1 00:00:04,920 --> 00:00:10,080 Speaker 1: Welcome to the ten Minute Storyteller. That's me Bill Simpson, 2 00:00:10,280 --> 00:00:15,040 Speaker 1: your host, narrator and author. We hear at the ten 3 00:00:15,080 --> 00:00:19,640 Speaker 1: Minute Storyteller endeavor to entertain you with tall tales or 4 00:00:19,720 --> 00:00:24,840 Speaker 1: rendered swiftly and with the utmost empathy. We pledge to 5 00:00:25,000 --> 00:00:29,520 Speaker 1: pack as much entertainment, emotion, and exploration into the human 6 00:00:29,560 --> 00:00:40,120 Speaker 1: condition as ten minutes will permit. Mini novels on steroids. 7 00:00:41,479 --> 00:00:46,600 Speaker 1: This week we meet Carl. Carl's made his dough, occupies 8 00:00:46,720 --> 00:00:51,040 Speaker 1: the corner office. He's traveled the world, bought the beach 9 00:00:51,080 --> 00:00:53,880 Speaker 1: house and the fishing boat, and the snazzy fleet of 10 00:00:54,000 --> 00:00:59,320 Speaker 1: fancy cars. Too bad, Carl hasn't been able to escape 11 00:00:59,360 --> 00:01:03,760 Speaker 1: the past, the war, the damn war. He's tried everything, 12 00:01:04,120 --> 00:01:15,280 Speaker 1: but he can't silence the explosions, the relentless explosions. Better 13 00:01:15,360 --> 00:01:21,280 Speaker 1: off dead. Carl sits at the broad desk in his 14 00:01:21,440 --> 00:01:25,960 Speaker 1: corner office, the barrel of the revolver pressed against his temple. 15 00:01:26,800 --> 00:01:30,320 Speaker 1: How many times has the explosion gone off in his head? 16 00:01:30,480 --> 00:01:34,240 Speaker 1: A thousand times? Ten thousand? What a joke? Try a 17 00:01:34,319 --> 00:01:37,800 Speaker 1: thousand times an hour, ten thousand and more times a day, 18 00:01:38,200 --> 00:01:41,600 Speaker 1: three million times a year, for thirty three years in 19 00:01:41,800 --> 00:01:47,760 Speaker 1: counting one hundred and twenty million explosions, and Holy Christ, 20 00:01:47,920 --> 00:02:00,160 Speaker 1: there's another one, and another and another, as plentiful as heartbeats, marriage, wife, kids, work, play, booze, drugs, whores, gambling, 21 00:02:00,320 --> 00:02:03,920 Speaker 1: mountain climbing, skin diving, helly skiing, to the ends of 22 00:02:03,960 --> 00:02:08,959 Speaker 1: the earth and back. No reprieve, none ever, in bed 23 00:02:09,000 --> 00:02:11,440 Speaker 1: at night, in bed in the morning, in the middle 24 00:02:11,480 --> 00:02:13,920 Speaker 1: of a meeting, in the middle of the kid's football game, 25 00:02:14,200 --> 00:02:16,480 Speaker 1: in the middle of a jaw dropping run down some 26 00:02:16,639 --> 00:02:20,320 Speaker 1: wild snow covered glacier in British Columbia, in the middle 27 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:25,640 Speaker 1: of an orgasm. For Christ's sake, kaboom. It was not 28 00:02:26,040 --> 00:02:30,359 Speaker 1: his first amphibious landing. It was, in fact his ninth, 29 00:02:30,760 --> 00:02:33,640 Speaker 1: including the early ones when he'd come in late with 30 00:02:33,680 --> 00:02:38,160 Speaker 1: the engineers. The beaches secured save for the occasional land 31 00:02:38,320 --> 00:02:42,040 Speaker 1: mine or jap who'd only been pretending he was dead. 32 00:02:43,000 --> 00:02:46,520 Speaker 1: The slanting eyed bastards would lie there, face down in 33 00:02:46,600 --> 00:02:49,680 Speaker 1: the damp sand for hours, not moving a muscle, not 34 00:02:49,720 --> 00:02:54,680 Speaker 