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Speaker 1: Welcome back to Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour. We're back,

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Speaker 1: We're here, and we're so glad that you've joined us today.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Kathy.

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Speaker 2: Yes we are And if you haven't listened to our

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Speaker 2: episode from Wednesday, check it out. We had our really

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Speaker 2: dear friend Nancy from The Golden Bachelor.

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Speaker 1: She was awesome. Nancy is always awesome. She is just

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Speaker 1: the kindest, sweetest, pretty person and so pretty.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and she's young, and she's really young. Yet don't

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Speaker 2: rub it ind Susan, I'm telling you, don't rub it in.

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Speaker 1: She's she is. You know, we talked to her a lot.

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Speaker 2: I love how she opened up and shared with us

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Speaker 2: about diabetes, the one tooth thing that she's getting her if.

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Speaker 1: She went, you know what, But here's the thing about Nancy,

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Speaker 1: and she said it. She wears hearing aids. She's talked

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Speaker 1: about that on the show. She has candy, she has cansling,

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Speaker 1: she has she has diabetes, she has some has a

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Speaker 1: tooth that needs to But you know what, none of

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Speaker 1: it gets her down. She is still looking for love.

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Speaker 1: She's still so positive. She doesn't look for reasons not

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Speaker 1: to engage in life. She's always looking to engage. And

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Speaker 1: I love that and she's fun. She's fun to be with.

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Speaker 2: On vacation, we were a blast of three of us.

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Speaker 2: Somebody out there is going to sweep her up.

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Speaker 1: You just wait, wait, can we just go back? We

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Speaker 1: didn't talk about it on the podcast with her. Do

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Speaker 1: you remember when we were leaving Saint Martin, Oh my god,

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Speaker 1: the flood Wait, she was at the back of the car.

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Speaker 2: The poor girl couldn't get a word in edgeways, and

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Speaker 2: people wrote that in too.

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Speaker 1: Nancy got to speak up. She she we were driving,

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Speaker 1: it was pouring rain and flights were being canceled and

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Speaker 1: Nancy is just freaking out thinking. I was laughing because

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Speaker 1: my flight back to Austin was fine, no problem, not delayed.

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Speaker 1: Susan's got a phone in each hand to a flight myself,

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Speaker 1: so me, it was no big deal. A one, Yeah,

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Speaker 1: she's booking. He's like, can't get home. I'm going to

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Speaker 1: be stuck here by myself. It was so it was funny.

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Speaker 1: It really was funny. Oh my gosh.

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Speaker 2: So today we're answering questions from fans who have written

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Speaker 2: in asking for advice, and like always, we do have

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Speaker 2: some good ones, and don't forget if you have a

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Speaker 2: question for Kathy and I reach out. Go to bachelornation

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Speaker 2: dot com slash Golden Hour. You know, it was really

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Speaker 2: interesting Nancy sharing with us. After Daisy sharing about.

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Speaker 1: Her career, yeah, her colient plan, Nancy all of a

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Speaker 1: sudden shared about what's going on with her. And so

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Speaker 1: what I find really interesting in that is she wasn't

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Speaker 1: really comfortable. We knew because we shared a room with

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Speaker 1: her at the mansion, but she wasn't really comfortable sharing

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Speaker 1: with people about having diabetes. And now she's very comfortable,

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Speaker 1: attributed to Daisy. But you know what, Susan, I think

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Speaker 1: the reason she didn't want to share it before was

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Speaker 1: she thought that people people judge her or think there's

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Speaker 1: something wrong with her, or she's not worthy of dating,

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Speaker 1: or she'd be too much trouble today and she is

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Speaker 1: that's crazy because so many people have that issue. And

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Speaker 1: she's OK, it's okay, and she said that, you know,

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Speaker 1: she told us she dated a guy who broke up

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Speaker 1: with her.

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Speaker 2: But the interesting point here is she gave credit to

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Speaker 2: Daisy speaking out. That's what gave her the courage to speak.

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Speaker 2: And you know what that does me all of us,

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Speaker 2: all of us speaking out makes it okay.

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Speaker 1: And also us old dog can learn from young puppies.

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Speaker 1: They always learn. I learned every single day. I'm alive.

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Speaker 1: All right, Well, today we're today, we're moving on and

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Speaker 1: we're going to be answering questions from fans who have

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Speaker 1: written in asking for advice, and like always, we have

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Speaker 1: got some really good ones today. Don't forget if you

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Speaker 1: have a question for Susan and me, please reut go

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Speaker 1: to Bachelor nation dot com slash Golden Hour. Yes, please

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Speaker 1: don't forget to do that.

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Speaker 2: But first, let's get started with today's question of the day.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I think we should have some fun with this

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Speaker 1: one today, Susan, we've talked a lot about meeting men

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Speaker 1: on dating apps, So here's the question. If we could

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Speaker 1: do give a man three things they should absolutely not

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Speaker 1: do so that they could have a first date.

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Speaker 2: Oh, I hope there's men paying attention out there. I

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Speaker 2: know the number one thing. Go well two, give us

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Speaker 2: one first current pictures and don't take them in the bathroom.

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Speaker 1: That's two.

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Speaker 2: That's two, Okay Current, I got more than three. Okay,

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Speaker 2: I've got a couple here too.

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Speaker 1: I like that. Mine is if you're bald, celebrated, enjoy it.

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Speaker 1: Don't wear a baseball cap and then make it worse

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Speaker 1: by turning around awards. Do not, under any circumstances hold

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Speaker 1: up dead fish and a can of beer. Oh god,

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Speaker 1: I know one like that.

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Speaker 2: But going back to if you're being bald, as long

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Speaker 2: as they're showing more than one picture, because a lot

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Speaker 2: of bald men don't want the sun on their head,

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Speaker 2: and they do wear caps a lot. So if they're

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Speaker 2: showing a picture of them doing an activity or what

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Speaker 2: have you, they're going to have that on right as

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Speaker 2: long as there is other pictures showing who you really are.

