1 00:00:00,400 --> 00:00:02,480 Speaker 1: Wake that ass up in the morning. 2 00:00:02,600 --> 00:00:03,640 Speaker 2: The Breakfast Club. 3 00:00:05,080 --> 00:00:06,600 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's the world most dangerous. Wanting to show to 4 00:00:06,640 --> 00:00:09,959 Speaker 3: breakfast Club Charlamagne the God. Laura le Ross is here, 5 00:00:10,160 --> 00:00:11,000 Speaker 3: just hilarious? 6 00:00:11,119 --> 00:00:11,440 Speaker 2: Is here? 7 00:00:12,000 --> 00:00:12,119 Speaker 3: Uh? 8 00:00:12,440 --> 00:00:14,520 Speaker 2: Who's feeling in for envy? Laura l Rosse is feeling 9 00:00:14,520 --> 00:00:16,520 Speaker 2: in for envy? Is it me feeling in? He's here? 10 00:00:16,720 --> 00:00:18,720 Speaker 1: I'm here, but she's feeling in? Yeah. 11 00:00:18,840 --> 00:00:21,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, he's a guest today though, because his new book, 12 00:00:21,520 --> 00:00:24,119 Speaker 3: Real Life, Real Family with the Queen of the House 13 00:00:24,400 --> 00:00:27,840 Speaker 3: Gia Casey is out right now will come like April fifteen. 14 00:00:27,560 --> 00:00:28,520 Speaker 1: Because April fifteenth. 15 00:00:28,600 --> 00:00:29,680 Speaker 2: Yes, how you feeling? 16 00:00:29,720 --> 00:00:34,519 Speaker 4: You humbled by being given the opportunity to write a 17 00:00:34,520 --> 00:00:38,800 Speaker 4: book about something that is the most important thing to me, 18 00:00:39,040 --> 00:00:42,080 Speaker 4: the thing I'm the most passionate about, the thing that 19 00:00:42,440 --> 00:00:47,400 Speaker 4: brings me the most joy family, parenting, my household, our home. 20 00:00:47,960 --> 00:00:49,280 Speaker 4: So yes, I'm very humbled. 21 00:00:50,320 --> 00:00:53,199 Speaker 5: This is the second book. Yes, it's amazing. You know what, 22 00:00:53,360 --> 00:00:55,920 Speaker 5: let's just rewind it big for those who don't know 23 00:00:58,120 --> 00:01:00,240 Speaker 5: who is the Casey screted? Where did that name come from? 24 00:01:00,240 --> 00:01:01,200 Speaker 5: How did y'all get started? 25 00:01:01,840 --> 00:01:04,640 Speaker 2: Do you remember the Ksey Crew? Yes? 26 00:01:04,680 --> 00:01:05,200 Speaker 1: Our last name? 27 00:01:05,200 --> 00:01:05,560 Speaker 2: What do you mean? 28 00:01:05,680 --> 00:01:05,800 Speaker 6: No? 29 00:01:05,800 --> 00:01:07,080 Speaker 4: No, no, but do you remember how we came up 30 00:01:07,080 --> 00:01:07,480 Speaker 4: with the name. 31 00:01:07,800 --> 00:01:08,720 Speaker 1: How do we come up with the name. 32 00:01:08,760 --> 00:01:12,240 Speaker 4: We were doing our first podcast, and it was before 33 00:01:12,280 --> 00:01:15,320 Speaker 4: we were doing like the audio version of the video version. 34 00:01:15,319 --> 00:01:17,480 Speaker 4: It was just the audio version, and we started the 35 00:01:17,520 --> 00:01:20,600 Speaker 4: podcast without a name. And we sat there and we 36 00:01:20,800 --> 00:01:23,959 Speaker 4: kind of was coming up with like different names, and 37 00:01:24,000 --> 00:01:25,920 Speaker 4: one of us said, well, how about the k C crew. 38 00:01:26,000 --> 00:01:27,600 Speaker 4: You know, our last name is Casey. We have a 39 00:01:27,600 --> 00:01:29,920 Speaker 4: whole crew of kids, a whole gaggle. What about the 40 00:01:29,959 --> 00:01:32,800 Speaker 4: k C Crew. And then people you know, DMed us 41 00:01:32,840 --> 00:01:34,720 Speaker 4: and emailed and whatnot, and they said, yeah, we love 42 00:01:34,800 --> 00:01:37,039 Speaker 4: that name. We love that name. So we decided to 43 00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:38,559 Speaker 4: call ourselves the KC Crew. 44 00:01:38,600 --> 00:01:40,080 Speaker 1: Amazing that's where it came about. 45 00:01:40,720 --> 00:01:43,720 Speaker 6: And whenever you post on social you always hashtag the 46 00:01:44,200 --> 00:01:46,520 Speaker 6: k C Crew. Yes, MV does as well. But one 47 00:01:46,600 --> 00:01:48,440 Speaker 6: of the things that you guys were really good from 48 00:01:48,480 --> 00:01:51,480 Speaker 6: the podcast to bringing it online is you pay attention 49 00:01:51,520 --> 00:01:53,640 Speaker 6: to the comments and the responses. 50 00:01:53,720 --> 00:01:53,960 Speaker 1: Kia. 51 00:01:54,080 --> 00:01:55,120 Speaker 4: Yeah, and you. 52 00:01:54,760 --> 00:01:57,080 Speaker 6: Guys bring them into the podcast, but you also like 53 00:01:57,120 --> 00:01:59,280 Speaker 6: reflect on them on social media. So I want to 54 00:01:59,320 --> 00:02:02,360 Speaker 6: read one of the the posts that we pulled in. 55 00:02:02,480 --> 00:02:04,920 Speaker 6: I thought that this was great. You inspired me. This 56 00:02:04,960 --> 00:02:06,920 Speaker 6: is someone commenting to you, guys. You inspired me. I 57 00:02:06,960 --> 00:02:10,120 Speaker 6: wish all parents had this level of intention, planning and vibe. 58 00:02:10,440 --> 00:02:14,639 Speaker 6: Truth is, most parents, moms are stressed, over worked by 59 00:02:14,720 --> 00:02:17,480 Speaker 6: trying to make ends meet, in harboring trauma. Therefore, it's 60 00:02:17,560 --> 00:02:20,320 Speaker 6: passed down to the children. You've passed down light and 61 00:02:20,360 --> 00:02:22,400 Speaker 6: love because of that and because of what you are, 62 00:02:22,520 --> 00:02:24,520 Speaker 6: high five to all of the parents doing their best. 63 00:02:25,040 --> 00:02:27,519 Speaker 6: And you use that as a moment to talk about like, no, 64 00:02:27,880 --> 00:02:30,200 Speaker 6: it gets a little crazy over here, but oh yeah, 65 00:02:30,240 --> 00:02:32,080 Speaker 6: but it's important because when you if you've ever been 66 00:02:32,120 --> 00:02:33,560 Speaker 6: around your family, it is a lot of love and 67 00:02:33,600 --> 00:02:34,040 Speaker 6: a lot of light. 68 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:36,360 Speaker 7: But I'm sure on the inside things get crazy. 69 00:02:36,520 --> 00:02:40,160 Speaker 4: Well, you know, that's a big misconception. People assume that 70 00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:43,920 Speaker 4: because you live a certain lifestyle or because you've earned 71 00:02:43,919 --> 00:02:47,520 Speaker 4: a certain financial status, that you don't have the same 72 00:02:47,520 --> 00:02:51,040 Speaker 4: problems that they have. You know, in the same comment section, 73 00:02:51,800 --> 00:02:54,640 Speaker 4: you'll see people like, oh, it's easy when you have money. Oh, 74 00:02:54,720 --> 00:02:57,960 Speaker 4: you know, like your problems are not our problems. But 75 00:02:59,320 --> 00:03:02,760 Speaker 4: that is such a misconception. You know, we just got 76 00:03:02,800 --> 00:03:05,679 Speaker 4: over one of the toughest years of our lives, probably 77 00:03:05,720 --> 00:03:09,000 Speaker 4: the worst year of our life. And yeah, the last 78 00:03:09,000 --> 00:03:12,320 Speaker 4: two years have been and that's a conversation for another day. 79 00:03:12,520 --> 00:03:16,680 Speaker 4: But we've gone through a lot of trauma, a lot 80 00:03:16,680 --> 00:03:19,920 Speaker 4: of disappointment, a lot of heartache, a lot of sadness, 81 00:03:20,360 --> 00:03:23,280 Speaker 4: and things that we had to shield our children from, 82 00:03:23,919 --> 00:03:27,200 Speaker 4: things that we had to figure out how to keep 83 00:03:27,320 --> 00:03:31,880 Speaker 4: that brave face and how to not let it affect 84 00:03:31,880 --> 00:03:35,840 Speaker 4: our family foundation. You know, because that trickle down effect 85 00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:39,880 Speaker 4: is so real. Your kids know when you're not happy, 86 00:03:40,200 --> 00:03:43,600 Speaker 4: they know when you're stressed, they know when you're struggling, 87 00:03:43,880 --> 00:03:46,280 Speaker 4: they know when you're upset with one another, and they 88 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:50,000 Speaker 4: receive that energy and they project that energy. And that's 89 00:03:50,040 --> 00:03:53,920 Speaker 4: something that is universal because there's not a single family 90 00:03:54,040 --> 00:03:59,960 Speaker 4: out there that doesn't have trials, tribulations, heartache, setbacks, finance 91 00:04:00,240 --> 00:04:02,320 Speaker 4: stress is I don't care who you are, you have 92 00:04:02,480 --> 00:04:09,440 Speaker 4: experienced that. So financial abundance, financial security, even for people 93 00:04:09,640 --> 00:04:12,560 Speaker 4: that have that, that in and of itself doesn't mean 94 00:04:12,560 --> 00:04:15,360 Speaker 4: that you're happy. Some of the most miserable people that 95 00:04:15,480 --> 00:04:19,360 Speaker 4: I know do very very well. It doesn't mean that 96 00:04:19,640 --> 00:04:23,520 Speaker 4: you come along with the skill set to know how 97 00:04:23,560 --> 00:04:26,040 Speaker 4: to live a happy life and how to teach your 98 00:04:26,160 --> 00:04:30,800 Speaker 4: children how to have a happy life. So that comment 99 00:04:30,960 --> 00:04:34,039 Speaker 4: really really stood out to me because she spoke on 100 00:04:34,480 --> 00:04:37,400 Speaker 4: the troubles and the trauma and the word trauma that 101 00:04:37,440 --> 00:04:39,800 Speaker 4: she used, and Rashan will speak on the word trauma. 102 00:04:39,839 --> 00:04:42,599 Speaker 4: Sometimes he feels as though it's a word that's overused, 103 00:04:43,880 --> 00:04:47,640 Speaker 4: but it's a word that represents something that so many 104 00:04:47,839 --> 00:04:51,920 Speaker 4: people endure. The difference now is that we have words 105 00:04:51,960 --> 00:04:55,080 Speaker 4: to identify how we feel and what we go through, 106 00:04:55,560 --> 00:05:00,000 Speaker 4: and it's articulated. Because when our feelings and our experience, 107 00:05:00,080 --> 00:05:04,480 Speaker 4: says are articulated, then you're able to communicate. People are 108 00:05:04,480 --> 00:05:07,239 Speaker 4: able to understand you, You're able to understand other people. 