1: even breathing. Scrawny half starved nips could hold their breath 35 00:02:54,680 --> 00:02:58,760 Speaker 1: for days. And then you'd walk by, carrying med supplies 36 00:02:58,840 --> 00:03:02,000 Speaker 1: or ammocases and a little some bitches would pop up 37 00:03:02,040 --> 00:03:04,200 Speaker 1: and shoot you in the face or bayonet you in 38 00:03:04,240 --> 00:03:08,200 Speaker 1: the balls. They always went for the balls. Always. Brass 39 00:03:08,240 --> 00:03:10,640 Speaker 1: got wind of that crazy shit, and right away they 40 00:03:10,720 --> 00:03:14,280 Speaker 1: ordered the MPs to go around and level around into 41 00:03:14,320 --> 00:03:20,959 Speaker 1: every nip head dead or faking dead. Sweat pours off 42 00:03:21,080 --> 00:03:26,120 Speaker 1: Carl's face, His hand shakes, his finger twitches on the trigger. 43 00:03:26,600 --> 00:03:29,480 Speaker 1: He wishes his finger would just pull the damn trigger. 44 00:03:29,520 --> 00:03:32,320 Speaker 1: Already pull it and be done with it, done with 45 00:03:32,440 --> 00:03:33,520 Speaker 1: the explosions. 46 00:03:33,760 --> 00:03:35,560 Speaker 2: Kublam. 47 00:03:35,760 --> 00:03:37,520 Speaker 1: Is the office door locked? Is it that I locked 48 00:03:37,520 --> 00:03:40,560 Speaker 1: the door? Christ Mildred or one of the partners walks 49 00:03:40,600 --> 00:03:43,200 Speaker 1: in and sees me sitting here with this gun shoved 50 00:03:43,280 --> 00:03:50,560 Speaker 1: up against my temple? Holy fuck? With lieutenants dying faster 51 00:03:50,720 --> 00:03:53,960 Speaker 1: than goldfish, they made him a captain in no time. 52 00:03:54,360 --> 00:03:56,680 Speaker 1: He didn't want to be a captain. He didn't want 53 00:03:56,680 --> 00:03:59,640 Speaker 1: to be an officer or an enlisted man. He didn't 54 00:03:59,640 --> 00:04:02,320 Speaker 1: want to be in the Core. He didn't want to 55 00:04:02,360 --> 00:04:05,480 Speaker 1: be in the South Pacific fighting Japs. He wanted to 56 00:04:05,520 --> 00:04:09,280 Speaker 1: be back at school, back in Bethlehem, playing split in 57 00:04:09,480 --> 00:04:13,920 Speaker 1: for the engineers, drinking, chasing girls, and trying to get lucky. 58 00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:18,080 Speaker 1: When they made Carl, a captain. His luck ran out. 59 00:04:18,520 --> 00:04:22,160 Speaker 1: No more mop up landings. He'd be taking his company 60 00:04:22,160 --> 00:04:26,800 Speaker 1: ashore in the first wave. One hundred guys, two lieutenants, 61 00:04:27,080 --> 00:04:33,279 Speaker 1: ten sergeants, ten squads his command. Two Higgins boats. Captain, 62 00:04:33,440 --> 00:04:37,280 Speaker 1: the major instructed two Higgins boats, fifty men per boat. 63 00:04:37,720 --> 00:04:41,120 Speaker 1: I know that's a stretch overloaded, to be sure, a 64 00:04:41,160 --> 00:04:43,920 Speaker 1: third boat with thirty five or so per boat would 65 00:04:43,960 --> 00:04:46,800 Speaker 1: be best, But we don't have three boats to spare. 