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Speaker 1: I got it. Okay, guys, listen up. A lot of

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Speaker 1: us like bald men, so don't hide it. I don't

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Speaker 1: know about you, but I think when a guy holds

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Speaker 1: up a dead fish, it's always a big long fish.

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Speaker 1: Are you trying to advertise something that takes skill? Do?

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Speaker 2: Oh?

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Speaker 1: It does? No? I know it doesn't. I think they're

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Speaker 1: advertising something else when they're whole up. Guys, it's not attractive.

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Speaker 1: Don't do it selfiees in the bathroom. I mean, with

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Speaker 1: just a note. It's gross. They're shape. It's just it's wrong.

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Speaker 2: And at fifty plus years of age. If you're still

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Speaker 2: living in your mind basement, that's not a good thing

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Speaker 2: to start with.

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Speaker 1: Okay, and the other one, I'm not sure you're going

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Speaker 1: to greet me on this one, Susan. We said top

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Speaker 1: three should have been the top thirty. Please put a

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Speaker 1: shirt on when you take a picture. Please, no towels,

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Speaker 1: I mean the low towls. All right, let's do the opposite. Okay, Okay, okay.

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Speaker 1: What could we help them with with their profile? Talk

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Speaker 1: about the things you love to do and what you're

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Speaker 1: looking for in a partner. Okay, anything else? Oh, there's

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Speaker 1: lots more, But what do you think? I agree with that?

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Speaker 2: And just be honest, be honest, don't lie about your age,

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Speaker 2: be honest. No, I've been known because after sixty I'm

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Speaker 2: going to admit it, after sixty years old. I was

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Speaker 2: sixty one, and all of a sudden, the people they

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Speaker 2: would send you on the site that match with you

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Speaker 2: were like, I'm young at heart, and I know a

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Speaker 2: lot of people are. However, when I go to meet somebody,

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Speaker 2: it's the very first thing out of my mouth. And

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Speaker 2: it was only three years. But now I don't go

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Speaker 2: on dating sites because.

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Speaker 1: I'm sixty seven. Oh my god, so so my kids.

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Speaker 1: This is true. Sorry kids, if you're listening, My kids

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Speaker 1: told me to lie about my age everybody. My daughter

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Speaker 1: Caitlin said, Mom, you're so funny, like they don't look

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Speaker 1: on you act young. But you know what, and we're

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Speaker 1: telling them not to don't lie because you're starting a

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Speaker 1: relationship right with a lie. If you'll lie about that,

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Speaker 1: what I.

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Speaker 2: Mean, if it's a couple of years and you go

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Speaker 2: to meet them, tell the truth right then.

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Speaker 1: Okay, okay, okay everyone, if you're listening, I'm sixty years old.

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Speaker 1: That's too big of a lie. Oh now we're exciting.

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Speaker 1: What's too big of a lie?

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Speaker 2: Just have current pictures, full body pictures. People like I've

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Speaker 2: heard a lot of stories, a lot of stories, men

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Speaker 2: and women both that they go and they've chatted with

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Speaker 2: somebody for a few days or weeks online and then

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Speaker 2: they talked on the phone and they go to meet

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Speaker 2: and the person shows up and they look nothing like

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Speaker 2: they did in their heads.

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Speaker 1: Shuts, you know, be real, be real. Can I just

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Speaker 1: say something that guys on a first date do what

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Speaker 1: Joey did on The Bachelor. Listen, listen, show some interest.

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Speaker 1: We don't need to hear everything that happened in your

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Speaker 1: life from the cradle. Ask Sometimes that's nerves.

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Speaker 2: I get that, but always ask about the person sitting

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Speaker 2: next to you. Don't just keep going on and on

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Speaker 2: about your life and what you do and so on.

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Speaker 2: Have you imagine Kathy for either one of us after

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Speaker 2: being on the show. Of course, we're going to have

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Speaker 2: more to say because of our experience, and they're going

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Speaker 2: to ask questions about it. But don't forget to stop,

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Speaker 2: pause and say what about you?

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Speaker 1: Sue me about who was Susan? Yeah, I'm stuck for

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Speaker 1: what you just said thirty seconds ago. We only have

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Speaker 1: a lot to say since being on the show. We

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Speaker 1: always have a lot. You gotta be kidding me. But

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Speaker 1: I learned how to listen. That's true, and listening is

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Speaker 1: so important. All right, let's move on. We've got some

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Speaker 1: great questions today. The first one comes from Chris from Arizona,

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Speaker 1: and she says, Susan and Kathy, my best friend and

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Speaker 1: I are both in committed relationships and still enjoy the

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Speaker 1: frequent girls' night out as you should. As you should,

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Speaker 1: we love to get all dressed up together, take cute picks,

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Speaker 1: drink cocktails and go dancing. Recently, I've noticed that she's

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Speaker 1: been wearing a different style of clothes. She's more covered

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Speaker 1: up and wears less makeup. When I asked her about it,

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Speaker 1: she said that her man told her that she shouldn't

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Speaker 1: get all dressed up for anyone but him. It makes

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Speaker 1: me sad she hasn't been acting like her normal, bubbly

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Speaker 1: self since she started dressing differently. Should I try to

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Speaker 1: encourage her to wear whatever she wants or will I

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Speaker 1: just get myself in between a relationship that I have

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Speaker 1: no place in?

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Speaker 2: Well, I could be off here, but the first thing

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Speaker 2: that comes to mind is that man seems very controlling

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Speaker 2: what I was going to say, and maybe he's got

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Speaker 2: the fear in her that she's doing exactly what he says.

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Speaker 2: On the other hand, was she dreckoning dressing two sexy

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Speaker 2: or two what's too sexy?

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Speaker 1: I don't know. But when you're in a relationship, I

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Speaker 1: just can't. I just can't.

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Speaker 2: She needs to be who she is exact and no man,

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Speaker 2: and I repeat, no man will ever tell you how

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Speaker 2: to dress, how to walk, how to talk, or how

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Speaker 2: to be.