109 00:05:07,279 --> 00:05:09,800 Speaker 4: You're able to have empathy and compassion for other people 110 00:05:09,800 --> 00:05:13,360 Speaker 4: because now we're all speaking in universal language. Like the 111 00:05:13,400 --> 00:05:17,440 Speaker 4: word triggered, like the word trauma, like the word gas. 112 00:05:17,800 --> 00:05:20,400 Speaker 4: You know, these are things that some may think are 113 00:05:20,440 --> 00:05:25,640 Speaker 4: overused now, but yes, but there is value there. There 114 00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:28,279 Speaker 4: is value there because now we can see each other, 115 00:05:28,600 --> 00:05:29,800 Speaker 4: we understand each other. 116 00:05:30,040 --> 00:05:31,160 Speaker 2: When you're trying to create. 117 00:05:30,960 --> 00:05:33,400 Speaker 3: A safe space, you know, how is it to venture 118 00:05:33,480 --> 00:05:34,960 Speaker 3: into an unsafe space like the. 119 00:05:34,880 --> 00:05:38,120 Speaker 2: Comments, especially when somebody looks on the air every day, 120 00:05:38,400 --> 00:05:39,839 Speaker 2: you know what I mean? You have an opinion about. 121 00:05:40,000 --> 00:05:47,800 Speaker 4: Every day, so I read every single comment. I interact. 122 00:05:48,839 --> 00:05:52,560 Speaker 4: It started when I had a lower follower account. It 123 00:05:52,640 --> 00:05:57,000 Speaker 4: started because I always felt that if someone follows me, 124 00:05:57,720 --> 00:06:01,040 Speaker 4: that's an investment in a small invent maybe, but it's 125 00:06:01,080 --> 00:06:05,359 Speaker 4: an investment that they put into me. And they're looking 126 00:06:05,400 --> 00:06:08,440 Speaker 4: at my content content, they're looking at my pictures. And 127 00:06:08,960 --> 00:06:11,279 Speaker 4: you left a comment, I want to respond back to you. 128 00:06:11,360 --> 00:06:14,000 Speaker 4: I used to respond to almost every comment, you know, 129 00:06:14,200 --> 00:06:17,160 Speaker 4: but then when my followers went up, I wasn't really 130 00:06:17,240 --> 00:06:19,320 Speaker 4: able to do that. And that was something that you know, 131 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:22,159 Speaker 4: I had to take that on the chin. I wasn't 132 00:06:22,200 --> 00:06:28,040 Speaker 4: able to. But it's a sign of respect. And you said, 133 00:06:28,080 --> 00:06:30,760 Speaker 4: why do I do that to myself? Because I'm strong 134 00:06:30,839 --> 00:06:33,200 Speaker 4: enough to do that. I'm strong enough to do that. 135 00:06:33,600 --> 00:06:37,800 Speaker 4: The comments don't if they are negative, and I have 136 00:06:37,839 --> 00:06:40,960 Speaker 4: to say, I don't receive a lot of negative comments, thankfully, 137 00:06:41,000 --> 00:06:44,760 Speaker 4: thank God. But if they are negative, I look at 138 00:06:44,760 --> 00:06:48,479 Speaker 4: it as insight. I might ask myself, why might someone 139 00:06:48,520 --> 00:06:52,160 Speaker 4: have that perspective? Why may you have drawn that conclusion? 140 00:06:52,520 --> 00:06:55,520 Speaker 4: To me? It feeds my mental because I'm a thinker. 141 00:06:55,520 --> 00:06:59,040 Speaker 4: I'm a deep thinker. I'm all over things. I love 142 00:06:59,080 --> 00:07:03,000 Speaker 4: to understand people, I love the concepts that kind of 143 00:07:03,000 --> 00:07:07,200 Speaker 4: creates society. I love to understand cause and effect relationships 144 00:07:07,200 --> 00:07:11,040 Speaker 4: and things of that nature. So for me, the comments 145 00:07:11,080 --> 00:07:14,080 Speaker 4: are food and they also bring me happiness when they're good. 146 00:07:14,240 --> 00:07:17,800 Speaker 4: It lets you know that you're reaching someone whatever it 147 00:07:17,800 --> 00:07:19,600 Speaker 4: is that you're putting out, because it's in the sense 148 00:07:19,600 --> 00:07:22,200 Speaker 4: of sharing. There's a lot of things that I don't share, 149 00:07:22,560 --> 00:07:25,000 Speaker 4: you know what I mean. So if I choose to 150 00:07:25,120 --> 00:07:27,720 Speaker 4: share and it's well received, then that's a good feeling. 151 00:07:27,760 --> 00:07:29,240 Speaker 4: I think that's why a lot of people are on 152 00:07:29,320 --> 00:07:30,560 Speaker 4: or part of the reason why a lot of people 153 00:07:30,560 --> 00:07:32,640 Speaker 4: are on social media, you know what I mean. And 154 00:07:32,800 --> 00:07:35,440 Speaker 4: I'm strong enough to do so, and that's because of 155 00:07:35,480 --> 00:07:38,000 Speaker 4: the way that I was raised. I was raised to 156 00:07:38,080 --> 00:07:44,400 Speaker 4: be a very strong and resilient woman. It comes directly 157 00:07:44,440 --> 00:07:48,080 Speaker 4: from my parents, and I'm fortunate in the sense that 158 00:07:48,200 --> 00:07:54,080 Speaker 4: I can look back and identify things about the way 159 00:07:54,120 --> 00:07:57,800 Speaker 4: that I was raised that created the individual, the woman, 160 00:07:58,320 --> 00:08:02,560 Speaker 4: the mother, the wife that I am, and it's for me. 161 00:08:02,600 --> 00:08:04,480 Speaker 4: It's a very beautiful thing. Both of my parents are 162 00:08:04,480 --> 00:08:07,720 Speaker 4: no longer here, so to be able to say, wow, 163 00:08:07,960 --> 00:08:11,040 Speaker 4: when my mother did this every single day, or when 164 00:08:11,080 --> 00:08:13,520 Speaker 4: she took me here once a week or when she 165 00:08:13,840 --> 00:08:17,040 Speaker 4: said this to me, and those compliments, and that the 166 00:08:17,080 --> 00:08:19,080 Speaker 4: way that she fed me and she fed my soul, 167 00:08:19,200 --> 00:08:21,920 Speaker 4: and the joy that I experienced, and the amount of 168 00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:24,560 Speaker 4: fun that I had as a kid, like I loved 169 00:08:24,600 --> 00:08:26,480 Speaker 4: my life. And it's not because we were wealthy. We 170 00:08:26,480 --> 00:08:29,400 Speaker 4: were not. We were a middle class family. I'm from Brooklyn, 171 00:08:29,520 --> 00:08:32,720 Speaker 4: from East Flatbush. We weren't raised, you know, like I'm 172 00:08:32,760 --> 00:08:35,560 Speaker 4: from an urban area. And it's not. It had nothing 173 00:08:35,640 --> 00:08:39,439 Speaker 4: to do with money. It had nothing to do with wealth. 174 00:08:39,440 --> 00:08:42,800 Speaker 4: It had everything to do with what my parents poured 175 00:08:42,840 --> 00:08:46,520 Speaker 4: into my home and the love that I felt. And 176 00:08:46,840 --> 00:08:50,360 Speaker 4: that is what we put into writing this book. There's 177 00:08:50,360 --> 00:08:52,280 Speaker 4: a lot of books that we could have written, you know, 178 00:08:52,400 --> 00:08:54,800 Speaker 4: so many ideas came out because Real Life for Love 179 00:08:54,880 --> 00:08:57,560 Speaker 4: was a huge success. It was a national bestseller. So's 180 00:08:57,559 --> 00:08:59,840 Speaker 4: I go, you write book about this? You writ we said, 181 00:08:59,840 --> 00:09:02,560 Speaker 4: we write book about family. It's what we know best. 182 00:09:03,120 --> 00:09:05,280 Speaker 4: It's what we know best. We've had so many ups, 183 00:09:05,280 --> 00:09:09,480 Speaker 4: so many downs, so many wins, so many losses, so 184 00:09:09,480 --> 00:09:11,360 Speaker 4: many things that we thought we were doing right that 185 00:09:11,400 --> 00:09:14,760 Speaker 4: we weren't. That we had to regroup and make sure 186 00:09:14,760 --> 00:09:17,680 Speaker 4: that we were balanced, you know, as as a married 187 00:09:17,760 --> 00:09:21,120 Speaker 4: couple because when we didn't agree, it's like my way 188 00:09:21,160 --> 00:09:22,760 Speaker 4: is better, know what my way is better? And this, 189 00:09:23,080 --> 00:09:24,440 Speaker 4: you know, we have to come to a meeting of 190 00:09:24,440 --> 00:09:28,640 Speaker 4: the minds. Yeah, you know what I mean. So a relationship, 191 00:09:29,040 --> 00:09:33,200 Speaker 4: you know, the relationship grew, you know, because we had 192 00:09:33,200 --> 00:09:35,680 Speaker 4: to learn how to see eye to eye as parents. 193 00:09:35,679 --> 00:09:37,839 Speaker 4: So there was just there was many, many ups and downs, 194 00:09:37,880 --> 00:09:40,320 Speaker 4: and we wanted to pour that all into a book, 195 00:09:40,760 --> 00:09:43,040 Speaker 4: you know. We wanted to let everyone know like it's 196 00:09:43,120 --> 00:09:46,920 Speaker 4: really that village mentality. It's really that like we are 197 00:09:46,960 --> 00:09:52,480 Speaker 4: a community, especially our black community because I'm black, yes, yeah, yeah, 198 00:09:52,559 --> 00:10:05,920 Speaker 4: for the record, for the record, some Spanish blood. But 199 00:10:07,480 --> 00:10:10,320 Speaker 4: it's like I know that you're well aware because you 200 00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:15,880 Speaker 4: speak to things of this nature often. But our history 201 00:10:16,200 --> 00:10:22,679 Speaker 4: is being erased in schools and it's being stripped away 202 00:10:22,720 --> 00:10:28,040 Speaker 4: silently in society. So the foundation starts in our homes. 203 00:10:28,600 --> 00:10:33,120 Speaker 4: We have to teach children how to identify themselves. We 204 00:10:33,360 --> 00:10:39,680 Speaker 4: have to teach children that sense of belonging and they 205 00:10:39,720 --> 00:10:44,240 Speaker 4: have to understand that they come from something meaningful. And 206 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:48,199 Speaker 4: if you leave it up to society to teach them that, 207 00:10:48,600 --> 00:10:50,920 Speaker 4: you're going to wind up with children that are lost 208 00:10:51,559 --> 00:10:55,240 Speaker 4: that are overlooked, that don't know how to identify themselves, 209 00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:59,320 Speaker 4: that get taken advantage of, and that are susceptible to 210 00:10:59,679 --> 00:11:03,679 Speaker 4: what society wants for them. So for us, our core, 211 00:11:03,840 --> 00:11:10,800 Speaker 4: our nucleus, our foundation, our home superseds anything else in 212 00:11:10,840 --> 00:11:13,240 Speaker 4: this world. We put our family first. 213 00:11:14,000 --> 00:11:18,120 Speaker 8: Would you say that you and and we have two 214 00:11:18,200 --> 00:11:20,079 Speaker 8: different parenting styles? 