66 00:04:47,480 --> 00:04:50,000 Speaker 1: So squeeze him in, Captain, squeeze him in and make 67 00:04:50,080 --> 00:04:55,760 Speaker 1: do be a man, be a marine, Yes, sir, said Carl. 68 00:04:56,520 --> 00:04:59,760 Speaker 1: You ride in the lead boat, Captain, and let your 69 00:04:59,800 --> 00:05:02,560 Speaker 1: men see you in the lead boat. Let them hear you. 70 00:05:02,960 --> 00:05:06,239 Speaker 1: Pilot will get you into the shallow water before dropping 71 00:05:06,240 --> 00:05:09,520 Speaker 1: the ramp. Get your men ashore without any bullshit, and 72 00:05:09,640 --> 00:05:16,080 Speaker 1: secure the beachhead. Right, secure the beachhead, Carl muttered then, 73 00:05:16,120 --> 00:05:18,760 Speaker 1: and he mutters now. He mutters it aloud as he 74 00:05:18,839 --> 00:05:22,400 Speaker 1: glances out the office window at the Big Apple, a 75 00:05:22,480 --> 00:05:26,640 Speaker 1: quarter of a mile below from his sweet Corner office. 76 00:05:26,680 --> 00:05:30,520 Speaker 1: He sees the Hudson, the south end of Manhattan, and 77 00:05:30,600 --> 00:05:34,520 Speaker 1: the Statue of Liberty. He can practically see out to 78 00:05:34,600 --> 00:05:39,440 Speaker 1: the leafy burg in Jersey, where his enormous center Hall 79 00:05:39,480 --> 00:05:44,200 Speaker 1: Colonial sits atop a prominent bluff. He can see his 80 00:05:44,400 --> 00:05:48,359 Speaker 1: long suffering wife and his well educated kids, and his 81 00:05:48,480 --> 00:05:52,159 Speaker 1: golden retrievers, and his race car he trailers up to 82 00:05:52,279 --> 00:05:56,320 Speaker 1: Lime on weekends, and to the south he can almost 83 00:05:56,320 --> 00:06:01,960 Speaker 1: see his beach house and his fishing boat half a 84 00:06:02,000 --> 00:06:06,960 Speaker 1: mile offshore, beyond range of the JAP artillery. The Higgins 85 00:06:07,000 --> 00:06:11,960 Speaker 1: boats were dropped into the Pacific from the ata's attack 86 00:06:12,279 --> 00:06:17,839 Speaker 1: transport ships. The men, scared shitless in sweating bullets started 87 00:06:17,880 --> 00:06:21,239 Speaker 1: going over the sides, down the ropes and into the boats. 88 00:06:22,000 --> 00:06:27,119 Speaker 1: Their captain, feigning bravery, encouraged his men, assured them JAP 89 00:06:27,279 --> 00:06:31,520 Speaker 1: resistance would be at a minimum. They'd be safely assured 90 00:06:31,560 --> 00:06:34,800 Speaker 1: on the beach in no time, without any trouble at all. 91 00:06:35,000 --> 00:06:38,440 Speaker 1: This is what Carl told them, and so during an 92 00:06:38,680 --> 00:06:42,480 Speaker 1: unexplained delay in the loading of the Higgins boats, Carl 93 00:06:42,560 --> 00:06:46,680 Speaker 1: made one last mad dash for the head. His heart raised, 94 00:06:46,839 --> 00:06:50,359 Speaker 1: his brain pounded, He felt faint, He couldn't get a 95 00:06:50,440 --> 00:06:53,920 Speaker 1: decent breath. He wanted to hide somewhere in the bowels 96 00:06:53,920 --> 00:06:56,880 Speaker 1: of the ship, not emerge until the attack. Until the 97 00:06:56,960 --> 00:07:01,560 Speaker 1: whole goddamn war was over and done with. In the head, 98 00:07:01,760 --> 00:07:04,479 Speaker 1: he vomited, and then he vomited again, and then he 99 00:07:04,600 --> 00:07:07,120 Speaker 1: just barely got his pants down and his ass on 100 00:07:07,160 --> 00:07:12,120 Speaker 1: the seat before half his insides washed out through his anus, 101 00:07:12,160 --> 00:07:16,040 Speaker 1: and then an emotional and physical wreck. He pulled himself 102 00:07:16,080 --> 00:07:20,080 Speaker 1: together and returned to his command. The loading of the 103 00:07:20,120 --> 00:07:23,640 Speaker 1: Higgins boats had finally resumed. He had to hurry over 104 00:07:23,680 --> 00:07:27,680 Speaker 1: the side and scurry down the ropes the last one aboard. 