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Speaker 1: You are who you are and he should love you

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Speaker 1: for that. And Carissa, if you're a good friend, you

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Speaker 1: need to explain that to her and tell her and

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Speaker 1: stand by her because they're not me even married, I

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Speaker 1: committed relationship and he's controlling her. Now, what's that going

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Speaker 1: to look like?

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Speaker 2: I noticed that she said she doesn't seem herself. That

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Speaker 2: could be an abusive thing. I would dig a little.

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Speaker 2: If you really care about her, I would dig in

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Speaker 2: and see what's making her tick, what's doing this?

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Speaker 1: I hate to say it, Susan, but it also could

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Speaker 1: be a confidence issue. How many people have we spoken

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Speaker 1: to young women who just say they don't have the confidence.

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Speaker 2: But she was wearing cool clothes and now all of

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Speaker 2: a sudden he says something and she's not.

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Speaker 1: Right because maybe she's not maybe she's not confident in their.

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Speaker 2: Relationship, telling her bad things like you don't look good

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Speaker 2: in that or once again, abusive relationship.

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Speaker 1: I would check into it. I would definitely Chrissa, you're

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Speaker 1: a nice friend. Chrissa, you are definitely a good friend.

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Speaker 1: And you know what, if you're worried about getting in

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Speaker 1: the relationship in between them, don't don't because sometimes it's

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Speaker 1: hard to hear things. But if believe me, if you're

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Speaker 1: seeing it, she's thinking it.

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Speaker 2: And if you're a really, really true friend and she

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Speaker 2: knows that and she's your friend, she'll understand. Yeah, just

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Speaker 2: be kind and gentle about it, but definitely delivery.

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Speaker 1: It comes down to delivery again, all right.

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Speaker 2: Question number two. Joan from Nevada sent us this. Hi, ladies,

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Speaker 2: I love your podcast so far, Thank you and look

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Speaker 2: forward to listening to it every week. So thank you

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Speaker 2: for being you. I am a sixty five year old woman.

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Speaker 2: I have been divorced for about ten years. I recently

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Speaker 2: started dating a man I met at the gym. He's

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Speaker 2: handsome and kind and really swept me off my feet.

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Speaker 2: We have been seeing each other for about two months.

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Speaker 2: Last week at dinner, I'm a little bit jealous right now, Okay,

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Speaker 2: he mentioned the fact, oh god, that he is still married.

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Speaker 2: He has always referred to his wife as his ex,

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Speaker 2: but he explained to me that they never legally divorced.

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Speaker 2: I'm truthfully not sure how I feel about this. I

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Speaker 2: would never knowingly date a married man. However, I also

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Speaker 2: don't want to stop seeing him at this point.

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Speaker 1: Do you have any advice?

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Speaker 2: Well, yes, I do, because some people don't do the

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Speaker 2: final thing, divorce at first. It takes sometimes years, as

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Speaker 2: long as you don't think he's cheating and they're not

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Speaker 2: actively married in the same household. But I've known people

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Speaker 2: that have gone years and not finished the paperwork, if

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Speaker 2: you will.

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Speaker 1: So, okay, yeah, I'm going to be a little bit

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Speaker 1: tougher on this one. M h. You are dating a

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Speaker 1: married man. I don't care if it's legal. It's not

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Speaker 1: his ex wife, it's his wife. It's his wife now.

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Speaker 1: He may not love her, there may not be any

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Speaker 1: intimacy in their relationship. All of that may be true, but.

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Speaker 2: And he's out on his own I live in his

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Speaker 2: own life where she doesn't really say.

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Speaker 1: She doesn't say. I'm assuming they live separately, But I

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Speaker 1: think she has to think about what does she want

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Speaker 1: because she's in love with him and wants to marry

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Speaker 1: him at some point. She's sixty five, she's been divorced

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Speaker 1: ten years. If she's looking for a permanent relationship, it's

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Speaker 1: not happening unless she's a big of mis.

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Speaker 2: My only concern is you've been seeing him for two months.

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Speaker 2: That's something I would have announced on the first meet.

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Speaker 2: Just no, I am not legally divorced. We have separate lives.

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Speaker 1: Okay, I'm going to I'm going to come clean here. Honesty,

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Speaker 1: I think is the best. Are you ready. Yeah, the

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Speaker 1: only guy I dated seriously since my husband passed away.

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Speaker 1: I dated him for about ten months. He was legally married,

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Speaker 1: he was getting divorced. They were living in separate homes.

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Speaker 1: They were separated. They clearly were not getting back together.

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Speaker 1: But that's my story. For a long time I dated man.

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Speaker 1: But here's the difference. She said, you know, I don't

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Speaker 1: know how I feel about this. I would never knowing

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Speaker 1: the data married man. I knew the guy I was

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Speaker 1: ditting was married, but he was going through the process

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Speaker 1: of a divorce. That's the difference here. He's not going

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Speaker 1: through it.

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Speaker 2: How do you know he's not going through She just

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Speaker 2: he says, ever legally divorced.

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Speaker 1: So they're not going through a divorce. They've never legally divorced.

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Speaker 1: That's the difference. And if her expectation is a marriage

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Speaker 1: or moving in together or any of those things, that's

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Speaker 1: not going to feel really comfortable when they're legally you know,

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Speaker 1: let me say this to you, darlin, you are not

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Speaker 1: going to be filing a joint tax return with that guy.

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Speaker 2: Not that you want to anyhow, I think, honestly, it's

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Speaker 2: up to you. It's how you feel about it. If

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Speaker 2: he's being honest and sincere and say his I won't

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Speaker 2: call her her ex. His wife on paper has moved

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Speaker 2: on and she might be in a relationship. It could

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Speaker 2: come down to financial reasons. So look into it, don't

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Speaker 2: jump talk about it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah good, All right, let's go with question number three.

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Speaker 1: Martin wrote, Kathy and Susan, I really love your podcast.

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Speaker 1: Thank you, Martin. I love everybody like that. Thank you, Martin.

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Speaker 1: I'm a seventy four year old man living in New Jersey.

