1 00:00:11,440 --> 00:00:13,200 Speaker 1: Welcome back to the podcast. Thank you guys for being 2 00:00:13,200 --> 00:00:20,439 Speaker 1: here for a very rare time. We have two guests 3 00:00:20,480 --> 00:00:24,760 Speaker 1: and both of them are my relatives. Do I tell 4 00:00:24,800 --> 00:00:25,560 Speaker 1: you as a relative? 5 00:00:25,920 --> 00:00:27,920 Speaker 2: I mean I technically am your immediate family. 6 00:00:27,960 --> 00:00:29,240 Speaker 1: Now that's a relative. 7 00:00:29,400 --> 00:00:32,680 Speaker 3: I guess she's pretty relative relative. 8 00:00:33,000 --> 00:00:35,240 Speaker 1: Okay, I got my wife and then I got Amber's brother, 9 00:00:35,520 --> 00:00:39,720 Speaker 1: my brother in law, Colin, and so we're gonna answer 10 00:00:39,760 --> 00:00:41,519 Speaker 1: your questions. That's what we do on this podcast. You 11 00:00:41,560 --> 00:00:45,080 Speaker 1: email me podcast at grangersmith dot com and man puts 12 00:00:45,120 --> 00:00:48,440 Speaker 1: them together, we walk through them, and I plan on 13 00:00:48,520 --> 00:00:51,760 Speaker 1: doing that, and I also plan on uh straying a 14 00:00:51,800 --> 00:00:54,760 Speaker 1: little bit from that pattern because we have the opportunity 15 00:00:54,800 --> 00:00:57,680 Speaker 1: to have Callin, which I think is going to be 16 00:00:57,720 --> 00:01:02,400 Speaker 1: a fantastic guest here and a really good resource in 17 00:01:02,480 --> 00:01:07,120 Speaker 1: answering some of these questions. And probably that's just good 18 00:01:07,200 --> 00:01:09,760 Speaker 1: because I love you and you're one of my best friends, 19 00:01:09,760 --> 00:01:14,360 Speaker 1: but also because you've also you have unique life experience 20 00:01:14,640 --> 00:01:18,319 Speaker 1: that I don't have. Everyone brings to the table something 21 00:01:19,360 --> 00:01:22,720 Speaker 1: not this table, but everyone, everyone listening brings some kind 22 00:01:22,760 --> 00:01:26,400 Speaker 1: of unique life experience to the table that I cannot 23 00:01:26,440 --> 00:01:29,920 Speaker 1: relate to, and you can't relate to mine. But because 24 00:01:29,920 --> 00:01:33,280 Speaker 1: it's all relative, we can come at questions as we 25 00:01:33,319 --> 00:01:37,000 Speaker 1: hear them with a little bit different perspective, and I 26 00:01:37,080 --> 00:01:39,040 Speaker 1: think that's important. In all three of us will be 27 00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:43,520 Speaker 1: also be coming from a biblical perspective. So as long 28 00:01:43,560 --> 00:01:47,080 Speaker 1: as we have that, then the different ways that life 29 00:01:47,160 --> 00:01:49,840 Speaker 1: has come at us US three I think will be 30 00:01:49,920 --> 00:01:56,560 Speaker 1: unique in answering. And Colin is It's such an interesting 31 00:01:57,120 --> 00:02:00,680 Speaker 1: guest to have because as long as I've done this 32 00:02:00,720 --> 00:02:05,720 Speaker 1: podcast since twenty seventeen, many of those years you would 33 00:02:05,720 --> 00:02:10,360 Speaker 1: have been like some of the toughest questions in this podcast, 34 00:02:10,760 --> 00:02:13,720 Speaker 1: and you would have been one of the ones that 35 00:02:13,800 --> 00:02:15,560 Speaker 1: if I would have read, if you would have written 36 00:02:15,600 --> 00:02:20,399 Speaker 1: in here, for instance, two years ago, no five years ago, 37 00:02:20,400 --> 00:02:24,160 Speaker 1: we'll say, and I would have read it, this would 38 00:02:24,160 --> 00:02:26,960 Speaker 1: have been one of the questions where people go, oh, man, 39 00:02:27,680 --> 00:02:29,320 Speaker 1: that's going to be a long road for that guy. 40 00:02:29,800 --> 00:02:32,800 Speaker 1: That's going to be tough for that guy to come 41 00:02:32,800 --> 00:02:35,280 Speaker 1: out of this being Okay. 42 00:02:35,960 --> 00:02:36,720 Speaker 3: Yeah, I agree. 43 00:02:37,120 --> 00:02:40,720 Speaker 1: When I met you, you were roommates with this girl 44 00:02:40,919 --> 00:02:44,960 Speaker 1: that I was kind of dating, courting, And the first 45 00:02:44,960 --> 00:02:48,880 Speaker 1: time I visited you, you were the roommate and I 46 00:02:48,960 --> 00:02:52,160 Speaker 1: met you, which is sort of intimidating because you're, you know, 47 00:02:52,280 --> 00:02:56,080 Speaker 1: like six ten and three hundred and fifty pounds. Yeah, no, 48 00:02:56,160 --> 00:02:58,200 Speaker 1: not really. What are you like six ' five six 49 00:02:58,280 --> 00:03:00,720 Speaker 1: y four sixty four? You an extra engine. 50 00:03:00,720 --> 00:03:02,280 Speaker 3: I appreciate that. I should have taken it. 51 00:03:03,160 --> 00:03:07,080 Speaker 1: I should have just rolled. But we got along instantly 52 00:03:07,120 --> 00:03:11,120 Speaker 1: because you're everyone likes you. You're You're always fun to 53 00:03:11,120 --> 00:03:14,880 Speaker 1: be around. You're always the life of the party. So 54 00:03:15,320 --> 00:03:17,960 Speaker 1: we You had a girlfriend at the time, and I 55 00:03:18,000 --> 00:03:20,280 Speaker 1: started dating Amber, so we were it was like an 56 00:03:20,320 --> 00:03:22,839 Speaker 1: easy instant double date. We did a lot of things 57 00:03:22,880 --> 00:03:26,440 Speaker 1: together in those early years, and you being the life 58 00:03:26,440 --> 00:03:30,119 Speaker 1: of the party was also part of your problem, which 59 00:03:30,160 --> 00:03:33,240 Speaker 1: I didn't realize at the time. But the part that 60 00:03:33,400 --> 00:03:36,720 Speaker 1: was so likable about you was the part that the 61 00:03:36,760 --> 00:03:42,640 Speaker 1: world abused and you partook. Is that a word you 62 00:03:42,760 --> 00:03:46,200 Speaker 1: partook in it in the abuse that the world is like, Hey, 63 00:03:46,440 --> 00:03:50,560 Speaker 1: let's bring this guy in, you know, let's invite this guy. 64 00:03:50,680 --> 00:03:51,040 Speaker 3: Yeah. 65 00:03:51,080 --> 00:03:55,200 Speaker 1: So, I honestly don't know where to start, besides the 66 00:03:55,240 --> 00:04:02,760 Speaker 1: fact that your life is completely different now coming out 67 00:04:02,800 --> 00:04:08,280 Speaker 1: of addiction. Probably you could say multiple types of addiction, 68 00:04:10,360 --> 00:04:19,880 Speaker 1: and there is multiple casualties in the fallout of that. 69 00:04:20,800 --> 00:04:25,400 Speaker 1: In the form of different children, different mamas, like so 70 00:04:25,480 --> 00:04:29,400 Speaker 1: many of these questions, like you know. But the reason it's, 71 00:04:29,520 --> 00:04:31,880 Speaker 1: like I said, it's so fascinating is because here you 72 00:04:31,920 --> 00:04:36,880 Speaker 1: are sitting in a really good place. And that's what 73 00:04:37,000 --> 00:04:39,000 Speaker 1: makes it different is I could I could read all 74 00:04:39,000 --> 00:04:41,240 Speaker 1: these questions all day long, and then I got sitting 75 00:04:41,240 --> 00:04:43,440 Speaker 1: at the end of this table right now a dude 76 00:04:43,440 --> 00:04:46,880 Speaker 1: that's lived it and now could speak back to it 77 00:04:46,960 --> 00:04:50,120 Speaker 1: and go, I know, man, I was there, I was there. 78 00:04:50,640 --> 00:04:53,480 Speaker 1: Here's where I am. Now where do I start amber 79 00:04:53,640 --> 00:04:55,600 Speaker 1: with this? Well? I was just going to say, you 80 00:04:55,600 --> 00:04:57,880 Speaker 1: could do a mean so vagrant now. 81 00:04:57,800 --> 00:05:01,760 Speaker 4: Quick give call in a quick minute or so, just 82 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:03,680 Speaker 4: to do like where were you five years ago? 83 00:05:03,800 --> 00:05:04,560 Speaker 2: And then where are you now? 84 00:05:04,640 --> 00:05:05,280 Speaker 3: I can't do that. 85 00:05:05,440 --> 00:05:08,720 Speaker 1: No, that's the worst question ever for country music stars. 86 00:05:09,839 --> 00:05:12,320 Speaker 1: So for those of you that don't know Granger, tell 87 00:05:12,400 --> 00:05:14,039 Speaker 1: us a little b about yourself. I can't do that. 88 00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:16,039 Speaker 4: Hey, yeah, So I was trying to have him do 89 00:05:16,200 --> 00:05:20,039 Speaker 4: like a quick gist of why where was he and 90 00:05:20,040 --> 00:05:21,480 Speaker 4: where is he now? But I don't know that might 91 00:05:21,480 --> 00:05:23,360 Speaker 4: even be hard for him to sum up in five years. 92 00:05:23,480 --> 00:05:28,679 Speaker 3: Well, I could probably just kind of give the short 93 00:05:28,720 --> 00:05:31,560 Speaker 3: answer here is There's only one way out of where 94 00:05:31,600 --> 00:05:33,920 Speaker 3: I was, and that's you know, through God. That's it. 95 00:05:33,960 --> 00:05:35,840 Speaker 3: That's the only way that I was to get out 96 00:05:35,839 --> 00:05:41,520 Speaker 3: of there alive. And I just had to basically get 97 00:05:41,520 --> 00:05:45,880 Speaker 3: on my knees and just give up totally and figure 98 00:05:45,880 --> 00:05:49,400 Speaker 3: out that the absolute only way for me to come 99 00:05:49,440 --> 00:05:52,680 Speaker 3: out of this hell is through Jesus Christ. And once 100 00:05:52,720 --> 00:05:57,640 Speaker 3: I finally just gave up, surrendered, fully surrendered, because I've 101 00:05:57,640 --> 00:05:59,640 Speaker 3: tried to do it my way, and I've tried to say, yeah, 102 00:05:59,839 --> 00:06:02,719 Speaker 3: I'll I'll surrender butt or I'll do these things. But 103 00:06:03,760 --> 00:06:06,719 Speaker 3: once I fully just let go. And I know it's cliche, 104 00:06:06,760 --> 00:06:11,120 Speaker 3: but let go and let God. It was it was everything. 