1 00:00:00,280 --> 00:00:03,000 Speaker 1: Levels to This is an iHeart women's sports production in 2 00:00:03,080 --> 00:00:06,080 Speaker 1: partnership with Deep Blue Sports and Entertainment. You can find 3 00:00:06,160 --> 00:00:09,559 Speaker 1: us on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you 4 00:00:09,600 --> 00:00:13,480 Speaker 1: get your podcasts. 5 00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:19,160 Speaker 2: Hey, everybody, what's going on? It's your girl, Trerika Foster 6 00:00:19,239 --> 00:00:25,640 Speaker 2: Bradsby And this is another episode of Levels to This. Now, 7 00:00:25,760 --> 00:00:29,320 Speaker 2: I bet you're wondering, why is it just so Rika? 8 00:00:29,680 --> 00:00:33,599 Speaker 2: Where is Cheryl? Well, Cheryl is under the weather today, 9 00:00:33,720 --> 00:00:34,840 Speaker 2: So guess what that means. 10 00:00:34,880 --> 00:00:35,599 Speaker 3: That means you. 11 00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:38,960 Speaker 2: Got me, You got your girl. Get ready for a 12 00:00:39,000 --> 00:00:41,839 Speaker 2: wonderful and fun time. But listen, I'm not going to 13 00:00:41,880 --> 00:00:46,120 Speaker 2: spend a whole bunch of time talking about craziness that 14 00:00:46,200 --> 00:00:49,760 Speaker 2: I typically would in a usual surface level conversation because 15 00:00:49,760 --> 00:00:52,480 Speaker 2: I'm talking to myself. So it's a little weird, don't 16 00:00:52,520 --> 00:00:56,360 Speaker 2: you think. With that being said, though we are already 17 00:00:56,440 --> 00:00:59,840 Speaker 2: off and running to an amazing WNBA season, there are 18 00:01:00,080 --> 00:01:04,160 Speaker 2: a lot of players and teams who are doing their 19 00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:07,600 Speaker 2: best to kind of get to the championship, none more 20 00:01:08,280 --> 00:01:11,640 Speaker 2: prominently doing so other than the New York Liberty who 21 00:01:11,680 --> 00:01:15,000 Speaker 2: are undefeated at this point and the Minnesota Links that 22 00:01:15,080 --> 00:01:17,560 Speaker 2: is undefeated at this point, and it brought me to 23 00:01:18,840 --> 00:01:22,360 Speaker 2: what we were talking about a couple of months ago, 24 00:01:22,600 --> 00:01:26,000 Speaker 2: maybe even longer than that, but at some point Sheryl 25 00:01:26,040 --> 00:01:28,800 Speaker 2: and I had a conversation about goal setting, and we 26 00:01:28,800 --> 00:01:31,119 Speaker 2: were talking about how you can use things that are 27 00:01:31,120 --> 00:01:33,920 Speaker 2: happening and use things that are going on to help 28 00:01:33,959 --> 00:01:36,400 Speaker 2: you set great goals that will get you to where 29 00:01:36,440 --> 00:01:39,840 Speaker 2: you need to be. And I feel like the links 30 00:01:39,840 --> 00:01:43,400 Speaker 2: in the Liberty listen to that conversation because the goals 31 00:01:43,440 --> 00:01:46,560 Speaker 2: that they have set for themselves this season has been amazing, right, 32 00:01:46,880 --> 00:01:50,600 Speaker 2: And I think that that conversation was so amazing and 33 00:01:50,640 --> 00:01:55,720 Speaker 2: that conversation was so impactful that I want to share 34 00:01:55,720 --> 00:01:58,080 Speaker 2: that conversation again. So I want you guys to stick 35 00:01:58,080 --> 00:02:00,360 Speaker 2: around because some of you are new listeners and probably 36 00:02:00,360 --> 00:02:02,720 Speaker 2: missed it. Some of y'all may be old listeners and 37 00:02:02,760 --> 00:02:06,600 Speaker 2: still missed it. Either way it goes. This conversation is important. 38 00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:09,480 Speaker 2: I want to share it again with all of you. So, 39 00:02:10,040 --> 00:02:12,320 Speaker 2: without further ado, let's go ahead and take it to 40 00:02:12,400 --> 00:02:19,640 Speaker 2: the next level. So this might be maybe a dumb 41 00:02:19,720 --> 00:02:23,680 Speaker 2: question considering that you were an athlete, and no questions 42 00:02:23,720 --> 00:02:27,440 Speaker 2: obviously things that we all assume that you put at 43 00:02:27,440 --> 00:02:29,240 Speaker 2: the table. This is what I gotta do. And I 44 00:02:29,280 --> 00:02:32,160 Speaker 2: think one of those things for an athlete is, obviously 45 00:02:32,160 --> 00:02:33,840 Speaker 2: when you play it in the professional league, your goal 46 00:02:33,880 --> 00:02:35,800 Speaker 2: is to win a championship every year. That's the goal. 47 00:02:35,919 --> 00:02:39,320 Speaker 2: Win a championship every year. That's it. That's it, which 48 00:02:39,400 --> 00:02:44,480 Speaker 2: y'all did for the first floor. But I'm curious to 49 00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:49,280 Speaker 2: know if there was ever an instance in which you 50 00:02:50,360 --> 00:02:54,200 Speaker 2: wanted to accomplish something so much that you put so 51 00:02:54,320 --> 00:02:57,640 Speaker 2: much pressure on yourself to get this thing done and 52 00:02:57,720 --> 00:03:00,440 Speaker 2: whatever that was, did you or did you not do it? 53 00:03:00,680 --> 00:03:04,000 Speaker 3: So we talked before we started recording, you and I 54 00:03:04,160 --> 00:03:05,040 Speaker 3: and I just said. 55 00:03:04,919 --> 00:03:08,440 Speaker 1: This conversation today is one that even I didn't realize 56 00:03:08,480 --> 00:03:12,040 Speaker 1: I need it, but I do. So I'm gonna tell 57 00:03:12,080 --> 00:03:15,200 Speaker 1: you now because you always coming at me for shedding tears, 58 00:03:15,840 --> 00:03:24,600 Speaker 1: but I'm probably gonna shed a few today because I like, 59 00:03:24,800 --> 00:03:28,720 Speaker 1: right now where I am in my life, I'm like, 60 00:03:29,120 --> 00:03:31,680 Speaker 1: what goals am I really. 61 00:03:31,480 --> 00:03:34,120 Speaker 3: Trying to achieve right now? 62 00:03:34,680 --> 00:03:37,560 Speaker 1: And by that I mean for me, not what everybody 63 00:03:37,640 --> 00:03:41,680 Speaker 1: else is telling me I should do or thinks I 64 00:03:41,720 --> 00:03:42,840 Speaker 1: should be doing right now. 65 00:03:43,320 --> 00:03:45,880 Speaker 3: So I'm in a space t Honestly, I'm gonna be. 66 00:03:45,840 --> 00:03:48,760 Speaker 1: Very vulnerable with you today, Kay, of course, I'm in 67 00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:55,640 Speaker 1: a space right now where honestly I'm like, what the fuck, Like, 68 00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,400 Speaker 1: where am I going? 69 00:03:57,920 --> 00:04:01,360 Speaker 3: Where am I headed? What's next for me? 70 00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:05,440 Speaker 1: And some people may say, well, you're fifty three so 71 00:04:05,560 --> 00:04:08,160 Speaker 1: year old, right, and I'm like, I don't feel old, 72 00:04:08,200 --> 00:04:09,640 Speaker 1: But I feel like I'm at a point in my 73 00:04:09,760 --> 00:04:11,080 Speaker 1: life though, where. 74 00:04:13,680 --> 00:04:15,520 Speaker 3: I'm not really sure. 75 00:04:15,560 --> 00:04:18,280 Speaker 1: What's next for me, and I don't know if that's 76 00:04:18,320 --> 00:04:23,320 Speaker 1: good or if it's bad. But to answer your question, 77 00:04:23,880 --> 00:04:26,480 Speaker 1: I put a whole lot of pressure on myself when 78 00:04:26,480 --> 00:04:28,839 Speaker 1: I was playing and when I was pregnant, and that 79 00:04:28,960 --> 00:04:34,200 Speaker 1: pressure wasn't just to come back and be great and 80 00:04:34,240 --> 00:04:38,599 Speaker 1: play basketball and do the things that people saw me 81 00:04:38,680 --> 00:04:41,000 Speaker 1: do or knew me for as far as a basketball player, 82 00:04:41,120 --> 00:04:43,640 Speaker 1: I put pressure on myself to be the best mom 83 00:04:44,080 --> 00:04:47,559 Speaker 1: and athlete I could be because it hadn't really been done, 84 00:04:47,760 --> 00:04:50,840 Speaker 1: at least in women's basketball, and there was no one 85 00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:52,760 Speaker 1: that I could look at and say, oh, this is 86 00:04:52,800 --> 00:04:56,840 Speaker 1: how she did it. So for me, being like the 87 00:04:56,920 --> 00:05:00,760 Speaker 1: first one to walk that path, there were times where 88 00:05:00,800 --> 00:05:04,440 Speaker 1: I was like, shit, am I doing this right? Should 89 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:08,440 Speaker 1: I stop doing all the things to be a great 90 00:05:08,480 --> 00:05:11,000 Speaker 1: basketball player and focus more on being a great mom. 91 00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:12,960 Speaker 1: There was a lot of guilt that came with that. 92 00:05:13,080 --> 00:05:15,040 Speaker 1: There was a lot of pressure I put on myself. 