105 00:07:28,920 --> 00:07:33,840 Speaker 1: Carl dropped into the overcrowded Higgins boat. The men shoulder 106 00:07:33,960 --> 00:07:38,080 Speaker 1: to shoulder, pressed together like sardines in a can. And 107 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:42,040 Speaker 1: that's when he realized he was not in the lead boat. 108 00:07:42,520 --> 00:07:45,560 Speaker 1: The lead boat had already pulled away. He was in 109 00:07:45,600 --> 00:07:48,680 Speaker 1: the rear boat, in the rear with the gear. The 110 00:07:48,680 --> 00:07:55,600 Speaker 1: company's captain was in the rear boat. For thirty three years, 111 00:07:55,720 --> 00:08:00,040 Speaker 1: he has told himself, assured himself that climbing into the 112 00:08:00,160 --> 00:08:04,080 Speaker 1: wrong boat had been purely an accident, nothing but a 113 00:08:04,120 --> 00:08:08,480 Speaker 1: goddamn accident, a bloody mishap, done not on purpose, but 114 00:08:08,640 --> 00:08:12,440 Speaker 1: merely in haste, because well, because he'd been in the 115 00:08:12,480 --> 00:08:16,600 Speaker 1: head puking and shitting his brains out, had he not 116 00:08:16,800 --> 00:08:21,120 Speaker 1: told himself this, assured himself of this, over and over, 117 00:08:21,480 --> 00:08:24,400 Speaker 1: ten thousand times a day. He would have blown his 118 00:08:24,560 --> 00:08:25,840 Speaker 1: brains out years. 119 00:08:25,600 --> 00:08:27,160 Speaker 2: Ago, decades ago. 120 00:08:27,640 --> 00:08:33,760 Speaker 1: It was an accident, a fucking accident. But still it'll 121 00:08:33,760 --> 00:08:36,160 Speaker 1: be sad for the kids, he thinks when I'm dead, 122 00:08:36,880 --> 00:08:41,280 Speaker 1: Sad and embarrassing having to try to explain why the 123 00:08:41,320 --> 00:08:46,200 Speaker 1: old man killed himself. But what's the alternative? Another thirty 124 00:08:46,240 --> 00:08:50,320 Speaker 1: three years of explosions and suffering and depression that mostly 125 00:08:50,440 --> 00:08:55,959 Speaker 1: manifests itself as anger and rage. Fuck it, just fuck it. 126 00:08:56,440 --> 00:08:59,400 Speaker 1: The wife will be shocked, but after that passes, she'll 127 00:08:59,440 --> 00:09:03,560 Speaker 1: be well. Christ she'll be happy, happy to be done 128 00:09:03,679 --> 00:09:07,440 Speaker 1: dealing with me and my stupid war bullshit. And who 129 00:09:07,440 --> 00:09:11,000 Speaker 1: can blame her? The poor woman has suffered long enough. 130 00:09:11,480 --> 00:09:14,320 Speaker 1: And plus, I mean, there's plenty of dough. I've left, 131 00:09:14,360 --> 00:09:17,840 Speaker 1: plenty of dough. She'll live like a queen. And if 132 00:09:17,880 --> 00:09:20,719 Speaker 1: she wants, she can find another guy, some guy who 133 00:09:20,800 --> 00:09:24,240 Speaker 1: didn't fight in the goddamn war, didn't get crushed by 134 00:09:24,240 --> 00:09:31,400 Speaker 1: the goddamn war. The explosion occurred less than one hundred 135 00:09:31,480 --> 00:09:36,679 Speaker 1: yards off the beach at Bogainville. Until then, the flotilla 136 00:09:36,840 --> 00:09:39,880 Speaker 1: of Higgins boats had made their way toward the island 137 00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:45,280 Speaker 1: with very little resistance. Jap artillery had been minimal. There 138 00:09:45,320 --> 00:09:48,520 Speaker 1: had been some machine gun fire, but even that had 139 00:09:48,559 --> 00:09:54,200 Speaker 1: been erratic and seemed half hearted. Carl had started to 140 00:09:54,200 --> 