105 00:06:12,520 --> 00:06:16,719 Speaker 3: I felt a change immediately internally. It wasn't necessarily a 106 00:06:16,720 --> 00:06:18,840 Speaker 3: burning bush, but that was my burning bush. It was. 107 00:06:19,200 --> 00:06:23,560 Speaker 3: It was just a just a it's unexplainable just how 108 00:06:23,800 --> 00:06:26,320 Speaker 3: how different my mindset was, how different. I picked up 109 00:06:26,360 --> 00:06:29,800 Speaker 3: the phone for the first time and asked for help. 110 00:06:29,800 --> 00:06:31,359 Speaker 3: It was the only time I've ever picked up a 111 00:06:31,360 --> 00:06:33,800 Speaker 3: phone and said I need you now, I need you, 112 00:06:33,960 --> 00:06:34,520 Speaker 3: I need it. 113 00:06:34,600 --> 00:06:35,120 Speaker 1: Where were you? 114 00:06:35,520 --> 00:06:38,280 Speaker 3: I was in a hotel off of Alta, Mesa, and 115 00:06:38,320 --> 00:06:45,000 Speaker 3: I thirty five on January first of twenty and twenty two, Yeah, 116 00:06:45,160 --> 00:06:51,159 Speaker 3: twenty and twenty two, and I had been gone for 117 00:06:51,520 --> 00:06:55,760 Speaker 3: I think, I think at this point eight days from 118 00:06:55,760 --> 00:06:57,640 Speaker 3: my wife and my home and my job. I was 119 00:06:57,640 --> 00:07:00,800 Speaker 3: in the work truck, wasn't answer my phone, wasn't getting 120 00:07:00,800 --> 00:07:05,680 Speaker 3: a hold of anybody, in a hotel, a place I 121 00:07:05,680 --> 00:07:08,159 Speaker 3: shouldn't have been, with people I shouldn't have been with, 122 00:07:08,160 --> 00:07:11,080 Speaker 3: with things I shouldn't have had. And I remember it 123 00:07:11,120 --> 00:07:13,840 Speaker 3: was like two degrees and I had locked my keys 124 00:07:13,840 --> 00:07:18,040 Speaker 3: in my truck. And that had to happen, because if 125 00:07:18,040 --> 00:07:20,000 Speaker 3: I'd hadn't to locked my keys in my truck, I 126 00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:22,240 Speaker 3: wouldn't be sitting in this chair right here today. I 127 00:07:22,280 --> 00:07:25,160 Speaker 3: locked my keys in my truck and I gave up. 128 00:07:25,280 --> 00:07:27,920 Speaker 3: I got back in the hotel. It was so cold. 129 00:07:28,080 --> 00:07:29,720 Speaker 3: I'll never forget the day. I got on my knees 130 00:07:29,720 --> 00:07:33,120 Speaker 3: and I begged God. I said, get me out of this, 131 00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:35,679 Speaker 3: get me out of this. And I called my wife. 132 00:07:35,680 --> 00:07:37,960 Speaker 3: I called Shane, and I said, hey, come get me. 133 00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:40,400 Speaker 3: I need it, I need help. And she came. I 134 00:07:40,400 --> 00:07:42,280 Speaker 3: mean she didn't hesitate. 135 00:07:42,760 --> 00:07:43,520 Speaker 1: Then what happened. 136 00:07:44,000 --> 00:07:50,240 Speaker 3: We went to a meeting, an AA meeting, And I'll 137 00:07:50,280 --> 00:07:53,360 Speaker 3: backtrack a little bit. I was fighting a charge that 138 00:07:53,640 --> 00:07:56,400 Speaker 3: was a couple of detectives I'd called my wife and 139 00:07:56,440 --> 00:07:58,640 Speaker 3: my mom and were asking to find me. And I 140 00:07:58,680 --> 00:08:00,400 Speaker 3: was fighting a charge that I was going to court 141 00:08:00,440 --> 00:08:02,760 Speaker 3: for in March of the same year of twenty twenty, 142 00:08:03,040 --> 00:08:04,760 Speaker 3: and I was facing a lot of time in prison, 143 00:08:05,200 --> 00:08:09,000 Speaker 3: and I was scared. I mean to short, long story short, 144 00:08:09,040 --> 00:08:10,320 Speaker 3: I was scared. I didn't want to go to prison. 145 00:08:10,360 --> 00:08:12,400 Speaker 3: I'd been to prison before. They were trying to give 146 00:08:12,440 --> 00:08:13,560 Speaker 3: me a lot of time, so I know that I 147 00:08:13,680 --> 00:08:16,120 Speaker 3: wasn't just going to a state jail. I was actually 148 00:08:16,120 --> 00:08:19,720 Speaker 3: going to a big boy prison, and so I was scared. 149 00:08:19,760 --> 00:08:24,440 Speaker 3: But we went to a meeting and we started getting 150 00:08:24,440 --> 00:08:26,640 Speaker 3: things together for the court date, which was in March. 151 00:08:27,160 --> 00:08:30,040 Speaker 3: So March thirteenth, I got sentenced to five years and 152 00:08:31,440 --> 00:08:34,640 Speaker 3: I'll never forget man Shanea's face that day. She was 153 00:08:34,640 --> 00:08:39,280 Speaker 3: crushed because we honestly thought that there was a chance 154 00:08:39,280 --> 00:08:39,840 Speaker 3: for probation. 155 00:08:41,280 --> 00:08:43,720 Speaker 1: But the Joe or the charges for everybody to know. 156 00:08:44,120 --> 00:08:46,880 Speaker 3: So forger Eva financial instrument was one of the charges. 157 00:08:46,920 --> 00:08:50,520 Speaker 3: Credit check hot checks basically yes, And this was not 158 00:08:50,640 --> 00:08:53,960 Speaker 3: my first time with these checks. I had been caught 159 00:08:54,040 --> 00:08:57,319 Speaker 3: in twenty eighteen for the same charge with a credit 160 00:08:57,360 --> 00:09:00,840 Speaker 3: card abuse charge of using well I had a credit 161 00:09:00,840 --> 00:09:02,640 Speaker 3: card in my wallet, it wasn't mine. So when I 162 00:09:02,679 --> 00:09:05,560 Speaker 3: got arrested for the check that was that I tried 163 00:09:05,559 --> 00:09:08,640 Speaker 3: to cash, they found the credit card I got. That 164 00:09:08,720 --> 00:09:11,520 Speaker 3: was the first time I went to prison. Between those times, 165 00:09:11,559 --> 00:09:15,280 Speaker 3: I had a possession under a Graham charge of controlled 166 00:09:15,280 --> 00:09:19,800 Speaker 3: substance I was. I was addicted to meth methamphetamines and 167 00:09:19,840 --> 00:09:22,839 Speaker 3: have been or had been for years prior to that. 168 00:09:23,720 --> 00:09:27,719 Speaker 3: In and out of rehabs. Seven impatient rehabs. I think 169 00:09:27,720 --> 00:09:33,319 Speaker 3: it is total. I think I've completed five of them. 170 00:09:33,679 --> 00:09:38,560 Speaker 3: In and out of jail. For petty crimes, theft, burglar 171 00:09:38,679 --> 00:09:42,880 Speaker 3: of a habitat. I got arrested in Minnesota for burglar 172 00:09:43,000 --> 00:09:44,959 Speaker 3: of a habitat. I went up there. I was out 173 00:09:44,960 --> 00:09:46,720 Speaker 3: of my mind. I don't even remember much of it, 174 00:09:46,760 --> 00:09:49,920 Speaker 3: but I had taken a passport. I stole a truck 175 00:09:50,000 --> 00:09:52,000 Speaker 3: up there. Thought I was going to go to Canada 176 00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:55,280 Speaker 3: during COVID. I mean, honestly, what are you really thinking, like, 177 00:09:55,320 --> 00:09:57,800 Speaker 3: trying to get across the border COVID with a fake 178 00:09:57,840 --> 00:10:00,520 Speaker 3: passport just out of my mind. 179 00:10:00,559 --> 00:10:03,120 Speaker 1: I don't think I knew that you did. 180 00:10:03,280 --> 00:10:05,280 Speaker 2: It's just it was a big mess. 181 00:10:05,360 --> 00:10:05,960 Speaker 1: Yeah. 182 00:10:06,200 --> 00:10:07,720 Speaker 4: What I was I was thinking about when you were 183 00:10:07,720 --> 00:10:10,680 Speaker 4: saying that was for so many years, we tried to 184 00:10:10,679 --> 00:10:12,560 Speaker 4: save you, We tried to get you into red, we 185 00:10:12,640 --> 00:10:14,559 Speaker 4: tried to do all this stuff, and finally you had 186 00:10:14,600 --> 00:10:16,839 Speaker 4: to realize you had to be the one to call, 187 00:10:16,960 --> 00:10:18,680 Speaker 4: make the call and say I need help. 188 00:10:18,760 --> 00:10:20,480 Speaker 3: Yeah, because the times that I did go to rehab, 189 00:10:20,559 --> 00:10:24,679 Speaker 3: I will I went to appease the masses basically, and 190 00:10:24,720 --> 00:10:25,480 Speaker 3: you're so likable. 191 00:10:25,600 --> 00:10:27,120 Speaker 2: Everybody loves you and they're like always great. 192 00:10:27,120 --> 00:10:29,800 Speaker 3: It was a manipulation thing, and I was very good 193 00:10:29,880 --> 00:10:33,040 Speaker 3: at manipulation. That's probably why I work in sales today, 194 00:10:33,120 --> 00:10:35,319 Speaker 3: not saying that I'm a manipulator anymore, because there's a 195 00:10:35,360 --> 00:10:38,800 Speaker 3: fine line between good salesman. Yeah, and see that's one 196 00:10:38,800 --> 00:10:41,319 Speaker 3: of my character defects. I have to know the line 197 00:10:41,520 --> 00:10:45,880 Speaker 3: of people pleasing and people pleasing, Like there's a manipulation 198 00:10:45,960 --> 00:10:48,480 Speaker 3: aspect that can go either way with that. And but 199 00:10:48,520 --> 00:10:52,800 Speaker 3: I've I learned so much in the n A program, 200 00:10:53,040 --> 00:10:56,439 Speaker 3: and it's it is for a lot of a lot 201 00:10:56,480 --> 00:11:00,240 Speaker 3: of addicts, celebrate recoveries for a lot of addicts. There's 202 00:11:00,280 --> 00:11:02,840 Speaker 3: different programs out there for a lot of addicts. But 203 00:11:02,880 --> 00:11:05,800 Speaker 3: the thing that the only thing that worked for me, 204 00:11:06,080 --> 00:11:08,600 Speaker 3: because those those programs worked for a time, but the 205 00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,840 Speaker 3: only thing that worked for me was getting out of 206 00:11:11,880 --> 00:11:14,439 Speaker 3: the way of God. Was getting out of the way 207 00:11:14,520 --> 00:11:18,680 Speaker 3: his will and realizing that a square peg doesn't fit 208 00:11:18,679 --> 00:11:20,480 Speaker 3: in a circle hole. So I got to quit trying 209 00:11:20,520 --> 00:11:22,760 Speaker 3: to do it my way. It doesn't work. It never 210 00:11:22,840 --> 00:11:24,840 Speaker 3: did work. How did you know that there was a way. 211 00:11:26,960 --> 00:11:28,839 Speaker 3: I didn't at the time. I just knew that there 212 00:11:28,920 --> 00:11:32,800 Speaker 3: wasn't any other way. And I had never tried and 213 00:11:32,840 --> 00:11:37,480 Speaker 3: I had never tried that way. So it was it 214 00:11:37,520 --> 00:11:41,960 Speaker 3: was a I've tried everything else, you know, why not 215 00:11:42,120 --> 00:11:45,000 Speaker 3: type of thing. That was the mindset. But it was 216 00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:50,280 Speaker 3: the the begging of just get this, just relieve me 217 00:11:50,520 --> 00:11:54,360 Speaker 3: of this, and and and there's so much that's wrapped 218 00:11:54,360 --> 00:11:57,200 Speaker 3: into that of those questions that I begged God for. 219 00:11:57,640 --> 00:12:00,280 Speaker 3: It was so much of relieve my cis you're in 220 00:12:00,280 --> 00:12:02,280 Speaker 3: my family of the mess that I'm putting them in. 221 00:12:02,360 --> 00:12:04,320 Speaker 3: Relieve my wife of the mess I'm putting her, And 222 00:12:04,400 --> 00:12:08,840 Speaker 3: relieve my kids of the abandonment that I that I created. 