215 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:22,800 Speaker 5: It was the more lenient parent. Who was the more 216 00:11:22,920 --> 00:11:23,560 Speaker 5: lenient parent? 217 00:11:24,600 --> 00:11:26,160 Speaker 1: It depends what it is like. 218 00:11:26,320 --> 00:11:28,840 Speaker 9: You know, everybody knows my dad is retired police officer 219 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:31,719 Speaker 9: and ex military, so I'm disciplined. I was the yell 220 00:11:31,760 --> 00:11:34,800 Speaker 9: of the screamer because I said, so is a lot different, 221 00:11:35,040 --> 00:11:37,440 Speaker 9: Like she wants to know why did you feel that 222 00:11:38,000 --> 00:11:38,959 Speaker 9: she likes to break down? 223 00:11:39,640 --> 00:11:40,200 Speaker 2: You don't get it. 224 00:11:40,200 --> 00:11:44,199 Speaker 8: You're gonna get it by the end of the right exactly. 225 00:11:44,480 --> 00:11:46,280 Speaker 9: So you got to think, really think before you speak 226 00:11:46,280 --> 00:11:48,040 Speaker 9: to us, because she's like, all right, well, explain that, 227 00:11:48,320 --> 00:11:50,680 Speaker 9: like I just said it, just because no, no, no, explain this. 228 00:11:51,320 --> 00:11:54,520 Speaker 9: But so I'm more like, because I said so, she's 229 00:11:54,559 --> 00:11:56,640 Speaker 9: more like, well, you can't go to the more because 230 00:11:56,679 --> 00:11:59,520 Speaker 9: of this, because this could happen. Explain your parenting style 231 00:11:59,559 --> 00:12:01,720 Speaker 9: mine is my dad was like, no, and you didn't 232 00:12:01,760 --> 00:12:03,960 Speaker 9: ask why, it just it was what it was. 233 00:12:03,960 --> 00:12:04,880 Speaker 1: You just figured out later. 234 00:12:05,440 --> 00:12:07,239 Speaker 2: Is a little different. I prefer the explanation. 235 00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:11,480 Speaker 4: Yeah. So that's how my parents were with me. I 236 00:12:11,600 --> 00:12:16,600 Speaker 4: knew that my parents were invested in me living a happy, 237 00:12:17,240 --> 00:12:20,840 Speaker 4: fulfilled and fun life. And we didn't go lightly on 238 00:12:20,880 --> 00:12:25,040 Speaker 4: the fun. And because I knew that at end, and 239 00:12:25,320 --> 00:12:27,800 Speaker 4: my parents never said no just for the sake of 240 00:12:27,840 --> 00:12:31,200 Speaker 4: saying no. Because parents are overworked and they are stressed, 241 00:12:31,440 --> 00:12:32,840 Speaker 4: and the last thing they want to hear when they 242 00:12:32,880 --> 00:12:35,240 Speaker 4: walk through the door is Mommy, can I can you 243 00:12:35,280 --> 00:12:37,200 Speaker 4: take me here? Can you buy me this? Can we 244 00:12:37,240 --> 00:12:40,360 Speaker 4: watch this together? Can we go like slow down? 245 00:12:40,840 --> 00:12:40,920 Speaker 6: No? 246 00:12:41,760 --> 00:12:43,319 Speaker 4: And sometimes you say no, you don't even know why 247 00:12:43,320 --> 00:12:48,640 Speaker 4: you're saying no. That's not a good parenting technique. You 248 00:12:48,720 --> 00:12:50,720 Speaker 4: really have to take a moment. You have to take 249 00:12:50,760 --> 00:12:52,360 Speaker 4: a beat. We all have to take a beat to 250 00:12:52,480 --> 00:12:56,839 Speaker 4: listen to our children and be patient. And because I 251 00:12:56,960 --> 00:12:59,200 Speaker 4: knew that my parents were invested in me that way, 252 00:13:00,200 --> 00:13:02,560 Speaker 4: I knew that when they said no there was a 253 00:13:02,559 --> 00:13:05,520 Speaker 4: good reason. Because they would never slight me. They would 254 00:13:05,520 --> 00:13:07,960 Speaker 4: never tell me no because they were too tired. They 255 00:13:07,960 --> 00:13:10,040 Speaker 4: would never tell me no just because they didn't want 256 00:13:10,040 --> 00:13:12,880 Speaker 4: to be bothered. So it's like, oh, well, if mommy 257 00:13:12,880 --> 00:13:15,680 Speaker 4: said no, that means that I'm not supposed to be there, 258 00:13:16,160 --> 00:13:19,240 Speaker 4: or that means that she genuinely can't take me. And 259 00:13:19,320 --> 00:13:21,760 Speaker 4: they both would take the time to explain to me, 260 00:13:22,200 --> 00:13:24,040 Speaker 4: you know, like, you don't want to go to that 261 00:13:24,080 --> 00:13:28,000 Speaker 4: party in Conye Island because in that neighborhood there's a 262 00:13:28,040 --> 00:13:31,199 Speaker 4: lot of shooting and da data and you're a young girl. 263 00:13:31,360 --> 00:13:33,240 Speaker 4: And I'll take it a step further. You know what 264 00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:35,640 Speaker 4: my parents used to do from time to time. They 265 00:13:35,640 --> 00:13:37,560 Speaker 4: would take me to a party, not the one in 266 00:13:37,600 --> 00:13:40,800 Speaker 4: Coney Island, but a party and they would park and 267 00:13:40,920 --> 00:13:44,800 Speaker 4: wait outside for me for two or three hours until 268 00:13:44,840 --> 00:13:47,720 Speaker 4: I came out. And this was before cell phones and 269 00:13:47,760 --> 00:13:49,600 Speaker 4: all that stuff. My dad had this little portable TV 270 00:13:50,000 --> 00:13:53,280 Speaker 4: and he would recline his seat, set the portable TV 271 00:13:53,400 --> 00:13:56,520 Speaker 4: up on the dashboard, and just watch TV until or 272 00:13:56,520 --> 00:13:58,560 Speaker 4: whatever it was that he was watching, until I came out. 273 00:13:58,760 --> 00:14:01,600 Speaker 4: That let me know that my parents rooted for me. 274 00:14:01,760 --> 00:14:04,880 Speaker 4: They wanted me to enjoy life. So when they told 275 00:14:04,960 --> 00:14:08,560 Speaker 4: me no, I knew that I had no business considering it. 276 00:14:08,800 --> 00:14:11,640 Speaker 4: Considering whatever it was that I was considering. 277 00:14:11,320 --> 00:14:12,120 Speaker 1: Take a step forward. 278 00:14:12,160 --> 00:14:14,480 Speaker 9: The other day, London, which is our eleven year old, 279 00:14:14,679 --> 00:14:15,840 Speaker 9: wanted to walk to a friend's. 280 00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:16,400 Speaker 1: House after school. 281 00:14:16,920 --> 00:14:17,920 Speaker 2: A friend's house was a. 282 00:14:17,880 --> 00:14:19,840 Speaker 1: Block away, two blocks, two blocks. 283 00:14:20,080 --> 00:14:22,120 Speaker 9: Gear drives in a car, looking like a stalker and 284 00:14:22,280 --> 00:14:27,400 Speaker 9: followed them the two blocks as they're walking. But London, no, 285 00:14:27,520 --> 00:14:28,960 Speaker 9: London was like, that's my mom following us. 286 00:14:28,960 --> 00:14:29,400 Speaker 2: I don't worry. 287 00:14:29,520 --> 00:14:31,600 Speaker 1: But she just wanted to walk, and Gear followed her 288 00:14:31,640 --> 00:14:32,480 Speaker 1: ass right to that house. 289 00:14:32,520 --> 00:14:34,360 Speaker 4: Well, the thing is that you know, she's eleven, so 290 00:14:34,400 --> 00:14:37,160 Speaker 4: she wants to all of her friends, all of them 291 00:14:37,200 --> 00:14:39,400 Speaker 4: they walk home from school because they all live in 292 00:14:39,440 --> 00:14:42,600 Speaker 4: the same neighborhood and they all walk home. But London 293 00:14:43,080 --> 00:14:46,120 Speaker 4: is not allowed to walk home. No, absolutely, positively not. 294 00:14:46,440 --> 00:14:50,400 Speaker 4: And there's there's this very significant reason for it, well 295 00:14:50,440 --> 00:14:53,360 Speaker 4: at least a partial reason. And I said, all right, babe, 296 00:14:53,560 --> 00:14:56,520 Speaker 4: you can walk, but I'm going to follow you those 297 00:14:56,560 --> 00:14:59,440 Speaker 4: two blocks. She was like, okay, mommy, no problem. Meanwhile, 298 00:14:59,440 --> 00:15:01,320 Speaker 4: you have a their kids that might be like, oh 299 00:15:02,120 --> 00:15:06,080 Speaker 4: why can't I just can't you trust me eleven? I'm 300 00:15:06,080 --> 00:15:09,640 Speaker 4: not stupid, you know, other kids would rebel. Our kids 301 00:15:09,640 --> 00:15:14,640 Speaker 4: are so conditioned to understanding that it's for their safety 302 00:15:14,880 --> 00:15:19,400 Speaker 4: and they welcome it, especially like our oldest Madison, Madison, 303 00:15:19,440 --> 00:15:22,480 Speaker 4: when she went to college, she was like, can you 304 00:15:22,560 --> 00:15:27,840 Speaker 4: chip me? Put a chip, like, put a chip in 305 00:15:27,880 --> 00:15:29,760 Speaker 4: her arm because. 306 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,680 Speaker 9: It was almost kidnapped as a kid. They try to 307 00:15:32,680 --> 00:15:37,640 Speaker 9: grab her the door, someone face being cut. So we 308 00:15:37,800 --> 00:15:39,440 Speaker 9: are very extra. 309 00:15:39,200 --> 00:15:40,040 Speaker 1: When it comes to our kids. 310 00:15:40,080 --> 00:15:42,000 Speaker 9: And then you know, Charlemagne and you guys know things 311 00:15:42,000 --> 00:15:44,000 Speaker 9: that has happened, you know, behind the scenes, but we're 312 00:15:44,120 --> 00:15:45,480 Speaker 9: very careful when it comes to the kids. 313 00:15:45,560 --> 00:15:48,240 Speaker 4: Yeah, when I was nine, a man tried to abduct 314 00:15:48,320 --> 00:15:50,680 Speaker 4: me and it was awful. 315 00:15:50,880 --> 00:15:52,960 Speaker 1: She was walking the door and all that. 316 00:15:53,280 --> 00:15:56,320 Speaker 4: He choked me out like he he had a change 317 00:15:56,320 --> 00:15:58,680 Speaker 4: of clothes hidden. He was caught. 318 00:15:58,800 --> 00:15:59,400 Speaker 7: He was caught. 