: baby shower all that. Now it becomes like this whole
Speaker 1: big thing, right, But I mean it's it's gonna be nice. Yeah,
Speaker 1: you don't like it at the end, right, you're not
Speaker 1: You did.
Speaker 2: Everything, but it's okay for other people to celebrate your
Speaker 2: wins sometimes, you know, sometimes in life I can understand
Speaker 2: if you're introverted and you don't like the attention. Yeah,
Speaker 2: the attention in the fuzz. But sometimes I don't know
Speaker 2: this bitch a thousand years a birthday party or so
Speaker 2: god damn.
Speaker 1: You know you got one birthday the day you was born.
Speaker 2: We'll celebrating another year, one time with people, all right,
Speaker 2: So this one stick it to the mailgates. Now, this
Speaker 2: one is interesting, and this is one that I really
Speaker 2: wanted to talk about. It says, learn how to be
Speaker 2: comfortable with being ugly, and that's in quotes, and it
Speaker 2: says pretty. Privilege is a social concept that stipulates that
Speaker 2: more attractive people have more friends, money, and success than
Speaker 2: they're less attractive on the park excuse me, And it
Speaker 2: says this is even more true for women. Since the
Speaker 2: beginning of time, we're taught to cater to the malgaze
Speaker 2: and crave mal validation. I can hear some people going, no,
Speaker 2: not I. Even if you have achieved a super self aware,
Speaker 2: conscious state where you defy social pressure you did, at
Speaker 2: some point want to cater to the mailgaze. We are
Speaker 2: all socialized to do so from a young age. The
Speaker 2: toxic results of catering to the mail gaze are evident
Speaker 2: in many ways. Then say drive for the perfect body.
Speaker 2: That's obsession with social media, cloud and the billion dollar
Speaker 2: makeup industry, and it says body dysmorphia and mortality rates
Speaker 2: of BBL procedures on the rise. One in three thousand
Speaker 2: women die from the Brazilian Buffalot butt lift surgery, making
Speaker 2: it the deadliest cosmetic procedure. I think we're on a
Speaker 2: decline of bbls now though.
Speaker 1: Because women are decentering men.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: And then but the thing with the BBL shit is
Speaker 1: that men never said they like that. So the women,
Speaker 1: you know, will claim that they were doing it for themselves.
Speaker 1: But I really believe because y'all, as soon as y'all
Speaker 1: get that ass, you put it on the internet, and
Speaker 1: you can't take no front pictures no more. Everything is
Speaker 1: from the back. So really, who are you trying to
Speaker 1: attract when you do it in that way? Like I
Speaker 1: get dressed and look good for me, I'm gonna tell you,
Speaker 1: I look like a ninja five days a week, and
Speaker 1: if I decide to get cute on the weekends or
Speaker 1: something like that, it is for me. It's not really
Speaker 1: for anybody else, Like I want to feel good and
Speaker 1: look good for me.
Speaker 2: So it says go it gets the status quote do
Speaker 2: things that make you ugly not know and is in
Speaker 2: a quote, and it says, according to the male gaze,
Speaker 2: wear short, natural hair, don't wear makeup or any other
Speaker 2: beauty enhancements. Don't dress to turn hiss, just dress simple.
Speaker 2: This form of defiance against societal expectations is huge, and
Speaker 2: it says you don't have to do it indefinitely. Do
Speaker 2: it for a week or a month, however long it
Speaker 2: takes for you to feel completely confident doing it. Take
Speaker 2: back the power and stick your fingers on the eyes
Speaker 2: of the ominous malgaze. And while you're doing this, it
Speaker 2: would be helpful to stay on social media, as it
Speaker 2: is a big perpetrator of the malgaze.
Speaker 1: I just I just don't agree with that. I just
Speaker 1: don't agree with that.
Speaker 2: Because well, I you know, I did. It's weird.
Speaker 1: I get it, But then it's like you're intentionally trying
Speaker 1: not to look attractive to me. That type of thing
Speaker 1: comes out of trauma. That's a trauma response, you know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. Just think about like people who have
Speaker 1: said like they were molested and abused so they would
Speaker 1: make them this is why they started eating more right,
Speaker 1: so they can become less attractive to people. So to me,
Speaker 1: that's like a trauma response to a bigger problem, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like, I don't want to make
Speaker 1: I don't want to ever. I feel like in relationships
Speaker 1: people have done that to me because I've always had
Speaker 1: the big personality and I've always been me, And I
Speaker 1: feel like I've gotten into relationships with people with men
Speaker 1: who feel like they needed to dim my light. They
Speaker 1: needed to dim my son right because I saw it
Speaker 1: shine so bright. So they are attracted to the sun
Speaker 1: and when they get the sun, now you're trying to
Speaker 1: make it to where like you're the only person that
Speaker 1: can see it, so you want to put some fucking
Speaker 1: shade on me and try to make me feel in
Speaker 1: different about myself because I feel good about myself. You
Speaker 1: gotta be careful with that type of.