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Speaker 1: My neighbor my wife, hey might be single. My wife

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Speaker 1: of more than fifty Oh, my wife of more than

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Speaker 1: fifty years passed away about four months ago after a

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Speaker 1: long battle with breast cancer. Yeah, she was the only

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Speaker 1: woman I had ever been with. Recently, I met a

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Speaker 1: woman at a nearby coffee shop, and I would really

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Speaker 1: like to ask her out. I have three adult children,

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Speaker 1: and at dinner one night, I broached the subject with

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Speaker 1: my two daughters. They were incredibly upset that I would

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Speaker 1: even consider dating this soon after their mom passed. I

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Speaker 1: don't want them to feel that way, but I also

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Speaker 1: want to live my life. Who knows how many good

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Speaker 1: years I have left? How would you handle this situation

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Speaker 1: with your children? Well, I can jump right in because

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Speaker 1: I've had this situation. Well it's only been four month.

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Speaker 1: First of all, Yeah, Martin, condolences, I'm losing your wife.

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Speaker 1: That's really that's tough. I would say that she's only

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Speaker 1: been gone four months and there's nothing wrong in dating her.

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Speaker 1: I'm not sure I would have broached it to my

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Speaker 1: kids this early. I might have just gone out with

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Speaker 1: her for a little bit and then, I honestly do

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Speaker 1: think because I've lived this after if you really are

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Speaker 1: interested in her, you know, down the road, let's call

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Speaker 1: it six eight months, and you really want her to

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Speaker 1: be a part of your life, then it's time to

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Speaker 1: talk to your children. When you say how many good

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Speaker 1: years do you have left? Don't rush into something. Well,

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Speaker 1: you never know how long you have left.

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Speaker 2: And I do agree with the four months is a

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Speaker 2: little soon, especially to tell your kids. I would keep

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Speaker 2: it between you and that person for quite some time

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Speaker 2: until they're ready.

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Speaker 1: They might never be ready.

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Speaker 2: And you're not replacing the mom, You're just having your

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Speaker 2: significant other, your person to share the latter years of

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Speaker 2: life with I don't think there's anything wrong with it.

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Speaker 1: I really don't.

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Speaker 2: I just don't know that I would celebrate it to

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Speaker 2: my children.

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Speaker 1: That's yeah, I will say, Martin, you do deserve We

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Speaker 1: all deserve love, we all deserve happiness. And I wish

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Speaker 1: you the best with this woman. We both do. But

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Speaker 1: I think you just got to slow your role a

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Speaker 1: little bit. You're seventy four, you don't think.

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Speaker 2: Slow your role. I still think he could meet her

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Speaker 2: and be with her. Just slow how you tell your children?

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Speaker 1: Right? You agree with you? I do, But I also

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Speaker 1: think you, if you're in good health, you know, don't

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Speaker 1: be rushing into anything. Just take your time. I guess

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Speaker 1: that's what I'm saying. Take your time and wait for

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Speaker 1: the right one. If this is the right one, great,

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Speaker 1: But your kids are it's going to take some getting

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Speaker 1: used to.

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Speaker 2: He just wants to ask around. I don't think he's

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Speaker 2: been seeing her yet. Read that I would really like

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Speaker 2: to ask her out. So he asked the kids, Oh,

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Speaker 2: you're right, was okay to ask?

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Speaker 1: Oh? God, Martin, you're a good man, you're a good member.

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Speaker 1: Ask Martin. You do not need to ask your children's

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Speaker 1: permission to do anything. You are a grown ass man.

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Speaker 2: Enjoy it and I hope she's a good lady and

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Speaker 2: we wish you the best. Yes, and if anybody has

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Speaker 2: questions for us, we want to hear them. Please go

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Speaker 2: to bachelornation dot com slash Golden Hour. You may even

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Speaker 2: be featured on our podcast. Okay, so Kathy o'millie asks

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Speaker 2: about the Bachelor Golden Hour. Is it a red flag

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Speaker 2: when a man is emotionally unavailable in a relationship? And

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Speaker 2: what have you done in relationships where you feel like

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Speaker 2: you are more in touch with your emotions than your partner?

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Speaker 2: And lastly, how do you support those who can't express

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Speaker 2: themselves as well? Oh that's a lot to me. It

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Speaker 2: is a red flag. I mean, you can't change a person.

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Speaker 1: You can't.

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Speaker 2: Some people are not in touch with their emotions like

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Speaker 2: others are. If they're emotionally unavailable, then I don't believe

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Speaker 2: they're ready for a relationship.

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Speaker 1: You know, they talk about an EQ emotional quotient. If

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Speaker 1: this guy doesn't have the ability to be vulnerable with

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Speaker 1: his emotions, and that's something really important to you, I

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Speaker 1: would say it's more than a red flag. It's a

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Speaker 1: done deal.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm very in touch with my emotions and men

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Speaker 2: don't express it as much as women, I'd say. But

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Speaker 2: bottom line is if he's not able or unavailable.

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Speaker 1: I think it's something they could talk about, right.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, but it's it is a red flag. That was

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Speaker 2: our question, And yes, I agree, it's a red flag.

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Speaker 1: I would call it. I would call it a waving

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Speaker 1: red flag. It's jumping up there. This person awesome also

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Speaker 1: asked how do you support those who can't express themselves

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Speaker 1: as well? I think you'd be their friend.

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Speaker 2: And share with them, like, there's nothing wrong with expressing

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Speaker 2: some feeling, like do you feel a certain way about things?

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Speaker 2: Maybe they don't even understand they could have had a

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Speaker 2: life that their family didn't show feelings.

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Speaker 1: You know, Yeah, I think what you said at the

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Speaker 1: top was exactly it. You know, you can only do yourself.

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Speaker 1: You can only worry about yourself. You can change yourself.

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Speaker 1: You can't change other people. You can support them by

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Speaker 1: being their friend and listening. But Millie, you are not

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Speaker 1: going to change someone who is emotionally unavailable into a

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Speaker 1: person who is emotionally available. Okay, Can I squeeze one

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Speaker 1: more in before your last one? Sure?