319 00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:02,800 Speaker 4: But that's the h's Yeah, that story is in the book. 320 00:16:03,160 --> 00:16:06,000 Speaker 4: But you know, so I experience, I understand. I come 321 00:16:06,040 --> 00:16:09,520 Speaker 4: from a place where I understand that the worst can 322 00:16:09,560 --> 00:16:12,920 Speaker 4: happen to you, you know, because we go through lifehily like, 323 00:16:12,960 --> 00:16:14,880 Speaker 4: oh no, that happens to other people, you know, other 324 00:16:14,920 --> 00:16:17,200 Speaker 4: people go through things like that. I've been through so 325 00:16:17,280 --> 00:16:21,640 Speaker 4: much that I understand that the worst can happen to you. 326 00:16:22,280 --> 00:16:26,160 Speaker 4: So I protect my kids with vigilance because of that 327 00:16:26,600 --> 00:16:28,040 Speaker 4: personal knowledge that I have of it. 328 00:16:28,120 --> 00:16:30,320 Speaker 2: Yeah, how make sure you not? You're raising the kids 329 00:16:30,320 --> 00:16:32,040 Speaker 2: out of love and not fear at all. 330 00:16:32,160 --> 00:16:36,920 Speaker 4: That's such a good question. It comes with the explanations, 331 00:16:37,280 --> 00:16:39,280 Speaker 4: do you know what I mean. I don't tell them 332 00:16:39,760 --> 00:16:43,560 Speaker 4: you can't do this and you can't do that. Why 333 00:16:43,600 --> 00:16:46,360 Speaker 4: because I said so. Let me explain to you why. 334 00:16:46,680 --> 00:16:49,680 Speaker 4: You know, sometimes we'll watch the news together, you know, 335 00:16:49,760 --> 00:16:53,200 Speaker 4: when they're at an appropriate age, at about nine years old. 336 00:16:53,280 --> 00:16:55,320 Speaker 4: You know, I think that they're mature enough to ingest 337 00:16:55,360 --> 00:16:57,800 Speaker 4: certain things. So what I do is I would record 338 00:16:57,880 --> 00:17:01,920 Speaker 4: it on my DVR and then cherry pick different stories 339 00:17:01,920 --> 00:17:04,280 Speaker 4: that I think that are appropriate, that speak to the 340 00:17:04,320 --> 00:17:08,000 Speaker 4: protective measures that we take on them, you know what 341 00:17:08,040 --> 00:17:10,240 Speaker 4: I mean. So it's like, if I see a child 342 00:17:10,320 --> 00:17:14,080 Speaker 4: abduction that's not too traumatic, I might save that and 343 00:17:14,119 --> 00:17:16,440 Speaker 4: then show it to a child that's old enough. 344 00:17:16,480 --> 00:17:16,639 Speaker 10: You know. 345 00:17:16,680 --> 00:17:18,920 Speaker 4: I did it with Madison, I did it with Logan, 346 00:17:19,240 --> 00:17:21,959 Speaker 4: and I find that they take that into their adult 347 00:17:22,000 --> 00:17:27,240 Speaker 4: lives and they're very very Madison Like, Madison walks around 348 00:17:27,280 --> 00:17:29,520 Speaker 4: like a police officer. She has a boyfriend. His name 349 00:17:29,560 --> 00:17:32,240 Speaker 4: is Andrew, and when they go into a restaurant, she's 350 00:17:32,280 --> 00:17:35,480 Speaker 4: the one that sits facing the door. She feels like 351 00:17:35,520 --> 00:17:39,800 Speaker 4: the protective force in that relationship because her head is 352 00:17:39,880 --> 00:17:42,040 Speaker 4: always on swivel, you know what I mean. She could 353 00:17:42,119 --> 00:17:45,439 Speaker 4: tell you a car that was driving six cars ahead, 354 00:17:46,320 --> 00:17:49,399 Speaker 4: you know, and she's always paying attention to license plates. 355 00:17:49,720 --> 00:17:54,000 Speaker 4: When she was young, I used to go through like 356 00:17:54,920 --> 00:17:58,360 Speaker 4: in case you get kidnapped scenarios because it's the type 357 00:17:58,359 --> 00:18:10,600 Speaker 4: of information that can save a child's life. It's the 358 00:18:10,760 --> 00:18:16,080 Speaker 4: type of information that can save a life, especially now 359 00:18:16,400 --> 00:18:20,480 Speaker 4: with all of this human trafficking and all the stories 360 00:18:20,520 --> 00:18:23,200 Speaker 4: with you know you they put like a zip a 361 00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:26,639 Speaker 4: zip tag on your on your on your door, and 362 00:18:26,680 --> 00:18:29,400 Speaker 4: they put a dollar or money near your there's there's 363 00:18:29,480 --> 00:18:33,919 Speaker 4: all these techniques. Girls are being taken. So if you 364 00:18:34,080 --> 00:18:38,560 Speaker 4: have a young girl, it is very proactive to educate 365 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:41,679 Speaker 4: them about the realities and the tricks and the cons 366 00:18:42,080 --> 00:18:45,760 Speaker 4: that people. You know, because even me, as proactive as 367 00:18:45,760 --> 00:18:48,480 Speaker 4: I try to be, that whole technique with a baby 368 00:18:48,480 --> 00:18:52,440 Speaker 4: crying outside your house, I would I would be inclined 369 00:18:52,480 --> 00:18:54,560 Speaker 4: to open the door if I hear a baby crying 370 00:18:54,600 --> 00:18:57,080 Speaker 4: and someone that sounds like a mother yelling and screaming 371 00:18:57,080 --> 00:18:59,840 Speaker 4: outside the house. I am that type of person, but 372 00:19:00,280 --> 00:19:07,679 Speaker 4: not me. But now I am, I am, but I 373 00:19:07,760 --> 00:19:10,040 Speaker 4: would my heart with my ie would be inclined to 374 00:19:10,080 --> 00:19:12,680 Speaker 4: open that door. But now with all the knowledge and 375 00:19:12,880 --> 00:19:15,520 Speaker 4: some of the good things about social media is that 376 00:19:15,920 --> 00:19:19,359 Speaker 4: so much knowledge is being spread, so now we're consuming 377 00:19:19,560 --> 00:19:23,160 Speaker 4: good information as well. So I heard that, I'm like, wow, 378 00:19:23,560 --> 00:19:27,680 Speaker 4: that's absolutely absolutely right. It jogs your thinking, It makes 379 00:19:27,720 --> 00:19:29,879 Speaker 4: you say, oh, wait a minute, I do have to 380 00:19:29,880 --> 00:19:32,960 Speaker 4: put myself first, even if someone else, a stranger, seems 381 00:19:33,000 --> 00:19:36,160 Speaker 4: to be in need. I have to prioritize myself, my home, 382 00:19:36,440 --> 00:19:40,320 Speaker 4: my family. So you know, it's it's important to spread 383 00:19:40,320 --> 00:19:42,320 Speaker 4: information and to teach your kids, even though it may 384 00:19:42,359 --> 00:19:44,480 Speaker 4: be a little scary, but you do have to do 385 00:19:44,520 --> 00:19:46,440 Speaker 4: it in a way where it doesn't incite fear. 386 00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:49,520 Speaker 7: How do y'all go ahead, How y'all pick and choose? 387 00:19:49,520 --> 00:19:51,720 Speaker 6: What do y'all like, what y'all decide to be transparent about, 388 00:19:51,800 --> 00:19:54,119 Speaker 6: because there's so much, Like you have stuff that you 389 00:19:54,119 --> 00:19:55,560 Speaker 6: have to protect them from just because they're going to 390 00:19:55,600 --> 00:19:57,440 Speaker 6: school and you guys, people know you. But then you 391 00:19:57,480 --> 00:19:59,280 Speaker 6: also have stuff that's just happening in the world that 392 00:19:59,320 --> 00:20:01,720 Speaker 6: they could encounter with their friends. Like it's just so much. 393 00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:03,840 Speaker 6: Your kids are getting older, and they're like, you know, 394 00:20:03,960 --> 00:20:06,159 Speaker 6: like they they're wanting to walk by themselves with their friends. 395 00:20:06,200 --> 00:20:07,119 Speaker 6: If it was. 396 00:20:07,160 --> 00:20:09,760 Speaker 1: Up to me, I'm transparent with everything. Right has to 397 00:20:09,760 --> 00:20:12,600 Speaker 1: hold back a lot. And the reason I think I'm streaming, well, 398 00:20:12,840 --> 00:20:13,480 Speaker 1: the reason. 399 00:20:13,200 --> 00:20:16,280 Speaker 9: I'm so transparent I'll explain. But the reason I'm so transparent. 400 00:20:17,680 --> 00:20:20,040 Speaker 7: What you mean? 401 00:20:25,560 --> 00:20:28,320 Speaker 9: But you know so so some things get you know, 402 00:20:28,800 --> 00:20:32,119 Speaker 9: like for instance, like with Logan, Right, Logan when he 403 00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:33,720 Speaker 9: was in high school used to get picked on all 404 00:20:33,720 --> 00:20:34,040 Speaker 9: the time. 405 00:20:34,400 --> 00:20:36,600 Speaker 1: Right, But he used to get picked on. Guess for 406 00:20:36,640 --> 00:20:41,760 Speaker 1: what reason? No, because because Charlemagne, yes, yes, so. 407 00:20:43,920 --> 00:20:56,280 Speaker 3: When you gave me the ask, that's why. 408 00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:52,520 Speaker 1: He gave me the buck cake when he gave me 409 00:20:53,000 --> 00:20:56,040 Speaker 1: not much better. You know what I mean. 410 00:21:01,000 --> 00:21:01,760 Speaker 5: I'm not about to hate. 411 00:21:04,400 --> 00:21:06,360 Speaker 1: He used to get made fun of it because of that. 412 00:21:06,440 --> 00:21:08,679 Speaker 9: So, but the reason I'm so transparent is there's so 413 00:21:08,760 --> 00:21:11,720 Speaker 9: many families and people dealing with the same things but 414 00:21:11,840 --> 00:21:14,120 Speaker 9: never want to talk about it. Scared to So that's 415 00:21:14,160 --> 00:21:16,560 Speaker 9: why I talked about the orgasm thing in the first book. 416 00:21:16,760 --> 00:21:18,600 Speaker 9: That's why in this in the second. But we talk 417 00:21:18,640 --> 00:21:23,200 Speaker 9: about you know the time that from the. 418 00:21:24,480 --> 00:21:26,760 Speaker 1: No, no, not every. 419 00:21:28,200 --> 00:21:29,960 Speaker 2: Every you want to do some. 420 00:21:33,280 --> 00:21:35,000 Speaker 9: Even like in this book, we talk about the time 421 00:21:35,080 --> 00:21:40,640 Speaker 9: that that uh, Logan found a bloody condom at one 422 00:21:40,640 --> 00:21:44,640 Speaker 9: of his friend's house, so he can't, but he's he's 423 00:21:44,640 --> 00:21:46,879 Speaker 9: comfortable while you're looking at that it wasn't mine. 424 00:21:49,200 --> 00:21:58,560 Speaker 4: He's like, oh, he found right friend's house and and 425 00:21:58,640 --> 00:22:02,120 Speaker 4: he was like maybe nine years old, nine years old. 426 00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:03,320 Speaker 4: He was about nine years old. 427 00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:05,879 Speaker 5: But he was comfortable enough to keep in the basement. 428 00:22:06,080 --> 00:22:08,639 Speaker 4: And the little boy had an older brother. 429 00:22:09,680 --> 00:22:10,400 Speaker 1: Yeah, when char. 430 00:22:10,640 --> 00:22:18,640 Speaker 9: Gave so she had that's when we had the sex 431 00:22:18,680 --> 00:22:21,800 Speaker 9: talk and had to have the sex talk with Logan 432 00:22:21,920 --> 00:22:22,520 Speaker 9: and Madison. 