223 00:12:08,880 --> 00:12:12,080 Speaker 3: My children's mother didn't take my kids from me. I 224 00:12:12,080 --> 00:12:15,000 Speaker 3: I I don't want to say gave them away, But 225 00:12:15,080 --> 00:12:16,800 Speaker 3: I didn't do what I was supposed to do as 226 00:12:16,800 --> 00:12:19,120 Speaker 3: a father at the time that I was supposed to 227 00:12:19,200 --> 00:12:23,160 Speaker 3: do it. And I realize that now, and back then 228 00:12:23,200 --> 00:12:28,040 Speaker 3: I had sour taste in my mouth towards my children's 229 00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:32,480 Speaker 3: mother and their stepfather because I was still a mess 230 00:12:32,520 --> 00:12:34,240 Speaker 3: in my own head and a mess in my own way. 231 00:12:34,679 --> 00:12:38,120 Speaker 3: And now I can't thank them enough for how they've 232 00:12:38,200 --> 00:12:41,440 Speaker 3: raised those boys. And you know, I do get to 233 00:12:42,280 --> 00:12:44,720 Speaker 3: have my two younger boys in my life right now. 234 00:12:45,120 --> 00:12:47,920 Speaker 3: And God's working in my other two boys' lives. He is, 235 00:12:48,320 --> 00:12:50,240 Speaker 3: He's working in their lives, He's working in our lives, 236 00:12:50,280 --> 00:12:53,120 Speaker 3: and there's going to be some reuniting. It's I've got 237 00:12:53,160 --> 00:12:56,520 Speaker 3: no doubt in my mind, and it's it's it's such 238 00:12:56,559 --> 00:13:01,600 Speaker 3: a it's such a blessing to realize that God is 239 00:13:01,679 --> 00:13:07,559 Speaker 3: working and to see it behind the scenes without seeing it. 240 00:13:07,640 --> 00:13:12,720 Speaker 3: If that makes sense, is it makes me speaks man. 241 00:13:12,840 --> 00:13:17,880 Speaker 1: I preached on psalmone thirty last Sunday, and I was 242 00:13:17,920 --> 00:13:21,560 Speaker 1: studying a little bit of Jonah in that message, because 243 00:13:21,640 --> 00:13:25,160 Speaker 1: the Psalmist is crying from out of the depths, and 244 00:13:26,080 --> 00:13:29,000 Speaker 1: we've all had these Jonah. Moments in our lives, all 245 00:13:29,040 --> 00:13:33,760 Speaker 1: of us have something and for you, you know, Jonah, 246 00:13:33,840 --> 00:13:36,120 Speaker 1: he runs from God. God has a will for his life. 247 00:13:36,200 --> 00:13:38,600 Speaker 1: He has a purpose for Jonah, and that's to go 248 00:13:38,600 --> 00:13:42,040 Speaker 1: to Nineveh and preach. And he runs from that because 249 00:13:42,080 --> 00:13:46,800 Speaker 1: it's ninev is scary. And he gets on a boat 250 00:13:46,880 --> 00:13:52,280 Speaker 1: and flees, and God causes this huge storm to hit 251 00:13:52,280 --> 00:13:54,880 Speaker 1: the boat, and everyone on the boat is freaking out. 252 00:13:55,720 --> 00:13:57,640 Speaker 1: They're like, this is awful. This is like the worst 253 00:13:57,640 --> 00:14:03,280 Speaker 1: storm I've ever seen. And Jonah's like, guys, it's it's me, 254 00:14:04,160 --> 00:14:07,600 Speaker 1: Like I'm the reason for the storm. God's chasing me down. 255 00:14:07,640 --> 00:14:13,000 Speaker 1: He's mad at me, and and yeah, yeah, it's like 256 00:14:13,080 --> 00:14:16,480 Speaker 1: kind of what your story sounds like. Yeah, And so basically, 257 00:14:16,600 --> 00:14:20,240 Speaker 1: Jonah's like, just throw me off the boat. I mean, 258 00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:22,520 Speaker 1: we're all either we're all gonna die, this whole boat's 259 00:14:22,520 --> 00:14:24,840 Speaker 1: going to go down, or you guys, just throw me off. 260 00:14:26,160 --> 00:14:28,720 Speaker 1: And so they throw him off, and that's when the 261 00:14:28,800 --> 00:14:31,720 Speaker 1: fish takes them, you know, God takes them through the fish. 262 00:14:32,280 --> 00:14:35,920 Speaker 1: And then as I'm studying Forsalone thirty, it's interesting I 263 00:14:35,960 --> 00:14:40,200 Speaker 1: noticed that Jonah doesn't in the text. Jonah doesn't speak 264 00:14:40,240 --> 00:14:44,440 Speaker 1: to God at all until he's in the belly, and 265 00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:47,560 Speaker 1: it's then it's from out of the depths. From then 266 00:14:48,000 --> 00:14:51,160 Speaker 1: I'm in the deep. God, Please, where are you saved me? 267 00:14:52,080 --> 00:14:54,360 Speaker 1: And it's funny that he says that because God's he knows, 268 00:14:54,400 --> 00:14:57,120 Speaker 1: God's been with him the whole time, just wreaking havoc 269 00:14:57,200 --> 00:15:01,240 Speaker 1: on his life until he finally and everyone else on 270 00:15:01,280 --> 00:15:03,160 Speaker 1: the boat takes all the punishment for it. 271 00:15:03,320 --> 00:15:05,880 Speaker 3: See, And I think I can relate to that because 272 00:15:07,640 --> 00:15:11,840 Speaker 3: the twister that I created around my life, that had 273 00:15:11,840 --> 00:15:14,400 Speaker 3: a thirty mile radius to everywhere I went, was just 274 00:15:14,440 --> 00:15:18,880 Speaker 3: God trying to say, man, stop, yeah, sit down, and 275 00:15:18,960 --> 00:15:21,080 Speaker 3: it was hurting everybody around me because I wasn't seeing it. 276 00:15:21,120 --> 00:15:23,800 Speaker 3: I wouldn't being like Jonah just saying, hey, throw me 277 00:15:23,840 --> 00:15:24,800 Speaker 3: off the boat. 278 00:15:25,000 --> 00:15:27,640 Speaker 1: You know, well, we don't know how long he I mean, 279 00:15:27,640 --> 00:15:29,360 Speaker 1: this might have been days. We don't really know through 280 00:15:29,360 --> 00:15:33,960 Speaker 1: the text how long he fought it, right until finally 281 00:15:34,040 --> 00:15:36,840 Speaker 1: they were they were like, what's going on? It's me, guy, 282 00:15:37,200 --> 00:15:40,480 Speaker 1: it's me. We don't know how long. So you could 283 00:15:40,520 --> 00:15:43,200 Speaker 1: easily have been just like Jonah. The problem is we 284 00:15:43,240 --> 00:15:45,120 Speaker 1: need to also read the backap of Jonah because then 285 00:15:45,280 --> 00:15:47,200 Speaker 1: he gets in his will like you are now and 286 00:15:48,000 --> 00:15:51,280 Speaker 1: hopefully I am. And then he gets to Nineveh, you know, 287 00:15:51,360 --> 00:15:54,880 Speaker 1: these heathens, and he preaches. He doesn't want to go 288 00:15:54,880 --> 00:15:56,720 Speaker 1: in there. He's so scared of the city, so scared 289 00:15:56,760 --> 00:16:00,240 Speaker 1: of all these heathens. And he goes in there is 290 00:16:00,280 --> 00:16:04,600 Speaker 1: like repent, you know, turn back to God, and all 291 00:16:04,600 --> 00:16:08,000 Speaker 1: these heathens look at him and they're like, hey, you're right, 292 00:16:08,040 --> 00:16:12,360 Speaker 1: we should And then he gets mad. He's like, God 293 00:16:12,400 --> 00:16:15,640 Speaker 1: should punish these people, these heathens, And God goes, I 294 00:16:15,680 --> 00:16:17,440 Speaker 1: told you to preach to him, and they turned to me. 295 00:16:18,320 --> 00:16:20,280 Speaker 1: Who are you now? Who are you to say I 296 00:16:20,280 --> 00:16:23,560 Speaker 1: should do what I need to do? Then Jonah's like 297 00:16:23,880 --> 00:16:29,880 Speaker 1: being Jonah again. Anyway, you have a wild story and 298 00:16:31,240 --> 00:16:35,240 Speaker 1: it's it's so interesting to hear that. And you and 299 00:16:35,280 --> 00:16:38,160 Speaker 1: I have talked about your prison experience. We sat around 300 00:16:38,160 --> 00:16:40,520 Speaker 1: the campfire last night, which is what this I always say, 301 00:16:40,520 --> 00:16:45,280 Speaker 1: this podcast is about sitting around campfire talking. But you 302 00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:48,080 Speaker 1: you've told me many, so many stories about your prison experience. 303 00:16:48,120 --> 00:16:50,600 Speaker 1: And if you could paint that picture. Don't do it. 304 00:16:50,680 --> 00:16:53,040 Speaker 1: You don't need to. We don't have enough time. But 305 00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:57,280 Speaker 1: if you paint that picture perfectly for anyone listening, it 306 00:16:57,400 --> 00:17:00,520 Speaker 1: should be enough for anyone to go Nope, don't do that. 307 00:17:00,840 --> 00:17:02,480 Speaker 3: Well, the first five minutes of it should be you. 308 00:17:02,440 --> 00:17:08,399 Speaker 1: Know, god, really it was h Yeah, can you find 309 00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:10,600 Speaker 1: a point in your life? I know you've thought about 310 00:17:10,600 --> 00:17:14,760 Speaker 1: this endlessly? Have you? Have you seen the point where 311 00:17:14,800 --> 00:17:18,560 Speaker 1: you started to go off the rails? You said you 312 00:17:18,640 --> 00:17:21,119 Speaker 1: fought it for a long time. Where did the fighting start? 313 00:17:22,200 --> 00:17:25,320 Speaker 3: I think the actual off the rails aspect of it 314 00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:28,399 Speaker 3: was probably avery point. 315 00:17:28,880 --> 00:17:31,800 Speaker 2: I think that was we were living together too too. 316 00:17:31,960 --> 00:17:34,320 Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that was the off the rails. I 317 00:17:34,440 --> 00:17:36,320 Speaker 3: was selling drugs at the time. 318 00:17:38,520 --> 00:17:39,080 Speaker 1: I was. 319 00:17:40,640 --> 00:17:44,200 Speaker 3: Incapacitated, to say the least, every single day that we 320 00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:48,679 Speaker 3: that we lived there. And I think the seventeen and 321 00:17:48,840 --> 00:17:51,919 Speaker 3: fifteen I began using I think thirteen or fourteen, I 322 00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:55,560 Speaker 3: started drinking at a buddy's house. And I don't want 323 00:17:55,560 --> 00:17:58,440 Speaker 3: to say any names, you know what I mean. And 324 00:17:58,600 --> 00:18:04,400 Speaker 3: but really off the rail, Yeah, seventeen to twenty four 325 00:18:04,640 --> 00:18:06,080 Speaker 3: was a blur. 326 00:18:07,240 --> 00:18:09,479 Speaker 2: Is that just the crowd that you got involved with? 327 00:18:09,680 --> 00:18:13,359 Speaker 3: It was that it was the lifestyle. It was the 328 00:18:15,000 --> 00:18:16,800 Speaker 3: amount of money I was making. I mean, it was 329 00:18:16,800 --> 00:18:20,159 Speaker 3: all the things. It was everything kind of the perfect storm. 330 00:18:20,880 --> 00:18:26,119 Speaker 3: The people pleasing aspect I loved to be the party 331 00:18:26,480 --> 00:18:29,560 Speaker 3: and even growing up when Mom and Dan went out 332 00:18:29,560 --> 00:18:31,919 Speaker 3: of town, our house was a party house. That's where 333 00:18:32,640 --> 00:18:36,200 Speaker 3: I threw parties, and it was you know, I ruined 334 00:18:36,240 --> 00:18:38,320 Speaker 3: a lot of their I feel terrible, don't sorry, Mom, 335 00:18:38,600 --> 00:18:40,359 Speaker 3: I feel terrible, But I ruined a lot of their 336 00:18:40,440 --> 00:18:43,040 Speaker 3: vacations because there'd be a police officer calling them, mister 337 00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:46,159 Speaker 3: and missus Campbell, your son is having a party and 338 00:18:46,200 --> 00:18:49,720 Speaker 3: we found a block of marijuana in your backyard. And 339 00:18:50,280 --> 00:18:51,800 Speaker 3: you know, they were in the Bahamas one time, had 340 00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:54,040 Speaker 3: to come home. But yeah, I think off the rails, 341 00:18:54,160 --> 00:18:59,560 Speaker 3: off the rails, and when I knew I had something 342 00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:01,719 Speaker 3: needed to change, but I just I couldn't get out 343 00:19:01,720 --> 00:19:06,880 Speaker 3: of my own way was probably yeah, probably every point time. 344 00:19:07,840 --> 00:19:12,000 Speaker 2: And then it was about ten fifteen years in and out. 345 00:19:12,320 --> 00:19:17,399 Speaker 3: Oh yeah, rehabs, in jails, just just not you know, 346 00:19:17,560 --> 00:19:19,120 Speaker 3: telling everybody, well, I can do this on my own. 347 00:19:19,280 --> 00:19:21,240 Speaker 3: You know, I don't. I don't. I'm good, I don't 348 00:19:21,240 --> 00:19:24,600 Speaker 3: need anybody, blah blah blah. Yeah, just fooling myself, really 349 00:19:25,160 --> 00:19:30,159 Speaker 3: trying to paint this picture or have this facade of 350 00:19:30,200 --> 00:19:33,399 Speaker 3: everything's great, everything's fine, and I'm I was good at it. 351 00:19:33,480 --> 00:19:36,160 Speaker 3: I was good at playing that game and making everybody 352 00:19:36,160 --> 00:19:38,960 Speaker 3: think that things were okay. Maybe I wasn't that good 353 00:19:39,000 --> 00:19:42,399 Speaker 3: at it because you guys always knew, you know, you 354 00:19:42,480 --> 00:19:44,879 Speaker 3: got I think sometimes y'all might not have known, Like 355 00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:46,960 Speaker 3: whenever I had gone to rehab and came out, and 356 00:19:47,280 --> 00:19:49,040 Speaker 3: you know, I'd stay clean for a little bit, but 357 00:19:49,080 --> 00:19:51,200 Speaker 3: I'd just tell y'all was staying clean for a lot longer. 