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Speaker 2: If there's one thing you could change about your Golden

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Speaker 2: Bachelor experience in the mansion. What would you have changed

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Speaker 2: or done differently?

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Speaker 1: Kath? Nothing?

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Speaker 2: Nothing, I would have changed some of the lighting in

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Speaker 2: the bathroom or no, well that's not what they're asking.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, no, I wouldn't. I mean, as we've talked about,

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Speaker 1: I got a lot of press from saying zip. But

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Speaker 1: you know, Teresa and I are friends. I mean, it's

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Speaker 1: just I am who I am. Change anything? Yeah, you

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Speaker 1: and I are who we are and that's why we

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Speaker 1: have such a good time. Okay, on all right? Jason asked,

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Speaker 1: This is gonna be a tough one. Jason asked, Hello,

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Speaker 1: Kathy and Susan. Hi, Jason, Hi, Jason. I am curious

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Speaker 1: about your thoughts on Paula Moury Polly Amory. Polly Amory,

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Speaker 1: my wife and I opened our relationship a few years

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Speaker 1: ago and it's been working really well for us, but

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Speaker 1: we are afraid to tell our parents due to fear

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Speaker 1: of judgment. I would I would love your perspective on

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Speaker 1: it all because you are from our parents generation. Would

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Speaker 1: you be supportive if your kid was in an happy

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Speaker 1: and healthy, open relationship. Thank you for your insight.

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Speaker 2: Some things are left to be private. I don't want

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Speaker 2: to judge you, but no, I would not tell your

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Speaker 2: parents like they're not going to get it.

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Speaker 1: You know. I don't know how I feel about that.

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Speaker 1: I think that if your parents I have a son

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Speaker 1: who's gay and I love him, I don't judge him.

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Speaker 1: I think if your parents are going to judge you,

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Speaker 1: it's only maybe because polyamori is not as accepted a detail.

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Speaker 1: So if you're in a polyamorous relationship and it's working

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Speaker 1: for you, I don't think it's as mainstream as you know,

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Speaker 1: the LGBTQ community or heterosexual community. But I think that

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Speaker 1: that people who judge those kinds of relationships they need

432
00:24:07,200 --> 00:24:10,399
Speaker 1: to step back. I think you're right maybe keeping it

433
00:24:10,440 --> 00:24:11,560
Speaker 1: to yourself for your parents.

434
00:24:11,600 --> 00:24:14,200
Speaker 2: You're afraid to tell your parents, you should be yes,

435
00:24:14,359 --> 00:24:15,639
Speaker 2: don't tell them?

436
00:24:15,800 --> 00:24:20,080
Speaker 1: Well when when? Second? What? Whoa? Whoa? Whoa? Whoa? What if?

437
00:24:20,920 --> 00:24:23,840
Speaker 1: Let's play this one out. Okay, I've got a kid

438
00:24:23,920 --> 00:24:27,640
Speaker 1: he's in a polyamorous relationship. I don't. But let's say

439
00:24:27,640 --> 00:24:32,040
Speaker 1: he does, okay, or she and they bring home. Let's

440
00:24:32,119 --> 00:24:36,040
Speaker 1: let's say, you know, my son brings home, you know,

441
00:24:36,200 --> 00:24:38,439
Speaker 1: Joe one week and Sam the next week. What do

442
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:41,360
Speaker 1: I think, what am I going to think she's a prostitute.

443
00:24:41,480 --> 00:24:44,320
Speaker 1: I mean, let's just say it for what it is.

444
00:24:44,920 --> 00:24:50,680
Speaker 2: This I'm taking it for the other week. Right, he's married,

445
00:24:51,280 --> 00:24:53,680
Speaker 2: they have their own life. They want to share this.

446
00:24:54,040 --> 00:24:57,520
Speaker 2: They're asking our advice because they're old school life. I'm sorry,

447
00:24:57,560 --> 00:25:00,680
Speaker 2: it doesn't say their marig's been working. Really, my wife

448
00:25:01,080 --> 00:25:05,000
Speaker 2: and I opened our relationship a few years all right.

449
00:25:04,960 --> 00:25:08,760
Speaker 1: So I can't read give me a break. Okay, you

450
00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:12,200
Speaker 1: know what that I even think more strongly if if you.

451
00:25:12,280 --> 00:25:13,960
Speaker 2: Want to tell your mom and dad, it's like telling

452
00:25:14,040 --> 00:25:17,080
Speaker 2: ARMIEMI or pop up or not. Yeah, you know what,

453
00:25:17,359 --> 00:25:19,480
Speaker 2: keep it at home, honey, enjoy your life. I'm not

454
00:25:19,600 --> 00:25:20,800
Speaker 2: judging you, but don't tell.

455
00:25:20,920 --> 00:25:23,480
Speaker 1: So, okay, Susan, we're gonna play this again. Okay, now

456
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:28,359
Speaker 1: we know it's his wife. Yes, Okay, the coming to suit, Auntie, Mimi,

457
00:25:28,440 --> 00:25:31,359
Speaker 1: whatever you go by. We're gonna have a spaghetti dinner.

458
00:25:31,520 --> 00:25:36,040
Speaker 1: Yeah right, he brings. He brings the wife Julie with him.

459
00:25:36,240 --> 00:25:39,919
Speaker 1: The next week he wants to bring Susie. He's married.

460
00:25:39,960 --> 00:25:44,359
Speaker 1: He brings Julie every time. You know what, You're not

461
00:25:44,359 --> 00:25:46,800
Speaker 1: going to see your kid ever again? Why? Because he

462
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:48,840
Speaker 1: can't keep it straight when he's with Julie and when

463
00:25:48,840 --> 00:25:50,880
Speaker 1: he's with the other one. Look what he's asking.

464
00:25:51,320 --> 00:25:54,520
Speaker 2: We are afraid to tell our parents due to the

465
00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:59,080
Speaker 2: fear of judgment. They want our perspective. I'm pretty open minded.