93 00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:16,719 Speaker 1: I don't know, like I don't have all the shit 94 00:05:16,800 --> 00:05:17,360 Speaker 1: figured out. 95 00:05:17,480 --> 00:05:19,640 Speaker 3: I still don't. I did then and I still don't. 96 00:05:20,120 --> 00:05:21,480 Speaker 3: But I do think we as. 97 00:05:21,360 --> 00:05:26,080 Speaker 1: Women put that type of pressure on ourselves when we're 98 00:05:26,120 --> 00:05:28,960 Speaker 1: trying to figure out like our goals. 99 00:05:28,640 --> 00:05:30,039 Speaker 3: And what do we want to achieve and what do 100 00:05:30,080 --> 00:05:31,120 Speaker 3: we want to accomplish. 101 00:05:31,240 --> 00:05:35,480 Speaker 1: Last thing, I'll say, I took your advice our last episode. 102 00:05:35,520 --> 00:05:37,159 Speaker 3: I think we talked about a vision board. 103 00:05:37,640 --> 00:05:43,360 Speaker 1: Yes, And so for me, that vision board has really 104 00:05:43,440 --> 00:05:47,919 Speaker 1: put things into better perspective for me than actually just 105 00:05:47,960 --> 00:05:49,080 Speaker 1: writing down goals. 106 00:05:49,279 --> 00:05:52,400 Speaker 2: If that makes yes, it does, it makes tons of sense. 107 00:05:52,480 --> 00:05:56,200 Speaker 2: And you really hit on so many different things because 108 00:05:56,640 --> 00:05:57,040 Speaker 2: I had. 109 00:05:56,960 --> 00:05:58,800 Speaker 3: On my out because it's gonna be one. 110 00:05:58,680 --> 00:06:01,200 Speaker 2: Of It's gonna be one of them, and that's cool, 111 00:06:01,240 --> 00:06:03,000 Speaker 2: Like I love that. I love that about us, that 112 00:06:03,040 --> 00:06:05,520 Speaker 2: we can be vulnerable and really just be honest about 113 00:06:05,520 --> 00:06:08,240 Speaker 2: where we are and what we're doing. And I always 114 00:06:08,320 --> 00:06:11,880 Speaker 2: do a lot of I'm a documentary nrdive research person. 115 00:06:11,960 --> 00:06:16,800 Speaker 2: That's just my thing. And even before I thought that 116 00:06:16,839 --> 00:06:18,480 Speaker 2: this would be a great episode for us to do. 117 00:06:18,560 --> 00:06:21,960 Speaker 2: I was already looking and following this woman named Stacy 118 00:06:22,040 --> 00:06:26,279 Speaker 2: Kim and she's a psychologist, and so she was talking 119 00:06:26,320 --> 00:06:28,720 Speaker 2: about some tips and some things that we do as 120 00:06:28,800 --> 00:06:30,719 Speaker 2: women as it relates the goal setting that we could 121 00:06:30,760 --> 00:06:33,760 Speaker 2: do better. And so one of the things, and I 122 00:06:33,800 --> 00:06:35,560 Speaker 2: really want to talk about some of these things that 123 00:06:35,640 --> 00:06:38,600 Speaker 2: she listed, but one of the things that she did 124 00:06:38,760 --> 00:06:41,440 Speaker 2: was she gave us some numbers. And I looked at 125 00:06:41,480 --> 00:06:43,320 Speaker 2: these numbers and I was like, boy, when I think 126 00:06:43,320 --> 00:06:45,760 Speaker 2: about the shit that I did at this age, this 127 00:06:45,839 --> 00:06:49,760 Speaker 2: is what our problem is. So you're talking about being 128 00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:53,480 Speaker 2: a mom. We have been conditioned to think that as women, 129 00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:56,240 Speaker 2: we gotta do shit when other people think we need 130 00:06:56,279 --> 00:07:00,320 Speaker 2: to do them. So, depending on your cultural background, or 131 00:07:00,360 --> 00:07:02,760 Speaker 2: your family background, or wherever you are, my mother was 132 00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:06,159 Speaker 2: fifteen when she had me, sixteen when she had my brother, 133 00:07:06,720 --> 00:07:09,520 Speaker 2: nineteen when she had my younger sister, and it just 134 00:07:09,600 --> 00:07:11,640 Speaker 2: kept going and go. By twenty years old, woman, you 135 00:07:11,720 --> 00:07:14,600 Speaker 2: had three children. But you're looking at me a lot 136 00:07:14,760 --> 00:07:19,880 Speaker 2: at the age of twenty three and saying, oh my god, Tarika, 137 00:07:20,000 --> 00:07:22,560 Speaker 2: when do you plan on having kids? Ma'am? 138 00:07:22,760 --> 00:07:24,840 Speaker 3: I'm twenty three. 139 00:07:25,400 --> 00:07:30,400 Speaker 2: Allow me to live to figure it out that in mind. 140 00:07:30,480 --> 00:07:33,679 Speaker 2: I looked at the average age of parenthood in twenty 141 00:07:33,720 --> 00:07:38,960 Speaker 2: twenty four, and according to the statistics, in twenty twenty four, 142 00:07:39,160 --> 00:07:43,720 Speaker 2: the average woman having her first child is twenty eight 143 00:07:43,800 --> 00:07:46,600 Speaker 2: years old. Then I continue to dig a little bit more, 144 00:07:47,040 --> 00:07:49,960 Speaker 2: and I said, how old are people getting married now? 145 00:07:50,160 --> 00:07:52,840 Speaker 2: Because that's another thing women get pressured to do. If 146 00:07:52,840 --> 00:07:55,000 Speaker 2: you ain't married by such and such age, you might 147 00:07:55,040 --> 00:07:57,840 Speaker 2: as well be a spinster out here in the street. Okay, 148 00:07:58,040 --> 00:08:01,600 Speaker 2: let's look. I did some more, and I see that 149 00:08:01,680 --> 00:08:04,760 Speaker 2: the average age of women getting married in twenty twenty 150 00:08:04,800 --> 00:08:07,320 Speaker 2: four is twenty eight years old, which is up from 151 00:08:07,360 --> 00:08:10,400 Speaker 2: twenty years old in the nineteen fifties. So as I'm 152 00:08:10,440 --> 00:08:13,320 Speaker 2: starting to look at these numbers, I'm looking at careers 153 00:08:13,440 --> 00:08:16,320 Speaker 2: because what's another thing. Oh my god, I'm thirty. I 154 00:08:16,480 --> 00:08:20,360 Speaker 2: don't have a career yet. I'm going through a midlife crisis. 155 00:08:20,640 --> 00:08:24,080 Speaker 2: Look at the numbers. The average age of people actually 156 00:08:24,160 --> 00:08:27,560 Speaker 2: settling into their careers are between the ages of thirty 157 00:08:27,560 --> 00:08:31,400 Speaker 2: five and forty one. So it's okay to be young 158 00:08:31,560 --> 00:08:33,800 Speaker 2: and not have it figured out. So what does this 159 00:08:33,920 --> 00:08:37,160 Speaker 2: make me think? Cheryl is like we spend too much 160 00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:40,920 Speaker 2: time trying to set goals based on what we think 161 00:08:41,080 --> 00:08:44,840 Speaker 2: other people think we should be doing, and not really 162 00:08:44,840 --> 00:08:49,719 Speaker 2: paying attention to what we should be doing. It's difficult 163 00:08:49,920 --> 00:08:52,040 Speaker 2: when you think about, like, how do I set goals 164 00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:53,839 Speaker 2: for me or how do I do shit for me? 165 00:08:54,400 --> 00:08:56,920 Speaker 2: When all I've been taught this whole time is what 166 00:08:57,000 --> 00:08:59,280 Speaker 2: everybody else think I'm supposed to be doing by a 167 00:08:59,320 --> 00:09:01,560 Speaker 2: certain time, a certain age when I get to a 168 00:09:01,600 --> 00:09:02,600 Speaker 2: certain place. 169 00:09:02,640 --> 00:09:04,720 Speaker 3: Like damn, what the fuck let me breathe? 170 00:09:05,840 --> 00:09:07,760 Speaker 2: Twenty twenty five got to be a year we breathed? 171 00:09:07,880 --> 00:09:09,079 Speaker 3: Is you said it? 172 00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:13,679 Speaker 1: I think depending on like your cultural background and your 173 00:09:13,760 --> 00:09:18,480 Speaker 1: upbringing and the way you were raised, that puts a 174 00:09:18,480 --> 00:09:21,240 Speaker 1: lot of things into perspective, right, I said on the 175 00:09:21,320 --> 00:09:23,880 Speaker 1: last episode it talked about my son getting ready to 176 00:09:23,920 --> 00:09:27,640 Speaker 1: have a kid. He's twenty seven, so I'm not tripping 177 00:09:27,760 --> 00:09:28,480 Speaker 1: on the age. 178 00:09:29,160 --> 00:09:34,880 Speaker 3: But she's twenty three, so I am tripping on the age. Right. 179 00:09:35,040 --> 00:09:37,400 Speaker 1: So when you brought that up, I was just like wow, 180 00:09:37,600 --> 00:09:41,000 Speaker 1: because that was my first thought was you haven't lived. 