358 00:19:51,200 --> 00:19:52,600 Speaker 3: But I had already started using. 359 00:19:52,720 --> 00:19:54,359 Speaker 1: You know, I think we kind of knew. Yeah, I 360 00:19:54,400 --> 00:19:57,399 Speaker 1: think so it would be hard to not know. You 361 00:19:57,440 --> 00:20:00,199 Speaker 1: would be the same way if it was us. So 362 00:20:00,600 --> 00:20:03,159 Speaker 1: in twenty twenty two, you had the moment locked the 363 00:20:03,240 --> 00:20:08,639 Speaker 1: keys in the truck and then SHANEA picks you up. Yeah, 364 00:20:08,840 --> 00:20:11,159 Speaker 1: well we know if you fast forward you end up 365 00:20:11,160 --> 00:20:13,720 Speaker 1: going to prison, correct for the charges. Correct, But you 366 00:20:13,760 --> 00:20:15,560 Speaker 1: were already kind of rebuilding. 367 00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:17,680 Speaker 2: Yeah, I had lunch with you right before you went. 368 00:20:17,920 --> 00:20:22,119 Speaker 3: I had lunch, Yes, So so I had. I had 369 00:20:22,320 --> 00:20:26,680 Speaker 3: stayed clean in twenty twenty one, and prior to that 370 00:20:26,880 --> 00:20:29,040 Speaker 3: for thirteen months, and I relapsed. I drank a beer 371 00:20:29,040 --> 00:20:32,159 Speaker 3: and I relapsed, and my Sobriet beer one beer, but 372 00:20:32,160 --> 00:20:34,719 Speaker 3: that at that time that one beer canceled that date. 373 00:20:34,760 --> 00:20:36,960 Speaker 3: That date was no longer good, that date was gone. 374 00:20:37,160 --> 00:20:39,800 Speaker 3: And a couple weeks later I thought about that beer 375 00:20:39,800 --> 00:20:40,719 Speaker 3: that I had and I was like, well, I can 376 00:20:40,760 --> 00:20:41,520 Speaker 3: have a couple of beers. 377 00:20:41,760 --> 00:20:42,280 Speaker 1: Oh yeah. 378 00:20:42,280 --> 00:20:43,920 Speaker 3: And then a couple of weeks later, well I can 379 00:20:44,080 --> 00:20:47,399 Speaker 3: have a bucket. And that night we were playing we 380 00:20:47,400 --> 00:20:50,080 Speaker 3: were playing darts. I won't forget that night either, where 381 00:20:50,240 --> 00:20:52,560 Speaker 3: Shane and I went out. We were playing darts and 382 00:20:53,119 --> 00:20:55,120 Speaker 3: had a bunch of beers and had a rumplement shot. 383 00:20:55,720 --> 00:20:59,520 Speaker 3: And that she knows that that I tell her that 384 00:20:59,560 --> 00:21:01,040 Speaker 3: I don't think that that's what put me over there 385 00:21:01,080 --> 00:21:03,400 Speaker 3: is that's what put me over the edge. I created 386 00:21:03,400 --> 00:21:06,760 Speaker 3: an argument, I created a fight and left her at 387 00:21:06,800 --> 00:21:09,919 Speaker 3: home and went to the dope house. And that was 388 00:21:11,560 --> 00:21:14,199 Speaker 3: I think that was in December when I was gone, 389 00:21:15,800 --> 00:21:19,440 Speaker 3: But I came back. I started rebuilding from from January 390 00:21:19,520 --> 00:21:22,080 Speaker 3: to March, know whing this case was coming up, and 391 00:21:22,400 --> 00:21:24,760 Speaker 3: in the back of my head, I was telling myself, 392 00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,879 Speaker 3: I'm getting time. I'm getting time. There's nothing there this 393 00:21:27,880 --> 00:21:31,080 Speaker 3: this lady, miss Beach. She already told me if she 394 00:21:31,119 --> 00:21:32,960 Speaker 3: ever sees me in her courtroom again, she's gonna throw 395 00:21:32,960 --> 00:21:34,840 Speaker 3: the book at me. So I already. I already knew 396 00:21:36,040 --> 00:21:39,359 Speaker 3: that there was I was getting time. The attorneys that 397 00:21:39,400 --> 00:21:42,880 Speaker 3: we were working with were kind of finicky, but I knew. 398 00:21:43,080 --> 00:21:44,399 Speaker 3: I was just hoping that I didn't get time, but 399 00:21:44,440 --> 00:21:46,040 Speaker 3: I knew I was getting time. But while I was 400 00:21:46,040 --> 00:21:51,560 Speaker 3: in there, my wife Shana found her faith and found 401 00:21:51,560 --> 00:21:55,960 Speaker 3: God and found and grew in her walk. And for me, 402 00:21:56,200 --> 00:21:58,639 Speaker 3: that means everything. And for me, I do it. Like 403 00:21:58,680 --> 00:22:00,280 Speaker 3: I told you guys last night at the camp, if 404 00:22:00,320 --> 00:22:01,800 Speaker 3: I had to go to prison a million times over 405 00:22:01,840 --> 00:22:04,200 Speaker 3: for her to find her walk, I'll do it hands down. 406 00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:07,160 Speaker 3: Wouldn't even hesitate, tell me, sign me up right now. 407 00:22:07,520 --> 00:22:10,400 Speaker 3: And while I was in there, they had an app 408 00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:12,280 Speaker 3: called Pandos, so I was watching. I was getting to 409 00:22:12,320 --> 00:22:15,080 Speaker 3: watch sermons because they gave us tablets in there, but 410 00:22:15,160 --> 00:22:17,399 Speaker 3: I got I got to watch. This was after bido, 411 00:22:17,680 --> 00:22:19,080 Speaker 3: and we'll go into bito another time. 412 00:22:19,080 --> 00:22:23,040 Speaker 1: But let me pause you to to say that for 413 00:22:23,080 --> 00:22:26,360 Speaker 1: people listening for context, things are really bad for you 414 00:22:27,200 --> 00:22:30,119 Speaker 1: because because of debt that had piled up, because of 415 00:22:30,200 --> 00:22:38,679 Speaker 1: child support, because of felony charges. If anyone's listening that 416 00:22:38,760 --> 00:22:42,520 Speaker 1: has a similar situation or family member, and almost everyone does, 417 00:22:42,600 --> 00:22:47,520 Speaker 1: absolutely you could you could reach a point where I 418 00:22:47,560 --> 00:22:50,600 Speaker 1: mean even I was like, I don't I don't know 419 00:22:50,600 --> 00:22:54,320 Speaker 1: what to say because because say say you're say the 420 00:22:54,359 --> 00:22:57,800 Speaker 1: Lord saves you, and the Lord regenerate your life, and 421 00:22:59,280 --> 00:23:02,760 Speaker 1: you're still de de with consequences of extreme debt, extreme 422 00:23:03,160 --> 00:23:08,320 Speaker 1: child support, felony charges, can't find a job. But but 423 00:23:10,600 --> 00:23:13,600 Speaker 1: that wasn't God's plan either, because the God even started 424 00:23:13,640 --> 00:23:16,920 Speaker 1: redeeming that. He doesn't have to, but he started redeeming that. 425 00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:18,919 Speaker 1: So anyway, I just want to say, I wanted to 426 00:23:18,960 --> 00:23:21,920 Speaker 1: pause that to say you're in a bad spot, not 427 00:23:22,000 --> 00:23:25,840 Speaker 1: just with addiction and relationships, but also like with the state, 428 00:23:26,000 --> 00:23:29,520 Speaker 1: with life everything. Yes, yeah, the state. And I'll say 429 00:23:29,520 --> 00:23:31,920 Speaker 1: too because I, your mom and I have talked endlessly 430 00:23:31,920 --> 00:23:36,280 Speaker 1: about this the state as far as correctional you know, 431 00:23:36,720 --> 00:23:40,600 Speaker 1: the institution that we have set up nationwide, it's just 432 00:23:40,720 --> 00:23:44,080 Speaker 1: not set up for people to actually rehab and get 433 00:23:44,080 --> 00:23:46,800 Speaker 1: better and restart a life. No, it just kind of 434 00:23:46,840 --> 00:23:51,200 Speaker 1: holds you out of outside of society and just forces 435 00:23:51,240 --> 00:23:53,280 Speaker 1: you just you're on the out, you're on the outskirts, 436 00:23:53,320 --> 00:23:56,640 Speaker 1: and you'll never recover the way the state has it, 437 00:23:56,640 --> 00:24:00,320 Speaker 1: it's not made to rehabilitate people. It's made just to 438 00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:03,000 Speaker 1: get you off the streets in away from everybody, and 439 00:24:03,040 --> 00:24:06,760 Speaker 1: then all the taxpayers pay for the prison systems. It's crazy. 440 00:24:06,880 --> 00:24:09,360 Speaker 3: They keep the prison system full for a reason. Oh 441 00:24:09,440 --> 00:24:09,960 Speaker 3: my goodness. 442 00:24:10,480 --> 00:24:12,399 Speaker 5: A lot of people thinking about twenty twenty five and 443 00:24:12,480 --> 00:24:16,240 Speaker 5: New Year's resolutions, and a lot of those are business related. 444 00:24:16,640 --> 00:24:18,600 Speaker 5: In fact, a lot of people listening right now are thinking, 445 00:24:18,840 --> 00:24:21,000 Speaker 5: this is the year I'm finally going to start that 446 00:24:21,080 --> 00:24:24,040 Speaker 5: small business something I've been wanting to do it forever, 447 00:24:24,359 --> 00:24:26,840 Speaker 5: and now is the time. It's going to be some 448 00:24:26,960 --> 00:24:29,400 Speaker 5: kind of e commerce business. And I need a website, 449 00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:31,720 Speaker 5: and I've got the perfect product and I'm gonna put 450 00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:34,000 Speaker 5: it on there. 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What happens if you don't 470 00:25:30,720 --> 00:25:34,600 Speaker 5: act now, maybe you'll regret it. Don't kick yourself when 471 00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:36,840 Speaker 5: you hear me say this again in a year and 472 00:25:36,880 --> 00:25:40,960 Speaker 5: you still haven't done anything. Established in twenty twenty five 473 00:25:41,200 --> 00:25:43,600 Speaker 5: has a nice ring to it, doesn't it. Sign up 474 00:25:43,640 --> 00:25:46,600 Speaker 5: for your one dollar per month trial period at shopify 475 00:25:46,640 --> 00:25:50,280 Speaker 5: dot com slash granger all lowercase got to shopify dot 476 00:25:50,320 --> 00:25:54,560 Speaker 5: com slash granger to start selling with Shopify today Shopify 477 00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:57,720 Speaker 5: dot com slash granger. If you want to get a 478 00:25:57,760 --> 00:25:59,320 Speaker 5: hold of me, an easy way to do it is 479 00:25:59,359 --> 00:26:03,719 Speaker 5: cameo dot com slash granger Smith. Cameo dot com slash 480 00:26:03,720 --> 00:26:07,240 Speaker 5: granger Smith. You could order a video message from me 481 00:26:07,520 --> 00:26:11,320 Speaker 5: saying whatever customizable message you want me to say happy birthday, 482 00:26:11,359 --> 00:26:14,760 Speaker 5: happy anniversary, maybe a word of encouragement, whatever it might be. 483 00:26:14,800 --> 00:26:17,040 Speaker 5: I think it's a pretty good gift, especially for people 484 00:26:17,080 --> 00:26:19,119 Speaker 5: you just don't know how to buy for get them 485 00:26:19,119 --> 00:26:22,080 Speaker 5: a cameo from me at cameo dot com slash Granger Smith. 