466
00:25:59,200 --> 00:26:02,000
Speaker 2: You I want just you and your wife. I don't

467
00:26:02,000 --> 00:26:05,280
Speaker 2: want to know about the other people. That's all he asked.

468
00:26:05,320 --> 00:26:08,600
Speaker 2: I told, Okay, so you are you? You the one

469
00:26:08,600 --> 00:26:10,159
Speaker 2: who always says you don't judge.

470
00:26:10,560 --> 00:26:15,080
Speaker 1: I'm not judging. Oh you're not judging, Kathy. Hear my words.

471
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:17,760
Speaker 1: Don't tell me you're judging to me bad.

472
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:22,120
Speaker 2: Asking my opinion of if he should tell his parents.

473
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:24,480
Speaker 2: But he's afraid they're going to judge him. I'm not

474
00:26:24,640 --> 00:26:26,320
Speaker 2: judging him. Knock yourself out.

475
00:26:26,320 --> 00:26:31,080
Speaker 1: What he's asking what Look read the question together.

476
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:35,000
Speaker 2: I am afraid to tell our parents due to fear

477
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:35,879
Speaker 2: of judge.

478
00:26:35,920 --> 00:26:38,360
Speaker 1: And if you don't believe that they would be judged

479
00:26:38,520 --> 00:26:40,840
Speaker 1: by the parents, you they do believe they'd be judged

480
00:26:40,840 --> 00:26:42,399
Speaker 1: by their parents, and they're not going to get it.

481
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:44,600
Speaker 1: And you just said you wouldn't let them come for dinner.

482
00:26:44,680 --> 00:26:47,400
Speaker 1: You're judging, admit it. No no, no, no, no no. Would

483
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:50,199
Speaker 1: you let your son come with his wife one weekend,

484
00:26:50,240 --> 00:26:51,240
Speaker 1: his girlfriend the next.

485
00:26:51,600 --> 00:26:55,160
Speaker 2: Now, then you're judging. Okay, what's not judging. I'm not

486
00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:58,360
Speaker 2: condemning what they're doing. Hear me, Katy, pay attention.

487
00:26:58,760 --> 00:27:01,840
Speaker 1: Hear me. You do what you do, I'll honor it.

488
00:27:02,200 --> 00:27:04,160
Speaker 1: I'm not judging. You have a ball.

489
00:27:04,600 --> 00:27:07,560
Speaker 2: But when it comes to your elderly parents, they don't

490
00:27:07,680 --> 00:27:11,840
Speaker 2: get this, and I just think some things are better

491
00:27:12,000 --> 00:27:12,879
Speaker 2: left unsaid.

492
00:27:13,320 --> 00:27:15,159
Speaker 1: Okay, they don't have to say it. Just show up

493
00:27:15,160 --> 00:27:19,080
Speaker 1: with her all of a sudden. Kathy's cool, too cool

494
00:27:19,119 --> 00:27:24,160
Speaker 1: for school. I'm just saying he said that's he said.

495
00:27:24,240 --> 00:27:27,240
Speaker 1: We're up their generation. I would not want my child

496
00:27:27,240 --> 00:27:28,439
Speaker 1: to keep something like that from me.

497
00:27:29,240 --> 00:27:31,679
Speaker 2: So everybody, if you have a question for us, we

498
00:27:31,800 --> 00:27:34,280
Speaker 2: do want to hear it. Even if we disagree, we

499
00:27:34,359 --> 00:27:37,719
Speaker 2: agree to disagree. Go to Bachelor Nation dot com slash

500
00:27:37,760 --> 00:27:41,879
Speaker 2: Golden Hour. You may even be featured on our podcast. Okay, Susan,

501
00:27:41,920 --> 00:27:44,040
Speaker 2: you know how we love to play games. Yes, okay,

502
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:47,480
Speaker 2: we're gonna do one today. It's it's the game that

503
00:27:47,520 --> 00:27:52,880
Speaker 2: we call moral quandary. Okay, one of us will read

504
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:55,679
Speaker 2: a quandary and when we each then we each have

505
00:27:55,760 --> 00:27:57,879
Speaker 2: to try to guess what the other would do in

506
00:27:57,920 --> 00:28:00,239
Speaker 2: the situation, you ready, I think?

507
00:28:00,359 --> 00:28:05,000
Speaker 1: So? Okay, all right, Susan. Yes, you are flying from

508
00:28:05,040 --> 00:28:08,600
Speaker 1: New York to LA and you have an aisle seat.

509
00:28:09,000 --> 00:28:13,080
Speaker 1: A mother and her young child are sitting next to you.

510
00:28:13,080 --> 00:28:16,680
Speaker 1: You can tell the mom is struggling with the fussy toddler,

511
00:28:17,119 --> 00:28:19,720
Speaker 1: and the woman remarks that her husband is sitting in

512
00:28:19,720 --> 00:28:23,120
Speaker 1: a few rows back in a middle seat. Susan's gonna

513
00:28:23,119 --> 00:28:25,480
Speaker 1: be tossing the kid over. But okay, I'm not taking

514
00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:27,280
Speaker 1: a million. Do you give up your aisle so the

515
00:28:27,320 --> 00:28:29,520
Speaker 1: family can sit together? No, but I'll have the kid

516
00:28:29,560 --> 00:28:31,480
Speaker 1: on my lap. I'm like a kid mag that I'll

517
00:28:31,480 --> 00:28:33,879
Speaker 1: make them happy and stop crying. I'll give them things,

518
00:28:33,920 --> 00:28:36,800
Speaker 1: I'll help with the kid. That's not what she's asking.

519
00:28:37,760 --> 00:28:41,240
Speaker 1: Would you give up your seat? Yes?

520
00:28:41,320 --> 00:28:44,560
Speaker 2: See selfish, that's it selfish, not selfish. I don't do

521
00:28:44,600 --> 00:28:46,640
Speaker 2: middle seats. I had to do one not too long ago,

522
00:28:46,680 --> 00:28:47,840
Speaker 2: for five and a half hours.