181 00:09:41,559 --> 00:09:44,320 Speaker 1: Y'all haven't lived, And when you get ready to bring 182 00:09:44,360 --> 00:09:46,720 Speaker 1: a child into this world, I don't care what age 183 00:09:46,720 --> 00:09:47,080 Speaker 1: you are. 184 00:09:47,720 --> 00:09:49,880 Speaker 3: Shit changes. You go from. 185 00:09:49,679 --> 00:09:53,800 Speaker 1: Being first to last, yep, when a child comes into 186 00:09:53,800 --> 00:09:57,000 Speaker 1: the picture. But the thing that I really want us 187 00:09:57,040 --> 00:10:00,760 Speaker 1: as women, and not just Black women, women in general, Like, 188 00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:04,680 Speaker 1: I really want us to take charge of who we 189 00:10:04,880 --> 00:10:08,079 Speaker 1: are and being who we are the way we want 190 00:10:08,080 --> 00:10:11,960 Speaker 1: to be that right, not the way society says we 191 00:10:12,000 --> 00:10:15,200 Speaker 1: should be, Not the way your parents say you should be. Like, 192 00:10:16,040 --> 00:10:19,560 Speaker 1: we've got to get to a point to where we're 193 00:10:19,679 --> 00:10:22,400 Speaker 1: okay with it. If I choose not to get married 194 00:10:22,480 --> 00:10:25,880 Speaker 1: until I'm fifty years old, damn it, that's my choice. 195 00:10:26,160 --> 00:10:29,400 Speaker 2: That's your choice. Yes, maybe I haven't. 196 00:10:29,559 --> 00:10:31,280 Speaker 3: Maybe I haven't found the right person. 197 00:10:31,840 --> 00:10:34,600 Speaker 1: And who are you to tell me that I have 198 00:10:34,679 --> 00:10:37,240 Speaker 1: to be married by a certain age or else. The 199 00:10:37,320 --> 00:10:40,920 Speaker 1: other thing is you talk about the age where women 200 00:10:41,000 --> 00:10:45,040 Speaker 1: have kids. Maybe some women don't want to have kids, 201 00:10:45,480 --> 00:10:50,280 Speaker 1: and that's okay too, Yep, it's okay to be childless, 202 00:10:50,320 --> 00:10:51,960 Speaker 1: cat ladies, right right. 203 00:10:52,280 --> 00:10:54,000 Speaker 3: I know I'm not gonna go To'm not gonna go there. 204 00:10:54,520 --> 00:10:58,319 Speaker 1: But there's so much pressure that's put on us from society, 205 00:10:58,480 --> 00:11:03,120 Speaker 1: from even friends, right that says, here's who we have 206 00:11:03,240 --> 00:11:05,120 Speaker 1: to be, the way we have to be when we 207 00:11:05,200 --> 00:11:07,439 Speaker 1: have to be it, And no we don't. 208 00:11:08,000 --> 00:11:11,199 Speaker 2: We truly don't at all. And it's okay to be 209 00:11:11,280 --> 00:11:13,720 Speaker 2: the first to set a different trend in your family. 210 00:11:13,960 --> 00:11:16,160 Speaker 2: For everybody else in your family getting married at twenty 211 00:11:16,160 --> 00:11:18,120 Speaker 2: two to twenty three, baby, it's okay to wait till 212 00:11:18,120 --> 00:11:20,880 Speaker 2: you thirty five. You ain't got to follow the tradition. 213 00:11:21,200 --> 00:11:24,960 Speaker 2: That's how you break the cycle. It's absolutely one, absolutely 214 00:11:25,760 --> 00:11:29,480 Speaker 2: the cycle. And so when I said earlier that the 215 00:11:29,520 --> 00:11:31,640 Speaker 2: reason why sometimes we don't meet our goals is because 216 00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:33,640 Speaker 2: we go sett and wrong. We go setting wrong, we 217 00:11:33,760 --> 00:11:35,480 Speaker 2: setting goals for the wrong thing. 218 00:11:35,800 --> 00:11:37,800 Speaker 3: We look in we're setting goals for other people. 219 00:11:38,160 --> 00:11:42,240 Speaker 1: We're studying the setting goals people, our lives yah other people. 220 00:11:42,440 --> 00:11:46,480 Speaker 2: And based on other people's ideas or what we're supposed 221 00:11:46,480 --> 00:11:48,400 Speaker 2: to do or how we're supposed to act. We got 222 00:11:48,400 --> 00:11:50,280 Speaker 2: to cut that out. So some of the things that 223 00:11:50,320 --> 00:11:54,320 Speaker 2: Stacy says that I truly love is one, pick one 224 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,320 Speaker 2: goal to focus on, and then two, let that goal 225 00:11:57,440 --> 00:12:00,880 Speaker 2: be a want rather than I have to or I should. 226 00:12:01,360 --> 00:12:03,720 Speaker 2: And I love that. I like that right that we 227 00:12:03,800 --> 00:12:06,720 Speaker 2: can definitely walk in chew gum at the same time. 228 00:12:06,800 --> 00:12:11,079 Speaker 2: So that doesn't necessarily mean we're incapable of having more 229 00:12:11,120 --> 00:12:14,000 Speaker 2: than one goal, but at the same time the one 230 00:12:14,040 --> 00:12:16,880 Speaker 2: that you focus on, let that be your one, and 231 00:12:16,920 --> 00:12:21,280 Speaker 2: then do smaller tasks to get to that one goal. 232 00:12:21,360 --> 00:12:23,720 Speaker 2: So you got long term and short term, which makes sense. 233 00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:26,720 Speaker 2: For example, my goal was to buy a house. Little 234 00:12:26,720 --> 00:12:28,160 Speaker 2: things I had to do to make sure that I 235 00:12:28,200 --> 00:12:31,640 Speaker 2: could do that, save my money, pay down my debt, 236 00:12:31,840 --> 00:12:35,280 Speaker 2: find a realtor, cut back on shopping. But the ultimate 237 00:12:35,360 --> 00:12:38,000 Speaker 2: goal was to do this thing right. One of the 238 00:12:38,040 --> 00:12:40,079 Speaker 2: things that stood out to me, she has seven of them. 239 00:12:40,120 --> 00:12:42,240 Speaker 2: So one was pick a goal and focus on it. 240 00:12:42,640 --> 00:12:44,720 Speaker 2: Two would start with want to rather than I have 241 00:12:44,840 --> 00:12:48,000 Speaker 2: to or I should. But this one was interesting to me. 242 00:12:48,520 --> 00:12:53,600 Speaker 2: Focus on yourself. You can't change the behaviors of other people, 243 00:12:54,040 --> 00:12:57,040 Speaker 2: and you can't make people see you and what you 244 00:12:57,080 --> 00:12:59,040 Speaker 2: want to do the way that you want them to 245 00:12:59,080 --> 00:13:01,160 Speaker 2: see you. You just got to let them do what 246 00:13:01,200 --> 00:13:03,040 Speaker 2: they doing and be what they be in and feel 247 00:13:03,040 --> 00:13:07,000 Speaker 2: how they feel. You focus on yourself, mind your own 248 00:13:07,120 --> 00:13:10,640 Speaker 2: damn business. And so I think that is such an 249 00:13:10,640 --> 00:13:13,240 Speaker 2: important I'm telling you, like, the only thing you can 250 00:13:13,280 --> 00:13:15,160 Speaker 2: do with such jus for you, And if people ain't 251 00:13:15,200 --> 00:13:16,680 Speaker 2: rocking with you, they ain't rocking with you. 252 00:13:16,840 --> 00:13:17,040 Speaker 3: Right. 253 00:13:17,600 --> 00:13:20,400 Speaker 2: Number four she had, which I just touched on recognized 254 00:13:20,400 --> 00:13:24,160 Speaker 2: the difference between projects and tasks. So big goal and 255 00:13:24,200 --> 00:13:26,320 Speaker 2: then little things you need to do to get big goal. 256 00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:30,560 Speaker 2: And then five, which I really love too, was set 257 00:13:30,559 --> 00:13:34,360 Speaker 2: a check in point right, hold yourself accountable, put a 258 00:13:34,440 --> 00:13:35,480 Speaker 2: deadline on it. 259 00:13:35,720 --> 00:13:36,960 Speaker 3: After a couple of weeks. 260 00:13:37,360 --> 00:13:40,880 Speaker 2: Number six what I've been saying twenty twenty five is 261 00:13:41,760 --> 00:13:47,079 Speaker 2: celebrate your success. Celebrate it right instead of saying, oh, 262 00:13:47,120 --> 00:13:50,120 Speaker 2: you know, I wanted to lose fifty pounds, I only 263 00:13:50,160 --> 00:13:53,360 Speaker 2: lost twenty five. Since you lost twenty. 264 00:13:53,040 --> 00:13:57,880 Speaker 1: Five pounds, celebrated, celebrated, celebrate that shit. 265 00:13:58,640 --> 00:14:02,199 Speaker 2: But this, to me was the most important one of all. 266 00:14:02,679 --> 00:14:08,440 Speaker 2: Be flexible, abandoning goals that don't serve you well. It's 267 00:14:08,480 --> 00:14:11,200 Speaker 2: a lot of shit that looked dope in January. I 268 00:14:11,280 --> 00:14:14,080 Speaker 2: like that, and by the time you get to April, 269 00:14:14,280 --> 00:14:17,440 Speaker 2: you like, Yo, this really ain't it. That's part of 270 00:14:17,440 --> 00:14:20,280 Speaker 2: the focus on yourself. If something that you said you 271 00:14:20,320 --> 00:14:23,240 Speaker 2: want to do in January ain't really working out by April, 272 00:14:23,560 --> 00:14:26,280 Speaker 2: you ain't feeling it. It's not making you happy, it's 273 00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:29,040 Speaker 2: not serving your purpose. Don't be trying to do it 274 00:14:29,120 --> 00:14:30,240 Speaker 2: just for the sake of doing it. 275 00:14:31,080 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 1: Let that shit go just to have a conversation or 276 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:36,480 Speaker 1: for it to be a good look. And that's why 277 00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:39,280 Speaker 1: t I think I got away from making my New 278 00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:43,640 Speaker 1: Year's resolutions because every year I was, Okay, i'm gonna 279 00:14:43,680 --> 00:14:45,720 Speaker 1: work out, I'm gonna lose x amount of pounds, I'm 280 00:14:45,720 --> 00:14:48,360 Speaker 1: gonna do this, and I did it for the first month, 281 00:14:48,760 --> 00:14:52,400 Speaker 1: but then through traveling and just life right, I was 282 00:14:52,480 --> 00:14:56,560 Speaker 1: just like, shit, no, I'm done with that. But I 283 00:14:56,720 --> 00:15:01,280 Speaker 1: also think we put so much pressure on ourselves when 284 00:15:01,320 --> 00:15:04,200 Speaker 1: we kind of see what other people are doing. Your 285 00:15:04,280 --> 00:15:07,880 Speaker 1: journey's different from mine, and maybe what you're doing is 286 00:15:07,920 --> 00:15:12,320 Speaker 1: working for you. That doesn't mean that what I'm doing 287 00:15:12,400 --> 00:15:16,680 Speaker 1: is wrong. Because back to what number was it three? 