Speaker 1: I never told you guys the Martha Stewart story from
Speaker 1: the very beginning. And I want to recognize sort of
Speaker 1: really subtle rivalries that you've had in your life that
Speaker 1: lasts so long that they've become comical, you know what
Speaker 1: I mean. Did you ever see that movie Few with
Speaker 1: like I think it was Betty Davis and Joan Crawford
Speaker 1: or two people like that was in Susan Surrandon and
Speaker 1: Jessica Lang were in it, but they were enemies for
Speaker 1: so many years that they had to lean into it,
Speaker 1: you know what I mean. Like it's like, it's just
Speaker 1: it's so iconic as a as a Few that each person,
Speaker 1: I guess, has to respect the other. So I was
Speaker 1: thinking about how someone was talking about Martha Stewart and
Speaker 1: we're definitely not friends, but there was a moment and
Speaker 1: we almost did this TV project together despite the fact
Speaker 1: that she can't stand me, And it's like I almost
Speaker 1: respect the fact that she hasn't been able to stand
Speaker 1: me the whole time. And I can't really stand her either,
Speaker 1: but there's something about it and that that I respect.
Speaker 1: And I've always respected her work ethic and you know
Speaker 1: that she's a she's a ball buster, going for it
Speaker 1: her own way like, and I know whether she would
Speaker 1: admit it or not, she feels the same way about me.
Speaker 1: But I was talking to someone and I was explaining
Speaker 1: to them the whole Martha Stewart story, and it's pretty crazy.
Speaker 1: I was on the Apprentice, not celeb but regular person
Speaker 1: for Martha Stewart, and I did well the whole way through.
Speaker 1: And there was one time when somebody walked her through
Speaker 1: the loft and she saw that I had a louis
Speaker 1: Utan little suit. This guy had bought me the suit.
Speaker 1: So I'm this girl who's broke, who needs this job,
Speaker 1: and she saw my loui Utan suit and commented on it.
Speaker 1: That's the only reason I mentioned I wasn't there because
Speaker 1: I was out on a reward for winning a task
Speaker 1: or something. I wasn't in the loft, but she asked.
Speaker 1: She said, oh, who's is this? Let me guess Bethany.
Speaker 1: So in my mind, which I didn't realize, how good
Speaker 1: at being strategic I am, I thought to myself, Oh God,
Speaker 1: that's not good. And then towards the end, when it
Speaker 1: was a live finale, we were done with the show
Speaker 1: for a while, and then they go and produce it,
Speaker 1: and then they're gonna have a live finale months later.
Speaker 1: So you're living your life knowing who with a final two,
Speaker 1: et cetera, which I was one of, and then we're
Speaker 1: gonna do the live finale. On the day of the
Speaker 1: Life finale, I saw Bill Clinton and his daughter Hilary
Speaker 1: at Barney's upstairs. I was eating a salad. My hand
Speaker 1: to God on my life. We walked outside and he
Speaker 1: had like just like a couple of security, you know,
Speaker 1: it wasn't a whole thing at all, two to three guys,
Speaker 1: but real cool. And I said hello, and I told
Speaker 1: Bill Clinton that he had spinach in his tooth because
Speaker 1: he did from a salad. I swear to God this happened.
Speaker 1: There were a bunch of people around, not like in
Speaker 1: a rude when he was he was, you know, like
Speaker 1: any human being, like okay, thank you, and the spinach.
Speaker 1: I was too. So I made the mistake of letting
Speaker 1: Martha know that that happened, and it was like almost
Speaker 1: like me trying to be on her level. And there
Speaker 1: was another person it was actually Paul Allen who passed away,
Speaker 1: who I knew. He called me and said, I hear
Speaker 1: you're on Martha Stewart's show. I told her we're friends,
Speaker 1: and I'm like, om, please, no, that's not because then
Speaker 1: she's going to think that I'm not this person who
Speaker 1: needs this apprentice job because I know people. So that,
Speaker 1: combined with the Bill Clinton thing, was all like me too.