Speaker 2: Sho But but here's the thing, I don't think it's
Speaker 2: saying like do it for other people. I think that
Speaker 2: this is encouraging you to do it for yourself. Like,
Speaker 2: if you're spending so much time trying to be attractive
Speaker 2: for others, just be like, don't focus on everyone else
Speaker 2: and how you look to everyone else and how your
Speaker 2: appearance makes everyone else feel, you know, decenter that shit,
Speaker 2: you know, just to go out ugly not ugly, not
Speaker 2: because they call it, but it's in quotations, so it's
Speaker 2: like saying, like, what's ugly to you?
Speaker 1: Then?
Speaker 2: Yeah, like without all the enhancements, without all the makeup,
Speaker 2: without all the weaves and wigs and tight fitting clothes
Speaker 2: and your ass cheeks hanging out the back of them skirts,
Speaker 2: you know, like because I mean that's definitely for the
Speaker 2: male gaze, you know, things like that. So stuff like that.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna tell y'all how I have been. I don't
Speaker 2: know if I can count this, but I'm going to
Speaker 2: for the sake of the conversation. I have not shaved
Speaker 2: my legs or my vagina since I broke my foot.
Speaker 1: I think you're only doing that so you don't have sex, bitch.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. We're not really dissentering, dick. We
Speaker 1: just were sent dissentering, like, no.
Speaker 2: It's not. If I wanted to fuck with this, I would.
Speaker 2: It's not that. It's that I just and just being
Speaker 2: all oh natural, like it is what it is right now,
Speaker 2: and I just don't care to as long as it's
Speaker 2: I'm clean. I'm clean. It's just not it's unkept.
Speaker 1: Well, the winter is the best time to do that, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: you get that extra sweaty stench in summer, so it
Speaker 1: is okay to do that shit winter, I think. But
Speaker 1: I think in the way in the summertime, like we
Speaker 1: ain't just shaving it for sex.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it just holds onto the scent.
Speaker 1: But yeah, like we're just trying to stay groomed.
Speaker 2: But my legs have never been hairer in my entire life,
Speaker 2: I think. And I'm just okay with it. I'm just
Speaker 2: so fine. I'll be in the bed, rob I could
Speaker 2: start a firing this bed with how much hair on
Speaker 2: my legs right there, and I just do not care.
Speaker 2: I do not care nobody's seeing it, and I'm okay
Speaker 2: with it. You know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I shave less in the winter, but it's nearly not.
Speaker 1: I mean, it's just because I just do.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but since I broke my foot in September. It
Speaker 2: is January. You know, that's long. That's a long time.
Speaker 2: You know what I do not give food is what
Speaker 2: it is now. My armpits. I can't not for whatever reason.
Speaker 2: I just have. I can't just let that grow, but.
Speaker 1: Because somebody might fuck her and see it. Like you're
Speaker 1: in the gym with a T top on you.
Speaker 2: I don't be in the gym with tank tops when
Speaker 2: I like, when I there is, that is a place
Speaker 2: where I definitely try to decenter the malegates. I when
Speaker 2: I go in the gym, I have on big T shirts, long,
Speaker 2: I have on big hoodies. I definitely just try to
Speaker 2: cover myself and be very invisible in that space. Please
Speaker 2: don't bother me, Please don't look at me, and don't
Speaker 2: say shit to me. Right so I don't take my
Speaker 2: I don't have like, you know, the girls coming in there.
Speaker 2: I saw a girl in the gym yesterday with dangly earrings,
Speaker 2: a necklace and glasses with like you know, living the
Speaker 2: workout and she's just prancing on the.
Speaker 1: Looking for a man.
Speaker 2: And I ain't even mad. Girl. If that's your goal
Speaker 2: for twenty twenty five is to catch catch, but girl,
Speaker 2: you it's not working out with them danglar ereians.