288 00:15:16,840 --> 00:15:20,280 Speaker 1: Focus three on yourself. Focus on yourself. And that is 289 00:15:20,360 --> 00:15:25,520 Speaker 1: what I think we as women really need to dive 290 00:15:25,600 --> 00:15:29,440 Speaker 1: into and really focus on, is just focusing on ourselves. 291 00:15:29,720 --> 00:15:32,560 Speaker 1: I don't know whoever said in life that when you 292 00:15:32,840 --> 00:15:35,080 Speaker 1: get to a certain age that you have your life 293 00:15:35,080 --> 00:15:38,360 Speaker 1: figured out, because again, I'm fifty three and I don't 294 00:15:38,360 --> 00:15:39,520 Speaker 1: have it figured out. 295 00:15:39,960 --> 00:15:42,600 Speaker 2: No, of course not. And what's interesting is we use 296 00:15:42,640 --> 00:15:45,240 Speaker 2: the term mid life crisis all the time. So I 297 00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:47,320 Speaker 2: did a little bit of digging on that too, and 298 00:15:47,400 --> 00:15:53,680 Speaker 2: Apparently the actual range of midlife crisis happens between forty 299 00:15:53,720 --> 00:15:56,480 Speaker 2: five and sixty. So I'm sorry if you're listening and 300 00:15:56,520 --> 00:15:58,600 Speaker 2: you're thirty and you think you're going through a mid 301 00:15:58,640 --> 00:16:00,720 Speaker 2: life crisis because you can read waiting from school with 302 00:16:00,880 --> 00:16:04,000 Speaker 2: your degree and unfortunately you haven't found a job of 303 00:16:04,080 --> 00:16:06,880 Speaker 2: your career yet and now you're in a one bedroom 304 00:16:07,080 --> 00:16:09,360 Speaker 2: or a studio apartment. In life is coming to an 305 00:16:09,440 --> 00:16:13,160 Speaker 2: end unless you plan on kicking the bucket naturally at sixty, sweetheart, 306 00:16:13,160 --> 00:16:15,240 Speaker 2: you are not in a midlife crisis. You are doing 307 00:16:15,480 --> 00:16:17,920 Speaker 2: an average twenty nine thirty year old person has to 308 00:16:17,960 --> 00:16:22,400 Speaker 2: go through it is It is sorry, but usually it 309 00:16:22,480 --> 00:16:27,200 Speaker 2: is said that midlife crisises usually happen between forty five 310 00:16:27,240 --> 00:16:31,560 Speaker 2: and sixty after a significant life change like a divorce, 311 00:16:31,760 --> 00:16:36,040 Speaker 2: a retirement, a death of a loved one, aging, something 312 00:16:36,080 --> 00:16:41,200 Speaker 2: where you significantly shift because you think you don't know 313 00:16:41,280 --> 00:16:46,200 Speaker 2: your purpose. And I thought that was interesting because I 314 00:16:46,200 --> 00:16:50,760 Speaker 2: could totally understand someone who had been a director for 315 00:16:50,800 --> 00:16:54,240 Speaker 2: thirty years and at the age of fifty five, they're 316 00:16:54,280 --> 00:16:57,360 Speaker 2: no longer a director and they've decided to retire, and 317 00:16:57,400 --> 00:17:00,240 Speaker 2: now they're like, now, what what is my purpose now? Like, 318 00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:03,200 Speaker 2: how do I make an impact? It sounded good to retire, 319 00:17:03,280 --> 00:17:06,399 Speaker 2: it sounded good to not work, but like, now, what's 320 00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:11,040 Speaker 2: my goal? What's my thing? I could see that more 321 00:17:11,119 --> 00:17:15,240 Speaker 2: than just I didn't make or reach the societal norm 322 00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:18,560 Speaker 2: that folks put upon me. And because I didn't make it, 323 00:17:18,600 --> 00:17:20,920 Speaker 2: I didn't reach it. I didn't do that thing. Life 324 00:17:20,960 --> 00:17:24,639 Speaker 2: is falling apart. Those are not the same. And the 325 00:17:24,680 --> 00:17:28,200 Speaker 2: thing about that is I have to ask myself sometimes 326 00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:29,160 Speaker 2: when I be going. 327 00:17:28,960 --> 00:17:31,280 Speaker 3: Through this, do men have to go through that shit? 328 00:17:32,480 --> 00:17:36,840 Speaker 2: Because while men have their own set of pressures, it 329 00:17:36,920 --> 00:17:39,800 Speaker 2: is very different than the set of societal pressures that 330 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:43,199 Speaker 2: women have. You talked about it's pressure that you felt 331 00:17:43,640 --> 00:17:46,480 Speaker 2: having to be an athlete and be a good mom. 332 00:17:46,880 --> 00:17:49,200 Speaker 2: Do you know how many daddy's in the NBA ain't 333 00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:55,200 Speaker 2: thought a sure thing about missing a birthday, missing a Christmas, 334 00:17:55,600 --> 00:17:58,359 Speaker 2: not being able. I'm sure they would love to be there, 335 00:17:58,560 --> 00:18:01,119 Speaker 2: but I don't see not a single column being written 336 00:18:01,560 --> 00:18:04,280 Speaker 2: or any of the thick pieces coming out about how 337 00:18:04,320 --> 00:18:07,240 Speaker 2: they are terrible fathers because they have to be in 338 00:18:07,320 --> 00:18:09,600 Speaker 2: the NBA from October to June. 339 00:18:10,000 --> 00:18:12,680 Speaker 3: Do what it says is they have to do their job. 340 00:18:12,960 --> 00:18:14,720 Speaker 2: They have to provide for their fai. 341 00:18:14,840 --> 00:18:17,800 Speaker 3: Yeah, that's their job is to be a professional athlete. 342 00:18:18,040 --> 00:18:21,880 Speaker 3: That's right. Unfortunately they can't be there, and. 343 00:18:22,040 --> 00:18:25,399 Speaker 2: Spouses are expected to understand Listen, that was the person 344 00:18:25,440 --> 00:18:27,959 Speaker 2: that you got with, when you got with them, those 345 00:18:28,080 --> 00:18:32,600 Speaker 2: pressures don't apply to men, So why the hell do 346 00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:35,320 Speaker 2: we keep letting those type of pressures rule and feed 347 00:18:35,400 --> 00:18:38,719 Speaker 2: our lives. The numbers are showing women are starting to 348 00:18:38,720 --> 00:18:40,760 Speaker 2: wise up a little bit and be like, I ain't 349 00:18:40,760 --> 00:18:42,160 Speaker 2: got a rush to do this shit. 350 00:18:42,280 --> 00:18:44,520 Speaker 1: Because here's what happens a lot of times. Let's just 351 00:18:44,560 --> 00:18:47,679 Speaker 1: go back to the whole marriage thing. Lots of times 352 00:18:48,000 --> 00:18:53,000 Speaker 1: when you think you found the right one, and yes, 353 00:18:53,160 --> 00:18:55,960 Speaker 1: it happens, it works. But just say, I'm going to 354 00:18:56,119 --> 00:18:59,400 Speaker 1: use my son and his girlfriend for an example. Right, 355 00:18:59,440 --> 00:19:03,320 Speaker 1: my son's twenty seven, she's twenty three. Have they had 356 00:19:03,320 --> 00:19:04,920 Speaker 1: a discussion about marriage? 357 00:19:05,040 --> 00:19:05,439 Speaker 3: I don't know. 358 00:19:05,560 --> 00:19:08,680 Speaker 2: Not with me. That ain't your business. 359 00:19:09,240 --> 00:19:11,400 Speaker 3: That ain't my business. That is my business. 360 00:19:11,960 --> 00:19:15,040 Speaker 1: But so many times because of what society says, right, 361 00:19:15,560 --> 00:19:18,159 Speaker 1: you should be married before you have a child. And 362 00:19:18,200 --> 00:19:20,520 Speaker 1: I also know in the black culture, I know my 363 00:19:20,640 --> 00:19:22,600 Speaker 1: mama was like, oh no, you're not about to lay 364 00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:23,879 Speaker 1: up with nobody and have a baby. 365 00:19:23,920 --> 00:19:25,879 Speaker 3: You better get married first, all those things. 366 00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:30,360 Speaker 1: But to me, at the age of twenty three and twenty. 367 00:19:30,080 --> 00:19:31,719 Speaker 3: Seven, I don't think you've lived. 