486 00:26:22,440 --> 00:26:29,160 Speaker 1: So you are you? You end up getting incarcerated? How 487 00:26:29,160 --> 00:26:29,640 Speaker 1: many years? 488 00:26:30,000 --> 00:26:30,760 Speaker 3: They give me? A five year? 489 00:26:30,800 --> 00:26:32,119 Speaker 1: So gave you five year cents? 490 00:26:33,119 --> 00:26:36,960 Speaker 3: And which for my charge in the in the county 491 00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:41,080 Speaker 3: I was in. Is is a pretty steep penalty. But 492 00:26:41,320 --> 00:26:46,520 Speaker 3: since my priors, since I had priors, that's why. That's 493 00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:47,240 Speaker 3: why I got sentence. 494 00:26:47,280 --> 00:26:55,359 Speaker 1: I got Where did you? At what point does the 495 00:26:56,200 --> 00:26:58,919 Speaker 1: you know? Shaney said, Shana is all of a sudden, 496 00:26:59,440 --> 00:27:03,600 Speaker 1: she's walking in her faith. When did the Lord find you? 497 00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:07,119 Speaker 1: Was it slow or was it one moment? Or was 498 00:27:07,160 --> 00:27:09,239 Speaker 1: it a guy that talked to you? Or was it 499 00:27:09,359 --> 00:27:11,879 Speaker 1: just the seed had been planted and slowly grew. 500 00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:13,960 Speaker 3: Seed was planted in twenty fifteen when I was in 501 00:27:14,040 --> 00:27:16,919 Speaker 3: Arran County with a gentleman named Byron Starks, and that 502 00:27:17,040 --> 00:27:19,520 Speaker 3: seed was planned. He introduced me to the Bible. I've 503 00:27:19,560 --> 00:27:21,399 Speaker 3: known about the Bible. I'd been to church as a kid. 504 00:27:21,720 --> 00:27:24,119 Speaker 3: I grew up Episcopellian, which was a boring church that 505 00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:26,480 Speaker 3: the Organs and everything. I'm just saying, I apologize to 506 00:27:26,480 --> 00:27:29,399 Speaker 3: the Piscopellions, but when I was a kid, I was 507 00:27:29,480 --> 00:27:33,440 Speaker 3: kicking pews, just just a fly. But so he planted 508 00:27:33,480 --> 00:27:36,840 Speaker 3: the seed in twenty fifteen and Terran County Jail, and 509 00:27:37,720 --> 00:27:42,879 Speaker 3: it just I won't forget that because the seed was planted. 510 00:27:42,960 --> 00:27:48,399 Speaker 3: So I always had questions. So I considered myself agnostic 511 00:27:49,480 --> 00:27:51,280 Speaker 3: just because I always had questions. I never thought I 512 00:27:51,280 --> 00:27:53,119 Speaker 3: was an atheist or anything, because I knew there was 513 00:27:53,200 --> 00:27:56,080 Speaker 3: something bigger than me. I just didn't want I didn't 514 00:27:56,119 --> 00:27:56,679 Speaker 3: know what to call it. 515 00:27:56,720 --> 00:27:59,760 Speaker 1: So I'm convinced there's no true atheist. Okay, you could 516 00:27:59,800 --> 00:28:02,440 Speaker 1: get you could at some point. You could break down 517 00:28:02,440 --> 00:28:03,320 Speaker 1: that argument pretty easy. 518 00:28:03,320 --> 00:28:05,520 Speaker 3: Absolutely. Yeah, we can go on a tandem about that. 519 00:28:05,560 --> 00:28:13,040 Speaker 3: But so long story short. The minute that it all 520 00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:18,000 Speaker 3: turned and my story really began, it was January second, 521 00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:20,119 Speaker 3: twenty twenty two, when I actually got on my knees 522 00:28:20,160 --> 00:28:23,480 Speaker 3: and and was was done because I had I had 523 00:28:23,720 --> 00:28:26,040 Speaker 3: thought I had surrendered, before, thought i'd given up and 524 00:28:26,480 --> 00:28:28,480 Speaker 3: was asking God for help, but I was there was 525 00:28:28,520 --> 00:28:33,000 Speaker 3: always this this ultimatum like I'll do this if you 526 00:28:33,040 --> 00:28:37,200 Speaker 3: do this like God helped me, or I'll be good 527 00:28:37,280 --> 00:28:40,360 Speaker 3: if you just give me this right now. And you know, religious, 528 00:28:40,360 --> 00:28:42,440 Speaker 3: it's exactly what it was, and that's how that's how 529 00:28:42,560 --> 00:28:46,240 Speaker 3: I was doing it. And but January second, twenty twenty two, 530 00:28:46,360 --> 00:28:51,680 Speaker 3: I felt the difference. I could see the difference. Since 531 00:28:51,680 --> 00:28:54,160 Speaker 3: that day, I've asked him every day, get let me 532 00:28:54,160 --> 00:28:55,440 Speaker 3: get let me out of the way, show me how 533 00:28:55,440 --> 00:28:57,040 Speaker 3: to be a service, and show me your will, show 534 00:28:57,080 --> 00:28:58,959 Speaker 3: me your will. That's it, and I try to get 535 00:28:58,960 --> 00:29:00,400 Speaker 3: out of the way. And when I noticed those things 536 00:29:00,440 --> 00:29:03,000 Speaker 3: aren't happening the way that I think they should happen, 537 00:29:03,040 --> 00:29:05,320 Speaker 3: then that's I'm not doing things in his will. I'm 538 00:29:05,360 --> 00:29:08,040 Speaker 3: just trying to, like I said earlier, plug a square 539 00:29:08,080 --> 00:29:10,280 Speaker 3: peg in a circle hole. And whenever that starts happening, 540 00:29:10,280 --> 00:29:12,800 Speaker 3: whenever I start getting pushbacks on things, then I know 541 00:29:12,880 --> 00:29:14,920 Speaker 3: that I okay, I need to step back and realize 542 00:29:15,160 --> 00:29:15,960 Speaker 3: and get out of the way. 543 00:29:16,280 --> 00:29:19,760 Speaker 1: Yeah, it so someone thirty that sermon I prepped. In 544 00:29:19,840 --> 00:29:23,440 Speaker 1: verse three, it says, if you, oh, Lord, should count iniquities, 545 00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:27,600 Speaker 1: O Lord, who could stand? Yeah, I mean that's not 546 00:29:27,600 --> 00:29:32,760 Speaker 1: a Santa Claus religion. That is, if God counts your 547 00:29:32,800 --> 00:29:36,120 Speaker 1: sins against you, no one's gonna make it. No one 548 00:29:36,240 --> 00:29:36,840 Speaker 1: is good enough. 549 00:29:36,880 --> 00:29:37,200 Speaker 3: Nobody. 550 00:29:37,280 --> 00:29:39,640 Speaker 1: The next verse, verse four says, but with you there 551 00:29:39,680 --> 00:29:44,040 Speaker 1: is forgiveness, that you may be feared so and that 552 00:29:44,160 --> 00:29:46,760 Speaker 1: it points straight to the gospel of what Jesus did 553 00:29:46,800 --> 00:29:49,440 Speaker 1: on the Cross. But you told me something interesting last 554 00:29:49,480 --> 00:29:52,600 Speaker 1: night around the campfire. You said that you you and 555 00:29:52,640 --> 00:29:56,160 Speaker 1: Shana were sharing what you read every day every day 556 00:29:56,320 --> 00:29:59,720 Speaker 1: while you're in prison in the One of the worst 557 00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:05,640 Speaker 1: imis you could possibly imagine these horrible wards in the 558 00:30:05,640 --> 00:30:08,320 Speaker 1: state of Texas, and you're in there reading the Bible 559 00:30:08,360 --> 00:30:10,760 Speaker 1: and then sharing what you read with Shane, and she's 560 00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:12,440 Speaker 1: sharing what she read daily. 561 00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:16,920 Speaker 3: Yeah, it was amazing. So when you're in prison, you 562 00:30:16,960 --> 00:30:19,400 Speaker 3: can be in prison in prison, if that makes sense, 563 00:30:19,720 --> 00:30:21,760 Speaker 3: like you can definitely you can be in prison out here. 564 00:30:22,560 --> 00:30:27,480 Speaker 3: And I wasn't going to allow myself to I wanted 565 00:30:27,520 --> 00:30:29,200 Speaker 3: to be at peace, and I was at peace on 566 00:30:29,240 --> 00:30:31,560 Speaker 3: March thirteenth, twenty twenty two, when I got sentenced. I 567 00:30:31,600 --> 00:30:34,400 Speaker 3: was at peace. Nobody else in the behind me was 568 00:30:34,440 --> 00:30:36,480 Speaker 3: at peace. My family wasn't at peace, but I was 569 00:30:36,520 --> 00:30:39,160 Speaker 3: at peace because I knew that maybe this is God 570 00:30:39,160 --> 00:30:40,760 Speaker 3: telling me to sit down for a little bit, and 571 00:30:40,800 --> 00:30:42,440 Speaker 3: this is going to give me the time to be 572 00:30:42,560 --> 00:30:46,680 Speaker 3: able to connect with God and connect with everything that 573 00:30:46,720 --> 00:30:49,440 Speaker 3: there is that I need to know, not only about 574 00:30:49,440 --> 00:30:55,560 Speaker 3: the gospel, but about myself. And by her and I 575 00:30:55,600 --> 00:30:57,920 Speaker 3: having that relationship talking a couple times a day, I 576 00:30:57,960 --> 00:31:00,040 Speaker 3: mean sometime when you're on lockdown, there's no talking. The 577 00:31:00,080 --> 00:31:01,760 Speaker 3: first five weeks I was locked up, there was no 578 00:31:01,840 --> 00:31:02,800 Speaker 3: communication at all. 579 00:31:02,880 --> 00:31:05,120 Speaker 1: Well, sometimes I was emailing you too, and we would 580 00:31:05,160 --> 00:31:06,720 Speaker 1: talk and then all of a sudden, you just you 581 00:31:06,720 --> 00:31:08,760 Speaker 1: wouldn't answer it, like I guess he's I guess they're 582 00:31:08,760 --> 00:31:09,440 Speaker 1: in lockdown again. 583 00:31:09,560 --> 00:31:13,160 Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's so you have to just any chance 584 00:31:13,200 --> 00:31:16,160 Speaker 3: you get, it's just cherish it and if you can, 585 00:31:18,840 --> 00:31:21,479 Speaker 3: you know, you just know that you're not always going 586 00:31:21,520 --> 00:31:23,120 Speaker 3: to get to talk to the person that you want 587 00:31:23,120 --> 00:31:24,560 Speaker 3: to talk to with the person that you love. But 588 00:31:24,920 --> 00:31:29,640 Speaker 3: so we grew together the most that we've ever grown. 589 00:31:29,680 --> 00:31:32,040 Speaker 3: And we were so far apart. We were not physically together, 590 00:31:32,200 --> 00:31:35,000 Speaker 3: but we grew so close together during that time just 591 00:31:35,040 --> 00:31:38,040 Speaker 3: because of our walk and how I was way over 592 00:31:38,080 --> 00:31:39,959 Speaker 3: here and she was way over here because she had 593 00:31:39,960 --> 00:31:42,520 Speaker 3: a tough upbringing, too. Her family. Her family upbringing was 594 00:31:42,560 --> 00:31:46,480 Speaker 3: tough man and so just having that all connect into 595 00:31:46,520 --> 00:31:50,240 Speaker 3: one and just and just oh it was, it was. 596 00:31:50,360 --> 00:31:52,440 Speaker 3: It was amazing. Like it brings me to tears today 597 00:31:52,520 --> 00:31:57,160 Speaker 3: just just thinking about the love that she found towards God. 598 00:31:57,640 --> 00:32:02,080 Speaker 3: Knowing the love that there is reciprocated from God, and 599 00:32:02,120 --> 00:32:06,400 Speaker 3: that's the connection that we had walking that faith. I 600 00:32:06,720 --> 00:32:08,720 Speaker 3: would hear music. I can't tell you how many times 601 00:32:08,800 --> 00:32:11,480 Speaker 3: Carry Joe and Cody Carns the Blessing played on my 602 00:32:11,560 --> 00:32:13,800 Speaker 3: tablet and I just was sitting under there with the 603 00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,440 Speaker 3: sheets over my head, just bawling my eyes out, with 604 00:32:15,480 --> 00:32:20,120 Speaker 3: my earbuds in my head, and Gyra from Maverick City Music. 