Speaker 1: Fully clothed like outfits like I do like matching because
Speaker 1: I feel like I feel more motivated to work out
Speaker 1: when I look good. So I don't ever wear like
Speaker 1: the big T shirts and stuff like that, or like
Speaker 1: if I do do a sweatshirt, it's just so I
Speaker 1: can sweat more. Like It's really like I probably got
Speaker 1: like one of them sweat bag shits on underneath that
Speaker 1: shit too. But I like to feel good. I like,
Speaker 1: I like to look good, and it's not really about
Speaker 1: who is looking at me, Like I'm looking in the
Speaker 1: mirror in there trying to see how good I look
Speaker 1: to me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I understand that, and I understand that perspective, but
Speaker 2: I'm just more concerned about what's going on under these
Speaker 2: clothes while I'm in the gym, like because I know
Speaker 2: I'm sweating. Yesterday I got on that I was on
Speaker 2: the Stare climber for forty five minutes and that's the
Speaker 2: longest I've been on since I broke my foot, and
Speaker 2: I was so proud of that, and nothing about it
Speaker 2: was cute, nothing like I had on. I don't even
Speaker 2: think nothing I had on matched. It was just my
Speaker 2: period on. So I had big draws, like it was
Speaker 2: a lot going on, and it was not cute, but
Speaker 2: I was so excited for what I had just done,
Speaker 2: you know, for the first time, because I could not
Speaker 2: do that when I when I first went back to
Speaker 2: the gym, I barely could stay on there fifteen minutes
Speaker 2: without my foot starting to hurt, without being winded. And
Speaker 2: now I'm back up to forty five. Bitch, you couldn't
Speaker 2: tell me nothing. Now let me tell you this what
Speaker 2: helped me get to forty five minutes. Have y'all waxed
Speaker 2: or riches started on Netflix? Have y'all been watching Girl?
Speaker 2: That is entertainment?
Speaker 1: I ain't seen it, of course, I've seen it preview.
Speaker 2: For it, but well it's good. I mean it's like
Speaker 2: trash TV. Obviously it's reality trash TV, but it was good.
Speaker 2: So I was watching that and it helped me. I
Speaker 2: lost track of time and I looked I was at
Speaker 2: forty minutes. I was like, oh, let me do five more.
Speaker 2: But so that was decentering the mel Gays. The next
Speaker 2: one says, layoff romantic music, books and movies, but those things.
Speaker 1: Are all feel good things. But do they make you
Speaker 1: feel like you want to be in love, that maybe
Speaker 1: it is doing something to you subconsciously.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I do. Every time I listen to romantic music,
Speaker 2: I might go look at somebody.
Speaker 1: Instagram page, So instead go listen to Kaya. You can't
Speaker 1: trust no nigga, no no.
Speaker 2: That's the completely opposite that might write you talking all right,
Speaker 2: so it says. One of the biggest reasons women center
Speaker 2: their lives around men is the influence of media. Cultivation theory,
Speaker 2: proposed by George Gerbner in nineteen sixty nine, is the
Speaker 2: idea that the long term consumption of media affects people's ideas,
Speaker 2: which is true. Mass methods of media dissemination are used
Speaker 2: by communities to spread ideas, movies, and form most people's
Speaker 2: view of romance. Romantic comedies are the primary offenders when
Speaker 2: it comes to most people's unrealistic ideals and expectations of relationships.
Speaker 2: Disney is another primary offender, socializing us with unrealistic and
Speaker 2: downright toxic views of relationships from childhood. If you're on
Speaker 2: the TIC, if you're on TikTok, you've probably heard Salem
Speaker 2: a lazy song mad at Disney, and if you haven't,
Speaker 2: go listen to it. The song speaks of the whimsical
Speaker 2: way women are taught to view relationships. A prince will
Speaker 2: come and whiskey away on his horse. The only thing
Speaker 2: is in reality, it's far from fantasy. Men in the
Speaker 2: books and movies are nothing like men in real life.
Speaker 2: Men in the media are portrayed as saviors. Perhaps this
Speaker 2: is why many women are so comfortable sendering their lives
Speaker 2: around me in and host that one day they will
Speaker 2: be living out their fairy tale dreams.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they sold us, They sold us some bullshit. I
Speaker 1: think that. Uh you know that post breakup glow up?
Speaker 2: Mm hmm.
Speaker 1: If you're wondering, like how to decenter men, just if
Speaker 1: you ever had that post break up glow up, that
Speaker 1: glow up only happened. It happened because you decentered men.
Speaker 1: Was like, fuck these niggas. I'm gonna get on my ship.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get the killer body, I'm gonna get more money,
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get a better position at work. Like you
Speaker 1: wanted to prove something, but it's still kind of centered
Speaker 1: a little bit, right, You wanted to prove something.
Speaker 2: To use them as your motivation, exactly better to yourself.
Speaker 1: Right, but it's also I think another dangerous part is
Speaker 1: using decentered men to get a better man. That's dangerous too, Yeah,
Speaker 1: because you still center in a relationship, because it's still.