Speaker 1: At the level of Martha Stewart, I knew this wasn't
Speaker 1: going to go well. And by the way that she's
Speaker 1: what she said to me when she fired me is insane,
Speaker 1: Like you've seen Donald Trump fire a bunch of people
Speaker 1: and the way he did it. She said, Bethany, you're
Speaker 1: pushy your show off and you feel the need to
Speaker 1: make a physical impression, which is not entirely necessary. Martha
Speaker 1: Stewart living on the media. Oh yeah, let me try
Speaker 1: to remember so in word for word. So she hated me.
Speaker 1: She hated me. Um, and and I had gotten boobs,
Speaker 1: like an implant in my boobs, which I later took out,
Speaker 1: and that happened during that show, during the time between
Speaker 1: then and when it aired. I think anyway, there was
Speaker 1: something with the boobs. There was a change with the boobs,
Speaker 1: and they were very big at the finale. Okay, so
Speaker 1: now I don't get the job I go to St.
Speaker 1: Barts with Alice Slain, the girl who was on the Housewives. Okay,
Speaker 1: so now I'm in St. Bart's. Paul Allen has a
Speaker 1: boat there and I like know him to the very
Speaker 1: little but enough to be like, oh my god, I
Speaker 1: want to go on Paul Allen's boat in St. Barts.
Speaker 1: So I managed to beget on the boat and Martha
Speaker 1: Stewart is on the boat because she's in St. Barts
Speaker 1: because that's like her town. I'm like one of those
Speaker 1: loser girls who can't even call myself an Instagram model
Speaker 1: type loser girl because I'm not on Instagram and I'm
Speaker 1: not as hot as they are. I'm just a girl
Speaker 1: that's broke, that's insane Barts. It's not a great feeling.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it looks like because I don't
Speaker 1: know if you could tell. So um and I go
Speaker 1: on Paul Allen's boat and Martha's on there and she's
Speaker 1: talking to bon John bon Jovi, and I wore the
Speaker 1: most fuck you dress that ever existed. It was adult
Speaker 1: gobana satin dress that had a giant gap on the side,
Speaker 1: all skin and it was like black laced up and
Speaker 1: a bra strap type strap on the dress. It was
Speaker 1: a slit. It was I would not wear that. I mean,
Speaker 1: if I wore that now you know, it's like the
Speaker 1: way that j Lo dresses now, like it's like, okay,
Speaker 1: we're getting there. So it would have to be a
Speaker 1: vagus event for me to wear something like that, now
Speaker 1: fuck you dress. I walk up and Martha says, quote unquote, Oh, hi, Bethany,
Speaker 1: this is this is John or John Bond? What I
Speaker 1: bet you? She said, John, How Hi, Bethany, this is
Speaker 1: John and looks at John and says, um, this is
Speaker 1: Bethany or something. She was on my She was on
Speaker 1: my show, but she didn't win, so she's mad at me.
Speaker 1: And I looked at her and I said, Martha, I'm
Speaker 1: not mad at you. You're like someone I used to
Speaker 1: date that I'm still in love with. So that was that.
Speaker 1: And as I see and who cares? Then the show's
Speaker 1: coming out. And because I was years ago, uh in
Speaker 1: a scene where I had no top on in some
Speaker 1: shitty movie that I came with you to hunt down
Speaker 1: that's I don't know what it was. Um came out
Speaker 1: articles called Martha's apornus on like the ten thou thousandth
Speaker 1: page of the daily news, like not even the post,
Speaker 1: maybe the post, but like all the way in the back,
Speaker 1: like past the sports, you know. But to me, that
Speaker 1: was the biggest thing that ever happened in a bad way,
Speaker 1: Like everybody's gonna know. It's so embarrassing. I'm gonna be
Speaker 1: I was dying today. That would be any given Tuesday,
Speaker 1: like Tuesday morning before seven am. I was so panicked.