433 00:22:22,560 --> 00:22:25,639 Speaker 3: What kind of sex talk though it wasn't a backdoor 434 00:22:25,720 --> 00:22:29,040 Speaker 3: sex talk that they just birds and bees and. 435 00:22:32,640 --> 00:22:36,760 Speaker 4: They got a full blown, okay sex talk. They had 436 00:22:36,800 --> 00:22:40,120 Speaker 4: to understand because if you leave it back. 437 00:22:39,960 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 2: Doing sex, That's what I'm really trying to figure out. 438 00:22:42,520 --> 00:22:45,680 Speaker 2: Why was the condon bloody? I'm really when somebody ran red, Like. 439 00:22:46,359 --> 00:22:54,760 Speaker 8: Yeah, somebody just ripped somebody butt open, somebody ran a red. 440 00:22:54,920 --> 00:22:56,360 Speaker 7: Don't be like the first time thing. 441 00:22:56,560 --> 00:22:59,480 Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, but no, they at that point I found 442 00:22:59,520 --> 00:23:01,640 Speaker 4: that they were all enough and mature enough, and you're 443 00:23:02,000 --> 00:23:05,760 Speaker 4: they're encountering things. Now, these conversations are being had amongst 444 00:23:05,760 --> 00:23:08,680 Speaker 4: their peers. And I knew that if I didn't set 445 00:23:08,680 --> 00:23:11,920 Speaker 4: them straight, that they were going to be absorbing all 446 00:23:11,920 --> 00:23:16,800 Speaker 4: of this wrong information and wrong ideas. So I told 447 00:23:16,880 --> 00:23:23,040 Speaker 4: them sex feels good. It's a pleasureful experience. God made 448 00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:26,960 Speaker 4: us that way because God wants us to reproduce. He 449 00:23:27,000 --> 00:23:30,280 Speaker 4: wants us to create offspring. So he made it something 450 00:23:30,320 --> 00:23:33,040 Speaker 4: that we would enjoy. But it's meant for someone that 451 00:23:33,080 --> 00:23:37,560 Speaker 4: you love, and that's the reason why. So they're like, oh, okay, 452 00:23:37,840 --> 00:23:42,560 Speaker 4: so what is it like and what did you say? Okay, 453 00:23:42,600 --> 00:23:45,600 Speaker 4: if I'm being honest, I told them that there is 454 00:23:45,640 --> 00:23:47,920 Speaker 4: a penis, and there is a vagina and it does 455 00:23:48,680 --> 00:23:51,320 Speaker 4: slide in and out. And my son Logan was like, 456 00:23:51,480 --> 00:24:02,639 Speaker 4: so like this, yeah, they're bad. Yes, they're eleven about 457 00:24:02,640 --> 00:24:06,960 Speaker 4: they're about eleven and nine him that I'll never forget 458 00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:08,840 Speaker 4: since you asked. He was like, so is it like 459 00:24:08,840 --> 00:24:16,920 Speaker 4: like I was like, yeah, something like that. I said, 460 00:24:17,200 --> 00:24:21,800 Speaker 4: you know, some people look at it as a negative thing. No, no, no, 461 00:24:21,880 --> 00:24:24,679 Speaker 4: he really didn't know. He really didn't. He really didn't 462 00:24:25,080 --> 00:24:27,640 Speaker 4: even even like my eleven year old son right now, 463 00:24:28,400 --> 00:24:31,320 Speaker 4: he does not know. He asked me three days ago, 464 00:24:31,640 --> 00:24:34,359 Speaker 4: like what does sexual mean, I said, it's not for you. 465 00:24:34,400 --> 00:24:36,280 Speaker 4: It's not for you to understand right now. So when 466 00:24:36,280 --> 00:24:39,679 Speaker 4: they asked me questions that I don't want them to 467 00:24:39,760 --> 00:24:43,040 Speaker 4: know about. And he's older than Logan was, But now 468 00:24:43,080 --> 00:24:46,359 Speaker 4: with I have a better grip on his friends and 469 00:24:46,400 --> 00:24:48,639 Speaker 4: a grip on what he's exposed to on his phone 470 00:24:48,680 --> 00:24:52,679 Speaker 4: and whatnot in Parameter's boundaries, So I'm really abreast of 471 00:24:52,760 --> 00:24:56,040 Speaker 4: what he knows and what he doesn't in our lines 472 00:24:56,080 --> 00:25:01,119 Speaker 4: of communication are way way better. Like he like those kids. 473 00:25:01,160 --> 00:25:03,560 Speaker 4: They come to me every day and when they get 474 00:25:03,560 --> 00:25:06,320 Speaker 4: home from school, either for a half an hour an hour, 475 00:25:06,400 --> 00:25:09,280 Speaker 4: depending on what activity they have. Afterwards, they have their turns. 476 00:25:09,320 --> 00:25:11,200 Speaker 4: They sit at the foot of my bed, they lay 477 00:25:11,200 --> 00:25:13,080 Speaker 4: down or they sit down and they tell me about 478 00:25:13,080 --> 00:25:15,159 Speaker 4: their entire day. They tell me the best part of 479 00:25:15,160 --> 00:25:17,640 Speaker 4: their day, the worst part of their day, and one 480 00:25:17,720 --> 00:25:19,720 Speaker 4: kind thing that they did for someone else that day. 481 00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,920 Speaker 4: So that's just our routine, that's our ritual. And they 482 00:25:22,920 --> 00:25:25,520 Speaker 4: tell me everything, and you would be shocked and appalled 483 00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:29,760 Speaker 4: to know the things that they divulge. But it's because 484 00:25:29,800 --> 00:25:33,000 Speaker 4: we create that safe space, We create that soft place 485 00:25:33,000 --> 00:25:36,239 Speaker 4: to land, We create a no judgment zone and you 486 00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:39,719 Speaker 4: could tell me anything. It could be the world's worst. 487 00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:42,520 Speaker 4: I will never ever judge you. I will help you 488 00:25:42,600 --> 00:25:45,359 Speaker 4: fix it. We'll extract all the lessons, everything that you 489 00:25:45,400 --> 00:25:47,840 Speaker 4: need to learn from it, whether you were wrong, whether 490 00:25:47,920 --> 00:25:51,200 Speaker 4: you weren't whatever. It is like, this is your safe 491 00:25:51,400 --> 00:25:56,040 Speaker 4: space and they have that foundation. So they share, they share, 492 00:25:56,160 --> 00:25:57,760 Speaker 4: and we take that time like we share. 493 00:25:58,160 --> 00:26:01,640 Speaker 8: Yeah, you have six Kames, So was there anything because 494 00:26:01,680 --> 00:26:05,159 Speaker 8: y'all have all age groups, So is there anything that 495 00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:09,840 Speaker 8: you felt like in the beginning, y'all didn't know until 496 00:26:09,880 --> 00:26:13,000 Speaker 8: y'all got to that six kid of course, Like what 497 00:26:13,080 --> 00:26:15,120 Speaker 8: were some of the I'll give you an example. 498 00:26:15,280 --> 00:26:17,159 Speaker 5: You didn't know? You just was like, well we may 499 00:26:17,160 --> 00:26:18,080 Speaker 5: and Rashan winging. 500 00:26:17,960 --> 00:26:20,560 Speaker 4: This, I'll give you. I'll give you an example. But 501 00:26:20,640 --> 00:26:22,840 Speaker 4: to speak to what you said, like we wrote a book, 502 00:26:23,440 --> 00:26:26,240 Speaker 4: that doesn't mean that we know everything, and it doesn't 503 00:26:26,240 --> 00:26:29,439 Speaker 4: mean that it's not an evolution. It doesn't mean that 504 00:26:29,440 --> 00:26:32,440 Speaker 4: we're still learning every single day. Like I said earlier, 505 00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:35,520 Speaker 4: it's a sense of community where we share our experiences 506 00:26:35,840 --> 00:26:38,840 Speaker 4: and the wins and the losses so that other people 507 00:26:39,080 --> 00:26:43,480 Speaker 4: can understand they're not alone. And it comes in all shades, 508 00:26:43,560 --> 00:26:49,080 Speaker 4: all forms, all fashions, all financial groups, we all speak 509 00:26:49,119 --> 00:26:55,479 Speaker 4: a universal universal language as parents. With Logan, so one 510 00:26:55,520 --> 00:26:57,240 Speaker 4: of one of the fails, and this was something that 511 00:26:57,240 --> 00:27:01,919 Speaker 4: we disagreed on. So it was the explaining everything to 512 00:27:02,000 --> 00:27:04,320 Speaker 4: the kids. I have the patience to do it. And 513 00:27:04,359 --> 00:27:07,440 Speaker 4: he really is a because I said so type of guy. 514 00:27:08,119 --> 00:27:12,640 Speaker 4: And it worked beautifully with Madison, but with Logan from 515 00:27:12,680 --> 00:27:14,919 Speaker 4: a young age, I would explain everything to him and 516 00:27:15,000 --> 00:27:16,080 Speaker 4: he's a MoMA's boy. 517 00:27:16,640 --> 00:27:18,960 Speaker 1: Time's thirty and he tells. 518 00:27:18,760 --> 00:27:23,480 Speaker 4: Us it is that boy, Like we have a thing, 519 00:27:23,840 --> 00:27:25,479 Speaker 4: you know, and I have a different thing with all 520 00:27:25,480 --> 00:27:27,800 Speaker 4: of my kids, but me and him have our thing. 