605 00:32:20,160 --> 00:32:24,040 Speaker 3: Those two songs mean so much to me because of 606 00:32:25,080 --> 00:32:27,480 Speaker 3: how they played a role in my walk while I 607 00:32:27,520 --> 00:32:29,400 Speaker 3: was in prison, I wasn't in prison. 608 00:32:29,440 --> 00:32:31,520 Speaker 4: In prison, I've heard John Pepper say that when he 609 00:32:31,560 --> 00:32:33,640 Speaker 4: goes and speaks to people in prison, to men and 610 00:32:33,680 --> 00:32:37,200 Speaker 4: women in prison, that we can be more in prison 611 00:32:37,200 --> 00:32:39,240 Speaker 4: out here, be as slaves to all kinds of stuff. 612 00:32:39,240 --> 00:32:41,440 Speaker 4: But when you're in there, you have all the time 613 00:32:41,640 --> 00:32:44,320 Speaker 4: to spend with God and to read His word, and 614 00:32:44,360 --> 00:32:46,560 Speaker 4: you can be so free in there, even though you're 615 00:32:46,600 --> 00:32:49,040 Speaker 4: locked up. But praise God for bringing you and shanea 616 00:32:49,080 --> 00:32:50,800 Speaker 4: together on the same path at the same time, because 617 00:32:50,800 --> 00:32:52,600 Speaker 4: that doesn't happen a lot. 618 00:32:52,880 --> 00:32:55,479 Speaker 1: No, it happened with Amber and I actually yeah, And 619 00:32:55,480 --> 00:32:57,400 Speaker 1: people ask me that all the time. We're like, when 620 00:32:57,400 --> 00:32:59,640 Speaker 1: all this is happening with you, what about Amber? And 621 00:32:59,680 --> 00:33:02,320 Speaker 1: I'm like, man, by God's grace, for some reason, in 622 00:33:02,880 --> 00:33:05,640 Speaker 1: the Lord's kindness, he was bringing her along at the 623 00:33:05,640 --> 00:33:08,200 Speaker 1: same time. Because she could have easily, like when we 624 00:33:08,240 --> 00:33:10,000 Speaker 1: went through the whole thing with River and then all 625 00:33:10,000 --> 00:33:13,040 Speaker 1: of a sudden, the Lord saves me. She could have 626 00:33:13,080 --> 00:33:15,480 Speaker 1: been like, you're out of your mind. You know, you're 627 00:33:15,560 --> 00:33:18,240 Speaker 1: just coping. You know, you're trying to find something that 628 00:33:18,400 --> 00:33:20,800 Speaker 1: make you feel better, and that's great for you, but 629 00:33:20,880 --> 00:33:26,800 Speaker 1: I don't need that. But that's not what happened. It's 630 00:33:26,800 --> 00:33:30,720 Speaker 1: interesting too that you get back and out of the 631 00:33:30,760 --> 00:33:34,800 Speaker 1: Lord's kindness. You called me and you're like, man, I'm 632 00:33:34,800 --> 00:33:38,480 Speaker 1: in a great church where it's just right down the road. 633 00:33:38,840 --> 00:33:41,000 Speaker 1: Shane and I got plugged in and in my mind, 634 00:33:41,040 --> 00:33:42,640 Speaker 1: you know, I talk about churches all the time on 635 00:33:42,640 --> 00:33:46,400 Speaker 1: this podcast. I'm like, oh, no, dude, just finds the 636 00:33:46,480 --> 00:33:49,480 Speaker 1: trail like he's on fire for the Lord, which is great. 637 00:33:49,520 --> 00:33:51,160 Speaker 1: He gets out of prison and the first thing he 638 00:33:51,200 --> 00:33:53,320 Speaker 1: does is go right down the road jump into the 639 00:33:53,360 --> 00:33:56,840 Speaker 1: local church there. Whatever church it is, I don't know, 640 00:33:56,920 --> 00:33:58,520 Speaker 1: and it all of a sudden he loves it, and 641 00:33:58,560 --> 00:34:01,800 Speaker 1: I'm just like, oh, this can be bad. I look 642 00:34:01,840 --> 00:34:06,320 Speaker 1: it up and I friended the senior pastor on Instagram, 643 00:34:06,960 --> 00:34:10,440 Speaker 1: who I now know is Landing great brother, and I 644 00:34:10,520 --> 00:34:13,080 Speaker 1: friended him and DM him and then I was like 645 00:34:13,680 --> 00:34:16,600 Speaker 1: reading this whole bio, like where's this guy from? Because 646 00:34:16,600 --> 00:34:19,000 Speaker 1: this is important to me. Man, Like the next step 647 00:34:19,200 --> 00:34:21,400 Speaker 1: you come out of prison, you're with shaying that you 648 00:34:21,400 --> 00:34:23,919 Speaker 1: guys are building something. If you don't, if you don't 649 00:34:23,920 --> 00:34:26,440 Speaker 1: lock into a good local church that's going to walk 650 00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:28,960 Speaker 1: along with you, that's going to live life with you. 651 00:34:29,239 --> 00:34:32,280 Speaker 1: That's gonna be your brothers and sisters. That's three hours 652 00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:34,760 Speaker 1: from Amber and I. So they're your brothers and sisters 653 00:34:34,760 --> 00:34:38,200 Speaker 1: that are gonna they're gonna like my hat ninety nine 654 00:34:38,239 --> 00:34:40,560 Speaker 1: for one, that are gonna seek out the one lost 655 00:34:40,600 --> 00:34:43,840 Speaker 1: sheep out of the hundred and say, worre's calling, anybody 656 00:34:43,880 --> 00:34:46,080 Speaker 1: seen call it. It's an elder led church, So where's 657 00:34:46,120 --> 00:34:49,280 Speaker 1: calling anybody seen him. He hadn't been here in three weeks. 658 00:34:50,000 --> 00:34:53,719 Speaker 1: Someone goes, I know where I'll go get him. 659 00:34:53,920 --> 00:34:55,439 Speaker 3: Yeah, but they're beating on the door, north point. 660 00:34:55,520 --> 00:34:57,440 Speaker 1: That's what a church is supposed to do. If you 661 00:34:57,480 --> 00:34:59,160 Speaker 1: would have entered a church that you would have got 662 00:34:59,239 --> 00:35:02,280 Speaker 1: lost in are the super charismatic? And then and it's 663 00:35:02,560 --> 00:35:08,280 Speaker 1: it's it's it's not full of pastors that actually tend 664 00:35:08,440 --> 00:35:11,520 Speaker 1: the sheep. Then that would have been bad. So I 665 00:35:11,560 --> 00:35:14,200 Speaker 1: find Land and then all of a sudden, Land and 666 00:35:14,239 --> 00:35:17,760 Speaker 1: I became friends. Now he's my bro and am landon 667 00:35:18,480 --> 00:35:20,920 Speaker 1: how in the world are we like minded in ministry? 668 00:35:21,200 --> 00:35:25,080 Speaker 1: And my brother in law ends up in your church? 669 00:35:25,200 --> 00:35:28,879 Speaker 1: Only the Lord would have taken would have got you? 670 00:35:28,920 --> 00:35:31,920 Speaker 1: Because I don't think you knew right, I mean, did 671 00:35:31,960 --> 00:35:32,279 Speaker 1: you You. 672 00:35:32,360 --> 00:35:33,319 Speaker 2: Were supposed to go to that church? 673 00:35:33,360 --> 00:35:33,799 Speaker 1: That m no. 674 00:35:33,920 --> 00:35:36,719 Speaker 3: So so we're not. When we've been talking about trying 675 00:35:36,719 --> 00:35:38,359 Speaker 3: to find a local church. We lived in Joshua at 676 00:35:38,400 --> 00:35:40,200 Speaker 3: the time. Whenever I got out, we wanted to go 677 00:35:40,280 --> 00:35:42,799 Speaker 3: find a local church. So we went to a couple 678 00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:45,040 Speaker 3: of churches the first couple of weekends I got out, 679 00:35:45,239 --> 00:35:46,799 Speaker 3: and we were like, yeah, they're okay, but we're gonna 680 00:35:46,840 --> 00:35:49,080 Speaker 3: keep shopping and we were supposed to go to and 681 00:35:49,160 --> 00:35:51,840 Speaker 3: it was like eight thirty five I think am on 682 00:35:51,920 --> 00:35:54,399 Speaker 3: a Sunday, and we were driving out to the church 683 00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:56,040 Speaker 3: that we had planned on going to the not before. 684 00:35:56,280 --> 00:35:58,279 Speaker 3: Nobody's in the parking lot. So we're like, okay, well 685 00:35:58,360 --> 00:35:59,400 Speaker 3: then let's just keep driving. 686 00:35:59,760 --> 00:36:00,479 Speaker 1: So we drove. 687 00:36:00,600 --> 00:36:04,239 Speaker 3: That's pretty good, drove drove another half a mile maybe 688 00:36:04,280 --> 00:36:06,360 Speaker 3: a mile, and saw there was a bunch of cars 689 00:36:06,360 --> 00:36:08,359 Speaker 3: in this church up there on the top of the hill. 690 00:36:08,440 --> 00:36:12,719 Speaker 3: So we pulled in. Joel Harrold was the first guy 691 00:36:12,760 --> 00:36:14,880 Speaker 3: that welcomed me. He's an elder, he's a deacon at 692 00:36:14,880 --> 00:36:16,880 Speaker 3: our church, and he just was so welcoming and I 693 00:36:16,960 --> 00:36:19,800 Speaker 3: just I felt the love immediately, and so we we 694 00:36:19,960 --> 00:36:21,680 Speaker 3: got to know each other, filled out the connect card, 695 00:36:21,719 --> 00:36:24,600 Speaker 3: did all the things, went into the church, sat down 696 00:36:24,719 --> 00:36:28,719 Speaker 3: and just started worshiping, started praising, and then Landing got 697 00:36:28,760 --> 00:36:31,720 Speaker 3: up there and was just spitting fire and just tears 698 00:36:31,760 --> 00:36:33,799 Speaker 3: rolling down my eyes and I'm balling my eyes out. 699 00:36:33,840 --> 00:36:35,880 Speaker 3: She's balling her eyes out, and we looked at each 700 00:36:35,920 --> 00:36:37,080 Speaker 3: other him here like we're home. 701 00:36:37,239 --> 00:36:40,160 Speaker 4: This is Granger was so happy when he came and 702 00:36:40,200 --> 00:36:42,960 Speaker 4: he did his research with Landor. He was like, babe, 703 00:36:43,239 --> 00:36:45,640 Speaker 4: he's in a really good church. No church is perfect, 704 00:36:45,760 --> 00:36:48,440 Speaker 4: there's you know, there's it's full of centers. But to 705 00:36:48,520 --> 00:36:51,320 Speaker 4: have a healthy body of believers around you, brothers and sisters, 706 00:36:51,320 --> 00:36:54,680 Speaker 4: who who who Your pastor preaches the Word of God, 707 00:36:54,719 --> 00:36:59,200 Speaker 4: preaches Christ, Crucifide and you know, redeeming grace and just family. 