Speaker 1: So I see Martha at a restaurant. I'm out with
Speaker 1: a friends and I see her at a restaurant and
Speaker 1: I walk over to her and uh, she says, And
Speaker 1: I sit down next to her. She goes, oh, Bethany,
Speaker 1: I just saw your movie. Because the movie was from
Speaker 1: years ago, no one ever saw it. Then, like for
Speaker 1: her to say that, it's the sickest, sickest sorceress statement
Speaker 1: anyone's ever said. Okay, so I stay back to her.
Speaker 1: Oh really, Martha, Well, I just got it inside her
Speaker 1: stock tip and Mike drop. There's more. There's more to
Speaker 1: the Martha story. We just kept running into each other
Speaker 1: and it made her. I hate that I was in
Speaker 1: the same places at her and I always looked up
Speaker 1: to her. So the next time I'm dating this guy,
Speaker 1: Kevin Maser, and he's a photographer and he used to
Speaker 1: go to these amazing events like the Victorias Suker fashion
Speaker 1: show or something else because he'd be shooting it. So
Speaker 1: I get to go to the fabulous Grammys anything. I
Speaker 1: hated it, hated it. Like once or twice it was good,
Speaker 1: but ultimately I don't like to be up late and
Speaker 1: chasing people. That like not for me. So we went
Speaker 1: on Halloween. We're first dating, and everything seemed cute. I
Speaker 1: dressed up like roller girl and he said, we're going
Speaker 1: to a Halloween party and it was Bette Midler's Halloween
Speaker 1: party at the Waldor for the same real you just
Speaker 1: one of those, like one of those, one of those two.
Speaker 1: So um we go and there's all these people, Steve
Speaker 1: Schwarzman and his wife, They're like these billionaires and New
Speaker 1: York society and all these people. I remember Joy Behar
Speaker 1: was there, and I think Rosie o'donald but like that
Speaker 1: kind of the view type group. And I roll in
Speaker 1: in a terry cloth roller off at the same one
Speaker 1: I wore on Housewives, and they're all wearing like fancy
Speaker 1: rich five dollar a plate. Person at the costumes and
Speaker 1: Martha's there and I'm with a guy that literally looks
Speaker 1: nothing like the boyfriend that I had before that. I
Speaker 1: think Martha knew about, read about nothing like and she
Speaker 1: sees me, She's like, oh, is this this? This isn't
Speaker 1: the same guy as that other guy, is it? Because
Speaker 1: I think I saw her on the street or somewhere
Speaker 1: it was like the bitchiest thing ever. It's one guy
Speaker 1: was bald and like short and thin, and one guy
Speaker 1: was Italian with a full head of hair and a
Speaker 1: little pepper coming through like they look nothing alike. So
Speaker 1: in then one time I see her on the street
Speaker 1: and I still can't help myself. And then she came
Speaker 1: on my talk show and I still had to give
Speaker 1: her credit for coming on. Oh somewhere in between that
Speaker 1: we were going to do a TV show together because
Speaker 1: were the same agent, and I like that about her.
Speaker 1: She sat down next to next to me at the
Speaker 1: table and we talked about it, and the woman can't
Speaker 1: stand me, but still I respected that. And then the
Speaker 1: last of the story was when she came on my
Speaker 1: talk show and she called me a best You gotta
Speaker 1: give it to her. So, yeah, that's my Martha story.
Speaker 1: I haven't seen her a long time. So I was
Speaker 1: talking to someone and telling that we were talking about it,
Speaker 1: and I was like, I don't even think or they said,
Speaker 1: I don't even think that's an enemy anymore. That's like
Speaker 1: a friend of me. That's like turned around. That's been
Speaker 1: such a long standing, useless feud that it's great. Probably
Speaker 1: like a Mariah j Lo the poor Man's version, that's
Speaker 1: a rant