521 00:27:28,000 --> 00:27:30,920 Speaker 4: Like he calls me at all times of the day, 522 00:27:31,000 --> 00:27:32,639 Speaker 4: all time. He will call me at three o'clock in 523 00:27:32,680 --> 00:27:34,719 Speaker 4: the morning, like at twelve o'clock in the afternoon, and 524 00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:37,800 Speaker 4: she's like, yeah, what's up, mom, what's going on? You're good? Yeah, 525 00:27:37,800 --> 00:27:39,679 Speaker 4: I'm good. I was just at the club home. I'm 526 00:27:39,680 --> 00:27:42,280 Speaker 4: about to FaceTime you, Lucas and Andrew. Here, take a look, 527 00:27:42,320 --> 00:27:44,960 Speaker 4: take a look, and I'm like, what's up? Sleep is up? 528 00:27:45,119 --> 00:27:47,600 Speaker 4: But okay, you know what I mean. Like we're very 529 00:27:47,800 --> 00:27:51,360 Speaker 4: very close. But it kind of went wrong with him 530 00:27:51,840 --> 00:27:54,920 Speaker 4: because what we found was that we created an environment 531 00:27:55,240 --> 00:27:59,119 Speaker 4: where he felt that he was entitled to an explanation, 532 00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:04,800 Speaker 4: and he felt as though because we gave him too 533 00:28:04,920 --> 00:28:08,879 Speaker 4: safe of a space that he could challenge me. And 534 00:28:08,920 --> 00:28:12,600 Speaker 4: he can challenge a decision that I made. And he's 535 00:28:12,800 --> 00:28:19,119 Speaker 4: very and he's very intelligent. He's very, very intelligent. So 536 00:28:20,080 --> 00:28:22,720 Speaker 4: Rashwan always says that I'm like a lawyer, right, he 537 00:28:22,760 --> 00:28:25,560 Speaker 4: says it all the time. I know what it feels 538 00:28:25,560 --> 00:28:27,760 Speaker 4: like because I have a logan and logan lawyers me, 539 00:28:28,160 --> 00:28:28,880 Speaker 4: do you know what I mean? 540 00:28:28,960 --> 00:28:31,280 Speaker 1: So they do it each other all day long, Yes, 541 00:28:31,359 --> 00:28:31,760 Speaker 1: all day. 542 00:28:31,680 --> 00:28:34,040 Speaker 4: Long, and in a lot of ways, I enjoy it 543 00:28:34,119 --> 00:28:37,640 Speaker 4: because I feel like he really does challenge me, and 544 00:28:37,680 --> 00:28:39,200 Speaker 4: he's one of the only people that I feel like 545 00:28:39,320 --> 00:28:42,240 Speaker 4: does that in my life. And I love to see 546 00:28:42,280 --> 00:28:44,880 Speaker 4: the mental exercise. I love to see how his brain 547 00:28:44,960 --> 00:28:46,560 Speaker 4: is moving and how he's getting around the things that 548 00:28:46,600 --> 00:28:49,240 Speaker 4: I'm saying and things like that. So it's good at 549 00:28:49,240 --> 00:28:51,520 Speaker 4: his adult age now because he's twenty one, But when 550 00:28:51,520 --> 00:28:54,360 Speaker 4: he was a child, it wasn't acceptable because I'm going 551 00:28:54,360 --> 00:28:57,800 Speaker 4: to explain because this is what I do. But now 552 00:28:57,960 --> 00:29:02,280 Speaker 4: you're not understanding that that's a grace that I show you. 553 00:29:02,960 --> 00:29:05,680 Speaker 4: It's not something that you're entitled to. This is a 554 00:29:05,760 --> 00:29:09,440 Speaker 4: courtesy that I'm extending to you, but you're not entitled. 555 00:29:09,760 --> 00:29:14,360 Speaker 4: So we had to dial that back to boundaries. And 556 00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:17,560 Speaker 4: then we had to teach boundaries and let him know 557 00:29:17,720 --> 00:29:23,360 Speaker 4: his place because he started to misunderstand his place. So 558 00:29:23,440 --> 00:29:27,520 Speaker 4: that was that was a fail in a sense. And 559 00:29:28,520 --> 00:29:30,320 Speaker 4: Rashalmoud always look at me like see I told you, 560 00:29:30,880 --> 00:29:32,320 Speaker 4: Like see I told you because. 561 00:29:32,040 --> 00:29:32,640 Speaker 1: He's a bad guy. 562 00:29:32,680 --> 00:29:35,320 Speaker 9: Because now I got to go discipline that, right, So 563 00:29:35,360 --> 00:29:36,680 Speaker 9: now me and Logan get into it. 564 00:29:36,800 --> 00:29:38,400 Speaker 2: And now you can't beat Logan because Logan. 565 00:29:41,120 --> 00:29:42,840 Speaker 9: So now I got a discipline Logan, and then me 566 00:29:42,840 --> 00:29:44,600 Speaker 9: and Logan get into it. But one thing about Logan 567 00:29:44,640 --> 00:29:46,520 Speaker 9: and all of our kids, which is the craziest thing, 568 00:29:46,600 --> 00:29:50,120 Speaker 9: is they're very forgiven. Like with Logan, I have to 569 00:29:50,120 --> 00:29:52,960 Speaker 9: get sometimes so disrespectful for him to understand. And the 570 00:29:53,040 --> 00:29:54,640 Speaker 9: next day he's like, hey Dad, what's up. And I'm like, 571 00:29:54,680 --> 00:29:56,800 Speaker 9: hey Dad, what's up. But that's how he is, and 572 00:29:56,840 --> 00:29:59,160 Speaker 9: he just has conversations. But we have those conversations and 573 00:29:59,200 --> 00:30:02,000 Speaker 9: we understand and we talk. But he's the one that 574 00:30:02,320 --> 00:30:03,120 Speaker 9: just like his mom. 575 00:30:03,000 --> 00:30:04,240 Speaker 7: Did you fail like a failure? 576 00:30:05,080 --> 00:30:07,840 Speaker 4: No? No, I didn't feel like a failure, but I 577 00:30:07,960 --> 00:30:12,200 Speaker 4: knew that that technique wasn't wasn't necessarily fail, but it 578 00:30:12,240 --> 00:30:16,200 Speaker 4: needed tweaking. So then we had our other four and 579 00:30:16,200 --> 00:30:18,560 Speaker 4: there was a huge gap. There's about nine years between 580 00:30:18,560 --> 00:30:23,840 Speaker 4: Logan and London. So I wanted to maintain what I 581 00:30:23,920 --> 00:30:26,040 Speaker 4: always believed in and how I was raised, but I 582 00:30:26,080 --> 00:30:28,920 Speaker 4: wanted to implement some of because I told you so 583 00:30:29,120 --> 00:30:31,520 Speaker 4: as well, Like I am going to explain to you, 584 00:30:31,560 --> 00:30:33,120 Speaker 4: but I'm going to let you know that it is 585 00:30:33,160 --> 00:30:36,200 Speaker 4: because I'm showing you grace and it's because I respect you, 586 00:30:36,480 --> 00:30:38,360 Speaker 4: So in turn, you have to respect me, and you 587 00:30:38,400 --> 00:30:40,280 Speaker 4: have to respect the decision and we can talk about 588 00:30:40,320 --> 00:30:42,360 Speaker 4: it as long as it's coming from a good place. 589 00:30:42,360 --> 00:30:45,880 Speaker 4: And I'm not sensing any attitude from you, any entitlement 590 00:30:45,920 --> 00:30:48,400 Speaker 4: from you, or anything that I don't like to feel 591 00:30:48,440 --> 00:30:50,040 Speaker 4: as we sit here and discuss it. So you got 592 00:30:50,080 --> 00:30:53,360 Speaker 4: to make sure you keep it right. And my kids 593 00:30:53,720 --> 00:30:56,920 Speaker 4: get it. So this pack of three, because Peyton's three 594 00:30:57,000 --> 00:30:59,920 Speaker 4: years old, but my eleven, my ten, and my eight, 595 00:31:00,480 --> 00:31:03,400 Speaker 4: they get it. Like I tell them, if they were 596 00:31:03,440 --> 00:31:06,160 Speaker 4: really curious, they might question, and then after I say 597 00:31:06,160 --> 00:31:09,800 Speaker 4: it again, they're like okay, absolutely, whatever it is. And 598 00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:13,000 Speaker 4: so it's it's through that trial and error with Madison 599 00:31:13,040 --> 00:31:16,120 Speaker 4: and Logan that were able to take all the good stuff, 600 00:31:16,680 --> 00:31:18,440 Speaker 4: you know, all the good stuff and pour it into 601 00:31:18,520 --> 00:31:20,520 Speaker 4: this second batch of kids. 602 00:31:21,120 --> 00:31:23,040 Speaker 7: No, go ahead, I thought, I'm asking so much. 603 00:31:23,160 --> 00:31:25,440 Speaker 5: So no, it's okay. 604 00:31:26,240 --> 00:31:39,000 Speaker 8: So in the beginning, So going back to something you 605 00:31:39,000 --> 00:31:41,760 Speaker 8: said earlier, you were saying that the past two years 606 00:31:41,840 --> 00:31:46,200 Speaker 8: was very traumatic and not getting into that. How challenging 607 00:31:46,360 --> 00:31:49,400 Speaker 8: was it writing this book? Like was it ever moments 608 00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:52,720 Speaker 8: where you uh amersha or just you like broke down, 609 00:31:52,880 --> 00:31:56,000 Speaker 8: like not like giving up, but it was challenging for 610 00:31:56,040 --> 00:31:58,640 Speaker 8: you to get deep into any you know, any of 611 00:31:58,640 --> 00:32:01,760 Speaker 8: the chapters or what you win through within the pastry year. 612 00:32:01,840 --> 00:32:06,440 Speaker 4: You know what, I'll be honest with you, no pun intended, 613 00:32:06,480 --> 00:32:09,960 Speaker 4: but I'm an open book. I'm not a private person. 614 00:32:10,200 --> 00:32:13,200 Speaker 4: I've never been a very private person. And it's because 615 00:32:13,240 --> 00:32:17,760 Speaker 4: i feel as though the value in life is truth. 616 00:32:18,520 --> 00:32:21,120 Speaker 4: You know, even if it's not pretty. You know, there's 617 00:32:21,160 --> 00:32:23,920 Speaker 4: no value to anything if it's not honest, if it's 618 00:32:23,920 --> 00:32:28,080 Speaker 4: not true, if it's not transparent, if it's bs, it's worthless. 619 00:32:28,280 --> 00:32:30,320 Speaker 4: You know, if you wrap everything in a pretty bow. 620 00:32:30,800 --> 00:32:33,920 Speaker 4: It's worthless because who can relate to you? Nobody. I 621 00:32:33,920 --> 00:32:36,320 Speaker 4: can't relate to people that appear to be perfect or 622 00:32:36,320 --> 00:32:39,240 Speaker 4: pretend to be perfect, because I don't know you. I 623 00:32:39,280 --> 00:32:41,840 Speaker 4: don't know anybody like you, you know what I mean. So 624 00:32:42,840 --> 00:32:47,000 Speaker 4: anytime that I'm honest or I'm vulnerable about something, to me, 625 00:32:47,160 --> 00:32:50,840 Speaker 4: it's like giving a little gift from myself. It's sharing 626 00:32:50,920 --> 00:32:53,600 Speaker 4: something that I know other people wouldn't share because they'd 627 00:32:53,640 --> 00:32:57,360 Speaker 4: be too embarrassed or it disrupts the image that they're 628 00:32:57,360 --> 00:33:01,600 Speaker 4: trying to present, so that I don't respect. So it's 629 00:33:01,720 --> 00:33:04,160 Speaker 4: very easy for me to tell my truth from where 630 00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:06,200 Speaker 4: I genuinely come from. 631 00:33:06,320 --> 00:33:08,440 Speaker 2: You did you'll have a family mission statement? 632 00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:09,560 Speaker 7: Yes? 633 00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:12,560 Speaker 2: What is the mission statement? And tell people the importance of. 634 00:33:12,520 --> 00:33:14,040 Speaker 9: That well, just so we know, we don't have it 635 00:33:14,080 --> 00:33:15,440 Speaker 9: on our wall and then make the kids read it 636 00:33:15,440 --> 00:33:16,240 Speaker 9: when they walk in the house. 637 00:33:16,600 --> 00:33:19,120 Speaker 1: It's not like that. 638 00:33:19,640 --> 00:33:22,080 Speaker 9: So our mission statement is just something that we, you know, 639 00:33:22,160 --> 00:33:24,840 Speaker 9: as a family, we all live by, right, And I'll 640 00:33:24,840 --> 00:33:26,720 Speaker 9: read some of them. And the reason is is we 641 00:33:26,840 --> 00:33:29,320 Speaker 9: are a close unit, right, So if you see us together, 642 00:33:29,360 --> 00:33:29,880 Speaker 9: we're all. 643 00:33:29,760 --> 00:33:30,560 Speaker 1: Always out together. 