368 00:19:32,920 --> 00:19:39,320 Speaker 1: Also, do you really truly know what love is? It's 369 00:19:39,320 --> 00:19:41,919 Speaker 1: a question I'm asking. I don't know, but to say, 370 00:19:41,960 --> 00:19:44,440 Speaker 1: this is the person I want to marry. The only 371 00:19:44,480 --> 00:19:46,600 Speaker 1: reason why I bring that up is because I went 372 00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:50,080 Speaker 1: through a divorce. I got married when I was really young, right, 373 00:19:50,240 --> 00:19:53,560 Speaker 1: and I went through a divorce. Not saying divorces don't 374 00:19:53,600 --> 00:19:56,240 Speaker 1: happen to older couples, because they happen all the time, 375 00:19:57,400 --> 00:20:01,879 Speaker 1: but I would like to think that the younger you 376 00:20:01,960 --> 00:20:04,800 Speaker 1: get married, if you don't really truly know each other, 377 00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:11,040 Speaker 1: that's going to lead to a divorce quicker than someone 378 00:20:11,080 --> 00:20:14,760 Speaker 1: who's older. My husband and I we were engaged for 379 00:20:14,840 --> 00:20:15,560 Speaker 1: ten years. 380 00:20:15,960 --> 00:20:17,920 Speaker 2: I remember you saying that. 381 00:20:19,520 --> 00:20:22,119 Speaker 1: Yeah, and I just again, I go back to the 382 00:20:22,160 --> 00:20:25,879 Speaker 1: stats you brought up, and we just have to get 383 00:20:25,960 --> 00:20:30,119 Speaker 1: out of the old ways and the old mindset of 384 00:20:30,960 --> 00:20:33,879 Speaker 1: this is who I have to be and what I 385 00:20:33,920 --> 00:20:38,080 Speaker 1: should have accomplished by the time I get a certain. 386 00:20:37,800 --> 00:20:40,879 Speaker 2: Age have to and when we come back on the 387 00:20:40,920 --> 00:20:44,240 Speaker 2: other side, I want to share a couple of things 388 00:20:44,359 --> 00:20:48,719 Speaker 2: that My girl has really laid out here that we 389 00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,880 Speaker 2: can do to help us get back on track when 390 00:20:50,880 --> 00:20:53,160 Speaker 2: we feel like we've slipped on our goals a little bit, 391 00:20:53,440 --> 00:20:56,879 Speaker 2: but also maybe how we can help each other to 392 00:20:57,400 --> 00:21:00,159 Speaker 2: stay out of that mindset of doing what society an 393 00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:02,600 Speaker 2: he thinks we should do instead of just doing. 394 00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:03,320 Speaker 3: What we like to do. 395 00:21:03,480 --> 00:21:14,399 Speaker 2: So we'll be right back after this, Cheryl. Can I 396 00:21:14,440 --> 00:21:17,560 Speaker 2: ask you if there is one I guess you can 397 00:21:17,640 --> 00:21:22,680 Speaker 2: say societal norm about women that people say about us 398 00:21:22,840 --> 00:21:25,520 Speaker 2: or place on us, or a pressure that they put 399 00:21:25,560 --> 00:21:29,119 Speaker 2: on us that you just if I had an all time. 400 00:21:29,280 --> 00:21:32,040 Speaker 2: I really hate that they say this about us. This 401 00:21:32,240 --> 00:21:32,880 Speaker 2: is that thing? 402 00:21:33,400 --> 00:21:35,280 Speaker 1: Oh yeah, you put me on the spot there because 403 00:21:35,280 --> 00:21:37,000 Speaker 1: I can say I think there are so many. 404 00:21:37,359 --> 00:21:39,120 Speaker 3: Okay, let me hear your two first. 405 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:42,680 Speaker 2: Okay, the first one that I have is about all women. 406 00:21:42,960 --> 00:21:47,040 Speaker 2: I hate that people think women are soft, Like women 407 00:21:47,119 --> 00:21:50,240 Speaker 2: are soft, like we're supposed to be soft. So to 408 00:21:50,320 --> 00:21:52,440 Speaker 2: make that an insult is like, what the fuck does 409 00:21:52,480 --> 00:21:53,960 Speaker 2: that mean? We're supposed to be soft? 410 00:21:54,280 --> 00:21:54,520 Speaker 3: Yeah? 411 00:21:54,560 --> 00:21:58,080 Speaker 2: But I don't mean like cute, cuddly sauce. I mean 412 00:21:58,280 --> 00:22:03,000 Speaker 2: like the we can't handle trials because what you mean 413 00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:05,399 Speaker 2: or if you're talking to a man and you'd be like, oh, 414 00:22:05,400 --> 00:22:07,440 Speaker 2: you're putting up a girl, Like, what the fuck that means? 415 00:22:07,480 --> 00:22:07,600 Speaker 2: You know? 416 00:22:08,400 --> 00:22:09,840 Speaker 3: Yeah, I hate yeah, yeah. 417 00:22:09,880 --> 00:22:12,520 Speaker 2: And it's like one A and one B. That leads 418 00:22:12,560 --> 00:22:14,760 Speaker 2: me to number two, which is more for black women, 419 00:22:15,280 --> 00:22:18,760 Speaker 2: and that is that we're aggressive. Don't call me aggressive 420 00:22:19,000 --> 00:22:21,439 Speaker 2: because I don't take your bullshit, because I stand up 421 00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:23,959 Speaker 2: for myself. Because I'm assertive because I learned how to 422 00:22:24,040 --> 00:22:26,600 Speaker 2: use the English language correctly and I use it for 423 00:22:26,880 --> 00:22:31,760 Speaker 2: my benefit when necessary. That means I'm aggressive and I'm angry. 424 00:22:32,480 --> 00:22:34,720 Speaker 2: I don't like that. Those are my two. I hate 425 00:22:34,760 --> 00:22:38,920 Speaker 2: that society has those stereotypes around us. 426 00:22:38,960 --> 00:22:40,720 Speaker 3: I mean those are two good ones, because I would 427 00:22:40,760 --> 00:22:41,960 Speaker 3: definitely agree with you on that. 428 00:22:42,160 --> 00:22:45,160 Speaker 1: I think one for me is I just hate when 429 00:22:45,280 --> 00:22:50,399 Speaker 1: men say, oh, she's a woman, Like I hate that 430 00:22:50,480 --> 00:22:53,120 Speaker 1: because I'm like, what does that mean? Yes, I am 431 00:22:53,160 --> 00:22:55,359 Speaker 1: a woman, I'm gonna forever be a woman. What is 432 00:22:55,400 --> 00:22:55,840 Speaker 1: your point? 433 00:22:55,920 --> 00:22:56,560 Speaker 3: Because there are. 434 00:22:56,400 --> 00:22:58,920 Speaker 1: Times where my husband and I are having a conversation 435 00:22:59,600 --> 00:23:02,280 Speaker 1: and sometimes he'll say, well, she's a woman, and I'm like, 436 00:23:02,520 --> 00:23:03,560 Speaker 1: what the fuck does that mean? 437 00:23:04,280 --> 00:23:05,400 Speaker 3: I am too? 438 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,360 Speaker 1: So if you feel that way about her and she's 439 00:23:08,400 --> 00:23:10,680 Speaker 1: a woman, then you feel that way about me, and 440 00:23:11,640 --> 00:23:14,399 Speaker 1: I think the other one for me, tea would be 441 00:23:14,720 --> 00:23:16,439 Speaker 1: And this is going to take me back to the 442 00:23:16,480 --> 00:23:24,919 Speaker 1: election where we society doesn't feel like a woman is 443 00:23:25,080 --> 00:23:28,240 Speaker 1: capable of running a country. Because there are a lot 444 00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:31,840 Speaker 1: of different reasons why Kamala didn't win, but one that 445 00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:35,320 Speaker 1: I heard was, oh, my goodness, I would never vote 446 00:23:35,359 --> 00:23:37,920 Speaker 1: for a woman to lead us to run this country. 447 00:23:38,640 --> 00:23:42,760 Speaker 1: And that bothers the shit out of me because I 448 00:23:42,880 --> 00:23:46,800 Speaker 1: know for a fact there are women out there in this. 449 00:23:46,760 --> 00:23:51,760 Speaker 3: World that are way better at running shit than men are. 450 00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:56,919 Speaker 1: Yep. But that's where we as women have to stand 451 00:23:57,000 --> 00:23:59,720 Speaker 1: up and hold our ground and say, listen, I am 452 00:23:59,760 --> 00:24:02,399 Speaker 1: a proud to be one, but let me tell you 453 00:24:02,480 --> 00:24:03,159 Speaker 1: why I can. 454 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:04,720 Speaker 3: Do this job better than you. 455 00:24:04,800 --> 00:24:06,960 Speaker 1: Matter of fact, let me show you why I can 456 00:24:07,000 --> 00:24:08,720 Speaker 1: do this job better than you, not just tell you 457 00:24:08,720 --> 00:24:10,199 Speaker 1: my mom you say I can show you better than 458 00:24:10,200 --> 00:24:10,840 Speaker 1: I can tell you. 459 00:24:11,840 --> 00:24:14,520 Speaker 2: Yeah, that reminds me of I forgot what podcast I 460 00:24:14,560 --> 00:24:17,640 Speaker 2: was listening to, but someone had mentioned that women get 461 00:24:17,720 --> 00:24:20,040 Speaker 2: jobs based on their track record. They have to prove 462 00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:23,000 Speaker 2: that they can do it, whereas men get a job 463 00:24:23,119 --> 00:24:24,119 Speaker 2: or get an opportunity. 