523
00:28:47,840 --> 00:28:49,640
Speaker 1: I was not happy. Can I just tell you, let's

524
00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:52,240
Speaker 1: be clear, you don't do aisle seats. You do windows

525
00:28:52,280 --> 00:28:54,560
Speaker 1: so you can put your head against the missile too.

526
00:28:55,520 --> 00:28:58,640
Speaker 2: So yeah, I mean, if it was really really bad

527
00:28:58,680 --> 00:29:01,200
Speaker 2: and the father was the only one that could do it. Okay, maybe,

528
00:29:01,200 --> 00:29:02,960
Speaker 2: but normally no, I would just try to give the

529
00:29:03,000 --> 00:29:06,320
Speaker 2: mom a hand. But let me guess, Kath, you're going

530
00:29:06,400 --> 00:29:08,560
Speaker 2: to give up the seat a large and go sit

531
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:11,880
Speaker 2: in the middle of two people for six hours?

532
00:29:12,120 --> 00:29:15,480
Speaker 1: Nope, no, not even a little bit. She is just

533
00:29:15,680 --> 00:29:18,920
Speaker 1: like me. I got to tell you. I was on

534
00:29:19,000 --> 00:29:22,800
Speaker 1: a flight recently to La. Yeah, two rows back, it's

535
00:29:22,800 --> 00:29:26,719
Speaker 1: almost I think I wrote this question. There was a

536
00:29:26,760 --> 00:29:31,360
Speaker 1: mother with her husband sitting a row ahead. Huh, and

537
00:29:32,120 --> 00:29:36,000
Speaker 1: the kid was screaming, you know, past the kid to

538
00:29:36,040 --> 00:29:39,160
Speaker 1: the husband. No. No, he was sitting with the older child,

539
00:29:39,200 --> 00:29:41,720
Speaker 1: she had the younger one. The flat attendant kept coming

540
00:29:41,760 --> 00:29:43,600
Speaker 1: by and saying, can I get you or anything? I said, yeah,

541
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:46,320
Speaker 1: I'm muzzle it.

542
00:29:46,520 --> 00:29:48,880
Speaker 2: Why not give the child to the father halfway through?

543
00:29:48,960 --> 00:29:52,240
Speaker 2: I don't give me a break. Why do mothers always.

544
00:29:51,560 --> 00:29:52,880
Speaker 1: Have to do it? I don't know, but I'm not

545
00:29:52,920 --> 00:29:54,280
Speaker 1: picking up my seat, you know what.

546
00:29:54,200 --> 00:29:56,880
Speaker 2: I do feel sorry for them. I mean, obviously they

547
00:29:56,960 --> 00:29:58,840
Speaker 2: have to get somewhere and you have to take kids.

548
00:29:58,880 --> 00:30:02,520
Speaker 2: And whether the child not feeling good or just a fussbucket.

549
00:30:01,960 --> 00:30:07,240
Speaker 1: Great, Susan, Susan, I do anything to any Wait, wait,

550
00:30:07,240 --> 00:30:09,760
Speaker 1: he'll do anything. Give up your seat. Okay.

551
00:30:09,840 --> 00:30:15,080
Speaker 2: Kathy, the cashier at Nordstroms is talking on her phone

552
00:30:15,560 --> 00:30:20,120
Speaker 2: and made you wait about five minutes before ringing you up.

553
00:30:20,600 --> 00:30:23,880
Speaker 2: When she finally does you realize she doesn't charge you

554
00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:26,160
Speaker 2: for one of the sweaters you're buying?

555
00:30:26,200 --> 00:30:27,080
Speaker 1: Do you tell her?

556
00:30:28,120 --> 00:30:30,560
Speaker 2: I don't think you'd get as far as letting her

557
00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:31,880
Speaker 2: ring you up without a comment.

558
00:30:32,040 --> 00:30:34,360
Speaker 1: Who were you talking to? Really? You're making me wait?

559
00:30:34,480 --> 00:30:36,760
Speaker 1: I don't think so, lady, Okay, but do you think

560
00:30:36,800 --> 00:30:38,240
Speaker 1: I would tell her she didn't ring up one of

561
00:30:38,280 --> 00:30:41,880
Speaker 1: the sweaters? Yeah, without a doubt. That's actually happened to making.

562
00:30:41,960 --> 00:30:44,120
Speaker 2: Yeah, because they're going to be responsible for it. It's

563
00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:45,640
Speaker 2: just like stealing, straight up steal.

564
00:30:45,960 --> 00:30:49,280
Speaker 1: That's exactly what it's a I literally went back to

565
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:51,600
Speaker 1: the grocery store once when they didn't charge me for

566
00:30:51,640 --> 00:30:54,360
Speaker 1: a gallon of milk? How did you even know? Because

567
00:30:54,400 --> 00:30:56,440
Speaker 1: I looked at my receipt and I went home. Did

568
00:30:56,440 --> 00:30:58,440
Speaker 1: you ever leave? And underneath the card I had like

569
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:01,560
Speaker 1: a case of water or something. I always I always

570
00:31:01,680 --> 00:31:03,560
Speaker 1: always go back. I don't want I got enough things

571
00:31:03,560 --> 00:31:07,200
Speaker 1: to have a kilo. I'm going to guess you I

572
00:31:07,240 --> 00:31:09,880
Speaker 1: would have either walked away within those five minutes that

573
00:31:09,920 --> 00:31:12,600
Speaker 1: I was waiting, or call me rude. But I would

574
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:14,880
Speaker 1: have been nice about excuse me, excuse me.

575
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:17,920
Speaker 2: But you wouldn't say that's not your boss on the phone,

576
00:31:17,960 --> 00:31:20,000
Speaker 2: that you should be waiting on me. I have issues

577
00:31:20,040 --> 00:31:24,840
Speaker 2: about today's people, the younger generation. They're almost rude a

578
00:31:24,840 --> 00:31:28,520
Speaker 2: lot of people when they're working for you know, I'm

579
00:31:28,520 --> 00:31:29,280
Speaker 2: sure pennies.