Speaker 2: Not a nigga. You know, I'm gonna one up that motherfucker.
Speaker 2: When I pull back up, I'm gonna have a better nigga.
Speaker 2: It's still about a nigga, not about you.
Speaker 1: So yeah, decentering men is really about you, and I
Speaker 1: think you can we probably can learn more and more
Speaker 1: and more about that from older women because they already
Speaker 1: did all the things, but we want to try to
Speaker 1: get there before all the bullshit.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but oftentimes I find that the older women who
Speaker 2: have decentered men is out of.
Speaker 1: It's trauma.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's out of they're being tainted in there. What's
Speaker 2: the word that people use for women who they're scorned. Yeah,
Speaker 2: I don't I don't want That's.
Speaker 1: What I'm saying. Like, the goal is to decenter men
Speaker 1: before ye get to that resentment.
Speaker 2: Stage I don't want. Yeah, I don't want us. And
Speaker 2: that means me, you, AJ and all of y'all listening
Speaker 2: to get to a place of resentment for men before
Speaker 2: you dissenter them. Because you don't want to my mom
Speaker 2: be saying. I hope she won't be mad at me
Speaker 2: for saying it. She's like, girl, a man comes second
Speaker 2: to a good book and a glass of warm milk
Speaker 2: at this point in my life, So she rather read
Speaker 2: and have a glass of warm milk before being bothered
Speaker 2: with a man. And I don't ever want to feel
Speaker 2: like that. I love these niggas. I want to always
Speaker 2: love them. I don't want to like I love books.
Speaker 2: I'm already halfway there, you know, Because I love them.
Speaker 2: I always want to love them. And I always want
Speaker 2: to value men in my life and I still want one,
Speaker 2: but I just don't want I want to make sure
Speaker 2: that I desenter them in a way that's healthy for me,
Speaker 2: and when I get in a relationship, be able to
Speaker 2: continue to do that, you know, to have that balance.
Speaker 1: That's where I am now. Yeah, So and this is
Speaker 1: I think this is I may not call it desentering,
Speaker 1: but you know how i'd be like, I want to
Speaker 1: feel single in a relationship. I never want to lose
Speaker 1: my identity. I want to be with somebody who really
Speaker 1: assess me for who I am, and even my current partner,
Speaker 1: because y'all notice is an old partner. It's a new
Speaker 1: relationship with old partner.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 1: He had to get here because I've always been me right,
Speaker 1: and even now he can admit to some of the
Speaker 1: things like he did in the past, like hating on me.
Speaker 1: You know what I'm saying, Like niggas really be in
Speaker 1: competition with you in a relationship when they don't have
Speaker 1: the emotional intelligence yet to be and even in a
Speaker 1: relationship with a real fucking woman. You know what I'm saying,
Speaker 1: Because I've been grown for.
Speaker 2: A long time, but you're still growing. You're not the
Speaker 2: same person. You've grown too.
Speaker 1: No, that's what I be trying to tell him, Like
Speaker 1: I'm not the same person, you know, because I feel
Speaker 1: like I'm not really centering. But in a relationship, I
Speaker 1: compromised a lot, and you know you had that resentment
Speaker 1: because you did all this compromising. Like I feel like
Speaker 1: the times I've moved, it was either moving from a
Speaker 1: nigga to get away from a I'm moving to one. Yeah, right,
Speaker 1: So now I'm trying to make sure that the decisions
Speaker 1: that I make in life are solely for me. Now,
Speaker 1: if you benefit from him from these good decisions, kudos
Speaker 1: to you. But I'm not considering anybody else anymore, and
Speaker 1: he has to be okay with that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, now, I'm okay with considering others in my decisions,
Speaker 2: but I just don't want to consider them more than
Speaker 2: myself anymore, you know, Like, I don't want to make
Speaker 2: my choice based on the betterment of this other person,
Speaker 2: and because I love him so much, and that has
Speaker 2: been the status quo since the beginning of time for me,
Speaker 2: and I thought that was the way of a good woman,
Speaker 2: you know, that is the way of a good woman.
Speaker 2: This is how I prove that I'm a little I'm
Speaker 2: a down ass bitch y'all. And all it left me
Speaker 2: was down, you know.
Speaker 1: So an example of somebody who centers men too much
Speaker 1: are the ones who the women who say I got
Speaker 1: no female friends. I just got to like, ma'am, you
Speaker 1: don't get an award for that. You're actually a weirdo.