708 00:36:59,640 --> 00:37:02,440 Speaker 1: Yes, he goes Landing. Their senior pastor goes to by 709 00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:04,600 Speaker 1: the way that everyone listening. This is North Point Church 710 00:37:04,760 --> 00:37:09,120 Speaker 1: in Burlesson area. So he's at a pastor's conference a 711 00:37:09,160 --> 00:37:12,719 Speaker 1: few months ago in Georgetown and he hits me up 712 00:37:12,719 --> 00:37:14,480 Speaker 1: and he's like, hey, on my way back, you want 713 00:37:14,520 --> 00:37:16,600 Speaker 1: to grab lunch. I was like yeah, So we go 714 00:37:16,600 --> 00:37:20,120 Speaker 1: go grab lunch, and you know, part of the conversation 715 00:37:20,400 --> 00:37:24,880 Speaker 1: was calling and I mean, he just genuinely loves you, 716 00:37:25,239 --> 00:37:28,759 Speaker 1: cares about you. In fact, there was a there was 717 00:37:28,800 --> 00:37:30,480 Speaker 1: a there was kind of a guy. There was this 718 00:37:30,480 --> 00:37:33,520 Speaker 1: thing going on with you at the time that would 719 00:37:33,800 --> 00:37:35,799 Speaker 1: look back, he was it was harmless, but at the 720 00:37:35,840 --> 00:37:37,960 Speaker 1: time he was like, yeah, he's he's been talking to 721 00:37:38,040 --> 00:37:40,920 Speaker 1: this guy. What do you think about it? And I 722 00:37:40,960 --> 00:37:44,240 Speaker 1: was like, oh, that's that's interesting because he's a true 723 00:37:44,360 --> 00:37:48,080 Speaker 1: pastor by the definition of the word pastor. And I 724 00:37:48,120 --> 00:37:50,520 Speaker 1: said this on the podcast a few weeks ago, that 725 00:37:50,520 --> 00:37:55,920 Speaker 1: that word comes from the word shepherd, which literally means 726 00:37:55,960 --> 00:37:59,920 Speaker 1: in context of a shepherd with the sheep, caring for, 727 00:38:00,719 --> 00:38:05,959 Speaker 1: watching them, teaching them, feeding them, loving them, protecting them. 728 00:38:06,560 --> 00:38:09,680 Speaker 1: And he is in every sense of that word. That's 729 00:38:09,719 --> 00:38:11,840 Speaker 1: what he is for you and for the rest of 730 00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:13,759 Speaker 1: his sheep. And if a church gets too big, then 731 00:38:13,800 --> 00:38:17,880 Speaker 1: he has, you know, then they must get more shepherds 732 00:38:17,920 --> 00:38:20,799 Speaker 1: for the amount of the size of the flock. And 733 00:38:20,840 --> 00:38:22,560 Speaker 1: I'm just sitting there at lunch and I was like, 734 00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:25,560 Speaker 1: this is so cool, man, because because then for the 735 00:38:25,600 --> 00:38:29,200 Speaker 1: first time in fifteen years, I could say I don't 736 00:38:29,239 --> 00:38:32,640 Speaker 1: need to be spiritually every step of the way with Colin. 737 00:38:33,360 --> 00:38:35,280 Speaker 1: Now it could just be his brother in law knowing 738 00:38:35,320 --> 00:38:37,960 Speaker 1: he has a shepherd that's going to take care of 739 00:38:38,680 --> 00:38:41,920 Speaker 1: his spiritual walk. And now we could just be brothers 740 00:38:42,600 --> 00:38:46,839 Speaker 1: and share and I don't have to think about where's Colin. 741 00:38:47,080 --> 00:38:49,080 Speaker 1: I need to go get him, because like you said, 742 00:38:49,080 --> 00:38:52,200 Speaker 1: they will be knocking down Absolutely. Man, I'm talking too much. 743 00:38:53,160 --> 00:38:55,440 Speaker 1: Let's at least ask a question or get to a 744 00:38:55,520 --> 00:38:58,319 Speaker 1: question on here podcast at grangersmith dot com if you 745 00:38:58,320 --> 00:39:03,680 Speaker 1: want to email me, and this is the prep that 746 00:39:04,040 --> 00:39:06,520 Speaker 1: and gave me. I scanned three down and I saw 747 00:39:06,560 --> 00:39:09,520 Speaker 1: the word substance and I was like, oh cool, I 748 00:39:09,520 --> 00:39:13,319 Speaker 1: read that one. That's why you're here. It says from anonymous. 749 00:39:13,640 --> 00:39:15,520 Speaker 1: I want to ask some marriage advice on how to 750 00:39:15,560 --> 00:39:18,760 Speaker 1: handle the situation. My husband and I both quit using 751 00:39:19,080 --> 00:39:22,520 Speaker 1: any type of substance when we got saved. Over the 752 00:39:22,520 --> 00:39:26,160 Speaker 1: past few months, my husband has started dipping slash smoking again, 753 00:39:26,520 --> 00:39:29,120 Speaker 1: and now he's lying about it, and every time I 754 00:39:29,160 --> 00:39:31,600 Speaker 1: catch him, he tells me I won't do it again, 755 00:39:32,040 --> 00:39:35,120 Speaker 1: but then he continues. I can't trust him and I 756 00:39:35,120 --> 00:39:37,680 Speaker 1: can't believe what he says after he lies to me 757 00:39:37,760 --> 00:39:40,239 Speaker 1: all the time. I pray him for him every day. 758 00:39:40,520 --> 00:39:44,439 Speaker 1: What should I do? Oh? One more sentence? I want 759 00:39:44,480 --> 00:39:46,279 Speaker 1: him to lead our family, but I feel like I'm 760 00:39:46,280 --> 00:39:49,120 Speaker 1: always the one leading since he always gives me gives 761 00:39:49,160 --> 00:39:52,799 Speaker 1: in to his temptations. I wish that last sentence wasn't 762 00:39:52,840 --> 00:40:00,000 Speaker 1: in there. Maybe I read it the wrong way. First 763 00:40:00,040 --> 00:40:03,120 Speaker 1: thoughts on this coin, What do you think's going on 764 00:40:03,160 --> 00:40:07,480 Speaker 1: with this dude? They quit, they got married. It sounds 765 00:40:07,520 --> 00:40:09,040 Speaker 1: like there was kind of a deal like, hey, when 766 00:40:09,040 --> 00:40:11,080 Speaker 1: we get married, we're gonna get clean. 767 00:40:11,520 --> 00:40:12,400 Speaker 3: After they got saved. 768 00:40:13,320 --> 00:40:15,000 Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. 769 00:40:15,320 --> 00:40:20,160 Speaker 3: So what I've witnessed being on I guess both sides 770 00:40:20,160 --> 00:40:27,200 Speaker 3: of it now, yeah, is you cannot change somebody else. Unfortunately, 771 00:40:28,080 --> 00:40:30,760 Speaker 3: only God can do that, and he's got to seek 772 00:40:31,040 --> 00:40:36,439 Speaker 3: that if he really wants that change. Just continue to pray, 773 00:40:36,600 --> 00:40:40,319 Speaker 3: just continue to be there for him so that he 774 00:40:40,560 --> 00:40:44,480 Speaker 3: feels safe to be honest. Maybe there's a situation. I 775 00:40:44,480 --> 00:40:49,680 Speaker 3: don't know yours, but maybe he doesn't feel safe being honest. Maybe, 776 00:40:50,640 --> 00:40:53,160 Speaker 3: speaking from my personal experience, if I was ever honest, 777 00:40:53,160 --> 00:40:54,480 Speaker 3: I felt like I was always just going to get 778 00:40:54,520 --> 00:40:56,960 Speaker 3: in trouble. So I would always try to hide it 779 00:40:57,040 --> 00:41:01,120 Speaker 3: and and lie about it so that I didn't think 780 00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:03,879 Speaker 3: I was going to get in trouble. I think even 781 00:41:03,920 --> 00:41:06,480 Speaker 3: though after they found out, I was in even more 782 00:41:06,480 --> 00:41:07,560 Speaker 3: trouble and they were like, dude, if you were just 783 00:41:07,640 --> 00:41:09,600 Speaker 3: honest with me, we wouldn't be in this situation. So 784 00:41:09,920 --> 00:41:13,040 Speaker 3: I think just telling him it's okay to be honest, 785 00:41:13,120 --> 00:41:16,399 Speaker 3: telling him it's it's okay to have those desires, but 786 00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:19,480 Speaker 3: we can pray together and ask God to remove those desires. 787 00:41:19,560 --> 00:41:21,239 Speaker 3: That's what my wife and I do we ask God 788 00:41:21,280 --> 00:41:23,560 Speaker 3: to remove the desires that we have. And I haven't 789 00:41:23,560 --> 00:41:27,320 Speaker 3: had anything in what was it one thousand and ninety 790 00:41:27,360 --> 00:41:30,840 Speaker 3: five days or something three years? Three years in January, 791 00:41:31,719 --> 00:41:34,040 Speaker 3: and I've lost the desire just because God has taken 792 00:41:34,080 --> 00:41:35,840 Speaker 3: that desire. So I think if I can give you 793 00:41:35,880 --> 00:41:38,600 Speaker 3: any advice on this is just pray with Him and 794 00:41:38,680 --> 00:41:40,840 Speaker 3: if you guys are saved, then I know. It's uncomfortable. 795 00:41:40,840 --> 00:41:42,520 Speaker 3: At first, it was very uncomfortable for my wife and 796 00:41:42,560 --> 00:41:44,560 Speaker 3: I because it was new. We'd never done it, and 797 00:41:44,600 --> 00:41:46,280 Speaker 3: so we felt kind of nerdy or kind of weird 798 00:41:46,320 --> 00:41:48,240 Speaker 3: doing it. But once you get into it and actually 799 00:41:48,280 --> 00:41:51,960 Speaker 3: start doing it together, it becomes natural and you you 800 00:41:52,120 --> 00:41:54,319 Speaker 3: want to pray with each other. And so when you 801 00:41:54,360 --> 00:41:58,279 Speaker 3: have that, that that deep love for Christ and you 802 00:41:58,320 --> 00:42:00,359 Speaker 3: can you can do that, then you can and pray 803 00:42:00,400 --> 00:42:03,520 Speaker 3: together and pray for that desire to go away. Dipping 804 00:42:03,520 --> 00:42:05,279 Speaker 3: in cigarettes is a very hard thing. I've done both 805 00:42:05,320 --> 00:42:08,040 Speaker 3: I did. I dipped for many many, many, many many years, 806 00:42:08,360 --> 00:42:10,799 Speaker 3: and it was very hard for me to have that 807 00:42:10,840 --> 00:42:15,400 Speaker 3: desire taken away. But man, with all things, nothing is 808 00:42:15,400 --> 00:42:16,560 Speaker 3: impossible for God. Man. 809 00:42:16,719 --> 00:42:19,960 Speaker 1: Yeah, I think you're right on I think there I 810 00:42:20,440 --> 00:42:22,920 Speaker 1: usually feel in some of these questions that there is 811 00:42:23,520 --> 00:42:29,400 Speaker 1: a nagging problem that's coming from her. And and so 812 00:42:29,480 --> 00:42:33,040 Speaker 1: I think it seems like he's trying to deceive you 813 00:42:33,239 --> 00:42:36,440 Speaker 1: and lie to you. And I think the fact is 814 00:42:36,480 --> 00:42:38,600 Speaker 1: he's just like, man, I don't want to deal with 815 00:42:38,880 --> 00:42:42,640 Speaker 1: what she's going to say, and I'm having trouble because 816 00:42:42,680 --> 00:42:45,520 Speaker 1: maybe he's been dipping the whole time, correct And maybe 817 00:42:45,560 --> 00:42:46,480 Speaker 1: she thought he quit. 818 00:42:46,719 --> 00:42:48,480 Speaker 3: Maybe he's just really having trouble quitting. 819 00:42:48,760 --> 00:42:53,239 Speaker 1: Yeah, And obviously the dipping and smoking thing is what 820 00:42:53,280 --> 00:42:55,600 Speaker 1: should think she's worried about, is what it would what 821 00:42:55,640 --> 00:43:00,720 Speaker 1: it's leading back to the old lifestyle. You do so good, babe, 822 00:43:00,800 --> 00:43:07,319 Speaker 1: at affirming me and pouring into the things that I 823 00:43:07,360 --> 00:43:10,440 Speaker 1: do well, and then that makes me want to be 824 00:43:10,520 --> 00:43:13,120 Speaker 1: better in the things that I'm not doing well, Like 825 00:43:13,200 --> 00:43:18,759 Speaker 1: you'll you you always tell the kids, like, Daddy works 826 00:43:18,800 --> 00:43:21,400 Speaker 1: so hard for us, And even the times when I 827 00:43:21,440 --> 00:43:24,399 Speaker 1: feel like I'm neglecting my family or working too much, 828 00:43:24,920 --> 00:43:28,240 Speaker 1: you will say, Daddy's working so hard for us, aren't 829 00:43:28,280 --> 00:43:31,359 Speaker 1: we are? Aren't we so happy that Daddy's working hard? 830 00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:34,800 Speaker 1: And then I'm like, yeah, and I need to spend 831 00:43:35,040 --> 00:43:37,480 Speaker 1: I need to pour into them that it does like 832 00:43:37,560 --> 00:43:41,280 Speaker 1: reverse psychology to me, and I don't think that's happening. 