580
00:31:29,360 --> 00:31:33,320
Speaker 1: Wait, are you generalizing that all the younger are not all? No?

581
00:31:33,400 --> 00:31:35,760
Speaker 1: Absolutely no, don't put words in my mouth. That's not good.

582
00:31:36,000 --> 00:31:39,479
Speaker 2: But if somebody's standing there waiting and you're having a

583
00:31:39,520 --> 00:31:43,400
Speaker 2: personal phone call for five minutes, five minutes is a

584
00:31:43,440 --> 00:31:46,080
Speaker 2: lifetime when you're standing there idle, I'm sorry.

585
00:31:46,160 --> 00:31:48,520
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm going to say something. I'm probably gonna say something,

586
00:31:48,560 --> 00:31:50,640
Speaker 1: but I'm not stealing a sweat and I deal with sweat.

587
00:31:50,680 --> 00:31:51,440
Speaker 1: Excuse me, babe.

588
00:31:51,440 --> 00:31:54,080
Speaker 2: Not only are you rude and made me wait five minutes, now,

589
00:31:54,080 --> 00:31:55,239
Speaker 2: you're not even ringing it up.

590
00:31:55,240 --> 00:31:57,600
Speaker 1: Correct? Do I get this on the house. I would

591
00:31:57,600 --> 00:32:00,680
Speaker 1: make sure they knew they gave it to me. You're

592
00:32:00,720 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 1: two funny, all right, here's the next one. You're a

593
00:32:03,760 --> 00:32:07,240
Speaker 1: party and a couple hands you their iPhone, to show

594
00:32:07,280 --> 00:32:10,760
Speaker 1: you pictures of their new house. You scroll too far

595
00:32:11,240 --> 00:32:14,400
Speaker 1: and see naked pictures of them? Do you say anything?

596
00:32:14,480 --> 00:32:17,840
Speaker 1: Hell yeah, I'll be like, yeah, checking out, don't you

597
00:32:18,040 --> 00:32:21,840
Speaker 1: look good? What do you think I would do? Swipe?

598
00:32:22,840 --> 00:32:24,800
Speaker 1: You think I would just keep triping that you'd say

599
00:32:24,840 --> 00:32:27,320
Speaker 1: something when you damn right? I would like, look at it.

600
00:32:27,760 --> 00:32:29,880
Speaker 1: I mean I'd probably hold it up to the party.

601
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:33,080
Speaker 1: Look what I found. I would know you if you

602
00:32:33,120 --> 00:32:35,720
Speaker 1: ever did that to me, then then don't put those

603
00:32:35,760 --> 00:32:40,160
Speaker 1: kind of pictures on your phone. You put them on Really,

604
00:32:40,280 --> 00:32:42,239
Speaker 1: a couple has their own do the old fashioned thing.

605
00:32:42,280 --> 00:32:45,400
Speaker 1: Get a photo album. Oh, for God's thanked up, come

606
00:32:45,480 --> 00:32:46,000
Speaker 1: up with the time.

607
00:32:46,000 --> 00:32:50,640
Speaker 2: It's called photo vault, a photo this way, somebody can't

608
00:32:50,680 --> 00:32:52,360
Speaker 2: accidentally see those things.

609
00:32:52,440 --> 00:32:54,520
Speaker 1: You know what, I would say, how embarrassing though, right

610
00:32:54,800 --> 00:32:57,680
Speaker 1: it would be, you know if it was their kids

611
00:32:57,680 --> 00:33:00,360
Speaker 1: looking like mom, oh if it were my kids, drop

612
00:33:00,400 --> 00:33:04,440
Speaker 1: the phone and run all right? All right? So la,

613
00:33:05,720 --> 00:33:08,800
Speaker 1: So I think, actually, this does it again. These episodes

614
00:33:08,840 --> 00:33:10,120
Speaker 1: seem to go so fast.

615
00:33:10,160 --> 00:33:12,360
Speaker 2: I have such a good time to share with you all.

616
00:33:12,760 --> 00:33:15,479
Speaker 2: And that does it for this episode. Thank you so

617
00:33:15,600 --> 00:33:18,520
Speaker 2: much for joining us today on Bachelor Happy Hours.

618
00:33:18,560 --> 00:33:21,400
Speaker 1: Golden Hour. We love this. You're absolutely right. This is

619
00:33:21,440 --> 00:33:23,600
Speaker 1: fun for us and we love hearing from you guys,

620
00:33:23,840 --> 00:33:26,600
Speaker 1: and we really want you to follow us on our

621
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:30,040
Speaker 1: Bachelor Happy Hour Golden Hour because new episodes come out

622
00:33:30,120 --> 00:33:30,680
Speaker 1: every week.

623
00:33:30,800 --> 00:33:33,840
Speaker 2: Make sure to submit your questions to us because as

624
00:33:33,880 --> 00:33:36,320
Speaker 2: you see, we read them all and I can't wait

625
00:33:36,360 --> 00:33:38,520
Speaker 2: till a voice one come so that we can air

626
00:33:38,560 --> 00:33:43,120
Speaker 2: it and have you on our podcast. Go to Bachelornation

627
00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:46,600
Speaker 2: dot com slash Golden Hour to send them in. Plus,

628
00:33:46,640 --> 00:33:50,440
Speaker 2: don't forget if you do have that friend that is

629
00:33:50,600 --> 00:33:52,560
Speaker 2: looking for somebody, send them.

630
00:33:52,480 --> 00:33:55,720
Speaker 1: Our way and we'll check them out. And listen to

631
00:33:55,920 --> 00:34:00,240
Speaker 1: Bachelor Happy Hours Golden Hour on the iHeartRadio app app

632
00:34:00,360 --> 00:34:03,360
Speaker 1: or wherever you listen to podcasts. But first send those

633
00:34:03,360 --> 00:34:08,080
Speaker 1: guys our way. H