464 00:24:24,160 --> 00:24:27,120 Speaker 3: Because I could see the potential soldier. 465 00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:29,200 Speaker 2: I can see how much I could see you look 466 00:24:29,280 --> 00:24:32,160 Speaker 2: like the kind of guy who is going You're going places, 467 00:24:32,320 --> 00:24:36,359 Speaker 2: even in relationships, right, even in relationships, you look at 468 00:24:36,400 --> 00:24:38,400 Speaker 2: a woman and you be like, I want to get 469 00:24:38,440 --> 00:24:40,440 Speaker 2: with that woman because that woman got it going on. 470 00:24:40,520 --> 00:24:43,120 Speaker 2: She's got a great job, she's got a college education. 471 00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:45,240 Speaker 2: You look at a man and you'll be like, yeah, 472 00:24:45,320 --> 00:24:47,959 Speaker 2: I know he only got a g DA working at 473 00:24:48,040 --> 00:24:52,120 Speaker 2: McDonald's right now, but guess what, I could see him 474 00:24:52,160 --> 00:24:55,840 Speaker 2: going places. And then it's twenty years later and you 475 00:24:55,880 --> 00:24:58,040 Speaker 2: are here calling this man a bum, but you saw 476 00:24:58,119 --> 00:25:02,399 Speaker 2: him going places twenty not having a GED or working 477 00:25:02,440 --> 00:25:05,800 Speaker 2: at McDonald's. So I wasn't trying nothing at all. Say 478 00:25:05,920 --> 00:25:09,080 Speaker 2: nothing wrong with that. I'm just saying, be accepting of 479 00:25:09,119 --> 00:25:12,520 Speaker 2: what you got in front of you and talking about potential. 480 00:25:12,600 --> 00:25:16,600 Speaker 2: But I bring all that up because Stacey continues to 481 00:25:16,680 --> 00:25:20,840 Speaker 2: talk about sometimes women we set goals based on what 482 00:25:20,880 --> 00:25:25,120 Speaker 2: we think is achievable for us, because people have already 483 00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:30,040 Speaker 2: decided what's achievable for women and what's not. Example, being 484 00:25:30,119 --> 00:25:33,920 Speaker 2: president of the United States. It has already been proven 485 00:25:34,160 --> 00:25:38,200 Speaker 2: in other countries that women can absolutely be world leaders. 486 00:25:38,440 --> 00:25:41,600 Speaker 2: But for whatever reason, in the United States, there is 487 00:25:41,640 --> 00:25:45,439 Speaker 2: still this societal norm that women can't be president because 488 00:25:45,440 --> 00:25:49,359 Speaker 2: we've seen three women try four Technically, Shirley CHISHLM didn't 489 00:25:49,359 --> 00:25:54,000 Speaker 2: make it, Hillary clam did make it, Kamala Harris didn't 490 00:25:54,200 --> 00:25:56,920 Speaker 2: make it. So some of the things that I love 491 00:25:57,040 --> 00:25:59,760 Speaker 2: that she says is that there are some really countering 492 00:25:59,800 --> 00:26:02,760 Speaker 2: to ways to just get people out of your brink. 493 00:26:03,000 --> 00:26:04,920 Speaker 2: You touched on one of them. One of the things 494 00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:08,119 Speaker 2: she says is keeping it to yourself. Right, Sometimes you 495 00:26:08,160 --> 00:26:09,800 Speaker 2: want to tell people what it is that you want 496 00:26:09,800 --> 00:26:12,360 Speaker 2: to do, and you get those people around you who 497 00:26:12,400 --> 00:26:15,080 Speaker 2: just aren't supportive, even esther when she was like, I 498 00:26:15,160 --> 00:26:17,080 Speaker 2: was asking people should I quit my job, and they 499 00:26:17,119 --> 00:26:21,280 Speaker 2: were all like, girl, no, you crazy. If every single 500 00:26:21,320 --> 00:26:24,560 Speaker 2: time you want to do something and somebody is there 501 00:26:24,640 --> 00:26:27,639 Speaker 2: behind you to try to tell you don't do it, 502 00:26:27,800 --> 00:26:31,520 Speaker 2: you know what, you need to preserve your energy and 503 00:26:31,640 --> 00:26:35,080 Speaker 2: sometimes it's just best to keep that shit to yourself. Now, 504 00:26:35,280 --> 00:26:38,000 Speaker 2: you know what, Like it's cool, I don't really need 505 00:26:38,040 --> 00:26:40,040 Speaker 2: to tell you. That. Don't mean I'm not gonna try 506 00:26:40,440 --> 00:26:43,240 Speaker 2: and do this thing. I'm just not gonna have these 507 00:26:43,520 --> 00:26:45,840 Speaker 2: people bringing this negative energy around me. 508 00:26:46,160 --> 00:26:48,240 Speaker 3: And that is huge right. 509 00:26:48,400 --> 00:26:50,840 Speaker 1: If you have your little circle and I don't even 510 00:26:50,880 --> 00:26:52,600 Speaker 1: have a circle, they got mna have an arc. 511 00:26:53,000 --> 00:26:53,920 Speaker 3: You gotta have more. 512 00:26:54,320 --> 00:26:57,840 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, because you gotta be careful with the people 513 00:26:58,359 --> 00:27:02,399 Speaker 1: you bring in that circle because lots of times those 514 00:27:02,440 --> 00:27:03,320 Speaker 1: are the people. 515 00:27:03,040 --> 00:27:05,480 Speaker 3: That will drag you down and bring you down. Because 516 00:27:05,600 --> 00:27:06,680 Speaker 3: let's just keep it real. 517 00:27:08,320 --> 00:27:11,479 Speaker 1: We talk about men not supporting us and having our 518 00:27:11,520 --> 00:27:15,400 Speaker 1: backs and all that, but Tea, as women, sometimes we 519 00:27:15,480 --> 00:27:18,959 Speaker 1: are our worst enemies. Say that shit again instead of 520 00:27:19,000 --> 00:27:22,320 Speaker 1: supporting each other, Tea, I don't want to see you succeed. 521 00:27:22,359 --> 00:27:24,280 Speaker 1: I'm gonna sit here and laugh with you right now 522 00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:26,879 Speaker 1: in your face and encourage you and say yes, girl. 523 00:27:27,520 --> 00:27:29,720 Speaker 1: But as soon as I get at the door, let 524 00:27:29,720 --> 00:27:31,840 Speaker 1: me get on my phone, let me go tell these 525 00:27:31,840 --> 00:27:34,600 Speaker 1: people this crazy Shitterterrika talking over here. 526 00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:38,320 Speaker 3: Girl, know she ain't about to do X, Y and Z. God, 527 00:27:38,400 --> 00:27:40,800 Speaker 3: I'm gonna be here with her. Let her think she can't. 528 00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:43,520 Speaker 2: Or this one right here that sometimes we do. And 529 00:27:43,560 --> 00:27:46,359 Speaker 2: we're gonna talk about accountability. We gotta have accountability for 530 00:27:46,440 --> 00:27:49,760 Speaker 2: the shit that we do. Sometimes, not me and Ryl personally, 531 00:27:49,840 --> 00:27:53,920 Speaker 2: because we ain't fake like this, but it's people who 532 00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:57,480 Speaker 2: will hear your dream and hear your idea and hear 533 00:27:57,520 --> 00:27:59,880 Speaker 2: what you trying to do. And then the next thing, 534 00:28:00,119 --> 00:28:02,320 Speaker 2: you know, ay out here pursuing and. 535 00:28:02,320 --> 00:28:04,800 Speaker 3: Doing the same shit. What and you saying what my time? 536 00:28:05,119 --> 00:28:07,880 Speaker 3: Saying on my time? You had one more time? 537 00:28:08,560 --> 00:28:10,600 Speaker 2: I told you that I was about to get ready 538 00:28:10,600 --> 00:28:13,120 Speaker 2: to go jump on this opportunity. And the next thing, 539 00:28:13,160 --> 00:28:14,800 Speaker 2: I know, you in the room trying to get on 540 00:28:14,840 --> 00:28:16,080 Speaker 2: the opportunity before me. 541 00:28:16,480 --> 00:28:18,800 Speaker 3: What type of shit is that and acting like it 542 00:28:18,840 --> 00:28:19,600 Speaker 3: was your idea. 543 00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:22,400 Speaker 2: Now they're trying to gas like you like you're crazy, 544 00:28:22,480 --> 00:28:24,840 Speaker 2: like making as sad as that is. 545 00:28:25,160 --> 00:28:27,040 Speaker 3: You gotta be very careful. 546 00:28:27,359 --> 00:28:29,840 Speaker 1: Back to Stacey's points, sometimes you gotta keep shit to 547 00:28:29,840 --> 00:28:33,680 Speaker 1: yourself because not everybody is on your team. 548 00:28:33,800 --> 00:28:35,119 Speaker 3: Sys that's facts. 