Speaker 1: And I don't want to be your friend anyway, because
Speaker 1: you probably think everybody be hating on you or really
Speaker 1: not even a good person like I'm because men are
Speaker 1: not good people sometimes a lot of times.
Speaker 2: Anytime a woman always if I see like a woman
Speaker 2: always posting about people jealous of them girl.
Speaker 1: Good, nobody could like this is a general like, Okay,
Speaker 1: you're whack.
Speaker 2: Actually it's okay, Like sometimes people are jealous and it's true.
Speaker 2: But if you are always speaking on people being jealous
Speaker 2: of you, there's something for you to unpack there, because
Speaker 2: everybody ain't fucking jealous of you, and that's a mental
Speaker 2: that's some mental shit going on, and maybe that comes
Speaker 2: that might respond from childhood because some mamas be teaching
Speaker 2: girls they're jealous of you. They just jealous of you.
Speaker 2: They just jealous of you. And now you grow up
Speaker 2: believing that every bitch out here is you and they not.
Speaker 1: We talked about that last week with that episode on
Speaker 1: Love and Hip Hop Miami.
Speaker 2: But uh.
Speaker 1: Yeah, an old girl like girl, everybody is not hating
Speaker 1: on you, I promise. If you got a sucky ass
Speaker 1: attitude and a lot of people be saying, bitch, you
Speaker 1: got a nasty ass attitude, and it's like a general
Speaker 1: consensus that it's probably true.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you gotta do some self awareness and understand that
Speaker 2: maybe you're not as great as you think you are.
Speaker 1: Yes, everybody else cannot always be the problem.
Speaker 2: Right, because if everybody say you were smoking crack for
Speaker 2: twenty years, Whitney Houston, you're smoking crack. You know what
Speaker 2: I'm saying, You were smoking Whinney Houston. I love her, but.
Speaker 1: Don't talk about WINNYE. Houston on this show.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm sorry because I love Whitney Houston. She's the
Speaker 2: voice of all time. But if everybody say they.
Speaker 1: Start smoking crack, like how people feel about Beyonce, is
Speaker 1: how I feel about Whitney Houston, like.
Speaker 2: To your age. I know my sister would be cuss
Speaker 2: me out if she heard that. Right now. I apologize
Speaker 2: to all the Whitni lovers because I love her too,
Speaker 2: But that was just an example of everybody ain't gonna
Speaker 2: say the same shit about you for twenty years and
Speaker 2: they no truth to it. You know, we don't have
Speaker 2: anything else to offer this list. Let's see. There was
Speaker 2: one more, and I think we kind of touched on
Speaker 2: this one that it says, realize that men are just human. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and like you know, removing from this pedestal.
Speaker 1: And we're God's right, We the son, not da ain't
Speaker 1: the son. They could be the s o N, but
Speaker 1: we are the s u N Like we literally give
Speaker 1: life right. So at what point do you feel like
Speaker 1: You're not important. And I'm not telling people to have
Speaker 1: a God complex. But look what happens when we start
Speaker 1: decentering men. You have these red pel niggas you got
Speaker 1: in cells that come out of what works this I
Speaker 1: think I sent you this guy Instagram page is called
Speaker 1: fit Fit Flex or something like that. Black guy, Nice
Speaker 1: Bill African Nigerian Nigga. But he was he'd be interviewing
Speaker 1: like men they want to know how they can beef
Speaker 1: up their parents to get women. And so he is
Speaker 1: experiencing with a lot of women experience with these men,
Speaker 1: just having these conversations and seeing how childish these men are.
Speaker 1: Some of them are borderline serial killers as far as
Speaker 1: I'm concerned. Right when we desenter men, they get so
Speaker 1: antsy they don't know how to take it. They mad
Speaker 1: at us when we were like, okay, I don't even man,
Speaker 1: I'm happy being alone. If y'all say, I'm a die
Speaker 1: by myself, okay, So what They're still mad at women
Speaker 1: who choose to be alone because they still feel like
Speaker 1: like they feel so entitled to women, like I should
Speaker 1: still have access to you.
Speaker 2: But you know what is because they were raised similar,
Speaker 2: they were raised like us. They will listening to the
Speaker 2: fairy tales. They think they're the knight in shining armor.
Speaker 1: But the moms also treat them like that too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, because their mom say, fucking fairy tale. So
Speaker 2: now her son got to be, you know, the night
Speaker 2: shine or that's what they would want him to be,
Speaker 2: and then her eyes he is. But to the rest
Speaker 2: of us, your son ship, mama, So.
Speaker 1: Stop texting that man first. Stop texting these niggas first.
Speaker 1: I'm not telling you.