00:09:58,120 Speaker 1: believe they would take the beach without a fight, without casualties, 141 00:09:58,720 --> 00:10:01,600 Speaker 1: and no one would ever know that he had been 142 00:10:02,640 --> 00:10:08,280 Speaker 1: in the rear boat. Fifty yards ahead, he saw half 143 00:10:08,320 --> 00:10:12,000 Speaker 1: his company hunkered down in the lead Higgins boat. He 144 00:10:12,120 --> 00:10:14,679 Speaker 1: knew he should be in that boat with them, and 145 00:10:14,720 --> 00:10:18,760 Speaker 1: he was plenty worried about the consequences once his commanding 146 00:10:18,840 --> 00:10:25,000 Speaker 1: officer found out that he'd brought up the rear A 147 00:10:25,160 --> 00:10:31,359 Speaker 1: Type ninety nine eighty one millimeter Jap infantry mortar caused 148 00:10:31,520 --> 00:10:36,559 Speaker 1: the explosion. Other than their rifles and a few machine guns, 149 00:10:36,760 --> 00:10:39,240 Speaker 1: it was all the Japs had left to fight the 150 00:10:39,320 --> 00:10:44,040 Speaker 1: amphibious landing. They'd waited and waited until the Yankee dogs 151 00:10:44,120 --> 00:10:49,280 Speaker 1: grew close before firing. Most of the mortars landed harmlessly 152 00:10:49,400 --> 00:10:53,679 Speaker 1: in the sea, but this one, this one landed dead 153 00:10:53,800 --> 00:10:57,600 Speaker 1: center in the lead boat, and in an instant, an 154 00:10:57,679 --> 00:11:03,800 Speaker 1: absolute instant, fifty marineans were dead, blown to smithereens. Half 155 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:08,160 Speaker 1: the company, his company Carl's company right there, just ahead, 156 00:11:08,480 --> 00:11:13,760 Speaker 1: not fifty yards out in front, and now gone, gone, gone, gone, 157 00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:18,640 Speaker 1: no trace other than some splintered plywood and random body 158 00:11:18,720 --> 00:11:23,800 Speaker 1: parts floating on the surface of the sea. Dead fifty 159 00:11:24,240 --> 00:11:30,440 Speaker 1: dead marines. Carl pulls the barrel of the revolver away 160 00:11:30,520 --> 00:11:34,920 Speaker 1: from his temple, sticks the gun in the bottom drawer 161 00:11:34,960 --> 00:11:38,520 Speaker 1: of his desk, and locks that drawer uptight, as he's 162 00:11:38,559 --> 00:11:43,080 Speaker 1: done so many times before. But he assures himself that 163 00:11:43,160 --> 00:11:46,320 Speaker 1: he will do it tomorrow. Definitely tomorrow, He'll do it. 164 00:11:46,559 --> 00:11:58,480 Speaker 2: Kaboom, KaBlam. 165 00:11:58,679 --> 00:12:03,240 Speaker 1: Thanks for listening to this original audio presentation of Better 166 00:12:03,320 --> 00:12:08,480 Speaker 1: Off Dead. If you enjoy today's story, please take a 167 00:12:08,480 --> 00:12:13,199 Speaker 1: few seconds to rate, review, and subscribe to this podcast, 168 00:12:14,080 --> 00:12:18,520 Speaker 1: and then go to Thomas William Simpson dot com for 169 00:12:18,800 --> 00:12:23,960 Speaker 1: additional information about the author and to view his extensive canon. 170 00:12:25,040 --> 00:12:29,080 Speaker 1: The Ten Minute Storyteller is produced by Andrew Pleglsi and 171 00:12:29,200 --> 00:12:33,640 Speaker 1: Josh Colodney and as part of the Elvis Duran Podcast 172 00:12:33,720 --> 00:12:39,760 Speaker 1: Network in partnership with Iheartproductions. Until next time, this is 173 00:12:40,000 --> 00:12:43,200 Speaker 1: Bill Simpson, your ten Minute Storyteller.