833 00:43:42,200 --> 00:43:46,480 Speaker 1: From this anonymous email. You're saying, I want him to 834 00:43:46,560 --> 00:43:48,799 Speaker 1: lead our family, but I feel like I'm always the 835 00:43:48,840 --> 00:43:52,440 Speaker 1: one leading. What if you told him? What if he said, 836 00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:58,120 Speaker 1: you lead us so well? And we've been through so 837 00:43:58,200 --> 00:44:01,480 Speaker 1: much together, And I just want to say that I 838 00:44:01,520 --> 00:44:05,439 Speaker 1: appreciate what you do for this family. I think there's 839 00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:10,440 Speaker 1: something in there that makes him go, I need to 840 00:44:10,480 --> 00:44:11,520 Speaker 1: be better in this well. 841 00:44:11,560 --> 00:44:13,759 Speaker 3: I think that too, And I think the whole accountability thing. 842 00:44:13,840 --> 00:44:17,520 Speaker 3: If you hold your partner accountable, you hold each other accountable, 843 00:44:17,719 --> 00:44:21,560 Speaker 3: and so you if you have that openness, you don't 844 00:44:21,600 --> 00:44:23,719 Speaker 3: have to line, you don't have to deceive if they 845 00:44:23,760 --> 00:44:27,040 Speaker 3: call you on your stuff. So you know what, You're right, 846 00:44:27,640 --> 00:44:31,080 Speaker 3: I am doing whatever, whatever the situation is. Thank you 847 00:44:31,120 --> 00:44:34,520 Speaker 3: for bringing that to my attention. Let's let's let's let's 848 00:44:34,640 --> 00:44:37,399 Speaker 3: do some things to make this betters. 849 00:44:37,400 --> 00:44:38,480 Speaker 2: Can I take to help you in this? 850 00:44:38,520 --> 00:44:40,880 Speaker 1: How can I help? 851 00:44:41,200 --> 00:44:45,719 Speaker 3: That's huge? That is huge. You're lying, Shana Is has 852 00:44:45,800 --> 00:44:53,480 Speaker 3: been said that one instrumental, not detrimental, maybe not not detrimental, 853 00:44:53,719 --> 00:45:00,680 Speaker 3: instrumental in everything that our family is now because of 854 00:45:00,719 --> 00:45:04,600 Speaker 3: the accountability and if I'm slacking it work, she's like, hey, man, 855 00:45:05,520 --> 00:45:08,200 Speaker 3: get on the computer, get to work. Like what are 856 00:45:08,200 --> 00:45:10,399 Speaker 3: you doing? Get off your phone? Get to work. Yes, ma'am, 857 00:45:10,440 --> 00:45:15,680 Speaker 3: I'm going. And if she's being fussy, I use air quotes. 858 00:45:16,719 --> 00:45:19,200 Speaker 3: I hold her accountable. I'm like, hey, what's really going on? 859 00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:21,080 Speaker 3: Because I know you're not mad at me for anything, 860 00:45:21,120 --> 00:45:22,680 Speaker 3: So what's really going on? And then we get to 861 00:45:22,719 --> 00:45:24,920 Speaker 3: the bottom of it. Okay, Well, a customer had made 862 00:45:24,960 --> 00:45:27,399 Speaker 3: her matter earlier in the day or something's let's talk 863 00:45:27,400 --> 00:45:30,400 Speaker 3: that out. So maybe there's some communication that needs to 864 00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:33,040 Speaker 3: be going on with both of them to say, let's 865 00:45:33,040 --> 00:45:36,480 Speaker 3: figure this thing out together and let's let's get rid 866 00:45:36,520 --> 00:45:37,480 Speaker 3: of the bs. 867 00:45:37,840 --> 00:45:41,680 Speaker 1: Yeah, it's also anonymous. It'd be helpful if you goin 868 00:45:41,760 --> 00:45:44,160 Speaker 1: to him and said, look, I've got my problems too. Absolutely, 869 00:45:45,560 --> 00:45:48,000 Speaker 1: I see you're dipping and smoking. Maybe you don't have 870 00:45:48,040 --> 00:45:51,359 Speaker 1: to lie about that. I've got enough things going on 871 00:45:51,400 --> 00:45:53,799 Speaker 1: with me. How could I How could I help you 872 00:45:53,880 --> 00:45:57,279 Speaker 1: with this? And then I need you to help me 873 00:45:57,320 --> 00:45:59,560 Speaker 1: as well, and you don't ever have to hide things 874 00:45:59,560 --> 00:46:02,759 Speaker 1: from me. We're together, We're a team, right, What do 875 00:46:02,840 --> 00:46:03,399 Speaker 1: you say on this? 876 00:46:03,560 --> 00:46:06,120 Speaker 4: I think y'all are both spot on and maybe if 877 00:46:06,120 --> 00:46:08,440 Speaker 4: he's dipping in smoke and he's stressed about something like, 878 00:46:08,480 --> 00:46:10,600 Speaker 4: how can we work through what is stressing you out 879 00:46:10,640 --> 00:46:13,000 Speaker 4: right now? And she says she wants him to lead, 880 00:46:13,040 --> 00:46:15,200 Speaker 4: And I have a couple of friends who want their 881 00:46:15,280 --> 00:46:17,680 Speaker 4: husbands to lead. And what I've had to well, what 882 00:46:17,680 --> 00:46:21,080 Speaker 4: we've all learned is that you can't nag someone into leading. 883 00:46:21,480 --> 00:46:24,040 Speaker 4: You can't bark at them and nag them into leading. 884 00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:26,759 Speaker 4: You just have to pray to the Lord for him 885 00:46:26,840 --> 00:46:29,560 Speaker 4: to change, like you said, change his desires, change his heart, 886 00:46:30,360 --> 00:46:33,920 Speaker 4: and you just live your life according to the Bible, 887 00:46:34,360 --> 00:46:38,239 Speaker 4: love him, you serve him, you pray for him, and 888 00:46:38,280 --> 00:46:40,400 Speaker 4: then you pray that he sees how you live and 889 00:46:40,440 --> 00:46:43,080 Speaker 4: his conduct has changed in that, and then just support 890 00:46:43,120 --> 00:46:45,600 Speaker 4: him however you can, and like you said, pray together, 891 00:46:46,080 --> 00:46:48,080 Speaker 4: walk through and he stresses together. 892 00:46:48,520 --> 00:46:49,920 Speaker 2: But I think y'all both nailed it. 893 00:46:51,719 --> 00:46:54,640 Speaker 1: Well. There are so many questions I'm looking at here 894 00:46:55,000 --> 00:47:00,560 Speaker 1: and not enough time because this conversation has gone well, dude, 895 00:47:00,560 --> 00:47:03,840 Speaker 1: will you come back sometime, absolutely and be on this podcast. Absolutely, 896 00:47:03,920 --> 00:47:06,520 Speaker 1: continue to just pull back layers. 897 00:47:06,160 --> 00:47:07,960 Speaker 3: Hits me in man, I'm like an onion. 898 00:47:08,120 --> 00:47:10,080 Speaker 4: People could ask questions if they have any more questions 899 00:47:10,080 --> 00:47:11,840 Speaker 4: about your walk or your life. 900 00:47:12,040 --> 00:47:15,279 Speaker 3: For sure, Yeah, yeah, please reach out. Man. It's uh 901 00:47:16,200 --> 00:47:19,560 Speaker 3: sin lives in the dark, and and when you're in 902 00:47:19,600 --> 00:47:21,759 Speaker 3: a dark place, you can get caught up in that 903 00:47:21,840 --> 00:47:29,239 Speaker 3: vicious cycle so easily because the shame, the guilt, the remorse, 904 00:47:29,960 --> 00:47:32,360 Speaker 3: all of that stuff adds up, and it's just you 905 00:47:32,480 --> 00:47:34,279 Speaker 3: carry that monkey on your back. But guess what, you 906 00:47:34,320 --> 00:47:36,760 Speaker 3: don't have to carry that monkey. I carried that monkey 907 00:47:36,800 --> 00:47:41,239 Speaker 3: for years. I carried that guilt and shame short a 908 00:47:41,239 --> 00:47:43,239 Speaker 3: little bit. I was molested when I was six or seven, 909 00:47:43,239 --> 00:47:45,280 Speaker 3: I don't remember the age. But I carried that monkey 910 00:47:45,360 --> 00:47:47,839 Speaker 3: on my back for years. I carried the monkey of 911 00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:51,359 Speaker 3: upsetting just everybody that I came in contact with. For years. 912 00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:53,600 Speaker 3: I carried that guilt and shame of selling my body. 913 00:47:54,200 --> 00:47:58,120 Speaker 3: I carried that for years, and don't I don't carry 914 00:47:58,120 --> 00:48:01,240 Speaker 3: that anymore. I've given that burden to God. I've given 915 00:48:01,360 --> 00:48:05,520 Speaker 3: everything to him. And to make it kind of easy sounding, 916 00:48:05,640 --> 00:48:08,080 Speaker 3: like why not give your worries, why not give your burdens? 917 00:48:08,120 --> 00:48:09,960 Speaker 3: Why not give that monkey off your back to him? 918 00:48:10,000 --> 00:48:12,240 Speaker 3: Let somebody else have it. He'll take it gladly. 919 00:48:12,760 --> 00:48:14,600 Speaker 4: Well, because the anemy wants you there, actually want you 920 00:48:14,640 --> 00:48:16,360 Speaker 4: stuck in that place of shame and gil so you 921 00:48:16,400 --> 00:48:18,840 Speaker 4: can step deeper and deeper into sin. So when we 922 00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:21,520 Speaker 4: come to Christ and we repent and believe in Him, 923 00:48:21,560 --> 00:48:24,439 Speaker 4: we are forgiven. There is no more condemnation for those 924 00:48:24,440 --> 00:48:25,080 Speaker 4: that are in Christ. 925 00:48:25,200 --> 00:48:28,400 Speaker 1: So people are listening to and I know there's guys 926 00:48:28,440 --> 00:48:31,400 Speaker 1: listening going, yeah, but he's got Shana. I don't have Shana. 927 00:48:31,920 --> 00:48:35,359 Speaker 1: I don't have a Shana. So don't answer that. We'll 928 00:48:35,360 --> 00:48:37,640 Speaker 1: get to that next. But I think there's a way 929 00:48:37,960 --> 00:48:40,839 Speaker 1: we can answer that as well, because people are going, well, 930 00:48:41,080 --> 00:48:42,960 Speaker 1: must be nice, man. You got a good brother in law, 931 00:48:43,000 --> 00:48:46,880 Speaker 1: sister in law, good mama, good stepdad, good good wife. 932 00:48:47,320 --> 00:48:49,360 Speaker 3: I had that for twenty years. I had all that 933 00:48:49,360 --> 00:48:52,160 Speaker 3: good stuff for twenty years, and I still did everything. 934 00:48:53,280 --> 00:48:58,799 Speaker 1: So yeah, yeah, all right, well dude, we'll have you back. 935 00:48:59,000 --> 00:48:59,880 Speaker 1: I guess we'll have you back to you. 936 00:49:00,040 --> 00:49:00,719 Speaker 2: Okay, I'll come back. 937 00:49:01,160 --> 00:49:02,640 Speaker 3: Love you guys, Bye, see. 938 00:49:02,440 --> 00:49:07,360 Speaker 1: You next month. Thanks for joining me on the Grangersmith podcast. 939 00:49:07,440 --> 00:49:09,920 Speaker 1: I appreciate all of you. Guys. You could help me 940 00:49:09,960 --> 00:49:13,520 Speaker 1: out by rating this podcast on iTunes. If you're on YouTube, 941 00:49:13,760 --> 00:49:17,000 Speaker 1: subscribe to this channel. Hit that little like button and 942 00:49:17,120 --> 00:49:20,880 Speaker 1: notification spell so that you never miss anytime I upload 943 00:49:21,160 --> 00:49:21,760 Speaker 1: a video. 944 00:49:22,200 --> 00:49:22,600 Speaker 3: Yigi