Speaker 2: To like I ain't interest. Sometimes you got to go
Speaker 2: after you.
Speaker 1: Know, if you are always doing that, try your best
Speaker 1: like this.
Speaker 2: Doesn't you mean like just always be the first one
Speaker 2: to reach out?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 2: No, yes, I mean like maybe if y'all meet, you
Speaker 2: can be the first one to say something. If you
Speaker 2: really gotta be reciprocal, definitely don't be don't always be available, Yeah,
Speaker 2: acting like you're just sitting by the phone waiting on.
Speaker 1: On the first ring and ship like that. Stop texting
Speaker 1: men and calling men and asking them to take you
Speaker 1: on a date. Don't do that, ship, because don't be
Speaker 1: surprised when he expects your ass to pay. Also, right,
Speaker 1: you know, these are the things that women probably can
Speaker 1: start doing it's off top of my damn brain. Just
Speaker 1: stop doing these things to try to start decentering men
Speaker 1: a little bit in your life and desentering that want
Speaker 1: for relationships. Because when you're not expecting things, that's when
Speaker 1: it happens. That's that's the moment it happens for you
Speaker 1: when you stop expecting it, when you stop fixating on it,
Speaker 1: even journaling. Right, So write down all the things you want,
Speaker 1: write down the exact man you want. Ball that shit
Speaker 1: up and throw it in the trash, forget about it,
Speaker 1: burn it and watch it happen. Right, set it and
Speaker 1: forget it. Is that's how you really decenter men, and
Speaker 1: then just focus on you. Focus on being the best
Speaker 1: you possible, focus on looking the best for you, focus
Speaker 1: on your mental health, Go get a therapist, whatever you
Speaker 1: gotta do, you know, to get back to you.
Speaker 2: Spiritual spirituality, whatever that looks like. This church for you
Speaker 2: can start going to church starting or whatever whatever it
Speaker 2: is for you. Gotta be no, that's not you know,
Speaker 2: you got to speak to what works for you. You can't,
Speaker 2: you know, make sure this is what because I mean
Speaker 2: churchin for everybody, but church are for some, so you know,
Speaker 2: for those who it is for you know, you know,
Speaker 2: is very.
Speaker 1: The church in which the way they have it today
Speaker 1: is very patriarchal. Right, so we're talking about decentering men.
Speaker 1: I think everything in small doses. I'll say that, then
Speaker 1: just do it.
Speaker 2: I mean, yeah, just I mean when I say that,
Speaker 2: I mean, like, you know, try to you know, include
Speaker 2: God more or whoever you worship, whoever you worship, or
Speaker 2: if you don't worship, find something, find some some spiritual guide,
Speaker 2: you know, and use that in your life, you know,
Speaker 2: versus being outside smoking, drinking, hookah, smoking hookah, fucking and
Speaker 2: all the things that ain't healthy, you know. So that's
Speaker 2: you know, I want to get more into my scripture
Speaker 2: and read more. And then I also want to like
Speaker 2: research other religions. You know. I was looking at uh
Speaker 2: mantu peach you how you say, And I was looking
Speaker 2: at how all these walls and all these hieroglyphics had
Speaker 2: this guy who was holding two animals, an animal in
Speaker 2: each hand, and it was all over the world they
Speaker 2: depicted this same uh deity, I guess, And I want
Speaker 2: to research who that is because how all of y'all,
Speaker 2: like y'all didn't have facetimed y'all didn't have you know,
Speaker 2: the everywhere. Yeah, but the same figure appears all over
Speaker 2: the world.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. He probably was appearing physically, right
Speaker 1: like right now, we're believing. So there's that's why there's
Speaker 1: a difference between the knowing, which is what you're trying
Speaker 1: to do get to the bottom and doing the research, right,
Speaker 1: and then there's there's belief. That's why I'd be like,
Speaker 1: really have a belief system is either I know or
Speaker 1: I don't know, right, because believing.
Speaker 2: Is just faith.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's all it is. Right, You didn't actually see
Speaker 1: the thing, so that that image being painted around the world,
Speaker 1: They probably physically saw this thing so different parts of
Speaker 1: the world. So that so we're waiting on this image
Speaker 1: to come back right that nobody has really ever seen
Speaker 1: in a very long time, to create a new image
Speaker 1: of it. People have literally created an image, because that's
Speaker 1: just how humans compute things like the imagery. You got
Speaker 1: to have got to see it to bring right. Well, no,
Speaker 1: because we don't be seeing it and be believing.