644 00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:32,960 Speaker 9: You see me the other day with Jackson, you've seen 645 00:33:33,000 --> 00:33:34,520 Speaker 9: me before and Charlamage seen before. 646 00:33:34,560 --> 00:33:36,280 Speaker 1: So the mission statement is we are a unit. Right, 647 00:33:36,280 --> 00:33:38,480 Speaker 1: we all ride together like we are really a unit, 648 00:33:38,520 --> 00:33:38,960 Speaker 1: a unit. 649 00:33:39,520 --> 00:33:43,560 Speaker 9: I'm an only child, so I'm I'm heavy into taking 650 00:33:43,600 --> 00:33:44,280 Speaker 9: care of each other. 651 00:33:44,560 --> 00:33:44,880 Speaker 1: Right. 652 00:33:45,280 --> 00:33:48,280 Speaker 9: We respect each other, of course, it's simple, like we 653 00:33:48,320 --> 00:33:50,200 Speaker 9: make sure that, you know, we respect each other's feeling. 654 00:33:50,280 --> 00:33:51,560 Speaker 1: We always have each other's backs. 655 00:33:51,560 --> 00:33:53,920 Speaker 9: That's one thing that we always do, and it's you know, 656 00:33:54,000 --> 00:33:55,959 Speaker 9: sometimes when we have conversations up here, I always talk 657 00:33:55,960 --> 00:33:57,960 Speaker 9: about my kids. So when they see stuff on social media, 658 00:33:58,320 --> 00:34:00,840 Speaker 9: at times I have to stop them because they will 659 00:34:00,880 --> 00:34:01,920 Speaker 9: go in, especially. 660 00:34:01,640 --> 00:34:05,520 Speaker 1: Logan Logan, Oh yeah, we always. 661 00:34:05,240 --> 00:34:07,320 Speaker 9: Loved uplift each other and pointing out the good in 662 00:34:07,360 --> 00:34:10,000 Speaker 9: one another. Right, So we see that more, especially with 663 00:34:10,040 --> 00:34:12,040 Speaker 9: our girls in dance because they compete against each other 664 00:34:12,080 --> 00:34:13,960 Speaker 9: a lot. So when they do, we have to make 665 00:34:13,960 --> 00:34:16,360 Speaker 9: sure that regardless of what happens. Like a couple of 666 00:34:16,400 --> 00:34:19,400 Speaker 9: weeks ago, London lost and we thought London got jerked. 667 00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:21,960 Speaker 9: So I told you know, I had a conversation with Brooklyn, 668 00:34:22,080 --> 00:34:23,600 Speaker 9: and Brooklyn was like that, don't worry, I'm gonna get 669 00:34:23,600 --> 00:34:25,320 Speaker 9: first and second four And she went out there and 670 00:34:25,360 --> 00:34:26,279 Speaker 9: bust ask that first and. 671 00:34:26,280 --> 00:34:28,600 Speaker 4: Second he got first place and second. 672 00:34:28,280 --> 00:34:30,120 Speaker 9: Again you know, gave the first place to her sister. 673 00:34:30,200 --> 00:34:32,839 Speaker 9: Because that's what it was. We represent each other at 674 00:34:32,880 --> 00:34:35,200 Speaker 9: all times. That's how it always is. So we always 675 00:34:35,200 --> 00:34:37,439 Speaker 9: tell our kids if we're not there, you make sure 676 00:34:37,480 --> 00:34:39,360 Speaker 9: that those parents come back and say, oh my gosh, 677 00:34:39,360 --> 00:34:40,400 Speaker 9: she was such a pleasure. 678 00:34:40,480 --> 00:34:43,440 Speaker 1: He was polite, he was this even with Jackson at 679 00:34:43,440 --> 00:34:43,800 Speaker 1: the game. 680 00:34:44,200 --> 00:34:46,399 Speaker 9: You know, Jackson said thank you a million one time, 681 00:34:46,440 --> 00:34:48,160 Speaker 9: so you said hello million one time. 682 00:34:48,040 --> 00:34:50,080 Speaker 1: To you, because that's what he's taught to do, that you. 683 00:34:50,080 --> 00:34:54,879 Speaker 4: Show respect one second before you go on with that. 684 00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:58,439 Speaker 4: My goal for my kids is that when they leave 685 00:34:58,480 --> 00:35:01,520 Speaker 4: our house, I want everyone that they come in contact 686 00:35:01,520 --> 00:35:04,200 Speaker 4: with to know that they're well loved. Do you know 687 00:35:04,239 --> 00:35:06,080 Speaker 4: what I mean? Like, I want them to know that 688 00:35:06,080 --> 00:35:09,120 Speaker 4: they're well loved. What we teach you inside this house, 689 00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:14,000 Speaker 4: you exemplify outside of this house. And it's so interesting 690 00:35:14,080 --> 00:35:16,279 Speaker 4: because you know, as parents, we have a goal, you know, 691 00:35:16,640 --> 00:35:20,240 Speaker 4: and these are goals that we vocalize to one another. 692 00:35:20,719 --> 00:35:24,600 Speaker 4: So when we get calls from other parents when our 693 00:35:24,640 --> 00:35:29,880 Speaker 4: kids are on a playdate, teachers principles. Both sets of 694 00:35:29,960 --> 00:35:32,880 Speaker 4: kids went to a new school and we got calls 695 00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:35,520 Speaker 4: from like the parent, the teachers, like what are you 696 00:35:35,560 --> 00:35:38,160 Speaker 4: guys doing in that house? What are you doing with 697 00:35:38,200 --> 00:35:41,480 Speaker 4: these kids? Like I've never seen this before, and all 698 00:35:41,520 --> 00:35:44,239 Speaker 4: three of them are like this. It lets you know 699 00:35:44,400 --> 00:35:48,760 Speaker 4: that you're doing something right, you're doing something meaningful. Those 700 00:35:48,840 --> 00:35:54,000 Speaker 4: teachers know that they're well loved, and of course other 701 00:35:54,120 --> 00:35:57,720 Speaker 4: children are well loved. It's not that, but it's coming 702 00:35:57,920 --> 00:36:01,520 Speaker 4: from a mental space that you understand. And like what 703 00:36:01,560 --> 00:36:05,640 Speaker 4: we talked about earlier about articulating words and things, when 704 00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:08,440 Speaker 4: you articulate something to a child and you do it 705 00:36:08,480 --> 00:36:11,480 Speaker 4: in a way where they understand what it means and 706 00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:14,279 Speaker 4: what their actions mean. Because you can love your child 707 00:36:14,320 --> 00:36:16,399 Speaker 4: to death, you could take a bullet for them. 708 00:36:16,400 --> 00:36:16,640 Speaker 7: You do. 709 00:36:16,760 --> 00:36:19,120 Speaker 4: You work hard, you hustle, you do everything for your kids. 710 00:36:19,200 --> 00:36:21,759 Speaker 4: You love your kids, but they could still go out 711 00:36:21,800 --> 00:36:25,280 Speaker 4: and be a menace because the lessons may be lost. 712 00:36:25,520 --> 00:36:27,439 Speaker 4: And these are things that a lot of parents don't 713 00:36:27,440 --> 00:36:30,680 Speaker 4: put into perspective when raising children because what do we 714 00:36:30,760 --> 00:36:33,880 Speaker 4: usually do. We take it. We take, like, you know, 715 00:36:33,880 --> 00:36:35,279 Speaker 4: an idea, and we throw it up against the wall 716 00:36:35,280 --> 00:36:36,560 Speaker 4: and we see if it sticks or not. 717 00:36:36,760 --> 00:36:37,439 Speaker 7: You know what I mean? 718 00:36:37,520 --> 00:36:41,160 Speaker 4: Oh that worked, Oh that didn't okay, But a lot 719 00:36:41,160 --> 00:36:44,600 Speaker 4: of people don't have something tangible that they can go 720 00:36:44,719 --> 00:36:48,279 Speaker 4: back to and be like, this is this is this 721 00:36:48,360 --> 00:36:50,560 Speaker 4: is a way to create a foundation, This is a 722 00:36:50,600 --> 00:36:53,360 Speaker 4: way to create a structure. And because we had so 723 00:36:53,400 --> 00:36:56,400 Speaker 4: many ups and downs, we were able to do that 724 00:36:56,480 --> 00:36:57,680 Speaker 4: and put it in one place. 725 00:36:58,920 --> 00:37:00,360 Speaker 1: And I think the biggest story now hate want to 726 00:37:00,360 --> 00:37:01,400 Speaker 1: tell a story was Jackson. 727 00:37:01,480 --> 00:37:01,600 Speaker 4: Right. 728 00:37:01,640 --> 00:37:03,520 Speaker 9: So we had a parent teacher's night a couple of 729 00:37:03,520 --> 00:37:05,680 Speaker 9: weeks ago and a teacher came up to me. 730 00:37:06,719 --> 00:37:08,560 Speaker 1: The teacher that I had no idea you know who? 731 00:37:08,560 --> 00:37:11,160 Speaker 9: He was a step night r. So he walks up 732 00:37:11,200 --> 00:37:12,680 Speaker 9: to me. He was like, are you Jackson's dad? And 733 00:37:12,719 --> 00:37:13,320 Speaker 9: I'm like yeah. 734 00:37:13,840 --> 00:37:15,640 Speaker 1: When a teacher usually asked, that's usually some bs. 735 00:37:15,719 --> 00:37:15,839 Speaker 2: Right. 736 00:37:15,840 --> 00:37:17,400 Speaker 9: So I'm like, oh, hey, we go what did Jackson do? 737 00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:19,279 Speaker 9: And he was like, I just want to tell you. 738 00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:22,280 Speaker 9: You know, Jackson did something that no child or adult 739 00:37:22,320 --> 00:37:23,280 Speaker 9: has done in my life. 740 00:37:23,760 --> 00:37:24,920 Speaker 1: I'm like, well, what's that? 741 00:37:25,040 --> 00:37:26,880 Speaker 9: And he was like the other day, I'm walking down 742 00:37:26,920 --> 00:37:28,320 Speaker 9: the hall and Jackson comes running up to me and 743 00:37:28,360 --> 00:37:30,200 Speaker 9: he goes, you know, are you okay? 744 00:37:30,600 --> 00:37:31,759 Speaker 1: And the teacher was like, what do you mean? He 745 00:37:31,800 --> 00:37:33,760 Speaker 1: was like, you just don't look as happy as usually 746 00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:35,759 Speaker 1: do or you are right? Is anything bothering you? Would 747 00:37:35,760 --> 00:37:37,200 Speaker 1: you like to have a conversation with me and just 748 00:37:37,239 --> 00:37:37,759 Speaker 1: talk it through. 