549 00:28:35,359 --> 00:28:37,320 Speaker 2: Second thing she says when you got to get back 550 00:28:37,359 --> 00:28:40,160 Speaker 2: on track with your goal is sometimes it's cool to 551 00:28:40,200 --> 00:28:43,280 Speaker 2: double down on doing nothing because a lot of times 552 00:28:43,280 --> 00:28:46,480 Speaker 2: people are making seem like you know what, Oh, all 553 00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:48,480 Speaker 2: she was doing was over there standing in the corner, 554 00:28:48,920 --> 00:28:52,080 Speaker 2: or all she said she was doing was praying. You 555 00:28:52,240 --> 00:28:55,200 Speaker 2: did what I said, I was praying, Like that's a 556 00:28:55,320 --> 00:28:59,680 Speaker 2: doing nothing, that's doing this thing. Yes, thatation is something 557 00:28:59,840 --> 00:29:02,400 Speaker 2: that doing nothing. Maybe I do need to go and 558 00:29:02,440 --> 00:29:05,000 Speaker 2: take this walk around the corner to get my mind 559 00:29:05,040 --> 00:29:07,520 Speaker 2: and clear my mind. Maybe I do need to spend 560 00:29:07,520 --> 00:29:10,719 Speaker 2: an extra ten minutes in the shower because I need peace. 561 00:29:11,240 --> 00:29:14,600 Speaker 2: It's okay for me to be making my moves my 562 00:29:14,840 --> 00:29:19,400 Speaker 2: way and you not fully see or understand why I'm 563 00:29:19,480 --> 00:29:22,600 Speaker 2: moving the way that I'm moving. And I'm one who 564 00:29:22,760 --> 00:29:26,760 Speaker 2: personally loves to tell folks when I'm doing something great, 565 00:29:26,920 --> 00:29:28,960 Speaker 2: and I don't do that to be braggadocious. I do 566 00:29:29,040 --> 00:29:31,520 Speaker 2: it because I feel like it's inspiring. There's some little 567 00:29:31,520 --> 00:29:33,520 Speaker 2: girl out there from the east side of Detroit who 568 00:29:33,680 --> 00:29:36,280 Speaker 2: never thought that she could be in a certain place. 569 00:29:36,320 --> 00:29:37,720 Speaker 2: And I want to be able to be like sis. 570 00:29:37,720 --> 00:29:39,280 Speaker 2: I came from the same place you came from. 571 00:29:39,400 --> 00:29:40,600 Speaker 3: No doubt, believe me. 572 00:29:41,040 --> 00:29:44,560 Speaker 2: We can do it in here's how. But sometimes you 573 00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:46,720 Speaker 2: might not see me doing nothing and you'll be thinking 574 00:29:46,760 --> 00:29:48,760 Speaker 2: to yourself. Girl Terrika's like a whow she finna do this? 575 00:29:48,840 --> 00:29:50,960 Speaker 2: And that girl like did nothing. She ain't posting nothing, 576 00:29:50,960 --> 00:29:54,800 Speaker 2: she ain't seen nothing like Let me do nothing, because 577 00:29:54,840 --> 00:29:57,200 Speaker 2: you don't know what my nothing looks like. If my 578 00:29:57,360 --> 00:30:01,880 Speaker 2: nothing is what's giving me peace of mind to move forward, 579 00:30:02,400 --> 00:30:05,560 Speaker 2: let me do nothing it's so true. 580 00:30:06,160 --> 00:30:08,120 Speaker 3: It is. It is, Yes, it is. 581 00:30:09,120 --> 00:30:12,440 Speaker 1: And you know what, sometimes it's okay to just sit 582 00:30:12,800 --> 00:30:16,400 Speaker 1: in silence. That's it, because you know what, I'm doing 583 00:30:16,400 --> 00:30:19,360 Speaker 1: this for me, not you, and right now this. 584 00:30:19,280 --> 00:30:22,920 Speaker 3: Is what I need. I need some me time. 585 00:30:23,480 --> 00:30:27,920 Speaker 1: And in that meantime, you have no idea what I'm 586 00:30:28,080 --> 00:30:29,480 Speaker 1: doing or what I'm working on. 587 00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:33,479 Speaker 2: Yeah, And the last thing that she says before we 588 00:30:33,600 --> 00:30:36,760 Speaker 2: head this out to get back on track is to 589 00:30:37,600 --> 00:30:42,400 Speaker 2: not assume defeat. And we touched on this earlier. Sometimes 590 00:30:43,160 --> 00:30:46,480 Speaker 2: we're not really focused on the right goal right. Sometimes 591 00:30:46,560 --> 00:30:50,160 Speaker 2: we confuse the process for the endgame. Sometimes we think 592 00:30:50,200 --> 00:30:52,520 Speaker 2: we have to do A B and C in order 593 00:30:52,560 --> 00:30:54,960 Speaker 2: to get to D. Maybe doing A B and C 594 00:30:55,160 --> 00:30:57,920 Speaker 2: and how we get to D and instead of just saying, oh, 595 00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:00,000 Speaker 2: AB and C didn't work right, so I guess I'll 596 00:31:00,120 --> 00:31:03,120 Speaker 2: never get D. Switch it up. I get asked all 597 00:31:03,160 --> 00:31:07,400 Speaker 2: the time from students who are like Tea, I want 598 00:31:07,400 --> 00:31:10,840 Speaker 2: to get into sports journalism. I want to be on ESPN. 599 00:31:10,960 --> 00:31:13,200 Speaker 2: How do I do that? And I'm like, in my head, 600 00:31:13,240 --> 00:31:14,760 Speaker 2: the first thing I think is since I'm the wrong 601 00:31:14,840 --> 00:31:17,400 Speaker 2: want to ask, because I ain't got this shit figured out. 602 00:31:17,680 --> 00:31:20,000 Speaker 2: I ain't one hundred percent doing what I want to do, 603 00:31:20,160 --> 00:31:23,200 Speaker 2: just yet right, the endgame won't look the same. But 604 00:31:23,200 --> 00:31:25,400 Speaker 2: what I always end up telling folks when they ask 605 00:31:25,480 --> 00:31:29,880 Speaker 2: me that is just this is my process. Yes, this 606 00:31:30,000 --> 00:31:33,800 Speaker 2: is how I did it. How I did it, and 607 00:31:33,840 --> 00:31:37,400 Speaker 2: how you might do it. It is totally different. That 608 00:31:37,480 --> 00:31:40,959 Speaker 2: does not mean that you can't do it. It's just 609 00:31:41,120 --> 00:31:43,840 Speaker 2: it might look different for you than different for me. So, 610 00:31:44,040 --> 00:31:47,200 Speaker 2: if this is the end game, these are the traditional steps, 611 00:31:47,760 --> 00:31:51,080 Speaker 2: these are the steps I took. You figure out what 612 00:31:51,280 --> 00:31:54,920 Speaker 2: works best for you. But we just can't assume defeat. 613 00:31:55,080 --> 00:31:59,200 Speaker 1: Everybody's journey is different and it might take me longer 614 00:31:59,320 --> 00:32:01,320 Speaker 1: to get there, but I'm gonna get there. 615 00:32:01,840 --> 00:32:04,000 Speaker 3: To her point, don't assume defeat. 616 00:32:04,120 --> 00:32:07,200 Speaker 1: That's easier said than done, though, because I know for 617 00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:09,760 Speaker 1: me personally, there are times when I'm like, you know what, 618 00:32:09,840 --> 00:32:13,800 Speaker 1: I'm about to go do this and I get through 619 00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:16,360 Speaker 1: door one, just crushed it. 620 00:32:16,400 --> 00:32:18,200 Speaker 3: I get through door too, just crushed it. 621 00:32:18,400 --> 00:32:21,400 Speaker 2: Door three is just the stubber. 622 00:32:21,560 --> 00:32:22,640 Speaker 3: It just won't let me in. 623 00:32:23,480 --> 00:32:28,200 Speaker 1: So instead of me finding another way around, I just 624 00:32:28,240 --> 00:32:29,880 Speaker 1: back up and say, I guess I ain't supposed to 625 00:32:29,920 --> 00:32:34,400 Speaker 1: do that. It's easier said than done, but I love that. Yeah, 626 00:32:34,440 --> 00:32:35,760 Speaker 1: don't assume defeat. 627 00:32:36,000 --> 00:32:38,800 Speaker 2: Don't assume defeat because I know if you're a religious person. 628 00:32:39,120 --> 00:32:40,920 Speaker 2: And that was something we didn't really talk on during 629 00:32:40,920 --> 00:32:44,040 Speaker 2: this episode, but that plays a large role in some 630 00:32:44,120 --> 00:32:46,240 Speaker 2: of the goals we set in some of the reasons 631 00:32:46,280 --> 00:32:48,480 Speaker 2: why we put pressure on ourselves too, because we quick 632 00:32:48,520 --> 00:32:51,280 Speaker 2: to be like, you know, a black felk. The Bible said, yeah, well, 633 00:32:51,320 --> 00:32:53,640 Speaker 2: the Bible said no fornication either, and we ain't gonna 634 00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:55,080 Speaker 2: talk about what you was doing at nineteen. 635 00:32:55,360 --> 00:32:56,280 Speaker 3: We really want to bring. 636 00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:59,400 Speaker 2: The Bible on this. We want to bring the Bible, girl. 637 00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:02,080 Speaker 3: But work quick that we're so wach to do that. 638 00:33:02,280 --> 00:33:05,360 Speaker 1: Listen, Bible says a whole lot of things, but you're 639 00:33:05,360 --> 00:33:07,600 Speaker 1: only gonna pick out the things that you think I'm doing. 640 00:33:07,680 --> 00:33:09,080 Speaker 2: Let's talk about what you doing. 641 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:11,200 Speaker 1: Talk about what you you was dropping it like it's 642 00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:15,520 Speaker 1: hot Saturday night, but Sunday you the first one at church. Okay, anyway, 643 00:33:15,720 --> 00:33:19,080 Speaker 1: okay for going to get your glory and repent. 