Speaker 2: It right, Well, faith, you know, it's faith because we
Speaker 2: believe somebody saw it, you know. So but then that's
Speaker 2: where that's where I want to invest some time into
Speaker 2: like just deep diving into religions and cultures and things
Speaker 2: like that and getting more understanding because how up did
Speaker 2: they build that ship? I want to know how they
Speaker 2: build that? How did they build that where they're giants
Speaker 2: moving around like things like that. That's what I'm interested in.
Speaker 2: So my leg's gonna be Harriet, I'm gonna be well.
Speaker 1: Sign up for Guya TV. G A, I A. That's
Speaker 1: a good place to start. Guya TV has a lot
Speaker 1: of documentaries. You know, Bill Carson, Billy Carson, h like
Speaker 1: you know, he talks about this is this is what
Speaker 1: the esoteric knowledge is is learning the things that not
Speaker 1: a lot of people know. Basically because people a lot
Speaker 1: of people it's just one way. It's real skewed. It's
Speaker 1: just religion is Christianity and that's it. But there are
Speaker 1: a lot of things that are way older than Christianity.
Speaker 1: So that's why I just I feel like it's just
Speaker 1: all about the Bible is a book about you. Basic
Speaker 1: instructions before leaving Earth is what the word Bible breaks
Speaker 1: down to. That's what some people say. So it's just
Speaker 1: a book about you.
Speaker 2: I think it's just a bunch of allegory and fable
Speaker 2: prior crabs to help us be better human beings. You know,
Speaker 2: as long as you are, you know, actively trying to
Speaker 2: be good at all times and like be good to
Speaker 2: others and good to yourself. I don't think it matter
Speaker 2: which exactly the thing you you subscribe to.
Speaker 1: You know, I just be liking to know all the things,
Speaker 1: so I'm never just fixed on the one thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well that's and that's the space. I want to
Speaker 2: learn so much more about just the world that I
Speaker 2: don't know and the things that I don't understand and
Speaker 2: things that because I want to now, I like, I
Speaker 2: want a nigga to take me look a nigga. I
Speaker 2: want a nigga to take me to match a peach
Speaker 2: you de center taking me the center D Center. I'm
Speaker 2: working on it, y'all, on my work in progress. But
Speaker 2: do you have a last last?
Speaker 1: I think we pretty much gave it right for the
Speaker 1: most part. Uh, focus on yourself, do some meditation, figure
Speaker 1: out you know, like I said, if anything is, when
Speaker 1: something's not good for you, you don't have energy for it.
Speaker 1: When it's good, you got a lot of energy. So
Speaker 1: if you're in any situations in a relationship and you
Speaker 1: just don't have energy and it's just like sucking me
Speaker 1: a life force. It's probably time for you to de
Speaker 1: center that thing. Mm hmm, I mean right and focus next.
Speaker 2: I know it's some of y'all who listen to me
Speaker 2: right now, hungover right now because you drink too much.
Speaker 2: You know who I'm talking to. You heard me. I'm
Speaker 2: talking to you, girl, you drink too much? Cut back.
Speaker 2: I know it's a beach like girl.
Speaker 1: Hang up on that shit, not even a liquor weed,
Speaker 1: you know what I'm saying, Because I feel like when
Speaker 1: you hide, like you really don't get the things done
Speaker 1: that you want to get done, Like you're literally sitting
Speaker 1: smoking and thinking about the things that you never execute
Speaker 1: because that shit makes you fucking lazy. Sometimes some people
Speaker 1: can be active on weed. I'm not one of them people.
Speaker 1: So that's just not going to ever be one of
Speaker 1: my damn vices, which I be struggling to get up
Speaker 1: and go regular, you know what I'm saying. So I
Speaker 1: can't add no extra substance to this, to this body
Speaker 1: to have me any more sluggish than I can be
Speaker 1: on something already.
Speaker 2: Right, Okay, So before we go, I just want to
Speaker 2: say that our producer just sent me a link, both
Speaker 2: of us a link saying that this goes back to
Speaker 2: her sins real quick. But I just feel like we
Speaker 2: should add it before we go. The Detroit rapper, the
Speaker 2: girl big dank m with the pretty face, she's suing
Speaker 2: Lyft right now. She's decided to sue Lift because I.
Speaker 1: Don't think she has a lawsuit. And any attorney who
Speaker 1: picked that up, he just about to take money from her, yeah,
Speaker 1: to represent her. Because these are these these are independent
Speaker 1: contractors who work for Lift, and and uh, these are
Speaker 1: their personal vehicles. Even the ones who have a car
Speaker 1: from the companies, they're still making the car payment. Those
Speaker 1: are their cars. And you can decline if I don't
Speaker 1: like how person looked like I look like he might
Speaker 1: be a serial kill and he's gonna kill me. I
Speaker 1: can decline that ride when I pull up, I.