749 00:37:42,880 --> 00:37:44,359 Speaker 9: I was like, naw, you just don't seem as happy 750 00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:46,000 Speaker 9: as you do, but don't let things stress you out. 751 00:37:46,320 --> 00:37:48,759 Speaker 1: Just pray on it and tomorrow be better, right, and 752 00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:50,160 Speaker 1: if you need to talk to me, come talk to me. 753 00:37:50,200 --> 00:37:51,839 Speaker 9: And he said Jackson ran off and he was like, 754 00:37:52,320 --> 00:37:54,400 Speaker 9: I've never had an adult or a child ever do 755 00:37:54,480 --> 00:37:55,839 Speaker 9: that to me. So he was like, whatever you're doing 756 00:37:55,840 --> 00:37:58,040 Speaker 9: at home, continue that, and you know what I mean, 757 00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:00,359 Speaker 9: that just shows what the kids are learned at home 758 00:38:00,480 --> 00:38:01,759 Speaker 9: is worth every Yeah, so. 759 00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:03,440 Speaker 2: You need to report that teacher too. He don't need 760 00:38:03,440 --> 00:38:03,920 Speaker 2: to be in school. 761 00:38:09,080 --> 00:38:16,600 Speaker 5: Was like, you got some time. So he was the 762 00:38:16,640 --> 00:38:18,279 Speaker 5: only person, I mean, London was the only person that 763 00:38:18,480 --> 00:38:19,239 Speaker 5: saw him at. 764 00:38:21,000 --> 00:38:21,280 Speaker 7: Jackson. 765 00:38:28,880 --> 00:38:31,800 Speaker 4: So that was stem night. But at the parent teacher conference, 766 00:38:32,360 --> 00:38:35,640 Speaker 4: one of the teachers said that if she could use 767 00:38:35,680 --> 00:38:39,439 Speaker 4: one word to describe Jackson, it would be grateful. And 768 00:38:40,040 --> 00:38:42,480 Speaker 4: she said, in thirty years of teaching, I've never used 769 00:38:42,480 --> 00:38:45,360 Speaker 4: that word with a child before. I said, well, what 770 00:38:45,400 --> 00:38:48,480 Speaker 4: do you mean by grateful? He says? She said, every day, 771 00:38:48,600 --> 00:38:50,879 Speaker 4: after every lesson. He comes up to me and says, 772 00:38:50,920 --> 00:38:54,520 Speaker 4: thank you for teaching me today. And I said really, 773 00:38:54,920 --> 00:38:57,160 Speaker 4: And he said, she said where, Like where did like 774 00:38:57,160 --> 00:38:58,960 Speaker 4: where does he get that from? Like what's what's like? 775 00:38:59,000 --> 00:39:03,040 Speaker 4: You know? I said, that's his own interpretation. But when 776 00:39:03,080 --> 00:39:06,360 Speaker 4: he plays sports, after every game, I tell him to 777 00:39:06,400 --> 00:39:08,920 Speaker 4: shake the referee hand and to look him in this 778 00:39:09,040 --> 00:39:11,799 Speaker 4: look him in the eye, a nice strong handshake and 779 00:39:11,800 --> 00:39:14,160 Speaker 4: say thank you. And do the same thing with your coach, 780 00:39:14,239 --> 00:39:16,400 Speaker 4: because these are people that give their time, that don't 781 00:39:16,400 --> 00:39:18,400 Speaker 4: have to give their time, and it's for you and 782 00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:21,400 Speaker 4: for your benefit and your learning and your greatness. So 783 00:39:21,719 --> 00:39:23,960 Speaker 4: you acknowledge that man or that woman and you say 784 00:39:24,000 --> 00:39:27,239 Speaker 4: thank you. So I think that that's his interpretation how 785 00:39:27,280 --> 00:39:29,920 Speaker 4: he's doing it in another way, you know what I mean. 786 00:39:30,480 --> 00:39:31,800 Speaker 5: Are such a beautiful family. 787 00:39:32,560 --> 00:39:33,640 Speaker 4: Thank you? 788 00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:36,320 Speaker 5: And this man will crashed out for any of y'all. 789 00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:40,040 Speaker 5: I know. 790 00:39:40,280 --> 00:39:41,640 Speaker 1: Behind the scenes a bunch of times. 791 00:39:41,840 --> 00:39:47,360 Speaker 9: And Jessica was like, yo, you crash out for you. 792 00:39:45,640 --> 00:39:52,759 Speaker 5: No man, tell excuse me, shut up anyway, when is 793 00:39:52,800 --> 00:39:53,719 Speaker 5: baby number seven? Come? 794 00:39:54,760 --> 00:39:57,560 Speaker 4: The shop is closed? This ship has. 795 00:39:57,480 --> 00:39:59,120 Speaker 1: Said the shop is not closed. 796 00:39:59,200 --> 00:40:04,200 Speaker 10: Okay, no, no, there's no stip snip. But I know 797 00:40:04,239 --> 00:40:09,440 Speaker 10: how not to get pregnant. No, no, I don't want 798 00:40:09,480 --> 00:40:11,000 Speaker 10: them to get. 799 00:40:11,440 --> 00:40:12,560 Speaker 7: That's the case you ever wanted. 800 00:40:13,280 --> 00:40:15,520 Speaker 4: No, I just don't think it's necessary. I know how 801 00:40:15,560 --> 00:40:22,040 Speaker 4: not to get pregnant yet the husband. 802 00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:24,880 Speaker 2: I'm sorry say that again for the wives who want 803 00:40:24,920 --> 00:40:25,320 Speaker 2: their husbands. 804 00:40:26,040 --> 00:40:30,040 Speaker 4: I don't know. Other other women may have gotten pregnant 805 00:40:30,120 --> 00:40:35,040 Speaker 4: unintentionally and have a different view, But me personally, I 806 00:40:35,160 --> 00:40:36,920 Speaker 4: just you know, like people have asked me, like, do 807 00:40:37,000 --> 00:40:38,920 Speaker 4: you want to get your tubes tied? I just like 808 00:40:39,120 --> 00:40:41,840 Speaker 4: our natural bodies and I like them to function the 809 00:40:41,880 --> 00:40:44,440 Speaker 4: way that they function. And if I can take a 810 00:40:44,560 --> 00:40:48,560 Speaker 4: human precaution to prevent a particular result, and I'll do that, 811 00:40:48,719 --> 00:40:50,680 Speaker 4: I don't. I don't think that it's for me. It's 812 00:40:50,680 --> 00:40:53,000 Speaker 4: not necessary. I absolutely understand why people do both of 813 00:40:53,000 --> 00:40:54,799 Speaker 4: those procedures, but for me, I just don't find it 814 00:40:54,840 --> 00:40:57,160 Speaker 4: to be necessary. That's all, you know. 815 00:41:02,320 --> 00:41:04,640 Speaker 3: April fifteen for it to be out in bookstores everywhere 816 00:41:04,640 --> 00:41:07,120 Speaker 3: everywhere you buy books, man Gid, thank you for pulling up. 817 00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:08,239 Speaker 7: Thank you so much. 818 00:41:08,280 --> 00:41:10,680 Speaker 4: You can pre order on Amazon right now. 819 00:41:10,640 --> 00:41:12,120 Speaker 9: And for everybody else. We just want to add this 820 00:41:12,200 --> 00:41:14,040 Speaker 9: last part. We actually wrote it with somebody that helped 821 00:41:14,120 --> 00:41:15,800 Speaker 9: us out that we'll. 822 00:41:15,680 --> 00:41:17,200 Speaker 1: Talk about that. That that helped us. 823 00:41:17,080 --> 00:41:19,680 Speaker 9: With terms and helped us with different phrases, and helped 824 00:41:19,719 --> 00:41:21,520 Speaker 9: us with made sure that we were actually doing the 825 00:41:21,560 --> 00:41:23,040 Speaker 9: right thing when it came to raising our kids. 826 00:41:23,200 --> 00:41:27,720 Speaker 4: Yeah, so we wrote it alongside a psychologist because yes, 827 00:41:28,040 --> 00:41:32,160 Speaker 4: because we wanted to make sure that our outlooks were 828 00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:38,919 Speaker 4: were on the level that I would want to put 829 00:41:38,920 --> 00:41:42,799 Speaker 4: it out to the public. I wanted the psychological research 830 00:41:43,080 --> 00:41:47,600 Speaker 4: and quarterbacking behind the way that we parent to pretty 831 00:41:47,640 --> 00:41:50,120 Speaker 4: much put a stamp on it, to know that what 832 00:41:50,239 --> 00:41:53,200 Speaker 4: we're doing not just from our personal experience driven point 833 00:41:53,239 --> 00:41:55,960 Speaker 4: of view is sound, but from a psychological point of 834 00:41:56,000 --> 00:41:58,480 Speaker 4: view is also sound. I wanted to make sure that 835 00:41:59,120 --> 00:42:02,320 Speaker 4: alongside the true truth and the transparency and the experience 836 00:42:02,600 --> 00:42:05,279 Speaker 4: that we had that backing to the book as well. 837 00:42:05,280 --> 00:42:08,239 Speaker 4: I wanted that level of value in the book as well. 838 00:42:08,440 --> 00:42:11,040 Speaker 4: So and also, you know, if you have a child 839 00:42:11,040 --> 00:42:16,279 Speaker 4: with anxiety, add ADHD, other setbacks, other disabilities, you know 840 00:42:16,320 --> 00:42:18,160 Speaker 4: we speak to you in this book as well, because 841 00:42:18,880 --> 00:42:21,960 Speaker 4: those people are very like they don't have that many resources. 842 00:42:22,239 --> 00:42:25,279 Speaker 4: This book is for anyone who is a parent, a 843 00:42:25,360 --> 00:42:27,600 Speaker 4: single parent, a parent that is. 844 00:42:27,560 --> 00:42:29,920 Speaker 1: Married, maybe about to have kids. 845 00:42:30,239 --> 00:42:34,440 Speaker 4: Someone that wants to have a child, You. 846 00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:39,439 Speaker 7: Look over, thank you, It's It's, It's, It's forever. 847 00:42:39,520 --> 00:42:41,880 Speaker 4: It's a very relatable book, and there's a lot of 848 00:42:41,920 --> 00:42:44,120 Speaker 4: exercises in the book. We kind of also created it 849 00:42:44,120 --> 00:42:47,000 Speaker 4: in like a workbook style, so there's a lot of reflections. 850 00:42:47,040 --> 00:42:48,680 Speaker 4: There's a lot of places in there for you to 851 00:42:49,080 --> 00:42:51,920 Speaker 4: answer questions so you can kind of analyze yourself and 852 00:42:52,040 --> 00:42:54,200 Speaker 4: understand your own point of view in a way of 853 00:42:54,239 --> 00:42:56,960 Speaker 4: like articulation, where if you haven't really thought about certain things, 854 00:42:57,160 --> 00:42:59,960 Speaker 4: it'll jog you to think about things. And even if 855 00:43:00,040 --> 00:43:03,279 Speaker 4: you don't do don't take our take, it encourages you 856 00:43:03,320 --> 00:43:05,120 Speaker 4: and helps you to come up with your own takes 857 00:43:05,120 --> 00:43:05,760 Speaker 4: on parenting. 858 00:43:06,360 --> 00:43:09,399 Speaker 1: So you have April fifteenth, guys, pre order it now. 859 00:43:09,440 --> 00:43:10,200 Speaker 4: Pre order it now. 860 00:43:10,400 --> 00:43:13,680 Speaker 2: My Real Family. The Casey Crew is the Breakfast Club, 861 00:43:14,080 --> 00:43:14,520 Speaker 2: Wake that. 862 00:43:14,560 --> 00:43:16,120 Speaker 1: Ass up in the morning. 863 00:43:16,440 --> 00:43:17,280 Speaker 2: Breakfast Club