644 00:33:19,120 --> 00:33:21,920 Speaker 2: And I'm just saying, don't judge me for that, no. 645 00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:25,200 Speaker 1: Doubt, that's all I'm not because I'm not judging you, sis, 646 00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:27,720 Speaker 1: but I saw you you but I was witch because 647 00:33:27,720 --> 00:33:30,800 Speaker 1: I was with you, I was witch you, dropping it 648 00:33:30,920 --> 00:33:33,240 Speaker 1: like it was hot on Saturday, and I'm gonna be 649 00:33:33,320 --> 00:33:35,200 Speaker 1: with you in church on Sundays. 650 00:33:35,240 --> 00:33:36,960 Speaker 2: But he says, I'm here for me. 651 00:33:37,480 --> 00:33:39,520 Speaker 3: I ain't here to be judging you. 652 00:33:40,040 --> 00:33:44,400 Speaker 2: Yes, yes, Bible said don't drunkenness is a sin. We 653 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:45,120 Speaker 2: both walk to. 654 00:33:45,240 --> 00:33:50,520 Speaker 3: Really, what's wrong with you? Oh my God, Oh my gosh, 655 00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:53,840 Speaker 3: hear him. 656 00:33:54,160 --> 00:33:58,760 Speaker 2: It's neither here nor that, but the whole twin Yes, 657 00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:00,840 Speaker 2: it's a trip. But the whole point that I'm making 658 00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:03,240 Speaker 2: is sometimes when folks are religious, they will say that 659 00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:04,440 Speaker 2: just wasn't what. 660 00:34:04,320 --> 00:34:05,720 Speaker 3: God wants me to do. 661 00:34:06,160 --> 00:34:09,759 Speaker 2: Maybe maybe God was trying to tell you, this is 662 00:34:09,800 --> 00:34:11,120 Speaker 2: what I want you to do, but I need you 663 00:34:11,160 --> 00:34:13,960 Speaker 2: to find another way. God didn't say don't get married. 664 00:34:14,000 --> 00:34:16,640 Speaker 2: He said, don't get married to that fool you miss 665 00:34:17,400 --> 00:34:23,200 Speaker 2: ye be a ceo. He didn't want you to run 666 00:34:23,280 --> 00:34:27,800 Speaker 2: that love it? You miss it? 667 00:34:28,400 --> 00:34:39,760 Speaker 3: I love it. But it's so true. You're like, ow, anyway, 668 00:34:40,160 --> 00:34:41,879 Speaker 3: let me get off my soap. By y'all. 669 00:34:41,880 --> 00:34:43,920 Speaker 2: We're gonna be right back so we can level this 670 00:34:43,920 --> 00:34:55,600 Speaker 2: thing on. We're gonna be back, y'all. Alrin, sis man, 671 00:34:55,640 --> 00:34:58,879 Speaker 2: it's been a great show as always have a good 672 00:34:58,880 --> 00:35:01,080 Speaker 2: time chopping it up. I just feel like, you know, 673 00:35:01,160 --> 00:35:04,160 Speaker 2: moving forward, I'm going to be even more intentional than 674 00:35:04,360 --> 00:35:07,520 Speaker 2: usual about making sure that I'm in the right space 675 00:35:07,560 --> 00:35:09,840 Speaker 2: when I create whatever goals I'm setting for myself for 676 00:35:09,880 --> 00:35:13,160 Speaker 2: this year, but also that I'm very intentional about the 677 00:35:13,200 --> 00:35:15,879 Speaker 2: people I share them with the process that I take 678 00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:18,239 Speaker 2: to accomplish them, because i just want to do right 679 00:35:18,440 --> 00:35:21,239 Speaker 2: and I just want to celebrate my wins and celebrate 680 00:35:21,280 --> 00:35:23,799 Speaker 2: my friends and their wins so that we can all 681 00:35:23,840 --> 00:35:25,120 Speaker 2: really just be successful this year. 682 00:35:25,160 --> 00:35:26,879 Speaker 1: You know, I'm gonna try to do the same thing. 683 00:35:26,960 --> 00:35:30,520 Speaker 1: And we talked about this last week. New Year's resolutions, 684 00:35:30,560 --> 00:35:33,200 Speaker 1: all those things, they're just not for me anymore. And 685 00:35:33,280 --> 00:35:36,680 Speaker 1: again I'm going to go off of what you said, 686 00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:39,200 Speaker 1: what Stacy Kim said. I'm going to focus on me, 687 00:35:39,760 --> 00:35:43,360 Speaker 1: focus on all that extra shit and everything else is 688 00:35:43,400 --> 00:35:44,640 Speaker 1: going on, because it's. 689 00:35:44,520 --> 00:35:46,680 Speaker 3: Gonna be there. I can't let it get to me. 690 00:35:47,080 --> 00:35:48,920 Speaker 3: But you had some gems. 691 00:35:48,960 --> 00:35:51,800 Speaker 1: You had some really good stuff for the people today 692 00:35:51,960 --> 00:35:53,160 Speaker 1: and for me as well. 693 00:35:53,280 --> 00:35:54,040 Speaker 2: So I love it. 694 00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:56,200 Speaker 3: I love it, I appreciate it. 695 00:35:56,239 --> 00:35:59,520 Speaker 1: So I'm gonna give us something real short and sweet 696 00:35:59,800 --> 00:36:00,960 Speaker 1: to level us off. 697 00:36:01,480 --> 00:36:04,600 Speaker 2: You got me traumatized, not sure, just a. 698 00:36:04,640 --> 00:36:08,480 Speaker 3: Positive thought, y'all. Tea told me my positive thought was 699 00:36:08,640 --> 00:36:12,760 Speaker 3: long last week, so I'm okay, that's what short and sweet. 700 00:36:12,800 --> 00:36:16,719 Speaker 1: But you know what, it's really spot on for what 701 00:36:16,800 --> 00:36:19,520 Speaker 1: this topic is about. When we talk about goal setting 702 00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:22,160 Speaker 1: and putting too much pressure on us, we need to 703 00:36:22,160 --> 00:36:27,560 Speaker 1: live our life. So this sense in between goals is 704 00:36:27,560 --> 00:36:31,840 Speaker 1: a thing called life that has to be lived and enjoyed. 705 00:36:32,600 --> 00:36:33,560 Speaker 2: So go live your life. 706 00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:34,759 Speaker 3: Period. 707 00:36:36,320 --> 00:36:39,040 Speaker 2: That was a really good one because it was short 708 00:36:39,040 --> 00:36:44,960 Speaker 2: and sweet. It wasn't because I'm messing with you. It 709 00:36:45,200 --> 00:36:49,160 Speaker 2: was no, it was I was a telling too long, 710 00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:53,120 Speaker 2: but she was quote talking about it. I got a 711 00:36:53,160 --> 00:36:54,799 Speaker 2: short one for us, and I was like, Sis, that 712 00:36:54,840 --> 00:36:55,600 Speaker 2: ship won short. 713 00:36:55,719 --> 00:36:57,400 Speaker 3: By the time I finished, I was like, damn, that 714 00:36:57,480 --> 00:37:00,520 Speaker 3: really wasn't short. But today was short. It's a great one. 715 00:37:00,640 --> 00:37:02,960 Speaker 2: Yeah, And it was a good message, really good message. 716 00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:05,759 Speaker 2: I really love that. So, yes, set your goals, but 717 00:37:05,880 --> 00:37:08,719 Speaker 2: live your life. And we hope that part of living 718 00:37:08,760 --> 00:37:11,000 Speaker 2: your life means continuing to listen to the levels of 719 00:37:11,040 --> 00:37:14,520 Speaker 2: this podcast because we appreciate that and we want to 720 00:37:14,560 --> 00:37:18,000 Speaker 2: make sure that we are sharing our thoughts and sharing 721 00:37:18,080 --> 00:37:20,880 Speaker 2: information that you find beneficial and that you relate to, 722 00:37:21,040 --> 00:37:23,920 Speaker 2: So please continue to let us know if you're enjoying 723 00:37:24,320 --> 00:37:27,120 Speaker 2: our next level conversations about the real shit that women 724 00:37:27,200 --> 00:37:30,640 Speaker 2: go through. Right, So, leave us a review in Apple Podcasts, 725 00:37:30,719 --> 00:37:32,520 Speaker 2: or you can email us at the Levels of This 726 00:37:32,560 --> 00:37:35,160 Speaker 2: Podcast at gmail dot com. Tell us what you thought 727 00:37:35,200 --> 00:37:37,759 Speaker 2: of this week's show. Tell us what maybe you want 728 00:37:37,760 --> 00:37:39,839 Speaker 2: to talk about next. For that matter, you can even 729 00:37:39,880 --> 00:37:41,840 Speaker 2: share what some of the goals are that you're setting. 730 00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:44,080 Speaker 2: We are not haters. We're not going to steal y'all 731 00:37:44,080 --> 00:37:47,680 Speaker 2: idea neither, So it's okay you just share your goals 732 00:37:47,719 --> 00:37:53,719 Speaker 2: with us. Okay, Now, make sure you're also following us 733 00:37:53,719 --> 00:37:57,560 Speaker 2: on Instagram at lttpod. But until next time, guys, keep 734 00:37:57,560 --> 00:38:00,279 Speaker 2: your mentals ground level and we'll be back next week. 735 00:38:00,600 --> 00:38:06,399 Speaker 1: Peace. Listen to Levels to This on America's number one 736 00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:10,240 Speaker 1: podcast network, iHeart. Open your free iHeart app and search 737 00:38:10,400 --> 00:38:13,320 Speaker 1: Levels to This with Ryl Swoops and Tareka Foster Brasbee 738 00:38:13,440 --> 00:38:14,280 Speaker 1: and start listening.