Speaker 2: Can, right, But can you discriminate based upon.
Speaker 1: That wasn't discrimination? That was really it was really a risk.
Speaker 1: That wasn't I don't think it was discrimination because she's big.
Speaker 1: It was really about can this person ride in my car?
Speaker 1: For real? That wasn't discrimination. It was really about logistics.
Speaker 2: Well, we're gonna see, y'all, We're gonna revisit this and
Speaker 2: see if she win this case. Now they have a
Speaker 2: video of her walking through this hallway, and you might
Speaker 2: be right. She might be closer to six hundred pounds.
Speaker 2: She is.
Speaker 1: One of my sisters used to be like four hundred
Speaker 1: pounds and she was narrow, not nearly the size of
Speaker 1: that girl. So I have a visual like, yeah, she
Speaker 1: she needs to get gastric something something. She's not gonna
Speaker 1: live a long time. And people do. People do discriminate
Speaker 1: on bigger people. Jobs might discriminate on you. You know
Speaker 1: what I'm saying. You probably get like a call center
Speaker 1: job where you're sitting down all day long, that type
Speaker 1: of thing. But people do discriminate on bigger people. But
Speaker 1: I don't think this situation with the lyft driver was
Speaker 1: a situation where she was being discriminated on. It was
Speaker 1: really about logistics. He was concerned about busting attire. Yeah,
Speaker 1: and she does need a bigger vehicle. When we look
Speaker 1: at six hundred pound life, what they come pick them
Speaker 1: people up in. They be coming to get having forklifts
Speaker 1: and all type of shit. Yeah, if somebody dies in
Speaker 1: a home or if somebody needs to get moved and
Speaker 1: they can't move themselves. She is borderline right now. Yes,
Speaker 1: bad situation.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think she really needs to instead of
Speaker 2: focusing on this, focusing on how she can get healthy.
Speaker 2: She is a very very big girl. In your body.
Speaker 2: Your heart, legs can't take that, can't handle all of that.
Speaker 2: But does need to hear No, Dad, I just got
Speaker 2: that in there. I just want to add that, y'all
Speaker 2: before we get up out here. We've been talking an
Speaker 2: hour and twenty minutes. Me and AJ could literally get
Speaker 2: on here and do a marathon conversation and it never
Speaker 2: get dub This is why we.
Speaker 1: Don't talk of the phone that much. No more, bitch,
Speaker 1: because we'd be having to save content for one It's
Speaker 1: like it just get to be too much talking. Like
Speaker 1: by the time me and Tamy done talk thirty minutes,
Speaker 1: were like, bitch, you could have just recorded.
Speaker 2: Yes, it could have been an episode at this point and.
Speaker 1: Maybe guys, we'll start doing if we want to call
Speaker 1: each other on the phone, we need to be on here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's what we're gonna do.
Speaker 1: That's the bonus episode.
Speaker 2: That's gonna be our bonus episodes because we got a
Speaker 2: lot to say, but I don't be.
Speaker 1: I feel like I be monitored, not monitored, censored, you
Speaker 1: know what I'm saying, Like, you gotta you do have
Speaker 1: to censor yourself a little bit when you speak it
Speaker 1: to the public.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean something mose.
Speaker 1: I might not say on here Patreon.
Speaker 2: I ain't even saying some of that shit on there
Speaker 2: so much.
Speaker 1: I wouldn't.
Speaker 2: My thoughts belong to me. And that's it, you know.
Speaker 2: And that way? All right, girl, close us oute of
Speaker 2: this motherfucker.
Speaker 1: All Right, y'all, let's if you enjoyed this episode, y'all
Speaker 1: tune in every Thursday on The Black Effect, iHeartRadio app
Speaker 1: or wherever the fuck you get your podcast at. This
Speaker 1: is your co host, A j Holiday two point zero
Speaker 1: on instagrams.
Speaker 2: Kick It Tam y'all's official tam banm on Instagram. I
Speaker 2: love y'all. So we have decentered men this week, but
Speaker 2: for Valentine's Day, we're gonna recent it a ass because
Speaker 2: it's valatized and we're gonna do something funny for y'all.
Speaker 2: So y'all, just, you know, continue to listen, and we
Speaker 2: appreciate y'all for tuning in weekly. We love y'all as
Speaker 2: to speak.
Speaker 1: Now and never hold them dicks like let them digs go. Girl,
Speaker 1: put yourself first.
Speaker 2: Think.
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